Unsubscribe Podcast - 25 - Purple Kittles

Episode Date: October 13, 2021

OK NEW EDITOR SAME S&!T SHOW! Basically the moral of this entire episode is don't ever drink Bang MIXX Seltzers. EVER. Also look at us with a video on a wednesday like we said we woulld. wink wink. Thanks for checking out our podcast! ------------------------------ WHERE TO LISTEN Spotify https://spoti.fi/2Ye8YOU Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/3cbqY4k Amazon https://amzn.to/2YbzQia Google Play https://bit.ly/2YcWmaD Stitcher https://bit.ly/3cbnY8o ------------------------------ Follow the Cast of Unsubscribe -Baddie- https://www.twitch.tv/baddie https://twitter.com/BaddieStreams https://www.instagram.com/baddiestreams/ https://www.youtube.com/baddiestreams -DonutOperator- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwkm_Wcyh0pc7UUmZZfL-6w https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator/ https://www.twitch.tv/DonutOperator https://twitter.com/DonutOperator -Eli_Doubletap- https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://www.twitch.tv/Eli_Doubletap https://twitter.com/Eli_Doubletap   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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and terms apply instacart groceries that over deliver three two one nice got it what the fuck is this i don't wait how is this welcome to wait who don't sorry welcome to the unsubscribed podcast i'm joined here today by eli double fap and stage look bad baddie streams god i love your instagram name can never change like i want to start a new youtube channel but like i want to make a youtube channel but like do i name it bad i have to stick with batty streams now like you have to i have to you have pigeonholed me thank you badger streams bad streams and then batty on fucking twitch don't blame me you're the one that chose baddie streams on ig because i can't get

baddie whose fault is that oh yeah because some chick has baddie doesn't she some instagram actually the the guy who has baddie on twitter yeah mine wasn't good either the guy who has baddie on twitter is like this chubby little round Asian looking dude. Dude, this is... Did you ask to buy it? Mine is... It says kiddles. Guess what it tastes like.

Don't say kids. Diddles? No. What? Stop. Both of you. What the fuck? Oh my god.

It says kiddles. Why would you go kids? Diddles? Like, no! What? What? It's like a food! Who the fuck would name a drink kiddles? So kids kids diddles like no what what it's like a food who the fuck would name kids or diddles okay so today what we're drinking is bang mix this is our new sponsor show bad it's super sweet

it's honestly it's awful there's sugar this tastes like if you're looking for an energy drink that has booze in it that has no energy. This is like trying Kittles. They're caffeine free, by the way. It's just worse for Loco. Why would you name it Kittles? Now that I think about this, this is not a good name. Who wants some purple Kittles? Kids.

Not me. A lot of you are slurping on kittles guess what it tastes like though what rhymes with kittles skittles yes yeah they probably couldn't say that so why go with kittles i have no idea could have gone with anything other than kittles they're so sweet so bad i love pina colada so i'm drinking frose rose because I'm fancy. Let's make an energy drink. What do girls hate? Let's rhyme it with grapists.

If there's not a grapist flavor, I'm going to be so mad. I don't want to do another grape podcast. That one's way better than that. That tastes like kittles. It tastes exactly like Kittles. It's like Kittles. It tastes exactly like Kittles. What's the last one?

What's the... What is this? All right, guys. We have to drink this entire 12-pack of this podcast. Bro. Strawberry Blast. Try the Kittles. I hate that name so much.

That one's awful. The Frosé Rosé is not good. Nope. I fucking hate it. That one's awful. The Frosé Rosé is not good. Nope. I fucking hate it. That's fucking awful. That's not a Skittle. It tastes like boozy Fruity Pebbles. It tastes like a sour.

Bang has never been like number one. There's only one flavor I liked for like a three-month period of time. I was like, man, that's really. Is it the blue one? No, it's always Cherry Limeade for me. You like Cherry Flavors? Fucking Cherry Limeade is like my weakness. Bang is the only flavor i was like man that's a really one no it's always cherry cherry limeade for me fucking cherry limeade is like my weakness bang is the only flavor i was like three months i'm like mom over it i'm like yeah but you're gonna get fast it'll be better how's the other one how that one's probably garbage what's the last flavor the last flavor? The last flavor is Strawberry Blast. That sounds terrible, too. We got Frose Rose, Pina Colada.

That's pretty normal. And then we got fucking the Grapist Kittles over here. I got Dittles. Dittles. Dittles Kittles over here. They're so sweet, man. They're so sweet. People not fucking.

I love sweet things. That's why I like White Claw and shit like that. But this is fucking awful. This is like drinking Kool-Aid you make. but not fucking. I love sweet things. Like, that's why I like white claw and shit like that. But this is fucking awful. This is like drinking Kool-Aid. You bang. You want to sponsor us for our beautiful review? Next episode, we're going to have some great things to say.

I promise. Guys, do you like alcohol and children? Introducing Kittle. Why won't they sponsor us? We're so confused. Will this be the episode we get canceled on seven and a half minutes we're gonna get started it's not going well uh okay so we'll start this one off strong. This is my subject matter. Fucking anime.

We got two of the boys watching two new animes that I'm so stuck for. We'll start with Batty because you have watched The Berserk. Batty. You watched the three Netflix movies? Oh, yeah. Okay. And he's read the manga. Batty's coming in here saying, quote, go send me one of your text messages.

Berserk is just bad hentai. It's honest. here saying quote go send me one of your text berserk is just bad hentai that's anime porn for all my uncultured individuals i want to know the porn baddie's watching if he considers that hentai bad the most vanilla there's like a tit maybe once in a while and baddie's like oh god there was a lot of my there was a lot of tit yeah there's a lot of there's a lot of a lot of time you watch these there's a lot of tit. There's a lot of tit. What's the last time you watched these three movies? A lot of grape. Wait until you read the manga. I've heard you tell me about it a bunch. If you think the movies are hentai, that is like PG-13 of the manga.

