Unsubscribe Podcast - 84 - Are we Poor? ft. Kevin Brittingham & BrandonHerrera

Episode Date: December 15, 2022

Unsubscribe Podcast Ep84 - Are we Poor? ft. Kevin Brittingham & @BrandonHerrera THE HONEY BADGER -er- THE CREATOR OF THE HONEY BADGER KEVIN BRITTINGHAM IS HERE AND ALL HE DOES IS BALL. Also, I think we may be poor, or at least Kevin makes us feel that way. BUT DOES HE HAVE DRAGONS TO GO WITH HIS CASTLE? ----------------------------- CHECK OUT TODAY'S VIDEO SPONSORS, GHOSTBED Right now GhostBed is offering 30% off everything if you use the code - UNSUBSCRIBE at checkout or visit https://www.ghostbed.com/pages/unsubscribe Adam & Eve - Go to http://www.adameve.com, select any one item. Use code UNSUB, U-N-S-U-B This is an exclusive offer specific to this podcast so be sure to support our show and use this code UNSUB to get you not just the 50% Off, but also the 100% Free Shipping - Code UNSUB! Go to Adam and Eve dot com right now! ----------------------------- GO CHECK OUT KEVIN BRITTINGHAM https://www.instagram.com/kevinbrittingham GO CHECK OUT AK DADDY BRANDON!! @Brandon Herrera https://www.youtube.com/c/BrandonHerrera https://www.instagram.com/realbrandonherrera ------------------------------ OUR MERCH: https://www.bunkerbranding.com/pages/unsubscribe-podcast JOIN THE PATREON NOW: https://www.patreon.com/UnsubscribePodcast WE HAVE A SUBREDDIT??? https://www.reddit.com/r/UNSUBSCRIBEpodcast/ CHECK OUT https://outofregz.com/ CODE: UNSUB http://gfuel.com/discount/baddie CODE: BADDIE ------------------------------ WHERE TO LISTEN Spotify https://spoti.fi/2Ye8YOU Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/3cbqY4k Amazon https://amzn.to/2YbzQia Google Play https://bit.ly/2YcWmaD Stitcher https://bit.ly/3cbnY8o MORE LINKS! https://linktr.ee/UnsubscribePodCast ------------------------------ Follow the Cast of Unsubscribe -Baddie- @Baddie Streams https://www.twitch.tv/baddie https://twitter.com/BaddieStreams https://www.instagram.com/baddiestreams/ https://www.youtube.com/baddiestreams -DonutOperator- @Donut Operator @Operation Donut https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwkm_Wcyh0pc7UUmZZfL-6w https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator/ https://www.twitch.tv/DonutOperator https://twitter.com/DonutOperator -Eli_Doubletap- @Eli Doubletap https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://www.twitch.tv/Eli_Doubletap https://twitter.com/Eli_Doubletap https://www.youtube.com/c/EliDoubletap ------------------------------ Edited by Fluck https://www.twitch.tv/fluck twitchcon 2022 reaction Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Oh my God. Okay, we'll put that right back. We got our drinks ready. Cody, don't you... I didn't pop it, I just sissed it. You sissed it. Matty has his own scent. I don't know him, but I feel like he looks like he doesn't smell good. We're keeping that in.

Say hi to Ethan. Makes sense now. Eli is racially ambiguous. That guy's fucking ridiculous. Don't know. That's harder to rhyme, but he's a really nice guy. Welcome to Unsubscribe. Hey guys, thanks for watching the Unsubscribe podcast.

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When Cody does his intro. Wait, do we do? Now I forget. You guys don't have a phone. Hi, everyone. Welcome to the unsubscribe podcast here. I am joined today by Eli DoubleFap,vin from q and mr brandon gerberbers because he is mexican

yeah this is what happens cameras are on we're recording drugs with us before yeah they're on the table and you have a stroke for an hour it's basically oh it's tuesday kevin welcome welcome thank you so much all right who's our guest we have a fantastic mr kevin from q our very first African-American. Well, you're... I was born in Morocco. There you go. Were you really?

Yeah. No shit. Wait, what? Yeah, so you were legitimately an African-American. Do we give him the end pass? We do. Can we give that pass? I think we can now.

I think this side of the table has... Well, no, you have the say. I'm going to be flying around this room. He's going to give up. He's going to give us the unfastened. I don't know. This is the unsubscribed podcast where the points are made up and the rules don't matter. Kevin's immediately like just gets up and walks away.

He's just like, no, this is not what I was signing up for. Yeah, I have employees I'm responsible for, so let's just move along. Your HR person just shot up in his sleep like, oh, something's wrong. There's been a disturbance in the force. I know, the phone's going nuts over on the bar. She's texting me right now. It's like millions of inwards suddenly cried out.

I don't know, I'm just nervous. Like thousands of blue hairs on Twitter cried out in terror. This is all too great. Kevin made the honey badger. Isn't that fucking cool? Also invented 300 blackout. Oh, you invented 300 blackout. A little bit of a big deal.

But seriously, making an animal. How did you do that? That's crazy. Well, so one night it was late. I was desperate. Jesus and I were talking. I was like, we had this little thing that was really cute that fuck lions up that'd be awesome man i'm just i tip my hat to you sir

you're welcome we're like why did you want to make the 300 blackout though oh man yeah okay first you made like eight points you You made so many different things. Also, you know, what's it called in Call of Duty? Your firearm? Oh, now it's called the Chimera, but it was the Honey Badger originally when I put it in there. This is what we're going to go over today. We're learning about guns in video games and then how they translate into the real names for them. Spoiler alert.

Did they license that? No. Here's how it happened so in 2000 what he doesn't know like how the names work on this stuff so this will be a really good like discussion for nerd shit oh okay so in like 2009 10 i was uh hired by infinity ward who makes call of duty modern warfare which i want to preface this with i'm sorry i've never played a video game past like super mario brothers or mario kart so i've never played call of duty modern warfare which i want to preface this with i'm sorry i've never played a video game past like super mario brothers or mario kart so i've never played call of duty but they were in a fight with sort of like ghost recon where ghost recon my understanding at the

time was they were technically more correct and um for like what do you call them like first person shooter games yeah hey you got it okay so they were technically correct and call of duty was more fun to play so they were trying to get more technically correct and ghost recon was trying to get more fun they both fucked up okay so but so so they hired me to do technical consulting and that's how i got the honey badger in there so the honey badger happened 300 blackout happened because still team six who i made all the silencers for at the time came to me and they were working with a 300 whisper cartridge and they wanted uh it wasn't working well and they wanted us to fix it and so we did it and we named it 300 blackout and so we did it for them and then

the honey badger was for another special operations group because for still team six we just did uppers for their guns they're hk4 16s and uh the the other real cool group wasn't into that they're like hey we've already got our thing squared away and i was like well what if i did this in a gun that could replace the mp5 sd because that life cycle has been up for 25 years like oh that's cool and so then i had to make the honey badger which is why i did it and so i wasn't really going to sell it commercially but you know the so back to call of duty um that's sort of what that game's about i think judging by yeah like top tier unit guys doing cool shit and so i put the honey badger in there during this program.

And so then it just became like, you know, it's the best marketing I ever accidentally did. Oh, yeah. Sort of how all those things happened from a line chef, cook at McDonald's to creating the greatest weapon platform. It's amazing how far you've came in life.

