Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #645 - Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt

Episode Date: December 27, 2018

Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt sit down to talk about why the holidays may not be for everyone and why preparation is so important if you want you new year to be successful.  This podcast is brought to you by:     ZipRecruiter - post your job to 200+ job sites with a single click for free at www.ziprecruiter.com/church   Onnit.com. Use Promo code CHURCH for a 10% discount at checkout.   Recorded live on 12/26/2018.


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Oh, it's Christmas. Little motherfucking Janet Jackson. Take it off of you. What? All plastic surgery, but who gives a fuck? You know what I'm saying? What am I a doctor? Hit it.

Oh, shit. It's kicking. Here we go. Here we go, Lee. Oh, shit. Thursday. You're sitting there with a thumb up your ass asking yourself, what the fuck am I at work today?

What the fuck? Oh, why am I not at work today? What the fuck? Whatever your dilemma is. Listen, Merry Christmas post to you motherfuckers. And that's it. Like I said, the beginning 2019 is definitely motherfucking here. That's the first thing I thought about this morning like fuck.

Christmas is fucking over. We got a couple more days of this bullshit. And then on the 7th, it takes a couple more days. People are talking about their bullshit of where they went to Morocco and they smoked ash with some fucking Indian. So nobody's really fucking full navigate until the 15th of January. That shit pisses me the fuck off. You know, but we'll talk about that stuff later.

What I really want to talk to you about that I noticed. I've noticed for the first time this year. I've noticed it in people before, but I really didn't notice it as much as I did this year. It was like, I don't know. Maybe I'm getting older and you look at things. For the first time in a long time, I realized how people, there's a lot of people out there don't do well over the holidays.

What do you mean? Don't do well. They just don't do well. This part of the year does not agree with them. And I'm one of those people. Is it like what you were talking about earlier with people aren't working or just emotionally? Just just emotionally.

Some people do not click this time of the year. They, they, and I was in New York last week. You know, I could be honest with you guys. I was in New York last week that I want to fucking be there. I'd rather be in my fucking warm house, minding my business going to kickboxing and shit like that. I went to New York for my family. I took my wife and my daughter and it was cold and there was

ferries to take and Monday alone, we took fucking six Uber's and it, but their happiness made me happy. Did I give a Frenchman's fuck about Christmas? Not really. I mean, the lights blew me away at Saks Fifth Avenue and the tree, look, you saw it, you've been seeing trees since you were fucking three. So it's got fucking lights on it.

St. Patrick's is overwhelming, but my point is this. I don't know. And I thought about it when I was there. I don't know. I don't know if it's those scumbag kids that ruined it by telling me fucking there was no Santa. I don't know if my mother dying gave me a weird feeling about

Christmas, but I always just, just it just because you see some people and they're having a great time and they wear the fucking ugly sweaters and they go to parties and they take pictures and it's supposed to be joy. You've been sitting there smoking a joint. There's people saying outside your door and you're like, what the fuck do I do now? Like what, what, what do I do?

I got people saying on outside my door, you open the door and you're standing like a jerk off when you look at them and then you give them candy or a couple of dollars. They got a dollar. You got a fucking throat loss and I don't know. I just never got that. How has it changed for you since you've had mercy? Christmas is for her.

But my wife will tell you. There's a couple of things I hate doing in life. I ain't going to fucking doctor, but you got to go because you got to give them blood. But if I tell you what I hate the most, I hate shopping. I hate shopping, but I got to go buy clothes. I go in there like a fucking hurricane. I go in there.

I know what size I am. I know what waist. I know what jeans I want. When I'm going to fucking the tall fat store up at the Panga Canyon up there, right? Double X, whatever. It's 15 minutes. Like I know exactly what I'm looking for.

I know the sections to go to a couple, look at a couple of things. I go to the section that's got the blue dots where it's like 40% off and shit. But I know exactly what the fuck I want, but I hate going Christmas shopping. Like I'd rather give you the 20 and go buy yourself a fucking bottle of booze.

Leave me the fuck alone. I got a, I got a hunt and rap. I just, it just never, I don't understand. It just never really. So growing up, you're always doubting yourself. Like, why do I feel this way growing up? I'd be at a house and people be giggling and shit. And all I'd want to do is watch the football game.

You know, that's all you really want to do. You're interested for the onion dip. And the football game, you know, and it's kind of sad. So I thought it was just me. And then you fucking go out into the world and you bump into different people. And I remember having a friend in snow mass. Good guy.

And I didn't figure it out till like the third year I was in snow mass that he would disappear on the holidays. He would disappear and just lay low. And I asked his brother and he goes, you didn't know this by hanging out with him so long. You never see him over the holidays. And I thought about it. You just never saw it.

Something happened to him when he was a kid over the holidays and he never got that. I get it. I mean, I'm, I'm, I'm gonna, you asked me when you got here what I was doing for New Year's. I'm not a big party guy at all. So New Year's for me. I like to stay in sometimes, sometimes.

And sometimes it gets lonely, but I've gotten to a point where I enjoy it. And I, I honestly think that well, the reason I asked about mercy is my mom was here for two weeks and it was great. I hadn't seen her in about a year other than a couple days in Boston. And it made me think about you. I was like, I can't.

Now every time I see her part of me, even though I hate admitting is like, I wonder if this is the last time I'll see her. And I can't imagine what it would be like to have holidays without without her. So with it and whether or not like, what, maybe you just don't get along with your family or maybe you just don't like people.

I get it. I don't like being around a lot of people. So for me, I get instead of being down about it, I try to be like, okay, well, what do I, if, if it's going to make me happy to sit at home and watch a three Stooges marathon on AMC. That's what it is. Then just do what I like. I give yourself the gift of just being making yourself happy.

Right. That's, that's why that's a good angle. That's a great angle that I agree with you. I did it for years. I did it for years. I didn't want to impose my not same misery, but not understanding and I was raised Catholic and I get the effects that Jesus was born and I get all that stuff and I love giving gifts.