Oh, 100%. The manga is just like, woo. There's a lot of grape. A lot more grape. There was a good deal of grape in the movies oh no the the movies you're like this is this is very tiny amount of grape and compared to the manga series manga's gnarly yeah which if you guys haven't seen a berserk there's three movies on netflix check them out they're good that third one poor derrick carver derrick's like i've never watched anime before and then

he watched those yeah you guys made him watch that was like his intro to anime yeah it was three berserk movies on netflix he's never gonna watch anime yet he's like this is just bad porn i'm sitting here watching it with laurie casually she's like what the fuck are we watching i'm like eli he's like this is an eli movie i'm like yeah is it demon graping that girl oh and that's it's so that's so fast compare how the mango or the the episodic series happens because it's three i heard there's like an old 90s anime right and apparently it's a lot more backstory yeah you still don't know a majority of guts upbringing because they don't explain it there's just a blurry uh flashback of him getting graped yeah and it's it doesn't translate well whereas it's like it doesn't translate it's like

that's his that is donovan who paid his dad like four silver in order to grape him i love we're using grapes as a guys we don't know what we're talking about just pretend it's not fruit yeah yeah take off the g yeah but that's like that's the like guts as a child that's what he and then he kills donovan you didn't see that like literally no i think it shows him kill him and like in like one of the flash no that kills his dad oh it's his father he kills. Yeah, because he finds out. Because he asks his dad.

He's like, yo, what the fuck? He's like, yeah, I did that. And he's like, hey, dad, what you doing? So he's like, what? And he falls back. Dad fucking blocked. But Donovan is the dude that graped him. Grape's not funny, guys.

Yeah. God damn it. and grapes not funny yeah god damn solid start to this podcast i don't know how to kittles and grape this is why you shouldn't drink bang energy this is really good for bang buck. Our sponsor don't drink. Don't grape kittles. Man. Oh, fuck. But so Donovan did that. And then in the main guy, their next mission guts just straight shoots an arrow through his fucking neck. And then Don was like, oh, he looks over and Gus is just like, yeah, fuck you. Their next mission, Guts just straight shoots an arrow through his fucking neck.

And then Dom's like, oh. And he looks over and Guts is just like, yeah, fuck you. And you're like, oh. And then going forward. Because the movies are eight years put into three movies. Oh, see, I thought it was a couple years. I didn't realize how long. Well, mangas. Yeah, you missed a fuck the manga like really because you don't even know griffith's backstory with the

older the the one dude that's like griffith you're beautiful the king guy yeah there's like none of that explain is he like was griffith's one of the king guys little boy boys yeah i thought i kind of picked up on it but like they don't that's why I was so confident. I can beat them. And the king was like, you can't beat them. The generals are like, I don't know how you're going to beat them. But Griffith shows up, and the king's like, mmm. That fucking boy. That boy booty.

What do we call it? Boosie. Yeah, Boosie. There it is. There's the word I was looking for. Boosie. No, Boosie. Boosie is that squirrel that everybody in

texas is obsessed with but that's what happened the beaver some may say so you miss a lot once you read the make now if you go back read the manga you're gonna be like holy shit i'm caught up on everything and it makes way more sense did you finish the first mostly there's a little left in there and this is not great so i'm hoping this strawberry is a little better oh let's see let's see it has the small it's like a fine wine rolled around a little bit nope i like to put like the three elements it's like yo this has sodium magnesium and potassium in it it also has fucking shit in it yeah it's fucking straight dude dude it's not good i'm sorry these are not good now these are too sweet there it's unbelievably sweet like i i just like white claws we can just or fucking whatever the seltzer what what who's our old sponsor lone river lone

river what ranch you only remember Lone River? You were like, Lone River. I don't remember the rest of it. What was it? 20 podcasts ago. And then Donut, our boy, started watching. Oh, shit. It's a long title.

I know it's slime, but it was like I was. That one time I was reincarnated as a slime. That one time I was reincarnated as a slime. What do think that's so good it's really cool john and i have been watching it together and it's like super good you got this japanese dude and he's just like an everyday worker he's a virgin 27 years old so good he gets fucking have you watched it no bro it's so fucking good i wanted to but i couldn't find this is episode one this is like literally 10 minutes in yeah a robber comes up to him on the street and fucking stabs him in the heart. And he's, spoilers!

And he's bleeding out. My character's dead. He's bleeding out on the street, but then he wakes up in like basically an MMO. And he's a slime, just a simple little slime. And he's like, where am I? What's going on? Like level one monster in a dungeon of slime yeah and he started complaining about when he was dying so this whatever is the ai that's like

takes him to this thing it's when you're complaining about stuff it's build your character she's like i hate being i'm going cold it's like resistance to cold resist to heat yeah heat cold pain he's like oh i'm in so much pain it's like it resists it's like i don't want to die invulnerability and he becomes this slime and he's just like the ultimate being but they give him the um the one where he's able to uh predator yes oh they give him predator so he can absorb like he just literally go around a creature and absorb we're talking like dnd fucking gelatinous cube style just yes he takes all their abilities and their strength and he figures this out like super early on when he respawns he's in

the most powerful dungeon ever when he he comes to life in the most powerful dungeon with the god pretty much of that area. Yeah. And they – should I go further? This is episode one. I haven't – don't spoil all the good good. This is episode one. Discover the exciting action of BetMGM Casino. Check out a wide variety of table games with a live dealer

or enjoy over 3,000 games to choose from like Cash Eruption, UFC Gold Blitz. Make instant deposits or same-day withdrawals. Download the BetMGM Ontario app today. live dealer or enjoy over 3 000 games to choose from like cash eruption ufc gold blitz make insta deposits or same-day withdrawals download the bet mgm ontario app today visit betmgm.com for terms and conditions 19 plus to wager ontario only please gamble responsibly if you have questions or concerns about gambling or someone close to you please contact connex ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge betmMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGamingOntario. Okay, so he just becomes the most powerful being in the world almost. I want to watch this later.

It's so good. He's about to get to the really good part where I know what's going to happen next. And I'm like, ooh, ooh, ooh. Yeah, I just got to season two. John and I benched like 10 hours of this. How many episodes are there? Is it like 10 or so? Like 46 total. Oh, there's a bunch.

