Unsubscribe Podcast - 92 - Thoughts & Prayers ft. Caleb Francis & Savy Summer

Episode Date: February 10, 2023

Unsubscribe Podcast Ep92 - Thoughts & Prayers ft. @CalebwFrancis and @19savvysummer95 ​ WHAT IF WE JUST TALK ABOUT THE LAST OF US FOR LIKE 2 HOURS?! OK AND SOME OTHER STUFF. ALSO CALEB AND SAVY ARE ...BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ok bye. ------------------------------ GO FOLLOW @CalebwFrancis AND @19savvysummer95 https://www.instagram.com/calebwfrancis/?hl=en https://twitter.com/calebwfrancis https://www.youtube.com/c/CalebFrancisComedy/featured https://www.facebook.com/CalebFrancisComedy/ https://www.twitch.tv/grizzlypuncher https://www.tiktok.com/@savannahhsummerr https://www.twitch.tv/savysummer https://www.instagram.com/savysummer/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOKVXMJWReHOogd13zMrIxw ------------------------------ THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS!! Manscaped Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code UNSUB at Manscaped.com. That’s 20% off with free shipping at manscaped.com, and use code UNSUB. MANSCAPED® Beard Hedger, one stroke, one guard, 20 lengths. Adam & Eve Got to Adamandeve.com for VALENTINES DAY and use code UNSUB to get 50% Off and 100% Free Shipping - Code UNSUB! DraftKings Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code UNSUB. New customers can bet FIVE DOLLARS on Super Bowl Fifty Seven and get TWO HUNDRED IN FREE BETS INSTANTLY. Only at DraftKings Sportsbook with code UNSUB. Minimum age and eligibility restrictions apply. Void in Ohio. See show notes for details. ------------------------------ OUR MERCH: https://www.bunkerbranding.com/pages/unsubscribe-podcast JOIN THE PATREON NOW: https://www.patreon.com/UnsubscribePodcast WE HAVE A SUBREDDIT??? https://www.reddit.com/r/UNSUBSCRIBEpodcast/ CHECK OUT https://outofregz.com/ CODE: UNSUB http://gfuel.com/discount/baddie CODE: BADDIE ------------------------------ WHERE TO LISTEN Spotify https://spoti.fi/2Ye8YOU Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/3cbqY4k Amazon https://amzn.to/2YbzQia Google Play https://bit.ly/2YcWmaD Stitcher https://bit.ly/3cbnY8o MORE LINKS! https://linktr.ee/UnsubscribePodCast ------------------------------ Follow the Cast of Unsubscribe -Baddie- @Baddie Streams https://www.twitch.tv/baddie https://twitter.com/BaddieStreams https://www.instagram.com/baddiestreams/ https://www.youtube.com/baddiestreams -DonutOperator- @Donut Operator @Operation Donut https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwkm_Wcyh0pc7UUmZZfL-6w https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator/ https://www.twitch.tv/DonutOperator https://twitter.com/DonutOperator -Eli_Doubletap- @Eli Doubletap https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://www.twitch.tv/Eli_Doubletap https://twitter.com/Eli_Doubletap https://www.youtube.com/c/EliDoubletap ------------------------------ Edited by Fluck https://www.twitch.tv/fluck twitchcon 2022 reaction Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 So you're hosting the family barbecue this week, but everyone knows your brother is the grill guy, and it's highly likely he'll be backseat barbecuing all night. So be it. Impress even the toughest of critics with freshly prepared Canadian barbecue favorites from Sobeys. Crispy, I need lotion. Get your voice okay, bud. Yeah, I've just been coughing the last like two days pretty hard. Yeah I think when the power went out it I don't know what it was but like that night when I woke up
Starting point is 00:00:34 I felt like shit as oh Sorry, how long was your guy a whole day? Oh Yeah, I've got some cough drops in my pocket Cuz I know I'm going to laugh. And I'm going to be like, ugh, and then just like die. We just muted everything. That's the episode. Caleb dies and we're like, whoa, we've got an hour and 20 minutes left.
Starting point is 00:00:57 Caleb died pretty early. We're going to finish this one off. No, we keep it rolling. That's what I mean. We're going to finish this podcast. I'll just be like, ugh. He's just wheezing. You're still alive. I'm okay now. Did your power went out though?
Starting point is 00:01:13 Yeah. Dude, we were out for what? 18 hours? Yeah, it was midstream. It was like nine to like seven, something like that. The next day, like nine at night and came back on around seven. Oh, at least yours can't. See, ours was like, oh, we'll go off at like midnight and then come back on i was like okay and then
Starting point is 00:01:28 it would tease us it would kind of like come back on for like five minutes and we'd celebrate and then it would come back off and they scheduled a fucking power outage like we're taking down never came back on 8 a.m till midnight the next day videos to edit yeah it was great that's so crazy my power went out. And then three minutes later, it came back on and that was it. That's pretty nice. I literally told him, I was like, wherever Batty keeps moving, we need to move with him because he always seemed to have power. I never have issues whenever anything bad happens.
Starting point is 00:01:55 Like my place is always like, I'm good. Everyone's fine. What's going on? I had the heat turned up way too much. It was great. I was like, just in case, you know, it goes out. Yeah, you're sweaty. I'm nice and wet. I was like just in case It was real hot it was pretty yeah, I was eating gummies and it was great. I was having a great old time. Gummys.
Starting point is 00:02:26 Thanks for the invite. We appreciate it. I did. I lost a toe. Yeah, he did. I invited. My fingers. My whole penis fell off.
Starting point is 00:02:33 Yeah. He invited you? I literally was like, hey man, you guys come over. I know it's cold. But like don't expect big food. Side eye. Serious side eye.
Starting point is 00:02:40 I forgot to put on my turtleneck for my penis. Yeah, I forgot to wrap it up. It's a condom. I have a turtleneck for my penis. Yeah, I forgot to wrap it up. It's a condom. I have a turtleneck for your penis. Okay. It's called a condom. It's called a fur skin, actually. Yeah, it's called a fur skin.
Starting point is 00:02:54 A turtleneck for your penis is called a fur skin, actually. It's too early for fur skin. You just put a piece of bologna back over your penis. You style your fur skin. You can cut it to whatever shape you want. I'm going with a little side opening. Those edges are cool. Welcome to the Instagram podcast. As always, we have Eli Doltap, myself, Batty, and our two wonderful, amazing, sexy guests.
Starting point is 00:03:18 Batty, don't talk to my girlfriend that way. I'm talking to Caleb. He was looking at Caleb. I was looking into Caleb. Let me introduce people. We have Sammy Summer and of course Caleb Francis or Grizzly Buncher. What are you clapping? What are you drinking?
Starting point is 00:03:39 Oh, pineapple? Yes. We drink it now. It's your cum, good. It's triggered by tinnitus. The cum will taste amazing now. I'm gonna drink it myself. Oh man!
Starting point is 00:03:51 You wanna drink mine? What? You down? It counts as a round. I'll be back guys. I'm finally gonna try it. His head just dips under the table. Daddy, are you okay?
Starting point is 00:03:58 Oh, it sucks. Did we? I just triggered, no it was my clap. I just, oh. I can't hear how I'm doing. It's like a ringing in your ear. It's like, eh! What happened, what happened? Oh fuck. I just know it was my club. I just Bang there dude, holy shit. I don't know what I see that a minute. Okay, it's what to you atm Anybody in the comments blood if we ever triggered your tonight is my clapping Fuck you Is my clapping I hate it here, I do.
Starting point is 00:04:51 God damn. Welcome back, guys. You're finally back. I know. Comey puss herself. My family watched that episode. I can't wait to read that in the comments for the next three months Oh shit Yeah, they still come into my chair right now and they're like dude
Starting point is 00:05:22 Tell me My siblings were like why Why They still come into my chair right now and they're like, dude, tell me, puss. My siblings were like, why? Why? I didn't warn them. They just were excited to watch it because I told them a week prior that I was going to be on my first podcast. But they were all excited. This was your first podcast?
Starting point is 00:05:34 We ruined that, didn't we? Yeah. We'll make up for it this time. Pull out the old book. Oh, there we go. What are we talking about today? I hate it here. I hope the parents are ready for this one.
Starting point is 00:05:47 Parents, do they do anal? Shut up. You know your mom takes it in the bus. Do they make him a composter? No. No. He's still. How long has it been since the first podcast?
Starting point is 00:06:02 About a few months. Six months? A few months, yeah. Oh, since the last time you guys were on one? Yeah. It was like six months. If not more. At least six months.
Starting point is 00:06:10 And you still haven't met the parents, and you're going to talk about them doing it. You haven't met her parents yet. No, they're in Indiana. Yeah, we just. Get on a fucking plane. And go to Indiana. I flew to Tennessee a bunch. Tennessee's pretty cool, actually.
Starting point is 00:06:24 Tennessee's not great, actually. I've been to Tennessee as much. I've had a pretty good time in Tennessee. They've got some really nice hiking. There's just a lot of really shitty country music. I don't really, I'm not a big fan of country music anyway, so we just went and we got, like, drunk on the moonshine testing, and then we went to a wine tasting,
Starting point is 00:06:40 and they're just like, here, taste all of our wine and all of our whiskey, and then you're trashed. And then we went and did those professional cowboy photos where you dress up with the whole room and you just dress up as like they have all the cowboy attire so you went to a cavendish basically yeah i was like i'm not a drunk as shit taking cowboy photos it was hilarious i was so sweaty in it because i was like drunk i'm not a fan of country and you're like my cowboy photos were fantastic and then yesterday's ig it's you oh yeah like drinking gravy oh yeah yeah and doing this on my gravy mustache made me want to die it was so funny because we filmed a lot of and i had made the gravy prior so it
Starting point is 00:07:19 started like congealed uh like it was still clumpy it was still hot underneath but that top layer was like a thick skin skin of gravy So I was having to like shake it around and get it like in Like and that was it had real bits of turkey in it. So it was like a very you're having lunch So I was dancing around drinking some gravy is a good time. Whose idea was that? It was his idea. Okay, so. Fuck you. Oh, yeah. So I'm friends with Young Gravy, and he hit me up. He's like, dude. He's like, my new song just came out.
Starting point is 00:07:51 He's like, I'd love it if you made a video using it. I was like, shit, too easy. I was like, I'm going to dress up as a cowboy. I'm going to drink gravy. He's like, sounds great. Young Gravy. I did it. I can't wait to meet him.
