Unsubscribe Podcast - Klarna Is Ruining Lives & The Army Is BACK! | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 231

Episode Date: September 23, 2025

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or go to explorevolvo.com. How are the boy's going to relax if they can't send each other picks from strangers on the internet? Everybody knows that big Goliath black guy with the dong. It's almost the only thing you could look at and be like, wow, I wish that was Medusa, actually. Did you know that Tony Mones when he wipes? He won't even address the allegations. Tony's intern. Oh!

Say hi to Eli. He's racially ambiguous. Brandon. His hair is fabulous. Don't I? A dark joke disposition. There's a fat electrician. Welcome to unsubscribe.

Hey, what's up, everyone? First off, you all are doing fucking amazing on the fitness challenge. Keep up the awesome work. Without going too much in detail, been really busy, really, really busy. And then complete transparency did get hit with a very heavy bout of depression. and I will say y'all really did help just seeing that positivity on the Reddit and helping and lifting each other up. I just want to, I truly, truly, truly want to say thank you for that because even during those lows and pushing through it and try to find that positive light, I didn't have to go far and I just got to see y'all being amazing, even during these very trying and not so happy. couple of last weeks. So, with everything that's going on in the world, with just everything.

So I just wanted to thank each and every one of you for being that ray of hope and that light at the end of the tunnel. I, it's awesome to see. And also, the tickets are almost sold out. So if you haven't picked them up yet, go grab them, go swag them. And then definitely the San Antonio show, we did, we made that way, way bigger, like way, way bigger, as we said. And we want that thing filled out. That is now our biggest. some show. So come hang out, have a good time, drink probably a little too much, and just be part of that community because I cannot stress how freaking fun it is. Plus, we're doing some cool things during the show and interactions. Appreciate y'all. Go check out their tickets. I don't know. Finn,

show them where they can get them. Unsubbcru.com slash live shows. Come hang out. Have a good time. Can't wait to see you all. And thank you again from the bottom of all our hearts out. So for everything. We love y'all. Cheers. Today's unsubscribe episode is brought to you by booking.com. Booking dot, yeah. It's in the read. From vacation rentals to hotels across the U.S., booking.com has the ideal stay for anyone. Even those who might seem impossible to please.

Whether you're booking for yourself, your partner, your sleep, light, rise early mom, or your high-maintenance group chat. You can find exactly what you're booking for at booking.com. Okay, ready? Three, two, one. I just saved a podcast, no problem. It's not bad.

What is it? Tequila smashed. It's tequila and soda water instead of a normal white claw, which is malt liquor. Yeah. I was just thinking that did taste pretty good. Man, that has no shirt. I've been telling you guys to do it with noons, but you're like all, I don't know, naysayers.

Hey, they're actually going to sponsor us. Who's that? really really yeah the tech i didn't know that was going through i've been shooting them for free for years well that sounds bad okay now it's yeah they actually asked us what's about damn time i know finally after getting into the what a fantastic beverage all it took was sidney to put out her quote unquote nazi ad and they're like oh being edgy's sell stuff who knew fat light tints were so bad

Is my right? Welcome back to the unsubscribe podcast. I am joined today by Eli Double Tap, Rich Angry Cops, myself Brandon Herrera, and Nick the Fat Electrician. What's all, bitches? We're here again. Marketing is finally rediscovering sex sells.

It's fantastic. Who would have thought the hot blonde in jeans with G-tits would have been like, wow, a lot of eyes on that? No, give me Dylan Mulvaney. Yeah, I want stringy trans balls. You think he's still got his nuts, or is it just sausage and no beans? I try to spend very little time thinking about it. I constantly think about what's going between his legs.

At least that's what Twitter says. Pillar and no stones. Do you guys see the New York Post had like this article kind of go viral where it's like this girl? Now all I could think of my head is Rich pulling him over. I need it for my police report. Pull it out. Get out of the car. Just for anchors or a side of beans too.

I'm going to have to pat you down. It's like an empty wallet. I'm so sad now. You think when I get like up and under in there to like pat him down, he's just cough. I'm a lady, sir. It's ma'am. It's ma'am.

