Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #735 - Robert Iler

Episode Date: November 12, 2019

Robert Iler, an actor best known for playing the role of A.J. on HBO's, "The Soprano's" and cohost of the new podcast "Pajama Pants" along with Jamie-Lynn Sigler and Kassem G, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio.  This podcast is brought to you by: Stance Socks - Stance has all styles of socks in tons of amazing designs including MLB, Star Wars and Quentin Tarantino. Go to www.stance.com/church and you'll get a free pair of socks with any purchase.    MyBookie.ag -  Use code promo Church to get a 100% match on your first deposit up to $1,000. 

Greetings from podcastville. It's November 12th. The church of what's happening now is brought to you by Stance socks. Listen, let me ask you something Remember christmas morning with socks one of the worst things you could get Times have changed that four pack of white gym socks from your aunt susan. That ain't happening anymore Stance socks are here to rock your christmas morning incredible design And comfort listen you guys know I'm on my feet a lot and whenever I fly I use stance socks Like I had to go to Detroit this weekend. You know, you're gonna be doing some fucking walking So if you're gonna be some walking you might have comfortable shoes and even better some comfortable socks

Stant socks are incredibly comfortable now here it is right now Just for the church family stance has a great offer Go to stanthop.com slash church and you'll get a free pair of socks with any purchase. That's stance grab a pen s t a n c e Dot com slash church to get your free pair of socks because if they're not stance They're not socks the church what's happening now is also brought to you by my bookie dot a g We're in the middle of football season New england had the weekend off. This is your fucking chance to make some money, right?

Thanksgiving's coming. You don't want to show up with a fucking duck day You want to show up with a fucking turkey? You like winning money? You like betting sports? I'll tell you what to put your money down My bookie dot a g why because you play you win you get motherfucking paid now What they're doing is they're gonna double your first deposit today. It's tuesday. Get ready Thursday night the party starts You got mba wednesday use promo code church get a hundred percent bonus on your initial deposit up to a thousand dollars We're gonna get that type of action on a tuesday morning Nowhere, so visit my bookie dot a g today and use promo code church when creating your account to claim your bonus

You play you win you get paid kick this motherfucking meal league Oh Tuesday morning It's a beautiful day to be alive Robert isla Uncle joey And the fucking christ killer Ready to rock

We'll let the sun be down for my face Stars fill my dream I'm a traveler of old prime and space To be where I can be What's the story rob? It's going on man. Thanks for having me. It's great to just see like I told you when you walked in It's like watching somebody grow up in front of your eyes and now you're this man You know, uh, when I booked the movie I went back and revisited the series in the beginning

and Last night we were talking on the phone. It was like I was watching you just being I remember the episode when uh You locked the fucking window and she couldn't get back in that's like episode. Maybe three or something I don't even remember and and Edie took out the machine gun and you locked the fucking laundry room so she couldn't back in that might be the pilot That could be the pilot. It might be the pilot a little young kid. That's 12 years old. How long were you acting before that? So I started I was six years old Uh walking down the street

With my dad and some guy came up to my dad and said hey your son should Do auditions or you know, they didn't know I was going to be fucking short and looked the way I do But they were like you should be uh, you should be a little model or you know, do whatever so My dad and my mom My mom mainly started taking me on auditions for commercials and Shit like that and I booked uh like pizza hut at&t Uh like a whole but IBM like I booked all these commercials and then my grandmother passed away I broke my arm all this weird stuff kind of happened in my life and my mom or we

She decided I guess to for me to stop Uh for a few years and my manager who's still my manager today, which is almost 30 years later. This guy Jeff Mitchell He's fucking amazing. Uh, he would call every couple weeks couple months or whatever and say hey, you know He should get back in he should get back in and you know, we'd be like no no no And then finally when we said yes, I went audition and got sopranos When you got the call it was like five out of ten people Who have you know become regulars and went on to go on the show The first time you got the call I was in new york

And I got a call one day and they go hey, you're dropping off tapes I had this mediocre agent at the mad at manager at the time So he goes you got to drop a tape off in global entertainment Somewhere else and this is show the fucking sopranos And I'm like again I'm not an opera singer. Yeah, like this is the first thing I thought of. Yeah, so guess what? I dropped two tapes off and I didn't drop the soprano tape off. Really? Oh the pilot I was in new york like an april or march and they were looking

And I didn't drop it off and when I see different characters in the show getting interviewed Especially that pilot they were like, you know, sopranos. We're not singers I think james had the same reaction exactly a couple of people Well, I was your when you went and did you even know what you were walking into? No, well, I mean nobody knew, you know, it wasn't a thing yet It was it was just a show on HBO which at the time was not a good thing You know, you wanted to be fucking cbs or mbc or one of these things and uh

But what's funny is everybody Who's on the show thought it was a thing about singers and everything and then when they told them no, it's not singers It's about italian like mafia shit. They were relieved or with me. I was like, oh, that's even worse You know, I probably got a better chance of being a fucking singer because I'm a little irish kid I got freckles on my face and uh, every kid in the audition was like You know slick back hair with the fucking leather jacket and they were all trying to play up the italian thing And I remember my mom was

Even saying like why did you even send him on this? You know, he's he's He didn't look like everyone else at the fucking audition and Every time I cursed in the audition david chase laughed Every time then in the auditions and in the callbacks then in the next one the next one He just kept laughing and I guess that's uh, that's how I got the job I kept I got david to laugh over and over So you were you were 12 you said I was 12 years old when you're that old Like that or I young that exactly like is it like a dream or are you just there?

And is it fun like what is it like because when you're at end all you're like, oh, this is my my dream You're 12 years old. You're in sixth grade or something. It's uh, yeah, you're just kind of doing it You're just kind of go like I remember doing the pilot and being upset and james coming over me Like what's your fucking why are you pouting and I was like all my friends are at camp? You know like it was summer camp time I was like I want to be with my friends at camp and Not here with a bunch of fucking 30 year olds You know sitting around drinking cappuccino or you know, whatever they're doing

Like I had a great time But in my head I'm like, man, I want to be with other 12 year olds and 13 year olds and I want to be You know getting my dick wet for the first time and then seeing fucking what's going on instead of sitting around here, but It was you know, thank god, obviously, you know, because it was the greatest It was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. How many days that were you on the pilot for? uh I don't know it probably but I would if I had to guess I would say Three weeks to it could be two weeks could be a month. Honestly. I have no idea. I know towards the end

They started doing some episodes that would take like six weeks because it just got so like If we did an episode where the whole family was there and we're all sitting around the table and like, you know, the cousin or the It would take a full day for a minute and a half scene because there's Eight people you got the wide shots. You got the close-ups. You got the you got to match the Food. No, you didn't eat with that hand. You ate with the other hand You didn't know you didn't eat fucking you weren't eating pasta at that point You were eating fucking salad you were doing and you got a match and then when they finally get your take they go

All right, everybody go away for 45 minutes and we'd all go outside you'd smoke and cigarettes bullshit and laughing and they would be setting up the lights and the cameras and everything Getting ready for the next person's Close-up and then the next friend they had to go around and do eight of those and they do a wide shot Then they do uh two shots so two people in each thing and There were times where we would have one dinner scene and you'd show up at six in the morning Go till whatever time at night and then you'd be showing up the next day again to eat the same fucking cold chinese food for You know 12 hours and sit but it was

It never I mean maybe twice For for for certain reasons. Did it ever feel like work to me now? So you shoot the pilot You go home you go back to your life Yeah, totally don't think about it. You're 12 You're looking to get your little balls licked. Well, yeah, well pop up about how long till you get the call Well, what actually happened was it didn't happen like that what happened was I got the pilot and everybody in my family goes He's gonna be famous. You're gonna be on a fucking tv show and you're gonna be famous. This is it

This is the beginning And then we went to shoot the pilot and people like tony seriko would be like we fucking you know, we do uh You know five of these every year, you know, we'll never see each other again And then he just fucking shot all my dreams down I went back fucking 12 years old back to my family who we were broke like broke And telling them. Yeah, you know what we thought this was it's not he's a guy they do these all the time It's a show for hb up. People were talking. This is a fucking show for hb Oh, what do you think it's gonna be a fucking, you know a big deal

So I remember going back and telling my family breaking the news to them I know this isn't the the big thing, you know, and then they called and said We're gonna do a season and we did the season and then I remember it never really hit me honestly until I got a phone call and they said there's a billboard with you on it in time square And we fucking my family got in the car And we drove into fucking time square. We're driving through the traffic and we're looking around and we're looking around Look and somebody's like there it is And he looked up and my face was on the fucking billboard in time square and I was like, oh shit

I heard the premiere party was at a pizza place in the village. I think so it might have been a job Like a small Like hbo didn't even think yeah, it was really gonna do anything, you know, like they had another pizza parlor or something Yeah, but but but by the way for then it was like this is like I was fucking wrong I thought it was the great. I'm like fucking free pizza. Everybody's fucking hate. I mean, it was amazing, you know I thought it was uh incredible but hbo I think about the shit, you know, but it's just crazy like I think When I was 16, I because you know, we're talking about where I grew up on 92nd street and 2nd avenue, new york

and I would be On a Thursday I'd be in the park with my friends on a you know, 16 years old like drinking 40s smoking blunts Getting into fucking trouble and shit and then on friday I'd be flying first class on fucking hbo's dime to la to stay in the nicest hotel in fucking la on saturday sunday whatever i'd be on the red carpet of the fucking Awards there'd be fucking, you know, tom hanks and this one and people talking in that and by monday I'd be back in the fucking park

Drinking a 40s smoking a blonde and it was and the crazy thing is is now I look at it and I go this sounds insane We're at the time. I was like Yeah, no, I went uh, I was in la this weekend. Yeah, fucking. I met tom hanks, you know, fucking I met all the cast of friends. I met all the we were all sitting together and having a drink and yeah, they were great You know, I could fucking like There used to be this homeless guy who we'd pay to buy us fucking Uh alcohol like we could get beer but it was hard to get like hard alcohol And I remember like I'd be fucking telling the homeless guy about how I was hanging out with like ray romano the night before

