Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz - #786 - Childhood Memories with George Kolodinsky Part #2

Episode Date: May 13, 2020

Joey Diaz and Lee Syatt talk then Joey sits down for part two of his talk with lifelong friend, George Kolodinsky. Joey and George met in highschool, lived together in Colorado and New Jersey. This podcast is brought to you by: Blue Chew - Go to BlueChew.com/church and get your first shipment for FREE! Pay only $5 for shipping.   Manscaped - Get 20% off your first order and a travel bag if you purchase “The Perfect Package” at www.manscaped.com/church

Greetings from podcastville the church of what's happened now is brought to you by Manscaped listen, you got no baseball. You got no basketball. You got one UFC fight You got another one tonight right now. It's just you sitting there Scratching your balls on the fucking couch Time to make them look like the 84 fucking Mets Mookie on the left Keith Hernandez on the right Everybody's ready to go listen the engineers at Manscaped have created the perfect ball there trimmer You've noticed when you saw the benefit from the comedy store my balls were perfectly fucking shaved

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Cucksuckers, they just locked us until June fucking 30. Who gives a fuck at this point. We got each other Listen, you may not have no money. You might be fucking licking Dick for a living whatever you're doing. I'm sorry you're in this position. I hope you're not feeling bad if you're feeling You know, I Don't even like saying the word Please call call hit me up on Facebook Twitter Spotify whatever the fuck you got I'll answer you okay. There's a time of year people feeling bad

I'm here to change that around so for starters. If you got a joint, let's park this motherfucker I don't care if it's a square. Who am I the judge? It's fucking Wednesday. You know I'm saying me I'm smoking a little fucking. I don't even know can kiss the door matter door Something from fucking urban trees. They always take care of me over there in studio studio city. I've been told Boulevard. I Love smoking reefer as much as you motherfuckers do I don't know about drinking and then jumping up and down and going to birthday parties But reefer and some music Listening to somebody reading a good book this what it's all about

This is what this quarantines about writing a little bit whatever but here but for right now You're here with your uncle fucking Joey last week. We had Georgie on part one We're just talking about us me selling weed to the Indians and fucking Spraying the bottle and now we're gonna talk about the kidnapping, but it's weird I'm really happy. I'm taking this time to talk to some of my friends I'm not we're not going to criminal stories of people. We mugged or whatever. I just want to tell you that after 40 years I still talk to the same people if I have any accomplishments at all in my life It said I've kept these guys around to keep me grounded. That's why you don't see me at Hollywood parties

That's why you don't see me acting like a moot fucking the law Because in my world, I'm still one of them. I owe it to them these people I put on the podcast and DC develop These guys what I thought about in my darkest times when I was having a hard time and going out I could just go the easy way and I'll sell coke. No No, those people invested time in me And I still got more people calling them they're gonna call and tell you that after people invested time in me They gave me money when I was down and here we are 30 years later. We're doing a podcast and we're just reviving those fucking stories now They impacted my life, you know, it's a beautiful fucking thing when I could give back and

You know, that's it, but it's fucking Wednesday Unemployment and I don't know whatever listen get a gun. I told you that eight weeks ago I tell you to get a gun and to get refunds. He's really gonna reap when I remember a gun You gotta get a gun always just in case you see some guy walking down the street. He's on the fucking cell phone Now you got the mask you're halfway there. You got a white mask on Put the gun in his rib. Listen, I'm just gonna take your wallet Remember if I take your wallet, you didn't see my face hit him with the denero line I know who you are, you know, we are and just run down the street

That's him this later by that time you're in your car his wall is in the sewer Whatever, I'm not telling you to fucking be a thief when I'm telling you you got to get up off your ass and fucking us I don't know what else to tell you. I'm saying I'm doing the same thing in my world. I'm almost ready to do cameos Like I'm ready to fucking call people up. Hi. My name is Jerry Lee told me to call you and say that you're a fucking stinky fuck I don't want to do that yet. You know what I'm saying? I'm still trying to make things. I'm fucking dignity Dignity it is I just can't but I got miles to feed this fucking homeschoolers killing me You know, we all have issues during this the issue for me hasn't been this Being alone none of that shit bothers me. I don't give a fuck if I ever go anywhere again

Don't give a fuck about planes trains or automobiles What concerns me is my daughter, you know, it's How well being I saw how you know, you look at these fucking 23 year olds to late 30 35 year olds a little fucking retarded I'm trying to I'm not talking about you. Yes. I am anyway I just feel that you got to take your kid in a different way. We Somewhere we forgot the parenting thing so I'm taking this as seriously as I can She's at the house waiting me right now. We're gonna draw and she's got to read me three fucking books

Or Tuesday don't fucking work out tomorrow. We do a podcast or Wednesday don't work out We move how to move everything around we used to do a podcast on Tuesday Now we move that the Thursday because she's got to play dead on Tuesday at one and I This is what I'm trying to do and I know I don't put the kids together. They have face masks and they don't Land on the same spot. They ride their bikes I don't have the kids together in circles when we get together. We don't get together with more than two kids It's me and my wife her and our husband and the kids And that's how it's been working out. But that's what I have to do

For her to have peace of mind She also face times. Oh guys comedy is done Just call me assistant principal Diaz. That's what I am now. I'm an assistant principal. I'm checking homework at night I have to fucking, you know draw with her I'm also a part-time gym. I'm the word gym teacher because I sit in a chair And make it throw kicks and punches Because I can't squat that low and I can't put I go on my knees, but I can't stay there for that long So I have to sit while she throws kicks and punches about

But I'm doing all this because I know that I could just leave her in the room one day You know and I could sit in my room one day and I tell you what that's not gonna fly because That's how the rest of her life is gonna be She's gonna have a fucking love affair with that fucking room. Let me tell you something I used to have a love affair in my room But from time to time my mom would come in there and grab me by the hair and say you gotta go out You gotta go

You gotta go like you can't sit here all day And I'd tell her well. I'm scared scared of what when The kids just get the fuck out there. I'm being four or five And then she used to kick me out then there was some times when I was six And then when I went to catholic school on saturdays and sundays when I first lived in north bergen I should have been hanging out with these guys that have been calling in For two years. I lived in north bergen and I never went out I only really was there saturdays and sundays and friday night friday night and hang out with union city kids

Saturday I hang out with by myself in an attic In the mornings, I'd stay in a fucking attic all fucking morning Till this day. I hate that fucking attic till this day I'm pissed off. I want what I am on that attic, but we'll get that shit later I don't like kids staying in I really don't I don't like the concept of games I want you to learn to play a game But you know what you get more from you get more from playing a basketball game and getting an elbow to a head Then playing fucking battleship

Do you know what I am like? I didn't I wasn't into I was the only thing that was around when I was growing up with like mario brothers Whatever the fuck that was right and you weren't gonna catch me on a couch You just weren't gonna catch me on a couch the kids I ran with Weren't couch things they played hockey they played stickball They ran they they played basketball without you know, I talked to friend of mine a couple weeks ago They had a close Hudson County Park down where I'm from in jersey And thank you guys for joining the hills of north bergen

Joy LePore the moderator of that page Reached out to me and he goes a lot of guys from the podcast want to join that page That's a fucking interesting page because joy lepo is two years older than I am And he rides those hills on a bicycle Up and down every day. He does a new fucking video of him The other day he went down the second steepest hill in the country He went down it on the bike. Yeah He survives the fuck. Yeah

Jesus Joy LePore has been Listen, if I would have stayed and I would have ridden my bike or the skateboard or the The fucking what do you think? What do you call those sleigh things when the snow hits a sled bro behind the police station? There is a hill that if you look at you like, I don't know And I did it like 10 times growing up and I almost crashed into cars, you know Because this car is coming the other way what you were sledding down a fuck. Yeah, and then you ain't stopping The momentum behind the police station that hill carmine balzano's father

Lived on that block and whenever it snowed he drove us over that And me and a bunch of other eight or nine dead devils. There were kids that walked up there Dragging that thing looked down and said, I don't think so Because in those days the the shovel would come and then the it would pad the snow up against the cars Yeah, but if you hit like a tire with your head, you would Do you know how many fucking times kids went to the hospital on that fucking thing? I'll tell you why I remember one time I'm exaggerating One time some kid threw his shoulder out. Didn't you have like a hill that we had a hill behind the high school hills everywhere

Do you understand? Yeah, but not on the street. It's the second hilliest city in the country So why didn't you why did you have to do it on the street? Because what are we gonna do on the grass? Yeah, no, that's faggots We fucking what we we were sledding right when we went down a hill we went down a hill on a bike with no helmet All right, you take your chances some of us to walk around squeezing the ball Some of us. All right. We're talking. You know I'm saying. Oh my god. Yeah, there's nothing joey wears a helmet He's 50 fucking seven now 59. I hope he wears a helmet. Yeah, he wears a helmet But fucking 30 years ago if you wore a helmet you were either retarded or we'd smack the fuck out of it

