Unsubscribe Podcast - 54 - Administrative Results UNMASKED! ft. Brandon Herrera

Episode Date: May 19, 2022

Unsubscribe Ep54 - Administrative Results UNMASKED! WE'VE DONE IT! UNMASKED The talking Balaclava himself, Admin Results!! THis episode is gonna get WILD. Donut was busy being a hot boi so we had AK Daddy come sit in for him! Dont worry Bronut will be back next week!! GO FOLLOW RESULTS AND BRANDON HERRARA EVERYWHERE!!! Administrative Results @Administrative Results https://www.youtube.com/c/administrativeresults/videos https://www.instagram.com/administrativeresults/ Brandon Herrera @Brandon Herrera https://www.youtube.com/c/BrandonHerrera/videos https://www.instagram.com/realbrandonherrera/ OUR MERCH: https://www.bunkerbranding.com/pages/unsubscribe-podcast CHECK OUT https://outofregz.com/ CODE: UNSUB http://gfuel.com/discount/baddie CODE: BADDIE ------------------------------ WHERE TO LISTEN Spotify https://spoti.fi/2Ye8YOU Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/3cbqY4k Amazon https://amzn.to/2YbzQia Google Play https://bit.ly/2YcWmaD Stitcher https://bit.ly/3cbnY8o ------------------------------ Follow the Cast of Unsubscribe -Baddie- @Baddie Streams https://www.twitch.tv/baddie https://twitter.com/BaddieStreams https://www.instagram.com/baddiestreams/ https://www.youtube.com/baddiestreams -DonutOperator- @Donut Operator @Operation Donut https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwkm_Wcyh0pc7UUmZZfL-6w https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator/ https://www.twitch.tv/DonutOperator https://twitter.com/DonutOperator -Eli_Doubletap- @Eli Doubletap https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://www.twitch.tv/Eli_Doubletap https://twitter.com/Eli_Doubletap https://www.youtube.com/c/EliDoubletap ------------------------------ Edited by Fluck https://www.twitch.tv/fluck Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hi there, I'm Ryan Reynolds, and I have a list of things I like to have on set. It's just little things, like two freshly cracked eggs, scrambled, with crispy hash brown, sausage crumble, and creamy chipotle sauce from Tim Hortons. From my rider to Tim's menu, try my new scrambled eggs loaded breakfast box. You're beautiful. No, you're beautiful. No, you're beautiful. Why'd you only call him beautiful after he'd put on the mask? Reminds me of home. Ugh yeah that's my name say hi to

eli it's racially ambiguous that guy's fucking ridiculous that's harder to rhyme but he's a really nice guy welcome to unsubscribe hey guys thanks for watching this podcast um make sure wherever you're listening or watching whether it's on Really nice guy. Welcome to unsubscribe. Hey guys, thanks for watching unsubscribe podcast. Make sure wherever you're listening or watching, whether it's on YouTube, Castro, Spotify, Apple, Google, Amazon, Podbean, Stitcher, or that's all of them. Please leave a comment, like it, thumbs up it, give it a rating of five stars, whatever you do. It helps the podcast out immensely.

And Donut and Eli will be very happy if you do that. And we want to make Donut and Eli happy today. Yeah. Five stars on everything. And a comment if there is possible, because we need to be at the top. Donut, say something motivating. And that's where the, you come, that is. Come subscribe.

Three, two, one. Boom. Wait, who's going for it? There you go. Do we got Adam results on the podcast today? Same, same. No, no, no. Hold on.

Hi, everyone. Unsubscribe podcast. No, no, no. He's right. Hi, everyone. Unsubscribe podcast here. It's a little more like, hi, everyone. Unsubscribe podcast here. It's a little more like, hi, everyone. Unsubscribe podcast here.

Today, we're joined by Admin. Why does he talk like an adult from Charlie Brown? Baddie streams. Brandon boppinator. I don't know why I called you boppinator. That was weird. And Admin. Why did you choose such a hard name?

I like the idea that every time you see the word administration, someone thinks of me. No. Okay. Well, in my head, that's how it played out. You know, although when I do get tested for STDs, and I see the results, then I think of you. Mostly because I'm worried it was the sex with you. That is why I have an STD. You still thought of me, though.

I did. I really did. And he's going to think of you for the rest of his life every time he has a flare-up. Introducing our first sponsor, condoms. Well, we don't use them. And out of Rex. I use that. This is the loop.

Did you ever get fucking with pomade? Huh? Could you fuck with pomade? Is there anything in this? That's a hard way to find out. That's gonna add some abrasiveness to it. I wouldn't think. You gonna get good, girl?

Slap! I have a yeast infection. Weird. Who would have seen that coming? You said adding grit. It reminds me of like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, i have a yeast inflection weird who would have seen that adding grit it reminds me of like laughing compound that you put in something to fucking sounds like they're making mac and cheese oh shit sorry for luck we haven't clapped in like five episodes he gots it down he must hate us admin hi welcome to the podcast bro hi how are you oh i fucking it's so weird just look why did you choose a mask so your eyes are so i know nobody's listening can see this but your eyes are beautiful thank you you're like a poop brown right to the mask uh

essentially i needed i you motherfucker he He's like, this is me. Me and him not really interacted too much. So this is just like, let's just go broke. Yeah, that's fine. So essentially what it was is I need a level of plausible liability based off the last job. That's essentially it. And then as it took off, I kind of got stuck into it. Break that cycle.

Today. Dude, I can't. Not here. Not now. Yeah, you can't why this is the time i wanted there's another man i literally wanted that beat i wanted that beat i was like i hope baddie has a mask so it would literally be like hey okay take the mask off you take it off okay one more i'm like okay okay that's weird right right there is this it's a card i'm holding close to my chest

If I'm being honest with you There is a plan, I don't know if I can do it yet You put the mask on like five minutes ago What do you mean? Hey, Flugg, it's not that close to the chest It's on a luge The thumbnail's gonna be your face, we have you on camera Flugg, just keep that up

Just superimpose it over his face this entire time We have the power now Oh, I'm fucked Just superimpose it over his face this entire time. We have the power now. Oh, I'm fucked. Actually, that would be a good... We'll do your mask, and then we'll just cut in really close to unmask, but we'll pixelate all of it. By your eyes. It is him. I've seen him without the mask, guy.

True. I feel kind of special though knowing It's it's not like I'm trying to be a secret ninja. It's now just part of the channel You like it though you lose all power when you got you gain power cuz no one recognized You always skipping parties to me and I Yeah, we're at the black rival party in Vegas and he just comes up behind me. He's like, I'm administrative results. I'm like, oh. I wasn't trying to get you. I was just trying to have sex with you.

So I don't know if it was going to seduce you or not. I mean, at SHOT Show, that line is pretty good. I'm administrative results is a pretty good pickup line. I heard eight guys say it. I had guys say it. I'm administrative results. No, I'm administrative results. I'm a Spartacus. That girl was like, man, I slept with four different dudes with the same name. I AM SPARTAGUS!

That girl was like, man I slept with four different dudes with the same name. They all work at Administrative Results. They all wore the balaclava. They're all disappointing. The darndest thing, they had incredibly small penises. Incredibly small. His penis had a balaclava. Yeah, it wasn't the same.

I told you about her, she was fantastic. His penis has a ball of cloth. I told you about her. She was fantastic. His penis has a ball of cloth. It's a condom. It's a condom with holes in it. We didn't say it was a good condom. It's not to do... The single eye staring back. Put two sharpied eyes.