You know, and it's just fucking it was I think about it now and I go That's the craziest shit ever but at the time it was totally Normal, you know, I'd fucking I'd send hbo back the fucking tuxedo that I rent that they rented from wherever for me And then I'd leave my apartment and I'd go to the park and be drinking smoking, you know, three hours later just Like what my buddies hanging out it was it wasn't odd to me at all like I just thought yeah, this is life You know, this is what's going on. I saw how many episodes before This fucking thing just because I didn't I had no idea. I was I'm a comic. I'm on the fucking road

And people are asking me have you watched this show? This is a problem and I'm like no But fuck I was supposed to read to that show Right, you didn't draw the table. So the first time I had was seen it was I was in cleveland And I went back to the room but like a grandma blow and it was on uh The midnight showing because they would always have like a Six o'clock in california nine o'clock in new york and you could watch it again that night, right and it was like maybe

episode five And I was like what the fuck is this And I was coked up. So I really couldn't absorb You know my feet didn't but I knew I got to watch this shit again Yeah, and from there on I started watching and it was By yeah by like the eighth episode right once that was it you guys were often fucking running. You know changed Honestly, I don't remember it ever not

being huge from the day I saw that billboard until You know Now if I go to a mall in jersey, it's fucking they go nuts, you know, it's still crazy But out when I'm living my normal life It's I think there's something about when I do with my fucking facial hair or the way I shave or don't shave Sometimes are my hair that there's some days where it's like People I see people staring at me and pointing at me and coming up to me and asking and then there's some days where nobody fucking You know you go a full day and nobody even looks at you and nobody it's great. But yeah, there was

I because you think about it right eight episodes in would be two months So to look back and try and remember Like a two-month period where it wasn't big but from what I remember as soon as the fucking pilot went it was just It was fireworks. It was crazy. Everybody Everybody loved it, you know, and I was telling David. I don't know, you know, you got banjovi You got Bruce Springsteen, you know, you got Queen Latifah, you got fucking naughty by nature I come out here in 1997. I signed

with an agent And she goes I need a bio And I wrote from New Jersey And this is Bruce Springsteen is already right 97. Yeah, we got Bruce Springsteen. We got banjo We've got all these fucking people New Jersey And I'll never forget her calling me and saying listen I'm changing that Jersey to New York

Didn't you say you went to grammar school in New York and I go, yeah She goes, I want you to change it to hell's kitchen or something. She goes, it's not cool to be from Jersey She goes, it's just not if people really don't And I told David that I go Once this show hit Everything changed now you could put that you were from Jersey. Yeah people are like, oh, shit Like it was that much of an impact like it was that Much of an impact and after that it was off and fucking run it. Yeah, is it bigger in Jersey than it is in New York?

I mean, it's it's the fucking it represents. It's the bible in New Jersey. And they bought it hook line in Sinka because That's your life in Jersey. Wow. Like I can't I can't go into Uh, a deli in Jersey and get back in the car without somebody knowing we're like in New York I could you know, but You know, what's funny too is like a lot of people come up to me in New York And they're like, did we go to school together or did we and I'm like, you're fucking 58 Like what did we go to school? Do you know what I mean? Like people always say they don't know where they know, you know People are like, did you uh

Were you were you on the fucking softball team and this and I'm like, no and I don't tell them You know why they fucking know me but I just and they look and they go, oh man My you know, I got I got somebody on my team look just like you know, they can't recall Uh where they know me from but in Jersey And they don't they don't look at me like, where do I know you from in Jersey? You know the second they see you because I think that there's a lot of people in places where they go Oh, I did watch Sopranos 10 years ago where anybody who likes Sopranos lives in Jersey has not gone 10 years without watching Sopranos

No, no, they fucking it's like it was You know, it was it was they're like, oh, it's fucking, you know, too. I watched I rewatched the whole thing Uh, just two months ago, you know, and they fucking it's great, man. They they love it. It's great. It's crazy to say that My career started because of the Sopranos Because before the Sopranos, I had booked a pilot for CBS As a Puerto Rican bartender in the Bronx was called Bronx County And I booked basketball. I was a ref. Yeah. Yeah, and then

You know, I was going out for big time auditions, but I didn't have the chops But then I went in from mad tv for the Sopranos sketch, right the first time they did it and that blew Fuck up. Yeah, like will sasso is a great Tony Soprano Yeah, we had a great time on and then we were going to do it again You know, the Sopranos kind of stopped us Really? I guess jamie lin was going to host Oh, wow, they were going to let jamie do a sketch with us But I guess the soprano was like, uh, she could host

But she ain't doing no fucking sketch so we canceled the sketch But after the sketch you have to remember that mob culture Just blew up. Yeah You know, I shot maybe four commercials a year and I would walk in and book the thing I knew when I walked in I was booking the thing because I looked just like pussy. Yeah, you know, I've looked just like Penn's oil Fucking seers had a mafia garage commercial. I did a battery Commercial for fucking somebody where we're digging the body up and you left the lights on to dig at night

And we went to start the car and the car didn't start and they're like if you were to use this battery these mobs I mean, I shot 20 nationals that we'd shoot Get paid for and then they go. No the italian american foundation Really made them pull it Bud Light. I did one with what's his name? At the end they ran over his head Frank vinson frank vinson. Yeah, we got taken off I think his lasted the most on everybody's like four of us did different mafia commercials. It was

Amazing the amount of mob action that was in this town. Yeah, I did a movie. You got nothing It was all mob stuff that was just short films that paid They would pay me even though they had no budget They would pay me because I looked like vinson pestle. Yeah, of course It was fucking crazy. And then I went to new york. I was doing the new york comedy festival And georgean's assistant Was in the audience and she came up to me and she goes, are you busy tomorrow? You have to meet this lady. She's gonna want to see you for sure

And I went outside. I was supposed to go to buffalo She walked up to me georgean walking. She goes. Can you believe a A business card upstairs because we're looking for guys like you and I go i'm your 11 o'clock And we started talking I read for gg I read for Sharip is part I read for the cop who's opening up a pizza place now The federal cop that used to Him I just bumped into him. He's opening up a pizza place out here in brooklyn. Oh, wow

Going back to brooklyn. I read for that role And david chase his note was keep sending me everything that you do So then when puss Got killed off the sopranos. He was going to do a show called the mesos about two gay mobsters Really he was developing it a bc got cold feet And got rid of the project they resold it to fox. I did the short film And then I sent that to george and then she called me in for puss's brother

Who was supposed to have four episodes right but they sent the sides to the comedy store I was doing spider-man 2 I was at sony. So in those days you got you had to be home to turn the fucking fax Fax machine, yeah So I went to the store got the sides and the girl spoke to sharip and I think sharipa by mistake Said my friends are auditioning For this thing Because damarera and they called it lack of confidentiality agreement

Really so we got fucking snapped get out of here. Yeah That you know what's funny is like I hear first of all, I think Reason why like I don't have social media. I don't do any of the fucking Twitter Instagram Facebook. I got nothing and like I think about it now and I think about how I think you know, like I see these shows like stranger things on netflix or whatever show and it's like Hey, we're here now. Look, we're eating the fucking this is where we're eating

This is what we're doing. Here's where we're standing. Oh, look, here's the and I think the reason one of the reasons One of the many why sopranos was so good is there was none of that You never saw us sitting around fucking smoking cigarettes laughing in our pajamas because that's what we would do You know, they would say you got a fucking hour or when we would do read through we would sit around it There were no pictures of us anywhere. If you weren't watching me as fucking aj and and and Jim is tony and everybody like, you know, she to people she was carmela. She wasn't putting up Instagram videos every five minutes going. Oh, we're in the kitchen now

We're getting ready to shoot this scene and and I think that It just takes away from the intensity of like how Like I think people watch this show Especially in New York, New Jersey and they were like, no, that's carmela. That's tony. That's not Right now today. I think it's like people know so much more about the fucking Celebrities and then oh here's I'm not I'm having lunch with fucking jake and you know, and we're here and then it's just I think there's like and I think that's why Now everything is shifting to fucking podcasts and actually knowing who people are instead of these

I just think like the intensity of that like I remember somebody coming up to me once and asking if tony hit me and I was like What do you mean? And they're like, well, does he as has he ever like given you a real beating? I go you You watch the show Whatever whatever he doesn't hit me when the cameras aren't on like what are you talking about and they just like They couldn't even understand what I was trying to say like they were just so fucking caught up and like They saw me in the street and they wanted to know if if tony like beat me and I was like it's Whatever whatever you see like I don't even know how to answer them

This guy asked me this question. You know what I mean where now it's like They would see us fucking on instagram every day, you know Hugging each other and laughing and this and they would never ask that question because they would know You know, they would be like, oh, yeah, I saw you and tony went to go get fucking You know the chicken fingers the other day and they would they would never ask something like that now Were you going to school? One when you shut the pilot I mean when you you were going to grammar school, obviously

Yeah, so I was going I went to school up until about Maybe one or two seasons in and then I was working so much that I would show up to school And I wouldn't know what the fuck they were talking about So then I just kind of stopped going and I leaned more towards the fucking Kids who were in the park drinking and smoking and that kind of thing and then Uh, I ended up stopped going to school and hbo got me a homeschool tutor for me to finish out and get a high school diploma So I was just every day I would go to school What I started doing was I was so they let's say I'd work monday tuesday wednesday have off

I would sleep until 11 and I'd go to school lunch would be at like 11 30 I'd go wait outside of my school for everybody to come out for lunch And then I would try and convince people to stay Out and not go back in and hang with me and go to the park and fucking drink a 40 or smoke or do whatever and then uh Sometimes I would sometimes I would end up like having a few beers at lunch would be like I'll fucking go back I'll go back in yeah, let's go say hi to mr. Fucking whatever and it was just You know a lot of times I I shouldn't have I probably should have been walking back in there, but uh, yeah, that was probably I probably gave up on school around like 14

I would say yeah, and then No high school would really accept me because uh, my day's absent was so high You know, I had like a my day's absent was higher than my average in school So my average was like a 56 and my day's absent was like 58 or some shit like that. I forget the numbers, but Uh, so all these schools would just see that and be like no no and then I remember some amazing Fucking school called me. I forget if it was like Baruch or like one of these Schools and they go listen, uh, it was the head of the school the woman calls my my cell phone And she goes or she called my home phone. I guess because I was like I was young

