Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #644 - Rick Ramos and Joey's list of the 10 movies you should watch over the holiday break

Episode Date: December 24, 2018

Rick Ramos, a stand up comedian, actor and the host of the "Watch This with Rick Ramos" podcast, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio to talk about Joey's list of the 10 movies you should watch over the holiday break.  This podcast is brought to you by:   Hellotushy.com - Go to Hellotushy.com/muffler for 10% off of your portable bidet order. My Bookie - Join now and MYBookie will match your deposit with up to a 50% bonus of your first deposit up to $1,000. www.mybookie.ag. Use Promo code CHURCH to activate the offer.   Recorded live on 12/21/2018.  

greetings from podcastville it's motherfucking Christmas Eve but guess what it's still Monday and you got to get your party motherfucking started now the church what's happening now is brought to you by hello tushy.com are you sick and tired of your ass smelling like ten dead Billy goats it's time for a portable bidet go to hello tushy.com they have been portable bidets starting at $69 and they come with hot water but I mean listen your asshole could be brand new you understand me you're single you got nothing going on it's not your breath it's not your haircut maybe it's a sniff or your whiff you follow me

it's time to watch that muffler go to hello tushy.com right now and put in muffler and get 10% off your order right that's how I work it's easy and it kind of mom don't know whatever the fuck the word is number two bow season is here it's time to get it on the action with my bookie don't be that guy ruining interest on your relatives or friends sit around watching the game not this year with that when there's a record 41 bow games to bet on 41 bow games including the national championship on January 7th this is a beautiful time of the year if you want to make some money you got the ball games you got NFL

playoffs you got basketball do me a favor join my bookie and they'll offer you 50 percent deposit bonus to make sure you have a nice bankroll for both seasons use promo code church when you deposit to activate the offer that means if you put in a hundred boom they'll put in 50 but you got to use promo code church CH you are CH and that's at my bookie and I recommend them you play you win you get paid kick that fucking muley oh shit it's Monday December 24th if you didn't get her a gift yet fuck it show up with a big dick and a bow around it that's it baby it's Christmas Eve motherfuckers 2018 here you go right here

fresh from a week off we're back motherfuckers oh what Rick Ramos from what's this podcast the Christ killer during the holidays you shouldn't be allowed in this motherfucker but fucking I love it too much you don't want no Jews around here on the Christmas week it's bad luck it's like having a Chinese guy behind you at the blackjack table we're throwing heat here today motherfuckers it's the gap band taking it back my brothers from fucking Birmingham, Alabama are you fucking kidding me I'm not break out the heroin we're going deep you're

showing up the grandmas with a nod you know what I'm saying a little itchy but who gives a fuck thank you thank you very much for fucking hanging in there with us we had to take a week off I was in New York after week thank you very much we're appreciating the Ralphie May podcast we put it up for a reason I put it up for various reasons it's a funny fucking podcast plus it makes us remember that you know one minute they one minute that God don't take nobody for granted but how the fucking high note my man Rick Ramos is here from the watch this podcast Rick Ramos I feel he is one of the most talented fucking

people I know when it comes to movies directors why they did it the second they did that shit you know you don't want to put a fucking thank God this guy don't snort coke you put you snort coke put a movie on with him you're done he'll tell you who bought the table why they bought it downtown but we're gonna talk about the 10 movies you should watch over the holidays I'm not talking about fucking like you know what's the gun for these obscure films I want to hit you yeah this is shit I've been thinking about lately I'm not guess what out of the 10 I wrote down I'm probably gonna watch one I got no time I forgot the kids got

no fucking school the next two yeah I mean you were buried no she's gonna be running you while your best bet is to take her to park and run her run her runner and then a little fucking knock there's a rule at the house yeah next week I gotta get into the park Monday by night yeah so Monday my wife has I got to do something in the morning I'm doing a podcast then Christmas day 9 o'clock we get the gifts let's get out and run hit the monkey bars yeah those monkey bars hard she does that swing for her fucking core mm-hmm she runs she chases she's always makes friends with the ugliest kid at the park and next you

know they're running together they're chasing each other she comes home scratching what am I gonna do it we had smell the neck but what am I gonna do sometimes I smell a hand it smells like 10 bodies from the sweat and I'm fucking chasing I tell my wife in shampoo and it smells terrible but you gotta get them going loose dog I saw it in New York yeah our vacation was great you know it was a little short yeah but the vacation was great we got to go to we did two mistakes we stayed in New Jersey mm-hmm I did it because of the ferry ride yeah it's a ferry ride for us mm-hmm but for her she's jacuzzo yeah the

waves are hitting she thinks it's the ocean yeah fucking Hudson River you see a hand floating you know I was looking for I kept telling look at that oh there's no I'm daddy I'm telling you there's an arm that it's real Puerto Rican off this fucking bridge list right 365 days a year that 200 people got to go a year yeah George Washington bridge really I think so yeah people are losing it man it's a lot of life you know walk up to that bridge you don't know how many times I looked over that bridge is a bucket that's a beautiful jump worse than that can happen as you break four ribs something no I think that's the best thing

they could happen if you jump off the George Washington bridge if you if it if you die and it's over and there's nothing else to be worried about and cleaning boy jump off the bridge and live yeah they've done they've done it all the time a couple break their legs break their back you know it don't work out like you think it's going to work out and then you're you're suffering for the rest of what little bit of life before did it Rambo did it yeah no we all jumped off cliffs and they fucking live they ran ran ran after that every three and a half days someone does it I told you see three and a half in 2015 let's see if

I can find an actual number shit people are miserable people are fucked up it's a hard world out there you know when you're working a job and your boss is coming down on you about every goddamn thing being a prick about it you know if you're on the ferry if you're on the ferry you might catch a body hell yeah well it was a little suicide he's going right by it so this is why you wanted to stay in New Jersey cuz you like that you like you're not knowing what's gonna never know it's a fucking adventure man I'm telling you all those low and all this they always find the body in the river don't they right we we caught him

floating off the Hudson how come I can't fucking see a fucking body when I go across that ferry especially with my kid in the fucking thing you make a day no way yes it would you don't you remember that forever yeah I still remember the dead body the first body I ever smelled really I still remember what it smelled like from 10 feet away and it was heavy and these kids were used to it they just kick the piece of plywood off of them you can hear the flies like the heavy oh my god it was like fucking and I was scared of course I couldn't fold yeah this is my introduction into a whole new fucking sector kids I couldn't

fold like you want to see that body I'm like come on and then like come on let's go when you're a kid you remember you're terrified of everything but you're captivated by it you got to see it I mean there's that thing that scares the shit out of you but you got to see stuff you gotta you know you gotta take those chances you know the fear was there but it wasn't enough to stop you from doing the shit you wanted to do I love that time I wish I had that I wish I had that fearlessness I remember when I was walking with them that I had a fear that they were gonna beat me up mm-hmm like they were just gonna take me down

to Riverside Drive to beat me up it was like Riverside Drive Riverside Drive wasn't really finished at that time and you just kept walking towards and there was a fence there and the body was there with clothes on it was a man yeah and it had been there I go how long and that's the first day I met them like I was talking to Jerry Rocha and he's telling me that he remembers going to Mexico when he lived in Laredo you go to Mexico every other weekend with your grandpa to get a haircut that there would be kids out there and then you will play soccer with them then and that you you'd spend he'd spend the whole day

in Mexico like every two weeks and they became friends with these kids that's really rare that that you go into another neighborhood and the kids you know we were playing yeah next you know they're like you want it they want to impress me yeah like you live on 88 Street with white people and I'm like no no no no no we're like the superintendents of the building like I was ashamed yeah money yeah and we went down there and that smell that smell yeah like it was fucking just like I had it like it was like I had had a glass of milk yeah I can feel everything coming up to my throat mm-hmm but I had to keep

walking they kept walking well you couldn't show it in front of them no because then you would have them were walking away from there going Jesus fucking Christ Jesus fucking Christ so back to my daughter crossing the fucking ferry that's all that's all I wanted so how to see a body floating by shit why you're eating ice cream saying she's enjoying a cup of ice cream and next you know bodies floating by mm-hmm that's it but like a missing limb like a shark got him like one of those fucking bass you know God knows what kind of God knows yeah a fucking guinea pig might fuck a snake next to you know it's

enough it's a river yeah what's up whatever's underneath there man that's scary shit oh my god the years ago they dug up the Bronx River mm-hmm and what they found was just cars yeah cars yeah 2,000 stone I don't know what I'm exaggerate but yeah 14 cars in the Bronx River or something something just fascinating how many cars they found how many bodies are in there that's the thing that's mafia fucking yeah the hotbed of the 50s 60s but that's everywhere I mean do you think about when they were talking about those you remember those uh remember those two guys those three guys that went down to

