Unsubscribe Podcast - 38 - Shot Show Hangover ft. Brandon Herrera & Garand Thumb's Play Button

Episode Date: January 27, 2022

Unsubscribe Ep38 - Shot Show Hangover Ft. @Brandon Herrera and @Garand Thumb Play Button THIS IS ALL THAT WE MANAGED TO FILM AT SHOT SHOW, WE PLANNED FILMING LIKE 8 PODCASTS BUT WE GOT TOO DRUNK. OOPS.... SO YOU JUST GET @Brandon Herrera AGAIN ALSO WE STOLE @Garand Thumb PLAY BUTTON BECAUSE HE IS TOO FANCY FOR OUR PODCAST. aka we got drunk and didnt ask him. ------------------------------ WHERE TO LISTEN Spotify https://spoti.fi/2Ye8YOU Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/3cbqY4k Amazon https://amzn.to/2YbzQia Google Play https://bit.ly/2YcWmaD Stitcher https://bit.ly/3cbnY8o ------------------------------ Follow the Cast of Unsubscribe -Baddie- @Baddie Streams https://www.twitch.tv/baddie https://twitter.com/BaddieStreams https://www.instagram.com/baddiestreams/ https://www.youtube.com/baddiestreams -DonutOperator- @Donut Operator @Donut Vlogerator https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwkm_Wcyh0pc7UUmZZfL-6w https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator/ https://www.twitch.tv/DonutOperator https://twitter.com/DonutOperator -Eli_Doubletap- @Eli Doubletap https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://www.twitch.tv/Eli_Doubletap https://twitter.com/Eli_Doubletap https://www.youtube.com/c/EliDoubletap ------------------------------ Edited by Fluck https://www.twitch.tv/fluck Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Oh clap. What's going to love this episode? He's going to be fucking furious. Just hold this. Everyone's audio is still good. We're not bad. What can I do something? What?
Starting point is 00:00:17 Well, one can grabbing where we'll fuck this up. Just do not touch this white button right there. The little dongle. The thing that unclogs everything. How did you accidentally do that? Because I picked up the mic. Ready? Oh. Say hi to Eli.
Starting point is 00:00:36 He's racially ambiguous and batty. That guy's fucking ridiculous and donut. That's harder to rhyme but he's a really nice guy. Welcome to Unsubscribe. Hi, everyone. Unsubscribe podcast here.
Starting point is 00:00:53 We're with Batty, Donut, and Eli Double Tap. Remember to like, subscribe, and comment below because we always forget to do this. So we're adding like like a five second segment yeah wherever you're listening whether it's on amazon google apple podbean castro or that other place uh make sure you rate it do a rating of not four stars or three stars the highest number all of the stars like mario i didn't know we're on amazon we are that's cool are we yeah video no uh the podcast hit me with a donut hit me hi everyone welcome to the unsubscribed podcast i am donut of course i am here with eli double fap brandon berberba and uh batty streams
Starting point is 00:01:43 batty beams also uh we're we're here with Grand Thumb. Big chat. Mike, I know your schedule has been keeping. It's a busy schedule today, Mike. You know what I love having him in studio? What I love about having him here is he's very insightful. His conversation really, really makes you think.
Starting point is 00:02:00 It's the deepest stuff I've ever heard. He's been going hard, too. It's just great he had time for us today. I just want to congratulate him, honestly, on all he's achieved recently. A million subs. He is past you, right? Barely. Barely.
Starting point is 00:02:19 I still have time to overtake him before two million. I was just thinking it's kind of funny. We're all just sitting here in a hotel room. Mike took too many fucking edibles, and now he's just his play button. It's like, oh. You ever get so high you just become your plaque? Imagine having a plaque.
Starting point is 00:02:39 That poor plaque went through a lot of... You know, two of us don't have to imagine having a plaque. God. Wow. Wait till this podcast has one plaque, silver one. Who's going to keep it? No, I have five plaques.
Starting point is 00:03:03 Don't give me the fucking plaque. Oh, wow. Big pee pee stretch. I have five plaques. Don't give me the fucking plaques. I bring it once a week to the podcast. We have to argue at the car, shut the door so the plaque doesn't hear us argue. Have a good weekend with dad. Plagg, call me if you need anything. Daddy, I didn't get money last week. The plaque didn't eat. The plaque says it really just doesn't like spending weekends with you.
Starting point is 00:03:31 You know that? Are you feeding the plaque? Or is that the plaque thinking? You've been listening to Batty too much. This is all our childhood. That's where these jokes come from. My parents got divorced when I was seven.
Starting point is 00:03:47 On the button. Oh yeah, what are we doing today? Hi everyone. Brandon, thanks. Welcome back. Our fourth member. Until I replaced Batty. I mean, yeah, let's be real. Let's be real. Almost did.
Starting point is 00:04:02 Yeah, this episode. So it's Thursday. We came here with the intention of having a lot of podcasts. And we're all leaving. Most of us are leaving tomorrow. And we got Brandon.
Starting point is 00:04:18 Hi, everyone. The guy that's been on many times. We went all the way to Las Vegas with all the coolest gun tubers all the cool industry people stuck with me Like who do we call? Brandon There were so many people you're like, oh you're coming on the podcast right fuck. Yeah. Oh wait. Oh, no, we got hammered Again
Starting point is 00:04:45 Oh Jesus it's been a long way. Let's hear that story though. Yeah hammered. Oops, we got drunk. Again. Oops, I got found in an elevator at 8am. Oh, Jesus, it's been a long week. Let's hear that story, though. Yeah, Batty, let's hear that story. You got found in an elevator? Uh, I thought that was a joke. I drank a lot of vodka Red Bulls, and a lot of Jameson and Gingers, and a lot of shots, and I ended up at the hotel
Starting point is 00:05:01 bar, and they just started, I tipped the guy 20 bucks one time and he just started giving me a circle bar. Yeah. Giving me free drinks. No shit. I gave him a $20 tip cause I just had cash and you were drunk. I was very drunk and he just started giving me free drinks. This is a weird looking $2 bill.
Starting point is 00:05:18 Thank you. That's a 20. I'm not going to say anything. I'm going to feed him more alcohol for tips. The drinks at circle bar cost 20 bucks a piece anyway, so that's fucking crazy It's I literally don't remember. I just know I couldn't Lori called me this morning I couldn't get out of the elevator in meantime like you actually just gave him your card So that was my first day.
Starting point is 00:05:47 How? I was in bed till 3.30pm the next day. His tab is still open and people are ringing it up as we speak. Yeah, the ginger. The big ginger is on his. So, Kyle, how did you run up
Starting point is 00:06:01 $30,000 on your credit card bill? I have a credit card, thank God. Kyle, how's everyone liking Shot Show? God, I am so tired. This is going to be the lowest energy podcast, I think. I'll try to spice it up. If you guys didn't know, Shot Show started Monday, and we've been going at it every night, and it's Thursday,
Starting point is 00:06:21 and we're in our 30s except for Brandon. He might as well be. Look at him. Might as well be. And we're in our thirties except for Brandon. He might as well be looking at him. Might as well be. And we're speed running life. Yeah. It's speed running age. That Russian was packed with. What was that?