I know I have a helicopter, a plane, a big mansion, a bunch of business. I would say he's coming to this party. He's like cute. helicopter a plane a big mansion a bunch of bits here with you dorks you can't get a girl get a cute boy Brandon don't wait till I take a drink okay first shit like that okay first off what is the whisper cartridge well so it was a wildcat cartridge which was basically a 556 case with a 308 bullet in it the problem is the 308 shape of the bullet which is called an ogive won't feed reliably in an ar-15

so we had to make that shape correct so it would take up the full length of the magazine and be the right shape to feed correctly in the magazine and into the barrel extension of the chamber. Which had some hilarious repercussions as far as people mixing up ammo types. Yeah, yeah. So there's been some things.

I didn't realize that when I got my honey badger at first because I've never had a 300 blackout gun. I didn't know you just use AR mags and put 300 blackout in it. But do not shoot 5.56 or 2.23 through a Honey Badger. No. Well, I mean, that you theoretically can as long as you don't have a suppressor on it. It's not good for the gun. Yeah.

When you do the opposite, that's a little bit of a fun issue. That's what I think I meant to say. Do not put 300 blackout through your AR. So you only need 300 blackout magazines if you're using 308 winchester bullets which are incorrect if you're using 300 blackout bullets use regular m4 magazines and 300 blackout bullets are long enough to where it's not dangerous if you feed it in a 223 it won't chamber because the bullet's too long will it really okay yeah because you know we're smart like that we're trying you know to for friendlies not to get killed by doing dumb shit.

Trying. Service members doing dumb shit? It's very rare. I hear. Kind of like the police officers. They rarely do dumb things. Rarely. Yeah.

But it's rarely seen on the news. Yeah. Female police officers never mess up, by the way. They're some of the best in the force. Sam Hyde just said that. Did he? He was like, don't get pulled over by a female police officer because you're going to be fucking dead or something like that.

You're going to fucking die. Jesus Christ. They just go so hard. They're going to kill you. He's not exactly fucking wrong either. I think his whole point is like, you are bigger than them. You are stronger than them. The only fucking last resort they have is a gun.

I don't know. I just hit on female police officers when they pull me over. Yeah. It's upset. Well, I did that too. And then I got shot. Really? I showed her my wiener.

She shot me. That's ridiculous. You deserve to be shot for that little thing. Bam. I want to ask. She's putting me out of my misery i'm sorry oh it's literally the thanos go to the light sorry little one perfectly balanced oh no wait how did you get your uh job opportunity with call of duty like wait did they just reach out to you? Yeah, I've had this whole series.

So my first career, I wanted to work in intelligence with the government, and I failed miserably at that. Probably because there's not a lot of intelligence in the government. No, I really wasn't good at my job. I know what you mean. But no. Oh, these new codes like stacks of paper what do you mean you lost the football

i have to shred things but i did i did all the so i had i had a pretty um by 97 i had a pretty good gun collection i did all the gun sounds for saying private Ryan and band of brothers, that movie. Wait, you did all the, okay. First off guys, just what is a good gun,

a good gun collection to a lot of people is like 20 firearms. What is a good gun collection to you? Ooh, I don't know. Like in my, in my peak and my prime, probably a couple thousand. I probably had 500 to a thousand machine guns when i did private ryan

you had sex with private ryan that's where he went no it's francis ryan oh okay i i like to think that i've got a pretty cool gun collection then like you sit down at the table i'm like and like you see my shop and everything you You're just like, oh, this is cool. Like, man, I remember when I started out. He just called your gun collection cute. I know. I know.

I'm pretending that that's not like a fucking dagger in my goddamn soul. Thank you for reminding me. There's always someone with better hair, a bigger dick, funnier, more money, bigger gun collection. Like when I wanted to have the biggest gun collection in the world and i met reed knight and i went to his museum and i was like oh let me just sit the fuck back down how many square feet is that one again a million square feet yeah he has 19 000 machine guns on display nine million 19 000 machine guns on display his square footage is a million square million okay Which you'll see Friday. That'd be the perfect podcast,

but you empty the warehouse and you just go at the front and the backdrop is the million backdrop. So it's nothing, just a bad ass go for a podcast. You're like, hi, hi, hi. It's just like a SpaceX hangar. Exactly. I mean, basically, it's the old Tomahawk Missile Factory is Knight's armament.

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Please play responsibly. What's big? What if they put us on a platform and a forklift lifted us up and we do the podcast while driving around the facility? Everyone can see all the guns. I think we should do it. That's great until we get drunk and tip it over. We'll die. us up and we do the podcast while driving around the facility oh everyone can see all the i think we should do it drunk and tip it over die if they make a four-seater mclaren i think we should do that i'll drive you guys are podcasting and i'll drive us around the tank museum drifting oh yeah

yeah what were you driving around the tank museum there a mclaren it's an indoor tank museum and sometimes you drive golf carts but if you're a baller, drive McLaren around This is why I love talking to you Because it humbles us This is how we sound to normal fucking people And then we hang out with Kevin And Kevin's like, guys, you want to come over? Friday there's this big fun going

You can drive McLarens around a tank And we're like, what about golf carts? We think we're fucking hot shit And he's just like, hey guys, you see my massive dick? Come on, don't sell it, sure. What's up, pores? That's what he calls us.

He sat down and called us pores. He didn't even know our names. He thought it was a server that cut our yard. I don't know. My house in Africa, it's kind of like this, but I have people cut the grass with scissors. I don't know if you're joking or not. Why are you doing that?

Because it's funny. It's very ironic. It shows how I ball. Can you discuss how many acres your humble abode is? Well, it doesn't belong to me. Well, my house belongs to me, but it's on a friend's property, and it's 480,000 acres. So it's in the eastern cape of South Africa in the mountains.

480,000 acres. Well, if it were an American state, it would be this small. It's half the size of Rhode Island. Yeah. So I can drive around for a month and never go on the same road. Guys, we're leaving. We love to unsubscribe so much. Patreon.

But you know what, Zimbabwe now. Do we? You know, when I was an up-and-comer like you guys, when I was young, son of a bitch! I had these dreams, but then you realize it's like well women will steal all that shit from you and the government and and so now it's just like I buy freedom unfathomably based in Africa I'm very free and so there's a bunch of land and I drive around and I test stuff

and I shoot stuff and have sundowners and sometimes i pass out in the truck and i come down the mountain in the morning we can we when can we visit anytime you want to go every other month so i go in 10 days from now you guys are welcome then and in 10 days bro it's christmas no that's a good christmas well i mean okay you guys be slave to the cause but i'm good daddy's a pirate i do what i want yeah i yeah no i'm single with nothing going on so uh i'm i'm down i have no obligations we can fucking just go i'll pull my son out of school and we'll go to africa we'll make your content for you come and do it i have three guest cottages you guys have places to stay how big are the guest cottages about the size of this house i was like this motherfucker said cottage

he's like well this is more like a cardboard box this is where the servants for the guest cottage stay seriously I think probably a little bigger than the downstairs of this each guest cottage you have a living room a fireplace

a bedroom kind of like a dressing room with a bathtub then you have a shower and bathroom yeah a lot more than i had grown so they're nice like i wouldn't put you guys you know in a dump so there's three and then we have other places yeah so you guys can come god that would be amazing i did it won't cost you anything like pay for your flight everything else is free you stay with me we can shoot stuff it's beautiful oh no kevin stop no we said no he's gonna no stop you're gonna make me africa we come back we just like we come back black

He's already watching this episode like you mother Get him over. He's moving, Batty! He's moving out of his furnace. I saw somebody reply to that on Twitter. I saw you reply to somebody because he said he was moving.