The total. The first season is like, I think it's 12 episodes a season, I think. And it's, dude, it's really good. And he just keeps leveling up and leveling up and leveling up and like getting allies. And he's just the most powerful thing in the entire world. And everyone always doubts him. They're like, you're just a little slime. And he's just like, powerful thing in the entire world. And everyone always doubts him. They're like, you're just a little slime. And he's just like, and just like kills everything.

I want to say it's so bad on this, but I won't. But wait till he gets mad. You're going to be like, because he hasn't gotten mad. He's like such a chill dude. He's like, well, I'm the most powerful thing in the world. Wait till he agrees to get mad. And then you're going to be like, what the fuck? Like, that was my first.

I remember I was just on my couch like, what? What? This is the most dope thing ever. It's fucking baller. Oh, it's so good. And then the other anime that I would suggest is Tokyo Revenger. I keep hearing about Tokyo Revenger, and I haven't seen it it yet everybody i've heard that has watched it has said it's fucking awesome so i have to gonna have to do that for sure now the only anime i really like because i have i

watch my hero because they're coming out once a week i watch um uh what's that uh the in his ah dang it demon school demon school demon school is hilarious it's just a funny ass anime it's a human that's adopted by a demon like the human is treated like shit and he's like oh like literally just treated like garbage and then the parents sell him to a demon for money good yeah great parents if you get sick of john you can parents sell him to a demon for money. Yeah. Great parents. Hey, if you get sick of John, you can always sell him to a demon school. I need to sell him to a demon. So like the demons like takes him and he's like, he has this mustache curled, all that stuff. And he's like, Hey, okay.

Your parents sold me to you. You're I'm a demon. And he's like, ah, fuck. Uh, okay. And he's like, here's your new room and everything it's just he the demon lives in a mansion he's like oh okay he's like will you be my grandchild it's like and he can't say no like one the human he's so polite he's so nice he's the kindest kid he's like okay and he's like oh thank the grandpa's like oh thank god i would have had to kill you otherwise and he's like i think the grandpa's like oh thank god i would have had to kill you otherwise and he's like huh but now he lives in a giant mansion and he's just now finding his grandpa's

or his who adopted him is the most powerful demon in that realm and it's this human that when his first day of school he's like go to school grandson i fucking love you he's like okay he's like blend in i'll give you this ring you can fend it better so he's like okay so demons have wings and all this other stuff so he like goes up to school they sing the pledge at the beginning the pledge is about murdering humans and how fun it is and he's just standing like looking left and right demons are around he's like i don't like this at. And then the number one strongest demon challenges him at that school because he, like, does something. He's like, ah. And he's really good at dodging.

And he can't fall. So the demon's, like, throwing all this stuff. He's like, woo, woo, woo, dodging. And he beats him just by that. And then the number one demon's like, I pledge my loyalty forever. You are my commander. And he, like like bows down and all that and you have like and that's how he gets all he's so fucking weird i love it i love it so much

i'm like yes yes this is the best thing in the world jesus what's the next subject batty batty we came into this podcast with guys I'm still just not over how awful this bang is This is the worst fucking tasting shit I had to drink Gatorade to wash it down I'm sorry Baterade Can we say Gatorade? Gatorade Why can't we say Gatorade?

I don't know That podcast has 10,000 subscribers And John's bad about it Gator about it suing us no more podcast it's so bad i'm not i'm not drinking it i'm not it's awful how are you drinking that you just drink more than i did you drink two i mean not they're not empty like the skittles the best one is just sugar i hate this so much i gotta finish one get it get it yeah yeah baddie baddie baddie i'm gonna throw up no it's awful it's so sweet is there even sugar in this no that's the best part what sweetener did they use? It's artificial everything. Alcohol from cane sugar.

This has no ingredients. Carbonated water, alcohol from cane sugar, natural flavors. Don't know what that means. Citric acid, sodium, acid, potassium, phosphate, dibasic. Diabetes? Yeah, it tastes like it. Sucralose. That's where it is.

I definitely have diabetes. Sucralose. That's where it is. I definitely have diabetes. No, we both have diabetes. I have diabetes. There's no chance on how diabetes is. Betty has type 1. I mean type 2. 2. That's the one I forced upon myself. Yeah, not type 1. Which is apparently a big fight between those two. I was looking online.

My buddy was like, yeah, there's a debate on type 1 versus type 2. Type 1 you're born with type two you've you forced on yourself through bad habits literally like do i need a third muffin no boy i want a second muffin no okay matrix oh yeah the matrix trailer came out yeah matrix resurrection yeah okay okay so real quick matrix matrix reloaded loaded revolution yep and then resurrection or resurrected it's resurrection resurrection yeah i don't count the last two the all i remember from those two movies is they changed the oracle chick the key guy was cool and then they had a giant

underground sex rave party oh my god and then they had fucking um oh there was the twins those they were pretty cool yeah that was the second one yeah i forgot about colonel sanders he was like the owner of every yeah the uh no what they call him the colonel sanders yeah yeah colonels that's what they called him in there yeah colonel yeah the creator he was colonel sanders the construct there it is yeah but the guy that owns kfc yeah neo walked in he's like colonel sanders why are you here he's like i'm too drunk to taste this chicken batty have you ever seen right what's his name the construct yeah the construct i'm pretty sure the construct the construct yeah betty oh god how many matrix pornos are there with the construct all right in in the comments

below let us know the title of your favorite the architect yeah let us know the favorite your favorite matrix porno name dude colonel sanders was the architect. Yeah, he definitely was. Would you like my secret recipe? My secret recipe. 17 secret spices. That's all you know how powerful that man was. That was all he was doing.

