Unsubscribe Podcast - 178 - Fire Bats, WW2 & The Fat Electrician Vs History Of Everything | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 178

Episode Date: September 24, 2024

Stakuyi from the  @historyofeverythingpodcast  is here to nerd out with the boys on all things history, with a special appearance from our boy  @king_trout ! Watch this episode ad-free and uncensored on Pepperbox! https://www.pepperbox.tv/ WATCH THE AFTERSHOW & BTS ON PATREON! https://www.patreon.com/UnsubscribePodcast All live show links will be updated on https://unsubcrew.com this coming week as tickets go live. Keep an eye out! Live Show Links - Nashville https://citywinery.com/nashville/events/unsubscribe-podcast-3rau7g ------------------------------ FOLLOW STAKUYI https://www.youtube.com/@historyofeverythingpodcast https://www.instagram.com/stakuyi/?hl=en https://www.youtube.com/@stakuyi ------------------------------ THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS! GHOSTBED Right now GhostBed is offering 50% off everything if you use the code –UNSUBSCRIBE at checkout or go to https://www.GhostBed.com/Unsubscribe MANSCAPED Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code UNSUB at https://manscaped.com FUM For a limited time, use code UNSUB to get a free gift with your Journey Pack! Head to https://tryfum.com and use code UNSUB ------------------------------ UNSUB MERCH: https://www.bunkerbranding.com/pages/unsubscribe-podcast BUY US A DRINK! https://paypal.me/UnsubscribePodcast ------------------------------ FOLLOW THE HOSTS: Eli_Doubletap https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://www.twitch.tv/Eli_Doubletap https://x.com/Eli_Doubletap https://www.youtube.com/c/EliDoubletap Brandon Herrera https://www.youtube.com/@BrandonHerrera https://x.com/TheAKGuy https://www.instagram.com/realbrandonherrera Donut Operator https://www.youtube.com/@DonutOperator https://x.com/DonutOperator https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator The Fat Electrician https://www.youtube.com/@the_fat_electrician https://thefatelectrician.com/ https://www.instagram.com/the_fat_electrician https://www.tiktok.com/@the_fat_electrician ------------------------------ unsubscribe pod podcast episode ep unsub funny comedy military army comedian texas podcasts #podcast #comedy #funnypodcast #military history Chapters: 0:00 Welcome To Unsub! 0:17 NEW LIVE SHOWS ARE COMING! 1:23 Welcome To Unsub! 5:56 Chinese Bird Drones 7:37 The Chinese Knockoff MK 19 14:07 AD 15:15 Japan’s Article 9 20:01 Japanese Honor 22:02 Japanese & Korean Culture 26:03 Emperor Hirohito 30:36 The Crusades 33:27 The Atomic Bombs & Japanese Surrender 36:32 The Mongols 40:21 AD 41:26 The Mongols 42:21 Hirohito & Japan’s Surrender 50:48 Bat Bombs 54:22 Soviets Hate Dogs 58:32 The Underwear Jars 1:01:35 Drunk Stakuyi 1:05:56 Bat Bombs 1:07:10 AD 1:08:24 Bat Bombs 1:13:00 Nic’s Fans 1:14:25 Nic’s Boops 1:19:05 The History Of Everything 1:25:12 Medieval History 1:35:00 Crossbows & Nic’s Sniper Video 1:38:46 The Mongols Vs Russia 1:48:13 The Offenders Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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If you have questions or concerns about gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge then mgm operates pursuant to an operating agreement with i-gaming ontario they cooked the dog alive they cooked the dog they were asking for it dude here's the thing about here oh we're gonna fight oh i love this what are you doing steph nomad does your wife know you're autistic i have to ask. What the did we get here? What's up everyone? We have an announcement to make for you all. I'm pregnant. It's my baby.

Just kidding. We're actually doing a whole new round of live shows. He's not kidding. It's my baby. We are doing seven shows across the United States. We're coming everywhere. November 14th, Nashville, Tennessee at the Winery Theater. November 15th at the Norfolk, not Norfolk, Virginia Addicts Theater. November 16th in San Diego, California at the Observatory North Park.

November 17th in Dallas at the Granada Theater. Ooh, me, Kenny, and Rich were there. That was our favorite last time. December 4th in Atlanta, Georgia at the Variety Theater. Ooh, me, Kenny, and Rich were there. That was our favorite last time. December 4th in Atlanta, Georgia at the Variety Playhouse. December 5th at the Wilbur Theater in Boston. December 6th in Buffalo, New York at Asbury Hall. And every show will have two guests, and we're really looking forward to it. Seriously, if you missed last time, it is a blast. It was a pleasure hanging out with you guys last time.

We appreciate our audience so much, and we are looking forward to seeing you again go check out the links below we'll provide them in the youtube description or wherever i'm pointing and good luck quack bang out hi everyone welcome to the unsubscribed podcast i'm joined with by eli double tap the fat electrician, Stephen, of the History of Everything podcast and myself, King Trout. King Donut. King Donut. Donut. Donut. King Trout Operator.

Trout Operator. Wow. You guys are like, where the f***? What the f*** happened? What's going on? The other boys had work to do. Brandon had to serve his military. He was in a mission of some kind.

And Cody had to do police content. And now we're going to pop these topics. to serve his military. He was in a mission of some kind. And Cody had to do police content. And now we're going to pop these. Wait, fuck! We did it backwards again. Oh, it's fine. Did I pull full Cody and do it backwards? Wait, does he need one? No, I opened all of mine.

So we just need to count down on the countdown and then we pop it the same times. Three, two, one. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the Unsubscribe podcast. Once again, I'm joined by Elon DoubleTap, the fan electrician, Stephen of the History of Everything podcast, and I'm Donut Operator. Did you do that twice, or am I that fucked up? No, you did.

This is a different kind of DoubleT tap that we're doing right now. He literally did it twice, which is even better because it all stays in the episode. Anyway. Steven, if you think we're cutting that, we're not. We're not. No, I get it. It's fine. Hi.

Dude, this is going to be a history heavy. Welcome to Learning by CBS. We're excited for you to have this journey together. We're going to talk to have this journey together. We're going to talk about communism, war, fish, and psyops. Your camp counselor touching you. Whatever comes up. Okay, listen, we're not talking about the repressed history at this point. We're talking about the normal stuff.

Yeah, exactly. That's a great name for a about the repressed history at this point yeah exactly that's a great name for a podcast repressed history it's actually a really solid fucking i'd steal that before someone else does you start out with and frank and then just get progressively more depressed this is the high point of this podcast episode one the tuskegee experiments oh god gets into psyops and like theoretical physics i did not see it has a huge following though very loyal and autistic it's great hi dude welcome to texas i know you're in for a have you watched how much of the content have you watched okay i've never seen a full episode i've seen clips everywhere across because i do a lot of stuff with tiktok short content that kind of thing so i will consistently just be scrolling through and they'll just be random clips and it's usually

usually you going on a rant about communism that is one of the most common ones that we'll see and then there will be other things with guests that i'll see that pop up but that is easily the most common one that pops up every time i call those the low lights why the editor likes to capture me at my most unhinged and be like you know what this will sell it to everybody as normal content that they'd enjoy just like where i need the most understanding and compassion of like oh he's been drinking and gotten wound up for two and a half hours straight before no just that's how he is all the time peak It's the impression that it gives off. It does well. Same for Trout.

Is that why you wore your fucking commie watch today? I think I didn't notice. The first thing I sat down for breakfast. What makes it a commie watch? It's made by communists. It literally was for communist China. It has the red star. It is China's single 1963.

China sent a Chinese guy to Switzerland. So this is cultural revolution. Yeah. Oh, nice. It's a chronograph, which actually, if you don't know a lot about watches, means that it's an automatic watch. So it recharges itself automatically as long as you're moving, provided. And then it's got a chronograph, which is basically a stopwatch. So you could track how long it's been since you've been starving your innocent civilians to death with your shitty ideology but there's only second increments there's no way they could calculate no seconds they don't live that long the bullets get them before the hunger i

don't know if you guys have noticed but the sparrows have been eating a lot of seeds and i don't like them get rid of the sparrows little do they know i'm an immigrant hey eli did you sign a waiver before we came in here you think fares have waivers remember me john that's a pop you'll get those from time to time i'm just trying to light a fucking cigarette bro side note did you see the fucking birds uh china the u.s uh china military chinese bird drones yeah dude those are terrifying yes and they're i've seen stuff for it yes yeah with the chinese special forces guys rip it up on fucking razor scooters yep they're like yep i forgot about that yeah because my first thought i saw that full video they throw the bird drone and then they like rip it up on fucking razor scooters and i was like i can't wait to blast some chinese nerd on a scooter i'm not happy about world war three it's gonna happen but just skeet shooting from the back of

an electric shooter with a shotgun don't trust the birds the birds aren't real i'm glad we didn't have those or the segues during patrols it would have been nice don't get me wrong not having to walk during a patrol but god you are not a feared individual just an iraqi why do they say that every time? No, I'm cool. I'm very cool. The most powerful military in the world. No, you're gay. Just dismounting the striker and segways.

Like the fucking hatch drops. Wee. Oh, I thought that was going to be way harder. No, no. On the back of each one, it's got the little turret from Portal. Have you ever seen that here? It just immediately aims at the top and just starts shooting like a Navy turret. I'm just like, oh, shit!

The D-Day landing from Saving Private Ryan where the guy picks up his arm and tries to put it back on, but he has to back up on a Segway. It's missing a wheel mouse. He's trying to lean to the side and back up at the same time. John Segway hit a mine. survived i love chinese propaganda oh my god speaking of segways the amount of times that i have been sent the fucking chinese knockoff of the uh mark 19 it's a grenade launcher but it's like a sniper rifle instead of a machine gun. And everybody's like, oh, this is terror. Have you ever seen it? The Chinese have a fuck.

It's a grenade launcher, but it's a sniper rifle. Hold on. Before the fuck you continue. Before the fuck you continue. Are the Chinese expecting to just yell Kobe and yeet that shit from like halfway across the stadium? I swear to God. Yeah, that's their strategy. It's the dumbest thing I've ever seen in my life.

Why not just fucking use a mortar? You basically made a mortar on a sniper rifle what is the point this is my point yes exactly it's they want to look scary but they know that they don't have the logistical capacity to make enough grenades to have a grenade machine gun so they're like we'll make a sniper rifle instead we'll make the grenades count because two things that should never go together. Grenade sniper rifle, precision instrument, fucking grenade. No. What is this?

A cod build. Have you ever do it? So it's got so much recoil when they fire it, the fucking scope. They had to put the scope on a shock because it was breaking. No, because they had originally, they had this,

it would recoil and 80 pound they had originally they had this that it would recoil and 80 pound communist trying to operate this fucking thing would get pirated because the scope would punch him in the face so when you watch the dudes shooting it the scope comes and there's like a big uh it looks like the night optics for like a machine gun for like a 240 you know how you have to like push your eye into it and opens it up it looks like that just for recoil so like the scope literally punches these dudes in the face it's hilarious wait what's that okay so if you don't know what a mark 19 is we've talked about it before it is a fully automatic grenade launcher machine gun machine gun machine gun it's the grenade if you ever see a bunch of humvees rolling up and you're like, why is the barrel on that M250

cow a little bit shorter? It's because it's extra spicy. It's the closest thing to Warhammer where you actually have a bolt gun. Where it is an actual bolt gun. They're fun. I have stories I can't tell. I've told you guys about this. Send a warning shot.