Starting point is 00:08:01 I really want to meet him. Oh, that's what. He would come out here if we, like, What's up? He's talked about hanging out. He's like, dude, he's like, yeah. He's like, if I come through there, man, he's like, I'm getting you to the concert.
Starting point is 00:08:12 He's like, we got to hang out. He's like, I want to hang out. He's like, yeah. I was like, dude, we got to get you out there. I was like, we'll do some cool shit. We'll go to the range. We'll do a podcast. We'll blow stuff up.
Starting point is 00:08:20 And I figured you guys would be into that, too. Tell him we know some single moms, too. Yeah. Stop! That's his thing. He's really into it. No, no, I know that. single moms too yeah that's the guy you showed me he will love single moms yeah no i'm always bumping gravy i got him all over bad radio really well yeah it's fun yeah he's a cool guy that's okay that video makes way more sense yeah i thought it was just a separate thing. No, no. It was just gravy. You know what I'm all about? Drinking gravy, yeah. I mean, it's ridiculous, but Dave came over. Yeah, it's on my video. Dave came over because he had to be there anyways.
Starting point is 00:08:52 And I was like, hey, can you help me shoot this really quick? He's like, yeah. So he filmed it really well. So it looks good and good transition. Everybody's like, what the fuck is this? They're like, I love this. Can your fans watch you do anything? I was like, it's so dumb but it was like enjoyable because the music like lined up perfect you were just having a good time every time you're 20 minutes to do too like and he
Starting point is 00:09:12 like edited it in no time i was like fuck yeah i just like that's what i love about your content it's just off the wall and it's like you just have whatever idea yeah and i love that you laugh at the end of some of your takes you're like why god would i ever do that yeah because a lot of it i try to just like say it like i i don't like i usually don't have like a general idea of what i'm doing like i you try to you try to try to add limit yeah like i try to uh just riff it so sometimes i'm like oh that was so fucking stupid i like i like crack up myself but uh yeah yeah that's how most of them are and i so i i seems like people like to see the little breaks in characters i like i usually leave like at least a little bit of it in it sometimes
Starting point is 00:09:53 especially if i do it i i think it's yeah speak on your intrusive thoughts there's a lot of success in that yeah yeah it works a lot of intrusive thoughts all the out. All the time, man. All the time, I mean. All the time, man. All the time. All day, every day. Let's hear one, Caleb. It's crazy. Well, I forgot we did that for the, people were talking about the messed up shit. They're like, man, Maddie checked out when you guys were talking about the last portion.
Starting point is 00:10:17 I was like, what? And they're like, with the babies on the ground. I was like, what are you talking about? It's like, as a male, as a seahorse, I was like, oh my God. I was like, oh yeah, my god but once they make a pile and then you fall on your side they just crawl to you it's like a me can't we get it yeah i'm dizzy and i like fall down and they just only fall like an inch. Well, you remember?
Starting point is 00:10:49 And then the last one pulls out the udder. Oh, yeah. It's attached to it. It's like the last cord is attached to the other and it pops it out. Yeah. And then they feed on you. What's hard is I'm in between you two, so I'm just like trying to keep up with them. There's just like a hundred nipples there.
Starting point is 00:11:04 A hundred udders. A hundred udders. I'm going to go out on the record and say a 100 nipples 100 udders I'm gonna go out on the record and say 100 nipples is too many That's a lot Imagine the sound it would make though Like 2, 3 even It's an accordion for some reason You know how like that little dangly thing on the door of the doorstop? The one that's like...
Starting point is 00:11:26 It'd just be like a hundred of those. I like that they make that sound. Those are so long. These are udders, man. These are long. Those babies need to be able to crawl and get it. This isn't normal human nipples. This is udders.
Starting point is 00:11:38 It's like just long nipples. Just long. Yeah, these are pinky sized at least, dude. Give those babies something to suck up on. Yeah, they're are pinky sized at least, dude. Give those babies something to suck up. Yeah, they're trying to really suck up on that.
Starting point is 00:11:47 It's just being the back of their throat. Yeah, they gotta like gnaw on it with their jaw, dude. It has been 12 minutes and I am just,
Starting point is 00:12:01 I just did. You're just sweating. He's making, oh, oh, the doctor walks in and pats your head. You're just sweating He's making The doctor walks in and pats your head You're doing great I'm kind of like gravy This is why God did not give y'all the ability To have boobs or nipples
Starting point is 00:12:16 Or to feed children with it Because y'all would abuse it Guys have nipples babe Yeah sure For boy milk For boy milk. For boy milk. For boy milk. That's a nipple.
Starting point is 00:12:31 I didn't know about boy milk. You don't know? I'm here for BetRivers online casino and sportsbook with poker icon Phil Hellmuth. Thanks to BetRivers, I'm also a slots icon. Great. And a same game parlay icon. Cool, cool. A blackjack icon, a line icon A roulette icon
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Starting point is 00:12:55 If you have questions or concerns about your gambling Or someone close to you Please contact Connex Ontario At 1-866-531-2600 To speak to an advisor free of charge Boy milk? Yeah, you've had my boy milk This boy milk.
Starting point is 00:13:06 Sad. This boy milk is rotten. I'm pretty curious. What's going on with this boy milk? Why is it expired? It's hot. It's spicy. He's just eating Doritos and Mountain Dew and he's just like acid. You're looking down with like Dorito dust.
Starting point is 00:13:22 What? What are you talking about? God, this burns. You're just looking down with like Dorito dust. I'm like, what? What? What? What are you talking about? God, this burns. My boy milk's gone sour. The boy milk's sour? My boy milk's gone sour. I'm sorry, babe. Are you okay?
Starting point is 00:13:36 Are you all right? Why are you gagging? I'm crying. I don't want to add to this. Yeah, you should. Don't, Sav. Keep going. Keep going.
Starting point is 00:13:44 Let's hear it. No, it's okay keep going it smells my intrusive thoughts almost took over that's what we want yeah that's what we're here for this is the intrusive thoughts podcast i might need another shot for that one oh okay i'll go get one yeah i'll do one with us? Oh, yeah. Breaking news! Manscaped now sells beard product! Woo!
Starting point is 00:14:13 I had to get rid of my address. Why did you scream so... I didn't scream. It's so breaking. It's breaking news. Can you open the box? Open the box. Let me see. I have a beard here.
Starting point is 00:14:20 You don't have a beard. You pull your beard out. Okay, so comb, brush. No, stop. Just give me the whole box. You're gonna read. Give me beard out. Okay, so comb, brush. Give me, no, stop. Just give me the whole box. You're gonna read, give me the box. Okay, I'll do this. Give me the box right now.
Starting point is 00:14:29 Okay, but I want the conditioner. Here. Oh my God. Oh my God. That's right! They are once again revolutionizing men's grooming with brand new Beard Hedger Pro Kit. I really like the box it comes in too.
Starting point is 00:14:43 I used your brush. I just realized this is your kit, not my into. I used your brush. I just realized this is your kit, not my kit. I used your brush. Thank you. We'll trade brushes. There's red pubes in there now. I mean, I'll still use that brush as you continue to use my brush. There we go. From the technology behind that Beard Hedge Pro kit allows you to shape your signature beard look
Starting point is 00:15:06 now you can finally use manscaped products to make your drapes match your carpet and use it and use it code unsub for 20 if you have a beard and you need a comb and a brush some kind of bristle brush. I cannot stress this enough. This has nothing to do with Manscaped. I love you, Manscaped. But you need these to take care of your chin pubes. I just got the carpet and the drapes got me.
Starting point is 00:15:36 Oh, it's got beer shampoo. Dude, your carpet. By going to manscaped.com and using code UNSUB and saving 20% off and free shipping. Look at that. I contact the entire time. Tire time. You're using my scissors now too.
Starting point is 00:15:54 You're just, is that your kit now? Talking points. It's my favorite part of the ad. When Eli reads the talking points, we just apply this. I really enjoy this product. This is beer conditioner.
Starting point is 00:16:10 I've never used a beer conditioner. You got a white spot on your face. It all starts with the beard hedger. This thing is a juggernaut of fixing faces. Batty, fix your face. First off, this cordless trimmer has rotary wheel that gives you 20 positions of precision, all with one guard. So no more messy drawers full of extra add-ons that's right face grooming doesn't need to be hard get 20 different links in just one guard actually i really like can i see that everything in the box you really
Starting point is 00:16:37 do have a white spot on your cheek just yep there you go you got it Wait, how does this work? Guard. Oh, it goes straight into it. Oh, that's actually dope. Watch. Oh, and it moves it on its own. Okay, that's pretty cool. That's pretty cool. Oh, I've always looked for this in a freaking trimmer. Because I always trim short.
Starting point is 00:16:59 So this is actually really cool. It's one piece, it's cordless, but you have 18 different clip-ons that change the the length it just it raises or lowers the guard yeah so you have an individual one you just rotate this it gives you the i'm guessing centimeters or meters i'm gonna let you guys know yes this is for beards you can use it on your pubes too yeah dude okay manscape that's dope i this this by itself i'd do it and it comes in that nice little thing boom thatped, that's dope. This by itself, I'd do it. And it comes in that nice little thing, boom. I mean, that's the only time,
Starting point is 00:17:30 that is my selling point right there. That one thing, I don't know about you, Batty, I hate a hole brush. Oh, yours is the brush in that thing. You need a good beard brush. I have a beard, look at my beard. You need a beard brush. You don't have a beard brush,
Starting point is 00:17:42 your shit's gonna fall apart and it's gonna be gross. Dude, and they got a... Beard conditioner. I've never used beard brush. You don't have a beard brush, your shit's gonna fall apart and it's gonna be gross. Dude, and they got a... Beard conditioner. I've never used beard conditioner. Cause I have like... Beard shampoo and conditioner. Yeah, but you have like a soft one. I have like bristly.
Starting point is 00:17:52 No, mine is not soft at all. Oh, yours is like... It's like hard, angry. Yeah, straight up. I have coarse Mexican ginger hair. The Pro Beard Kids also with three free gifts. The beard brush, a comb and scissors, which uses all three of my gifts. You literally use all three free gifts.
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Starting point is 00:18:22 No, code UNSUB at manscaped. No code unsub at manscape.com Got you guys. There's my mixer. Do you need a mixer? It's a shot. Oh, dude Normie shot. I'm normie shy. Yeah, I like it straight. No chaser. Okay ready? Yeah straight. No chaser No, it's true the beautiful Yeah, yeah, I love you guys cheers. Oh yeah, cheers and to all you beautiful people Talkers. Yeah, yeah. Love you guys. Cheers. Love you. Cheers. And to all you beautiful people out there. Yeah, fuck them. Oh, that's vodka. Oh.