He started KFC and then he started the Matrix and imprisoned every human being on the planet. They must like my 17 secret ingredients. Is that what the tubes into everybody was? It's just a liquefied KFC. Fried chicken. He's sitting in a bubble

of the 17. Just gravy. Just gravy. They wake up and they look out as fucking chicken drumsticks as far as they can see with humans attached. When Dio wakes up he's chicken drumsticks as far as I can see with humans attached The crossover I didn't know in their little pods Neo wakes up he's just spooning fucking gravy into his mouth

Hermione this is delicious that's how I remember the Matrix 2 what happened why did the Matrix 2 and 3 fail so bad did they they were

I was not a fan of them people didn't like those they didn't they like rush them out like one then two like a

like what happened back then there was a big difference rush them out like one than two like a like what what happened back then there's a big difference because you had the one that was like a hit and then it was a few years later and they're like two and three have to come out and you you didn't have i'm googling it because one was 1999 i remember i watched it probably 93 times that summer. Me and Jeffrey Langley's grandmother watched me and we watched that so many times. That's the only movie we watched. We watched it every single day. Dude, that MP5

scene. I don't know if you guys did this. Did you guys get the mod for Mad Max? No, not Mad Max. What was Bullet Time Video Game? 13. No, it was Max. What was Bullet Time Video Game? 13. No, it was Max Payne. Max Payne.

Sorry, you're right. Did you guys get the mod for Max Payne to do the Matrix? Nope. The lobby scene? Mm-mm. So one of the first mods for Max Payne was the lobby scene in Matrix. You walk through the metal detector and you're Neo.

Beep, beep. It's... And you just melt everyone. It was one of the best fucking mods of all time. It was one of the first mods I've ever downloaded back in then. That was one of the first video games that really gave me nightmares

because remember his wife and his kid gets killed and you're in his brain and you're having to hop around these you're in his brain and you're having to like hop around these little spots in his brain but his baby's crying yeah blood trails but his baby's crying the whole time yeah and i don't remember if he was crazy or he's up on something but all you can hear is his baby crying and you're trying to get to the room and you finally get there and like the cradle's knocked over and blood yeah you're like what the yeah that was like early god that was early 2000s

early 2001 or 99 that game is like when did that game fucking come out it was crazy because it was one of the first video games that featured like slowing down time and dodging bullets and being able to shoot people slowing down time stuff

2001 yeah it was such a good concept too it was the first because you have matrix and then you had that and that bullet time was fucking phenomenal back then i loved it so much but matrix two and three i don't know what they did the box office they didn't release in the same year though they were They were like back to back. One, two, and three? No, two and three were a year apart. No, they were the same year. No shit. Two and three were the same year?

What year? 2002 or three, I bet. Three. 2003, I'm guessing. Doesn't say the years. Doesn't say the years? No. Just type in Matrix 2. i got you matrix 2 years

2003 there you go holy shit yeah matrix reloaded was may revolution was november see it was real quick. Jesus fucking Christ. Those were huge budget films. Yeah. Hundreds of millions of dollars, I think. $150 million. Holy crap. That was Matrix Reloaded, $150 million. Basically, everyone's just saying it's because they went too big too quick.

Yeah, they dumped as much into it without explaining anything and uh it was visually fucking beautiful though yeah well i mean that broke the going into vfx that was one of the first uh say oh yeah speaking of vfx that's like the bible just yeah a lot of bullet shots bullet bullet time bullet time there was one director that did bullet time before them for a commercial for water or a soda um fuck i forget who they are it was the only time bullet times been done right before and it was literally right before the matrix and matrix came out they did bullet time but then you had um the 100 um agent smith yeah oh yeah yeah a bunch of dudes that kind of look like agent smith yes and then they did the 3d of them too yeah that was the third

one when he had all the agents standing around he had the pole scene when he's just yeah yep i feel like didn't quarter do a breakdown on that entire scene it's just fucking hilarious that i remember watching quarter uh i think it was their quarter crew channel yep did it and they break down like you just see tons of just random dudes that kind of look like hugo weaving but aren't him just like close enough we don't need to do anything to your face good enough then there's like random parts of just guys swinging their fists at nothing because they're in the background and it's like you don't see because it all happens so quick but when you frame by frame it it's fucking hilarious yeah it breaks down very badly yeah yeah it literally looks like a mosh pit circle fighting or there's dudes getting punched when they're not

actually getting punched because like the choreography was just slightly off for the background stuff it's like a guy was like getting his face thrown but there's nobody around him dude when you watch stuntmen react or because they have that stuntman react but you get to see how like stuntmen are waiting for their turn to get punched yeah because they're like if it is one character and you have everyone around that character the stuntman will be like they're like they have to look like actually busy yeah yeah they're busy they're like yo yo yo ready they like fly off and sometimes the stuntman will be like, they're like, they have to look like actually. Yeah. Yeah. They're busy. They're like, yo, yo,

yo, ready? They like fly off. And sometimes the stuntman is just like, blah, I'm just going to fling that way. Anyways, flings three,

six and like, I guess you got hit, whatever, but you don't notice in the moment. Yeah. It's like those quick scenes. Another one that got tore up for it because it wasn't quick enough was one of the, the last Jedi. I think it was the last Jedi, the new star wars movie oh god where there's the uh oh

the last beat before uh when all the red guards are fighting yes with who's the emperor uh he's not the emperor it's fucking snoke snoke the worst yeah i don't know what the fuck that was but they're all fighting there dude this it's hilarious you get to see them like getting they like flip for no reason yeah there's these background like they kind of look like the original Star Wars Imperial Guards with the red garb and shit on and

they're all fighting Rey and um Kylo Kylo Kylo yeah they're fighting Rey and Kylo and these dudes are just like doing back flips getting thrown when nothing's happening or they'll incorrectly react to getting hit like they'll take a right hook and they'll fly in the opposite direction and god everything about the fight is is so terribly choreographed it's like me punching you right now and your head flings out. So I'm like, exactly.

Or like there's guards, like there'll be a cool one-on-one guard scene fighting Ray. And then in the background, you see another guard just twirling his staff and flipping backwards and flying. You're like, what the fuck? Or they're just spinning.

They're like, I got to make up time. So it's like a jazz squad in the background. Dude, it's like, it's the a jazz squad in the background. Dude, it's like, we're, put, put, put it up, let's go! It's the Force, guys. Dude, and unfortunately for the movie with that scene is they put so much emphasis on the scene and it was not quick camera movements with it

so you easily pick up all this silly shit in the background. With The Matrix, that entire scene is rotations and the camera's moving there's nothing really static going on so it's your eyes are focused on the center of the scene you're focused on neo and and uh uh agent smith fighting each other versus star wars where it's just like camera slow move guy flipping you see reason. Like, what are you doing? And it's just like, ah, so it's cool to see, like, or not cool to see, I guess. It ruins it, actually. How they clearly didn't ruin or didn't learn it from anything.