I love all that shit. Just it's not like I'm fucking caught, you know, singing down the streets, jumping up and down. And this year I've looked around me and I've looked at the people around me and I told Rogan when I got back because Rogan was talking to me, him and his wife were thinking about New York or whatever. And I said, you know, I love New York City, but for me, it

works three months a year. It works in September, October and April, no humidity, no cold weather, that stuff. But when it comes to the holidays, New York destroys LA by a landslide. What do you mean? That right now in LA, like when I got off the plane, I could tell I was in LA and the Christmas spirit had just died.

Like it just died. Like in New York, everything was up. Lights were up. People were singing already, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. You come to LA and there's really nothing going on. Last night when I got home or two nights ago, Christmas Eve, I realized there was a North Hollywood Christmas parade. Did you know about it?

No, I didn't. I didn't know nothing about it. I didn't know nothing about it. We live right here close to North Hollywood. I didn't know nothing about it. So yeah, I'm not blaming anything. The main topic here is depression over the holidays. And how I know for a fact, I spoke to five people this year.

That were having a fucking hard time with holidays. There's a lot of pressure. My dad even said it. He's like, even when you turn on the TV, all the movies and TV shows show people with their families and if you happen to not live near your family, it's like, am I doing something wrong or like, why don't I have that? And so yeah, it's hard to avoid this time of year.

Like we were thinking of having people over Christmas Eve. I said, you know what? Let's just have people over Christmas Eve. I called 15 people, 12 of them were going to be out of town. And then I was like, I got to think about mercy and somebody invited us that's where there's 30 kids. Right. So we were going that route.

I wanted to spend Christmas at the house. I would have fucking done it up nicely, you know, but out of the 15 people I like, 12 of them were gone. Right. You know, I just don't want to have an open house and then I have every fucking body at the house. That's my nightmare. Lying to you.

Yeah. An open house. Would anyone could just show up? Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. But I really wanted to do that. But again, I called around. Steve Simone was gone.

Kay, Quigley's gone. The Obama's gone. I mean, the amount of people who were fucking gone was just mind boggling. That's why I like LA this time of year. It's because everyone believes. It's it's empty. You know, so that that didn't bum me out.

But I wanted to just give something back to all you guys. You know, I see all the time. I think it was me, you and the Agostino. I got everybody I called. That's funny. Yeah. And the Agostino's from here. That's why I got family and he had obligations.

So to be me, you, your mom and the baby, the baby would have been losing the fucking mind at six o'clock at night on Christmas. I said, forget it, because that's all we're down to. You know, we have no family out here, nothing like that. But all these things, I mean, none of these things on the surface or even on the interior bottom, none of those things. It's just this time of the year. And if you know anything about me, part of me is the boredom.

If you know anything about me, part of me is the action, especially living here because it just dies. It just dies. And I've told these guys for years. I shot an NFL promo commercial on Christmas Eve, maybe 2010, 2008. Work here goes late. So sometimes you catch a run, Jack, like I call it a late run one year commercials in November.

So to November, one in December, then I caught like a movie. Things happen, you know, till the fucking 20th. I tell people that all the time. Things don't go nowhere. Things happen lately. I've been looking like a fucking asshole. Nothing's happens. Like you don't know what it's like to go on break knowing that on

January 7th, you're going to a set and you're going to report to shoot three days on a fucking TV show. You're fucking holidays are so happy. You're so happy because not a lot of people go right into the year working. Right. Which is the other thing about this is like, I can't. It must be tough leaving. Like let's say we left for these two weeks and then you have to pay for

a hotel and all that. You have to buy all these Christmas gifts and then January 1st rent is doing your work for a couple of weeks and you paid all that money. Like I almost take a little mini vacation in like February or something. Just why pay all this extra money for a flight now? Especially if the holidays aren't that important to you. Go somewhere in March. Do something like that.

But no time of the year is important to me. The time of the year is important to me is when I'm working and having a good time. And you know, I've never been a vacation type of guy. Let's get it out of the way. You're either vacation type of person or you're not vacation type of person. You have to live with these things. You have to come with this conclusion. Know yourself.

Know yourself. So you don't put yourself in bad predicaments because sometimes we pick a partner who wants to be fucking Julie McCoy and she's a travel director and every week they want to do something. And you know what? In the beginning, because you want to get in their pants, you agree this shit, but throughout the year, they'll tell you like every three months, we need to take a trip and now you're caught up in this shit.

I'm going to these and for some people, they really enjoy that and I'm not knocking that at all. I've just never been a vacation. I like a relaxing vacation. I don't want to have to stand up comedy. You're your relaxation is just sitting at home and not moving. Exactly. So I wanted to do that in a hotel.

Yeah. Yeah. That's what you wanted to do all year. Yeah. So what's the difference? There's no vacation for you. I'm talking about people who go away and actually like let that mind go and have a great time.

I don't qualify. I don't qualify and you're right. If I do go on a vacation, I don't like that much movement. I don't like that much movement. I enjoyed Disneyland because I was on the site. You know, I enjoy when I go to Huntington Beach because I'm on the site, you know, 20 people have hit me up and asked me if I'm going to UFC on Saturday and they got a better chance of seeing fucking Mohammed Gandhi

that because if I got a listen, I won't drive downtown for fucking dick. They understand me. I fucking hate going downtown to try me test me like Hollywood is bad enough Marina Del Rey is bad enough. Well, then Hills. See if you ever see my Cuban ass downtown. I wouldn't fucking go downtown if you paid me. I get lost every time I go downtown.

You just go down there and get lost. So I wouldn't go to a fight. I went to one fight. There was the biggest mistake because you leave with 18 to I can't do. I like the fights. I got spoiled with Joe. We would go right from the Mandalay Bay upstairs right downstairs. Right.

I love that shit. I got to leave once I got to leave the facility and you've got a far ride. You're in no danger. Plus it takes a while to get out of the parking lot. I can't imagine. You know, it's it's people think like what the I met a guy on a plane a couple months ago, maybe a month ago or something. He's like, Hey man, if you're I travel a lot if you're lonely and you want to

come over to my house. I go, where do you live? You told me go in contrast to the show. Whereas it goes about 45 minutes ago. Listen, you got a better chance of hanging yourself and pulling him aboard Dane because and he was like, really? And I go, yeah. And then I think last week or the week before you guys retweeted Chris Delia.