Starting point is 00:18:49 That's vodka. Oh, it's vodka. That's not. Oh, my God. You need to learn how to do shots. I pace myself. That's not a shot. I mean.
Starting point is 00:18:58 I'm small. You don't pace yourself on a shot. I'm small. I'm disappointed in you. Last time I took three shots, we talked about coming pussy. So what are you talking about? Can we push? What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:19:09 Can we go? Can you say it louder? My poor siblings though. They were not. So anyways, so the, with the first thing I was like, okay,
Starting point is 00:19:16 this is going to like take place. And they were super excited and they watched it. And they're like, you didn't warn us. It's like, they didn't warn me. They didn't warn me. They didn like, they didn't warn me. They didn't warn me either.
Starting point is 00:19:27 I don't want to know what you learned. They're just putting their heads in the air. This is a naughty podcast. They just kept skipping it until they thought the coast was clear
Starting point is 00:19:35 and they were like, okay. They scroll forward a little bit and it's like, you learned. Yeah. They scroll forward
Starting point is 00:19:40 a little bit and it's like, you learned. They're just like, shoving stuff in your mouth. They're like, no. Why are you doing that on the podcast? Why just scrubbing through through it's like what your dad's walking in and just throwing the baby
Starting point is 00:20:01 Shit that's been on this podcast. No. I don't want to know. It's pretty good. It's pretty good stuff. People are always, like, bringing up stuff. Like, remember this time you said this? I'm like, no. I have bought. I leave this house. And the thoughts.
Starting point is 00:20:15 It's here. It's all just in here. Do you guys actually check out? Like, you don't remember anything when you leave? It's haunted. There's a lot of things. But I forget a lot of this shit. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:21 There's people who ask me about shit in the chat, too. And I'm like, hmm. It's like, I don't think we said that bro. For a little bit longer I'm like oh okay yeah. And then they'll hit me with a time slip and I'm like oh fuck I did something. And then I look at the table and it's just covered in white cloth and there's a vodka bottle tipped over empty.
Starting point is 00:20:35 I'm like that's why I get it. That's that thought. But the next morning after H last night they're like yeah you slept with that person. You're like huh? Are you sure? His name's Eli. I'm right here. You slept with that dude. She's still like, I keep her drunk the entire time.
Starting point is 00:20:51 Yeah, she doesn't know it. She secretly has like a shitload of vodka. She finds me a tractor. She's asleep. She like wakes up when there's like needle spots on her ass. She's like, what the fuck? You've just been injecting vodka into her ass. I'm like, baby, you were drunk the fuck? You've just been injecting vodka into her ass. I'm like, baby, you were drunk last night.
Starting point is 00:21:07 You've just been doing this the whole time. Don't worry about it. Vodka injections? In the ass? Anywhere? I don't know. I've had to be ass cheeked. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:21:13 Have you seen that? That's where the shots go. Yeah, that's where most shots go. Thoughts and shots. Yeah. That's where it like fills the less sensitive the quickest, is the cheeks. That's why nobody comes over.
Starting point is 00:21:23 There's just a chair in the corner, and he just has an IV that sets up every night. I haven't hit an IV bar in a minute. I've never done that. I would like to do that. You've never done an IV bar? I would love to.
Starting point is 00:21:36 It's a great time. Do they have them here in San Antonio? I used to go damn near every couple weeks. Yeah, they're all over here. I knew Cody would go all the freaking time Before you start dating people Not only that I found the The IV bar was really helping my migraines, like
Starting point is 00:22:06 getting like vitamins, because you can get all sorts of crazy shit in the actual IVs and get like B12 shots, all sorts of shit in the IVs. And my migraines fucked off for like a solid month while I was getting, you know, IVs. Dude, that's dope. It's crazy. From commutes that become learning sessions to dishwashing filled with laughs, podcasts can help you make the most out of your everyday. And when it comes to everyday spending,
Starting point is 00:22:28 you can count on the PC Insider's World Elite MasterCard to help you earn the most PC Optimum points everywhere you shop. The PC Insider's World Elite MasterCard, the card for living unlimited. Conditions apply to all benefits. Visit pcfinancial.ca for details. Matthew's like, I don't know where my vitamins are. Is he eating gummy bears and chicken nuggies. To be fair, I take like three daily vitamins. There's B12 in these gummy bears, I swear.
Starting point is 00:22:49 I really do. You eat vitamins? Yeah, every fucking morning. Actually, today I only took one of my three because I ran out of there too. I got to order those. I picture they're Flintstones. I really, I really wish. I can be like, yeah, I eat Flintstones because that's funny as hell.
Starting point is 00:23:03 I don't. I take some Flintstones gummies every now and then cuz Katie gets them for the girls They're good! They're so good! Yeah, sometimes I'm just there when she's giving them to her. She's like you want some? I'm like, yeah sure. Can't be bad. I'll pop a few. Kids' gummies are way better. I need to grow! I need to grow! I need to grow!
Starting point is 00:23:22 I need to grow! Just drink in the bottle. Yeah, I heat it up until it's a goo. Is that just Robitussin at that point? Pour a shot into it, it's like Robitussin. I want to make like a nerd's rope out of them. Gummy nerd's rope, but it's like all vitamins. Could do that.
Starting point is 00:23:42 You're like, I'm going to turn into a super hero. Hard cut, do you have a giant tumor? But it's like all vitamins could do that. You're like I'm gonna turn You have really callous feet though. I hate that image so much. Huge Flintstone feet. Just to be very clear, don't eat the entire bottle of Flintstone gummies. Too many good vitamins is bad. That's a thing. Very bad. Anything in surplus is bad for you.
Starting point is 00:24:21 Like four Advil is great. 30 Advil is a hospital trip. Money also and vagina. What? I don't know know too much vagina might be bad that is yeah you get there's like a bunch of vaginas oh a whole bunch of vaginas smacking on you at the same time that would get annoying yeah oh you drown yeah you were drowned and this is related this sound would be terrible it's just like smacking it'd be a wet clap hitting you in the just wet claps breaking your nose and stuff dude dude breaking in the nose and you're bleeding and it's just clapping weird wet sounds too many vaginas could kill a man i need more booze to be honest i hope i die via too many vagina that sounds pretty cool it's
Starting point is 00:25:01 a good way to die you got smashed by 100 vaginas. A hundred. Although you'd rather go by Henry Cavill's dick than 100 vaginas, I feel like. Ooh, that would be a hard one. Henry HSD. I love him. But what are you going to die by? Can I choose Pedro Pascal? We need a Papa P fucking. I know.
Starting point is 00:25:18 He's taking it on. Pedro, you want to come on the podcast? You want to come for the podcast? You want to please come and meet? Come on the podcast Pager Pascal the boys daddy issues, okay? Yeah, we know Cardboard wet just like falling over because the bottom side Floor so fucking wet the card was getting soggy There's a snail trail. This snail trail. I love, I love Papa P too.
Starting point is 00:26:20 As long as it's not just me. No, I am right there with you. Are you getting the fan edits on your TikTok right now? How did you even get that? You know what's crazy is I didn't ask to be there, but I want to be there now. And I'll click on it. You do it.
Starting point is 00:26:34 Stop it. I'm just picturing something. Stop it. Stop it. A snail chub. They're still standing. But one's like starts in his mouth and a snail chub just goes all the way down across the floor.
Starting point is 00:26:45 That's a lot of cums How did you do that? That's not how this works! Check the security camera, Sam's like Eeeh Wait, wait, is it this like the, like I'm possessed and I'm just like Yeah, you're literally crawling You're like a cat that comes in the cat
Starting point is 00:26:59 You're like a cat No, it's like hereditary, you just see him in the wall Oh my god She's turned on, watch out Dear god, she becomes like aneditary. You just see him in the wall. Oh, my God! She's turned on. Watch out. Dear God. She becomes like an actual demon when she's horny. It's so scary. It's so much power.
Starting point is 00:27:11 Paranormal com-activity. Like, what the fuck? Oh, my God. The exorcism of her fucking... What's he like? What is that? Mother and Daddy. Instead of his thing, she squirts. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:19 Her pussy's horny. Sal, what are you doing? Oh, shit. You... Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Sal, what are you doing? Oh, shit, you. What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:27 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:29 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:30 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:30 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:30 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:31 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:31 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:31 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:31 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:32 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:27:45 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? When I woke up this morning, I didn't think we'd be talking about me squirting on the podcast. I'm not going to lie. That's your fault. You decided. I just wanted to bring up Pedro Pascal. You chose violence. You can't just be like, I want to bring up Pedro Pascal. Have you seen him? With his glasses.
Starting point is 00:28:00 And his right in the beard. And he like acknowledged it too. He's like, call me daddy. I'm like. Did you send me the call me daddy thing? Somebody sent me the interview. He's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's
Starting point is 00:28:09 like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like,all need help for Valentine's Day because you're like us. Sad, lonely, and depressed. So, Azar, you could use a little help. Eli, what do we have to help our wonderful viewers today for their Valentine's Day sadness? Well, now this is a completely different ad thing because I was going to say, maybe you guys are going to get laid this week. And if you want to.
Starting point is 00:28:44 They're not. But now, Batty wants to go this this route which i'm completely fine with say 50 right now at adamandeve.com on your favorite blow-up doll maybe i don't that's what you're gonna need you're gonna have to you're gonna have to head over to avenue.com and uh and probably buy something there for yourself whether that be um a plug can we say a plug yeah you can say whatever you want maybe i don't know 50 off on valentine's you can have that spicy sex with whomever you want i don't care get whatever toy to put in them you want to fill your holes this is the website you fill your holes with because Adam and Eve.
Starting point is 00:29:25 Fill your holes with AdamandEve.com is freaking dope. Plus, I like kinky stuff. I don't like my holes filled particularly. That's not my thing. He does. But maybe you do, and that's awesome. I'm more of like an S&M guy where I dominate.
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Starting point is 00:29:56 It's a free shipping. Free shipping as well. Yeah, it's free shipping too. I love... I'm all about... Man. What are the things called that you jerk off into? A tissue?
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Starting point is 00:30:41 Your Valentine's Day could go many ways. Him? Him? Him? He's not going to have a problem. 60 seconds. We're done. We're done. We're done.