The guy's like, oh, well, good. Maybe you'll have some place where you're not sweating out fucking Eli, Cody, and Brandon. He literally's like, oh, well, good. Maybe you'll have some place where you're not sweating out fucking Eli, Cody, and Brandon. He literally replies like, go fuck yourself. His last, or the house we used to have the podcast in, it was in Batty's spare room, and it was fucking hot as shit. It was during the summertime. Oh, I don't like that.

It's 110 degrees in San Antonio. And then, like, I guess the homeowners had it, like it like poorly insulated and the AC wasn't that great we were always sweating we were just sweating balls in this podcast we had Goldberg on and we're all just sitting there sweating like fuck I mean they oiled themselves up already

showing those muscles off fuck him up I can call Goldberg right now we can get that best podcast ever kevin's talking shit just giving it suplexed by fucking goldberg the goddamn episode well bullshit that shit's fake i think it was still watching the wire and saying like i don't think this really happened well bron stroman adam chair is is a good

friend and a hunting buddy of mine and he makes goldberg look small he's like six nine three thirty with a six pack at one point and so i fuck with him all the time and you know he was like a world strongman competitor so i'm supposedly i was going to wisconsin to hunt with him and his world strongman competitor best friends this weekend but we're going to the knights armament thing and so it's like me and the three of them that all bench press like 550 to 650 pounds and i just jump on them every fucking chance i have you're that friend oh i am and he'll just like pick me up and set me down. Like, stop. You are cute, Kesson. Boy.

Boy. Adam was supposed to, I think it was the first year Gundy's, they were doing like some skit or whatever they were planning out. He was supposed to shove me through a table. Oh, he could. Oh, he absolutely could. We both like showed up, like because we had both heard the plan, I guess separately.

We show up, we get there, we see the table, and he's like, I don't feel comfortable doing that. I'm like'm like good because i don't feel comfortable with it either it's just this table we will push you through he's like i thought you meant like it was like a breakaway table like it's just a fucking folding table and he's just like you're gonna man i'm gonna break this child like yeah yeah he's a sweet guy but i mean i've fucked with him better like from here to that sofa he's thrown me in the air before. He's like, stop fucking with me, dude. And I'm like, pussy.

You just poked the bear? I just picture you rotating. Alcohol's a hell of a drug. The first time I met Bill Goldberg, Robert O. Burst was with him. And I knew Goldberg was big. And then Robert O. Burst standing next to and like I knew Goldberg was big and then Robert O. Burst standing next to him god damn his head is like a pumpkin

yeah he's got a huge pumpkin head and he's fucking 6'9 or something like that 400 pounds like ridiculous dude yeah those guys are crazy isn't there about to be like a strongman fight between like the mountain they already did it didn't they it was the mountain and Eddie Hall.

Eddie, yeah. Yeah, I think so. Mountain wins. Mountain's been training for a while. Yeah, he fucking lost a bunch of weight. I don't know. He's a big dude. Did they already do that fight?

You know who the mountain is. Yeah, he scared the shit out of me on Game of Thrones. He crushed that dude's little head. You killed the Mandalorian. Oh, yeah. That's the timeline Fuck man he's been in Pedro Pascal He's done a bunch of shit And now he's in what's it called Dude he has all the nerd franchises

Cause Game of Thrones Mandalorian and now he's going into The Last of Us Oh is he He's Joel for The Last of Us Oh yeah he's the main dude Oh you've never heard of him The Last of Us. Oh, is he? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's Joel for The Last of Us. What's The Last of Us? Oh, yeah. He's the main video game.

Oh, you've never heard of it? It's like a survival zombie kind of video game. Thor beat Eddie Hall. Oh, okay. Yeah. By unanimous decision. Oh, yeah. Okay, Eddie Hall.

I know him. He's bleeding out of his nose. The really thick, shorter guy. Yeah. Yeah, he's one strong man a bunch of times. Yes, he is. Have you ever seen Thor's before and after pictures? Because he used to play basketball in, I think it was college or high school or something.

He was this big around, but he was just tall. Have you seen his family when he's the shortest kid? When you look at him, he doesn't look like Eddie Hall. Eddie Hall is like a fire hydrant. Yeah. The mountain looks like he's tall. A fucking mountain. He's a goddamn mountain. Yeah, he looks know gravedigger who also played college basketball and then they just put

on some muscle like athletic gregor clay not gregor cligg again yeah god i cannot when you look at born's name i don't even try to pronounce it all that scandinavian bullshit yeah it has a lot of question or whatever those are called. That's Thor when he was a teenager playing basketball. He still looks like he'd fuck you up. I mean, he's thin, but yeah. Yeah. That's his dad and his grandpa.

It's before he started eating fucking 6,000 calories a day. Because he's like 6,000. His dad and grandpa are just,. Yeah, they're just monsters. Imagine having to buy every house custom because you need a fucking 12-foot ceiling. You know who I became friends with like 20 years ago? Is that? Dikembe Mutombo.

Hey, 6'9". Thor's 6'9". In basketball? He's like 7'1". Is this an Africa thing? Well, he is Africanan but i wasn't trying to be like fucking racist about it he's just asking about the country we were on a flight together and we were flying from atlanta to la and that's how i met him but he actually lived only like two blocks from me in atlanta so we

became friends and would hang out and um he had a size you ran into ran into an African in Atlanta? Yeah. It's crazy. Next you're going to say you ran into a Mexican in San Antonio. Weird. He had to sit like on the aisle in first class. And his legs would go beyond like the bathroom doors. And he was a size 24. His shoe was like this big. And I took pictures on that flight of his shoe and my flip flop.

And, you know, now we're like a size 11. No. I fucking slapped him and took it. I was like, shut your face, know your role. But he's fucking hilarious. Now who's the racist one? Know your role, boy. Kevin Brittingham, 2022. And if he heard this, he would die laughing. this is where a red laser shows up on my chest from your fucking pr guy like he's so cool like

his parents were both college professors in africa and he speaks seven languages that's why he was the international spokesperson for like adidas and the the nba and he's recruited tons of like african athletes to the nba it's fucking hilarious it's awesome and oh my god he would tell me stories he's like kevin you know how i met my wife i was like no dikembe i do do not know how you met he's like i went to speak to the embassy and there was this beautiful african woman in the back and at the end of my speech he's like all I could do was look at her the whole time. I was like, you, you are my wife now. He's like, we've been married for 20 years.

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I was like, God, that's awesome. I was like, what do you think about that now? He's like, I'm not sure it was the right thing. I might have jumped gun. He's fucking hilarious. He was so cool. I loved him. Anyway,

I moved, he moved. We were not as close as we used to be, but he's a cool guy. Oh, that's a fucking man. The life you've lived. You know,

private Ryan, we won two academy awards for sound i know oh trust me i know that's why i'm like more like the fuck you're gonna be nerding out about sound design like the entire purpose of saving private ryan was to give world war two vets ptsd they did a good job it's so fucking i went to the premiere and there's a whole bunch of people that left in the beginning and uh the beach scene i mean it's fucking intense yeah i mean i was like god damn that's like thank god i'm born now that's not an easy movie to watch either no no the part the part that gets me is where the german like kills a dude with the knife or the bayonet when they're in the house and the guys are sitting there watching shitbag or when their buddy gets lit up with the mg42 and they're in the house and the guy's just sitting there watching. Shitbag. Or when their buddy gets lit up with the MG42

and they're just trying to put pressure on it and he's just like, mama, mama. Like, ah, that's fucking. That sucks, but the knife scene is intense and he walks by the guy and just looks at him. Yeah. Yeah, that movie was tough. Band of Brothers, I think,

is probably the greatest movie series ever made. I love it. Private Ryan was incredible, but that fucking thing's hard to watch yeah did they did they slowed they shot that I want to say 20 frames a second or 18 or 20 shot it at 20. yeah 18 to 20. that's why it's a more choppy if you go back and watch it it's a more uh so the shutter rate is set for that to give that visceral feel are they like that's one skipping or like what's yeah that's the Blair Witch Project that's all and it makes it more intimate it also adds more

action when you're doing that if you're showing a whole punch in 60 frames it's like oh you get to see all this but in less frames it's gonna hear hear back that snap so it looks more violent it looks a lot more violent well you've cut frames when you're doing a fight scene exactly and then the sound design going into that movie, it's like, I mean, I'd go back and watch that shit.