Starting point is 00:06:36 The whole thing. Like we said the other day, my blood hurts. So true. And I took a night off and I'm still hurting. Like, fuck. It's my tinnitus just kicked in.
Starting point is 00:06:49 Like the ringing just started in my ear. My God. Right after I said, I'm 30. This is awesome. It sounds like we're a hundred. Oh, this is,
Starting point is 00:06:57 this is terrible. But the food has been amazing. It's great. The drinks have been plentiful out $40 apiece Just baby bird and booze into our mouth all night That was wild Sorry There's so much ging Vitis on this.
Starting point is 00:07:27 Mike Dundee got the **** on that. The Ginger Vitis! Is **** not allowed? We don't know. We can't get it flagged. But we just say it. Really? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:36 So we call it Ginger Vitis now. Since we had ARAB on, oh did you guys know this? Since we had ARAB on, our videos get demonetized. Every single one. Every one. We have to put them through manual review now. Before going up. It's almost like you had a guy on the podcast named Arab.
Starting point is 00:07:48 Which you figured would be better. It's his fucking name. Yeah, exactly. Well, it's not his name. You would think YouTube would be like I don't think it's his name. Has anyone seen his ID or was he fucking with us? Is that actually his name? What? Arab? No, that's not his actual name.
Starting point is 00:08:04 I don't want to say his actual name hello mexican yeah ah hello mexican yeah widest name in the world but i don't know if it's public so i'm not going to say it on the podcast but i will tell you john smith it's very funny bro my name is k and that was dumb. It's gonna be like Dakota Smith. No, it's closer. I guess. All right, Fluck, you gotta, don't put this name out there.
Starting point is 00:08:32 It's. Yeah. I just bleep that and then the faces. That's perfect. Cheers. I'm scared if I stop drinking I'll die. Yeah, that's how that scared if i stop drinking i'll die yeah that's how that works yeah like as soon as as soon as the alcohol leaves your bloodstream the combined hangover
Starting point is 00:08:52 the archer thing i'm just afraid if i quit right now i the collective hangover would kill me so i've heard you do that a couple times now and every time it's brandon has some good voices he really does have a fucking talented voices i wouldn't say talented but it's mean so me and my brothers used to like go back and forth on that shit all the time and just like make up you have brothers i do how many uh nine nine why did you know i have two no i have two i was like eli's got like 14 so. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:26 I thought you were about to do the Goodwill hunting thing. Maki, Mok, Tom, Tom, now. Maki, Mok, Tom, Tom. James, John, James. God damn dude. Like are you fucking with me? It's like no. Is there a bottle of Tito's on the table?
Starting point is 00:09:35 Yeah. Yeah we have that. We can pour in our. Because we only have one white claw a piece. So if we pour the Tito's in the white claw we'll call them. We should. Man claws. Man claws.
Starting point is 00:09:43 Man claws. Man claws. Man claws. Man claws. Man claws. Man claws. Yeah, we have that we can we only in our one white claw piece So if we pour the Tito's in the white claw, we'll call them should man claws man claws and claws And claw just make an off-brand fucking seltzer company name man Going for it. I mean what the fuck else are we gonna do? All right, how's your guys shot shows been? You talking to the audience or us? Can Shotshow's been... You talking to the audience or us? Nobody cares about the audience. I don't think they can talk back. If you were at Shotshow, let us know how it was.
Starting point is 00:10:13 Oh, God. Engagement question of the day. Did you go to Shotshow? And if you did, did you enjoy it? Fluck also bleep out Shotshow. No, I'm joking. What the fuck are we doing here? I don't know what we're doing here, man.
Starting point is 00:10:31 We're in a hotel room drinking. Hungover. I don't know. Guess what we have tonight, though. Black rifle coffee party. Oh, the turncoat cuck party. Right, yeah. So excited.
Starting point is 00:10:45 It's so weird how nobody said anything to us this whole time this weekend. Oh, the turncoat cuck party. Right, yeah. Dude, so excited. So excited. It's so weird how nobody said anything to us this whole time this weekend. It's so weird how when you are actually in person with somebody, they feel a lot less brave. It's almost like you're a bunch of pussies. Pussies are people who are not relevant enough to be here. Ooh. Ooh. God damn, this is one of those episodes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:05 Fuck you all. Y'all suck dick. I didn't mean you guys. I meant the hypothetical. No fucking morons. What if you're talking to the wrong camera right now? I'm fuck. Don't fuck me up like that.
Starting point is 00:11:17 I was like, which camera is that? Okay. He is like, bam. I got that. Bam. You got that.
Starting point is 00:11:22 Bam. We got the right one. Grant them. Are you having a good shot show? Yeah, I feel that. Bam, you got that. Bam, we got the right one. Grant, are you having a good shot show? Yeah, I feel it. Dude, that comedy right there. God, I love it. Great guy.
Starting point is 00:11:35 Fluck, make sure you punch it when he talks. Just really zoom in on that. We just want everybody to understand how much we love having Mike Grant on the podcast. Super awesome to take time out of his super busy schedule of doing important things. Speaking of which, did he for real leave already or do we steal that? Oh, I don't know. I don't know where he is. Yeah, does anyone know where Mike
Starting point is 00:11:56 is? We have his plaque. For everyone who doesn't know what's going on who's just listening. We have Grantham's 1 million subscriber golden play button on the couch with us. And that's ours now, I think. Is that stained on there? We were drinking shots out of it.
Starting point is 00:12:14 Is that a stain? We had sex on it. I came on it. My balls were on it. We all mushroom stamped it individually. Oh my god, that makes me really good. It was like a Power Rangers thing. Our powers combined! And we can we can gingivitis yeah we can give mike an std we should mushroom stamp it if we all dipped
Starting point is 00:12:35 our dick in vaseline squatted down on it it would leave a nice little we've been on the show floor for how many hours we don't need vaseline to mushroom. We got cheese going. The Dick cheese is real right now. Nut butter. We're just turning nut butter. All right. All right. Mike, sorry. Say that again. We're turning up butter on your plaque. Now I guess it sounds like we're jizzing on it. Speaking of are we coming on his plaque? Is that already? No, you didn't already jizzing on it. Are we coming on his plaque? Come! There it is! First come of the day.
Starting point is 00:13:08 No, you didn't. I already said I came on it. You said past tense, though. I already jacked off on Mike's second million play button. Eli, you're joking or not? He's had it in bed with him all night. They cancelled the AVNs. I really wanted to go to that. During SHOT Show, there's also two other events. events there's concrete world yeah which is like a concrete convention lamest
Starting point is 00:13:30 amusement park ever that's what it's called i don't know i heard people talking about at the airport they're like yeah we're heading to concrete world in vegas and the guy's like oh we're going for shots they're like i just like, I just like a shot show. Come to Concrete World. We have a bouncy castle. The tea spinning? That's what it's called here. Everything's concrete, right? It's just a concrete convention?
Starting point is 00:13:56 It's a convention about concrete. I can't think of something more fucking boring. Dude, the shot show. So yeah, Concrete World, Shot Show, and then of course there's always the AVM, the adult video. Right. Award. I can't say what?