Yeah, the New York Post did this article. It kind of went viral. And it's this Instagram hottie, quote, unquote, that's like, I, go and date on dates with other dudes that are already married or dating somebody because the girl sets it up to see if they'll cheat on them. And then I looked at it and I was like, these are very, very good airbrushed, like perfect makeup photos. Who is this person? And it took me 30 seconds to be like, this chick's got a dick folded underneath her fucking sniz. And it was a trans person with like huge fake tits. And, um,

yeah so guys are being tricked by a dude and their girlfriend yeah like you two are dating obviously you're the man and for sure you're like oh my god richard so much trans richard you need to like ask him on a date and see if he goes and if he cheats on me and you're like hey there's this hot broad who's actually a dude and you're like let me fuck up my life in two ways not only my ruining my relationship but you're gay now i feel like i mean he's just trying to figure dating him yeah don't don't be judgmentally like i feel like they're just trying to figure out if their husband's gay did the women know i think so how do you not know i don't when i looked at like the photos on this person's instagram that weren't like the perfect

photo shot and like album things i was just like that's dude what like the first thing that's it off too like you know when people get like uh like porn shows get like implants and They're too big for the skin that they have. So it's just like, hey, here's a normal chest. Perfect circle, you know? And, you know, it's like Arnold, like, flexing. You can see, like, the striations from the plastic tit. Like, pulling on the serial number.

Yeah. You're like, oh, the Johnson and Johnson? Very nice. Yeah, it was kind of like that for implants on this fella. And you're like, so that was the first thing it threw me off. And I was like, wait a second. And then I saw the bikini bottom half. And I was like, you've got your dick taped into your butthole.

I've seen that before. How much time did you spend on this? It only spent like five minutes. I'm a good investigator. Detective Richard High is on the job. Nuts to butts. I'll find those dudes. I just thought of the stonks guy, detective.

Detect. It's just detect. With the Sherlock Holmes ad on. Somebody make that. Oh, man. Man. you guys weren't here since Brandon announced that's what I was like the first topic was like oh they're gonna yeah sure let's follow up that exact conversation speaking of trans Tony

see he did it oh boy oh just watching the the Charlie bully again has been very funny but it's like look I try to keep things professional right like I've only ever attacked on policy now my friends we're tired I can't speak for anybody else I can't say it's not funny, though. The group chat. Fucking Frodo Baggins over here. I'm just trying to get the ring to the volcano. It's just us murdering orcs in the background the entire time.

As we said, the group chat is like, can I do it? Can I do it? Brand is like, hold. Hold. Nick's losing one. It's killing. Sorry. That did happen.

No, hold. I said fucking hold. That did happen the night before my announcement, because you all knew this was happening. And I'm just, I've had it in my calendar. for months. I text because you change the date. I literally had it in my calendar. Green light Tony Gonzalez in my fucking calendar. And I text you, are we good now? And he's like, no, I changed the date. I'm like, so I get a text from this guy. I'm at the hotel, right? Like, I'm just like sorting all my shit together. I'm like, oh, fucking big day tomorrow. I got to do this, this,

this, this. We got to film all the stuff and, you know, do the thing. And I'm laying in bed in the hotel room and I get a text from Nick. That it's just a screenshot of the tweet you want to send. which what was it again I don't remember it was the eye of Sauron oh it was the eye looking at the cave and it just said soon

like the night before he was supposed to announce and I was just like that he's like can I can I say it now I'm like go for it just just fucking do it I'm like oh you look at Mexican today in that light

oh yeah I'm looking Mexican today in my life I'm having fun okay leave me alone that poor man i always feel i don't feel bad but i would feel bad because like you know again you know nothing personal i would feel bad if he didn't go out of his way to purposely slander me like to say things that i know that he knows in his heart of hearts are not true but it's going to make me sound bad and like try to defame my name again where i live yeah like these are he's trying to get people to hate me in the town that you know i call home and uh

That's why I don't feel bad. The event was a shitty move. It's like, okay, let's take this out of context. From a cop standpoint, I'm used to seeing Brown on Brown crime. So, you know, I just kind of waited for it to eventually happen. And then there it was, rearing its ugly head. That was some of my favorite parts of the last campaign was just very funny. Like, there was one political action committee or something that was basically for the advancement of Hispanics and leadership, like in leadership roles.

Yep. And they were taking Tony, Tony's side. to get Herrera away. Like, this feels like a little collateral, don't you think? We like this Mexican better. For one, to have an entire political action committee based on, like, race is bizarre, I think. You're trying to help him, Rich, not the other way around.

A vote for Tony. No, mind. Remember last time we did this? Damn. That's why I said a vote for Tony. I can't bring back a vote for Brandon because it didn't work last time. I take most of that on my shoulders.

The loss really was my fault. I could have done better. Where do we go from here? Oh, I know. Rich got in trouble. I got in trouble again. Yeah, we had to save that. Shocking.

Yeah. You got in trouble? Yes. Weird when you just said, I'm used to brown-on-brown violence as a cop. Statistically, I am used to it. But yes, you got in trouble. I didn't say I supported it.

yeah i got in trouble i got an army trouble not police trouble no i got an army trouble um i said uh in the kind of consensual podcast i said a story where how i got kicked off the trail last year for being a drill sergeant because i made corrective training for the female soldiers and oh the same ordeal yeah so it's it's come back again so i that got closed out they were like yeah Drill Sergeant Hines, a drill sergeant. Yeah, he did corrective action. No fault, no waste in trouble. Carry on.