So she she calls my home phone. She goes I want to ask you I'll accept you into this school if you promise me When you're not working you'll give it your all and you'll be the best student you could be in this school and so you don't have to go to fucking MLK or whatever school in new york that that you're gonna have to go to I'll let you in this school, but you have to promise me. I go. I can't do that Because I was like, I'll be lying if I tell you that that's what I'm gonna do I go. I I know where I'm at right now. I'm not gonna all of a sudden fucking flip a switch and be

And she was like, well, thank you for being honest with me And uh, and then I went to like a pretty shitty school and I and you know, that was probably ninth grade and I just never really showed up, you know, I showed up every now and then to I don't even know why honestly, you know, there were just some days where I'd probably wake up and be like I feel like going to see everybody and fucking hanging out on there But I never even like I don't even remember getting fucking grades or them to like it was like I wasn't there, you know and it was like There were a few people in the school who were cool and kind of understood like

You're you know, because the promos was fucking huge at that time, you know, so they kind of understood and I just uh Yeah, after I would say like I never stepped foot back in school after Probably the age of 15 That's like that's like season three season. Yeah. Yeah ish like around there and then they got me a tutor but then what happened was somewhere around like 16 17 I really started going out and partying and then the school just fucking It's it kept slipping

So like I would show up to see her at my even like my it would be a struggle for me to get to my kitchen table Because I'd be fucking hungover I'd be feeling like shit and by like the second hour and she's telling asking me These questions and this and my head hurts and I'm just thinking about you know the fucking Girl from last night and then I'm just like I don't you know, I mean you were living the life man It was great. It was the best show on television You know, you were shooting fucking crazy hours How many months would you shoot it would it take to shoot a season?

Uh, so I sometimes it was six but towards the end it was more it was like nine. I think it started. Yeah It started becoming more and more Uh, maybe like a but then we did I think that I I have such a bad memory, but for this I think we started doing like less episodes As the show went on but they they just became I don't it just I remember taking so long at the end. It was so and I remember like They sometimes they would come to us and say hey listen, uh, you know, you got To you're not in the next episode

You know, you got fucking two weeks off and I remember people like Edie If she if she had very little work or wasn't in an episode would be upset Like they would tell me I had two weeks off I would be trying to hold in my from fucking You know fist pumping and fucking, you know being all excited because I was like, oh shit. I can go party I could just go fucking hang out with my friends for Two weeks and I know I got this fucking the the greatest show in the fucking I have the greatest show to come back to and then I'd be like, all right, you know, I'll see you guys on uh

Call me when you need me and then I would just go and fucking hang out with my friends And I'd get to call like all right, that's you know the script for episode four is out You're in it and I would just fucking go and but like it never felt like work Working with James and Edie and Jamie and that they were so fucking good and every like You you sit and you watch Edie Falco do a scene And then you're like, I just fucking I'm getting paid to be here It's the craziest and the way that I grew up like I grew up really poor And basically I kind of had the thing

Uh where it was like If you do everything right, you'll get your grandfather's job If you do everything right, if you don't fuck up if you do go to school You could take his job, which he was like the super of a building And then go you and then you'll fucking you know in our neighborhood He had he had the fucking great job. He had it easy, you know He would fucking go into work at like 6 a.m. Or whatever Fixed it in the building and then at noon, uh, he would go to the bar to have like a sandwich and a beer

And then he just wouldn't go back to to work. He would just end up, you know, drink it Hey, if you need me and I'll be down at the bar, he'd be a block away But things were fucking cooler back then, you know, this is like The late 80s early 90s where shit was just People weren't watching every movie me because you didn't have a cell phone. They couldn't get to you So they'd be like, oh, where's Bobby and they'd be like, oh, he's you know, yeah We don't know we'll tell him tomorrow and then he would fuck but he showed up every day 6 a.m Fixed it because he only worked the block away, you know

And then he was the super of our building too. So we got to live uh in our building rent-free so there was uh There were a bunch of us living in in the in a one bedroom and there was no door on the bedroom So it was just like a bedroom with the door open the kitchen in the living room and we were just all Fucking in there. So it's like to then Jump to like you said now this You're on the fucking best show ever that like I this show could have stopped at season three and I would have been the fucking success story of

Uh, you know, like it still would have been like, oh my god This the you know, he did the greatest thing at the fact that I went on Seven seasons and people argue. It's the best show ever and all the shit. It's it's crazy to think of How it all turned out when you were shooting this While you were shooting these What did you think of David? I love David. I always love David because I mean, I looked at him as

He's the reason I'm here, you know what I mean? Like he's the guy who gave me this fucking This thing, you know, they're like I was fat and yet I could still get girls Because it was like, oh shit. He's on a fucking tv, you know, like I just I love David. I love the way he was. I always thought he was a fucking, you know, who 13 year old me? What do I know? But I always thought he was just some fucking genius and he was He was the best. He was funny He was always super nice to me. He I remember one time where like I was 18 years old and we were shooting a scene And it was me James Edie and probably Jamie. I don't remember if Jamie was there. We were in the kitchen

doing whatever And I just remember like turning my head and seeing David walk on to set and he went to go watch like on the monitor or whatever And I remember like feeling nervous and that was the first time I was like, oh, shit. Yeah, that's my that's the boss You know, like that because I never I never when we when we went to go do the pilot There was no giant celebrity. There was nobody who was saying, oh my god Can we can you believe blah blah blah is here? Can we get pictures with it? We were all sitting in the same fucking. We'd all sit outside laughing bullshitting. There was nobody was from california So nobody was, you know, you would hear things about people being like, I want the biggest trailer

I wonder there was none of that. We wouldn't even sometimes we've had trailers on set and we wouldn't even go over there We'd be sitting in the basement of the house that we were shooting and just fucking laughing making fun of each other making fun of people Doing whatever, you know, we had to we it was always Just us sitting around having the best time When did you stop going off the reservation? Like you booked it when you were 12 Booked it when I was 12 when you were like, when did you stop partying? When did you get the green light? So when I was like 11 or 12? I think I was 12. I first smoked weed Welcome to new york city. Yeah, I know welcome to new york fucking city

You know what I talk about all the time, which what what makes kids from new york city different than anywhere else It's like let's say fucking Tom lives upstate and he tells his parents. I'm going to ricky's house when he goes to ricky's house He you know who he's gonna see he's gonna see ricky. He's gonna see ricky's mom ricky's dad And that's it. He's gonna see three people when I used to tell my mom. Hey, I'm going to rex's house I could see 400 people On my way from here to just going a few blocks to my friend's place, you know, so you have to You have to learn you have to be always looking at like what what what the fuck is this person up to?

What are they that we're like? I remember when I was like 16 ish I was doing stupid shit and gotten a little trouble and and got uh Moved into my dad's out of the city for a little bit and I remember talking to 16 year olds upstate and being like Where are you? What do you mean? Your mom's gonna drive us to the mall like I don't I can't even That sounds like fucking I'd rather sit downstairs and fucking stare at the wall than sit in a car with your mom She drives us to the fucking mall, you know, because it was like by the time I was 12 It was like we'd be hanging out in fucking staircases and smoking weed and drinking and then So it was around 12 13 14. I was drinking smoking weed and that kind of stuff

But it was still just fun, you know, it was like hey, let's go meet over here and this and then probably like 15 16 became like oh, you know, somebody would because we didn't have money to do other shit, you know, and then around 15 16 it would be like Oh, somebody said they could get us fucking ecstasy, you know So we would save up and try and get it. But then I was probably able to I just had a little more money and everything but around 17 end of 16 17 I started going out to clubs in new york and really partying and just getting whatever the fuck I wanted for free Like people would just come up to me with a fucking handshake or

But it's also around the time where I got arrested and I was in the paper for fucking weed and This so people knew, you know, so people would come up to me and just handshake with a fucking bag of weed and then around 17 Uh, it became blow and I started doing blow and then from 18 to 22 Uh, I was doing blow every fucking time I drank every time and then I would Uh, so I would binge drink I would drink for Three days just doing blow staying up fucking party and everything and then uh I would chill for

Three or four days just smoke weed Take fucking painkillers just kind of like stay in and then at 22 Or 20 maybe 23 I stopped drinking for a year to stop doing coke because like I couldn't stop without I'd be like, okay I'm not doing fucking coke anymore. And then it would be three days later I would be somewhere with the fucking windows painted black and we would just be going for fucking three days party and everything and like I think that the difference with me was like, I didn't have a job. I didn't have responsibilities

I did so it was never like like I like, you know, you do those impressions of those people all the time And it's like that like I would meet people they'd be like, I had the craziest night with you We were out till 7 a 7 a.m I'd be like, what are you? Like I don't even like, you know people think of crazy eyes. I'm staying out till 7 a.m. Because they have responsibilities. They got a fucking job. They got to this I was 18. I had my own apartment I would get nine months off from Sopranos at a time and I would just go all right

I'm gonna go out and I'm gonna drink and one fucking night led into nine months And all of a sudden I'd be getting that call like, all right, we're starting up again I'd be like, oh shit. I just all I did was fucking do coke and drink and go party for Yeah, for the entire time and then Something in me. I don't know what it was. I just let's say I had to work on Wednesday I wouldn't even drink that Friday before Just in case if I drank that Friday started fucking doing blow it turned into saturday sunday monday Then I wanted to sleep for fucking 24 hours and I woke up and I just I didn't know my lines or I didn't

What so like whenever I would have to work I would stop partying or drinking or anything for a long time before You know and then as soon as we would fucking All right, you got two weeks off or wrap a season that was it and it was just Like you like you were saying we never know what's bad, you know, we never know we have a problem So it's like I went from taking three percocets a day to all of a sudden taking 15 and it's like you don't go Oh, shit on tuesday. I took four and now i'm taking five and that And then if it came to the point where I would have a fucking percocet on my nightstand because I would wake up And I would just fucking feel like shit and I would take the percocet and I didn't even drink water with him