I agree. I love that. That was the best. And you know, guys, you look at that clip and you go, there's something wrong with Delia. I look at that clip and I go, that's me. And there was a clip of Delia basically just saying when people call him up and ask him to do shit.

Yeah. You want to play flag football? You know, you want to, you want to go to eat the best pancakes? I don't think so. Do you want to go stand on line and get breakfast? Not really. Do you want that? I'm the same person.

I don't know what I want to do till I want to do it. I feel bad for people. People call me up for a tight bench. You're going to do something. Tell you, let me know. Okay. I don't know what I'm going to do and I'm going to do it. If I call you up and you say to me, I'll be there in 40 minutes.

You lost. So that's why I don't call nobody because I'm ready to go 30 minutes. No, because when I'm ready to go, I'm ready to go. That's why I fly solo. When this finger does this, when you're with me and this finger does this, that means I'm about to turn my back. I'm going to start walking. Oh, that's why I get nervous when I go with you to shows.

Cause I'm like, he's going to leave me. I have to know where he is. Stop. You fucked up. I will get in that car and leave you there. I have left tons of people at different places. This finger means wrap it up. We'll leave it.

Once you see this shoulder go across like Bellagosi, like when he puts his cape on, you're in no danger of seeing me stop. I go deaf. I don't hear nothing. You could be yelling, Joe, Joe. I don't know nothing. I get to that car. I pop it open.

I get in that car. I don't know what I want to do till I want to do it. I felt really bad. I have a friend in Jersey and he kept calling me, man, let me know when you're going to do something. I'm like, you're 40 minutes away. By the time you get here, I've done it, rolled the joint and watched an episode of fucking narcos.

So that's why I don't like that. When I'm sitting there and I get that first burst of hunger. I start thinking about what places I want to go to and I start thinking about who would I call to go to those places? You never except Mexican food. Maybe your sushi days with me are done. You embarrass me with that generic white sushi. Who cares?

Because see, this is what I was with you until this point. Who cares what the other person is eating and then he wasn't going to Japan now to eat fucking American sushi. No, I would try something there. Yeah, you would try something there. He gets mad at me because I eat tuna and shrimp and different variations of all that. Who cares fucking shrimp?

Shrimp is delicious. How bad to go get the same shit you get everywhere, which is shrimp, salad, shrimp toast, the main fucking thing so they could slice it and put on a piece of rice and it's still delicious. No, it doesn't taste like shit. You're gonna put wasabi on it. I do, but okay, I do absolutely put wasabi on it. How dare you?

I do. He just gets mad. I don't know what you want, but then you do. You said I can't go to sushi anymore. You're an embarrassment. So I tell you the truth. You're an embarrassment. Not taking you for sushi.

Even the way you're embarrassed. I was gonna say the way the way it looks. I mean, goes, who would you find this fucking mutt? Two sushi tuna and fucking shrimp like a fucking delicious name is Hank. Get the fuck out of here. You gotta get the rolls. I do get rolls.

The blue carb rolls, the social rolls, the fucking eyeball rolls. You gotta get all those rolls. Fucking people trying to get whatever, but you know, like the death thing really bothers me because I could tell you even before my mother died, I wasn't hip on the Christmas day. I was hip on it because I knew my mom was going to give me an envelope. Beside that, I wasn't hip on it.

Like I didn't give a fuck. Once I found out there was no Santa. I just lost it. I think it was the no Santa thing. I don't know who told me because my mom for about two or three years had me fucking confused. She had me on the ropes guys. My mom was that good and I watched like a hawk.

And when you watch them like a hawk and they fuck you, you can't. My mother was good from the ages of five to like eight. She had me even after people told me there was a fucking Santa Claus and I confronted her. She still fucked my shit up. I looked all over that house for gifts and the tank and the basements.

I looked everywhere. I couldn't find them. I went to the bar with her. I came back the gifts on to the fucking tree. So this day, I never like before she died, never really asked her because I kind of like the fucking thought of there being a Santa. Yeah.

It does. I mean, I grew up. The only way I was thinking is if one of her friends slipped in and broke gifts and then slipped back out. That's the only way I could but I would watch her like a hawk. All those Christmas years that she was alive. Then once I found out I didn't give a fuck what and watch

but I would watch her like a fucking hawk. If she was going to the store, what she would bring when she come back. I would look through the receipts and I couldn't find the fucking thing and then Christmas fucking Eve. There's 20 gifts. So that's what I think fucked me up. Once I fucked up, once that scumbag on the corner told me

there wasn't a Santa and must have crushed everything I had inside as a kid. There's that. I always hated getting like for holiday stuff like you have to get ready and God forbid it's at your house. You have to help her help her mom get ready and set the table. I used to hate that stuff. That was and then and then there's always like a couple people

at the parties that you don't like and then you have to spend your time avoiding them. That was what got me everywhere. I go to something I don't like so I'm used to that shit except jujitsu and shit like that. But it just bothers me that because I know I'm not alone. I know I spoke to a few people and I thought I was the only one that had it and I faked the funk for years and then over

the years I've heard people mention little things under their breath like I can't wait till it's over. You know and even in the Netflix special I talk about the first year without having my mother that I think back at that and it's traumatized like it's it's amazing that I made it through that holiday patch. Especially that young if it wasn't for the drugs and my stupidity maybe I would have been dead.

I don't I don't I don't fucking know but I know that first year when I think back to it when I was writing that joke and I thought about Gina and I remember just thinking about that first year without her. It was like anything else in my life like it was like going to prison and thinking about not having weed ever again. Like nothing happened. Life went on like you always think something bad is going

to happen like when I got set and something I'm going to make it in there without weed. I don't need Chinese food. I need this but I'm always going to need weed. Next thing you know I didn't smoke weed for six months and I was doing well. You know you always think how you're going to make it and that's that first holiday without that loved one is got

to be one of the roughest fucking patches in your life and it starts you get that not in your stomach two days before Thanksgiving. Doesn't even bother you you think about it but you put it under the carpet and then two days before Thanksgiving you get that fucking not and then Thanksgiving you realize that person's not at the table. That is terrible that is horrible when you realize that