Mississippi to register voters and everything remember they started draining those swamps they started pulling and they would find bodies are like that's not them that's not them that's not them after like the fifth or sixth body they're like wait a minute we haven't even found the ones that we're looking for who the fuck are these guys what kind of shit is going on in that place you know and that's that's kind of that's what's out there man you got to be aware of that kind of thing and it's it's um it's terrifying when you think about it but it's also it's also incredibly exciting man it makes for

great stories you know I was telling Lee that I went over there Sunday yeah to watch the Radio City Music Rockets dog and I passed out I put the 3d glasses on I saw the fucking Santa Claus in front of me and some reindeer and next you know they were waking me up what happened to you what was going on I just was tired I don't know what the fuck knows man I'm 55 years old yeah it's a six hour flight I was on the road before that three weeks in a row you know you're thinking you're talking to people you're doing podcasts yeah you have a family you have a lot on your fucking play mentally yeah and I guess I just sat there but I

also slept on the plane for two hours but that's not a real sleep right that's not a real that's right I don't fall asleep on planes so we had to leave on the way out we had to get up at 3 in the morning so 3 in the fucking morning you get to the airport it was 5 we got to Newark at 2 we drove to the hotel it's 3 at 4 30 yeah we sat in the hotel till 6 30 and went out to dinner and then I went back to the room and obviously you can't fall back to sleep the first night you're still on California time yeah so I didn't fall asleep till fucking 3 in the fucking morning and they're yelling and screaming as you know my wife goes

to bed at 8 30 every night so she could go to bed at 11 over there I was falling asleep at 3 and then they're walking around at 6 30 we're ready to go so that's what happened you know and a lot of running and it's a different lifestyle I believe it I didn't rent a car because I don't know where I'm going I hate renting a car even though yeah Joey you're from there you know what that was 30 years ago and that's what I don't know about I make a left turn I'm in fucking Schenectady yeah I don't know what the fuck I'm going nothing you make a left turn now my neighbor you're in Schenectady bro I don't know what the

fuck I'm driving I don't know nothing so I'm Uber into debt you know I had every fucking nationality on Monday name it Armenian I'm Czechoslovakian I had every because I caught six fucking Ubers plus two cabs that day just to move around the city the one fucking day I was wiped out like you going on vacate there's people who could go on vacation yeah and there's people will cut out the wrong vacation I'm one of those people I'm not cut out the wrong vacation so I get you you don't on vacation is to me you want to go on vacation on vacation there's a beach something I got I don't have to walk a

lot mm-hmm there's one thing at Netflix and I got an outdoor patio I get vitamin type mm-hmm maybe a fucking chapter yeah that's a vacation to me I don't want to say nothing but I'm with my wife mm-hmm it's not about me it's about them yeah I went to the Metropolitan Museum of Art which was fascinating as fuck I saw the Armenian the wing the Armenian Genocide Wing yeah they have an Armenian wing that they had a Chinese one yeah which is very interesting that's what my door out there yeah it's a three-day pass yeah but you need three days to walk in there you do you walk in there for three days you lose five pounds yeah you stay

away from the pretzels on the fucking hot dog by the way a pretzel six dollars six dollars to fucking tea carbon monoxide yeah and have some fucking foreign to touch it with them how much was when you were buying it fucking dollar 50 cents everything man six dollars for a pretzel down there by the ice-gating how much are cigarette cigarettes my mom was saying that they're cheap here no idea like how crazy is it there I know I know when I was shooting low on all the SVU yeah which had to be 2008 yeah I shot downtown mm-hmm and I went into a store with a $20 bill and I got a pack of cigarettes and a snapper and they gave

me back $3 and I shit my pants so you do the math yeah let's say the snapper was 250 maybe 250 yeah yeah packs of cigarettes the fuck because when my brother comes out he takes back ten cartons too he takes back ten cartons because it's a it's a lot fucking cheaper well you gotta buy them here you gotta do that you can't you know you can't pass up a deal like that I mean shit what is it is it is it the base cost or is it all the fucking taxes where they're trying to push people out of it yeah yeah well you know you watching good movies this year there's been shit lately it's been a really bad was it

just black you know what I thought Black Panther was overrated I thought it was okay I didn't love it that Green Book movie was alright that Mark Wahlberg movie was just like the Mark Wahlberg the Mark Wahlberg movie where they adopt where he and Rose Byrne adopted a couple of Mexican kids and it was cute but they tried to be funny and Wahlberg isn't funny he's even in a funny movie he's the straight guy he ain't the funny one you know so they were going for these jokes that just weren't gonna work and if you make it a drama boom you got a good film there you know but don't try to for me it's like when you start trying

to push the laugh and you try to make them you know the connected it fucking doesn't work man Creed 2 was was better than the original but that wasn't any good I mean I've just been everything I do wasn't any good I just wasn't impressed by it Mary Poppins is getting horrible reviews because it's opened up at 4.7 million dollars that's it that's it because the New York Times gunned it down I just saw the preview isn't it sort of like more kind of too modern isn't it looks like an action movie almost to me I don't know I mean it's they're doing a lot for the other fucking tortured for four point you make that one

that's a they also released it on fucking Wednesday yeah so they got a little cocky everybody's busy with school and functions and Christmas parties you know what they can wait those Saturday so there's also the fact that movies are costing anywhere from 12 to 16 dollars per going and it's like that's a family movie so you got to pay for you you got to pay for your two kids you got to get them something to drink I nobody wants to do that shit anymore it's costing too much do you have you saw movie pass no because movie pass tanked it was getting to the point where nothing nothing I wanted to go see

was available to me you know so every once in a while I got a AMC where you get three movies a week and I'll do that from time to time but you know part of the great thing about movie pass was it it I could go to the fucking revivals man I could see I could see the classics at the Egyptian or the Beverly or the the arrow I love this town for that and I can't do it anymore so it's like plus hang on no fucking money for that so it's like I've really been going back to you know watching old shit on Netflix and Hulu and you know like this come in week I'm gonna be at my mom and dad's house I ain't gonna be doing shit all I'm

gonna be doing is writing and taking my mom to the movies and watching Netflix I'm gonna watch all on articles I'm gonna watch I'm gonna watch whatever that new Michael Douglas Alan arc out of Alan arc and thing is I'm gonna watch that I'm just gonna knock out as much shit as I can do because you know come the new year I gotta get out there and start trying to get some production work that's what I'm trying to do you know get get behind the camera do that do the extra work go out on auditions and then go back to do and stand up at night I'm I'm pushing it hard this year I'm not fucking laying down that the whole

purpose of it now is not to not to get a regular job not to do any of that shit just pick up work wherever I can do it and and keep pushing the podcast because thinking in shape to work on a fucking set are you fucking crazy Rick Ramos that's our job as a young man no more I ain't a young man anymore plus 24 year olds it don't stop on those sets I look at those kids when I was doing those Disney movies they weren't getting paid like I was getting on your day those guys weren't getting paid they committed six weeks of their lives to learn how to do meal work you know they lied to them with experience I didn't agree to it

I would never if that's my son or daughter my listen to me a second I don't mind you learning the value of a dollar and working like a meal but you can't work for free no I'm not gonna work for free but it's about that yeah but what what's the alternative I'm gonna go back to work on a regular job no no no no but but you know as well as I do that the $40 gigs aren't out there anymore the $50 gig not not like I see him every once in a while I got to go to Lancaster for a hundred sometimes 70 I might get a $60 gig every once in a while but for the most part that shit ain't out there like it once was you

remember fucking coyote Wednesday and Saturday you were making anywhere between 40 and 60 bucks on that then you would pick up to two on a Tuesday or a Thursday Casa Latina was going on you could do that you can every lie comic mm-hmm had a fucking side room in those exactly and they all paint anything from 50 to $100 bill mm-hmm and I didn't know how much money on what you don't know what you got to you lose yeah so when the economy crashed in 2008 I got straight off coke yeah but I was still broke I couldn't figure out why because all those little rooms had disappeared yeah I could you know before you moved

to Los Angeles people always tell you you can't make money and I'm gonna tell you something that's a lie because I made a living since day one mm-hmm I did that one room for Rudy for free the first time yeah and then I was into a Rudy in the Brave Bowl yeah and that was $40 two shows on the weekend that's 80 then he had the commerce casino that hundred casino so we had all these alternatives I was addicted to cocaine mm-hmm so all those hundreds I didn't see how much they value the house because I wasn't taking money out of the house yeah you know I'm saying like when I check comes in for a movie mm-hmm I

would work with Rogan I haven't get my own work that's the house's money yeah those little $50 Mexican gigs with my bread and butter you could live on those dog I was pulling down a buck on a quarter of a night yeah and once I got the longest yard Jesus I was getting 150 from those guys easy easy I was getting 150 150 150 150 I would make an eight nine hundred a week and 150s plus 15 from the store and main room from the store plus I thought you know the improv was giving you a little check from time to time plus the laugh that was here 25 35 dollars at the end of the week you're making money to stand

up you're not fucking driving a fucking Porsche but if you act correctly you could rent a room in a three bedroom house with two other comments smoke pot and fucking eat yeah and pay rent and you know have a decent car pay the insurance on it you could you have to keep your money low every move has to be very calculated yeah what am I really gonna get out of this move yeah you know yes it would be nice oh if I do this Rick Ramos has a room on Tuesday so that'll alleviate the gas price of me driving down there there's all these plans that you have to include in all that shit you know I'm saying so but

going back to the the movies I'd watch what's on a plane yeah the only time I watch a movie is on a plane it's so amazing how when something comes on in my house if I try to watch it now with a baby and a wife I miss 50% of what's going on so the only time I can watch something is on a plane and my two favorite movies of the year were American made with Tom Cruise you know the Tom Cruise friend you know I would join Scientology for Tom Cruise but I technically have beaten for two hours just to hang out with Tom Cruise you know what I'm saying tell me about the Scientology shit yeah fill me in I tell

you something there's something about that guy that is captivating and you really want to watch him I don't give him lean out of the caprio that's why they make 20 million a fucking film because you're gonna pay to watch them and keep your eyes off them before we get into this movie we're talking about this movie thing I was I called Rick yesterday and I called I called anybody who I've known the last 10 days who's a Mexican American and I've discussed yeah this narcos series with that primarily for two reasons the two reasons were how good it was written and how fucking good Diego Luna is yeah and primarily because

yes I was fortunate enough to watch the French connection and I was fortunate enough as a kid to to watch fucking you know the velocity papers and and you know all those movies of the 70s the child but through all that time I always stayed loyal to Spanish television yeah and there was something about Spanish actors that kept captivating mm-hmm I became a comic I went to prison whatever I became a dad I have a podcast with Lee I talked to people I get lost you get lost you lose yourself but then something happened on the way to dance I watched a movie called man on fire yeah and while it was Denzel's greatest performance I