I'd fucking nerd out about that. It's one of those movies where Steven Spielberg and the set design, were you there for it? No, I just did the sounds. We did it actually at my ranch. Don't you,

just the sound. Do not say just the sounds. You won awards off the head of me. Here's your $20. Put some respect on your own hands. Here's $20. Be proud of that. But they spent like 18 months collecting all the sound.

I mean, it's amazing. Like the trouble that they went to. Like they would go, they would fly to like Sweden to do audio recordings of a boat on a dock that was the correct but like all this stuff for 18 months like it's the first time they've ever done that and when i heard that i didn't really realize at the time so it was skywalker sounds it was lucas and spielberg and what when they were educating me because our process was pretty intense and they're telling me everything they had done in the year and a half leading up to it because the gun sounds were the last thing that they did for the movie and when

they were telling me everything they did and i was like huh because i don't actually particularly like war movies uh like for me for our industry i'm not you know it wasn't in the military and i'm not i i don't love war movies it's just i'm i just I like guns and I like the technology. I like my niche in our industry, but I'm not crazy about our industry or I'm not nuts about any of that stuff. But I went back and watched some of the older movies. I've never seen, I don't know, name any of the. Black Hawk Down.

Yeah, I did the sounds for that too. I've seen that. Jesus fucking Christ. Don't sound disappointed and bored at the Hawk Down. Well, yeah, I did the sounds for that too. I've seen that. Jesus fucking Christ. Don't sound disappointed and bored at the same time. Yeah, motherfucker. I'll do that one. And Pearl Harbor, but I'm not proud of that one. That one sucks.

But the sounds are good. But like the movies before, like the older... Like my son's all into World War II and Vietnam movies. Like I'm not particularly into them. I don't watch them. But I went back and watched some of them to listen to the sounds, and I was like, oh, god damn, those are horrible. Especially the older ones.

They really do. Well, Private Ryan was the first one where it's legit, and it really is. When I watched it and I watched all these older ones, I was like, oh, yeah, this is really great. It was super intense as a result of the sounds. I was clipping for one of the sounds i was clipping in a uh for one of like the reels on instagram like uh just me shooting my m60 i was gonna cut back to the original rambo first blood and i ended up going first blood part two that's probably somebody

going oh dude first blood the the sound of the m60 was literally embarrassing they don't have the depth to a lot of this like it's go back and watch it like it is so fucking bad like it it sounds like you clip arted a fucking sound effect into that that film it's probably what happened could we throw that up here right now weird i forget you have an editor that's super easy Super easy. You guys use one of those services or it's just like your guy? We have a guy. Yeah, we have a guy.

He's fucking amazing. Fuck, you're amazing. Oh, also, everyone, give Fluck in the comments, tell him congrats for his new baby because it's a month. Congrats on your cum trophy. Your cum trophy.

Say cum trophy in the comments below. It's a month a month congrats on your trophy God damn a new job these guys are going nowhere Mother fucking god damn it. Look at what our boss is saying. He's all proud. Reading the comments on the big screen. He's scrolling through. He's like, yeah, that was my comment. Follow him on Twitch. Before we even start this ad read, this is the ghost bed pillows.

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It's got a zipper. What? Dude, use the outside. It's legitimately like cooling as fuck. Really? Bro, I'm telling you, just, just rock that shit. Raw dog your pillow, bro. So nice.

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These prices are... scary. Boo. That was awful. With sound design, though, it's crazy when you see um a lot of people don't realize they think it's all filmed there and then it's like they're just filming with a mic and it's like you're just walking and they hear the gun shooting you're like the same thing no no no it's like sound on sound on sound like you're building fucking like a hundred layers of audio because we did every it

was pretty intense so it's a couple weeks um just and i don't know how many guns probably like 50 guns if i had to guess but a couple weeks you know like 12 to 16 hour days to you're recording at the muzzle you're recording at the breach you're recording the shells hitting the ground then we'd put down plywood then we'd do it on concrete then we do it on water and then the bullet hits bullet impact so everything we would shoot meat i would kill animals we would shoot those we'd shoot mud dirt rock like everything and still everything possible but it shows that's the thing like you watch that movie and it fucking shows because like even like as you know serial

gun addicts or whatever, you watch that movie and you listen to it and you watch it, especially that opening scene, you have no fucking complaints. It's still completely immersive. As somebody who knows basically all those fucking guns, you still watch it. You're like, holy fuck.

This could be filmed on Normandy. It's good. It's scary as fuck. Have you guys ever seen the conicorn videos oh dude the warnicon was the lmg video trey and i have you haven't oh my god oh my god what the fuck you need to do some goddamn homework all right i'm gonna fix it and i'm gonna show you my brother in christ this is literally like i got you this is like two girls one cup oh go no no but trey and i are in the LMG video.

It's helicopter pilots. One of the first things I asked you when we first started hanging out here. I'm like, dude, I've got to know. Was that you in the Carnico video? Yeah. Those videos, my man set the stage for that shit. He was so smart. It's not too late for you to leave.

Speaking of sons. I heard about you my son who was a total asshole and i hated him so i sent him to boarding school no not true my son had many executive functioning issues and uh so trying to get him remediation where he didn't have to live with me forever and could have his own independent life sent him to boarding school in vermont and um do you sound autistic too a little bit and so mine really is oh really yeah mine's not super but he's super autistic mine's like lame autistic stolen valor he's stolen valor

he's stolen valor he walks around with a puzzle piece on his chest does your son cast spells but he's he has one podcast I thought we could go one podcast

without autism jokes Jesus fucking Christ alright he has one podcast i thought we could go one podcast without autism jokes jesus fucking christ all right but he he has um he's dyslexic as dysgraphia and dyscalculia and he's yeah he's on the spectrum but so i went through 10 years of remediation which cost a fortune i know trust me okay so he went to boarding school for a few years and it was this international boarding school in vermont and that's where i realized how brilliant the uh putting the honey badger in call of duty was because there was a chinese kid that came there who was dyslexic he came with a translator because he didn't speak english and he knew what the honey badger was the The bunny hadger? Yeah.

Hadger. They don't have the R's. You got the bunny hadger? Oh, my God. You're funny. Kevin. Kevin, me so cute? Oh, my God. He make the honey badger.

It's sitting close to home. I am Asian. Can't make accent. And I'm just over here like, wanting to. The kid in class. Don't be racist on air. Oh my God. Honey, why'd y'all?