that person's not at the table and then you go to bed that night. You're a little bum but you wake up the next day and there's fucking Christmas everywhere but you're numb to it. You're immune to it you got immune to it at the fucking Thanksgiving table and you go through the motions and you smile with your girlfriend or your wife. But at the end of the day you're like I fucking can't wait

for this fucking holiday to be over. I don't know why Christmas is that holiday and listen you know there's a lot of ways to seek help you call a friend the suicide hotlines this just people to talk to but might go to people my friends man. When I'm feeling that way and sometimes you don't have to tell them. You don't have to call your friends and say you're feeling

shitty just calling somebody and them talking to you for 4 or 5 minutes about generalities unravels things. You don't have to call me and go Joey I feel like a fucking asshole I miss my mommy I mean I'll accept that. But I'd rather you call me and talk to me about something else and unravel your mind that way because that's what I usually do when I'm a little stuck I'll call somebody I'll call a motherfucker to in the morning and I'll unravel with him and then

if he gets to the core of it. Then I'll tell him like I have a friend Mike Duffy that I've known since Colorado I've known him since grammar school really his family his father I met his father before I knew him. We've been talking a lot the last couple of days because we're both hurting over a friend. He's hurting over his son going into the army and he's all

alone you know. It's ugly to be 59 and to be all alone in your home you know a lot of people going through some stuff right now another dear friend of mine lost his parents this year he's going through some shit. You know I saw a dear friend we have a dear friend that's going through some stuff right now he lost his dad about two Christmases ago and I see it.

And this year like two of the three people and I'm not spoken to because I just remember this topic just fucking. You know I thought about it when I was in New York a lot about it. Because it was back in my neighborhood the one day we're going to the Metropolitan Museum of Art. We're supposed to turn 86th Street I told the captain who would drive to turn on 88th Street instead so I could see

my old building and I saw the Christmas holidays. I saw the Christmas holidays on Amsterdam and as I went to the Met was when I started thinking about it how. If it wasn't for my wife and daughter New York it would just been another day for me. But since I had my wife and daughter in the car and they were happy you know you should have seen my daughter's face at the fucking Radio City Music Hall now.

Would I go to that thing on my own with my wife fuck no fuck no but even my wife just to see the smile on her face while she was holding the baby up and the baby would sit next to me then she would go back and then I passed out for two fucking hours. I fell asleep at the Radio City Music Hall Rockets show you know I'm embarrassed I was when I woke the fuck up. That's what dads do.

Oh my God I put the 3D glasses on and just passed the fuck out but. Just doing that the next day of going to New York and walking around. And that's an all those memories came back to me that. Like I still remember going to the tree with my friends. Being in like. 13 in the eighth grade.

And lying to my mom telling my mom that we're going to go somewhere. And we take the bus over go to the Rockefeller Center go see the tree and they'd be a bunch of kids singing and me and my friends would sit there like these fucking momo singing like you know like I would think to myself not really my friends as much as I would. Because I never felt that I never felt the joy to fucking

want to sing. You know like I don't like that. So I'm just trying to say is that listen man. If you don't feel it through the holidays. You're not alone. For years I felt. That I was the only person that was going through this. And it made me feel fucking terrible inside like it made you

feel like a Scrooge you're not a Scrooge you're just not a fucking holiday person. And something must have happened. You know what happened. Which makes you know I always tell people one of your parents died or somebody close to you died sometimes in life it's like taking salt out of your food. It's like you still eat food every day but it's not salty.

It doesn't have that flavor to it. That's what happens. That's what happens when you lose a loved one. And a holiday comes that holiday isn't the same because so I get all that shit. But what I'm trying to explain to you people is not to feel bad. That you're not fucking Elvis Presley jumping up and down

for joy. It's normal. You don't have to go see a psychiatrist. You don't have to go see anything you just because trust me I beat myself up over this for fucking years. And I can't tell you how many Christmases I was doing well that I just fell asleep. Like I couldn't wait for the holiday because I knew I could

sleep for two or three days. And then I would get revved up again for New Year's Eve and I'd be ready to go like I am now like now I'm ready for the fucking year to start. Like I'm ready to fucking go. I want Oxnard to be over do Oxnard tomorrow Friday and Saturday tonight Friday and Saturday and then fucking that's it.

And then I got a whole week of waiting. You got a whole week because this town ain't doing nothing till Wednesday which is the second. Right. Yeah. Absolutely not. Nothing's happening. So for a guy like me.

Yeah. I got shit to do. I can write. I wrote today. I went to Jiu Jitsu today into the private my man Vinny. I could do shit. But it's not the type of action like my or my other action to shut down.

We could still do the podcast which is great. I mean we could have taken off. We took off last week. We could have taken off but no I wanted somebody especially this shit this topic where people are feeling this right now still and they're going to listen to this podcast and go oh I was I thought I was the only one that felt that way. No I did this podcast because I wanted you to know that you're

not alone. There's no chemical imbalance. There's no nothing. Some people like broccoli. Some people don't you know the other day Lee came out of his mom and they were kind enough to stop at gelsons right and get cupcakes or something. Yeah.

And I saw Lee open up a cupcake. I never saw anything like that in my life. It was the neatest cupcake. If you looked at Lee you thought he had a fucking lobster tail in front of him with a piece of pussy next to it on the side. I watched the whole cupcake go down but he did it so politely like he had a paper towel under it. He had a plan for this cupcake and he took the wrapper off

the cupcake very meticulously. He didn't want to mess up the frosting and if I'm correct I think he even used the fork. Absolutely. That's how much it was as meticulous as I've ever seen anybody eat a fucking really I hate there's nothing I hate more and this is why I think the fly thing bothers me. I might not be super organized but I hate like getting sticky

or getting stuff on my it drives me bananas. So the thought of getting like cup because there's like those bit a lot of frosting on it the thought especially at your house like not like at my house I could wipe it off or go wash my hands but it's somewhere somewhere else in front of the bathroom. No. My mom has a joke that when I was a kid.

She could leave me on a towel outside because I didn't like the feeling of grass on my like it was like it was prickly. So I don't I don't like all that I don't I don't like frosting on me out like I don't go and get wings out because I can't imagine how like very rarely. I hate it's out. Yeah. What do you wings out like if you go out and go to like Buffalo

Wild Wings or a place to get the only place I've got wings with you is that place and I think it was Austin the hotel had really good wings but if you look I feel like 18 napkins in front of me because there's no way I'm leaving out my face especially around my mom and then your wife and daughter you don't want to make an ass of yourself. So you make a ass of yourself doing everything else. What's the difference between fuck Merry Christmas.