It's like OJ, he's like, I'm free, yes. How I didn't do it. How I would have done it. But they got me. The glove fit. What was it? If I did it, I think it was what I did. This is my lucky stabbing hat.

I can't throw away my stammer hat. I just love killing me. yeah the army uh the army cleared me of everything and said yeah you're good to go whatever no problems and then i talked about it on the kind of consensual podcast and then somebody in the army was just like i got a problem with him talking about it and now i have a commander's inquiry fucking seriously yeah because i said uh soldiers names that were in it so there the premise of it is i guess of this investigation is that drill sergeant me said private snuffy Or when I was reading questions from the investigation of, did you ask private snuffy to shut the fuck up?

I said private snuffy. So they're upset about that. And I'm like, these are questions that you asked me in an investigation. Like, I don't know if they're foyerable, you know, but like I can't repeat the questions that were asked of me in an investigation. And it's not first, last name, any of that. It was just private. It was private so and so. Which is a fucking very general name.

Well, except for one of them's was pretty unique. Yes. But then again, so is drill sergeant high, a fairly unique name. So, yeah, somebody got butt hurt and made a complaint. And then my commander was just like, drill sergeant high, I'm like, sir, why are you calling me? That's never a good sign. Usually I know I'm like, I'm calling you about something and then you call me back. That's usually the way that it goes when it's good.

It's not good when I just get a phone call unexpectedly from my battalion commander to be like, Joe Sargent, hi. I'm like, fuck. Good afternoon, sir. How can I help you? He's like, hey, I got to do an investigation on you. I'm like, you got to, it's funny because I have a good professional working relationship with the people in my unit. So literally, rich instinctively goes, I did it.

Which one? If I did it. My first words out on my mouth to my battalion commander where, fuck. What did I do now? How bad is it? Is it really bad or is it just like, whatever? He's just like, they're upset that you said the names of the privates that were a part of this investigation.

What I just explained, you know, did private so-and-so, did you say this to private so-and-so? Or did you not say this to private so-and-so? And you said private so-and-so's name. And I was like, you've got to be fucking kidding me. So that's where it's at. I don't expect it to really go anywhere because there was no, like, malicious intent. But at the same time, like, if these people, these troops, like, go to their units and their NCOs are like, hey, maybe we don't bitch about being yelled at in basic training because this unit is the real army and we're going to say words to you.

And maybe it could be a learning experience, sure. Imagine being that sensitive in Pete Hegseth's army. Really? It wasn't Pete Higgs' army back then. It was five his army. But I mean now, like to advance that now. I'm very excited. I'm very excited.

He just yelled at somebody doing PT the other day. It went on, it's on Twitter. He's like in this shacked black NCO's faces. He's doing push-ups. He's like, get up,

let's go, Sergeant. And I'm just like, it's coming back. Bring back Shark attacks. I did a video on it. Last week's video or the week before's video where, we're going to war.

The basic rules. We're going to war. Yeah, the basic rules have changed. I was actually going to ask about that one because it's like, okay, It's completely shifted. I was at the airport the other day. A group of troops were ready to go to basic training and Benning,

and they came up to me and they're like, oh, da-da-da-da. But I said, oh, well, the shark attacks are really quick. And they're like, I don't think they do those anymore. Guess again. That's what I said. I was like, ah, who'd you hear that from? Our recruiters, ha, ha, you're going to Binning. You're all infantry?

No, I'm a... There was, like, columns, guys, there's random people. I was like, ha! You got fucked, homie. history is repeating we're about to have a massive economic recession the gosses are back

basic training's hard again we're going to war nature's healing it's going to happen we're going to war all because we couldn't find a different island to make microchips on it's not going to be a housing bubble either we could start making microchips but they're so damn expensive when they're made in the United States

I'm not smart enough to know how to combat economics when it comes to a national slash global scale if like little Asian people are making these things that are really cheap that we need, but we try to make them and we can't compete because they've got time in your hands. I don't know what to do. I'm not sure that that's it. Look how small they are. I said I'm not an ecologist. I don't know economies. The amount of Americans that have died trying to make Asians get along is too high. Oh, they're the most racist people

ever. Let me open a book on the 20th century. Yeah, Asians hate each other. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Very much so. So what are the new rules with basic? Well, there's no new rules yet. It's just that Sectorf Pete Hagseth has come out and said, we want the Shuck Attack to come back. There was a memo that came out at Benning where it said no tossing the bays. Tossing a bays basically you go back into your barracks bay.

