Unsubscribe Podcast - 167 - Superman Vs Homelander ft. Dean Cain | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 167

Episode Date: July 15, 2024

The legendary Dean Cain is here to talk playing Superman, acting with Denzel and fatherhood! Watch this episode ad-free and uncensored on Pepperbox! https://www.pepperbox.tv/ WATCH THE AFTERSHOW ON PATREON! https://www.patreon.com/UnsubscribePodcast FREE TO USE MEDIA: (please tag/credit us when you post!) https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1uppmQHMGf8uI2OuOatp932e3S2VGy0PE ------------------------------ THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS! RAYCON Go to https://BUYRAYCON.COM/unsub TODAY to get 15% off your Raycon order, plus free shipping! FUM For a limited time, use code UNSUB to get a free gift with your Journey Pack! Head to https://tryfum.com and use code UNSUB. MANSCAPED Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with code UNSUB at https://manscaped.com SHOPIFY Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/unsubpod ------------------------------ FOLLOW DEAN! https://twitter.com/RealDeanCain https://www.instagram.com/deuces1966 BUY US A DRINK! https://paypal.me/UnsubscribePodcast UNSUB MERCH: https://www.bunkerbranding.com/pages/unsubscribe-podcast CHECK OUT: https://outofregz.com/ CODE: UNSUB ------------------------------ FOLLOW THE HOSTS: Eli_Doubletap https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://www.twitch.tv/Eli_Doubletap https://x.com/Eli_Doubletap https://www.youtube.com/c/EliDoubletap Brandon Herrera https://www.youtube.com/@BrandonHerrera https://x.com/TheAKGuy https://www.instagram.com/realbrandonherrera Donut Operator https://www.youtube.com/@DonutOperator https://x.com/DonutOperator https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator The Fat Electrician https://www.youtube.com/@the_fat_electrician https://thefatelectrician.com/ https://www.instagram.com/the_fat_electrician https://www.tiktok.com/@the_fat_electrician ------------------------------ unsubscribe pod podcast episode ep unsub funny comedy military army comedian texas podcasts #podcast #comedy #funnypodcast #military history Chapters: 0:00 Welcome To Unsub! 7:26 Meet Our Guest! 16:56 Dean’s Harvey Weinstein Story 19:22 Alex Jones 20:43 Dean Interviewed Fauci 21:37 AD 22:45 Lois & Clark 27:05 Cats Will Eat You 28:36 Dark Humor Is Important 31:18 Donald Trump 34:13 Politicians Are The Worst 39:44 Princeton 40:15 Billionaires 42:20 American Politics & Brandon’s Campaign 49:24 AD 50:29 The Offenders 52:36 Homelander Vs Superman 59:28 Christopher Walken 1:03:47 Trailer Parks 1:08:08 AD 1:09:42 North Korea 1:13:13 The Offenders 1:17:49 Mad Max & Furiosa 1:18:51 Tom Hardy & Jiu Jitsu 1:26:43 AD 1:27:58 Lois & Clark & Writing Scripts 1:33:24 John’s Book & Dean’s Son 1:38:03 ComicCon 1:42:20 Crazy Fans 1:43:34 Fatherhood 1:56:35 Denzel Washington Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I could maybe kill you. This is awesome. We're going to hell. Can I have my wheelchair? This is my **** right here. I wish you had a stronger Japanese accent. Superman would have been way cooler. Spoken like a true racist.

Thank you. Thank you very much. Oh yeah, we gotta start the fucking mango. Mango. Doing it. Everyone? We doing it? Get a can? What flavor you wanna drink? I mean, I have Rubyy grapefruit, but it's going to be mango.

We all clack it off at the same time. Yeah, we're going to count it down from three, two, one. And then we're going to try to win? No, no, no. What are we doing here? You just have to pick a sip. You can down it if you'd like. Okay, I didn't know what the fuck.

No, we're just popping it for sale. I like how fucking in it to win it you are, man. Three, two, one. And then drink it as fast as you can. Just get him shit right. You've seen that video of that kid who's like, yeah, could you drink a soda without burping? He's just precocious, you know, 17-year-old kid. And he thinks it's all cool and he's

turns around and he burps and he runs and runs in the garage and knocks him down you see this thing it is that sounds like a vine amazing it's definitely a vine it's well yeah it probably was but but he torched it hi everyone welcome to the unsubscribed Podcast. I am joined today by Eli Doubletap, the amazing Dean Cain. Oh, yes. Brandon Herrera and myself, Donut Operator. Thank you for joining us today for these shenanigans. Hi, everyone. Hi, everyone. Glad to finally have you on, man.

I'm psyched to be here. No, you're not. You didn't even know we opened the cans first. I didn't know that. I didn't say watch. I'm so excited to be on the show. I just said I'm excited to be here. I didn't know that. I didn't say watch. I just said I'm excited to be here. I'm excited to be here. Listen, I am excited to be here because I don't normally come halfway across the country to sit down

with some folks and do a podcast. So I'm fans and I'm happy to be here. I'd love to go shooting. I got to go out to the range tomorrow. I got to go to Comic-Con. I got to go out to the range tomorrow. I got to go to Comic-Con. I got to work. Tomorrow?

Well, there's one today, but I'd rather be here. And I'll be there Friday and then Saturday. And then I fly out. My heart, my soul. His heart grew three sizes. 10.30. That ain't happening. Really early.

And then my buddy's coming down. Mr. Foster's coming down from Austin, which is basically California. And he's going to come down. He's my roommate from college. One of my best friends in the world. So we're going to hang out tomorrow night for a little bit. And that's it. I don't have time to go run around and do that, which bums me out because I'd love to. I wanted to come out to your range

day a couple times. You got close. You guys shot up a bunch of cool stuff. Oh, yeah. Shot a car. Yeah, well, we have vendors bring out like – I wanted to shoot a car. So Brandon has one of the rarest machine gun collections in Texas, and we also have vendors come out. And last time they brought many guns out, dude.

We were just able to – like all sorts of stuff. It was awesome. First time we shot a way too expensive Hummer, the H1. We were all just like, could we just like get a replacement, like little surplus hummer that's like 10 grand and swap it out they're like no you need to shoot the expensive one yeah it was a mobile game company you know the microtransactions apparently pay out a lot and they're like no shoot this expensive hummer it's dude it still ran they like drove it there

it ran after you shot it up no no no before it got there it was like a hundred and ten thousand dollar vehicle we're just like no we don't want to can i just pay you 10 grand and like cut to like a little mini one and you guys are and it blows up didn't seem right when you guys what that huh fuck. My brain just like literally turned off what I was about to say. No, no, you're doing great. It's good. No, it's gone. It was like, Eli, say this.

Hamster died. It just fell off the wheels. Like, no. Hammy, come back. It's gone. My dad killed it. Yeah. He fucking just slapped it against the wall.

No, Junkyard Diggs. That's the one. Junkyard Diggs. That's the one. Junkyard Diggs got it running again, though. Which was wild. Yeah, this is after 50,000. I don't know how many rounds hit that. Was anybody shooting for the engine block, though?

Was anybody shooting? With AP-50. Yeah. That's a yes. Okay. But it was sideways, right? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

But still, it got. Not that I want to be on the other side of it trying to hide, but that wouldn't work. No, vehicles are concealment, not, or cover, not concealment. Concealment, not cover. Yeah. Words are hard. See? His hamster's dead, too.

Yeah. Dude, my hamster died a long time ago. My hamster died 10 white claws ago today. And then there were two. Your hamster's drunk. You want to just pass out? Okay. You got to handle this.

Yeah, it's all you. Go. Now you have to come to the next range day. I'd love to. Go shoot. That'd be awesome. They do a fantastic job putting that fucking crazy event together. It's one of those times where you're just like.

You get everybody out there, too. I saw almost anyone who is everyone no it's everyone who is anyone people who can get away from like and then there was one yeah exactly that's just you all right good job brandon but yeah man we got we got a lot of cool people out to the last two range days because we only had like two big official ones, and it was really cool. The one we had, we had Bill Goldberg come out, Undertaker, like all those guys. It was so cool. Goldberg's a big dude.

He's awesome. He lives here with us, man. He's got his ranch out here, right? Yeah, his ranch is out here. He's a badass. I love him. As another former professional football player, he was. He played, I think, for the Rams, right?

Didn't he play for the Rams? He played for Atlanta, didn't he? Atlanta? Yeah. Wait, who did he play for? I know he did, but he was a football player, like a through and through football player. And I played for Buffalo for like five minutes.

You played for the Nightmare Brick. Did you? See, I'm fucking... Sports are my weakness. You got shot, man. It's all right. I was bad at my job. That's all that means.

The Atlanta Falcons. The Falcons? The Fal all that means. The Atlanta Falcons. The Falcons? Yeah, Atlanta Falcons. All right, you win. See, now he wins. I got nothing. The gerbil got back on. His hamster's back.

But he was a stud, man. He was a stud. Dude, he is. He is a stud. We had, he showed us that footage of not seeing footage of him wrestling because he used to wear spandex pants and do a flip right there was those weird things he's like yeah this is old goberg before wcw he's like yeah this is before i blew up and the the circuit he was running he had like pants on he would do a

backflip it was weird seeing him like that also 280 pound man doing backflips. It was just a solid brick of trend. That guy was huge. That was a scary human. He still is. For who he is now, for his age and everything, he's still a crazy jacked guy. Yeah, he's a stud. Way back in the day, he was just 350 pounds of muscle. That's an intimidating human.

And now he's still pushing 200 and something at 58. I forget how old. I'm 58, man. So he's 50. He's your age. That ain't old. Shut up. Shut the fuck up, man.

Shut up. Sorry. I'm right here. I know he's right around the corner, but he's not here. He just walks around. He's just the happiest, nicest dude that you will ever meet. He's done a good job in life. Bless him. And now you're out here doing the fucking, well, you will ever meet. He's done a good job in life. Bless him.

And now you're out here doing the fucking, well, you had your run. Introduce yourself for everyone that doesn't know. You used to do, I used to dance on film. Yeah. For money. Stripped a little, I started a show called Magic Mike in the early 1800s. It picked up. It picked up. It picked up.

No, I mean, so as far as my short version of my resume, my life. Well, see, the thing is you didn't know I played in the NFL. No, I didn't. See, there it is. I grew up in Malibu, California. I grew up with Chris Penn, Sean Penn, Rob Lowe, Charlie Sheen, Emilio Estevez, all those kids. My dad was a director.

He directed all those guys in, like, Young Guns. No shit. Yes, my dad's a Emilio Estevez, all those kids. My dad was a director. He directed all those guys in like young guns. No shit. Yes. My dad's a cowboy from South Dakota. I'm adopted by him, biological mother. And then I was raised in, I was born in Michigan on a military base, Selfridge Air Force Base. My grandfather was a commander in the Navy. And he was, my mom left my biological father two days before I was born, jumped on a bus, then on a train.

I could have been born on a train like in Tennessee or in a bus stop. I thought that was kind of cool. But I ended up in a military hospital in Detroit. And then my mom decided to move out to California with two boys at the age of 23 to become an actress. Really smart. No money. two boys at the age of 23 to become an actress really smart no money and uh met my my dad who adopted me who ended up moving us to malibu california and a little trailer park we grew up but it was idyllic and all these guys were in the film industry i wanted to play football go to

school and so i did all that and then before just before my senior year of high school i went and did a movie with my dad and Robert Duvall started called, called, uh, the stone boy. And I got killed in that movie early on. And I just did it cause my dad said, you look like the kid.

And then, um, I finished my senior year of high school and, uh, I got a lot of options to go play football. So I got a bunch of scholarship opportunities, but I'm sure you fucking killed it in high school. Like,

Oh yeah, he's the pro football player That was in movies In high school I wasn't quite there yet Obviously But college I was in college and I chose Princeton Instead of going to these football schools

Because I wanted to go to what I thought was the best school In the world I was a good football player But I did well in school The hardest thing about Princeton is getting in. Yeah. And once you're in, if you fail out, you're screwed up. Really, that's it.

But I had to adjust tremendously because I remember my first exam, I got an 86. I was like, kiss my ass, 86. And they're like, yeah, it's a C plus, Mr. Cain. I was like, what? It's not a C plus. It's an 86. It's a solid B. Yeah.

They're looking at an A. And they're like, no, you didn't do any of the extra credit stuff. And we graded on a curve here. I was like, what? There was extra credit? Grading negative on a curve. Holy shit. That's what they used to do. I don't know what they do now, but stuff's going crazy insane.

Nowadays, they whip out a paint swatch like, Mr. Kane, I don't think you did score high enough. But I'm Japanese. That's the thing. It's also funny. My given name is Tanaka. I'm Japanese. I'm English, Irish, and Japanese. I wish you had a stronger Japanese accent. Superman would have been way cooler.

Holy shit, you're Royce Ray! I could have played it that way. Superman versus Godzilla. It's a good thing, though. That's the truth. It's a brain. No, it's Superman. Shit.

You do a better job of it than I do. Holy crap. But when I got the job of Superman, the internet was in its infancy. I know it's hard to believe for you youngins here, but 93 is when I started playing Superman and then somebody was like, we want Superman, not Sushi Man. Wait, for real?