Starting point is 00:30:48 Okay. AdamEve.com. Code unsub. 50% off and free shipping. Thanks, guys. Spice up your night and life. Do you know how he got the role for Game of Thrones? The Red Viper?
Starting point is 00:31:01 Was that the one? He did the interview. Was that the one where he forgot he got it? No, that was. There are very few things that you can be certain of in life. the red Viper. Was that the one he did the interview? Was that the one where he, he forgot he got it? No, that was, there are very few things that you can be certain of in life, but you can always be sure the sun will rise each morning. You can bet your bottom dollar that you'll always need air to breathe and
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Starting point is 00:31:35 Blast of us. Did you hear about that? Blast of us. Oh my, he got the role? I told you that one, yeah. I watched the interview for that. So, Pedro Pascal got the call. It was super late at night cuz he with the
Starting point is 00:31:45 Producers are the in the UK right yeah, and he got the role, but it was like fucking took Ambien He's like I need to go to sleep. It's super late. He took an Ambien He was anxious about not getting the role so he took the Ambien to fall asleep, and they call him They're like hey you got the role He was like hell. Yeah, I went to bed cuz he was on Ambien well the next morning like man I hope I get that roll. He forgot he got it Because he took the Ambien people were texting Do you guys know something
Starting point is 00:32:15 I always forget about the red viper that that he was in there because That that in the scene I'll never forget that Yeah, I'll never forget that part Oh, I killed him grabs that guy with a dick. Oh, yeah, he grabbed some wee-wee in that too. I mean fuck. Oh, yeah He was fucking everybody what yeah? Yeah, but they had um so for the last of us with the red viper one of his You said for the last sorry us with the Red Viper, one of his students. Hold on, hold on. You said for the last of us. Sorry, Game of Thrones. Game of Thrones, Last Viper.
Starting point is 00:32:49 Game of Thrones, Last Viper. There we go. His student, a student came and was like, hey, I'm trying out for this role. Can you give me tips? So he's like, oh yeah, boom, boom, boom. And then the student left. He was like, got it. And then he tried out for the role.
Starting point is 00:33:02 He snuck in. Yeah, he snuck in. That happens in Friends. With Joey, with the guy he's training. Have you guys seen that? No. I don't watch Friends. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:33:13 Go ahead. Joey tries to steal an audition from one of the people he's teaching. Go ahead. Sorry. Sorry. Does he steal it? No, he doesn't get it. He doesn't get it.
Starting point is 00:33:21 Friends, spoilers, guys. Hold on. The student gets it. Joey doesn't. Good. Fuck Joey. That was a bad move. It's not a good friend move. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:34 Sounds like Jennifer and Friends ever again. Rachel. Him and Rachel. Did you say Jennifer? Joey dates pretty much everyone. Her real name. I know that part. I don't know. Rachel Green. Did you say Jennifer? Yeah. Joey dates pretty much everyone. Her real name. Yeah, her real name. Jennifer Aniston. I know that part.
Starting point is 00:33:47 I don't know who. Rachel Green. Oh, is that a last name too? What's their address? What are all of their, what are their full names? Everybody. Monica Geller is Courtney Cox. Joey Trebiani is, oh, fuck.
Starting point is 00:34:05 We'll go, Matt LeBlanc thank you Matthew Perry is Chandler Bong is that his name Bong? Chandler Bong yeah Ross Geller is sister to Monica and he is David Schwimmer god I'm getting so hard right now um wait hold on
Starting point is 00:34:21 Phoebe Buffay is I don't remember her name that's a kudro thank you damn what that's caitlin's crush caitlin's like i've always had a thing for lisa kudro i mean they're near the end of the seasons i've never been like man she's pretty hot because she's like always like kind of flirty in like a dirty way with everybody and even if she's not serious about it she's just a very, yeah. Yeah. I like that.
Starting point is 00:34:48 I can probably sing most of the intro to friends. That's about it. Maybe. I can do the whole thing. I used to clap every time. Dude. Every now and then, every now and then I get in a kick. Your job's a joke,
Starting point is 00:34:58 you're broke, your love's life, DOA. I can do the whole thing. I'm getting a kick and rewatch the whole thing every now and then. Really?
Starting point is 00:35:04 Yeah, dude. The office too. A lot people like don't like it. And once they get a little bit into it, they're like, okay. It's a good day show. You start to like them as a group is the thing. Like you start to like them as friends. Exactly. You said the thing.
Starting point is 00:35:19 And you're like, okay, I like this dynamic. And then you look for that in all friendships going forward. And then you start like, dude, I'll like dude. I'll care Lisa Kudrow Don't know what I'm watching it. I like catch myself Rachel green the whole time Watch it. I'm like he'd have to know smiling like an idiot the whole fucking time dude And I think it's because I like grew up watching it when I was a little so it's like a almost Nostalgic and it kind of makes me feel like a little kid But I feel like I'm one of their friends at the same time something man i'm like into it i love some i forget we're the same age
Starting point is 00:35:47 that's probably why we think about it the same way yeah it's like all you all the viewers out there friends i have tried watching friends so many times yeah a lot of people are like that and uh i know it's a good show i'm not gonna sit here and say friends is a bad show just this is the crazy thing about people. We like different things occasionally. And just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's not bad. It's so crazy. Right here, if someone doesn't put that on a t-shirt,
Starting point is 00:36:11 I'm gonna go. Yeah, put it on a t-shirt. Just because you don't like something doesn't mean it's not bad. It's a lot of words. I understand that. It's a lot of reading. It's fine.
Starting point is 00:36:19 You'll live. I don't like it. Yeah, I know you don't. It's too much. It's too much. I get this constantly. Being on the internet and playing video games. People are like, oh. You like that how dare you not more so that people who like like realistic shooters your Tarkov's your daisies your survival games you bring up fortnight
Starting point is 00:36:47 They feel like you just asked them to join the cult of satan yeah they're like how dare you motherfucker just because you're not the target audience of something doesn't mean it's not great like fortnite is a it's an amazing game yeah it's pretty and it keeps i hate it yeah but motherfucker if i can't see what is done for gaming for for battle royales for survival for shooters everybody's pulling from that they've done things so right. Just because you don't like the aesthetic or the visuals of a game doesn't mean it's not a bad game. Yeah, like so many games have taken so many aspects from Fortnite. Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:37:15 And like, once we were like, oh, they're just copying Fortnite. But once they're like, this is actually pretty awesome. I'm glad they put this in here. It was like Woe and World of Warcraft became the the cookie cutter paste of every MMO so every let's go I'm gonna let you finish your story then we're gonna come back to this what's like go for tonight is like that where you have him you have World of Warcraft and you have for tonight they are what spawned a wow oh we just gotta copy this to the T and
Starting point is 00:37:43 we'll just use everything like this and if they're for fortnight I didn't building aspect but even then a lot of people still had building it was like oh we gotta do Just copy this and we'll just rebrand it and you were good. Yeah Yeah, you like it though. You called it. Whoa not Wow Make sure every knows you has a fucking idiot. Whoa. He's tired. Well we I'm supposed to make excuses for him. That's what it is What's your favorite position This is cool with me. It's not my favorite, but I'll do it for you. I thought he was actually asking. I'm so sorry.
Starting point is 00:38:26 Are you filming a TikTok right now? Shut the fuck up. The person comes around. He's like, comment one in the section if you like doggy. Comment two if you like missionary. Missionary with the lights on. No, the lights on? Yeah, you're trying to really stare them in the eyes, dude.
Starting point is 00:38:45 They gotta be dim. That's lovemaking. Caleb gets it. Caleb gets it. I can't look at them. He's like, Caleb's playing, let's get it on. Yeah, we got feelings. I can't look at them in the face, dude.
Starting point is 00:38:54 Look at those feelings. If I've got feelings, I can't look at them in the face. It's over in no time then, dude. I can't be like staring into their eyes. Those are those 60 second plays, dude. I need to look at the headboard too I need to leave the headboard I need to see something else cause I'm about to fucking fall in love with you He's close at George Washington, Abraham Lincoln
Starting point is 00:39:10 I'm so in love Tell me when you're gonna Tell me when you're gonna crumb You're just like this You just blast That's what you do I'm constantly trying to look around I'm trying to just make it like sexy So I'm just like looking at'm constantly trying to look around. I'm trying to just make it sexy.
Starting point is 00:39:25 So I'm just looking at boobs and trying to look at everything else. And then if I look at her. This is Blake. It's a really nice thread count. I like her sheets. This is nice. This is really good. Don't focus on the weirdest things.
Starting point is 00:39:34 Wait, look me in my eyes real quick. No. I don't. Just come. It's a race, and I'm always going to win. Her eyes are a window to my home. I like that. Her eyes are a window to my comb I like that Her eyes are a window to my comb
Starting point is 00:39:47 He's like you mean soul right I comb when I look into her eyes I open those windows up and I shoot I shoot right out those windows I'm just going to look at Henry Those windows are covered Splattered cover and smothered We're on a Waffle House after right
Starting point is 00:40:01 That's why you tell me not to come until you come I get it now You holding off Like this whisper bullshit, don't you? Yeah, I don are just like making out. You guys are just sick. You want to make out? You guys match energy. You guys match energy.
Starting point is 00:40:32 Wait, you see who goes further? They're like, red X. No. Well, these two start kissing, so we start kissing. What's the old military thing? What is it? Gay chicken. Gay chicken. Gay chicken.
Starting point is 00:40:45 Let's play gay chicken, but with the group. And so me and him are over here, and you guys are like, who's going to go further? I think it was me and Matt. Me and Matt were drinking. We were all bullshit as a group somewhere. I think we were at a party at Shaw Show, and we played gay chicken. Neither of us won. Or maybe we both won.
Starting point is 00:41:02 Both won. I think we both won. Depends on how you look at it. We both won. Or how Tay looks at it. According to the entire or maybe we both won. Both won. I think we both won. Depends on how you look at it. We both won. Or how Tay looks at it. According to the entire internet, we both won. Well, mostly me. I won.
Starting point is 00:41:12 Matt didn't really win. He didn't win a lot. I'm a ginger. He got his first ginger. That's a win for Matt. You're special, buddy. I don't know. You were Matt's first. These are the lines that are dead, and then you stop it. I don't know. You were last first.
Starting point is 00:41:26 These are the lines that are dead, and then you stop it. I'm not special. Oh, my God. You're so special. Side note. You're my first one. Side note. Have you seen Babylon?
