Unsubscribe Podcast - 184 - How A Career Criminal Changed His Life ft. JD Delay | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 184

Episode Date: October 29, 2024

Our boy  @JdDelay5150  is here to talk prison stories, woodchippers & overcoming addiction. ONLY A FEW LIVE SHOW TICKETS LEFT: https://unsubcrew.com/liveshows Watch this episode ad-free and uncensored on Pepperbox! https://www.pepperbox.tv/ WATCH THE AFTERSHOW & BTS ON PATREON! https://www.patreon.com/UnsubscribePodcast FOLLOW JD: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwwRzW41YdhO2O0klNkttUA https://www.instagram.com/jd_delay https://www.tiktok.com/@jddelay5150 ------------------------------ THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS! UNDERDOG Go to https://underdogfantasy.com and use the code UNSUBSCRIBE to get up to $1000 in bonus cash! SHOPIFY Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/unsubpod ------------------------------ UNSUB MERCH: https://www.bunkerbranding.com/pages/unsubscribe-podcast BUY US A DRINK! https://paypal.me/UnsubscribePodcast FREE TO USE MEDIA (Please tag Unsubscribe Podcast) https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1uppmQHMGf8uI2OuOatp932e3S2VGy0PE?usp=sharing ------------------------------ FOLLOW THE HOSTS: Eli_Doubletap https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://www.twitch.tv/Eli_Doubletap https://x.com/Eli_Doubletap https://www.youtube.com/c/EliDoubletap Brandon Herrera https://www.youtube.com/@BrandonHerrera https://x.com/TheAKGuy https://www.instagram.com/realbrandonherrera Donut Operator https://www.youtube.com/@DonutOperator https://x.com/DonutOperator https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator The Fat Electrician https://www.youtube.com/@the_fat_electrician https://thefatelectrician.com/ https://www.instagram.com/the_fat_electrician https://www.tiktok.com/@the_fat_electrician ------------------------------ unsubscribe pod podcast episode ep unsub funny comedy military army comedian texas podcasts #podcast #comedy #funnypodcast Chapters: 0:00 Welcome To Unsub! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why do fintechs like Float choose Visa? As a more trusted, more secure payments network, Visa provides scale expertise and innovative payment solutions. Learn more at Visa.ca slash fintech. I mean, there's f***ing in prison, but it smells like s*** and it comes with a kickstand you gotta push back. Oh yeah, why trash s***? It's a medicinal wood chipper.

He's cured! I can bend over, squat and cough with the best of them, brother. He is super kind. You guys want to do this late? The gang plays hide and seek with J.D. DeLay. Everyone, are we ready? Get that thing ready. You fingernails.

There we go. Three, two, one. Mmm. Mmm. Oh, fucking peach. Just a disappointment. No, we got another one. Wait. Do we have a non-peach, good sirs?

Non-peach! Non-peach! Non-peach! Mulligan. Redo. That's a boot. And drink. Wow, is that sanitary? You're going to make him drink it out of the boot? I know. Connor, I can't drink this. It's leather. Sorry, it's bobbling.

Hammering in souls. It's the manliest version of knitting available. Geppetto lives here. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the unsubscribed podcast i am joined today by eli double tap nick the fat electrician jd delay and myself donut operator thank you so much for tuning in watching all of the things that we do yay holy shit nick's the one that yeah you got brought up a couple of times then magically just sent it immediately afterwards. Like,

Hey, perfect. Yeah. I've been like feverantly hounded to try to get on your guys podcast. Like we have a lot of crossover, I think. And, uh,

people just asked me repeatedly, like, when are you going to be on the unsub podcast? And I'm like, let me just hit them up. Cause I have everybody's phone number. And then I went and looked on Tik TOK and Nick nick was actually following me so immediately i hit him up i'm like hey buddy and here i am poof as if by some form of magic i am at your table dude and you

get to hang out with the guys see the chaos you watched cody cook today yeah don't jesus yeah i feel like hanging out with you guys for like a couple of hours was like watching the Boofing Olympics. It was really good. I did put a grilled cheese in my ass. Yeah, I think he took the gold. Yeah, we did it. Okay, JD, what are you known for, man? What are you known for on YouTube?

So, like, look, man, I was a career criminal for about two decades. I was a drug addict. And today I am a recovery coach. I help people get out of that same lifestyle and that misery and that cycle of addiction and breaking generational curses. But mainly I'm known on YouTube for yelling at my cell phone

and having weird nipples. Okay. Are they weird? I mean, they're pretty weird. They're not weird. Is this going to screw up the monetization? We'll blur it. That's fine. Yeah, just blur out those nips.

Yeah, blur those nips. I was hoping they were weird, like one inch long and they curved down. Gravity effects. I was like, those are weird nipples. You're printing through your shirt. So, like, look, I can hang Christmas ornaments off of them, but I can't hang, like, coat hangers with, like, a Burlington Coat Factory coat off of them. I've tried. We've done the science. The science works every time.

You still got that fish wear in the garage? We're going to find out how many pounds. Yes. What the fuck? What? Here's a cheers to our boy for coming out, being on. we appreciate you taking

the time out boom hanging with us oh tequila okay i made the right choice i'm trying to wake up i'm like oh and for those at home i'm drinking an energy drink because i don't drink alcohol anymore which is smart you're you're killing it we've had like now three four guests that don't drink and they stick to it even gary from nerd roddick he was big on like yeah no booze for me he's he stays it he writes his um he does his journal entries like positive thinking and all that stuff because he also went to prison did the exact same thing like his was running drugs and then turned his life around now he does youtube

nerve videos yeah i super don't want to go back to prison i'm not like the biggest fan of showering with other dudes i've legitimately seen like probably 10 times more dicks than jana jameson or any of uh model on the miles it's just not something i'm trying i don't need any more miles uh of dicks you know and also there's there's lots of fun stuff like having to ask cops for toilet paper. No offense to the cops in the building, but... I wouldn't give it to you. I know you wouldn't, you son of a bitch. So, you know,

it's much better out here where there's **** in stake. I mean, there's **** in prison, but it smells like **** and it comes with a kickstand you gotta push back. It's just not my thing. If that's your thing, it's okay. It's okay. Bro, what?

Yo, prison smells like shit, dude. Yeah, dude. That is not. Connor is, he's not cobbling anymore. Would you like some toilet paper? That toilet paper gave me a tingle, boy. Oh my God uh so how long ago did you get out or last time you did your stint and then when was that turning point for you it's like i'm gonna try something else so i'm irish uh i got it tattooed right here when i was still drinking

so i wouldn't forget uh which means i'm a hard learner and also I have an extra medium size. We're not going to talk about that. Um, and I can't dance, uh, but the hard learner thing. So I went to prison in 2006, got out, I graduated in 2010. Um, and you'd think that like going to prison and having all these horrible things would be enough for me to like learn things that I should avoid. Not really. I did good for a couple of years and, uh, you know, went right back to the same stuff, ended up getting in trouble. I was a fugitive for, uh, about nine years. I had to fly out of the state of Oregon to the state of Florida. Cause there's

no extradition Oregon and Florida don't do business. They don't like each other. So, um, hung out there on the beach for nine years instead of going to prison for 10 years. And, uh, eventually the secret service and the SWAT team blessed me with the desperation and the willingness to change my life. I got a really awesome opportunity from a judge who told me, you know, I'm going to let you out of jail to go straight to treatment. And if you screw me on that, I'm going to bury you. And treatment really changed my life. It was really a game changer. And I re I embraced recovery wholeheartedly in, uh, 2019. Um, I took that opportunity and I just, I fought for my life because I knew where I didn't want to live anymore. And I knew who I didn't want to be anymore,

but I didn't know how to do any of this legal shit that I do every day. You know what I'm saying? I didn't even know how to be okay in my own skin without something in me. So I really spent like six months hyper fixating on what is fucked up in me and how do I fix it? And how do I be a better person? And then I started focusing on how do I help other people? And so I became a recovery coach, a peer support recovery specialist, a smart recovery facilitator. I started two community outreaches, one where we distributed Narcan during the pandemic because yo, the, the overdose epidemic in the area in Florida, I was in just skyrocketed because people couldn't get to their meetings. People couldn't

socialize. People couldn't have their support. So we were able to make a little dent in that in Volusia County, where I lived over there in Daytona beach. Shout out to Sheriff Mike Chitwood who helped out with that. Chitwood's awesome. Yeah, dude. No, and like, yo, they investigate. His office investigated me for over a year and ended up not getting the charges they wanted on me. And still, when I hit Chitwood up and I said,

hey, I'm trying to distribute Narcan to the places that no one else will go. He hit me back. He's like, is this the delay that we've been? I'm like, yeah, that's me. And he's like, I'll help you with whatever you need. And, uh, you know, I was able to prove myself COVID really saved my life. And I feel terrible about saying that because I know it was so catastrophic for so many people, but for me, it bought me 20 months where there were no in court, like in person court appearances, and they're not going to like cuff you up on a zoom hearing. So all it was was zoom hearings. It bought me 20 months to be able to prove myself and change my life. I became the

go-to person for the local news when they wanted to talk about overdose or fentanyl or, you know, recovery and addiction. So, you know, by the time I went back into the judge, uh, he was like, what, what are we going to do with you? And I was like, look, I earned prison. I 100% deserve prison. My, my actions bought that ticket. I'll ride the ride, or you could give me house arrest and you could let me continue to work on myself and the community. And, uh, he gave me that opportunity with the stipulation that if I ever came before him again, he would bury me like full exposure. He'd run everything, you know, to the absolute max and he'd stack everything. And he said, you sure I'll give you two years prison right now or I'll give you two years house arrest and two years probation.

And I was like, I'll bet on myself. And I did go back and see him. I ended up going back and seeing that same judge. His name was Matt, Matt Foxman. Really cool dude, man. That judge saved my life by giving me the opportunities he gave me. But I ended up being a court liaison because I worked for two different treatment facilities. And I would get to go in there and propose to Judge Foxman that other people get the same opportunity that I got and say that we had a bed open for these people and get people out of jail so that they could just come and do treatment. And, you know, sometimes it works and it sticks for people and sometimes it doesn't, unfortunately.

Is it when you see what sticks or what works? Because treatment has what percentage of actually like, hey, this guy stuck to the program after finishing it. I don't like statistics because it can be really demoralizing to people. You know, when I when I went and sat down, they told us, OK, so look to your left and look to your right, because one third of you are going to make it. And, you know, the other two thirds are either going to be in prison or more than likely they're going to be dead. And I've seen miracles happen in people that when they walked through those doors, I absolutely did not believe that they're going to be dead. Um, and I've seen miracles happen in people that when

they walked through those doors, I absolutely did not believe that they were going to make it. And I've, I've seen people that I absolutely thought were going to make it fall off and not even, not even make it through the program. So it really just depends on where you're at with your own self-seeking. Nobody stops before they're actually ready. Um, and it sucks because if you've got a loved one, it can be just agonizing watching your loved one beat the shit out of themselves and have these horrific consequences and like you're just i've been on both sides of this thing man you know but nobody's gonna stop until they're ready that's crazy because we got like your lifestyle is completely different than what we encountered oh cody you're doing leo for how many

years uh three years three years and then you you would see well you just on the other side of arresting but one big thing you uh preach is helping the community it's you're not enforcing like dumb shit yeah community oriented policing not just arresting everyone for dumb like using that officer discretion to not just throw everyone in jail and i've had it both ways man i've had cops that were super cool i've actually trauma bonded with several leos uh because they you know i had to call 9-1-1 because somebody's overdosing and you know sometimes the the officers get there before the paramedics do and i'm sitting there you know narcaning somebody and doing rescue breathing and they've, they've thrown up all over themselves and, you know, they've shit

their pants and it's just me and an officer in a tiny bathroom, just trying to save this person's life. Um, I've had officers give me awesome opportunities and I've, I've had officers cuff me up while I was on the ground and kick the out of me. So, you know, the, the thing with me is that I always took accountability for my actions. Like I knew when I was out there, there used to be an old school, uh, gangster type of street code where you, you owned your shit, you know, it's a game that you're playing and you're either better than law enforcement at that day or you're not, but you don't blame it on another man for being better at his job than you are. Um, and I think that's kind of a dying breed type of thing, that oldict code so i was going to ask you about that because i watched another one of

your interviews and i thought it was it was interesting to me because you were talking about like you were running from the cops and you were driving and you were talking about civilians implying that you're you're not a civilian so you kind of fully adopted the like i'm the cop or the robber in this situation everybody else's innocent bystanders it's him getting me i'm playing the game and that's kind of that old convict code yeah 100 man and like you know part of that convict code is that you don't you don't leave you leave civilians out of it you know what i'm saying like hurting women children the elderly uh uh, disabled animals, that type of thing. Like, that's like the number one rule. You leave them the fuck out of the

nonsense. Um, and you know, then there's no snitching beneath that, but like, just like, I think a lot of people these days listen to too much rap music and it's rotting their brains. And they think that like a civilian can snitch, like somebody who's not a part of the game can't snitch. And there's no way to snitch on somebody who's not a part of the game can't snitch and there's no way to snitch on somebody who's a child predator i've had people call me a snitch because i 100 i work to get child predators off the streets i work with law enforcement to do it i'm involved with that right now um we've we've got a dude who's a human trafficker who's he's literally uh got a life long restraining order from the boy scouts of America that he used to work for.

Do you know how fucking hard it is to get a lifelong restraining order? It has to be pretty nuts. But that's how I found out that the Boy Scouts of America have SAM insurance, abuse and abuse insurance. So that's a thing that churches and private schools and the Boy Scouts apparently have where you get this insurance and then if something happens somebody a kid they come in and they pay like a big amount to keep it quiet so it doesn't reflect upon their reputation in the community so um you know like child predators

it's always game on oh yeah you just got a nice beautiful new tattoo oh i did yeah the old wood chipper that says feet first and uh that's the mpaa for make afraid again that's kind of my merch is to make afraid again whole uncle chippy yeah buddy hell yeah i actually posted it to a community post to uh my youtube so that anybody in my community could get it because the people in my youtube community just who are savagely loyal by the way and they're awesome i don't consider my youtube community to be a channel that seems very one-sided you know we have to drink you send community um so uh i posted the outline to it so that anybody who wanted to get the pattern done could get the pattern because they started calling themselves the wood chipper tribe

so there's like a bunch of hellions out there getting this wood chipper tattoo and it makes my heart so happy we're the wood chippers so you're getting like just people mad that you have the audacity to not like oh i know you do yeah which people people tell on themselves in my comments like that but it's usually on tiktok it's not usually on youtube um usually i'll get people on tiktok that are like it's map minor attracted person oh god that sounds like i just asked them to post their address i'm like post your address i'd love to talk about this post your address this episode is presented by underdog turn your takes into cash by picking higher or lower on your favorite athlete's stats underdog is available in more than 30 states including

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All my yen is on Japanese bug fights. My boy Senshi's got this next one in the bag. That's not even a thing. Well, tell that to his last opponent, Shin the Bagu. He did this to him in 30 seconds. I could do that to you in less. Not me. If you're rocking with our picks, remember to sign up now and use the code UNSUBSCRIBE

to get up to $1,000 in bonus cash and get a free pick. So head to the App Store and download Underdog today. Show some support to them for them showing support to us. Arigato gozaimasu! Well, what was crazy is hearing your story while in prison

with one of the interviews you were doing. The guy said that they're protected in certain areas for you like it's a hate crime protected crime to beat up you're talking about california they're a protected class in a lot of states and the states where they are a protected class tend to be the bluer states and uh the red states they don't get those same protections um you know they'll put them right in general population and they get fucked up and you're not getting no hate crime. The cops are over there high fiving each other behind your back on it.

