Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #745 - Joey Alvarado

Episode Date: December 19, 2019

Joey Alvarado, a Jiu Jitsu coach who holds a Black belt under Roger Machado and the creator of the kettle-jitsu program, joins Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt LIVE in studio. This podcast is brought to you by:   CBD Lion - For all of your CBD needs, from shatter to gummies, go to www.CBDLion.com and use code CHURCH for 20% off.    Athletic Greens - Get 20 free travel packs worth $79 when you go to www.athleticgreens.com/church   Policy Genius - Policy Genius helps you compare and find the right home, auto, life or disability insurance for you. Check them out at www.policygenius.com  

Greetings from podcastville the church of what's happening now is brought to you by CBD lion listen, they have fucking Rebuilt my fucking hamstring. Do you understand me between the cream between the little gummies that I have here today with me today my little orange 500 milligram in the raspberry ones. They've been there for me my Hamstring at night, this is what I rub on at night when I come out of this shower when it's done miracles So listen if you're looking for a CBD that is quality that is real go to CBD lion right now Look at the third-party lab results for yourself. This is the best stuff out there. Who told you your uncle Joey? Also, the church is brought to you by athletic greens

If you're not starting the day off with a blast of vitamins, you're already lost go back to bed and fucking stay there all day But if you want to feel tip-top Magoo, let athletic greens do the dirty work They got you covered in five critical areas. You're ready health energy immunity Gut health and hormonal support who takes care of you like that. Nobody so do me a favor The church family gets a special offer. We're gonna give you 20 free travel packs Value that's $79 with your first purchase jump over to athletic greens calm slash church CH you are CH to get your travel packs today. That's athletic greens Com slash church. The church is also brought to you by let me ask you something

How are you coming for life insurance? You're probably sitting there scratching your head low Joey? What's life insurance? What happens if you slip on a fucking banana peel and your kids still has to go to school? If you're not covered already put life insurance on the top of your to-do list Policy genius makes it quick and easy find the right life insurance at the best price So listen, don't be a schmuck if you need life insurance head to policy genius calm It only takes a few minutes to find the right policy in insurance policy apply and have another thing crossed off your list for 2020 policy genius when it comes to life insurance

It's nice to get it right and tell them the church of what's happened now sent you It's got a beautiful fucking day to be alive. Kick this fucking meal Lee. It's Thursday The 19th of December you got five more shoplifting days Make them count cock suckers. Oh Yeah, a little slow and easy for you Out of respect Little Chris Cornell You

Fucking nuts You got professor Joey Alvarado the Christ killer Nice Killing Nice best singer of all time my pin nice Professor what's happening you bad motherfucker and just do my thing 3 in the morning always man for three days a week over there. I teach 20 classes a week Yes, it's my full-time job. So like, you know, so you teach you teach

Seven kind of bell classes a week teacher. I teach six six So like I teach one a day over there and then the rest is all the rest is all jiu-jitsu So Monday Wednesday and Friday. It's 5 30. Mm-hmm Tuesday Thursdays at night. It's at 9 6 30 Saturday at 10 a.m. Yeah Yeah, and then the jiu-jitsu, you know, we have like we have a ton of people over there So I teach the rest is all jiu-jitsu classes then I have a couple private clients as well You still do the Basics I do the five do most of the fundamentals my morning jiu-jitsu classes are like all levels and Then and then at noon I do a fundamentals class while professor. Alberto teaches the advance and then

In the evening I do a couple fundamental classes as well So most of the time I do most of the fundamentals me and Josiah, you know Josiah. Oh, and your boy Marco to Marco He's teaching some of the fundamentals and our 6 30 and 7 30 8 30 is now like a fucking expert class Well, they're splitting it up now because we have we have a lot more black belts now and and We have more students. So we have to accommodate everybody man Like, you know, we have people who are advanced but can only train at like 8 30, you know, I mean So I mean, it's good so you can we split the classes up now So we just have all kinds of classes and you got to go on the schedule is just too many to talk about it is

It's crazy. I saw this graduation class a couple of weeks ago and I gotta hand it to him It was insane man. It's fucking insane insane. How many students we have there now? It's fucking dope and when it comes to Burbank, North Hollywood all disappear He's got the main lunchtime class man. You know it honestly, dude I don't know another gym in LA that is has as many students as us. I've done John does he I've never been John John I would love to train with John shot I got I got my black belt from his brother Hodger John Jax had a great lunchtime. Yeah, I'm talking about in general all together though

She's crazy because our our legacy is like popping from like five in the morning to like cooking the evening man It's crazy. It's amazing like professor. Alberto has really done it like Created kind of like a little mecca of jiu-jitsu and fitness out there now. So we have everything remember when he was When Justin Fortune was boxing I'd never met Justin Fortune, but I know a lot of people have trained that's how I that's how I really acted with Alberto in New Mexico when I was shooting the longest yard goddamn and then I connected with him That was a long time ago because he's man, New Mexico 2004 Wow, we used to all go me Ivan Salaberry Bob. Sapp Ivan Salaberry. I remember like

Bob's a Bob's out Bob's out Maury Smith We would all go to our burrows because it was close to the hotel I bet you have the people listening right now. Don't even know who Maury Smith is. Yeah, just this badass kickbox Oh, man, he was the first guy man to solve the puzzle man Like you know like he learned how to scramble back to his feet instead of like getting to a jiu-jitsu match If somebody took him down, he would just wait to stand up and then kickboxer after you already fought Mark Coleman You know, I wouldn't fight. I didn't watch fighting man. Oh, man

You didn't even know Joe Rogan back then. Yes, I knew Joe I know Joe's is 98 and they would talk to me then I met Eddie Mm-hmm Joe, and I would get in a car with them and I'm thinking about Snot and coconut my dick sucked and they're up there talking about jujitsu sweeps I'm like, what the fuck is the jujitsu sweep? I came from the 70s where you swept was this before Joey karate. This is before Joey karate and this is before Eddie Abu Dhabi This is before Eddie even dreamt of going Abu Dhabi So Joe and Eddie were training partners. Okay, and John's oxy back down and they would that you do you couldn't shut them up?

Mm-hmm. You couldn't so they're relatively back then. They're relatively new to it They were Eddie was already Eddie like he was a brown belt. Okay, and Joe was like a blue belt Joe went every day and that's all they talked about and it was fucking annoying as fuck But it was educational being around something they would and then they would talk about You know, I was raised in traditional martial arts Me too. I was raised in a time when Bruce Lee was you know, that was you know, the ghee and you ran on the streets You know and you fucking broke boards and you hit the fucking Fucking did all that little pads that they never hold and you weren't real if your knuckles weren't oh, man

Busted up. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I had calluses I had calluses because my fucking thing is called the Machiwara Machiwara you know, you know, you know, it's funny you say that is is uh, I had a pleasure of training next to Dan and Asanto You know, Dan Asanto like I did a Muay Thai camp like back in the mid 90s And he's telling us Bruce Lee's stories And one of the things he told us about Bruce Lee is that he never stopped working out And he said he had one of those Machiwara or whatever you call it in this fucking car He just be fucking hitting that motherfucker in the car or he'd be bouncing Brandon off his abs doing ab work

I was watching TV like he's like he'd never stop fucking working out, man But yeah, like uh my master used to have wooden floors so we used to do our push-ups on our knuckles So then I had fucking calluses on my first two knuckles And I mean that shit would like strike fear into people people would like look at my knuckles and be like that was it You had to have your knuckles fucked up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I grew up under that. Oh, gee shit I grew up under that tent and then I got out of karate at 16. I want a different direction Then I met Rogan like a 36 or something and they're talking about this. You have seen I put it on Looks like he hasn't stopped eating cheeseburgers 20 years against some other guy that looks like just got out of the prison

This is fucking disgusting, you know, and like I I think I watched to it remember that there weren't I was living in Denver When all those the UFC's would start only Colorado late, you get oh, yeah Yeah, yeah, but for sure back then my friends wouldn't shut up about it. Yeah, like I said, I watched one time I saw some big fat guy and like a bodysuit and I saw some guy in like prison fucking stripes And I was like, this isn't martial arts. It's a fucking joke. Yeah, and they would talk about it continually You know our relationship grew his friends Eddie went to Abu Dhabi opened up the Hammer House His first school and then he opened up Was that with Mark Coleman? No, no, no, he opened up on Santa Monica, but I don't know what it was

