Unsubscribe Podcast - 4 - My Crippling Pokemon Addiction

Episode Date: January 27, 2021

NEW PODCASTS MON/WED Every episode gets worse, this one is no exception. Blame our new Producer, Gallagher! Alcoholism, The Boot Campaign, awful AWFUL fanfic, Baddies crippling pokemon addiction, adu...lt money and trading card games, are games harder now, insane speed runs and making Eli's brother accidently do a big dumb.  ok go away.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Wendy's most important deal of the day has a fresh lineup. Pick any two breakfast items for $5. New four-piece French toast sticks, bacon or sausage wrap, English muffin sandwiches, value iced coffee, and more. Limited time only at participating Wendy's Taxes Extra. Oh, that was good. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Oh. So.
Starting point is 00:00:22 Introduce. Start it. Hi, I'm Batty. This is Eli underscore double tap and mr. Bonobo Yeah, yeah, yeah, so shit ranch water, huh? I know a big show. Okay, shout out to our sponsors Well, okay, we're air quotes on sponsor our word, a message from our sponsors. What do you think when you move to Texas? Ranches. And what do humans need to sustain life? Water.
Starting point is 00:00:53 Okay, moving on. Please don't block us. Ranchwater's on their Instagram right now. Block Batty. Block Eli. Block Donut. We are not allowed to block you. I lie. They've already blocked me, guys. I don't know what you mean.
Starting point is 00:01:07 I'm already... Picture of our faces. Don't sell these. Do not sell. Don't sell them ranch. Oh, fuck. These people hate us. They're just the worst.
Starting point is 00:01:17 So, speaking of alcohol, we talked about... I think it was the last podcast. We're alcoholics. Yay! We did the boot campaign. Batty raised like $40,000. And the boot campaign just sent me a package while we were sitting here. And they sent me some whiskey.
Starting point is 00:01:32 Oh. Texas blended whiskey. TX. Just TX whiskey. But that was super nice of them. Yeah, Firestone and Robertson Distilling Company. That's crazy. They sent you whiskey. Yeah, they sent me whiskey. And I only raised $3,000 as opposed to your $40, Company. That's crazy. You raise all this. You know, they sent you whiskey.
Starting point is 00:01:45 Yeah, they sent me whiskey, and I only raised three grand as opposed to your 40. That's so crazy. I really hope I have a package when I get home. You guys want to try the boot camp whiskey? Oh, yeah. We're going to try this right now. Ready? No, guys.
Starting point is 00:01:58 Cheers. It's fine. We don't need to. Shots. Shots. What time is it? Oh, wait. 12.40. This is perfect. It's is perfect it's afternoon it's saturday the fights are tonight mcgregor's fighting what's another guy's name it's not important
Starting point is 00:02:14 i was expecting that was good i don't know why i was thinking it was the peanut butter one oh screwball i thought it was screwball so i was like oh it's gonna have that peanut but that's whiskey let's just love whiskey but that is my taste buds were not ready for that palette i was like screwball's really good dude it's dangerous yeah you can we made a reese's cup reese's cup shot one time we put chocolate liqueur and peanut and the peanut butter whiskey together yeah and it tastes like a reese's cup As a fat kid, it's dangerous, though. You're not fat. You're looking good.
Starting point is 00:02:47 You're looking really good. That's crazy, because not ten minutes before we started this, you were calling me fat again. No, I said you're in this group of guys. You're the funny one. Sure. I hate it. No one's going to walk up and be like, oh, Matt, donut. Eli.
Starting point is 00:03:06 You're funny. It's the guy with the large shadow. I'm not. I'm sorry. You too, Corey? I didn't say anything. No. I think that you're a gorgeous human being.
Starting point is 00:03:22 Is this the bromance people were talking about? You're lying through your teeth. Hold on. I gotta bring this up. I'm getting yelled at from the producer, Gallagher. I don't think he's a producer. Is he the producer? I mean, he's the producer now. This is as close as it gets. This is where it's
Starting point is 00:03:37 gonna sit. So can you just be shorter? Yeah. Can you pull that up on the screen, Gallagher? On our TV. Kermit on Twitter at TheFroggyNight commented and said, How do I convince my lazy friends to do things like this? Talking about our podcast. There's just so much bromance and raw sexual energy in your work.
Starting point is 00:03:58 Talent. Talent. That's what I love. Raw talent. Not talent. Sexual energy. That's what I always loved being described as. It's that.
Starting point is 00:04:08 Huge, throbbing, sexual energy. Yeah. Just exploding out. So yeah, if you guys actually listen to, if you actually listen to this,
Starting point is 00:04:17 all of the podcasts, leave a review somewhere because we can read those and it's fun. We'll read them for you. Also, a big shout out to everyone that started reading or writing fan fiction. Oh, my God, dude. Fantastic work. I think we can actually.
Starting point is 00:04:33 You want me to read it? I don't want. I'm not going to read it. I'll read it. I'll pop a chub and that'll be weird. God damn it. Eli leans over. Or wait.
Starting point is 00:04:44 Start at the beginning. Wait, maybe we shouldn't have the Bravo read. Can you read? It's worded kind of different. Oh, well, I'll just start here. Eli's hand softly but firmly closes over donuts. Now see, you want to make sure to grip it firm, but not too hard. Let it warm in your palm before you cock
Starting point is 00:05:06 it like so. Eli reaches his other hand, arms seeming to wrap around Donut as now he holds him, pressed hard against his chest. He leans a bit on the side. Is this a rain stream? Looking up at Donut to see if he's watching
Starting point is 00:05:21 and Donut is watching him ever so intently batty walks in stopping as his eyes grow big at the scene what the fuck are you doing Eli he grabs Eli and pulls him towards him glaring at donut I warned you about trying to steal
Starting point is 00:05:38 my man didn't I scene so we need more in-depth ones. No, we don't. No, we don't. Those guys get raw. I don't want those text messages anymore. I do not want those text messages
Starting point is 00:05:55 anymore. I was enjoying myself last night just watching a movie looked at my phone and was like, well, I'm gay now. Yeah, 100%. That's how I was just getting texts like, and Princess Peach grabs Sonic's hedgehog dick. And I was like, oh yeah, I talked about that.