You can't toss bays anymore? The video's brought to you by prize picks. That's right. Prize Picks. What's prize picks? What's cut to Brandon? I don't know. Somebody tell me what prize picks is.

You and I make decisions every day, but with prize picks, the right decision can get you paid. Really? I make a lot of wrong decisions. Well, but being right can get you paid. In that case, once again, communists will starve. Don't miss any of the excitement this season with prize picks, where it's good to be right.

Unlike you, Brandon, wrong. Discussion in football through a personal experience. Who's following football this season? I don't watch sports. Yeah, I thought so. Okay, and Nick. My wife makes me watch d'I. Sorry, hold on.

I like to I can't say what I like to leverage and risk monetary currency in an economic fashion on the professional women's league of basketball Price picks invented the flex play which means you can still cash out even if all your picks didn't work out

You can double your money Even if one of your picks doesn't hit Download the app today and use code unsub That's code unsub to get $50 in lineups after you spend your first $5. Price picks, it's good to be right So hold on. Oh, I'll give you the full story. So a brigade commander

makes a memo and puts it out and it says drill sergeants are no longer going to be tossing bays in infantry osin this is not like but what is tossing bays tossing bays is when you go away for the day and the drill sergeants go in the barracks and they see if you fucked it up like hey did they take out the trash did they make their beds appropriate are their laundry bags like bloated and filled with dirty clothes or did they do laundry last night like they're supposed to and you know put them up in their bay and also make sure that their wall lockers are locked yeah right and if they're not hiding shit you Yeah.

And when they go through that barracks inspection without the troops present, if there's a bunch of crap that's wrong and they're tired of it, we will make that bay look like a tornado hit it. And one of my favorite things that I, yeah, like you will flip, you will flip bunks over. I was, because I'm an engineer, I would tie knots in their boots to connect the boots and I would have clothes lines of boots going across the bay. Because I'm an engineer. I went to school for this That's all you got that was your takeaway Six years of school and I can tie boots together Shit everyone slips through

A fuck wrong knot I had a guy that was going through He was preparing for Sapper School And you have to know all these different knots and what they're for And how to like talk yourself through them And so he was teaching me Because he was preparing himself for Zapper School And he was going through all the different knots

And reteaching them to me And I would do them as he would explain it to me And if it wasn't the right way, I would intentionally do what he said and fuck up the knot, right? But then eventually I just got really good at all these different knots. And one day, I was like, oh, let's make a clothesline with the boots. You know, like, we just started tying boots together. And then they got long enough to where you can make a clothes line. And then I was like, what if we just did it?

Like back and forth, back and forth throughout the whole bay. He's like, we can do that. And so we did. God, if you live stream just drills aren't side of stuff? Because all the privates are out during this. And then it cuts to you guys. Like, oh, my God. I got the greatest ideal jurors aren't.

And then you have chat getting super hyped for when the privates get back to their bay to see that reaction. You could don't know for more fucked up stuff. I'm just saying there's a lot of money in that. Yeah, the Army's really missing out on privatizing some of its streaming services. I love it. So this memo comes out from this if it only there was more private money involved in the DOD. Yeah, we need more private money involved in the non-existent military industrial complex.

Oh, yeah, the one that doesn't exist. No one that doesn't exist. You know how much money McDonald's makes? Do you know how many tiny hands it takes to make a microchip? Nancy Pelosi does. She does. She's very good. I follow her trades.

I'm doing okay. I guarantee it. Better than the S&P. Yeah. Weird. So you tied these knots. Oh, so that was, that's like barracks tossing. So this infantry OSIT brigade commander, a massive amount of troops that are going through

this basic training. this commander puts on a memo and says no more tossing the bays it degrades like good discipline and the relationship between a drill sergeant they're a troop's first leader when they come into the army there should be a relationship right there should be a relationship no it's a trainer that's specifically against the rules people you're mythical fucking terrorists that hurt me and i'm just trying to survive that's how you're supposed to feel i see you specifically against the rules to have any sort of relationship yeah you're not supposed to like You should not be buddies with the soldiers that you're training for multiple reasons.

I do not like trainees. They're gross. They're disgusting. I do not like them at all. The only thing I do is I train them to not be trainees anymore and I make sure they don't die because I'll get in trouble if they die. So they can't die. Otherwise, I'll get in trouble. And then they also have to not suck.

Otherwise, I'll get in trouble. So it's this equal balance of don't suck, but also don't kill them while they suck because they need to stay alive. So it's a nice balance. Like a baby. Yeah. If you could shake a baby, you can shake a trainee. Angry cops, 2026. Vote for me.