What are you listening to me for? Bombs or legends bomb squad bomb squad. Well, you're right. Damn. He opened up bomb squad then they moved to the Brea and Between Hollywood and Sunset next to that disgusting Thai restaurant Where I went in there one time with them and while we're eating I wasn't eating is that when he partnered up with like boss Randy Couture, you know, he bought. Yes Chris Chris, Chris Riley, he used to coach rampage. Yeah, he was a Muay Thai coach Pretty sure about this ever you talked about this Thai restaurant for nine years I was next door and I

Was minding my own business So I lived on the corner of that school. Oh, yeah, you literally used to live right down there I lived I lived in Hollywood, but I lived on between I lived between Hollywood and Sunset on Selma Uh-huh, and they were nice had nothing to do early and I would walk to the to whatever that was on the corner there The Thai restaurant. No 10th planet. Oh 10th planet next to it was the Thai restaurant And one day I go, where's that? And they're like the next door eating Thai food and I go next door. I sit down They're eating that disgust Fucking waiters with slippers on and shit dry feet

I'm fucking getting aggravated and all of a sudden in the middle of my aggravation Just a compliment what I was thinking a roach Fell from the ceiling onto the table and it landed on its back. So it was a little close And I said, I told you mother fuckers not to eat this filthy food and I got up and walked I got up and walked out and that was my hall. That was the whole and I was sitting there going That fried rice looks good with I can't do it I'm breaking my you're like real particular about that kind of I like Chinese. I'm with the Chinese. They were here first The Chinese were here first when I got here from Cuba. There was Chinese restaurants everywhere all of a sudden thai and sudami

Ethiopian food I love Thai food. They tell me I take my shoes off that ain't a restaurant. That's a stink fest You got a bunch of white people with stinky feet that have to shower all day Oh, let's take our shoes off. You take your fucking shoes I know what my feet smell like I ain't taking my shoes off because he's gonna get agita while you're eating It's like trying to eat while somebody's farting You try to eat when somebody just farted a brown one in the air like it's that light shit. So That's how long I know eddy

So when they would talk about jujitsu Then they would get to the point where they would travel in packs And we would go do comedy and after comedy they would clean out the fucking front And eddy would wrestle somebody from the staff That was like a purple belt in Arizona I don't know how many nights and Tate Tate Fletcher Tate it would be me eddy red band Ari Tate Duncan and

Joe paid for Ari and Duncan to take jujitsu So everybody was taking jujitsu except me and they'd be out in that hallway fucking fight until his death I remember the tempi improv one night. It was fucking tremendous. And then we go to san francisco little denny would show up I still I know little denny when he was too young To come to the club as he was 16 He's the one that used to run 10 planet san francisco I still remember him being a 16 year old kid and I sneak on him into the back door And me going on stage bring him rogan up and going back to the san jose green room

And they'd be wrestling Shoes would be off and man like when you first started doing jujitsu Yeah, they were ripping themselves like when I first got into jujitsu back in Man, I don't like mid 90s in south carolina. There was no jujitsu in south carolina I stopped to drive to virginia beach to train with the blue belt And then I'd go back and get one of my taekwondo buddies or hop kato buddies and show them what I knew And then we'd fucking find a piece of carpet somewhere or wherever to fucking just train wherever man because you know, there were no mats

Or I would go to a jujitsu school a judo gym or something like that where they had mats and and just roll with those cats like that, you know, so That's when you're so enthusiastic about it. You don't fucking give a fucking just train wherever you just can't can't stop thinking about especially like if you've been a traditional martial artist like us And then you know, you have black belts in these martial arts and then you're getting choked out by jujitsu people You're like, what the fuck? It's just like, you know, it's amazing. It just eliminates karate and yeah, I just like wow man So then that I remember I was just obsessed and just roll any time You could you know, but now I've been doing it for 30 years

So it's before I hurt calm down a little bit, but I still love jujitsu before I hurt myself. I hadn't rolled for about two weeks I just do privates with this guy He's a little older And I mess around with him and got to the point where you know when I went to how brothers I love that shit I just couldn't get to this couple positions my breathing but jujitsu opened up my eyes to how Bad the shape I really was like it opened up my eyes to it opened up my eyes to the fight of flight response which

We know what happened. I used to be a criminal. Yeah, so my fly the flight response Used to be top notch. That's what you live on. Yeah. Yeah, you know when I put a gun to your ribs You got fly the font Fly the fight like a mother I'm saying like yeah, yeah when I kick down the door And I'm looking and I know for a fact professor joey has a kilo in his house And I'm searching through shit, you know your flight of fire response is there you learn how to adjust to that Sure, sure you go deaf

If you're really a fucking real guy you go deaf If I know joey parks the car at seven and walks down whatever to go get the train over in north hollywood And me and leah gonna jump you by whatever Those three minutes before you get there if I do my job, right? I should be going deaf I should hear your steps coming very softly before I hit you there with this What's that adrenaline starts kicking in starts kicking in adrenaline Adrenaline's a fucking crazy thing man. You know what got me to help my fly the fight squatting squatting like what do you mean heavy weights?

I almost quit there and I go I can't I have to tackle this problem. Yeah, you got you got to squat for three minutes straight Yeah, man, you got to you got to control your breathing man, and you have to control your breathing And that's why I tell it like like when it comes to adrenaline Like like I remember my first fight my first professional fight. It was in tj And and uh They had us all in one room and we're all like what the fuck my opponent's over there We're like, what's going on here, man?

And then I had this my friend Juan his girlfriend was like, how do you feel? How do you feel? Are you gonna win? Are you gonna do this? And I was just feeling waves of adrenaline And it was like I felt like I was just gonna like fucking flip out man And then my instinct kicked in and I started controlling my breathing Like controlling because if you don't control your heart rate, then Then your adrenaline will work against you, you know, I mean That's why a lot of people like gas out when they go when they fight in the UFC because they they let the adrenaline get to them They blow their wad, you know, you've seen that a hundred times in UFC

So like I remember I had to control my breathing. So it's all about your breathing, man If you can control your breathing, then you can use your adrenaline to your advantage You know what I mean? And then your instincts just kick in it. It's so funny. Like I got you. Jitsu. I couldn't breathe Yeah, I get my nose fixed. Yeah, you got your nose fixed got my nose fixed I mean not for vanity reasons not like I look yeah, because you couldn't breathe right when they go in there clean Take everything out that old cocaine rock And like one night It was crystallizing your nostrils

The wall of cocaine in my nose. I couldn't fucking breathe And then I got a dr. Belisa came on here And she has a book called breathe and that really helped me now. She recently sent me breathing for athletes I just Have not had a chance to crack a fucking book in six weeks I'm supposed to write a review for her and I don't want to write a fake review I want to read the book and get some out of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah But I had to read like, you know her thing is you breathe naturally

Okay, it was funny my daughter came in here the other day and she's punched that thing for three minutes straight And when she finished dice goes Look at her. She's not even breathing at me. My daughter goes to movie tie and he don't stop for 45 minutes You know, they have had gear Her breathing is the way you should breathe Something happens when you're 14 or 15 Like a traumatic experience and you're breathing Determinates and this is what it says in our book breathe

And this is why boss rootin invented that breathing machine So I connected him and her and boss together because they had something that breathing piece when I'm typing I put it in my mouth, you know And it helps with my Asthma You just put it in and breathe as I'm typing yeah for an hour I'll fucking breathe with that thing and I'll do different exercises people who do actually fucking do Yeah, it really helps you because it

It closes the hole so you learn how to take more air and your lungs learn how to take more Because people roll man, and you know, I have to remind people all the time I was like this man, you gotta breathe. That's where you're gassing out I could see you're holding your breath even like when I'm training with people with the kettlebells, you know You got to make sure everybody's breathing So there's different ways to like I mean, I've known about breathing since like my math my my taekwondo man How kato master taught us how to breathe, you know, you got to breathe in through nose out slow your heart rate down All that shit, you know, so it's important has to be circle

Your mouth they want your mouth I practice a very simple breathing technique You just breathe in through your nose out through your mouth slowly Really slow and then like you could do it different ways you can breathe in like for five seconds Breathe out for five seconds and then you can start increasing it The way you slow your heart rate down is by through your breathing It's very simple and people have different techniques and stuff like that But it's I've been doing that for forever, man. It works for me, you know first month. I did jiu-jitsu