Starting point is 00:06:11 I forgot about this. Yep. Remember we skipped PG-13. Oh, instantly. He's like, cock! Family. Family friendly. Oh, man. Family friendly fan fiction. Family friendly fan. Is man. Family friendly fan fiction. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:06:25 Family friendly fan. Is that? You know what is family friendly? No. Pokemon. Don't. You're deep addiction right now. Okay.
Starting point is 00:06:34 So. I bought a couple of booster boxes. How many cards are in a booster box? It depends. It depends. Does it? Oh, yeah. There are different types.
Starting point is 00:06:44 There's 36 booster packs in a box. In a regular booster box. It depends. It depends. Does it? Oh, yeah. There are different types. There's 36 booster packs in a box. In a regular booster box. Then you have your elite trainer boxes with eight to ten. And then you have your older tins
Starting point is 00:06:52 which usually have three to five, usually four nowadays. And then you have your packages which I don't remember your blisters which are three to four
Starting point is 00:06:59 or six if you get one of the good ones. But like, let's not, you know, dive into the specifics. Yeah, because Batty, how many
Starting point is 00:07:05 packs do you have to crack? So, let's start at the beginning. I love Pokemon. I have always loved Pokemon. I have the Team Rocket R tattooed on my arm. Did you? Yeah, straight up. Team Rocket R. Did not know that.
Starting point is 00:07:21 When I was a Wii lad, I had a huge Pokemon collection, like an absurd amount of cards, and most of those got thrown away because I moved so much when I was a poor child, like we talk about, all of us being very poor childs. And most of them got thrown away, and I didn't want to start buying cards again
Starting point is 00:07:39 because I was mad most of them got thrown away, and I know I have the type of personality when I get into something, I tend to go overboard. What? Whether it's with with dnd stuff or monitors computer guns or tarka tarka uh and then recently i forgot about this i had bought when pokemon x and y the uh game boy games came out back in like 2017 or 2018 i don't remember exactly when they but around then when they came out i bought uh one of these trainer boxes and a bunch of cards and i was like fuck it x y came in like 2017 or 2018. I don't remember exactly when. But around then when they came out, I bought one of these trainer boxes and a bunch of cards. And I was like, fuck it.
Starting point is 00:08:08 XY came out. I'm going to buy a bunch. And I've had those sitting on my desk as part of like my backdrop for three years. And then Donut reminded me recently about Pokemon. I got back into it. I don't know. John was like, Dad, I want more Pokemon cards.
Starting point is 00:08:24 And I was like, wait a minute. I'm an adult and I can go buy booster boxes now. This is sick. You don't need to buy a pack. You can buy the box. When I was a kid, I would see the booster boxes at the card store and I would tear up because I just really wanted a whole booster box. And yeah,
Starting point is 00:08:39 it just hit me. I have money. I can buy tons of Pokemon cards. When does fast grocery delivery through Instacart matter most? When your famous grainy mustard potato salad isn't so famous without the grainy mustard. When the barbecue's lit, but there's nothing to grill. When the in-laws decide that, actually, they will stay for dinner. Instacart has all your groceries covered this summer.
Starting point is 00:09:02 So download the app and get delivery in as fast as 60 minutes. Plus enjoy $0 delivery fees on your first three orders. Service fees, exclusions, and terms apply. Instacart, groceries that over-deliver. And so John and I went out and we got like five or six booster boxes and opened them on stream and John pulled a Charizard VMAX. You know, it's worth like 200 bucks. And so we were just, we're really excited about it. It's worth like $200.
Starting point is 00:09:26 We're really excited about it. We just keep buying them. Then I told you, hey dude, look, I'm getting all these booster boxes. Here's where you can get them. Now you're like a crack fiend for Pokemon. How many packs do you have to crack? As of right now, I have somewhere around 300 packs. Not booster boxes, but individual packs that I need to open. But by February 2nd, after all the ones I've ordered finally show up, it's going to be like 700 plus packs.
Starting point is 00:09:55 So that's like 20 boxes-ish? Yep. It's a lot. There's a lot of loose packs, like a lot of old school loose packs. What in your mind was like, this is exactly what I'm going to be doing? Hi, look at me. I mean, it's an investment.
Starting point is 00:10:09 Like we talked about, didn't we talk about in the last podcast? It's not an investment. I'm going to open it. No, it's an investment. It's not. Like I could pretend,
Starting point is 00:10:14 like I could lie to myself and say it's an investment, but it's really, I just want Pokemon cards. At the end of the day, I just want a crack pack. All my friends are like, yo man,
Starting point is 00:10:22 you get some real rare ones from these packs, you can get them graded. They're worth a lot of money. I'm like, I don't give a fuck. I just want to open pack. All my friends are like, yo, man, you get some real rare ones from these packs. You can get them graded. They're worth a lot of money. I'm like, I don't give a fuck. I just want to open Pokemon cards, man. Like ripping those blister packs, dude. Whether it's Magic the Gathering.
Starting point is 00:10:34 Fucking Yu-Gi-Oh was my thing back when I was a kid too. Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh. The smell, dude. Oh my. The smell of a freshly opened pack. Dude, the Magic the Gathering. I mean, that's how we play the games too. You'd open.
Starting point is 00:10:44 That's how you do some of those games. It's open the pack right there. Yeah, yeah, that's right. Everyone takes turns. I used to go to tournaments for Yu-Gi-Oh! And you'd be like, you'd have to buy into the tournament. They'd give you a certain amount of cards that you had to use. And you'd be like, and you'd get eight packs.