Starting point is 00:14:14 I was going to say the P word. Oh, you can't say that? The adult movie. The orange YouTube. The corn tub. The corn tubs. Spicy YouTube. The corn tub. The corn tubs. Spicy YouTube. The reason why you panic anytime somebody goes to your browser
Starting point is 00:14:30 and types in P. Yes. Or T. Or A. You guys are some basic ass searchers. It's like John searches through his own. I'm a poop lady. Jesus Christ. searchers it's like john search history we were we were talking about with page earlier it's like the funniest thing is
Starting point is 00:14:55 like they canceled it because they were worried about gingivitis but it's like that's the disease you're worried about in that industry gingivitis will you take yeah here i'll give you a clean one right here gingivitis that's gonna be my new text tone every time put that word ginger say it again do it again do the thing shit i vodka. This is how we beat the algorithm. The algorithm's gonna beat us. That's wild, because I see some fucked up shit in my videos. Yeah, but you're already flagged. You got on trending recently. You were on trending. I was on trending for gaming on a video that had nothing to do with gaming at all.
Starting point is 00:15:39 Really? Not even a little bit. Don't say it too loud. They'll hear you. Yeah. They're always watching. How did you get training on gaming? Dude, I wish I could tell you. I have no idea.
Starting point is 00:15:49 But I got to, like, number six on gaming. What video was it? I can't fucking remember. Delance, please help me out. Do you remember what that was? Yeah, it was just, like, a random gun meme review. Were video games in the guns? No.
Starting point is 00:16:01 It was, like, it had nothing to do with anything. Did you say call of duty well well my shooting videos get on gaming trending sometimes too probably because they think like the algorithm thinks it's like a pov fucking video game in reality somebody's the algorithm's so good it thinks it's fucking yeah an actual video game wow these are fucking great i did it four or five times last year i was on youtube or a game there's vodka It thinks it's fucking yeah an actual video game wow these are Fucking great. I did it four or five times last year. I was on YouTube or a game. I was fucking that damage right Yeah, I did it's a bite now When you're so gaming, I think that's weird
Starting point is 00:16:37 I'm not complaining. I mean no what's funny is it's always the videos that do like shit You ever notice that mm-hmm like they're not like the videos that are taking off or anything it's not like my fucking eight billion view videos it's always like it's like oh this video is doing marginally worse than everything else oh and now it's on trending cool like and it's now it's doing good does it take off after that no it's just trending doesn't matter it's just like yo you're trending like where are the views at then i feel like you have to be on the first like five on trending for that to actually matter. Yeah. Because then, like, because most people don't, like, go to trending and then start scrolling through, you know?
Starting point is 00:17:12 Wait, there's a thing. Trending? I'm so bad at YouTube. God damn it. I don't look at it either. What sucks about trending is it doesn't act. It's not actually trending. It's handpicked shit that youtube puts on there because it used to be when
Starting point is 00:17:25 youtube was first started it was actual videos that were trending that day yeah but now it's like you'll look at it it's like uh pop artists it's corporate it's corporate shit it's corporate it's all hand trailers all sorts of stuff that they pay youtube to get on trending it's all hand-picked wait can we pay youtube to get on trending well that's what i was gonna say like it's we pay YouTube to get on trending? Well, that's what I was going to say. It's not all handpicked because there is no fucking way they watch our content and go like that. That shit right there. Let's push that to millions of people. It's a robot.
Starting point is 00:17:53 It's a bad AI. It's like this is video game here. And is this please the corporations? I have one purpose. It's like that robot that was like, what is my purpose? My purpose is this. We got to talk about that.
Starting point is 00:18:09 We got to talk about that. You have to please corporations. Oh, my God. I come up to these motherfuckers at lunch today, and they're all fucking depressed passing around a phone. They're like, you can kind of see this fucking robot, man. Yeah, the guys didn't know about this. I was just like wait you've none of you have heard of this and that made me so it was like i masturbate to that i was like that's weird so then very weird i told the guys i was like what's it do and it just scoops they
Starting point is 00:18:38 built this a japanese artist built this piece of art And it's a hydraulic robot that leaks slowly. It's hydraulically fluid. And then it will have a... And then it would do a dance. It was programmed to dance to entertain the audience. It's like a little wiggle dance. Yeah. And then it starts...
Starting point is 00:18:56 Scooping its blood back. So it's got like a big squeegee kind of thing on the front of it. And it just pushes its oil that's slowly leaking out the base on like a slight incline so the oil is always leaking away the fluid and it just does a little dance and it goes down and it just starts pulling its fucking blood back in
Starting point is 00:19:15 and it did it for two years and then it finally hit a point where it couldn't dance anymore it's only programmed was save itself and it needed all that hydraulic fluid. So it stopped dancing. People just watching it just like, fuck,
Starting point is 00:19:32 fuck, I wish I had a voice. Dude, it did have a voice. It was running out of fluid and you can hear the joints screeching. The gears were just clanking. That is the saddest shit I've ever seen.
Starting point is 00:19:47 Eli, do you remember the day that you stopped dancing? The day my son was born. Oh God. Oh God. All right guys, if we didn't tell you already, we've been drinking for four days now. Excessively. Excessively. Excessively. Excessively. Well.
Starting point is 00:20:06 Daddy needs a pickup. An IV. No, come on. You guys, if you watch my vlogs, you've probably seen Josh. You've probably seen Josh. You're super out of focus. Lean back. Don't disrespect Mike like that.
Starting point is 00:20:25 Mike, you're going on the floor. If you guys... Mike is going to spend the rest of the episode staring at Cody's dick. Okay. I went to Bud's SEAL school with my boy here. He brought
Starting point is 00:20:40 some things to make me feel better. IV bags. Because we both quit seal school around the same time you both skyrim quit yeah oh first off we didn't know this and so this is actually a good nerd topic since this is a gaming podcast oh yeah we um not a gaming podcast so let's rewind uh donut quit seal school because skyrim was coming out there's probably i'm missing some stuff but i like that part of the story no no yeah i was i was fucked up really bad and because of skyrim he was heartbroken yeah he's he saw me fall 30 feet onto my back off of an obstacle course and then he was testing the cat theory. But the next day...
Starting point is 00:21:25 Don't it's like a cat. This was a huge deciding factor. I saw Squirt do this like a hundred times. One of the biggest deciding factors in me leaving Sil School was Elder Scrolls Skyrim was coming out the next day, 11-11-11. I was like, I don't want to do this anymore.
Starting point is 00:21:41 I'm just going to go play Skyrim. I don't feel good. Did you say it when you rung the bell? Skyrim! Skyrim! Joe could ring the bell. Boos! Yeah, yeah. Boos!
Starting point is 00:21:56 Was it worth it, though? Skyrim was awesome. Yes. That's one of my favorite Cody's donut stories. And clearly, your life has taken a very, very downward spiral since then. And we haven't talked about it on the podcast yet, but if you guys know who Mr. Ballin is, Strange, Dark, Mysterious, two times a week in story format.