I would have to run outside and take my Yeah, man, because it's it's it's yeah. Yeah, absolutely. You know, because you get claustrophobic with a gi on Marco lose anxiety Marco the purple bum. Uh-huh his anxiety is so bad when he gets on a plane he passes out He would tell you that no, no, and that's to the point where I pass out So it was something that was passed on from me and my mother to me And now my daughter has it. Oh, wow when she hurts herself and you pick her up She loses consciousness. You gotta shake her. Oh, wow. She just fell a couple weeks ago at the park off the zipline And fucking she hurt her back. I hit her pretty hard

And I had to pick her up and hold her and I told her just breathe out of your nose And I stole the other day how to talk to her about anxiety. I'm trying to talk to her because she's having a problem Yeah, it's something like I didn't know what it was. There was no anxiety when I was 12 No, exactly. Yeah, people they'll people have anxiety for you. There was no you didn't know what it was It's just a feeling that but I get the man. I can I live in anxiety What do you think happens to me five minutes before I go on stage? Oh, yeah, that's normal though, man Because you're about to perform. It's not normal. It's not normal what I get. You're supposed to have butterflies butterflies. Yeah And that's not a little bit of fear

Not the shit I get I get the shit. That's telling me to quit Like getting the car right now. Oh, yeah, you did enough. Yeah, you know, man I I as many jujitsu matches and professional memory fights I have even like if I'm going to compete in a jujitsu tournament On the way there. I'm like, what the fuck am I doing? I'm like, what do I do? Oh, really? You start quite. Yeah, I start talking to myself. I'm like, I'm like, listen, man I'm like, Joey, what are you thinking? You've had a hundred jujitsu matches. You know, jujitsu. What are you worried about? I'm like, I keep have to keep telling myself But it did get really bad towards the end of my MMA career though because I was getting my ass kicked, you know

And after a while, I was it was just the anxiety was getting to me to the point where I fucking look like shit in the cage and I just wouldn't fight and I was just like, okay I'm done. I had three three losses in a row But the anxiety with MMA got to the point where it was having a really negative effect on my fighting, you know I wasn't like believing in myself, but jujitsu Is it's a little bit different? I know I'm not going to get punched in a fucking face and shit like that I'm gonna play with the secret as professor. Tell me the secret It's got to do a lot with breathing

Absolutely, but the secret is mindset. Absolutely, man. You know, like the secret is how you look at things You know what, you know when I have a best set of my life Two things when I don't give a fuck I'm when I'm having a good time I love to come up with a joke on stage that insults you that much But I laugh Once I do that I'm not gonna lose. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah for sure. You know the first two times I drove to alberto's I parked

And I said one of my crazy I pulled the way it took a lot for me to walk into Yeah, I could imagine when I walked into alberto's the fear was gone for the first three months It was like I can't believe I'm gonna do this But I had to turn my mindset around. I had to look at it as I was going to A have fun Exactly like people but yeah when I'm on top of you when I fart my mistake How much do we laugh and I'm like now I got you professor. Get off me. You smell it. Yeah, you laugh Because you know like what happens is is you build it up too much. You build it up. That's what's happening

I mean, you're like, what am I doing? I'm just fucking going here to learn and how oh my god I was always putting my gi on I'm thinking I'm gonna get a hug. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah people do all the time trust me I see I saw like one girl one time And you know the gym's packed and she's just she's like this and the gym holding her purse And I had to come up to her. I was like, hey, you okay? She's like, I'm like, hey, it's okay We're gonna take care of you man. I like we're just gonna train You know, you know like they get scared because it's intimidating You're going into school with a bunch of fucking guys choking motherfuckers and shit like I get it, you know, but

But it's really up to the people at that gym to make you feel welcome You know how many times I've had a fucking show at seven o'clock The car's gonna pick me up at a quarter to seven. I'm in a strange town I don't pick a town. I'm in fucking Dallas I have been on stage twice at the comedy store I wrote all week To prepare my mind the day of the show I actually sat down and wrote something opposite jokes

To get creativity and then an hour before the show I look at my material I make some lasting things then I smoke a joint I go in the shower And I sit for 30 minutes And that's where I get the you know, like you start going home. Maybe I'll add that here Oh, shit. I put this here. I bang one out. You fucking dry off. You get ready for the show Right then and that is where the fear starts from So on the car ride to the gig Once I get to the theater, it's all pure fear. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I walk into the green room like bro when I walk into the green room

Rather, I got to walk a hundred steps A hundred yards or two yards and you got to hear my breathing when I walk into a theater It feels like I'm about to have a heart attack. Yeah, so that's when you need to really start controlling your breathing And right there is when I go you got to regulate it. Yeah, I start breathing I sit I drink water And that's when I have to start doing what I you know when I write that shit during the day on facebook That's how I actually think. Yeah, because if I let me think I would think I'm a pussy I would say to myself if my post would be why get up

Stay in bed. It's hard out there. Nothing's gonna happen. No, you got to think the opposite Grab a knife wash your balls. Somebody's gonna suck it. If somebody's out there's thirsty to that Somebody's out there dying to suck a dick and you got tap on the menu. You know what I'm saying But you're right about the the mindset is everything one of things like uh I like like what happened to me with the um the mma is you know, I'd come out and I see a big crowd of fucking people And I was just like oh shit and I'll start fucking shit in my pants You know, that's what started happening more towards the end of the career And then I saw like like uh connor mcgregor was commentating they were showing like uh like a montage of his fights

And he was explaining what was going on And then he was like you see right here. He was coming out and everybody's booing him He's like you see that shit. They're all fucking boomy. He goes. I fucking love that because it's passion And he goes I use that I turned that into positive energy and I was like, yes, man that's what you got to fucking do man because you know That's what you're there to fight man and he he turned a negative into a positive and that's and I honestly think that's one of his Strongest traits is his mindset his mindset. I mean the guy's a fucking billionaire now. Look what he fucking is done You know, I mean, so that's something I really admire about people who fight in the ufc and are successful man

You know how strong people don't look at What you have to go through mentally to fight that you're about to fight in fucking millions of people man it takes it takes balls and um It takes a lot of mental preparation and that's where your coach comes in your coach If you have a good coach, they should be preparing your mentally me back then there were no mma schools So we're like self-trained and I had my my students would be cornering me, you know, and they'd be just as scared as me They'd be like, oh shit, you know, but the mindset is it's it's it's key. It's so funny how there's people who are good There's people who you ever hear those guys that come into ufc

And it's like their first fight in the ufc and people like we've been hearing about these guys at the gym He said hey, uh america's top team just goes to everybody. There's people who are gym fighters Yeah, yeah, absolutely tremendous gym. That was me. I was gonna go into the fucking arena They see two thousand people And they shit. Yeah, man. Let me give let me flip it. Let me flip the heart on you. Yeah I'm tremendous in the economy storage Tremendous I could go and then go nine out of ten Ten times in a row because I know the nooks and crannies of it. I'm just like you're home. I'm great in the theater

I'm great at a comedy club Tell me the issue is special I fall apart at the seams I can't even think about it. Yeah, but if I don't have to shoot, you know Comics a lot of young comics listening to this right now You know how hard it is to get a tape Like this whole career this whole business is based on a tape. Sure. Sure. Sure. You can't get to the next level without a tape There's people who are just very smart comics. Yeah, I wasn't smart There's comics who just buy a camera and a tripod

and just film every set and They just keep filming. They don't care if it's three people. Yeah, yeah, many people. Sure. That's what they do They watch the set. It's training. They watch what they did wrong, but they're also hoping And through time you just get used to taping. That was my mistake. I never taped as a young Yeah, it's just like I hated who wants to look at me. Yeah. Yeah. You want to look at me if you're me I don't look at me. I don't ever want to see me up. Yeah, you got to get better That's how you get better. That's how you get better for sure and that there's people that are young comics today I guarantee out of all those people who have really good specials

Like I can see like an Anthony Jesenek being a guy that taped all his sets coming up And got so comfortable That it's just second nature. I can't do well for specials. I don't want to issue a special again But come see me live. I'll rock your fucking world and in my world. That's what really matters What you need is somebody somebody like film a set without you knowing That's but who's filming without you knowing like, I don't know man. That's the problem Maybe maybe I'll pay somebody off. No, who's filming without you knowing you can't take a camera out of the county club no more You gotta get permission to put a camera in there