Starting point is 00:10:58 Make the best deck you can. Yeah. Those were the fucking shit. So when we were playing MTG each individual person you would have your own Unsealed or your on your booster pack and everyone would open it and then you draw one card from that Then you hand the deck to your left. So you go that and you're just picking a card every time to build your deck Oh, man, that's why I never did like that. It's fun It's fun
Starting point is 00:11:22 We used to do just like you'd be given like a set amount of tournament cards and then you'd be like, here's four or five packs, open those, combine them with your tournament cards and everybody would, you know, you'd buy into the tournament. You'd get like four or five packs or whatever the number was.
Starting point is 00:11:36 And you'd have to make the best deck you could out of that. And that was what everybody. I still, I still think like it's crazy. MTG cards have always been worth. Oh, tons. Absolutely tons. I have three boxes of them upstairs. IfG cards have always been worth a lot.
Starting point is 00:11:46 Absolutely tons. I have three boxes of them upstairs if you want to open them later. Done. Okay. Done. But the Pokemon cards have like Bitcoin how fast that shit like escalated. I was talking to a bud of mine who's literally addicted to Pokemon cards as I am. And he was like, I was like, dude, he's been doing all the research on like which packs to buy and he was like i was like send me some good ones and
Starting point is 00:12:09 he's like here man these ones and he's looking he's like fuck this was a hundred bucks last week it's 350 minimum this week it's been a week that's how much they're skyrocketing in price yeah man that's insane thank you logan paul jake jake was it jake yeah it was him and one of the fucking grams graham stevens they opened that pokemon pack on stream but i think we talked about last week how that the first edition booster box sold for 400 grand at auction last week man that's absolutely yo so i know we're gonna do this we're gonna go in on a on a fossil we have to yeah there's like 35 000 right now for the booster box? No, you can get, I've been seeing them for like 20.
Starting point is 00:12:46 Okay. So there's a couple people that have done these. They do buy-ins on stream. It's like $700 to $1,000 for a pack. Yeah. So what you do is people will buy into these booster boxes.
Starting point is 00:12:57 They'll be like, yo, I will pay, you know, $2,000 for two packs out of this unsealed box. Because the thing is, when you buy individual packs of these old school, the rare packs usually weigh more because they're holographic heavy so people don't like buying individual packs really go it's unweighed fuck you that pack's been weighed that motherfucker
Starting point is 00:13:15 selling off one why is it 700 bucks because there's not a good carton because they've weighed those packs so you gotta buy the sealed booster boxes and then you have people buy in like they'll buy it for two packs then you just randomly go through and be like all right these two packs before we open or weigh them or do anything are for this individual and then at the end of the day we'll be like all right i'm buying five donuts buying five and then we'll part out the rest of the 36 packs yeah and that's what a lot of streamers a lot of content creators have been doing on youtube and stuff when they go in on these giant boxes it It makes sense. It's crazy that the weight is different.
Starting point is 00:13:48 Like, magic has been pretty... Oh, it's small. Because it's the holographic cards. They weigh more. Did you ever do the produce aisle trick when you were younger? Oh, my God. Do you know what I'm talking about? I do. Go to the scale.
Starting point is 00:13:59 You take your Pokemon booster pack and you go to the scale on the produce aisle and put it on the scale. And if it weighs slightly more, that's the one with the holographic card in it and that's the one you buy yep yeah these old school life hacks back when we were the 90s so no cell phones the only thing that survived like the the throwing away of my old collection was i have a complete set of jungle and a complete set of fossil non-holos so it's all the holo cards but they also obviously make non-holo versions of them and i have a few base set jungle team rocket holos that kick around like like that that is all i have left like i found them when i finally found
Starting point is 00:14:34 this elite this trainer box i had back in 2017 i forgot i'd kept a couple of my my favorite pokemon cards that i tucked in there motherfucker i got like a couple really good ones in there i'm like yo these are worth like... If I get one graded, I got a card that's worth like two grand. Nice. Well, that's like my one friend. They have stacks. I was sending the guy's picture. It's like they have stacks of just
Starting point is 00:14:56 all first edition. Send us your Pokemon cards. All first edition. It's like Charmanders. Like six Charmanders first edition. I was like, this is in your garage? Yeah. I don't know. It's just all the Pokemon cards just in my garage.
Starting point is 00:15:09 I was like, these are all first edition. Okay, we're going to bring these in. You're a millionaire. We're going to take care of these cards. So the hardest part about this stuff is a lot of these things can be worth money, but you have to get them graded. Yeah. And that takes time and, like, effort. And nobody, like, that's when people are telling me, you've got to get these cards graded.
Starting point is 00:15:23 And I'm like, what the fuck? I just want to open Pokemon cards. Grading is when you send it off to TCG and then they take it and then they use a microscope. The fucking coloring, how the shading looks, the edging, the fucking
Starting point is 00:15:39 slight fucking ripples on the card. It's wild. It's like a 1 to 10 scale or something. Yeah, 10. I was talking about perfect like you don't find that like they come out of the packs and nines and eights at the time like it's wild yeah i pulled that charizard v max or john did on stream the other night people touch it yeah yeah i was like i touched it and people were like don't don't touch it don't touch it just like put it down stop yeah yeah we i just put it down because that thing it's it's $150 just out of the pack. But if you get it graded and it gets like a nine, it's worth $600.