A vote for shaking trainees is to vote for angry cops. Drill Sergeant of the Army. Come on, Sergeant Major. You might have shot it down, but it sounds pretty good now. Weimer's like, hey, hey, hey, I'll comment below. He's obviously watching this episode. He's on the phone. He's like, boom, boom, boom.

Pete, this fucking idiot's got a good idea. he really seems to know what he's talking about. I thought he was a jokester at first, but now it kind of has a ring to it. What did he say in my kicking his legs up on this commands, Hart Major's basket, bringing Pete down the hall.

What did he say in that fucking episode? They can't all be good ideas. He sure do you have a lot of ideas. Like, well, they can't all be good ideas. It was a great moment. So that commander made that dumb rule. Don't toss the barracks.

And within a week, it had blown up on the internet. internet, especially because it was an infantry brigade commander for infantry Osset. And everybody saw it, thankfully, lost their minds, said, what the hell is this? Everybody gets their base tossed. There was a guy on Twitter. I forget his name. I mentioned him in the, it's like the Buddy Christ, but it's like Buddy CSM.

And he said, like, tell me your favorite stories about you getting fucked up in basic training and the incredible crazy shit that your drill sergeant made you do. And everybody talked about how much they loved it and how great it was and this great experience. And what that brigade commander was doing with that Mel is he's taking away the opportunity for us to give people these rights of passage

to say that they're a soldier and to connect with the people around them in this community, right? You're taking that away. It's that type two fun kind of thing where it's like, oh yeah, no, it sucked in the moment. But like everybody bonds over it and like you look back 10 years later. Like that was a great question.

Even in the moment when it's sucking, you kind of look at each other like, there's nothing better than the person next to you leaving their wall locker unlocked and all their shit is fucking everywhere and you're like ha especially with the shitbird especially when it's like a shitty dude you're like mm justice but you don't say it

can't smile or anything you're like afterwards I'm gonna make fun of this yeah because if I catch you smiling oh you don't like you like your buddy stuff getting thrown around huh oh you like watching your buddy get fucked up but not you Beat your face, Quavis. Beat your face. You know? Exactly.

So within that week, there was such a big pushback. And the rumor is, I forget where I saw it. So I can't say it's 100% verified. But the rumor was that Pete Hengseth made a call down to that brigade commander who put out the memo and said, or the guy that was above that brigade commander and said, stop the shit. It's infantry, basic, oh, sit. They're going to go.

get their base tossed. And immediately there was a rescinding order for that memo within a week. It was, as, you know, regarding previous memo number 419, memo rescinded, see Command Sergeant Major so-and-so. And you know what happened the day after. Oh, everybody, everybody was watching that battalion or brigade commander and Sergeant Major walk through the fucking post and just going, retarded.

When I was in guard, we had a new LT come in, and he's great dude, liked him a lot. But his first day, he comes in, he's like, oh, pretty easy going. I just have, like, two pet peeves. One, I don't like people sitting on tables. And, like, there was, like, four of us sitting on a table. So, like, we hopped up. Okay, no big deal. Whatever.

He goes, second thing, I don't like you guys looking at, or anything on your phones. And right as he says that, the commander was, like, poking his head in the door. And he goes, hey, that's not a rule. And he's like, come on, shoddy. It's a real dead quiet Like I like how your Commander came in

She's like Let them see tics Pretty much That's a whole new A whole new meaning To the word goon squad I don't want to see any more Penises on people's phones

You could put penises on phones Oh man It's just Just smacking the layup right out of the fucking air from the nosebleeds how the boy's going to relax if they can't send each other dick picks from strangers on the internet everybody knows that

big Goliath black guy with the dong we can't share that mean I think I've told this story before the funniest army prank I've ever seen was one of our cadets was a college wrestler he was fucking jack absolutely shredded when he was

shirtless and he had just got back from vacation right before AT and he had all these pictures taken to him on the beach, just jacked his shit, looked great, and he had just uploaded him to Facebook. He's a cadet, Mr. Squared away. He had his phone put away way before everybody else, before we were going into the field. So some of the guys in the platoon took all those pictures off of his Facebook and put them

on a Craigslist, men seeking his men's ad with his phone number and asked for dickpicks. And then we went into the field for seven days. his fucking phone had a seizure when he turned it back on miles and miles of dick got sent to that guy's phone you know it's a lot of dick and you have to measure it and feet

that's that's 5,300 and some odd feet a dick I've been so mad at my friends so mad I'd have been laughing really oh yeah I'd laugh I'd have laughed and then like oh my god those voice messages

The only thing that would have fucked me up is like the buttholes You know they're butthole pictures I'm not a fan of butthole pictures The man a man's butthole is probably One of the ugliest creations God Had ever made in his entire existence It's almost the only thing you could look at

And be like wow I wish that was Medusa actually Yeah, I'd rather die I've never I've never intentionally looked at a men's butthole A man's butthole And the moments that I have looked at a man's butthole I've been like, oh, oh, oh, why. Well, thanks to you, all of San Antonio's seen a man's butt hole.

