Unsubscribe Podcast - 209 - Habitually Fat & Angry - The Kinda Consensual Crossover | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 209

Episode Date: April 21, 2025

The crossover episode everyone wanted. The Kinda Unsub mashup! BID FOR NIC'S 1 OF 1 COMMUNISM SHOES: https://www.ebay.com/itm/286460366702 LIMITED EDITION AUTISM CHARITY SHIRTS: https://www.bunkerbranding.com/collections/unsubscribe-podcast-shirts LIMITED EDITION TISM SHOES: https://www.bunkerbranding.com/collections/unsub-shoes Watch this episode ad-free and uncensored on Pepperbox! https://www.pepperbox.tv/ WATCH THE AFTERSHOW & BTS ON PATREON! https://www.patreon.com/UnsubscribePodcast ------------------------------ THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS! THE PERFECT JEAN F*%k your khakis and get The Perfect Jean Get 15% off with the code UNSUB15 at https://theperfectjean.nyc/UNSUB15 #theperfectjeanpod GHOSTBED Got to https://GhostBed.com/unsubscribe to receive 50% off sitewide! SHOPIFY Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial and start selling today at https://shopify.com/unsubpod ------------------------------ UNSUB MERCH: https://www.bunkerbranding.com/pages/unsubscribe-podcast ------------------------------ FOLLOW THE HOSTS: Eli_Doubletap https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://www.twitch.tv/Eli_Doubletap https://x.com/Eli_Doubletap https://www.youtube.com/c/EliDoubletap Brandon Herrera https://www.youtube.com/@BrandonHerrera https://x.com/TheAKGuy https://www.instagram.com/realbrandonherrera Donut Operator https://www.youtube.com/@DonutOperator https://x.com/DonutOperator https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator The Fat Electrician https://www.youtube.com/@the_fat_electrician https://thefatelectrician.com/ https://www.instagram.com/the_fat_electrician https://www.tiktok.com/@the_fat_electrician ------------------------------ unsubscribe pod podcast episode ep unsub funny comedy military army comedian texas podcasts #podcast #comedy #funnypodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Podcast Intro ️ 00:07:06 - Podcast Welcome 00:15:13 - Autism Awareness ️ 00:22:46 - Twitter Bullying 00:29:34 - SLAM Missile Design 00:36:55 - F-35: Smart Computer 00:50:36 - Interviewing Time 01:05:16 - Homicide Notified 01:12:00 - Reasonable Suspicion 01:19:16 - Brandon's Award 01:26:29 - Berlin Airlift ️ 01:33:43 - Influencer Trip 01:40:34 - Meeting Cody 01:47:40 - Come Here Fat Boy 01:54:43 - Eli Joins Group 02:01:37 - Angry Meme Review 02:08:37 - Getting Married? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What's better than a well-marbled ribeye sizzling on the barbecue? A well-marbled ribeye sizzling on the barbecue that was carefully selected by an Instacart shopper and delivered to your door. A well-marbled ribeye you ordered without even leaving the kiddie pool. Whatever groceries your summer calls for, Instacart has you covered. Download the Instacart app and enjoy $0 delivery fees on your first three orders. Service fees, exclusions, and terms apply. Instacart. Grocer $0 delivery fees on your first three orders. Service fees, exclusions, and terms apply. Instacart, groceries that over-deliver. It's us versus them today. Okay. Don't embarrass me in front of my friends.

You know it's good when the brand name is... I'm sorry, that's f***ed up. I shouldn't like make fun of that. Yes, that's the worst thing that's been said on this podcast. I don't know how much of that you can say, but that's up to you. The investigation's over. Oh, so we're good? Buckle up, buttercup. Say hi to Eli.

He's racially ambiguous. Brandon, his hair is f***ing fabulous. fucking fabulous donut a dark joke disposition and there's a fat electrician welcome to unsubscribe ready for this okay you gotta say hey hey do you know what month it is? It is April 17th. We're doing Autism Awareness Month. Uh-huh.

Because we're helping people with... Autism. Yeah? Mm-hmm. Autism. You put a big smile on your face? Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Bruh. That's not a smile. That's not... There's a real smile. You little goober hey first off thank you so much for the freaking insane response already we just broke fifty thousand dollars in money made so far you all always show up and step up to the plate and really make a difference ah We cannot ask for a better community. The best community ever. Is it? Yeah?

Do you love them? How much? That much. You love them that much? That's crazy. I love you, big boy. Give me a kiss. Thank you. Now, I know what you're thinking.

Eli, what the... That shirt, thinking. What Eli? What the? That shirt though. What is that shirt? Weaponize autism. Caution. Autism. Intentional special interests. ASD. No eye contact. This is my favorite freaking shirt we have ever done. And part of it is because of all

of you. We read the comments. We read the responses. And you guys asked for even better design for this month. You know what? Y'all deserve that. Easy. And you deserve this next thing. All the old autism shirts are going to be up for sale for the remaining of the month.

And 100% of all these profits are going towards those amazing causes so thank you thank you now how do we make this even better and how do we raise even more money i had an idea sorry bud introducing the tisms that's right they are called the Tisms. We wanted to launch a pair of shoes that represent being different but also being awesome at the same time and I think these I'm so proud of these. And on top of that any money spent will enter you to win some amazing stuff these shoes yep that safe over there worth a couple thousand dollars yep eli what about the full metal spectrum shirt even better we have a one-of-one helmet that we'll be giving away too look at this board dude thank you so much tommy Tommy and Hardheaded Veterans for making this.

Also Maximus Knives creating a one-of-one blade. It looks amazing and it is hand forged. And down in the link below you'll be able to bid on these bad boys. Fat electricians one of one. I love communism shoes. Shame he never wore them. But we know we could probably raise a good chunk of change for these. And then 100% of whatever we raise will be going towards that final number at the end of the month. It's a whole bunch of stuff to buy and a whole lot of chances to win. You looking at signs? Show the camera.

Guys, gals, I hope you enjoyed this episode and more importantly, thank you from the bottom of our hearts for making stuff like this possible for me, for the guys, for Raiden, and for all the individuals out there

that will truly benefit from something like this. Keep doing amazing things. We are so thankful on this side. Each and every day, you change this little man's life. Y'all did that and you changed my life. So thank you always. And this is how I pay it forward.

And I'm gonna continue to pay it forward until I take my last breath. I'm blessed, continue to pay it forward until I take my last breath. I'm blessed. We're blessed. And now because of you, we can bless others. I hope you all know how much you mean to us. Thank you from the bottom of all our hearts.

Love y'all. Community. Right. You want to say something to the camera? I like making signs. What kind of signs? Prohibited signs. Thank you for the happy birthday.

And to the parents out there, this might be something you can do. Ryan and me still do it to this day. Ready, Ryan? Let's do the 10. Talk in here. I'm smart. I'm handsome.

I'm funny. I make people laugh. I make people smile. I always help others. I'll never give up Always want to smile, more than me And more than a soul, so proud of me Hey smile butt Hey big smile butt

Stop stop bye love you guys let's light this candle we'll wait on that guy with the face over there and the beard not the brown one the slightly whiter one which guy? green eyes bearded dragon

of the KKK Which guy? Green Eyes Bearded. The racist one. Green Eyes Bearded Dragon. Of the KKK. We're like 30 seconds in. It's the Grand Bearded Green Eyes Bearded Dragon. Green Eyes Grand Dragon. Oh my god. Green Eyes Bearded Dragon has told us all the

darks. Why am I in all the racist episodes? It's time. You're not a host. I know, but I'm on all the racist episodes. You're not a host. Oh, that's fair. Because I'm fucking here, dude. That's how we're gonna start it. And now we just go, sorry.

Oh. Fuck. Scrotum. that's how we're gonna start it and now we just go three oh i don't know why i just kept looking around the table like it was gonna materialize three two one hi everyone welcome to the unsubscribed podcast i'm joined today by eli double tap fat electrician angry cops habitual line crosser, Brandon Herrera, myself, Donut Operator. You are getting into a star-studded podcast today. What's going to happen? We don't know.

It's unsub versus kind of consensual, literally. We are. The battle. We're also here, kind of consensually. We forced this to happen. Well, I will say, we can't do all the stories that are out there because all Brandon's are still classified. Fuck off. Rich, are you going to say something?

Oh, yeah. Hey, how much did you spit onto this microphone? My God, it is visibly wet. No, that's from the thing. Sorry. Can you fit your mouth around it? You just do the gluck gluck 9000. I don't know.

It's a right of passage right here. Yes, I remember. I was on like right after you did it. You just do the gluck gluck 9000. I don't know. It's a right of passage. Yes, I remember. I was on like right after you did it. Here we go. Hey. Hey. Hold on to my hand real quick. Okay, we're having a conversation. It's us versus them today.

Okay. Okay. Don't embarrass me in front of my friends. You're embarrassing me in front of the wizard. I guess that's it, folks. I'm going to go ahead and wrap up. I'm going to just. You're starting it. All right.

I'm going to shut up. There we go. Until Richard cares, he's dressing for success. He looks just like me, drinking a bush light and everything. I'm just saying you can be replaced. So, you know, just letting you know, Eli, if you ever need somebody to fill in that can be, you know, as equally

ignorant and hairy, then I'm there for you. I need to hear your best. Today we're going to talk about a whole bunch of people doing some stuff at a time that I wasn't a part of and I'm going to get upset about it. Delete me.

Where's my hot wife so I can put guns in and not have to pay for them? At least it's entertaining. Check out the woman that I banged. Ta-da. Eli, what are we talking about today? I have so much to do. We'll just start this one off with the charities.

We'll go into that, but before we do that, remember this fucking thing? Oh no. I opened it. Dear God. That was the worst thing I've ever done. Is that what we're doing? I would, I would. Spelling salts?

The world's strongest one? Oh, the things that Connor was freebasing? So this sealed, sealed and sealed was like. It'll short circuit your brain for a second. So I opened it and was like it'll short-circuit your brain for a second so I opened it and was like I wonder I reset I just started hopping around I hit my back of my head a couple times or into the bathroom really right before yeah I was I was a girl I dude that's is it just ammonia yeah it's just ammonia isn't it you know it's good when the brand name is I like my heart's going oh my god rich where's my heart going that's that's sealed in It's in my white cloth. Oh.

Oh. I didn't want that to smell. It does burn the nostrils. That smells like embalming fluid, man. Oh, my God. And for the camera, that is sealed sealed. That is in a sealed case. So I accidentally opened that before this. Dude, Connor loves this stuff.

I want it. No, you didn't. Dude, this, this? When you? King Trial was freebasing that shit. Just come on camera first before you do. Just don't go.

Just the tiniest. Oh, that's nothing. You're just fucking babies like it is a full fucking reset I'm gonna go for a walk dude he did what I did You don't smell You're like oh that's not that You can see how much my eyes are watering right

Yeah oh I just saw Connor get force reset Dude it yeah He held down the power button for five seconds I watched him do the playstation 2 like still getting with some of the cubes bro that was the worst experience i've had in a long time i was like man i want to nap so bad i'll just do like uh uh what is and wide awake i don't want to knock anymore no all right i want more huh i'm still getting whiffs of it. Did it drip somewhere?

I'm getting it too. Oh, God. Are you going to open the thingy too? Big boys with muscles do those, right? Open it and then give it a little... There we go. Welcome to Unsub. Joe Rogan talks about that, the awe. You have to open it, Brandon.

I'm smelling it from here. It's wild. It just smells like cat pee. Take it, take it, take it. Oh, God, I'm getting residuals. Yeah. That shit has some recoil. Alright, you boys want wanna do a podcast now

let's fucking kill him oh my god starting defense sit at the table ah f***ing rich how's the Merv doing man I've got three of them now you have what

you have two they're multiplying I have three cause when we did the we did the podcast up there in Buffalo you still you still doing it yeah sorry i'm just i'm not

all right we came up there for buffalo and you had you brought the mervel for us it was fucking amazing you have three now i have three oh so yeah i've got the the merve 19 which is the one you guys are on what is the merve so the merve is the morale response vehicle for everybody that doesn't know it's a fire truck that i was able to take and over the course of like a couple years during COVID turn into like a massive tailgating mobile. And I take veterans and first responders out to Bill's games and go to their birthday party or stag in Western New York. And we get them hammered, all the booze.

I put the booze on it. And it's sponsored by you. You have the Donut Operator Gaming Station where I have an N64 with some classic games on it. Ooh. Throwback. Gold 9. So you have the MIRV-19. That's the OG one.

I have the MIRV-13, which my buddy uses primarily for the KIA Memorial Rock March in Western New York every August. It's a veteran non-for-profit. And then we just got the new one, and it's a massive rescue. And it's like 10 feet wide and when you open up the storage containers or the storage doors you can look through to the other side like you could just slide 30 racks of bush light from one side to the other and it's got this large pull out like metal like hook wall you know like you hang tools on the wall like old workshops and stuff like that you can pull it out and our plan is to put tvs on either side of it so did you just get that we got

that last uh we got it like early autumn of uh 2024 so that's got to get a sound system put into it it's got a it's got an 18 foot spotlight on top of it so you can light up the area. It's got... The indoor seating area has a desk and five outlets. It's got a skylight. It's a little intense. Basically, if you guys don't know what Rich is putting down, he takes old

fire trucks and turns them into the coolest fucking bars ever. I'm a bad bitch. And then you pick us up in it. Oh, you did pick us up in it. And play Miley Cyrus in the USA. I like how all the other live shows, it's like, drop us off in the back. And then we go to Buffalo. It's like, pull up with the sirens on.