know you people are bored of hearing this no absolutely I saw something in that movie that would made that movie special was a Denzel and it wasn't no disrespect to Jennifer Lopez's husband Mark Anthony it was those Mexicans around him yeah those Spanish actors around him including who's not a Mexican American actor Giancarlo Giannini mm-hmm who was also well he's that Italian actor from uh oh god he did some great work in the 70s and 80s but he also did that movie with the second Hannibal he played the copy and I fell in love with him that his face his character how he would smoke a cigarette his mannerisms in

in fucking in fucking man on fire when he walks into the hospital room mm-hmm and he this is my favorite hospital because it has his bakery across the street and he has a childish smirk on his face after Denzel gets shot and the lieutenant is making the statement who's also a brilliant actor yeah listen to his Spanish how he performs it then the Mexican white chick who's married to a big-time director who played the reporter yeah he's sitting there taking notes and he comes up from behind there and squeezes her ass and he says something to her and he gets a childish smile to him that's when I knew that guy was the

real deal yeah Denzel had his hands full in this movie yeah he was opposite Christopher Walken mm-hmm but when towards the end that guy on the phone with him yeah was brilliant the guy that he cut his arm off yeah I was walking around with mongo on he was brilliant that guy got hit by a car yeah that guy got beat up by Denzel he never tapped out yeah then Denzel shot his arm off he showed up to his brother remember when he ran yeah he was running with that little ganky arm and shit hysterical hysterical phenomenal actor the actors he handed himself over to phenomenal Spanish actors and I started thinking about

how and you never heard me come out with this I'm sick and fucking tired of the fucking Mexican-American actors they shut down our throat anymore they're boring that little click they have in Hollywood is boring they're fucking boring and it starts with James almost I'm sorry to announce it he's the king of bore me he bore me to fucking death anymore especially after I saw all these Mexican-American actors yeah that a fucking their face is a rich with culture mm-hmm the fucking fat chick that he breaks down no say I need ya that lady should have gotten the Academy Awards for dealing opposite Denzel with his

shotgun go watch that scene how good that fat lady is we know we don't know that's the thing we don't say no say it's gonna say everybody eat the milky Mickey Rourke was in that nobody remembers the lawyer but it's an Academy Award winning movie all the way around and never got recognized by the girl the oh yeah little girl yeah it's just tremendous but I noticed the Spanish acting yeah so now we we fast forward to fucking 2016 whatever it also narcos comes out yeah and I'm sitting there I'm captivated this is a man that is worse than Tony Soprano Tony Soprano the character made you fall in love with

him women love to watch him even though he cheated on his wife we had charisma he had charisma nobody like some charm yeah Pablo Escobar this guy that played Pablo Escobar mm-hmm was the he's the worst animal in the world he cheats on his wife he shoots people blow more plot that may yamal Pablo Escobar gave media and I make deals for a living blow more or plot the guy opens up the side door and he goes and they walk up to the guy and in the beginning that's how he opens up the movie when he tells the guy what his name is and what his wife's name is and his mother just got out of the hospital the guy is brilliant

nobody said a fucking peep about him not a peep who was said about that performance and I tell people all the time you got a problem with narcos you watch episode 9 as Lakate draw mm-hmm when he beats the guy up with the stick and the guy spits in his face and the spit goes into his nose and as he's breathing the spit comes out of his fucking nose and the blood he's got shaking and then he goes up to a guy and he says goodbye he turns his back and he's covered with blood when he goes out he doesn't say a word mm-hmm and he's looking over everybody else's party and fucking suck and snot blow yeah he looks

on to the sunset he takes a deep breath and then the camera pans out and it shows a pop plant taller than him by itself blowing in the wind what a beautiful director's eye yeah it shows the camera pull back and then him being him he looks to the fucking right hand side and he notices the pop plant and doesn't get scared of it he remembers his face is telling me oh that's right he takes the pop plant he pulls it to his face and he snips it really hard and then he left and he takes the butt off and he puts on the top of his pocket he walks back into the house he didn't say a word mm-hmm he didn't have to I read

what he was thinking in his mind right there I knew this guy's a fucking powerhouse he did two seasons mm-hmm then season three is the New York Collie Cartel great acting they ate it up mm-hmm but nobody has blown my socks off like Diego Luna Diego Luna has taken it to a different now I grew up on Spanish soap opera yeah which I know one thing the acting is very timed they had some fucking teacher over there in Cuba I heard that was better than Stanislaw and they shut him down but I heard that he trained Spanish cast and those people came up they were the early Telemundo actors and they were brilliant that

they're Spanish their timing and when I started watching Cara Cole entertainment shows all their shows a shot on film to look like a movie yeah but the birth place is telling novellas they and that's why some people like my wife doesn't like them hmm my wife or what my wife first of all if you're white it's very what rough to watch narcos because you're reading sometimes yeah you can't get high you have to focus you have to focus and watch it what are they saying and then yeah they fill you in the white guy speaks in English and fills you in but 60% of it is so I understand you can't watch it but if you have not watched

more narcos Mexico Cara Cole entertainment put out Celia Cruz which was brilliant they also put out jota jota which is brilliant the acting again is men's amortem but you can see that all these guys are classically trained narcos this one the character Rafa and the character Miguel Jose the leader two were the best character performances I've ever seen in my life and I go down with Ramon and Brando to the end yeah these guys knocked it out of the park the one guy plays a conservative mob boss he weighs 155 pounds but when he walks in the room he's 280 yeah that's what I got from narcos and to the other

guy plays a psychopath who in reality is a genius he's such a genius that he figured out how to grow marijuana in the desert he figured out how to take the male plant away and pollination and he figured out how to invent the weed that's we call since a media that was his gift to society he invented that he he was a geologist he dug and he would dig and then throw grenades in and then he finally throws the whole box of grenades in a one grenade and they're standing and also water shoots out and that was the beginning of the end you know I mean the whole series he's nuts nuts to the point of wow you know and

they're fucking Mexican hillbillies but this other kid I watched him I watched the series three times yeah I watched it twice when it came out and then I retaped him for the flight it's five hours each way so I can watch five episodes so I watched five on the way there and five on the way back and then I looked them up and everything I knew everything I saw was true his mother died in a car accident when he was two and he was raised by his father was a set designer of a theater in Mexico City so he grew up in the theater yeah he started and fucking novellas just like I read yeah just that acting that

precision that at the end he thinks back to the conversation he had with geeky Camarena and the scene between him and that Mexican kid that's done a thousand movies yeah was brilliant his reactions his emotions when the Mexican kid says to him you fucked up man geeky Camarena says it's all you fucked up brilliant they were both brilliant but this Diego Luna guy just sensational just sensational you know you tell me why I watched three or four episodes of the minds yeah it lost me and guess what it was the same the same yeah the father I don't want to see that guy ever again it's the same fucking story it's the

same thing and it's like it's the same faces and but it doesn't have the balls to go as far I don't know the Mayans from what I've heard it's just just they're not gonna take it as far as it needs to go they're not gonna be as as crazy with it you know even the guys that they get for the biker gang are a little bit more clean cut than than the real I was like three or four episodes and it didn't grab me and I thought back to what I'm telling you man on fire what I saw and what I remembered when I was a kid I had a couple of babysitters was my favorite babysitter was Mungito and Latina Latina was a Cuban Chinese woman

who was dear friends of my mother and her husband was Mungito when I was five or six at night I would go upstairs and they would watch all those novellas no they were Mungito but Mungito was a burglar and he used to take those sparkly you ever you ever gap a spark plug yeah you know you have to take like a file and put them in well he could you get the thickest one of those files and he would make fake keys so at night while we'd be watching novellas he would be like a when you go to a fucking place to make a key that whole thing they do at the hardware store he would have those in his living room and he would just be

making copies and we would eat vanilla cookies vanilla wafers dip them in orange soda and I could stay up till two in the morning while he made keys he taught me how to make them I'd be sanding them down a little grinder and shit hysterical but from hanging out with him all those years I watched novellas and it's amazing what your life I like I love television and film yeah I look listen I got off in two movies this year both of them had to go on the plane for 10 hours it's dead for me it's dead like I got those TV shows but I knew people you know I knew I knew Greg thank you I thank them for put me in

the show and let me suck a black guy's dick on camera his shit you know very fortunate that you hear 20 years and you make friends TV people but I don't go out like I used to I get pissed I get pissed I know I'm missing roles you know what am I gonna do you think that at one point no matter what's going on that people nothing nothing and it's I'm okay with it I'm okay with it I'm too busy anyway and at the time I feel like it's an inconvenience I gotta wardrobe now and do this for three days so after time I'm happy I want to do shit that I wanna know I get that I mean you get to a point where it's like I don't want to

do the same shit good it's weird in the beginning it's like in the beginning of stand-up you're like I don't give a shit where I gotta go I'm gonna go do it then then it comes to a point was like fucking Riverside they gotta pay me if I'm gonna drive to Riverside they gotta pay me and then it's like well shit they got 40 bucks for me maybe a sandwich and that's cool after you've been doing it for a while now it's like come up with a hundred come up with a fucking bill to make this worthwhile for this drive so I can go in there do the fucking jokes and then come right back you know but you start to lose perspective on what you

once were versus what you need in those early days you'll you'll bust your ass for nothing I did because that's what you got to do I did I did all that shit yeah I did a lot of shit that I should have done that lady is learned I realized Jesus Christ they could have paid me $20 yeah they charge this at the door they did this they did that you know they could have but you use it as experience you use it as experience and you know what you survive it you know because there were a lot of times where they didn't pay me shit and they were giving me free drinks well I was gonna make more regret that I was like just

give me the 40 bucks I'm gonna drink $60 worth of fucking alcohol oh yeah well they have a fucking myself comic and they give you free drinks and you get $20 worth of coke yeah and you get free drinks you're as happy yeah as a pig and shit yeah and you tip the bartender $10 bills at least you show me a little bit of class yeah exactly oh my god and you get fucked up you close those places yeah as a comic I closed a thousand those fucking bars when you get the bartender at 20 you drink all night for free shots shots for your friends shots for your grandmother you like shots brother one more come on

it's fucking crazy but those those are the those are the early days that's when you were a kid and you yeah you get fucked up and I would drive I wouldn't drive I would say I wouldn't drink and drive I would drink at the comedy store at the end of the night mm-hmm but in between those rooms it's tough for me I'm one of those guys I won't drink and drive I've recently even stopped smoking and driving really I can't see at night no I mean you gotta you gotta recognize these limitations you know I smoke a little bit if somebody's smoking in the back mm-hmm I'll go back there somebody gives me a blunt or something