Starting point is 00:22:17 We were in Navy SEAL school with him. Strange, Dark, Mysterious. I thought you were going with somebody else. Oh, no, I was going to start with Chocolate, obviously. Yeah, of course. Strange, Dark, and Mysterious. I thought you were going with somebody else. Oh, no, I was going to start with chocolate, obviously. Yeah, of course. Strange, dark, and mysterious. What the fuck? What?
Starting point is 00:22:31 Mr. Ballin or what? The needles. What? What are you looking... This is the first time I've done this, right? Oh, yeah. Cody's getting a little bit of a liquid. Dude, oh my God.
Starting point is 00:22:40 Dude, there's going to be so much blood everywhere. One of the most terrifying things I've done was we had, I'm not making his name up, Leroy Jenkins. Leroy. He is a, oh, thank you. Pass those over there. So Leroy, when this was third or fourth time hanging out with Matt we went down they were and then Leroy
Starting point is 00:23:07 was on the podcast years ago and Leroy was like oh give me an IV yeah I've done this because he was a medic for the Rangers and I was like yeah and he's like okay ready I'm going to lay down and you're going to give me a neck IV and I was like what the fuck that's a different game
Starting point is 00:23:22 I was immediately like why I poked myself in the arm a what the fuck that's a different game i was immediately like i poked myself in the arm a couple times but yes that's a different game i was like bro why why can't i go through your arm he's like because i don't want that this is for film i was like i'm 11 bravo so um i did a class that i got certified to air quote certified in one day they're like you're good you can save lives it's like the reverse of any kind of medical degree that's like the thing so you just find the ribs then you stab the thing and you're good certified like i also got the first aid merit badge in boy scout second class that's really what it is when you're in 11 bravo it's your first aid merit badge like
Starting point is 00:24:01 lifesavers you're good oh and then you have your, like, they choose your fucking, your person that you have to get pricked by to give an IV. And you're like, oh, please don't. I hope my partner is good. And you're like, okay, I've got it. I blew out your vein. Next vein, blew that out. Next vein, blew it out. And your arm's just, like, destroyed.
Starting point is 00:24:24 You're like, uh. You just leak it? Like, I'll do it myself. But what's the thing? Blue that out next thing blew it out in your arms just like destroyed I'll do it myself. What's it? What's I gonna do push-ups later? What's the thing they shove in your chest? Nemo where's like ten needles at one time? Oh? It goes in your sternum yeah, because there's that video on YouTube. Oh, yeah. No, you guys showed it to me. Fuck. Weird.
Starting point is 00:24:48 Also, he probably should speak into the mic. I'm sorry. It goes into your bone and delivers fluids through your sternum. I don't like any of those words you just said. That's terrifying. You've seen that video, right? Oh, yeah. What's it called?
Starting point is 00:25:01 The Fast 10? Fast 1. Or the Fast 1. Oh, it's horrible. The popping sound it makes is fucking horrendous. Because they got that marine on the ground and the dude's got like, he's straddling his face and he's just like, bah! Did you ever give one of those to someone?
Starting point is 00:25:17 What? Why? Yeah. You're an awful person. Somebody was dying? Oh, in retrospect, that's a pretty good reason. That's a lame ass excuse and I hate retrospect, that's a pretty good reason. It's a lame-ass excuse, and I hate it. He's a special operations medic.
Starting point is 00:25:28 Were they dying before you shoved 10 needles in their chest? No, that's what caused it. I had like a nasal pharyngeal is the worst thing I had. Yeah. And it was to go home early for leave on Iraq. They were like, Eli, if you do this nasalopharyngeal, we'll give you two days. You can go home two days early for leave. And I was like, yep, done.
Starting point is 00:25:51 Fucking shove it. Hit me. And then my doc's just like, okay, we're going to hear spit on it. I was like, and he's like, wham. I'm like, yeah, I'll pull it out. Pull it out. It just feels like pressure in your nasal cavity. And then they pull it on you like
Starting point is 00:26:14 Okay, I'm going home now, but I'm gonna at least I'm gonna be hydrated I'm gonna at least take a two-week break from him You're a pro and this is good he's fucking donating blood to the couch I just get a drop on it Dude the fucking nurse is gonna come in here like Oh It is a Friday Wait what Is there a new system that doesn't leak out the blood Yeah it just sits there So you can continue to do it Dude that's fucking dope
Starting point is 00:26:39 I like the squirt gun method You forget to take the tourniquet off, so it just shoots blood across the room every time your heart pumps. Yeah. It's literally what happens. You had the best medics, by the way. Infantry. Again, this is 11 Bravo.
Starting point is 00:26:58 I think it was my bane when the dude who was doing mine, again, one-day class, he didn't pop the tourniquet and my heart's pumping it's like screw it screw it i'm like oh and then the other man yeah i'm the robot i'm like no i'm like scooping him back you got your little squeegee on. We had this doc. He was an ex-Navy corpsman who came over the Army. Dude, the corpsmans are good. Dude, this motherfucker, he was old as shit.
Starting point is 00:27:32 He said you're welcome. Look at you. We give shout out to corpsmans. Dude, absolutely. This dude, he was old as shit. I love you, Doc Banning, but he was old as shit. I love the Hulk. Oh, yeah, it's my favorite DC movie as well. Thank you. Honestly,, but he was old as shit. I love the Hulk. I hate you.
Starting point is 00:27:45 Oh, yeah, it's my favorite DC movie as well. Thank you. Honestly, Eli, he was shorter than you. You want to turn the audio up real quick? I touched my cord. Check, check, check, check, check, check, check. Daddy, one, two, three, four, five. Your good guy, Fluck, is going to have so much fun on this episode.
Starting point is 00:27:58 Yeah, he's going to hate us. Thanks, Fluck. We love you. Fluck, reach out to me via email. We've got some work to discuss. Are you trying to steal our editor? Yeah, for TikTok, yeah. DeLance, I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:28:11 You're getting fired. Yeah. DeLance, you're on the fucking ice. This is the episode DeLance is fired. Featuring Bryn. That's why we had you here. You're going to get a cameo later. We'll cross that bridge when we get there.
Starting point is 00:28:26 Can we talk about this story? Is DeLance... So Brandon, for a long time, was like, you can have all the ad revenue. Oh, God, yeah. Turns out, fantastic idea when you're a fucking nobody.
Starting point is 00:28:42 What happened, DeLance? We had to renegotiate after a certain point. It was like, oh, wow. Yeah, no, neither of us really kind of knew it was going to get here, and this is kind of retarded. I love that story so much. I see DeLance is like, well,
Starting point is 00:28:59 this contract says otherwise. Yeah, and my bank account says otherwise. It's like account says otherwise well cool because I'm opening up a new fucking YouTube account because we're doing I'm starting over oh my god but Delance honestly was we were on the same page it was kind of one of those like yeah this is couldn't have done that
Starting point is 00:29:17 oh no I would have been Brandon Herrera 2 on YouTube you would not have been the real Brandon Herrera anymore well that's what my ID says would not have been the real Brandon Herrera anymore. Well, that's what my ID says. He would have been the faker. That's one of my favorite stories. I was like, oh, Delance is such a nice friend. Fuck you!