Fun! Not good for warning shots well good for warning shots i get the message really quick shooting near something that counts as a warning shot it just so happens the area that it encompasses if they lose a leg it's just a leg they're still alive it was a warning at that point yeah so how what is the max effective range of this fucking thing? It's literally no further than a Mark II, than a Mark XIX. It's like a Mark II, what? Sorry, not a Mark XIX. A Mark XIX, it's no further because it's limited by the grenade, but their excuse is like, oh, it's just more accurate.

You're not going for accuracy with it. The volume of fire is what those were for, just FYI. Unless you have someone who's already in an entrenched, hidden position to fire grenades secretly down into, I don't know, what? An alleyway? Why would you have someone positioned in that position? Exactly. And even then, we barely use, like...

Let's pull it up. Dear God. Holy shit! Yeah. Look at him! You see him punch him in the face? Chase, put this on. I'll get you this video, Chase.

This gun punches this dude in the face. You see his cheek? Like, homie's got a fucking concussion right now. That didn't even hit his eye? That you could see his cheekbone push in and shift as it goes? Like, and he's like oh watch me hit this six foot by six foot target 200 yards away just use a fucking mortar wait is there i want to know what the holdover is or if that's actually shooting that it's not lobbing it wait oh no it's not

lobbing it it's okay that's actually pretty terrifying there's no it's not lobbing like a mark 19 that is just straight like big ass bullet go at target and hit it so you would well you would have to have a direct line of fire which if you were in that situation you could just use a rifle or i mean literally if you yep welcome to my point yeah there's a group of people it's cooler okay that's my point is like yeah is it do i want one fucking kinda is it stupid yes that's the whole point that seems like a that seems like a special weapon that would have been equipped in hell divers right that's like not an actual practical weapon that's like oh we're not actually trying to fight a modern military we're trying to fight giant bugs that is that is what the purpose of that gun is the chinese are super ready for that war

the only hypothetical scenario i can envision where we team up with the funny the funny part is deep somewhere inside whatever the chinese version of the pentagon is the trapezoid whatever the fuck they got going on the Americans are fat we need a we need a really big gun if we go to war with them get the grenade launcher from 40k every single weapon needs to be explosive that's all that it is it's got to be a whole bit of target so big 180 pounds that's Japanese the Japanese accent slightly different from the japanese accent's slightly different from the chinese accent yeah let me hear your best chinese accent easy way to tell generally speaking if they're in the same room one of them has a sword the

other one doesn't have a head never mind sorry it's a good history segue. It's insensitive, but it's not wrong. No physical competition to be more horrible at this point. Was that your segue to the consensual sex of Nanking? That way we don't have to bleep it. YouTube's rules and that's how we stay in it? The Japanese are like, oh we can call it that. That is a stronger name. Oh my god. Did you see how China was addressed?

They were asking for it, dude. Holy shit, that's so bad. It's been 13 minutes. It's just like that. The season is over. Thank you for joining us, everybody. Do you have any bad habits that you need an alternative to? No.

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Or scan the QR code on screen right now to get a free gift with your order today. Anyways, Emperor Hirohito. Oh my God. The man of many chins. Watching your- It's like a Chinese phone book really. Dude, it's crazy watching. Did you watch his latest video on the Chinese?

Sorry. Watching his newest video on the japanese and how much that has that tide has turned from like what they did to nanking to what it is now and they're just like fucked because all the legality and then how they're doing i forget what was that article article nine article nine literally article nine. And just how many restrictions were in place and how that had to change over time. And it's literally just a matter of, if you go back into, say, this is going to sound dumb, Confucian ideology. It's about arguing the exact opposite stances using the same passage over and over again. And that is how legal arguments were done for thousands of years in Asia. So the amount of times that things would be twisted into new meanings or doing something, it's like, ah, yes, this is self-defense, just preemptive that we're doing now.

And that's how it is that Article 9 would change over time to allow the Japanese to remilitarize all in the name of defense oh they need to be able to deploy their troops to this region now to defend beyond the home islands oh now they need to be able to fire if someone is attacking them for defense naturally oh well if someone is attacking their allies we can attack them because if we let our allies get killed that means that we could theoretically in the future be at risk. Therefore, we're defending ourselves hypothetically for a future event. Preemptively. Preemptively.

Yeah, that's like how the animal kingdom's like, I'm going to kill all the young males so they don't get to breed with the women beforehand. What were the Chinese doing that led the Japanese to believe that was the case, that they were preemptively defending themselves? Oh, no, no, no. This is afterwards. So this is the modern justification for why japan is remilitarizing yeah so this is after world war two it was world war two happened and then it was we instilled those rules and then even like tanks tanks crack me up because they don't want a special vehicle it's like they're not allowed to have tanks but they're allowed to have special vehicles so for anyone who's your fucking tanks

explain what a special vehicle is so for anyone who doesn't know this in here it's it's all about literally naming that that is literally all that it is so the word tank in and of itself is something that was specifically created in order to misconstrue or misidentify to make the germans back in world war one think that it was literally just a fucking water tank that is the origin behind tank in the first place but they changed the name here again so that japan does not utilize tanks they use special fighting vehicles sfvs that are tanks but they're not tanks they're special fighting vehicles for the purpose of defense even though legally they're not allowed to have them and that's the whole point i just like they're like oh we're changing the rules right here and it's okay this is the japanese defense force this is the jab the jsdf

yes yeah didn't the legislation just change like a few years ago yes that allowed them to re-militarize is that what you're talking about it did so there have been a number of different changes like as an example it was in 2018 if i recall correctly or 2019 that they issued a bill specifically that put like 50 something trillion yen to go and seven u.s dollars now basically that's the fucking problem so spoiler alert from that video that i put out with it here the whole plan was japan remilitarizing itself even while it's having to increase the age of not conscription, but like for a maximum allowable age for volunteers. It raised by like a full 10 years.

Did you think he was going to say age of consent? We have a problem. Me and Nick are just looking at each other. Whoa! Age of consent. Sorry, they raised the age of conscription. The age of consent for a young man or woman to willingly want to make someone else bleed. Seeing what's going on on YouTube lately, me and Nick just made eye contact.

We were like, what the fuck is this guy about to say? So they increased the age because they have a naturally aging population. It's becoming a very big problem where like 30% of the population, I think at this is above the age of 50 it's it's not good and in fact i'm sustainable i'm pulling out the numbers out of my ass in the first place but it's gotten to a point where the um one of the large the largest increase in crime has been recorded specifically for elderly population in japan from people who are committing crimes to go to jail because like what you'd see with homeless people in the united states they're trying to commit crimes to go to a place where they at least get a like food in a bed this is like the japanese so people the children will not report their dead when a grandparent dies

they will not report it and collect government assist and then old people back in the day and even modern times it's like walk into the woods and do the honorable thing and just fucking die yeah that was normal it's just like you got to age you'll walk out into the woods and do the honorable thing and just fucking die. That was normal. You got too aged, you walked out into the woods, you passed. A more, an even cooler or heroic version of that, though, was after what was the Japanese nuclear meltdown? Wasn't there one? Fukushima.

Fukushima, a bunch of elderly people volunteered to go in and clean up all the radioactive stuff because they figured they'd lived out most of their lives. Do you see the quote from the interview from one of the guys afterwards? The quote, and I shit you not, I am paraphrasing when I say this, but almost

directly it stated, eh, we're not going to live too much longer past this anyway. Might as well give the younger people a chance to do something. And then they just went. Not America we would not do something. And then they just win. America, we would not do that. I hate collectivist societies.

I'm an individualist. My life is the most valuable thing to me. I value myself. Not above all others. I love the people I love. But I'm not going to sacrifice my life for the collective good. Hammer down the fucking nail that's sticking up. If that would have happened in America,

watch me get King Trout pissed off. If that would have happened in America, the biggest issue would have been the boomers upset that they couldn't rent as much housing to all the young people that died to save them. That would have been the entire news cycle. With all the young people dying, the boomers are going to lose their investments.

The rentals now don't have an avocado toast and sealing the nuclear power plant. The rental market is collapsing. We don't have enough buyers. Yeah, no shit, Sherlock. They died. Where did we jump from? From Japanese remilitarization? I was talking about people kicking back to japanese military

welcome to the podcast yeah no i like it that's my favorite thing you know i just kind of feel like china it's getting a little a little spicy you know let let japan off the leash again welcome to toyota-thon you're now west taiwan shut the fuck up bringing out its new fleet of toyota hylux vehicles waterborne division wait till china finds out about japan's new plane the mitsubishi one it's an improvement from their last one with the zero and now we're here dude i didn't know like mitsubishi just makes all they make fucking everything i was like oh so that's their military how familiar are you with Japanese industry or just the industries as a whole?

Because Japan and Korea have a very similar system or had one. You had the Zaibatsu and the Chievo. So essentially what they would do is create super conglomerates where everything would be consolidated under one go to ease whatever you need for manufacturing, for selling, for everything. And that way they would be able to sell well below standard market price to dominate essentially everything no there are like seven super industries and you can just start at late stage capitalism right out of the gate they fucking did it it was government that's interesting yes yeah you're just entered all money. No, I did. I just wanted the joke. The Korean prime minister was like sponsored by LG. Dude, the Korean families are the most crazy shit.

They are. They are. And they're just supposed to marry within the other big families. Like there is no, it's like, oh, I'm rich, you're rich. No, you never. No, yeah. I just brought that up earlier. When you go to get married in Korea, because there are a lot of Kims in Korea, but there are like eight different Kim families, if I'm remembering correctly.

But when you propose marriage in Korea, before you can have your marriage certified by the state, they check your genealogy to make sure that you aren't related within like eight generations or something. Oh, so it's Kentucky. My wife is beyond this here. When we got married, we had to fill out on my wife, cousin. I don't think you're related. Going on a whim, I don't think you guys are related.

For anyone who has not seen my wife or anything here, my wife is Indian and Haitian. She does not look like me at all. Really tan. Yes. So when we got married, we had to fill it. The lady handed us a form.

Oh, what is this for? This is to verify that you two are not related. And I just looked at her and I went, ah, yes. Hello there, cuz. four um this is to verify that you two are not related i just looked at her and i went ah yes hello there cuz you got a lot of the recessive genes no i kid you not for the first couple years that i was dating my wife her mother who's indian by the way i need to stress that she is indian she referred to me as her black son what yeah i i kid you not i don't know why but that is what she is not african american she is she is indian that's what she

referred to me as and so that's i don't know why i never met know why I never met dude you think oh my black son you text your mom tell her she's cancelled yeah your mom just got cancelled so hard she puts on 50 cent when you walk in

I want to make sure he feels at home I have Kool-Aid for you it's like, Mom, stop. Please stop. My brown-haired, blue-eyed son wearing a Mario shirt. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Absolutely. Man, oh, man. I don't know why, but the short of that is we go there, have to fill out the form to promise, hey, guys, totally, we're not related. W yeah no shit god i love this podcast we cannot stay on this fucking tell me about emperor hirohito how do you feel about okay emperor hirohito was i mean i have controversial opinions i mean he was a freaking puppet here's the thing here's the thing about here oh we're gonna fight yeah we probably disagree no no no no here's the thing here's the thing he was

weak-willed as shit i disagree he was no no no i agree he didn't from every single documentation that comes out he specifically did not want war he did not want conflict but once he signed up once the whole military was up was into it he basically was the it was the weakest position you could have of well fuck it might as well ball i disagree what do you mean explain that i completely think that he was complicit in the militarization of japan the entire time the military do you have any idea what's going on over the course of after the first side of japanese war heading into the period with manchukuo army navy competing disobeying orders the entire time. I completely think that that's fabricated.

No. 100%. Have you ever read the book on it by Bix? No. He has an entire book basically saying that Hirohito orchestrated the entire thing and played it off like he didn't. That everything afterwards would have been fabricated? Yes. Hear me out.