And, you know, it was like that back in the day, back in, you know, when I was in prison in Oregon from 2006 to 2010, it feels like it was a little bit of a different era. You know, the COs were just letting shit slide, uh, quite a bit. And some CEOs were hella nice and cooperative. Like they'd be like, Hey delay, uh, dude in cell 13, you might want to go check his paperwork. And I'm like, you want to open his door for me? And she'd be like, I got you. And then I'd slide in there and, uh, you know, you slide in there, close the door behind you, ask him for his paperwork. The second he starts stuttering, you just beat the out of him, get his paperwork, take all his commissary and just yell, pop number three. And, you know, they're getting it bad in there.

They get treated really bad in prison. Everybody always asks me, why did he make it out breathing? Well, I was doing 39 months. I didn't want to catch the death penalty. It didn't seem like the thing to do. Because if you killed someone in prison, then that's what they were doing. They're handing out the death penalty. But we make sure that they live in fear.

In Oregon? Yeah. It's treated as, as you're saying, like it's just a hate crime? Or how are you describing on that one? Okay. So a lot of states, this is a newer thing where they're a protected class. If you protected class, if you assault them because of their crime against children,

it's considered a hate crime. If you judge them for their actions. Yes. Yes. Yes. It's like being born with a certain complexion or gender or anything like that. So,

you know, you can't discriminate against people for kids. It just, I guess that's it is what it is class yeah geez dude here's here's the work around wild wild i i'm i'm a reformed criminal but i am still a convict my felonies did not magically disappear so i'm going to tell you the workaround right here. What you do is you, you go, did you just call me a bitch? And then you hit them and you do whatever you want to them. As long as you voice something as a motivation, you know,

for the crime outside of their crime, you can still beat out of them. You just have to do something like that. So you could be like, no man, I, he, I thought he called me a punk.

You know what I'm saying? I thought he was trying to take my leather cheerio, your honor. This wasn't a hate crime. What do you mean? I didn't even know he was a Gerber baby groupie. So basically the prison, you know, in prison, you just, their lives weren't very comfortable. No, no, they can't. They never are allowed to have anything off canteen.

They get beaten on. They get are allowed to have anything off canteen. Um, they get beaten on, they get shit, uh, smeared into their food. Um, you know, any type of awful thing that you can do to them. Like literally there's chemicals down in laundry that people can soak clothes in instead of like washing them. And then when, when they start to sweat, the moisture burns will, will activate those chemicals and it, it gives them chemical burn all over their skin. You know, it's just actively, it was like a competition to see who could make these dudes the most miserable. God, that is just so really good. It's like, please, not just with the death penalty at this point.

I have 40 more years of this. Here's the problem. At least in the state of Oregon, like you're going to get more time for doing property crimes or drug crimes than you're going to get for hurting kids. I know that when I got sentenced to 39 months in prison and I want to stipulate this, I'm not complaining about my sentencing. I feel like I got a really good deal. I earned every single day of that. I deserve to be taken off the streets. And honestly, if they hadn't taken me off the streets, I would have hurt myself or somebody else in a way that i would not be able to live with today

but the dude who got sentenced before me had two forcible on a four-year-old and he got six months in uh county jail and six months probation he got less than you i stole three hondas and I got 39 months in state prison. And, uh, I believe like 12 months probation after that. Um, yes. And the judge told him, the judge gave him,

uh, 60 days to get his affairs in order before he turned himself in, which is why when they arrested me and I went back, I didn't get to beat him up. I really wanted to beat him up, but he got to walk out to courthouse that day. I asked for 60 days to get my affairs in order they're like absolutely not the judge the judge told me that um i i was going to go to prison i was going to get out do more meth and that i'd end up dying

that way and my mom's in the background just crying like and the other guy was going to quit assaulting kids yeah it's like he's not gonna he's not going to go back out there and just start f***ing kids again. Which I have a very high ratio of. They're not going to stop it. There is a 100% effective treatment for p***y. And it is the

wood chipper, just so everybody knows. Why Gary why? Yeah, absolutely. He had a very effective manner too. You know, you can just put, just double tap them, just to be sure. And then they're not going to hurt any more kids. What do we do if a dog brutally attacks a kid? That dog generally usually gets put down. Why aren't we doing that to grown-ass people?

I have no arguments against that. I know. I'm just like. Yes. it's awesome to hear that it's like just going back a little it is you still own your mistakes and that's how you really push through and now you're i mean you're fucking crushing it i guarantee youtube was probably a big surprise for you on like new income and this new opportunity to grow bro i've been blessed way beyond anything that I ever expected for myself. I was stoked just not to go to prison. I was stoked to wake up and not need to grab a meth bong and hit a torch and, you know, get myself right every, you know, hour.

And the freedom that I have, like, honestly, I was so slaved out to little bags of substances that I felt more free in prison, clean and sober than I did on the streets, strung out doing crimes. And I had all the, I wasn't one of those people who's like, fuck, where am I going to get my next fix? Like I was very good at crime. Like, that's why I was a prolific criminal. I was, I got, I made money, but, um, you know know for the catalytic converters he took the whole car

yeah no absolutely i don't know he just walks away with the car i just don't know how to cut a catalytic converter i'm just taking the whole thing you do what you want with it um but, I know I've been so entirely blessed, bro. Um, it's been such a wild ride. So part of the getting house arrest was that I had two years to just work and focus on myself, like after all the treatment and everything. And like, I worked really heavy in recovery, but like really, I was only bringing home $300 a week from working at a treatment center. So I started my own recovery coaching business, but taking people out of the bushes outside McDonald's and helping them get clean, isn't super lucrative. Like it's just not. So, um, what I ended up doing was I always

had to have a job that supported my job, helping other people in addiction. And for a long time, it was a moving job in the state of Florida and the state of Florida is hot. I don't know if anybody's ever been there, but they only have two seasons, hotter than hell and hurricane season and hurricane season is still hotter than hell. So don't let it fool you. And, you know, it was a brutal job, you know, working 15, 18 hour days. And, but it supported my, my lifestyle of trying to help other people. And I just started making content cause I was on house arrest and, um, you know, I was trying to promote an album that I made that I recorded while on house arrest.

That wasn't all that good. Um, but I liked it. Uh, and I was trying to do that on social media. And then I just started posting some random videos myself and all of a sudden oh shit that video has 1.5 million and i have 150 000 followers on on uh tiktok how many how many subs do you have on youtube right now uh youtube i'm at uh 1.2 million uh when did you start youtube you got that really fast 18 months ago. That's really fast. For a million, that's really fast. Yeah, so. Got us beat. We're almost three years here and half a million. Honestly, I'm really blessed that so many people have been able to vibe with my content.

When I first started on TikTok, I wasn't even talking about. My first viral video was I was on house arrest in the state of Florida. Super cliche already, but we were jamming out to Limp Bizkit. And I was getting tattooed by a dude who was fresh out of prison with a gold grill. And I'm like, this is the most Florida moment ever. So I grabbed my phone and held up the monster. And I'm like, if you ain't in Florida on house arrest, getting tattooed in your living room to Limp Bizkit, where the fuck you at? Oh yeah, white trash shit. ass getting tattooed in your living room to limp biscuit where the fuck you at and oh yeah white

trash my tattoo artist is in the background going and uh it was just the most florida moment ever and i woke up the next day i posted it got like tattooed for hours till i just passed out and like a you know blood and ink and woke up the next day and it's like oh that is 1.5 million views and fred durst commented on it. And Little Aaron and nothing nowhere. You had Fred Durst comment on it? I had Fred Durst comment on that. Like, I've been a fan of his forever.

I went to Ladies Night in Cambodia to her on Nine Hits of Acid, bro. So I was like, this is dope. And so, yeah, it just took off from there. And, you know, somebody suggested to me that I move over to YouTube because I had gotten my account banned three times. Oh, I bet. I think the last draw was it was a couple of months before October. And I was like, hey, everybody, if you want a great idea for Halloween decorations in your yard now. And by the time Halloween hits, they'll be just spooky enough.

And they were like banned so you know i i had to keep doing my accounts over and now i've i got banned like right when i hit 1.1 million on the main account but i just weapons grade harassed them like like honestly bro anybody else would have got a restraining order and it would have stuck but i kept emailing them 15 times a day and then all of a sudden my account popped back up, but I built a backup account during that period of time. So I've got one with 1.6 million and one with like almost, uh, almost 600,000 for a backup. Um, but it's truck month at GMC tackle the open road with added confidence in a 2025 Sierra 1500 pro graphite at 0% financing for up to 72 months.

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YouTube was the absolute game changer that's i mean that's it makes every it's that change in content that's what nick started going to youtube after coming down the first time he's like okay hey do long form he did long form yeah immediately blew up and we're like god damn it now he's dwarfing everyone on viewership a month like you guys murder it bro you guys are doing great well this is like you said it's having a loyal community um if you i know if you have a loyal community that will you can do a lot more because then they're actually sticking with you through everything like holy shit they want to do x y z but it's involving them and then probably what you guys do i guarantee you involve your uh the group of people that watch you and they tighten it discord anything like that yeah yeah absolutely i've i've got the best mods on the planet love you guys uh and they also run my

discord um super cool people it's crazy because i've got a lot of demographic a lot of my demographics in the u.s but i've also got a lot in the uk a lot in canada uh the netherlands like south africa i never thought somebody who used to like spend hours at a time peeping through the blinds in some crappy roach motel because i'm high on meth and i think the cops are in the bushes i never thought that i would be reaching people on a global level like that shit's pretty wild that's quite the contrast there's millions of people listening to me no really yeah now it is true yeah now it is true i literally can't count the amount of times i've heard an officer say bend over spread your butt cheeks and cough now turn around and lift your boys now run your fingers through your gums like bro you did the

reverse order that's not how we do this i'm not putting my fingers in my mouth after going through the shrubs down there bro oh dude speaking of gums and meth i want to ask you something it's a correctional officer told me this years ago, and I've told this story a couple of times. Where people who are really deep into meth, they go into prison, they have the scabs, and they'll take the scabs and they'll give them to other people to use them as dip in their gums because the chemicals are still there in the scabs. I was a tweaker for 20 years and you just taught me something i didn't know my friend that's amazing dude i had a correctional officer tell me that so like like

every tweaker gets a hyper fixation if you've ever seen somebody that's on meth you know all the cliches about how oh dude's out in his front lawn mowing the lawn with a vacuum cleaner at four in the morning. And he does it every day. Or there's other people who will dig through the carpet and they're just digging for hours thinking that they dropped some lost shard in there. And there's people that pick their face. A lot of those people who pick their skin think that there's shards growing out of their skin. But I don't get that weird delusional thing.

Like I'm super ADHD. So I grew up on Ritalin and a drug called siler they stopped giving to kids because it was right around it's gone now too yeah they're like oh shit that's way too high of an amphetamine to give to kids and so like for me um i seem high when i'm not high but if you guys saw me on meth i would just be like calm and calculated and i would be thinking about how to make money. And all I do is take another Honda. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, I would like to think that I matured as I've matriculated in my criminal career past prison. You know, I matured into fraud, you know, a lot more selling of drugs and counterfeiting. I was, I was a bit of an artiste when it came to counterfeiting. I, in fact, I gave you guys all a lesson in the kitchen earlier about, yeah, my, my son was over there writing down. I saw that and I apologize. He was like, which thing to clean the money. Okay. Like John stop. Yeah. So that was my, my latest bust. Um, the one that really got me in trouble in the state

of Florida was, um, you know, it was a sales and math. Somebody did a controlled buy on me. It was the dude that I really liked and trusted. I considered him to be a really good friend and my dog hated him. Always trust your dog guys. Uh, my dog knew that he was on some weird shit. Um, but I got, you know, that sales and meth, they hit me all at the same time because they'd been investigating me for like over a year and they hit me with the counterfeiting, the organized fraud. Uh, it was just a little stack of charges. Um, so, you know, as soon as they hit me on one thing, they just sort of dropped it all. Like I was literally like I bonded out and 30 days later they were like SWAT team was at my house trying to

get me on more charges um and the SWAT team's not very good at getting me i've been told i'm slippery um so one time i was actually hiding under a bunch of dirty laundry like i literally had dirty socks and underwear over my face and i could kind of see through my and the SWAT team's like roaming through the house and i don't know how they didn't find me under there i'm not a small person professional hide and seek yeah one time we missed the boys next time he's like skyrim they kept peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and white monsters in the attic in case I needed to hide out from them. J.D. Frank, ladies and gentlemen. The worst time.

So the SWAT team raided my work. I was bartending at an axe throwing bar. And I was the person who gave people instructions on how to throw axes recreationally. And I got really good at it. And when I would work at this know, how to throw axes recreationally. And I got really good at it. And when I would work at this place, I'd wear a kilt. So I'm in here, not incognito at all whatsoever, big ass tattoo dude, you know, and I'm teaching these, these dudes that are on leave in Daytona beach, like right on the tourist strip, how to throw axes. And we're over there just getting it. And, uh, one of my coworkers runs up and he goes, bro, the SWAT team's at the

front door and they got a picture of you and you need to get out of here getting it. And one of my coworkers runs up and he goes, bro, the SWAT team's at the front door. And they got a picture of you. And you need to get out of here right now. And my boss comes over and he goes, go out the back. I'll tell them you're at the other bar. So I'm running down the tourist district. It's called Seabreeze in a kilt from the SWAT team. And they ended up not getting me that time either. But I would always turn myself in.

I just wanted to pay my bondsman first so I could do the eight-hour walkthrough. That's the most, like, main character theft auto which one was it the one dressed ridiculous actually you're just a random you hit create character random okay i locked the kilt i'm currently in talks with them about having me be a character in GTA 6. They're not aware of it, but I've been talking to them. They haven't responded, but hey, think about it, Rockstar. Me? When Cody started his crazy business of podcasting,

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your AI powered all-star Shopify powers 10% of all e-commerce in the United States. And Shopify is the global force behind Allbirds, Rothy's and Brooklinen. My favorite companies. What is that? No clue, but they also power millions of other entrepreneurs across 175 countries because businesses that grow grow with shopify sign up for a one dollar per month trial period at shopify.com slash unsub pod all lowercase go to shopify.com slash unsub pod now to grow your business no matter what stage you're in go to shopify.com slash unsub pod so i don't know if you want to say we can believe it out do you have like a do you have the stats or a rough idea of like how many cars have gotten stolen how many high speed

chases have we been involved in how much so i money has been counterfeited i don't know um i'm gonna i'm gonna opt out of the how much money was counterfeited because the feds declined to pick up those charges. And they were only state charges because I believe the threshold is $20,000. And they can hit you with federal charges. And they were not able to assess that much money. So I'm just going to not give any estimates. $500. That's crazy. Go on.

What's up? $500. Wow. They found way more than that in the hotel. And the weird thing was that they got us in the parking lot and everything was inside the hotel. So it should have been constructive possession. And I totally had it all worked out because I'm a jailhouse lawyer. If you ask me, I'll tell you.