Holy fuck, the internet was still racist back then? Yes, it was. But the thing was, I thought that was the funniest shit I'd ever heard. My brother still reminds me of it because he thinks it's hysterical. His nickname for me is Wang, even though it's a Chinese of it because he thinks it's hysterical he calls me his his nickname for me is Wang even though it's a Chinese name because he thinks I look more Asian than he does and I call him Juan Valdez because he looks more Mexican than I do and I speak fluent Spanish so it's just jacked up but with the racist jokes are supposed to happen like my best friend's

black and you should hear what we said and my other great friend is Iranian if you listen to us speak to each other you'd think we hated each other. But that's how it's supposed to be. Chase, just bleep out that entire segment. So he sounds really racist. You should hear us. I've been called... I've played gay in two movies.

I've kissed a man. Dude. You know what was weird about that? Kissing a man? Yeah. I kissed a man. And we tried to fake it at first because he was straight and I was straight. I was.

I am. I am straight. So I had to kiss him. This is like the fucking scene from The Dictator or The Interview where we're just all just like, Eminem's gay? Yeah. Wait, we'll go back to that bit. Hold on.

That movie was so good. I kissed a man. No. Yeah. And we were trying to fake it. to that. Hold on. That movie was so good. I kissed a man. No, and we were trying to fake it. And the director, Greg Berlanti, who's like king of all, like he did Supergirl,

DC Legends of Tomorrow, all that whole, all the CW thing. He's like, he had actually in the Guinness Book of World Records for having the most shows on, greatest guy in the world. But it's his story, and he was directing this. And he's like, I know you guys are uncomfortable trying to fake this we're trying to fake it and he's like just it's not working so just could you guys just just kiss for a second and do a thing i'll say here we go let's do it and then the kid had the softest lips it was just weird i didn't

expect it i picture you pulling away like wow no it was music. There's music playing. All of a sudden, you got rehearsals. Can we block this? All I want to say is this. He's never called me. And I'm upset a little bit. How much did you get paid for that role? Almost nothing. We all did it because we loved the project.

Honest truth. And there were great people in it. It was a lovely project. What was this for? It's a movie called The Broken Hearts Club. OK. It's a good film. You should see it. I i kiss a man did i say that already yeah that's always one of those things it was like oh i was but i mean i was like oh god it's one of those things i was like we got

i'm an actor and i don't know and he's like just go ahead just told me that you read the script and said oh i'll do that for free yeah well'm an actor. I'm method acting. If you want to parse my words, I did say exactly that. Trust me, I've been in politics. I know how that works. You have to do it in politics. I honestly thought you were going to win, and I was very

disappointed that you did not. Or haven't yet won. Well, it depends on what happens in the next year and a half really i'll be so mad if brandon wins this end post oh my god he'll be mad cody will be it's like i always said it was like a double-sided coin it was it was like the way that i compared it uh was it's like exercise and ice cream ice cream is like okay well if i lose i go back to this baller ass life that i have i get to do whatever the fuck i want to make a lot of money i do all this sort of stuff but i

know it's kind of like a little hollow and then exercise which is you know i'll lose a lot of that stuff and i'll lose a lot of that ability but i know it's better for me in the long run it's better for the country so it's like okay well either way i win in some degree but it's like how much are you willing to sacrifice i was willing to do the job but it's like, how much are you willing to sacrifice? I was willing to do the job, but it's like, again, exercise, ice cream. And it just so happened I landed on ice cream. So I need to be back to doing this. Perhaps. Maybe.

Perhaps. We shall see. We shall see. Listen, I'd love to see it happen. Going back to kissing dudes. Yeah. Hold on. I feel like we breezed past that a little quickly.

That is one thing. It would be the script-wise. I'd have to have a number of like, okay, this has to be a really fucking good script if I'm kissing my boys. Or you have to have six more of these. You don't kiss your boys goodnight. But that's kissing goodnight. That's just friendship kisses.

Connor knows. You don't kiss your boys goodnight? I don't kiss the boys goodnight. There we go. I kiss my son all the time. That's just friends. Friendship kisses. Connor knows. You don't kiss your boys goodnight? Always kiss the boys goodnight. There we go. I kiss my son all the time. He's 24. My son's 24. I kiss him all the time.

It reminds me of the fucking Ricky Gervais show, Afterlife, where he's talking to his father who's got dementia in a nursing home. He's like, I love you, Dad. Gay. Gervais is brilliant. He's hilarious. He doesn't give a shit. I love it. Anybody who's willing to call out Epstein

and all that is very funny. He did the whole thing when he was hosting the Golden Globes. He called out Weinstein. He's like, you guys worked for him. You did it. He's like, you're friends

with him. Oh, shut up. You all knew him. I knew him, but I didn't ever work for him. Did he have that reputation in the industry already? Oh, hell yes. Even from where you were at at the time? Yeah.

I mean, I talked to him. There was a number of movies I was up for and I ended up not getting and this and that. But I'm also not – like when I was a kid and I grew up with all these kids, drugs, like they wouldn't – I was known as an athlete and as a good student. But I was – I'd run around, have some fun, whatever. But no drugs were ever around me. Like there were never drugs around me. Like I don't like it. It wouldn't go over well.

At the same time, people knew, and they knew my father, and they knew just don't do that shit around Dean. He won't stand for it. And I'm a grown man. I had an incident with the wine scene. I'd never told this story before, but I'll tell it here. I was in Cannes at the Cannes Film Festival, and I was on a yacht, and I was staying on that yacht.

It was a big party, and a friend of mine had just bought Miramax from the wine scenes, the whole thing. Jesus. We're on this yacht. I'm staying on this thing. It's a big-ass purchase, and it's a beautiful yacht. Different make and count. Big party. Wine scenes on the boat.

Everyone's on the boat. It's a huge party on the boat. It's like three, four levels. I was at the bar in this middle level, and this one girl girl this polish girl was dancing and she was smoking hot and i was like wow that girl is the the queen of the ball so to speak and i saw her and i she looked at her i smiled smiled okay i was like man i don't who knows whatever who knows what the deal is and so then she handed you her ninth grade report card and she was not even a good student which is crazy no he was no she was of age she was of age but um which makes her a rarity in hollywood like it's true but i saw i

saw her whatever and then i you know whatever the party goes on and then a little bit later in the party now and people are getting a little bit loose things are going on i see her come up like the back stairway which is about as far as over to the kitchen window which is like what 20 yards whatever 15 yards and i see her come up and like somebody like pulling her from back from below and i started like to pull her arm out and look over and see me and she goes and like bolts over to me i was like sweet she's coming over and then i she comes to beelines over to me and she's like hey and i was like hey and then i see from the back who it was that pulled her head comes over it was harvey weinstein he looks over at me he goes like this and walked away fuck and that is the god's honest truth because if he'd come over and like he called

her like 75 times that night too like he she's like here it is again here it is i was like wow but also like if if if and that's why she's not in hunger games that is 100 why she's like here it is again here it is i was like wow but also like if if if and that's why she's not in hunger games that is 100 why she's not in hunger games no doubt about that that's true it's it's it's a joke but it's honestly like it's disgusting how not joking it is no no it's it's it's 100 true um beautiful girl and she's done very well for her but oh yeah oh yeah there's a lot of the folks in hollywood who do it just because they can get you're not gonna have a shot at a girl like that he's not gonna have a shot at a woman like that you know um unless of course he holds

all the power and that thing that's why he's in jail even though it got turned over in new york wait did it just new york there yeah they turned okay i was like what yeah well ox jones had a bad opinion about something and now he got sued for $1.5 billion or whatever the fuck it is. I still don't understand that. If you call Alex Jones, if you say he's an asshole or you say that he's got bad opinions, sure, whatever, you're entitled to that.

But to be able to sue him for what he said to the tune of $1.5 billion, it's like... Those were the memes that made... It was absolutely crazy seeing it's like and again you can think like alex jones fucking whatever wait that like all that stuff and i don't feel like aoc is particularly smart but i don't think she's gonna get sued for 100 1.5 billion for some of the shit she says no and then you have hey this

is the individual that started the war in ira Hey, this is the individuals that did this. They barely went to jail or a lawsuit of a million to $100,000. And you're like, this? Starting a whole ass war? Well, it's like the stickers. It's like the politicians who allowed grandmothers during COVID to die sad, afraid, and alone are still in office. Except for Andrew Cuomo. Wow.

But he just had that shit. afraid and alone are still in office except for andrew cuomo well sorry i have a little head cold but my doctor fauci said i'd be fine if i came here and sat real close with you guys and drive through your face it's okay i i've seen him by the way what way back in february of 2020 i was co-hosting fox and friends and i interviewed him and i remember he said and i asked them to give me that find that interview for me because i want to because i said that so you're basically saying this is going to be like the flu it's no big deal he was saying no mask no anything at that point yeah no i remember that because i remember very early on he was his big thing was like oh oh, well, cloth masks really don't do anything. And then like a month later, they did a complete turnaround.

They're like, oh, that's vital. Everybody needs it for the spirit of compliance or whatever the fuck they said. And then it was more distance related. Then six feet. 6.6 feet. That has to be the exact number. It's just bullshit. It was bullshit all the way around. Japan was like, man, we just do this anyway, so. That's true. are you picking on me because i'm japanese yes okay

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to get a free gift with your journey pack. Head to tryfume.com. That's T-R-Y-F-U-M.com with code UNSUB. Or scan the QR code on screen right now to get a free gift with your order today. That's how I grew up watching, like, you know, Godzilla. I mean, that was it, man. That was the best. And do you remember Giant Robot?

No, you're too young. Giant Robot. I don't remember Giant Robot. Yeah, you guys are too young. Damn it. Sorry, I grew up with Lois and Clark. There we go. I know Hercules and Kevin Sorbo. That's what I grew up on. Kevin Sorbo, good buddy of mine.

Guess who the number two person, there was two of us who went to network for Superman. It was me and Kevin Sorbo. You got it over him. Yeah, I heard his audition too. Kevin, I think you played it a little angry. So, a little more angry. But, you know, I was like, he's blonde hair. You can't get it.

He's blonde. And you nailed it. I remember as Cody saying, it he's blonde and you nailed it i remember as cody saying it's growing up and it's still in my time frame of watching it at my aunt was a super huge fan of you watching it in that small ass apartment like oh we i think we talked about it too we didn't have cable but we could always watch that on like wb13 or like some of the free channels that you would get over you the antenna and it was it was fucking xena it was it was lozen clark and it was uh hercules and they were back to back to back and it's like this is my shit right here i'm nine years old like yes

go heat up wait don't you wait you were nine fuck ish sorry nine no such a great listen i love doing that job it was amazing it's too much work by the way it's 18 hours a day minimum every day for sure really that's why that's why i won't do another series no shit it's a lot of work and then out the gate you probably didn't what season did you actually start getting paid a little bit better than the i renegotiated after the first season first season the amount of money i made i didn didn't even want to talk about it. Dude, it's trash. I was just so happy to have a job. I could pay my rent. I was like, this is awesome. And then I realized what it was like. Because back then, there was three networks.

ABC, NBC, CBS. That was it. The CW hadn't even come in. The Fox hadn't done anything. And before you test at network, you have to sign your contract. So you have to know how much money is on the line now. And that's great. This much money is on the line. Don't fuck it up. It's like, oh my God. When I got the job,

then I was like, all right, I got the job. But then I was like, holy shit, I got the job. It's almost like if I ran for Congress and then got, oh wait, and then you get the job. Holy shit. It felt like that. I was like, I don't know what, I don't know how, will they like me? Will anybody

believe that I can play this character? Are they going to hate me? Who knows? I was terrified. Will they accept a Japanese Superman? I might not see him. Sushi Man. Sushi Man.

This is where I'm starting to wonder, like, man, I am way less racist than I thought. I had no idea that you were any sort of Asian descent. Oh, yeah. Well, of course. I think they're Mexican. I've played Mexican. I've played Mexican. I played Hawaiian.

I played Italian. I played a racist. You made a career off of, what is that? Ambiguity. Ambiguity, that's it. What is it? Cultural appropriation. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's really, they should change that second word to appreciation. Because that's what it is. Spoken like a true racist. Thank you. Thank you very much. So the funny thing is, when all that was happening, if somebody's like,

call me, he's a white supremacist, his given name is Tanaka. It's tattooed on my ankle right there. That's Tanaka. That looks like a basket of dreidel That says Tanaka, right? Yeah. Okay, thanks. That looks like a basket of dreidel. It is a basket of dreidel. Yeah.

They're like, you know, somebody's going, he's a racist. Look at him. He says this. I'm like, what? And somebody's like, hey, you know, his given name is Tanaka. He's Japanese. He's like, what? Oh, he just whitewashed that so he could go to high school. I got adopted, you assholes. It wasn't like I changed it at four years old myself.

I don't want to be known as a Japanese man, so I'll hide that. Very proud of it. And it's just crazy the things people say. It's insane. I love it. It's insane. Just you being, just hating on you. Like he changed his name on purpose.

Like, man. Yeah, I changed it because I was terrified of Tanaka. That's why I tattooed it on my ankle. So when you got into like Superman, your first season, you was like, man. Yeah, I changed it because I was terrified of Tanaka. That's why I tattooed it on my ankle. So when you got into Superman in your first season, you're like, okay, the pay is shit. Lots of work, but then you're like, okay. But it was more than I'd ever made, by the way, ever. How old were you at the time?