Fuck, I don't even know where I was. The Asian kid liked the honey. I don't even know where I was. The Asian kid liked the honey. I don't know what that means. Oh, so my son. So my son. So I think it was actually a Norwegian kid that he was roommates with who followed you, and my son started watching with him. It's like an international fucking boarding school.

It is. Seriously international. Every country. Name a country. There was probably a kid there. is. Seriously, international. Every country. Name a country. There's probably a kid there. Anyway. Africa. Yeah.

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His roommate one year was a kid from Zimbabwe who was white. But yeah, every fucking country. We call him Zimbabwe now. Rhodesia. Do we? Yeah, thank you. But he's a white kid from Zimbabwe? You had a Rhodesian there?

Yeah. Well, he was more Zimbabwe and they were pretty hippie. His parents went there after, you know, revolution. The cool stuff. So, anyhow. Any uh anyway fucking posers you don't deserve those fucking shorts no but it's why i'm kind of partial to it especially being in south africa now there's like a bunch of expats there that were in the police and military and their pH is now and they're friends of mine anyway.

So all there. So people think in South Africa that happened, but it, it didn't in Rhodesia. Like you were white, you lost your farm and your land and you know, you got shot or you left period. And their country is doing so much better now because yeah,

totally. There are no jobs, even in the mines and uh, they're all poor as hell and they have to sneak into south africa for work so it worked out great for them no i i'm glad to see them reap the fruits of their success so anyhow so my son started watching your videos and he comes home so i would go every wednesday and then every friday afternoon or saturday morning to see him it's two and a half

hours away and i would either i brought him home every other weekend and every other weekend i would stay there and for the day and i'd take the kids do shit his homies and uh so that's when he started watching your videos and so that's what i was saying my son we go to the white house for christmas he's like you know we have like don jr just did my podcast he's at the house oh no shit my son didn't even come home to see him and they're friends and so like my buddy adam who is bron strowman wwe who's always like from the time my son's six years old is like we go to the events when they're in town we sent ringside he picks my son up after the match all the things my son's like like any celebrity that i know nothing fucking donut operator my son is like the coolest motherfucker ever to live dad let me watch these videos and so we come

home the weekends we watch these videos i was like god damn that's pretty funny that's pretty good so when you sent us when i I came here a while back. What you're telling me is that your son is autistic and racist. Yeah, basically. Yeah, he hates white people. He will. I was here last time and you sent shirts and hats. It was like I introduced myself.

I don't know who to the biggest celebrity in the entire world. My son was so excited. And it was like so dumb to me. I was like, he hasn't. No, but thank you so much. You sent him all these shirts and hats. He was so excited. I took one hat and one shirt.

And my son looked at me like this. He was so pissed. I was like, motherfucker. He sent like six. I took one. Oh, so anyway, thank you very much so my son and I so I started doing this art where I cut these stencils out because you know I'm kind of a lonely guy and I'm at home at night and you know I'm very artistic and autistic and come fucking hang out

well I should so I cut these stencils out and then then I do the canvas, and then I go out to the range, and I shoot these spray cans, and I start doing this stuff, and it sprays paint. And so anyway, you told me your favorite gun was the MP7. Well, I have one because I'm a baller, and that's what we do. And so my son and I, I told him that, and I was like. That was the Kanye, like, yo, my life's dope, and I do dope shit. My life is dope, and I do dope shit. And so my son is like, okay, let's get the MP7.

We'll go do it. So this is ammo that SEAL Team 6 gave me for the MP7. We did silencers for their MP7s. And so my son and I went and did this art for you. He was so excited. Wait, this is the ammo from? SEAL Team 6. This is the 40-grain.

Brandon's really watching that. I'm just watching Brandon's really watching that I just watched Brandon's eyes just track Brandon's address is on this box you sent it to my house and I'm like just watching Cody kind of fumble with this cardboard box I'm just watching your eyes

so guys if you can send your panties to Brandon's address which you saw on the screen right now that'd be awesome go ahead and fucking put that up. My son and I did this art where we set up the paint cans, spray cans because he's a graffiti artist or a hoodlum or criminal

and he does a lot of graffiti. You need a knife. And so I got the MP7 out with our silencer which was the one we developed for still team six and for them to kill people. I'm mainly terrorist and mainly, I'm kidding.

So we took a black canvas and my son picked the paint colors and, uh, I did a stencil of the MP7 and and we shot the cans and this is like my favorite fucking 80s outrun colors yeah fucking red yeah so it's a black canvas and we shot uh all those different colors and we kind of moved the stents a little bit every time between to create the trap and i'll go through one portion of it because that's even yeah that's a bullet hole probably we got a whole bullet because we're because we're dope and we do dope shit yeah dude that's awesome yeah donut thank you for swag you sent us uh thank you for the swag you sent you and me and my boy we made you some art of your favorite gun using your favorite

gun oh they made mp7 art with an mp7 your dog, I heard you like MP7s. That's my favorite thing ever, dude. Yeah, so that's got the original. Everything's original, and the silencer and flash hider that we made for them for the Bin Laden raid, actually. And then it actually has a bullet hole from when we were doing some of the colors. Did they use MP7s in the Bin Laden raid? Yeah, they were some.

No shit, I didn't know that. Yeah, so we did. And you got Cody that and me the actual MP7. Yeah, I gave you the mp7 but no but i hope you like it but we did it with the mp7 my son shot it that's so fucking cool and i cut the stencil out the night before just with a poster board and a razor blade from my MP7 and that's it. So hopefully you like it.

My son was super stoked on it. So that's cool. You now have the flu. Thanks for giving me the gay. Now you're sick. Jesus. I just fucking fell. Not prepared for that.

We would hang out so much if you moved here. I like based Kevin. Well, you know, Daddy's a pirate and a rolling stone, so I do whatever I want. You know, when you have a personal attorney, you just get out of trouble.

The lawless don't want you You know, when you have a personal attorney, you just get out of trouble. It's your free, it's your $20. The globalist don't want you to know this, but as long as you have a good attorney, you can do whatever you want. Which he did not have, apparently. Sometimes, no. So apparently when we go to Africa, we can have a fanny pack full of $20 bills and do anything we want to do. Absolutely. Yeah, because we made that $20 joke earlier. I don't think we've

explained that to the audience. I'll even supply the $20 bills, because, like, I don't know,'ve explained that to the audience. I'll even supply the $20 bills because, I don't know, it'd probably be like $1,000 amongst us. At least. Oh, yeah, real quick. That's 50 fuck-ups. So, we're having

a fantastic lunch and Kevin's like, the corruption in South Africa is so low. It's a great start. A great start. Corruption at an all time low for $20. I misspoke.

Well, I just thought you were talking about like actual corruption. And then I realized you were talking about the barrier to entry on corruption. That's so fucking low. Like, yeah, you fucking shoot a guy. Maybe it's a hundred bucks. And we're like, wait, hold up.

He's like, yeah, $20. You get out of most everything. It's like, okay, wait, hold up. Barrier corruption is high. It's just the cost. In the United States, they're they're like well rich people run everything but you don't understand in the third world like being rich is literally a fucking superpower yeah i mean i i think the oh this is the perfect transition so kevin this is the bit i wasn't

telling you about during breakfast so we have the offenders we are all superheroes you have to pick a superpower and then we choose the offset now you're like that sounds like fucking dope why are they called the offenders cody what's your superpower you can fly but i have to scream racial slurs while i fly or i just fall out of the sky or if he's thinking racist thoughts he'll start to levitate like we have that joke like racist racist shit happens. He'll just start levitating out of his chair. So a fire. How do you feel about this one? I love it because he can't go to my neighborhood to save people.