I learned all of this shit in prison. And I knew how to approach this to be able to get out of the charges. But one of the men that was my sponsor told me, how did it work out the last time you beat a case you were dead guilty of? And I'm like, I was high within three days. He goes, yeah. So do you think that you can continue to try to build things off a lie and shaking your accountability? And that's why I went and changed my plea and pled out to the judge and I just open plead I'm like you can literally he could literally give me whatever he wants um so it was it was really jarring but as far as high speed chases nine out of eleven and by the way two is the number two is

what sends you to prison uh the other one the other one I wasn't driving but they still hit me with it um so yeah nine out of eleven high speed chases as far as how many cars i stole i'm i i could no idea yeah no one knows that's great it's just that it is that god i can't it's terrifying i don't even know how to say it it's like that weird high speed chase tips and tricks yeah i know you got a couple so check it out you you might be depending on what type of car you're in you might be able to outrun them but like probably not and and you're never going to outrun the radio the radio is that shit you're never going to outrun now some places

will bring out the chopper if they bring out the chopper you may as well just do everything you can to ditch whatever you need to ditch a lot of the times when i would do high speed chases i wasn't even as worried about the get the stolen car as i was i got to get rid of this gun i've been a felon since i was 23 but like i didn't stop carrying guns bro what the fuck um so i'd have to ditch the gun and ditch the dough wait i thought those rules worked though oh yeah they gun control absolutely works wait that's illegal that's why I have a felony possession of a firearm charge you had a gun what that's crazy you broke the law

yeah uh don't get me started on gun control like when I was a criminal I was all for gun control because then the people who I was like stealing their cars aren't gonna run out on their front lawn and shoot me in the face. Like I deserved bro. Now that I'm, I'm, I consider myself a law abiding citizen.

I'm 100% for everybody having full rights to protect their property and their family and their person from scumbags like I used to be. So, um, Whoa. Yeah. Tips. Yeah. You're not going to outrun the chopper get rid of your shit get out of the car as quickly as possible try to hide under some if they have thermal readers or

whatever you're you're probably cooked but um if they don't bring out a chopper you're not going to beat the radio so what you gotta have they brought out the chopper on you i've never had the chopper brought okay i oregon like eugene like Eugene doesn't deploy chopper. I was going to ask what's, what's that feeling? Like as soon as you hear the chopper over your fucking head, never, never had the chopper deployed on me. Thank goodness.

Let's knock on wood because I'm not dead yet. But, um, yeah. So, uh, the main thing is that you're going to have to out crazy them, uh,

because they're, you're never going to beat that radio. But if you make yourself enough of a liability, like they assume liability at a certain point. So you out-crazy them. You go down one-way streets the wrong way. You get into bike paths and sidewalks. And you run red lights. And they pull back the chase.

Because at some point, you're just becoming too much of a liability. You've got to play chicken liability liability cares less about civilians yeah and and like here's the thing is i care heavily about whether i hurt anybody else but i have like zero self-preservation for myself that's why i ate uh a lot of dairy earlier today when i'm super lactose intolerant and did war crimes on your guys's bathroom in here. That's every lactose person on the planet. Every single one. Nobody with lactose intolerance takes it serious.

None of my friends can eat fucking dairy, I swear to God. I can. I proved that today. Thank you, Nick. Look at me. Don't heart check me with cream cheese, good sir. Guns. Organ, I think that organs in the process of

potentially allowing felons to like regain gun rights so they actually are giving felons gun rights back even if you haven't gotten all of the felonies off your record you can apply to get your gun rights and um it's really all about what you're doing in your life how long it's been since you've uh done any crimes what types of crimes you had so if you used a gun in a crime they're less likely to give you your gun rights back i think that makes common sense which is crazy as fuck for oregon to do that but um yeah so there's a potential for me to actually be able to get my guns right back gun rights back on a state level. The feds absolutely not.

So how does that work? Like in, in Oregon, you're good, but you just couldn't carry outside of Oregon or are you potentially at risk in Oregon still? So I would be potentially at risk anywhere. And if they give me my gun rights back, my gun will not leave my home. Now, my wife is not a felon and my wife can carry. My son is not a felon and my son 1000% carries. My dad lives right next door and he is a PTSD full combat Vietnam Marine veteran who is armed to the teeth.

I am not armed and there's no guns in my home. But if they would allow me to have a gun in my home, I would 100% keep it there. And I wouldn't be carrying out in public. Now, can you, I don't know if you even can talk about it. If your wife, can you have one in the home since your wife legally can have one, but then you cannot. If it was in a safe that I do not have access to, but if they wanted to push the issue, see, I don't, I don't even Jaywalk anymore. You know what I'm saying? The sketchiest things that I do not have access to, but if they wanted to push the issue, see, I don't, I don't even Jaywalk anymore. You know what I'm saying? The sketchiest things that I do is,

uh, you know, this, this, this podcast, you guys, uh, puts me at great risk.

There is literally an officer over there. I'm on probation. Um, but we talked about it on the camera. I was like, do you want to see my probation travel lesson? Rich has just been sitting there with a baton, slapping his hand. He's just waiting for me.

The hall monitor. Get him. Rich, you hand your concealed carry to him. Hey, check this out. Gotcha, bitch. If the feds were to come to my house and want to talk to me about some of my content which i've been seeing a lot of footage of fbi agents wanting to come talk to people about you know you posted this you you posted that you wanted to put a

wood chipper and we found a that was uh chum the other day and we wanted to talk to you about it i don't see that happening you know what i'm saying so i don't really see them coming to my house but um while i'm on probation medicinal wood chipper fuck off he's cured while i'm on probation i've asked my wife to abstain from having a firearm in the house just i i like to stay in full compliance with the law um smart yeah so here's here's my thing here's my consequences if i do anything wrong and that includes just even having negative contact with a police officer like i don't have to be charged i don't have to be arrested i literally you know i have to report any contact with a police officer to probation. And if it's negative, they could potentially violate me,

but I'm on an interstate compact from the state of Florida living in the state of Oregon. So they would transport me all the way across the country. Like as far as this continent reaches, uh, with a little black box, uh, have you ever seen how they transport inmates yeah it's it's pretty interesting so they put a chain around your waist with a little black box and so your hands are chained to your waist and then it goes down to your feet and your your feet are chained and you can't lift your hands higher than this and so they throw you uh sack lunches they generally have like an old bologna sandwich and like, uh, they have these, uh, oranges that are genetically engineered to be tiny and suck.

They're not the cuties. The cuties are amazing. And we don't, we don't chastise cuties, but, uh, and they'll throw that to you and they'll be like, here you go. And then you're like, you're in a white jumpsuit and you're like, I can't reach. If I could do this, I'd suck my own. Uh, and you're just i can't reach if i could do this i'd suck my own uh and you're just stuck trying to eat these sandwiches and then like they'll stop at every little like prison or county

jail along the way and they drop people off and pick people up and you know sometimes they'll be like okay sleep on this cement floor until you know the next transport comes it would be miserable like a seven day event yeah across the country and they like dude like so when i was on transport just from uh one side of oregon to the other when they sent me to gladiator school there was you're all in white jumpsuits and there was a dude you can't you can't get your jumpsuit off in this get up and so when they stopped to let us go to the bathroom this dude was like bro i really have to take a shit and they're like hold it hold it he couldn't hold it so he on the bus in a white jumpsuit and we still had like hours on this on this bus ride and it stank so bad and then the ceos were like what the fuck's wrong with you you couldn't hold it and he's like i tried to

tell you like i'm like we're the ones sitting back in the back with him you got what the hell they don't care rewind to gladiator school yeah so they call uh snake river correctional institution gladiator school um it's way out in the middle of the desert so it started off oregon tried to have pc uh where they would send all the pp touchers bro they were trying to send all of the playground extraction specialists to one place where they could keep them all so that they could keep them safe. So they made the nicest prison in the state, way out in Ontario, Oregon, in the desert,

and they called it Snake River. And then the... filed a lawsuit suing the state of Oregon for discrimination. You guys are discriminating against the stake yeah that was a mistake because the fence is keeping the wolves out okay this wasn't for us all right yeah they had this beautiful it looks like a college campus and it's really nice. And so then they sued, and they started integrating, you know, sending gang members.

So they're sending out and sending, like, straight. At first, they just started sending gang members there, bro. They're like, fine, fuck you then. You sued us. They sent straight gang members in there. I spawned on the special level. It's extra fun. Which was super fucked up at first, too, because everybody in prison starts seeing these gang members that are, you know, on good charges get shipped out to the place we all knew that they only send. Oh, yeah.

And they built two more complexes out there. So it's like one of the biggest. I think it's still the biggest prison in the state. I think it holds like over 3 000 people um so they have three complexes and the original one that they built is the nicest and that's honor housing which is where the majority of the chomos go because chomos never break rules they're just trying to survive um but uh it turned into gladiator child yeah it turned out it turned into gladiator school because it's way out in the middle of nowhere. Nobody ever gets visits.

It's mainly people from the Valley. So it's like your people got to ride nine hours out there to see you. The only way you're going to get drugs in there is through a CO. And most of those CEOs out there are, you know, from Ontario and they're, you know, they're big redneck dudes that, you know, if you do good business with them, if you've got the money, if you're going to help them make a forward payment that they couldn't afford before, you might be able to get some drugs in there. But like, there's not an overabundance like there are in most prisons in the state of Oregon.

So people just get feral and they just start fucking people up, bro. I got shipped out there. The first time I walked on that yard within probably 15, 20 minutes of walking on that yard, I watched a dude get stabbed repeatedly in his armpit. It hit an artery. I don't remember the bleed out. Break heel. Break heel. Yeah.

So and he he didn't make it until medical got to him. And he was a way bigger dude than the dude who stabbed him. It was a little gay kid that they kept. They kept making fun of him. They kept calling him a fig and telling him that they were going to make him pay. Eventually, he had just gotten tired of it.

He ended up getting a knife and he shook the dude's hand with his left hand and lifted it up and just got in there and got the dude. The dude didn't make it. That was my first day on the yard. You're all, you're all going on lockdown. So,

but for me landing there at gladiator school, it was kind of like a family reunion. Cause I walked into my unit and there's like three dudes that I know. And I'm like, yeah. And they're like, Hey bro, you've got big feet,

but we have these old ass Nikes for you. I'm like, I'll take them. And so it was pretty cool. So with that's what you look for yeah that was dope i got some dirty nikes that's pretty cool i mean i didn't expect three toilet paper but at least i got some dirty ass dad yeah with the stabbing i feel like tv and movies it's like every fight in a prison is immediately stabbing. Is that even remotely true?

I feel like there's a pretty big escalation of violence between like killing somebody, stabbing them multiple times and just getting your ass. It really depends on where you're at. Okay. And I'm going to, I'm going to say that like Oregon prisons are fairly soft compared to prisons in other places.

And there's way softer prisons than, than Oregon prisons. Like West coast prisons are pretty bang and they're pretty active but like down in california there's yards that uh they're you know they're no hands yards like so that basically means if you if it's worth fighting over you're stabbing that motherfucker and you're in violation if you fight with with hands it's supposed to cut back on the drama and the nitpicky so we're only escalating all the way zero or a hundred if it's not worth stabbing somebody if it's not worth catching a life

sentence for then you're not to be doing it because what happens if you if you do some dumb shit you know you could get people on lockdown you could start a gang war you can start a race war anything that puts people on lockdown disrupts operations and you've got heavy organizations in there that have going on like selling drugs or you know whatever they've got going on is that fairly effective and those that you know of having that policy of like if you're not willing to kill somebody over it don't fucking do it i really think it cuts back on a lot of the dumb yeah the reason i ask is because like that's fairly like that's kind of the same mentality behind like gun rights as far as like if everybody has a gun nobody's

going to do anything stupid unless it needs to go all the way stupid here's the issue with that is that uh you know prison much like our communities uh is full of people that are variables and liabilities because of their mental health. So you can't blame the gun for that. Like people need more mental health services. People need more resources. We need to be keeping better eyes on people. We need, you know.

Mental health. It's actually like approaching it. And you had that flip side. I know you talked about it on one of your episodes was going in from like the 12 the young kids that's the terrifying or the other individual you're interviewing said it was the children or those juveniles that were the scary ones that those would just escalate immediately because they don't have the idea of repercussions so it immediately escalate to stabbing or trying to kill somebody first off i swooned a little when you said you've watched one of my episodes i appreciate you uh but yeah no juveniles so um you know the juvenile

the jit camps is what they call them over in florida um them jit camps stay popping yeah you gotta say it with a little bit of florida when you talk about florida boy if you don't live there for a little bit you know who that picklewood ain't that jit over there so um yeah no uh the jet camps are are popping like that's where so it's kind of like have you ever heard that old analogy about snakes like venomous snakes uh you know if they're young they bite you and they just sink all their poison venom into you because they don't know any better it's kind of like that they're all out there trying to make a name for themselves you know they're they're all trying to prove who's the biggest and the baddest and that's part of what i hate about minimum custody uh prisons is there's all these people who feel like they need to prove

something there and then they get to a maximum security joint and it's like somebody sits down with them and they're like look if you act like this we're gonna dig around in your intestines with with a bone crusher. You know what I'm saying? Like you need to chill the fuck out. Um, when you're on a, a real prison yard, it's calmer, it's quieter, it's more respectful. And that's, that's even with, you know, no hands-free policy. Um, it's just so much more respectful when I was at OSP.

I don't know what it's going on there now. Cause it's, you know, been 14 years, but when I was there, they were pretty much like, they left us the fuck alone. Like they were not coming into our cell and tossing it, looking for tobacco or weed or shanks or anything like that. The only thing they really cared about is are they beating up COs? Are they stabbing COs? If they're going to fight between each other, you know, as long as it's a fight where you don't do it in front of us and make us do paperwork, we're, we're straight. So I thrived in that environment because I'm like really chill with not doing things on front street. Like I'll go take somebody into the cell or, and this is going to sound weird,

but you could take people down to the showers was a place where people used to fight a lot. Um, cause there was just a blind spot down there by laundry there was a level of that in tecum yeah yeah so the showers i know about the showers at osb are such a trip yeah the showers at osb are such a trip because it's just a long cement hallway with shower head shower head and this is the the distance between the shower heads you see my shoulders so i'm like there's yeah yeah and it's like when you go to turn it's like do i hit this dude with my dick or do i turn and expose my ass to him but there's a dude on either side so either way you're fucked bro prison showers are so awkward unless you're like a twiggy twink that's way rich what's the worst military showers because like our basic at i mean at Benning wasn't too bad. You had a

separator, but it was still wide open. The range at Fort Sill I vividly remember was if you had to take a shit and another you were touching triceps while you were Oh, it was back to back? Oh, no, no, no.

It was another big dude and me and another big dude over here just shitting with our triceps touching. Wiping was awkward. Oh. That's when you, like, go to check and you hit your buddy. There's no checking. There's no checking. I'm so sorry.

So, look, here's something I wanted to discuss with you guys. Absolutely. It seems, because i have a lot of people that are either you know active duty or veterans that are in my community i love them they're some of my favorite people i hung out with a lot of vets while i was in prison as well they acclimate perfect to that type of environment and they've talked to me yeah they've talked to me a lot vets are autistic people they've talked to me a lot about all the similarities. So there's, you know, uh, you guys have Jody's, we have Jody's, you know, it's whoever's keeping,

it's whoever's keeping your old lady warm while you're in there. Uh, and, uh, so you guys had strict structure and routine. Your guys is mess halls. Uh, you, how was your guys experience with the food? Uh, so, okay. okay so the perfect the perfect segue for this uh the food horrible usually at least at basic and stuff but like i i at least when i went through basic training and rich has gone through 12 years of being a drill instructor i'm sure he's seen it a ton i'd love everybody yell at me while i just pinch one nipple bro just yell at me just Just demean me. Call me names. That's why it'll never happen, friend. Oh my god.