And break the helmet when you were a kid you shut up with a helmet It was getting broken. I didn't wear a helmet for snow tubing Or like sledding, but we did on our grass over I could imagine doing it on cement Concrete all hitting and that's how you stop. Listen. How you stop you had to hit something You didn't just stop on a sled north bergen. You had to bang into something. Oh my god. It was like that thing from fucking. I wouldn't Wide world of sports. Do you remember that? You've talked about it. I don't know if I've seen that the guy falling and he tumbles and shoot the beginning You've never seen that now look at the intro to wide world of sports. I don't give a fuck if okay if they take us down

We're not going to show it But look at intro to wide world of sports That didn't even start as a fucking real intro he did that it fell apart and ABC bought it from him The beginning of this is how you had to stop when you were a kid in my neighborhood. Tell them what the link is Okay, um

I'm gonna try this one says intro says wide world of sports uh intro 1978 Which sounds about right They can't watch it, right? No, okay. They can't see it as long as they can't see it We won't get but they can hear it I turned that off living they can If they want to I can put it in What's this guy

The thrill of victory And the agony of defeat That was me That was me turn that back now There's a fucking video On you stop that stop that because there's a video on there that shows that skier Doing that fall from beginning to end and then turning off the camera and going fuck I didn't know it was gonna be that bad and then ABC got the footage one way or another

That's how I stopped There was no stopping on a ski sled You stopped by hitting the car taking out another pedestrian Or just seeing that we would Bang into fucking Eggersie's wall My man Anthony and Dean Eggersie's house was right there. You were going to the house No, we just stopped at the wall. You got a stitch You just went home and got stitched up and came back. I can't imagine you got a roast beef sandwich and you came back

Oh my god, you guys were crazy These little capsules you gave me are pretty good. I'm dog. Who the fuck you think you're fucking with you think like I Make shit up at night. I caught myself slurring the other day Did you hear me that night? Yeah, I was slurring. I ate like fucking nine of these things This is ultra ultra pills from fucking What's the name of this company? I'll tell you what the name of this shit is I get them every once in a while when I get bored of edibles and when I get bored of everything

I switch them. You know, I like to switch my edibles around right you got to switch your edibles around And I'm doing a lot better anyway because I'm not eating as many edibles That break really fucking helped me wait. When did you take a break? I took a break after my psychological breakdown in March. I had no idea I didn't talk about it publicly. It's nobody's business But then I started getting bored again. I go, what's a quarantine without an edible You know what I'm saying? So I went over there one day and I got a box of these fucking things these Pro tabs I get the indica

ultra Woo loaded. Yeah, they're working. In fact, how many did you eat too? I'm going for like fucking eight of Fuck it It's Wednesday. You know what I'm saying? If it hasn't happened, it ain't gonna happen If it hasn't happened in your world yet, it ain't gonna happen. So who gives a fucking For what the week the month the whole fucking thing. It's Wednesday. We didn't make it happen If you didn't make nothing happen so far, it ain't gonna happen I'm lying. You listen to this Wednesday morning

Something could happen. You still got today. Probably not, but if something don't happen by tonight, nothing's gonna happen But tonight you get your dick suck. Look tonight you get up. You leave you go home. You don't what the fuck am I talking about? You're not even at work after you fucking cock suckers. What you do is You're fucking About I don't know about two o'clock go on my bookie put 200 in there. Let them give you a hundred and bet 300 on the fight tomorrow night tonight You gotta fight tonight. Who are you kidding? You got a nice little fight to share against fucking Anthony. Yeah, that's a nice little fight for yourself

That should take care of the fucking board and so you put on an uncle joey And boom and if it don't happen tonight That ain't gonna happen till next week, you know, you know what I'm saying? Lee, what are you saying there? We got we still got a bottle of quickies to drink here. Absolutely It ain't a party until the fucking until so feel the rent walks in, you know what I'm saying? These people forget You forget we're not here to fuck around. We're here to tell a story We got Georgie coming on part two, you know I

I hope you people could tell Georgie in mind friendship Just by our conversation. I hope you're enjoying these. I hope you're listening to I hope you're not listening to expect something else. I'm not trying to make these funny or anything I'm trying to show you the connection. I still withhold With all my own friends on what they mean to me. This guy means a lot to me and a lot of dog I've gotten hit on facebook. I got some ammunition coming for you motherfuckers. We're gonna give you a break We're gonna give you a little comedy break for a few episodes then we'll go back

To my friends now. I know they're an option and now I know they're willing to tell their stories one of the best stories I forgot to tell with Georgie because he didn't want me to embarrass him was Georgie was hammered one sunday in the afternoon and uh Well, I don't get a fucking pen here I get the fucking do this by myself here What do you got there? Well, you got a little plan. There's a boy. Oh, there you go

Now we just drank a little hundred milligram quickies to get the day started. It's 9 a.m. We're already making it happen You hear that you cocksuckers That's out of respect for you motherfuckers for listening to the show anyway back to the show story with george It's a sunday I'm holding on to like a fucking strong 19 dollars I got 19 dollars and I can't budge. I can't even bump into a nickel The reason why I needed that all I needed was five or ten dollars more to go into the city. I could walk over Well

Get a bag of dope maybe eat some Cuban food. It's fucking sunday. I deserve it I don't want to eat a Wendy's burger. I'm better than the Wendy's, but we need to win these burgers on a fucking sunday So I get up I do my thing. I don't have no no car sales that day. I'm not doing anything and no Well, the what what arrow we're gonna talk about now is 93 We're gonna pretty much end in 93 But uh, I lived with george in cliffside park And I used to work six days a week. I'm on this sunday. I had off

I wake up I eat breakfast somewhere and I come back and george is laying on the fucking Cots like the zombo And uh, I'm sitting there and there's a lady who lives upstairs not a good-looking lady not even a nice lady She's kind of a prick She was always a prick to me. You know like always said mean things I I knew her and grandma were at war. So if you're war with grandma, you're a war with me So I see her outside grilling with her kids And I go she's outside grilling

Her purse is upstairs. I'm guarded So I run upstairs and sure enough the fucking front door is open because I don't know what you people are thinking You lock every door. I don't give a fuck if you're going to the bathroom. You lock the door I open the door. I never there's sure enough a fucking pocket book With a purse sticking out of it with cash So I take the fucking cash put in my pocket close the door and I run down the stairs And I go in the room like nothing now. I know They're gonna blame george

I I fucking know this that they're gonna blame george I take the fucking money. I count that it's eight bills I count that I take it downstairs to the basement and I hide it And I go back upstairs and I just wait And sure enough within the hour We open the door and it's the lady where's george somebody stole my money from my apartment I know it was him. There was a television missing about a year ago. I knew it was him and it wasn't me either I wasn't even living there a year early

So the grandma george's grandma was like, what what are you accusing my grandson of stealing your money? And she's like, yes You stole my money, you know, I'm calling the police and grandma says call the police george George and george is getting up out of a fucking deep haze. He doesn't know anything She goes you you still have money And george is like, I just woke up grandma. What the fuck are you saying? I've been asleep as cocoa. Coco's was there with me and I'm like, yeah I'm just waking up myself. I ain't fucking kidding me. I was already shy when I made believe I was taking the fucking nap

so now the cops come The cops are getting involved. They pull george outside. They pull Grandma outside. I'm sitting on the couch fucking I'm fucking watching the sports baseball like nothing happened And all of a sudden the cops leave Grandma comes back and george comes back and george was so out of it. He didn't realize what had been really even missing

I waited about an hour. I went downstairs and put my best shirt on I went downstairs. I got that 800 I think a cab to the fucking sub to the to the bus station I took the new york bus. I took the a-train down. I took this girl out to dinner I had this little relationship going on with this little girl from bolder. She was a waitress at the comedy club So boom, I come back that night. I feel guilty. I stop I get a couple grams of tutuluts, whatever I get some cash And I throw joys like a hundred but I never

Ever say this to him that I robbed that lady So years later me and george reconnected like in 2099 98 And I go george. What's going on? And then he go, you know, I go george remember the day the lady came And uh, she said that you robbed him and he goes he looked at me weird because he knew he goes It was you I go. Yeah, it was me. You know, I robbed him So we'll laugh him. He you know, he's like I took the fucking blame She broke my balls for years after that. Oh, uh, uh

Flash fast forward to about six months ago It's a friday night. I'm in the town. I don't know what town I'm at I'm about to go on stage and the phone rings and it's george And I could you that's why I don't text That's why I don't text because I want to hear your voice when I picked up the phone I could From the sound of his voice I could hear that his face was pale And I go george, what's the matter? And he goes, you're not gonna believe this

I'm at this bar on the clue side And this young girl sitting next to me and one thing starts soon Now that I start talking to the bartender and I told I grew up with him with terrace And then she says that she grew up on him with terrace also And I asked the way she grew up and she told me the address and I go, hey, that's my address and she goes Yeah, I lived in that building Upstairs from you you and your grandmother. In fact, I remember your grandmother