Starting point is 00:16:10 So, yeah. That shit didn't exist when we were little. We just liked pulling Pokemon cards out of packs. My buddy had those. I think I told you, one of my buddies when we played MTG back in middle school, he had a Black Lotus. And he's like, yeah, this is worth $200. And it was in like a glass container
Starting point is 00:16:25 and everything and he had wrote uh you substitute cards a lot when you build your deck yeah yeah you don't use the black lotus because yeah i have too fucking much to put in a goddamn desk yes leave or anything so it's like a black lotus here it is it's written on like a land just as black lotus and that's how you play it there are very few things that you can be certain of in life. But you can always be sure the sun will rise each morning. You can bet your bottom dollar that you'll always need air to breathe and water to drink. And, of course, you can rest assured that with Public Mobile's 5G subscription phone plans, you'll pay the same thing every month.
Starting point is 00:17:05 With all of the mysteries that life has to offer, a few certainties can really go a long way. Subscribe today for the peace of mind you've been searching for. Public Mobile. Different is calling. is redonkulous. It's like, what was the last one? One's on eBay right now. I sent you the link to it. It was like 200 grand right now? Yeah. And the auction just started and people are already getting it. Okay, so as somebody who doesn't know
Starting point is 00:17:30 fuck all that magic, because I've never been into magic. My friends always were. I never got into magic hardcore. I figured you would be a magic guy over Pokemon. So I played. I played magic,
Starting point is 00:17:40 but I never got into what cards are worth. I had some, but that was never, what is, what makes a black Lotus? So holy fuck. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:17:49 So there was in the, is it just a rare, like a good card or is it? It is an extremely good car and it's, you can't use it in any format. So it's banned. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:17:56 I mean a lot, a lot of cards are like that. Yeah. When you have your, uh, like your black Lotus, that is an alpha. And then it was out the gate.
Starting point is 00:18:04 You have like one of the most powerful set card well it's we're talking like a first edition charizard yeah it's like a core alpha a core card yeah yeah gotcha they're called alphas and they're rare back in the day because it was you played magic you have a card that you can play zero mana to play it's instantly cast and it's three mana on on the oh fucking yeah so yeah when you set it right is that when you put it down it's instantly three if i remember right it's instant three so you now have three plus whatever you want so you can get a lot of big cards out extremely quick right at the right out the gate yeah right out the gate so you can just start beating ass and
Starting point is 00:18:41 then they have depending on what cards usually in magic it's how powerful they are what they're being used for at the time and then uh and then any of the old school that just it's it's the idea of old video games old cards people didn't keep it and they just threw it away or they didn't keep it in good condition wild to think about like collecting cards back in the day versus collecting cards now yeah when you when you got collect when you were so okay here's the question though is it collecting cards as a kid versus an adult or is it collecting cards in the early 90s 2000s versus collecting cards you know in 2015 plus i look is that the difference is it because when we were kids we just didn't give a fuck but. But I know kids now that are just like locking shit down.
Starting point is 00:19:27 Like, no, no, I got booster boxes I've unopened. I could never have done that. Dude, I've had these booster boxes for four days, and I'm like sweating thinking about opening them. I'm like, I need to open them right now. And I'm trying to wait until I have all of them in. So I just want to take a single picture of my literal addiction so I know to stop doing this. Well, it's a lot of those old, you look at it, look at old comic books and people wouldn't touch them.
Starting point is 00:19:55 You have like the first edition of Superman sold. The last one sold for like two or four million dollars. Fuck. Okay, just real quick. My dad was like, he was born in 1957 he was a comic book fiend had all the first edition batman superman's like action comics that was the first superman when he had that he came home one day and his mom very religious woman was burning every single one of them oh my god yeah like how i'm talking about the comic you just said, the first action comics with suit where Superman appeared worth like $2
Starting point is 00:20:28 million. And that's when, that's when me, Ma Dona died, right? She passed away that day, fell into the fire. It was the weirdest thing.
Starting point is 00:20:37 Face first right into the fire pit. Who would have thought? Wild. Wild. Yeah. All those, like those were so much. And you have that.
Starting point is 00:20:45 That's why I started collecting video games unopened in the early 2000s, late 2000s. Really? Because I was like, oh, I'm just going to buy these games and never open them. I got money now on video games. I was like, I think I told you because I have Xenogears, Sealed, PS1. No shit. That's cool. I have World of Warcraft Collector's Edition.
Starting point is 00:21:05 Do you have a Final Fantasy 7 like four disc pack? Three disc. Isn't it four? Three. Four. Number. Final Fantasy 8 was the four disc. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:21:13 It was the eight. It was the four disc. Okay. Okay. Okay. I swore it was. Really? Two and three.
Starting point is 00:21:17 Fuck, dude. It's been so long. I guess I'm just. So good. But those games. Like Xenogears is like two grand or four grand sealed. Yeah. World of Warcraft Collector's Edition is like $30,000 or $40,000 right now.
Starting point is 00:21:29 No shit. Yeah. And you have one? Yeah. What's your address again? Never mind. I have it. Guys, I got to go.
Starting point is 00:21:36 What's this? It's something to take care of. But I have a bunch of sealed games. I just literally have a box of them. I was like, oh, I'll just do this and whatever happens, happens. And I was like, oh, these are starting to really take off in price. Young Eli made a good decision on that one. I wish young Daddy had made any good decisions.
Starting point is 00:21:58 Same here. Now I have a kid and shit. But now they get. I love you, John. I'm playing. Go. Ranchwater. Ranchwater.
Starting point is 00:22:12 But now we get to actually buy... What the nicest thing is is when I got back into Magic and we played... We have to play a commander. It's one of the best forms of Magic the Gathering because you can play
Starting point is 00:22:22 with groups of people. It's not one-on-one. Oh, you're talking about where you pull the cards? No one is so how you play magic to get how you play commander is you build a deck of a hundred cards you only can have one of each card other than lands so you have your commander and your commander is your specific they have all these different moves so this is kind of like like heararthstone or all these games where you have your champion or whatever, and that has a special move,
Starting point is 00:22:48 and then you have all your cards in front of it? Yes, and your champion you can put out, as long as you have the mana to tap to put him out, you can put him out. Now, if they kill him, he goes back into its reservoir or whatever, and then it costs two more mana to cast him back out.