26 when I got the job. 27 when it aired. That's awesome. I didn't have a kid. I don't even think I had a dog at the time. I love dogs. I'm a dog guy. I'm not have a kid. I didn't have – I don't even think I had a dog at the time. And I love dogs. I'm a dog guy. I'm not a cat guy.

I'm allergic to cats, and they will eat you if you die. I think cats look at you, and they're like, I could maybe kill you. Yeah, dude, they eat your eyeballs first too. They're soft and easy to get in there. Yeah. Spoken from a man with cats. I think they want to kill you. I've seen it, dude. Do you think I haven't shown up to a house before where like grandma died? Oh, that's right. Yeah. Grandma was a cat person and the cats don't have food and it's sweltering

fucking 98 degrees outside. And you go in there and you smell it right away. I know what I'm about to see right now. And the cats ate her eyeballs and her tongues. And the cats fucking died in the house because no one's feeding them. They already ate grandma. It's really fun. Beautiful. Yeah, it's great. It's really awesome to watch the audience wince at this story. We'll be right back after these messages. Meanwhile, we're all just like

Jamie, put it up. Jamie, show grandma soup. Grandma soup's the best. Grandma Soup is awesome. When they don't pay the power bill for so long, the air conditioning cuts off. There's like 10 dead cats and then Grandma Soup. It's so awesome.

Grandmothers, they are a leaky people. Especially when they're fucking dead. Just air that place out. That's what you should be able to watch on Saturday Live, but you can't. Can't see that. What SNL skit is that? It should be.

It's just dead women. There it is again. Huber is supposed to be dark. Listen, you know it. Military and police officers. I'm actually currently sworn deputy sheriff in Frederick County, Virginia. And a reserve

police officer in Pocatello, Idaho. And I like that out there. Idaho's great. Yeah, so they have to have that dark humor because the shit that they see is awful. Oh yeah, you wouldn't be able to survive without Gallo's humor. You have to have it.

You have to have it. It'd be weird not's i just fucking mind-blowing when people get offended by dark humor i thankfully you can't joke about that it's like well that's what you've seen it joke about exactly yeah i'm gonna joke about baby lasagna and spaghetti till the day that i die when a baby gets drug under a car because otherwise otherwise you're just going to head off. Yeah. It's going to get to you and you're going to be upset and you're going to do the sewer slides. I hope I chase,

if you can just put a really bad laugh track when he says that. Legitimately. legitimately that's how you identify somebody who's never experienced jack shit in their life is if they get offended over like that because they're getting offended for people who would think it's hilarious yeah 100 but soldiers get that all the time like in war like you can't joke about veteran sewer slide or anything like that. It's like, oh, we can't. And we're going to. You have to. Yeah.

It's part of life. It's that or just eat yourself up on dumb shit that I don't, I wouldn't hang out with anyone like that. Thank God I don't. It's like Jester's privilege too. It's like, you know, you're able to say whatever you want under the guise of comedy, but you're also able to use that and talk about real things. It's like the jester is the only one who can talk about the king negatively. Oh yeah, very true. Like something like that.

Be a thin line though back in the day. Some jesters are like, oh, you got an asshole king. Okay, kill him. We're getting there now if we're not too careful. Jeez. Yeah, no kidding. Anything you say, it's crazy. But I think that's why Greg Gutfeld does so well on the Gutfeld show. It's the number one.

He's hilarious. And he always has humor in it. I've been doing this show since Red Eye, so I've seen that from the very beginning. And injecting that humor in it where there's a little germ of truth in there and you can make fun of it, that's what people appreciate. Not freaking, what's his name, dancing about getting the vaccine steven colbert he used to be so good though like when he was doing his the bit yeah dude when he was on bit he was spot on he played like a dumbass just like a retarded who's the other guy too uh the other guy the the british guy that was really good he had his own little segment it was just like oh same then john

oliver used to have oh he waits his first season was fucking hilarious because it was very much like libertarian we hate everybody who isn't who is you know not non-government like that the way that he approached things very early on was hilarious and then he just went the whole like orange man bad route orange man bad man, bad orange man, bad. And a lot of, there's a lot of like left leaning comedians who have even said like, you know, humor died when Trump took office because then comedy became not about like

what jokes you can make and what things are actually funny, but comedy became who could get the most applause from the audience. If you talk, not laughing, it's just applauding an idea. Like, oh, I agree with that. My little echo chamber is going to be so happy. And that's when SNL died.

Plus, Trump was funnier than them anyway. Yeah. He is funny as shit, and people don't get the humor. He says some really funny. You don't even have to agree with him. He's just a genuinely funny person. He is. You can totally disagree with him.

He'd be like, okay, you can disagree with wouldn't do i don't think he'd probably say some shit about you but that's part of the deal that's part of the deal i i've known him since for a long time before he was president when he was running the miss universe pageants miss america i think it was miss universe because yeah so i i judged it I judged Miss World, but he didn't run that. That was in London. That was a lot of fun. I could tell some stories. And then after the show.

After the show. Was this before or after you were kissing men for no money? This is before. Before. before. Before? I judged his universe pageant too for President Trump, but he was not President Trump. I'm Mr. Trump. And he, it was funny because there was

the, remember Carrie Prejean? This girl was crushing the competition and then gave a, had to give an answer about gay marriage. And she said, I believe in traditional marriage and this is what I believe in blah,

blah. And she didn't win because of that. And what's her belief. And you can believe whatever the hell you want to believe, you know, and that's, that she should be able to have that. And people go out,

you know, I don't agree with that or this or that, but she didn't win because of that. Or she had to give up the crown and became a big whole thing. And then, so he basically said, have your mind made up before the questions because this is a beauty contest. And I was like, that makes sense to me. I'd still ask the question.

And my girl didn't win. Whatever. It's not like I'm bitter. She took second. But whatever. But it was interesting because, you know, but he's so direct and he's so straightforward. There's no baloney with it. He's telling you what he thinks and that's it.

And I don't think that politicians do that very often. I know a lot of our politicians and the ones I know that I can speak to, I like them. They're good people. But there are a lot out there that are absolute buffoons who are frighteningly stupid. And it's just true. No, trust me. I know. I know you know.

You know. It's just that it's shocking that these people are – and this is the crowning achievement of their life. For you, you'd take a step down to go serve, and that's a cool thing. That was the moment that – there's a moment that you become an actual adult when you realize that your parents were as dumb as you are and you realize oh fuck they're just two people trying to make their way in the world and you that's a moment of growing up where you realize your parents are you you're like fuck okay they weren't the the this deity with all the answers they were just me and then you have that second moment when you come to politicians, you realize, oh, they're worse. A lot of these people are, you put them, I made the mistake in my own mind of thinking like, okay, if you're smart enough to

be able to get past all this process and get to this office, you have to have some level of intelligence, which is true. Like you do have to have some of that or at least the connections or whatever. But I always put them on like kind of a subconscious pedestal and then meeting a few of them there's a lot i have a lot of respect for there's a lot that i genuinely to this day consider very smart people very very good people but there's some of them i'm like oh fuck you're retarded yeah i mean the one with the that flipped an island what happens if the island no no let's be honest like this is the level of let's be honest. This is the level of... Hank Johnson. Let's be honest, though.

Guam's really small. I mean, so he really had a point. What happens if it flips? An AR-15 weighs as many as 10 boxes that you may be moving. What? Yeah. Encased in gold. You're talking about... Over and over and over.

Hank Johnson. Hank Johnson of Atlanta. Of Atlanta, where Guam would flip over. And he's still in gold. Over and over and over. Hank Johnson of Atlanta. Of Atlanta, where Guam would flip over. And he's still in Congress. Still in Congress. The look that that Navy Admiral gave him. It's confusion. He's not a boat.

We're not prepared for that eventuality. We're not prepared for that eventuality. You try to be so nice to him, too. You can tell he had equations flying past past his head and he was just thinking like i sir i don't want to give you an answer that's going to insult your intelligence just in case i misunderstood the question but fuck me if you're asking me what i think you're asking wouldn't it have been epic though if he'd just been like are you an idiot yeah He said that forever. He wanted to say that so bad. He would have said that if you were under his command.

Are you trolling me? Are you fucking with me? Sir, you retard. Islands don't tip over. I just wanted. You know they're not floating. They just don't. They're not a raft.

They're just out in the ocean. Just guam moving about. Guam keeps moving. Guam in Florida. Push it off. Damn it, guam's back in the air. They run and jump. Illegals, get out of the way.

A boat's just taking Guam. You have an engine on Guam that starts it and drives away. That's how we get rid of all the Cubans. We just dock Guam in Miami and put them all on board. There you go. Push it off.

Jesus Christ. It's frightening. That's a scary shit. And then you realize that is one out of 435 votes in the House. And he won. He got reelected, I think, twice since then. Yes. That's what's terrifying. That's not like one issue where

if I truly respected my congressman and then they said that about i can't do that anymore yeah you got oh this is a bad one though dude keeps winning just well it's all it's all in the up and up you know that right that's all no i hope so too i don't i don't think that it is but i think it's ugly as hell and you get the ballot stuffers and you get wanda the ballot stuffer she's running around out there and all the other folks running. It's just, that's some scary stuff. I'm all for showing voter ID.

I'm a hundred percent for that. Oh yeah. I'm a for single day voting. And if, unless you have a reason, you ask for an absentee ballot. I left California now and I've registered in Nevada and I was able to, but I registered as an independent because I don't want to follow anybody's line a hundred percent. Does Nevada have a open primaries? No. Okay. So I couldn't, I couldn't vote in follow anybody's line 100%. Does Nevada have open primaries? No.

Okay. So I couldn't vote in this. That was the only reason why I never, whenever I registered to vote, I never registered as a libertarian or something, which is where my ideology is more so. I'm pretty much in the same ballpark. But I never registered that way because I wanted to be able to vote in primaries. Yep. But I chose to not do that. Yeah.

And I'll just suck it up. My son did the same. His girlfriend actually did the same as well. Not that I'm running the votes in my house. Right. I'm just saying, if they want to eat, straighten up. Just cut it off right there. Just straighten up.

No, we talk politics in the house. And my son's 24. His girlfriend's 20. And it's really interesting to hear their perspective on things and hear what, you know, what they know. But they, first of all, they know Jack shit unless they've been there. Now my son's been to Israel and Jordan, so he's spent some time over there. He's seen a lot of the things.

And my son and I were at this spot where they believe, um, was the, the baptism site for Jesus Christ. And it's pretty damn cool to be able to get down there. Exactly. Well, literally. Literally. And it was really cool. And it turned out that my buddy from Princeton.

And was that John the Baptist? Yeah, John the Baptist. And we got to see the cave where John the Baptist was. And all these places they found. And the guy who runs all that was a kid that I went to college with and now is one of the princes of Jordan. And that's the good thing about going to school at Princeton is the people you run around with.

I mean, I was two years behind. So when I was a sophomore, the seniors were Jeff Bezos and Michelle Obama. But I didn't know either one of them. I'd like to go back in time and buddy up with Bezos and be like, hey, listen, if you need any seed money for any companies you're thinking about, I'll just help. I'll get to you. He was 10,000. Appreciate you, dog, if you need any seed money for any companies you're thinking about, I'll just help. I'll get to you. Use 10,000. Appreciate you, dog.

Appreciate you, dog. That was your, like, I'd love to go back in time and invest in Bitcoin. I'm telling you, man, that was crazy. But that dude's insane when you see his business venture in that level of taking off. It's like, it's a bookstore. It's no longer a bookstore. I sell everything. I feel like a fucking dinosaur when I buy books

on Amazon did his wife become the richest woman on the planet by divorcing him she became like one of the top 10 richest people in the world by divorcing him and instantly we're at I would divorce anyone for I don't know

for 110 billion dollars babe we're just cutting it we're staying together first off because you made a lot of money and i'd be like where was this business venture how did you do this without my knowledge so eli you're really lucky that your couch is comfortable. So lucky. That just happened. Just keep digging, homie. I watched it happen.

This is $20 billion. And she got, I think it was like $110 billion from the divorce or something. That's crazy. 80 to 100. Who was the second? Was it like Oprah? Oprah? Oprah. But Oprah's net worth, she was the first black billionaire.

And then there was a couple female billionaires before that, one being the girl off of Seinfeld. Really? Yeah, most people don't realize she's richest. Louis Dreyfus, yeah. I did not know that. Is it her husband's money or is it her family money? And then there's J.K. Rowling, I believe.

She sold $1.2 billion for and then she went down to under a billion for charities, and then probably still back. I love her. Good for her. She's a fucking monster. I like that no one would buy her book, and they're like, this is trash.

This is trash. She's like, okay. And then company finally got it, and they're like, you can have most of the rights. So when it just took off. God. Yeah. That's why she's worth an arm in a,

like just printing money with that series. But you know, that's also she's worth an arm in like just printing money with that series. You know, that's also like Sopranos. So everybody took that show out there. Every network turned it down. Everybody said no. No shit. Everybody. And then boom, HBO makes it.

It's a monster. So God bless her. Well done. You never give up. That's the thing. You just keep going. You keep going. You keep going.