If we can't if a door guy sees you going like this, they're gonna come to you and ask you to leave So you always have to be prepared. That was my knock. Yeah, I'm not good at specials And that look at I'll tell you who that happened to I'm not putting them down I don't want you to people to hit him up on twitter and said I'm tell you was a shitty fighter I heard he was the best jujitsu guy at What's uh, the new york school's not my cell hands those school david branch I heard david branch was beating people throwing them through windows I'm bar I'm barring people with one arm fucking fighting people with

With blindfolds. He can't catch a break. He got beat up in the ufc. Yeah, he just got beat up last week One fighting champions. Yeah, man. There's people who fall between the holes. Sure. I've always said man I honestly feel like I was like that kind of fighter because I would go spar at gyms And fuck people up light them up and people would just automatically assume like that I would just kill everybody and then I would fucking like win one lose one win one lose one and and it was just like It was like hot and cold man. It was like you remember frank trig Yeah, remember he used to commentate in the pride. I liked him because he was real blunt And like when he would say something about a fighter in a cage, he'd be like man, this guy

50% of the time it looks like he should be fighting the biggest MMA show in the world And the other 50% of the time he should be eating popcorn in the stands with the other motherfuckers You know what I mean? And that's that's what we're talking about and that's kind of how I was like when I would win And when I wouldn't think about it and I would get in that zone. I would zip through people like that Like I would feel like like I should be fighting ufc and then another night. I would just like fall apart in there I'm talking to myself in the cage while I'm fucking clinched with the motherfucker and stuff like that. You know what I mean? So you wouldn't be consistent. I was not consistent. I was not a consistent, right? That's a fucking nightmare It was and you know, like I said, I had three three professional losses in a row and then I was like, that's it

I'm done because what happens is when you win Man, you it's such an amazing feeling like fucking winning over a fight And it's somebody in the cage and then people are coming up to you. You're that fucking man They want your autograph like when I want to build Mexico And then you keep searching for that feeling again, man That's why people stay they retire. They don't retire soon enough You know what I mean? They keep fighting and keep fighting because they because the feeling of winning is just fucking It's amazing. You know what I mean? It's crazy when you see a fighter. I was smart enough to give it up

It's crazy when you see a fighter or any professional athlete That's done. They don't know that. Yeah. Yeah, they don't want it. They don't want to accept it They don't want to accept it, but they're done and you feel bad for them I love when people say, well, I wish this guy for this guy from the ufc Yeah, and you're like somebody like bj pen, man, you know, like you should have been retired a long time ago, man I hate seeing I'm like, why is he still fighting? You don't want to see that You don't want it's horrible. It's horrible. He lost seven in a row. Why is he still fighting?

You don't want to see there's no need for a time where you just switch off in this Yeah, because you can't you can't have that fucking eye of the tiger forever, man You just can't have it. How do you It's like it's kind of I kind of understand it because if if you have that mindset to be able to do it Like you can still have the mindset when your body's not there. So it's kind of hard to turn that mindset off I would assume. Yeah, I mean you will yeah Well mindset is also built from confidence Sure mindset for a stand-up show

or a Wrestling match or ufc fight is a different mindset than say how you look at things when you're going into you know Going to a gym for some people. It's really tough. Sure going for a gym. It's tough for me sometimes but I go in there looking at it like it like i'm gonna eat pussy Yeah, you're gonna eat some pussy Look at the gym. Whatever you have to do to turn it into a positive a positive like kind of that's that's you know

You know, you know, I could never like you know, like uh people consider me a funny guy at legacy You know, because I'm I'm always trying I I just like having a good time, man But I could never see myself there. You should do comedy, man I was like I like being up on stage like you do man. I would shit my pants What scares you about it like if people aren't laughing I get boot off the stage, you know, which is kind of silly I've had I've gotten my ass kicked in front of thousands of people but checks us out. So I had like, uh my first musical performance, you know and and uh, I have a singing instructor istani

And I had like maybe five lessons with her and I hadn't been able to Our our times were matching up. So I hadn't had anything So I hadn't been able to uh have any lessons with her So I hadn't seen her in a couple months and I was about to take a nap and she texted me She was like, hey, I want you to perform in this performance at gangist Cohen My adrenaline went up. I was like, oh shit. I gotta fucking I got I was like, I have to do this Because it's something that I've always wanted to do, you know

So I just fucking man. I played those songs, but I did two original songs I did them. I practiced them so much that it was like second nature to me And then uh, what happened was like you like you were saying was like At gangist Cohen Alberto was there with his wife and there was like 10 people there from legacy and man It just loosened me up so well. Yeah, I did not even fucking get nervous, dude But then I also had like a backing band, you know, I mean, so I had something to fall back on Like with comedy is like there's nobody back there like seeing back up for you or anything like that

So it's fucking like it's fucking crazy, man, you know I don't want to end up like fucking Kramer from fucking Seinfeld remember he fucking got heckled and then fucking lost it up there Well, he said they went up there and said a bunch of fucking ratio. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, because the guy was heckling So I wonder where that motherfucker is today It doesn't matter because I was looking on google one time and they always have like the the top Those guys are still making fucking names of dollars from Seinfeld. They're making re's at home counting his money Yeah, but what good is if he's home with the windows with the with the shades drawn? That's true, man If you can't spend your money every time every three black guys these he's goes

Aren't you the motherfucker that said niggas on stage in the lab factory? You know, so it's got to be tough for somebody like that. Yeah, yeah for sure I mean, I I respect like Louis E. K. I respect those guys, but then again I know what it's like to come out of prison And the words out that you've been in prison and people see you know, like And you have to tell like, well, you've been how was it in there? Oh, it was fucking disneyland It was disney on ice. I don't fucking think it was in there. We did all that shit in life But it's so weird how the mindset of things

you know Even when I write comedy I used to sit down and go. I don't know why I'm doing this because nothing good is going to come out of this Now I look now I look to write because I know the longer I sit down. I'm going to get one line I just wouldn't eat one line cemented in my head And they'll stay in there forever one night or come out and I'll fucking die a laugh then There you have it. Yeah, but the mindset especially, you know when

the mindset of That I had between 94 and like till 2012 Was completely different than the mindset I have towards comedy now Like it's a business for me now. Sure. I have to be good I have to eliminate this. There was a time when I went on stage and I was 50 50 I was a 50 50 percentage guy

Especially if I improvised Especially if I went out then go, hey, how you guys doing? That's tough. What's your name buddy? What do you do for a living? All right, little kettlebells. Really? What do you swing them? You hit people in the head with them? That shit's terrible. That's a horrible fucking way to do comedy. Sure. Not preparation. Yeah, man Eliminates a lot of that fear preparation. Do you like do your jokes for people and stuff like that? No, no I mean, no like what that's what I did for the performance man is like I like I would Invite people in my pad. I play songs for them and stuff like that. No, I tell you go fuck yourself. Yeah But you know what you need to do you got to be like Conor McGregor and you got to you got to turn

Turn it into a positive You got it. You got to think like this. Listen Why am I at this comedy club? Because people are here and they want to see you and they fucking love you and they think you're fucking funny It's fuck. You know what I mean? Just go out there and do your thing. You know how to do your thing You know what I mean? That's how you got to like think of it. I don't I don't look at it like that I look at it as you got it. You should Joey people love you. I've been doing this for 20 years. Yeah I've done the half time of the buffalo save a hockey game

And that's the confidence I get that I've done this at the house. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah for sure Forget about people. Listen, you love your mother But if she slips up with the fucking recipe, you're gonna go mom. What the fuck with this? You know what I'm saying? We all love our mother. Oh, you can't you can't be on mom. What the fuck You can't be on 100 miles. Where's the fucking laundry? You didn't wash my shirt. I told you I had a date tonight I didn't feel good. I still got skid marks in my drawers. Yeah Listen people love you, but you also have to deliver the goods. Sure. So I'm never rested laurels on that Yeah, yeah, they like me listen to the podcast. They paid for a babysitter

They paid for a ticket. They paid for a fucking ticket service charge They did a thousand things for them to be here I have to do a thousand things to be my best for them Where it's coming my head. The only thing I don't do is wear a suit Because I can't sell my material with a suit. Yeah, it's just not you It's not me. It's not you. I fucking I would love to wear a suit on stage Give somebody You know in the 70s you wore a suit to make people yeah, man

You know what you should do you do one of those like suits like eddie murphy did in raw that red leather suit The Elvis suit Remember in half a how and so do they got when they got in where a suit he came to a meeting in shorts Those are the people I grew up with You know what I'm saying? From the the Irish man You show up with shorts. What the fuck that was funny. You show up late and with fucking shorts. It's like how you go to That was like disrespectful. That was hilarious. That was a good. You always had a suit on the 70s

You always wore a suit in the 70s when you flew that you were required to wear a suit in the 70s Yeah, look at the planes in the 70s when people flew everybody was dressed for the nines Only now these two people with flip flops of dirt on their heel Putting shoes up on your fucking thing. We've changed guys. That's right But flying has become a nightmare. Also Flying should be an experience. You know when you go on vacation on vacation Doesn't matter whether you're going to mexico mars jupiter. You're going on vacation. You're going to the plane You're gonna eat at the airport. You're gonna see a bunch of people. What do you do?