I smoke and pass it on and but it's really weird that no at night two three hours before I gotta go out I don't smoke no more I just get ready once I get home leave those once I get home for the comedy store yeah I feel bad for my pipe I fucking melt that they're giggly I make a fucking baloney and cheese sandwiches shit and I'm happy as fuck I start sending emails I read my emails yeah I torture people people who call me like a seven in the morning I wait till three that time and I text them just like a fucking picture of me playing baseball or something they go bananas so why'd you seven this morning why'd you call me at

seven but no I was just thinking about that people gonna be home next week and everybody always looks for recommendations me I'm an old-school type of guy I don't know nothing about nothing but I do know some good movies mm-hmm I told you what's up well before like before you tell us then on the list are they do you have like emotional connections to them these films because like especially during this time like if I felt like I was if I feel a lot I'll watch something that maybe I've seen it a bunch but it's like it brings me back to a happier time or I really love the actor like most like what you guys were

saying like are they like you're just like the best movies or maybe a mix there are moments when like you connect with certain things and then movies movies have this weird kind of power over you if you're a movie guy if you dig movies there are moments when you can talk there are moments when I'm hanging out with somebody and we can just quote something between each other we're laughing our asses off I don't know if you remember this but you were doing grudge match and I was working some shit job one of the many and I you called me up and you said that you had met DeNiro that day and he was sitting there and I

think you made him laugh or something he laughed and you said it looked like midnight run when he was when he was like you know you know there's a better class of people around here you know probably all the best was doing he did that laugh and instantly you and I were connected at that moment because I remember that scene and we were both like little kids just laughing because you're working with one of the greats you're working with with a hero with I mean regardless of whatever whatever the movies became or whatever he's you know he did he was still Travis Bickle he was still Jake Lamar he was still John you

know Jack Walsh he was still that guy you know and and movie people have that connection so it's like we're always gonna be able to do that you know the movies that you're talking about on your list they stick with you for a reason because you remember maybe it gave you balls or something see and when I saw Wesley Snipes for the first time I think it was some Spike Lee movie but then I saw him in New Jack and I was like this is a bad motherfucker this guy's no joke and then you see the level of class that's in Sugar Hill and I haven't seen Sugar Hill in years. Well Sugar Hill was on the list because I forgot Sugar Hill

yeah and I woke up mm-hmm the other day in New York City yeah and it was cold we weren't gonna do anything till one she wanted to stay in play and Sugar Hill had just started mm-hmm and I turned it on I saw remember how disturbing it was to me yeah the black girl from News Radio candy Alexander and the Alexander plays the mother and it's a scene where she makes her kids hold the belt while she shoots her and then she overdoses Jesus oh yeah a heavy movie and and Wesley Snipes was fucking phenomenal yeah I mean he was phenomenal in New Jack City mm-hmm but he was phenomenal in this but opposite him yeah was a black

young black African-American kid the name was Leon right skinny kid you know what his name is he was phenomenal and he did an episode of Miami Vice mm-hmm where he plays a guy that was killing hookers in Vietnam mm-hmm but he never stopped killing hookers or all around the world geez and then he went to Miami and he was killing hookers in Miami and they had to arrest him and even in that episode he was fucking brilliant yeah I never seen him in a lot I saw him in maybe three things he was also no I'd like to say he was the black Jesus in Madonna's video of yeah I think his name was Leon no no I don't think he was that guy that was a

different looking guy but this guy that played his brother in sugar hill mm-hmm is a phenomenal fucking actor you ask yourself what happened to these people though you know it's like did they slip to the cracks was the career not what it once was the attitude getting getting the way did drugs get in the way what the fuck happened to half of these people you know with actors you never really know because that's a New York City movie mm-hmm and in New York City you have so many things going on yeah so what you have is okay so you have like Leon the chassos and what's the guy that created Miami Vice oh my command no no but who

was really like oh the Spanish actor barbanc no the guy that's fucking wrote prisons he went to fucking prison I remember that guy he did um and he wrote a fucking play with angelized didn't he oh oh yeah rock Cuba and the take care Anthony you're correct no I want you to look up uh he she wrote a script and it became a movie and then they turned it into a play mm-hmm and then they wrote Ralph Marchio I was called Cuba and his teddy bear Cuba and his teddy bear yeah but uh you know but no narrow with that Miguel Panero Miguel Panero yeah Miguel Panero yeah okay so what you have to remember is in New York City you have these little stage companies yeah some of them are Puerto Rican yeah some of them are

all Spanish some of them are African-American acting little things that they developed themselves they're non-profit they fund them themselves they live off donations when they charge you the door selling bottles of water they keep the lights on they rehearse four nights a week they teach acting classes they do workshops these guys hustle at the same time they write and they fucking act you know plus you have Broadway and you have off Broadway and you have off off Broadway those guys in New York disappear and they come back let's take for example law and order in the middle of law and order there was a fat Italian cop and they would always tell them what to do in the room yeah and he would always come back and go hey the guns checked out and then he would disappear well he

disappeared for fucking 10 years then he came back as Gigi and the Sopranos yeah he's the one that was taking a shit on Thanksgiving and died on the ball okay he disappeared for 10 years for a while we were being managed by the same manager yeah and I asked him what he was doing he goes he does tons of theater yeah he goes from one theater to another to another to another so just because you don't see those people no it doesn't mean that doesn't mean that work what's that guy that you worked with on a longest yard the pyro um he was huge he was huge Walter Hill guy um he played while you're while you're what David David have a good guy very decent great actor same thing but that's a guy that boom so out there do a play come back make a movie get paid really well

to go fund the stuff that you want to do he went to karate every day was a black belt he went to karate five days a week David Patrick Kelly that's right I lost contact with him I left his agent a call like a year and a half ago he never fucking called me back so but he went he went to a couple my shows in New York we stayed friends for a while after that he sent me his music and I lost his number we lost contact and that happens it's it's weird but but would you you know I just saw him on a tv show and he always told me he would never do tv but this is what happens but this is where we're at now though this is where you're at but it's also like tv ain't what tv was tv's respectable now and in fact you're gonna find better stuff on tv whether it's hulu netflix or amazon prime

that you can then you're gonna see on network that work as shit that work as shit network as shit there's nothing on network right now the problem that you have is it's there's too much entertainment yeah we can't catch up with what we got yeah so a lot of shit is slipping through our fingers we tried different shows yeah we tried different shows not everything's gonna work for everybody yeah but we we get so much original programming that we're in a point right now where it's too much even a fat guy who stays home all day who is on disability fat guys with 600 pound man oh yeah they'll tell you dog there's too much there's too much you can't sit here all day I can't catch up well people ask me people ask me all the time it's like are you watching that I was

like when am I gonna have time for that when do you have time when do I got time for that you know and to dedicate myself to a series and it's like and sometimes you find yourself watching something like The Walking Dead and I'm like this isn't even good anymore I gotta get off this shit because it's not you know for that one moment of magic where it all comes together and it makes sense and it's great and I gotta sit through I gotta slog through fucking three four episodes you know an hour a piece just to get to that one moment I just watched I can't stand it a terrible show on Netflix I gave it three episodes what was it the one about the rizunos and Montreal oh I saw something like that yeah terrible just got off let's get to the movies here let's do it so you

asked about emotion rounders rounders is a movie with Matt Damon and Horton and the chick that fuck Harvey Weinstein a little blonde that got cut out of Donny Brasco she's a Donny Brasco with no lines she didn't suck no dick then she came back strong for fucking rounders they gave her a fucking she was a she was number two she was Matt Damon's girlfriend real cute blonde yeah okay rounders is about a guy that's trying to get his life together he's very intelligent off the charts intelligent you know so around is Lee oh thanks that's good and there's the guy that plays what's the really good actor that plays Ed Norton no oh Malkovich or tutorial the guy that plays the Jewish professor that tells him about the jesheva oh it's Landau Martin Landau yeah that's one of the

later Landau he didn't want to be in the part of a jesheva this family this owned him and fucking tremendous speech he gives me it's about a poker player that's it it's just a great poker player what's great about that is that you get these stories that are real oh my god Lenny Clark was in it oh yeah yeah Lenny Malkovich was brilliant Malkovich was great I fucked you like last time he just played a fucking tremendous Russian so if you haven't seen rounders it's time to watch rounders uh Rick and I were talking about Sugar Hill just a great movie about uh two brothers who grew up in uh in uh Harlem and they connected to the mob and they saw heroin for the mob and great actors the dad is the black guy Link from Williams uh Ava Gota Ava Gota gangster yeah

great actors in that movie if you haven't seen it bullets over Broadway is one of my fucking favorite movies of all time you're gonna laugh cry you got chance commentary as the gangster who is one of the best gangsters ever in that movie top five yeah Dan Weist is great in it was and over as that over anxious actress who was like no stop stop I can't I can't don't look like that all those all the fat guy from fucking yeah uh that was Sean Penn's name that he got him into uh that he played jelly jolly yeah jovi telly jovi telly jovi telly's in that I mean it is just a fucking movie that is and jovi who's jovi telly's girlfriend in that it was uh it was Jennifer telly Jennifer telly give him the hooch give it Marla give her the good stuff this is a brilliant

film yeah if you could find it hit me up on twitter it's crazy because they play the only time I've ever seen it no it's Woody Allen it's Woody Allen it's Woody Allen the only time that I've ever seen it before the molestation charges uh yeah but after Sunni yeah you know so so he was already he was already doing that shit yeah he was already that movie was good that was great I'm gonna give you that priest Sunni pussy he was getting that young flower yin yin juice that see that's one of the great things about LA is like you can't find that on video I think yin yin juice yeah you can find that anywhere I gotta check on Lancashon to give you yin yin juice by the glass you take it home and drink it I saw that in a theater I saw that over at the at the LACMA