Starting point is 00:29:34 Let me talk about these fucking medics! We got medics in the room! Let me talk about Doc Manning. Not the Hulk. Isn't this a video game podcast? Yeah, this is video game related. Sorry we interrupted. You'll like this one, Donut, though. Can I shout them out real quick? Yeah, this is video game related. Okay, sorry we interrupted Matty's boring story. One second.
Starting point is 00:29:46 Can I shout them out real quick? Because they just came and put an IV in me. Josh! Come here, come shout your shit out real quick. If you trip on any cords when you walk over here though, you care. I will fucking slap you. My friend. These guys are shorter than me.
Starting point is 00:30:00 It's shorter than Eli. Combined, they're not even my height. This is a rare thing. Badass moment. Oh my god. They have to stand on each other's shoulders with a trench coat to get into any fight. It's shorter than Eli. Combined? This is a rare thing. That old small man complex is going on over here? Oh, my God. They have to stand on each other's shoulders with a trench coat to get into any parties. It's very odd.
Starting point is 00:30:11 I feel like hot ones. Look at that camera, that camera, that camera. Yes, come here. Come here. Okay. All right. Tell everyone who you are and who you're with. I'm Josh.
Starting point is 00:30:19 I'm the CEO and founder of Special Operations Medic Coalition. I am a special operations medic, and it's a nonprofit for those special operations medics. The way you said that makes me think you've said that multiple times this week. Probably said it just a couple of times. Special operations. You said special operations so many times. Yeah, that's what people want to hear. I mean, yeah, that's fair.
Starting point is 00:30:38 All right. Kill and heal, brother. That's what we do, bud. Hashtag awareness. I just wanted to tell a story about this doc touching everyone's balls, but that's it. It's all gone. You should have led with the ball touching.
Starting point is 00:30:51 You didn't let me. I was right. I said he did, and then you're like blah, blah, blah. I bet in the comments right now, at what time stamp do we get a call from the downstairs for a noise complaint? Sounds like a bunch of dudes laughing and banging upstairs. There's blood everywhere.
Starting point is 00:31:10 There's blood everywhere. There's blood everywhere. Fucking cameras. Like, did we walk in on a fucking snuff film? One of them said hot blood. Getting that hot blood in. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:24 Yeah. Hot blood. getting that hot blood in yeah getting that hot blood in Cody fucking overheats and dies on the podcast like oh yeah what we were pumping into you was like 120 degrees Cody why are you sweating we just perspirated guys I don't feel so good we accidentally boiled Cody
Starting point is 00:31:41 from the inside you know that's how they cook fucking frogs? What? Yeah, when they cook frogs. They put them in cold water. And then slowly turn it on. And then slowly heat up the IV. Again, big shout out to the Special Forces non-profit for killing
Starting point is 00:31:57 Cody. Big shout out to Saab CEO. Hey Brandon, good news. The host lodge has opened up. Beautiful, beautiful. How come when they gave me my IV earlier, it was like a much lower dose and they had to heat up a spoon? You felt great for 45 minutes, though, didn't you? Dude, I woke up in a fucking elevator.
Starting point is 00:32:19 I don't know. It's a nice Bic lighter. I like it. Yeah. It's a nice Bic lighter. Look, when you turn it upside down, it's a naked lady. Well, I don't feel so good. So shot show guys. Oh yeah. Ball story. Go batty. What your ball story? You buy you to tell it. I don't use a boring. So help me God.
Starting point is 00:32:41 I mean, okay. Okay. Navy corpsman, right? Mm-hmm. Bunch of dudes stepped in a mud hole. So how's your shot show been? Guys, guys, I don't want Brandon
Starting point is 00:32:57 on the podcast anymore. One and below if you want Brandon. One and below if you want Brandon on the podcast instead of Batty. Two. Okay,
Starting point is 00:33:06 never mind. We're not doing that. We should see one's popularity. Batty's like, no! Don't defend me! What? What? Alright, what about your balls, Batty? It was just a Navy
Starting point is 00:33:21 corpsman that rubbed fucking cream all over our balls and dicks because we all got stung on the dick and balls by bees. How? Wait, what? You got stung by a bee on your pee-pee? Yeah, like a bunch of us did. It was like ten dudes who got attacked on their dick by mud wasps. Did you have pants on?
Starting point is 00:33:37 Yeah, but... Why was it on... Did you wear underwear when you were in? Or did you go commando and have a button or two down? I always had the buttons up. button or two down I always had the buttons up no did we definitely not
Starting point is 00:33:47 always have the buttons up so you guys like stung exclusively on the cock mostly the thighs
Starting point is 00:33:53 legs and dicks are these like fucking dick seeking hornets or like what mudwad
Starting point is 00:33:59 they live underground and then we stepped on their shit and they just went up pants and shit
Starting point is 00:34:03 kinda like 4chan yeah dick seeking hornets they live underground and they go for cocks and shit. Kind of like 4chan. Yeah. Dick seeking hornets. They live underground and they go for cocks. Is that the name of the episode? Dick seeking hornets? I think so. Dick seeking hornets.
Starting point is 00:34:12 Dick seeking hornets. That's not the indie band name, by the way. I mean, we're already getting reviewed, so. Yeah. True. But yeah, this doc, just out of the blue, just he had the cream ready and he was like attacking men's dicks without even like a second thought. We're like, we love you doc.
Starting point is 00:34:27 And he's just rubbing cream on our dicks. Like that's a doc. I was shout out to medics. I wasn't even. Hey, Dick and bottle experts, man. Yep. That's what it is. Yep.
Starting point is 00:34:35 Dick and bottle experts. Absolutely. And afterward, we'll be doing prostate checks. And they have to like touch each other's buttholes in training. Wait, you had a what? But no, no. Like Josh was telling me this. They got to touch each other's buttholes in training wait you had a what buttholes no no like josh was telling me that they gotta touch each other's buttholes in training what's the best butthole
Starting point is 00:34:50 why was training on a saturday why were you in a hotel room after the bar guys we're training tonight wake up in a stranger's hotel room time for training there's only privates here this is weird sark told me to do this tonight. Wake up at a stranger's hotel room. Alright, time for training. There's only privates here. This is weird.
Starting point is 00:35:07 Sark told me to do this. But you're not even in the military. Contractor. It's okay. It wouldn't be an unsubscribed podcast if something wasn't fucking up. Hey guys, we got all new cameras. Guess what? We're in a hotel room and one died.
Starting point is 00:35:23 Hey guys, we had Tim Kennedy on. What happened? One died. Hey, we had Matt on. What happened? The audio didn't work. We are very good at podcasting. There is no reason we should be succeeding.
Starting point is 00:35:35 Danny's fucked up too. Something happened. Did Danny's fuck up? Oh, the audio missed because the fucking files. Well, I can think of. Oh, no, Danny. The Danny one, because we normally record four audio tracks,
Starting point is 00:35:48 all the individual tracks broke, so we only had the one master file, and Fluck was able to save that. Thank you, Fluck. Shout out to Fluck. But I can think of three reasons you guys are succeeding. You know? Eli, Brandon, and Donut.