What the between eating the cupcake like it's the last fucking steak on earth. My point was that the way you look at that cupcake I didn't give a fuck about a cupcake I don't give a fuck about cupcakes but the way you look at that cupcake you meant business. Absolutely you ripped the things off. You cut it with a fork you to me I would just eat the cupcake in two fucking bites because I'm not a Molly.

So that's what I'm trying to say. We beat ourselves up too much. We beat ourselves up too much and you're talking to the King of beat himself up. Nobody beats themselves up more than I do. That's why I smoke the weed. I smoke the weed so I can think about what I did to the fucking precision and then beat myself up along the fucking way.

Why did this why I said that that's the reason why smoke weed weed keeps me in check. It always has always will be it plays the tape back and makes me remember what I did why I did it and what made me fucking do it. So this is what I'm just trying to say to you people that again the holidays are not for you. That's fine.

They don't have to be. There is a holiday that's for you. Maybe you go fucking bananas during the 4th of July. Maybe you feel like marching during Martin Luther King Day. I don't fucking know. But that's the whole point of this fucking podcast tonight that and something else. The thing that might made my dick hard today was that Sunday

Christmas Eve. I had to go to the other side of town and I stopped in CVS and I got my fucking day planner for 2019 and I got my notebook for 2019 even though I didn't need it. And it's so weird that to me right now today. It's 2019 and I'll tell you something if you want to get anything accomplished next year you should be playing right now like it's 2019 already.

Right now you're shooting pool. You're putting the balls you're setting up the field for your 2019 to be easier. I already started writing my goals to 2019 already starting to figure out how I want to do things. I talked to the book agent told them where I was. You know I'm already setting up like Lee that's what I did today.

I talked to a few agents today. I mean I am the type of guy that in my mind it's 2019. I want everybody to know that you ain't going to wait to the 15th of the month when you're fucking with me. We go right to work Wednesday the second right to work. We go right to work like nothing happened. There's nothing I could do before that nothing you could do. You're just going to be calling an empty fucking phone.

I bumped into somebody the other night some girl at the comedy store something that she was asking me if I knew who wanted a job I go now is not the time of the year. And then she goes well also trying to get an agent I go again now is not the time of the year. She goes I'm going to go on Thursday and put on a bunch envelopes I go to who a bunch of dead people they're not coming back to the 7th and to top it off mentally they're not going

to be there till you have to imagine the 10th or the 11th. There's not going to be no mental you're still thinking about the holidays and what you spent and flying back and your kid got sick and your cat vomited and you know so you have so many fucking things that are on your mind this part this different parts of the year where you're thinking of things me I'm not doing anything but I am doing something. I'm setting up my year.

I am setting up my year and this is the same thing. I'm no smarter than you fucking guys. This is the same thing you motherfuckers should be doing. Yeah tomorrow you have work Friday you have work start thinking about this at work start thinking about this tomorrow instead of watching TV go for a walk take a pad and a piece of pen for you and figure out what things you want to do next year.

What things are you sick and fucking tired and not doing that you need to fucking do already I've been on it like already I'm starting to do this shit already I told you nobody beats themselves up more than I do. Last night I got up at 4 in the fucking morning. I stayed up for about 35 minutes I got so high I had to go right back to bed I'm not gonna lie about it. I got some tremendous fucking we that took a picture of it

tonight I got so fucking high last night I went back to bed to eight in the morning. I went to bed about 10 last night. Damn that is good week quarter to 10 I was out fucking cold. And I got up at 4 wide awake with a thousand things to write. I got up I peed I made a fucking cup of coffee. I thought I was gonna have to stay up. I'm just gonna stay up and go to jujitsu 11 with Vinny and

dog I went in the back of smoke this fucking weed and I got so high I'm like oh my God even with the coffee I got to go back to bed and I went back in that bedroom I put my head down and my heart was beat like oh I'm not gonna fall asleep next thing I opened up there was 758 I like it I got a fucking couple hours in me I'm rested but I when I woke up I looked over what I wrote and it was my goals. Like personal goals weight goals comedy goals you know like

all that time I started writing down like comedy for example you know I want to do 20 weeks and I want to shoot a special and I want to write something different for a special and I started writing down what things I had to do to do that right an hour a day get on stage five times a week. You know I put down that I want to go down to 265 that's 21 pounds you know I wrote how am I going to do that by watching my points by being careful with the edibles and

smoking weed and going crazy at night with the fucking munchies I pretty much little by little lemonade everything out of the house at night late night except for the fucking two-point Jello puddings those Jello puddings are two points I can eat those all fucking bad night I can eat two and I was gonna fucking good and nobody gets that feelings or carpet Cosby gets a nickel you know and everybody's already can buy fucking vizine for his glossy eyeballs and shit so you can

fucking try to rape somebody in prison that for best. And yeah if you're not getting your 219 an order your fucking slip you really are like you should already have your notebook you should already just start writing down if you want to go to college what you want to do while you're in college with things you want to look at anybody can write that gold's down this is what I learned from writing gold's down that anybody can write yeah I want a Mercedes but how are you

gonna get a Mercedes yeah I want a new wife how are you gonna get a new wife once you write that how out that's where the power comes from it's like when you lift weights you don't lift weights you don't gain strength from the push it's from the pullback from how you resist it's the same thing with gold's when you write your gold's down I love when people send me gold's and they're like I want to do this I want to be an astronaut I want to make a million dollars you tell me how

you make a million dollars what is your plan if you write it out to the fucking T as crazy as this sounds I swear to God as crazy as this fucking sounds when it happens you will go back and look over this thing and it won't be exactly how you said it was gonna happen but it'll be pretty fucking close because a man without a plan is not a man so write it out you know I wrote out that I want to do a new special I wanted to be centralized around the story and then jokes coming from