I found Rich's Crypto and I finally said it out loud. You might have done it. It's this. The chow's made by the same companies. It's Sodexo. Is it really? Yeah. You didn't know this, but when I was in military training, man, we were both eating the same lunch. Hey, that's

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free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. The only real difference between prison and the military is everyone in the military has a gun. Yeah. pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. So there's so many similarities. Oh, it's the same thing, for sure. Yeah, you guys are considered government property. We're considered state or government property. My dad told me that he almost got written up for having a sunburn for damaging government property. And the same thing almost happened to me at Snake River when I first got out to the yard because I was pasty. I'd been locked up with no sunlight for a while.

I went out there and I got a really bad sunburn and the nurse was like, we could literally write you up for this. You've damaged state property, Mr. DeLay. And I'm like, can I have some aloe vera? She's like, no, there's ibuprofen on the canteen. Order it now. It'll be here in two and a half weeks.

Ibuprofen. Yeah. Ibuprofen for everything. Change your socks. Clean socks. Clean socks. You didn't get those. No, change your socks clean socks yeah clean socks didn't you didn't get those but no they give you clean socks they're just they've been worn by many other men you don't get new socks or new underwear bro you should have told him to subpoena the sun you know

ain't my fault lawsuit against the sun no when i was in a when i was in basic training all a bunch of people got like addicted to menthol cough drops because that was literally the only thing your family members were allowed to send that was any extra anything so you just had people sending like 20 bags of halls menthol cough drops and that was all anybody could have but everybody had cargo pockets full of halls menthol cough drops now but you guys were allowed like tobacco and shit right not uh that's like it's kind of it depends basic training no pretty much in not so yeah never basic training not at all uh ait once you go to so like it's basic training and then like your job training so like i went to medic school medic school you could have tobacco there was a smoke pit but you could only do it like after

the work day was over okay so you can get it eventually but that first three months basic right ish basics 10 weeks 10 weeks first 10 weeks wait now is it i thought it was 9 or 12 well wasn't it 12 it was 12 i don't know if it was 12 but it's just over 10 weeks now I've seen dudes do such desperation plays to get tobacco in there we had we had a CO that was everybody was like that dude is cool as shit

because he would chew and then he'd take his chew out of his lip and toss it at the wall so it would stick and dudes would go over there and scrape it off the wall and they would dry it out and then they'd roll it up in bible paper and smoke it and they'd be like yeah i'm like a lot of the tobacco if you're in a minimum custody joint the tobacco that you're smoking came in in a dude's asshole uh one time it came in in my asshole and that's how i met dr corn dog fingers and that's a really bad story but i would not smuggle in anything

anything how big the fingernail would be on a corndog bro i'm just i'm just saying if it's i have a question how many unsub episodes have you watched about six six have you ever done the offenders on any of them no you know No. Do you know about the offenders at all? The offenders is our superhero group. Think about Marvel, the Avengers. We're the offenders. We all have one superpower.

You get to pick your own superpower. We get to pick the offset. For example, Cody can fly, but in order to fly... I have to shout racial slurs. Makes flying less. Okay. I'm a, I'm a post nut clarity, man.

So I'm like professor X, but only for like the 30 to 45 seconds after I come. Okay. And then Eli, that's, that's a lot longer than it takes you to come. So I know that my utility belt's got like some orange juices and viagra it just it's a whole thing anyways go ahead i am a crime cuck i'm travel at the speed of light uh like the flash but then i can't interact with an object for five minutes after he leaves hyperspeed yeah so he kind of has to show up and witness the crime yeah you just show up and watch so uh what's uh what's your superpower is this is this a thing where you pick your own no you pick your own superpower and you get a pick now we've had to change it because everyone

so we pick the offset yeah okay um hmm i'd like to be uncancellable is that a thing is that a superpower you can't be cancelled no that's not you gotta be a superpower superpower nobody's making a movie about the guy that can't get cancelled I mean that's

I just picture it's a white dude get away with that? Okay, so I would like my nipples to be able to, you know, do some sort of projectile just like rocket nipples. Rocket nipples. Shoot spikes out of them? Yeah, bro, because I mean, they're definitely there. People tell me in every comment. Our superhero, high beam.

I just like, okay, so you have like cyclops power, but with your nipples. I can do double pulse. So you can't aim them, really. I mean, we don't have an offset. Your nipples are like this, so you're just kind of guessing where your lasers are going to hit. Yeah. You didn't say effective superpower. You can fly, but he has to do drive-by shoutings and cave people's feelings in. You know what I'm saying?

Don't move her. She gets it. She dies. Fine. You get to be high beam. High beam. don't move her she gets it she dies fine you get to be high beam anytime you want your powers to work you're stuck in that prison transport position

oh yeah I feel like that's how I would have to aim these things because they're cockeyed bro so you get them and then you get some actual true aim I feel like you just gave me the setup bro I feel like your superhero is the opposite And then you get some actual true aim. I feel like you just gave me the setup, bro. I feel like your superhero is the opposite.

I know. It's like, that's it. He doesn't need an offset. I can bend over, squat, and cough with the rest of them, brother. It just has long nipples. That's the offset. They're just six inches. Cody has to have his finger up your ass for your power to work. I don't know.

Oh, man. I've been ass for your power to work. I don't know. I've been waiting for this my entire life. We're flying today. Congratulations, you're Cody's deadly hood ornament. His neckles are flying everywhere. Quick, push my on switch. He's going to make me his human finger puppet. JD, not again.

Let me ask you guys this. If God's real and he loves me why did he put my g spot up my asshole that's why all guys ask if god loves me and he exists why couldn't i come on opiates it seems like it would be really fun to come on opiates but i could not make it happen looking trout right now playing chess by himself. I know. I was looking at that earlier. I was like, first he was cobbling boots, and now he's playing chess by himself. I'm sorry, heresy is occurring.

I just picture Trout's like, oh, good move, Connor. I didn't see that one coming. Do your next move. I love this. Oh, Connor. I didn't see that one coming. Do your next move. I love this. Oh, no. Cody, on your side of things, this is also with Rich, but with this, hearing the other side

of just that mindset and crime and everything from the police side where you're like, god damn it, I didn't think that way, or you had a pretty general idea of how criminals thought when you were solving crime. What was your question? How is it hearing this now? Sorry, how is it hearing this side of it in an interview setting sitting next to him?

I'll treat him with as much respect as he treats me, man. That's always how I treated people I arrested. I think Rich can agree. You just treat people with respect, they'll treat you with respect. Except child predators. Except the people.

And fucking child predators. No, they don't get the respect. But if a dude like him was like, yeah, I fucked up. We're cool. I'd be like, yeah, I'm cool too, man. Let's take a ride. Let's go to jail.

I was just kidding. Let's just go to jail real quick. I got a good bondsman. I'll be out in eight hours. What's your favorite song on the way to jail? The gang goes to jail. Can you get me down there in time for bologna sandwiches? Love them shits.

That sounds terrible terrible going to jail prison and jail just sounds like oh that's a good question different you said uh when we were driving here that you would rather go to prison for 13 months instead of county jail for six months anywhere but probably the state of florida yeah in in the state of florida i would rather do my time in county because most of the county jails that i've been to in the state of Florida. Yeah. In the state of Florida, I would rather do my time in county because most of the county jails that I've been to in the state of Florida are air conditioned. And it's miserable being locked up in like an aluminum room with no air conditioning. But, you know, most places, county jail is miserable and it's designed to be miserable. Like it's very little access to anywhere.

First off, they're lumping everybody there. So you could be in there in a lot of county jails. You could be in there on like petty theft and you could have like a hardcore dog on one side of you and like a serial killer who wears skin masks on the other side of you. And you're like there for like, yeah, you know, it's like my eighth time getting caught shopping at target. I keep stealing tampons for my girlfriend cause she never goes off her period. Um, and you know, so it, it kind of, it's a sucky place, but because of that and, uh, you never get off your unit. So a lot of the time it's like 23 and one lockdown in a lot of places, which basically just means you're in your cell 23 hours a day and you'll get like an hour access to be able to go out and take a shower, make phone calls, read the newspaper, whatever you do out there, socialize. I didn't like socializing in jail because I didn't like most of the people that I was surrounded with.

Crazy. Yeah. Odd, right? Odd. But I definitely enjoyed taking showers uh that's in fact one of my biggest complaints about prison like osp you only got like two to three showers a week and like i i wouldn't say i'm an exceptionally stinky person but you know i don't like not getting showers because i'm working out every day that's what keeps me focused and makes

me less punchy so that's a good thing to do in jail. Um, I would, and they feed you less food. Once you get to prison, you've already gotten convicted. So like when you're in County jail, they feed you less food because you're more likely to take a plea bargain if you're starving. So they'll, it's a tactic that they use. They give you just the absolute amount that you need to be feeding people for it not to go against like the Geneva Convention codes in there and not a bit more. And they do it fucked up. They'll put giant scoops of butter on your tray. So, yeah, there's a bunch of the calories.

And I don't know about you, but I don't eat giant lumps of butter. Not castigating anyone who does, but. Damn. Yeah, that would. You just. Terrible. I was. Go ahead. Sorry. I can finish my. not not castigating anyone who does but damn yeah that would you just this is terrible i just sounds terrible i was about what go ahead sorry i can finish my you know the majority of prisons and jails are privatized businesses oh yeah oh sorry it's great that's the wild part and you and the amount of money that gets dumped into that system you know i was actually

uh in a county jail right before it went privatized and then went back and spent five months there after it was privatized what was going on when i got back uh they got this director who had been kicked out of the the department of corrections in arizona like for inhumane treatment went to department of corrections in the state of florida and was fired for inhumane treatment went to department of corrections in the state of florida and was fired for inhumane treatment so then this privatized county jail hires him to be the director there and they started having a epidemic because the conditions got so bad that people were just like fuck this i'm i'm checking all the way out right yeah and so what his answer instead of like making things a little better or

getting mental health help was he would take the people who tried to kill themselves and he would four-point restrain them like hands and feet laid out across a cement uh slab where they should have a mattress but he would say the mattress was a uh a security concern and he would lay these people out on these things like restrained down for days at a time and they were supposed to be able to get up every hour to you know circulate blood circulate blood and use restroom but like yeah but but legitimately they were maybe getting it twice a day uh and they would they would defecate on themselves and the reason that i know this is because he started the other thing that he implemented was inmate observation they

called it eye knob where they just force inmates to watch other inmates both in the watch area and in every single unit at night they would have somebody going around with a flashlight that's fire every 15 minutes that's fire yeah that's fire watch in the military yeah so you're just walking around shining a flashlight so dudes are trying to kill themselves because they have bad mental health and we're going to send dudes around to wake them up every 15 minutes with a light in their face because that'll definitely help their mental health out uh it was wild and surprisingly shockingly he got fired from that place for inhumane treatment and might be facing charges so some of those places are so horrifically bad man those privatized prisons are gnarly

but big money yeah absolutely fucking getting their money dude i was uh i was gonna ask you because i did a video on uh that unkillable marine and uh i talked about it briefly in the video but it was a navy punishment exclusively for the brady brick the bread and water had you ever heard of that when you were in i'd never heard of it i yeah yeah bread and water is the thing but the way that you explain it they can they can get out of that by every once in a while giving them right right yeah so like the rule what they changed it in like the 19 1914 or 1918 like early 1900s it used to be just like they'd throw your ass in jail and you'd get two slices of bread and a glass

of water three times a day and that was it and then they changed it to where you could only have that's bread and water that's a punishment while you're in like solitary confinement you get two slices of white bread and water three times a day and that's it and that's like the punishment and then in the early 1900s they changed it so the maximum sentence was uh seven days but then they just kept doing it and the way they got around it was they'd only you you do five days straight and then they let you out in their equivalent of a yard for like four hours and give you one normal meal and then five days back on bread and water and they just keep doing that to you so technically you never did seven days consecutively because you got one full meal and you got to go outside and fucking stretch your

legs dude watching um other countries and how their prison systems work because you have extremely nice ones but also the bad ones though there's one in mexico city where it is four person cell boom boom there's eight to twelve people in four person cell and this is like the bunk beds are almost touching from the wall and they it's like eight to twelve people in that and then they are not allowed to leave the cell when you're in there for your six max six year stint to be there um you have to not you're not allowed to leave the cell when you're in there for your six max six year stint to be there um you have to not you're never allowed to leave the cell they like ever period you're not walking the yard you're never seeing light for that six years you are you are with those individuals but the americans that they fuck up or something happens and they go to that prison

there's like marines in there there's one that was like a veteran or a marine he's like he says i don't know if he was actually mexico it's difficult to say it's like oh you actually committed a crime or you just got right you got screwed in the system to bribe the guy yes so this dude's like i'm looking year two i have four more years and i i don't i this is my life you know who we should get on the podcast what uh they i think he just got home but that guy that went to uh is it marx and kakos that uh caribbean island nation and he had they had banned ammunition and he was like a hunter that went on hunting trips across state lines and he had his he had his luggage and his luggage had like two rounds of 30,

six in the bottom of the bag that stuck in there. Yeah. Just like at the bottom of the bag. And he went there, did his vacation with his wife and kids and they caught him at security going home. And he was arrested on the Island for eight, him and his wife were originally arrested.

They let the wife and kids go and kept him for eight months while he was on i think it was eight months it might be wrong but it was a long ass time while while he was potentially facing 15 years in prison for smuggling ammunition into the country it was like two rounds of ammo or something ridiculous he like just got home but that's crazy and it's not a nice system i guarantee that prison fucking you're gonna put a guy in prison for 15 years over two bullets two significantly smaller bullets in this that he didn't have a way to fire literal accident but then you have the other side of prisons, foreign prisons, where, you know, you've got literal prisons where they like give you like college education and job training. And I just got back from Nashville where I went into a prison and it was sort of based upon that.

It's not as nice, you know, you're still in a dorm full of dudes, but they give you things like job training. You can become an electrician. You can get, you know, construction, like even robotics and engineering. Um, and they, they teach these dudes this stuff. And then towards the end of your sentence, if you're good towards the end of your sentence, they put you in, uh, an actual work release while in prison, where you go out into the community, they help you with job placement. You know, everybody's making 20, 25 bucks an hour. And they charge you if you're, once you're employed, they charge you $3 a day, uh, to, to stay in the program and for your accommodations. Cause the state says, if you're employed outside of the prison, you have to pay something.

And I did an interview with the warden. He's like, this is the absolute lowest. They'll allow me to charge them. I want them to save their money. He's like, this is the absolute lowest they'll allow me to charge them. I want them to save their money. He's like, we have gentlemen who are sending money home to their wives and kids and their parents. He's actually trying to rehabilitate people. Yeah, yeah. Really incredible. And so we were talking about his recidivism rates. And he was like, I asked him about his recidivism rates.

He said, I'd rather talk about my restoration rates. He said, I'd rather not, you know, stigmatize people like by talking about how many people fuck up. Let's talk about the people that succeed. He's like, we have, you know, over, over 70% of our people get out and we never see them again unless it's in our community doing good things. And, you know, there's Tennessee has really high rates of failure. The recidivism rates are high, except this one place that's doing it this way. And so it's like little places like that.