I'm going to have to go back and rewatch that. So the new Matrix, the reason we're talking about this, the new Matrix trailer dropped. And it's very confusing. Uh-huh. Yeah. Is it? Or do you? Did you watch the teaser before the trailer? No, I didn't. Uh-huh. Yeah. Is it? Or do you...

Did you watch the teaser before the trailer? No, I didn't. I just watched the trailer. You want confusion, watch the teaser, because it is completely different. They don't show... The teaser doesn't show Morpheus, doesn't show Neo, doesn't show... Trinity? Trinity.

So you don't even... It doesn't even show so you don't even it doesn't even show those characters so you go into the teaser like I went to the teaser and I was like I don't know a fucking single person in this movie now why is John Wick in my Matrix movie right now

they don't even show like anyone you just are introduced to new characters I was like what the fuck is going on right now? Do you think it's going to be a good movie or a bad movie? I think it's going to be really good. I have a general idea of what I think happens. Oh, okay. Okay.

I was not expecting that. I thought it was going to be awful, to be totally honest. I'm scared. I'm terrified it's going to be an awful movie. No, so the third one, I just watched the third one with John. John wanted to watch the entire Matrix series, and the third one ends with neo he doesn't die right no he defeats smith and then the big godhead of the matrix grabs him they lower him down and take him away and that's the last you see of him yeah because they agree right on like

you he said free will yeah you leave uh zion alone and I'll defeat Smith for you. And that was their deal. Oh, versus, yeah. And so the new one, it looks like they reinserted him back into the Matrix and he doesn't know what's going on. And they're feeding the other pill.

Yeah, he's been taking the blue pills because it shows him throw them all out. It even shows him take blue pills. And so he's at his psychiatrist. Neil Patrick Harris is his psychiatrist out of nowhere. And he's like, I'm having these flashbacks. I'm seeing all this stuff. And like he's seeing the coating on the walls.

And so I guess he stops taking his blue pills. And then that's when in the trailer the new Morpheus shows up and he takes a red pill. And then it shows like all the crazy action shit. So he didn't even know who he was before then. They like wiped a bunch of his memory. I haven't seen the Matrix movies in fuck, ten years

probably? Yeah. I just watched them like last week where I wouldn't have put all that shit together. Oh my god, that makes so much more sense. So it's him waking up a second time from the Matrix. Yeah, like what the fuck's going on? Same for... I forgot that it was called Zion too. Fuck. Yeah. Do you think they left it alone though?

I don't know. They're probably still having big orgies in a cave down there. That's one of my favorite MTV skits that they did. Have you guys watched that? I don't think so. MTV SNL? MTV. The Zion sk kit with um keanu reeves no it is pete davidson bro this is he wasn't even born yeah he was he was like

wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait, wait, wait. What did I say? SNL? You said MTV. That's why I said SNL. MTV. MTV. Matrix. Parody. Oh, I was right. I was right. Zion, hear me!

He's having a huge orgy at his place later tonight. At least that's what many of us have heard. Wow, there is actually a whole bunch. Parody. Orgy. Parody, orgy. Because you said orgy. Yeah, because that's what it was. They were just fucking and dancing. That's the best part.

That's literally an orgy. There was angry, loud music, body sweat. Sweaty case. Fluids everywhere. Yeah, dude, we could pause it and kill it. The rivers flowed with cum that day. Yeah, they did. Who was the Andy...

What's his name? Milonakis? No, Andy, the blonde guy that was the weird one in a lot of skits. Andy... Oh, Dick. Andy Dick. Yep, that's it. God, you did it.

Isn't that the old dude? He had a TV show. He did at one point. Didn't he grape some people, though, and got canceled? Did he? I'm not surprised. Didn't he grape some people though? He got canceled. Did he? I'm not surprised. Andy Green? Wasn't it Green? Tom Green? We can't watch this.

This is nine minutes. Okay, well I'll send it to you guys. There's a lot of names being thrown around right now. I don't know what's going on anymore. This is the Tom Green show. Yeah, that dude was fucking weird. It was not my favorite show. It was a weird show. I'll send you guys this afterwards. We'll put it in the pocket.

It's fucking ridiculous. I'll try to remember. Sandy Dix is like, yeah, the orgy keeps going. And they focus around. It's all about that orgy scene where it's like, why was there a cave orgy? Because they were having a rave. Where else are you going to have an orgy? Batty, it's the end of times.

End of times. You're right. You're right you're end of times okay okay they eat oatmeal every meal you see what they eat the fucking a rave with an orgy is the highlight of their life so why would that not be going down they think they're all gonna die die. And then Neo wins. And everyone's standing around covered in cum. And they're just like, Neo won. Oh, no. You have to go to work. They just start scooping off the cum. They're just sliding it off.

That was an episode on Rick and Morty Summer and Rick they did the world ending party oh my god and the world didn't end so they kept going so they kept going

until another world was ending but then the dude woke up and he's like he fucked his dad right the little worm guy he goes into work

the next morning he's like well the world didn't end dad and he's like mom's not talking to us it's the same thing that happened in the matrix yeah it's that awkward moment

they're all like oh neo1 fuck it's like hey steve sorry about the cum it's that next day at work when you're showing up to the office or college your cave office yeah and you're like oh no steve i need you to the office or college. Your cave office. Yeah. And you're like, oh, no. Steve, I need you in the office right now.

HR needs to talk to you. So apparently you came on a few people. You came on Steve and you gave Catherine pink eye. You did too. We all did. Yeah, we all gave Catherine pink eye. First off. First off. Neo wasn't supposed to win. Yeah. we all did yeah we all gave Catherine Peacock first off first off

Nia wasn't supposed to win yeah we didn't know this shit was going down like it did I thought it was the last day of our

life so the matrix the matrix go check it out go check out the matrix oh no man I don't know

hopefully it's good I just I'm worried it looks good I don't like the never it's good. I'm just worried. It looks good. I don't like the... Never mind. It's back to anime. I hate the 3D stuff in anime.