Starting point is 00:23:03 Every time you cast him back out, though, and you build your deck around that one commander, so you make it a badass deck around that one commander. But it's a social game because I'm like, if I'm doing bad and Batty's doing the best, I'm like, Donut, do you want to form an alliance and kill Batty? Yeah, and literally that's how it goes. So the more people you have playing...
Starting point is 00:23:20 We're not even playing, I'm being picked on. Bullshit! But yeah, we'll have to... It's a social game. So what I'm hearing is we're not even playing i'm being picked on it's but yeah we'll have to like it is uh it's it's a social game so what i'm here is we're gonna play mad can you teach me how to play magically gathering again i haven't straight up it's been a minimum of 10 years i have three boxes upstairs we could do that pull cards from the booster thing like we're talking sealed we could open yeah yeah i got three it's the newest the newest whatever they just came out yeah yeah dude
Starting point is 00:23:43 i think his buddy shout out to was it the command zone uh this is jimmy wong he's from long jimmy yeah jimmy and then uh josh but they do a commander series i love you freddie yes and it's phenomenal because they're the ones that taught me how to play the game now commander to build good decks you are spent like my prosch deck was probably an easy thousand dollars of cards. Yo, that's a... Okay, so good point. Good point on that real quick. Adult money buying cards, dude?
Starting point is 00:24:11 Oh, my God. Kid Eli would have had the shittiest Prosh deck. Like, well, I got an Island. You buy two cards for $15, and you're like... Exactly, because I used to go to the Magic tournaments when I was a kid, and you would have the adults come in that had money and they would wreck every kid there. Destroy you, man. The new Mitsubishi Outlander brings out another side of you.
Starting point is 00:24:34 Your regular side listens to classical music. Your adventurous side rocks out with the dynamic sound Yamaha. Regular you owns a library card. Adventurous you owns the road with super all-wheel control. Regular side, alone time. Adventurous side journeys together with third row seating. The new Outlander. Bring out your adventurous side.
Starting point is 00:24:57 Mitsubishi Motors. Drive your ambition. Now we can be those. Where are those? I was thinking about that the other day. Okay, so I've been trying to find like some pokemon cards so i've been going to like any store that sells them within 40 miles of us i did that don't judge me but i remember going i remember thinking when i was walking because i i also really like going into like your local flag game stores like i
Starting point is 00:25:19 love going into game stores like for dnd stuff whatever there's a really fucking cool one in san antonio called like night something where they have like swords and fucking statues you can dress up they have long tables for dnd sessions and shit yeah super fucking cool dude i got this was the coolest store i've been to a while either way uh uh going around like going to these stores i had that thought of fuck man i'm that i'm the adult now that's going through and being like, give me all your cards. And then kids are like, what? That guy's so cool, and the mom's pulling the kid back.
Starting point is 00:25:53 He's got a beard and glasses. He's wearing sweatpants in a store right now. You and I went to the stores and cleaned them out. I'm sorry, kids. You're not getting any cards. San Antonio is tapped. Dude, Target, none and cleaned them out. Yeah. I'm sorry, kids. You're not getting any cards. San Antonio is tapped. Dude, Target, none. Completely sold out.
Starting point is 00:26:09 Shelves empty. It is wild to see how... After we leave here, you know what I'm doing? Going to San Antonio House of Cards. They just made an Instagram post. They have a bunch of new boxes in. You know, they're friends with us. Did you tell them that you're friends with them?
Starting point is 00:26:23 Yeah, dude. They messaged me on Instagram and shit they're all like yo come back please we was really cool to have you yeah because because you and i collectively spent like five grand there dude i said i made an instagram post about their store they fucking lost their shit it was cool i'm like fuck yeah man dude shout out san antonio house cards absolutely good fucking place they had the advice come by like that's how big pokemon cards are right now like so i when i went in a couple days after uh donut went in i was looking to buy some boost boxes like we only have a few that we can put out right now and that's because
Starting point is 00:26:57 we're having vice news come by and we can't if we put cards out they'll sell out that same day so like we have to keep some in the back for the news article like because they wanted to have stock yeah when they did this interview dude that's that like that's that's where pokemon cards are at like who would have thought this many years later that's where we'd be at that's crazy it's funny dude it's it's that fad the pokemon fad just keeps cycling like yeah It's like D&D right now. It's the renaissance of fucking tabletop gaming. Again, whether it's Magic the Gathering, Pokemon, D&D,
Starting point is 00:27:33 Star Wars is popping the fuck off right now in the tabletop gaming world. That's so awesome to see. I will say, if we went to... I wonder how Japan is doing with Pokemon cards and their uptick on that because it's completely different area that actually i mean japanese cards are selling in the u.s more
Starting point is 00:27:51 than they've ever sold before i bet because even with mtg we people would buy japanese version or different versions just to have them they might be cheaper or whatever but then they have the card but going over japan seeing pokemon like going to the Pokemon mall was a Pokemon Center yeah it was literally like it's a few stories and you walk in and they have it's just poking like there's Mewtwo and a glass tank standing there bubbles going around him super awesome like that's just Japan in a nutshell with anything collector edition you're going from store to store, and it's just lines of everything in a glass case, and you're like, holy crap, I went to a, it
Starting point is 00:28:30 was a console, and they just have stacks of all the consoles you could ever think of. And they had Castlevania Symphony of the Night for the Sega Saturn. That game, if you can get the American version sealed, it's like $10,000 or $20,000 now. Oh, shit. What the fuck? Yeah, it is. So it was a rare, and it just catapulted in price. Just real quick, real quick.