She goes removed after we got robbed So george turned pale he told the chick thank you and he called me right back and he goes fucking 27 years later that robbery still fucking haunts me anyway Enjoyed part two with george Kyle Dinsky my brother Kick this fucking mule drift league Went house to dodge chrysalis Plymouth and

You know, I tortured dando to death The indians find out i'm putting water in their weed We're torturing jim reberdo jim reberdo ended up poking up with that good-looking chick and got a pregnant Yeah, yeah Some shadow work in the finance in the finance. She was beautiful that woman. She was a good lady too And his wife was hot. It's what yeah, he ended up smacking her around years later. They divorced but So I got into beef with uh jim reber with

Roberto who was a sweetheart of a guy my co-condition at that time I was Up probably five nights a week You know I was snorting coke five six nights a week. I mean, I didn't even sleep I was sleeping probably two hours a night one night a week. Uh, and then the other I was probably sleeping one night a fucking week and You would and I was doing my dick more more nights at the restaurant then I started working more

Because reberdo wound up firing Right jim reberdo. Well, hold on. There's more of this story. I ended up We ended up moving getting the two bedroom house in south boulder across from a rouse Yeah, and they had a strip mall and then the seafood guy At rouse was a cajun From new arleans and they used to make a different food And that was another place I never paid for seafood again

Oh Can I yeah, let me tell you he was at the now first of all we had hercules Was the world's best dog. I mean he was like He was like oh, I was you got a little remember this back then coco Wasn't there with he was Husky, but it wasn't fat We had a heavy bag in the backyard every day he hit his shoulders were rocked out He literally had fists of fucking steel. It was like the rain. No, I was in shape. I was in shape

I was in really good shape. You had meat hands, bro. You were hitting that bag every day Hercules was jumping and you know, we were having a ball. You know, it wasn't just cold We were doing shit. We were young kids. I mean judge. We're 25 years old. You know said it I remember his buddy. Well, lando vodka I bought a I bought a uh Due to newspaper a tv and a vcr so now we got like a 19-inch tube tv We got a vcr now before this we had nothing we had each other at night We would sit down at night drink and look at each other and I'd go to my room

And you were a cat these from here in the area. I was a fucking bar It's not didn't you know, I would go there and you know the food sucked, but But they had them with that meatball grinder. I'm a fucking grinder. They called it but uh so I remember uh We got bigger mushrooms. You remember that we get a bag of shrooms and uh

Song remains the same was on cable So me you and hercules got some stems And we got bigger we but we split like an ounce of mushrooms or rather air pounds each We were fucking tripping and laughing and the dog was fucking rolling on his back And we and that was a crazy movie to watch back then. Yes, it was stone you know and Our main thing was miami lights like that was one time we watched every friday

So every friday was friday nights at nine o'clock before we did anything we watched miami And uh, and uh, and those were the times and I remember About that time. Do you remember? There was a 280z found in not the shopping center by our house cuban kid But a cuban kid in the one by work And he was shot in his like brand new You know 280z. They never covered the body. They just found the They just found the the the car covered with blood

Blood they never found the body back then was You know bolder, colorado's university colorado And where they got 50 000 students that go there. So we're around there. Who knows? When school's out It's a ghost town. You know that now you're talking about a small town It's a city. You know now I I went there. I don't know 10 years you go there more often now But I went back in like 2006 with my daughter playing softball And it's a city. It's a city. It wasn't a city. No, it was a cops. It was what 20 cops

It wasn't it wasn't a big very small town Very small town wasn't them. No, you know, it was 20 miles from them so it was uh small town mentality and You know, I'm not the brightest guy, but I'm smarter than everybody fucking there. They just that was the thing that we had I think we we just

Had a different mentality and we we We were caring, but if you had a weakness we You know, you found that weakness people were too fucking nice They were You know, and it was a new york virus. You know, they didn't really oh me personally. They didn't you know Boulder at the time they were praying for earthquake that would take California to the ocean because that's what they want. They had it was like california with snow. We're all laid back

You know boulder was a very Boulder was a very very very nice town It was nice for us to live in we had the world by the balls, but Like now i'm ashamed to go back to boulder because of all the bad things Like that's route supermarket. I had the dog. I never paid for dog food We would I just I used to just walk up to it I would put it under the fucking supermarket thing and just walk out of the supermarket with it Or I just pick it up and walk on with dog food

The routes now the first like my personal fucking playground Is that is that we would go in there? We would go in there and literally buy like a thing of bananas and a couple of apples Maybe a box of cereal because we Cocoa was eating this iron man cereal. It was like working out back there iron man iron man cereal and then uh We would stick like like fucking like animal house

We would stick steaks and chicken and all of this We would wear baggy shirts and walk out of there with like, you know 100 And then go to a register and pay, you know four bucks and then On top of that a 50 pound bag of dog food on the way out and then we became friends at the butcher And they loved us They loved they loved us And they had no idea we weren't paying

That's how much they loved then we became friends at the butcher who was a guy from new all leans And he would say to me I did this for you today He would make he's the first person ever to turn me out to fish kebabs He'd make like swordfish with shrimp and All these things that he marinated in the jump in a gumbo lyre type thing like a Seasoning and I would go in there and he'd give me four of them And I'd put them under my arm by a six pack of soda

And I'd look at the way to the the girl and go I already paid for these at seafood She would never even ask me Like it was just like it was just It was like a free-for-all You know the money I was making I sold coke to snorkeling So every day somebody called me that was looking for coke and I would

Snorkeling and it was like George is my roommate But George was doing his thing and I was doing my thing It was the weirdest life now when When did you start seeing the change in me that you felt something Well, you know it is funny because I remember I I didn't do this and I was a fucking pig I remember I used to like do my laundry Remember throw it on my bed. I used to sleep on my laundry

Like I didn't even I didn't even have drawers there. I just had like a fucking pile of clothes Which I brought way too many out there, but What happened was uh a couple of things remember so that or lent We were we had this little routine. We watched the tv then one day we walked in and the tv and the vcr got stolen And it was like, you know, we only had like three or four people or ever over to the house So that kind of like Dampened everything, you know, and we don't have it, you know, we didn't have We didn't have we had money for everything else to not

The one thing that we really enjoyed doing in my home, you know, which was was watching tv. So You know, you were a little pissed off because you knew it was someone you knew I didn't know anybody. I thought it was you and you thought it was me Like we thought in my mind. I'm like he thinks I stole it because I mean, I had to be right. You had to be right to think that way, you know But I remember like there was something The first time I saw your face You we were freaking out on me about something. I would have because I'm annoying so

you know I guess a little so I think I didn't do the dishes or something and you took the dish and you fucking smashed it You know, you're like clean this up. So you went out with kathy king And uh, you know, I clean up the glass and do the dishes. I put the fucking plate in the garbage But you know, he comes in you come back in and kind of apologizes to me He went to throw something out and the fucking dish got my arms were rock The fucking plate sliced his arm like fucking four inches

like Big are you you got a scar still? No, I went away. Uh, it went away. I got good skin You know, after we apologized you went to the garbage and now he's like what the fuck And all of a sudden blood's coming out and all of a sudden boom He goes down like a fucking tree in the forest I'm like Such a tough motherfucker I put a patch on it and went to sleep

And yeah the next morning and dealt with it the next morning and you needed stitches. I was a that was like Yeah, I needed stitches The third story that you told about like just going to sleep with a wolf. Yeah, I don't I don't go to hospitals I don't I don't do no that shit But I could tell that george I could tell that I wasn't happy. It was about a total of 87 and it was

I think Like I love george But I could tell it wasn't working for him And I got to be I couldn't get a job in a frame shop. Yeah, and I got to be I would have been happy to do that It wasn't working for me either Even though I had a girlfriend And I had all the direction I had everything I wanted I had my best friend with me

I had a job that if I didn't do coke I was making money If I didn't do coke I'd make money at that job that job paid 45 hundred a month Okay, that I'll fucking retard can't make money off of 45 hundred a month People go to college to make 45 hundred a month. I was making going to school I was taking classes at night and the whole thing But something just wasn't right Like I had a problem then that everybody has that they They're their own worst enemies

Yeah, they're their own. I'm your I'm my own worst enemy. I get in my own way So I got into an argument and I left you You stayed working at Jim Roberto's. This is how I know and you'll find out in a couple of minutes I quit but you stayed working at Roberto's And then I went over to Bill Krauss Subaru, which is a hundred yards away from you Right in those days. It was a hundred yards away. It was down the block And I went to work over there And I still remember

Like the second day Like going back over there, but I didn't really want to be there Like I'm back at Boulder right back at Boulder I started at that place I'm like, why am I fucking here? What the fuck am I doing at this place? I started here and this is a criminal place This is what criminals hang out