For anybody listening, administrator of results wears a balaclava. A penis condom. On his head. A penis condom as opposed to. On his head. Well, which head? Yeah, both heads. Yeah.

Welcome to the show. This feels at home. Good. This feels spot on. Good. But what yeah both heads yeah welcome to the show At home good good is it all the nerdy D&D shit everywhere or Like the sexual tension in the air. I was gonna go more with the sexual that definitely feels like home But it's definitely amplified by all the nerdy D&D okay So are you like how big of a nerd like I'm going to this cold hmm Mike fucking right not knowing I wouldn't say Dungeon Dragons nerd, but I will like go off on a tangent about like the Battle of Agincourt I think that yes anybody okay? Troopers

We had anything it starts a trooper. I don't know I just your course sounds like I would definitely know more fantasy No, I think or is it actually it's more historical historical battle, okay? This is this is the kind of nerdy autism that I bring to the table. I love it. My son's autistic. Oh, I'm sorry me, too That's not a box you get to check ahead of time. Turns out. Who knew? I guess I'll double down. Is it the lethal autism like the accountant? Not yet. He could be. Yeah, because he's threatened us with death.

Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. I'm going to kill you all. We're like, okay, buddy. We don't use that verbiage. I just watched the account like a month prior, I'm like, this is it. Yeah. You're gonna catch him in his bedroom, like fucking like strobes and metal music just rolling his shins.

I'll open it and close it. I'm gonna be like, sssssss. Are you winning, son? Yes, dad. Yes. Okay. Daddy loves you. You gave him a terrifying name too if he's an assassin oh i know yeah riding yeah he's gonna be fucking that's not like joe you know joe ain't coming to kill you but riding's coming to kill you yeah that's it he's a fucking savage little

savage okay so nerd on explain the battle you were talking about. Batty, what is the house set at? A million degrees right now? It's literally 70 degrees in my house right now. Is this 70 degrees? No. Well, it doesn't help that it's 100 outside right now. Okay, so it's set to 70 degrees. No, it's getting 70 degrees in the house right now.

Batty, this is not 70 degrees. Does this feel like 70 degrees? This feels like 95 degrees in here. Brandon's sweating. I'm perspirating sweating i'm always sweating i'm wearing a balaclava yeah sorry about baddie's house it's okay i was my house right now this is not i could there is no this is not oh no it's 75 yeah like it is not fucking 68 degrees it's 75 in the house the lighting doesn't help it's 68. It's 75 in the house, though. The lighting doesn't help. It's like we're getting a tanning bed.

Let's move into a studio. I've said it. This is what this house is supposed to... Can you just turn it down to like 62 when guests come? It doesn't matter. I could. It doesn't fucking matter. Because it's fucking trying to cool the house.

My last house was like that. Where it's like... It's always on. If you didn't get it up in the morning and set it to like 69 degrees before it started like getting midday you were it's been at 68 since yesterday but it just it's just hot it's really hot in texas right now too yeah it's fucking it's 100 degrees out like my house is 68 degrees yeah your house was built last year mine was built in the 80s yeah Sorry, admin. This is that tension. The sexual tension.

If you are just listening. I leave the house hot because I want people to take their clothes off when they're in here. The sexual tension is so thick. It's all we want. It's just a mmm. Okay, back to the battle before. Oh, yeah. We're so honest.

Okay, yeah, yeah. So the French battle, essentially, there's a movie about it with the king and this is the kind of nerdy out I do wait the key way it was on Netflix it has the kid from Dune oh yes Henry the fifth fucking phenomenal phenomenal very good movie the only thing is the historical accuracy and it's pretty pretty fresh off it's way off yeah especially in the battle so essentially like the English they don't have much going for him besides they used to rule the world but now they think they did don't right so this is a very English yeah well at least there's

schools a fucking show in gallery yeah sorry you guys do have sex at least it's worse we do YouTube videos much worse we actually don't have sex. At least- It's worse, we do YouTube videos. Yeah, it's much worse. We actually don't have sex. You influence people. Some people fuck bodies, we fuck minds. We didn't drink enough before we came. No, we didn't. No. But we drank plenty yesterday. Oh, God, yeah. Yeah, we did.

Holy shit. Oh, my God. Anyway, so essentially, what it boils down to is the English lower class murder the French nobility with a bunch of bendy sticks that shoot smaller sticks.

You know, it was like... The Britons were very proud of this so it was just badly messed or badly represented in the movie right i did like the brutality they showed during the armor like the fighting sequence is muddy and all that and you're like it shows it's like oh everyone's wearing like full chain mail and you're like punching a dude you're not killing them or like you're just beating them until hopefully the armor gives away and it caves them or like you're just beating them until Hopefully that armor gives away and it caves in slightly and then you just hit him more with a hammer I feel like it would be like whose cardio is best who's like endurance is best and then I'm gonna stab you through the eye That's what the fighting feels have you guys ever seen those like full metal contact sports where I

Shit wild I knew some dude who did it and i'm just like yeah i kind of want to get into it but i also kind of don't want to get punched in the throat with a shield yeah oh god yeah when they're like some of that shit looks like it could be fatal they're taking like the guards on the swords just beat the shit out of their heads and stuff i'm like you're just punching somebody with like a fucking gauntlet yeah i don't know why people don't die like every tournament like i'm looking at some of these like you're taking a fucking metal shield and shoving it in someone's fucking jugular yeah like how how does it not like every time well to be fair it all be fatal if they just didn't wear the armor oh yeah i mean sure but back in the day what's even better it's like you're

breaking bones or you're getting affected it's like well sir sc, we have to cut his arm off now. He took a thorn. It's a bruise. He took a thorn to the finger. We have to. Oh, your blood's blood. We got to bleach it. That's the problem with all these wooden spears, the splinters. Oh, my God.

We've lost four men to gangrene today. Get the local whore down here to piss on the open wound. That shall clarify it. We're the leeches. Bless the water. And you're like, what the fuck? One of the, I forget which prince. That's what they did.

He got an arrow in the face. Yeah. And he survived. And it was like penetrated down his nasal cavity. And what they did back in, I think it was the 1400s. It's like, okay. So they stuffed it with leaves and salve, which naturally they were like, yo, this is what we put in this.

Put dirt in it. And it was like a two-day, three-day trip back to the kingdom. And then this is the first time they did a surgical removal of an arrow. A guy created it. You put it in the wound. You, like, shove it in. And then it opens up. So then you put another stick in to remove the arrowhead itself.

And it took, like, three attempts. And the prince is just, like, I'm guessing drunk at this time. And they're just cranky. In shock. Yeah, and they're, like, attempts and the prince is just like i'm guessing drunk at this time and they're just cranky shock yeah and they're like cleaning out the wound i was like god damn it and he's he didn't have pictures drawn of his right side of his face because it was so mangled but reconstructive surgery is a fairly modern practice as it turns out yeah and i was like truck month is on at Chevrolet. Get 0% financing for up to 72 months on a 2025 Silverado 1500 Custom Blackout or Custom Trail Boss. With Custom Trail Bosses available, class-exclusive Duramax 3-liter diesel engine

and Z71 off-road package with a 2-inch factory suspension lift, you get both on-road confidence and off-road capability. Dirt road ahead ahead let's go truck month is awesome ask your chevrolet dealer for details fuck dude back in the day it was just most brutal shit you watched the movie uh matt damon uh the last duel dude so good did you read about that and all the accounts are so different yeah i didn't read about it, but it was kind of like there's three sides to any story. You know what I mean? Your side, their side, and the truth.