Starting point is 00:36:03 I was going to say that. I was waiting for the joke aside from Carriker, you guys know that my podcasts do the best it's true, it's true I know I'm a narcissist, I check I did the math I checked I hate it so much
Starting point is 00:36:26 damn it oh it's so good what's your favorite thing about Vegas so far guys what do you like the most and what do you hate the most
Starting point is 00:36:33 I hated that I walked and I looked down and I seen flashing lights I was like oh shit this place has an arcade it was just
Starting point is 00:36:42 fucking casino I was so excited to see flashing led lights it's like an arcade this is amazing it's like why did you go full artistic why did your hands go up that's that's where my son got it it's like an arcade for your alcoholic aunt you're really artistic super artistic brand artistic. Brandon, what about you? What are you enjoying about SHOT Show? I'm enjoying getting to hang out around you guys. We do that every other day in Texas. We didn't need to come to Vegas for that, but I'm glad we're here.
Starting point is 00:37:14 It's been very fun. Just wanted to light a couple hundred dollar bills on fire while we do it. Oh, a hundred. Yeah, like Matt. The whole dabbing his tears with the fucking hundred dollar bills. Him and Angry were going. Dude, that was fucking amazing. We've had so many good, like,
Starting point is 00:37:28 we sat Matt and Angry next to each other, and we need them on the podcast, and we won't even talk. It'll just be those guys going at it. Yeah, don't worry, guys. I'll sit that one out. And then we had... Matt Best and Angry Cops.
Starting point is 00:37:40 When they're... Oh, my God. They're banters. Can't beat it. It's next level. Can't beat it. It is fucking gold and then we had caleb last night at denny's just having a blast dude i was openly weeping come check out
Starting point is 00:37:53 my baseball oh we got baseball bats too would you like some welcome to nanny's yeah we don't care we'll kill you kids yeah we have three syrups too the greatest thing three syrups, too. The greatest thing. Three syrups. His light voice. He was lit, man. That was fun. I couldn't stop fucking laughing. We went to Denny's at 2 a.m., by the way.
Starting point is 00:38:14 Like real men. Like real men. I can taste this IV. What? That's odd. Did you guys have flavor to the IV? Purple. It was a heroin? Oh's odd. Did you guys have flavor to the IV? Purple. It was a heroin?
Starting point is 00:38:27 Oh, fuck! That makes sense. We gave you the chemo. This bag is spicy. You see Donut's hair fall out through the episode. My blood feels sick. My blood is sick. I got a cummy ache. My blood feels sick. My blood is sick. I got a cummy ache.
Starting point is 00:38:48 A cummy ache. Dude, I can't even imagine the audio for this podcast. Rossi and I are just holding our mouth. It's so inconsistent. Oh, yeah. Back in, sorry, Flo. The tromboning, the microphone. Jesus.
Starting point is 00:39:02 Can you fit the entire mic in your mouth yet? I'm the only one on this podcast that can't do that. Okay, first off, I haven't even tried that. Look it, you fit the entire mic in your mouth yet? I'm the only one on this podcast that can't do that. Okay, first off, I haven't even tried that. Look it, you're so close. I'm close but I can't do it. Get it in there. Don't be a bitch. Less teeth. So much teeth. Ow, that hurts. So much teeth.
Starting point is 00:39:18 Yeah. This is why you failed school. That was the determining factor. Too much teeth. Too much teeth, man much teeth man batty was your favorite part of shot yeah me too yeah awesome deep i'll let you know after tonight when maybe things get better oh i know we got one more night and then we get to go home and sleep. I am so excited to go home and sleep. Right.
Starting point is 00:39:47 I'm not streaming tomorrow night. Oh, I was going to, but nope. No. I want to eat Lunchables in my bed. I love Lunchables. What's your favorite Lunchable? Turkey. Turkey and cheddar.
Starting point is 00:39:57 Really? Yes, sir. I love we're highly successful people, and you eat Lunchables in bed. Why the fuck wouldn't you? It's like, oh, I was just DMing Gentila the other day. Nah, I'll take the lunchable though. I'm a fan of the pizza pepperoni though, of course. Dude, I want to see that, like the habits
Starting point is 00:40:15 of highly successful people and they interview us and it fucks their whole book up. They're like, never mind. Exclude that. Like, yeah, we're going to go with Elon Musk. I start my day off with a to go with Elon Musk. Yeah. I start my day off with a mimosa with a shot of vodka. I eat Lunchables in bed till three.
Starting point is 00:40:34 And if the first one doesn't do, I do three more. Then I make dick jokes to a camera and then money comes in. Sometimes. I guess they were joking. That's exactly how our life oh no that does sound like a hyperbolic
Starting point is 00:40:54 they're making this up it's like that's literally what I did I didn't have time to make real food for a while so I just ate Lunchables I mean I'm not surprised by that when we had the snowstorm of 2021 i was just gonna go there oh baddies fucking baddies like i got us guys are we gonna talk about that no dude we just go in he's like no don't worry guys i got everything we're good
Starting point is 00:41:21 it has fucking a crate of gushers Yeah, it's just like a giant fucking Costco box of good. We're gonna put the nail in my cross We might as well do it, right? so Had a blizzard in early February a little before my mean Eli's birthday actually and Cody had no power no water. He was at his house. Oh, yeah. He died with John,
Starting point is 00:41:48 11 year old with his son, John loved John. And Cody was just like sending these texts that are group with me and Eli being like, man, sure. I am cold with my son here. Curled up on the couch in a pile of blankets.
Starting point is 00:42:04 Yeah. What was my, what was my response? I was like, oh, that sucks. It's really warm here. I'm like, oh. Meanwhile, you guys are like, as a crow flies, two miles apart. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:16 Exactly. It's a five-minute drive. No text, no nothing. He's like, man, that sucks. I'm on the grid for the hospital, so I lost no power or anything. Yeah sucks i'm on the uh the grid for the hospital so i lost no power yeah he was on the hospital power grid and i don't invite myself places and i'm like i'm so cold here with my son he's like oh he's like lol that sucks bro to be fair i was on a tinder date cody's too busy streaming bro yeah i was buying a glock oh jesus have fun dying with your kid so we go to
Starting point is 00:42:47 the grocery store and we wait three hours in line oh god you did yep and i made this beautiful roast with potatoes and carrots and a ton of stuff brandon showed up it was the night you moved to texas the night i moved to tex. Like the last three hours of the drive. I'm driving 2,000 miles. Yeah. Last three hours, the roads were completely frozen over. It was wild. And I made this roast for Brandon.