But there was money to be made there Yeah, you could make a lot of money at that place selling Subaru's You just had to learn how to cut through the red tape They had a new manager named Wayne means Who was a great guy and they had a guy who had my back named Jimmy Wheeler Jimmy Wheeler was one of the exceptional men that I've met in my life He took me under his wing and he goes, you're gonna be fine this time Nobody's gonna fuck with you, blah, blah, blah, blah

There was a guy named Grant Few Smith That was a floor manager there. You didn't know him He was kind of a scumbag in a way But I go to work over there And I mean my second day there My second day there like I leave Fucking Chrysler Plymouth So I could get my life together like that's all I wanted to do

Was just be a good salesman make money And figure out a way how we can make money and get the fuck out of here And go back to North Bergen with a fucking pound of blow like heroes I wanted to be a hero me and you with a parade throwing packages out to the street You know, that's what I thought and my demented Cocaine mine. That's what I really thought so you didn't you didn't have like goals for like I had no fucking goals for nothing My goal was to be a drug ching-a-ping like they were on Miami Vice My goal was to have a blonde and a testarosa

And to have a boat and to have parties on a boat But I didn't know how I was gonna get there. I wanted all these things But I couldn't even fucking control myself To go for a fucking walk Like the only thing I did positive in those days was I stuck to hitting the bag and walking hercules Everything else I did was negative There was nothing positive. I took classes at night at the university You were getting very depressed. Yes, which you do you still do like as november rolls around and right now

Unlike your childhood friends. I I didn't know you when your mother was alive I knew you after what I did know as that time of year came as he approached Thanksgiving November 8 Right So I had to go a little crazy, you know a little going back And that's when this shit was was was growing up and you were not a great, you know You lost a pep in your step. You weren't you you you changed, you know internally. What happened was this George

Here I am I'm in fucking Boulder, Colorado. I'm doing good For my standards, I was doing very good I had a job. I was making money I probably had insurance I was driving a car. I was dressing nice But that wasn't good enough see my friends in north bergen were going to hunt the mountain every weekend Snorten eight balls of coke

And that's what I wanted to do. God forbid I could do the right thing in those days God forbid I could do the right thing We always made a choice sometimes second fucking day at bill crowd Subaru They hire a salesman I look at the guy he's been there before And I thought you had gotten rid of all these type of people So they hired two guys that I knew were troubled one guy's name was tom ohm

Oh HM One of those guys that was a good looking blonde surfer dude He looked like the guy That stole the chick from John Travolta in Greece He had that wrinkled look He had that wrinkled look at the end not to nicky The other guy that that had the ugly girl cha cha at the end

On your hand time, baby. Oh, yeah All that shit and He had bad like he was just a A fucking scumbag type of fucking dude. So I don't know what we're talking about. What are we talking about? Uh, they hired to High as his own guy

And this guy named Vella now. I had known Vella Vella was a very good looking guy pussy magnet But Vella hung out with the geb hard boys Who owned geb hard bmw? They were rich little boys They buried themselves like Leonardo DiCaprio And they had money When you were at a bar and the geb hard boys walked in there was a big deal You know, there was three of them. They had coke. They had blow. They had butt bitches

And their father owned the bmw store Vella was a hanger onto them I Nice kid But I could tell I was going to flip this guy somewhere along the line In those days whenever I met you it was just to size you up You were allowed to do what you did because I let you do you know what I'm saying? And like you saw me in 85

You know when I went through Ari's window, I wasn't scared or nothing And if he was home, I would have kicked him in the stomach What my frame of mind in those days was completely different than the frame of mind I have now You were going down. It was either you or me And if it's you or me, you're gonna go down and guess what nothing's gonna happen You're not gonna call the cops. You're not gonna do nothing because I'll break your fucking. I was out of my mind I was angry. I was angry about my mom's death I had no time to fuck around. I would fucking stab you. There's no time

So I'm on the car lot two days and then walks this fucking Kent veller and sure enough Like I'm pissed I'm really really this is hard to sell But I'm telling you people that I'm pissed because for the first time I just want to sell cars make ten grand a month And get myself out of this position so I go home and be a regular fucking guy. I'm out here living with these fucking

bumpkins Wearing fucking Birkenstocks Driving Subaru's. I'm from the land of Cadillacs and white shoes. You know I'm saying Why are you wearing fucking Birkenstocks floor? No capesios No, nothing You know, you got to go see live music three hillbillies singing let it skinning. I couldn't take it no more So I remember it was monday night football

And I called Mike Askelis And it was in october and he's telling me about these parties they're having Up and hunt them out and they killed the bear with cocaine They fucking did this and this And I'm like, what am I doing? I'm taking two classes a week at the university of colorado I'm dating this chick who's a very nice girl And I got George I got George out here with me

We're not doing shit together. You know, he's over there making hourly wage. I'm over here fucking fight for my life and Two days later veller gets hired And he says to me can you give me a ride like I mean 10 in the morning I'm already aggravated that he's dead. I'm like God damn it. They gotta bring a fucking guy here who does coke. This is the last thing I need I just want a job with people in normal But sure enough, you know flesh is weak like the bible says

That he tells me you want to take a ride to the liquor store You know, most people went to lunch. He's like, let's go to liquor store went to liquor store He gave me two bumps of this shit. That was ultrasonic I did it and then that night I go, can you get me more of this? And he drove me to his house and he goes my roommate's got two pounds If you could fucking help me steal it. I'll give you some I got a dui because at that time there were three major news things that happened in boulder

One thing was that cuban kid got beat up. He never found his body Number two another drug dealer Got broken into in his house and he was so scared. He jumped out the balcony And he broke both his legs And number three, uh, there was something else lurking Something else that happened. So I meet vella We go back to his house the first night. He shows me the coke Tells me the deal that he would want to do

And I get in my car to drive home and I already know I'm gonna I'm gonna rob this motherfucker But I had a big problem george I wanted to involve you but it wasn't your cut You're not That's not your thing. You're a good getaway driver You're a good this you're a good you're good in a lot of You gotta remember you gotta remember initially

You met him you're like listen 1245 Grab a car Drive meet me at the crisis dealership. It's gonna take 20 minutes. I'm gonna run in and out And I'm like, are you sure he goes? Yeah Tuesday Definitely Tuesday 12 30 you called me at work at like 12 and you're like, you know what? It's not good

We're not gonna do it. So I was initially And I spoke to my attorney. So I'm not uh, legally uh, uh, there's no conspiracy here, but We were gonna do it But then it turned from like two days, you know, we're gonna do it thursday Then you're like, no, no, no, no. So now it was like the next week And I'm like, you know what? There's no way that that's there. Whatever you saw is not there You're like, there's a pun there. So now you involve Mr, uh, 10 while

That's where he came in And I'm like, you know what good luck because it just doesn't and you're looking out for me like, you know No, no, no because all those days even when I lived in jersey, I was doing a bunch of shit But I would never involve you because you had a mom and a grandma And a dad and I would never want to involve you. That was why that was my big thing Lee we're gonna do this But that part I'm gonna do because If I get caught I have I have nobody you got a mom and a dad

You just sit in the car you get that gun ready. You got my back But I don't want you doing this if anything happens take off in the car You were just sitting back there talking to a friend Don't do time. I was old school If I did a crime, I'm doing the time because you got parents I don't have parents and that was my motto Now what level of crime like were you the only one taking the the food out of the grocery store? Or was it just just for big stuff

That george couldn't do Oh, no, I took the food. Are we both took food like that? Okay, those are little things I'm talking when a weapon wasn't bowed I had to kick down a door or something. I would never take a friend of mine that didn't Need to be there I would say to you I'm gonna kick this office in I want you to park over there and watch my back. Listen to the police scanner You know, whatever you need to do

So I'm safe But as soon as you see a cop don't play cowboy Don't go over there. Just go home. Let me figure it out. I'll run I'll call you the I'll call you at 11 at this pay phone If I make it out of there, I'll call you at this pay phone. So That was the thing. I didn't want george involved. I woke up that morning It was a tuesday morning 18th of november. I know you weren't happy With your life. I wasn't happy with mine

And I uh Went to the dentist. His name was kevin sessa md I got my teeth fixed and it was like It was like everything else in my life. It was decided right then Like it wasn't planned. It was like when I left kevin sessas And I got in the car. I called tidwell. He said everything was in place I called vela. He said the coke was ready

And I go i'm coming over there to pick you up. You didn't even know what was going on I went to velas. I walked upstairs He did a couple lines with me. He showed me some money So I knew there was shit in the house Yeah I go, all right. I go, where's the kilo? And he goes, he's got it hidden in the ceiling So I guess that was a popular hiding place everybody

Had suspended ceilings Yeah, yeah, it's so I fucking did what I had to do. I drove vela We've had this story once before I drove them You know when I got there tidwell, I go tidwell Bring tidwell a sample Tidwell is going to take the sample to his people get money and then come back And then we'll figure out how to rob him tidwell jumped a gun As soon as I gave tidwell the sample tidwell ripped out the machine gun