So that was very fun. And then it kind of was interesting seeing the two different pathways of how someone was living, being liked by people as opposed to. It was crazy. Oh, perfect. And now we got this. Batty is just like, hey. It's my countryman.

I don't schedule when they come. If you can hear it, he scheduled the landscapers at the same time to film a podcast. I'm going to go yell at my cousins real quick. Yeah, right. We can go do it. That's fine. Yeah, Brandon. You might know one. I might know the other. We can take care of this. Sorry, audio listeners for

They can't hear that. Is that why the thing is peaking? Hold on. Oh, they can't hear that. Is that why the thing is peaking? Hold on. Oh, they can't hear it. Really? Shit. That is really loud for us. Can I take it back?

Dude, we're good. These mics are dope. Shirts are fucking really good. Have you seen the last duel? Either of you. No, I haven't. No, I haven't heard it, to be honest. The brutality in that fucking fight, though.

All the fights, you're like, oh, God. Hit someone in the base teeth and shit falling out like Stabbing in between armor of bra and it's a duel and you're like oh yeah This is what they did like this is literally how they live life back in the day Yeah, I'd rather shoot people to death and the girl that What's going on in it is someone there's grape happens. Some grape on the girl.

It's like, I got graped. Grape jam. So naturally the court's like, whoa, that's a big statement. First off your property. Cause you're a female. Yeah. Second. Yeah.

Calm down. Wench. Yeah. Literally. It's like, well, your husband and the other dude are going to have to fight. Then if your husband loses, we're going to fucking strip you. She's pregnant. By the way, we're going to strip you naked and burn you like burner at the stake and then if your husband loses we're gonna fucking strip you she's pregnant by the way we're gonna strip you naked and burn you like burn her at the stake and then hang the husband i think

what year was this 1980s this was texas yesterday this is right after they uh reappealed roe v way this is fucking crazy. But yeah, like, and you're like, oh yeah, this is how people thought. And she just had like, they put her on this, like, she was locked up and just stood in the middle of the duel and just had to watch and hope for the best. And you're like, get him, honey. Yeah.

You're like, brah. I'm curious what, like what legal precedent there would be for why she would have to get burned for her husband losing in a duel because she accused she said she got graped to be fair throughout all of human history grape was a pretty big thing

we kind of fixed that more or less recently yeah that was a recent problem 100 years or so that wasn't even mentioned in the movie though our history sucks. Humans aren't really good. It's not even about the grape. It's like, bro, that was his property. How dare

you? That's literally how it defiled another man's property. It's a man's honor, yeah. You don't come in another man's property. Like jerking off your buddy's sedan. And I like how we was doing. Also, I think I got the first come of the podcast. Like jerking off your buddy sedan Also, I think I got the first come of the podcast At least I had a good time

It's all I came here for yeah, that shit's fucking if you haven't watched that movie, it's a really good one. And then it's... I don't know many historical about... More Genghis Khan era is my nerd. Oh, really? I fucking love that shit. Genghis Khan is some pretty base shit. Dude, that dude was a savage. Speaking of grape...

He had the whole goddamn vineyard. That's one word for it. My man opened a winery. He was smashing all sorts of grapes. He reduced the carbon footprint from vaping. 30% of all grapes today are related from that vineyard. It's a fine vintage. A fine year it is.

A Mongolian 1263. Delightful. That is so uncomfortable. Fine vintage Talking about the non-consex I don't like this I'm good Like it what else do you nerd out on, bro? I got you a straw! Oh yeah, my bad. Well, obviously guns. So guns is the main, um... Huh! ...bread and butter.

But those are- those kill people. Well, that's the whole point, right? At least they don't grape. At least they don't grape. Well... People kill people. They're just the, uh, the tool kill people. They're just the tool. You haven't been to the parts of Reddit I have.

I have. I have been to those parts of Reddit. How long have you been under the firearm? I've been going on, I would say, hitting it pretty heavy for over a year and a half now. Fuck yes. What made you like, I'm choosing a balaclava? It was the level of plausible deniability from the last job.

So one thing, I'll give you guys this, and since you brought me on the podcast, I haven't talked about this, and people that know me know. Former Delta operator. Definitely not that cool. Medal of honor recipient.

Definitely not that cool. I'm just adding a resume. I was a former beat cop, so I just worked for a local PD, and it was at this really heightened time of political controversy going on in the country. What? That's never happened. How much of that was your fault?

Have you heard of angry cops in Buffalo? I have. And that guy's a stud. But no. So I'll give you guys this. Yeah. So essentially it started out with that. Being in law enforcement, I wanted to have a level of plausible deniability in case I shot someone in the line of duty.

And then they could look back at my social media and be like, this guy clearly wanted to shoot anybody. At least at the time, I thought I was doing the right move of like no face, no case. So, of course, they could easily like dox it and figure out who I would be. But at least I'd have that like in my head. The thought process was a shroud of deniable possibility. So that's how it spawned. And then, of course, as this thing became its own beast, I was like, I'm not going to go public yet.

It's nice to have a little bit of layer of privacy on the internet. And it's still a card I'm holding close to the chest if I ever want to go public. I do feel like sometimes there are certain projects I want to do where the mask can hold you back. And other times, I think it just kind of amplifies some of the other stories. I think it enhances it. Because if you're doing stuff like you do a lot of skits and LARP and shit,

where I think it's funnier because the balaclava is so out of place, but it's so distinct. It almost adds to the humor. Because you're not doing anything seriously. It's more all parody. Right. I do, if I'm being honest and kind of raw, I do worry about the optics long term of working professionally with other people.

Like, okay, you have this dude that's crazy. He's willing to do super edgy LARPs and then working with firearms. He's messed up. Usually the people that wear masks and guns are like the ones that are like, we want the whole show. Like, they're like dividing

the line flags in the background. It's not like the best optics, right? Or they're like, they're like, they're like divided little squiggly line flags in the background. Those are like, it's not like the best optics, right? Or they're like the IRA. It's very fun. Right, yeah. You've got like some dude's hair over here. You just see Admin like going like this. And then it like pans down and he's brushing his teeth.

And like. That's such a good. You missed a fucking spot. Throw the Live League banner in the corner. You're done. That's it, man. We're on it. Yeah.

That's all God. You're one of those Jordanian pilots in the cage and all of a sudden you see the live leak logo Oh, man, I know how this one ends Go away go away go away. Go. Hey, I was hoping for the corn hub sound You're the white girl on the couch. The rusty machete feels a little rough. A little more rough. Yeah. It's never a clean cut.

It was never a clean cut. The ISIS guys are pretty good about it. I haven't seen any of the new ones. It was just the old shit. I haven't seen the new model. I saw the OG. I took that portion of the internet off I'm good been there done that early 2000s were rough There was absolutely no censorship to where like cuz we hadn't figured that out yet

I remember being in fucking computer lab. What is it? What was it? I was maybe fifth grade bro, and like we all just like I watched We all just like watch Saddam hanging live pretty much. It was like, oh wow, okay. Cartel chains. Did that guy just die? A lot of cartel shit. Cartel, you're like, man ISIS ain't bad when you compare it to the cartel and you're like

I just realized that was a lot closer to Mexico. Yeah, we're real close. ISIS ain't bad. Eli, double tap. 2022. 2022. Oh, fuck. Isis ain't bad Eli double-tap I'm just your cancellation is possible. Just like anything They're big on great as well You're technically the white one at the table, We'll just put all the blame to you.