Starting point is 00:43:13 Do you know what Batty got at the grocery store? Like I got meat. I got fucking vegetables. I got rice. I got like tons of stuff. You know what Batty got at the grocery store? Gushers. Batty was-
Starting point is 00:43:24 Free roll-ups. And free roll-ups got at the grocery store? Gushers. Batty was Free roll ups. And free roll ups. He was preparing for his chips. Dip. I think there was some candy in there. Some miscellaneous bags
Starting point is 00:43:33 of like Halloween candy that were left over from last year. You were going to deliver Halloween candy for children is what you prep for. I didn't I didn't have a meal
Starting point is 00:43:41 in like two days. Two and a half days. First thing I had of little juice was trail mix and Gushers What's wrong guys I'm like, I'm ready to go, guys. This blizzard can't beat me. Batty, how have you lived this long? Honestly, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:44:11 I shouldn't be alive. I can't wait for the episode of some fucking medical documentary after like, he should have died 13 years ago. Third host. And stuffed Batty. Here he have some kushers man there's a cockroach mixed with a twinkie it's so weird it's his genetic code somebody needs to make that
Starting point is 00:44:38 code for a ginger somebody needs to make that just like a twinkie with legs and a cockroach face put a little orange beard on it and tattoos all down the just like a Twinkie with legs and a cockroach face. Put a little orange beard on it. And tattoos all down the side of the Twinkie. Pokemon tattoos on the Twinkie. Yeah, Pokemon tattoos and magic cards. Your bag.
Starting point is 00:44:55 You're gonna want that to not fall into the lamp. Is it good? Yeah, we still got a minute. We got a minute. Yeah, the medics did it. They're good. The thing attached to your vein bursts into flames because it's touching the light bulb. Corbin got it, I think. Are we still good?
Starting point is 00:45:12 Magma dropping. The corvus shrugs. He's like, I mean, you're not dead. I'm the one that fucking put it into your veins. He's like, I'll be honest with you, I've never done it before like that. Normally we have like an IV stand because we're not. that's a lie. You've done some fucked up shit Nice little dirt medicine here. I am feeling great already Do you have that can you feel like just that running through you? Yeah, it's quite a lot of ice cold in my arm man that he be back
Starting point is 00:45:47 why is this an heb bag in a walmart bag yeah it's like i don't know it's fine trust us they're okay they're in their room just like it's like we got to make one real quick we're going don't it's gonna it's so, we got to make one real quick. It's so cool. We're going to be on the podcast. Just put it in the fucking HEB bag. Texans love HEB. It's fine. They'll be hyped. Just get some water.
Starting point is 00:46:12 I'd be more impressed if they got an HEB bag around here. Honestly, yeah. He's like, trust me. We were in the Navy 11 years ago. Don't worry. We're fine. When Cody first moved to Vegas, we went on a bit of a tear. I think is the way.
Starting point is 00:46:28 First move to Vegas? Or to Texas. Oh, man. To Texas? Yes. We were both single. We drank a lot. We went on a mighty, mighty fun experience.
Starting point is 00:46:40 There was a lot of white claw. So 2020, you and I went to the... Where's the story going? We went to the IV bar. Thanksgiving of 2020, we went to the IV bar, right? Thanksgiving of 2021, me and Brandon went to the IV bar. Oh, that's true.
Starting point is 00:46:57 We were wondering where the story was going. We're just like, hey bro, remember that time we were fucking hoes? Yeah, exactly. That's exactly what I was thinking. I was like, we went on a tear tinder I was like no no I was talking about the alcohol
Starting point is 00:47:09 I was just watching them dig this grave dig the grave I've been in one since I was born my man I don't need to dig a grave I live in it Jesus just chilling there waiting to die I don't need to dig a grave, I live in it.
Starting point is 00:47:26 Jesus. Just chillin' there, waitin' to die. I'm just ready dude, just start throwin' dirt, let's do this! I got one nut in the grave. One nut in the grave has to be like your new apparel company. Jesus. I got vodka white on my nose. God damn it, this is good. God, Shosho's nose. Oh, god damn it. This is good.
Starting point is 00:47:46 God, Shosho's lame. God. But Ivy Bar is rock. Yeah. I haven't went to one. You've never been to an Ivy Bar? I haven't. No.
Starting point is 00:47:54 We went to the one right by the place we go to. It's so much less sketchy than Navy Corpsman. You don't say. I don't know. I mean, they did a great job. You guys did fucking wonderful. Except for the one bag thing. I got the warm blood now. Don't say No They did a great job. You guys did fun. I got the one got the warm blood now. I Got the hot one. I got a sucked Can we share needles is that allowed?
Starting point is 00:48:19 This is their Yelp for this company. It's the screenshot of this and it's a picture of him standing like that. And it just says, with the fucking party shirts and everything. And it's just like... It's gonna be like, me and Ivy, call us. I was just like,
Starting point is 00:48:43 that's all the Yelp's three pictures for their business profile. I just love how it was like, hey Josh all the yummest three pictures for their business profile. I just love how I was like, hey Josh, I'm good, right? And he went, yeah. The shrug. I mean, you're not dead. Dude, don't worry. We used to do this for a living.
Starting point is 00:48:58 We'll hydrate you. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. Holy shit. We will start your business account for you guys we got this it's just the ig it's just welcome to fake fridays oh no oh my god it's like content, but better. Holy shit, there's the slogan.
Starting point is 00:49:29 It's like content, but better. Content, but good. I'm sorry. I love you guys. Let me watch this. If you're not, but I love you. God, it's like we're doing everything everybody else does but like a little bit better. Now you're handing his mic to you.
Starting point is 00:49:53 Sorry, I got it, I got it, I'm good. You good? Alright. Just hydrate it now. Dude, my energy levels just fucking rose, it's amazing. This is like a new man. Did you guys put Adderall in this too? It's a joke, you two. Dude, you're not supposed to do the same shrug to that. God.
Starting point is 00:50:15 Apparently, to be energized, you just should drink water. You gotta be hydrated. It's so weird. It makes up 70% of your body. I don't think the science is there for that. We need a lot more testing behind that. Wait, hold on. Mike has something to say.
Starting point is 00:50:34 Oh, shit. I never considered that, but... I mean, that's a fair outlook. Does it have to be a Thai chick? Wow. That's insightful. Thanks, Mike. Does it have to be a Thai chick? And we just's insightful. Thanks, Mike. Does it have to be a
Starting point is 00:50:45 Thai chick? And we just add a bleep over what he says next. Dear God. Oh, happy. We're finally able to have Grantham on our podcast.
Starting point is 00:50:56 Cool. Very cool. Thank you. With super high profile. There's literally all the shit you've told me I'm not allowed to say on this podcast and
Starting point is 00:51:03 calm is just all over. Literally all of cover. I wish you guys could see you have come in this Was that you look like a Jackson Pollock painting? No, I Only know who that is from the accountant. I only yet well yeah Also, I'm pretty sure that was a line directly out of Guardians of the Galaxy was it you know what if the AVNs were this
Starting point is 00:51:30 week we could fill my mic up we could fill that up with cum and someone would take a shot out of it how oh god that would be fantastic how quickly do you think you'd get kicked out of the AVNs though if you started walking around with a black light excuse me ma'am ma'am i have a
Starting point is 00:51:45 question it's just flick it on yeah just oh that question answered i think you'll get kicked out faster walking around be like can you fill this up with calm does anybody have some calm please where's peter north i need a tin roper aper? What was the guy's name that we met last year? What's a tin roper? Or not last year, two years ago. What was the guy's name? Eli, what was the guy's name from Bowerbiz a couple years ago at SHOT Show? Bowerbiz?