I've also gone into a county jail in Arkansas where they're doing this drug treatment program that's really restorative and helps people. Their recidivism rates are astronomically low. That's like Lone Oak County, Arkansas. Anytime I get the opportunity to go into an institution and speak to people and share a little bit of hope and a little bit about recovery and just let them be seen as human beings and be acknowledged. I always start off my speech with, Hey, thank you for being here. I know that you're incarcerated, but your time is valuable. You are a valuable human being. And I know you probably don't hear that very much being in here, but let me tell you, you are a value and, and what you do and who you are matters. So, you know, I'm not going to waste your time. Let's, let's talk

about the solution here. Um, and I love being able to do that. That's something that, that so strongly set in my heart to be able to reach back to those people. Nobody ever, we didn't, we never had anybody do that for us, but you know who I, I did the majority of my time at Oregon state penitentiary. It's the maximum security place in Oregon. Jelly roll just went in there and played a free show for those dudes and was in

there hugging those dudes and shaking their hands and signing shit for them uh it was really incredible to see that now when you have rehabilitation is a really good point now do you see at most levels it's a fantastic idea so you don't have you're not recommitting the same crimes and you're setting them up for success you're giving tools they can learn they can then manage their emotions way better and then also job opportunities leaving the prison is where would your line be it's like okay you're is it depending on their sentences like murderers you're like hey this person also deserves this same opportunity or how do you feel on that so like look man uh there's there's a lot of factors i'm not a judge but uh you know to me like the majority of the people in there are they're coming home

at some point they're going to be back in your community who do you want living next to you somebody that you fucking tortured and treated inhumanely treated like an animal because of their crime which was probably animalistic. But do you want them to get the help before they come back out or not? And I don't think that offenders should ever get out. I think that unless they're chemically or physically castrated, they should never fucking get out. You know, I don't think that should be an optional thing. If you, if you're convicted of a heinous crime, you know, either, you know, give them the pill or give them the snip, chemically castrate them if they reoffend, because a lot of the times these people are

sick in the head. And even if it's not about sexual gratification, it's about conquest. It's about power. If they reoffend it's instant death penalty, you know, give them, give them one appeal. We don't need all of these crazy fucking appeals and death penalty somebody is given the death penalty that's an extreme crime give them one appeal and and let's express lane this so that we're not having people on death row for 40 fucking why are we paying all of that and then executing them that's why it's more money to do death row costs more than life in prison yeah and they're talking about like crazy they're talking about like oh we have to get these humane meds and people you know there's a waiting

list to get these meds bitch how much fentanyl do you see i don't know when was every month just put them down dog put them down fix the problem there's not enough oxygen for people that like this wade wilson dude bro like he brutally murdered two women and the jurors decided he should be put to death he should get one appeal and if that appeal doesn't you know go his way and if he gets anything but the death penalty you know like give him the death penalty just get it handled it sucks second video on that it was the uh because then he or his appeal was based off of if he had tbi or not correct yeah and that i didn't look more into that i know i was just watching yours doing yeah so they found nothing significantly wrong with him crazy no tbi he

didn't have like severe brain damage or anything like that. Um, and you know, here's the thing is that case is interesting because there is a high chance that he might get life without in, in appeals because they made that law allowing. So the way that it works in Florida now is you need a eight out of 12 majority for them to be able to give somebody the death penalty. Before that it had to be unanimous Florida, the same law that they used uh that if you uh child under the age of 13 you are eligible for the death penalty they also that's when they made it so you only need eight out of 12 you don't need it unanimous because a lot of people don't want to vote democracy they don't want to they don't want to be like man you know this dude

but killing people is wrong they want to be able to so previously it literally could have been like one crazy person that was just like i don't agree with the death penalty i don't care i don't care what they did i'll never agree to do it yeah one crunchy granola uh juror can can mess it all up and then you know. I don't believe in that. Well, the other 10 of us do. So we don't give a fuck. But they changed that law while he was in county.

He's been in county since like 2019. So trying to grandfather him into less strict rules. Yeah. So part of his appeal is based upon that. like if he gets the death penalty again dude why are we paying for him why oh yeah there's let's fix it fix it jesus i want to know if you um did that answer your question what was your question on that or your his name was wade wilson wade wilson yeah isn't that dead yeah not not deadpool i know it's not dead sorry that was my only question no's why you see it

and that's what I caught I was like what the fuck why is Deadpool he looks like quite the character though he didn't have all those swastika face tattoos and everything before he went in either he went and did that to himself

and women still he has a horde of women fans and they have donated ninety thousand dollars to his getting an appeal attorney and his the fuck wrong with you know nine millimeter round like nine cents or yeah one of his not seven fiancés is in charge of that money it's it's fundly uh and and she's got that money and she's just been spending all this money and uh she's probably facing charges this story just never ends it keeps giving us golden nuggets what was it sorry go ahead it was um one story i don't know have you watched the meninde monsters or is it monsters have you watched the menindez brothers i haven't

had a chance yet. That is one. I would love to hear your take on. Cause like psychologically it is extremely interesting case because you have these dudes killed their parents. Spoiler alert. It's a crime. You can read about it.

They like murdered their parents. And then they went on a spending spree. They, they made it look like a mafia murder did it, and they blew a lot of money. It's like, oh, see, you're good. We didn't do anything. But they got arrested.

They tried all that shit, and they're like narcissistic, all this behavior. Then, and they hid what was happening to them. They wouldn't talk about it until finally it came out. It's like, oh, yeah, our dad used to fuck us ever since we were five years old and on. And then one brother said stop. And then it just went to the little brother.

So they were just screwed, like mentally, psychologically. They're screwed. But they're still in jail. And this happened in the 90s. And that's where it's like, what do you do on that situation on both sides of it? Because they killed it, but they're not even trying to rehabilitate them and at that age are they able to be rehabilitated like from your perspective on this stuff look man i have uh because you have trauma of your own that's yeah yeah no i'm like i

was when i was six years old um and it definitely manifest you know not being able to process that trauma in an appropriate way manifest itself in a lot of bad behaviors and a lot of it was based around me numbing out and self-medicating and i did a lot of crimes but i take accountability for all those crimes bro i i did those and if you're out doing crimes you know people say it on my videos like they're winning the game or something but they say do the crime do the time. Bitch. I did. I I'm still, I'm still property of the state of Florida. I'm on probation. I'm still doing my time. Like I'm with that. Like 100%. I knew when I was going in these dudes, are these dudes trying to get out now? Are they trying to glean sympathy because they got like, you're still responsible for your actions so they one was

just turned 18 one was 20 when this happened so they killed their parents yeah this is 89 or 91 this is from five years old tell like five months before the murder five months before their father would

their entire lives and they would do force objects into them like and they were the brothers and so the mother then the mom knew which was there was no way not to know like it goes into graphic detail that i can't share no but that's why it's that weird they would do things to try and lessen the burden of being by their father continually yeah i don't know, man. The way they handled it was execution style, like shooting them as they were running.

Yeah, because they came up with it. It's like, oh, we're going to do this. Let's do this. But it's that hard part because they're in jail. They're in prison prison. But then it's that flip side. It's like, fuck, okay. It's expected for what they went through they executed their abuser yeah oh yeah yeah both of them and that's but then afterwards they're like well what do we do oh oh yeah so i

mean it's just it's it's a little bit crazy that they went on uh like a you know they were rich so they and that shopping spree they were rich, like their dad gave him like $20 million. Like they lived. And again, that was an extravagant lifestyle because what the dad was doing, he would be like, look, Oh, look, look what I'm doing for you though. Money, money, money, money. So it was this weird thing. But now you have these kids that are like, I don't know what the fuck to do. They were highly groomed into accepting that type of behavior and everything. Yeah. That's that's i mean that is a complicated situation and i'm never ever sorry or sad when somebody's abuser uh gets executed you know when somebody's abusing kids and they get mr taking out yeah mr chippy yeah um but i just you know i know

that there's better ways to handle that than what they did but also how old were they when they did it eight one just turned 18. That brother was 20. So that's what's crazy. One of the first people that I got sold up with when I went to prison was, I believe, 17 years old when he had found some pictures on his uncle's phone of stuff that was inappropriately happening to his sister. He went to the police. He tried to get help.

Nobody would help him. He went to his dad. He tried to get help. Nobody would help him. He went to his dad. Like nobody was stopping what was going on. So he took it upon himself and he buried him in multiple locations. It's been a while since I read his paperwork. I don't want to get his story wrong, but he was doing that to defend his little sister. And you know, there's really something to be said for the progress that he's made like his brain wasn't fully formed at that time you know he was he was 17 years old you're not fully developed um and you know he was doing things to defend himself i don't the menendez brothers it it seems like they were full-grown adults and this was just a revenge thing and there was probably a better way to handle it but also you have to understand that trauma does fucked up things

to people um so you know i don't know that i would that's not weird that's not just it's just complex it's super complex and it's it's that one of those few times you're like ah well what there is no win in this situation they got screwed no matter how you look at it yeah for sure so are they they're doing life i think yeah they're doing life they had reason to believe their parents were trying to execute them as well which is why they had the plan to kill their parents and that's what kind of set everything into motion and they also had evidence that the dad was still youngest at the age of 18 on a private plane on the way to like business stuff. It's crazy.

Why are they locked up? Dude, that's the crazy. Yeah. The 90s and they made it look like crazy privileged kids. Yeah. It's crazy story to read. And they're still in. Yeah.

Their whole case is just like the abuse is kind of like secondary. They're in California. Yes. Yeah. Cause I'm, I'm doing an interview with a dude here very soon who was locked up with them. And he wants to talk to me about some of the,

you know, what, what their daily life is like. He was actually a dude that was a shot caller for the GBG. Do you know what the GBG is? It's the gay boy gangsters. It's a gay boy gangsters. It's a California prison gang. Uh, it's a gang of gay dudes that got tired of getting picked on and shit like that.

A lot of, a lot of them are dropouts from gangs like the NLR, the Nazi low riders or the, uh, you know, the Aryan brotherhood that got caught doing stuff with other dudes while they were locked up. And so, you know, they got kicked out of that gang and they ended up joining, you know, forming this other gang, the Gay Boy Gangsters. And they are on yards that like, aren't active yards, but they're still gang members. And this dude was actually on an MSNBC show about like MSNBC lockup. And I'm going to be interviewing this dude about what the Menendez brothers' life is like on the inside. So that'll be really interesting for me to hear.

Yeah, read their story. Watch the series, too, so you get both sides of it. Hi, Mr. Rich. The other police officer has shown up. Did you just reach for a gun? It wasn't a gun. I didn't go. It's weird.

It's weird where, like, the professionalism of, like, my job gets not brought up, but, like, when you guys are talking about the Menendez brothers and, like, you know,

assaults to children and stuff like that, which I'm involved in investigations now. And, like, Cody's like, you want to switch with me and say some stuff? And I'm like, ah, shit.

I mean, all of it's kind of downer stuff. Like, you want to switch with me and say some stuff? And I'm like, ah, shit. I mean, all of it's kind of downer stuff. You saying that you were assaulted when you were a kid, the odds of you, not you, I'm sorry, that would seem, I don't want to be rude. The odds of somebody that's being assaulted, assaulting somebody else is like 25 or like 30%. And so the people that I deal with that are adults that are assaulting other people, whether it be another adult or a juvenile or a child, is almost guaranteed that that had happened to them when they were younger or at some point in their life.

Mark Alynasunga Cyclic behavior. Mark Alynasunga Yeah. It's extremely, basically, it's one of those moments in your life where it poisons you and a lot of people for the rest of their life and can result in uh like that repetitive behavior of somebody then assaulting somebody else not saying that that's an excuse to do it because once you become like 23 years old even though you had a traumatic experience doesn't give you the right to start doing that to somebody else that's just as innocent as you were when that happened this is i mean you're started now for if you didn't know rich did you

go into what you do now for police work no we just we talked on the car a little bit uh when we were bullshitting about you being on parole because i was like oh sweet i didn't say did you make him right in the back yeah yeah he cuffed me and he gave me he didn't give me a cavity search but he gave me a good pat down like dude one of the hardiest pat downs i've ever had so it was nice i'm still moist jd i like just in the short time that i've known you just like us both right you take jokes really well yeah and i say really offensive things because he means because he means it i was biting my tongue so bad while you were sitting in the back and we were bullshitting

because I was like, I don't think he knows me that well and I don't want to be a jerk, but I straight up want to be like yo man, you want papers? I have my travel pass with me, dog. My PO signed off on it. Rich, you were sweating and you were like, I want to tell this joke. No, it's not.

It says not easily offended right here. It says Irish, but it's the same. When my woman was in the front, I really, and you were like, you know, coming up to the car and you're like, Hey, what's up? I was like, Hey, get in the back. Crim. I wanted to stop. I was like, no, I got to ease into this.

I don't want to be like that guy where, you know, all of a sudden he's like the cops are all the same which is shit i loved that bro i loved that you were talking earlier about being good at hide and seek um which i love as when i was on patrol was you know playing hide and seek and i do it now as a detective and it's different but when you're like yeah i hid under uh like this massive pile of clothes and i used to see piles of clothes everywhere right so i always jump on piles of clothes so when you said that when you said that he was like yeah i hit under a pile of clothes and so i didn't find me i was like that's why i jump on piles of claws so here's the thing i didn't say about that around there's a dude there here's the thing i didn't say about that. When she leaps around, there's a dude there. Here's the thing I didn't say about that is there was two rooms and one of them was our guest room that was for my roommate's dad.

So it was a very masculine room and it looked like it would have been my room. And I lived in this like Barbie pink room that she had had as her second closet. So it was super Barbie pink, which like I'm cool. I'm a modern man. I can fuck with pink. My favorite things are pink you know vagina yeah yeah it took you a second and i'm proud of you you got there i've just discovered myself but oh never mind vagina so um yeah so like i was in that room and i think

that they kind of like automatically didn't look at that room the same so it might have thrown them off in their defense uh i don't i'm not saying they were bad at their job but i am better dude i i tell you what dude i go into the non-obvious rooms all the time because i do i look for the stuff so i mean when i would search a a house for a guy my um i would start in the basement and then we would work our way up secrets don't make friends you want to you guys want to do this later? The gang plays hide and seek with JD DeLay. We can't get angry. We can't play hide and seek with JD DeLay.

You have an hour to hide, bro. Shit. Why is there a pile of clothes on the unsub table? Why did you give him a kiss of fingers? I don't want to get caught. I would search basements first. I learned it from an old head. I would search basements first because once you search the basement and go to the first floor, there's nowhere for a guy to run because they can only hide up.

And then you're either jumping out of a second or third attic window, we've had happen before oh yeah but you get him get him with it get him with a broken ankle down there those videos have been jumping out like a three-story like don't get up and run you're like okay I'm gonna steal your thunder you're that video that I that I did where the guy jumped off the fucking fifth story? Dude, did... Did I beforehand cough Sith? Yeah, dude. Sorry, I'm going to take my shoes off. No, he bounced.

He bounced. Oh, no, that's not the one that ran. He just bounced. Yeah, dude. There was one that like hit and gets up and runs and you're like, how the fuck? That one just bounced. Yeah, he just fucking we owned we had a bouncer one time and it was similar we went into the projects because a guy came out with like a samurai sword or a machete and like cut his neighbor in the projects and so he runs up to like the third and a half floor because the first floor

was like five feet above the ground and then he was in the third floor and they're like hey man uh the po's that got there first because at the time i was a housing cop and the po's that got there first were like hey we stood in front of his door at the apartment and like he's on the third floor so he's not jumping out that window so he's definitely in there hiding so we're like oh okay cool Let's just put somebody back there just in case. And I go back there and I look up and I see his windows open and there's like a string hanging from it, like shoelaces, like a shoelace string. And I'm like, huh, that's weird. And I'm shining my light in it. And I'm like, I'm kind of talking shit.

I'm like, dude, just get out of your apartment and answer the door. But we get a warrant. We get the keys to the projects. We go in it. He's not there. And I'm looking out the window and I can see that he tied like two shoestrings together.