I would just put him in the back of my teeth and chew him and I would just fucking lay there and then 15 minutes later I'd be like, all right You know, I could fucking get out of bed now and and function and then I would stay Home for three or four days Smoking weed taking percocets taking xanax watching uh tv playing online poker doing whatever and then I would get the call Like hey, it's we're going out tonight. You know, it's boba's birthday or the end that would be a friday saturday sunday just drink in partying but like

I'm so grateful. I look back now that That it all happened because it's the reason why if I meet some chick today and I get married and everything I could tell her like listen. I'm not going anywhere. You're not gonna I'm not gonna be one of these assholes who all of a sudden took a fucking business trip to vegas with his friends And now he discovered fucking blow and hookers and it like I'm I know what I threw it. Yeah, I know what I want. You know, I know what I want in life it's not that because Even though I stopped doing blow so I stopped doing blow when I was about 20

23 or 22 whatever so I stopped drinking for a year So I go back to drink and I go if I ever do blow again. That's it. I'm not I'm never drinking again And about six months into that I found molly And I was like, all right. Well, it's not blow and then I would just fucking stay up for days I just replaced molly with blow and I would just stay up for fucking three days Doing molly non-stop uh part and you just you know you You just start to be around a lot of people that you shouldn't be around

You know and a lot and especially with my quick it goes, but you don't even one minute You don't even know we in the next minute. It's maximus. You don't even know what the fuck happens We're fucking pills and yep, and you're in and that's what people don't understand you're in How was it once the show ended? Uh, I you know, I wasn't sad about it at all. I wasn't you ready to move on I don't even think for me. There was any sort of like transition like it was like on monday We're doing the show david said hey, we're not doing anymore. Okay Because it was like on one hand

I guess I just thought in my head like Well, I don't have to work. I don't have to take those times off from partying anymore You know, I don't have to fucking clear my head for a fucking three days before I go to work I don't have to now. It's just hang out with my friends. So my manager when I was like 22 23 uh Was like you got to keep working out so problems ending and I was like give me six months or however long I said You know give me a year. I just want to hang out with my friends and I want to fucking party I want to do nothing and then that turned into

Six seven years of just fucking non-stop partying and like People would always just talk about like how do you how do you fucking drink so much and party so much? It's like because then I could go sleep for 20 hours if I want, you know Like I don't have fucking kids with toys banging them in my head waking me up in the morning I don't have a wife. I don't have any fucking responsibilities. I if I don't feel good I want to sleep for 20 hours and then take percocets for three days and the I just had no And I when I went to see help seek help What he told me was the reason why I was having that anxiety

He thinks is because I was just like when you see a fucking piece of like lint floating in the air He's like, that's how you were you didn't know What was going you were just and and even though you enjoyed that your body couldn't fucking handle it your brain couldn't handle it You couldn't you needed some kind of anchor you needed that thing that was going to stop you and make you clear your head for Three days and and go to work and that you couldn't just be that piece of whatever floating around when did you get sober? So when I was 28 my 28th birthday

I went out and I took like 35 mollies and I was fucking out of my mind like I was just I went to go see Concert and I was in fucking Madison Square Garden So I I I show up to my friend's place and I go I'm gonna take five mollies and we're gonna go to this fucking concert And we're gonna have a good time So let's say the concert's at 10. I'm making up times. I don't remember times Let's say the concert at 10 at seven o'clock. I take five mollies and I'm fucking drinking tequila and hanging out So now all of a sudden it's 9 30 and I'm like, you know what? It's my birthday

And I kind of had in my head like I'm gonna chill out after this. I'm gonna but I always did You know, I always had that thing of like like with percussets I'd be fucking taking percussets every day for a year and every night I would get in bed and be like all right tomorrow we're not gonna Take the fucking percussets. We're gonna. So, you know, we're gonna take three instead of taking fucking 12 We're gonna we're gonna and then the next day. I would just you just fall back into that Routine you forget, you know, you wake up you fucking chew one then all of a sudden an hour later You take another one then you're fucking popping Xanax and this

so Uh, we're about to leave for the the concert and I go, you know what? I'm gonna take five more fucking mollies and just be off my fucking ass at this concert And I go there's nobody gonna be looking at me. It's gonna be fucking dark. I had like sunglasses on and a fucking You know a scarf and I'm all fucking, you know, I'm like, we're gonna have a fucking ball and it was like uh A DJ so I was like everybody's gonna be off their fucking ass then we'll go on party after So I take five mollies and then I took like a a bottle like this and it was uh Ginger ale and I put tequila in it and I cracked five mollies in there

And I was like in case I'm in the concert And I feel like it's going down because at the time I wasn't some guy who ten mollies fucking, you know Ended my life like some dad from fucking, you know, the suburbs. I was already taken Numbers like that, you know, if not a little less, but it was my birthday I was like, I'm gonna take a little more So I got this uh ginger ale full of tequila and the molly and I'm walking into the concert and I'm fucking like my teeth They're fucking chattering. I'm I'm fucking I'm feeling good, but I'm loving it I'm with fucking two of my best friends. I'm on top of the world. Everything's great

But it's now when I think about it like I was fucking rocked and I get to the front of the line And some guy who looked like a cop, but he's probably just a security guy He's like, hey and he sees me and then your head for that one second you just go Oh, it's all over, you know, you don't know why you just go. Oh shit He knows or something and I and he goes you can't bring that in and I had the fucking Ginger ale in my hand with the tequila and I was so relieved that he just said You can't bring that in and not you're fucking coming with me or you're under or whatever I unscrewed the fucking tequila with the five mollies drank that and walked into Madison Square Garden

and I was so I'm on 15 mollies and And maybe four hours something like that and I'm in there and I'm just fucking rocked Like I remember walking through the fucking hallways and people have on the fucking glowing fucking lights They and I remember like getting to our seats and people were also fucked up at our seats So they're like high five in this and I'm saying it's my birthday. So I'm saying to these people. Thank you for coming And they they're looking at me like thank you for coming like thank you for coming to my birthday Like I think somewhere in my head. I thought it was my fucking birthday Party the Madison Square Garden with fucking 20,000 whatever 40,000 people ever

And I had a great night that night. We fucking party. We stay at the concert. Everything's amazing And uh, so that's a friday like saturday sunday. I'm still up. I'm I'm taking molly every like hour You know taking a little taking a little I go to bed I wake up and I remember like it was probably four days after that I was supposed to go to a birthday dinner And I remember being like I can't Get out of bed like I remember being like just feeling cold and feeling like shit and awful

And I was like, I think I might have done it this time like I might there might be no coming back from where I like I would fucking Hear something in my hallway and get sketched out like I was just super I was fucked up and uh I remember saying I got to go to the doctor because I couldn't eat anything I would eat I would throw up I'd eat I'd throw up it was just over and over So I go to the doctor and he's like when's the last time you ate a fucking vegetable And I'm like, I don't know you got chicken fried rice. They got peas and in the fucking chicken fried rice I eat I eat that he goes you got to stop what you're doing right now

He goes you got to stop drinking for a while. He goes you got to eat some fucking vegetables You got to try doing some fucking kind of exercise. I hadn't done exercise in I don't know six seven years like any sort of any like even like a walking on a trend You know like I would I actually had a treadmill in my living room because sometimes I would get fat Like I would gain fucking 20 pounds and I'd get on the treadmill on incline and watch a fucking tv show or whatever But like besides walking I had done nothing for so long and he's like you gotta do this gotta do that so That week I remember I I left his office and I went to a place that made fucking vegetable juices And he goes go get it just all vegetable juice

So I go all right I go I drank that and I felt high Like I felt I but because my body had no fucking nutrients for seven days But also like I just I felt good like I was like holy shit like I could keep this down I'm at my body. I haven't had vegetables and who knows how long I feel real good I went to like the park the next day. I meet up with my friend and he's okay We're gonna start fucking doing yoga you should start so I start doing the fucking yoga and that and I'm still Uh taking the percassettes and the xanax and everything But I was like I made the decision then that I was gonna stop doing molly and stop drinking and that was seven years ago

I haven't uh been drunk since then But I was at a dinner like four years ago and somebody gave me a vodka soda by mistake And I thought it was a soda I just said club soda and the guy thought it was vodka club soda because everybody I was with is partying And when I took a sip of it, I realized it was vodka in it And I remember people like freaking out and it was this whole big thing And I became obsessed with like not liking the fact that I

I was that guy like I like oh no, we don't know what could have he's he's he has no control over that He's who knows what would happen if he drank that this so I called up my best friend So I'm 34 now. I met him in preschool like 30 years The name is rex. He's the fucking greatest guy and I go I need you to come with me to dinner And we're gonna open a bottle of wine and I'm gonna have four or five sips of a glass of wine I just need to know what's gonna happen if I I have to live my life differently if For so I just felt this way like if I drink these five sips of wine

It leads to a fucking crazy night of partying and this and I know I'm never gonna drink again Whatever, but I just need I need for myself to know because I was I was laying in bed at night like What if that sip that I took was too big? What if I what if there was more out what if there was more vodka in that fucking glass? Then then there was what if there was straight vodka and I took a sip would I have fucking fallen off? So I just I wanted to know for me and I went to Meet my boy and we had a fucking couple sips of wine and I that was it. It was over. I was like, okay. Now I know I this is I'm not

So weak or you know, and I'm not trying to say that anybody who can't if somebody can't do that that they're weak I just wanted to know am I this week for around alcohol If I have four sips is it gonna take over my fucking mind and and make me do things You know just make me fall back into that same person. I was I really I couldn't shake that not knowing thing and Yeah, so it's been seven years and there were probably have been three instances where at at dinner I took a couple sips of wine. Otherwise. I haven't had a single drink. I haven't I mean, I haven't been drunk

I haven't touched molly or Coke has been around to say like coke was like 23 and I'm 34 So 11 12 years something like that and then uh percocets is less percocets is like four five years maybe five years Xanax took me a long time to get off Xanax is a fucking bitch for me Everything was easy compared to is it like people talk about opiates and I guess obviously the withdrawal from you know Something like heroin is a lot rougher than uh percocets, but What I had to deal with with the benzos is like a fucking