Say you lose a congressional race by like 400 seats. You't give up you don't do this right i'm sorry did i say that you're one of like six people in the last fucking two days you've just been like so you're not you're not quitting right like i'm like i'm trying to quit every time i didn't want to do it the first time brandon quit that's the thing but you know what the fact that you didn't want to do it the first time Brandon quit But you know what the fact that you didn't want to do it Is the exact reason you should run And I know you probably heard that a thousand times They tell it to me all the time only I didn't buy it You did thank god

Thanks pal The truth is There's truth to it there really is I don't want to run I don't want to be in that situation They will find shit make up shit that I've done the whole thing with the donkey is bullshit i told you that earlier that the donkey thing didn't happen i know i know i know you did a breakdown on it and everything but that wasn't me you can't prove it was me there's a there i had a mask on

but that's the thing but that will show up 98 film dean kisses donkey it was 2001 he had a luchador mask and everything it was like it was a deep fake it didn't exist a cheap fake as kareem jumpier says dude i we we've talked about multiple times is just seeing the level of corruption with and how they manipulate stuff for politics congress anything like that was eye-opening i hate i after the military i was like fuck politics fuck government because a lot of a lot of veterans like you said earlier are disenfranchised with with media with the government with everything and they have a fucking right to be yes they do and then we sing that and then firsthand watching just brain and

get run like over by a bus by a republican and they were just switching they were just like no this is just take that soundbite take that soundbite he's a piece of shit whatever it is i'm like oh god heaven forbid you make a joke you like this story i at one point i think there's a there's a there's multiple things they've taken out of context my favorite one was the the california thing i don't know i don't think i know this one so i hate california anyway now so i legitimately said like because i've been to california for i used to have i used to date people there and like whatnot like and i've been there for business and much other shit i genuinely think california is a beautiful place gorgeous beautiful place i said california is

probably my favorite state in the country everybody yeah exactly it's my favorite state in the country. Cut. Yeah, exactly. Cut. It's my favorite state in the country if everybody who lived there didn't. That's funny. Verbatim, what I said. They know shit for an ad. Cut, where I said, California is my favorite state in the country. Those two seconds.

No, they literally cut that. They were running it on San Antonio television here for a long time. We'd be sitting at brunch or sitting at the bar, and Brandon would be on the TV saying, California is my favorite state in the country. They're like, cut. Brandon Herrera is a fake Republican in Texas. He loves California.

By the way, also at the same time, he's a right-wing neo-Nazi. Like all sorts of shit. It's like, dude, i'm just a normal guy who just wants the constitution to be respected i'm sorry but isn't that disgusting yeah but that's the what we have to go through and then what we have to see and and what we isn't first of all as a country that has to watch and try to sift through all that bullshit try to figure out what the truth is and then when you do see it you're like wait a minute there's his entire quote and that doesn't make

any sense. It's the same thing that Trump's going through with the very fine people bullshit hoax. And I'm not talking about the neo-Nazis, the white supremacists. They should be condemned totally. That's the statement. Not there's very fine people on both sides. That stuff is crazy. My favorite was

the most recent one where he's at a rally, and he's joking about people. It was so fucking it was so fucking hot he was talking about like oh i don't want anybody to fall out like be careful like everybody make sure you hydrate and everything's like but you know i don't really care about you i just care about your votes and they're gonna yeah and then he jokes he's like oh just wait till you see that on the news they're gonna say i said a horrible thing and that's pretty good. And they cut it immediately. Of course. Yeah.

They're still holding on to it. Yeah. They cut that bitch. I don't care about you. I just care about your votes. That's all they did. Cause he's very clearly making a joke about how hot it is and whatnot. Wow.

It's weird. I'd never want to touch politics. And I'm fucking awful. But as a person sitting home torture. Yeah. And someone sit at home, they're watching. How do you sit through the bullshit?

How do you know? Which is the terrible part about American politics now is that it's, it's all about money. It's whoever has the most money to push a narrative wins. We got outspent 10 to one. And even though we were right on most of the stuff and like, even the people on my opponent's team knew that that wasn't the truth. They could push it.

They had the money to push it. And that's what people think even to this day like the people that like confront us at bars over shit that i allegedly said it's like that was retarded oh yeah we talked about did we talk about that the one dude brandon no veterans naturally everyone knows this as a veteran brandon is a veteran fuck off but a dude. We do the double salute for Brandon. That's what. It's like I've always been a guy. Like I've been around it my entire life. That's always been my sense of humor.

I've always supported veteran groups and everything because I think it's important. Like it's a genuine thing. And because things were taken out of context, there's now people who come up to me in public thinking like, bro, I can't believe hate america's veterans it's like are you serious like i hate all veterans not just americans oh yeah oh anybody everyone if you don that flag fuck you unfortunately that that clip right there gets cut up and that's what he says that's it now they can push that okay for when eli runs for uh eli purple heart recipient hates veterans 100 100 by that i mean 100 disabled yeah fuck yourself 100 go fuck yourself it's just crazy man the amount of people think that like i'm immune to propaganda and then they fall for that.

It's like, no, everybody like, and it's hard to, to, to combat that because, you know, if you're having enough money spent against you. You hear the message over and over and over. That's why I hate white people. Yep. Same here. Same here. Yeah.

It's funny. Replace white with anything else and we'd be worried about being age-restricted on YouTube. Can we get the algorithm up real quick? I hate white people. I hate white people. Star Wars Acolyte is great.

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You know the next month when we do shit with the NAACP, it's gonna get wild Speaking of would you like to go into the offenders? Oh no. Tell me about the offenders Cody break it down. All right, we have a superhero group. Obviously, name the offenders. Like the Avengers. I get it. Yeah. So you name a superpower.

It's going to be hard with you. We already know who you are. Damn it. You name a superpower. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. That's pretty good.

And then everyone has to, like everyone in the group group comes up with an offset for it for instance i said i can fly but in order to fly i have to shout racial slurs so if he has to rescue uh section eight children from a fire uh he's just bringing a ladder yeah fair or why aren't you flying us out of here don't hear you little oh my god Jesus wow it's great

so I'm invincible but I constantly kill myself I can't die permanently I can't die permanently but my body stays where it was. So if I just wake up in the morning and I see three of myself hanging from the ceiling fan, I'm like, oh, we didn't handle Thursday well. Friday?

Because I don't remember. Because I don't remember how it happened. Yeah, which is – I just don't like that one. I am crime cuck. I travel at the speed of light, kind of like the Flash, but I can't interact with objects for five minutes upon arrival. So think about a heinous crime taking place. Can't do anything.

He can't interrupt it. He has to sit there and watch for five minutes. Say stuff. You stop it. You're dick small. You can't go back in time. I just can't time travel. He's not so fast.

You can't time travel. No. That sucks. I wouldn't want that. I don't want yours. But you want to fly? Yeah. I don't care about that. That sucks. I wouldn't want that. I don't want yours. But you want it fly? Well, yeah. Yeah.

I don't care about that. That doesn't bother me that much. I got a super fly man over here. You guys are here. Well, you guys already have your stuff figured out. No, I mean, what are you going to say? You're already fucking Homelander. Very much so.

I haven't watched that yet, but oh, my God. I catch bits of it. I was like, wow. I catch bits of it. I was like, wow. I have to see it. It's what superheroes would probably turn into really quickly, especially if they're like how it's actually in the comics or the show without ruining anything. When it's like that and then you're elevated to the status

of like a Hollywood celebrity and you have all the power in the fucking world. Especially with you coming from the Hollywood space, I feel like you would appreciate that movie or that show i want to see what's it called the uh the boys the boys yeah i've heard about it a lot i've never had the time to see it and i'm going to take the time so you are superman but would you want that those powers or would you want a different set of powers i mean those powers are pretty damn good because it does have the flying power does have the invincible power you heat up soup you can heat up soup you can shave in the mirror

very carefully i don't know how that one worked um you can see through things you can see through objects like you don't have to just see through you know a dress you can like look at harvey weinstein yeah you can give you're trying to be a peeping Tom you're just like randomly you have cancer exactly oh my gosh your heart valve is closing what were you looking you're looking at some thick women buddy they have big old women in San Antonio oh shit what would I so if I so you you're probably the only guest we will ever allow to have all of those powers just because you already had them. I had them.

Yeah. I had them. I understand that. But it is Homelander. He's very much Homelander. He is. I saw that for a little bit. I was like, I don't know if I can watch this.

I don't know if I'm mentally prepared to watch this because it's really good how they do like Home Hunter. You're like, he's awesome. And then you're like, oh, fuck, dude. He's a fucking psycho. The American way. Oh, does he? See, I believe in the American way. And so that will really disturb me.

It really will. You will love it, too. It is crazy how well that actor. What's the actor's name? Andrew Star. Andy Star? Anthony Star. He looks good. Dude, he fucking nails it every time actor what's the actor's name andrew star andy star is it anthony star anthony star thank you

he looks good dude he is he fucking nails it every time and how he does a psychopath especially when he's talking to himself you're like he's a great actor dude you are uncomfortable when he walks in and he is so good at facial micro expressions it is fucking terrifying all right now i have to watch it he's also uh he was one of the few superhero uh you know main characters and in uh popular media now who refused to do the workout program he's like no just give me a muscle suit who gives a i love that he does not give he's not doing steroids he's not doing anything he's like yeah i'm just gonna just give me a fucking muscle suit when does fast grocery delivery through instacart matter most when your famous grainy mustard potato salad isn't so famous without the grainy mustard.

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muscle suit wow he's like 130 pounds so is it really oh my god tiny guy that's wow that suit is like he's probably a buck fifty. Wow. He was big in Banshee. Did you ever see Banshee? No. It was such a good show with him. He's just a good actor.

He's just an incredible actor, dude. Spot on. Chef's kiss. Fucking amazing. Like you said, with those little micro... The things he does with his face. Beautiful. He looks like... He can be full full-on smile and

a tear will come like he is fucking a psychopath yeah psychopath and you're like and he's dangerous and that makes him dangerous as shit oh and when he talks to the troops in that show he's like you guys are the real heroes i saw that scene yeah i saw that scene just cutting dudes dope as shit yeah that's yeah he's a bit psycho power power well

that's why I like the version of Superman because he was raised by small town Kansas you know parents

with strong small town American values that's why I like he could have been Homelander but instead he was Clark Kent

that's the truth god that was so good it's the truth though I say it all so good. It's the truth, though. I say it all the time. I say I believe in that phrase, truth dresses the American way, because of that. Because, excuse me. Thank you, Fauci. I'm good.

More of that COVID, yeah. He could have done anything. He could have been, you know, I like that guy back here. I appreciate you guys having him in here with me. Yeah, we got Big H back here. Big Henry. He's a nice, real nice guy. And he did a great job with Superman.

It was just a very dark version of it. But they sort of put the Jesus thing up there and did that whole thing with him. And it was just a dark version. And I appreciate what they did. Zack Snyder makes great films and tremendous. He's got some tremendous images in that too, but it just wasn't my favorite iteration of it. And I liked the more positive.

Who was your favorite? Christopher Reeve. Okay. Yeah. Christopher Reeve was my Superman. I, that I was just like, you know,

I was 1978 or something like that. I know you guys probably weren't born, but whatever. But I was, you weren't even close to being born. Not even close. Some of the shows. I know.

That's fucked up. Yeah. We've all seen it. Dude, it's so good. I enjoyed being here. Thanks guys. Bye.

Can I have my wheelchair? Can I have my wheelchair? God, you made the joke before. I was worried about being the guy who did it. I'm like, well, why do flex on it by walking away? I didn't mean that wheelchair. You, you made the joke before. I was worried about being the guy who did it. I'm like, well, why do you flex on it by walking away? I didn't mean that wheelchair.

You're the one that made it. Clip it. Clip it. Clip it. He hates Christopher. Well, I got something to say about that, though. Listen, we've all been around people, police officers or military or even just athletes who end up in a chair like that. And you always,

you always ask yourself, or I, at least I have because I've been close to having real problems in a football game and things like that. And I've been knocked out and put my head down when I shouldn't put it down and things like that. How would you react to that situation where you have no physical movement? You know how you always go, what would I, how would I do? And I don't know that I would be able to be as gracious or as Superman like as Christopher Reeve was.

That's unbelievable. And what he continued to do and his spirit. And that was amazing. So that's the most Superman thing he ever did in my book. That was, that was amazing. And I, I was able to go to his foundation one time and I saw his kids and everything went out there and it was it was it was very inspiring but he was my superman and

how he reacted to that was was was truly superhuman you're such a good dude no it's a truth though think about it i know you trust me i i'm not like no one's joking about it that's i'm just saying like usually you would have a plethora of dark jokes from what you're saying i mean i could come out and say how do you feel about christopher walking that's a play on words man i'm sorry i did i'm gonna go now i did i did with christopher walking which was fun oh shit what was that it was called five dollars a day i. I just did a couple days on it. He was at a...

How many men did you kiss? Four. I don't market that way. I'm going to kiss you for $5. $5. Paul, it's right here. Pucker up, my guy. Superman, here. I'll kiss you. Paula Tracy. Look her up. My God. That's pretty good. That's Superman. Here. Stay.

I'll kiss you. There's only one guy in the world who does that, and it's him. It's amazing. He's so good at it. So he and his kid are – he's shown his kid how they can live on $5 a day by going to the local kissing dudes, going to the local place and have the free breakfast at the – acting like you're staying at the hotel and hotel and blah blah blah all that just like taking kids to Costco oh god yeah are we talking about my father now that was the idea of this this movie with Christopher Walken and I end up he ends up coming into our wedding a wedding of my daughter and somebody else and whatever and then uh he starts dancing with my wife and then I get mad and want to beat

him up. It was fun. Did you fight Christopher? Well, I think I threw him up against the, threw him up against the offense and threatened to kick his ass and something happened. I forget.