That's not true. They can't see you through the forest. I combed all my hair inward that day, so it just looks like a dark crack. You can't see anything through it. It's a callous star. It's that PG-13 censorship. I get a thong of ass hair. Oh, what a horrible phrase.

This terrible combination of words. It made me think of Hakuna Matato when he said a horrible phrase. It's a thong of ass hair for the rest of your day. Holy shit God I miss you guys so much So so much Actually with the San Antonio Live shows we're doing our first one

Here in San Antonio Much bigger theater this time Actually we get to have this discussion Because I called you yesterday about it And Cody and Brandon said they'd sleep on it Because that was the first time Cody was like Wow hold on I was shocked to hear Cody

I know like oh okay And I put the ball and I was like Ball in your guys' court de moines we can do a second one because they they're like hey de moines de moines de moines de mones de mones de moines de moines plural stragglesa it's just de moines de moines we can do two shows same chicago's the next day this is the same night or the day before we get to make the choice on all of it oh same night i fucking told you the midwest would show up yes they're There's nothing to do.

Exactly. That's what I'm saying. There's Kansas City and Des Moines. You're like, oh, there's not a lot of people. We need to go to major cities. I don't understand. The entire Midwest is populated by people that look at a five-hour drive and go, yeah, it's no big deal. He was doing the thing where he argued with himself in the shower.

Like, no, damn it. Eli, there's a lot of people here. I'm not talking. I'm not shitting you. I was at the airport in Minneapolis, four and a half hours away from Des Moines. and the TSA guy's like, I'm so mad the Des Moines show sold out. Dude was going to drive four and a half hours at the drop of a hat. He just couldn't get tickets.

Well, the way you're saying it now sounds like we have to do it. I mean, I already knew his answer. Yeah, I started laughing immediately. He's like, so do you want it? I was like, you know what my answer is? Two in the same day might be aggressive. I might do the day before. No, I kind of, no, no, no, I like to the same day.

Nashville was funny. Fuck you. Dude, national is a good time. Without VIP, without VIP is not bad. Do we offer the tickets to the people that already bought tickets so you can see unsub and then unsub super fucked up?

Wasted addition. The blooper is real. We're going to tell the same stories, but this time we're fucking hammered. So you know, there's going to be tangents. Last time we didn't even tell the same stories. No. We were too shit wrecked and it changed. I don't remember. I can't tell you. Yeah, it switched a lot. They're like, it was a different show.

I remember a show. Two different shows. I was specifically saying, like, yeah, this is not scripted. None of this was, like, we had, like, an outline for the first show. This is, like, we're an hour into the show, and we've gotten a quarter of the way through the shit we had put down. How fast did Des Moines sell out? Yesterday. It was, like, within a...

How big is it yesterday? Ben, let me double check. I want to say it was yesterday. Yesterday at 1205, Des Moines sold out. How many seats? It's a bigger venue. I didn't know that. Horde.

De Moines. Nick. Des Moines. Tony's intern. Oh! That was the other funny one too. I loved, because I didn't even know about this part. Somebody else outside the group told me about it where Tony posted that thing that was

like National Intern Day and was just him on the Capitol steps with his interns. And it was just kidding, Nick, hi Tony's intern. So hundreds of comments. Oh shit, we're doing this again? Because you text me like two days later, you're like I didn't even see this. Like you piece of shit, I didn't even fucking catch that. 1,414 seats. So it's one of the quote-unquote smaller shows.

Yeah, small show. Bigger than any show we've ever done. Yes, it has. Yes. Yes. Digit. No big deal. It's just adding $200.

I'm not good at economy, so. What if we cancel Chicago? No, yeah. Jesus. Just start a war. What am I going to do with the new pistol that I bought? A war in Chicago. I'm going to have a special merch

made just for Chicago. It's going to be a deployment patch on the shirt. I'm just saying, I'm not saying, I literally wanted to give you guys the option on this one and Cody's response was the most surprising, because Brandon was there. What did I say?

Do you like a mouth full of hardwood? Yes, go on? Then boy, do I have a product for you. I'm re-enlisting in the Navy. No, not this time. Oh. The product is fume. What's fume?