That is... I was thinking of crazy 3D effects and shit like that because of how awful they were in Reloaded and Revolution. And then I was like, I hope they don't do that again. No, I think it's going to be good no i think it's i think it's gonna be good i think it's gonna be much better it's a lot easier today with the what we have available for vfx versus now versus back in the day but it is very much budget dependent and then how what vfx tame they hire and then you're just like oh for the best you're like can you do 3d stuff like

that can you do cool guy 3d stuff have you not seen my 3d work no i've never seen your 3d work actually i've like neither no i've like renders my 3d tyrannosaurus like fucking biting in people and stuff like that can you make a 3d tyrannosaurus eat me yeah yeah it's gonna be calm in it the render time yeah you're coming in it wait what did you say you're fucking the tyrannosaurus and it's like no i didn't remember this to happen i render it out send it to you guys step tyrannosaurus why don't it's like i said i'm humming to it i'm like oh that makes it it's like i did a lot of render time for this i already rendered

i was just singing to it eli i heard calming not humming oh my god hmm betty gets either way right yeah oh there's not supposed to be a step rex step rex step rex why are you eating batty this is why we shouldn't ever film a podcast again every time why do we keep doing this every week kitt kittles and cum. Like, what the fuck? They're on track for video game. They're doing, oh, oh.

This company wants to sponsor your podcast. That's going to be the first, like, real sponsorship we get for the podcast. In the context, you cannot talk about dick or cum 10 minutes before or 10 minutes after the spot. It's like the meme with the kid with the red face and the veins are popping out. Unsubscribe. Unsubscribe. Unsubscribe. Unsubscribe.

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Unsubscribe. Unsubscribe. Unsubscribe. Unsubscribe. Oh no! These are fucking wretched. Yeah, guys, don't drink bang this. These are the worst drinks I've ever had. We've been through like four White Claws by now apiece. I don't want to. I can't finish one. I opened a second to see if it was better. I kind of finished one.

I'm still like a quarter. I'm literally like halfway through this and I'm like, this is a lot of sugar. It's just so sweet. They need way more alcohol if you're going to make it this sweet. Like, it's a lot of sugar it's just so sweet they need way more alcohol if you're gonna make it this sweet like it's not worth it drink cum I'd rather drink

semen we just lost another spot you guys couldn't go 10 minutes without saying cum could you we need a word for cum we have grape I think cum's fine. Don't take this from me, okay?

I want some scrum and some kittles. I don't want kittles. I don't want kittles. Double canceled. Double canceled. No, no. I don't want to drink this one now. You know what reminds me of Scrum Kittles.

Purple Kittles. So the Matrix. That's so bad. You guys seen the Matrix trailer? Oh, man. And then we had MTG written down. I don't know. Okay, first up.

What is this? So, okay. You have a rock just in the middle. People are going to be like, wait, what? This is more than just a rock. Okay, okay. I told Cody about this when you were setting things up so uh one of my viewers uh jk hunter actually made the cool little care package for all of us hell yeah dude he gave me a nintendo 64

and his a bunch of games oh i got a rock i'm kidding okay so it's not just a rock so if you're if you're listening fuck you uh if you're watching on the screen you'll see a little rock in a glass case right now it is actually a piece of dracula's castle from romania where i guess he has family and when he brought home a giant brick of it because they used to apparently part of it collapsed and they used to just sell that shit as like a souvenir you'd buy a piece of the castle before it became super illegal to do that when he brought it home it broke and he gave me a little piece of it and put it in this little fucking case like a cross and shit on it and it's gonna be part of the dnd room because that's spooky dude that's fucking gangster that's super fucking cool so this comes from a dude in kansas that is just hitting rocks in his backyard he made a guy in

kansas is breaking rocks in his backyard and he's like this came from romania i'm joking there's just a dude in kentucky he's like okay that's from dracula's castle that one is from berlin wall no one can verify this shit it's fucking rock we'll put it on a little. Them geologists ain't real. Yeah, ain't no one know this shit. I'll put in a nice box, mark up the price. But it looks super cool. And that's really also super cool because the next big Magic the Gathering set is called Innistrad Midnight Hunt.

And then one after that coming out November is called the Crimson Knight. What is Dracula's name? Huh? What's Dracula's name? Huh? What's Dracula's name? Wait, wait. Come on, this is your rock. What is Dracula's name? No, I just watched the Netflix show.

I know, me too. I'm trying to remember his name. I haven't watched a Netflix show and I know it. It's really good. He really does people dirty. It's like Vladimir something. You got the first one? I know, I know.. It's really good. He really does people dirty. It's like Vladimir something. You got the first one? I know.

I know his first. I can't think. It starts with a T? It starts with a T? Uh-huh. Last name starts with a T. You got Vlad, right? I know his.

I can't. I don't know. I'm not going to just make it up. I don't know. Come on. It's like a dragon name. Hammer. Warhammer. Think of it. War?t tempest tempest you got tempest for dnd

tempest tempest is for dnd tempest is for vlad tempest yeah do you know what made him baller because he impaled people i on fucking sticks yeah vlad the impaler was vlad tapas right up their buttholes yeah literally that's what he did and he practiced on rats in prison he was locked up if you have a kid and it likes killing animals get him checked out because he's probably gonna turn into dracula if you have a kid that's killing animals fucking turn him in period yeah that you should abort them at 30s 360 months my kid's super into torturing animals we gotta take him down drop him off at the fire station drop him off at the fire station sir Sir, your child's 13. Yeah, I was just about to say. Yeah.