You know what? We don't know. We can't tell. We can't tell. He's Mexican. Those eyes don't say Mexican. He's black. Yeah, maybe.

Yeah, I thought so, right? I mean, I've seen his face. He's pretty black. Don't worry about face. He's black If for the viewers out there that can't see a baddie leaned over look under the table Professional so guns YouTube right you get what you got into the game a year and a half ago? Yeah, I'd say so. Why did you start a YouTube channel?

I love making YouTube videos, man. Okay. Before this, was there a previous YouTube channel? There was a private YouTube channel. It was like my name and my persona attached to it, but I nuked it when I went to the PD. And then when I started this private one, it was kind of like a fun cathartic release from like the actual stressful shitty job that law enforcement was and I wanted to have like this fun spirit I wanted to be like a good like separation because what I saw a lot of guys doing within the firearm space was they always take themselves super duper serious like they're

like saying like they're waiting for the president's call be like hey dude hey Sam we need you to come a little kick whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa. You got Garantham? Yeah, Garantham. No, he's Brandon. Hey, the fuck, man? Honestly, I feel like that's why guys like us kind of started taking off is because we weren't in the super like, you know, we're decent at what we do, but it's not like super

tactical and you got to shave 3.4 grams off of this, blah, blah, blah of this blah blah blah it's like no we just fuck around have fun just laugh at ourselves and others i'll shoot 99 of people on flip-flops and whatever gun you give me yeah but i'm not gonna give a shit or be like but i'm like i'll wear the pink cat ears at the range i get so many comments about that it's like what kind of I figured out everything I need to know about this guy from the fact that he wears flip-flops at a gun range. I'm like, yeah, that I, I live in Texas and I value comfort. Wendy's most important deal of the day has a fresh lineup.

Pick any two breakfast items for $4. New four-piece French toast sticks, bacon or sausage wrap, biscuit or English muffin sandwiches, small hot coffee, and more. Limited time only at participating Wendy's Taxes Extra. And I'm a gig of fucking Chad. Weapons if a shell falls on your foot.

It falls off. It falls off. Exactly. I go like this. Oh, that was uncomfortable for 0.5 seconds. But weapons if you get shot in the foot. Well, I don't think my Nikes were going to stop it anyways. So I'll be fine.

Toes gone anyways. In fact, it's easier to access for first aid if there's no shoe around it to get infected and get into the wound. You need to start wearing flip-flops to the range is what we're getting at. Yeah, flip-flops. I'm actually coming back around.

That's the ultimate tactical garment, much like the turtleneck. I was trying to start the paleo range diet where I just wear nothing to the range. That's all. Just like dueling naked? Yeah. Like that whole like play care battle belt, but naked train how you fight slightly hungover Drunk and rocked up. Let's go! The man bricked up! Stumbled out of his bedroom. We know! Fired three rounds.

We can see it! Just drunk and stumbled. It's invading my airspace! Like, what gun am I gonna get you in, bird? You shot him with a boner. It hasn't gone away. Yeah, I apologize about this. It rather got enlarged after.

Engorged, if you will. Your Honor, you're speaking from a position of someone who's never had a wargasm. It's like a combo between a rage boner and a fear boner. You never know. It's a a combo between a rage boner and a fear boner. You never know. It's a fine line. That is the grave for which I exist in. So this is our podcast. It's a lot of dick, a lot of cum.

It's about gaming, but this... Do you play video games? Oh, yeah. What? What? What? What? What? What? Stop it.

What? Stop it. What? Shut the fuck up. Just turn the mic down. No, it's fine. It's like, oh, yeah, this is intriguing. Tell me more.

You're like, shut the fuck up. What? Okay, what's your go-to game right now? Right now. So, I've been playing

a lot of Halo Reach at the moment. Oh, okay. Reach is fucking amazing. Yeah, Grantham and I have been playing

a lot of Halo Reach together. Are you name dropping? I am, doing a little clout chasing. He's usually the one that's like,

hey dude, get this game or get that game. So, we've been doing a lot of Halo Reach. Halo Reach, SWAT, takes me back to my junior high era, dude. Oh my god, SWAT, yeah. So good.

Placing those headshots, man. Halo Reach has probably had some of the most satisfying kills. Halo Reach is amazing. The combat mechanics in Halo, Destiny, I will always say the gunplay plane combat mechanics are like bar none some fucking dope ass shit Not the new one though Which one the new one the new hell infinite? Oh, yeah, new halo is kind of like in the campaign doesn't feel like halo. No it stopped being hello after Yeah

Honestly reach was probably the last best halo was reached before after ODST Was it after is that ODST was like kind of like oh yes, he was I think it was like what do you call that? DLC almost for Halo 3 like yeah the same everything and just it was just a hell jumper I can't loved it. I lived by ship that fucking insanity. I couldn't get into that game really It was it was a lot harder Which is the fucking point that was why I like that was like you're no longer an invincible war machine

You're just some fucking you're human Yeah, but I'm Hormgy Goop Cortana Goop Blue Woman That's all you go to Spartan school for Is for the Cortana I'm Hormgy Like bro admin made it all the way

Through Spartan training just to jerk off On Cortana Cortanga come back I'm Hormgy She's like She's like Cortana Teleporting the John, we know it's you. Master Chief, he's like, no. John, stop running around naked, but with a helmet.

Cortana! It's actually more unsettling when it's just the helmet. I'm horny. Horny. Like, I was going to pass Spartan training, but horny. Have you seen the new Cortana? Yeah I would have dropped out of Spartan school That's your deterrent

You were a big L.A. Finally got to be a Spartan I'm no homie no more Okay what skins do we have? Can I get that 2001 skin? Big ass Homie no more. Okay, what skins do we have? Hey titty Cortana, that's gonna be dope The UNSC mod community is shit Dude this guy's just drinking up the gravity the jiggle effects. Oh man Halsey was a bitch We're not Spartans One of many reasons why. This is the determining factor. A little 500 years is a little too soon.

Batty has heart attacks, so he can't be one. Strokes, not heart attacks. Oh, strokes. The worst thing. That's what blind. You'd be a terrible Spartan. It was like a minor fake stroke thing. It wasn't a real stroke. Batty's dream is having a stroke.

Called the bondulant. It just falls over sometimes. It'sant. I just fall over sometimes. It's okay. I just walk and I'm like, well, here we go. Batty's a fucking Spartan. He just runs in circles because he can't control one side of his body. That's not how that works. It's not like a tank or like a zero turn.

It's like my leg. Your leg's not a track. connection to the body, dude. Your leg's not a track, you have to move it still. I don't know. When you can't move one leg, you don't go in a circle, you just fall the fuck over. We'll see, Batty. Spartan Batty. I've seen it, I've done it!

I've fallen over! We'll see. I just don't believe you. I don't believe you. Quiet, you're lying. I don't believe you. You're lying. I don't have any reason to believe you're not lying to me. What other games other than Halo? A lot of Minecraft.

Really? Is that a joke? No. After I do my fighting and my Halo swap battles, I like to go to my peaceful farm where I just... Grape Village. There it is. I love that. There it is. Had us in the first half. great village Had us in the first half I just picture your Steve characters like Villages run inside in, closes the door. Steve Horngate! Little block light kicking open the door.