And instead of saying joey getting the room He involved me in it already So now vela knew that I was in on it. It was supposed to play out That he was robbing both of us. I was even gonna empty my pockets He was a moron but tidwell was a fucking moron So once tidwell did that I was stuck already So I we you know, you had a handcuffed tidwell whatever vela Put him in the room with the pit bull

and then I sent tidwell over there Now I knew there was 1800 in the draw When tidwell came back he said there was 300 in the draw And right there I knew he was bullshitting to me and there was only an eight ball There was a lot more coke in that draw. There was about an ounce and a half in chunks in that draw So I said okay motherfucker, and I like I can't believe you're doing this to me And he goes what what are you talking about? I I didn't know what the fuck you were talking about

So I had like a little 32 That I had had from my aspen colorado days that even you didn't even know about it And I was thinking of shooting them both george I was thinking of just shooting them both Because you knew where the house was nobody whatever not my house At tidwell's house. I was for one second there I said i'm gonna shoot both these motherfuckers Because this is gonna go this went wrong already

This is already wrong. I got a hundred miles in my pocket and fucking a little bag of coke This could not have happened For this and I knew was gonna happen george I knew I was gonna I knew was gonna fuck up somewhere along the line It was my civic duty to myself To go on with it. I went over the 22nd and canyon I went right through then in the house. I fucking ripped down I ripped that house apart and I found more coke than there was in there

So this day, I can't tell you what I did with the coke I don't know. I don't think we did. No, I brought some home. I brought some home A little bit home and I gave you some You went to the bar and I stayed in the apartment. No, and then but a lot happened after that I came home. I told you I was done We were nervous. Kathy king came over. She had a perm Then me and her got into an argument outside and you came out and stopped us And then tidwell came over and he goes. I want you guys

To go on a ride with me. I got another hotel. We could rob. Do you remember that? Because he needed the money By this time he needed the money badly But he had tried to fuck me. So I said, fuck you You're not fucking me. Now you need the money more than I do So he needed the money for a stripper That that was he needed to get a divorce before she sucked his dick I mean this whole story is just retarded. This is the gang that couldn't shoot straight

This is me being one idiot Tidwell being another idiot, but this was God's way of telling me this had to happen. You know what I'm saying? Like this has to happen So you don't remember us being back at the place arguing and then vella knocking on the door And all I remember is you did go to catties. You wound up with catties Because I don't even remember the cops coming to the house. No, what happened went to the dealership, right? Yeah, what happened was that night and then you turned yourself in the ninth night kidnapped vella I went back home

You went out I got pretty fucked up on the couch. I had to think about my next move I didn't know for the guy I gave the coke to if I could trust him I didn't know how long till I was gonna get the money I needed to get you and I a plane ticket out of there Because either that or The chambers brothers are gonna come get us. That's whose coke it belongs to greg chambers. Oh I still remember his name. He was the original dealer

That that vella was holding it for Greg chambers something like that. So chambers was still gonna come looking for us So I had to figure it out. So I said, you know what? I'm not gonna figure out nothing I'm just gonna sit here snorkeling And when I wake up in the morning, I'll come up with an idea. There's nothing I can do now It's 10 o'clock tidwell was all vella was already in the trunk When tidwell came over to the house, he had vella already in the trunk

And he goes, I don't know what to do with him. Uh, I don't know But there's one guy that has a hotel that has ash We could go take him down like we ain't doing nothing Our relationship is over. You shouldn't have fucked me at vella's house I didn't fuck you. I just didn't find it. I go. Yes, you did. It's in your pocket I go get the fuck out of here. Don't come back and then he left You went across the street to the fish market I fucking stayed in the apartment and I passed out

When I woke up the next morning you were gone I didn't even go to work because I didn't have to be at work till two So I woke up to banging on the door from a guy called I don't know redheaded guy white dude freckles. He had uh, Brett Blazin Brett hazin No, that was his name Blazin Brett hazin From where? Well, what was this guy? He was from Colorado. He lived he was the lot man

At bill kraut subaru at the time So the cops had the building surrounded He got a car ran to my fucking house Banged on the door and he goes dog The cops got bill kraut subaru surrounded Swats over there. They're looking for you Well, they're trying to get your address Wayne means is fighting them off as we speak Because they had the old address

From where you and I lived, right? They didn't have the new address. So I had a couple minutes. You were gone You're gone. So now I get two minutes He says I got to go I washed my face I eat a handful of fucking iron man cereal I brush my teeth and I run across the street As I'm running across the street I can see a detective cause I go I go to that rouse

I get a legitimate breakfast and I call my now ex-wife girlfriend at the time And she's in the head color in school Do you remember she was in head client school Now I'm calling you because I could call you at the lot But you're on a delivery run. You're not answered So finally I'm sitting there and I'm like what the fuck am I gonna do at this rouse or king soup is

King soup king soup is I go. What the fuck am I gonna do at this king soup is I got cash I got my wallet. I got everything I need. I got more than what I need. I even got coke on me But guess what I don't have reefer man I just had a brand new batch of reefer. I used to put it in the purple bags Do you remember you used to borrow my weightlifting gloves then?

Maybe I got mad at you because I had weightlifting gloves and you borrow them to go out like one night like flansey They match my capizios They match a capizio so fucking we went to I tried to call you nobody answered I called catty and I finally had the school call me back And catty got on the phone. I said listen they they found out about tiddwell I had no idea how they found anything out I told her to come get me but in the meantime

The cops went to my house knocked on the door Open the didn't kick open the door. They got the landlord To open the door. You were at work They they didn't go inside. They you know, they they're real cops They didn't search the place or anything They came out they They acknowledged I wasn't there and what they did was they put a police car on the edge of the block So

Kathy king was coming to get me. I got no reefer How's this gonna work out? So I walked around the block the long way and I snuck in my backyard. I gave hercules a kiss I got my weed and I walked back in front I remember the cops sitting there and me walking in front of the cops And them not knowing it was me Like this is just craziness Then Kathy king came and got me on a wednesday

I called you from a pay phone You had already known the cops were looking for me and thursday morning. My name came out in the paper Remember the story came out The bolder camera the bolder camera and that's what fucked you up that jim reberto Called you over and said look Your buddy's name is in the paper and that crushed you That crushed me. I made the bolder paper for kidnapping at first it said Uh, steven tidwell and they're looking for an accomplice

In wednesday and they thought it was connected To that dude in the parking lot that was so this is what people don't understand. I'm trying to say it on so I didn't turn myself in because This has been a string of this shit had been going on I didn't know what they knew what they didn't know You didn't know nobody knew I didn't even know tidwell that good the cops didn't even come see you

They didn't know I stayed up I went I got Kathy king to drive me up to the house On Thursday night I said, let me go back into town and I got A copy of above the law and leave the weapon. They were the hottest movies of the week out I rented them. I went up there and then that friday. I said, you know what? Don johnson's gonna marry

Melanie griffin no The one that prints fucked from australia Oh shena easton shena easton Uh don johnson was gonna marry on miami vice. Oh, yeah Let me turn myself in this is to to let the people at home. Listen. This is to how fucked up my world was I had just finished kidnapping now It had all been released in the paper Guy got caught in a guy in a trunk of a car

With a machine gun and an accomplice. They're looking for an accomplice I go down to get the movies on 30th and iris There's a kmart across the street from kokos And there's an albertsons I go to the albertsons first I buy some groceries And then I go get my movies and then I go, you know what? Let me call these fucking cops and see what's going on

I fucking call the cop. They left a number of bill kraut subaru I call the cop and he goes hold on they kept putting me on hold hold Hold hold because they were tracing the call. I was trying to trace the call I kept holding the call hanging up on them And I told them I go, I know exactly what you motherfuckers are doing You're trying to trace the call and I they go. Jose Turn yourself in where are you and I go, you know where I am

Come meet me. I'm at the albertsons On 30th street, I wasn't no fucking albertsons. I was in the parking lot of abos pizza So I could see them straight on So as I'm rolling my joint, I could see the swat trucks And cop cars pull up with their guns drawn And they all flew into albertsons And I'm like I'm in trouble That's what I realized

I did something wrong Something's not right here and my cocaine head I just stole a couple ounces from a guy. I did the job the cops are favor And then that friday I woke up with my cocaine mine again I told my wife to drop me off to get a hold of you And uh, that would be up by the afternoon I'm gonna go in there and talk to the cops I'll be out by miami vice. Make sure you get chinese food

Until george. I love them. I'll see him later. And then I walked into Ring the bell and I'm going who are you and I'm like jose dears. Hi And then go hold on. There'll be a sergeant opening the door for you And I'll never forget him opening the door and ten cops Were up had their guns pulled And they're like get on your hands and knees You're getting charged with kidnapping one kidnapping two aggravated robbery and I'm like I still remember you coming to visit me

Yeah, you came to the To the uh boulder county boulder county jail Took me two weeks to get out Uh, and then when I got out that was when it was sad between you and I There was nothing you could say there was nothing I could say I let you down I thought you thought in your mind you had let me down, but you didn't I had let you down. I had put you in this bad position Now jim reberto