In the Murph. That's my town. That's my people. Own that shit. Oh, autism month. This will shit. Oh, Autism Month. This will be, what, this week? Next week? Speaking of fire trucks, Autism Month.

Yeah. I mean, that's as autistic as it gets. Yeah, dude. Trucks and trains. Yeah. See? Oh, and planes. And planes.

Yeah, we got the huge month going on, so we're trying to crush 250,000, but we have a safe. We have the new autism shoes. We have the bidding for your one-of-one communism shoes. We have, I will say, like, moms love this shirt. Traveling? I've never been stopped by females for shirts. Oh, my God. My son's autistic.

I love that shirt. I love that shirt. Oh, that's a really dope shirt. I was like, oh, I like this. This is universal. It's not aggressive. Do you like MILFs that are definitely going to be packing snacks? really dope shirt. I was like, Oh, I like this. This is universal. It's not aggressive. Do you like milfs that are definitely going to be packing snacks? Wear that shirt.

Don't get laid. So go check that shit out. We're super stoked for that. And, uh, you've all crushing it. So this is my free juice box shirt. You know what I'm going to have as an after sex snack,

your gushers and some of that string an after sex snack? Your gushers. And some of that string cheese. New daddy ate my gushers. I do not like him. I will set fire to his truck. Daddy ate my gushers. That's the real next autism show. New daddy ate my gushers.

It's just a kid just like this with like an evil face. That could be a Halloween shirt too. It's the same face, but you put the Freddy Krueger fingers on it. Comfort. Comfort. Hey, Eli. What's up, Brandon? Just getting ready for today's ad.

Oh, you mean the perfect jean, Brandon? I do mean the perfect jean. You want to touch my jeans, Brandon? I do mean the perfect gene. You want to touch my jeans, Brandon? Jeez, fuck! Thank you for that. Picture this. 700,000... Hold on, picture me. Okay, go.

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or just google The Perfect Gene and use code UNSUB15 for 15% off. It's time to stop crushing your balls and uncomfortable jeans by heading over to theperfectgene.nyc. Fuck your khakis. Free returns and free exchanges when you use code UNSUB15 at checkout. And one more time, our listeners, get 15% off your first order plus free shipping. Once again, that's code unsub15 at checkout. After your purchase, they're going to ask you who sent you. This is not like a fight club thing where you don't talk about it. Please, by all means, tell them that we sent you their way. And remember, fuck your khakis. Get the perfect jean. Have we talked about how much your son loved New York? Oh, no. I don't know if we

talked about riding. You took riding out and he loved New York? Oh, no. I don't know if we talked about riding. You took riding out and he loved New York. He loved seeing all the sights and stuff. We had one day to knock out all of New York's buildings because riding had a schedule to keep. And there was like seven places plus the schedule to keep. Yeah. How bad does he want to go to Dubai? Paris is his.

Really? Yeah, he wants really Paris and England because he's like, and then I can see the Louvre and this and this and this and this. I'm like, okay, cool. So New York was land go. Walk and walk. And I was like, he's going to want to go home soon. Yeah. Homeboy.

Other than when we went to the Statue of Liberty, he got really good, like really fucking good photo. Happy. Also cold. So he was miserable. He came back. I was like, ready to ride the double back, duck or a bus back,

buddy, which he usually loves. He's like, no, I want to take a taxi. I am sleepy. I was like, are you sure?

And the double decker bus, you love those. Like, no, I am good daddy. I was like, okay. We hopped in,

got home, passed out. He had the time of his life and yeah, now he's like, okay we hopped in got home passed out he had the time of his life and yeah now he's like okay that was great now i want to go to uh i think oh dc oh no yeah gross yeah and then you get to find out they charge a hundred dollars per person right at the top of like the empire state building or anything wow that's a hundred dollars to go to the top of the empire state building. Probably part of the congestion tax.

Thanks. Kathy Hochul. It's expensive. Idiot. Expensive. Pay a hundred dollars to go to the top. You'd have to be retarded. I don't even. Hi,

I'm Tara Schmidt, a registered dietitian and host of on nutrition, a podcast for Mayo clinic, where we dig into the latest nutrition trends and research to help you understand what's health and what's hype. There's a lot of wild stuff out there, so we'll be keeping it science-based, research-informed, and practical. Mayo Clinic's On Nutrition.

New episodes every other week, wherever you get your podcasts. I think it costs that much to go to the top of the bird's- He's wearing a shirt. Golden Dome. Golden Dome. What about it? I wrote a note. Not that.

Dude, I thought the same thing. I wrote it down because you talked about info on the Golden Dome. I was like, I don't know what the fuck that is. I thought you were talking about your head. Yeah, some really good head. So, depends. Do you want me to go like missaltism light or missaltism heavy? Okay.

All right. So, the Golden Dome has been proposed by President Trump. He put it into action. And what it is, is it's a nationwide intercontinental ballistic missile defense for the United States. Now, the United States right now has a program of record that is currently in use it's called gmd ground-based mid-course defense they use these things called gbis ground-based interceptors by the way fun fact they travel at mach 33 yeah that's that's for you guys yeah that's the missile tism so those are fucking yeah they're cooking they're moving downside is they're 77 million dollars a piece and we only have 44 of them so right now we have a whole bunch of different sensors like when it

comes to the world of radars america makes better radars than everybody else in the fucking world like we have cobra dane radar which is i didn't even know where it was it's on the illusion islands in um alaska and it's a low frequency radar and it's been around since the 1970s. We use that one. We use this thing called SBX which is the sea-based X-band radar. We have one of them and it watches the Pacific. The whole thing.

At the same time. All of it. All of it. Just before we have to make some phone calls, this is all declassified. Yes, of course. I verified all this. Which means we have to make some phone calls, this is all declassified. Yes, of course. I verified all this. Which means we have cooler shit. Much cooler.

So then we have Aegis, the Aegis combat system with the, what is it? The Spy 1 and Spy 6 and Spy 7 from the United States Navy on board their Arleigh Burke-class destroyers and their Ticonderoga-class cruisers. And then we also have these things called LRDRs, Long Range Discrimination Radar. Oh, that's like us. Cody and Rich. Yeah, Cody, you and I do long range discrimination. That's only in underprivileged neighborhoods.

They also see everything. You're beat cops. That's short range. He's still got it because we were driving through Texas the other day and he was just like, minority! And then he locked the doors. And I was like, yeah, he's got it. What color are the silhouettes

that you guys shoot at in training? The color they should be. Black. Shit. What do we call them? I'm going to get a water. Anybody need anything? No, just stop eating i'm sorry i'm sorry you're on your tism right now i have never seen anyone bully bully people so well on twitter i thought i thought i was good at bullying people on twitter but when people

start talking about missiles and attacking the united states or attacking other countries you're like no honestly i learned from you so i i will say that i got twitter when brandon was running for office because you guys were in a knockdown drag out battle with with his opponent and uh i was like i just want to watch and then i watched you of all people i started seeing what cody was saying on twitter and i was like i could do that i could do that and now me and you are tag teaming iran it's my favorite past like honestly more than any social media i open on my phone twitter is number one i'm just like all right let's see whose day i can ruin let's just scroll through this it's my

favorite past time i love how they're parading around like the iranian military is like parading around cripples in formation they're just like we could fuck up the united states i'm just like dude you guys are the people that like are the tutorial of the game we actually want to play i i broke it down mathematically because i did a video uh usa versus it's my usa versus the world series and it was uh versus gaza and what i ended up doing for most of the video was talking about the history of gaza and israel and frankly the more i read the less i know who the fuck it belongs to i have no idea why everyone wants to kill each other for that chunk of land but uh you know like beautiful area yeah i guess but gaza is it could be i originally i was like let's just see if i can prove this mathematically how fast did the u.s take iraq okay we took it an

x amount of days was like 33 days how many square miles is iraq was like 7 000 square miles okay how far how big is gaza 141 square miles i was like okay let's do some math break this down 26 minutes by the way united states could take gaza in 26 minutes that was on my list of shit to look up i mean it's saying israel it's the whoppers will be ready be fair, in actuality, it's taken Israel a few thousand years. That's fair. Don't make those people mad, Brandon. I was going to say, I feel like those people is worse.

What are they going to do? Donate millions of dollars against this political campaign? God forbid. Like a pack of them? A pack of them? A super pack of them? A super pack of them? No. I don't know how much of that we can even keep.

What the hell is... I'm going to get another water that I'm not going to get. Just put black bars over Brandon's eyes. Redacted Brandon. Yeah, just pops up and then goes away. Punished Brandon. But jumping back to the golden dome so is it you know a lot of people ask me like is this is this realistic okay first of all you got to understand we're the united states of america anything we want to do is realistic like we just we do shit because we can we have a knife missile we have

just like crazy amounts of shit that the united states has built. And it's just like, why not? Like that's kind of the U.S. mentality. So is it going to be expensive? Yes. However, the goal is to build a network of sensors that all talk to each other. Now, sensors that talk to each other and say, hey, I see this here is an easy thing. The world has that. But sensors that say, hey, I'm looking at this thing.

I need you to fire your missile and guide it until it's within my radar fan. It's like we were talking about last time with the relay race of sensors and missiles. Imagine like you're a sniper and you have spotters all along your path. And every time you squeeze the trigger, your spotter, as it gets into their flight path, takes control of that round and guides it where it needs to go. It's the same principle. It's a really difficult concept. Is it possible? absolutely but then we get into like what is considered and this is the part of my job that i really hate it's kind of like playing god we do what's called a cvt assessment

criticality vulnerability and threat now is paw tuck its farm in fucking pencil tucky iowa important yes because we need sustenance for our forces however is it important as where we build bullets bombs ships things like that no it's not as important in the short term so we need to protect those assets more it's kind of like the fight club thing of like where they do the mathematics on you know uh is it more expensive to do a recall versus the lawsuits on the people they kill exactly exactly so the same thing with us is we we got somebody got it yeah like you build a whole plan based off of what is the highest priority target and it's the same thing that like israel does with the iron dome and arrow three is if your iranian missile which is hot dog shit and you know to begin with

is going to land in the middle of the desert, they're not even going to shoot at it. They're just going to laugh at you. Like when the USS, was it the Dwight D. Eisenhower? The Houthis fired at an American ship, and they missed by 100 miles. I know those guys. Yeah, they missed by 100 miles. Dear God. What did they fire that was that bad?

An AT-4? A dog? They just put a dog in a catapult and fucking sent it. It's so bad, man. Yeah. Why didn't you just fire the... Why didn't you just throw the explosives in the catapult? Funny.

We tried this thing very, very, very many times. But yeah, no. So is it possible? Yes. But we're going to have to prioritize the highest assets first before we prioritize the lower assets. It's going to be an overwhelming amount of sensors that network together. You're going to need a large amount of manpower to man these sensors.

And right now we're currently replacing our GBI's or ground-based interceptors with the NGI's next generation interceptors from Lockheed martin which are 111 million dollars a piece and rumor has it they also traveled at mach 33 so there's my my missile test rumor has firing like flying that fast that is cooking how fast is the what's the fast jet blackbird uh mach mach 3 mach 3 yeah mach 3 is the sr-71 yeah and that is built loosely because the heat then expands. Yeah, expands the titanium. But we don't have hypersonic missiles. I fucking hate that so much.

Based off of the logic of hypersonics, which is anything that travels over Mach 5. I don't like using Mach because Mach is speed. Audio or what is it? Sound travels different at different altitudes. So pretty much anything that travels over one mile per second. like audio or uh what is it sound travels different at different altitudes so pretty much anything that travels over one mile per second we've had hypersonics since 1946 with the v2 missile program which traveled at 1700 meters a second at its fastest altitude we did the people that we paper clipped away from the v2 anyway we just borrowed them like it's you know

hey you can go to prison or you can build some really cool rockets mach 33 is guess how many miles an hour uh 32 000 something like that 25 000 miles an hour well i mean the slam missile was just designed to stay up in the atmosphere permanently wasn't it yeah they uh so china actually has one like that it's uh their dfzf it's the df-17 and it's the hypersonic glide vehicle but it they fire it up and it just loiters in orbit as long as they need it to until they're ready to drop it down kind of like what we were talking about with the in the video that you cameoed on my channel with the uh the hot laps on the the e52 chrome dome oh that's a great one where it's just

like they just had a fucking aircraft in the air ready to nuke at any given moment and they were just doing hot laps well i don't know about the chinese one but the it was like the 1960s we came out with the slam yeah the slam i think it was also if i'm not mistaken it's been a little while since i read about the slam wasn't that also the one that they had nuclear propulsion with yes small nuclear the slam missile was a nuclear propelled missile that would go super high up and literally just do hot laps around the planet in perpetuity forever until they said oh land here and then it would just that's the sort of shit that makes me kind of okay with paying taxes yeah that's pretty cool it's well so here's the thing we when

you when you talk about hypersonics you run into what's called the rocket problem and this is this is my tism coming off right so the rocket problem is based off of physics how fast can you make that object going with the the thrust that it is producing but you also have to factor in wind resistance heat uh drag everything yeah so fuel um so like ballistic missiles nowadays they they yeah they travel at like mach 9 or something like that but that's when they're at apogee the phases of flight of a ballistic missile or launch boost apogee separation and terminal most systems engage in the terminal phase like thad terminal high altitude air defense and then patriot is in the terminal phase the only exception to this is GMD, which is in the

mid course. So that is usually right around Apogee. That's why it has to move at Mach 33. Cause it has to meet that target when it's moving that fucking fast. Like dude, missiles are so cool. Like for example, fad, right? Terminal high altitude air defense, which by the way, on paper is the most effective air defense system in existence. It has had four shots and four kills in American history. That is the only time THAAD has ever fired and has killed everything it's ever fired at. What was it fired at? Dogs. More dogs?