That's just that all you're done? Yeah. 64 loaves of bread for one emerald. What the fuck? Bullshit. Oh my god. Yeah, I had to breed my horses, ride around, frolic in the sun, build a nice cabin, steal a villager, make them my sex slave. Dude, that's the best you can force mate them. So dope. Yeah.

You didn't know that, Batty? The villagers? Yeah, if you put them together they fucking you force they make babies Villagers yeah, then you grape is like literally a game mechanic. Yeah, yeah, it's like teaching you how to be like an ancient Like I don't know if you guys are joking anymore. No, it's actually I knew you could with like animals and shit But no the villagers you can force some fucking my app now and then you take their baby and you this is my god Does that talk to us? Yeah? Holy shit back when I was in high school me and my buddies all had a minecraft server

but it was on xbox because we didn't have PCs yet because we're poor and We actually all pulled in money bought actually we had our buddies friend by our buddies brother buying their Xbox And we modded the Xbox to always be on So we always had a live server because you couldn't have the only way you could ever play minecraft with your friends is if your buddy was on playing on that server so we had a dummy account that was just constantly walking in a circle so it didn't time out and we had a modded xbox just to make a minecraft server and i built the mines of moria and it was the greatest thing I've ever done my entire life. He does take So what are you moving to Texas?

I gotta find a bridge to live under. Why? I don't know. I don't know if I can honestly do Texas. Why? Well, he's sleeping on my couch right now and I went upstairs and checked on him and he was sleeping under it. He's not joking.

Yeah. There's a bridge right down the road. I turned on the light and he hissed at me so I ran away. It was quite frightening. It was before my time to come up. It's my graping bridge. You don't pay the toll.

The grape toll. What is that? Getting the most boys all the toll. The grape toll. What is that? The troll toll to get to most boys. Yeah, boy toll. Exactly. Yeah. Sonny. Always Sonny.

Hey, man. Ha ha. Hey, two of the night men. Ha ha. Son. The greatest. The greatest. That's the best episode of TV

So many fucking classics Fucking Minecraft We had our You burnt all my pigs to the ground Oh yeah me and Eli played Minecraft together I had what they called An unethical farm There might have been

It was like a 4x4 square with like 50 pigs in it For one It's full of people When we had like a 10 by 10 and I had like 400 it was a bad and then foreign to sheep in the next one Yeah, and baddies like drops of one piece of fire of magma the the the the flint where you go And just light shit on fire, and it was one is like all the animals

Like wildfire, and I'm building my house, and I look through my window Oh no! He's like sheep while you're on fire! Oh no! Batty's like, uh, uh... He's just like, I'm just imagining this farmer just looks out his window, entire life's works, just livestock, everything's burning in the ground, just, uh... Oh, cool!

The pickaxe. For the longest time I would just walk around With that little lighter Just lighting the grass Around it on fire Just trying to fuck with Eli And then I accidentally I remember I didn't even

Do it on purpose I accidentally lit Like the cow Or like the fence on fire And then it was just like All the animals I'm like I hate it When I accidentally

Light cows on fire It really really Bums you out you know Good news when they die the steak's already cooked yeah the shit there was a lot of steaks those sheep went up like a fucking the lamb yeah that was them meals ready to eat right there there's just fucking literally that's all it was it's just a meat minecraft man minecraft is like a turn your brain off and just four days later you're like

You lose all recognition of time and space Dude, yeah, and you get to plan stuff without the FBI knowing so it's a nice like in Minecraft safe space in Minecraft Yeah, it's planning blocks fantastic Everything's in Minecraft yeah, my crashes is awesome. I don't get it. I love grape in Minecraft. Steve Riney. Stingholm Gage. His soulless eyes. Sad villager noises.

But it's that Minecraft music Why am I getting graped to this? This is more uncomfortable I feel like you could turn that into a horror trailer, just like the slow panning out with the music Just that one low bass line then the normal Minecraft music All the villagers are like needing a Grape by Steve How are we to stop this grapist? This village has a dark past. One village, one man.

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The Tales of Steve. What the fuck? Oh, shit. Speaking of Hormgee, how do you do it? No, you. No, you do it. You've never done one.

Yes, I have. I was starting. I handed it off. Exactly. You've never done one. Do the ad spot, Eli. This is a great ad read. Hello. I am an ad, ad reader.

I am reading you this ad agilely. Now, ad spacing ad. Out of regs. Out of regs, adding space of adding. What else? With the C. With the what? Admin.

With the Z. Out of regs with the Z. Out of regs with the Z. All right, guys, everyone. Here we have our out of regs ad spot. Please go to outofregs.com and use code unsub. Is it just unsub now or unsub20? Or cum20.

Or cum20. It was cum20. Yeah. To check out the new smooth operator pomade. It's also a body wash and a shampoo and conditioner. And soon, Batty's going to have his own Flava Flav. There will be a new baddie Scent coming to out of rags again out of rags with a Z

So use code unsub grab your pomades beard oils mustache wax Shampoos conditioners and everything else you love to put in and around your face boom and it smells fucking dope Eli thanks for that input at the end of the artery T. I passed it off in a way you Yeah, he's getting his fucking brand new Don't use that one. Fucking luscious. Don't use that one. I love that one. No, I meant that particular can.

What? This is the go-to. What'd you do to it? Wait, what'd you do to it? It's cum. It's always cum. It's definitely cum. Close this bag up.

It smells really good. Actually, there's nothing. Yeah, this one I really like. That one smells good. That's the noon. That's the noon- good. There's nothing you thought this one. I really like that one smells good That's the noon. That's the new new what's wrong with your come now? This one's my favorite smelling it doesn't have that pearlescence of come you know Medium shine come not a high Everyone's good everyone's looking fucking clean Out of ranks calm Go get yours today

Okay What were we talking about? I don't know I ruined it Thanks Eli Being raped by Steve What other games do you like? Where did you start? What was your first console?

So I have older brothers I'm the youngest of all my siblings. I'm my older brother. I'm 25 Oh my god, you're a fucking baby. Your first system was a Nintendo 64. No, well, maybe playing like Mario It's like PlayStation 2 it probably was in 64 like cousins or older siblings. Yeah Probably was in a Mario mine was too and i'm 32 oh yeah but you know my brother i remember my brothers i remember vividly being like young and my brothers are like a good age gap they came home with like the og xbox and halo combat oh yeah oh so that was like that was like kicking it off and i remember like so growing up like within the christian household like i remember in that time point when everyone was like dude halo's making a bunch of murderers out of these kids, man.

Which is hilarious because it's like the most, what do you call it, just anti-Muslim game of all time. Halo. Think about it. It came out right after 9-11. It's about a cult of aliens in another far-off place who have a suicide cult and The American military has to go out and stop them before they blow themselves up and kill us all

Literally it's jihadist The game goes so hard that's why I love that fucking that was the only we're allowed to play in school We were we were able to can because like you we couldn't play Call of Duty We would have like game nights and shit in this because I was in a animation Oh, yeah, we have game nights ever like for Friday night or whatever We don't hang out and play fucking games. The only one we'd get away with though was halo for shooters because it's aliens It's there's no blood. Yes. It's not even it's totally not real and there's no red blood in that cam Is there even when you shoot the Marines? I don't think there's blood

In Halo 1. Yeah, I don't think soines i don't think there's blood in halo one yeah i don't think so because you can send the bodies like flying i thought you'd like if you like splatter or whatever like you fall from i thought you could beat the dead bodies and they still yeah well the covenant one's a hundred percent they'll just splatter like their purple pink gear everywhere the blues are great colors i love that game that was like the og and at you you played at like 5 years old You're using both hands to move one of the joysticks On the old juggernaut

What were those called? The OG Xbox controller It had a special name I forget what they were called The Duke Remember how big those fucking things were? Like those Moving forward and turning At the same time It was like driving a caterpillar Yeah, remember how big those fucking things were like don't

Move it forward and turn it at the same time is like driving a bug, bro? What the fuck? I'm like, are bugs like the big fat caterpillar, I guess? Like, that's weird. What are we? Oh, the tractor. Oh. Like, he grew up poor.