It's just the worst night because how long was the process? Years, you know, it was a really long time because I was taking something like, uh Roughly three million. I would take like a bar and a half every day Maybe like a little bit more And but it just became which is not that I in my head. I don't I don't think anything is a lot You know, but I I feel like that's not a lot But it became six years of doing that every day or seven years or something

and So I had to go see a specialist because I couldn't shake it. I'm like the percocets I figured out on my own the drink and I was like, I'm just you know done everything When with the benzos I couldn't even I couldn't figure out how to even lessen my dose and I'm gonna tell you what the guy told me obviously anybody out there. Don't take my fucking advice. I'm no doctor I'm just telling you what he told me which was The first thing you have to do is get yourself on a schedule Because your brain when when you're you're not on xanax, it's okay

Then you take your xanax and it's here and sometimes you don't take it for three hours So it gets but he's like you have to get on a regular thing. So if you say Uh two hours after I wake up. I take my first xanax, then I take one every three hours and I take the exact same amount So I was like, oh, so that was my first step. Hey, that was my first meeting. He goes just start doing that I go, okay, no problem next time I came to see him. He's like, all right Once you get comfortable with that. He's like you're gonna go less and less Super slow over and over. So you're gonna go from taking point five six times a day To taking uh, you know, half a point two or you however you want to do it

So he gave me for the first time in my life. I had a prescription for fucking xanax, which is crazy Like it took me quitting to get finally get a prescription. I was just getting them on the street, you know and So he goes because I'm I'm taking the bars. He goes well, I'll give you Milligrams so that it's easier for you to quit because if you have a bar It's hard to make point two five out of a bar or point, you know, three seven, whatever you want to do So he gives me these point Point two fives

So I start taking like one and a half point two fives every Three hours or whatever it is and then going to and then once I got really low on the milligrams He goes all right now start spacing it into every four hours Instead of every three hours you're taking it and then you're gonna only do it three times a day in it So, um, I mean this was years of a process. How did it affect your sleep? uh, it wasn't too Bad because I oh, I always kept that one at night like right before bed The problem became what really took me a long time to was the idea of having none

Right, like the idea of lessening it was something I really wanted to do so it was kind of it wasn't too hard It was like, okay trying to quit on my own was fucking insane like I said to you earlier the feeling the only way I can describe it is like if you're trying to quit Xanax for me, it's like if your biggest fear is heights And somebody takes you skydiving and right when they open the fucking door to that plane and they turn to you and go Are you ready? And the way that you feel right there looking out however many thousands of feet up That's how I felt sitting on my couch watching tv like it was just all day that fucking rattling

Fear of it was a fucking bitch to open my front door It was a bitch to get into the fucking elevator like everything was just it was fucking it was torture trying to quit on my own Well, what he told me to do made it a lot easier and then uh My sleep didn't really get affected until it was time for to not do any at all. So what happened was This guy told me uh You're gonna have to eventually not do any and I just couldn't I couldn't do it Like I was like I I can't not take that one in the middle of the day and that one at night Like I feel like I I'm holding on

Too tight to it. I don't know what to do. So he's a guy when you're ready You know the same way you did this when you're ready when you're ready. So I had to come out to la for a little bit I come out and this guy was this guy uh was a specialist and he charged 300 to go see him And after I saw him a bunch I was like, listen, I can't afford to come see you anymore So he's like, well, what I'll do is I'll charge you 150 to come see me. So I'm like, okay So I'm paying the 150 to see him, but I'm also getting the xanax from him. So in my head I'm like, well, that's I'm saving this amount of money by not buying the fucking xanax, right? So

Uh, so he tells me I go I'm going to la for a while. So I come back from la However long I was gone and we have our first meeting and my bill shows up and it's 300 dollars And I was like, oh this guy forgot that we're on a fucking 150 schedule So I hit him up. I go, hey, remember it's it's 150 not 300 and he was like, oh no Well, you didn't see me for a while. You were in la Now that you're back. It's it's 300 And I was like, what do you mean? We agreed on 150 when were you gonna tell me those and I don't know if it's the fucking irish in me if it's the addict in me

What the fuck it is, but I was like fuck this I was like, I'm not taking That xanax tonight. I don't care if I fucking feel like I'm falling out of a plane I don't care if I feel like I'm fucking I can't sleep for fucking three days. I don't give a fuck I'm never seeing this dude again, and I'm not restarting this shit with somebody else And I remember three days later. I'd never touched a xanax ever again So like I said to you, there's times where like I hurt myself in the gym And I'm like, I'll smoke a joint at night or take a fucking hit off a bowl Listen, we for don't fucking count. Oh, yeah, that's how I feel

But I also I don't like to say I'm sober and then somebody sees me fucking buying weed at the store and yeah Yeah, my thing was the alcohol too. Yeah, I could do one drink two drinks When I was 20 once I did three southern comfort now an alcohol and uh, our issues you could rape me. Yep Yeah, I'm telling you the truth. Yeah, I was 20 The first one I could control The second one I can control But the third one we're going to washington square park with cop and eight valium for ten dollars Yep, then we're going to 135 pick up an eight ball and then we're going to stop at 181 and pick up some fucking f 66 express

And we're shooting over the george washington bridge. So For me today reefer is my teddy bear Yeah, that is my teddy bear, right? I could look use both in the air right now And we'll tell you I don't even think I get that high anymore. Right. I get up in the morning and I do, you know Eight bongs at fucking seven. Well, yeah, I've seen the fucking video. I know what you're okay And I do it to get an appetite. Yeah, exactly. Yep. If I don't smoke in the morning I won't be fucking hungry. Yep. It's a drag to eat. So if I smoke

I'll do a protein shake something. Yeah, just so I don't go out and then get sick while I'm driving Right, because if I don't eat I'll get sick while I'm driving. Right. I don't consider weed At all. Yeah, but by the way, there's some people who do and they can't they can't smoke because they feel like that's a That's a game. Absolutely. Yeah, it's a trigger. Absolutely. I get that for me. I needed To keep me over. Look, they do sober October. Yeah, yeah And I spoke to Joe about like I'm gonna be strictly honest with you Do you know when I went off the most in my life when I was told See, I'm cuban and being cuban is

Almost as bad as being fucking irish. Okay. Almost as stubborn as being fucking irish We're even more stubborn than you guys If you said to me Joey, I don't like when the you want to see the doctor because I think you should quit with everything Yeah, that's one thing When you went on probation and they told you you couldn't smoke That's what eats my crop. Yeah, the rule is the one I'll break. So if you come to me tomorrow and go look I'm gonna start testing you once a month You know, we're gonna test you for whatever I'm gonna smoke

It's when you say to me like, yes, they got up. I didn't smoke till last night Yeah, I got up yesterday morning and whatever fucking Omaha And I didn't have papers I had the weed but I didn't smoke and I got home and I got busy and like last night nine o'clock I smoked Yeah, and I was happy. I got a little hungry, whatever, you know, but that's my teddy bear Yeah, alcohol. Let me tell you something. I never liked it. I'll drink it to be social. I'll drink it to Jesus christ There's nothing worse in the world than standing there with a coke with a lime And faking that you're drinking fucking Cuba Libre like I have a fag

Okay, nothing bothers me more than that to have a fucking if you're drinking or you're fucking not If you're not drinking go to home because you're making me fucking depressed It's like when Christopher didn't toast for me. He toast to the reward. He goes, what are you trying to jinx me? You know, if you're not gonna drink go home. Do me a favor. You know those people that go to the bar I'm here to drink a club. So I'll just go home. You're bringing you're making everybody get depressed I always I grew up in the 70s Robert where every tv show If you watch any tv show from the 70 when you walked in like person's house

They had a cart A little cart with two bottles no label. You didn't know where you were drinking. It's like, let me go to the scotch No, they poured and gave it to you. It was brown. That's it. It was brown. Yeah, right It could be whatever in your jacket. Right now we got pussies now people like well, it's got eight calories Right, you know in the 70s boom bombs the heart. I wish I could do that Yeah, I wish me too more three places every day And just have a drink leave them give you drink get a tequila boom and then not not again

Like maybe like it's six have another one I maybe go to a comedy store and I have another one. You know, many times I go to a comedy store I'm like tonight. I'm drinking right get a fucking margarita. How long has it been since you've tasted alcohol? Saturday night. Okay. Yeah. I have two shots of uh, Jagermeister on stage Friday night, but again Doesn't do nothing to me. Yeah, I had two doubles of Jager and it's just for me. It's like I just went over my weight watcher points with sugar That's what I think so it was the blow. It was all That was my world. I love the blow the pill and the alcohol combination the pill like downers. Oh, yeah

I don't like no No way no speed. No, what's that shit? Overall, yeah, I took that once and I remember I was like, I don't even I just feel like I can't sleep That was it. I didn't I didn't like For me perk is like like I said earlier. I loved fucking perk is said I love drinking. I loved this shit but probably I mean, there's a chance That coke is like the thing I did the most of and like I never even liked it

You know what I mean? Like I remember there were times where I'd wake up next to a girl and see her doing fucking wake up doing coke And I'm like, oh my god, like what the fuck is but then you know I would think that was disgusting and not would be around her and then 10 hours later I'd be like, where's that fucking girl's number? You know, like I'd be looking to fucking get because I would I would be fucking six drinks in and like I got to a point where I would drink a bottle of tequila before I'd go out Before I would leave my apartment

So I would I had like those red fucking plastic cups in my apartment and I'd fill it with like I would be sitting on my couch feeling like shit And I'd be like, all right, I'm gonna fill a fucking cup up with tequila Drink it and then by somewhere around the second one when I'm fucking smoking that cigarette And I'm start I put a fucking song on and I start fucking feeling good And then I get I had a place in the shower for my fucking cup of tequila And I'd be in the fucking shower and then by somewhere around the fucking fourth one Maybe I'd start hitting people up

All right, where are we going? What what time are you coming to fucking pick me up? Am I meeting you there and then and by by the time that bought there was a little bit left in that bottle I was ready to fucking go out there I'd put it in a ginger ale bottle or a water bottle, whatever. I would drink it in the cab or in my friend's car but so like I have friends who I've been friends with for 10 years Who think I'm the most social