God damn, I ran. By the way, slam missile. Nickname for my penis. It's also a loitering munition waiting to be called upon. It turns out the THAAD was used exclusively by the AT the atf um so that has been fired at houthi missiles and iranian missiles but that is really cool and i'm saying this just because again i'm not that qualified but this is uh i was talking to one of my students and they were kind of explaining this to me unclassed

all my classes on class i love it you're explaining you're like i'm not qualified on it i'm like homie none of us knew this existed yeah that's fair but that is the epitome of but first let me take a selfie right so this is the way it works it's a two-stage missile takes off like and like a bat out of fucking hell right like moving weight makes patriot look like a slow goat if that makes sense to everybody flies past it separates separates then the warhead takes a picture of the object it's supposed to intercept it then sends that picture back to the radar which then does an infrared like or like digital overlay and says yep that's the target and it sends it directly to chat gpt they do a studio ghibli of the target and then it intersects do they then make it one of those

action figures oh god that action figure tells me i need to go to the gym but what does miss number five look like yeah right but uh yeah it overlays the picture and then boom it just smokes it sends sends it right for it sends the warhead right for it which is i i think is one of the coolest interceptors that we have like we have a lot of interceptors out there that's one of the coolest also terrifying we have that tech and we just don't use it that much with you explaining uh the what the the gold dome is supposed to be i'm just kind of surprised that we don't have something like that already so right now that we know about so gmd is is again the program of record we just it's a limited system

now when people like so we have 40 missiles in california and four of them in alaska and that sounds like a lot of missiles until you realize they send between two to five interceptors at every single target to get that high probability of kill so you run through that really quick fast and in a hurry We need a lot of interceptors, but you also need qualified people who are able to fire those interceptors, which is the problem we run into like air defense right now, our retention rate, like maintaining people in the air defense branch is really difficult because we just run a ragged because every co-com commander out there thinks air defense is an infinite resource. Well, we'll just put Patriot there.

We'll just put that there. And these guys are guys are like you know 12 months out nine or 12 months back and then 12 months out like they're constantly fucking deploying we have we never slowed down when g1 ended air defense never slowed down we're run ragged right now but there is a big push to expand our branch exponentially like it's finally it's really good because the powers that be i don't know if it's i don't know if it's finally, it's really good because the powers that be, I don't know if it's, I don't know if it's the Pentagon. I don't know where it is, but they're like, we need air defenders. And they have been pushing people through. Now we don't have enough instructors. We have people at the AIT, Advanced Individual Training Schoolhouse, and they're having to

wait there for nine to 12 months before they can even enter class because class is completely Well, now you're making me feel bad about getting you to quit. I know. I'm like, this is a perfect time for you to just do the jake gyllenhaal bounce out but it's i mean it's it's such a cool like program like we can absolutely do it so i worked okay i gotta be very careful here and then and thread some line i worked on a program called ibcs which is the integrated air missile defense battle command system i think that's what eli has yeah i can't have milk yeah no cheese no milk no dairy yeah um and that system is any shooter any sensor so like it passes interceptors in real time so i it was probably the highlight of my career been all downhill since there um 2019 um and this is all in class you can look it

up ibcs flight test 5 you can see it on youtube it's all there um i engaged two missiles that were flying a cruise missile profile low and fast they were maneuvering well i couldn't see them with my sensor but i had other sensors networked in with me so i fired circumstantially and nothing and in the middle of the engagement f-35s grabbed my birds and sent them into the targets which is terrifying you can use surface-to-air missiles with f-35 air picture oh so the pilots drove them to where they needed to be that's fucking cool yeah that's what they're doing with the new f-15 ex oh yeah the ex yeah that's the whole strategy is they just took the f-15s

and made them be able to carry way more ammo like way more missiles they're basically a fucking missile truck and the f-35 so it's like an f-35 and four f-15s and the f-35 is like the mother ship 10 000 feet above the f-15s using its sensor and it's just sending the targeting data directly to the f-15s so you turn them into merc stuff a 200 million dollar wi-fi router that's pretty literally like it's like a it's like a mothership in an alien f-35 is like a computer with wings it is the smartest thing that has ever flown and its sensor is like its radar is beast and it was cool as shit like after i did the shot which was i'm so glad we hit our targets i was worried but i'm so glad it was it was a preliminary test and then afterwards the pilots were like radio down to us they're like you guys want to see us do some maneuvers look if i ever

say no to that just go ahead and chop my dick off man like do i want to see f-35s do backflips and barrel rolls over top of me absolutely i do but you had good effect on target the wedding never saw it yeah that wedding party in a rectangle out there in the desert hey brandon you ever wake up in your bed feeling like you just fought in the war Yeah, what do you ask? Yeah, I believe that's called night sweats. Means you got a trash mattress, Brandon. Why are we talking like Macho Man Randy Savage? Because today we're talking about our premier sponsorship, GhostBed.com.

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I'll show up under your bed and make ghost noises until you do. Go now. I just want to reiterate, none of this was in the script. I don't know why we started talking like random stuff. So I have a question that I'm, A, not sure if you can answer, and B, I'm not sure I want to know the answer. Okay. You're talking about those things,

they're being the most intelligent things that have ever flown, and they've got all this data and everything. To what degree is the DOD interfacing AI into stuff like that? So I don't know fully because the, the, the DOD compartmentalizes information really well, but I will tell you it was brought up to me on a project that I worked on

and myself and several, several other NCOs who are really competent. What we did is we gave the AI a moral dilemma. So when I was talking about the CVT assessment, criticality, vulnerability, and threat, we prioritize the threats one through eight. Don't do it, Rich. I don't even know what you're going to say.

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One fire and forget, Richard. Just go on. You're doing a good job. Oh, God. I am proud of you. You haven't embarrassed me yet. You're doing a good job. Oh, God. I'm proud of you. You haven't embarrassed me yet. You've done great. So I'm not going to fuck you up because you're doing a good job.

Okay. All right. I'm sitting back and letting you shine. Thank you. Don't make it weird. All right. So we prioritize the targets one through eight. And then I think it was like target three or four.

We just bombarded with missiles. We threw everything at it now the logical response is to reserve your missiles on those higher priority assets because they are a higher priority the moral answer is to hey how about we protect these things equally and if priority one isn't getting fucking smoked we we send the resources to priority four so it's separate but equal you couldn't you couldn't resist i got to keep it in we gotta segregate them i get it um so the system the ai prioritized it as a lower priority and uh didn't it did the logical thing instead of the moral thing and that's why we were like look was that a pass or a fail uh that was a fail okay um so our like for us what we ended up like the agreement that we kind of came to and this is not under nda this was just like a separate thing

um we came to the agreement that ai can augment operators but ai cannot make lethal decisions on behalf of operators so that's where we. Like, if it can give me information faster and at the right speed so I know what I'm looking for, I'm all for it. But it should never be able to pull the trigger. It's like Brandon driving, like, the car is driving, he just kind of has one hand on the steering wheel.

Oh yeah, the full self-driving that is basically like, if I close my eyes, it yells at you kind of shit if i'm texting it yells at you yep dude i was in uh it says it doesn't see your face it's like you're not making maintaining eye contact with the road it's crazy how good it is at that do we the the fucking the thing the white house released the other day the hoothies gathering in the circle so rumor has it and this is through the rumor mill, I have no way to confirm this, but that that was a JASM.

And I think that was the first time JASM. JASM is the joint... What is it? JISM. JISM missile. JISM. I had a massive JASM this morning. Joint something, or joint airborne standoff strike missile, I think.

I'm shooting in the dark there. I'm sure somebody will correct me if I get it wrong. So were they, but it seemed to land. Did you see afterwards? It should look like the moon like it was perfect be like do you see that one yeah yeah i just saw the president tweeted it that's how i was i was like oh they're just tweeting this now that is bro but the president of the united states is tweeting snuff films. But that's fucking wild. I'm here for it. The shit on LiveLeak we used to watch.

The president's like, look at this shit, yo. But I've seen a lot of Predator feeds. I've never seen one that clear. Like, have you ever seen one that clear? I've never seen one that clear. Dude, tech is getting insane. Like, that was 4K, wide angle, 120 frames. Like, that was beautiful.

We're getting close to the fucking slow-mo replay. It's so good, man. We're taking sponsors. An orgy has them. Steak is underneath it. There's a line like, steak patting. This killing of 18 Houthis

brought to you by Buffalo Wild Wings. There was a whole lot more than 18 there, man. I think afterwards, like you see all their bodies just blown out. I'm sorry. That's fucked up. I shouldn't like make fun of that. Yes. That's the worst thing that's been said on this podcast.

Like I'm a reasonable person, but I don't like, I'm, I'm not one of those. Like I want to negotiate with terrorists. We should talk with terrorists. Like you should be eradicated. Like you're either a terrorist or a terrorist sympathizer. You should give us the information. We'll pay you handsomely like when you when i was in afghanistan and someone gave us intel like hey the taliban are here this is where their stuff is blah blah blah you got paid like bank like ten thousand dollars a pop for good intel so you're either a capitalist or you're a sympathizer

i'm sorry for bumfuck afghanistan it's like you're a king oh yeah it's uh 47 to 1 when i was there was the turnover rate so that's what 470 000 or 4.7 million i don't i don't math in public you quite fine yeah yeah i mean that's just one piece of intel like you can leave afghanistan after that like i live like a king i I'm out. Unless we forget about you. I'm trying to think. You know the story. I'm not sure what you're allowed to talk about. I was going to

talk about that. That was one of the things I was going to bring up. What? I'm lost. I don't know how much of that you can say but well the investigation's over oh so we're good yeah ready to go fucking all right why buckle up buttercup this is the one i was gonna i was told you about okay i haven't heard this one for a couple days um i have a body. I did an investigation on a guy for sleeping with a 12-year-old, and he unsubscribed.

Wait, is this stateside, or are we talking about, like... Stateside. Okay. He unsub... Like, this happened last week. He unsubscribed from life. From life. Because I stuck on an investigation that I could have stopped because it was going nowhere. But because I had time and it wasn't really like setting me back, I kept the investigation alive. And most importantly, because he was guilty.

Well, I knew that if I could just get a certain piece of evidence, then it would lead me to him. It was just a waiting game. Yeah. And I'm not saying that there's like, I'm not shitting on anybody. Like, I'm just saying that I decided that I was going to keep going on this case where I could have let it slide because I was hitting brick walls. I was telling it for the audience sake that you didn't just that you're like, yeah made this guy like you knew he fucking done that oh he admitted to me i'll tell i'll tell the full story but he he fucking he chose to unsubscribe so probably lead with what brandon's for your career yeah once you realize like this guy's a fucking it's like oh all of a sudden i

care a lot less about his side it was it was It was a muscle, like, instinctive reaction on his part. Oh, you guys bully people off the internet. Wait till you see what I did. So this guy cut me off. I will never top that on Twitter. I just want you to know, I will never top that. So I'll try to make this short and sweet and give you the information that I think I'm allowed to give. Because, once again, the investigation's over.

But I was I got called to the hospital where a 12-year-old was This person went on the internet on a dating site and then met up with somebody on the dating site who was an older person. So the 12-year-old was on a dating site?

12-year-old was on a dating site. You'd be surprised how often that happens. Dude, the internet is a fucking scary place for fucking underage kids the amount of like blackmail that young men get because they'll send a dick pic to somebody that they met on instagram like i'm talking like 10 12 14 16 you know kids that are just like you know turning going into puberty and then they take that photo and then send them like a template that says, we will show your Instagram handle and your face and your dick that you sent us unless you give us money. Like there are tons of teenagers that fall for that trap. Yeah, my sister works with that shit all the time because she's child crimes unit.

So same. So like this kid has a hard life and because of that hard life made some bad decisions. Regardless, she's, you look it's not like, oh, what a well-developed teenager. You're a young lady. Oh, she looks like she's eight. No, no, no. She's a fucking 12-year-old. I don't want to give a physical description because I think that's too far, but she's an obvious 12-year-old.

Like prepubescent. Yeah. Like, goofy-looking hair and face and awkward shit. You know, if this person walked into the house, he'd be like, 12. Do you want to play? Are you here for Pokemon? You know, that's the wrong person to ask because not like the 17 year old, a fake ID. Like it's straight up very obvious.