He was just playing with bugs and shit. Like, I used to shove him in the back and be like, go forward and turn. I am not a smart man. But yeah, the Duke fucking. Duke. That was, so that's your OG. What are your like your first games? Are you like, yo, okay, you got the Xbox, the Nintendo 64, but what are those like childhood imprints where you're like gaming?

Gaming. Oh, dude, I think doing like LAN parties with your buds, man. LAN party, Halo stuff. That was my jam i do remember of course monorail fear 2 that was revolutionizing the way like being the young guy that i was i probably kick-started my my uh love affair with firearms also added some stuff to my vocabulary as well yeah well let me rephrase that not just monorail fear 2 but the first call duty 4 because there was always a world war 2 shooter before and it it was always like, oh, World War 2 guns, of course.

They're cool. But then with the Modern Warfare 2 coming out, that was like, I think what came back in 07, that I would have been like 11 when that game came out. I was in 06, I think. I was in war when you were 11. Yeah, no, it's... I'm no longer the young man.

I know, not now. I'm an old dude. Well, I mean, it was just... Those made probably the largest imprint. They were fantastic. Those old games, I didn't get to play that until... Was that the end of deployment? Yeah, literally, I was like, end of deployment,

and we're finally on the chill part, and we're actually on the fob, and I just got back from mid-tour leave so we were about to go back out to the cobs and they had the mwr like gaming space for the people that lived at the big fob i was like yo played that was like video fucking dope as shit what is this holy fuck this is dope we're doing this irl i know well and that's the crazy thing you see like all the people they're like playing like, excited and walking around and, like, oh, my God.

They, like, see us just beat to shit. Like, we had our guns. They're dirty as fuck. And they're like, oh, my God, you leave the wire? I'm like, yeah. Like, I don't live in the wire. It's like, you guys get a stay in the wire? Yeah, exactly.

Like, bro, you're getting paid? Bro, you don't have to leave this house? Yeah, exactly. Because you're getting paid? Bro, you don't have to leave this place? You just go here? You're playing the game. You're like, hey, that kebab joint, that's right down the road. Yeah, yeah, I know that one. That's great. But it's crazy seeing that difference.

And when that's all their job is, they just live there. I'm like, I mean, fucking, you are smart. You get paid the same as me. I'm the retarded one. Hey, poor kids. You are smart. Yeah. You get paid the same as me. I'm the retarded one. Yeah. So poor kids, would you like to fight and die for a 10% discount at Denny's?

Hey, free one day a year. You get 10% discount. I think there's a lot of veteran. Fuck with me right now. Is that actually, yeah. Veterans.

You get a lot of discounts everywhere. The non vets. Like Brandon, is that true? Fuck. Yeah, veterans, you get a lot of discounts everywhere. He asks the non-vets. Like, I don't fucking know. Yeah, he's looking at you. Brandon, is that true? Fuck yeah, probably. America. Ding. Yes.

Let's circle back. Super informed. I saw it on the news. Has to be true. Oh, man. What was the last game okay was that you got fucking Halo yeah what other one is just like Battlefield series dude Battlefield series Battlefield 1

was the best Battlefield I think they made wait okay Battlefield 1942 that's my OG but I mean World War 1 battlefield one was probably my favorites I don't know if you consider one the best but I think it'd be no battle Towards the top by top three easy you didn't know so back man you were 42 I did for two was why you ever play that one? Yeah, this is back in like the fucking that's was that like the Pacific one

No, this is This is what we Counter-Strike era time? I don't know. Counter-Strike 1 era. A time frame of when it came out. It's old. I was talking about the Pacific. Was it Pacific Theater?

Was that the one you were on like midway? Germany and both, I think. I mean, you had maps from both. I thought they had like North Africa maps too. Yeah, I think so. It was crazy. I just remember the windmill level. That's like the only one that's really...

The windmill level of World War II? 1942. Well, in Battlefield 1942, it was one of the only maps. It was a giant windmill. It was a windmill of friendship. An actual windmill. Yeah, it was a giant windmill. It was like a wooden...

Yeah, it was a giant... That's where the snipers were. That's all I always remember. Like, those fucks are up there. We got to shoot them. Or I'd run up there and be one of the snipers were that's all I always remember like those fucks are up there We got to shoot them or I'd run up there and be one I like battle 1942 my favorite call of duty was probably Call duty 1492 Where you discover America and kill all the natives? Yeah, it's a classic classic weird It's like a hold hold the F key to a sneeze on the locals

Like your grenade is just a blanket the F key to a sneeze on the locals. Weapon of mass destruction. And then you just wait. Like your grenade is just a blanket. Oh no, it's ours blanket. Now you wait six months in game. You win the battle. Rest for six months. Good thing they taught us what corn is because we would not be surviving this winter.

And turkeys. Hey, that Pocahontas is pretty thick. She thick with two Cs. Columbus Hongi. John Smith. John Smith, Hongi, Pocahontas. At what point are we not going to be allowed to watch Pocahontas anymore? When is that movie going to be just canceled?

Has it been? It's got to be. It's pretty based in several parts of it. They literally entire song and dance numbers about savages, savages. Holy shit. I forgot. They went fucking hard. Disney goes hard in the paint.

Disney will be like, yeah, this is okay still. Yeah, but man, Disney's like 20s to the 40s. We don't talk about this. Nice mustache, Walt. Walt wasn't a fan of most people. Most people. Children are good.

I just feel like they don't really have Walt's original vision in mind anymore. I'm like, well, yeah, he's got Jews running his company. I think he might have had some things to say about that. He wasn't a fan of a lot of it. That's my favorite Family Guy clip when they go like, oh, I'm dressed so I feel so happy. I'm so colorful, Brian. And then the Jewish guy in Family Guy

The red I know you talking about when he comes in about different skits. Yeah. Well, he walks in there all dressed as Disney characters Have you seen that one? No, I don't think so Oh, bro, when they're all dressed as like the art style is done in Disney format. So it's all no family guy Oh, oh, no, I see where this is going. Yeah, the Jewish guy's like, hey guys. And then they're like, Jews! And then Brian and Stuart are like, I had time to go back to our time. Forgot about the whole Jewish thing.

I like the one where they go to, they're visiting Auschwitz. And then they talk about like, well, you know, Walt Disney, blah, blah, blah. Like, and they brought tune, tune, tune, tune. They do the whole castle thing. It's like, oh, yeah, and don't ride the train ride. Like, fuck.

Oh, no, no, no, no. Like a family guy. Man, we live in a different time now. Dude, those were jokes that they made, like, ten years ago, and you can't do that shit Ten years is wild. I will die on the hill of retard. I won't let them take that. No. You've taken a lot hill of retard. I won't let them take that. No.

You've taken a lot of fucking words that I really enjoyed. And yeah, retard's where I'll make my stand. I'll get canceled over that. That's your word. You're like, oh. Dude, I want. What is ginger? It's our word.