I don't see that. Hear me out. Look. Okay. words would have been fabricated yes tear me out i don't see that hear me out look okay so the entire argument is that he doesn't he doesn't have power and he's a puppet of the army and the navy right no not that he is a puppet is that he basically became that afterward but in because here's the thing that never happened in japanese history literally that is the entire fucking thing for japanese history that is one of my big points is like he was like once the entire point of the japanese emperorship throughout all of history do you have any idea how little power do you know the last time the emperor actually had real fucking power in japan was defined as 720 ad with the nara period not according to the japanese constitution

during world war ii yeah for what is supposed to happen what is supposed to happen doesn't actually mean it fucking does i'm listening oh i love this what did happen all of the people that would have sworn to defend the emperor uh-huh from the same people that tried to fucking coup and like to keep the war going right but why would you coup a guy that didn't have any power in the first place if he was just a puppet that had no power why would you say holy fuck we gotta kill him because if he makes a public announcement that that's to the entirety of the people that's the point so he's not powerless he is technically not that's the thing but legally for what you'd be able to do the amount of precedence that has to go into changing any single action within the government, it takes a lot more than that.

It sounds like he just needs to get on the radio and say what's up. He needs to. However, have you ever tried to get a Japanese person to say what it is that they actually fucking feel in a scenario instead of repressing it and holding it down? So he was powerful. Yes and no. It's quantum fucking physics at this point with Hirohito. It kind of sounds like you're just like, look. Oh, I love this. I could

beat up my sister, but I'm not gonna. Fight! That's what it sounds like. Could I win this fight? Absolutely. I'm just not going to because i'm an okay person well i'm just saying the final vote on whether or not japan was going to surrender was cast by the only person that directly answered to hirohito on the council hirohito decided to surrender yes

okay hirohito also sanctioned the attack on pearl harbor okay yes okay that's my whole point he's way more powerful than everybody plays him off to be no no i'm sorry this sun guy i understand that but it's not a matter okay look when we're talking about this it's not saying that he was completely fucking powerless that's never the point okay it's just that people either think in terms of absolutes that he was either the one who was directly in control of everything or the one who could absolutely do nothing but sit by as a helpless puppet there is no arguing that he was not complicit in all the shit okay that's the thing the reason as to why he was let go in the first place was specifically because of a thing

to save japanese honor and also to make the occupation afterwards easier that is the entire purpose as to why that was done and why he was spared okay otherwise i'll be on the same page exactly otherwise he would have been tried because here's the thing just because you may have been forced into something if someone gave you a gun and held a gun to your head and said hey killed this person and you killed them you still fucking killed them you still committed murder when you could have tried to do something to get out of that oh i don't even think it was that bad i was that bad. I don't think they put a gun to his head. I'm giving it as an example. Was the Pope complicit in the Crusades?

Actually, yes. Fuck yes. You kidding me with the first one? The Pope directly as a... He really knows medieval. I say this as a person. Chase, zoom in on my face right now. I say this as a person born and raised Catholic, alright? From the first Pope to call a crusade,

specifically the action done in an effort to strengthen relations and ties with French nobility and garner power around himself to secure his own position within Italy and also the power of the papacy. You don't think he was countering Islamic influence across Europe? He was. Yeah. Because guess what? Here's the thing that bothers me with history that happens with a lot of people

It's not fucking black and white No matter what anyone says in this here It's multiple levels of grays that overlap And so someone can do something For guess what? Multiple fucking reasons I would say that's objectively good I'll tell you why I care about this so much, because

every time I end up getting... Because it was a direct response to Islamic aggression. Yes, it was. It directly was. And then he looked at this and then he looked at this and went, okay, this is bad, and I could also make this pretty good for myself. And that's the whole point. How so? You do know how tenuous...

The Pope is Lockheed Martin? Yep. Basically. Dude dude that postdoc went up the crusade that postdoc was you have any idea how tenuous of a position the papacy was for the first like 500 years after it was established the first 400 years were basically controlled by local italian families that were constantly murder fucking each other and i'm saying that with every point of accuracy because that is what they would do it was a mixture between seduction and backstabbing oftentimes both at the same time in order to be able to secure position doggy style for three to four hundred years the popes were exclusively chosen from local italian nobility

not even local italian within rome and that's what it was. Once you started getting papal influence from outside powers, like those tied to the French, those tied to the Germans, those tied to others, they had to build their own power bases in order to allow them to be able to get anything done, because the entrenched politics of Rome would basically go, yeah, fuck you, no, we're not allowing you to do anything. You're going to do it this way, or we're going to have you disappear and that happened with multiple reformers every time that happened trout counter-argument no i want to go back to japan i had a burp we want to go back to this is i'm gonna argue with

anime about you that's about it and cameras no i i agree partially but... I'm so happy with this episode. I don't feel... No, I guess the politics of the time. Yeah. Trout's entire stance. You're right, but also based. I get on the Hirohito argument because I always end up getting stuck

on arguing with people on the internet about the atomic bombing of Japan. And the amount of misinformation that people fucking believe about that dumb shit. Like, the amount of people that believe that Japan tried to surrender beforehand and we said no just because we wanted to do it for funsies is fucking insane. No, no, no. Because what they offered was not even a surrender. No. They offered a white piece, basically's not a surrender you guys want to stop and we're going

to keep all of the government that just tried to take over the world completely intact and most of the land as well let's not forget that it wasn't even just keep our current regime it was basically yeah this is this is the guy in the middle of the boxing match pressed up into a corner arms broken in three different places blood pouring out of an eye and going yeah i think we're you want to call it a draw we could call it a draw and japan again was not a peaceful this this is a warrior society at this point like a warrior society which the ideology which i think americans have a really hard time it is what is it is like kamikaze. So it was imperialist.

That is normal. They are list. Everybody likes to make that like synonymous with like Western European culture. But like Japan was 100% imperialist trying to take over the fucking planet and they were doing a fantastic job. It was a hyper militarized. It's almost what would happen if you combined. Let's say that you combine Spanishanish colonialism with prussian militarization that is the closest thing that i could possibly associate with it because their entire ideology behind it was we want to be a member of the big boys being

the colonizers they wanted to do that but that was the whole idea behind the east asian co-prosperity sphere was that it was they were the biggest brother that was going to be taking care of all the little Asian brothers and that was their point. So everyone else was going to be subservient. They were all going to be one big happy family, but we're the big fucking brother. And just so you know,

if you mouth off to the big brother, you get popped. Very brutally popped. And they controlled the most yeah they controlled uh if you go by geographical land mass and territory it was i think it's the biggest empire that's ever existed no mongolia so it's close i think the stat they're taking into consideration was like sea rights and shit too. That doesn't count. No, that doesn't. Because Uber was going to shit off the ocean.

It's ocean. Listen, if you want to count the sea rights, the British Empire at its fucking height would beat that fucking ass out by a million miles. Well, there was a giant sense of racial superiority too. I don't know if this came out. That never went away. Yes, there was. That never went away either. No, I know. I don't know if this came out. That never went away. Yes, there was. That never went away either. No, I know. I don't know if it came out.

The Japanese considered themselves racially superior to all the rest of the agency we were talking about. It's the big brother. It's the biggest brother. They were the ones who were on top. The consensual sex of Nan King. No, there's like this really funny short of, I don't know if he's

like a japanese historian or whatever but he's like in the traditional japanese like robe formal outfit and it's like it's the snippet of joe rogan on his podcast explaining that the japanese were such this badass warrior culture that the mongols showed up and the japanese fucked him up and they left and this it just cuts to this japanese like historian dude laughing hysterically he's like no bro it was a typhoon it was every time three typhoons point of interdiction here it was both okay because the fucking thing is they did actually make landfall and there were multiple battles on land here's the problem yes literally not even just tsushima they landed on the mainland too and they Tsushima. Here's the problem. Tsushima. Yes. Literally. Not even just Tsushima. They landed on the mainland.

Mainland too. And they did fight battles. Here's the fucking problem. So this is the whole thing when you actually look at Japanese history and the whole point with how the samurai were structured in the first place. So the samurai fought in almost the same way that the Mongols did at that time. They were horse archers. That's what they were.

The whole sword is bullshit in the first place. The sword was never actually the common weapon. It was the spear and the bow. It never is. No. With the bow being the number one and that is what they utilize it's why if you look at old samurai armor they have these gigantic pads think of like a football pads on steroids where they're just gigantic squares that are right here and the whole purpose of that is to block arrows as i while riding a horse point back here i have a giant square shield on my shoulder that's protecting my face and that's the whole point so they're fighting the mongols with almost the same type of tactics against it's honestly not mongols at that point it's mass korean levies they've

been forced into the battlefield by the mongols but they win the problem is the samurai government almost immediately after this fucking collapses from winning. Do you know why it collapses after they win? Because their entire society was based off winning not only honor, but money and land after winning a battle. Yeah, it's like when your team wins a Super Bowl. You don't get new land after winning a defensive battle. So what ends up happening is that all the samurai go well the fuck do we fight fight and die for we didn't get any new lands or anything we get to

loot some of the dead bodies but that's it and so they rebel against the government and take it over god i love it that yeah true because they didn't get any land you just i got four skulls they didn't bring gold here because you're not traveling with anything of merit you're just coming to take everything most of the treasure and fleet and whatnot went down to the bottom of the fucking ocean from the typhoon they didn't have anything worth taking and mongols i i know you've done like different uh beats on it which i yeah we will get into it because it's one of my favorite pieces of history like mongols didn't give a about like property or any of that shit they were a roaming tribe a they're the steep people at least in the

beginning yes yeah yeah when it was gangas like gangas was very big and then the generations fuck that up but when they went to japan it was just like hey conquer shit time to kill yep by the time it got to the yuan dynasty here because at that point they were established that was it was a proper empire it was no longer the step nomads they were largely utilizing levied korean and chinese forces what are you doing step nomad i'm stuck in the south korean sea it's a fucking Genghis Khan. There's a vision of Genghis Khan in the most children. Just butts out of the water. Just the captain

standing on the boat, which is currently being impaled on a sharp rock. Oh no, I'm stuck. Step Nomad, help. Step Nomad, I'm stuck. Oh, it's going to be an unsub merchant. Just Genghis Khan with his ass out. Step Nomad, I'm stuck. Oh, it's going to be an unsub merch. Just get his ass out. Yes.

Step, no, step. No, man, I'm stuck. Is aggressive. All alone? Time to trim the old pubes. Hey there, beach babe. Are you ready to soak up those summer vibes and get the perfect beach bod?

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your order plus free shipping. Let's make this summer your smoothest one yet. Save me. Keep your ear and nose as tidy as your hedges with the Weed Whacker 2.0 ear and nose head trimmer. You'll be looking classy as ever. The updated Lawn Mower 5.0 Ultra groin and body hair trimmer got a summer makeover. It's waterproof now. For all those times you need to shave your groin or body hair at a Oh no. I'm not offending anyone. I mean, that basically was what happened with the establishment of the Qing Dynasty in the first place. So the Manchu people to the north got fucking invited in because there was Qing dynasty in the first place so the uh the Manchu people to the north got fucking invited in because there was a rebellion in the north and one of the uh

governors of an entire I think it was a province or a city and he just went ah yes I can use these step nomads in order to be able to fight the enemies against the central government so he fucking invites them in and you know what they do? Yes. Well, the defenses are no longer here. I guess we're in charge now. Chase, add the Pornhub sound. And that is how the Manchu under the Jurchin tribes ended up coming in and taking over fucking everything.