Like only loved if I could talk to the fucking wall and this where because they only saw me Outside of my apartment after drinking a fucking bottle of tequila, you know Where other like then I have other friends who like lived in my neighborhood who have known me since I was fucking Six years old who are like, oh Rob will sit in his fucking crib for you know Six seven days two weeks Like there's times where he just doesn't come out where I have friends who friends that I knew from going out and from clubs Would would if you told them that um that way they would be like, you don't know Rob He's nothing like that

Because I wasn't because as soon as you start drinking I would want to um I think a lot of my problem my problem was like being around people You know and I soon I would be if I was sober like if you put me right now sober standing in a fucking nightclub I want to blow my brains out So that's why I would have a fucking bottle of tequila and there's nowhere I want it to be more than the club because nobody's fucking talking to you. You're just dancing everybody I know that guy's got molly that guy's got fucking blow that and nobody like When it when it came to percussets and weed and shit like that

I always had to put money up to get them where when it came to fucking coke and molly the amount of money if like If you put the amount that I did Compared to the amount of money that I spent on it It would be Nobody would believe how that's possible because you just go out to clubs in new york and everyone's got it Everybody's giving it to you. Oh, hey, you want some fucking molly? Here's this and then all of a sudden you're in somebody's apartment for fucking three days

And there's a fucking plate of just a mound of fucking that one's coke that one's ketamine that one's fucking molly And you're just fucking hanging girls are coming through You're laughing you're fucking partying music's on the neighbors are fucking complaining banging on the walls and you're just You're having the time you've smoked 140 cigarettes you don't you're fucking in oh, I love what is this chair made out of you know, you're just fucking everything's It's amazing and then three days later I'd be the guy who's not leaving his couch for 10 days that if you told those people that that's how I was they'd be like No, that's not that's not rob. He's he always wants to fucking

You know, he would be the fucking head of the the Thanksgiving Day parade throwing a fucking Baton in the air because that's how it was when I was drinking. I always wanted to fucking Party more more. No, let's not go to bed. Let's just we're like When I would be on fucking pills in my apartment I didn't even want more than two people in there because I'd start to get fucking Crazy like oh, where are they? You know, where is he ashen? Where is he that you know, like that whole thing where when I was if I had drinks and it would be like

You could put that out on my fucking forehead like you could fucking throw cigarettes on my floor like I don't you know You just it's it's crazy how it How it all fucking works. Who's Robert Eilert today? I go to the gym five days a week. I eat Super clean More reliable, you know, like I used to be Like I remember there were things for my family just not showing up when you're addicted. You have no When I was addicted I was not I could tell you I'll be there Friday. Good luck. Right. I don't know how I'm gonna feel

What's gonna happen Thursday night? So there's no I've told me a thousand times I was still still doing coke this podcast would not be intact because There's just no way you can't control your life Yeah, and there was no you're gonna go and then Friday you'd want to do it and then fucking Monday you'd hate it You know, you'd be like, I don't want to fucking be sitting in that room and there or like you fucking have it's just Do you want to act today? How do you feel about all you've done? I don't enjoy the

I hate fucking reading scripts. I hate auditioning. I hate that whole part of it. So it's like I went like I thought for a long time. I was passionate about acting but really I was passionate about doing sopranos I loved it. I would like I stopped fucking drink it for it. I stopped doing drill like whatever When that time would come and it was never like fuck. I gotta stop this guy. It was like, no, this is how it works Like I get to do this like I loved Doing that work. I loved hanging out with those guys. I loved all of it where now like The idea of like some agent is gonna send you fucking four scripts and you're gonna sit in your apartment and fucking read them and maybe like that where it's and like I don't want to do a tv show because

I don't like the What they might tell you you're doing in a year. It might have a totally unpredictable where it's like I have all of these like Things I don't you know, if they were like, you're gonna be fucking Smoking or you're gonna be fucking, you know, smoke a cigarette or we want you to eat this one And I don't want to be a difficult guy who's like, hey, actually, I don't eat that anymore. I won't smoke a cigarette I don't want to be fucking doing this and that so Uh, that's like I love fucking you. I love Joe Rogan. I love the fucking bobby lee tom sagora. So that's I moved out here to start a podcast and hopefully that'll be uh

That'll be the thing that I'm doing I gotta be honest with you How the fuck do you follow this? Oh, it's crazy. How do you go into a cbs show today? And fucking bum fuck johnny director comes up to you and says for this thing. How it's You worked with the best. Yep, you came from an environment that was healthy. Listen last Not ashamed to say this about two years ago

I did two episodes of the show for greg garcia First one was great. I walked in I was the second scene up and I left The second time I went to shoot the same show. I had the first scene up And basically the last scene at 10 o'clock at night So you're there from nine in the morning you do your one hour and then you wait Being in that room with no windows made me crazy. I love I love greg and I acted like a fucking asshole Yeah, and when I left there that night I went home and I I blamed on the anxiety and the no windows, but really what it was it was like

I just don't think I want to do this anymore Yeah, when I got the call for the soprano movie that put the audition on tape I didn't think about it again when they called and made the offer I was thinking about not taking it like I heard you talking about Tom pop I had a comment and say take the fucking thing When I was there just being after the first day of watching what

David chase was about like I was trying to improvise. Yeah, and somebody came over and they're like Knock it off. Yeah, and I remember there's all this air You know That's when it all came to me. I went I went left there I went right back to the room wrote the three joints one outside smoked one and I think I worked a day and then I had like four days off For those four days. I just immersed myself with the episodes

Just to see his style. Yeah, and the second day I went in there. I was like now. I'm ready mentally For David chase. This is something that I've never seen before. Yeah, and I've been a comic for years You know, I've worked with some great directors at that moment. He blew everybody out Once I saw what he did that first scene I shot. Yeah, I was like I'm paying attention to this guy To the fucking letter from now on if he says sneeze I will sneak, you know, yeah, I didn't eat nothing in that movie either. By the way, I hate that shit too Yeah, they asked me to smoke a cigar. I think I smoked one of them, but

lunch Like right now somebody offered me a mob movie a few weeks ago and I was like No, let's see what what the thing is is A lot of what people don't understand this industry is like If you're putting all of your shit aside all the shit you want to do Or how I really want to be and I got a fucking focus on this thing and I got a what But you know, it's something that you think is going to be fucking incredible. It's different than Trying to put your whole fucking life aside changing the person you are everything for some show that might be okay

And while you're shooting it, you're like nobody watches this When they come up to you and go, excuse me when the scripty comes up to you and says, hi Hi, the word is that instead of ah, and you know, yeah, does it really matter? You gotta be retarded to watch this fucking show You know, who gives a fuck between the and what was great about Sopranos with us is You know by season four or five people would be like, how did you prepare to go? Dude, it's like you walk into the Sopranos kitchen and you see gym pacing and sweating and you see edi banging her nail You know, she had those fake nails and she'd be banging them on the fucking counting that's it

You're there, you know, we're like We were a fucking Some sort of a family, you know as soon as you went back in it was all the things were there You there was the place where you sat and you had your thing and like They never told us any of that stuff like you got to stay this you got to stay on script You have to do this but we would see it when other people would come in, you know, so we would hear You know like we would do something off And nobody would say anything but then they would make like one word wrong and somebody come over to them

And then we would find out later like you you know, you're sitting around you having a drink and they go Oh, yeah, they told me like, you know, I said this instead of that or this instead of that And then you're going man, not only am I getting paid to fucking work on the best show ever But I also have some sort of fucking seniority where these people like I I could fucking They don't come up to you and tell you hey, you know, you fucked it like of course the director would come up to you And give you direction until you show it but nobody ever said Hey, you put the fucking you said the instead of then but they would say it to fucking other people, you know And and you and you see that a lot you see people come in for three days and they're fucking shaken and people are all nervous

They're like, oh, we heard that that people are real strict around here And then we would tell them no nobody's fucking strict around here everybody's cool So then they'd get all loose and people would come over, you know and be like hey you said The instead of then and they'd look at us like I thought you said we'd be like hey, you know, we yeah, it's fucking yeah It's not What did you learn from jim? So much, you know, I mean just from the the acting that I learned from watching him, you know, because I've talked about it before where like I don't think I was ever a great actor, but I think the actor I was from season one until the end

I think I did grow. Yes, you grew dramatically. Thank you dramatically and I think it was from James and Edie watching that I mean, it was like I felt like I was watching the two like greatest actors. I've ever seen All the all the time like you just show up and you see what they do and you see why Why they do certain things and how they like, you know, like It would be more so like You'd watch edie and then she'd fucking come by and in the scene

She would just come and like rub her nails on my back or like something like that and it would be those things where I go Oh, shit. That's she wasn't she was there. She wasn't what's the next fucking line or where do I put this down? She she saw the fucking look on my face and felt like she needed to put her fucking, you know nails on my back and let me nothing it's it's great, but Really what I learned from him also, uh I think in la especially or there's a lot of like this outward like we support Whatever, you know, we're we're we support your decision too and standing from the fucking rooftop and screaming how good of a person you are

what you support and I remember I don't remember if it was Jim had passed away already or what but I remember my manager coming up to me and telling me like, you know, he calls me And I'm like for what do you mean? He calls you and he's like he calls me And he tells me not to tell you that he calls me, but he asks how you're doing What type of people you're hanging out with what you're paying for fucking rent like to make sure that you're not You know spending fucking 10 grand on some penthouse in new york city being an asshole and he wants to know All this stuff about you and he told me not to tell you

And I think that's the opposite of a lot of like This bullshit of like we love each other and you know, there were never like, you know Like you see now instagram and the shit of like we're so close and we're so the rip john with his phone Yeah, and you're like And that's the thing is like there would be fucking some people from There there was a thing that you felt on the show where it's like, you know why there the reason is nobody's a fucking asshole on set Nobody's an asshole on the show because if you are david can kill you David could end it all you want to come in and act like you're a fucking big shot because you you won some

Fucking award last year or you or people are telling you your your character is the best your character is the best And you want to come in and request some kind of fucking trailer or that it's like Somebody will put fucking two bullets in your head in the in this fucking show and you're not on the show anymore So nobody Ever if anything we'd all be in fucking one person's camper, you know sitting around laughing there was no And I think a lot of that was also jim jim jim never let if anybody's gonna be asking for shit It's him and he never did he never said hey, I want this this thing. So everybody kind of you know, you follow