It's ginger if you're not, you know. I'm a ginger. I can hard heart it all day. Long Beach Griffey is the one dude I want on this podcast. If you've not. Who the fuck is Long Beach Griffey? Bro, sounds like a crackhead. Bro, his content.

Like that sounds like, oh, careful. There's Long Beach Griffey over there. Panhandling on the side. Long Beach Griffey's got his dick out again. No idea. Everyone's like, no idea how this dude has not get canceled. Cause he goes fucking. Like we talking hard in the iDubbbz?

Oh, yeah. He makes iDubbbz look like PG-13. Like, go on. Like, his video. Well, first you had my answer. I'm not showing anything. I'm showing the timer to his videos while this. Play another fucking video on your phone on this podcast.

We can't. We can't do that. I'm just showing the last video because. Oh, he's black. He can get away with it. He can get away with anything. Oh, wow. Wait.

I have seen this guy's stuff. I have actually seen him before. Yeah. Like. He's the guy with the huge gap between his teeth. And that goes a completely different way than you think it's going to go. That's his new video he just put out, the top one. Oh, I've seen.

Oh, he's funny as fuck. Yeah. I want that dude on the fucking pod. Holy shit. His videos are fucking. Oh, yes. Absolutely. Like, not PC at all.

Like, he goes, just. Have you seen any of his stuff? No, but I'm going to research this. You need you It's cool. The first one was when might be won't commit mass shooting He don't give a fuck clearly not do he goes I was like man, oh he did that today Okay, that was yesterday's post or he was sitting on a banger and he's just like i'm just gonna wait for another white kid to go crazy yeah do his wife he has a school uh when uh when you're teaching the school shooter how like when you're educating the school shooter he's like okay uh come hang out we'll have a discussion on okay math and it goes oh god all his stuff i'm like oh god bless this is the comedy that needs to happen nope no more

no more fun no the math so mr so-and-so uh if i had a 123 grand projectile literally moving at 3 000 feet per second if i had yeah he does that with 30 rounds he's like if i have a 15 round magazine in classrooms, 45 people! And you're like, holy shit, bro. How many reloads am I going to have to do? And the teacher's like, ha, ha. And you're like, Jesus Christ, bro. Good. Good.

Well, at least our schools ain't a fucking shooting gallery. School! Fucking, I ran into Theo Vaughn. i still have no idea who this is saturday he's pretty big he does like rogan and whatnot yeah i ran into him fucking saturday and then monday on my flight home i was with um chris oh the other comedian, Chris. Good talk. Chris, what's his name? D'Ella. Oh, Chris D'Elia.

The guy who was fucking kids. Yeah. What? Yeah, he got in trouble for that shit. He was like Snapchat's with like 16-year-old chicks kind of thing. When? Like a year or two. A year or two ago. My favorite part, though, is the podcast he was on where he found out they were talking

about Snapchat and he's just like, well, how'd they find it? Oh my God, yeah. How'd they find it? Well, it was on Snapchat. Yeah, but Snapchat, like the whole point, it goes away. He's like, no, there's ways you can save it. And it's just like a cut in on his face because they cut in on that one video. He just goes.

I need to talk to my lawyer yeah i just realized oh i didn't hear about this you didn't yeah it was a whole yeah and his he didn't even do his response was like i have a sex problem hey yeah you're supposed to say i didn't do it yeah i I'm We're past that for him good god are Kelly. Yeah, yeah, it was passed, but there were 1617 which apparently wherever state it was it wasn't Illegal so it's just a classic a lawsuit. Oh, well if it's not illegal go for it like dude Don't let your dreams be dreams like if it's legal? No. I said if it's legal.

If it's legal. Hold on real quick. You got to remember also we're younger too. So that's not as big of an age gap. So dude, even then i'm like seven years a 17 year old i'm like what am i gonna talk about it's not any i mean how was fourth period would you have oh that is not what i thought oh never mind like how was your first i got I got it! I got it!

I guess technically it could've worked either way. Could've worked either way. And this is the one that does it. This is the one! Wow, just like that, canceled off the bat. Yeah, Donut's not here. Spawn kill. Donut's not here. Oh, you're all involved in it. Yeah, you guys are in Nissan. You can go underground. Spawn kill.

Just remember, I'm not gonna shave the rest of my beard off. Oh god. Oh, yeah, buddy. You got a beard that could be incognito Hmm. Yeah, I was like that he got his yeah. Yeah the tattoos are doing yeah, yeah, yeah hiding from anyone. Yeah, I really did kind of Fuck for the dude with fucking hearts on his fingers Is all you have to do I can just go full Danny Worsop and block him out Cause I'm a shame that I wrote fuck myself What do you have on his knuckles? Fuck this, fuck that Fuck this or fuck

One of those words But he was a young kid, he was a rock star This is a rock star, he's a kid I love it I don't see what's wrong with it unless I'm thinking four letter words Fuck this, fuck kids no. Fuck kids. Yeah, okay, that's not good. Wouldn't do that.

Block them out real quick. We'll swap them around. It says kids fuck. Oh, that's worse. No, no. No. Yeah, any identified tattoos for you? I got no tats yet.

I have a few ideas that I want. Bro, I'm thinking an Azob battalion. That's that's you right there Okay, so just watch the car apparently that's a bad idea Okay, big for big turns out big turn off bit women apparently don't like that unless they also have one themselves I don't know Argentine Argentine and Tinian women love that. Yeah, for whatever reason. I don't know why I couldn't pronounce that. That was a good joke. That was real good. I like that. That was a three-layer joke.

Historical. It was good if I could actually pronounce the name of the country. That would be fucking cool. Argentinian? Argentinian? Okay, what is it? Argentinian? Argentine?

Argentine? I like Argentine. Argentine. Is it a paint? Mexi-Nazis? I don Argentine. Argentine. The Argentines? Is it a paint you put on? Mexi-Nazis? I don't know what you call them. Mexi-Can?

Mexi-Kine? It's Argentine. It's Mexi-CAN! Argentine. Argentine. Argentine. There it is. Is it Argentine?

Yeah, we were just saying that, right? Yeah. You're like five different phases. We covered this. I don't fucking know. You said Argentine. In the comments below, please! Tell us how we pronounce this! Yeah, that's the time oh we give him a superpower the offenders

So well we don't give you a superpower. No, daddy explain it. Okay, so we have a super group. It's called the offenders All right, all of us have superpowers like we have Eli here the brown streak. He is the fastest man on the planet But unfortunately every superpower there's a drawback because we're not like the avengers we're not tier you know that top tier shit we're not good we're not good mine's not a good my i like don't don't this is always like the fucking leading one because hold on we super speed but anytime he's using said super speed he's shitting himself just like a brown streak yeah not because he's mexican but it's and because i'm mexican yeah and he's mexican okay donuts uh can fly don't even just fly in all the place but to maintain flight he has to shout racist shit racial slurs that one feels pretty easy yeah i do that i do that anyway so it's really pretty funny i played mom with her

too yeah he just puts on his fucking burger king crown and i swear to fucking god if one more Anyway, so it's really On the internet tells me I was never in a modern warfare to lobby like that. I'm like you're full of shit and you're lying bro Constantly all over everywhere on Twitch like I've never been in lobby like that. You're a lying of you're a liar i still i have i play war zone still and i'm still in lobbies like that back then it was a different time that was accepted and encouraged yeah you're like oh my god so my superpower is i have super strength or i'm super loud we talked about everything either way it doesn't matter the drawback is no matter what when i'm using said ability i'm just coming uncontrollably yeah so if he saves children oh it's a problem it's a lawsuit right there it's like mind control yeah um what else what else

happened i mean you got mind control you got invisibility you got teleportation yeah so what's yours what's your new one we'll tell you if it's been used before or not. Brandon kills himself. But I will never die. Like a flood depressed Deadpool. He sleeps forever. Oh, that's the one for this episode? Yeah, it was the one.