You get to an airport and they put you on a communist line For two hours that you don't know All of a sudden you thought oh, we got to throw your shampoo away. What the fuck I'm flying with no shampoo. They threw away my fucking ear things. Yeah, you know, oh, what's these pills? Oh, those are my pills them. I say when you're domestic Do they make you take your shoes off and all that shit too? Oh, yeah domestic flights? I can't remember and I got clear and they still if you unless you got tsa Then you don't have to take their shoes off

But like I'll fly with a warm-up suit. You need that like what is it called that global entry shit? Yeah, that global entry where you bypass all those customs and all that shit and you can just go right through It's called global entry It's pretty dope. Yeah, that's great. But I got 19 felonies Like you don't qualify I get tsa pre out of la They always give it to me because I fly 20 times a year. They know I'm not a fucking terrorist It's the other plant. It's the other airports

The computer systems don't give me tsa pre Plus I have the clear so I cut right through you anyway. Nice saying I know how to fly so I know not to wear jeans You know, you don't wear jeans to fly. No, I like to be comfortable You have to wear warm-ups or you have to put you take your belt off You know, you got to wear sneakers in case you got to run through an airport, you know, you got to wear flip-flops Wear flip-flops. What if you got to run through an airport? There's an active shooter You also have to have like Easy access because in case you get you case you become a member of the mile high club

always You know, you got access. I don't drink alcohol on a flight. I don't try to retain sodium Last time I did that man. I got no diet. So no nothing. Yeah, I don't do nothing in the plane I did that once man before I got it. It's so weird how bad I feel Even before I When I take care of myself and I fly like long distances. I feel it for a couple days I could imagine people who don't take care of themselves when they fly how they feel. I just ordered like, uh One of those tight pants the chick wear yoga pants those are spats. I'm gonna start wearing spats under the sweats

I feel a lot of people wear those. I couldn't believe I don't like the boy was I had a word I had a word for my leg for the hamstring. Yeah. Yeah, I can see that the blood clots. I put them on both legs I was like a lot of people put them under their deep pants Imagine what your first look at the smile like Stuck in those pants You got like open it up the fucking with the aroma out. Nice and stuck in there You know, but no, it's uh the mindset is really Big with everything, you know, man when you get into jiu-jitsu

When you walk in that door the first three classes You realize you're completely lost people mountain you people passing your guard You know, if you took a look at the percentages people probably quit after four classes Because they don't think they're gonna achieve that. There's people that go fuck. It's hard Let me put my head down Somebody smart like you goes up to missus. Come here. You see what's happening today? It's gonna happen for the next 11 months Enjoy it and if you keep coming here three times a week

You'll be doing what they're doing. Oh man. I tell people that all some people will put their head down and do exactly that Fight through whatever you know commit to it three times a week I have to explain to them that three times everybody goes through the same process Everybody goes through the same process tell people like when you start jiu-jitsu you have to master Tap jitsu first to learn how to tap tap with your foot say tap tap with your hands whatever, you know Because you don't know anything it's like learning a language, you know, like I'm gonna give you a couple moves It's like giving you a couple words and then later on you're gonna learn how to put it into a sentence and connect the connect the dots And all that stuff like that. That's jiu-jitsu it takes it takes time just like anything else

People ask me how do I get better at jiu-jitsu? I was like you got to do it more Just like anything you want to get good at something you got to do it all the time If you're doing jiu-jitsu for like once a week, you're not going to retain anything twice a week Three times a week a little bit better, but you know what I mean? You got to just keep doing it man So like yeah, I go through that every day. I have to encourage people. I even had a blue belt once man He was on the couch. I could tell he was like real sad like almost in tears Blue belt and he's an older guy man great guy But man, you know, he's getting smashed by all these young cats and stuff like that and he was like hot professor, man

I'm I think I'm just gonna fucking quit and I'm just gonna quit I get my ass kicked every day and every day and this and that I was like listen, man I had to sit down and talk to him, you know Because you know, you people get the blue belt blues, man Because that's the cutoff point blue belt people get their blue belt They either drop off if you make it to purple belt statistics say that you're gonna eventually go to your black belt So yeah, so I'm at just exactly like I see it all the time I have to like encourage people because people get discouraged, you know

He's gonna sneak in a freaking apart I got a nice garlic one for you. I took three tablets this morning. Wait till you get a whiff of this You take garlic tabs. Yeah And I took three because I wanted to be special for them and I had a salad too Which pushes everything out Mmm, take a whiff of that. How much would it cost to have you sit here and just choke him out every time he does this? Oh my god, he loves that stuff. He's a real man. He doesn't mind He doesn't mind the good fart from time to time

What are those called with the sleep apnea mask when Asian people wear, you know, like when they're sick I got I got I'm trying to build a contraption. I'm trying to take my sleep apnea machine And figure out how to put it on people and fart You know, oh my god, that's the system to use. Oh my god. I would sleep apnea machine You don't even know it's coming. You just breathe him because there's nothing better than farting And somebody walks into your fart and catches a huge breath of it No, there's like, you know, many times I caught a manager one night at the comedy club I had just farted and he came in with his mouth open. Oh my god

And I remember him like looking at me like a dick one in his mouth And I go dog if I was you I wouldn't stand there. I go you already know you smell you fucking lived that far You just walked into it. He just walked into it and took a deep breath and it was all over How uh You know, it's so weird 2020's coming. I know that's crazy. This is why I wanted to get you on to just Talk to people, you know, I tell people all the time If you're thinking of doing resolutions and you wait until january 1st, you lost already. Yeah start right now Yeah, yeah people like to start now. I'm gonna start not because december get december means 10 pounds

People have no idea that once you do that once you hit december It's 10 pounds no matter what I don't know what it is man around this time of year Sweets they're everywhere fucking sweets, you know what I had yesterday. I went all this shit You know, yesterday I had a rough day. I put my cat away. Yeah. Yeah, well fucking he is I had to put him down and this is the one I made the promise to the quick cocaine I made a thousand promises to a thousand people And the one I kept was to a cat that didn't even know he made a problem I just got on my hands and knees and said god if you save this cat, I'll never snore coke again

I had to put him down yesterday And when my wife got back I thought I didn't feel too good When she left I thought I thought I was having a stroke Because I got up and I laid on the floor with him until they took him And I hadn't eaten and I got up just to make a protein shake And I made a wrong protein shake like I put mayonnaise in it Oh, shit, like I did shit. I don't even know what I put in it. I put the wrong I don't even put milk in protein. I make a protein shake with water

And I put milk and ice cream in it. What am I doing? That's how this shoveled. I was I had to start the scratch But when she got back she goes, what do you want to do when I go listen? I know that you're too upset to cook We've got a couple pieces of sushi And when we walked out she goes are you happy and I go I feel a little better And she goes what would make you happy and I go honest to god Something that happened to had since I started jujitsu or anything She goes what's that go a piece of apple pie Just because I'm petrified of diabetes petrified professor

So I said let's go get we went over to 420 and we split a dutch apple pie with ice cream, you know That was the extent of it, but yeah Usually I watch myself a lot in december. Yeah, because those cookies add up. Yeah, man. I I don't typically eat those candy I could eat a box of candy canes if you let me You're watching the news, you know one candy cane, you know, and you know what's going on now to is is Parents are bringing like a freshly baked cookies and they're putting them on the table right there And I can't fucking just look at them. No, you gotta watch yourself this time of the year Really really and I typically don't eat sweets