that story if I'm a good story tell I got to utilize these things and it was so weird how already from doing I didn't write the story I wanted to say anything but from writing out the story and the way I want to attack it I filled out like three quarters of a page you're gonna notice that you your own mind will tell you what you already know years ago I told you everybody buys an iPhone and an iPad you I have the answers to your fucking problems you just don't want to fucking look

at them and be honest with yourself that's what being grounded really really comes in you have to look at yourself and go these are my fucking shortcomings and there's nothing I can do about it these are my shortcomings and there's nothing I can fucking do about it what am I gonna do well I can either let them be shortcomings or I could work on them and they're still gonna be shortcomings but they're gonna be a little stronger and that's what I did this year with a

lot of different situations and for some reasons for some things that work for me and for some things that didn't it's me being as grounded as I can number one I have you guys to keep me in check number two I talked to my friends at home every fucking day they keep me in check I never want to forget about who the fuck I am and if I'm slipping I should know because of the results when you're slipping you know because of the results you're getting I did three spot I stayed on

stage for two weeks I went on stage Saturday which is the fucking disaster and I went on stage twice Sunday there were both disasters the timing was off the jokes were off everything was fucking off I know this so yesterday that night when I got home Sunday obviously I went to the drawing board a little bit but Monday Christmas Eve wasn't I really realized the mistakes I had made and there was nothing you could do it was called ring rust and laziness that's what

happened it was ring rust and laziness not lazy because I didn't get on stage you should always give it a breather especially would stand up especially after you've gone through a long stretch to get rid of the bad mistakes you're doing when I was a basketball player had a bad mistake I used to do I would grab the rebound and then throw it down and then go up when you grab a rebound you don't put the ball down you go right back up with it so for years I made this

horrible mistake sometimes on stage you make mistakes you stick on to a saying you shouldn't be saying there's something in your jokes that you shouldn't be saying I promise myself that when I went to New York I was gonna look over my jokes and rewrite them get rid of the Terry Crew stuff get a new clothes or when I went back to New York between not feeling well and always being on the move I didn't really have a chance to look over it when I got back I looked over it for

two days but it wasn't sufficient time to go on stage and prepare my main excuse for myself I'm telling you the reasons why I fail I know when I fail on stage and I try to correct it so when I go out in front of the big stages like this week and I'm fucking prepared for that a lot of people can't deal with that a lot of people don't like when people say something to them about them me on the type of person I don't like somebody to say something to me about it I should

feel it I should know it I should see what the fuck is going on so this is just a couple things just to get you to 19 started if life hasn't been going your way maybe start taking some advice maybe start asking people for help you know you know just because it works for fucking Lee doesn't mean it's gonna work for you just because it works for Joey Diaz doesn't mean that's gonna work for you just because it means it works for you doesn't mean it's gonna work for Joey Diaz but I will

tell you one thing that works constantly and that's writing down your goals and that's yearly quarterly and monthly and if you really want to push it go weekly I do all four I do what I want from the year and I look back at what I wanted from this year and let me tell you something I got everything except two guest spots on TV shows I went for four I got two so I was halfway there you know I looked at how many times I auditioned I didn't even have the opportunity to fucking book

two other ones because I only went out for like three other fucking shows all year I only went on seven auditions this year compared to what 10 years ago 240 Wow and I'm going with three theatrical auditions a week and two commercial auditions a week so now I'm going with 12 theatrical right and fucking eight commercials

so I would I would I would do 20 auditions a month from 1997 to 2007 that was pretty much the fucking that was pretty much it especially for a guy like me especially after the Sopranos how many fucking opportunities opened up I went on seven fucking auditions this year

unless something changes the next four fucking days unless you guys know I got two movies two movies offered to me thank you very much the people offered them to me but there were movies that were both out of state and I had already prior fucking commitments but that's how slow the TV movie business has been for me but I put four guest stars on four different shows and I got to I put a special down

I put 20 weeks of work down I put the right 30 new minutes of material I did all so do you put the ones that you missed on next year next year is next year next year I want something different okay so for next year I want something different no you never tag on next year you want a different set of fucking goals every year is something different and it's

I want you to when you're writing your goals yeah you want life goals and you want success goals but I'll tell you what the page is that should be even bigger is your personal goals weight attitude you know all that shit that goes in there with it I started doing that one about 10 years ago well maybe about seven years ago and I started lighting up

I could feel my life lightning up a little bit once I started writing because it's important it's important to notice stress it's important to notice pressure it's important to notice unhappiness it's important to notice so many things as they touch your life so you don't absorb them do you follow I'm saying to you

frustration with your job you you ever have a job and you you go to work early every day and you know what man I want a promotion and also some guy comes in he's got a college degree and he gets a promotion that's frustration you know what quit your fucking job because they already touched you with frustration it's going to grow inside of you

you're going to continue to go to that job see that boss see that guy yeah he might get fine then you might get the job but they didn't want to give you the job in the first place so you don't really want to be there situations like that when things touch you that's it because if they touch you and you feel that it's only going to get worse for you

you know on happiness you know uneasiness if you're stressed out by a job like you fucking the 80 hours a week and they don't tell you what to do and you know they want results all those little things they take away from your fucking who you are you don't know it and you don't see that 20 and 30 near the die I see it now I see how happy I am now

that once I notice it the neck hair stick up and you either could proceed or step back if you proceed you're going to get the same results you always got the rest of your fucking life if you step back you might lose a little bit of money you might lose a little

bit of fucking work but you know what you gain peace of mind and you gain two years on your fucking life which is the most important fucking thing at the end of the fucking you know it's so weird but I this is why again it's a joke but I fucking hated that whole thing of 30 years ago because 30 years ago

if you would ask me my goals the first one I would write down would be money money money money money money I wanted money I wanted money I didn't have a reason why I wanted I didn't know how I was going to make it I just the number one thing would be money not to keep up with the Joneses so I could do coke and drive a test of Rosa

and about 15 years ago I found the happiness of life and even though me and my wife lived in a one bedroom apartment with six cats and the apartment smell like cat piss we had air conditioner we had cable TV we had a microwave the refrigerator was always filled with food

and that's the first time that I gained real happiness in my life on my own and I still remember sitting on that we not even have a couch what's that shit the futon we had a futon like broke we had a crazy glue put two by 12s in it you know it was like Ralphie's Ralphie broke everybody's futon no in town or everybody everybody had a futon and

broke it Ralphie broke it from the guy that opened this little doors up to us the boxer but I still got to get on the podcast Medina so there was a Gavin Boyd's he broke Gavin Boyd's fucking whatever and he broke somebody else's he broke like three or four of those fucking from that futon in Hollywood

that was the first time I haven't looked around we had an apartment bro that if there was an earthquake the walls with there was an earthquake once when I lived in that building and I could hear the bricks hitting each other it was the scariest building in the world it's hell they retrofitted it but all we need is a 3.5 earthquake and that buildings going down it didn't matter