Squeal off in your hill cat. All right, John, here's your new home. My kid doesn't torture animals, by the way. I'm throwing that out there. If your kid does torture animals, leave him at the fire station. Sir, he's 13. Yeah, and he's irresponsible. Burn! Like his dad! animals leave him at the fire station sir he's 13 yeah and he's irresponsible i can see you when you're all grown up can't wait for buds i'm out oh god damn it magic the guy yeah the new set in this rod there's a set that comes out today

actually i'm drafting as soon as we're done here i'm going to be part of a draft for commander you are so nerd dude i love this shit what do you mean now i've always been a giant nerd it's mtv but you never played edh until recently no yeah i i so i had played standard regular magic a little bit like a tiny bit back in like 2003 or some shit forever ago expensive format yes empty sorry mtg is way more expensive than edh edh yes you can spend a fuck ton commander commander because you need one of every card and standard you need four yeah four of every card and you don't need four of every card but if you want to be competitive yeah you have to spend it's like i remember when uh frex is a debt dealer or something like that came out so your decks are like thousands of dollars shit per 60 cards 60 card yeah yeah and that's like one and then you have like multiple decks

to be competitive and they people take it fucking serious as fuck where edh is not as it's competitive scene but not as competitive it's not as widely played edh is not as it's competitive scene but not as competitive it's not as widely played yeah and you'll spend a couple grand i didn't realize like i told you my prosh deck i was like oh shit i got like process skywriter yeah how much is mana crypt and mana vault depends on what's printing there's some that are like oh i got the glory uh expensive mana crypt expensive yes 500 ish there you go 100 bucks we need like four of them oh no so i have but wait mana vault is expensive what is it lori let me see we're looking at price oh these are wait no mana mana vault what is it 500 yeah mana crypt if you have one of the old ones they're still only around 100 or so but yeah yeah but you like that's

one card of fucking 100 like i didn't realize how much mine were i was like get a beta edition of mana of All is around $9,000. $300. I have the $300 one. But still, for cards that are staples in the good shit. Dude, that Phyrexian Altar I sent you? Yeah. So around $80 on the newer printings like the scene was it phyrexian

altar or what mtg is phyrexian altar i think use tcg that's that's what i i live off of tcg now oh my god so while you're looking that up i just placed an order for like 150 individual cards um and because they're so like a bunch of them are really obscure weird cards because there are I just placed an order for like 150 individual cards. And because there are so, like a bunch of them are really obscure weird cards because there are so many cards. Normally on TCG, this website where you can buy magic cards, there's a button that optimizes your cart

and it will put everything, all these cards from, they'll try to find like similar sellers. So you get like 50 cards from one store, 30 from another, and it tries to, so you get less packages. It couldn't optimize my order

so I have like 54 individual packages coming with like 150 cards. So my USPS man, because they always come USPS, this dude is going to kill himself. There's zero chance. He's like this dude's got 30 packages today. What does he do?

Yeah, and I'm building a mono blue deck now just one color blue wizards and artifacts and i'm so excited i fucking love this shit like all my cards were worth like that's 70 dollars yeah like i forgot because i was like oh i'll just going through my decks because i finally found all my decks i was like oh just bring it no i didn't why wouldn't you bring it you knew you were coming over do my brain have you met me yeah you're an idiot yes i am too we're all dumb welcome to the unsubscribe podcast our brains don't work we are smart people no because we drink fucking bang mixes fucking stupid but yeah new commander sets come out or not new

commander so sorry new mtg set dropped today then there's another innistrad like it's a two-part so there's midnight hunt and then the next innistrad i believe is crimson day crimson dawn laurie yeah crimson something and it looks super cool and it's all about like vampires and spooky shit we're all against the vampire fucking deck those are always terrifying goes with your vampire rock dragula's castle boom have you ever had an infect deck no i know um but i have blight still colossus in my animar deck because i can basically get them out for free and then he just one punches a player like so in fact infect decks and magic is like a way to kill players 20 11 11 oh yeah if you affect it for 11 normally you have 40 health

and magic so you have to whittle somebody from from 40 and commander from 40 down to 0 to knock them out. If you give them 11 or 10 points of infect damage, they just lose. Because it's harder to give somebody infect that kind of damage. What does that mean, infect damage? It's like poison. Every round they lose life?

No, certain creatures will do poison damage and people can build decks around that. I forgot my Prosh is also in fact. You're a piece of shit. You are just the worst. That Prosh is the worst. I want to see your deck.

Eli, show me your deck. I will. We're just coming to play. I won't even show you until we'll play. And then you're like, this is garbage. I mean, my deck's kind of a piece of shit, too. That's how it should be played, is you want those garbage decks literally obliterate i have my dwarf deck which is a tribal deck which is it's one of those tribal means it's one of it's based around only

like dwarves like a dwarf tribal or dragon tribal wizard tribe they're not competitive yeah usually what about goblin decks that's what i used to play absolutely you can do there are so many good goblin cards right now i love holy i love playing goblin decks and classic red dude oh yeah red goblin goblin bomb and like just like literally in my i have goblin shoot sharpshooter goblin bomb i have those in my prosh deck because you get to target players with sacrificing um your creatures which are permanents now you can do and then my when prash comes in he just fucking adds a shit ton of all my cards add a fuck ton of creatures it's like oh when you put this card in depending on how many creatures you sacrifice this round this how many creatures come into this round so i'm like cool i sacrificed 14 creatures and i

put in 16 creatures that are three threes now with stample jesus and you're like oh no yeah trample don't know eli's deck's getting out of control really quickly boardway yeah boardway dude we could build you oh don't know i want a goblin deck just tell me what i need i want to play i'll send you uh deglas can we we start all this off? Because a couple podcasts. You're really the second podcast. We were talking about you buying magic cards. Yeah, because I bought some,

and you guys were like, well, I want to get back into magic. That one. Then you met that one. That one. Little fucking magic minion over there. Don't do it. I'm going to do the strawberry one.

They're not good. Do you want some non-sugary stuff? Don't do it. I'm going to do the strawberry one. They're not good. Do you want some non-sugary stuff? There's white claw in the pantry. I want to try the strawberry one. Okay, try it. And then we're going to throw all these in the garbage. Why am I only pulling out kittles? You pull out of kittles.

Not me. I'm going to try this strawberry blast now no they're all so sugary it's so sugary they're awful white claw now imagine drinking something it's so bad you're like man i miss white claw this is like when you're like i want a red bull with sugar no this is not this is so much worse than red bull this is awful yeah fucking awful this is my least favorite drink i've ever tried i i this makes me miss old for loco like old for loco would kill you oh yeah kill you and this is, that first summer that it released, it killed like 17 college kids.