It's an amazing device for those trying to kick those nasty habits. You said hardwood. You actually meant hardwood. I'm sorry to disappoint, but yes, I mean literal hardwood. I love hardwood in my mouth. Wait. You know what's gayer than hard wood in your mouth? Dying from cancer.

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Just had to tryfume.com slash unsub and use code unsub to start your good habit today. I was blown away. He was like, maybe. Well, yeah, basically he's like, oh, you know, maybe we'll look at that. I'm like, whoa. At first it was a no, no,

and then the amount of seats and everything. It's like, uh, before the question left your mouth, I said no. Yeah. You're like, all right, so just put it out there. I have to. We have the ability. Because the Des Moines show sold out so quick, I said, no.

Everyone said, no, no. Like, here is everything. You laid it out. I'm open to it. Well, well. I just, you're already there. Nashville was such a shit show. We only have to do two.

The good side is there it's only that day and the next day, if we do two. Yeah. It's kind of like when you bring a girl back to your house. Like, they're going to leave. We're already here. Yeah, but then it's like you have your whole, you know, night with the girl. And then you go back out for more spaghetti and do it again. Have you never lived, Brandon?

This is my, this is my opportunity. The longer I can keep you guys in Iowa, the more you'll like it. And then you'll have to move there. Yes, by doing stuff we hate. Just wait. Go interact your people. I'm like, oh, no. Dude, I can't wait to see the beaches and the mountains and everything else you guys have.

The homeless people and the low property taxes and the cheap houses. Think of all the flat land. Texas already doesn't have income tax. Like, we're pretty good here. Am I texting Ben, yes? No, not yet. Okay. These are questions I need to run by my wife.

Hold. Can I leave earlier in the day? Oh, you're still thinking two in one day. I'd rather just knock it out. Oh, God. We're already there. Sossed up, lubed, ready for pleasure. I understand what you're saying.

We get like a two-hour break to sober up. in between. Sober up. I know. No, no, no. That's actually worse. That's so much worse to do a two hour break in between. An hour break? You call me. Okay. Jesus. We wouldn't, I would not want to do, like, the biggest thing is like doing VIP and like having to people one on one like again on top of that. Like, because I remember that second VIP in Nashville. It was because there's a hundred also. People walking in bright eyed bushy tailed excited to see us and we're a fucking obliterated. Yeah. That's horrible. It literally, it looks like fucking all quiet on the Western front. When these like young kids are riding in and like the grizzled war veterans are leaving past them. I'm fucking leaning up against the alcohol cake. I'm really glad you came out to see us. Thank you

for the gift. I'm out there war off the crowd with shots. You guys need to catch up. Oh fuck, you need to catch up. Kind of like they caught up in Norfolk where you tossed the white claw, this historic feeder and

smashed it against the banister. I can't believe that rain down on everyone below. I can't believe that Virginians don't have hands. Like,

they can't catch at all. No one. Like horrible. Renowned for their fumbles. Right. Music City Miracle. Also, I'm sure they were

expecting you to throw a metal object to a second story. I did it several times before. I like, it was tossing three or four out. And the first few I love how it there's like four or five feet

of wall underneath it. It smacks the bottom. He's like, should have. caught it. First of all, it didn't hit the bottom. It hit the electrical light near the top. Oh, great. So they should have caught it. And they didn't, which created a hazard. That's on them. The one wife that had a white claw rained down on her was not happy. Weird. Yeah. The guys were all down there. They were like, yeah, it's raining white. It's funny. And the one wife was like, fuck, I'm fucking fall. You know, they're that poor husband. She did not want to go to that show. She's like,

No, this is not going to be a good time. It will be a blast. And then she gets fucking white claw reigned on her. Don't go to a Gallagher concert and expect not to have watermelon. I did I didn't expect to somebody. I did talk to somebody from Boston while I was up in Cape Cod. I said, oh, we were at the Boston show. Rich made fun of our daughter right out the gate.

I don't remember that particular interaction. No, I don't know. Yeah. She was like, oh, yeah, no, she fucking hated that. I was like, welcome. I'm like, well, you know. I love that she hated it. You just send the fucking drill sergeant out to the crowd.