I remember sitting on the couch with one of the cats at that time I was doing coke I was still doing coke when I remember I was saying you know what I'm a lot happier now than when I was ten years ago and I don't have three quarters of the shit I want but I had a girlfriend that cared for me

I had these cats that I loved and I had a semi little comedy career going out the comedy store I was working I was acting I was like fuck I just shot this with James Coburn I just did this you know

I was happy and there was no money there was no money there was maybe 80 bucks in an ATM account and my wife had six or seven hundred functioning dollars for the house that you know we wrote a check we would bounce it just like anybody else in America you know just like anybody else in America

you know so it's just really weird that I remember going wow I have $80 in the checking account and I have a checking account life ain't that bad and this whole time I thought I needed a million dollars you don't you don't I'd rather you have a job that you enjoy three people that you like around you

a home that suits your needs you know yeah everybody wants a house the fucking butler who likes your cigarettes and you could walk around naked and there's 15 chicks hanging upside down with that mouth open that's all great and fucking dandy but how many of us could really get that none of us so we get the bedroom we got whatever the fuck we want and that's happiness

it's not half the shit that you right now you're young and you're thinking this guy drives this and this guy drives that listen doesn't really fucking matter what you drive at the end because when you're in that fucking casket do you think they're gonna sit around you and go he drove a fucking Lamborghini always like no

they're all gonna sit around you and go what a poop bastard or you are for drinking milk and you got a heart attack fucking somebody on Viagra with the fuck you think I was dumb and that's it and that's that man that's what I wanted to talk about I wanted to talk about the feelings that we get around this time of the year and how for years I felt shitty about him

and at the end of the day they don't matter it's just not your cup of tea and I wanted to talk about prepping for the next year if you ain't fucking prepping you're slipping so please once you listen to this podcast before the weekend starts you've been having some rough times

in your life maybe the opioids maybe a fucking animal died maybe a love one died maybe you got five maybe have to switch careers you know what right yourself out of this chair you don't need to be Hemingway trust me I'm no fucking Hemingway I've written myself out of these jams by just sitting down

being honest with that notebook hey if you scare this I hide this notebook that I have hidden I have a notebook what do you have in your notebook I have shit that I just writing there from time to time I want one person to find it my wife will know how to find it she doesn't know about it but she'll know how to find it

and I've told her about it so when she finds it she's gonna know exactly what it is is it like a diary no it's a notebook that I write to my daughter oh okay it's a book that I write to mercy I try to write there three times a week and I compare our lives

I tell how strong she is how well she's doing I try to tell the one I was doing at my age at that life you know I try to tell different things so she never feels like I feel growing up if something happens to my parents I want her to know who I was through my own words you know

just something from watching sons of Hanukkah you know he has a great idea my copy from sons of Hanukkah I thought it was a great idea then like that you really know you don't hear nothing you you get to read their thoughts reading some of these thoughts are very important you know social media social media

if you there's times I write what's in my heart on social media but there's times I really can't because people lose their fucking minds is it hard to be that honest with with the notebook no you have to be honest with something you have to be honest with something like I said I have the hidden notebook and I have like two other notebooks

and I'm honest with all three of those notebooks because otherwise it can't work I would assume no it will not work when I get home from that set when I get home at night there's one more page I write in my notebook and that's how my day went how my workout went how the podcast went where I want the podcast to go

you know I ate too much fish for dinner but at least you're getting it on paper nothing is more powerful than the fucking pen the power of the pen and I'll sit here for 200 podcasts a year and I'll tell people that the pen is the end of all their fucking problems because it was the end of all my problems nothing really moved forward till I started writing

and once I started writing about the past and reading it then I really launched then I really took off and I and I'm not a dog I took no writing classes in college I took nothing I don't know nothing I know how to tell a story but telling a story and writing a story are two different fucking things so there's times I write like I talk

and I wake up the next morning and it's fucking three pages of garbage because I write like I talk I could writing a story and telling a story is two different fucking things but writing the truth is a fucking huge thing on a piece of paper about how you did about a certain behavior

about something you said about a lie you told once you clear it up on paper somebody's gonna find that someday somebody might not find that someday it doesn't matter you came clean coming clean is good for the soul

coming clean is good to move ahead and coming clean is phenomenal for comedy because you empty all that shit out of your head because once you tend to become a comedian it's like me every day I sprinkle fucking grass seeds in your head and you gotta figure out what works for you and what doesn't if not you'll die of bombings

which you die of anyway you know I did the same thing but this teaches you how to die less bombings by having a notebook you know like I said the artist way years ago 20 years ago was a big hot book there and I asked somebody what it was

that says when you wake up in the morning write a blank piece of paper write your thoughts out write all that babble out of your head I had been doing it already I'm like I can't believe that I've been doing what they recommended here and it works

honestly it sounds like the reason why I like therapy is just to get those thoughts out of your head and you're able to do it just in a different way like do you ever speak it when you're writing it or it's all very quiet it's all in my head sometimes I'll be laying down

sometimes I'll be in a conversation thinking about how I'm gonna write it and sometimes I'll be in a room with my wife watching the TV show and we should be focusing on the show but I'm thinking about how I'm gonna write this thing down that I just thought about and where it's gonna be placed

how do you feel if you don't get to do this generally I'll feel irritated for a few days until I get it out because sometimes I'll just get caught up in the moment like everything else now forget to write it like having a joke before you go to sleep at night

and thinking that you're gonna remember in the morning there's no worse feeling than laughing in bed at two in the morning and going fuck let me turn on the light and write this down and go pfft that motherfucker was so funny