This is awesome. You forgot the one time you fought Christopher walking. He was so nice. He was such a great guy. He's the emperor of the universe. Now it was awesome. Oh yeah. Back to powers. I like, Oh yeah. Sorry like oh yeah sorry podcasts were like okay everyone buckle up we just landed

france this is one of those podcasts just kind of like mighty mouse is like we just realized like okay instant friend yeah we like this guy i like this just kind of goes off the rails i apologize for that but i like you guys man oh thank you that's why i'm here that's why i'm here it's a good family right five dollars five dollars i'm just laying in if you have a hat bro i wouldn't even charge you five oh thank you you're gonna kiss me for my service ten dollars tongue whatever bro it was so funny We talked about this on a podcast previously. My father, when I was a child, he was very cheap. And we would go to a Mexican restaurant.

My God, this was your dance floor. Yeah, no, it actually is. I'm surprised Rick Garrett didn't write this fucking story that you're talking about for that movie. We would go to a Mexican restaurant. We would eat the chips and drink water and then leave. And then we would go to Costco. Wait, hold up he didn't uh he would wait until like he was like here he's like we're still looking and then you guys bounce

without paying yeah they don't order anything but then we would get your water free we would go to to costco or sam's club similar and we would you know just do a little tour around and eat the samples for like an hour and that's how my dad fed us during the summer so it was like five dollars a day dude damn yeah sweet maybe he did right i don't know who wrote that my father based on the life my father wrote that absolutely holy smack that's exactly it that's what this realize he was really cheap and he actually had a lot of royalties from that movie god damn it. Where's my money? That Mexican restaurant.

I was doing research, son. What an asshole. They knew who you were because you probably went there multiple times every time you come in. You go there three times a week. Yeah, so they're like, that dude never orders food.

Stop bringing out chips. They're like, oh, fuck. It's Cody's dad again. He's like, how does it feel? Hey. There's salsa stuff and water and then they're gone again fuck you got us again

wow I'm just thinking like the deepest Georgia accent like leaving like lo siento every time he's a villain audios amigos god damn it dad wow i know i'm only seven but i understand what's happening right now i never knew this story i didn't i didn't i never that's good that is a fucking that's one way to go i love it all our parents had different poor people techniques to raise us. Poor people techniques?

That's what I call that. There's a t-shirt. What's on the front? That's like our consulting company, PPT. PPT. Poor people techniques. Poor people techniques. That's a good shirt. We got to figure out what's on the front, though.

Hey, I lived in a trailer park. I lived in a trailer park. I did, too, buddy. You lived in a trailer park i lived in a trailer park i did you lived in a trailer park in malibu that had been like a million dollar trailer you know what's so funny that was tiny it was a regular piece of shit trailer the lot is like 50 000 no no no listen to this i swear to god this happened yesterday i was looking at like you know you get your tons of emails come through i looked at one and somebody that i knew was a real estate agent they're like listing in paradise cove which is

where i grew up it's a trailer park i clicked on it just to see what the hell this was i shit you not 3.7 million dollars for how much for a trailer trailer park, just one little single lot trailer. Holy fuck. $3.7 million. For just the lot? And the trailer. Okay. It looks like a piece of shit trailer.

Yeah, like a prefab. Yeah, you'd just be like, take this one out, let's bring another one in. My sister lives in a trailer park. I love my sister. That's insane, dude. Just why are you having California these little fucking lots that you have seven stories high? Because the fucking lot itself is like two million. But they won't let you go past 28 feet like my old house.

28 feet was it. That's the limit. Get in front of somebody else's view. My sister lives in a trailer park now, but it's right over the ocean. It's right there. It's gorgeous and blah, blah, blah. But it's a fucking trailer. It's probably expensive.

Worth two million dollars. I'm going to say it's not cheap well if one sold for three point and i love the trailer park names are always my favorite what was yours paradise cove and then we had imperial states and crawfordsville dude imperial states you have like the nicest if you just write it you're like oh we must go visit oh my god fort bragg like last time I remember walking around a trailer park because I did real estate there for a while I remember it was like fucking

I don't remember like mystical forest or whatever the fuck is the name and it's like legitimately like single wides and there was just like a dude walking around without a shirt with a shotgun mystical forest mystical forest damn right

where's the elves at and like a former business partner of mine was like hey can you you mind checking up on my brother he lives like here just like these dudes walking around no shirt shotgun whatever i'm like i'm sure he's fine i'm leaving leaving. What was his trailer park called? Indian Creek Park. That sounds like a trailer park. Indian Creek Park. I can see that. Paradise Cove was mine.

My sister lives in the Point Doom Club. Point Doom? Yeah, Point Doom is sort of that. Have you ever seen Malibu? D-U-M-E. I know I have a saying Dune or Doom? D-U-M-E. I know I have a cold. Like hard? Doom.

But it's D-U-M-E. That also sounds like a trick. We're going to hell. We're going to Mount Doom. It's Point Doom. D-U-M-E. No Doom. But it's $ it's Three million dollars

There's not I've heard of For one with a view The view is incredible But Trailer park At least I don't got Eve dude Dude a trailer

And you're just like Pay three more For this fucking thing What Get the fuck out of here Well that's the problem That's why California Has that

Huge disparity Between the Uber rich And then the Everyone else is trying To make it And get through And that's why they have 40% of the country's homelessness are in california and they got all these damn

these these that's not true every time i see the olympics there they they they're off the street or when uh the foreign leaders come the chinese come to visit san francisco that shit is clean as can be pretty clean in a day it reminds me of what they used to do with what fucking soviet leaders when they brought in american diplomats. Just like clean up all the streets, clean up all the bread lines. Have them come through. Don't go inside the store. Just look at the outside. Look at everything there. Do it for me. You did better.

Do not look in the store, okay? It's very cold right now. Past hour, no one there. Oh my God, look how beautiful it is. That's it. The sunrise, okay? You it is. That's it. Okay, keep moving. The sunrise. People smiling every... Smile!

Jesus Christ. That's like 100% it. When Cody started his crazy business of podcasting, you know what he didn't think about? Merchandise. But now he's selling what? Merch. And it couldn't be easier.

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Rothy's, and Brooklinen. My favorite companies. What is that? No clue, but they also power millions of other entrepreneurs across 175 countries. Because businesses that grow, grow with Shopify. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash unsubpod. All lowercase. Go to shopify.com slash unsubpod. All lowercase. Go to shopify.com slash unsubpod now to grow your business, no matter what stage you're in. Go to shopify.com slash unsubpod. Uh, what is it? Who's in North Korea right now?

Kim Jong-un. No, but... Dennis Rodman. Sorry. Is he still? No, I thought it was a quiz. Russian president. Vladimir Putin.

Vladimir Putin. Putin's in North Korea right now He's not the president, he is the owner He's the owner of Russia Let's be honest He's the king Jeff Bezos is the richest man in the world Depends on if you count acquired property

But he is in Russia right now Which is the weirdest fucking shit. The North Korean is in Russia or Putin's in North Korea? Putin's actually been seen and he's with in North Korea. They're doing a diplomatic. He's meeting with them because... I hear the Wi-Fi there is shit.

Did you read the story that one dude crushing it? Fucking close as can be. That was really close. Dude's most surreal photos because it's... I saw that this morning. They're just driving. Yes, but there's no one on the

fucking road because no one has vehicles in North Korea. So it is... I'm just putting my mind self being a Russian president going. First off, it's a weird mindset to even be in. And then you're like, I'm just going to hang out with kim jong-un right now i mean my my favorite part is that it is absolutely impossible to not be spied on by foreign powers in that situation because you

are literally the only blip on the entire goddamn map of north korea that can be seen from space it's literally the only light literally and then they did um did you see that one dude crashed all he took down north korea's entire internet system one dude for a week he crashed the entire internet platform who where was he from america he just talked about it like he was like yeah he's a hacker um i think yeah he's american i'm pretty sure we've done that with a usb before so like it's not that difficult dude his story's fucking hilarious because he was like yeah he was just pinging north korea and i seen it and they would just ping from one router the entire time or two routers he was like huh the country would yeah he was like two routers that

can't be for reference most countries like have like $40 million or something like that. So he was like, I'm going to go with these guys. He was like, I'll just pay $5,000 to Flum with this certain type of hacker shit to crash the system. And sure, he was like, yeah, it brought the entire fucking thing down

for a week. Because when he went to check on the router after doing the attack, it just came back no dead yeah error error like oh i just shut down all north korea's internet holy crap and he's like it could have been done for 2500 it's like the first thing he said i could have done half the price and would have crashed the entire server meanwhile like you've got somebody in the dod yeah just like looking looking at all their servers going down because we've been monitoring

that shit from the inside for two decades now. They're just like, alright, who did it? Who did it? That's what everyone started saying. They're like, god damn it, you dickhead. Everyone probably knew that they only had two routers and it was easy to monitor. Now they're going to up their security. Up their game.

It's like, we're going to crash it. Okay, back to the superpower. No, I still don't have one. By the way, in North Korea, there were like seven people going, I don't have internet. Yeah, I know. No, it was seven. Nobody else knew. I don't think they

can access it very well. So what superpower would you want? You are allowed to say the Superman superpowers. I'll say the Superman superpowers, but I don't know what my... Well, you get to choose your offset. Oh, good. Pretend it's done. I'll take the Superman superpowers. The offset's going to suck.

That's just too much power. He's got all the powers. We're going to give him the special gift of all the powers. Yeah, he is Superman. He's literally a DC. I did get to play all those powers. Which, by the the way is just when you're shooting that and like kids are there and you have to jump off of a couple apple boxes and land to come into a scene they're all first of all they show up and they're they walk in and they're like oh my god it's superman you're like oh oh, kids, I'm going to talk to you. I hate it so much.

And then the camera's there and I have to jump in off of something and land. And I'm like, yeah, I'm here. And the kids are like... And then I fly out just by whipping the cape up in the air and everybody goes... And I'm still there. I'm hiding over the corner. And the kids are like... It's a little... It gets a bit humbling it gets a bit humbling oh movie magic's a great

and you know the cold breath of the eyes it's just you're just going like this and nothing's happening people like and then something blows up and they're like oh okay pretty cool yeah you look really stupid as an actor sometimes you'd have to kiss men did i say i was gonna say that i you're gonna hate me for it but that's your offset you have to kiss a man before you activate any of the powers stop okay fine let's go let's go let's go time to fly out of here let's go that's not an offset it's a solid like five second kiss it's a strong kiss if he wants to activate them oh no he can only use his super kiss if he wants to activate the power. Oh no. He can only use his superpowers if he's touching

another man's dick. We've already done that. Who was it? It was the elastic? It was Lorelaj. That's a rough one. I like a solid five minute and then you have a five second kiss, tongue and all, and then

you get a five minute power up. I might be kissing and then you get a five-minute power-up. I might be kissing a lot of dudes for that. That would save you a lot. Gotta just put that by the wayside. I would use that power-up a lot. I'm like, ah, this is a great offset. The American way? I'd have to be based out of West Hollywood,

otherwise I wouldn't be able to kiss that many. It'd be a little tougher. We're going to test your theory. I'm going to kiss you for 10 seconds. I'll see if it lasts for 10 minutes. I'm thinking of like, let's test it again. I'm thinking of the Mad Max version of your superhero where you just have a twink in a cage.

It's on his back. He just flies with him on his back. Get out of here. Oh. It's like, no. No, daddy, no. Wow. Mr. Connor got the drink for Mr. Herrera.

That's pretty good. Thank you, Mr. Hollis. You have the Superman superpowers, but they don't work on Earth. Holy crap. I wouldn't be able to do a whole lot here you gotta kiss men on mars the most powerful man in the universe as long as you aren't here then you're just a normal guy you're the most powerful man on the in the, but your powers only work in non-America. In non-America?

Or only against minorities. Oh, God. His powers only work against minorities, so he just looks terrible no matter what. It's like, fuck. You can be a superhero. He never attacked white people. You can be a superhero in Canada, but like...

Nobody cares. There goes the conflict. You land, you just see white people, you fly away. You just look terrible no matter what. You're like, Jesus, Superman is terrible. He lands in Las Vegas during that shooting? The country concert? He's just like, oh, fuck, I can't do anything.

Oh my god. Can I live in Las Vegas now? That'd be awful. Dean Cain here. I like that twink in the cage. Whatever. I don't want to get serious about it, but if I can choose, it's the twink in the cage. The twink in the cage. But I do love those Mad Max cars.

I just want the twink in the cage. What's my superpower? Yeah, I want the twink in the cage. What's my superpower? I want the twink in the cage. What's my offset? What's your power? I told you. I told you. I want the twink in the cage, Dean Cain 2024. Lois and Clark and the twink in the back.

In Mad Max, they call them what? My blood bag. Give me my blood bag. For him, it's like, give me my comeback. Oh. Oh, no. That line? That line hits different. Right over the edge. I didn't realize.