It's like a Section 8 housing community is burning. I can't go save them. No, I'm walking up with a ladder. I got this, guys. Just close up. Brandon, what's yours? So I fucking perpetually myself however that's i can never die how do we say this without getting demonetized i give myself the big sleep

i can't actually permanently die so i wake up up not remembering how or why. So he has his extra corpse. Oh yeah, your body stays there. Oh, I forgot about that. So his corpse will stay wherever he slept. What's yours? Well, we read, what was my new one?

What's the new one? I remember, it was the crime cuck. His original one is Fuck oh, I remember it was the the crime cock Flash super speed for his original one, but he shits anytime he wants to run fast. There's uncontrollable diarrhea What was the crown crime? I am still the speed of light where I'm like and I show up to a crime I have a five minute cooldown period where I can't interact with anything. So I just watch the crime happen for five minutes.

I'm like, I'm sorry, ma'am. I can't stop him. So I'm just like invisible. Some brutal graping is going on here. Just like, oh, man. Just distracting him. Can't call the cops. My phone just keeps falling through my hands

so these are all like terrible dreams we've all had yes someone's attacking us i have my gun i'm like oh it's a 88 pound trigger pull i have the thing in my dreams where like my guns don't like they'll fire one round and then not cycle. Yeah. Like I, that that's, I think we all have those. I don't know why. It's all some version of that. What's your superpower though?

Other than being Batman right now. Well, right now your superpowers, I'm rich. Are you actually Batman? Wait, we've no one's picked that superpower yet. Yeah.

We can choose the offset. I think it has to be that I've got a giant deck. Well, we know, Kevin. You keep showing us. It requires a lot of fuel. I don't know. It requires a lot of fuel. That's actually a perfect offset.

I've got a giant dick, but not enough blood in my body to fill it. He's like, I'm right. My man. I'm perpetually flaccid. Like he just falls on his face. Yeah. Nah.

That's what I love. It's like, honey, I'm ready for Dick's heart. He doesn't remember sex. Anytime. He's like, no,

I can't. That's our problem. Me bags his offset. He's like, not again. You're looking at the me bags and shit before you're like, all right, I'm ready. I like how you don't save anyone.

You just have a huge dick. You're part of our crew of superheroes. I mean, I'm trying to save, you know, dissatisfied women. Yeah.

Cody's flying around. Brandon's off in his own. Somebody's got to take care of those ladies. Shouts a racial slur off self. People are saying, oh! Why are they here? They haven't said anything. What just happened? This is just in bad news. And Eli can't fucking stop any of it. No, no! Try to hit the stop record buttons on camera. God damn it. God damn it.

Just absolute chaos. Like fucking Deadpool 2 when they drop it. You get that split second Brad Pitt cameo. Oh my God. I want to do an offender seat. Because I could VFX compass technically since i have the right if we're all facing one way i can just do the um the the uh during that final fight of uh not the offenders what is it called the avengers the final fight sequence because i can in the original way

original movie yeah or because i could do avengers and then just compass into the blues where it's just like nothing's happening it's just exactly as described. It's just like a purse snatching going on All doing cool guy landings Just tripod he flies off into space. It's just tripod landing. It's like, whoo! Yeah, you just land like your arms are crossed. Two feet back, one forward, and then you pass out

and it's silly. It's like the superhero landing, but it's just like your cock. No, it's even better because his dick has to be hard for that landing. So he's like, his body's limp.

So it's just the upper though. It's like, it's that half second comedic beat. Just... Hi there, I'm Ryan Reynolds and I have a list of things I like to have on set. It's just little things like two freshly cracked eggs, scrambled with crispy hash brown, sausage crumble,

and creamy chipotle sauce from Tim Hortons. From my rider to Tim's menu, try my new scrambled eggs loaded breakfast box. Why is he here again? Oh, he's really cool. He likes his jokes. I don't know. He really likes having sex with girls. I like girls.

They're cool. Welcome to the offenders. Now you are part of the crew. I love it. I like you. What about we just adopt? Yeah, we're just like, you know what? He's pretty cool.

He's like literally Deadpool. What's his name the tad like big dick man doesn't really work What was the dead pulls Ted the average guy oh? Yeah, just like the totally normal like yeah, like what I just want to know most yeah, it's like we're hiring. He's really cool. Yeah, Dennis Hi, baddie. Do you like sex stuff? I do too with the opposite sex sometimes With all the bad news about these prices these days It's nice to know that Adam and Eve is still offering the best deal what kind of deal eli you're talking about adam and eve.com get 50 off plus free shipping that's 50 off an adventurous new toy how adventurous the dildo massive you see that mushroom behind you turn around flood punch in that could be a toy that could insert inside you and it could be 50 off i like 50 off be adventurous maybe some slippery lube or almost

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Man, that would be weird. It's just a giant box painted black. I got a waste of time. What if we had like a clear box? I want people to see the fucked up shit I'm buying. Because what better way to meet your neighbors than like yeah Like a display case I Would love a display case of chips. Can we could we build a display case of dildos over there?

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Us. I don't know why. Yeah. Us. Right, Fluck? I want to ask some questions. Okay. All right.

So I'm going to test you guys. Eli, what's your favorite gun my favorite oh man these are actually why why i'm not used to this why is this the awkward moment for me my guest don't ask what because i'm gonna call you That's his nickname, Big Dick Daddy. We hate him. He's just got BDD on the fucking thing. I'm going to call you out for having bad taste in guns. I'm going to be the punk ass bitch. You son of a bitch. Okay, well, the honey badger.

Oh, I've got it. I've got his name. I've got his name. We were saying he's Batman, right? Yeah. Badman. Big ass dick. Yeah.

Oh, man. What's your favorite gun? No, I'll get mine. You already said yours. He was joking, obviously. I don't give a shit about that gun. God damn it. Fuck you guys.

Fucking hate podcast. I hate you guys. God damn it. Fuck you guys. Fucking hate podcast. I hate you guys. YouTube is stupid. I'm going home to my 400 thousand acre ranch. Fuck you all. He's like, goodbye, Ports. He just walks off with her bottle of Makers. With his jetpack. Where did he have that?

Weird. When you're best friends with Elon, you'll have one oh if i could god damn it i would right now all right so so what is it really not the honey bed well now you're like i know well it depends are we doing long range anything you just have to name one i'm no don't lead a horse to water. Why? Well, you tell me what you want. If the horse is dehydrated, my brother in Christ, you probably should. Yeah.

Lead your horse to fish. My horse is a lifetime. Then he'll drink when he's thirsty. I could. That's going to be our new shirt. It's a horse fishing the pond. It was good. He just snotted right over himself.

I am not- I am not- I was not fucking prepared for that. You teach a horse to fish. You teach a horse to fish and Brandon will snot all over himself. The horse has to be sitting like a person. I know.

It's like one of those bojack horsemen. Holy fuck. Did you do that on purpose? Okay, I was like, that was going to go right there. I'm sorry that went down.

Oh man, fucking favorite gun. Can I do a pistol and a rifle oh if you're a punk ass bitch if i'm a punk i'll fucking well yeah okay pistol and rifle i really love my dvc open what the fuck is that the sti it'll staccato now dvc open okay it's a race gun it's there so a 20 whatever they call yeah 2011 it's they're just they're super yeah. So a 20, whatever they call them. Yeah, 2011. It's just their super. Yeah, I like those. They're cool.