Yeah. Because they were just like funneling them and stuff. And their hearts were exploding. Heart failure. It's like, so much alcohol. But energy! I'm drunk and positive at the same time. Overdose on taurine.

Can we try to find does anyone who's listening have old four loco oh we could probably find some on ebay if not guys if you have old four loco send them to us without like fentanyl in them or something you know or maybe just like a little bit just not like a not a lot of fentanyl like a tiny bit of

we're gonna fuck no don't probably have fentanyl in them just yeah you might as well do we do the next episode on delta eight i just got a package of delta eight gummies from uh john burke's place the um oh shit what's it called delta eight i was asking about it in the group text yeah delta eight gummies he sent me some delta eight gummies that and it says on the package only take half if you're trying it for the first time and i'm like there's no thc in this dude delta eight gummies that and it says on the package only take half if you're trying it for the first time and i'm like there's no thc in this do delta eight gummies really like they really like get you yeah a little higher did you do one no i haven't done one yet dude don't do

you said they were 200 no because he said the gummies are 250 is it 250 or the back do a handful 50 no i'm pretty sure it said every single one is like 250 do delta it's that powerful do all of them at one time let's not do that john at home right now like oh bad guy candy in the middle oh you get home and john's like floating in the middle of the room he's just like a balloon john get down john you're you're in the second floor right now floating he's an omnipotent being hello father

hello father my homework is complete father where's my computer now you die that's his vision your vision he's just on the ground just laying there drooling John you good you good I kicked him a couple times that's his vision your vision he's just on the ground just laying there drooling all right let's go film a podcast father where's my computer at

dude i need chicken nuggets it's completely different conversations going down i'm getting chicken nuggets after this i want i want to be like so bad. Delta 8, I'm going to just say, I'm going to warn you. I'm going to be like, yo, do like Delta 8 is supposed to do half the dosage of your normal THC. Like a gummy, like 5 or 10 of THC. So you would do like 15 to 20 Delta 8. 250. That's like me introducing you into drinking alcohol i'm like donut okay so this is a one shot is 40 alcohol and you'll feel it so do 10 of these here's the bottle good luck

yeah and you're just like okay i'll trust it like i think we should do that on the podcast, but only donut. And he has to eat like four at once. And we just watch. I'm down. Do we not edibles with Delta? Do we do? Okay.

That's the comment. Do we do Delta eight next month? It's going to be the quietest podcast of all time. None of us do this. I'm just going to be like quietest podcast of all time. We're just staring. None of us do this. I'm just going to be nervous. I'm like, I'm just eating chicken nuggets. We're going to need so many chicken nuggets. I haven't done any type of drug or anything.

Bro, none of us do. Ever. What's Delta A? A lot of people may not know what Delta A is. Delta A. I just learned what it was like a month ago. So it is the legal form of THC.

So you have CBD, which is completely legal. You have THC, which is apparently like Delta 9. So it's that, however the molecules go. It's got an atom or two in there. It's taking one away. THC is the weeds. Yeah, the weeds. And then it's taking it away

so it's a legal form of that. So it's a one away it's the weeds yeah the weeds and then it's taking it away so it's a legal form of that so it's a delta 8 variant and then you can sell that everywhere in the united states it's legal to consume it's like your booze oh if i have a stroke we'll get it on camera bro we've been waiting to get canceled that would that would be a baddie has a stroke at 20 minute mark and we're like we got fucking 40 more minutes to go yeah we can't call the ambulance now no ambu for you baddie i'm my god i i want to watch oh god i'm gonna next podcast gonna be wild yeah it's gonna be boring yeah we'll see we'll make up a competition we have to play um delta is that on delta eight We have to play Delta. Finished it. On Delta 8, we have to play.

With each other? Red card. Yes. Oh, my. Red flag. Red flags. We need to play red flags with donut. Mm-hmm.

Yes. Dude, they're so bad. These are. I like watching people's faces when they drink them. Guys, if you're looking to drink something, this should be at the bottom of your fucking bang mix maybe with vodka because that no like a lot of vodka yeah if you did our normal pours of vodka this would a cup of vodka yeah like a splash you're like man that actually tastes good now it's nice it killed everything i like it okay baddie are we done yeah we're done i don't want to be here anymore

i don't want to i don't want to even look at this bang guys i'm sorry this podcast sucks it's because it's bang mixes fault it was real go give it a try if you want. Don't. Just don't, actually. It tastes just like sugar. But there's no sugar in it, which is... No. Like, why is it... Why would you name it Kittles? I fucking thought Kittles was a good name. We got purple Kittles, pink babies.

It sounds like it's directed at kids, but it's alcohol? No, there's a guy sitting at home who loves our podcast and he the guy that named it kittles somebody's just like they're they're banging headquarters right now and they're like who thought kittles was a good idea did nobody think of no one think of this? No one think of this? Let's name it Skriddles. Koodles? I can think of any name that starts with other than Kiddles. Piddles. Piddles.

Well, okay. Maybe not. Okay. I like Piddles. Is it lemon? What? This is my favorite drink, Pink Babies. I love drinking Pink Babies. I'm just smortion.

Yeah. Guys, have you tried the flavor cum? It's fucking delicious. And with that, thank you for watching. Thank you. Subscribe. For watching the subscribe podcast. We're going to start calling our podcast canceled.

Whoa, what's the name of this podcast? Oh, yeah, Batty. This is your doing. The name of today is don't drink bang mix or purple kittles with a child that's front the giving it just a purple just a kid with we'll just photoshop purple i feel like thumbsing up the name of this episode is absolutely purple kittles i was going with cum cave orgies but yeah that sounds okay yeah either or i feel like we've already done the cum episode did we i think we have one purple kittles what are we doing kittles purple kittles

we're not doing we're not doing purple kittles name of the last butterfly vinegar strokes people are like have you checked this episode out? What's it called? Purple Kittle. Our episodes have no science behind it. Then there's the episode like KCS Ball.

Our episodes have no relativity. Pokemon Rape. No, it's Machamp grape oh yeah Machamp grape go away everybody

Eli double tap batty shrooms don't operate her fuck off mwah