Bullets old brother yeah they show it they show like uh they got like a Tuesday one o'clock matinee thing four dollars I would go over that would just drop my forehead go in there and watch over yeah they do they're doing eyes wide shut sometime this week and the shining I think they're doing some crazy shit and I would go down there and I would love it for fucking dollars is it back no no it's it's like a huge theater that's a disappointment if you live in a city of students yeah you're supposed to be a student when you live here yeah so a movie like that when you could see it on the big screen why you don't really understand things it's always a great thing to visualize and watch you can see how much the directing has changed yeah uh Bullets old we

Broadway was entertaining another one that I haven't seen in years that I fucking love Matthew Brother again his Biloxi Blues him and Christopher Walken's great in it Christopher Walken is so good in it that the fucking skinny Jewish kid that wants to be a writer yeah Epstein with the glasses yeah oh my god you forgot you remember his name Epstein is great with the skinny glasses just like Lee yeah wine throughout the whole fucking movie they can't tell if it's gonna be yeah yeah it's gonna be hot in here yeah it was always something with him no it's Mississippi remember he wouldn't eat he gave the letter to Christopher Walken at the Food Wars in Kosher yeah or some shit he couldn't eat and Christopher Walken ripped it up or that was Matthew Broderick let's say

it was uh something day and he couldn't eat it because of religious purposes and all this shit if you haven't seen Biloxi Blues it's a lot of fun I remember seeing that in the theater it's a lot me too it was great 87 86 that it was brilliant I still had the movie thing I'm like oh I wanted a date yeah I'm like uh make a mistake it was like that fucking joke Chris McGuire had years ago they wanted a date with a girl to see Bridges of Madison County he goes how bad could it be it's a Clint Eastwood movie all of a sudden 10 minutes in he noticed Clint didn't have a gun it's gonna be no payoff in this shank you know whoa whoa whoa what's this I thought this was a Clint Eastwood movie how come he doesn't have a gun he's taking out a camera what the fuck is this fuck Clint you

fucked me I want my money back like he had a whole bit about it I can't see without my fucking glasses I'm blind yeah I'm teasing the movies I'm also in the I'm also for some reason in the mood to watch the regular apocalypse now the original before the before the redux yeah without that I've been I've been I haven't at the house on DVD but I think it's the redux I'm not in the mood for it well if you got the if you got the original it has both versions right so you you just have to find the other you have to find the other disc I'm not in the mood for the redux I hope I'm not insulting anybody I'm just not in the mood for the fucking French and whatever else they have dinner with and all that shit that makes me uncomfortable believe it or not I'm in the mood

to watch Gotti the 98 one if you can find it it's on HBO it's on no it's on YouTube for sure okay the unedited version is on YouTube and it's gotta be on HBO plus well if it's on HBO plus it did really well at our HP yeah so I know for a fact if you look at HBO movies like in those the HBO did that one and the one about AIDS with rich angels angels in america no the one before that with Richard gear and fucking when he played the the playwright and they told me he had to have and he donated his money really I don't remember that one I remember the one with uh Meryl Streep I remember the one with Pacino where he played Ray Kohn Ray Kohn that piece of shit so it was like wow yeah another movie and the band played oh and the band played on yeah that's a brilliant

film yeah I'm gonna see that again another movie I'm in the I'm gonna film him in the mood to watch is the french connection you know it's just great you know what Hackman is such a piece of shit in that movie isn't he he's just such a fucking lowlife scumbag but it's like you want him doing the job when he goes in there and he when he goes into that black bar and starts calling people niggers and just like slapping people around you're like yeah he puts his hand under a bar yeah and he takes all the drugs are you sure there's no drugs here nothing okay and he fucking takes all the bar and he puts them on a drink on the bar he takes all the pills yeah then he makes a drink with them doesn't he make somebody drink it yeah yeah he makes somebody

drink it hello Popeye's here that was such a great film yeah I remember the excitement of the trailer yeah as a child like because they used words they said filmed in New York where it happened yeah that was the trailer and the trailer was the guy running up the stairs we shoot him in the back he shot shoots him in the back for some reason I've been in the mood for the french connection for the last year and you sit there and you go you know what it's gonna pop up on HBO like HBO's been surprised and we're like like last week I didn't feel too good yeah I just didn't feel good I said I went on there after La Jolla I went on there the flu stuff to T flu oh yeah to stave it off the shit the doctors give you is it the four pills or the five days over seven

two or five yeah ten pills I do that shit yeah so I went on that and I just didn't feel like doing anything and it was like God fucking showed up 11 a.m man on fire on HBO East or something like that I just wrote out 10 30 on I watched the SPN some football scores and I watched Man on Fire and laid that cuddled that's a gift from God yeah so I just sit there at night I'm like the other day was on and I still watched it yeah I didn't care uh you know what I taped the other night too that was on the other one that was fucking brilliant Harlem nights yeah what I got I got really drunk one night and this is what I knew I was like I gotta stop I can't drink anymore I just can't drink anymore but I got drunk I watched Harlem nights I called a buddy in North Carolina I was all

fucked up but I was laughing my ass off at Delores and Red Fox and I'm just sitting there screaming because it's fucking great when you watch it really really is a great movie like shut up bitch you know she's a real sweet you should be shot in the foot all that shit is brilliant oh it's fucking great you're watching it it's like that was Murphy when he was at this where you remember when Murphy dropped there was nothing like it Murphy made it comics had to be kind of goofy and ugly Murphy was handsome and the coolest motherfucker in the room Murphy wasn't like any other comic Murphy made good choices yeah Murphy did something that a lot of people don't do that have the thing that could kill you in this town of choices yeah one bad choice we overlook it yeah

two or three bad choices you lose me you lose me you lose me when you go for after a role for the wrong reason as an actor I'm not talking about as a comic as a comic you don't lose out you don't you don't want me I go back on the road yeah as an actor you're a dedicated actor you know you could just make bad choices yeah look at look at uh Jack Hoonan from sons of Anakin you're making $750,000 an episode on television you want to become a movie star I get it yeah you know you can have the biggest show on tv and nobody gives a fuck about you yeah they give a fuck about Tom Cruise 20 million a weekend in the box office that's who they give a fuck about yeah when you try to push somebody as a publicist they'll tell you we don't want to talk to tv people

Kevin James ain't shit to us yeah you know something to us Tom Cruise you know something to us Jamie Foxx that's an interview they movie stars yeah it's like being the lightweight champion of the world and being the heavyweight champion of the world who gets more respect the heavyweight champion of the world it's the same thing so you're making $750,000 an episode people at home are going Joey what the fuck are you talking about yes the last year of sons of anarchy they shot 10 or 12 episodes he got that $750,000 12 times okay so do the math what he made the final season of sons of anarchy so I understand you want to make the jump to film but we cannot lose that income yeah once I get that rate that high it can't go backwards the only way it goes

backwards is if I fail completely and then try to come back and now I got to rebuild it yeah which if that's a bad role I never will so instead of him going to cAA who we jump ship with and go in a listen this is what I want to do I want a film career but let's make right choices let's make choices let's put me in an ensemble film first where I have to shine opposite somebody and I got to go in there and knock them dead this has been my plan but at the same time I'm developing something for you in Netflix for you not to lose any pocket change I'm a Jew I need that envelope every week you're a nice guy but bitch papa needs that money yeah you're going to work so what I would have done is before

sons of anarchy would have been done because at the end of the day jack's teller all I want to see him do is kill white people and fuck white dirty women that's all I want to see him do I don't want to play him I don't want to say I don't want to hear that English accent but we could if we're smart you and I could do a remake of the saint a little one the audience doesn't have to know it's the saint yeah they don't know who the fucking saint is give this guy his English accent and make him a killer of international fucking spies like every week he goes to a park bench and a fucking I sit next to him with a sandwich I get up he reads the sandwich he gets a note in there call a number he calls the number they tell him where he has

to kill the attache he goes to a warehouse he picks up his weaponry just like John just like turning it into a film yeah America needed that more than ever John Wick is being turned into a TV show yeah so John Wick 3 is coming out but the TV show is also coming out yeah I would have taken that kid and gotten 750,000 miles an episode shot 10 quick episodes and then would have agreed to scripts so during the offseason you're shooting those movies and you're building your movie career but you're not losing that 750 for 10 weeks that's 750 that's 7 million dollars for 10 weeks work I can't lose that I can't lose that like if I'm making that type of money I can't lose that yeah that's always gotta sustain no you're right but but think about the mentality and the egos of the

people that are in this business here you got a guy huge on TV and he goes off and makes the legend the city of Z or what he did three eight he did three disasters Papillon he should have had that one with Guy Ritchie which I enjoyed what was the guy I enjoyed because I'm an asshole the one the Robin Hood oh Jesus Christ yeah no Camelot or Arthur yeah yes so here's a guy that you know and he did three duds now he's coming out with a new one but it's something sombo film okay and it's him with three other guys I would read that script I would pay somebody big money and go break that script down to me so I leave here with an Academy Award and I made it even if it's not that John real film it's the mentality you got to go into that film with and then that