Jesus fucking Christ. The whole blood bag thing. Have you read the lore on that entire... That is a whole lore system. Dude, Mad Max has an entire lore system from, mean mel gibson's that was amazing back in the day oh dude and the new one even uh the fuck who's on anya anya babe what is it that's the new one that's the girl who feels and that i it didn't i haven't seen it yet but it's actually really good like it's a good ass just violent there's i love it just violent and it's cinematic as hell not as good as uh what's

it called the fury road fury road is perfection well it's really fucking good tom hardy that one yeah okay let's take a second talk about tom hardy all right let's talk about tom that's a bad motherfucker right there he's cool yeah that's just a bad man out there just rocking people just jiu-jitsu tournaments doesn't give a shit my son's a bj guy so and i i can strike that out of my son but when he gets a piece of me i hate it i can't hold on and yeah and i'm and i'm old and i'm fat and out of shape and he just starts getting on me and i can throw him around for like three minutes and then he just starts going and he's just moving everything all the time and i'm fat and out of shape and he just starts getting on me and i can throw him around for like three minutes and then he just starts going and he's just moving everything all the time and i'm like all right i'm tired it's over and he's like you can't do that dad i'm like yeah

i can i'm dad i'm fucking tired and it's over because in a minute he's gonna have me in a you know in a choke and i don't like it but hardy it's a animal man that guy that dude i believe everything he says because you see him do this and real life. So when he says, you know, when he gives you that look or something, you're like, this motherfucker can hurt you. I think he just got his purple belt. Damn! He's moving up there, dude. He's moving quick, too.

Damn! Who's this? Tom Hardy? When you have a lot of money at your dispense. He can accomplish it. Oh, dedication to the craft, too. Also, as an athlete, you've got to have mean in you.

He's got mean in him. He's got it in there. You see it. Yeah, you see it. When we had Demetrius, like Demetrius Johnson, like one of the kindest, amazing human,

also absolutely terrifying. Mighty Mouse, they called him that? Yeah, Mighty Mouse. When he's talking about fighting at his age, because... How old is he?

He's 38. He's one year younger than me, which is like he is aging way better than all of us. Way better. Black and don't crack. As he said. A yellow stays a mellow

for me. It's clearly working for both of you. He's going to do another fight soon. Is he fighting again? He's going to do another fight soon. Is he fighting again? He's about to do another professional fight. Oh, he's doing, yeah, because he's doing his jiu-jitsu tournaments. What organization?

He still fights for one, I think is what it's called, but then also he does the open jiu-jitsu. This is open, so there's no weight classes on some of them them which is fucking ridiculous and when you hear him talk about fighting at he fights at 135 to 155 and he's like oh no i still got my movement and you see him he's in fucking phenomenal shape he it clicks when he wants to shoot guns when we took him shooting homeboy got like mechanic stone it's frighteningly fast he

went from like he's not like a he's a gun guy but he's not like a gun frighteningly fast he went from like he's not like a he's a gun guy but he's not like a gun gun guy but he went from like very casual shooting to locked in hitting everything with every shot very quick like he just took instruction very well there's a mindset to that kind of an athlete michael jordan uh demetrius johnson there's something about you you click it in. It goes. One of my fellow officers in Pocatello, Idaho, is a gentleman named Hoist Gracie. Hoist is a well-known name. Yeah.

He's a very good shooter, too. So he also speaks English, but his first language is Portuguese, and he's from Brazil. And so we were doing our qualifications together, and I'm assistant gunner for him. He's my assistant. We go back and forth. But we're warming up. We're getting ready. We're shooting targets, doing things,

since the range master's talking about the different things we have to shoot. We had to shoot these little circles here, and so we're going to the top circles. And as we're warming up, and he shot at a different circle because he clearly didn't understand and i thought i was being funny and i was like i go hoist man either you either you hit everything inside that black and i can't even see the hole or you shot the wrong circle he's like what i was like i was like oh fuck the joke didn't hit at all i was like uh i go i think you shot the wrong circle and he's like which one we supposed to shoot he's like the top right he's like oh so the go-through qualifies he hits a hundred percent

and i was like well fuck there you go then he goes it's because you challenged me i was like i didn't challenge you man i was just teasing i was trying to make a joke you were fighting i don't want to fight no i was like holy shit no one wants to fight you man those fighters do fighters are fine but do you remember hoist back in the day when they was fighting there was pride forget pride

the first UFC there was no weight classes man they were just OG UFC was fucking ridiculous it was just there you go in a cage and go the boxer shows up

with one glove on his hand and so he can grab a punch literally he had one glove he's like I got you for three minutes and yeah very much white trash they're like what tank abbott oh my god lived in a trailer fighter fucking ken shamrock dude just voided out of his mind his traps touched his i don't know

yeah he wore his hat on his traps. Dude, those guys are fucking. And he always won it, though. Yeah, multiple years. Yeah, first one. But he is so gnarly, and he is so dialed in. You see it click. You're like, whoop.

Okay, there it goes. And I didn't challenge him. It's like Michael Jordan. He wants you to do something. Did you just look at me funny? You looked at me funny. That's why I want to do it. And you're like, I just looked over at you to do something that what did you just look at me funny you you looked at me funny that's what i want to do it and you're like i didn't i just looked over at you they make you an enemy for something i'm like i didn't fucking challenge you hoist

that's jeez what's uh sean strickland that's the one i would love he's one that's just when you read or see his stuff it's like he's just he loves fighting he loves violence and that one i'm like i'm not gonna not even gonna joke about fighting no he's a genuinely crazy person but i love it and i love like following him on twitter is fucking incredible oh yeah there's the x x uh i don't follow him on on x and then you know missing out he's fucking hysterical there is no filter on that is a dude that is a human that was built with zero filter that's a good thing i love it it's a great thing i just i'm like there's that it's okay oh yeah he's he is very who he is you don't wonder it's fucking hilarious to watch unfold a lot of time i'm like dude i'm not gonna say you don't have to agree but oh no like he doesn't give up we got that i would it's not to get

canceled it's just like repercussions for what you say sometimes and we'll all filter ourselves to a degree where you're like but you can also get to a level where you have said so much outlandish shit that it's really hard it It's a good technique. Yeah. You're doing really good. You've thrown out so much out there. Everybody's just like, ah, well, you know, that's Sean. Which is where he's at. That whole, like, how do you say, work harder, child?

Like, that whole interview? I didn't see it. You've not seen it? No, I haven't seen it. Oh, my God. He's literally, he's talking to, there's a, I believe it's a Chinese interviewer is talking to him. Fuck.

And he was like, it's fine. It's fine. And now you're like, holy shit. It's a Chinese interviewer. He's like, can you say, you know,

blah, blah, which is basically just like, hello or whatever the fuck. He was like, well, what am I saying? Before you say that, like,

what am I saying? All right. All right, cool. I'll say that. But like, can you tell me, I'm thinking about starting a merch brand that is obviously it's gonna be like a

fucking sweatshop in china uh can you say like uh work harder child no food till you finish like how do you say that shit hey but there's a german truth in that isn't it i mean that's why it's so fucking funny that's what makes it so funny yeah holy shit and at least he acknowledges it it's it's fucking it's funny comedy's supposed That's what makes it so funny. At least he acknowledges it. It's funny. Comedy is supposed to offend, man. Comedy is supposed to hurt a little bit. It's supposed to get you. Crazy concept.

Having just comedy. Look what your face did at the freaking Golden Globes again. It goes back. I think we're on that tick. We've talked about it a few times. We're swinging back. The pendulum is coming back. Yeah, dude. You get Shane Gillis.

Everyone's starting to say gay again. Say retard. We finally got retard back, dude. Retard, like we firmly planted that back. Yeah. Eli, have you heard about Raycon's everyday E25 earbuds? Eli! Eli!

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happiness guarantee so what are you waiting for call to action go to buyraycon.com slash unsub to get 15 off of your order plus free shipping that That's right. You'll get 15% off and free shipping over at buyraycon.com slash unsell. What was the last season of Lois and Clark? It was season... How many seasons did it go for? We did four. Okay. It was 1997. Okay. So those were like the... Did you know

it was coming to a conclusion? No, we were picked up for season four. Season five. We were going to do the season but in the hiatus, Terry Hatcher got... She was pregnant and it became a very complicated pregnancy and she were going to do the season but in the hiatus, Terry Hatcher, she was pregnant and it became a very complicated pregnancy and she was going to be on her back basically bedridden and so we couldn't shoot. I was like,

Lois has cancer. I was like, I said, you know, let's write it into the show. Let's make it, we'll put her in a, you know, we'll shoot a lot of her stuff early. We'll just sort of bank as much as we can with her. And,

and then, and just sort of make, make it up. What, what's, how does this work between a Kryptonian and a human? Blah, blah, Which is crazy.

Like nowadays would all be AI. Oh God. Just, you're walking around, not even pregnant. Deep fake. Yeah. And everything like that's so much simpler nowadays.

Back then, that's a real fucking problem. That was a real fucking problem. And that's film. You filmed on film. Film. Which is crazy because that is, hey, action. Nail your fucking line because we're not just doing line, line, line, line, line, line.

You can't do that. We never did that. No, God no. Never, never, never. Burning film. Oh, yeah. And you wanted quick sticks to get a go because you only had so much film. And if it was a longer take, the whole magazine is there.

So it was a whole thing. Sometimes you get it all ready and we go. And all of a sudden, the mag would be like, all right. And the guys are smacking it on the outside. Pap, pap. If it doesn't work, then they're like, change the mag. We're down for five, ten minutes every single time. Were you doing everything?

It's fucking crazy. Dude, I forgot. then they're like i change them back we're down for five ten minutes every single time were you doing everything crazy dude i forgot like so she she was down and you were arguing like why don't we just shoot the season like this i'm just like yeah i was like i was ready to do it because i was prepared for season five and it's i mean it it's too much it really is too much for like to have any work-life balance or anything like that doesn't exist it just doesn't exist so i'm single though i got nothing a couple dogs at home running around they're running around without me you know all day long but i would leave a minimum 18 hours later i'd be home and my mom's like honey you know you're doing this it's like when we when we see you this is how my mom talks uh when we see you you're like you're you're just like you're so

quick and i go my i got 15. I got like 15 minutes here. If I don't do this, I can't flip the weekend around and I can't get up. Oh, you know, and I was like, it's a pain in the ass. Everyone, if they wanted to see me, had to come to set. You never saw me anywhere else. I was never anywhere else. I hope my mom is listening to this part right now. This is part of the deal, mom.

That's what makes it a pain in the ass. And it's too much. I won't do a series. So what happened is my son was born in 2000. I'm a single dad. mom that's what makes it a pain in the ass and it's it's too much so i won't do a series so what happened is my son was born in 2000 um i'm a single dad and his mom and i fought over custody because she wanted to go back to there's that that's that's a whole nother show um that is can that is i will do that i want my lawyer here and i want um we uh we ended up in a really nasty custody battle and so on and so forth but um that changed everything for me because now I got a kid.

And I, again, being adopted, I knew that if my dad wasn't around, I look at all the hardest points in time in my life, my dad was always there. Like my dad's my hero. I mean, there's no question. My dad's 80 years old now. He is just awesome. And, you know, it's funny because he's five, I don't know, what is he now? Five, seven, dad?

He was five, nine. You get smaller. He's 80 years old. And my dad's a stud. He's a cowboy. Like I said, he directed Young Guns. That was then, this is now, The Principal, all these different things. What was his name again?

Christopher Kane. Still is. Christopher Kane, okay. Damn it. No, no no i'm not i'm kidding he's still not that he's dead i'm just no that's my son's name too so i named my god rest his soul like young guns was one of the movies that like my dad made me sit down and watch as a kid

fucking watch this movie and i'm glad he did it's a great movie it's a great movie but you know i remember the day my dad i'd come back from college my dad'd be like read this script tell me what you think he was always trying to make me a writer and i did i wrote episodes of lois and clark i still i've written 40 scripts i've written tons and i love it and early on in my career playing superman my dad even said he goes you can act for the rest of your life. You'll never be as good an actor as you are a writer right now. I was like, so I should stop acting? What do you want to do?

He's like, because I suck? What kind of riddle is this? I don't know what this means. It's hard to make money as a writer, though, because selling them and doing the things is a pain in the ass. But what was my point what was my point oh so he'd give me these scripts and be like read this tell me this and i would read the script and because all these kids i grew up with he's like do you think emilio can play billy the kid and i was like yeah and this script for sure for his i remember he was just like okay but then then i go

back to school fucking emilio's playing bill the Kid. I was like, oh, wow. And then he'd be doing these things while it was going on. And it was fun. But I thought everybody's dad did that. Because I didn't know any better. I had never been out of Malibu. It's like John or any of our kids. They're just like, bro.

And the book that John's going to write? No, we haven't told Dean about the seven retarded uncles. What? Like the seven retarded uncles. What? Like the seven samurai? Yeah. So my son is way less cool. We don't save the town. All right.

No, my son's 15 years old now, and I've raised him pretty much by myself. I've had full custody since he was two years old. Wow. So he's grown up around me, brandon eli like our friend group so he's he's retarded no he's gonna write i'm just kidding yes it was right there it's so easy that was for you john oh he's retarded but we're coming back on the podcast man i'm not leaving we're staying here we talked about he's gonna write a tell-all book one day called my seven retarded uncles we just talked about the that he grew up on it's like here's what they did today that's pretty much the best book ever though that's the best it's gonna be a tell-all we just gotta make sure that

we've all made our money before that because when that boat comes out, we're fucked. Uh-uh. The pendulum will have swung all the way the other way. I was just like, fucking you. Superman landing, seeing John, you're like, you're retarded and flying away. Superman lands, calls him retarded, kisses the twink on his back and flies away. Otherwise he couldn't fly away.