Starting point is 00:52:14 Whatever the fuck it's called. What's the shitty shit? Burbiz? Burbiz. Bowerbiz? Yeah, I'm illiterate. 24. What was the guy's name?
Starting point is 00:52:24 He had the giant cock from the AVNs and he came over to the event. Oh, shit. The porn guy. Yeah, the porn guy. I don't remember who that was. Slush was there, too. Fuck. Remember the guy with the giant cock?
Starting point is 00:52:41 I don't know. I remember now that you're mentioning that. You say that, but he literally had the porn name. His actual name was like John or... Was it Dick Hammer? I actually think I know who you're talking to or talking about. It was like Dick Hammer or some shit. Shit. Dude, no.
Starting point is 00:52:55 It was like... You were joking, but that was his name. It was like a hardwood or some shit like that. It was some pun, right? Yeah, his name was a literal dick pun. Dude, Dick Hammer's a good porn name. Thor's hammer. No, it's too much Oh, I rather go with dick hammer. Yeah camera. Yeah, it's way more subtle. Yeah This guy about porn he was like this was just my name he had his ID
Starting point is 00:53:22 Oh, that was his actual name and then he was like then I got to porn at like 35 because the name just worked like holy fuck bro nice cock bro great cock Dick Hammer are you present they're a
Starting point is 00:53:41 Richard Hammer just call me dick hey Jason nice cock god this is the least nerdy episode we've ever had this is literally Microsoft bought out Blizzard and Activision 72 billion dollars
Starting point is 00:53:58 Microsoft owns wow now they're gonna fuck it I mean Activision fucked over Blizzard. And then Microsoft bought both of them? Yeah. Was this today? That was like a couple days ago.
Starting point is 00:54:13 Three days ago? Yeah. 72 billion or 78 billion? Yeah, 72. Yeah. A B, not an M. Like, fucking. They dropped some cash on that.
Starting point is 00:54:23 The World of Warcraft is is gonna fucking suck from now on is what you're saying hasn't it sucked for a little bit it's gonna suck for a minute it was cool when i was 16 now it's when blizzard owned the ip and it was just blizzard blizzard did good stuff it's like valve valve and they actually made north really old school that we're talking like Starcraft Yeah, like original Starcraft, Starcraft 1 and then Blizzard finally got bought out by EA And that's when you seen that like that degrade in video games. Dude, Donut is wired What I'm hydrated now
Starting point is 00:55:00 You are hydrated yeah It's almost empty. Is there more in there? I don't know is it leaking? That's what I'm saying. I feel it's creased medic Please Cody looks like a man dance next time instead of the Hey, look at the other is that yeah? Oh Whoa, oh He pushes like that feel above his vein you'll feel it. Matty, feel his vein. When he pushes like that, feel above his vein. You'll feel it forcing in.
Starting point is 00:55:48 It's crazy feeling. I've felt a lot of donuts veins in my life, and I'm just not ready to feel this one. You just see his tear ducts. It's for your pleasure. Donut tear ducts turn on. He just starts spraying. Are you forcing that into my body right now? He just starts uncontrollably pissing all over the fucking hotel. He just screams, ah!
Starting point is 00:56:09 It's out of all his orifices. I peed, farted, shitted, and camed. What's happening? Oh, damn it. Well, somebody's squeezing your life juice back into you, so... Your life juice? It is! My blood feels good now
Starting point is 00:56:26 god I just need a still from the beginning and a still at the end to show your face where you're like hey I'm alive oh he remembers out of people I can interact with the dots now is there gonna be is there gonna be medics with IV bags at the BRCC
Starting point is 00:56:42 party there fucking better be cause god damn next year I just wanna put it in the suggestion Is there going to be medics with IV bags at the BRCC party? There fucking better be. Because goddamn. Next year, I just want to put it in the suggestion box. Hey, Matt, can we get some IV bags? This should be a standard. Industry standard. Like, we're in Vegas. You know how many ex-military medics would just show up and offer that service just to be there?
Starting point is 00:57:03 Yes. It's almost like we should start a company, Brandon. Huh. Huh. Huh. I just want to... Oh, wow, you're really putting that in there. Oh, I can feel that shit. That is what she said.
Starting point is 00:57:17 Push right above it, feel right above it. You'll feel it flowing into that vein. Oh, neat. He's like, I don't that vein. Oh, neat. He's like, I don't like that. I'm back. I'm back. He just opened the floodgates there? No, he was squeezing it into my body.
Starting point is 00:57:33 He opened it there. Jesus. I'm not going to tell you how to do your job, but this looks wrong. This looks like it should hurt. I'm a person again. It's alright, I watched a person again hi everyone not a professional medic here today I kill my friend thanks for not killing me by the
Starting point is 00:57:59 way that's really kind of there's still some watch time left over here. You never know. Yeah, we need to finish. Hey guys, make sure you watch the end of this video to see if donut survives. Hard cut. Is that the best part? Oh, this is the juicy part. Oh yeah, here we go.
Starting point is 00:58:19 Blood to the blood God. Let's see it. So ready for this part. I guess. Ah! Oh, yeah, he's a squirter. Thanks, buddy. Is that the little plastic needle?
Starting point is 00:58:38 So jealous of you. I know. That was a good call. It's been so long since I've seen that. There we go. Dude, do another one more shout out to yourself. Look in that camera.
Starting point is 00:58:48 You got to come to a mic. Yeah, right here. But you're right here. Look at it. I'm a special operations medic and I do special operations medicine and I own a nonprofit for special operations medics, which is called special operation. SOMC,M-C.
Starting point is 00:59:09 S-O-M-C. Check them out. They're amazing people. What are the odds that if you stuck me with that needle right now, I'd have AIDS? That's the odds of Cody. That's on the Cody odds. He's got a quarter we can flip real quick. Okay, okay. I know we tore through Tinder there for a while together, but...
Starting point is 00:59:32 I did three tours on Bumble with this guy. I may not have a purple heart, but... I did three tours... Let me show you my medical records. God damn it, that's fucking gone. That's a skit idea right there. Oh my god. I did three tours with this guy in Bumble.
Starting point is 00:59:54 Okay, you got... Batty, close us out. We should be... Are we done? What's the time? We gotta go to the party. Black Rifle thing. It's like seven and... No, right here. 758. What's this say right there? The number. Oh. Read it upside down for me. We have to do things. It's an hour 758 Read it upside down for me It's an hour and 5 minutes Yeah see we're good
Starting point is 01:00:09 And like only 8 of those minutes Are like technical issues Yes I am I'm trying to tell you something important Nah I love you Patty go back to the ball joke that was great Yeah I'd love to hear more of that
Starting point is 01:00:25 I can't hit all of it anymore thank you everyone for watching the unsubscribe podcast today of course with Eli double tap donut operator my sweet sweet baby boy
Starting point is 01:00:43 the real grandson my sweet sweet baby boy Grantham Grantham and of course Brandon Herrera we love you guys the worst fourth unofficial host unofficial also the best
Starting point is 01:00:58 the best and the worst fourth host the only guy we can ever get to show up hi I'm Batty goodbye love you cheers look at your water's heated
Starting point is 01:01:11 dude you got that good good hot blood that hot blood

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