Little knots to put his feet. Dude. And they're hanging out the window. Shoestrings? Is this a tiny little man? You don't like to say that in 2024? And I look down and it was nighttime at this, it was very dark

but the street lamps are shining on towards the projects and I look into the grass and there's a PO just kind of like standing there looking around with you know his flashlight and I go, dude move up like 10 feet. He's like what? I go shine your light right there and then shine it away. Just go like this. There is

a man-sized dent in the dirt from where he went and just stuck and then got up like and then ran off we got like the next day he was he turned himself in but homie jumped off and let let a crater a crim crater in the middle of the freaking yard. A crim crater. I just like, hold on. Like, yeah. It's like a Looney Tunes. It was literally the side of a human body with like the arm deeper in and the shoulder. And you're like, that looks like a human dent. A human dent in the ground from above this window where two Nike shoelaces are tied.

I was just like, he tried shoelaces like the thought process is this is gonna hold my body weight plus i'll have the the strength some there are some criminals out there that are intelligent people they just got caught up in the wrong thing and everything oh yeah like i've noticed that a lot of people who are out there actively breaking the law are not the most intelligent people on the planet i tell everybody right we only catch the dumb ones like that's it like the smart ones have like a method and they know what to do and then we always have odds on our sides too because when you were saying you can't outrun the radio like that's an old cop trope and the other one is like you got to get

lucky every day all i have to do is get lucky once yeah dude like over over the course of 20 years people are like oh you were bad at crime well you, over the course of 20 years, people are like, Oh, you were bad at crime. Well, you know, over the course of 20 years, I had, you know, the time that I was incarcerated and like maybe a couple of years where I was actually doing good. Other than that, I was doing crimes all day, every day. That's my hyper fixation on meth is like, I've got to stay making money and I'm doing horrible things that victimize my community to do it. There's definitely rules that help you from getting caught you know that like it can be passed down and everything but like the odds are just against you eventually it's not an if you're going to get caught it's a when you're going to get

caught and how you're going to ride it out when you get caught you knew what you were doing at the time unless you're a complete and total mongoloid moron you know what you're doing you know that it's against the law and you know that you're probably going to go to prison just stand up take your fucking lumps man you know what i'm saying stand up just say lawyer you know what i'm saying and then it's you know you've already lost your portion of the game and then let the lawyers deal with it don't fight the cops when they're trying to arrest you i've never had any like never had a resisting arrest if you got me you got me i might run before you catch up to me but i'm not gonna fight a fucking cop bro it's somebody doing his job man i'm a scumbag out

doing dumb shit we had a dude that would run from us all the time and uh but like the second that you and until you got handcuffs on him it was him trying to just like claw for freedom but the second you got handcuffs on him he would turn into a gentleman and be like ah man the cuffs are on all right you got me you got me i wait till they pull the guns i would pull the guns and when i would hear them you know when when they would the guns would come out i that's when i throw my hands in the air i go i was just playing let's go to jail let's go to jail because you know one thing about west coast cops is uh you know they won't do the type of shit that florida cops will do that florida cops will do where florida cops will just they'll pull you over and they'll just straight from the gate start

violating your constitutional rights but if you give them a reason west coast cops will absolutely shoot you they'll absolutely fucking shoot you so i have a i have a question yeah oh this is stuck i can't move it i can't lean back okay so um there was a a social media post and i and i made a comment on it and everybody commented on my comment and said tell me you're an east coast cop without telling me you're an east coast cop which i am and it was and tell me if you've noticed this as well west coast they do the felony car stops the you know lights get out the door weapons drawn sir driver get your toss of keys out of the car open up the door from the outside put your hands up back up east coast it's a bum rush the second that that car stops especially if it's a car chase we're sprinting

after you because it's we never have time for a felony stop because the dude's always bailing and bolting. Have you noticed it as a West Coast, East Coast kind of thing? So I haven't ever really done a lot of crimes in New York. The only East Coast place I've been is... You don't want to know why. Because of that. Richard.

I was afraid of this. Oh, Richard, hi. Because Cody's over there in the Lower East Coast. Richard. Super copy. i feel like the state of florida isn't comparable to anywhere else on the planet except maybe australia like yeah florida is like baby australia um but it's so wild out there man um you know like they the cops out there in florida they'll they're aggressive and everything they're 100 aggressive they do not care about your constitutional fucking rights uh they'll figure it out in court later and they'll lie like they'll 100 lie locals or statees are all of them um because like there's always a difference between city cops county and then

you know the depths and then uh statees yeah so i mean i think it just depends you know county to county and local to local you know from my experience in volusia county uh they'll lie on you they'll they'll break your constitutional rights they'll do all that shit the sheriff's department like chitwood is in charge of the sheriff's department out there and chitwood make sure that his people are super trained um you know they're they've given de-escalation they're giving mental health training they're given narcan training so um and and he holds them to a higher level of accountability i don't know if you guys saw recently but he had a dude that was on one of his deputies that was out using his car in his uniform to to women uh and he like went after the dude full tilt. Uh, he wants him prosecuted

to the full extent of the law. And then he went and had the dude's badge melted down. He's like, this badge is tarnished. It'll never be used ever again. This man is a disgrace. His family's a disgrace, like went hard on him on the news. And they had the badge melted down in front of all of their new recruits that were coming up. Uh, he uh he made them all watch and he said do you have any questions now and they're like no sir like so it just it does depend uh place to place but it just seems like florida is a climate of like real wild west like you know that they're coming for you it's the wild west lawmen down there like sheriff gr Grady Judd and all of that. Tell me the positives and the negatives of the Wild West.

Because I'm not trying to – I love playing devil's advocate because I like to see where people's brains are. And I like to kind of just see it from both sides. So, I mean, there's got to be, from a law enforcement side, a reason why the Wild Wild West is happening. So I i'm gonna get called a snitch and a boot licker and shit like this but like now that i'm a law-abiding citizen yeah yeah shut up boot licker boots so uh since i'm a law-abiding citizen these days and since like these younger criminals that are that are out there honestly bro they're just mentally deficient and they have no code and we call them retarded yeah yeah yeah no that's that's that's accurate yeah um you know they'll involve we call them retarded

these dudes are out there just committing crimes against like whoever they can victimize that's vulnerable you know they'll go after the elderly they'll go after women they'll go after just whatever the fuck and it's not like how i was brought up with with the convict mentality in the street code that we had um you know i'm i'm leaning more and more towards the side of law enforcement man i don't want to see people victimizing their communities i don't want to see people continuing these generational curses of passing down the lifestyle to kids i don't want to see kids getting victimized anymore and the wild west shit is good like i want citizens in this country to be

able to defend themselves by whatever means necessary but like can you give me you don't have to give me an example but like if you can that'd be great of like the positive and the negative the positive the positive of those wild west sheriffs out there is that they'll they'll 100 let and congratulate you on shooting someone for breaking into your home whereas in oregon like you if you shoot somebody for breaking into your home you better have shot them in the chest and not the back otherwise you're going to get charges you better like i recommend to anybody who uh has to shoot someone in defense of their home and their family in in the state of Oregon or California defecate.

Shit your pants. So when you go into court, you could be like, your honor, I was scared so bad. I pissed my pants and just bullets started flying because I knew he was going to kill me. Real quick. Is there a duty to retreat in Oregon? There's one in New York. It says like stand your ground castle doctrine

i believe you have a duty to retreat uh if you can retreat uh i think that you have to do that um i think if you're like pinned in your own house there there are there are there's a certain extent to which you can defend yourself with lethal force but i think you have to exhaust every other option like they want you to like run out your back door if someone's breaking in your front door fuck that like you value you value somebody else's you value your possessions over somebody else's life no first off they valued my possessions more than they valued their own life when they came in their house where i keep my wife and my kids and uh i'm gonna fix it so that they don't make that mistake with somebody else who isn't armed you know what i'm saying that's

the attitude that i like about florida the the sheriffs come out and congratulate you like chitwood came out and congratulated that dude who came home and the neighbor was his child uh and he beat him into a almost a coma the dude was unrecognizable his face he looked like that yeah he looks like that alien dude off of uh american dad um you know he looks like and by the time the dude was done with him and he was gonna kill him and the kid said dad please don't you know the dude was an ex-con he'd already been to prison and he called and he said hey you guys better get an ambulance over here this dude's gonna fucking die uh and sheriff chitwood went in and investigated it and said yeah that dude's facing no charges i he made a public press

statement saying uh fathers have the right to protect their kids by whatever means they think is necessary in a situation like this if you find somebody your kid handle business call us we'll come clean it up and that's how i think policing is done right um you know just from my opinion like as a father are you a father not yet no not yet okay that's going to be an epic journey for you um as a father like your your ultimate duty your sacred duty is to protect your kid yeah you know that's the number one lowest fucking set bar in fatherhood like which is one of the most you know primordial things a dude can do we we've got a few primordial urges where we we have to survive we have to eat and we have to procreate you know that's eat sleep survive that's it right so but once you procreate your job is to at bare minimum

take care of that child so if somebody is harming your children there should be an instinct that kicks in where you do whatever it takes and we should support that if somebody if i walk into a room and somebody's hurting my kid i should be able to take that motherfucker off the planet and they support that out there in florida um you know in the state of oregon you're gonna do time i met it i met a dad who was in prison when i was in prison for i think they gave him like involuntary manslaughter so he only got like seven years or whatever but like he he his nephew was watching his son he came home and his nephew was his son and he grabbed the nephew and started beating on the nephew the nephew pulled the knife and ended up the knife ended up going into the nephew and the nephew died and they gave him they still gave him like seven years he was protecting his son in his son's bedroom dog that

dude should have been given a medal and uh you know they the state should have paid for some counseling for his kid you know some some trauma counseling for his kid not taking his dad away and putting him in fucking prison for that so i think there's there's definite pluses and minuses of that wild west type of outlook you know the is that richard were you talking about like how police officers handle crime for a wild west approach yeah like is that what you're saying like hey the police officers responding to something like responding to crime yeah yeah so i mean the other the other side of it is that you know sometimes like me let me give you a

hypothetical right okay hypothetically let's say that a wild west thing would you consider this a wild west thing if you ran from the police that you didn't you went downtown without any shoes like your shoes just ended up being missing like hey you ran from me i get you you had some nikes on you get in the back of the car shoes are gone so you got to go downtown without your shoes i mean who really cares it's some shoes so you know what i'm saying so then what would be a wild west thing that like somebody made me run bro if some if i was a cop and somebody made me run yeah you're barefoot you don't you don't feed the fuck bro don't make me run yeah you know what i'm saying like Like, don't make me do extra paperwork.

I never did that. I never did that. I was like, Rich, right? I'm going to give you a hypothetical. Listen. I feel like you're... Rich is over here taking fucking Nike Airs and exploring into the storm drains. Bro, just saying.

I never made you run, Rich. I never made you run. Is this why all the power lines have shoes on? It was an old East Coast thing to do. And I heard it from guys in Baltimore. And they were like, you want feet, man? Or, hey, you ran. I guess these J's just aren't good enough for you today.

That's a highly specific thing. That's kind of some convict shit to do because like, you know, in, in prison, if there's somebody who's down on a sex offense and they have any shoes that aren't those state issue Bobos, that's the first thing that comes off them.

We make them walk back onto their unit off the yard in socks and it's the walk of shame. You know, you're never going to be able to own any shoes that aren't bobos and those things are hell on your they're they're bad on your feet they're bad on your back they suck they look like no idea what bobos they look like chuck taylors but they're even flatter and and worse put together um the state is issuing prison shoes but you can buy shoes off canteen if you if your family puts money on your books or you've got a hustle but a sex offender is never going to be in anything like we'll never ever let it happen

and it doesn't they could be the gnarliest like somebody could give them a hand-me-down pair of shoes that have holes all in them you know you're just not wearing them because fuck you that's why i got another question for you let's run run it. So I love, like I said, I love adult hide and seek. Mm-hmm. If you're comfortable. Tag, you're it. Yeah, right. If you're comfortable, what was a great hiding spot or hiding spot story?

You don't have to tell us what was in it that you were able to stow that the boys didn't find. I mean, I got two ounces of rolling tobacco and two cans of chew into prison in my two cans but that's like damn wait say that again go say that at the beginning yeah so you take it out of the can and you okay okay but wow you know it's sorry i was like two cans i'm like i thought he was gonna say like oh i like impala's have like this little knob you can pull out and I put two ounces of crack in there and then I covered it up. You're like, I put two things in my poop chute. I wanted that to be your superpower, by the way.

Yes. You had an unlimited prison permit. It's like Mary Poppins' bag. Whatever you need, he puts it out. JD, give me the gun. He just bends over. He's our utility belt.

He's got an AT4 in there. But the offset would have been you feel everything come out. Richard drives his car out of his ass. I damaged my prison pocket in medicinal ways. Here's the thing. I only put stuff in my ass one time

to bring it back in it was right before we were going on christmas break i knew i had somebody who was doing drops in the parks and i was on the parks crew and i knew that i wasn't going to get through the holiday break unless i stuffed my own because i i was giving everybody else packages and they were giving me half of what they brought back in and i was doing the math and and I'm like, fuck this. I need to get as much in as I possibly can, or I'm going to run out of cigarettes and chew. And you literally got as much in. Oh yeah. Yeah. No, I made myself a monster and I'm looking at it. I was like, you know, I could do this. And then I'm looking at it and I'm like thinking, I think this is bigger than any turd that I've ever made. This is going to suck. And it did. But I went out, I went to the guys that I'm like,

so where's the vaseline because we had some vaseline to lube up packages before they went in our you know what i'm saying and they're like the vaseline's gone man and i'm like well what do i do just spit on this yeah that's probably not gonna work so they're like one dude was like hey i think there's an old packet of mayonnaise that was open on the back of the truck and i'm looking at it and it's got a green tint right but i'm thinking in my head i'm doing truck and i'm looking at it and it's got a green tint right but i'm thinking in my head i'm doing my because i'm not super good at biology i'm like it's not going in my mouth it's going in my and poo comes out of there so it's not gonna make me sick it's not

gonna make me sick if i put spoiled mayonnaise jd did you put a dip can in your soul well not not the whole can but there was definitely about know, four ounces of tobacco in my ass. Show that can. Go hang up sideways. So I lube it up with the green tinted mayonnaise, which was a mistake. And I'll admit that. How does it stay together? Put it in a bag.

Oh, so you put it in bags. The chew has to be in a separate bag than the rolling tobacco. It looks like a and then you sleep well you you take the bags and you sort of form them into a shape that's you know kind of turd like and then you you take a uh a latex glove and you cut the fingers off and you wrap one and tie it at the end and then the other way you wrap it and tie it at the end that's how you make a prison pocket package when you're on a work crew and then you know you have to lube it and you wrap it and tie it at the end. That's how you make a prison pocket package when you're on a work crew. And then, you know, you have to lube it and you push it as far inside

yourself as you can. Cause there's a huge chance that when you go back in, they pull over like 60, 50, 60% of the people. Every time you go back in for, uh, you know, the bend over squat and cough. And this is the first time I've ever done this. I'm like, I, is this going to fly out of me? I don't know. We're going to try and see. So, you know, I'm like, I lube it with this green mayonnaise and I take it all the way. Like it's I'm bobbing that thing up there as high as I can. And, uh, I'm like, Holy fuck, this genuinely hurts. This is genuinely uncomfortable. And, uh, I have to wait like 40 minutes for the crew boss to be ready to leave and then it's like a 35 40 minute ride back to the prison and he i felt like he hit every speed bump

uh this thing's up inside of me so he hits the speed i'm like doing lamaze breathing like you know what i'm saying like just trying to breathe this thing out when we get to the prison and of course he's's like, delay. He's breathing right now. Yeah, yeah. Zach right now is uncomfortable. Zach's like, I just look over, Zach stares. He's breathing heavy.