Starting point is 00:28:53 Army 11 Bravo, Squad Disney Marksman. We have Navy, and we have Army as well. This is the nerdiest fucking game. I know. It's like just tattooed. Tattooed the fucking blades. Well, well okay I had a protein shake this morning and I'm gonna go find Pokemon cards after this like fuck man that's wild when so when you were in did you or either of you like whether it was police stuff for you done on or navy stuff did
Starting point is 00:29:21 you have nerd did you do nerd shit while you were in? Video games. Yeah, a lot of World of Warcraft. Dude. Whoa. Nothing. There was zero, like I had to hide my inner fucking nerd, because there was,
Starting point is 00:29:33 there was, that wasn't a thing when I was in my section, like the scouts and snipers, like it was nothing. No nerds. Dude, there was like one nerd guy, his name was Kim,
Starting point is 00:29:41 he was Asian, he just posts memes for a living now, I swear to God. But like, there was no nerd shit. Everyone was like the good guy. His name was Kim. He was Asian. He just posts memes for a living now, I swear to God. But like, there was no nerd shit. Everyone was like the good old boy redneck hunters. Oh, yeah. So I was like, I'm the only fucking nerd, man. Dude, I remember finally playing World of Warcraft.
Starting point is 00:29:56 I got like a couple of my buddies on it because no one had PC games. No one just played video games, really. And it was like, I got that one buddy across the way. I think it was Ennis. He started playing. We had one more. And we just played world of warcraft and just be like that was it that's how we did our days our weekends just like oh off work you're pulling down your acu pants you just put them at your ankles sit there and you're right yeah we uh the first barracks i was in like out of a school out of like the initial training when you're in
Starting point is 00:30:24 uh we had a guy get kicked out because he school, out of like the initial training when you're in, we had a guy get kicked out because he was playing World of Warcraft too much. He would get like out of school on Friday, and then he would go, and there was a McDonald's beside the barracks, and he would buy like 10 double cheeseburgers from the McDonald's and put them in his fridge, and he would sit there and play World of Warcraft from Friday when he got off to Monday when he had to go back in, and he would just pull out double cheeseburgers and microwave them while he's sitting there and he started shitting in his trash can and peeing in bottles and just didn't move for like a 48 plus hours the meme he did the he did and he got kicked out of the military because he was addicted to world of
Starting point is 00:30:57 warcraft and would play it 48 hours plus and then he he was doing that for weeks and then it eventually got to the point where he wasn't even going into school or work anymore and this is the military you know you can't really do that can't just not go and uh yeah he got kicked out failure no shit that's wild that man is a hundred percent homeless right now oh yeah absolutely homeless out of the fucking road anything helps god bless like okay bud i wasn't that bad i know but i played the shit out of world of warcraft i was never that bad i remember one of my favorite experiences everyone we got back from the range and they were like hey we we have these uh the
Starting point is 00:31:39 guns have to be left out if you watch these guns all night uh you can have the next day off and it was a thursday so i was like yeah i'll get friday and they were like but we have to keep these guns in a room i was like do i get to choose what room and they're like yeah i was like my room and i just locked the door and i stay in there and like yeah i was like yeah i was like put guns in my room world of warcraft on i was just like gone yeah i think i hit like level that was like 56 to 60 on vanilla wow time like that was yeah yeah and I was just grinding that I was like BRD or BDR whatever it is yeah that's exactly what I did for that entire night I was like I get a do CQ in my bedroom and play
Starting point is 00:32:21 video games and get tomorrow off at 9 a.m.? Done. Done. Yes, I'll take this easy. It won't take long to tell you Neutral's ingredients. Vodka, soda, natural flavors. So, what should we talk about? No sugar added? Neutral. Refreshingly simple.
Starting point is 00:32:57 Yeah, I mean, just World of Warcraft, any of those games. I don't know, like, the older we get, it is definitely... I can't play MMOs anymore. I can't play games in general i do finishing storyline games i don't know if it's i couldn't i haven't finished cyberpunk dude i i would sit down like so i rpgs were my fucking life back in the day i didn't do mmos as much as like single-player rpgs whether that was because i didn't have internet or friends whatever but like sitting down to finish a single-player rpg morrowind was my big one elder scrolls 3 morrowind that game will forever be like my favorite thing in the world i i would just shut off my brain for days and just play morrowind. Like, different builds, like, just fucking nonstop.
Starting point is 00:33:45 And now, I remember I tried to do a Skyrim playthrough, and I, like, I made it three hours in, and I was like, I gotta go do something. Anything else. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Because, I mean, that's, like, when I was younger, I did the same thing, Morrowind, Skyrim. A lot of Fallout, stuff like that.
Starting point is 00:34:02 A lot of, I mean, Final Fantasy when, you know, we were in high school and middle school and stuff. Those story games, you just drown your life away doing that. Yeah, I'm the exact opposite now as an adult because kid, job, everything else, you would exactly be like you want to do something else that's productive. So you do Warzone and then we do Tarkov because it's like in, out. That's a job. And it's a job
Starting point is 00:34:25 though and i how i always explain it is there is active entertainment in active entertainment we are working creating content doing this throughout the entire day and then not passive anymore it used to be background noise for us we could sit down and just play whatever and it was a passive you were just in you were there it didn't exactly. Now you have to think the entire time. So when I get off of stream, when I get off of stream, I want inactive entertainment. I want to turn on a TV show.
Starting point is 00:34:52 Yep. And I want, I don't want to play a video game. I do not want to do anything. Dude, I don't sit at my PC. No. God, no. I'm like,
Starting point is 00:34:58 I don't want to be here anymore. I'm an introvert, so I get no energy from it. I know you aren't. You get energy from everything. I'm just introvert, so I get no energy from it. I know you aren't. You get energy from everything. I'm just like, as long as the stream goes on, I'm just dying more and more. I love my community. I'm just, my own personality is like, it kills me being in front of people.