They're cool. And then my. Really liking my SRS Covert. What's that? The Desert Tech SRS Covert. Oh, my God. Eli's stock just dropped, plummeted. Oh, my God. It's stock just dropped, plummeted. Oh, my God.

It's like Elon smoking weed on a drill. It's my bolt right now. Let's hear it. Do we have some beef with Desert Tech? I just have a beef with bad science and design. My bedside gun is... Oh. No, no, no. You're too late.

No, I stand by my decision. bullpups are so cool ergonomics trigger pull they're all great do you hate bullpups too i just hate heavy dumb shit like i don't like big fat bitches it's just who i am it's a bolt gun oh yeah okay so she's manually operated i gotta open it up all right so we're gonna move along I got to open it up. Got it. All right. So we're going to move along. Eli, you're cute. I don't know if you ever saw this tweet that I did.

No, I don't have the tweeter. I don't have my glasses either. That's my bedside gun. What's the suppressor on that? What's the suppressor on that? Why don't you have it on Instagram and tag me? I know, but what one is that? It's the Thunder Chicken.

Thunder Chicken. Ooh. My son named all those. Oh, you have a bed... Wait, is your bedside the... Do you have a bedside? Oh, we both have same bedsides. Okay, never mind.

That's literally my bedside. Oh, so you guys can't be together now. Yeah. Well, we could. It'd be really cute. That's the joke. I've never seen that. I just got Twitter.

We're just sleeping on it. Twitter's awesome right now. It is? Yeah, Twitter is really good. I don't know how to use it. I'm going to put some work on it. I got 9,000 likes. People just like Honey Badgers on the bedside.

That's it. Twitter is a different game. Dude, that's awesome. Especially when you just say your words the entire time. I didn't know you had one. You like it? You ever shot anybody with it? I haven't shot anybody, but that's why it's on my bed.

I want to. If you're going to use it, Barnes 110. We tested that. What's that? The Barnes 110 bullet. Oh, okay. Gotcha, gotcha. I don't know what subs I have in it right now.

Supersonic, the Barnes 110. I mean, you could kill a fucking woolly mammoth. I'm just saying. Those aren't trying to rob my house. You don't know. Kevin don't know. Fucking wooly mammoth. I'm just saying those aren't trying to rob my house A wooly mammoth corpse brought it back to life and then shot it because he could Because that ball What does it sound like when a wooly mammoth flesh is impacted with a barns one thing you're like Joe

You're like John Hammond where it's Jurassic Park but you just get to shoot extinct animals. Bring it back to life. I promise you not only would that be more profitable and it wouldn't have gotten out of hand. This is what it sounds like. Cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching. That's what it sounds like.

I just picture, welcome to Jurassic Park. Burn! Just mowing them down in the mini bird. Dr. Crouch, my dear Dr. Crouch, welcome to Jurassic Park. There's 12 scientists in the fucking lab coast. Oh, Kevin, excellent job. Excellent, excellent. You have a T-Rex?

No, we had a T-Rex. All right, so the honey badger, obviously, great choice. Not good choice, great choice. What's a great choice? The Honey Badger, idiot. And you have a favorite handgun. Fluck, mute mic two. Only because it's in my favorite anime, the Jericho.

Is it 41 Magnum? No, no, it favorite anime, the Jericho. Is it 41 Magnum? No, it's the 9mm Jericho. The 41 Action Express. 941? I don't even know what we're talking about. God damn it, I don't remember. I don't bless. You get a pass,

goes the honey badger. Mr. AK-47, your favorite guns? Well, mine's pretty fucking easy. It rhymes with Pass goes the honey badger. Okay. Mr. AK 47. Your favorite guns. Yeah. Well, mine's pretty fucking easy. Uh, it rhymes with your morning.

It rhymes with schmor mom. My favorite thing to use schmor mom. Um, no, the, uh,

obviously the AK platform is a very special like spot in my heart. But if you had to like pull me outside of the AK platform as a whole, I'm really enjoying the SCAR-17. I really like that gun.

What about a handgun? Handgun? Well, my EDC is either a Glock 19 or a Glock 43X. That's what I carry is 43X. 43X. Dude, I love it. We can't talk about this on this podcast. You can talk about this.

43X? Because my eyes have can't talk about this On this podcast You can talk about this But we can't That's a 43X Yeah Because my eyes have gone And because I'm About to turn 49 I haven't gotten the Surgery yet So I have to use

The red dot But Talon Sy Who's a YouTuber He's a great friend of mine I love him very much He is so great Oh the van

Yeah That's why you got your van He inspired me to get One of those vans Yeah when he first got the van The first thing he did was drive up and stayed at my house for like three or four days before he went on like his country, all 50 state trip. Ooh, town. That's awesome.

And you know, he's, he's the best. I love him. He's such a sweetie. Fuck, like him. Yeah. And I was like, Talon, you can stay in the mansion that I live in. Cause you know, I ball. He's like, nah, man, I'll stay in the driveway in my van

I sleep best now it's like all right well if you need something you know you can stay in one of the 47 rooms in the house and uh no but he's cool so he made me want one too was that it they're so cool is that a joke or is there actually 47 rooms 47 rooms of an an 18 800 square feet i have a 5 000 square foot skate park oh dude have you seen his fucking skate park i haven't seen it he was telling me about it dude his fucking pictures of it it's it's a because his son is a skater and i okay my son is a wannabe okay okay he's a skater i've skated since I've had a half pipe Since I was 12 I skate Bert still today I get after it

Yeah So What do you not do? We will come live with you And make your contest 500 grand a year Per person Be poor

I mean If you make me money Y'all can have whatever you want 500 grand a year We just signed up We can make her own content Make me a million bucks You can have 500 grand a year. We just signed up. We can make her own content. Make me a million bucks, you can have 500 grand a year. Oh, we could do that.

Oh, that's super easy. I said per person. I said per. So we just need to make three million. I was talking about Matt's content. My son, when he was like six years old, he and I were blowing up cars and doing shit. We weren't even videoing. We were just doing it we're have big dicks and we're badasses we weren't videoing

anything we're doing it by ourselves i was like hey yo my man they brought a new van to the range you want to go shoot it he's like we got any terror i'm like who the fuck don't and he's like yeah dad let's do it and he get the mg42 out on the tripod. He's like, boom. I'm like, oh my God, that was cool. It's like, that was pretty cool. That's what I'm worried about if I ever have fucking kids. I'm worried about that. Like the overexposure to cool shit.

That's what, you know, that's what's happening with my son right now. I know. Yeah. Oh, they get desensitized to life. Desensitized to cool shit. I'm like, hey, Bill Goldberg is at the range with a minigun. Do you want to go? No, I'm just going to play some games.

What the fuck, man? In some ways, you and I are living the same life. My son, like, idolizes you. And it's like, hey, you know, they're writing a book about me. Like, you know, son, I have a castle. I forgot you literally own a castle. Wait, do you have a castle? Yeah, I have a castle.

And I was like, we have a castle. We have a plane in Africa. I want to see your castle now. And we do these things. And it's like, he's like, yeah, that's cool. Remember when we thought we made it. But he doesn't want, my son doesn't want to be a rich kid. This episode is going to be like Call of Duty model or Guns Out or something.