Starting point is 00:41:37 It goes fucking forward. It is Quentin Tarantino to the extreme without being Quentin Tarantino. It is fucking insane. Is this a new thing? It's a new movie. It's rapid. You said it goes hard and then asked if he was good. It was like a Tarantino on absurd.
Starting point is 00:41:52 You know how Tarantino goes hard on violence, like whatever it is. Wait, is it a Tarantino film? No, but it feels like it. It's just the story's not as good. It feels like they were going for shock value to get a good rating, but what it did. It feels like they were going for shock value to get a good rating, but what it did is it ruined what they were going for.
Starting point is 00:42:07 They were going for the cinematic art behind how long Hollywood's been a thing, and they just shock value after shock value with like nudity, bodily fluids, and just very- Those are my favorite things. You think so. You think so,
Starting point is 00:42:20 but until an elephant shits on someone's face, you're like, well, I'm not really about the movie anymore. I watched Ace Ventura before. That's three minutes in, and it is a full-on elephant, like, shitting on a dude's purse. And it just keeps shitting. Pee-pees and pussies everywhere. Okay, speaking of that, really quick.
Starting point is 00:42:38 Oh, boy. Every journey I take leaves a lasting impact. Traveling the world only makes me realize just how much more there is to explore no one builds a legacy by standing still start your journey at remover.com so when I was a kid what's that guy's name that does the Borat movies? What's, what's his name? Uh, Sasha Baron Cohen. Yeah. Uh, so I don't know if you guys ever seen this movie he was in.
Starting point is 00:43:11 Uh, it's called like the brothers Brigsby or something like that. That sounds really familiar. And he's like, uh, wherever the fuck places that love soccer so much. Uh, but like in the,
Starting point is 00:43:22 the ghetto versions, like a, a ghetto uk dude who's like walking around like going to pubs yeah yeah yeah yes there's a hooligan yeah and it's like uh it's super fucking goofy he's a hooligan but he was like an orphan when he was younger and his like little brother and him like they both got adopted by different people and the other brother got adopted by like fancy famous family or whatever and he grew up to become like a secret agent and then he's like nasty hooligan that's like i got all these kids and they're mean as shit have you guys seen this
Starting point is 00:43:55 if you guys haven't seen this you have to fucking watch it is so insane and it's like right before movies started having to get really pg again yeah but it's like there's a there's a trauma thunder era there's a scene where they're hiding from uh like there's like this you know bad group of like hit men chasing after him and his brother and they're like out in africa and they climb inside of an elephant's vagina to hide and like it shows like they're like these guys are like yeah and they're inside of an elephant's vagina and And he, like, takes his head out to look. And he's like, all right, the coast is clear. But right when they go start crawling out, like, a male elephant is, like, charging towards him.
Starting point is 00:44:31 And he goes, oh, no. And he's backed in. And the other brother's like, what's going on? He's like, we're about to, he's like, get ready. And, like, a giant elephant dick comes in and just starts, like, smacking him in the face. And he's like, oh, God. And it's, like, beating the hell out of him in there. And he's like, we have to jack him off so we get it,
Starting point is 00:44:46 like so it gets over quicker. So they're like rubbing its dick, and it's like going in, and it shows an elephant. It's like, oh. They're inside it, like stroking. And then he's like, cradle the boss, cradle the boss. You see the hands reach out of his pussy, and they're like holding the elephant balls.
Starting point is 00:45:00 And then he's like rubbing its dick. And it like blows everywhere. And he goes, ha, hakuna Matata, my friend. And then he like pulls it out. And they go to get out. And it's like 10 more elephants come charging. And he goes, no, elephant bukkake party. And then it just like cuts.
Starting point is 00:45:17 But it is one of the funniest fucking movies. Oh, for what the fuck? I know what I'm talking about now. Not because of that scene. And like no one talked about it, but it has so many scenes like that that are so fucking funny and just so gross that I laughed
Starting point is 00:45:31 so hard at so much of it. Babylon does not compete with that. That's what it reminded me of. Every time I try to tell somebody about it, they're like, no, I've never heard of that. I don't think it did great. Is there anyone in it? It's a handful. His brother is famous too.
Starting point is 00:45:47 He's in Kingsman. He's Merlin. He's Merlin in Kingsman. Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah, there's a lot of people. He's a very famous. He's like.
Starting point is 00:45:55 Yeah. It's got a handful of famous people in it. But dude, it is such a fucking funny movie. And it's so gross. Like the whole time. Oh, I forgot about that movie. It's like partially filmed like Borat where it's like someone's falling with like the whole time. Oh, I forgot about that movie. But it's like partially filmed like Borat
Starting point is 00:46:05 where it's like somebody's falling with a camcorder and then it's like high def scenes and stuff like that. Like, you know, it's not like he's talking
Starting point is 00:46:11 directly to the camera or whatever. That's a fever dream. Oh, it's so fucking funny. Oh, it's so gross and so bad but it's really funny. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:46:19 That's how this one Babylon is it's the drug sex everything like that on a heightened scale. We need new cocaine. Where's the coke at? And then the guy walks in and he's like, here's this, this, this, this, this. I just watched a man crawl into an elephant vagina.
Starting point is 00:46:35 Yeah. Yeah. And then you open a door and there was a woman peeing on a fat guy. And then you open another door and then there's every gender going at each other. And it's all there for the eyes to see and it was the first five minutes i'm like here's your food babe and then it's just elephant shit and i was like i'm so sorry she can't watch during that i'm very weird about food i cannot watch certain stuff while i eat like super weird about it it is like a an ick of mine
Starting point is 00:47:01 like an ick oh an ick i can't like ick. Ooh. An ick. I can't. Like, I can't watch. This sounds really weird. I cannot watch things like Star Wars while I eat because there are certain characters, the way they're made, gross me out while I'm eating. Why do you have to bring up Ackbar like that? I'm very visual. I know it's Ackbar. You can just say it.
Starting point is 00:47:17 You say certain characters. It's Ackbar. I mean, it's any of the ones that aren't human. It just grosses me out. I don't know why. So now you're racist yeah wow just because we're not human this video's gonna haunt me in like 80 years when aliens are on the planet and they like enter
Starting point is 00:47:33 she's getting canceled even though she's dead no we're still alive because i've come out with technology by then. We're missing that. You know we're missing that. No, I know. It's a nice talk, though. That should extend your life. It's going to happen when we're in our 90s, which I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:47:53 But then it can reverse, hopefully. None of us are making it to 90. I might. You're not. We'll see. She won't even do aspartame. She's going to outlive me by a long time. No, see, that's why.
Starting point is 00:48:03 No, we made a pact, though. We're dying at the same time. What do we call that? A word we can't say on the internet. That's a Ryan Reynolds pact right there. Just kidding. We made a pact. I die in a car wreck tomorrow.
Starting point is 00:48:17 That's crazy. My ghost is like, what about that pact? Where's your pact at now? Oh, God, that's so silly. I didn't know it was tomorrow. I was going to make a cake tomorrow. I Just got like all the risk speed for this dude back I'm showing ghosty like showing the back you Like later Do it like later. Yeah, give me like a 5 p.m. I got some stuff to do. Let me make it a 50. I got some stuff to do between now and the next 30 years. You were my purpose.
Starting point is 00:48:51 You watched the episode. He's like, I was satisfied. Well, apparently your cake's your purpose now. I died and you're baking cake the next day. Oh, hey, can we talk about that for a second? Is that too much to talk about? That episode of Last of Us? Which one?
Starting point is 00:49:06 The third one? The one that came out before us? This one? Oh, yeah. Three? Three? We got all three. No, I've seen three.
Starting point is 00:49:10 We're all caught up. So what would you guys feel about it? I loved it. It was really good. It was a work of art. It was really, really good. She's crying. I'm already crying.
Starting point is 00:49:19 I really love that. That's just good TV. That was really good TV. I will say, I was looking really forward to seeing those scenes from the game i really no hate towards this episode because that was a really good episode of tv but i really did want to see a lot of the cool stuff that they did in the game like his fucking church hideout when joel gets lifted up by the fucking rope oh he has to and has to shoot everything upside down oh god i forgot yeah ell, Ellie's trying to help him down and he's like shooting
Starting point is 00:49:46 all the fucking clickers running at him upside down. That's when he gets the bow. So he starts doing cool bow shit. I was like, oh, that would have been fucking cool to see the whole arsenal inside the church. They load up and go to that fucking school where the military was at to get that battery. You didn't put that in the game, though.
Starting point is 00:50:00 Yeah, sure. Alright, it's alright. We need the battery. Joel runs across for 30 minutes, gets the battery, runs back. Yeah Yeah, but it would have been like really fucking cool them going to that school when that big-ass fucking monsters in there You have to fight it in the gym like it was like a lot of really cool stuff Cuz I'm here like being like oh fuck. Yeah. Oh, I hope this parts there. I hope this parts there and then I was Oh, okay. Yeah, I can see both sides of it. And then I was like, oh, is that okay? Yeah. I can see both sides of it. I was like, okay, this is really good and all. And this is very sad. First off, let's talk about the gay stuff.
Starting point is 00:50:34 Beautiful. Yeah. Actually, it was really good. Very sad. That made me want to be gay. That's the most beautiful love story I've ever seen on TV in a long fucking time Yeah, it was really really it was just good TV in general That was a really good episode of anything like you're saying Ron Swanson's wife is the one that got him for him
Starting point is 00:50:53 Yeah, yeah, he was the one that got Anna what's her name? Maybe she plays an anion something that I'm remembering in my head. But yeah, she's the one that got him the role. She read this film and was like, yo, you're doing this. You're doing this, bitch. Yeah. I want to watch it.
Starting point is 00:51:13 Got it. This is so good. That episode, it was. That is shit, dude. Dude. And it's Nick Offerman. Thank you. Yes, his name.
Starting point is 00:51:22 It was a, it was weird watching like the positive and the negative. I'm like, I don't think people understand. First off, he was gay in the game. He didn't know that. Oh my God. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:33 Yeah. It was like, it was pretty subtle stuff. Yeah. But like, yeah, obviously. Which they talk about the game.