You follow the vibe on the show example Yeah, for sure. I gotta tell you somebody eddie I always knew eddie was a good actress But when she became when I saw her as a dangerous act action actress Was when jim got shot That scene when she's crying in the hallway She takes you there. She's unbelievable. She fucking took me there She took me there. Like, you know, like I I know it's like when uh

Sean penn when he finds out his daughter's dead in that movie. What's that mystic river? Yeah, yeah The noise he makes that somebody who lost somebody that's A tough recreation noise to make You know eddie had her moments I think And I could say this listen. I miss charles bronson. Good picture. Look at him The second guy I miss is james gambler finney never met him Yeah, never met him. I could tell you that I miss him on tv

That movie he made with hearty towards the end Okay, the game was a game or something like that. Yeah I remember seeing him there and going how much do I fucking miss him from the sopranos Like the sopranos because it still kept going and I think it would have lost no fans. Yeah, you know, you were on One of the greatest tv shows of all time I mean not no bullshit fucking friends or fucking i'm talking about A show that changed the fabric of society, you know Ricky and fucking desi type shit. Whatever his name is desi and lucy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't have hbo growing up

But I remember the night that the finale aired. I literally heard I was living in ball. What year did the finale air? 10 years after so, uh, I guess 1990 2009. Yeah, I was living in boston And I knew my friends were watching and I heard people when when black heard people Like I literally heard people I'll never forget that A lot of people thought they cable went out. I was like what's going on I'll never forget that. I was like what and then I went on facebook and I was like, oh shit and then

The one thing I wanted to ask you was because it happens a lot but Like you you went from a kid and then towards the end of the show because I watched it later You weren't like like you your character was not the most liked character at all. Yeah What is that like the people like start hating you or did people have a bad weird reaction to you when you were like not a As much of like a oh, he's not that little kid anymore Like you know, it's funny. I feel like that's more like an online culture thing where people are like, fuck you You suck like walking around in new york city. Nobody ever fucking says that shit

You know nobody people are just happy to see you and they want to tell you they love the show and and this so like I mean there were there were definitely people who would tell me like man I fucking hate your character and I'm like and especially people who would meet me like Hanging out and partying they'd be like man. I hate your character But you're fucking nothing like that, you know piece of shit or that little fucking nerd or whatever, but I remember like Doing interviews and saying I get it because I see it like I want to smack him in the face sometimes Like I want to fucking grab him and be like, what are you?

You know like you fuck, but that's that's the whole fucking point of you know, that's what people want to That's the shit that You know that Tony sees it himself that he fucking hates about himself. You know that fucking You had some great scenes Robert The scene when she gets hammered And he brings her back and you're like like go upstairs AJ and you're like she's doing ecstasy But I gotta go upstairs When you put the fucking thing under the crook of your arm

When you weren't we're gonna go to the military academy and you had to come down Oh, you sold it Robert you sold me you're like you had this look on your face like you want to fucking shoot yourself Yeah, yeah, you sold it. There was so many scenes when you went after You know carato when you went after him Watch outside. Yeah, that was a fucking tremendous scene when you and Jim Lee Told you about you know, you always say you're a hypocrite fucking Michael. You know, it's funny. It's crazy that you brought that up That's the only scene I ever felt I did good. That is a beautiful scene. That's the only scene I ever fucking

No, no, that was that was like, you know You were seasoned by then and you were used to him, but that was a beautiful scene That was a real father and son scene, but you had uh all When you're changing the flat That's a fucking great scene. I don't remember and he goes AJ You loved your uncle Jackie or some shit and then he he goes What do you know about me and you were like hesitant? You're like, I don't know whatever the kids say It was good. I don't remember that at all. Yeah, you're changing the flat and he's like drying his sweat off and you're just a little kid

And he goes AJ, what do you know about me? And you're like, I don't know. It's his uncle Jackie's Stole money from the unions or something He goes, you know, your uncle Jackie loved you like all those scenes you sold Robert you sold. Thank you. Yeah that all the crack call Oh, that's a crack call right right you hit the black neighborhood and that all those scenes You know, even jamie lin. Yeah, jamie's fucking great when they went up to Booten and he fucking Chokes the guy

And he's talking to her in the car and he's like, you know what I do and it was uh, if you've noticed I'm surprised that they even did the irishman Because I haven't seen you. You saw it. No, no, not yet because three and a half hours. I know three hours. Yes That's good. It's good for your asshole But it was such a show that covered so many Like the mob world could never recover again the mafia genre and movies never really Took off again for 10 years

Well, it's hard to when we had 10 years to develop a character It's hard to then have to do it in fucking two hours You know when you're fucking When when you when you've been watching a show for fucking five years and then that's six seasons coming on and you got everybody in the Fucking living room and the static from the hbo comes up. It's hard to recreate that because How do you get people excited to walk it to turn on the fucking tv? You know now everybody's so fucking everybody's a critic thumbs up thumbs down. I like that. I don't like that There was no if you don't like to show get the fuck out of the room. That's how Sopranos was

It was like we're gonna watch Sopranos if you don't like it get the fuck out There wasn't no You know, oh, I know i'm giving it fucking four tomatoes or wherever people are fucking. Yeah It's like people were just and every and that was the thing it's like I think a lot of people in jersey Just fucking loved it for what it was, you know, there was this book. I was fucking reading about The mastery of love and it talks about I'm reading a lot of these books now because i'm all fucking, you know, i'm trying to get my life together and be a

Fucking adult and care about people and the uh What it says is like, you know, it's like let's say you say like I love new york When you think about new york, you love it and that's it. You don't try and fucking change it, you know Where with people you go, yeah, I like that person, but they fucking, you know, they do this I don't like that. It's like you just have to fucking accept it. I think that's what people in fucking jersey did They were just you could you could they didn't go. Oh, well, I like it But you know, he wouldn't wear his hat like that. It was just we are fucking we love the show

We're all in they never came up with the Like I feel like now these fucking movies are made and every fucking person on the internet is like you in that third See they shouldn't have ended it that way or that I mean, obviously people hated Some people hated the ending of Sopranos, but besides that I never heard anybody come up to me and try and fucking Critique it or say, you know, how come why didn't why didn't they do it this way or that people just I love the show You know, that's what people would say two of the shows that spawned from the Sopranos were breaking bad. Obviously And sons of anarchy Yeah, there's a thread that somebody sent me one time about sons of anarchy because jack's tell away sneakers

Right He was white sneakers bikers Fuck it. Hey Well, somebody came up to james ganolfini Uh, who was a legit fucking but like We'd meet these guys all the time who'd come up to you and go. Hey, hey, you know what you do on that show That's what I do in real life

I mean, so you're you've made it to fucking 40 by going around tell telling people you don't know that like us like you just Fucking really, you know So you meet a lot of people who pretend to fucking do whatever But jim met one guy who was legit and he didn't he didn't say any i'm doing it. He came over and he goes. Hey, he goes, uh Wise guy, he goes he would never wear shorts. Don't do that Don't don't wear the shorts And then I remember jim went I think jim went to david and told him He's like, I know what the what the I know I felt what this guy was saying, you know, you mean Carmine lupa tazzy

went James Tony on the show and he goes I heard that john Went up the house where barbecue last week and he goes. Yeah, why he goes a boss never wears shorts and he turns around And james is like what the fuck is he saying? You know, yeah, because david david would take shit, you know like I david's a fucking genius He doesn't need me to do anything But there were times in your life where you'd show up and up fucking

You know there was a time where I was crazy about like slayer and pantera and just fucking smoke a weed and listen to heavy Metal and go on the concerts and then the next episode I was fucking skateboard and listening to fucking pantera and this and it was like, you know So he would he would take shit from his own life, but also from fucking Hanging out with it Like there were there was shit that he took from tony seriko that like if you watch tony seriko for fucking three days You're coming upwards that you know, like we would go away on a trip with tony seriko for three days And you're just it

He would come up to us on red carpets and he would have a travel bottle of obsession He always smelled like obsession and he would pour it in his hand And then smack you like on the face on both sides and you would just fucking reek Reek the entire night for and people, you know, you're meeting celebrities and they're coming to give you a hug or a Can they're like, jeez this fucking guy smells like a fucking bottle and then Actresses would also come up to us and tell us He hugged me and I smelled like him for the rest of the night, you know And there was so much shit that he like I remember one time we were doing

Like I think the dvds were coming out and like the wiz wanted us to to sign dvds So the first couple of people come up and the guy's talking to me, you know How are you? How's the show? But he's talking to me for like five minutes or whatever and there's a line of fucking hundreds of people But i'm not going to tell this guy like hey, you can't talk we got to do all these people So I just sit there and I answer his questions or whatever and he walks away and tony seriko Fucking puts his hand up to the guy who's sending people our way and he puts his hand up and he looks at me He goes rob it

Sign them and send them because that's it and he would do shit He had these one-liners all the time that if you just stayed around him enough the shit that he would say And I know there's there's gotta be I didn't watch the show So I don't know what poli walnuts says on the show But I guarantee you there's a percentage of that shit that just when david would be around tony seriko because you hear him Say stuff and it was fucking hilarious. He was so He was unbelievable. He he he came to my fucking confirmation in real life in the fucking What is that three breasted fucking double breasted shoot with the foot?