My DNA was green either. I have so many questions. I think oxygen exposure, I think it was spoiled. Yeah, it didn't get better. No, no, definitely. It's not one of those things that ages like wine or cheese cheese yeah no it's milk and dairy in the sun yeah yeah so that gets important later uh so like we we go to the line and he's like delays search time so i have to get booty ass right i have to bend over i have to spread them i have to cough and i make it through and i'm like i go

directly to the toilet and i'm like right everything comes through and i'm like i go directly to the toilet and i'm like right everything comes out and i'm like i just got away with the crime of the century i got this in and i'm super stoked until like about six hours later like my inner soul is hurting all the way up i feel it all the way up my lower spine right like all the way it's like i feel it from like my my my geish hurts my spine hurts like i'm like oh fuck something really bad is happening geish you know you know like your prostate you know what i'm saying yeah the old taint yeah i feel my taint and i'm not i've never heard the geish i had never felt my prostate before it was never something that had felt uncomfortable or, you know, all of a sudden I know exactly where my prostate is, brother.

It's not a good thing. So I put in a triage kite to go to medical. And the next day they call me down and I go down there and it's this giant Indian doctor, not Native American, but Indian doctor who is going to be important here in just a minute, had huge corn dogs for fingers. So everybody in prison seems to have massive fingers. This dude had massive, massive fingers. You're hired. Sir, what are your credentials? Well, I'm not a doctor, but i was the glove model for hamburger

helper you have the job my inner hole is fucked up and he's like what did you smuggle into the prison and you're like nothing he's like are you letting dudes ball you out i'm like no and he's like, what did you smuggle into the prison? And I'm like, nothing. He's like, are you letting dudes ball you out? I'm like, no. And he's like, all right, well, I got to get in there and see what's going on. I'm like, I just have an infection. Can you just give me some antibiotics? He's like, no, I need to finger it out.

And so he actually said, yeah, yeah. He tells me to, he tells me to drop trowel and grab the counter. And I'm like, at this point, I'm like in so much pain, I'm not going not gonna argue with him but i'm pissed off that he's gonna go on my soul so i do it defiantly i like drop my pants in defiance and grab the counter angrily and then i look back and he's looping up two fingers on a gloved hand brother he's doing this and i'm like swooping he's he's putting swooping scoop dripping ky on this shit and i'm like got two fingers and he goes don't worry i'm a medical professional and i'm like, doc, two fingers. And he goes, don't worry. I'm a medical professional.

And I'm like, you're a medical professional with corn dogs for fingers. What does that even mean? And he goes, take a deep breath and just boom. And I gave him attitude. I almost came out of my skin, bro.

And he goes, does this, yes, that hurts. And then he drags his giant knuckles. Does this hurt? Yes. And then he drags his kn knuckles. Does this hurt? Yes. And then he drags his knuckles again.

It all hurts. Get out of me, right? So he's like, yeah. I've heard that before. Yeah. He's like, it seems like you have a swollen prostate. It's probably from an infection. We're going to give you some antibiotics. I'm like, oh, the shit I asked for.

I wish I knew that earlier. Gutted me like a Thanksgiving turkey. Thanks, friend. Totally his fault. Not yours yours for putting mayonnaise inside yourself yeah let's blame the doctor what an asshole were you lactose intolerant before this incident or after yes i was lactose intolerant so look look here's the thing this this will make sense why i'm angry at this dude a little later in the story okay because i go back to my unit i'm taking this shit uh the antibiotics help after about four days i'm literally laid on my bunk just shivering like

my inner soul hurts and so after about a week he calls i'm better i'm fine i'm out there we're on winter break uh from work crews. I'm working out every day. I get a call back down to medical and I'm like, absolutely. No, no, not doing it. Right. Go down there. And he's like, Hey, so I need to do a checkup.

I'm like, I feel so much better, doc. Thank you. Appreciate you. And he's like, no, I need to do a checkup. And I'm like, dude, I'm not letting you back inside me. And he goes, well, look, either, either you participate in this or I'm going to have to write you up and you're going to go to the hole. And I'm like, so either you're going to my hole or I'm going to the hole. And he's like, yeah, that's basically your options. And if I go to the hole, that means

I'm going back to OSP. And I kind of like defiantly dropped my pants again without being told this time. I'm like, like come on let's do this and grabbed it i look back he's only lubing up one finger and i'm like how come now that i'm not in pain it's one finger but when i was dying it was two he goes because i like you you're a funny guy and uh yeah yeah that's why i say dr corndog was an asshole. So I just want to say one thing, JD. When I asked you that, like, what's, you know, the best place to hide stuff in a funny story. You didn't mean like that. I meant, like, did you have an Arizona iced tea can that was a fake safety method?

Not like, how much tobacco did you shove up your ass one day and then get sepsis because of it? I was like, 20 minutes later later there's a spot in like a chevy malibu which you can pop out and you were like there's a spot in your ass that you can fill up and i was like okay that's cool so i'm sure that you've seen the the fake decks uh the fake car audio decks oh yeah that are hiding spots that have a little safe in them uh yeah so those are always cool um i like this after oh you meant that yeah it's like a radio i have a hidden story for you after this gliders big gliders um yeah i had a heroin and big gliders all the time yeah you get bindles of heroin and i mean you can't really do that much with them but my number one go-to was always magnet boxes

i don't know if you've encountered magnet boxes it It's like the high to key ones, but they can be bigger. Yeah. They're bigger. They're big enough to hold like a scale and drugs and baggies. And you know, that way it's up underneath the car. Um, and you can, you have a much better argument at being able to say, well, it's not yours. That's constructive possession. I'm not the one who put that there unless they fingerprint it and get your fingerprints on it. You've got a pretty good chance at being able to build an argument a good attorney would yeah um so those were always my favorite but i had a couple different times where they they would fall off the bottom of the car if you hit like a bump or something and like i've run over all my own dope before and i've run out in the middle of the street and like fuck yeah my dope what the are you okay sir don't worry about it

just kind of trying to refuge a little bit of the two ounces off the pavement you know what i'm saying the only reason why i know about the lighter one is one day we were searching to do that we they would always sell on this one corner and we we got them we saw him do a hand-to-hand and we jumped out on him we're like that's our pc we saw you do a hand-to-hand and we jumped out on him. We're like, that's our PC. We saw you do a hand-to-hand deal. You're saying hand-to-hand just does something to me. Finger-to-butt. We saw him do a finger-to-butt deal directly from the hole. And we jumped out on him and we're searching him.

And he's got a lighter. And I would always flick the lighters to see if they worked or not. I don't know why. It's just a thing I would do. Like, ooh, lighter. Like a little tism? Yeah. So I had a little tism where I'd flick the lighter.

I was like, flick, flick. This doesn't work. It's bullshit. Boom. And then I was like, why are there heroin packets all over the room? Wait, yours is an accidental discovery? And I was like,

you son of a bitch. Shut the lighters. How many lighters does he have on? And he had three or four lighters and one of them was real and the other couple ones had heroin in them. And I was like,

doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo like that guy was calling what's your funny story when i was in medic school we were i was the i think i was the first class when the medic uh army 68 whiskey program was switching from open bays to dormitories where it was two guys to a room. So they were brand new buildings. So like they were super strict about everything. We weren't allowed to have anything other than water. You couldn't have a Gatorade. You couldn't have food. You can have shit in your room and they'd come to through and they do like inspections every once in a while.

And I was a complete shit bag. I went to sit call once the entire time I was in the army and I went in and told them that i was a vegetarian and that i felt weak and that i needed proteins i got a profile to have protein powder in my dorm and i made a deal with my buddy next door that i'd work out with every day after uh we got let go or whatever his name was his last name was coffee i don't remember i think it was brandon coffee anyways coffee like to drink our deal was uh i'll supply the protein you supply the pre-workout don't care how you do it figure it out i've got the protein you get a you're not getting a profile for pre-workout fuck you figure it out so he went and he got the c4

brand at the time but they were like the stick pre-workouts and he was hiding in his room i don't know how and uh somebody recovered some nine millimeter rounds so they they tore every dorm apart i mean we're talking taking the felt off the bottom of the lamp undoing the fucking outlet covers everywhere this is ait this is ait okay and coffee had showed me where he was hiding coffee had went and spent like an entire paycheck on under armor socks the expensive ones he had a his closet or his dresser drawer you pulled it open it was the entire dresser drawer was socks ranger rolled into a baseball, three deep, hundreds of socks. And that's where he would take one stick of pre-workout and roll it into a thing of socks and hide it on the bottom layer. And they tore through my room.

They're like, what the fuck is this? I'm like, here's my profile for it. He's like, you're a piece of shit. I'm like, I know. And he's like, whatever. Not ammunition. Moving on. He goes into coffee's room and I'm standing outside my dorm again.

And inside is here. The sergeant go, why don't you just tell me what's in these socks? I just hear caught coffees, like six, five big deep was C4. What? The pre-workout. he goes why are why are you putting pre-workout in your socks specialist we're not allowed to have food in here and i like working out you're a fucking retard and he just stormed out into the next room oh c4 the whole it was the quietest moment of my life. All I could hear was just like tinnitus.

Just like... C4. What? You ever do that? You ever give a cop a rabbit to go chase and then you've got the other... You'll be like, hey, you got anything on? You're like, I've got this ounce of weed. I know I'm not supposed to have it.

That can give me trouble. Is that it? You're like, yeah. You're like, all right, man right man i appreciate your honesty here you go and you've got like two ounces in your pocket so one time i saw that these cops were coming up on us and i knew we were about to get pulled over we were in a hotel parking lot at like probably 3 45 in the morning oh i would definitely say hello to you yeah yeah weird like healthy light in the eyes type of jd i am now i look like jd fresh out of auschwitz right my life literally going up to you because i've done it so many times would i would i would sneak around because you'd probably be like you know pre whatever with some other bullshit and i turn

my lights off when i park and i get out of the car and i knock on the window and i literally go hello friend hello friend and see them go so i know that they're coming up and i know pretty much the rundown anytime i get pulled over at this point i'm getting pulled out of the car i'm getting handcuffed yeah like that's just that's what time it is there's gonna be more units pulling up with my record it's not like a nice conversation between me and you nowadays i don't i don't know i haven't tried it in a while i haven't been pulled over in in many years try it could be fun uh yeah but you know with my history, what's likely to happen is that there's going to be, you know, three or four and I'm going to get, you know, handcuffed me on my back. I knew that was happening. So I had about a half ounce of dope, which is a trafficking amount in the state

of Florida for meth, uh, 14 grams. And that's my real issue. And I know that I've got other little bags of dope or whatever, but I put it between my waistband on my underwear and my where my belt on my jeans are behind my back because i don't have time to get rid of this and get it off of me i'm in i'm in a van and um you know they take me out they cuff me my hands are behind my back and so i start an argument with the cop because they're these are big shards and they're i'm like he's gonna hear these hit the ground like these are big chunks of crystal meth and i'm dumping it out behind my back while i'm making eye contact and yelling at this cop like i don't even want to yell at this cop it's not this cop's fault but i need to distract him and i need to be loud right

now so loud noises and shit like that and i'm dumping this out behind my back in the car and i need to be loud right now so loud noises and shit like that and i'm dumping the out behind my back in the car and i'm in this in the parking lot okay and i'm like trying to stomp out the shards to where they're like not noticeable and he had me up against the back of my van and i stuffed the baggie uh sort of behind the license plate just a tiny little bit where it was sticking out so there's like all this shard on the ground and shit but i'm like yelling at him and he's yelling at me and we're like spittle is flying and then as soon as i get it to where i'm like okay i think i just got away with that i was like you know what i'm being an asshole i'm sorry man like let's let's talk like like gentlemen go ahead you can search my car it's fine because i knew he was gonna find some and

he did he found a small amount but like that there's like use amount and like whatever yeah that trafficking amount bro is like you know that's like 15 years i'm not trying to do 15 years in prison i'll i'll go sit for you know a few months but if i can avoid the 15 years in prison yeah so that's kind of like doing the rabbit thing i had um it wasn't me i don't know who it was. I think we know who it was, but I was driving around in a car one day and I always check our cars and our cars had like the hard plastic seats in the back so you couldn't hide shit, but it had a lip. So guys would like go under the lip and lift up the lip and try to shove stuff in it. Everything and anything.

If it's loose, somebody will try to throw it and stuff shit in it. And so, you know, every time when I go start my shift, we look in the car, there's nothing in there. We like, you know, swoop the chairs and make sure there's nothing in there. Then we get an arrest, you know, or we just put somebody in the back and you check it every time you lay come in and out. Right. So we get an arrest and we take the guy out down at cell block and we're looking through the back to see if there's anything and we're like, and it wasn't our normal car. and we're like okay cool there's nothing in here and then my partner and i are like hey the the seat that's like supposed to be riveted in at this one part like right where your the back of your bent knees

would go it's like kind of loose there's like a rivet missing like pull it let's pull that shit up because that seems kind of loose you could definitely fit some in there this much coke somebody left and it wasn't our guy it wasn't our guys we patted the fuck out of it like we Let's pull that shit up because that seems kind of loose. You could definitely fit some shit in there. This much coke. Somebody left. It wasn't our guy. It wasn't our guys. We patted the fuck out of it. We searched guys before we put them in the car.

Now, we're not in your pockets every time unless you're under arrest. But this guy was under arrest, so we went in his pockets, right? But even if we don't put you under arrest and you're detained, we'll do the cursory search outside. And then if feel a bulge we're like what the is this you know and then we'll figure out the cop way to like get it so it's not thrown out but somebody put a dude in a car and he was able to find that little spot lift it up enough and throw in like a couple ounces of fucking coke so let me ask you this have you ever done coke no you've never done coke no have you ever done any illegal drugs uh marijuana marijuana okay like i don't think that that we should be giving you a rest rich like i think maybe maybe maybe 12 times like i can literally count it on my two hands like yeah

i'm not done with that much i'm not like i'm an alcohol guy but i'm not i've smoked everything else out of me smoked loads of weed i can't do it anymore it gives me the fear after i came out of prison like if i smoke it i'm like they're bringing the dogs they're about to raid the cell they're gonna search us get that up in your butthole brother dogs are on their way oh no but um yeah i don't think we should be giving people felonies like that are gonna stay on their record for their life for possession i i just i don't it doesn't like that was my very first felony was a possession of meth and then i was like you know and this is the wrong mindset but it is it's stigmatizing like you so anytime i ever go fill out for a job application or housing you know or you know when i tried to join the military and they're like,

go fuck yourself. Yeah. I had one felony and it was just for like a minor possession of, of meth, but it was a felony that lasted on my, my record forever. One thing I do think Oregon has done, right.