Come on, Jurchin. My tribe. Come on, Jurchin. There's tribe all over the place yes they did especially when the mongols yes they did the mongols have fucking go on no i was gonna say that's why i care so much about the like the misunderstanding of the power that hirohito had because a lot of people don't you're kind of looking at it as like jeff bezos is in control of amazon but also there's like 800 people below him making decisions that he never

actually gets to see. No, no, no. That's still associating too much. Here's the thing. No, no,

no. You're what you're saying from my belief. That's too harsh and definitive of a stance. Here's the thing. Again, I say that he was a guy who ended up being used. He is not innocent in this. I have never made a statement that he is in that sense.

In fact, he ended up getting away with a lot of the stuff that he was complicit in, allowed or ordered otherwise, that may or may not be able to be proven. The thing is, he did not have as much power to organize how things were done on the ground and for specific actions that led to as many war crimes because here's the thing he can say hey i'm gonna pull the trigger and then after pulls the trigger the fucking person controlling the bullet ends up splitting it off into three different directions

and going after an orphanage that's that's my point is that the generals and those underneath were significantly worse than anything he ever had in mind. It's like the idea of like, Hey, yes, you can attack China, but then the repercussions of that, then they turn it into the competition of a hundred heads. Yes.

Yes. Okay. We're still close enough to being on the same page. I'm happy with it. Everybody plays it off. Like he was literally like, everybody plays it off. Like he was fucking off in the corner playing with koi fish and had no clue

what was going on whatsoever. It's my argument. That's what upsets me is when everybody was like he was literally just like a halfway disabled kid playing with koi fish in his pond in his palace and he didn't know anything. No. Yeah. Okay. We're close enough to being on the same page. But that's why I care so much about like no, he had way more power than you think and he was complicit and he's a big part of the reason

that they didn't agree to surrender at japan earlier because the last stipulation before them surrendering that because they kept like lowering their expectations for surrender like three or four times and then finally the last stipulation was okay well you can't try the emperor for war crimes and we're like okay fuck it fine and that was it that was the surrender so like that's my whole point of like well if he was truly nothing all along why the fuck would that even be you have to pose spiritual again it is actually a big thing even if he was responsible for a lot more is spiritual importance because the so it was mandatory that he made that speech for the people because he was revered as a god a living god that's the whole

point a lot of a lot of japanese citizens god a lot of japanese citizens had never heard his voice like no they had never they dressed no one did no one did that was the first time it had ever been on radio ever no one outside of the immediate government that was right there had ever heard his voice his mind that is that is essentially that is essentially like for america it's like jesus coming over yeah it was literally like we're giving up and everyone's like well i was gonna say people people knew the radio transmission was coming they were dressed up like they were like the equivalent of going to church like people were dressed up like the formal occasion just to hear the emperor's voice over the radio it was kind of crazy that's i've never heard of marcus mcdilda yes yes i was

just about to ask this oh my god holy shit not off the top of my head guys get ready for this this is my favorite story this is gonna be a video later uh i have a like a very very detailed timeline that i've been working on for a while between like the relationship between the ussr and japan and all the events that led up to the atomic bombings and what happened and how the decision finally got made to surrender because i'm so sick of people on the internet just making shit up. Trust me when I say on this, before you continue, the first controversial video that I ever did was me specifically talking about the necessity of the atomic bombings. And I had a lot of, and I kid you, I'm not saying this is an exaggeration because some people in the internet will say, oh yeah, it's the fucking communist. No, I had actual communists coming after specifically me and my family because of that.

Bring it. Anyway, continue. Go ahead. But like I don't want to say hugely significant, but like more significant than anyone realizes. A part of the reason that the Japanese council, it was, was it three and three with the tiebreaker? Yes, it was. So it was three and three. They had met multiple times after the first atomic bombing. Right.

And the understanding at the time, a lot of people say that Japan didn't have an understanding of what an atomic bomb was, which is bullshit because they had an atomic weapons program in 1938. They did, but also here's the funny thing about that. When it comes to the atomic program, it never came anywhere close to even the theoretical stage of an actual explosion, much in the same way as the whole point that the Germans never even really came close. This is one of the key reasons why they focus so much more on biological warfare. Correct. But they were working on it.

100% right. But the reason it's relevant to this conversation is that they knew what it took to create it correct that played a huge role into them not believing that america had done it yes so they had an understanding of how difficult it was to create this type of weapon so they didn't the six dudes in charge that were making the decision, some of them refused, A, refused to believe that America was able to accomplish it.

And if they were willing to like accept that maybe America had pulled it off, they were realizing that, okay, well, even if America did do it, they don't have many of these weapons because they're so insanely hard to create, which is true because we didn't we only had three yeah but we had more than we had we had we had a line coming of more as we needed them

what was the estimate i can't remember the number what was the estimate that they were supposed to have i remember they they were supposed to have i think like five more by 1946 yes it was like they were coming they were getting like one or two a month and they could recreate them but like at the time we only had three so they were kind of partially correct but a big part of the reason that swayed the council into surrendering was that after the first atomic bombing the very next day an american pilot by the name of a p51 pilot i believe got shot down over osaka and he was recovered by the japanese and they interrogated him and they were torturing him. And they're like, tell us about these crazy ass atomic weapons. And he's like, I,

I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. He's just a fighter pilot over Japan and they'd keep torturing him and they keep torturing him. And the way the story goes is like the officer in charge pulls out his sword, bends him over like he's going to cut his head off. And Marcus McDowell is like, those atomic weapons. I know all about them. And just starts lying his ass off about the entire thing. And he's like, they're talking about science. And he's like speaking English to people that only speak Japanese.

And he's like, as you know, there's a lot of pluses and minuses. Like referring to the charges of fucking... Neutrons and electrons. Neutrons and electrons and positrons. When it's getting translated from a translator to a Japanese officer, they're like, oh, fucking this guy knows what's up. They send him to... Where was he? Tokyo, right? You said Osaka. Right, but Tokyo would have been the main... they send him to uh where was he in tokyo right yeah you said osaka kyota right but

he was based he was based out of tokyo okay so they sent him to there and they interrogated him further and that's where they had the head dude of their nuclear program previously with a translator and this dude eventually came to the realization like this guy literally has no clue what's going on whatsoever. He's just lying his ass off. Mr. Dudo is making a shit up. In the time that it took for him to get transported there and get determined that he was full of shit, the Japanese government had already heard that America had or the Japanese had recovered an American pilot that knew about the weapons. And he told them that America had hundreds of them on hand and that piece of information got reported according to macarthur's reports that got like information got spread throughout the meeting of the council

that america had hundreds of weapons and was like a pretty decent sized part of their reasoning to surrender because they thought America had a ton of. Oh, shit. Holy shit. We have a fire city. Well, not to mention that just about every fucking city. We only have a fire city. Remember in the first place that all the cities were made out of wood. That's why firebombs were more effective.

Correct. They did way more damage. Why firebombing was so incredibly effective because it was all so packed together. We're going to talk about the bat bomb. What do you know about the bat bomb? I know about the bat bomb here and that whole program that they spent millions on that ultimately ended up not being able

to actually function. It was awesome. Here's the thing. Theoretically, it did work. In tests, it worked. In practice, it didn't. Do you want to tell the story or should I? Let's, we'll do it worked. In practice, it didn't. Do you want to tell the story or should I? We'll do it together. You start.

Okay. So everyone knows back in World War II, there's a lot of fucking weird weapons. There was a lot of different ones. And there were many different cases throughout history of people utilizing animals. And what they discovered was that, oh, hey, so the majority of Japanese homes all over the country are made of wood and paper, and they are all glued together. Because the hell, half of it was that they most of the time didn't even use iron nails to nail any of this shit together. They would literally use wood joinery. And stick that together with paper. Which is fantastic carpentry.

It's artsy as hell. It's beautiful. But, problem with that is that it makes it remarkably easy for when a fire breaks out for everything to go to shit. So they were using varying different incendiary bombs, but the problem with incendiary bombs is that they are

bombs. The moment that they get dropped and utilized, this means that someone is able to go out and start fighting the fire immediately. So the idea that they came up with, or one guy came up with here and i can't remember the fucker's name bro do you know what his job was no i can't even remember what it was no this is the best part of the story i don't i don't remember his name either but he was a dentist from kentucky that fucking hated bats. He was super religious and he wrote in detail

that he firmly believes that God had created such a biological abomination for one sole purpose in human history. To burn the Japanese. And it was to strap napalms to to burn down Tokyo. It was like, God made this

flying rat for one reason. Kill the Japanese. He was an inventor. He'd invented other things before. He also held a patent for the fried chicken vending machine. He had a patent for a device he strapped to a mouse to fucking kill Filipinos.

Anyways, so he ends up he went to like college or some shit with uh fdr's wife eleanor roosevelt he sent a bunch of letters into the government yeah he wrote the letters directly to her that's how he got through the screening process because she knew him and he she wrote letters directly to eleanor roosevelt and she's like fuck it honey my college side piece wanted me to give you this and fdr is sitting there in his chair like i mean fucking in my work there's a signed like letter from fdr to his like um joint chiefs of staff saying this man is not a lunatic i think this is a plausible idea we need to investigate it the amount of times that animals have been used in varying different degrees of warfare is scary for how many times it's actually worked one of the things uh the queens that had a revenge story was the birds. Yep, the birds.

And burnt down a whole fucking... It was Olga. Olga of Kiev. Yeah, Olga. Burnt the city down with that. Also, with animal weapons, one of my favorites is when the Soviets were strapping bombs to dogs. To the dogs. To the anti-tank.

No. They were training dogs to be anti-tank weapons. So they were training dogs to run and hidetank weapons so they were training dogs to run and hide under tanks and then they would blow up well the problem was is that the dogs can't really differentiate between a soviet tank and any other that wasn't even a problem for not being able to differentiate all the training because they didn't have love this story because like dogs are man's best friend they're man's best friend this dead dog story and they killed all the soviets which proves my point that communists aren't people anyways i will say this on that note for it here

half the trainers refused to ever actually do any of this stuff in the first place so the program was half a time a failure the other problem was is that they when they trained the dogs they didn't do them in live fucking combat situations they trained you only get one chance with the dogs but the gunfire ptsd for dogs fucking right so the initial training what they have is first off not a german tank. They would have a Soviet tank stationary and they would train the dog to run under it. And that was my point so that it could blow. Problem was in real combat situation. It's not just individual tanks that are on the outside.

They have infantry that are moving with them to support and shoot at anything that moves in the first place. So the dogs, when they brought them into the battlefield, we battlefield were getting scared to shit they didn't know where to go so the dogs with timed explosives strapped to them were running back into their own lines to their handlers for safety and were blowing up their own lines i hate this so much how does your dog do during a storm for man's best friend sent a dog into space i hate i hate no they didn't they sent a dog's corpse into space because it died within like what was it 20 seconds because the uh the heat protection failed why do they want to murder dogs so much i hate why do you think i get so mad at communists they killed killed... Her name was Laika. It was a dog that they took.

She died on the way up. She picked her up off the street. And then they have the balls to be like, actually, you know, the Soviets were the first one to put a living animal in outer space. No, you didn't. You sent a dead dog into outer space,

you fucking pricks. She died? Immediately. Well, I know she died. I know she died eventually. They planned a thing. So the whole point, I forget how many days.

It was five or seven. But on the fifth or seventh day or whatever, the food that was supposed to release at that time was supposed to be poisoned in order to because it was too expensive to fucking bring the thing back to you know because why would they waste the money on that at that point they didn't value we need to nuke the soviet union so they so they did this the problem was the initial shuttle that they sent up was so shoddily designed with its heat protection that upon launching, it failed instantaneously, turning the entire shuttle into a fucking oven. So it cooked the dog alive. They cooked the dog alive. They cooked the dog?