Starting point is 00:51:38 That's in the new episode. They show the gay Maxine. Yeah. That doesn't, you've watched it. It's like, it's a cut for cut. It literally is like the, okay. It's like it's a cut for it literally is like
Starting point is 00:51:45 like you hit play they already did a breakdown it's like scene for scene and it's like his books that he had at his house and then um a lot of people when it was like i wanted to see the zombie fight and then all that it's like you have to show the um it's showing what the world went through because right now it doesn't show it too much you had just that 20 year period it's showing what the world went through because right now it doesn't show it too much you had just had a 20 year period it's like a boom jump cut yeah so it rolls over so you're in your head as a viewer you're just like oh okay it's fucked up now you're not understanding what humanity went through and that is what that break that that episode is really good at it's showing humanity how individuals change and you're showing a character's story arc
Starting point is 00:52:27 through those rough times. You're like, hey, this dude's isolated. He's all this shit. And then he finds this guy, and he's apprehensive. And then it shows like, hey, this story arc. Now, if you're complaining about holding the guns wrong and standing out in the open and shooting things without taking 100 hundred percent.
Starting point is 00:52:46 Agree with that. Yeah. That was kind of goofy, but like whatever. Yeah. Yeah. I was, but everything else was very well done on a story.
Starting point is 00:52:52 Fair, but I've seen fuds that would do that. I'm pretty sure the, the, what was the timeline? 2003, the world ended. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:02 Somewhere around there. So four years later, 2007 teacupping was a thing still yeah that was one argument and i saw it was like oh holy shit i didn't even think about that think of the timeline this used to be normal oh yeah oh wow and is that is the before the age of youtube so you're not gonna have a whole bunch of training videos how to train yeah he wasn't a trained like marksman he was a dude who he was was a prepper. He was a FUD prepper. Yeah.
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Starting point is 00:54:10 get one of the shotguns in the game? I think so. At least he would have got a shotgun. That would have been cool. The wall of AKs? Yeah, man. It was everything. I wished I was near the end of that episode. I was like, okay, so he's probably not going to kill himself, and then this is going to be when he gets really crazy, and that's what the next episode is going to be when they go, okay, he's probably not going to kill himself, and then this is going to be when he gets really crazy.
Starting point is 00:54:26 And that's what the next episode is going to be, when they go, and then he's crazy version of Bill. And that's, like, the game. That's cool. They did, like, a cool backstory, but then he just, like, is dead. And I was like, what? Damn it.
Starting point is 00:54:37 I was like, I was hoping, I was totally, like, the episode was great. I wished that they would have done more. I wish they would have. The Ellie meeting Bill. Yeah, yeah, lit that in yeah but didn't ellie hated bill right each other the whole time and then you know the same way that she is with everybody they kind of come around to each other at the end like they're kind of joking around at the end yeah
Starting point is 00:54:53 but uh yeah yeah i wish uh story pacing i can see why i'm sure they did it because of pacing it's literally like every episode is like a chapter of the game basically yeah yeah it's doing really good. Oh, I'm so happy. Hey, Ryan Reynolds, are you ready for the biggest Sunday in sports? Not talking to you, Big H. Not talking to you. Uncool.
Starting point is 00:55:15 Uncool. What's that, Ryan? Why, yes, it is. DraftKings Sportsbooks? I am talking about them, Ryan Reynolds. How did you know? An official sports betting partner of Super Bowl 57. Big H, I'm not talking to you.
Starting point is 00:55:30 Just hold off, bro, okay? You can talk about it later. It's right. It has all the action you need, and new customers can bet just $5 and instantly get 200 bets for free. High five, Ryan. Plus, all customers can get in on Super Bowl 57 excitement
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Starting point is 00:56:10 Well, I will be betting that the Chiefs will have seven points by the end of the first quarter and the Eagles will have 14. Boom. Download the new DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code unsub new customers can spend five dollars on super bowl 57 and get 200 for free instantly only a draft king sportsbook with code unsub got it minimum agent eligibility restrictions apply void in ohio see show notes for more details i am going to call this now what we are going to see in the next few years is an influx of video guys elyse calling something
Starting point is 00:56:50 yep video game developed films or shows but the main thing is is going to be studios be like hey let's just follow the storyline it's like marvel and marvel did iron man and all that because i was watching the backstory on that entire sequence of how Marvel took off in the way it did. And it was one dude that was actually a huge fan of Marvel. They made him the head producer. And he's like, or executive producer. And he's like, got it. Hey, guys, there's a script.
Starting point is 00:57:18 It was made 40 years ago. It's got pictures. Let's do this. Imagine sticking to the actual storyline and seeing success. It's crazy. Do you all see stuff where Henry Cavill will get so pissed off on set? No. Yeah, because he's like huge ultra nerd.
Starting point is 00:57:31 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so he's like big witcher. He loves all the books, loves all the games, plays them all regularly. And they were coming to him for advice on the show. Yeah, I remember this part. I forgot what scene it was. They were trying to do some whole scene. It was like nothing like any of it.
Starting point is 00:57:47 He's like, no. He's like, I'm not doing that. He's like, that's not in any of it. He's like, it makes no sense. He's like, we're not doing that. Oh, wow. And he was like, they were like threatening to fire him or whatever. And he's like, well, do it then.
Starting point is 00:57:55 He's like, I'm not going to make this like bullshit when it's like nothing like it. Really? Yeah. So it was like. That's cool. I love to hear that. I heard about that. I just didn't know.
Starting point is 00:58:03 It's just examples. They were like, so they like started just coming to him. Like every time they, they're like, so what do you think about this? And he'd be like, okay, well,
Starting point is 00:58:10 I want to do it like this. And they were like, all right, cool. Yeah. So they like kind of like let him like help direct it basically because he was such a big fan.
Starting point is 00:58:17 My boy. That's pretty fucking cool. And that's, you're going to see an influx now because of the success of Last of Us. Studio execs are going to be like, oh wait. Oh wait
Starting point is 00:58:29 Let's just follow this. Yeah, then we won't make halo again No, I will say wardrobe was dope and every wardrobe was dope they did so good with that Did you want some visuals are fucking awesome. And then immediately it was fucking wretched. You're like Master Chiefs is like, oh yeah. I'm going to take his helmet off because I need some pussy. And then he's sleeping and making things up. And then they chose the cop from The Orange is Black. No offense against him, but I just did not see him as Master Chief.
Starting point is 00:59:00 Sorry. I like him as an actor. No, but just not that role. I don't see masters I just didn't want to see his face period Why didn't take someone off? Mandalorian split fucking second dread So good and that's why like Sylvester Stallone's dread his thing in the conscious. I'm not wearing a fucking helmet
Starting point is 00:59:21 so that's why it's like 1% whereas Dread the movie New one. Yeah with the guys and the boys. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, well he was fucking name But you fucking butcher I was talking with an accent The one he always says I can't say that. Oh, yeah, that's a bad word funny. I watched a movie a couple nights Yeah, have you guys seen I mean? It's old. It's a cheese Yep But I watched a movie called Pete's dragon a couple nights ago if you guys seen that
Starting point is 01:00:03 And I just saw I haven't seen that I watched it and he kid's movie. It's a kid's movie. It's really good. And I just thought, oh, I haven't seen that. And I watched it and he's in it. And I was like, oh, what? There's like a million famous people in it, but I guess I should
Starting point is 01:00:10 have expected that. Pete's Dragon? Yeah, Pete's Dragon. It's like a children's book. Oh, Pete's Dragon. It's Disney, right? Huh? Is it Disney or Pixar?
Starting point is 01:00:16 I think it's Disney, yeah. The old one. Yeah, it's like 2016, I think is when it came out. The book is old as shit. It's like a children's book from like the 70s. Is it Pete the Magic Dragon?
Starting point is 01:00:26 Pete Puck. Damn it. No. Wait, what? Disney owns Pixar. Yeah, Disney does. But their intro is different. If it's a Pixar movie, it's a Pixar intro.
Starting point is 01:00:41 It's like a different team or whatever. That's all I'll say. It's just different in that. Because I'm... Pixar, there's a Pixar movie. It's a Pixar intro. It's like a different team or whatever. But yeah, okay. That's all I'll say. It was just differing that. Because I'm, yeah. Pixar, there's a little, there's a lamp intro. And Disney's the huge castle. Yeah. And it's in its own. The Pixar universe is separate.
Starting point is 01:00:55 Yeah. It's in its own self-contained universe. Yeah. Which all of them are in the same. Right? Yes. The pizza and the batteries and everything right this is where everyone leaves the podcast because boring as fuck right now
Starting point is 01:01:11 i want to talk about come back no baddies come batty what's your cum smell like? These are good questions. Let's smell it right now. Yeah, get it on the table. Sab, don't look at it. Batty, not on the mixer either. Before we left the house, we were talking about
Starting point is 01:01:39 that one subject. That one subject? The most embarrassing thing that ever happened. That you're willing embarrassing thing that ever happened. That you're willing to talk about. Nah. No, Barry, what is yours? Just one awkward moment involving one other human or maybe a group of people.
Starting point is 01:01:54 Yeah, Barry, what's yours? Barry, you have to have some. What's maybe your second favorite? One that you can talk about? Or third favorite? One that you would like to talk about? One that you're okay with discussing. Maybe one you've already talked about.
Starting point is 01:02:04 On the podcast that I want to talk about for the that you're okay with discussing. Maybe one you've already talked about. On the podcast that I want to talk about for the next seven months every day. Yeah. That's great. Which one, Batty?
Starting point is 01:02:13 Pull up a chair. Is it in the middle? Yes, it is. We're making crisscross applesauce. Yeah, guys,
Starting point is 01:02:20 let me just throw them on the, we drew the cans. Crisscross applesauce. Just a spotlight beams down on you. All the lights black out. It's just like dark in the back. Baddie starts shaking.
Starting point is 01:02:31 Sad music goes on. My uncle. Go on, Baddie. Gee, you guys have nice lighting in here. Baddie. Okay, Sam, start. Me? Why me? Don't make me start. You brought up the topic, Sam. Baddies. Okay, Sam, start. Me? Why me?
Starting point is 01:02:45 Don't make me start. Why? You brought up the topic, Sam. I thought it was a good topic. Because everyone has multiple. Okay, I have like 10 embarrassing stories. Maybe we don't know what the topic is about. I'm willing to tell like two.
Starting point is 01:02:54 Okay, tell the top one. Oh, yeah. This is fun, isn't it? This is real fun. Eli, go. My most embarrassing? It's your topic, you fuck. It can't involve me. It can't involve me. Yeah, weird. That's so weird. Tell my most embarrassing On the Christmas show when I poop myself
Starting point is 01:03:25 When he told me that we shit ourselves it's a. We shit ourselves. It's a thing. You shit your pants. You don't shit on yourself. The big... You're like, maybe you shit yourself. You don't wake up and your clothes are perfectly clean and you're covered in just shit and doo-doo. There's a big difference. Shit and doo-doo?