I don't keep any sweets in my pad because I'll fucking get I'll get stoner munchies and I'll fucking Fits a box of cookies or I'll eat the whole box So I don't even keep anything in my pad that I I have to cook everything, you know I make I make sure I have to cook it otherwise I'll get like the munchies and eat all this shit But it's funny because yesterday it's sick my points for the day Of 41. That's what I'm allowed in yesterday. It's 60 Thank god you have like extra points to get into but I

know I ate 60 because The pie put me over the pie and the ice cream. Yeah, you have to show off man. It's like pure sugar. But it was uh, you know You got to watch yourself this time of the year. Do you get a lot of new students now on the first? Um, like usually in the new year, you know, that's that's whenever like you said everybody has the revolutions resolutions and everything And then people pile in you know, but I mean like jeez man We already have so many students there But we have people come in there all the time but around the new year

That's you know, we we usually do a special And absolutely we get people who haven't been there in a while come back and then you get new people that come back come in You know with resolutions and stuff like that But I agree with you man is like, you know what don't like don't use that as a crutch You know, if you want to get in shape just fucking start now get in shape and just do it man, you know Don't wait. Oh, I'm just gonna do it to the new year man So I try to never stop like working out, you know I'm always doing I really like and respect what you do

You post your videos every day Win places show, you know, yeah, you're showing people the flow as you're doing you explain the flow of the week Yeah, yeah, exactly. You know, I mean you have a really really good system over there. Appreciate it, man I know like I can't be fucking swinging no kettlebells for an hour though Yeah, well, we don't swing the kettlebell for an hour man. We always warm up with we always do mobility What's your class consistent if I get that 530 if you get there at 530 at 530 you're gonna come in We're gonna do mobility which is which is like neck rotations shoulder rotations elbow rotations hip rotations You know get the get the blood flowing in the joints and stuff like that

It's something that I did I never used to do before but like as like in my late 30s I started getting injuries Now it's just like man. I'm not warming up enough and so especially like as we get older We got to get blood flowing into those joints and stuff like that, you know, so we do that It's a really for the first like uh, like 20 25 minutes of the class. It's all very low impact like isometric stuff like Planks and stuff like that then we get into some body weight training

And um, it gets a little bit more intense a little bit more intense and then the like last 30 minutes of the class Is when we start getting into the kettlebell a little by little so like whenever you see the video that I post That's like very they're already warmed up. We've already built up. Okay. We've already built up to that I'm like if I gotta walk in there 530 then he's gonna hit me with a figure eight. I'm gonna have a heart attack That's a heart. I would you I would be hurting everybody and I wouldn't have any of that in my class man so like it's like when people come to the gym man, it's It's my priority to keep them safe if I'm hurting people in my kettlebell class Nobody's gonna come. I won't have a fucking job. I've been fucking teaching kettlebell classes for 10 years, man

you know and and uh That's really what separates me from all these instagram kettlebell flow people, you know because if you look at them They're not training anybody When do you ever see me post a video of me just working out by myself? You know is they're working out by themselves because they're not training with anybody. That's why I don't like working out by myself I like working out with my students. It's more fun. You know, I practice what I preach, but It's very very sad. You're not there with a whistle. I watch no no no I watch I don't use a dry erase board or anything all my workouts are in my head

I know my work my my own program, you know, like the back of my hand but um Yeah, like safety is key. I never force somebody to use too much weight That they're they're not comfortable with I'm like, hey, how is that weight? Is it too heavy? We can go lighter If it's too light, we you know what I mean to me in the beginning It's more about technique and then it's really about what you want to do You know, like if you want to progress and gradually you have to start increasing the weight If you want to get a little bit stronger you have to increase right a little bit

But even then I don't go super heavy man. I'm like, I'm not really into Doing like max reps and stuff like that It's because when you start going heavier and you start doing max reps Then you're pushing yourself to do more weight than your body is accustomed to And then that's when people start getting injured because you start losing form and stuff like that And another reason people get injured too is because they don't warm up enough So if you're really warm and you don't go too heavy, then chances are you're not going to get hurt Now the primary focus for kettlebell

Is strength or cardio or both? It's supposedly like In my classes do everything Superior tool for both Yeah, I get like in my class you're gonna get you're gonna get strong and you're gonna you're gonna burn a ton of calories as well you know, uh So you're gonna get strong because Always practice in every class. You got to think about the movements that we do in everyday life What do we do? We squat down and pick up stuff. So we squat we do lunging we hinge

We push we pull and we do some rotational stuff So if you're working those movements like with resistance and stuff in body weight, then you're going to build functional strength If you combine those movements and do like uh compound movements that involve multiple Uh motions like squatting and pressing like safer. So you get a kettlebell. You squat and you press that's called It's called a thruster. You're working your whole body together. So you're developing strength that way as well You're also developing muscle endurance and stuff like that. So there's different ways to get strong now the thrusters That's when you squat squat on the way up throw it up So like say for instance crossfit people they do thrusters with the barbell

That means a squat and then at the top door press and you squat and you press so you're just working air Those are it's a fantastic exercise With kettlebell you have like a bunch of different variations because you could do it with one kettlebell You could do a one kettlebell racked in one hand You could do with two kettlebells you can add a twist to the punch at at the top of the thruster So that's why I like kettlebells because it allows for a lot more natural movement And um and I don't go I don't go super heavy man. I don't really believe in in in uh You know, I think a lot of people lift really heavy because it makes them feel confident

You know, it makes them feel that they're strong and stuff like that, but I'm a fucking fighter, man You know, we get 220 pound guys come in and I can roll them up because I know jiu-jitsu So like how much weight you lift? I really don't it doesn't It's it doesn't matter to me. You know what I mean? Because I know like later on in life Like when you get our age and stuff like you're not gonna be fucking Trying to fucking deadlift fucking 500 pounds and shit like that

You know, you got to think about sustainability and stuff like that. So like when it comes to kettlebell work, man I think maybe my main bill that I use most of the time is like a 16 kilogram kettlebell Which is 32 35 like 32. Yeah, something like that Let's not go over 35. Yeah for swinging. I'll probably do like uh Maybe like 24 kilograms and stuff like I don't go super heavy, man I don't feel like I need to it. It's just for me. It's just supplemental training to to to um Add to my regular jiu-jitsu training and stuff like that. It's just a supplement to keep your muscles dry that Most of the training is based on avalon. What's his name? Oh, no, no, no, no the russian. What's his paddle?

Pavel I don't even think he's russian, but um He like see a lot of people think he invented kettlebell training That's just been in fucking russia forever, man, you know, and and you know what's funny about kettlebell training is nobody There's not a clear history of kettlebell training, but pavel gets credit because he's really the person who Brought kettlebells to america and popularized it, you know But he has a whole different philosophy man like his thing is like like uh, my original kettlebell coach was certified from pavel

But they have this whole thing where you are a guy You must swing with 40 kilos and my instructor would be like dude, you're an MMA fighter You should be swinging with this much of weight. I was like dude my back is fucking hurting after class I'm like why like and I realize we wouldn't warm up, but that's how he teaches if you see his video Like he has this one video is like if you are not tough, we make you tough You got to see the video. It's like it's almost like a joke man, you know like Personally, I have never been a really big fan of that guy You know

But he has his own philosophy. He was just on Joe Rogan's show, you know Pavel you got you got to check it out for yourself he wouldn't tell Joe Rogan asked him how old he was. Did you see that? No, no, no Like right there you can see Joe got turned off because he was like, hey, so how old are you and he goes? I'm 20 and he's like oh He goes no, but really how old are you and then he wouldn't tell Joe Rogan his age and Joe goes Hey, I'm 52. Are you older than me or younger man? He was he was giving Joe the run around. He wouldn't fucking do it

So Joe Joe Rogan was like some of this guy, you know, and then you know, what's funny is um Somebody a student explains something to me. He was like man, you should be As famous as these guys and this guy's he's like, but what happens is these guys They know how to hack something and they figure out how to get Like marketing and stuff like that. They find the marketing niche right there and then boom they blow up But I study people man I see if somebody says they're this and then that I research them and to be honest with you