I remember what the fuck I said in the morning and when you wake up in the morning listen I'll give you two thousand dollars if you remember you ain't gonna remember shit unless you write it the fuck down or tell somebody now I just get up and write it down because I've lost so many wars

over not getting up and writing a stupid joke or just writing a key word from the joke or something you know hey whatever whatever floats your boat man we're all different here I do this podcast to let you know it's okay to be fucked up

it's not okay to be fucked up and living fucking denial it's okay to be fucked up and say you know what I'm fucked up I got good days and I got bad days like everybody else that's why I do this fucking podcast just like you guys

we all fucking put our pants on one leg at a time and we all bleed when we get cut so that's it and that's that it's a church of what's happened now on a Thursday afternoon if you're not doing anything tonight tomorrow or Saturday night myself Lee

I'm gonna fucking gay fire ball of death Eric Rocher will be fucking kicking ass up there up at the fucking Levity Live and that's if you're not doing nothing if you got plans you know me you gotta live and let live

I'll catch the next time I do a lot of spots around town but if you ain't doing dick and you're bored and you want to smell some reefer and see how some fucking savages live whether you live in Ventura Santa Barbara Pismo Beach

Pismo Beach come on down cocksuck cause we'll be sparking we're doing a whole fucking thing I'm bringing some special edibles for Lee we got these 500 milligram fucking brownies they're stronger than death you understand me

at least the one that George gave you don't worry about who gave it to me no names you understand me no names you never say no fucking names don't worry about who gave it to you and we got like 10 more that we gotta eat by the end of the weekend you understand me so the rest of the weekend we're splitting

every night 500 milligrams we're going deeper and deeper old school you understand me cause every once in a while I gave up the edibles but this edibles reads with me I gotta be honest with you when have you ever given up the edibles

you just have less I gave up edibles for like 3 months then I ate a piece in Boston what happened to no names? and one night on the way home what happened to what? what happened to no names? no names George showed up no names

and he gave me this and it sat in the closet and one night I was sitting there it was like 9.30 let me buy the bit off I bit a bit off I got so fucked up and I gave it away I gave it to a friend of mine

he told me the next time I saw him he was like Jesus Christ and he found another one and then my man dropped 5 off on me the other day I had to give one to my buddy he got to pay the Vegas and I gave 2 to my other buddy and I kept 2

and then last night he came up my man dropped off a fucking box to make sure we're covered for fucking Oxnard so there's no misunderstandings you understand me thank goodness we wouldn't want that to happen and they even got a little CBD all in there I put a little extra something

it was crunchy at some point I knew you were going to get it I got to hook you up I got to take good care of you don't even ask what I gave you even if you go for the drug test I was going to say I'll just drug test myself they won't find it, they won't be in there

but yo we'll be back Monday New Year's Eve ready to say bon voyage to 2019 it was a good year you got your health you got a friend and you got us man before we fucking check out of here

you know me dog I don't care what size business you got whether it's small, big, 10 employees 12 employees, 20 employees hiring employees is tough you know and you got to be smart with it where you going to get your employee

from job boards that send you candidates that aren't qualified for the road you posted on job boards that send you a mile high stack of resumes to sort through or job boards that make you wait you know listen you know what smart is

smart is going to ziprecruiter.com slash church to hire the right person unlike most other job sites ziprecruiter finds qualified candidates for you it's a powerful matching technology

that scans thousands of resumes to identify people with the right skills education and experience and actively invites them to apply to your specific job so you get the qualified candidates

mucho rapido that means fast because time is money you know that as a business owner that's why ziprecruiter is rated number one by employers in the U.S. and this rating comes from hiring sites on trust parlor

with over a thousand reviews do you understand what I'm trying to say to you you posted job on several online job boards you get nothing you get nothing then you got to sort through the resumes you get nothing and you get the wrong resume

ziprecruiter.com slash church that's the way to go you understand me the technology is the best and right now the church family I'm going to get you ziprecruiter for free

you're like Joey how could this be I got a small business ziprecruiter.com slash church CHURCH if you love the show and you want to support us and help us out

and help yourself by getting a tremendous employee go to ziprecruiter.com slash church that's CHURCH that's ziprecruiter.com slash church we're just talking about you getting your fucking life together it's 2019

when is it going to fucking end and this goes for me too you understand me I get my little slipping points to them I got to lie to you because I do it every other month to give my brain a alpha brain is the way to go

write your fucking goals down get your fucking alpha brain listen alpha brain is so good it's on its flagship supplement it's so good they believe in it that if you get alpha brain they don't help you out it does that

tell me nobody go to honor.com right now and suppress it church boom and get 10% off delivery right to the crib right there no drama no nothing and I'm not talking about just supplements I'm talking about kettlebells weighted vest

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delivered right to your door I want to thank ziprecruiter.com slash church and honor.com slash church for sponsoring the church of what's happened now but most importantly I want to thank you guys for having my back having Lee's back

and that's it and that's that it's fucking Thursday go out there sling some dick do it over the weekend nobody wants to spend the second and the third the fucking January when rent is due in the fucking hospital

because you want to go to a stupid party get your fucking loads out this weekend and mind your business we'll be back Monday morning New Year's fucking Eve 6am ready to rock tip top take this motherfucking mule Lee

go off the hunt and hide just around I don't make smile to the birds and I'm a man I know you got another man but I could love you better than him take my stand don't be afraid I'm gonna prove in the world I say

I'm amputated to love for free so you can please don't have to be when they come along and downpours together I ain't nothing but this little love don't think let me lie to candle calls I'm show all to hunt and hide just around yeah all to hunt and hide

oh baby baby here I am I'm a man on your scene I can give you what you want but you got to come home with me I forgot some good old love and I got some going store

when I get through throwing on you I'm gonna run and back home when they come along and downpours together I ain't nothing but this little love baby don't think let me lie to candle calls I'm show all to hunt and hide just around all all to hunt and hide

oh yeah yeah all all to run and downpours together I ain't nothing but this little love baby don't think let me lie to candle calls I'm show all to hunt and hide just around yeah

all to hunt and hide oh yeah oh yeah oh baby baby baby oh yeah oh yeah

you