Not an icon situation. And do this dating app. They were very helpful, but it was, um, you want to go down a conspiracy thing? It was like borderline satanic it was like devil horns and everything and all about kinks and all fucked up it was very weird anyway so she gets on the dating app she meets this older guy which which happens more often than you think uh he picks her up brings her home they do the deed drops her off back home with with Uber. There you go. Tracking it now. Mistake one, motherfucker. So I'm

unfortunately and I don't want to give away too much but there was another investigation with this poor kid. I think that one's done but if it's not either way

the kid was a mess. And it made the investigation very difficult. And we were like, I was specifically. Just cooperation-wise or like what? I can't say. I can just say the kid was in rough shape because of what happened. And so that stonewalled my investigation and I was kind of like stuck. So eventually what I was able to do, and I'm working with the district attorney's office, which were phenomenal,

is I was able to get a warrant for Uber. And so Uber gave me the guy's email address, phone number, his name. And I was able to backtrack that, figure out if he had a registered vehicle, if he had a driver's license, which state, what were the addresses. And I had several addresses. And then before I went home that day, I just jumped in my truck and started driving around and going to these different locations to see if I could find his shit. And I found his car. And I was like, there's this fucking car.

And I see it and it's parked in apartment number so and so spot and I'm like oh that matches with something else that I have so I get another detective with me and I think it was the following day I'm like hey I gotta interview this guy it's called a non custodial interview which means if you're not

in custody what don't you have to read Cody your Miranda rights you don't have to read them they're miranda rights so people are the law school i was like yeah yeah i was shooting in the dark i was thinking the same thing yeah i get so turned on it's not immigration law i'll ask you i get so turned on when you're talking about being a cop actually doing police work real police work to help people. It's super cool. Even when I was going after gangs

and guns, the ATF guys that were with me were going after bad guys. The ATF division in Buffalo is phenomenal. Some of those guys really do good work. Tell us about the ATF, Brandon. Not to take the side of the ATF on fucking literally anything, but there are legitimate roles that they play. There's door kickers in there that go after gang members and aren't like

trying to screw businesses over because they put a one instead of a zero at the end of a uh form arson investigations things where there's like a real victim it's like well yeah there's like real real shit there but like yeah no but there are also plenty of paper pushers that just want to like take out mom and pop businesses. Make their careers fucking... Yeah, bureaucrats. Did the arm brace touch? The arm brace touched. I'll put you in prison.

Yeah, now my career is going to advance. So speaking of bad touch... Oh, God. So I interview... Why? I love it. I'll f*** myself if I don't make jokes about it. So take that YouTube. So, uh, my buddy and I interviewed

the guy and it's, it's always like a game to me to be like, to like try and get them. Even if like, that's how I kind of stay sane is if a kid gets touched or there's the potential of a kid getting touched, we do interviews to see whether or not the kid makes, um, some sort of statement that something happened. And if they don't, then I'm like, sweet, then nothing happened. False alarm. Nobody's upset. That's great. But if a kid is and he gives like a statement that something happened, I'm like, fuck, yeah, we're going to get this dude.

So it's like it's a weird way to say win-win, you know, but it's a way that I'm like, all right, I've got to focus to try and get this bad guy. Right. Anywho, we talked to dude. We're like, hey, buddy, let's get out here let's talk a little bit about some stuff yeah you're his friend right now i'm his aeon i went through i want honestly i want to get this guy um on your podcast not my place to put guys on your podcast but he's absolutely brilliant and he came in and taught our entire detective division how to do interviews over the past year and he's an old mi5 guy and did

undercover work in the ira and was busting like bomb placers in the ira and i'd love to get him on here dude a hundred percent dude he's super interesting and all he does is teach how to interview now and when i tell you he'll get you to talk just by guiding you guiding you and listening he creeped me out when we were in class. Holy shit, did he scare the shit out of me? Anyway, so I'm using these different... I don't think I want him on the podcast, though. He's got some stories. He's very... And now we're in

Brandon's crying. We get to some shit on the podcast. I didn't think I wanted to say that. He comes on the podcast and just slowly puts a Burger King crown on his head. Oh, no, I was saying get him and Christian Craghead on. Oh, on oh that would be very fun i was like you shouldn't meet him because they were i bet you that they were they know they have the same friends yeah i bet you they have the same friends fucking wild so i interview this guy and

part of the interview techniques are like you be honest with them with what you can if you lie to them that doesn't really help and it also doesn't really make them with what you can if you lie to them that doesn't really help and it also doesn't really make you look good you can absolutely do it there's nothing wrong with it but one of the ways that you tell the truth is i go hey man i'm investigating this woman for and i'm investing this woman and her relationships that she had with people potentially online but any of our relationships which is true but also key where there's i'm saying woman not child right and no miranda writes because he can leave at any time it's non-custodial a non-custodial interview and i he admits that he has sex with

her i show him a photo he's like yep yeah that's her she's a different she's a different name but yeah that's her i'm like sweet what is his incentive to be doing this right like out of like why is he being so open because he's helping me investigate her what is she what is she under himself what's she under investigation for as far as like can't talk about that i can only tell you that i'm investigating her and the relationships that she's been having with other men well so he just openly admitted to a minor people want to help he didn't know well he knew he knew you what's amazing is a lot of want to talk i don't know why so if you want to get it off their chest they want to say the quiet thing out loud i don't

know why but a lot of them want to talk they want to show it's a show of power it's like mr swirly face i think we might have touched base on that the the photoshop guy the the swirl that was like uh like a serial yeah serial and then they unswirled it to find like five years of investigation fbi was like wait what happens if we reverse swirl his face just came perfectly into picture it was like oh that's the guy so were So were you doing the Django Unchained thing where you don't go there to buy the Mandingo? No, no, seriously, seriously. I go there to buy the... No, yeah, you're not going there to fucking buy his wife.

You're going there to buy the biggest Mandingo. So you're talking about the woman, this, this, and this. I'm talking about the Mandingo. And they're going to reveal the wife, Django's wife on the side. That's an investigatory thing. Does Buffalo PD have a wood chipper? Not necessarily. Fuck her. We're not on the job.

So you didn't go there to buy the farm. You went there to buy the cow. That's right. But I was talking about the farm. So I'm talking about the thing that I'm investigating. But I'm not lying to him when I'm saying that it's not him. Yeah, I'm not really investigating you that I'm investigating, right? But I'm not lying to him when I'm saying that it's not him. Yeah, I'm not really investigating you. I'm investigating the relationship, which is absolutely true.

I don't give a shit about you. I give a shit about what the relationship was between you and her, right? So it's the truth. And he makes these admissions. And then he made what I think is probably – I'll just say what he said. A life-ending mistake maybe? I'll just say what he said and then you can say what you feel about it. He said like, yeah, we – all right.

Well, we didn't really have sex. We had sexual relations. And I'm like, okay, what's that mean? And he goes, well, I received oral sex from her. And I go, okay, with a condom? And he's like,'s like yeah with a condom you get a blow job with a condom yeah has anybody ever done that not with a hooker like the second i heard him like and i looked at my partner and we both had like this moment we're're like, well, that's more shit. You had a blowjob with a condom on? Okay. All right.

Whatever. Apparently I am far darker than you guys because that's exactly where my head went and nobody here is like, oh yeah, that's bullshit. Anyway. I was with you. That sounds like the laziest attempt to

reel back what he said. And it's exactly what he did. Sav really loves latex. We do it all the time. The flavor of Trojan rimmed. Nothing like chewing on a bubblegum wrapper for 10 minutes. That's great. It's like sucking on a balloon animal. Basically.

The most disappointing balloon animal. Like sucking on the tread on the side of the road that's supposed to wake you up if you fall asleep. So we leave. We leave him from questioning. Glad you enjoyed that, Nick. Oh! You pull back fast. It's like a little ripcord.

It's like ripping a Beyblade. This is really funny in any other context. Hey, Brandon. Yes, Eli? When you think of businesses that are just crushing it, bonker, onset, what's the first thing to enter your mind? That's easy, Eli. A good child labor law attorney.

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All lowercase. Yeah, sorry to bring it down. Don't worry. The end, the end. The payoff. Well, there's a funny spot after the end. Really? So we leave, we go back,

and just like anything, when you get an admission to Guild, you're like, fuck, yeah, this is awesome. And so we go back, I talk with the ADA, and we decide, sweet, we're not going to ask him any more questions. He's said enough. He's already trying to back out of stuff. Let's get a search warrant for his phone. We'll get in his phone and see what's in his phone.

So there's two types of search warrants that you need to get in somebody's phone. One, you need a search warrant to collect the evidence to grab the phone. They need a search warrant to get in the phone, right, if they don't give you permission. Jailbreaking or whatever you want to call it, busting into an iPhone takes a long time, weeks, right? So, what you want to do is you want to get them to sign a permission to search. Even, doesn't matter when, as long as he gives you the code and says you can look in it, that's going to make it so much faster. So I'm like, sweet.

I call him up. I'm like, hey, dude, why don't you come over? I want to, you know, I got to talk to you for a second. Stop by. He's like, okay. So he comes over and my buddy is, my buddy, whose nickname, he's six foot four and over three, he's like over 350. He's just, he's slim'4 and over 3, he's like over 350. He's slimmed down from over 400 pounds. His nickname is the Slim Reaper.

He's massive, but his nickname is the Slim Reaper because he's had three guys close the investigation for him. I've said this before, we call it a baptized in the Niagara River. He's had two a baptized in the Niagara River.

He's had two guys walk into the Niagara River during December and just drown themselves because he was like, hey, what's going on? You touched a kid. I'm the investigator. And they were like, sweet. Which took a dip.

My hero. Not that I have much sympathy for those people, but that is, we were talking about this a little yesterday that is a wild way to f*** yourself drowning is to intentionally drown yourself in a f***ing river

that's crazy rough too it took a police officer one of our divers he his safety line got cut we don't know what happened but his safety line got cut and he drowned years ago yeah good guy too this guy you know totally off the topic of that that that diver and i mean that's awful that it happened but you know the fact that two people have done this in the niagara river this guy

deserves like a medal from the fucking buffalo what are the odds he's doing it what's that what are the odds that slim slim's tossing. He's dextring people. It's a public service. He does have the tism. So he could dexter the shit out of these people and be like, that's what happened. I'll just say, and tell me if that's too far to say as a joke. He just chucks them in at 350, slimmed down 350 pounds. Not right. Well, the one guy didn't. So, I mean, at least that guy might not have 350 pounds. Not right.

Well, the one guy didn't. So, I mean, at least that guy might not have been him. Jesus Christ. You know, like, how do you say, like, oh, he walked in or he was politely tossed in. You know, who knows? Politely tossed. Respectfully. Sir, I apologize for this. They politely fucking drowned.

He doesn't have to throw him in. He's just like, get in. Get in. Jump. just like, get in. Get in. Jump. So that comes in. That's some true detective shit right there. It's like the accountant where he's just like, you know, hey, we could do some awful shit to you and your wife. Or you could just take all that insulin.

Yep. Anyways, your friend's rad. So my friend's awesome. He great and eventually he's gonna go to homicide very soon i hope he's still i hope love you bitty and uh so he's down there with me talking to this guy as he comes in and i'm about to take his phone and this guy's talking circles like hey bud listen i'd like to know if you'd give me your phone so i can look through it oh do i need a lawyer hey you can have whatever you want, man. I'm just asking you, would you like to freely give up your phone?

Because I want that permission to search. Yeah. I want to make it easier for the investigation. 20 minutes of it. And like my buddy's like looking at me like, dude, fucking just give him the warrant. I'm over this. And I'm like, all right. Will you give me your phone?

Yes or no? Will you give me your phone? Yes or no? Here's a search warrant. Oh, you're going to take my phone anyway? Yes. Can I look through your phone? Yes or no? Oh, will you give me your phone? Yes or no? Here's a search warrant. Oh, you're going to take my phone anyway? Yes. Can I look through my phone? No.

I gave you the search warrant. That phone is mine now, even though it's in your hands. Give me the phone. He's like, okay. And he goes, well, I still want to show that I'm helping out the investigation. I was like, sign this permission to search. Give me your passcode and let me go in the phone. And he's like, and this is when I was like, there's something on the phone.

He goes, so what are you going to look at? What do you look at? I'm like, well, we download your entire phone and we look at your entire phone. We were like, what do you mean look at my entire phone? I go, everything. I look at your entire phone. He goes, what do you take off of it? There's personal information on there. I go, listen, I'm going to look at your

entire phone, everything in it. And if you've got, if you get a dick pic with your girlfriend, or there's a sex video with you and enough, like somebody that's what I don't care if it has to do with the case, we'll keep it. If it doesn't, we won't, but I'm going to look in your entire phone. And he's like, okay. So he signs the permission to search. And then I go upstairs and I turn in the phone and I start writing my notes for the case. And then the next day I'm notified homicide is at my guy's apartment. And I'm like,

why is homicide? I know why I know why, but why it's homicide at my guy's apartment. And I fucking call up the homicide detective that's there. And I'm like, hey, dude, what's up? And he's like, hey, do you know so-and-so? I go, yep. He's like, well, he's dead.

And I'm like, really? What happened? He goes, well, he wrote a letter and he sent a text message for somebody who's come to my house and check me out. I'll see you later. And he's gone. They did not, in fact, see him later. Well, they did, just not alive. Now, was it an easy death

for himself? I can't tell. I don't feel like I can say how he did it. We can cut this part and then we can give reactions. We'll cut this part out. We can give reactions. He... Whoa! And then...

Now, I assume that he missed the first time he whoa and then and and now I assume that he missed the first time because this is just this is assumption

I don't know for a fact but there's there's two there's two points I don't want to because I'm trying to I'm trying to make sure that I can say the story

without having all this deleted shit I mean on the plus side at least he cooperated with the investigation enough to find out. You can keep that part in there. Open and shut case, boys. That's a recording.