one comes another one I rather wait for the fastball yeah then try to hit a curveball well you got to pace yourself you got to do the right thing that's what I'm saying that's the thing this is why I am how I am with my road work I wait for fastballs I will sit in that pocket forever I just had an opportunity arise yesterday and I was going to force a hand I almost caught myself forcing a hand yeah and last night I broke it down in my hand that I don't need to force the hand yeah why am I going to kill myself I got this just and this going on this just doesn't make sense because it scares you though this means no I avoid drama and I go for the consistency yeah but you also said you're 55 now you've been through it you know you've seen you've seen your

mistakes and you've seen other people's absolutely that's not something you would have done years ago no I learned from watching a ton of people yeah I learned it's remember everything changes yeah if I was 55 with a girlfriend oh lordy I'd be on a bus across America with Lee doing fucking you name it oh yeah everything but cocaine viking and we'd be waking up Lee would wake up like Rafa and fucking narcos foaming at the mouth every morning you don't know what life is till you wake up and you have like a sticky foam around your mouth you look at the mirror while you're pissing and it's white you don't know if you got diabetes or the pills you ate the night before or the chick ate her ass two nights ago in the back of the club and it tasted

like asshole but you went with it anyway because you let your jerk off and come on the butt cheeks and it's fucking crazy yeah waking up with foam around your mouth that's when you're on the road yeah that's when you know Jesus Christ Jesus I'm on the road yeah so if that's these are all different things yeah I wouldn't think I'd still would control myself I would add Thursdays to my rotation and do the podcast around the bus mm-hmm why fuck around and take showers in hotels stop for two nights stay in the hotel put them on the other wings so he has to walk so after every time he has to eat somebody has to leave him in the walk and torture him tell us they follow this from the room so it's two hours they see civilization by the time he gets

there he's walking two miles but that's what I would do I can't do that if I had just a wife I could do Thursday Friday Saturday maybe two three weeks a month I got this little girl changes everything and it changes everything and the next two weeks she got no school nobody to watch it see that's why so it's me and my wife it's you and Terry and you guys are doing the thing and it's gotta get done and it's gotta get done you know so because she doesn't care she doesn't know who you are no she doesn't care who she doesn't care about podcast she doesn't know about the weekend you know that's kind of like I tell people listen I know you want to hang and you think yeah here's the deal I got a fucking five year old and she's gonna walk into the church

in a quarter after 12 yeah and she's gonna run in that living room and jump on top of me and she doesn't care how tired I am it's a fucking game a picture let's go to the park she wants her cartoons she wants the park yeah she wants you to redo all that shit give a fuck about you in Columbus last night you did two shows and that's when you see it doesn't matter so I have to look at things very selectively I gotta go to places every other year I do everything you know the podcast same thing when I hear to do 18 different podcasts a week and I don't need to be in your living room 10 times a fucking week I don't need to be in your living room I don't need to tweet all the time I don't need to we all

have our fucking you know and it's just weird to when you first come to LA you're a quarter back on the 20-yard line yeah that's exactly why I describe it try scoring a touchdown remember a touchdown is easy on the 50-yard line that those last 10 yards that's the danger zone that's the red zone you better get a guy that got that was a thief in his previous life and nothing leaves his hands or you gotta have a tank to run that guy through you don't have you're not well equipped you don't have a running back no you don't have no wide receivers and your blockers suck that's who you are when you first get that right and you're going up to number one defense the league which means you're gonna get sacked three out of four fucking times you say hike

for the whole fucking game you might throw the ball twice you might throw the ball twice and then you add 10 years to that now you move to the 20-yard line and you see the field a little better but at the same time you gotta keep doing your sets it's not just time no no it's it's you gotta be working on your craft even though the tv don't want your girls don't want you johnny bananas don't want you don't worry about none of that you just keep doing your sets because now even though everybody's on the 40-yard line because of credit you're on the 40-yard line because of talent well it's like I look at it and I look at it now and I was like I know a lot of guys that I started doing stand-up with that aren't doing it they're not really doing it anymore

they'll do it from time to time and they'll go up and I got a spot here and I'll do this and I fell into that place for a long time because you remember I was just I was lost you know but now I'm looking at things and I'm looking at people who work regular jobs and none of that shit stable I got a friend of mine I went to school with he left Chicago went to Pittsburgh he can't get a job on the regular because nobody wants to hire a guy his age to be a constant guy they want him to work a work an assignment for three months this work everywhere this is a thing called uber so this work everywhere yeah if the guy the night nobody doesn't get work there's a big misnomer in this country that I'm not getting work because I'm 50

I'm not getting work because I'm 40 if you want a job you get it you'll sell yourself in the room once you start going into a room with that attitude like what am I going to do a 55 no I know I know well this is the thing what I was but what I was saying was like I'm finally at the age to play the parts that I've always been I've always had that mentality I've always been music I listen to literature the films that I love I'm an old guy no no I'm gonna have to figure that out I'm gonna have to hit them up again once new year comes I had all have ever since you know they used to send me out and a lot Courtney yeah Courtney did um and I was I was getting call backs at the very least and then something wouldn't happen I could never close it you know

like they liked me but they didn't like me enough and um I used to think well you're you're too fat to play a regular guy and you're not fat enough to play a fat guy for TV you know but but like just fucking excuses stop making excuses get in there if you if you want to lean out stop eating work out be that guy that you need to be but I gotta get some money this is a character yeah a carry there's a character doesn't matter how big you are if I were to stay at 400 pounds I would have got 10 more roles in movies yeah you understand yeah I get you yeah it's it's really weird when you're a fat guy you're gonna commit to being a fat guy if you want to be uh Adam Sandler's buddy from Saturday Night Live Chris Farley go be it yeah but you have to stay fat because once

you lose that weight there goes that when nobody want what happened to the guy was going to shake the stomach and make funny faces exactly well I need to get healthy uh we'll call you yeah that's the problem with that rumble in the jungle yeah and most people who are fat one day go wait a second James Gandolfini died I'm taking the sleeve yeah I'm doing this diet you know the reason why I'm doing what I'm doing was Ralphie dying yeah he was overworked no exercised no rest for the wicked yeah smoking pot with people on the road bringing germs from all over from different fucking states mixing and matching your your your your bronchitis turns into a pneumonia yeah and it never goes away no it doesn't it doesn't that you can't control you know what I'm saying so I saw the value of

I freeze I lift weights I go to Jiu Jitsu you know I told Lee yesterday we went two days ago we went and did that the cardio class together but I go did you smell anything and he goes it did smell like Italian food I goes that was five days and no sweating when I went home I smelled that rash guard yeah and the odors I snuck from my back whatever the garlic ball it smelled like garlic bread it's my I was like what is happening you have no idea yeah that's five days of no sweating for Joey Diaz my body's so used to sweating every four five days a week I make myself sweat yeah sweat I want to do the push-ups to see the beads falling off my face that's how you stay young that is the fountain of youth yeah when you're old it's not plastic surgery no no no it's not

fucking the witch doctory it's not nothing no it's moving you're over 50 it's two days a week there's some lifting maybe two days a week of some walking yeah maybe take two kickboxing classes a lot of sleep a lot of sleep and a lot of water sleep it's just like crazy yeah I bought two of these today I went to the week store and drank two of these today you know a lot of water I don't think I drank a soda in New York I drank a fucking Yoohoo and my brother when I got there sometimes he got in those left me drinks for the room and bananas and shit like that but the whole time I was in New York I didn't eat anything so I ate oatmeal from the hotel that's the way that's the way you you change you remember you remember Weight Watchers changed us it changed the mentality

and even though I've gained a lot of weight back and I haven't been as focused as I once was that Weight Watchers point thing is still in my head where it's like is that beer really worth it that's not even that's not even my brand why am I gonna do that shit you know a couple weeks ago I looked at it I thought it was gonna be like 11 points it was five points and I could live with that yeah I always tell Lee that Weight Watchers is not a diet no it's a lifestyle and it'll take two weeks to get adjusted three weeks yeah or the fourth week and then once you go and they give you a medal and you're sitting around other fat people and you hear them whining yeah because the main thing about Weight Watchers is going to the meeting and seeing why you're fat you learn why

you're fat yeah all these excuses you hear the same ones you tell people exactly I'm gonna do a later listen to that and go well I went to a party and I had to drink wine no you didn't there was a dick there you could have sucked that you could have sucked that dick burn calories and gotten yum yum juice but you didn't you know you learn you look at people and discuss yeah you remember you and I used to go to one yeah and we went together for probably six months every sunday then we'd go in and out burger we had a system we'd split the fries and we'd have a single and it was no soda yeah but no diet coat yeah it was 50 15 points I remember that but there was a girl that sat behind this that she went to Weight Watchers for a social life and every week she would sit behind this

and gain a pound or two and swear to god I mean Lee swear to god that she didn't hear her action points and that she ran every day and I would look at her in pity because I would say to myself why do you keep coming here yeah you have gained weight every week and it would piss me off so much that it made my challenge become a challenge against hers yeah like I'm gonna beat this bitch because this can not go on I don't want to ever sound like this person that's what Weight Watchers do sometimes you have to see that though yes I mean that's why those meetings are important because you see people's excuses that were all yours I travel I you know I might have family in town I don't have the time I'm tired I work you know I can't there's a subway down the corner

from my house and you start looking at these people going I do not want to end up like this yeah and you realize that it's not a diet it's just a lifestyle change I went to eat gumbo today they gave you a couple rice I didn't touch the rice nice nice there was chicken and shrimp and sausage crab meat the fucking gumbo yeah that's a lifestyle change did I eat the brisket sandwich oh I inhaled that thing but there was fries I didn't touch the fries do you understand that's a live challenge lifestyle change I drank a diet coke I had no choice I you can't go to a barbecue joint or no water you look like a fucking asshole I didn't touch the sweet iced tea which I would have gotten two years ago there's just little adjustments little adjustments it's not a diet