We know that. John's just confused. What the fuck, man. John's just confused. John's getting robbed. Do you understand why I didn't win? No. I'm so confused. I think you should.

And you still might. As it turns out, plenty of people still clutch their pearls, pretending like men don't talk like this. It's so stupid. It's so stupid. Everybody talks like this. Like I said, if you heard my best friends and I talking to each other, you'd think we hated each other. One's Iranian. One's black.

I'm Japanese. I mean, the Japanese. I never met my biological father, right? So my friends will literally be sitting around having something to eat, whatever. asian dude walks by it's like dude dude dude is that your dad did i'm like he's chinese my dad was japanese he's like aren't that that's the same thing right i'm like no it's not the same thing not the same thing but not if nan king has something to say now we're talking history I know very well Nanking was rough I think that was the definition

of rough I wasn't there you can't prove anything in the middle of what you see now you're pulling me into this fucking lore I was in the middle of the whole old Nanking picture and there's a superman with a little twink on his back that's jacked up I'm out of here pulling me into this fucking lore. I was in the middle of the whole like old Nanking picture and there's just Superman with a little twink on his back.

That's jacked up. I'm out of here. That's the part that's jacked up. Superman flying away is the problem. That's the line. I understand. I love that you're a single father. Being a single father.

My son, I've had full custody of since he was nine. He's my best friend. He's my favorite person in the world. But he's not the same as me. We're similar. I love team sports. He likes individual sports. Like what?

Fighting. He likes fighting. He likes jiu-jitsu things like that you know he plays bring him down here man oh he'd love it he's got he the last time he fought though um he didn't what he like now he's six six two six three like two two 15 i think now he is and he's just last time i remember like he talked about jesus christ i was like well fighting you're. I was like, well, fighting, you're like, okay, well, how big are you fighting? Okay, you're in the 215, you're heavyweight. You're fighting the big boys that hit really hard.

But he wasn't, when he was doing the jujitsu tournaments, I remember him being, you know, 17 instead of 24, and he was maybe like 174. Now he's 215. He's 24 now. God, he's four years younger than Brandon. maybe like 174. He's 24 now. He's four years younger than Brandon. Wild thought. Thanks, Eli, for making me feel like an infant.

A child. Hold him. I don't want to be the twink on your back, dude. I almost flew out of here. I almost got there. Climb on your back, dude. I almost flew out of here. I almost got there. Climb on my back, Brandon. I was this close. I was this close. Papa.

Time to end the podcast. We got completely off the rails. We always do that. There was a yes and a no i sort of there was a sort of yeah okay to be expected this is yeah we just we're fucking we get there what kind so you're here for comic-con you have well the san antonio i don't even know it's a huge con actually there's like i think like jake gyllenhaal all kinds of folks are like what do you think so do you enjoy the Comic-Con stuff? Is this on air? Is this live?

Oh, fuck. We can take it out. No, Comic-Cons are really cool because, you know, especially when you're shooting a show like Lois and Clark, you go and you do this work and you're there, but you don't have any other life outside of it. You're there 15, 18, 20 hours. We shot 22 hours one day. On set, we're filmed for 22 hours.

You're just burnt. There's nothing else. And people aren't there going, oh, I like the show. Because you don't see anybody. And then the show airs. And this is the fledgling internet. So you kind of get some feedback. There's no social media.

There's none of that shit. The professional reviewers is all you get. You get that. And then you get your ratings. And that's what you really give a shit about. Because you stay on the air if you get the ratings. So you don't get any feedback. I don't know 10 to 15 years ago i started going to comic cons guys like you know you go to these comic cons and you mean like a star trek thing

they're like no no you go for everything excuse me and i was like all right and i met people who grew up watching the show and then they would say like my my dad and i would sit and watch this you know i'd be able to stay up late on sunday night and watch this before monday school is only the show i could stay up late for and i was having a bad relationship with my dad you get these stories about how the show affected people you're like holy shit you know that's amazing because i do with my son i know the shows that we would watch. My son meets everybody famous in the world, politicians, world leaders, actors, people. He could give a shit. He doesn't care at all.

But then now it's a show that he watched when he was growing up. And he's like, I love that show. Oh, that's so-and-so. And I'm like, you like that show? You've never even watched my show. He's like, no, it's weird. It's weird watching you do it.

I'm like, whatever. But I see how that affects him. Like Friday Night Lights we'd watch all the time. And he loved that and thought Kyle Chandler was hysterical. He's like, he gets mad like you do. I was like, shut up and go to your room. So that was the thing. He would do that, though.

And then I was like, Kyle was in Pure country that your grandfather directed with George Strait. Yeah. My dad directed that as well. That was one of like, all right, weird fucking moment. That was one of like three movies I had on my iPod Gen 3. It was pure country with George Strait. It's a good movie. It's a great fucking movie.

I rewrote that damn script in six days. I'm just going to say. You're shitting me. No. The whole bit about like the difference between the white speck on the top of chicken shit that's my dad that's his farmer humor i call it farm wisdom and the tree and the roots and the roots aren't i'm like jeez dad what are you getting there he's like just write it that's why a small fucking world yeah but that's my dad um what was my point i forget oh my son grows up in up in this world with all this stuff going on.

Real quick, for those who didn't know, the white speck on the top of chicken shit is chicken shit, too. It's just his white speck. It's the same damn thing. It's just chicken shit. I felt like I was leaving him hanging on that one. They're waiting. I like how you hang him like that. It's interesting. So my son grew up with all this folks around him.

But then we started enjoying certain shows together. And he's like, oh, I love that guy. What about that show? And I'm like, oh, all right. Well, then he'd be excited to meet that person. I'm like, you never want to meet anybody. You don't care. But he does care when it's something that affected him.

And we would stop Friday Night Lights and be like, you know why he's going through this right now? Because of blah, blah, blah. And just because your friend says that, and we'd go through life rules and lessons and things. And when people tell me stuff like that about Lois and Clark, which is when I started going to Comic-Cons, it's awesome. You go, wow. I never thought you'd like to hope that would happen

and someone would be inspired by something. But when it happens, you're like, it's really humbling. It's a cool. So people like come up to you in person, like after 17 Miller lights, my dad would watch you on TV. I think I could beat anybody, including my wife. No, I never got that one. Thank God. Thank God.

No, it was. But it's a great man. Oh, God. Love us now. He's fist. Oh, God. Love us now. Daddy's fist is kryptonite. I was always worried that that was going to happen when I was out and about when you're playing Superman. I mean, I got fan mail saying, like, I need groceries, do this, that, blah, blah. At the same time, you'd think somebody would be like, you know, I'm going to shoot Superman and see if it bounces off him or whatever. It's something to be concerned about because people are

a little... Well, somebody reads Catcher in the Rye and decides to test you in public. There it is. It's 100% true. And so that was a fear for a long time and then... That's crazy. That's a thing because that is... Yeah. Well, you think you're... It's still... Imagine you're Demetrius Johnson and somebody knows

you ain't so tough, man. You ain't so tough. What's he going to do? He's Demetrius johnson he can't just knock him out he won't he can yeah very much so but if he does that people just being crazy that's what's crazy about it it is how something especially the superman thing that'd be absolutely terrifying where it's like oh here's a gun let's see yeah uh-huh be tough guy now hey oh especially with the younger fan base where's my twink come here now shoot now shoot oh he hit my twink then i burn him like homeland homeland that shit but that it's a legitimate concern but the thing about being a you know a

single dad is uh like i said like my son is my favorite like i stopped i wouldn't do a series i wouldn't star in a series i would do it if i was on an ensemble i changed my whole career because i don't know what your situation was but i got into a really very very expensive custody battle and in california they have a thing they it's not called the california equal footing law but it is in effect um because i could afford any attorney therefore so could she and i have to pay for it i mean i remember spending forty thousand dollars to to audit my own books so they could find out how much cash i had on hand because they ordered it that's how i did so as much as you were spending on the battle,

she could also spend from your pocket. Exactly. Yeah. What kind of fucked up shit is that? California. California foot and law. Yeah. It was not set up.

Trout's smiling right now. He's so happy about this rule. It was insane. It was insane. Insane shit I've never heard in my life. I spent $1.5 million in legal fees to win joint custody of my son. Because you know men were already at a massive advantage for custody battles. Exactly.

There was a thing they called the tender years clause, which wasn't supposed to come into effect, which is that the mother is breastfeeding for the first 18 months. You can't share custody because she's breastfeeding. Well, his mom stopped breastfeeding after five months. That's out. I'm there. She didn breastfeeding after five months. That's out. I'm there. She didn't want me to have. She was mad.

Whatever. She's hell hath no fury like a woman, right? That's the score. A woman like a woman scorned. It's times five if it's a Latina. You specifically left out the scorned part. I couldn't get there. Like a woman.

That's the white claw. It's just women in general. No, I'm kidding. I'm not bitter. It was an awful thing, though, because I also knew there's no way I couldn't be in this kid's life because of what I went through. I remember at the time, I remember we were almost leaving Princeton just going, this is bullshit. I don't want to play here. I'll go take a full ride at UCLA, which I work out with.

I'm out there with Troy Aikman and Flipper Anderson, these guys running around. And these are great players. And I'm like, and Ken Norton Jr. And I'm like, I should fucking play here. They treat these guys with huge respect. And they're loved and blah, blah. And I'm in Southern California.

The weather's great. I'm at Princeton. The weather sucks. And my Soviet politics professor called me a Neanderthal because I'm a football player. I was like, this is stupid. I'm sick of this crap. I'm just going to go back. And my dad's like slow down big boy he's like whoa whoa whoa kiss

the twink and relax i was like i was like that's our next shirt kiss the twink and relax twink on the back he would give me the farm advice you know the same thing about the speck of white that's still chicken shit we go through that stuff and he mean this is literally like the the new man of steel kind of shit like growing up on a midwest farm like your father's just like fucking like they're trying to get you to relax a bit a hundred percent and he did he did and and i just knew how there's time you know there's a we all have those moments where you're about to go off the rails or something you're about to do something really stupid you get close and and you know your dad probably sees it and your behavior and the things you know like listen buddy

you're going down the wrong road you better clean your shit up i remember he had other ways of doing it too weren't so subtle uh it was the fourth of july and my buddy and i went over to the the principal of our high school's daughters has the principal wasn't there, but the daughters were all there. We stayed up there a little bit too late. We had a couple of drinks and we were underage. And my curfew was 10 o'clock and it was 1130. We were laughing, coming down the street. We had a really long driveway that went down to the top, all the way down to the bottom of that, to where the house was. And we're laughing because I got a long way to go for a thousand. We're late. All right, I'm going to get yelled at. They're having a party and maybe they won't even notice and we hit up the top and there's my dad standing at the top

of the of the driveway i was like oh fuck and he's like get your ass downstairs that's exactly what through and he goes get your get your ass downstairs and i was like my buddy's idiot he shouldn't have spoken he's like we only had one beer my dad's like shut up get your ass out i was like oh god don't do it and then every and then my dad we walked by my dad that's where he wanted us to go and then every like third step he would kick me in the ass and he would just that was it that's the that was the that was what i got going down there for that was not such subtle advice, but he was so pissed off. And then my uncle Mark was inside the house, my mom's little brother.

And when I walked by, he did exactly that. He was like, and my dad kept kicking me in the ass all the way into my room. Just kept kicking me in the ass. I got the message. Don't break curfew and don't drink with the principal's daughters when you're underage.

I, you know, you got to get it through your thick head, but he was, but he was there for everything all the time. All the hardest times that it's that footprints in the sand thing. You know, you've heard that about, you know, God, why have you forsaken me in the hardest points of my life? I looked down, you said, you'd be walking next to me. I look at the hardest points and there's just one set of footprints. And that's when God said, that's because when I, that's when I was carrying you. And that's the thing is my dad did that over

and over and over. So there's no way I wasn't going to do that for my son. Yeah. And he's had, he's had his, he's had things happen that I would have never expected and things that I, if I didn't have that built into me, I wouldn't have been there. So I would doing it as a single father,

huge respect. It's a, it's a very difficult thing. John turned out dope cody did a fantastic job which is such a good fucking kid dude it's crazy seeing like that levels it's crazy seeing how good john is how well behaved because it is an undertaking and then it's like you see this kid's just well behaved smart like fuck dude not only is he well behaved and smart he's also like his sense of

humor is unfortunately honed by us oh so that that kid's gonna make he's gonna be like me where like he makes a lot of jokes in high school that don't go over well because they're not ready for it he's not now not in this day and age no it's crazy but it's awesome because you just get to see like what a good dad can do and you're like hey as it fucking should be yep yep but i've had you know it was even through college i was having you know issues here then after college and you're making that adjustment he was there again so it doesn't stop it's not gonna stop but it you know and now it flips down i'm right you know i i for the last i don't know 30 years, I've become the head of the family.