He did the ultimate cooperation. I don't want to cost the taxpayers any money. Literally, the investigation's over. And you're like, oh, case closed. Yep. He became a member of Doge for three minutes. That's how you cut government spending. You really cut government spending.

So. Oh, man. The story ends. I saved the taxpayers a lot of money. My face hurts. I've been smiling so much. The reaction to how it happened. You're just like, what?

What's funny is that people are going to take little sections of this out of context, but we're just over here laughing over the death of a fucking bitch. We need a morbid R-rated version of Scooby-Doo with Rich. Oh my god. Scooby-Dooby-Doo. Who the fuck do you need to get their own mask off?

Oh my god. It's Rich. There are very few things that you can be certain of Doobie doobie doo. Who f***ed you? Oh my god. There are very few things that you can be certain of in life. But you can always be sure the sun will rise each morning. You can bet your bottom dollar that you'll always need air to breathe and water to drink. And, of course, you can rest assured that with Public Mobile's 5G subscription phone plans, you'll pay the same thing every month. With all of the mysteries that life has to offer, a few certainties can really go a long way. Subscribe today for the peace of mind you've been searching for.

Public Mobile. Different is calling. You've got some holes to fill. Oh, my God. Everything was going good until Rich showed up. It was old man jenkins again so i'm glad yeah so it caught me off guard so the day i was actually kind of fucked up because i like i talked this guy i met with him like my investigation his actions led to his death but my investigations you know push him over the edge so it's kind of up for a day or two because i met

him i talked to him. He's like, there was a relationship, even though he was the suspect to fuck me up for a day or two. Did you, did you like hand hurt from all the high fives you got from like other detectives or anything? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No, no, no, no, no.

That was fine. That was fine. No, I'm saying, I'm saying, so remember how I said that my friend got a nickname, the slim Reaper, because three guys took themselves out? Which is yours. I now have an unofficial nickname, and it's called the Influencer. The Influencer! And then you all see CNN throwing up a fucking rainbow

which I want you to know I changed your name in my phone to that after the intro I need to change mine now it used to be rich angry cops no it's rich the influencer so my somebody

told me quote unquote the influencer like and subscribe. And then I said more like unsubscribe from life. Hey, that's the name of the movie.

That's the name of the movie. So my unofficial nickname that I've gotten now because the first person that's off themselves because of my investigation is now the influencer oh my guys which i i'm not gonna lie like it's morbid i laughed for 30 minutes i was just like holy shit this sounds like an a24 movie oh it's the same thing that happened in True Detective. Remember that scene with Matthew McConaughey where he says,

you should just **** yourself. At the first opportunity where you have, you should **** yourself. Just like there's no break. At the first opportunity you get, you should **** yourself. It's like The Happening except instead of nothing, it's just Rich following you around and telling you to **** yourself. The Richening. It's just Rich following you around and telling you to leave. The Richening. It's just Rich following you. It follows.

It's just Rich walking through. It's the Hypening. The thumbnail right there. He's in your backyard just staring at you. Just like tying the noose over you. Holding your phone. Oh yeah we so we've got to go through his phone so like right he's got a permission search it's still good he's dead like it's our property is there any reason to do that at this point yes because the other victims so one well there you

go so the main reason of the investigation is to discover if there's any information regarding my investigation. Now, I have a legal warrant to look into his phone, regard anything that revolves around my investigation. With that legal warrant and in the process of looking for information for my investigation, if there's additional information that's damning or evidence, et cetera, that can be used to open up another investigation or assist in something else and potentially find other victims. I know this is probably an attorney question, but I'm genuinely curious now.

Let's say that you have suspicion. Let's say you don't have a letter of consent, signed consent to search his phone, but you do have a warrant on his phone. Not to access it, but let's say you get... To collect it. Yeah. If you have a suspicion that maybe he's victimized other minors, say you get to collect it yeah if you have a suspicion that like maybe he's victimized

other minors are you allowed to even though he's dead now does that allow you to search his phone so i i think i know what you're saying and i'll try to answer it very poorly but yeah you're pretty dumb uh so it's like you can't help it you're more more tan than us. And so I made a comment earlier today that he is beautiful. He's not Puerto Rican. A beautiful bronze skin. The thing is, I think maybe I want to make sure that I get what you said right. So you're saying, hey, Rich, your investigation's over. Can you go through his phone to look for something that's not your investigation?

Yes. No. Because I, when you say suspicion, there's like legal terms, like reasonable suspicion. That reasonable suspicion has to have a foundation of like facts, statements. One might call it probable cause. Well, the probable cause is for an arrest. Reasonable suspicion is for me to stop, frisk, and to write a warrant, right? Probable cause is an arrest.

But probable cause can also be that's such a high standard that would be enough for a warrant as well. So in this specific investigation, I would be – I'm looking into his phone because of my investigation. Even though he's deceased, it's not over because I'm looking for more information regarding the assault that I am already looking into. So I'm in his phone, already in there. If additional information comes along, that's going to create other spider webs, which is a good way to get into a phone for other stuff. However, let's say that you're not really getting a warrant for a phone if you don't have information on what might be inside of it already. So your answer would be no, because if I don't have the right reasonable suspicion, meaning like statements or other evidentiary facts that I can use and state to a judge of why I need to get into his phone, you're not going to get the warrant to get it.

Slightly more gray area thing then, I guess. Lawyer Jake, yeah. Yeah, Lawyer Jake Poppin. I forgot. Fruit of the poisonous tree doctor. Yeah, correct. So if I just say, if the warrant is bad for his phone, I'll give you a bad warrant example. I go to a judge and I go,

I think this guy's touching kids. Why me? Huh? Why me? You just look like one. No, I'm sorry. He's on the same team today. Yeah, no, you can take a joke.

Rich just realized you dressed like me today, so he had to switch it up. That's fair. Listen, the people love it when I pick on you. I gotta give them what they want. I'm telling you. On this episode of HLC Unsubscribed. Fuck, man. They call me the influencer. Missiltism versus influencer.

You like missiles, huh? Phallic-shaped objects? Just the fast ones. But you like telling kids those stories too don't you you sick creek jesus christ maybe you should with a missile bleep that out please no that's okay you're fine i'm just letting them know don't run with scissors yeah you can say all you want about it that's fine but if you say something where i'm like i'll let you know here here's another thing though like if if you you've had suspicion that he was victimizing other minors, would they even still pursue that now that he's dead? Yes.

So what's the purpose, I guess? Kids help. Closure. Kids help and then expand into that criminal, like, hey, where'd they get this information? Like, just the data side of it. Like, how did this happen? Because if you hurt one kid, you obviously hurt other children. Yeah, that's what they're

chasing. I guess I just never considered it where if they figured out like, all right, well, the perpetrator is dead. Do we still pursue? Absolutely, dude. If they hurt one kid, they've hurt multiple other kids. You pursue that. Good people would want to help out the potential victims, Brandon.

Not let them strand and tread water with their horrible ptsd which we all have at this table because we've all served you never want to just make a power vacuum and leave that's how the taliban take control and i said twice yeah twice i don't know i'd be you could probably biden in your time for that. You say we can't just pick up and leave? Yeah. So yeah. Rich is just like the

lawn sprinkler flamethrower right now. So yeah, I got a body on me now. Feel different. Are you getting a teardrop tattooed? Dude, I thought about it. You should.

I'm not going to lie. There are... I can't say it on this one. There are ways that some people remember days where situations took place. And sometimes you remember those days with tattoos for different meetings with numbers and stuff. Put all the wood chippers on your left ass cheek, me. Right? There we go.

There we go. Do I get a wood chipper? But on the wood chipper, there's like a little one scrawled on it. And then in three years, you see like there's seven tally marks on the side. And the end of it. Just buy a wood chipper and just carve an obvious one. Dude, you got a conus kill.

That's what I'm saying. I kind of have a conus kill. That's what I said. I got a body. I kind of have a body. You take that deal? I take that deal. That's.5 of a body. If you round that up in math,

I passed when I was in 5th grade. The only year I passed. That's.5 of a body And if you round that up in math Like I passed when I was in 5th grade The only year I passed That's one You ever kill anybody? I don't like to talk about it So there was a Rich, I mean this from the bottom of my heart No, look me in the eyes Thank you for your service

You're welcome Thanks buddy Just remember, be nice to me He'll influence you motherfucker ran upstairs and i'm afraid when he when the person said your nickname is the influencer i was like oh that's cool it's pretty funny that's kind of you know about this story yeah yeah so actually i talked to taylor about it because i I was fucked up for like a day or two. I told you just briefly I was fucked up from it.

Because like I said, you build a relationship. And even though they're bad guys, you want them to go to jail. This is going to sound really fucked up. I knew I was afraid by the way you sprinted upstairs. Forgot I had something in my luggage. For who? Oh, that's me. On your feet! No. No.

Oh! Oh, come on! Wait, no, wait, no! I have the official memorandum from the Department of the Army. On your feet, damn it. For Commander, United States Army Civil Affairs Psychological Operations Command, Airborne, Fort Bragg, North Carolina. K-pop? You're one of me!

Subject, the acceptance and wear of former foreign badges. Under provisions of AR 600 dash 8 dash 22 appendix D section 7342 title 5 U.S. Code, the following individuals authorized to wear

the Latvian Parachutist badge. Us! There we go. We we pin this bad boy on? Can we read the name? That's ridiculous. It is... Jesus Christ. Bro. On three gentlemen, one, two, three. How'd that go? Dear God.

Brandon's like, oh, it's not over yet. How does this fucking happen? When you're a hero, hero Brandon people do things for you you're an American fucking hero that's a full on I feel like I'm smuggling stolen valor from my PO box to you you're my forced valor dealer I think technically

this is the authorization for the individual that gave it to you to wear it oh okay this is the memorand the individual that gave it to you to wear it. Okay. This is the memorandum that he got. Jesus Christ. Speaking of weird awards and shit, you guys know I did an Angry Meme review about

him. You know Throck, the destroyer, the big SF guy that was running with Pete Hegseth? Oh, yeah. I know who he is. The big boy, yeah. I know who he is. The big boy? Yeah, I know who he is. And I don't want to throw the guy under the bus, but I went overseas with a buddy, a great guy,

and now he's got stars on his collar. He's very nice. Wait, that guy has stars? No, no, no. My friend has stars. And I was like, hey, Hegseth was where you're at Around there somewhat that area Do you know anybody That could get me in touch with this dude and he's just like Yeah hold on I'll figure it out

And he figured it out and then he gave me I think his Commander's email or his email And I'm trying to get him a POB He is not happy That he made it Like all over the fucking United States Because of yeah because he's like an sf commander he's like he's a jesus yeah he's like a fucking lieutenant colonel in the special

forces he likes to be no one sees his face he's like he's the silent professional like legitimately and i was like hey i'm reaching out because i used another channel to try and get to him and be like hey bro i want to send you a thing he's like hey we talked to him he like he wants to lay low he doesn't want to know he wants doesn't want anything i'm like no i'm not gonna make a story about i want to give him a nana boy and he was like nah sorry man he's radio silent i was like fuck you i'm gonna get some stars involved and then i called my buddy and i was like give me this mother and i'm gonna send him a goddamn gift so sir respectfully i'm gonna get you some shit you're gonna get it from my email like i don't understand like mentality wise like why could you not lean into that so i i made a series of tweets

because he's a silent professional he's not a seal that has to make a book about it i get it or lose his eye i totally get it but like if you're if you're accidentally thrust into the spotlight so i made a series of tweets referring to him as the tactical kool-aid man because like dude could just go straight through the fucking unit yeah he's a fucking monster and i'm like why would you not play into that like i they i think they took his picture and were like tougher people are hard to kill like that was the whole big army's thing was he the one in the commercial where he says harder to kill no that was not i don't know it's a different different refrigerator yeah it's just like dude why not lean into that like obviously you're

you're fucking the top like right you are the absolute like top of your field you're special forces in a unit commander i got it you want to be quite professional but if you're thrust into that role bro play captain america play john bass alone before he died on iwo jima run that shit right i see where he's at he wants he wants to do the job he wants to do the job and i mean social media would suck if you're trying to hide everything especially with what you do and you're like ah this could endanger my family now everyone yeah i guess in america knows you and not only america overseas so you don't know the repercussions of that. You're just like, dude. Which I totally understand,

like the privacy concerns and stuff like that. But I mean, that being said, remember when ISIS released their kill list? Oh, yeah. Like five, 10 years ago, something like that. Tim Kennedy was on it. You know, he's got a backpack full of grenades. Well, so he's covered.

He's covered in that case. Yeah. But how many of our friends were on that fucking list? I wasn't. I was so disappointed. Like, it was double digits. Oh, yeah. People we knew on that list. But it... God, nothing ever happened. Like, it's a whole bunch of... Yeah, what about your pussies?

What was it? Like... They didn't kill one of my friends! What about your dicks? Have they met the influencer? They didn't even try. They met, like... How many flights have they ever been able to even afford over here? At least three. You know, that is my favorite comeback on the internet is every time somebody says something about like an aggressor nation.

I'm like, how about you get with the Taliban? You guys brainstorm. They tried for a year and failed. Maybe you guys can come up with a new plan to actually get me. They have really good helicopter pilots though. I was so disappointed. They get in the cockpit

there's way more controls than a donkey. And I can't f*** it. Where do you put your dick? Where does the penis go? No. Is it the reason why they have the, what is it, the Toyota, the Hiluxes? It's the only car they can't destroy. The reason the Taliban is dead.