Starting point is 00:35:16 I'm like, oh, God. I need you. I miss, dude. Do you think our careers have ruined that for us? Absolutely. 100%. I use the game for fun. I don't game offline
Starting point is 00:35:25 anymore i mean so i've tried a few like every now and then i can try to get in a couple hours of like offline entertainment it's usually the game with somebody but the amount of times people like yo man let's just get a couple games in offline i'm like dude i know people like are listening to this and they're probably like oh wow you get to play video games for a living. It's like any job, man. Yeah, it's kind of ruined it a little bit. When you make a job out of a hobby, it takes that little bit of a spark that was your hobby away because you now have to think about a lot more than just fucking having fun. Yeah, we play games, but you have to worry about your analytics. You have to worry about numbers.
Starting point is 00:36:02 You have to worry about, fuck, how many ad spots did i do how many how long was i live do i need to do i need to be live tomorrow because i took today off like fuck i'm taking three days off in a row this week which means for the rest of the month i have to be live every single fucking day for at least five fucking hours then you're like fuck i have to find a way to make be funny in game for five to eight hours every day for the next three weeks because i was just like it's a lot man and i have to entertain my chat i have to entertain i have to do that while playing this video game for it's not just being live yeah that's what people fail it's like oh you just get to play video games for a living that's amazing that's the best dream it's we are blessed we are blessed
Starting point is 00:36:39 with everything we do but dear god people that think this is like the easiest thing in the world when people come and work and hang out with like all of us i mean we have uh zex out here right now but he's out here yeah zex came and surprised business yeah he literally you i got him where is he at matt's he's he's gonna be there tonight yeah oh fuck yeah dude oh i can't wait to make fun of him in person i know that's oh man that's all we were doing. Is he awkward? No. Well, he's just like, his mind is blown because he's coming into this community. Oh, yeah. We were at the gun range, and he's just like, your guys' brains just don't shut off with content or ideas.
Starting point is 00:37:14 Never. We're like, no. We've got to do this. X, Y, Z, Z, Z. We're always thinking of dumb, funny shit. Yeah. And it's like, that conversation will keep building and building, and then you're moving, and then stream, and then out.
Starting point is 00:37:24 And you're like, okay. But he's he's like man it does look like all fun and it's uh the other people that came and worked with us that are like fans or whatever communities and they see it and they're like oh these guys actually like hustle like this is not a it's all fun and games all the time it's like no this is a job and we treat it way. And it is self-employed. That's why you're successful. Yes, because we're self-employed. The hardest part is having the motivation to do it yourself. That's where people fuck up all the time.
Starting point is 00:37:54 You crushed this last week. And then you sucked the month before. No, you know, being self-employed in itself is hard. You know, you can wake up and, like, not do anything, and that's fun, but...
Starting point is 00:38:11 Yeah, I did that for, like, two months after moving here. I was trying to adjust and everything, but the past two weeks... Life's gonna kick you in the dick sometimes. Yeah, you know, when your revenue gets cut in half because you decided to take a little break, you wake up one day and say oh god i mean it's just like any job though you sometimes you have paid vacation sometimes you don't
Starting point is 00:38:29 you never do you don't get paid vacation off twitch and as soon as you lose that fucking momentum twitch dude you lose your momentum your revenue goes you got nothing man absolutely nothing i felt that fuck it was the same thing after during my move like tearing apart your pc trying to move across the country trying to fucking set up like this ghetto fucking pc set up at donuts house when i was living with you then moving to my own house then not having internet then have my internet crash every day it's like fucking brutal thanks for helping me though with the pc it's not done yeah right well uh kind of i just built a new pc because i'm doing the dual streaming PC setup
Starting point is 00:39:05 yeah big boy PC setup I got a 3090 in my gaming PC I mean you're done all you have to worry about is like routing to make sure you have
Starting point is 00:39:11 like audio working properly between your two PCs that was hard as shit to set up a dual PC that's why I'm gonna have Patty do it because we
Starting point is 00:39:18 well Artesian their computer company they're doing the do you know what kind of PCs they're building? we're working with Matt and I for the bulletproof PCs oh yeah
Starting point is 00:39:30 like legit bulletproof can I shoot one? oh yeah like AR-5 this is what we're supposed to do right here I was going to work with them but I'm working with Alienware
Starting point is 00:39:42 and then I told them about that and they didn't call me back they're like yeah we'll call you back in a couple and then I told them about that and they didn't call me back That's- yeah, that's like- They're like, yeah, we'll call you back in a couple days after we figure out some stuff No, they didn't call me back That's like us having the talks with Ranchwater and it's like, oh by the way, we also work with, uh, you ever heard of, uh, Bud Light? Yeah Uh, we- Ranchwater, we don't, we don't, Ranchwater, we only love you
Starting point is 00:40:01 We love Ranchwater Who we're still not officially sponsored by it, I don't think. But we are. Ranch Water. Yeah, but we're not. Please message us back. Stop ignoring. They're leaving us on read.
Starting point is 00:40:14 That's what it is, too. Fuck, man. So it's like, okay. So, yeah, we game a lot. Yeah, it's not as good as it used to be when we were kids. But when we were kids, you could go through any game you wanted you would just go you'd crush it right oh yeah when i'm playing tarkov now dude i'm getting my ass whooped 90 of the time and i play this game for a job so like am i just that bad at games have i I always been that bad? Like when I play games now, like Cyberpunk, man.
Starting point is 00:40:47 I was playing Cyberpunk the other day. I got that bitch on not the easiest setting, but like one up from the easiest. I still die. Am I just not good? I play normal. I play normal all the time. I am big on normal. I just don't care as much.