I've never seen that guy Actually work out with the kettlebell. I've seen him demonstrating kettlebell exercise and stuff But I've never seen him do a an actual workout like an hour-long workout Now if you look up somebody like Steve Cotter or Steve Maxwell who are my early influences of kettlebell training Those guys were always working out with fucking kettlebells. They're always training people. That's why I like those guys like, okay These guys are legit. They actually train people. I love I love Steve max. I love like like those Steve max Well, Steve Cotter Those are two like and if you train in kettlebells, you should research

The og cats like that those guys were doing it before us those guys were originally rkc people But they you know philosophies differ so they broke off and did their own thing But those the guys know their shit and so like uh For instance, whenever I first started learning kettlebells from one of those rkc guys They talk about the snatch like it's the best kettlebell exercise in the world Oh, if you can snatch A hundred times your jiu-jitsu is just going to go through the roof But I would do the snatch. I was like, come on man. It's a core-based movement

It's not going to make your jiu-jitsu better, you know, and I don't think I don't feel like it's a street a true test of strength But back to pravo last night on Joe Rogan's show He was asking us. Oh, so what kind of workouts do you do? You know what he told Joe Rogan? He said I do swings and dips only That's all he does and Joe Rogan is you don't do anything else He's like no because I think I feel those exercises cover everything Swings so a swing if you saw swing a swing is a hinging movement

So you're primarily working your your butt your hamstrings your abs you lower back And you know you get a little bit of a full body workout But man, it's not the be all and and all there are so many other movements that you should really focus on You know not just swings and dips and the dips. What are you working? You're working your lower chest You're working your triceps you're working your shoulders, you know your core a little bit But but I I'm like I'm glad he said that because He teaches everybody all this kettlebell stuff and barbell stuff yet. He doesn't even do it himself You know what I mean?

That's why I'm like, I'm glad he said that because there you go right there He's because back in the day I even remember back in the day in martial art magazine They would advertise he would advertise in the magazines The the kettlebell is the 8k 47 of the russian spets does Make you strong like russian spets. No, you know like stuff like that I was just like give me your fucking break man And then then he goes on drill and last night and talks about how he only does two things So he doesn't do all the snatching and stuff like that, you know what I mean?

So that to me it's it's not authentic. You know what I mean? When I get off a plane now on a sunday I do three sets of swings three sets of cleans and Turkish get-ups No, the Turkish get-up. That's a whole other thing. You could probably do a half a Turkish get-up

Do a knee if you know how to do them five on each side three times That's a great exercise. And that's it. And by the way, like I feel completely better So you funny bringing the Turkish get-up though man is like a I have to I had to stop calling it the Turkish get-up because at legacy We have like a ton of Armenian people And it just was not fucking jiving with the man. They're like fuck that. I'm not gonna fucking do that shit I'm gonna do a fucking Armenian get-up and I get it man. You know what I mean get I'm like fuck So I'm like real self-conscious about saying that now. So I just call it the the kettlebell get-up now

It's but but it's a great exercise and it's it's very Specific to jiu-jitsu because the Turkish get-up is basically the same thing as what we call the technical lift in jiu-jitsu And you're gonna use that movement Like if you roll You're gonna use something that looks like the Turkish get-up multiple times within that rule So it that is a great exercise. I definitely recommend people learning the kettlebell get-up I'm actually gonna be in texas in march March 14th, I'm gonna be at a place called rise kickboxing

I'm gonna be doing a Four-hour workshop there and then shortly after that. I'm gonna have a certification here in Burbank I just saw that there was a guy somebody took a picture like a france One of your students opened up a school in france or something student I don't know they got certified by you whatever the fuck You certified them and they went on to open up a school and they sent you like a little video Was it a girl doing the rolls? Yeah. Oh, that's that She's gonna be stoked about that. This is

It set her her handle on this kind of valve power powerful So she reposted a workout that I did like a jiu-jitsu specific bodyweight flow Yeah, so like yeah, man, it's cool man. I have followers all over the world. It's pretty cool man when people do that It's very flattering. I dig it man, you know Somebody in the other side of the world is is doing your shit, you know, but like she she came back She came she's been following my workouts. She purchased my um downloads online So then when she was in town, she came in she got like a couple private lessons for me So she she understands and she's a she's already a trainer and she trains people as well

So yeah, that's that's what you're talking about man, man You're I don't even see you on instagram half the time, but you're on there man. You're scoping people out I'm watching you're watching man. You just I'm watching learning. You're like I'm watching what you're like a ninja mo You're just like watching I watch your people do wrong on instagram on social media people do right. I'm learning Yeah, yeah, man. I'm learning to see if this guy post on saturday. What kind of results is he got? Yeah, yeah, you have to see where your social media is in your world and you're doing a great job with it I mean, I appreciate it man. You know, I do it because I love it man. I you know, honestly, I don't like social media is

Kind of a pain in the butt, but we got to do it, you know, and I always feel like I have to be posting things But you know, I'm happy to be doing it for a living man. It's not it's not easy You think about what you do for people Absolutely go on facebook at nine in the morning And already you got. Yeah. Yeah, that's why that's the way I look at a three minute video Maybe I need to work out a little bit today Yeah, I get that all the time. I have to go to hollywood. I gotta do this I won't have time to go fucking the kick I get that people hit me up and like I see you training at 5 30

Let me do five sets of swings. Yeah, you know make sure you warm up first I think like fucking Like if you look at it Okay, just to let you know people at home if you do Let's say Uh Kickboxing if you do kickboxing for 15 minutes You burned

eight points with weight weight watchers. What if if you do You What is that your weight watchers at kettlebell workout for 15 minutes you burn 10 points Nothing burns more calories than swings. I heard I think it swings and swimming Swing I can see yeah swing swings like and swimming But if they say kettlebell workout, it could mean a bunch of different things, you know When it says, well, no, no, if you when I when I put down when I do my little three three and three It's 10 minutes

And you just use like a light kettlebell 35 I don't there's no reason to go over before I even met you guys Lee and I went to a kettlebell class where the guy would have you swinging 85 pounds And I would do it on tuesday And I couldn't do nothing till friday. Yeah. Yeah. It's the law of diminishing returns exactly with kettlebell If I don't do something twice, I might do I'm not getting so that's like that What's that guy that fought john jack the white dude that has a jiu-jitsu school? And years ago ron wood wood

Roy something roi harris. Oh, yeah, roi harris. I remember I read his jiu-jitsu thing And it was brilliant about why schools aren't doing this and this he goes And I talked to vini magalese told me about a month ago because vini Uh cbd line was looking to get somebody from pfl and I called vini for something. Yeah, and it was funny that Roy harris Roy harris was the one that really made me start thinking about What am I doing with jiu-jitsu because he goes listen when you're over 40

The rules are completely changed and he goes. That's what the problem is today That when you're over 40 you go to a jiu-jitsu class and you feel inadequate because the 20 year olds are kicking the shit out You know, they're just kicking the shit out of you. They're more mobile Whatever, you know, your testosterone starts to decrease at a certain age and he goes I treat my 40 year olds and over completely different That's why they have like the masters training at legacy on sundays, you know He was saying that but the masters only sundays at 8 a.m Sort of fucking kills you because that's the only time that i'm either out of town or who the fuck is up at 8

I work Saturday fucking night. Yeah, you know at 8 o'clock in my house. Yeah, it's still like It's still fucking action Take a look for this one. This is tremendous golly. Oh, this good. This is the root Sometimes you gotta fart this like a italian garlic fart. It's tremendous. Look at him. He's all happy Start putting oil down on floors. He's gonna take other hamstrings. He's gotta drive to ontario Just because you're fucking my hamstring. I'm gonna move a fart I'll keep you down on the couch. That means I'll fucking eat six of those pills Blow your fucking eyebrows off your head. You don't my farts will fucking burn those eyebrows. Oh, my fucking vodka

So no, that's you see that and that's what i'm saying like if you're looking to Really make a splash, you know contact Professor, let's say you live in isle or something. Just get yourself a 35 pound dumbo And contact professor joey. I'm around. I'm fucking what I said dumbo kettle bar. Whatever the fuck, you know, I'm saying that thing What I used to say the thing the thing I can't do the thing. What fucking thing the thing you taught yesterday I don't know what I taught you the thing with the arm and the fucking leg Alberta used to go nuts. What thing the thing? I don't fucking know A comorra. I don't fucking know