Sorry, I got like that. The reason is you. Who sung that? Chumbawamba? I wanted to ask around here. Right? So the common thing that I've run into is that America ran out of Afghanistan. We i wanted to ask around here right like so the common thing that i've run into is that america ran out of afghanistan we were chased out and all that

stuff like that like does anyone here feel that way or like where where do you where does your logic lie so i did the math on this yesterday okay g watt deaths okay five united states thousand two hundred something? So in Iraq and Afghanistan, I believe it was just over 7,000. That's Iraq and Afghanistan. And we compared that to just Afghanistan's numbers, didn't we? No, we compared that to the total deaths in GWAT. So American

deaths, roughly around 7,000, which is nothing to sneeze at. Over the course of how many years? 21, 20? Yeah, something like that. How many total deaths in GWAT do you believe? I know of Afghanistan only, which is estimated between, for the Taliban

and coalition forces for them, between 51 and 100,000. Total was 4.5 to 4.7 million. Fuck. The KDR is 600 to 1. It's more than that. We did the math.

Yeah, it's like 650 or something to 1. It's like... They're going to cause campers. That's what they're going to do. It's a lot of airstrikes. We got pulled out by anti-cheat. Yeah, that's... Do you know how many tactical nukes we

could have called in oh my god a lot i don't tell us about the missiles there i mean we were actually the only one in that conflict you could have called in to answer to answer your question you have to like people don't have a good grasp on like when a war ends i guess so the problem is is like in my opinion a war ends when you dismantle the current government yeah whereas a lot of people seem to be under the impression the war isn't over until you dismantle the current government and get every single civilian on your side at all times yeah establish a brand new government right which is easy when communism is your opponent well yeah, that's true. Because people get food.

It's really easy to buy them over food. You want food or you don't want food? You want to eat? Yeah. Or do you really want to go home? That's what Denzel said. We were doing that when they were still communists with the Berlin airlift. That's true.

It's just, so I broke down just Afghanistan because I couldn't speak for Iraq. I got bored and I was like, I wonder what, you know, because for me, a good measure of a country's fighting force is if you took both of those countries and around the same time you had them fight the same enemy. Holy shit. The Russians fought. Well, the Soviets fought Afghanistan from 1980. I want to say 83, 84 to 88. Actually, maybe earlier because theirs was 10 years. And then we fought from 2000.

Yeah. And then we fought from 2001 until 2021, 2022, wherever we did. So I was like, let's do a side-by-side comparison. Turns out Russia in 10 years lost 15,000 troops in Afghanistan. We lost in 20 years 2,400 troops. So Russia was 79 to 89. 79 to 89, okay. In their defense, how much of that was to exposure

to the elements due to bad logistics of communism? That's true. You know, people always bring up the statement. How many of them would have still died in Russia? That's totally true um but the u.s and so then i was like all right well let's look at enemy kills the the russians killed between i want to say it was 75 to 90 000 in their 10 years of enemy troops which also like just to prove the fucking hammer that point home they were doing things like poisoning water holes yes they were it was genocide to them you didn't know that no no they were straight up like pouring like poison in water water sources they were putting landmines

inside of teddy bears like russia was just like okay hey literally we were trying to avoid civilian casualties they were trying to cause them. And I can prove that mathematically. So, well, at least by the numbers. So the U.S., we killed between 51 and 100,000 enemy combatants while we were there in 20 years. So relatively comparable. Now we look at civilian casualties. The U.S. civilian casualties, best estimation for just Afghanistan, not Iraq, just Afghanistan, 49,000. Now, civilian casualties by the Russians in 10 years, a little over 1 million.

They were killing everything. Just stacking bodies. So, like, I don't understand why U.S. gets all this flack about us, like, oh, constantly killing civilians. Like, the Russians are way worse, like, tenfold to what we did. Actually, like, I think that's like 12 or 15-fold to what we did. Yeah. That's fucking wild. Yeah.

Well, communism, right, Nick? Uh-huh. You love it. Big fan. Actually, when's your next communism video? Who won the Cold War, Nick? I don't know. Us?

Metallica? Yeah. the Cold War, Nick? I don't know. Us? Metallica? What do you want me to say? Blue Jeans? Yeah. I always love that. Like, America didn't win the Cold War. Like, it was between the U.S. and Soviet Union. Which one of those still exists?

Thank God that show happened before they dropped the Reload album. Yeah. Ugh. Can I... I haven't told it this story. We might have lost the cold before. We got a story. It's not my story. It's a buddy of mine who is Special Forces. And since we're talking about Afghanistan and the Russians, it was one of my favorite stories to listen to.

My buddy would tell it all the time. And I want to share it with you because I think it's cool. So during the Russian pullout of Afghanistan, there with you because it's i think it's cool so during the russian pullout of afghanistan there was a base i forget where it is i wish i could tell you the name somewhere in afghanistan the russians are pulling out and they're they're driving everything in fucking trucks right so they're like hey here's the space the taliban's coming up they're pushing back or taliban whoever it was muzha hadin back then they're they're fighting us we're pulling out and they're murking us as it goes so what we're gonna do is we're gonna send everybody

from this base in a fucking massive uh convoy up this one road to get the fuck out of here go to russia and a bunch of spetsnaz are gonna stand by their special forces are gonna stand by at the post and fight off anybody that comes and i forget if the Spetsnaz were just like there on a mission, like we're here to defend until whatever happens. Or if they had some trucks and they could get out of there. Either way, the opposite side was ready. So the massive convoy is leading with all the shit. They get in this valley. They get an ambush. Everybody in that ambush dies. All the leading with all the shit. They get in this valley. They get an ambush.

Everybody in that ambush dies. All the trucks, all the equipment, every single Russian dies. And then there was an attack on the post and it's all a Spetsnaz and they're all in one building and all the Mujahideen close in on this building and they kill every single one of this building. You can see this building is filled with bullet holes. You're like, Rich, what do you mean the building's filled with bullet holes? My buddy's there with one of the Mujahideen that had fought the Russians. And he's like, hey, so this is where you fought all the Russians?

Like, yeah, we killed all the specimens. We're in this building and we murked it. We just threw everything at it. Rockets, RPKs, PRKs, everything with a fucking They were in this building and we marked it. We just threw everything at it. Rockets, RPKs, PRKs, everything with a fucking K was at this building and we killed all the Spetsnaz. And he's like,

well, then what happened? He's like, do you see this big concrete pad? He's like, yeah. He's like, they're all buried here. They dumped all the Spetsnaz in a unmarked grave and then poured concrete over it it's just all this dirt a building that's all fucked up and this random pad of concrete that's like poured shitty like by you know well afghans by afghans and so and that's how the conversation

got brought up he's like hey what's this big concrete pad he tells him that story and he goes and the concrete pad you're standing on is all the spats that I and all these other guys killed from the Mujahideen. Holy shit. You're talking shit on the construction skills or the concrete pouring skills of people who could never conquer the third story building. That's fair.

That's... Yeah, that's about right. They're not Mexican. The only thing they can build. They're not Mexican. The only thing they can build well is graves. Yeah. All right. I got to ask a question real quick. Okay.

So you guys, some of you have been to Afghanistan before. You got all these influencers who are like, oh, we're taking our vacation to Afghanistan on TikTok and stuff. How do you feel about that? They're doing that? Yeah, dude. Like these fucking little baby boy influencers are like, we're taking our vacation to Afghanistan. Griff seems to really like it.

Like, obviously those people are just retarded, but. I mean, if you're Muslim and a man, that's probably kind of cool. It's probably great if you're Muslim and a man. Would you let your wives go there alone? Nope. No. It depends if I're Muslim and a man. Would you let your wives go there alone? Nope. No. It depends if I want a divorce. Yeah.

Hi there. I'm Ryan Reynolds, and I have a list of things I like to have on set. It's just little things like two freshly cracked eggs scrambled with crispy hash brown sausage crumble and creamy chipotle sauce from Tim Hortons. From my rider to Tim's menu, try my new scrambled eggs loaded breakfast box. Did I sign a prenup or not? It's a lot like going on vacation in North Korea. They're going to let you see what they want you to see, but like

if you spend enough time there, you're going to find out that women are for babies, men are for pleasure, so are goats, and so are fucking donkeys. I mean, tell me if I'm wrong, anybody. We have more in common than we think. It's crazy like the thing that i i would say overall bothers me most about afghanistan when i see like these young influencers go there like i i think back and you see like world war ii vets like you guys have had

world war ii vets here on the podcast and i'm so fucking jealous of that by the way like those guys are just living legends and uh like they get to if they want to go back to normandy and like see where they've been previously they're treated like heroes too yeah and i know like for people in g that was liberation in france yeah i mean yeah i know for those of us in like g watt we'll never be able to do that. Like we'll never be able to go back. And so like, when I see all this shit and like all these, these kids going over there, like they have no idea that we, we spent 20 years of just everything we had to give a generation of children and families hope. Like that was the thing that bugged me the most when we pulled out of Afghanistan and everything collapsed is like, I gave everything i had to give a generation hope and the afghans that we left in

charge are cowards like that's the thing that burns me the most about the whole situation influencers doing influencers yeah influencers being i've met my first influencer in the wild oh no i did it was some dude he had like fucking stickers all over his bone stock mustang gt like he didn't even have the fucking a regular license plate on it he had like the the stupid 360 camera sticking off the back of it he's doing 40 miles an hour down rogers lane and just like switching lanes real quick thinking he's cool and i was like oh you silly bitch i'm just trying to go get some chinese food man like i love you that was my first time ever seeing one we had uh i i know i think we've had the same uber driver

before uh the guy who uh like the afghanist uh the guy yeah he was uh he was an interpreter in afghanistan oh hell yeah and uh some of those dudes are legit well he his whole thing is he's just trying to make enough money here uh to get his family out because his family is still there. Fuck. Which that's its own wild thing is like being able to leave your family there in Afghanistan. You helped, but we're not going to bring you back. Yeah. Good luck.

The whole pullout, like I'm so torn because on the one hand, I look at it like my brain is torn, right? Like you got moral and then tactical. Tactical, leaving fucking quickly makes logical sense. Less bodies used. You know, it's more expensive to get that equipment back. Like I totally understand that. But the moral aspect, we had a lot of allies and assets and people helping us there. Like we shouldn't have done that.

That and I just don't believe in pulling out. I do the push and pray. I push past all her important stuff and blow my load into her heart. What the fuck? Welcome to the unsubscribe podcast. I love how quickly we

oscillate. It's like a metronome. Yeah, it's like very serious words that I don't know what they are. I'm going to take it as an offense. Yeah. I'm going to make you subscribe. I'll slake the shit out of you if you say that word again.

He's going to influence you. One question I had. I don't remember how everyone met because everyone has different... How did you two meet? How did Brandon... I know the story about how me and Rich met. Yes, it's one of my favorite stories. has different, like, how did you two meet? How did Brandon, like? I know the story about how me and Rich met.

Yes, it's one of my favorite stories. Because you're fucking Mike the Cop. Yeah. Because we were all hanging out in Charleston, South Carolina, because Cody just invited us down. That's the one I didn't go to. Yeah, that was the one you said you were going to. Yeah, we invited you to go there. And just like usual, you were very late.

By not going this time. We never know when Eli's showing up. That's fair. I made a joke to JT this morning. I was like, hey man, I'm going to go see the boys and blah blah blah and do a podcast. And he's like, oh, that's cool. I was like, yeah, I'm supposed to be there at noon. I'm going to show up at 1230 though because, you know, Eli.

And he's like, yeah, that's about it. We didn't start until like 2, 2, 3, 2. Yeah. I don't even know what time it was. I've been drinking. Hide of COVID. 2020. Summer love. Summer love, baby. Yeah, because that's when the riots happened in Buffalo. Shit was burning down

in Charleston, too. I invited Eli to come down. We got a nice beach house on Isle of Palms in Charleston. He said, I'm going to the airport now. And then I didn't go. I'll be there in like three hours. Four hours later, I'm like, I don't think Eli's coming. That's the most I'm on my

way text I've ever heard in my entire life. I'm on my way. Not even to the airport. When I was supposed to first meet Savannah, I'd never told this. My first flight, I was going to go out there. I was visiting a friend and I was going to go meet her. I'd never told this. My first flight, I was going to go out there. I was visiting a friend, and I was going to go meet her. And I texted her that day.

I had a ticket and everything. I was like, hey, I'm actually not going to go. Like, sorry. I just didn't feel. I was like, eh, something feels off. I'm just not going to go visit my friend or her for the first time and waited. You? Yeah, I know.

Weird. So I stand up. There's the tism right there. You're like, oh, my God, that's too much people right now. So I got up everybody. There's the tism right there. I'm like, that's too much people right now. So I got this big house. I was like, invited all my friends out, Eli included. And, you know, my good friends, Brandon Herrera, Rich Comes. And what did you say to him, Brandon?

We had never met before. Remember the first thing you asked me? What kind of man am I? I don't remember this at all. You said, hey i do remember this go ahead the the gun yep yeah you an ar guy or an ak guy and i said you know what i really like ars i like they're my jam but i just i love ak's man i think i'm more of an ak guy i had no idea who the fuck he was good and he was just like sweet we're gonna be friends i was like ah cool and then i made you know he didn't know who i was he thought i was mike the cop but uh i also never seen a single video he did and i lied and said

yeah i love your stuff always you know i i legitimately thought i i like i'm like oh i'm pretty sure i've seen him around because the way you described him like oh i think i know who you're talking about and we're on the beach and i had said something and i don't remember what it was but it was one of those like so i glanced us i remember some shit like yeah you were like i had like three beers and and i was like hey do you think i'm mike the cop and his face went i had been not only like was i called out for something off but he was called out exactly who I thought you were. Yep. I was like, because I'm not him.