He sleeps forever. It wasn't the swastikas or the raping. It was the... Yeah, we're fine with that. Okay. Just bleeps. Yeah, that's we're fine with that. Okay, just bleeps Yeah, that's cool. We like that. Yeah, that's good. Keep this into YouTube This tough man, it's tough stuff is tough power like I'm like deliberately thinking about this like this is actually gonna happen What if you could succeed on YouTube but couldn't show your face? Oh

Already got your power. Well. Oh, God. God damn. And that segment's over. On to the next one. Oh, God. Pain. Emotion on damage. Emotion.. Emotional damage. It hurts dude, it hurts. I'm really horny, but... I don't like the way this one's going, we're just stopping it here.

Well come on, what's your super power? Let's go! Alright, let's see, let's see, let's see. Laser vision. Laser vision. Oh, Cyclops, okay. Superman, Cyclops, I got it. I like it.

I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it.

I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I's see. Let's see. Let's see Laser vision. Oh, oh Cyclops. Okay Superman Cyclops. I got a lie kid. Mm-hmm. You can't see titties again. Oh no. I can feel them though. You're like, I'm cut! Burn! There's a knock at the door. Hi, we're from the Church of the Latter Day Saints. Would you mind-

Is that meme with the red eye? It's literally just a meme where it's like, dude, you're terminally based. That's good. There it is. He's got laser vision. Always on, though.

He just has to walk around like this. What did I tell you, son? Oh, dad. Dad. He's just like, whoa. I'll do it. That ain't a bad one. Well, it's not a good one.

Being blind kind of sucks. Hey. Do I get to see while I'm shooting my laser beams? Yeah, that's the only time you can see, though. Oh, dude. I just stared at the sun. A whole new reason for killing hookers. Yeah. Brand, what do you mean a new reason?

What, like there wasn't one before? I just picture you trying to sneak peeks even though this is connected to your retinas actually you're like She just kept them in concert happy like fuck well, that's way less hot now No, I He cuts her in half, he's like, fuck. Well, that's way less hot now. Did you cut this girl in half? No. I mean, it's very clear indicating two burn marks going this way. And also, why did they go straight through her tits? Yeah. Well, and it looks like you looked around shamefully for three seconds.

Judging from the burns in the ground behind her corpse. And then they turned off right there Wasn't me wasn't who did that somebody should really stop that guy Four more women I find attractive end up dead. Oh, my God. Oh, he's just fucking. Oh, the power would actually suck probably the most. That'd be pretty bad.

You're blind. Yeah. Can I just come every time? Nah. I didn't make up my power. These guys did. I don't know how I got lucky. I really did.

It's like, man, I'm had a bad day. There's no downside Not even that's just what Jim bros do anyway. He's picking up toilet paper at this point That's what Jim bros do anyway, it's just sitting there coming on the bench press rack Coming so good I go home. I'm coming. I'm in the gym. I'm coming you see how it's like I'm in heaven all the time because I'm just constantly coming Any big projects coming up just the the the LARPs man, it's always a larp stain on top of them We're probably hit the range tomorrow. It will do the forbidden fruit larp. Yep the forbidden LARP the forbidden Oh, man, you guys are doing it. Oh, yeah, I need to fucking I'm so bad at watching people's content. You should occasionally I'm so bad y'all's videos both you because it's always one after the fucking other

Cuz Mike's are too long, but hear that Mike yeah But I enjoy mics though. I enjoy mics 1am. I watch every fucking video still. Every single one. I have a problem. I'm enjoying his How to Be Deadly series. The whole helmets, the recce shit,

the urban survival. It's kind of neat. A lot of people seem to be enjoying those. I love his hypothetical. He's like well This is just let's just say that the place that you're a guerrilla Militiamen is based out of the continental United States for absolutely no reason just as I country hypothetically speaking in Minecraft

Now kiss no fucking kiss Don't mind if we do. Matt would have kissed him. Yeah. This podcast ends with two dudes just banging while we talk. Hormie. Hormie. Cortunga.

Oh, he showed his face. The other balaclava. The other balaclava? The other balaclava? On the other head. Oh, I was just. Oh, no. I don't like this picture at all. That's when you reveal yourself.

Three dudes around you. Horny. It's just like, it's the balaclava of Bukkake. Bukkake still can't see his face. The balaclava of Bukkake. That's where I face The balaclava Bukkake That's where I'm at in life right now That sentence right there How you doing?

I'm like, well, balaclava bukkake Hey man, how you doing? Yeah Yeah Oh, we need to do Okay, I need to watch fucking the LARPing videos Because I have no idea in my head what these fucking look like so for one i just i'll give you a brief description so for one i

just did i did the idf larp which is uh we shot a child in gaza yeah and it got the strip club so that that was that was one of the gotta warn somebody before you drop those Yeah With some of this stuff you just gotta lean into it And commit man with some of this stuff You can't be like well I know it's a politically Controvert you just gotta be like alright today we are

SS marching into frame and we are going To have the proper video so you just gotta Go full send So when I ask to actually be A permanent host because I need an income Source because our video gets my account taken down. Oh, you already get us canceled. Nice. Yeah.

I'll have like the Thanos collection of canceled channels. Last one. Okay, so that sounds actually fucking dope. I am a fan from YouTube headquarters. And so we just got back. All the gun tubers are like, I don't feel so good. I am from YouTube headquarters All the gun tubers What is it mr.. Matt? I don't feel so good Mr.. Character, I don't feel so good. Oh

No, no, baddie Do your fucking thing? Wait, do we no we'll do it no before or after okay get it thank you for watching this podcast as always we have eli double tap donuts not here today as you can tell i am baddie streams we have our part time co-host brandon herrera the

guy and our very, very, very special guest. Administrative results. Please tell everybody where we can find you on the internet. You can find me on YouTube at AdministrativeResults or on Instagram, AdministrativeResults. I am probably shadow banned on Instagram, though. I also have a Twitter. You have a Twitter?

I do have a Twitter. I love Twitter. All right, I'm going to have to... Twitter's cool. We'll get on there. Twitter fucks now. Twitter fucks now. Dude, Twitter is fucking fun now.

I was like, oh, thank God. Verified, by the way. Are you now? Finally. How'd you get it? They won't even let you apply unless you're over the 100K. So as soon as I got over, I applied. It was like two days.

Imagine being verified with only 36K. Oh, that's me. I know. Damn. All around me are familiar. Thank you for watching the podcast. See you next time or something. Cheers!

Oh, perfect. And now we got this. Batty... Batty's just like, hey, also... It's my countryman. I don't schedule when they come. If you can hear it, he scheduled the landscapers at the same time to film a podcast. I'm gonna go yell at my cousins real quick.

Yeah, right, we can go do it. Yeah, Brandon, you might know one, I might Yeah, right. We can go do it. That's fine. Yeah, Brandon, you might know one, I might know the other. We can take care of this. Sorry, audio listeners for... They can't hear that. Is that why the thing is peaking? Hold on.