Yes. Trout's having like an existential crisis coming to the realization communists don't care about dogs when they don't even care about their own people that's gonna be the dog needs to feed we didn't know what initially happened because for decades afterwards the soviet propaganda would say no we did this we were the first ones to send living animal to space we did this and then of course soviet union collapses all the stuff comes out here for things getting declassified and then in the 90s they look at this and go oh fuck no they didn't actually do any of this the dog died instantly per usual um do you know about the underwear database the wait the underwear

database yes no not off the top of my head you don't know about east germany's underwear database wait we didn't even finish the backstory i think we'll get there we'll get there it's going around okay i know we're like it left your words now and right during we're talking about underwear what is the name of the East German secret police force? Not NKVD, but... No, that was the Soviets. No, that was the Soviets. No, I know what you're talking about.

Why am I drawing a blank on this shit? I'm only thinking Spetsnaz right now, which is not right at all. That's their special forces. The Stasi. Stasi. The Stasi. We're like, you know, all these fucking people are trying to escape from our communist utopia. They don't realize that they have high literacy rates while they're starving to death.

These stupid fucking idiots. Anyways, we need to make sure they stay here is what the Stasi was working on. So they're like, here's the thing. If they do escape past the wall and the sand pit and the barbed wire, we're going to kill the guard that let him go. But we got to catch him. The way we're going to catch him and track him down is with dogs dogs need a scent so we're gonna go door to door through east germany and all the major metropolitan areas and we're gonna confiscate people's fucking underwear and we're gonna label it and we're gonna keep them in jars and then if you really did that

yes if you escape east germany we have a catalog of your underwear in a jar that we're going to be able to give to the dogs to track your ass down they went there's like an underground government facility just full of jars of fucking underwear in east germany it's hilarious what the fuck yes hold on oh listen i've covered a lot of dumb events in history i have never once done well i love that nick's like cheese underwear how the fuck have i not covered that again all the the the things that started me on social media was specifically dumb events in history that's where i got started how the fuck have i not found this i mean you even know about mr Dildo with the nuke.

This is our... McDildo? Yeah. McDildo. Dildo. McDildo. Sorry. A, not an O. That's why I asked. God damn it. I'm gonna have to... He's looking at communist underwear right now and it's just pumping on.

We're just like boxer briefs with stars on their dick. It's literally just that. You get the hammer and sickle in their cock. Want to check out my sickle? I got a hammer. Truly, Nick. When Nick has a raging hard-on for hatred against communism and it's

just underwear pictures popping up it's like fuck i should just search something i know it's upsetting oh well you're gonna find it i have to ask this how the fuck did we get here oh this is welcome to unsubscribe this is my tangents on my own show. Back to the bat bombs. Where were you? Everyone comes here and they're like, what the fuck happened? We don't know. It's called alcohol history. You want another white claw?

No, I gave him one and he refuses to open it. Because I'm already on this one and this one. You were talking shit. You're like, alcohol doesn't affect me, guys. I've never been hungover and I'm 30. Which one of those is most empty? And I'm going to grab it. I'm going to drink it right now. Wait, doesn't affect me, guys. I've never been hungover, and I'm 30. Which one of those is most empty, and I'm going to grab it. I'm going to drink it right now. Wait, don't drink the whole thing.

Yes. I don't want my... Stop. I need you to sign out this form really quick. It's called a liability form. No, he's just going to the bathroom. And you're like, fuck! Stop. Why would you do that?

Yeah, I agree with your wife. We'll do a shot. Do not. Don't do a shot. Wait, is that the nice one? Wait, is that the nice one? I don't know. Wait, is that the nice one?

No, I put it up on the shelf. Oh, okay. I was like, wait. It's the one I had a shot of earlier. We'll do a shot of the nice one. We'll do a shot of the nice one. It's going to be nice. No, he's claiming he'll chug a shot of earlier. We'll do a shot of the nice one. We'll do it. Yeah. Yeah. We'll do it. The nice one will be nice. No, he's claiming he'll chug the remainder of that.

I don't want you to die. And don't do that. Your wife is saying to not do that. You're one of those drunks. It's true. I have three of those. I have three of those friends. You have different categories of drunk.

It's the wife. His wife right now is being sweet. She's like, he pees in random places. No, no. This is going to be a thing in here now. This is going to be revealed to the fucking world here. A week and a half ago. So I peed in a towel warmer.

So you know how you can get those. Hold on, hold on, hold on, stop. What's it? Okay. How much money are you making on the history of everything podcast? I don't even have a towel warmer, let alone an abundance of towel warmers that I feel comfortable pissing on. Not as much as you.

I can promise you fucking that. I can definitely promise you here. Um, so the towel warmer, it's, it's literally just a metal tube that you throw a towel in hit the button it warms it to like a toasty temperature not hot but like a toasty temperature that when you step out of the shower in the middle of winter and it's freezing in your bathroom you get to put a nice toasty towel around you that sounds dope it is it is nice and sounds like white people that was his idea right no no no it was not my idea don't you fucking dare say that it was yours and you got it as a christmas present from a friend it wasn't even i didn't even buy it

it's just she was talking about wanting it and a friend bought it for her as a christmas present that's what it was and i peed in it what into it into it what I didn't even know here's the thing I I guess it goes with alcohol I think thing is so here's the thing Tell it properly drinking over the course that night here. Okay fine. This is his this is his white wife. Yes Kentucky allow me to introduce her. Yes. Hello. Okay, so i wake up and i'm like why is my towel warmer uncovered it's uncovered and it's on the ground like everything's on the ground it doesn't smell like asparagus no literally so he wakes up and i'm like hey what did you do to my towel warmer and he's like i didn't do anything the cat must have hit it so i'm like okay whatever sure the cat hit it i'm thinking it's a fucking ghost so i pick up the

lid to put it on and i look in there i'm like did the cat pee in the i mean it is like it's a big towel warmer and there is so much fucking pee in here i don't remember doing it that's the thing and i didn't black out when i went to bed like i was fully conscious everything i remember all the details but apparently at some point in the night i woke up went to the bathroom and peed in the towel warmer good i love my friends that do i dude oh my god oh fuck one of my favorite military stories well i'm saying names he peed he did the same thing always the best way to start out a story yeah you just piss uh when he got drunk he would piss so he was pissing and garasek was laying on the floor garasek's asleep we're all shit wrecked garasek just passed out and he just feels water no we'll call him alphabet and you already know alphabet's just

standing and then he just stops and lays back down on the couch and Gary's like, what the alphabet? He's shit right. He doesn't. Next day, we had to explain what happened in the middle of the night. I was like, ah, infantry dudes. This is where we are. God bless your soul.

Oh my god. Anyways, the bat bomb wasn't even weird. How was the bat bomb a failure because i disagree that it was radically successful no no no here's the thing it worked from all practical tests yes it did not actually work when they tried to want like to utilize i don't think they ever utilize no that's the thing that's why because the program got shut down before oh okay so we're on the same page yeah i thought you were saying it didn't work i was like you know it's highly effective no no just decided not to it worked in all the practical tests it's just in

the end they they didn't actually use it you know the official reason why they never actually used it god i can't remember if i i covered this like three years ago i don't remember they didn't have enough time to round up enough fucking bats before they were going to finish the atomic bomb. Was the reason that they abandoned the project. They're like, by the time we breed 3 million Mexican dovetailed bats, they'll have finished the atomic bomb and we won't need them. Oh, I'm sure we lose the cost of atomic bomb in 1945. What was it? $300.

$4 million. $4 million. $20 million. Okay, so they spent $2 billion on the project in 1945 as a whole, which is the equivalent of $30 billion in 2023. That was the atomic bombing at the cost in here. If I recall correctly, they only spent a couple million dollars on the BAT program. Ooh.

Ooh. Ooh! Ooh! Eli! Ah! I'm a ghost. What are you doing? I'm here to tell you about Ghost Bag. Is this an ad?

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Right now, GhostBed is offering 50% off all their products. Just use code unsubscribe at checkout or go to ghostbed.com slash unsubscribe. Please buy some at ghostbed.com slash unsubscribe. I'll be under your bed if you need me. Do you know the story about how the bat program got continued?

Wait, what? What do you mean continue? Like into Vietnam? They almost cancelled it the first time. And then it got pressed into actually becoming a finished product that they ended up abandoning because they couldn't get enough bats. That sounds like military. it the first time. And then it got pressed into actually becoming a finished product that they ended up abandoning because they couldn't get enough bats. After the first test... Because it worked, but they killed the bats that they used the first time.

They tried to abandon it. You know why it got to stay alive? I tracked down a book but we're fucking doing this. We're going hard, okay. It's okay. grab steven another one he'll do it with us yeah no he's immune to alcohol cheers and then we tap it and then we shoot it before y'all did that i had already drank so they were gonna have the very first that is some of the

best they were gonna have the very first test of it show thank you ever and like this was an army project at the time so the army was heading up this project and they were going to have the test of it they did the test it ended up almost burning down the entire airfield yes because the um it wasn't just the airfield it's like specifically where they were located like where they were stored everything got lit on fire like san diego no they were like out in the fucking desert so like there was nowhere to for the bad secret roost except for the buildings that they had built for their operation wooden buildings so they like burned down the entire airfield and the army is like well this doesn't fucking work and there was one

marine corps general that showed up because he thought it would be funny and wanted to see it. And that one Marine Corps general was like, what the fuck do you guys mean? This isn't working. That worked exactly. It was a working demonstration. You guys are just dipshit. It works. So then the Marine Corps general took it up and the Marines ended up finishing the program because the army didn't want to anymore.

Damn, these bats that we trained to burn shit down burned all our shit down. Their estimation is that a bat bomb was going to be 20 times more effective than an incendiary bomb. Yes. And the incendiary bombs were more effective than the atomic bombs. Correct. So by all accounts, America had an even superior super weapon that we could have deployed on japan that was way more effective than the atomic bombs but we did shouts out dresden what's up but there's a beautiful reason as to why so we think of fighting fire you think of fighting fire with water right you

douse it that's what you do the beautiful reality of why this would have worked so much more effectively in comparison to a standard incendiary bomb is that the best way to fight a fire is to create breakages in the fire's path in order to stop it. Like, you don't give it fuel. So when it, when a firebomb hits an area, it hits a concentrated area, and then from there it spreads out. So if you can destroy enough of the area

surrounding it, it will have nowhere to spread. But the bat bomb, the bats spread out throughout the entire city and so when the fuses go off every single place around the entire city will go off at the same time meaning it will be a conflagration that blows out instantaneously they all blow up at once and you have a thousand fires then you have a thousand fires that you can't create any breakages. Well, it was literally this week I learned how carrier pigeons work because Olga. Yeah, Olga of Kiev.

Yeah, Olga of Kiev. She used sparrows, according to the legends. But it is, I didn't realize it was the idea. Like, hey, you go to the place, you grab the pigeons from where they're located at, and then you move them. When you let them go, they fly back home. Home. Yeah.

That's a name. Homing pigeonsing pigeons yes i did not know that i was like wait how the fuck do they send messages like this and you'd have a dude that lived in that city grab that bird walk all the way back it wasn't just homing they would use pairs so they would typically use mates so they would always fly to each other that was the whole point so the boy pigeon knew where to tell the girl pigeon to fucking go no that's why you used pears is you used mated pears because they would mate and then they would they would search each other out and just fucking burn down cities. There you go. You're proud of that one. That's a good one.