And I and in my typical fashion, I thought it was hysterical that he felt awkward. And then I thought I was like, this is the best joke ever. Bullied for the rest of the week. Oh, it was great. I loved it. I had dude. I had ammunition every time you wanted to say something. I was like, alright, well, you know, like and subscribe.

Mike the Cop. And he was just like, fuck. Fuck. The first ever fuck you rich I think you ever got. Yeah, that was the first one. Yeah, it's the start of many fuck you riches. How did you meet Cody? That was our first time that we met in person. It was actually the same thing but we were like

talking back and forth on the internet and you're like oh you're still in like that's cool um dude i you know what we we just kind of broed out i it's it's such like a man's story like you know like the typical uh wife said you tell your wife hey i'm gonna go golfing with gary and you come back from golf with gary and wife's like you know what's going to go golfing with Gary. And you come back from golfing with Gary. And your wife's like, what's going on with Gary and his wife? And you're like, I don't know. Us, the first time we met. Dude, I feel like I haven't changed at all.

I'm just... Because I gave you my shades. Yeah. I was going to be young, Brandon. And the wife asks you, hey, Gary broke up with his wife. Did you talk about the divorce? And you're like, oh, no. But you were golfing with him for four hours. And that's kind of me and cody like i don't know what started

our friendship or when what we started talking but we were already like friends and knew that we melded together and he invited me out to go hang out and then yeah and then i made like three videos about you freaking out on public servants and oh god the knife hand of the judge is probably my favorite he retired did he yeah he's no like the influencer guy guy fucking guy his his uh daughter stepdaughter through marriage i think is works with me. The funniest thing was, like, I'd known you for, like, a little bit. We were friends. And you would text me, and you're like, I'm on the news again. Yep.

Like, hey, what the fuck are you on? And I would just search it up, and sure enough, guy. Guy. Listen here, guy. When you made the chest bump video of me chest bumping that dude, I think it was with Taylor. I think it was Taylor at the time. It was.

I was in bed and she was next to me and I wanted to watch it with her. I was like, hey, Cody made a video about me chest bumping this guy and let's watch it together. And when that part came on, I laughed so hard. I was kicking in bed on my back. I laughed so hard I was kicking in bed on my back. I laughed so hard. Calling it a chest bump is like calling you an influencer. Ethan, have you seen that video? No, I don't think I've seen that one.

I was just thinking about the one where- Dude, this little Puerto Rican kid tried to get his friend out of a police car, and Rich runs over and just chest bumps him. And he goes flying. Dude dude he goes flying i gotta see this man i the only one i've seen like before uh i mean i guess before i really knew who you guys were was when you pin down the uh the minority i know that doesn't narrow it down that was my video that sounds worse that sounds bad the guy who was there with the skateboard like hitting the i think he hit your truck or something like that and like people were like you can't kneel on him he's a black man and you were like he's just a man and that was i was which is like the least discriminatory thing possible unfortunately it happened right across the street from this

massive apartment complex filled with pieces of shit and then all the pieces of shit that were in that apartment complex emptied out and just made it a complete race thing. As you're in full uniform to army uniform, right? I got it. I got it. What? The,

the, the chest bump in space. We can put this up on within this. I got to watch this. And here I come out and the crowd starts interfering with the arrest. That's when the commander in pig shows up. Oh, I love it. Oh, it's so good.

Oh. This is it. Oh. Oh, it's so good. Oh, my God. Remember when we enjoyed making videos? Yeah, right. That was crazy. Oh, my God. Don't worry.

It'll happen again. Once I get back on the streets, I'll let you know when I get. Cody, by the way, I think you should go back to the mustache. I really liked it. I like the beard. Lose the beard, keep the mustache. I think it was magical. It was good.

Moody. Yes. Mustache only? Nope. Yes. The eyes of terror. Yes. My mother's saying no.

Mom says no. Mustache only. Yeah, mustache only. He's so handsome with a mustache. Get that dick broom back. Can I tell you something? Two stories come from that. One, inside baseball, while I was running towards him, that guy that I chest bumped,

I was like thinking, am I going to forearm him and give him an elbow and put him under arrest for trying to – he was literally trying to un-arrest somebody that was being arrested. He's like grabbing officers that are trying to effect an arrest. Am I going to elbow him and do a use of force at a full sprint, which is probably – he's probably not going to wake up from that for a little bit. Am I going to elbow him, do a use of force and arrest him? And then at the last second I'm like none of that is worth it. Drop it. You're just going to chest bump him out of the way. So my arm's up here and I'm sprinting

and then I go drop, chest bump and then he came back and I was like well you wrote your own story today in handcuffs. It was a choose your own adventure. Did you see the one Wrote your own story today in handcuffs. It was a choose-your-own-adventure. And it flew. Did you see the one where you fucking hip-tossed that dude?

Yeah. Did you break that one down? We didn't know that was me. That never came out. Sorry. Oh, that one never came out? I don't think he's seen that video. And he's never done a breakdown.

You got a new video, Cody. Hip-toss. This is like two frames. It's like he's up, and then he is vertical to the concrete floor. I'm a new video, Cody. Hip toss. This is like two frames. It's like he's up and then he is vertical to the concrete floor. I'm up. Rich sees me. I'm down. The influencer strikes

again. I'm upset now because I built my entire career off of watching Rich beat the fuck out of people. Wait a second. Hold on. And that's 800 videos. Bring it back here. All I know is I'm getting on photoshop and taking that the cover from the movie the equalizer and changing it to the influencer

put Rich's face on it the full black face Rich is getting Rich in trouble if I don't do it it's not my fault oh man second story that came out of that is I had an internal affairs investigation on that oh you did when i never guessed it was it was not for the use of force

because the use of force was appropriate it was because one of the people that i arrested their mom complained because i went up to this person that was an armed robbery and we got the gun yeah that's that's how that whole scene started whole this person. That was an armed robbery. And we got the gun. We got all the people. That's how that whole scene started. The whole scene started because it was an armed robbery. And I had the victim in my car. We ran. I got over there with another cop. Guy had the gun, threw it.

Another guy picked it up. We chased him down. He threw it. I grabbed the gun. And then, this is where the complaint comes in. I go over to this person. And I go, You! come here, fat boy. Just like that.

I've heard the fat boy story. I go, come here, fat boy. He's like me. I go, yeah, you. And I grab him and I put him in hand and I throw. Well, I didn't put him in handcuffs. I threw him in the car because it was so chaos. There's only two cars at that point.

There wasn't all those cops there at that moment. It was chaos. There was only two cars at that point. There wasn't all those cops there at that moment. It was chaos. So I threw him in the car really quick and his mommy made a complaint that I called him fat boy. And the best part of this is this guy is retired now, but there was an internal affairs lieutenant that had seen me grow up throughout the police department from rookie to where I was at the moment. And he's like, Rich, your reports, when you write them to Internal Affairs, are great to read. Because they're exactly what happens in the camera, but it's you telling the story, but just typed out. And I can hear you say it. J.R. Tolkien over here.

And he goes, so we're investigating you calling this guy fat boy in that you shouldn't have said fat boy. And I go, but that's the physical description that I had of the person, that he was the fat person in the white shirt, not the skinny person in the white shirt, that I asked the victim. I'm like, hey, skinny guy in the white or fat guy in the white? He's like, fat guy. I'm like, sweet. The chaos erupts. So you had the victim saying fat boy. Yeah. So the whole chaos erupts.

And that's how I identified him as a suspect. So when I say, come here, fat boy, that's what the victim told me. So if you ask the victim, let's say he's of the darker persuasion, you asked him to say, is he the hard R in the white or the hard R in the black? Could you get away with saying it? If I was on the stand and they asked me what the person said verbatim, I have had to say the N-word

on the stand. You've done that? Oh, yeah. I feel like my oh, yeah was too excited. Oh, yeah. It's just the judge looking at Rich. Say the word. You're under oath.

That's a judge peer pressure. To be fair, Joe Biden has said the same thing, including in the floor of the Senate. So say the word. Yeah. When you're on the stand and either the defense or the prosecution, know the district attorneys are asking you like and what did the person say and you're like well they said you're not gonna catch me fuck you n-word well i say the whole n-word because that's what he said verbatim uh but in this case uh once again i'm talking to the internal affairs lieutenant and he's like this is the complaint you said of fat boy and i was

like i said fat boy and that's what he's like yeah and so during the internal affairs lieutenant and he's like this is the complaint you said of fat boy and I was like is that fat boy and that's what he's like yeah and so during the internal affairs investigation instead of saying fat boy I say like portly young man and overweight youth and like obese male I just try to

keep thinking of different adjectives to describe him and in the middle I'm like he's it's it's recorded, but not video. It's just audio. He's like, he's like putting his hand over and being like, stop, stop, stop. And I'm like, okay. You went full sing-songy is what you're saying. I went full sing-songy.

Yeah. He didn't like that I called him fat boy, so in my interview with Internal Affairs, I used every other word, including scientific medical terms like obese. Obese youth number three. Wait, Cody, what was...

How many times did you get investigated? Not enough. Did you actually ever like have like a serious investigation where they try to fuck you up yeah yeah yeah once or twice damn I mean when he specifically stopped on the side of the road and said you shouldn't have had the sun

go down and just broke out his ass that's uh Nick how did you get into this circle because like I think you were the reason i ended up in this circle and we'll get into how i met eli in a minute because that's i've been waiting like seven episodes of unsub to tell the story of how i met eli oh i've got a story about eli too the second time uh no i mean i've told the story before just cody just hit me up on instagram was like hey friend i was like hi you want to come on my podcast sure and then i flew out here and i was on the podcast but my favorite story is like when

he picked you up from the airport off dude the first three minutes i didn't know that like it was the first time i'd flown in 10 years like i didn't have uber on my phone or nothing i thought they were picking me up and he wasn't responding baddie wasn't responding i text cody's like yeah i'll be there in like 15 minutes. I'll be in the Raptor. Okay, cool. Pull up, hop in his Raptor. Hey, I'm Cody.

Hey, I'm Nick. How's it going? Blah, blah, blah. And then it's just like we're pulling out of the airport and it's just like awkward silence of like two people that don't know each other at all. And Cody just like trying to break the ice. Like, so what do you do? I was like, I'm an electrician. And Cody just goes fuck

my god and then the rest and then he drives me out to baddie's rental house at the time which i'm telling you right now baddie's house at the time looked like a house out of like uh the devil's rejects movie i was just about to say a thousand corpses it was literally like down a road that had not been maintenance since it was built 40 years ago and it's like you gotta put it in four-wheel drive to get there you get there it's this little tiny house just out in the middle of the desert most importantly the air. Most importantly, the air conditioning didn't work. The air conditioning didn't work. It was hot as fuck. You open up the door. His living room had like 7,000

reptiles in it. I could touch the ceiling. Alright, I'm getting fucking murdered. Probably should have vetted these guys more. I was like, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. I walk in the bathroom. There's a bathtub slash shower with no shower curtain. Just the rod.

That's where I'm gonna get my kidneys taken out of me later this is awesome why does it have ice in it so yeah that's how i got involved i do remember you asking me why should i do long form content though yeah that's true. It worked out. I think we were all at the redacted bar. Me and Brandon and Eli, we were all like, do long form content, Nick. No one's going to watch an hour. It's true. My videos are like, you know, two minutes long.

Who the fuck is going to watch me for 30 minutes? Now you make the longest videos of any of us. Yeah, that's true. Thank God you did long form otherwise you'd still be wearing that metal Roman helmet. What the fuck?

You talking about the Roman helmet guy? I don't know. That was a joke. I was making a joke like he stole his thing. Or the same person. We're not going to talk about the eyes and mouth thing that people steal. I was just about to make a joke about it.

How did you get in this group of misfits, buddy? It's a wonderful experience. So Eli messages me on Instagram. I think I've been tagged in unsubbed videos like fucking a thousand times. Show, did you message?