Starting point is 01:03:40 Yeah. The toilet paper had doo-doo on it. I don't even know how. Which means you just passed out midwife. He told me this on our fourth date too. That's how confident he was that I wouldn't run. It's not that embarrassing. Would you tell that on a fourth date?
Starting point is 01:03:58 No! Actually, that was our third date. I shouldn't have done that. I told her I had pooping problems before I moved. Pooping problems is different than I shit all over myself on the walls. I like to be open and honest. If you've got a problem, then they're like, sure. But it's not a problem.
Starting point is 01:04:14 No, it doesn't just happen. You don't just shit on the walls. Well, I didn't shit on the walls. I shit on the floor, everywhere else. It's just not in the toilet. That doesn't just happen. Well, it does, Matty. Otherwise, it wouldn't happen.
Starting point is 01:04:30 Apparently, it does happen. Because it happened. Yeah. I was blackout. I woke up on my toilet at like four in the morning, just sitting there. I wake up naked. I'm like, what happened? And there's poop on my hands. And the floor and on the toilet like on the tp i'm just everywhere
Starting point is 01:04:50 there's nothing worse than poop on your hands i look at my clothes they're perfect i'm like oh no what happened it's like on my legs i'm like my bed's ruined my bed so i have to like scoop So I had to, like, scoop the poop up on the floor. No! I put it away and clean up. I put it away! I didn't flush it. You put it away somewhere. I put it in the drawer. You put it in the drawer. I put it in the drawer.
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Starting point is 01:06:03 please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. I used the drawer to scoop it through. I'm like, lock it. What's in this locked drawer? I'll do it later. That's probably my most embarrassing story. That's a good one. It's not embarrassing. We're laughing
Starting point is 01:06:46 Because he's come to terms with it. You know a couple years This happened while you were alone, so it's not like it's only embarrassing for you to yourself. Yeah A lot of people and they walked in and you had shit all over you Like at a Denny's public bathroom their cameras like what is clothes you're folding that's a black mirror episode if i've ever heard one i don't know this isn't a super embarrassing he's just fighting somebody think of public embarrassment i remember being pissed drunk uh i remember being pissed right that's a weird thing to say but i got early 20s probably at a bar a real dive shithole up in vermont and i remember doing a bunch of shots because that's what I did I was stable
Starting point is 01:07:48 and I remember like I'm gonna vomit oh boy walked into the bathroom and there is a dude washing his hands and there's a dude pissing and the stall is locked so I go watch out and I just project like we're talking exorcist levels
Starting point is 01:08:04 of like cone spray like out of my mouth into the sink I was I was locked I was zoomed in on the sink. I like eye contact more because it's like this So it was like Dark and there was at least dark in there. No, no, it was bright. I'm sorry and me in this band He just like there's vomit on his hands. You got vomit on him? 100%. 100% got vomit.
Starting point is 01:08:50 I mean, I had vomit on me. He had vomit on him. And he washed his hands. Kid, that's how I met your mother. He washed his hands in the vomit sink. And he's just... I remember going, what the fuck, bro? And he just walked out.
Starting point is 01:09:06 I got you all now. And there's a dude pissing who just turns around me and like, nah. He walked out. The guy in the stall didn't leave the stall. And I had to wash my pukey hands in the pukey sink. And then I just walked out. I did more shots. Dude, hypothetically, that guy's name is Keith.
Starting point is 01:09:20 Keith is laying in bed scrolling on TikTok. And he finds you. He's like, it's the vomit guy from that. I hate that man. There you are, motherfucker. I'm trying to remember the name of the bar. And you'll forever be the vomit guy at home. It wasn't Reroz.
Starting point is 01:09:34 What was the name of the bar? Yeah, we do. Sputis. Rasputins. I don't know if you still live in Vermont. Go to Rasputins and puke in that sink. It was Sputis. We all called this Sputis. Go puke in that sink those beauties. We all called that beauty go puke in that
Starting point is 01:09:48 Hey you want to check out this don't bargain Twice a year to minors it was that bar. Oh, yeah, I used to be a balancer in a bar like that It was the bar you go down the stairs into the basement to The cellar but everybody called it it had a name that stuck forever called the slut dungeon yeah you were the gatekeeper i was a bouncer in like the back bar like i oh yeah that was because i was like the main dance floor big bar there in the back that was like more of a chill area and there's like the entrance to the bathrooms. There was two bars there.
Starting point is 01:10:27 Yeah. So I kind of hung out back there, watched the bars because like people would just steal shit. Like if a park owner wasn't there, they'd reach back and like steal whole bottles and shit. What the fuck? Oh, yeah. And I'd have to be like, hey, no, no. No, no, no. Mind on the finger.
Starting point is 01:10:39 Like I had to like walk into the bathroom area because it was just one entryway to the bathroom. Women were over here on the left. Men's was on the right. It was a little wall, but there was no actual divider. You could just look out and see dudes' dicks. Nice! My dream. The girls were all stalls, and then it was just a bunch of dudes.
Starting point is 01:10:58 But yeah, it was a fun time. That was the funnest year of a job I've ever had. That's awesome. Yeah, it was a lot of fun. Did you get some old shitty dive bars, man? Oh, God. It was funny because like, I mean, I'm not like, I'm like an average looking dude. But like because you're.
Starting point is 01:11:13 You're your own worst enemy. Don't even. But like because you work there, like girls are like, yes. Like they're like, oh, if I flirt with this guy, you know. We feel safe with bouncers. We do. I'll get free drinks. This guy will watch over me.
Starting point is 01:11:25 But it got to where there was a lot of foreign exchange groups. And there was so many hot girls in each one of them. There was one from UK. There was one from Australia. So many hot girls that would come. And they would be like, Caleb, my mate. And buy me shots and stuff. And I'd be like.
Starting point is 01:11:40 You got international pussy? No. But it was awesome. It was a lot of fun yeah but like I'd have to like it was like very cliche shit would happen
Starting point is 01:11:49 all the time they'd be like hot girls would go to the bathrooms they'd come out like they're like skin tight dressed in their high heels
Starting point is 01:11:54 and they'd always have like toilet paper trailing from their shoes and I'd be like oh wait wait wait and I'd like hold them
Starting point is 01:12:00 and I'd like step on it and like roll it back and like and sweep it to the side and they'd be like oh my god thank you like I'd like step on it and like roll it back and like and sweep it to the side and they'd be like they'd be like oh my god thank you like I just like saved their life you saved them from their embarrassing story and it happens it happened like multiple times a night every night oh man
Starting point is 01:12:18 come in like with their high heels just like paper trail them behind them and they'd be like let me let me buy you a shot let me get your number let me like just like like i just was the best dude in the world those you are you are the best in the world it was it was a lot of fun i got to like drag people out of there and like i never did like beat people up you never had to beat people up i didn't beat them up i would choke them out uh yeah that's called beating them up yeah because i'm not like so the other guys man there was a lot of guys there that were they worked there so they could beat the shit out of people. And they would like. Those are the good kind of people.
Starting point is 01:12:49 Dude. They're not. Don't be that guy. Please don't. All solid concrete floor, dude. And there'd be sometimes like. Kids would. Like drunk guys would be in an altercation.
Starting point is 01:12:56 And then like some of those bouncers would sneak up behind them. And fucking suplex them, dude. Like just be like. Boop. Bam. Head right into the concrete. Like not trying to like. De-escalate it. That's how you kill somebody. That's how you kill people, dude. Just be like, boop, bam, head right into the concrete. Not trying to de-escalate it.
Starting point is 01:13:07 That's how you kill somebody. That's how you kill people, dude. And a lot of those guys got fired. A lot of major problems happened because of that. Because one guy was the governor's son. He came in and he was underage. And that bar's name changed all the time. Same reason. Yeah, exactly. Because it was the it was the only bar up there.
Starting point is 01:13:28 The 18 and up bars. Yeah. I forgot those exist. Yep. So it was always an issue, dude. But I had like a lot of the main, get your wristband or your check mark on your hand. You, they, they draw the X if you could drink or the, or the X if you couldn't drink. Sorry.
Starting point is 01:13:42 That's usually what it was. It was a lot of fun. I never liked people like, yeah, a lot of those other bouncers did they would be they'd be going for knockouts like they would like sneak up behind someone like boom boom like just like beating the fuck out people and i'm like oh my god but if i ever had like issues i would just like walk if they wouldn't like should i be like hey man's like we gotta go and they'd be like no no fight me or something i would like just twist them around like and lift them up and like just drag them out and if they like passed out i would sit them down and yeah i would just twist them around and lift them up and just drag them out. And if they passed out, I would sit them down.
Starting point is 01:14:06 I would just sit them down next to the wall. Watch them piss themselves. Be like, all right, you're good. Don't be a violent piece of shit. Yeah. No one wants to hang out with you if you drink and get violent. Real fast, no, no. Like drink and piss yourself or something funny.
Starting point is 01:14:24 Yeah, sure. It was a fun time it was a fun job got it was like exciting every night yeah i could not do imagine doing that at your age now but oh now for sure that was like i mean they're still like a lot of those guys that were there they were like managers whatever they were my age now yeah they were like dudes who like just their life was they went to college until they were 35 and they worked in these bars until they eventually like became owners or like, you know, whatever of the bar. But like they were all, most of them were like pretty chill, pretty cool guys.
Starting point is 01:14:53 It was fun though, dude. Always something like crazy going on. Like literally people would just get like completely naked in there. And it was like, yeah, it was wild. At the bar? Yeah. It was like a club. It was like more of like a club people get naked at a club
Starting point is 01:15:08 When you're like a fucking 18 year old and you get like fucking wasted that was like on their birthdays, dude They would get so trashed and they would just get like fucking naked because they had like stripper poles and shit in there and like They would be did it was gnarly there'd be plenty times like other bouncers were coming like dude He's like I'll sit back here for a second and go do a lap around the bar. I'm like, okay. I go, and then it'd always be something, like, there was either somebody was naked, somebody was fucking in the corner, somebody, like, was, like, biting, like, it was just, like, crazy shit always.