And now it's just going to be unsubscribed. We're poor. And that's going to be it. Kevin poor shames the podcast. Yeah, Kevin poor shames the podcast. You know, okay, so here's the truth. So I bought my castle for two and a half million dollars

and we've spent like five nights there. No, it's a lot of money. I mean, that's the point. It's ironically the point. But now it's actually surprisingly not that much too. How how many rooms do you have in your fucking house 48 48 18 000 square feet so my my half my castle is probably worth seven million dollars now oh this is a good investment and my son is like but he doesn't get it my kid is my son he doesn't like being the rich kid and it's a whole

weird thing like my son only thrifts his clothes he hasn't shopped for clothes since he was 12 years old he only thrifts them he's like that's gonna he's just not into it yeah and and too but he came to me recently he's like dad when i show my friends pictures like we're playing Call of Duty, whatever, blah, blah, blah, and they're probably smoking weed and fucking off and getting bootleg tattoos and doing graffiti. He's like, those damn white kids. I tell my friends, it's like, we had MG42s on Trap Hot. We'd be like, blow shit up.

We're fucking badass. And I show them videos, and they're like, that's Photoshopped. And he's like, that's Photoshop. Yeah. And he's like, motherfucker, I told you. It's like what Brandon and I tell my son. It's like you realize people would have to win contests to do the shit that I invite you to do a couple times a week. And the people we hang out with and just all like a weekly occurrence for us is something that like that's that's why I like that like just even John and John's a really good kid like John's fucking great kid but I just see that same way so great my son's the same way my son came into so

I see my son every day but he's 19 you know he's like whatever he's got his own wing of the house. He comes up. Sometimes he shows up for breakfast. I didn't catch that until you left. Sometimes he's there for dinner. He's going to be Batman when you die. I hope he is. When you get shot in alley by a honey badger.

You're like, no! This is the shame of my life. I was recently dating. You didn't use the 151 crane. Well, get this. So my son recently, this was in the last three months probably. Sorry, I just thought of that meme. Like, gay dies. But my son comes in the kitchen i'm cooking dinner and there's a girl in a long t-shirt wearing nothing else and my son is like he comes like i hadn't

seen him in like a day or two he's old well he's 19 he's out doing shit and he got lost in his wing of the mansion yeah so sorry father i had to drive the got lost in his wing of the mansion. Sorry, Father. I had to drive the golf cart to this part of the house. I mean, that's my whore. She's cooking my meal. He comes in the kitchen. I don't want to know where he comes. He comes into the kitchen.

And I'm cooking. Are we still talking about whores? Yeah. Well, no, because she's she's wonderful she's an actress on like a big show oh she's an actress she's on a big net netflix show and it was in atlanta and i was in atlanta and i don't watch all that shit and i was out with some friends went to a party and it's like this chick who's a famous actress i didn't know was a famous actress and i'm there and i'm just like hanging out with the homies and you know

that's where i'm from that's the hood i'm like cool i'm like being cool as fuck i mean you guys know me i'm being cool as a motherfucker and then and she's like all talking to me and i'm like yo i know it's so lame but she was like just like desperately try to hold it together and i'm like god damn she's cute how is this bitch single and turns out she's famous but i didn't know this and i was like you know and to me I'm hanging out with the homies and I'm not thinking about that shit and I'm like god damn she's hot she's way too cute for me and so I'm just like whatever I'm doing

the thing I'm fixing her a drink I've made her an omelette I'm like what the fuck you want and she's like yeah I'm sorry that was your pickup line you made her an omelette I made her an omelette oh yeah dude you know how to make omelettes yeah I know how to make a fucking so it's like sorry it's more confusing we're stuck at that compared to walking down what's this hot bitch

doing in my god damn kitchen I didn't think she was in the kitchen at the time no my man is an executive at Netflix alright and so I'm in his place big ass place in Atlanta and you know it's like

is this before or after you fucked a bitch from Stranger Things? The same day. If you gotta know. Total fucking Hail Mary guess. And that's fucked up because my niece is on Stranger Things. Really? She's seven. Well, I didn't mean that.

Wait, is she your actual niece yes what so fuck y'all we're going back to my story okay original story wait we are there comes down hot actress my son comes but before this i'm like i'm in there kicking cooking breakfast i get up at like 9 a.m nobody gets up before 11 i'm cooking breakfast and the girl comes down and i was like god damn she's really beautiful and she has a twin an identical twin they both come down like it's like my fantasy that wasn't did you not know they were in your house it's a big mansion it wasn't my house but i'm cooking breakfast i use that excuse all the time yeah so i'm cooking

breakfast i'm cooking the omelets and shit i I'm cooking one for me, cooking one for my son, cooking one for his girlfriend. And whoever else comes down, like I'm just cooking omelets. And she comes down. So this girl, and I'm not going to name her. And she like comes down. She's like talking to me. And I'm like, you want an omelet? Like whatever.

I'm like, I'm bored of this bored of this well well to me it's like she's not interested in me i mean to me it's not because like i'm too cool it's just like she doesn't like me it's like you're really beautiful even just waking up do you want a fucking omelet like okay i don't need to be rejected by you too i'll make you an omelet just say what the fuck you want. Then her twin sister comes down. Who hurt you? My parents. God damn, man.

Her twin sister comes down. I'm like, God damn, they made two of y'all. Anyway, I'm like, whatever. Cooking breakfast. My son comes in. I'm making breakfast. The girl's flirting with me. I didn't really recognize it. My's like who is your girlfriend i was like

like no no it's like some actress bitch but i didn't know who she was so it turns out she's pretty famous just needs to wear where this is based i was just like i don't know like i made up some shit he's like the head i don't like you i was like you're an idiot go back to your room and so anyway and she's like hey what are you doing this afternoon i was like i don't know like fucking off what do you what she's like do you want to go do something? I was like, oh, God. Then I realized, because I think, like, she's like 30. It turns out, well, she's close to there. And I was like, I'm going to do this thing.

I don't know. What do you want me to do? She's like, can I take you to lunch? Oh, of course you could. And then, so we go to lunch and so she's like so uh i heard you own a gun company i was like yeah and i'm like this is a fucking gold digger i'm such a fucking douche yeah bitch i'm rich and i'm like what do you do and she's like oh I'm an actress I'm on this show and I was like

oh you make 10 times as much money as me I was like season 1 season 2 she's poor season 3 this is where I was like you know I'm 48 and she's like yeah I like older guys I was like you know I just

do this thing it doesn't make as much money as you she's like yeah so I need a guy that has his own thing and she's like, yeah, I like older guys. I was like, you know, I just do this thing It doesn't make as much money as you she's like, yeah, so I need a guy that has his own thing and I was like Did you not know who that was I was like nah, he's like she's on I'm not gonna say it but really show No, we will bleep it. on, I'm not going to say it, but I'm on a live show. We'll bleep it. No, I'm not going to say it. No, bleep it. No. My brother in Christ, you have to say this later. I have to fucking know this story after.

Wait, for real? Really? I was like, what? I know. And I was like, twins? And she's like, we don't do that. What? Yeah. Fuck me.

And I was like, she's like, I don't know. You're funny and not an actor. It's fine. I was like, I agree. His super power's real. I know. Kevin just has a big dick.

He passes out really fast. Wakes up, comes everywhere. I do while I'm sleeping. Oh my god. Okay, well that is that episode of Unsubscribe. Thank you guys so much for coming and hanging out. We're going to roll into the after thing.

Kevin, Brandon, Cody, where can we find you first? First of all, where can everyone find you? It's your mom's house. Okay, type that in. Buy a honey badger. At yourmomshouse.com. Buy a honey badger.

It's your mom's house. We'll see you on the next one.