Starting point is 00:41:03 Is that it though? Is it that you don't care as much? Because I've seen you play Warzone, and you fucking care when you're playing Warzone, bud. I care about that. Now, okay, I will say, what was the last video game? I did beat Mario Odyssey recently, and I went there, and it took like a month. Did you play it on stream?
Starting point is 00:41:19 No, this was like- You played a game for fun, and you finished it. Yeah, because it's Mario. It's not a whole bunch of time dedicated to something. Did you remember Mario 64, though? That was time and dedication. Yeah. So Mario Odyssey's not?
Starting point is 00:41:35 No, if you're not trying to get 120 stars, if you're not trying to complete the whole game, they don't take that long. That's why I was running through it. I was like, five hours of your day, or or of your entire time and you can beat a game you're like cool five to ten hours this is manageable side note watch fallout anthology speed run so that is speed running all the fallouts we're talking like are we starting are we talking three New Vegas. One, two. One, two. Three New Vegas and four. Not 76?
Starting point is 00:42:07 Not 76. That trash pile. He beats all of them and New Vegas under an hour. Like, collective. What? Like, he was like, okay, this is Fallout 1. This is how we do this. And 10 minutes done.
Starting point is 00:42:20 And I'm like, who is this? Do we know? This was on a, I don't even know. Games Done Quick style. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was literally Games on Quick. And you're like, wait, they beat these games this fast? And it's like, okay, so this is two.
Starting point is 00:42:32 So this is what we're going to do here. Okay, 15 minutes done. Okay, so Fallout 3 is a bit different. What we're doing is a mechanic called the glitch or speedrun or floating. It turns you into a jet. And I'm like, what do you mean it turns you into a jet and i'm like what do you mean you turn you into a jet oh man he starts flying i'm like oh my god he's a jet and he's just flying around the map of your star scream from transformers okay got it what the fuck is this but it's hilarious because
Starting point is 00:42:56 you're like man these games are like 40 to 80 hour games dude i remember watching speedruns of morwen the game i've easily done like a 600 hour single playthrough before I beat it. Motherfucker's like, I sneezed and he finished the game. He's like, yeah, you just glitch through the fucking death wall and then you're in the red mountain and you kill Dagoth. I'm like, what the fuck just happened? We were talking about that last time too, just how insane speedrun I've gotten, where it's not even really a speedrun anymore. It's more just manipulating the code in the game with your character.
Starting point is 00:43:29 Yeah, that's why you have glitchless or glitchruns. The glitchruns are just hilarious. Che, my brother, he's actually doing now... Wait, wait, wait. Is this the brother that I got to delete all your money in Tarkov? So one time, Eli was playing... This was back when Eli used to play Escape from Tarkov
Starting point is 00:43:46 with me a lot. This should have been the last episode of Trolls. Oh my god. So me and Kings and Eli were all playing Escape from Tarkov, and in that game you have like a stash where all your money is stored, and Eli left the room for... Explain the app.
Starting point is 00:44:01 Huh? With the app that... Oh yeah, yeah, yeah yeah so eli left the room for a minute but when we play we used to use this thing this program called a bit bot where on twitch people can donate small amounts of money like pennies 50 cents whatever and it would take control of your game and make a movement whether that was opening up your inventory deleting an item shooting your gun throwing your grenade whatever now in your inventory in deleting an item, shooting your gun, throwing your grenade, whatever. Now, in your inventory, in your stash, after you were out of like a fight,
Starting point is 00:44:31 you could get it to delete stuff if the mouse was hovering over it. Well, we didn't tell Eli's brother, Chathis, so we were like, okay, bro, just hover your mouse over all of Eli's money and pretend like you're gonna delete it right when he comes back and he's like oh i don't know man i don't want to fuck with him too much we're like no don't actually do it though just scare him and then we he's like okay okay okay oh he's coming back he puts his fucking mouse over it and me and kings both were in eli's chat waiting. We immediately donated money to the stream, and it just deleted every fucking penny.
Starting point is 00:45:08 20 million RuPaul's. No. Yeah, it was like 20 or 30. It was a lot of fucking money. I sit down. I'm like, ah, okay. And Chase' face in the background is like. Panic.
Starting point is 00:45:22 He starts like. Sheer panic. Yeah, he just sees it delete and disappears. He's like,er panic Yeah he just sees it Delete disappears Like Bob who's touching anything The nerve is back and forth And I'm like
Starting point is 00:45:32 Okay what the fuck happened Why is Batty laughing right now I was cackling like a bitch Dude it was so funny I'm like What's so funny I go to buy something I look up
Starting point is 00:45:41 It's like zero Batty and Kate What the fuck did you just do Chase was like I'm doing and they were like Chase did
Starting point is 00:45:48 I was like the slow turn they didn't say that would happen they just said pretend to delete it and then my chest just laughed
Starting point is 00:46:01 and I was like I hate all of you oh my god god bless BitBot I mean My chat's just laughing. It's like... I hate all of you. Oh, my God. God bless BitBot. I mean, holy shit, that game, dude. On that fire... Trash heap. We're going to just end this episode.
Starting point is 00:46:17 I'll reflect on that terrible memory for the rest of my days. Is that why you don't play Tarkov anymore? That one moment. Goodness. Drilled into it. You were bad anyways. I was. Awesome.
Starting point is 00:46:31 Donut, do you want to close this out? Hi, everyone. Donut. It's the only way in. Donut. You say, bye, everyone. Bye, everyone. Donut here.
Starting point is 00:46:44 We're going to close this one out. We have Mr. Eli Doubletap here. Mr. Batty. No, it's Batty! Batty streams. Motherfuckers are tagging me, Batty streams, at Batty streams. I'm like, fuck! Fuck all of you.
Starting point is 00:47:00 Fuck Batty streams. Eli Doubletap, Bonobop operator, and Batty streams. Love you guys. Love you. I love you both.

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