They decriminalized all drugs and they didn't get the treatment in place. They fumbled the ball. They could have actually done something, but they never actually execute the plan the way the plan is supposed to go and it ends up fucking people up oh the government yeah never yeah we talked about that the other day was like they spent a huge amount for legalization of drugs needled uh the places where you can get free needles dispensaries or dispensaries and then uh them to inject for you and then the it was supposed to have also hey we have this in place now in order for this to work we need the rehabilitation centers yeah the treatment centers and they're like oh well we

don't got money for that so then no we organ became portland right now yeah we what we did instead is we we just started giving people boxes of of crack uh crack pipes and cases of needles and it's not even a one-for-one exchange so needle exchanges work and they really help uh to stop like blood-borne diseases like you know the transmission of hiv in a place like florida where it's illegal to go and buy clean needles is astronomical compared to like places where they have one for one exchanges. But do you know, give people, you know, a box of needles and when they bring a full box back, they get their next box. So every needle is accounted for instead of giving out cases of fucking needles and not worrying about where they go. Cause where do they go? They end

up in the streets. You know, they end up in parks, they end up in bad places. There was just zero accountability and no focus on treatment. And that ended up hurting us. The one thing I do agree with that they did was when they went to recriminalize it, they didn't make it a felony. They made it a new level of misdemeanor where they can hold people for long enough for people to dry out out and you know not still be physically going through withdrawals but it's not a felony that's going to stay on your record for the rest of your life yeah so i while i have both of you here i have a question i don't know i mean well no i mean i'm in i have cody who would know and then i have you that would also know the other end of the spectrum

so i just like um you had me at cody i was gonna i keep flying to texas for a reason let me tell you yeah vanessa's competition bleep that part out um no so i don't can you get a felony so like how do i want to word this i i always think about like gun uh stuff like gun laws. So I, cause you can get a felony if I were to like carry concealed carry a gun in the state of Illinois. Cause I don't have a concealed carry permit and it could be a felony, even though that's a state law. So I don't understand how states can impose felonies at different levels. Or am I just fucking that up?

No, it's crazy. So like even things that are like, like should be constitutional rights uh you know what i'm saying like second amendment rights for example there's i believe in the state of texas and don't quote me on this because this is my first time here and nobody scream at me i'm very sensitive i'll come but um ah so uh like i think in texas like felons are allowed to have guns in their own home like a gun in their own home for the protection of their own home.

You know, the state of Florida, a felon can't do that. In the state of Oregon, there is a process for you to be able to get your Second Amendment rights back, even with felonies still actively on your record. And most other states don't have that. But voting rights is a prime example of state-to-state shit that does not make sense there's certain states that let you vote while you're still in prison they're bringing you your ballot there's ones that let you vote as soon as you get out whether you're on paper or not some you have to wait till you're off paper and some tennessee will never ever let you vote again if you have a felony in the state of Tennessee, like, you know, jelly roll can speak in front of Congress,

but he can't fucking vote because he has felonies in Tennessee. So we, I kind of touched on in the car and then I want to end the conversation. I wanted to add smaller fingers and corn dogs, but I want to ask you on the podcast. Cause so like with the, the gun laws in particular and the voting like i kind of feel like if you're out and you're through the entire um probation program and like you're reintegrated in society shouldn't you just have all of your rights back i mean we can have a little bit of gray area where like okay well if you were involved with a crime with a gun maybe you

shouldn't be allowed to conceal carry anymore or whatever. But like, if you're reintegrated into society and you've done the time, why are you treated differently still? I think that, I think that you're 100% right on that. I think that if I have done all of the work to pay my debt to society and I'm actively a part of, you know, working law abiding citizen, I should have all of my rights given back to me. But there are certain stipulations like if you, you know, used your penis in a crime, we shouldn't let you have a penis. Like I said, chemical castration, you know, physical castration. And I know they don't actually cut the penis off.

Speaker 1 1.0 Just a tip. a little off the top but you know like if you if you used a gun in a violent crime do i think that you should be automatically restored to your your second amendment rights no i don't i i don't think that's reasonable because you're you know you're a higher risk with that do i think that there should be some way to be able to work towards that in the future even if you used a gun in your crime yeah but i think you should have to do a strict criteria and it should be up for a review well that's what i'm saying like i feel like you shouldn't be done with the rehabilitation process unless you're fully rehabilitated but there's no emphasis on rehabilitation right in the criminal

justice system in the department of corrections case by case yeah yeah to a degree yeah but i mean like there's no i don't in my opinion if you get busted for white collar tax evasion because you're a sketchy accountant yeah and you do your time and you go through you know rehab and everything it's like yeah well i don't know a sketchy accountant who will do some tax evasion for somebody? First of all, first of all, it's tax avoidance. I agree with JD on that one.

Like if you, if you commit a violent crime with a gun, like maybe you shouldn't have your fucking right. For sure. Maybe you shouldn't have a gun, but like, as you're saying, if you're a dude that got a felony because you skimped out on taxes and

shit, or you're a dad doing seven years. Cause you beat up your son's attacker. Yeah. Yeah. Like, or like, like,

like they should never have any rights ever again. They should be killed. But yeah, if you're, if you're kind of what I'm alluding to, let's say, let's say you fucking, you sold a pound of weed and got put away for five years.

Yeah. You should probably, you should probably be allowed to have your fucking rights reinstated yeah yeah your rights reinstated once you get out i guess that's just my point i feel like the the stigma of like felon in not all but most cases lasts too long to where it's like okay well you're here go forth join rejoin the world but also you're a second classclass citizen but not really but also stick with you yeah that's what i mean it's like i feel like that would absolutely

influence me to it needs to be resentful if not drive you to crime again being treated like a second-class citizen all the time this is the most and like i regret having this mindset at the time but you know 23 years old i get my first felony and i know that i'm stuck with this for life it's like it doesn't matter if i have one felony or 58 felonies i still have to check that box but that's the point now here i sit with 58 felonies on my record because i look like a monster on paper and i was but like 58 but most of those applications are are you a felon yes or no it's not how many yeah so it's like one 58 yeah you have 58 felonies 58 damn too short of 60

you got a gold-plated car to steal after that? You're a fucking felon. 58? I thought you were going to be like four. I almost got the federal retirement plan. I was real close to catching that 30 in the feds. Can we film a skit where Rich and Cody arrest you and you call for backup?

Can you do that? I have to be wearing pants. 58? I'm still taken aback by that but i think it's very look at what you're doing now which is like my favorite part of it it is look where you can be but where you are now and no one has excuses of why they don't turn their life around or why they can't have a successful life you are like like the embodiment of like, hey, this is terrible. Fifty ninth chances. You guys would not have let me into your homes

six years ago. I promise you. You would not have let me into your homes just by looking at me. You would have been like, absolutely the fuck not. Get off of my lawn. But, you know,

that's part of the whole thing that I try to impress on people so much because there's so many people out there who don't know that they can change. They don't know their own potential. They've been selling themselves short and undervaluing who they are as a human being, because you are all worth it. You all have value to give as long as you're a person, not a, um, like if I could do it, anybody can do it. Anybody can do it. it it's hard work you can't be a fucking and beat addiction and beat your your generational curses and your mental health issues but the hard work is so 100 worth it and the person that you could be is so much more than you give yourself credit

for and literally i was as fucking bad bad as an addict can get. You know, I've done everything except use a needle to get high. You know, I boofed, smoked, snorted. Mayonnaise. Mayonnaise. Green mayonnaise. I just want people to know that as long as you're still breathing, there's hope. And also people whose loved ones are out there, man. There's so many people whose parents have been in this cycle of addiction their entire lives,

whose kids are stuck in this cycle of addiction, whose loved ones are out there and they're just watching them deteriorate. And I've been on both sides of that fence, man. I left my fucking mother crying in a hotel parking lot. She hunted me down, found out where I was, and I came walking up just vibrating high on meth. And she told me like, and I love my mom. I've always loved my mom. I have such solid parents, bro. They've rode out with me the whole way. And she told me, if you keep doing this, I cannot be involved in

your life, please. I've got a bed at rehab. And she's like crying and like everything in me wanted to just hug my mom and say, okay, mom. Okay. But I wasn't at the steering wheel anymore. That's part of the nasty animal that addiction is. And it doesn't just hurt the person who has the addiction. It kills everyone around them. I left my mom crying in that fucking parking lot and went back to the hotel room that I was at and sobbed in the bathroom. So I didn't have control. There was one time where I knew that I had, I was, I had a suspended sentence for prison time. And, uh, this was part of what led up to my 39 months. Uh, my PO had scheduled me for a UA and I knew three days beforehand, at least I had to stop smoking meth because it was going to be

in my system. And then I'd go to prison. And so, you know, that, that first day of the three days, I was like, I'll just drink extra water, like the bargaining. And this is going to work out somehow until finally it's the morning, like 10 minutes before I need to go in to see my PO and get a UA. And I'm like, I have a big bag of meth and I'm just smoking as much as I can in the parking lot. Cause I'm like, if I'm going to go in, I'm going to go in as high as I can. But like knowing that like, I'm not in control. This owns me. I'm this shit's bitch.

And luckily like I walked in and he didn't UA me that day. It was the weirdest thing. I think he knew that I was just higher than draft. And he was like, I don't want to send this kid to prison. Like, you know, and I'm not sure really how that worked or why, but you know, there's so many periods of my life where I just knew that I was just out of control and it was as bad as it could get. And I was able to turn it around so you can turn it around.

Your loved one can turn it around. As long as the person is still breathing there's always hope what was that and what was that moment for you where you're like fuck secret service comes out of the bushes with the SWAT team it's it's SWAT team uh secret service operation the SWAT team's in the bushes in this parking lot in St. Lucie uh Florida um and they've got automatic weapons pointed at my head. Uh, they've got, you know, the, the masks on they're wearing camouflage fatigues and they're coming out of the bushes pointed at me. And most people would have like an, Oh shit moment. I just threw my hands in the air and put them on my head. And I like breathed a sigh of relief.

I had tried to myself twice within the 30 days, ending up, you know, leading up to that. And it wasn't like some cry for help. Cause I didn't really tell anybody. I was just like, I felt like I was asking the universe permission to just leave. Cause I, I didn't want to be here anymore. Then when they came out of the bushes and those guns were in my face, I just knew it was over. I knew it was over. And I was like, I put my hands on my head and I breathed a sigh of relief. And I said, please don't shoot my dog. Like my dog's not going to like you. She don't like police, but she's not going to bite you. She's like small. Don't shoot my fucking dog. One of the dudes from the secret service came over and this dude,

like I didn't, I did not think this dude was law enforcement. He was yatted the back and he was wearing Dickies. And, you know, he looked like 100% looked like somebody that I would have hung out with if I wasn't a strung out piece of shit. And he came up, he's like, bro, I'm a dog lover. What's your dog's name? And he took good care of my dog. I ended up getting my dog back.

Like he made sure that my dog came back to me once I got out of jail. That was my turning point, man. That was my turning point. Cause I realized that I would do anything that it took to stop this cycle. And, uh, and you know, I just got opportunity after opportunity. The judge offered me the opportunity to go to treatment. Um, you know, I was given, uh, the opportunity by, uh, by Florida, Sam H the substance abuse and mental health. They gave me a scholarship to get my training that I couldn't afford because I was making $300 a week working in treatment. And they wanted me to get my peer recovery, my, my peer recovery

certification. And they, they paid for my shit. The state of Florida paid for my to get certified. Like just so many people went out of their way to try to help me. And I always try to impress upon people. If you get into the right circles, go to a meeting. If you want to know how to fucking quit, there are NA and AA meetings in every city, in every town, all across the world. And whether the 12 steps is something that ends up being your final destination or not, there are people there that will help you. I know a lot of people that have aversions to the 12 steps because, uh, you know, they can't get around the whole higher power, the whole God thing. There's smart recovery out there, but you have to start

somewhere, go and find some people who have been where you are and they found their way out and those people want to help you i promise you they want to see you succeed we don't hate addicts in those rooms we are all addicts and we don't judge you we don't look down on you go in and ask for help and people will fucking help you and you can find a way out but it takes asking somebody who's actually been there because there could be somebody with every degree on the wall that's prevalent to what i need to be able to save my life and i won't be able to hear it from some ned flanders the way i'll be able to hear it from somebody who's been in the fucking gutter or on that prison yard you know it's it's there's like ptsd and any generous yeah how you reflect and how you, you share a bond because you know,

they went through the exact same thing. Service members need, need peer support from people who've been through it. That's literally what peer support is. People that are in law enforcement need to have peer support from people that have been through it and lost, you know, uh,

kindred souls, law enforcement. Yeah. You know, first responders, it's, I don't think that there's nearly enough peer support for first responders right now i think that that's something that we need more of an emphasis on because imagine going to work every day and you see the absolute worst of humanity

you see kids getting you see kids getting killed you see the elderly getting abused you know what i'm saying you see all of this horrific shit. And then you're hated. That's your reality. And people, people, you know, ACAB you and people degrade you and people, you know, it's fucked up, man. Like, it's a thankless job. It really is a thankless job. And, you know, there are cops out there who abuse their authority. But also imagine, you know, just after an amount of time that it has to wear on people. You know what I'm saying?

You get to see somebody else's worst day of their life. Every day, every day. You have maybe like 10 minutes between calls. If you're lucky, you know, you might think a cop's a asshole when he's on a call for you for trespassing or for,

you know, you know you know disturbing the public he might have just come from a fucking dead kid bro and not had time to be able to process that and then you come at him with attitude and you know you're getting attitude back and you're like oh well you should be professional bro fuck you respect is given and received you know it has to be a two-way street it's my new best friend i know dude watching cody's like just demeanor he's like this guy gets it yeah a dude with 58 felonies just described what police work is in like two minutes and that's why you're so important i think like and i want to say thank you from all of us thank you so much for

getting past your trials and tribulations and now you're you're doing god's work you're helping so many different communities at the same time and it's a rarity and i i will say thank you yeah 58 felonies i would have never guessed that but hearing that fucking number and then seeing where you are now and the success you're still growing because you're dude you're just like you're at a hill right now and the success you're still growing. Cause you're dude, you're just like, you're at a hill right now and you're going to keep growing, which is amazing to see an experience. So thank you.

Fucking. Thank you for that. Honestly, bro. God put me into places that I had no business being in. I've gotten grace way beyond what I deserved. And that comes with an inherent responsibility to respect those blessings and reach back and do whatever I can for others.

So like being your friend for a while, one thing you always harp on is like officer discretion i've heard you say it 50 000 times it's like he just described getting discretion from every different level of the criminal justice system and it got him to where he is today to a certain extent right i mean you continued to make the right decisions after they gave you the chance but yeah it all was possible because people kept giving you the opportunity to and that and that small discretion right now you are the one that will change lives right and that because you get to see how far you can fall and then where you can get even after that if you don't go up and you follow the steps for whatever you're going through but also like hey i'm gonna follow the law i'm gonna follow my steps i'm gonna beat addiction and now success is like

the moon's the limit which is ah i fucking love it brother i love it dude cody you're gonna see cody like seeing cody like that reflection on cody he's just like we're silently he's just like this dude fucking gets it bro like you just spoke you you opened up to it like you you connected with a cop without like gets it dude i've trauma bonded with with multiple officers and even bro even while i was out there and i was absolutely lost some of the times that i was arrested it was a fucking rescue mission and those cops were there to uh involuntarily save my life bro you know what i'm saying i know there's times that i would have been dead if if officers hadn't shown up and taken me off the streets they saved my life they probably

saved other people's lives by taking me off the streets and you know it was god working through them to intervene to make sure that i could be here today. So I have to assume there's a reason and I have to assume that it's to help others. Dude. Well, as we close this out, before we go to the after show, uh, where, where can we find you? You amazing human, or can the people find you? I should say. So if anybody wants to find me, I'm JD delay 5150 across all platforms. Um, I'm on YouTube, Tik TOK, TikTok, Facebook, Insta, soon to be Patreon, and I will be with these guys.

Anytime they call me out and ask me to be here, I will be with these guys because this has been one of the greatest days of doing content and making new friends that I've ever had. I appreciate you guys for having me here. Cody, close us out, you beautiful son of a bitch. Everyone, thank you for joining the

unsubscribed podcast today. I was joined today by Eli Double Tap, Fat Electrician, J.D. DeLay, myself, Donut Operator, and you can catch us all on Patreon on the after show. We love you. Kisses. Goodbye. We're going to go play high and such now We'll see you on the next one.