No, that wasn't pride. That was, ah, I'm going to get canceled. It's a good thing that 97.9% of my audience are all men. And the other women that watch it are married to men that think I'm funny. So it should be okay. We've met them. They were cool people. Shouts out. Unsub live tours coming soon. November.

My favorite part about meeting a fan in public is when he's with his significant other and I say hi to him. He's all excited and then the wife is there. I'm like, oh, hi, how are you? And they're like, yeah, I watch your stuff too and I go, do you actually watch my stuff too and i go no you don't do you actually

watch my stuff or do you just tolerate hearing my voice in the background as your husband laughs and they just go yeah yeah it's on the living room also there's a lot of women that don't recognize me when their husband freak out and then i start talking to their husband and then they know who i am because they've never watched the videos oh my god that guy fuck him see that happens for a lot of things where people don't recognize because i look like a lot of standard white guys that's the thing you're very standard white i do i am a standard white guy as my wife has actually referred to me as standard white guy trademark that is white guy number that is that is what is referred to but you're a default skin yeah any game it's like

number two i have a fairly distinct voice very so what ends up happening is that we'd be in public and someone would look at me kind of question themselves and then move beyond then they would hear me speak and that's when the double take would happen. Because otherwise, there's nothing else they would recognize. He looks like that one white guy I know. Yeah, oh, he's like that one. Yeah, it could be literally anyone. Let's just go pick it from a bucket,

because I'm sure there's going to be a dozen more. That one white guy that's had shit all over his shirt the entire time. Ah! We fucking got him! Oh, he has remained undefeated. the entire time. something on the shirt he just shoots you blood splatters my face seriously there's a cum right there i didn't even look i didn't even look i'm looking right here he's just looking pulled up anyway just like i can do it i can do it too he does that my favorite was no oh oh windigoon definitely my favorite definitely not. Definitely my favorite. Definitely not my favorite. My favorite

wasn't even caught on camera. I think I've told this story before. When I tried to do it to Chuck Liddell. Oh, that's dangerous. I knew I was going to meet Chuck the first time I met Chuck, and I was like, I'm going to fucking do it. I told myself I was going to... I chickened out. I told

myself I was going to do it the second time because I met Chuck and drank with him, and he's really nice, and he's super cool. I was like, I'm going to fucking do it i told myself i was gonna i chickened out i told myself i was gonna do it the second time because i met chuck and drank with him and he's really nice and he's super cool i was like i'm gonna do it i chickened out again and the third time i met chuck little and i fuck it i'm gonna do it and i go up to chuck liddell the ice man that i grew up watching as a middle schooler just put people in coffins for a job like i thought this was the baddest man on the fucking planet punch people in the face and like job like i thought this was the baddest man on the fucking planet punch people in the face and like just watching them on x-science commercials and spike tv and i walk up to chuck liddell and i go chuck you got shit all over your shirt bro and chuck deadpan looks me in the eyes and goes no i don't i do that dumb shit to people and i immediately went i believe you

and he goes he goes here watch this turns around and then does it to somebody right in front of me it was the fucking best experience i've ever had in my life. It's one of, like, literally one of my core memories. One of the favorite things that ever happened to me. I don't know. Wendigoon, dog. Wendigoon, because you're like this. And I was like, no, like, you're being for real. They're shit. And then Wendigoon's like this.

Your mic's been off the whole time. And then we are, this is's that's a six or a five person episode so it's everyone there and when you go finally looks down just make hits him and then the crowd of we've been bullying talking shit drunk and then we're like just immature boys yeah i'm gonna be the best one caught on camera is probably you to be fair oh the first one was good dude i just like then your reaction though when you're like i got third grade it's the funniest fucking reaction i've ever gotten and then the then

randomly the light falls and hits you yeah dude we had a we had this is at the old place there was a light on a stand he does that and then like 10 minutes later the light goes what i'm like oh fuck you i was like so you've never got me huh you've never got me you've attempted twice give it a second no yeah go on you touch your fingers to my chest all the time and i just stare and i make eye contact with the camera the trout doesn't want to take the bait you yeah he won't give me that joke i can tell yeah it's okay speaking of segway i'm gonna get it no it's gonna get i'm gonna like we're gonna do like a scientific experiment with conditioning i'm gonna i'm gonna get it

just give it time yeah no i'm gonna sneak viagra into your drinks from now on and i'm gonna i'm gonna get it just give it time yeah no i'm gonna sneak viagra into your drinks from now on and i'm gonna time it when i know it's gonna affect and then i'm gonna touch your chest and then you're gonna think you're into it after i touch your chest and then we're gonna condition you to be able to do it no he's gonna wait until after a night of drinking and eating and then just start putting like hot sauce and mustard and just like actually putting shit on there so there is something to look down at and then get him. He's just going to punch him in the stomach. He's going to be like oh look down.

Uppercuts his nose but got him. Fuck you. Trout's going to happen. He's going to get you. So Trout, quit trying to main character the camera right now. Stop it. I was just having a conversation. Chase, don't cut to that shot. I was just having a conversation with the audience.

The camera now just ignores the trap what a weird thing to say they just said so speaking of segways you used to be like big on like medieval history and then now you've moved into like modern history no i do literally every history if you will so here's here's literally everything so this is the problem in that every time I create something, so it's going to sound a little like a fucking story for how this all started out. So the History of Everything podcast, right? I started the podcast specifically because people, yes, you have. It was a very fun episode where we talked about stupid military shit that have happened, dumb guns and things that were invented. You're the one that set this up. Yeah.

Thank you. I was like, did show do this? I always, I never know the guest links because they're like months in advance and I'm like, me and you came up on TikTok. Because it was us on TikTok. It was like the same exact time, like within six months of each other,

I think we both blew up on TikTok. Pretty much, yes. I think there was like overlap of like, people thought we were the same person for a half a second. There was weirdly enough. White guys with beards. Yeah. But whatever.

We're in the same vein. Yeah. We're both loud and white. because a lot of the stuff that i would do is dumb events in history dumb inventions in history and i would go into a lot of military tech that didn't pan out and that would go right hand in hand with stuff this guy was covering so it would be very common and so i started the history of everything podcast because people were wanting long-form content of what I created. So I started making that. And the whole point with the history of everything is that I literally cover the history of everything because

I have no specialization. So if someone, like this is the thing that I tell people all the time, that if you want to launch into a debate with me specifically about 18th century French politics or some shit, I will be able to talk to you about it but i will lose to a person that is trying to debate me on it that that is their specialization for easily of course because my thing is that i cover literally everything the first episode we ever did is the history of potatoes which the audio quality of that i'm saying for anyone who goes and listens to it right now is shit because i was using a yeti mic that was bought second hand and it had an echo problem it was really bad but i used that and it's the joke is it's from potatoes to crusades

literally anything and everything because everything has a story so i would go into all the weird history of all these little details military animals potatoes which by the way on that note for it here did you know that potatoes people believed cause a disease called scrofula show did you know that okay do you know what scrofula is in the first place scrofula scrofula is tuberculosis it is the same bacteria that causes tuberculosis, except when you get the infection in a place outside of your lungs. So, exactly. People think tuberculosis is just the lungs.

Scrofula is when you get that same bacterial infection, but in, like, the arms or the face or the groin or some shit. Wait, what the fuck does that do, then? It will literally rot you. It will kill you. Gross. So it's way worse than tuberculosis. No, tuberculosis in the lungs is the most deadly. Easily. But the problem is, it propagates

you will survive a lot longer suffering with scrofula. The thing is, they believed that potatoes in the early days caused this disease. And the only way to cure it was to be touched by a member of the royal family god i'm not fucking i love old science is my favorite i'm not kidding so there would be a ceremony called the king's touch where the the king of respective country and this was

very common in france and england the king had a a medallion called a i shit you not this is the actual name a touch piece so my uncle called it yeah there you go so and upon their coronation there would be a ceremony where they would take this touch piece and they would touch the peasantry while prayers are being recited over them and that that whole thing was supposed to cure the peasants of Scrifula. Because that was the belief. That is that by touching them, you would believe this. Or that you'd be cured.

So going into the 1700s, I can't remember the exact name of the king who it was. But it was in England. It was like one of the last examples. And I can't remember the exact king who it was. But at his coronation, and for anyone who's watching this right now, they can look it up. He, when asked if he was going can look it up he he he when asked

if he was going to perform it he said yes did it and then wished upon the crowd that had gathered after praying over them and said may god give you better health and better sense like tell them that they're a bunch of superstitious-ass peasants, and they need to grow the fuck up. I shit you not. That is the exact... New old kings just don't give a fuck. So, that's one of the big stories. To this day, it's my favorite episode that I ever created.

But the story of it, with everything, is that the history of everything is literally everything. That's horrible, isn't it? Potatoes, crusades, modern geopolitics, whatever it is, it has a story. And that's what I talk modern geopolitics whatever it is it has a story and that's what i talk about isn't that the worst like it's like because me and you have very similar backgrounds like well no it sucks because it's like there's a lot of videos that i did and it's like man that's a fucking 45 minute hilarious video good thing i covered it early on in my career in three minutes with horrible fucking audio and video quality really glad about that i'm sure you have the same feeling the amount of comments that

i also get to talk about it's like man this guy this is an interesting subject um the amount of times that he says this could be an entire video in and of itself is getting annoying and i'm like yes because every fucking time i talk about something it could spawn eight other videos because we could talk about anything else. That's the problem with the history of everything. You could cover everything. But it's super interesting. I will say going through yours. I was like, well, okay.

This is a harder one to take notes on. Where do we start? I was like, I'll just do rough notes on this one. I'll listen to a handful of episodes and then we'll go from there. Hey, this piques my interest. Nick, this will pique his interest. Chad, I was in a I was not thinking of you being in this episode

until this morning. And Nick sent me a text and was like, hey, you want to be in this episode? That's a great idea. I feel like you started on medieval history. To a degree. I want to talk about crossbows.

To a degree. That's why I'm trying to get him into medieval history. Okay, I can. What subject? What are we talking about? Genoese? Pavise? Are we going into the bands?

Are we going into the papal relations with them? What are we talking about? I'm doing a video. Are we talking about Chinese? No. No. Europe. European.

Only solely European. Okay. Are we talking about the Balestrian? Imagine you when you're drunk. Are're talking about Chinese? No. No. Europe. European. Only solely European. Okay. Are we talking about the Bible study? Imagine you when you're drunk. European. That history. People are talking at me right now. Okay.

Are we talking Genoese and the Italian ones? Are we talking the later Roman ones that were used by houseguards? No. English ones. European England. Okay. Sounds like everyone knows. I'm drowning.

All right. So many words. Crossbows. So, Death of Richard the Lionheart. No. Okay. There. Got it. So many words. Crossbows. So Death of Richard the Lionheart. No. That's not a good report. Okay.

There. Got it. We've locked in. There are so many people talking right now. This is the whole point. When you cover everything, you got to go, okay, we're going to need to gradually shorten this down until we have a frame to work with because you could literally talk about anything and everything. No, but that's like, this is the category of like your shorts that introduced

me to you it was like like i would i would be scrolling through my shorts and i would see something about you know knight's armor and you would be like hey listen here's this thing blah blah blah and i'm like oh all right cool yes and so now we're we're honed in on that. Richard the Lionheart. We're talking 1200 AD. Okay. Go on. Specifically about his death, about how he was killed by a peasant who he promised who would get his...