I I was surprised that did well didn't didn't even mention I kid kid well squeal like a like a big yeah, he ratted me out completely you know And yeah, this is against the law what happened, but You know there was no longer among thieves he was but I was really surprised. I mean you obviously didn't mention me at all and I didn't do anything

But no, I think I did think about it I'm strongly considered without tid well just walk in take it and that no not even having contact with anybody Because it looked like an easy score It wasn't easy score. It was too easy to be true and that's why I got Came they became more than it should and again You desperate times desperate measures you weren't in your right mind You know and and you you put trust in somebody that

Is not the kind of guy that you Ram no, no, I was looking for rego He was like a wimp with a gun. Yeah, he watched Rambo too many times. No, he was this guy was not even a tough guy He was no, no, he thought he was The more fatigues he had He had a pimple He had sunglasses. He had a tattoo His car had tinted windows

Even tidwell was a man who You know george's from cliffside. I'm from north bergen And there's we have like a code where I come from, you know, you're never going to see us with a scarf Or a hoodie or a goatee. That's perfect Tidwell had all those things tidwell had everything that a man needed to get attention And nobody gave a fuck about him. He was a retard But anyway, that that's not

at anything so About two months past we don't say much, you know, we live in the same house I'm heartbroken. I know you're heartbroken, you know And you got a job in the city your mom got you a job working for gloria vanda built or whatever and And you go back to new york and I could tell you're sad, you know No, you know what you promised me this job with leona helmsley. We own a helmsley. We own a helmsley At hotel which I didn't get like I didn't need to get the job

But it was time for me to go. No, it was time for you to go because you were going away You you know You know, you were working though. You were working again. You were selling cars. Oh, I was doing I was doing everything to stay out of prison And it seemed that It seemed that you moved in with manning when I left right when you left I moved in with manning and then We flew you back in august 15 trial. I flew in for the trial for you to test my bad

A character witness Yeah, he was my character. So he didn't ask me anything about what happened because I was scared but We had to go to I still remember you child and that was one of the saddest days of my life You flew in on a sunday and we had to go to the attorney's office and do like uh A meet with him like he was gonna ask you different questions and just run you through it What did you feel the next day in court? I was scared shit because

number one, we will I think we partied from the second I got I left. Yeah. Oh, yeah I think I slept four hours before I had to testify and uh You know, it's a blur. It was just You know Me trying to stick off here, but Didn't fucking matter. I mean, basically I was there to try to reduce your sentencing because you were done You know, we all knew it. We just did we just didn't know the number

You know what? I mean, you didn't know like it's just like tv. You're gonna get probation because It's such an innocent Can't say innocent but I mean you're robbing something from you know, a thief is stealing from a criminal So, you know, but in the law's eyes, you know, you know It's not that so It's you know, then it's like me trying to put a put a bandaid on a gunshot

I'm not you know What it really was was a trip to say goodbye before you went away because it was nothing I was gonna say I had no revelation. I had no Nothing to add other than you know, I love him. He's dirty. He's my big brother. He takes care of me. You know They didn't give a shit what I have to say You know, I remember walking back there with my suit on and waving at you goodbye and I felt uh Very disappointed like you were there Duffy was there

Russo was there They had come it was a hard thing. I mean it was hard when I left. You had to call my dad You know To send me a ticket home. That was a hard, you know, he picked me up at the airport You know, there was no internet. There was no You know, he didn't know what was going on so You know, my dad grew to really love you

It's weird because he he was a good cop and it was a straight cop and when he heard all of this shit I mean, obviously he was disappointed and he doesn't really you know, he's he's still alive in Florida He's a good man and uh You know, it was just hard to tell him because he was still on the job You know what I mean? So But he loves you He loves your movies. He loves it. You know what I mean? Oh, no, he turned

But he was really disappointed and you were like a thing. I couldn't really disappoint my grandmother Everybody everybody was disappointed. I mean I was disappointed I was disappointed in myself, but it was nothing I could do Once I got in there. I said to myself there was nothing I could do But that week before I got arrested The reason why I I named I named that name Grant Fusmith Was because I didn't like Grant Fusmith at all. I didn't like what he stood for He was like a redneck

He was a vagus guy. He was very neat But Grant Fusmith was the first person That came up to me and he goes, do you mind me having a word with you? And you know, like when you don't really like somebody You're like, yeah, man. What is it? What? And he goes, I just want to tell you that Just what I did before I did this for a living and I go what and he goes I was a vagus guy I worked in vagus And he goes if I know one thing

You're a true comedian He goes you should get into comedy Uh, you should try it. You should try stand up and I told him to get the fuck away from me And now I feel like hunting them down And all right, you're gonna fucking slip in there. Lay your balls on his face. So let you do that So then you left Yeah, I didn't see you from

87 88 till 91 I told the wedding uh Oh, then I saw you for the wedding You came to my wedding in 89 Which was an out flight too Which was carrying pictures pictures on the on the plane to go to your wedding And working at the gallery and I were two or three pictures

Back when there was stewardesses not flight attendants And you know, so you can walk in there with these two big things flirt with the the hot chick You know, put these where your coat goes. There's no problem got off the plane with these two things And then uh, I didn't I didn't remember the wedding. I didn't remember you coming to the wedding Oh, I was your best man right Because runny was too runny plane got the raid his plane got the way he was too fucked up And he was where but he didn't get there in time. So I was in us sure

And then last minute I was your best man and I'm like And that was uh, I mean that that shh Man that wedding I can't believe that wedding even went off All right That was the crew that was there was tommy russo and and who else That was runny. There was a lot of crazy people from north virgin. I think I'd start with runny And he had been up from the night before

Was peep. He'd leave mary lou there, right? Yeah, he'd leave and mary lou I mean there were just a lot of people there My probation officer was there because I got I got married 99 of 89 September 9th of 89 So I already had an eight ball in my pocket. I got specially signed out That dude from florida got it. I didn't know it was a really good guy spanish guy. It was cuban too That was the first time I met

Julio A big cuban guy He had what? He had a big bag. Yeah, there was a guy. Julio Rodriguez There was a guy Julio Rodriguez and then I didn't see you guys from out there. There was a guy from out there That's what I'm saying. He was a cuban guy Julio Rodriguez. He was a cuban guy His father was the best pool

The best pool player in cuba People came to cuba to play against him Sinatra Gleason So he was known as the best bialing cool The kid's doing something now. He's a big time Poker player, but that's who you met Julio Rodriguez. He was a different kid, but So now you leave me for the wedding

91 I show back up at your house. It's a different time now Yeah, we're not doing coke no more. I'm I'm still doing coke You're smoking crack or whatever the fuck you're doing up there in the Bronx or whatever I was dancing with the devil. You were dancing with the devil I went back there for a week and all we did together Was party and then I came back by that time I had already gone on stage This is when you first started Right, so I got on stage July august

I knew something wasn't right And then I went to visit you My wife told me she goes something's going on with you. You might need a little vacation Go to new york. I went to new york. They gave me a white fucking car Like a white cat like I ran And it was like a He's a big white car White cop car

So I would take george into the city to cop and nobody would want to talk to us Because they thought we had a fucking cop car So we couldn't get cocoa weeds from anywhere. It was a fucking nightmare So I come back to I stay with george for 10 days eight days too many Because it was just too much. It was like I went back fucking blown out of my head and Yeah, I think I was back a month before she said we're gonna get a divorce

And then I went that trip did it. I think he wrapped up the credit cards through the roof She was rapid. She was flipping and then I fucking Got into comedy full time Really was working it In the beginning it was like sucking the whole thing and then I yeah, he hasn't me a notebook You handed me a notebook and you're saying And Just just do me a favor whatever you do whatever just keep writing just write whatever

And then we'll talk about it and once in a while I would scribble something but in the meantime, I'm taking you To all these different you needed to bring somebody to get on stage right so 93 I get into trouble and I call you You're in trouble. You had to go away for a while I wait for you to get out of your situation And now you and me are a team made in hell. You got your own problem And I got my own fucking problem and we're staying with grandma, but you and I both know it That we call each other once a month and talk about one of those nights at grandma's house Because every night was an adventure at grandma's house

It was me oh my god And I could tell you people right now if you were if we would have put those that footage on tape Signed for wood and had a career right now Nothing was funnier Then that show what is that that's grandma right there And lee's got some footage Of grandma saying some racist stuff. We're gonna dig up Yeah, we had that when we said the documentary she she she's the missing part of that documentary

She was she was my family out of respect. They they pulled it but She passed And uh, I'm dying to see it because I gotta tell you one thing. She was fucking She was on the roll that day She was on the roll that day. So I move in with you In 93 and I'm cutting my teeth in comedy Yeah, I'm cutting my teeth in comedy. I mean I had stand-up comedy by judy carter I lived on the bed. You lived on the couch