And that's a weird transition. Check yourself on what you're thinking, what you do. I think we discussed it the other day. It's any type of leadership role, a fatherhood or whatever, where you have to doubt yourself. You're like, am I making the right decision? I have to question that. Okay. If you're a good one, you question those decisions and then you're like,

okay, it is the right one. And sometimes you make a mistake. Yeah. Oh yeah. And then you own that mistake. You're like, I'm fucked up.

I'm sorry. You know? Yeah. I didn't mean this or whatever. Maybe, you know, like your voice gets a little too, you know,

too strong and, you know, realize that you, what you could, the effect you can have on a child. And you're like, oh my gosh, I was like, I told you not to do that. And then you say it and all of a sudden they start crying, what you could, the, the effect you can have on a child. And you're like, Oh my gosh, I was like,

I told you not to do that. And then you say it. And all of a sudden they start crying. You're like, wow, it took a lot. Like my son's emotional guy, but it takes a lot to get him there for him to break out when you do it. Then you're like, shit, did I go a little too hard? It was, I mean, we all have been there and I know sometimes I've gone too hard. And then there's the guilt factor afterward. And you, but I remember what my dad used to do when I get, get all that shit.

First of all, back in the day, you guys don't remember it. Of course you don't remember it. There was a thing. There was a show called Wait Till Your Father Gets Home. Wait till your father gets. No, nobody's going to sing it with me. Okay. It was a cartoon.

But it was like she would say. Yes, Dean Cain. Let's all sing together. The kid would screw up. And then the mom would. Follow the bouncing. And the thing was you went to your

father-in-law's house and you'd get in trouble and you'd get busted for the whole thing and blah, blah, blah. I remember like my dad would come back and this dude,

my dad did everything. Before he was a director, he was like doing anything to make things. He'll do anything to, you know, take care of the family. But when I got busted,

it was the belt. Yeah. The belt would come off. He swears to this day he only hit me with the belt one time. He's a liar. I love you, Dad, but you lie. I know I got it a couple of times. My brother was two years older than me. He was like, one time I did something really stupid.

I thought, I didn't realize I was doing whatever. As a kid, we have rose-colored glasses. Like, oh, yeah, no. My childhood was great. Like, parents have the same thing. we have rose-colored glasses. Like, oh, yeah, no. My childhood was great. Like, parents have the same thing. Like, I never hit you. Like, you hit the belt. As a kid, you remember that shit.

I remember it was so much trouble. I was like, oh, shit, this is a real one. And I go home. My brother, when I walk up, my brother's like. And then he goes, put on extra pairs of underwear. I swear it helps. I was like, oh, whatever. This is going to fucking suck suck I didn't get the belt

that day by the way thank god you are not an honorable man that's that and he was right but it's it helps it's the greatest thing in the world I don't know it's the best thing in the world but kids don't realize that your parents aren't

superhuman. They're just as stupid as you are and trying to figure this crap out. And, you know, my dad used to always, after something happened, though, he'd do it,

whatever would happen. I get the discipline, whether it's a spanking or belt or whatever it was. And, uh, 10, 15 minutes later, and I knew he was going to come back in.

I mean, you explained to me why he did it and that he hated doing it. And that, you know, he loved me and this is the deal so that was worth everything to me so every time i've ever disciplined my son i'm back in there it's the talk afterwards you love stew and then you talk yep 100 it's huge huge that even hurts to hear because like you you know for a fact it's you know the whole thing like you you you realize that your parents are just you and then like that is a serious moment in growing up you just realize fuck like especially i can only imagine because i'm just now coming into the role of like looking to be a parent and then you start looking back on all these interactions you're like shit that's a

whole level deeper oh yeah it is oh man you'd think it's a whole level deeper. Oh, yeah, it is. Oh, man. You'd think it's a short little word. Just I'll be there in 15 minutes. Then you just you just like you just crushed somebody without even realizing that because you got 65 other things going on here. And you're trying to then you look back and you see your kid like in tears. You know, what the fuck? What? You know, you got to harden up.

You're like, then you're like even worse. And you're like, what am I doing? I'm so sorry. I don't know. You have to. Oh, you're it. It never stops. It never like, then you're like even worse. And you're like, what am I doing? I'm so sorry. I don't know. You have to, it's, Oh, you're, it never stops.

It never stops. That's part of the circle, but deep. Everyone out there is like, damn, I need to be a better dad. Right. And it's like,

I do not care. Father, I want you to play video games. I'm going to go by daddy. My son is very cut and dry. Just autistic. Oh yeah. Hey,

right. And I'll be home and I'll be home in three hours 49 hours later oh hey daddy how are you i want to play video games now daddy goodbye that's pretty straight wow dude i had him you talk about your son like you need like a fucking hamster feeder and that's it right it's just very straightforward on everything i had him at sunday thank you message we didn't play that You'd be thankful I was like hey buddy

Did we not play that? Not the thank you message I text baby mama Hey can you just have Ryan send a thank you message Just record it horizontal real quick Just saying thank you to everyone I was like oh my god Because Ryan's like

He's very good at some things and then when you're telling him instructions on how to emote it comes off like a serial killer so writing's like thank you everyone i really like the messages he like just makes executive decision like let's not put that it was the fastest like we're good I'll actually just play it for you guys because it's fucking hilarious like he's like

I'm not laughing that looked like a laugh why are you laughing? Oh, my new subscribers. Okay. I can't say it. Okay, okay, okay. I'm done. I'm fucking done.

Ryan's like, I don't want to be here. I'm like, oh, that's it. Genuine emotion? Ryan fucking kills. It's like if I'm just recording and we're doing something, I try to just so he doesn't even know the camera. He doesn't expect it. But if the fucking camera's on him, he's hello daddy what are you doing i'm like stop stop it stop looking at the camera like that i've seen actors do that i've seen actors freeze up on the because there's a lot of heat when you're stepping on to act in a on a huge set and a big thing especially

back in the day when there was no you didn't get get to practice. Like everyone practices in front of the camera. We talk once a week – I mean multiple times a week for you guys and then like once a week for the podcast. But you get so comfortable in front of the camera. When you're thrown into that shit and you're like, hey, you got to know your lines. And say these lines, not what you want to say. Say these lines. Oh, I've seen people just – you're like, oh, oh. We're like, oh, okay, we're going're gonna slow it down i mean like you know i'm

stepping up against like denzel washington and things like but i knew what i was doing but i was just like oh shit i don't and he'll eat you up on screen and he's my favorite actor of all time so he's fucking yeah did you work with him on yeah i started opposite him on the movie called out of time where i played the bad guy and there's a scene where he's sleeping with my wife and I've figured it out. And I meet up in a bar. At least he didn't touch a twink. He didn't know. He couldn't see the twink.

The twink goes invisible. Oh, I see. I'll have to re-watch that movie. I come into the bar and he's been sleeping with my wife. And I tell him, I come in. I'm like, he's the chief of police too. In this little him I come in. I'm like, you know, he's the chief of police too in this little sleepy Florida town, and I'm like, you know, I came back, and I thought somebody was with her and blah, blah, blah,

and he's like, oh, really? And I'm like, you know, yeah, and then the guy's, you know, I forget what the word was, squirted out there, scuttled out the back or whatever, you know, when I got home, the little bitch scurried out the back door. He's like, oh, scurry, did he? And I'm like, yeah as if i had to come in there and seen him i mean i'd have fucking killed him and he's like really no as a chief police you can't and we're having this conversation where basically i'm saying i know you're fucking my wife and i'm gonna kill you if you do it again and that but i don't say those words i say everything else and he

and he doesn't he doesn't back down so it was was an awesome scene. It was actually my audition scene for the thing too. And Denzel had just won Best Actor for Training Day. Oh, damn. So on that day, you don't want to fuck it up. And I remember that night before I was trying to sleep. I was like, I'm going to sleep. I can't sleep. I can't sleep.

I got to get some sleep. You're running lines. Oh, my God. I have to act in front of fucking Denzel Washington. With him. Because it's with. Because he will change things up. Because if he sees like if you're like it's like playing tennis with somebody who's better than you.

Like you'll up your game. Or you'll just get crushed. So for us, playing tennis. Yes. We love tennis. Yeah. Anybody who's better than us. For us, it's playing tennis.

It was awesome. If you're not saying to me, what's the matter? You can't get it all in your face. He made me much better by just doing shit all the time, provoking it. It's very cool.

It's like on the roll, almost directing and making you act that and getting the response you wanted to talk. It's unbelievable so i was like wow this guy's he's the is as good as i thought he was and better and i would just shut my mouth and watch him and be respectful because it was incredible but there's like this one point time he's like you know at the end he's like you know you know whatever say you're say hi and my wife's name was ann and the thing he's like you know so i the line was something like you know

give ann my best whatever as i like he's like well give ann i the line was something like you know give ann my best whatever as i like he's like well give ann my best if you can and i was like oh you i just wanted to fucking kill him you know at the time and but that's all right i'm just like you motherfucker for saying that and then the whole thing and then uh you know it was just but it was just awesome working opposite him and that scene i let still it's one of my favorite scenes I've ever been a part of. But he made, I think, $20 million for it. And I think I made less than my mortgage. Weird.

Which, although for California, that's not a – That's $1.7 million. Now, I love living in Nevada. I am up and down happy. I mean, I got a house that's twice the size for millions less. It's insane. There's no state income tax, personal income tax. Corporate taxes are lower, much less regulation, so much more shit you can do.

Oh, yeah. You know, I want to go shoot guns. I just get in my truck and I drive out in the desert 25 minutes and set them up and just shoot targets and they can do whatever I want. And you know, it's, it's just crazy. Cause if you ever wanted to shoot guns and taxes, you could always just drive down here and we'll,

I'm coming down, you know, I'm coming down to gun or two. Yeah. I'd love to. I'd love to. We can talk about guns on the after show. We go into the after show.

Yeah. After show. Great. You need it out. After show is only about 10 minutes long. And then we can go get food? Dinner? I'm done for whatever, man. I gotta go work tomorrow.

This is dinner for me. That's why you eat. I didn't eat shit today. That right there is dinner? Oh yeah, that's crazy. You have three white claws. Dude, you need to eat. Stop it. I have to work tomorrow. Connor's your new twink. Connor, get on his back.

My twink smells like Marlboro Reds. How did you know? You've been one of our favorite guests in a long time. I love it. love it appreciate you coming on man well you know i first you know at first i blasted around was his your your your uh donut operator stuff man thousand percent became a huge fan i've got i've worn your t-shirts in like so many different things like there's a movie that i wrote produced directed that's going to come out and i'm wearing one of your Donut Operator t-shirts, one with the donut here, the pink donut.

And everyone's like, what is that? I'm like, what do you mean? What is it? I get a million questions. But I wore it in the movie for, I don't know, several scenes. And I'm coaching soccer for little 12-year-old girls. What's the movie called? It's called Little Angels.

It's great. It's the Mighty Ducks, basically. But it's a college football coach who gets busted for saying, in the national championship game, game's over. We've got the win. We scored another touchdown. Sends in a girl kicker to kick the point after. And she danks it off the upright.

And he's like, it was a publicity stunt. She's a soccer player. She's a woman. She sucks. She shouldn't have been out there. You know, we're in America. Soccer's for girls. Boom. Busted. He has to sit out for a whole year, go through

sensitivity training and do community service, which was coaching girls soccer. Then he starts coaching them. He gets the loser team, of course. And then he starts to coach them. And then he starts to like them. Then he starts to really care about them. He has to either coach the national championship football game because he gets he goes through all this stuff and gets done or coach the girls championship he's been teaching

them team and teamwork and all this i've got a great idea for a sequel come on all right you don't even know how the first one ended oh i i you already know the girls, right? Of course. He's like, beast out, bitches. And then they won the championship. Five million bucks. My idea, it's just kind of like First Blood is like a very genuine, heartfelt fucking like veteran sympathy movie. First Blood Part 2, you come back with a fucking team full of transgender male soccer players and dominate

the field. Just wipe the field. Disney would buy that, dude. That's what I'm saying. You see some of the stuff that came out today by Disney and some Disney workers on just that. Would not hire a white guy for something.

I forgot exactly what it was. I was like, whoa. Yeah. Wow. It was some project. That's when I pull my Japanese-ness out yeah my name is Takada Tanaka Tanaka actually my really close some of my good friends will call me Tanaka you know they're like there was gangster name yeah it is a gangster name that was that Vader gangster James Bond guy Tanaka all right moving to the after show guys thank you so much for coming to the unsubscribed podcast i was joined today by eli double tap the amazing dean kane brandon herrera and myself donut operator as i said check out the after podcast on patreon

and mr dean kate where can we find your shit? Let's see. On X, at Real Dean Cain. Please don't do that, Alex. Please, never do that. Don't do that. Welcome to X. Oh, God.

He likes kissing the twigs. Who doesn't? Who doesn't? And on Instagram, and then he likes kissing the twins and on instagram uh what is it oh it's a stupid name uh deuces 1966 because my son made it for me back i'm born in 1966 i know that's fucked up um but yeah 1966 yeah god wasn't that world war ii no it was not world war ii it was after um uh and uh deuces he'd always be like deuces dead because he was young at the time and so i'm deuces 1966 and i will not change it dad i got the coolest handle for you deuces 1966 yep that's what it is on instagram that's it boom i'm on nothing else check them out and then go hang out with after show we talk about i don't know yet we'll talk about girls guns and girls i

can't wait and twinks bye We'll see you again. You don't know my name. We'll see you again. You don't know my name.