I'm doing a video about snipers and this is the first sniper kill in history. It's the angle I'm going with. Wait, hold the fuck up. I'm the audience learning something. I'm going with. Wait, hold the fuck up. I'm the audience learning something. I'm going to start something here from the very beginning. Richard the Lionheart is one of the most famous kings of England. This is the guy that if you've ever

seen, this is going to sound dumb, this is going to be a fucking flashbang for anyone who remembers this. How many people remember the animated Robin Hood where it's a fox? I thought you were going to say A Knight's Tale with Heath Ledger. No. The animated Robin Hood, where it's a fox. He was the lion. I thought you were gonna say A Knight's Tale with Heath Ledger. No. Fuck. No. No. That's what it's based off of.

The animated Robin Hood, where he is a fox in that shit. Okay, so, in this point you have King John, who is taxing people while Richard the Lionheart is off in the Holy Land, who is the big hero of this whole story. And throughout a lot of English history, Richard the Lionheart is the hero,

while his brother John was trying to usurp the throne and all the stuff at home. When brother John was trying to take care of the country. And also the reason he was taxing people was because he was trying to raise money to pay for his brother's ransom because his fucking brother decided to insult the Duke of Austria while in the Holy Land, get his ass captured and then held for ransom until he could get released. Because, whole context behind the story for why this happens in here. This is how clocks were made. Yeah, this is the bullshit that happens.

They're in the Holy Land, right? They're laying siege to a castle. And when they're doing this, Richard the Lionheart shows up with his forces, takes command of the entire thing, and leads the attack on it. The Duke of Austria had already been leading an attack in it for the entire time in here fighting off or, or, or, or fighting to take this castle in the first place.

When they take the castle, they start planting their flags on it for the big thing for victory. And they all plant their flags. The Duke of Austria plants his flag. And Richard basically goes up to this and goes, what the f*** is this shit? Takes it, throws it away, and goes, you're not a king. You don't get to be with us here in the big boys.

Which, as you can imagine, royally pisses off a f***ing noble. So, by the time that Richard is on his way back from the Holy Land, he ends up getting his ass captured and gets placed with the Austrians where they're being held. And this same count or Duke who got his, you know, horribly embarrassed at that time in the Holy Land is like, ah, yeah, you're my prisoner now, bitch, and holds him for ransom until he can get paid. So when King John, the evil king, is taxing all the peasantry, it's to raise money in order to pay for his brother's ransom to get him back.

That's the context of that story in the first place. They get back and here's the thing. Richard the Lionheart, most popular king or one of the most popular kings throughout all of English history, fucking hated England. Hated it. How so? He spent or one of the most popular kings throughout all of english history fucking hated england hated it how so he spent nine over 90 of all of his life not in england but in france that is what he loved he spoke french that was his primary language he specifically wanted to live in france and he is quoted quoted as saying if he could sell the english crown he would yes that was how royal families worked back then yes so he specifically he would rather be a duke in france than a king of england so a lower rank he would much rather do it so he spent

all of his time fighting in france over the territories that he believed that he should rightfully control because the english and french fucking hated each other throughout all of his time fighting in France over the territories that he believed that he should rightfully control because the English and the French fucking hated each other throughout all of history. And while he was besieging a castle in France, he gets sniped by a crossbowman who, as it turns out, according to the stories, was a kid

who was just up on the battlements and managed to hit him with a crossbow. Richard, that's according to the stories no i understand i'm i'm growling at what there's a lot of things here he called forth he told his commanders that were leaving the army he was dying because at first it was going okay but it was going septic he calls forth to that child who had hit him and said please come to the camp i promise you your safety and told his commanders you will do no harm to this child

he has done a great honor in taking out a great enemy and that was his final wish as he lay dying was that he gave a pouch of gold to this kid for killing him that it was an amazing thing that he managed to do do you know what the actions were from the from its commanders as soon as the king died killed them they fucking flayed the kid alive oh base base base base they skinned him alive basically that sounds about right suck dick dude and yes as you can imagine for the whole point of this long-winded story is that he uh he did that with a crossbow because that was what was all over france at the time how far was this shot i don't know so it was as he was if i recall correctly he was checking on the sappers so the way that you would take down walls at the time is that you would dig underneath them because walls were

secure so it took a long time to do but you would dig a trench line leading up to the castle wall and then you'd have a mine shaft that would go underneath the wall you would then use post beams supported underneath the wall that you would put a bunch of hay and other stuff in there light it on fire and then as that conflagration would take hold it would cause all the beams to simultaneously collapse the loss of that support of which would lead the entire wall to collapse in one go and that was how you created a breach that allowed you to storm a castle wall. I love that sappers are still used into this. Yes. So he was investigating

the front lines when he got sniped. Imagine how long Lord of the Rings, the two towers would have taken if they had used that method instead of one asshole orc with a sparkler. Sparkler. Or

hypothetically, you build a beautifully ornate horse and you give it as a gift to your enemy. And... I gotta use the bathroom. I'll be back. Get it. Get it. You hide a lot of your friends inside of this beautifully ornate horse

and you give it to them as a gift. Is that what I sound like when I talk about World War II? No. Oh, okay. Oh, yes. Listen. Horse. Horse.

Which is also really crazy that worked. Trojan horse. Hilarious hilarious that is like you're like ooga booga they leave it's one of those things and then you bring it in thank you for the gift i would be like we're shooting it and then blowing it and then everyone's like imagine that is your commander pitching you this idea to get in a fucking wooden horse and be like bro they're gonna let you that's the funniest thing about history is like you're just reading it was like how did they not see this coming you're like oh this is the first time it ever happened like this

is the og idea like this horse snores it's like reading the art this horse farts and burps if you read the art of war you're like this is the most generic stupid obvious shit on the planet you're like the the what if we attack, stupid, obvious shit on the planet. You're like, hurry up. What if we attack the enemies when they weren't expecting it? Fucking, what do you guys think? This was revolutionary at the time. Use a sun. Make sure in the enemy eye they not see it coming.

Unprecedented. Oh, yeah. And also send your own spy and send them in. They poison people. If at all possible, try to attack the enemy when they can't see. Wow. Ground breaking. Oh, if you in a trench, you win every time, you know.

I'm going to take these notes. This is a book, okay? He's like, what if you just kill the other guy? Oh yeah, that's a good note. Okay, you kill other guy, you win. Okay, next one. Wow, thank you. They're just pitching out of here.

He was just the first guy to write that shit down. If anybody... Unsub's about to start a B channel. The Unsub Side Projects. We're going to have the entire audiobook of Eli reading The Art of War in that voice.

In that voice? I'll do a Chinese voice. He said Chinese voice. Okay, you know you know but no i wanted i like i i like the i just did like an hour and a half long video on carlos hathcock and i kind of like talked a little bit about the initial like crossbow being the og sniper you know why that kind of got brought up oh it was common hell the whole thing with the genoese so here here's the funny thing. When it came to the crossbow and how it was used. So within the Italian city-states, it was one of those common things to have crossbowmen. That was the

defensive guard. That is what was utilized as one of the primary mercenary forces. Genoese, Pisan, Milanese, these crossbowmen were one of the most common mercenaries that you could possibly have and they were high quality because they were used for city defenses. The problem was is that theoretically they weren't actually legally allowed to leave the city to fight for another country it had to be negotiated by the city itself in order to allow it these men were trained almost

in the same way that you would have for um english longbowmen but it's a fucking a lot easier to train people to crossbow than anything else yeah So they were constantly used in so many foreign conflicts and wars that they were elites, basically. I don't have to wait for the anatomy of their bone density to change for them to be able to draw the crossbow. No, that's what a witch is for. You just fucking pedal it until you be able to turn it. Chronologically would have been what, like the 14-ish hundreds? Technically, yes. chronologically would have been what like the 14 ish hundreds technically yes but you're talking about a period largely where it's used from the 1100s is one of those common going all the way

into the 1400s yes okay so because past that point you have the um yes because past that point you have different groups of italian mercenaries called the condottiere and the condottiere they are the um they are the ones that would be used to compete with like you have the varying different swiss mercenaries you have the landsnakes that would appear later that it's that period careful that's a that's a slur

jesus christ chase chase bleep that don't keep it in chase good we just keep everything trout says he's like take it out chase keep it he's like no do you know who carlos hathcock is uh i've taught my hit no the famous marine sniper with like 93 confirmed kills oh yes yes i do yes so like you know how he always has like that legendary story of shooting through a scope uh nobody's ever

been able to redo it including mythbusters i redid it yeah i got it in like a hundred thousand frames per second we shot we shot straight through uh me pew view and uh high uh ballistic high speed shot straight through a mozen nagant scope with a winchester model 70 30 out six round caught it in a hundred and hundred thousand frames per second it was fucking awesome that's nice that is really nice where when's that getting uploaded and where's that either tomorrow or friday so august 15th or 16th so probably before this goes out for sure three weeks ago three weeks ago still dope as fuck because it is you sent that video he's like

i don't know why we still say it in the group chat we're like don't show yeah we're like don't send this anywhere like we've ever uploaded each other's content we're still just okay here's the high speed footage though it looks fucking gangster it blew like all the internals of the scope into the dude's brain like we ripped it apart and there was like did you use like one of the ballistic heads and everything yeah we used a ballistic dummy with an actual mosin-nagant scope and like we pulled out a handful of just metal shards and a bullet that were in this guy's brain after the fact it's like yep that's possible god the chinese don't even need to do anything with their sniper just just fucking shoot through scopes it's that simple create your own grenade super simple oh

this story i've never been able to tell as good and we've discussed it a couple times but i know you did a piece on that i want you to explain it to the audience it is the mongol empire going against the russians when they first invaded russia and how they fucked like russia was just like what the just happened and then how much ptsd it cost for a long period of time for the invasion of the kievan rus okay so here's the thing before russia was ever russia in the first place it was divided into a number of different principalities these are the kievan rus peoples uh the majority of which the leadership is actually based off of Scandinavian origin. So it was the Vikings, specifically the Swedes, who had come in and had largely taken over large regions of the

Slavic territories and then taken control, creating their own little principalities of ruling elite. So you technically speaking had a grand prince of Kiev and the whole thing was a loose federation where you had all these varying different principalities that technically owed allegiance to the Grand Prince. But for all intents and purposes, they were basically independent kingdoms. The Mongols roll in after their conquest and they sweep across the steppe. The thing about the principalities is that they never had to deal with any kind of actual threat from the east because who the fuck would go through Siberia? No one would ever do anything like that. But the greatest problem that, uh, that they, you know, armies had to face at that time was logistics. And with the Mongols, they didn't have to fucking worry about that because all of their

supplies they just took with them because they could live off of horses it was the standard for a mongol warrior that you were able to live off of of mare's blood and milk so they would actually get a large part of sustenance on the march specifically from the blood and milk of the horses upon which they rode no wonder demo matt's so jacked yeah it's mare the blood and milk of the horses upon which they rode. No wonder Demo Matt's so jacked. Yeah. It's mare's blood and horse milk. Yes. And not only that, people think, okay, so you're going to bleed your horse for sustenance.

That's going to weaken it over time. Yes, but each Mongol warrior was expected to have at least three spare mounts. And at least there were many that would have a dozen so you're talking about you have a horde of 10 000 warriors leading with them like a hundred thousand sorry i'm gonna sidetrack you but does this have anything to do with the origins of the mythology of vampires because this sounds like it might no that's all okay that's all right i just Transylvania. Sorry, I just heard blood sucking forward and it shows up in the final test.