We weren't even social distancing I got my coffee and judy carter right If somebody would have came into the room they would have gone these two guys are gay Because the beds are too close to one another and I think I stayed with you for nine months from February to october of 80 of 94 93 And if I have to like, you know, like what president trump came on the news a couple weeks ago

And he goes americas and they go into the toughest three weeks of your life If it wasn't for the humor That was going on between our lives I wouldn't have been here right now That was the toughest time That was the toughest I ever worked In my life as a human being Frustrated confused

But I knew what I wanted. Do you know what I'm saying? You were selling cars in the city You were getting pamphlets those though. You were going to offices giving those You know, like like booking like your office to comes to a comedy comic strip or whatever you were doing that thing And you were going on stage Any open mic any way It was the work I was leaving the house

At 7 30 in the morning Because mr. Rago used to drive the bus And if I didn't take the seven o'clock bus, I would have to pay a dollar I didn't even have the dollar to get on the bus Mr. Rago will let me on the bus at 7 30 in the morning I would go into this I had one white shirt One white shirt, but I wore the same shirt every day

This is why when people come to me and tell me they're working And this is what i'm doing. I laugh because I know the results from hard work I was leaving my house at seven I was working till the I was at the car lot till eight at nine In between eight and nine I would run over to a boxing gym I paid 25 a month for a lock

And I had a gym and I had t-shirts and a shirt there So when I left 57th and 12th Was where I worked I worked on 57th and 12th 11th avenue down there at anis on the massy Cadillac And when I leave there I would run to the gym do a little faggy fucking workout hit the bag lift some weights I would put on stand-up comedy clothes And I would bum around the clubs in the city And then when I got sick of selling cars

I went to work at hash ways at lunchtime Yeah I would get up in north burn listen to what I would do I would wake up in clear side of grandmas and walk to where essy lives to the To where that hotel where they built that hotel in tunnelly avenue Yeah, they had a gym there on the third floor I had grown up with those kids when I was a kid their house They their father's business burned down and my mother helped him

So they told me you don't have to pay for the membership Just come So I was it jumpers. It was no it wasn't jumpers. These are two cuban kids This this is on 67th street in tunnelly avenue. There's a there's a hotel there now Just to show you the commitment of my work At that age at that age it was 1993 I was 30 I would get up at eight and walk From clear side parking jersey to 67th street down the hill

Do a weightlifting workout Take a shower Walk up the hill to north bergen The hash ways I I'd work and I'd work till two I'd deliver sandwiches And then I'd run to your house Take a shower and put a suit on and I would go drive a limo Dris, right. I don't remember the limo. Yeah, I drove a limo and I would go to you

I would go to fort lee's I would go to england clips and pick up the news reels for mbc news I was working for a guy named alan stiglitz I would go pick up the reels for mbc news And I would bring them across the bridge and that would give me 35 bucks already So I would start I would I was hustling like 150 to 200 cash And hash ways and then I would run home Make money selling coke going into the city for people

And then I would get in a delivery car and then my rides would usually be at one 2 30 in the morning 10 So I would just do open mics in between those yeah, and then at 10 I would go to your old triple in And sign in for open mics And go back there and do deliveries and before 4 a.m I would get up at night. That was the end of my night And I still remember Being on that bed with you many a night like

The nights I did take off It was because you were taking off And we would try to write jokes and I still remember the first joke we wrote together It was about speakers One of those good speakers that you are the ohms ohm speakers Something happened that the The fuck we wrote two jokes together. This is our first. It was the Puerto Rican day parade parade

It was I think a boat. I think a boat crashed in the huts into something. Yes. That was our first joke That helped me write The poor and how the Puerto Ricans used to Uh, we where we lived is the Hudson River out so The one side's in New York the other side's jersey But the Puerto Ricans and humans at the they used to picnic on the jersey side of the Hudson And this beach that was like a foot and a half long and they would go in the water like fucking crazy Like it was cleaner because it's on the jersey. They thought it was like fucking the the the

Right next to it. It was a giant pipe with this black sludge Coming out of it. I'm standing they would fucking float around like like We're not in the Bronx anymore. Yeah, it's not the jersey. Sure. It's a fucking two feet or 18 inches of fucking Black dirt sand. Oh, it's hilarious But the first two the first two jokes we wrote were about Puerto Rican Day Parade The Puerto Rican Navy crashed into the into the ship 400 Puerto Ricans in the Hudson. That's nothing new

That was the first joke And the second joke was about that the hell's angels were back One of those guys at John Gotti shot in the leg Remember they used to patrol the streets of new york with little red The whole the guardian angels were back And somebody put in the front page the guardian angels are back And we wrote a joke the guardian angels are back Time to put the bow speakers back on the windows or something like that. Those were our first two

successful writing jokes And I think that me staying with you those eight months like You and I could go hours about how we used to torture grandma How one night you put the fan in the window I was really hot. I was doing coke and you came in at two You're like, why are you sweating? I'm like, George, shut up. I don't want grandma to know And you're like, no, don't worry. I brought your sandwich. I brought your daily news And you went to put the fan in the window and the fan fell out of the window

And even though it was just oh my god and grandma came out the big box fans Like what the fuck is going on and we're like grandma, you know the deal here It's fucking play the win here every night, you know Grandma would had a big gong in the kitchen in the living room It was a big it was an Asian tabletop But it was like a giant gong. It was a giant fucking gong. It was hanging on the wall Yeah And fucking I would wait for grandma

To go to sleep and get comfy And I would see george tip topping To the room to go do a bump and as soon as the door would lock I would get up and hit the bong with everything I got and lay back in bed And grandma would come out and go what the fuck just happened and then she'd look and she'd go Where's george? I don't know. He's in the bathroom. That motherfucker. He's doing shit again And he'd run to the bathroom and that was the end of it George is

My you know the part of his charm coco is my grandma my grandmother was is from panamac So growing up, I didn't have any, you know, I grew up in cliffside. Not diverse was italian. That was it My my you know But as I became a younger younger adult my my two best friends were acutely Coco and then I had sammy medina Puerto rican whose father was the john goddy of the Puerto rican mom living in angerwood cliffs

sammy medina god bless him now. He's born again But he was crazy back then and those are my two my my my two buddies my You know, I didn't have there was nobody close side that was spanish And I never admitted I was spanish because they'd hear my grandmother talk and I just italian italian But it's uh, it's been a she loved him because she could talk spanish I would always talk spanish to your grandma your grandma Your grandma became my grandma was so important to her to be able to speak spanish because Again, she's she's in a white she lived at cliffside, too

There's no what there's no one to talk to other than huli on the phone but She loved you more, you know She she was always so proud man. I put a movie on And she'd be like that's not cocoa. I'm going that's fucking cocoa. And when I got the big screen tv, oh When she saw you she grandiated you just like my mom my mom You know, my mom used to go early days to go see it. I remember I'm hooking up with your mom in daos And her girlfriend. You know texas. She was living in plain old texas. She would come to see me at the daos

Yeah, that's an important George we got we went over our time limits, but uh, it's been a tremendous 41 years being your friend If anybody ever wants to know anything about me the truth This guy'll tell you this is why I brought him on because He knows my strengths my weaknesses What I love what I hate and he knows I love him we talk when we talk three times a day At least You know, listen, I gotta say I enjoyed the

Steven the velo and denis, you know the stuff that I didn't know the stuff that I you know I didn't know you when you were young so, you know fills in the blanks and uh Um what I want to want to know is He's real, you know, I see this fucking army and we went to we went to fucking uh Gotham theater that the first night had truly hit me that you were you were on to something bigger than just You know, you had a fucking army of people outside that Gotham theater We got out of the car We're blocking a half from the freaking club and people are walking up to you

And as we got there there was just like 250 strong Just chanting your name And uh, I was like, holy fuck. I mean I was stolen as a I was the original test tube ghost guy. He would ghost me way before you George was warming George and George. It was oh my god. I would go to these shows trying to sell t-shirts I didn't even know my name Yeah, he would bring merch. I'd be like dribbling on myself and you also got to know you'll be you became tiger Ralphie You became family

I mean we all go back with Ralphie the north berg and the hash ways To get the rice pudding, you know from Ralphie You go back with Gabriel my house. Coco was early comedy Ralphie would come pick him up driving to the airport I didn't watch last comedy stand. I had no fucking idea. No idea No, I just went pop out I didn't even know it was fat. I even said it was fat was in a you know big escalator something You know, I'd say hi. Hi. Are you doing and then when we became friends? It was uh, you know

As close as he was to cocoa. He treated me with every every Every bit of uh, because he knew my story You know, he knew my story And uh, that's one guy, you know Truly miss truly truly miss all these people that sometimes You don't really have to come out of your mom's womb to have a brother Absolutely. You've been shown that and I've been shown that gift You know, you you were my my big you're still my big brother. I mean, we're 11 months apart, but

you know, uh You know, we think alike, you know, you give me advice. I don't listen to it You get fucking mad a couple times you went a few months where you know, you put me on knockoff Because you love me and because you you know, you see I do so, you know, I think with my heart and on my brain sometimes so Uh, we love each other, brother. I always have me first. You always have me from my daughters My ex-wife loves you my daughters. Every, you know You're just good to everybody. You know what I mean? You guys are all I got Worked you too. You're fucked. No, I'm a cock sucker too. But you know what man?