Yeah, the whole the hair fucking slipped back with an envelope full of money like there was no It was it was crazy man. We were and people People who were in my family were at my confirmation and they're like that's you know, that's poli walnuts, you know, nobody's going Oh my god, there's fucking tony seriko like there's fucking poli walnuts and then you had people Who were the opposite of who they were on the show like fucking edie? You know, you meet edie somewhere and she's just like Super just nice Woman with her dog and she's like really friendly and understand and really friendly

Yeah, just so like sweet and this and then she'd go into the hair and makeup camper and come out to whatever hours later with the fucking long nails and the big hair and the the uh, like uh Armani fucking matching outfit with the gold chains and then and you're like, holy shit That's the opt like tony seriko wouldn't let people do his hair He came With his own shit done. He wouldn't say he's he would sit in that hair makeup chair Like there's someone new he'd be like there's a rule in this place. You don't touch this and point at his hair He's like you don't fucking touch my hair. You know, it was it was crazy. It wasn't like

Like you said it was like if I don't know what my life would have been like now If if I did got some fucking like disney show when I was 11 and I don't know Yeah Because people people meet me and jay me sometimes together and they're like god Like it must have been so crazy and it's like The cool part was was we lived our life because no fucking 15 year old knew what Sopranos was I could go fucking walk around and hang out with people my age all day. Nobody would say a fucking word Nobody said anything and then as soon as we'd be we'd go to a fucking store

And then somebody would be like, hey, aren't you you're over there on the fucking cover of the fucking tv guide and you're just like You know, yeah, let's let's go back to the fucking Park and I still sometimes I still can't you know that I'm like we got paid To be on what people say is the fucking best show at there's times where I still I wake up in the morning And I'm like, I just think about how fucking grateful I am For it and how you know, I told you when we spoke on the phone last night I I there's no doubt in my mind. David chase saved my life There's no doubt in my mind because I know the first time I took a fucking percusset what it felt like

And if if I didn't have when I quit doing fucking drugs and all that shit if I didn't have This on the other side if I didn't have like I fucking just moved out to la started a podcast I I got a fucking apartment. I did all this stuff because Sopranos, you know, it's like all this Freedom that I have and this kind of thing where it's like if I didn't have that if I had my fucking grandfather's job And I don't I don't know It wouldn't I don't think it'd be good. I could be wrong, but I just I know

You know, there's times where you're fucking taking 15 percussets a day and somebody fucking who's giving you those percussets goes You know heroin is fucking a lot cheaper and it's not as but but I would go to well I got checks coming in, you know, I'll stick with the fucking percussets. Thanks. Where who knows what would have happened if fucking You know some some when I if I was fucking 18 and had my grandfather's job or fucking whatever I dropped out of school and fucking hated my life and somebody said, hey, you know heroin's fucking cheaper I might have been like, yeah, well, I only got fucking 10 bucks on me. So I guess that's What we're doing tonight and I might not I have no idea, but I just what's the name of the podcast

That's called pajama pants. It's you and Jamie me Jamie Lynn and our friend Kasem And I just wanted to be like this I wanted to be shit you talk about in fucking pajama pan your pajamas and fucking sitting around and laughing and telling old stories making new stories and just uh We're about 10 episodes in and I'm I'm so fucking happy to be doing it because it's like I found in later years with me and Jamie Uh, we always kept in touch, but every time we would see each other it would be catching up You know and then by the time you're done fucking catching up with somebody and then you leave and then you see them

A month or three months later and then you're catching up again So it's so nice To see guaranteed to see like I went to her house last Sunday to watch football and like we're hanging out and stuff But to guarantee every week. I know I'm gonna see her for an hour or however long we fucking talk for and bullshit and we could really get back into each other's lives like I was living in New York that I moved to Vegas and she was always out here and she's got her kids and everything and like We're like a family, you know, she's like a sister to me and her not being in my life Uh, I felt like something was missing and it's great to have her back in and it's

It's also great to be telling her these kind of stories because there's a lot of them that she doesn't know because she's so innocent and so fucking Amazing and sweet and pure that I would never tell her like back in the day Like yeah, I'm on fucking day three of fucking doing blow in some place with fucking garbage bags on the windows And I you know, we haven't lend and I would just say to her like, yeah, you know, I've been partying a little You know, like nothing I didn't want I didn't want her to feel bad I didn't want to put Anything in her head

So now when I sit and we have microphones and I fucking tell her these stories and we get her real reactions for the first time and we're just It's there's a little bit of therapy in it. There's fucking great catching up. There's we just Laughin it's it's everything it's getting then it's like we had like drea demateo on so it's like getting to catch up with her and talk about the fucking soprano stories and this but then just you know, there's some episodes where We go 30 minutes without mentioning sopranos at all. It's just It's all I love it. I'm so happy I moved here and I hope uh, I hope this is like the next chapter in my life You know, I hope that's that's you know, you say like who are you now? I hope it's a healthy guy who's moving in the right direction and has a fucking podcast that's uh

You know, that's that'll be keeping me uh keeping me going because like I said to you it's People tell you you got it. You got to do something creative You got to do something creative and you're living in new york and you're like every What walking down the street go into the deli order in a coffee Then go and meet my friend and fucking wash in squirt park and then you walk in here and then go and take in a fucking boxing class And I don't feel anything's fucking missing and then I lived in vegas for two years and I felt like my my fucking All of my organs were out of my fucking but like I was like I just felt like I was again maybe that piece of fucking Lint floating in the air like I was just like man, there's and I would meet people at the poker table who

Never Didn't know Sopranos anything and they would just hear me fucking talking to somebody and they'd be like oh man You should fucking write a book or you know, you should just so like it pushed me back into thinking like yeah I do have to do something creative because it also gives me There there is a part of my life that I feel like is missing when I'm when I'm not doing it, you know and you go and and vegas was just you know, I took up gambling for a long time and uh

The last 10 years basically all I've been doing is is playing poker and I fucking loved it and I just I hit a wall I got to the point where I was like I can't go sit at a table with eight strangers every day anymore Like I Now that I'm so like I used to just take perks sets and you could fucking you sit anywhere You know, I could sit on the fucking tournament in a plane for six hours and people would be like Oh, we gotta get off this plane and I'd be like why you know, we're fucking to be the same as I'm sitting in my lip but uh When now that I'm sober and when I'm sitting on that fucking in that table with eight strangers

And they're talking about stupid shit that makes me want to fucking flip the table over and you and by the way one day It's fine. But when it's your life and you're going all right It's fucking Monday. It's time to go play poker and then you're like, oh my god I got to go sit with these guys for fucking eight hours and it's just torture and I stopped Enjoying the game. I stopped studying like I was always studying poker and I was part of these like poker academies And I was really fucking into it and I loved doing it and I was making money in this And I just saw it all falling away because I couldn't I couldn't handle Being around these people every day and it's it's like why I don't want to do a tv show because it's unknown

You know, I I'm going to sit at a table with eight people. I don't know what the fuck they're gonna be talking about some people are fucking It's just you you hear in the same stories over and over and the same kinds of pen they're talking about their night last night in Vagan and I just hit a wall, you know, so I called up Jamie and I called my friend custom and uh Hopefully this is this is the next chapter of my life Well, man, you got an open fucking door here anytime you want to come up and talk shit your family here Yeah, you're the first person to have me on their their podcast since I got some I really appreciate you having me

Of course a girl for you. Thank you. You want or whatever. I would love that You know, if you want to stop by uh the improv tomorrow, I say hello to joe for sure We'd love to shake hand. That's awesome. Yeah, you want to do but yeah, man Uh, I'm a big fan. Thank you that you got your life together Listen, you're on the best show of all fucking time. You made your mark and you like Tony Montana You made your mark and you enforced it. Yeah Let me read some man. Do not forget. Thanks again, man. Miami's sold out But town hall December 6th

They added a second show and I still got motherfucking tickets real quick Let me ask you something. We're in the middle of football season. All right. You like winning money. You like betting sports I'll tell you where I put my money down. You ready my bookie dot ag If you're trying to bet on the nfl mma UFC chinese ping pong whatever the fuck my bookies got it They got the better incentives and more lines than any other sports book Period. I've told you once I'll tell you again. This year. They're running a super contest A hundred miles to enter you pick five teams a week against the spread you rack up the points first place is guaranteed

A hundred thousand fucking dollars. All right. They just revamped the site and it's looking fucking tip top magoo So go take a look if you haven't already and listen, it's tuesday cut the shit We're gonna double your first deposit right now. You like joey. What's that? If you put in a nickel, we give you a nickel use promo code church ch u r ch They got a hundred percent bonus on your initial deposit up to a thousand Dollars so go to my bookie dot ag today bitches. That's my bookie. My b o ok ie Dot ag

And use promo code church my bookie you play you win you get paid. Listen If you're still wearing those fucking socks from k martin and those other Dumpy fucking places with holes. You're making a big fucking mistake. All right Stance socks are here to rock your fucking christmas incredible design and comfort unique styles You can't get anywhere else and if you want to show a little love to yourself or the people in your life Give them the stance now when you show a little ankle. You're also showing off what makes you special Whatever you're into they collaborate with the best of them star wars socks holly davidson socks They even got grateful dead fucking socks neck clean

They're not like fucking dirty grateful dead socks just designs So every football baseball and basketball team you got that on there too Stance socks are incredibly comfortable I got them on my feet. I'm on my feet a lot and like I told you in the beginning when I fly I put these motherfuckers on I got the icon socks for myself And for my wife, I got some cute little ankle socks that she likes And even I even got the flying juice some nice blue socks That say good vibes just to remind them of what's important in life cocksucker. So do me a favor

stance makes a great gift right now For the church family stance has a great offer Go to stance.com slash church and they're gonna throw in a free a free pair of socks with any purchase trust me You're gonna love these fucking socks. They're nice and comfortable tremendous Like I said, I use them when I fly when I got to walk around airports and it just is uh, it makes my feet feel fucking tremendous That's stance.com s t a n c e Dot com slash church to get your free pair of socks because if they're not stance They're not socks. I want to thank stance. I want to thank my bookie. I want to thank my main man, Robert Eila

I want to thank the christ killer, but most importantly. I want to thank you cocksuckers for always having my back And the whole thing do not forget december 6 10 30 tickets still available and that's it and that's that I want to thank you again, brother You're a fucking cheat. Thank you. I want to thank you again my little savage And like I said, most importantly you motherfuckers at the house See you thursday morning tip top magoo. Stay black. Kick that fucking muley You don't I want to be around

To pick up the pieces when somebody breaks your heart Some somebody twice as smart As I For somebody who Will swear to be true as you used to do with me Who'll leave you to learn that misery loves company? Wait and see I mean I want to be around

To see how he does it when he breaks your heart to bits Let's see if the puzzle fits so Fine And that's when I'll discover that revenge is sweet As I sit there applauding From a front row seat When somebody breaks your heart like you Like you

profile