The horse into your house. Completely different story with the fucking so they would subsist off of it because they would raid pillage and the problem was is that no one could use burnt or scorched earth tactics against them because they moved so fast that they would reach

a place before they had a chance to actually burn supplies so they would take whatever it is that they wanted in the first place you couldn't really scorch earth against them so the mongols move in and the tactic that they simply had was basically surrender to us or not only will you die the land itself dies that they would burn every single thing to the ground this is where salt like we like salt that is where that statement came from like we're fucking no that came from the romans and that came from the romans because the fall of carthage the quote from scipio africanus the conqueror of africa was that they would salt the earth so that carthage would never rise again no shit so carthage like

northern tunis this was a very fertile region in the first place they salted the earth so that a rival could never pop up there again because that was for almost the entirety of rome's history until the rise of the parthians and other peoples to the east there was never a challenger like carthage in roman history and they guaranteed that wouldn't happen by destroying the possibility of any rival in the land that they took nick thank you for this i told you thank you so that's where that's where that comes from i pick good podcast so the models move in and because of how fast they move they conquer everything the nobles end up rallying

under specific leaders because the way that they work is they rule under boyars boyars being the equivalent of a knight count duke etc it's a local lord that is the one that controls the serfs and they lead forces into battle whatever it's generally pretty small armies, but led by these local elite retinues. They don't have a strong mercenary or middle class or anyone that can actually stand up to them in comparison to what you typically see in places like England or others. So the boyars go in and they attack the Mongol encampment. The Mongols initially retreat. And then the boyars. Yeah, I love greedy little fucks that they are decide hey these mongols have been looting and pillaging and burning and taking

everything for this entire duration so their camp is absolutely stacked with loot we're gonna start taking stuff from it because now it's all these riches that we're gonna be able to enrich ourself with mongols double back encircle them do a counter attack wipe out the entirety of the boyar elite and at that point it breaks pretty much all resistance this is their entire military basically their entire military from here they can rally around several other princes that try to raise forces in here but they don't have an actual strong class of warrior to draw from besides the boyars the greatest strength defensive strength that they ever had was the fucking environment and the mongols just completely skip past that in the first place because it doesn't

matter for them and they they start conquering everything they burn every single so they go to kiev and they burn it to the ground they burn every single city that they come across if they don't immediately surrender. Yeah. And the whole point is if they surrender, the local elites are allowed to stay in charge. They're allowed to keep their local customs. The only thing that they have to do is they have to pay a tax basically to the Mongols and also give them men for their armies. Literally worship whatever god you want do you because gangas khan as his is like i just want every uh god or anyone to be happy with what i'm correct so they they do all that and they just

move on and on and on and on it gets to a point that they've conquered pretty much the entirety of kiev and rus and then something happens and this is what always ends up happening ends up stopping the mongols the khan dies so the problem is is that when the great khan dies they have a i can't remember the exact name it's like a cool tie it's something along those lines where it's essentially a semi-democratic process where the great war leaders semi-democratic where the toughest guy gets to rule next pretty much pretty much and female in this time which is crazy is female had a lot of they did they did a lot of fucking power they would all go back to karkurum which that would be the one permanent permanent settlement established in mongolia and from there they would vote for who is going to be the next Khan if a heir had not already been designated. And so this means that the majority of forces were left and the Khanate,

the great Khan empire, then splits into multiple parts where you have what ends up controlling large parts of Eastern Europe there at that point is the Golden Horde under a descendant of Genghis Khan. And for the next hundred odd years, the Golden horde under a descendant of genghis khan and for the next hundred odd years the golden horde is essentially the kingpin of the entire region of just step nomads living around northern crimea going into ukraine and others that are if you don't pay us we're gonna come in and burn all your shit to the ground until under muscovy which recognize the name muscovy moscow the grand prince of muscovy ends up uniting all the varying peoples and then is able to take the fight to the step nomads and drive out the golden horde and from there that is what establishes the state of Muscovy that would eventually form Russia.

I love this shit. I'm so happy right now. I'm so happy. That's the phrase step nomad. Yeah. Step nomad. The step nomads were bending everyone over and fucking them right in the rear. Yes.

Step nomad is now a new shirt. We're definitely doing that. You do that on my channel. I'm going to have a shirt that says Step Revolutionary. So that is how that whole thing went down. What are you doing, Step Rebel? I just love that that was what was going on between the Mongolians and Russians for thousands of years. Yep.

And then Western Europe. Oh, it wasn't even thousands of years. It was just a period of a couple hundred years because the Mongols swept out of the East, almost basically unchallenged. And they reached all the way going down into the Middle East until the Battle of Angelot. That was the battle. It was the Battle of Angelot in which the Mamluks of Egypt. The Mamluks.

The Mamluks. Does your wife know you're autistic? Yes. Okay. My wife fully acknowledges and knows that I'm autistic as fuck. Speaking of which, you know what we need to get? Learning. Fucking history

doc. You haven't watched many unsubs, have you? Clips. Okay, so you don't know about this. So we have our own superhero group there we go called the offenders similar to the justice league or the avengers um here's the deal a little slightly different you get to pick your superpower okay don't tell me we get to pick the offset okay so for example eli i am crime cook i can travel at the speed i'm the flash i just can't interact with any object for five minutes after i've he exits super speed yeah cody get to the cody that's my favorite because cody he has the power of flight

as long as he's yelling racial slurs i'm uh i have like professor magneto but it's only for like the 15 to 30 seconds after i come so i'm like post nut clarity man xavier xavier sorry and i have the power where i can travel through time and space and switch places with anyone or anything. But every other time I take the place of a sex toy. So we need you. And I do agree with the amazing community out there. Got a drink. Community.

Community. That we can start at there's too many powers and like people can just say one we just get a new offset yeah yeah i like that pick any power and superpower okay it's gonna sound fucking dumb in here but uh one of the things that i've been called as an insult in the past is a wikipedia historian okay uh so i i i would say and if i can provide a little bit of an impetus here for the offset of this is that i would have basic knowledge of every single thing on earth but even in regards to modern events or anything when it happens it's almost like 2020 site it is uh it has to be with it i don't get that knowledge until 24 hours after it actually happens, so I wouldn't

be able to help if something has happened instantaneously. Hold on. So what's the superpower? All the knowledge. So you pick a power. A power. A random thing for it to actually be. We pick the option.

Any superpower you would like. You said the knowledge of anything in the world. Yes, literally knowledge of anything in the world. Like, almost like telepathy, of like, if something is happening or something has happened, I can sense and read it.

You're like the smartest human in... But I can sense it. I can read it. I can understand it. Just knowledge of history? No, no. Literally anything as it's happening. Think of like Charles Xavier, where it's like almost the whole thing with telepathy, where it's like he is able to-

But yours is knowledge. Like anything written down or that's happening. I can literally sense, know, and understand anything. Okay. I like that. Okay. At all times? At all times.

Like as it is happening, like I could sense that something is happening and be able to read it. So I'm like I think of telepathy. It's in braille it starts popping up as a rash on my body and i just have to touch myself i have to be touching myself until i read it i was gonna go way more aggressive let me hear yours i was gonna say that you're incorrect exactly 50% of the time, and you blame the wrong. Wait, turn your mic. There you go.

Sorry. Let me fiddle with these. Oh, my God. No, you have it. 50. No, no, you have to. 80% of the time, it is right. Oh, my.

Mine was getting worse. I know, but I like it where everyone trusts him that much more and tell he's wrong. Because then it's way worse when it is that 80, 90% where they're like, oh, man, he's like a really good superhero. But that 10% really fucking sucks. Yeah, exactly. Fuck! For the telepathy, like I can read someone's mind and it ends up being something completely different.

Like it was a false memory of a dream they had rather than their actual thought i was gonna say you were you were 80 80 correct like the you were 80 correct but never mind i'm not gonna say no i'm not gonna i'm not gonna finish do it we'll finish that no i'm not going to finish that. Do it. Finish that. No, I'm not going to. No, if he's helping us, he's like, well, this guy's this, this, this. And then there's that one piece of information that is very wrong. You don't understand. Because you don't know where to trust him. You're like, from. You just want, like, us as a group.

Where do we trust him? From videos between my wife and I here, right? One of the big things that got us big in the first place was her asking me questions. The amount of times that we were accused of like setting up something of her just asking something and it's like, oh, I already had a pre-rehearsed answer. They have no idea how many videos she would ask something. And I would just go, I don't know what the fuck you just said. I don't know what that specific thing is. So we'd only post specifically what that is.

But there is no guarantee since all that is off the cuff that what i have said is technically speaking correct it's only the immediate knowledge that i have at that exact moment pulling out of my ass to answer the thing from the camera that has just been shoved in my face you never know i feel like i like 90 of the time he's right because he's gonna kill us that 10 of the time and it is detrimental when we trust him and then we stop trusting him i know the offset hold on i know the offset you know everything okay but it's only after gabby asks you and she's mute. So you're playing the board game where she has to act out the question for you

to be able to get the information. No, it's charades. She has to do charades. She's doing charades where you're trying to get the question. He always lands on Gabby. Wouldn't it be the counter being that I'm mute? Wouldn't the counter be that I'm mute so i have to like

act out whatever is fucking gonna happen what i've seen happening you have to understand what she means and we have to reinterpret it she's mute he's blind telephone she's mute he's blind then we can't he can't see like sign language or anything she's just signing to him and he's like alright do it again and she can't communicate with anyone else so she has to learn braille what is the movie I think it's Eddie Murphy and the guy

that plays Willy Wonka Gene Wilder yeah he's Gene Wilder who plays that have you seen that movie it's so good that's you guys that's your superpowers I love them's so good. That. That's you guys. That's your superpowers. I love them landing together. I'm like, fuck, this is gonna be a while.

He's so smart. Jesus Christ. How do I kill this bad guy? You guys are trying to figure it out. Playing charades the entire time. She's making fucking license plates for Braille. He's feeling it out. I don't fucking understand that. Kill. Kill. Oh, no! for Braille he's feeling it out oh no

that's not how he sounds we can't understand third layer of we're like what the fuck did he just say? I'm Anne Frank We've doubled back to be saying something much worse Diary that nobody finds for 40 years With telepathy awesome great, Great to know. Come on. You know everything, but you have to be in an attic. Not even yet. Better yet, I'm in a fucking insane

asylum strapped up inside this here. I can sense anything and everything that's going on around me. Can't interact with the world. Just like a little attic he's stuck in. Shit. Holy shit. going on around me can't interact with the world just like a little attic he's stuck oh shit holy this is uh this has been a great episode very happy with this one good job it's been something it is this is this is peak uh this is peak do we close out and go to the after show yes all right close this out once again thank you for joining us for the Unsubscribe podcast. I am joined by Eli Doubletap, the fat electrician, Stephen from the History of Everything podcast.

And I am your hero, King Trout, donut operator. That's right. He served in the military. Fish operator. And we're going to give him a veteran. Trout nut. I broke my spine. Going to be a Navy SEAL

just adding more into it make sure you check us out on the after show where you're going to talk about I have no fucking clue but it's uncensored way more fun we're going to fight about Hirohito more wait hold the fuck up where do we find you at in your own voice

literally anything from me here so I have two channels as it is. Snakuyi when it comes to TikTok. Spell it out. S-T-A-K-U-Y-I. That is what I originally got started on when it came to TikTok. And then also I do a gaming history channel when it comes to that here that's on YouTube. So it's a lot of Paradox titles.

Wait, what the fuck's that about real quick? I do a lot of alternate history and I utilize gaming as a medium to answer what if. So like what would have happened if X happened? And I use gaming as a medium to explain that for alternate history. And then simultaneously the History of Everything podcast, which on YouTube is now stemmed into a lot of modern like geopolitics and explaining, okay, how the fuck did we get here? Like the whole thing with Japanese remilitarizationization which is one of the most recent things or the latest episode that i posted which is why the fuck the taliban is probably going to cause the first ever water war in modern history we're going to talk about that because what yeah join us on the after show kisses Thank you. We'll see you again.