nobody said that's why you're never gonna die but that's the thing you and I used to do that what we would do no I never I never went on Marilyn was the one God rest her soul that told me weight watches was the only diet yeah because Marilyn had tried the one where they oh she tried everything she tried everything she said it was garbage yeah and the Marilyn was the one that one night we were having a two hour drive and she wouldn't shut the fuck up and I remember that the biggest diet she ever went on was weight watches that she lost 80 pounds she put it back on a year or two later but she really like she just started dropping down yeah I could just start it go like Jesus now and she wasn't walking she said she would walk to the

bottom of the hill and back up the corner yeah I'm not even exercising Joey I'm just eating she found how to cheat the system yeah there's a way to cheat the system and you could cheat it and drop tons of weight yeah tons she would she dropped 80 pounds them and that's the first thing I said I called Rick one day they go Rick we gotta get our lives together we went in January yeah it was like January 10th to 14th I'll never forget on that scale that was 378 pounds I was 273 I think and I had not been on the scale like I would see a scale and avoid it like I only have to look at a scale yeah when I got on that scale my fat little heart broke like my fat little heart broke and I remember the toughest thing was the soda

that was the first thing that went yeah when she bought the the Diet Coke comb oh horrible oh it broke my heart I was looking to cheat and then the breakfast changed because you could have two pieces of toast bacon and two eggs yeah so in those days she'd make me an English muffin one egg and a piece of ham half a piece of ham was three points so I was basically an egg McMuffin for breakfast that was it but from those first three weeks I realized that I could survive that's what you learned first yeah once you eat it you go well I usually eat three egg McMuffins eat the one and forget about it yeah go out and do your thing and next thing you know you're like you know what I ain't hungry they teach you some great they teach you some great slow down your

eating because I eat like a fucking like a lot of the chair yeah it's it's it's over for me I'm just shoveling in like a fucking animal with no respect for nothing but then drinking more water but also once you get over that hump it's easy but don't lose perspective on it because that's what happened to me I was like oh well I'll eat this I can do this slowly a pound here two pounds there that's boom and that's what happens it's like so I'm doing it tomorrow and it's gonna be it's gonna be hard because I'm with my mom in sunday yeah I'm wearing in sunday I'm I kept 25 off for a year yeah that's pretty good that's pretty goddamn good yeah that is happy you know my blood pressure stable I get on get headaches anymore like I used to 309 316

if I could tell if I did something I get a headache if I wrestled or something I don't get those headaches sleep is important rest is important yeah you know like I said yesterday I ran into something that I could have turned into a muddy thing and I said you know what I'm gonna focus on one day off yeah and take it take the free flight it's business class in New York I looked it up it's 2400 dollars they're gonna pay just for the plane ticket I'm gonna go give them the attention they deserve and come back Saturday yeah I was gonna do all the the agent would bother me we should make this or I go you know why again this is how you burn yourself out yeah it's working smart and not when you are beginning comic you take whatever yeah as you move

up you have to start saying no and as you get into a different level you really have to start saying you know and picking and choosing and going well I could do this this week I could do this this week and looking at it and like I said I incorporate everything I got three movies left let's go all right because of Diego Luna I love them into my mouth I'm in that movie was I mean that movie was powerful all the way all the way through you know I haven't watched in a while that's on my Christmas list it threw me at the end but I was like whoa wait what the fuck is going on here but once I mean I was like wow this is just a great film this is just a great film I dig this film it's a it's him it's Gael Garcia Bernal who have you've seen him uh that guy's great too

yeah I think that's his partner in the yeah in the theater company they have out of Canada yeah they do some really good work I like I think that's Cuaron I think that's Alfonso Cuaron yeah those Mexicans are making some great films they're reviving a film industry that that has been dead since the late 60s man when they just started making cheapy cheap schlocky kind of Mexican wrestler movies or or or these really shitty drug dealer movies they're coming up with some really good shit because Mexico had a fucking great film industry back in the 40s into the 50s and then like anything else the American the American market just destroyed everything every every country in the world is primarily American American movies

almost no country maybe Hong Kong had some good shit from the 17th into the early 90s and India still has a vibrant film but yeah but France Germany Russia and all the South American and Central America none of these people really have film industries because people just want to see American films and it's these shitty like you know comic book movies the marvels the DC it's like this fucking this bulldozer that just destroys everything else that's in its wake you know what are you gonna do they got some good shit though another movie I want to watch I haven't seen in a long time and you always got to watch one brand-new movie yeah and it's on the waterfront I have not watched it in a while and it's weird because Lee asked if there's a connection

emotionally on that list that's the number one movie that connects with me because of the speech he tells his brother which one in the backseat of the car if you're a loser at that time of your life and you listen to that speech you feel uncomfortable for eight minutes after that if you don't have things right in your life yeah when he looks at his brother and he says he could have been a somebody and he could have been a contender he could have been somebody yeah you you're thinking to yourself I want to be somebody too here I am watching on the waterfront on a Friday night at nine o'clock when everybody else is getting that dick's like I'm sitting here with a Pittsburgh Steely shirt and I'm 50 years old I'm single I live in a basement I got a cat named Momo who's missing a leg

diabetes complication and then he comes on he plays the ultimate loser yeah and you just feel like a fucking asshole yeah and it takes me back to excuse me the first time I watched that and how I felt when he said those words you know that's what I'm talking about though there's that it's that there are sometimes when you're watching something on screen and you're like you can't hide from the truth you can't hide from how you have fucked your life up and you know there are times when I'm watching something and I'll say loser movies I've always been attracted to loser movies or guys you know that that are looking for that one last shot at redemption where they can fix it you know

when we we were talking on my show and we were talking about how I'm overwhelmed by old man movies and guys coming to the end of their lives saying I fucked up how am I gonna fix it you know the new eastwood movie is not great you saw it I saw it I saw it it's not great but there are moments in it where I'm like wow that I get that guy that's my dad that's me the old man in the gun I liked I liked it I thought I'd ask you about it I really liked it Danny Glover Danny Glover is is he delivers his great little performance Sissy's basic I've always loved always loved Sissy's basic you know she's always ever since coal miners daughter you know because I saw coal miners daughter before I saw Carrie and the movie she did with Mel Gibson

the river that's one of my favorite the river yeah but she's beautiful she's wonderful you know she's fucking gorgeous she's just she's I was curious to see how that Robert Redford I had a great time with it but it's a it's an old man movie you know it's like this is what I've done with my life I've made mistakes but I'm still I'm still hustling I'm still fighting and it's it's that's what's great about it I loved it to be Clint Eastwood's age and to do a movie about a guy that age yeah that has to smuggle to make ends meet to pay for prescriptions yeah to keep his wife alive was on a fucking machine I don't know the plot of the movie I don't know yeah that's a lot of it but it's not also it's it's also the thrill that he gets of being useful again and because his life

has gone to shit it's like my grandfather's 92 and every time every time I go home I think to myself this might very well be the last time I see him that goes to my mind every time and I think about it with my parents as well I think of more with my mom than I do with my dad but there's something about living your life and saying I've made some bad choices but I still have an opportunity to make this shit right and I want I want my mom at least to see me be even just moderately successful where she's not she's a mom she's gonna fucking worry about her little boy for the rest of her life you know she's I'm 44 she's 67 66 67 she could either have 20 years or she could have you know two or three I don't know what's gonna happen but it it it gets to me you know I don't

have a mother I know it's the holidays and I think of what success is as a parent and if your kid's breathing if your kid has an apartment and he has a job and he or she are handing themselves and they're not on drugs and they're not in a bad situation you did a good job as far as I'm concerned yeah success doesn't mean any at least not to me when I was 25 and 30 and 35 I thought yeah it would be nice to have a boat and two blondes and and show people there's nothing to show yeah it's forgiving yourself it's accepting yourself is it's it's it's success is accepting yourself oh yeah and not going to sell drugs and I'm not going to suck a dick and I'm not what if you were one of those women that fucked Harvey Weinstein and you won an academy award yeah did

you really earn an academy award were you telling well yes because by fucking them you opened up the door to get a position you know you still had to deliver you still have to deliver yeah and I think that's sometimes success the value because people don't know the pressure and the value of success and once you get there you're gonna say to yourself what was really successful yeah success is me being healthy me having a steady job me paying my bills and me having healthy relationships around me and the general word there is happy yeah that's success that's the equivalent success uh Demetrius does a kid that follows me on facebook he just went to Cuba and he goes I had a good time and I go to you look at their faces I want Americans every American

should go to Cuba and look at those people's faces and and think about when they complain that they need a new their iPhone cracked or that you know everybody we look at these things in our lives that have no value and then we add so much on success on showing people what we have and what we don't have at the end and when you're in a casket you're going to realize that success is number one being healthy yeah and number two is being happy if you're living in a shack on Sacramento street and you're reading and you're figuring you're going to wine your shower and you're figuring out how to make a living if you have a smile on your face when I come to visit you you that success yeah you know he says a line to him when he's when he goes into talk to he

the kiki camera and the Diego Lula goes can you imagine when I was poor I slept like a baby yeah now that I'm rich I don't fucking sleep you're worried about too much you know you always you everybody whether it's in comedy success in comedy or survive in 20 years tell me you did comedy for 20 years and you got nowhere and I'm gonna look at you and go no you didn't you did something for 20 years and nobody the cards didn't go your way and don't give up don't give up because the cards didn't go your way not for right now but if you stay at that table long enough and you keep your chips low yeah you keep them low you play the you know you keep them low and you start fucking calling and you keep the rhythm remember when and in rounders he figured out the

rhythm of the table yeah and he kept fucking with them and finally jumped out of it fuck you fuck you read his tell fuck you he read his tell see your opportunity you fucking seize it it's the same thing with poker this game that we're playing is staying at the table for the longest yeah how can I stay at the table for the longest am I gonna go all in on everything no you're gonna lose early uh you come to me and go I got a co-starring on ABC's grown men it's over fuck you in the comedy store but look at you and go I remember that one yeah I'll see you in two years our wagon for a belly room spot our friend did that remember we were talking about that I think I told yeah I told Lee that the first day I realized that our friend was going down hills and I said