Show me that thing that wasn't like a more that was a comma plata I'm a plata. Yeah. Oh my god. He said come a plata. Come a plata. Whatever the fuck it is Go go plata. Oh my plata. Yes. Fuck and I got more platters than fucking anything Listen, look up joey. I've arrived on instagram. What do you put your work on that instagram? Yeah, i see him on facebook. Instagram my facebook everything, man Well, I appreciate you coming on man. I always love coming on here Can I give a shout out to my my sponsor as a kettlebell king? Yes, absolutely always The best kettlebells and rogan still watches your stuff

He says he's fucking crazy if I want to I want to give that guy a workout sometime Fuck I like that over 50. We can't do that complete fucking Kettle thing, but I'm happy you came in. I thank you for having me. I always listen, but I want to let people know 2020 is coming You know I don't agree with people whining that Well, we live in a fucked up society, you know barbie should be fat. No, she shouldn't Barbie shouldn't be fat because you're fat. You're a fat. Fuck cuz you eat. That's why the same way with me I wish I looked like the guy from fucking aquaman

We all do But you're not just born like that. Yeah, you go down to the doctor and take a couple shots But you still gotta lift weights and go to the fucking gym. Yeah, the main thing got in the word healthy, bro Yeah, just being healthy get your blood going get your eye find something that you enjoy doing something you enjoy doing and go for It's 2020 that's it You sat there all fucking year thinking about what you were gonna do and at the end of the day, you didn't do dick Yeah, you didn't do dick So it's over. You got it. That's why I love mondays. I tell people all the time monday's my favorite day of the week

You know why because you got a second chance at everything Comedy jujitsu boxing eating pussy Licking asshole sucking dick. I'd say you're gay. You suck on a friday. You don't do a good job That's why people like your monday motivation man, like that's what it's all about my boy wider I told you about the kid that he's like tell him tell joey. I love his monday monday's is what it's all about It makes you laugh and it gets you out like you let's get the fuck up How can you get pressed if you listen to joey? Somebody's dying to suck a dick out there and you're walking around. I'm having a gloomy day

Yeah, take that dick out and go on a fucking hunt Also, let me let me say something to people like you know how people get really depressed over the holidays and stuff like that, man You know how the student recently talked to me, you know, that's what I think about being a professor like they confide in you You're the priest there. You're the priest my rabbi when I was there with you you were everything I tell you the truth. I can't do it. Yeah, but man, you got to keep your head up, man You know, you always got a you got if you have a roof over your head and you have food, man You know, you got to stay positive and you got to just overcome that and just don't let don't let the holidays get to you And stuff like that man. My mom my mom was her birthdays on christmas day

My brother that rest in peace to his birthday was three days after he was like murdered like six years ago You know, so like but no it happens, man, you know, but it's life We have to move on and we have to you know, just do what we love in life and just stay positive, man You know and just for 2020 don't think about what you don't have Exactly about what you do have exactly and how fucking lucky you are exactly You see somebody god forbid in the wheelchair and you're complaining go fuck yourself Put yourself in his fucking shoes for one day. You little fucking pussy Now cut the shit out. Listen, uncle joey avarado

And listen to uncle joey real quick. The church is brought to you by policy genius Are you covered for life insurance? No, why would you you don't think that way neither did I at 38? But if you start now before you start slipping and you have a pre and 16 condition Everything works out. What happens if you slip on a banana peel? What's your kid your kid still has to go to school? If you're not covered already put life insurance at the top of your to-do list Policy genius makes it quick and easy find the right life insurance at the best price With policy genius, they do all the legwork and you get covered

Go to policy genius calm right now In minutes you compare quotes and get the best possible price with policy genius You can save up to $1,500 a year Don't be a fucking dummy, all right Once you apply they handle all the paperwork and the red tape Policy genius doesn't stop at life insurance either. They can hook you up at homeowners insurance Auto insurance and disability. Listen to pay me asking insurance. It really is in today's world Policy genius makes it nice and easy

So if you need life insurance head to policy genius if you need home insurance Head to policy genius if you need disability insurance head to policy genius calm right now It only takes a few minutes to find the right Insurance company for you and the right life insurance policy Apply and have another thing crossed off your list in 2020 Policy genius when it comes to life insurance, it's nice to get it right and tell them The church or what's happening now sent you there another gift you could do for yourself over the holidays Athletic greens. Joey, what's athletic greens? Listen, it's vitamins

Can you imagine starting your day off with a blast of vitamins? Who's gonna stop you? Nobody if you want to feel tip-top magoo let athletic greens do the work with one scoop You get 75 essential vitamins minerals probiotics prebiotics digestive enzymes and raw superfoods and whole foods They got everything no more pill bottles are trying to choke down a dozen apples It's all in one pack me. I use the travel pack when I'm on the road A little athletic greens is like a daily life insurance You know, I'm out there in new york on all these places. Everybody's fucking I'm going I'm getting them

You know new germ's thrown at me. So I want to be double fucking sure when I'm on the road So I pop a little Athletic greens with some water and it's got everything in there and it's plant-based if you're on keto gluten No chemicals no artificial flavors no artificial preservatives No artificial sweeteners added sugar no gmo's herbicides pesticides wheat dairy gluten corn lactose sucrose Ducrose egg yeast peanut to animal products. These guys are by the book. It's legit guys

You need to take care of yourself and that's why I recommend supplements to everybody. It's easy just add cold water And shake it up. That's it. You can take that banana and shove it up your ass What are you waiting for? Listen the church family You get 20 free travel packs value that 79 dollars with your first purchase So do me a favor go to athletic greens dot com right now Slash church to get your travel pack. That's athletic green dot com Slash church church has also brought to you one of my favorites. I brought one for professor sweet cbd lion dot com

When it comes to cbd products, he's gonna make me sleep. No more voodoo. No more liquor store This is the real deal. I love everybody's getting into the cb Business now these guys I've been with them for years And why I recommended them is because how good their product is my hamstring is getting put together By their cbd products whether it's the lotion Whether it's the gummy bears whether it's the vapor pen which has no vitamin e in it that Are seen that's killing everybody whether it's the the The shatter whether it's the tincture cbd lion has you covered go to cbd lion dot com right now

And look at all the third party test results Your head's gonna fucking blow off your shoulders Go to cbd lion dot com and press in church And get 20 off your first order delivery to your house. This is a christmas present for somebody you love I want to thank athletic greens. I want to thank policy genius and I want to thank cbd lion dot com For having our back. But most importantly, I want to thank you fucking savages for listening Next week's christmas. Guess what you ain't got time to be depressed. We'll be here with you motherfucker. Yeah I want to thank professor joy alvarado. Thank you over at legacy go catch him

He's got a 5 30 a.m. Class a 6 30 uh p.m. Class during the week tuesdays and thursdays And I think it's 11 on saturdays 10 a.m. 10 a.m. On saturdays Go visit him and tell him I sent you besides that have a great fucking weekend. Enjoy yourself shopping Go to amazon do your last uh shopping Use the church of what's happened now link and that's it and that's that Yeah, I want to thank you guys and I want to wish you all a happy holiday season And hannock is around the corner for you fucking jews get ready Sharpen that dick and put some fucking

Resign your shoes. It's time to slip and sue somebody. You know what I'm saying? Anyway, I love you cocksuppers. Happy holidays. Kick this motherfucker muley Place of scanner Well, I've seen the hard times and the pressures been on me Well, I've been on the working like a women man do And I've got my ass together gonna warm all over you You must give me back my muley Put them back before they belong

I ain't fooling around cause I've done had my fun Ain't gon' see no more damage done Shake me back my muley Sweet talking of people don't let me out of town And I've drank enough whiskey to throw the battleship around And I'm leaving this game one step ahead of you And you were hiding in me trying for the good I've seen the blues Shake me back my muley

Put them back where they belong I ain't fooling around cause I've done had my fun Ain't gon' see no more damage done Give me back, give me back my muley Put them back Put them back Where they belong Oh, yeah

And I've been down since my teens I've been on top and in the seas, I long to see I've got the back on feet when better is the day Tell all those special pushers, better get out of my way Back to my place Put back where there's a long way She ain't foolin' around cause I've done and I'm fine Ain't gonna see no little damage done

Give me back my bullets Oh put back where there's a long Give me back my bullets Oh put back where there's a long