Starting point is 01:15:37 What state was this in? West Virginia. I'm moving to West Virginia. This was in Morgantown, so, like, it was, like, the number one party school for, like, six years. So, yeah, and that was, like, the only 18 and up bar in Morgantown, so it was like the number one party school for like six years. So, yeah, and that was like the only 18 and up bar in Morgantown. So it was like always fucking like. Those family reunions got crazy.
Starting point is 01:15:54 They did 25 cent pitchers of beer. Oh my. Yeah, dude. Yeah. I remember Pete doing Pete. They did dollar mixed drinks. The paper pitchers? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:16:04 Dollar mixed drink, 25 cent pitchers for like the first two hours. It was stuff like that like all the time. Damn. And it would be like, all right, we need you to work tonight because it's, you know, sink or swim or whatever we call it on Wednesdays. And it was like two hours of this 25 cent fucking gallon of beer basically. What the fuck? So like the floors were always completely by the end of the night and stuff yeah i've never experienced any of that really i never like i only went out
Starting point is 01:16:30 to that stuff like every now and then with like my roommates and stuff but i like worked it so i'm jealous was there working and it was like a different way to see it but it was like it was fun because i wasn't like i was like i was just like, watching people be idiots. I was one of the idiots. That was me. Dude, you put a $10 cover, because we had 10 cent Tuesdays at Neon Cactus, and it was 10 cents for a pitcher. Yeah. And people would get fucking pissed. We'd each buy our own pitcher, and we'd be just like, drink.
Starting point is 01:16:59 That's what they do, man. They would be walking around the whole bar, like, oh, excuse me, their big pitcher of beer, just drinking out of it and stuff. And then the bar is like, how does this happen? Oh, this is such a mess. And you're like, you did this. This is your fault. You've never experienced this shit.
Starting point is 01:17:17 You need to go to it sometime. You guys can like grind on each other. That'd be so cool. Just go get like trash. Pretend like you're like going out on like a day like my like I do have an exciting night is cooking like tacos and then watching We had a place called oh it was world something I don't fucking remember doesn't matter tacos Tecate's and tequila shots $2. Oh, that's that was just every week we do that lunch break
Starting point is 01:17:45 oh man yeah dude i forgot all those are baby i don't know i'm not gonna yeah i'm not taking you i'm fucking old i'd be in hell that is my hell if i woke up i would think i was dead there's nothing like a hangover from fucking bud light and PBR Let me tell you what That's a rite of passage I feel like everyone needs to experience that So you know that you don't want to do it Because it's like if you've never done it Just like people that idolize the military If you've never been in you're like oh I wish I had joined
Starting point is 01:18:17 Versus if you just did your four years right out of high school Then you know But I was homeschooled from elementary to high school And then got married early So it's just You dumb bitch It's stupid You fucking
Starting point is 01:18:29 Trust me that's dumb You don't want to do any of that I remember one time Like my friend That would try to get me To go out on the nights That I was off There's always one of those bro
Starting point is 01:18:38 He would just We're downtown dude You coming down No man No So you guys are gonna do this You guys are gonna Like find a bar local Let that go to Austin fuck it
Starting point is 01:18:50 Like if we all win it, I would that would be that would be more fun cuz it would be like more chill Instead of just one be chill Safe yes, chill no. Yeah, we're safe because you're not gonna just die. Eli's not having fun, he doesn't like this idea. He's like, I'm not gonna do this. It was like, you remember Dallas? You remember the old lady that was trying to, with her boyfriend? I was just walking back. Oh yeah. But it was fun.
Starting point is 01:19:14 See? I guess. It was old lady shit. And then I can't take that and I was like. We both kept getting picked up by other people. And I'd be like, oh, we're with somebody. I was like, you and your friend are having a good time. Oh, he's just your boyfriend.
Starting point is 01:19:27 She was like, you are so cute. Eli was like, oh, God. I was like, oh, your boyfriend and you, this is just a friend. And I was like, and that dude was not having a good time. And I'm just like, what? We walked away and us two started arguing.
Starting point is 01:19:42 What are you saying? We've been together for six years, what the fuck? We're just friends us two started arguing. What are you saying? That is actually fucking amazing. We've been together for six years, what the fuck? Yeah, we're just friends. We live together! We got engaged last week. He makes out pictures that you haven't seen in a while. What are their names?
Starting point is 01:19:54 They have seven kids. What are their names? They have seven kids. What are their names? He's just like, I met you and I was like, what? We have seven kids, you bitch. You dumb bitch. Seven babies. We have seven kids, you bitch. You dumb bitch. You dumb bitch.
Starting point is 01:20:06 These are fun. Everyone just like. That's what we did. I'll take one shot, please. He's a friend. Yeah, just. Did you see that? I didn't like him.
Starting point is 01:20:21 I didn't like him. That was so hard to watch. Dude, that dude's reaction. I was like. And you're like. They started fighting me to watch. Dude, that dude's reaction. I was like, and you're like, oh, they started fighting me. He turns around, there's just one tear. Oh, God. Just the friend, he's like, I'm her friend.
Starting point is 01:20:32 I'm her friend. The ultimate wingman, your husband. Weird, you guys have the same last name. Be chill, babe. I'm trying to get laid tonight. Yeah, be chill, babe. I'm trying to get laid. What, be chill babe I'm trying to get laid What?
Starting point is 01:20:48 Oh, boy that was my job I'm right here Look at him though Oh, look at you Now look at you You shut the fuck up You're being such a buzz kid Stop being a cock block babe
Starting point is 01:21:04 Stop being a cock block, babe. Stop being a cock block, babe. That is a shirt, right? This is why we don't go out. Oh, God. This is why we stay home and make tacos. Fuck off. I get it, Sam.
Starting point is 01:21:18 I get it. Dude, just fucking look at him. He walked away because of you. Yeah, he walked away because of you. Fuck, you just smell needy, bitch. Savvy, are you sure you missed this? I've never experienced it. Good.
Starting point is 01:21:34 You can. Well, I don't experience the single part. Just the partying. The college part? I didn't go to college either, but I got banned from college. I did one semester online. That could possibly be my most embarrassing story. I got banned from a college campus I didn't go to college either, but I got banned from colleges. I did one semester online. That could possibly be my most embarrassing story. What? I got banned from a college campus I didn't go to.
Starting point is 01:21:50 And then I got a permission slip to drink when I was underage. That makes you look cooler. You got banned from a college campus. I'm pretty sure laying on the floor vomiting everywhere constantly. Oh, you're vomiting again. Yeah, that's a common trend. I'm a puker. People, that becomes a cool story to most people.
Starting point is 01:22:09 Yeah. That guy's crazy. It was funny for a while. He got banned from hereuker people that becomes a cool story Kind of cool. Yeah kids Because my dick From a school me too which school I was a college I drunk I was an elementary school jerking off to the playground. We are not the same people. We are not the same! I don't wanna hang out with you mister. What? Bro, bro, bro. Bam, dude, come on back. Look at me. Kano meets pot. No, no. No, no, there's no Kano meets pot.
Starting point is 01:22:53 No, no, no. Bro, we're the same guy. We're the same guy. We're the same guy. Let's hang out, bro. Hey, you jailed kids, bro. No, no, dude. No, no, no.
Starting point is 01:23:03 I just drink a little bit. You like little boys, dude. This is dude. No, no, no. I just drink a little bit. You like little boys, dude. As I said, same. So much I like to drink. Yeah, I like to drink, too. My little boys. Well, I don't anymore. I fucking hate drinking.
Starting point is 01:23:17 I just said it. You know what's crazy? This muffles my ears. It's still so fucking loud. We're loud. This podcast is loud. Sounds like dear God. If you're watching this episode at work,
Starting point is 01:23:30 I'm the amount of comments. I just keep hearing cum and little boys in both of my ears. Don't put those words together, babe. Y'all did. No, I said J.O. I never talk about making cum. The amount of people that tell me that I'm a mess. Make him cum, baby.
Starting point is 01:23:41 I'm not old enough to cum yet. Oh, no. I never realized how much flog edits out of the podcast until I filmed a video with him and he started talking about someone that was asking our age difference and they referenced 30 to 40 years and he was like I don't know any 8 year old boys like what was it
Starting point is 01:23:57 with ropes of cum and I was like you can't say that so we don't film together anymore. Yes, we will. I know. And then he's editing it out. Don't. Sav, don't.
Starting point is 01:24:09 Run. We're not the same. You know my favorite word when we met was gosh darn it. I never cursed. She did not curse. I grew up religious. It's hard coming out of that. I went to Catholic school for a little bit.
Starting point is 01:24:24 I mean, I grew up like. Catholic guys are always dirty. Church like twice a week until I was like 13. It's hard coming out of that Guys are always dirty like always until I was like 13 Hey, what I was like I grew up in church like why so oh, yeah Yep, did you turn the picture around? I used to Manning Why Jesus just Invite me over we could was better and he just has a picture of his kid on his thing. And I was like, I was like, no, you spun the kid photo.
Starting point is 01:25:11 You can't do that. I'm not going to show you respect for the person I have met today. It's out of respect. Out of respect. Out of respect. You turn the photo out of respect. Out of respect. Out of respect. You turned the photo. Out of respect. You want your family, like you have that family photo, and they're all like this.
Starting point is 01:25:30 Do you want them watching you like that? I make eye contact with the photo. Thank you for watching the Instagram podcast. As always, we have Eli, DoubleTap, myself, Maddie, and our two amazing, wonderful, beautiful, hot, sexy, powerful guests, Savvy Summer and Caleb Francis. Savvy, where can we find you? Everywhere. In your room. What? On your roof.
Starting point is 01:25:52 Oh my God. In your basement. I don't know my camera to look at. Why are you there? I'm always there. She's Savvy Summer. Figure the fuck out. Caleb, where? Everywhere, Caleb W. Francis, Twitch is Grizzly Puncher.
Starting point is 01:26:02 Grizzly Puncher. That's the best. That's the best. Oh, thank you for watching. Oh, Twitch is Grizzly Puncher. Grizzly Puncher. That's the best. Thank you for watching. Oh, stay tuned to the episode. After. Stay tuned for the up the app. Coming, coming pussy.
Starting point is 01:26:13 You know the one. The dirty one. The after party. Now we get dirty. Yeah, now we talk. Head over to the Patreon if you want to watch the after party. Good luck. Watch Savannah squirt. We're all going to squirt. Thank you. like you're actually at the casino. The excitement doesn't stop there. With over 3,000 games to choose from,
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