Was it Show that messaged me show just spawned out of the stairs what the fuck was that well okay I guess it was show message me it was like hey you know what do you want the tank

the tank man is here y'all keep talking shit don't start your car so she was like god damn it oh my god remind me i have a story oh god so show text me uh through instagram was like hey you know we'd like you to come on the podcast and i was like oh yeah cool i've heard of unsus unsubscribed but i okay i had no idea who was on it i had no idea who you were so i was like i'm gonna fucking look at eli right i'm gonna figure out who the who the hell eli is i looked into who baddie was at the time because i was i think that was the last podcast with that group yeah it was

was me and um kiss of death it was me that's his nickname yeah right so i like six hours go by because eli doesn't do anything on time and i completely forgot that i had contacted unsubscribe i have a brother named eli i love my brother death but he's also a convicted felon and a deviant who gets a new cell phone every time the sun goes down oh my clientele so i get a text from eli and says hey uh what's up this is eli and i think it's my brother and my response is something along the lines of oh would you get a new fucking phone for this time dickhead right like something stupid not realizing it was yeah i was like that's a weird response and like as soon as i said it like my brain like 30 seconds later clicked on it was like oh fuck like i panicked and i was like oh i'm so sorry man i have a brother named eli like i

thought this was him and they they you know you guys invite me out and i like honestly it was a really good experience i get here uh still don't know where the thermostat is in this house i have no idea where it is okay uh i was like everyone knows i could see everyone at the same time no one was here at the time it was just me and i was like oh this is cool like i took a couple of selfies like i'm on unsubscribe right and like i text you like because i can see my breath in this house and he goes oh yeah hey come on over to here uh you know i'm here with brandon not realizing brandon meant brandon fucking herrera so like eli nothing personal i was not a fan of you i was the biggest fan of cody not a fan

sounds like a dig i'm sorry i hated your content i looked in i was like geeking over fucking cody and i had seen some of brandon's content so i knew who he was I didn't really know much about you and so like I walk into this bar and it's you and Brandon Herrera and I was like my middle name is not fucking I think it is, I'm pretty sure it is it's Gonzales

it's Consuelo Porquito de la Horta and Igor Montoya but yeah that was the first time i'd ever met brandon i remember taking a selfie with him that didn't turn out very well because there was a big light behind both of us and he probably thought i was a goober and uh i just thought you were a nice man yeah and that was my first experience here and i remember the second time i came i'd never met nick in person we talked to each other but i'd never met nick in person the second time we were at another restaurant when i showed up and nick was like

hey just come to this restaurant i was like cool and the only open spot was next to cody and i remember geeking the fuck out i was like oh my god it's done an operator i geeked the fuck out for a few minutes yeah that was my thing look i you were the only one i was really a fan of okay give me a break here. Y'all have really good memories. Do you remember when I said I don't remember anything? Look, man, I'm telling the story as it went. Didn't have to tell a story. Oh, god

damn it. Fuck you. Do you guys know that Eli has a magic cabinet in his kitchen? What? Bro, I went to Eli's right before I had to flight home, and I was like, I want one of those Eli gummies.

And he's like, cool. Oh, we're telling this story. And he's like, cool. And he walks over to a cabinet and spawns gummies. And I'm like, okay, cool. And I eat it and I'm like, that's fine. And then like 20 minutes later somebody else is like i want a certain type of fungus and he was like cool and he walks over the same cabinet

and hands out okay this is where he keeps his drugs that's fine and somebody's like somebody's like i want a protein bar and he's like cool he walks over the same fucking cabinet okay okay that's where he keeps all his edible shit, I guess. That's fine. That's fine. Whatever. Can I have a bottle of water? Same cabinet. So then somebody, we're talking about 8-6 Blackout because Tackett doesn't know much about it

and he's like, oh, bro, it looks like this. He walks over to the same fucking cabinet and there's bullets in it, too. It's the fucking Mary Poppins bag! Of a cabinet in his kitchen! I forgot about that! Eli reaches into his magic bag

And the worst part is, as it's going, I'm getting progressively more high And I'm like... What is going on? What the fuck is in that cabinet, man? So it's bigger on the inside It's his retardus. I forgot your face was... The craziest part of that story is

Cody goes, you know, I'm looking for like a thick young Latina. And then all of a sudden, Moody comes out of there. Was I not provided? I actually had an interesting question. And I was thinking about this on the flight over here. I don't know why I thought about it.

So we know communism, communism, communism summons Nick. I was just wondering what would summon the rest of you guys. Like stop resisting three times would probably be rich. Both of them. old habits die hard latina latina latina what about you brandon aka i don't know that's a that's a hard one because well trunnion trunnion trunnion trunnion trunnion trunnion i still get people commenting just I know exactly what I'm not. I'm not gonna lie. This was an intentional psyop of you and your fan base when I started doing angry meme review.

What is trunnion? Wait, hold the fuck on. I don't know this. You know, that's the trunnion. Tism, there's two trunnions on an AK. One's the rear trunnion that holds the recoil spring, dust cover stock, all that. Front trunnion is where the bolt locks up. And it also holds the barrel to the receiver of the gun. Brandon also says trunnion like four, five,

six, ten, a dozen times in every video he's talking about. I'm sorry I used the right name for the word. It's not a sexy word, though. Trunnion. Trunnion, ooh. It sounds like a sexually transmitted disease, in my opinion.

My balls are sliding on your trunnion, Brandon. Ooh. I just, like, never mind. Hey, you want to look at this? Oh, you've got a trunnion growing on your penis there. I want to see what my trunnion is. penis yeah you want to touch my trunnion choke rich and hear the word trunnion yeah when i die it's gonna be him choking me i'm gonna be like i'm gonna come when he kills me so i my psyop was i wanted to affect Brandon and his community.

And so I was like, if I be like, because he says it so many times, I want to get Brandon to crack on videos and be like, Rich, every time I say now, I think of you and I fucking laugh and keep fucking up my videos. I think I've said that verbatim. Yes, you did. Like one or two videos. And also, I think I paused and was like, fuck you rich. Yep. And which fucking I came. So and then also

I wanted to see his comments be like he said trunnion 37 times and I wanted somebody to make a compilation of him saying trunnion. There is a compilation video from a fan. Is it really five minutes or seven minutes of you saying trunnion? is a compilation video from a fan is it really five minutes or seven minutes of you saying trunnion well it's going to be longer now there's going to be a new one i promise you they're going to grab it from this episode so my goal was i wanted to you know

like make trunnion a thing for brandon um without forcing him to do it by like my my psyoping skills and and it worked so well there is a video and it was uh i i saw it because somebody sent it to me and it said uh brandon herrera says the n word is the name of the youtube video yeah it's just me firing a pausa p50 i think it was and look at the camera and I go, nice. I was like, why does this have 40,000 views? Those comments have to be gold. It was all Tony Gonzalez's campaign. Yeah. That's all of the views.

Some of the videos they used in that campaign were fucking hilarious. Dude, they were great. I wonder if you run again since the last time, how many snippets they're going to get from Unsub or the Unsub Live or Pepperbox. You know they're going to pay for a subscription. What's wild is that they still had to outspend me

10 to 1 to even make any of it stick. Because it's crazy. Half the shit that they used to, they're just like, look, how can we make veterans hate this guy? And the more clips they showed, the more they were like, this guy's pretty f***ed.

This guy f***s. Dude, the whole premise of the thing kind of blows my f***ing mind. I try and explain to even my students, social media is more powerful than anything we know. And to put it in perspective, we are, what, 23, 24 years past 9-11? It's terrifying. And we have people advocating for terrorism because of social media because hamas has a better social media campaign than the idf does like social media is stupid

fucking powerful and the powers that be don't understand how powerful social media is it drives me they're starting to which is interesting it's it's been very funny to watch that ship get steered by the caboose oh god yeah when they try to use social media and they have the little hairy sissons. Oh, my God. Choose your character. The new White House, like all the comms they've got there have been fucking killing. Oh, it's great. The new social media team has been hilarious.

I love when you get like the weebs or the fucking super tards, liberal tards or whatever. Like I, everyone knows I don't pick sides. I just, I call both sides retarded if they're stupid, but like, they're like, I can't believe we have the president of the United States sharing this.

I'm like, fucking awesome. Terrorist dying. It's great. I love it. I love every bit of it. Getting some like fentanyl dealer deported to studio. Ghibli copies is hilarious.

Oh, the fat lady. If it was a lady, a lady then fuck i don't know what that was oh that was bizarre hilarious i'm like i love whoever's running this account dude it's crazy watching that new wave because they're treating it like here's old legacy media oh we'll do the same thing but now with our personal accounts i swear they probably use you guys as models for running for Congress because that was not done to that time. So how did not do it? No. Do you want to lose the congressional rule?

Yeah. I can give you plenty of advice on that. Well, think about it. If you would have spent maybe two million more dollars, you probably would have beat him. It was way less. Well probably that was less than i spent total because you you you lost by what like 70 something votes it was 400 votes in a runoff election so we we we progressed from the uh from the primary uh to a runoff so it was just

me and him and i think they like he and all of the, uh, you know, packs, super packs, everybody that was running ads for him, something like 13 million, I think is what it ended up being. That's fucking nuts. $13 million to beat a YouTuber as an incumbent, which by the way,

incumbents already have like a 93%, uh, 93% reelection rate. It's crazy. I would say you probably next time you have to put Cody on your payroll. Cause he was just, it was savage. You would say probably next time you have to put Cody on your payroll. It was savage. You know what we can do after they spent $1.3 million?

$13 million? You know what we get to do? This. Get fucked. Get fucked. That was the only reason I got Twitter was to see what you said. You almost beat your opponent

and we get to get drunk and talk shit? You know what happens if you lose? The streets, motherfucker. You know what happens if I lose? No. The drink changes. That's fucking crazy. the streets, mother******. You know what happens if I lose? No! The train changes. That's f***ing crazy. God damn, best job ever. Best job I ever had. I do have to do

a quick shout out to my boy Jankwagon here. He's, uh, Jankwagon. It's a 1068 that was constantly falling apart and lighting on fire. It looks like a toaster with tracks. My boy is having some liver failure. He's a good dude. I told him next time I'm on Unsub It looks like a toaster with tracks. My boy is having some liver failure. He's a good dude. I told him next time I'm on Unsub, he's a hell of a dude.

Jank Wagon's fucking awesome people. So I told him I'd do a shout out on Unsub. I'll do 21 push-ups for you. Yeah, 21. We hope Jank Wagon's doing okay. There we go. You got it from Brandon Herrera. Cody, I do want to ask a question.

Where do you think you're going to get married at? Ooh. Charleston, South Carolina to ask a question. Where do you think you're going to get married at? Ooh. Charleston, South Carolina. Oh! I'm in a place to be. Is it going to be water? What are you thinking on that? Oh, dude. I want big oak trees

with moss hanging off of them. What's the scent you're going to use for the table? You've been waiting your whole life for this. Oh, yeah. This is your first and only one, isn't it? Yeah. What? It wasn't you, Rich. I'll still marry you. Shut God every time!

Man, I'm just... I thought you were sad! I was trying to build you back the fuck up! You couldn't read the subtext that said awkward silence in parentheses? Yeah. That's what Rich was going for. Yeah, I was trying to build you back the fuck up. You couldn't read the subtext that said awkward silence in parentheses? Yeah. That's what Rich was going for. Yeah, I was trying to break the awkward silence by making a statement about someone I care about.

Did the parentheses say something about the awkward silence? No, I wasn't paying attention to that. The guy can read everything but the room. Every training manual. I understand missiles, not people. Okay, that is my fucking tism. We got the tism tightened over here when we're talking about

cameras. That's a great shirt. It's just, I can read missiles, not people. That is a really good shirt. The missile knows where it's not. Dude, watch it. Just going on kind of consensual and reading just the one I missed an episode i

turned that one on and i was like oh what happened in this one i just did a quick jump in it you just shaved your head i was like and then immediately wherever i skipped rich is just lighting him up i was like he just get bullied that was the whole episode getting shit on then i read the comments and it's like rich is so mean to him i was like dear god my wife yelled at me and she came on i think you were you were back and it was the four of us or you might have you might have left i think you were gone after that one it was just three of us i'm so glad i was and she came on over my shoulder and she's talking to the guys and she's just just like, I told him not to pick on Ethan.

And I'm like, he's not here. I'm still going to pick on him, though. He doesn't have to be here for me to do that. She's like, I told him he's got to be nice. Everybody was mean to him in the comments. And I was like, he's a grown-ass man. He's okay. I can handle some smoke.

Yeah, then I got that text from you. Okay, we don't talk about that. All right. Over the top. All I said is that you were going to be explicitly named in my... All I'm saying is I think you've got good enough hand-eye coordination where you could... The first time...

Jesus! You can't put that one in. You can't put that one in. Hysterical. Glad you said it. You just can't put that one in. You beat me put that one in. Hysterical. Glad you said it. You just can't put that one in. You beat me to that shit. I was about to say, he got the good

to explain. That's how I know I got into the right friend group is they immediately make s*** jokes. You guys are really going for the neck on this one. Look at me. I think on that one, we can close her out, Mr. Cody.. Oh, man. I think on that one, we could close her out, Mr. Cody. We're going to close it, buddy.

Are we doing an after show? Yeah, we'll do a 10-minute after show. Just complete chaos. Well, guys, thank you for coming to the Unsubscribe podcast. I was joined today by Eli Doubletap, fat electrician, angry cops, habitual line crosser, Brandon Herrera, myself, don't operate it. Join us on patreon for the after show love you love you oh yeah where do we find you habitual line crosser.com uh buffalo pd.org let him know how good of a job i'm doing that i deserve a fucking way can they

yeah you can you can email and you can hey on some welcome hi what's the website that's not a website it's it's the buffalo police department's email go to that email tell them what a fantastic member rich is to society and you're gonna get called to someone's office influencer yeah just address him as the influencer no don't do that the higher-ups don't know that they're gonna be like what god what you and him maybe this just isn't the episode for that be like in any buffalo

news outlet you can find rich all I want to see is go to google go to leave a review at buffalo pd and just leave a really five stars for rich and just be like love rich no just call up the buffalo police department headquarters and tell them that i would just love to see the fucking fake reviews it's like five star uh detective richard high my wife and it was fantastic she loved it and i cried when they looked at me and said how beautiful it was oh my god i saw that video and off to the after show You don't know my name Will you see my face

You don't know my