You're all I got it's uh, it's been a 40 year People usually don't have fucking nothing for 40 years I've had a brother for 40 years And to make it official. Let's just say 35 fucking years So I love that you took the time To come on and just share a few stories To let these motherfuckers know We weren't fucking around. This is real. It was a different time

And what dennis said loyalty I'll I'll give my right arm for you. I don't give a fuck at this point. You always have we and I I give what I got and that's what we do. We don't always have what we got we share because we love each other And uh, you know, no one's prouder of you Nobody man. Nobody's proud Nobody's prouder you than me brother When I'm in a fucking I'm in quarantine here and I can count on my hands how many people check up You know, and you'd be surprised

When you know, I'm divorced my kid is not that far. I see her but I go to bed alone every night And the people that I talk to It's really important because uh You know, it's the people I care about so You're number one in my book always and you're number one in my book I love that fucking film of my grandmother Lee. All right. We'll get it out to you Thank you for doing too far. Thank you for doing the whole week I love them. No, I love your brother. Have a good one

You too We're back you dirty bitches I want to thank george again for laying it down. Listen Like I tell you I got a thousand stories. I can tell you but ten thousand. I can't tell you We covered what we could today. I just want to open My world up to you guys to see how lucky I've been As a human being that listen guys These guys weren't my friends

When I was at the comedy store These guys weren't my friends when I was on the set of the long the shard These guys weren't my friends When you know I was on the set of the Sopranos These guys were my friends when people were calling me a speck when people call me a thief And when people were not saying nice things about me and I didn't deserve for them to say nice things about me But at the same time these guys were my friends when there was nothing there

And they're the friends that matter in your fucking life. Believe it or not, you know what I'm saying I learned this I see this every day I know who's my friend because of movies And I know and I know the people I'll take a bullet off They'll take a bullet for me and that's a very great thing to have in your life Knowing I see the differences. These are my childhood friends, you know, so I'm fortunate enough that they'll do me the favor and do these things They're not movie stars

They're not fucking rock stars. They're not fucking models They're just blue collar people exactly that I am Exactly what you are. What's up, Lee? I don't I this is a new because I think a lot of people during this time are reaching out to people and it is nice But you you've been doing this for years But how like how does it make you feel when you talk to one of these people? Like how do you feel after a conversation like 40 minutes with one of your friends from back then on the phone? every day, yeah

As soon as I get off the phone, I always ask myself I can't believe I still talk to them And I'll think of uh, and I I do it every day. There's always somebody Conti Duffy I'm still supposed to call Abe, you know My other friend James Divo a lot of people have asked me to put Divo on I got to call him and ask him to feel come on. But how does it make me feel?

Like a rich man Like a lot of people think having money makes you feel good and all this shit I know a ton of people that have tons of money And they don't have the relationships I have with my friends to where I do And they were and then you got to remember like George has been there, you know, George Ran away at two open mics Like he went to two. Oh, he said it

He left me at two open mics. He left me at one and 127th street You know, that's how long I've known George, you know Steve Avillo, I didn't see in the beginning of comedy But he knew what I was doing And Dennis knew what I was doing, you know, and when I put Joey Fulato on his cousin was there A lot of people remember, you know, Mike Astley's Divo who we're talking about A lot of people he turned me on to David Letterman And I would go to his house every night and watch David Letterman watch all the comedians on David Letterman

So these are the people that have been there with me since day one I feel great. I feel great that I still have the ability to talk to them They also know all the bad things I did and they talked to me Because they know the reasons why I did them And it's forgiven. It's a known it's forgiven. It's done It doesn't matter. It's not where you start the journey. It's where you ended You know what a blotty is have a lot of friends That were way ahead of you

Went to college got married got houses You felt insecure and all of a sudden they discovered crack You had already done crack when you were 13 You moved on with your life and all of a sudden here they are Living at a bus station And here you are you own a house now because it's not really where you start It's where you fucking end And that's the lesson for this motherfucking week. Don't forget

Tonight UFC bitches my bookie Dot ag What's the code joey, right joey? I'm just listening. It's not about fucking money I'm just helping you motherfuckers out so you can make some cash tonight My bookie dot ag joey make a little money. You got something to watch tonight How good is that you got something to watch on a wednesday night? Jesus christ You would try watching tv at night Listen, I get so fucking depressed at night. I don't even go into the tv room

Like this times I go into the tv room and the tv is off and my wife is reading a fucking book That's how like we we gave up on the tv I didn't watch Ozarks. I didn't watch exotic joe I don't want to watch none of that shit. I don't I don't really want to get involved I wanted to see who the fuck I was for the first time In a long time. I got to have a long talk with myself What was the last time you had a long talk with yourself? I had one this weekend See where you end up. You know what I'm saying? You need to have a long talk with yourself

The unemployment check hasn't come the landlord keeps throwing daggers at you You know, I'm saying he's about to light the building on fire Because you and your two other buddies haven't paid the rent, but you don't give a fuck. There's no debt is prison Take care of your health Take care of your mind Take care of your body and I promise you this will pass. I don't give a fuck How many times they extend it? I don't give a fuck We're gonna make it through this. All right

I love you mother fuckers with all my heart, but real quick I got a couple of things I got to talk to you about number one You got to shave your nuts. All right. I'm sick and fucking just because it's depressionville And just because you're not gonna see a chick don't mean you're gonna leave your bush down there To grow untame and you dick to smell like a fucking joe exotic whatever his fucking name is Right now right now is the time to wash your balls. You know, it's number one cure of depression washing your balls If you were young, I'm so depressed I can't masturbate take that fucking bongo dick out and tell mama to show you titties

And bang one out. That's what gets you fucking undepressed. You fucking piece of shit People get depressed get depressed because it's a yes, it's a disease and it's a whatever But you let yourself slide into that you see yourself sliding into that getting the shower Getting the car go for a walk talk to people number one shave your balls I find that to be the number one cure for depression shaving your fucking nutsack And i'm no psychiatrist, but I tell you but think about it Even if you're a woman you're depressed. You're like, I haven't gotten cocky in a year. Well start by looking at your pussy You know what? I forgot. I got a nice looking little pussy. Well, you too guys

You got a nice looking little dick, but you got a shave around that needs some fucking trimming and right now Manscaped is the time to do it if you're gonna trim your balls. What do you got? You got no baseball. You got no basketball. You got the u.s.c. Tonight's a perfect night to shave your nuts in between rounds Well, just take your dick out with the man right there and you pick up on that Then you spit some revive around those fucking things and slap them around Remember when you were a kid the fucking barber would put like alcohol on your neck After he fucking shaved don't do that no more because there's a bunch of fucking jerks

But after you shave your nuts you get like The reviving you fucking take your nutsack and you squeeze them Let them fill in there and squeeze remember that little The little ball you used to have at the end of your bicycle like that put some of that on there And the fucking crop preserver and that's what you get with the perfect package listen I'm gonna tell you again Fucking a little more 3.0 is the best razor system You're gonna ever own in your life and it's waterproof

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What are you a fancy suit for charlie if you got no job to wear at the same thing applies listen Remember when your dick used to get hard remember? When you would just be fucking watching like sport center And you'd be watching leslie visso, whatever her name was with a little redhead dude And you know, she doesn't throw a good blow job. Are you looking at her going? Fuck it. I would like the leslie to suck my dick right now It's 1108. She's talking about basketball. Fuck it

But now you can't do that. You know why because you don't have confidence in yourself because you got a weak wood I got the same problem What am I gonna waste this game? I got I got game I got game bitches, but I can't be wasting it Because I can't give you the dick. I can't cover the spread like I used to but I'm 24 but now I can thank god the blue chew Fucking tremendous. It's the first chewable Dick pill which means it works fast. All right. What do you mean joey fast fast?

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Hit that blue chew dog Thank you. Thank you for listening. Thank you for george Thank you for uh manscaped. I want to thank my bookie. Don't forget tonight My bookie's gonna make you some money. You got to share Uh to share against fucking anthony. Yeah I forget. I don't know the whole fucking lineup. I'm telling you I'm confused with three times four

I'm doing this homo schooling. It's throwing me all off Dates. I don't got none. You're getting your money back from live nations for fucking dallas and uh Whatever take it all back guys right now. We're gonna start from scratch Hopefully when the improv opens up in brayer, I'll be doing my bi weekly tuesday night show Getting my chops back and you guys will be a part of it until then stay in stay safe Don't let nobody breathe on you. Don't let nobody fuck with you

And uh, I love you. Have a great weekend. See you monday morning tip top mother fucking magoo You