hey you missed your spot at the main room and she goes ah why am I gonna go down there for $200 for and I just said okay yeah that's how easy that's how easy this yeah she was getting 1500 a gig two gigs a weekend they were living like doctors yeah she would show up for every spot one Saturday she told me she wasn't in the mood to go down there and I knew right down in there that you lost that thing yeah because this even me there's times I do is show in the main room and they pay me a couple hundred and I go right back to the original room to eat a bag of dicks for the small 15 you know what I'm saying yeah you know that does the ego that always feels great when you go into the main room and get paid and you bomb and then you go into the original room

for the same 15 yeah you eat a bigger bag of dicks you know it's crazy yeah it's like you're you're gonna get to this point Lee where it's like I got called up for a gig in Lancaster Christmas party fucking worst all right I drive all the way out to Lancaster for a hundred dollars 50 50 miles out 50 miles back I eat shit I get my money and whatever they feed me and I'm driving back thinking to myself maybe you ain't got it anymore maybe it's done maybe maybe you took too long off and you're just a fucking mess now and you can't do it well you still got a spot at the at the ice house go do the ice house and then just redeem yourself a little bit I went over to the ice house and I had a great set and I was back in and that's all it takes it's

like you know the bad sets the bad sets are always gonna happen there's gonna be moments when when you're not gonna you're you can't pay them to fucking laugh at you there is nothing that's gonna hit but at the end of the day I know this is the only fucking thing that I have ever been really good at that's it just talking you know what I mean it's all percentages it is this game is percentages and I use comedy I use poker oh yeah I use whatever you love you want to be a photographer the name of the game is staying at the table for as long as you can and every time you come to me and say I'm doing a pantheon for a movie I wrote good luck you know everybody wants to go all in yeah don't go all into your ready you don't need to make that move see what I'm at

your mouth there's one to go in I don't care if you set that table for eight and go I don't care if you sit there for eight hours and go and everybody will see like are you ever gonna put a bad it no because I'm waiting for the fastball yeah there's nothing wrong with waiting for the fastball that's right I'm not going nowhere and I'm fucking patient so you wait for the fastball that's the thing you look for the opportunities you've got to you know build yourself you know I want to do production I know it's going to be fucking hard but I want to do it I want you know because I'm a filmmaker in my head I'm a filmmaker I don't know if I got a I think I got a story but I got to write it and I got to learn how to make it and I've seen a lot

of guys out here doing that shit and I think I'm better with all due respect to them they had the balls to do it but now it's you know you can only train for so long then you got to step up to the fucking plate and show them what you're about and even if you fail at that so what you still throw down with it you're not gonna know until you try yeah that's the moral the fucking story the last movie I'm throwing out there is out of respect for Penny Marshall and it really is one of my favorite movies in the world it's big I think Tom Hanks was sensational I think the scene when he's jumping up and down the bed with the grown woman yeah it's sensational I think they're the scene at R. A. O. Fax with him and and loja and Lopez Lopez with Scarface

playing the piano with their feet yeah that's Lopez from Scarface that's Frank Lopez ain't it yeah you know you know it's like it's when you see grown people playing kids oh my god it's usually the worst if you have a big guys oh yeah by Penny Marshall I mean listen League of their own Tom Hanks is a motherfucker's motherfucker but fucking big is so good the kid who plays his best friend oh yeah it's good everybody in that fucking Elizabeth Perkins I had such a crush on her she was gorgeous I loved her and she had that Kevin Meany's in that movie the late great Kevin Meany love it's is in it I mean who else is in it yeah there's so many people no no no that's a big is a great movie so here's to grab your patents there you go we're going with rounders we're

going with fucking Sugar Hill we're going with fucking whatever the fuck I said well it's over Broadway Biloxi blues apocalypse now Gotti the 98th film by HBO not the new one with Travolta the French connection E2 Mama Tambien on the waterfront and motherfucking big that's down this fucking thing and you understand that's some good holiday viewing man you're not going to be disappointed and I want to thank uh when I went home I went to this restaurant called Sarantina he listens to the podcast his name is Jaco listen they have spaghetti with tiny meatballs yeah a dish I couldn't even finish it it was fucking tremendous he took care of us my family he sliced this octopus slice fucking thin Lee your asshole would have gone quack quack quack quack you have

no idea your asshole ever go quack quack quack quack it's very interesting but let me tell you something you know you have no idea but if you're in the north bergen area by Hudson county park go with uh Sarantina tell him tell Jaco uncle Joey sent you for the you got to see the arugula fucking pizza with the cheese over there when I kept looking the lady next to me kept eating pizza I'm like Jesus Christ I had the Caprese I didn't fart one time from the mozzarella I'm like those tolerance it was clean Bobby clean and stand me clean that mozzarella he had it was just a great fucking time Rick Ramos always a pleasure seeing you it's a thrill being here tell them to buy your podcast watch this with Rick Ramos that's very watch this it's me my buddy

brachino we just want this to get released we put it out every tuesday on itime to itunes yeah all right brother I want uh you guys to have a very merry fucking christmas and I mean this you know who you guys are from bobbling this to clear the hookie spooky the bobby sharing to to to the list goes fucking on and on you know I love you guys with all my fucking heart and I want you guys to have a great fucking holiday we'll be back on Thursday morning ready to rock I want to thank Rick Ramos I want to thank the christ killer but most importantly I want to thank and share with you guys for the love we shared this year together the ups and the downs on the show and our personal lives but we're all here every fucking week twice a motherfucking week

and we're not giving up to you motherfuckers uh a way you're supposed to be you know like the guys sitting in narcos when we look at things I don't look at things for what they are you look at things for what they could be you know and that's a a line we should all fucking remember I hope you have a happy fucking holiday with your family and uh have a great time and may Santa bring you everything you deserve from Lee myself and Rick Ramos and all the other guests on the church you see it I want to thank you guys from the bottom of my heart and to your families Merry Christmas and we'll see you guys Thursday all right don't forget I'm gonna be at the Oxnard Improv December 27 28th and 29th that's Thursday Friday Saturday you listen to this you

think I what am I gonna do with my Christmas money buy a bag of dope and come down and see Uncle Joey smoke a couple joints Leo be there Eric Rocha the king of the fucking gay bars will be there I love this fucking lineup it's torture Oxnard Improv Thursday Friday and Saturday once again I like to talk about my sponsors listen both seasons here and it's time to get it on the actual mybookie.com you want to start the year off fucking broke again like that mook in the corner don't be that guy with no root and interest as your relatives and friends sit around watching the games like fucking idiots eating fucking onion dip not this year motherfuckers if you're gonna watch a bowl game you're making money and there's gonna be 41 bowl games to bet on

including the national championship on January 7th so let me tell you some as far as I'm concerned it really is the most wonderful time of the year so make sure you're ready with daily action by signing up at mybookie.com today they pay fast when you win ownership really cares about good customer service and they offer the craziest props when you bet where you bet is just as important as what you're betting on and if you want to make money during both seasons you got to go with my bookie trust them but you don't have to take it for my word for it check them out yourself okay they got tremendous reviews they you pay they win everybody that makes fucking money it's that simple but listen you know me I've been doing business with my bookie for years so join now and my bookie

will offer you 50% deposit bonus to make sure you got a nice little bankroll for both season who takes care you like Uncle Joey nobody bitches you got to use promo code church when you deposit to activate the offer that means if you put in a hundred you got a yardstick and a half that's 150 bam just for using promo code church CHURCH at my bookie you play you win you get paid let me ask you a question are you gonna start the 2019 single maybe it's not the cut of your jib maybe it's not your bad breath maybe it's not that fucking wander and I maybe it's just every time it chicks up your dick she smells your asshole do you ever think about that and that asshole's got listen my asshole ain't no cleaner than yours until I discovered hello tushy.com you're asking me Joey

what's hello tushy do I gotta go to a doctor to stick a needle in my ass fuck no hello tushy's a portable bidet that you fucking install yourself in seven minutes a couple screws a hose bam now you take a shit you sit there like a doctor let the water sprinkle your ass you look around the room and you say to yourself who's better than me I got five dollars but at least my asshole smells fucking clean they come in all different shapes and sizes and prizes start at $69 you got a 60 day money back guarantee but listen I've been sitting on my bidet for three fucking years between the shits and the 300 pounds if I have them busting my bidet you won't do nothing to your bidet let me tell you something that hose has smelled some terrible fucking things and it hangs in there daily

like a fucking soldier inhaling the fucking winds of death that come out of my asshole but because I have a hello tushy bidet I eliminate that odor from my asshole so it smells nice and clean what you do is you keep a little french towel next to you put some fucking Irish spring and you stick it up your ass and you let the water take that dead soap and all that dead residue of god knows what you've been eating lately you're on the keto diet you got peanut juice and fucking Latisha milk all over yourself you don't need that hello tushy.com a portable bidet 69 95 they start at go to hello tushy.com right now this is the bidet you like it matches your patois bam put in the word muffler and get 10% off your order you understand me and listen it's

never too late to use hello tushy as a fucking Christmas present if you gave me something to keep my asshole clean I give you a big fucking hug like you just got back from Vietnam one of those anyway don't forget Oxnard Thursday Friday Saturday and hello tushy and my people over at my bookie who are fucking sensational again I want to wish you all a merry fucking Christmas and we'll worry about new years next week let's just get over for crock and Christmas the Korean might send a rocket ship and we got nothing you understand me and we're wasting time let's just hope Santa makes it to your house motherfuckers kick that motherfucking mule Lee again

Wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake wake, wake, wake, wake, wake wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake

wake, wake, wake, wake, wake wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake, wake wake