It's, yeah, it's, shit, shit happens in the fog of war. I will say, I really enjoy getting to meet all of the women that show up to the show just because it's like, there's a distinct difference. 20% are there because there are fans and the other 80% were dragged there by their husband. And you can absolutely tell by body language and every. everything else. And you know who loves targeting them rich with the fucking superhero bit at the end. God, I love, look. I can tell the, I can tell when people are uncomfortable. And it is so much fun to go up to the uncomfortable people and make them worse. Anxiety, man. Tell me, Oedibis, darkest fear. Well, that's going to happen. We'll see if we do, too. After this, I will. figure it out. That's, oh, but yeah, go buy your tickets now. It's, they might be sold out by the

time you see this whenever it airs. This is true. Thank you. But, uh, Mr. Nick, what was the segment you were talking about earlier? Because you were like, hey, depending on when this releases. Oh, the economy is going to crash. Oh, so, wow, that's more scary when it's, we're filming this right now. Go on. Yes. How is it going to crash? Uh, well, so is Arizona, I see going up? No. No, worse. Oh, how can it be worse? So in 2008, the housing bubble

market crashed, right? And the reason that it crashed was because banks were getting subsidized loans through the government and basically banks were giving out home loans to people that probably shouldn't have been getting those home loans. Yep, to everyone. They would bundle those

together and sell them as an asset, right? They did a movie on it. The housing bubble crash. So the root issue is, finance people figuring out a way to loan people money that they probably don't have or shouldn't have and them not being able to pay it back, right? That's what crashed the entire fucking economy. Because they don't care if it defaults. I feel like you're about to hit on the Uber Eats thing. Yes. Do it.

Oh, yeah. Do it. The fact that you can get a loan on a fucking pizza. The burrito bubble is about to pop. The burrito bubble is about to pop. Why are you got to say that? Oh, oh no. Wow. The burrito bubble already popped. Trump's in office. Oh, I thought that was code for pregnancy. Funny, the burrito popped. How? You got to get the burrito popped. Because like the Karnum exploded.

Klarna, one of the three buy now pay later programs out there is like $170 million in the red because nobody's paying shit back because you let people finance burritos and you're shocked that they didn't pay you back for it. And it's like, look, if you're a credit institution and you're looking at all these signs of. whether or not this person is, you know, dependable and we'll pay their bills, right? Well, here's my, like, yeah, go ahead. You're just, you're looking at credit. You're looking at payment history. Like, all right, their depth of credit, your credit history. Skin color.

I'm pretty sure the fact that they would want to finance a fucking burrito is the biggest red flag you could possibly have. They're not. And that's the other thing is like a lot of people do it because they think that if, oh, I'm going to finance this fucking burrito because it'll positively impact my credit and I want to build credit. That's not how it works. That's 100% how it works.

No, it's not. They're not. I know economic. So I know that that's how it works. Just like you're an engineer. That you can tie shoelaces. I'm very good at knots. Bridges are made with knots. No, they're not.

Some of them are. What? Rort bridges. Haven't you ever heard of a rope bridge? This guy doesn't know anything about bridges. What an idiot. He's going to try and run for mayor. Let's go around San Antonio and see how many bridges are made with knots.

They're not. See? Now nobody knows whose side I'm on. They're all Bailey Bridges. A lot of them are Bailey Bridges. You wouldn't know what a Bailey Bridge is. You probably just think it's someplace that Irish people drink cream. That was there.

That was for me. It was not a good joke, but that was for me. Go on. I don't know where I was. We were talking about burrito bubble popping, which is not an analogy of a Mexican condom bursting. Yeah, no, it's going to pop. They're like $150 million in debt and they're starting to.

So when you buy a brito, they don't report to the credit agency that you paid back the brito, so it doesn't positively impact your credit. Can it negatively impact your credit? Technically, no, unless they report it to collections and sell off the debt, which is what they're doing with $150 million in debt. So now everybody that already can't afford anything definitely can't afford anything because they didn't pay back $0.75 on their fucking Chipotle order from February. And then that is going to be with fees immediately like $30 and then affecting your credit for years to come. I did not know that you could also loan, get a loan for a burrito. It's insane. But Nicholas, how can we prevent these people from the right that they deserve their God-given right of getting food delivered to their own?

God, I knew that was coming. I did this on Twitter. I love posting, like, slightly related shit on Twitter before a fat files video so I can hear all the stupid fucking arguments I'm going to get beforehand. some yes some idiot got on twitter after i like basically condense this conversation down to a tweet and is like door dash is a necessity i i swear to god this was the real talking point door dash is a necessity and you're a youtube millionaire that can't understand the struggles of the 99% and it's like i have the constitutional right to make a minority deliver me food for more money exactly yeah you got to pay extra for a white

Having a private chauffeur for your fucking Chipotle is a necessity. Yeah, and I don't want Imam Kabanegov sending it to me. I want Stephen Smith. So I'm going to pay that extra 10%. I don't want a guy who sounds like he could beat Sean Strickland in a fight. I don't want to be the guy. I don't want a guy that sounds like Sean Strickland's making a negative racial stereotype about to deliver.

me food oh my god i don't want a guy who sounds like the guy who's going to kick the ass of the fighter i like so yeah so what was the other defense for what how many people were defending this or thinking it was okay or so it's it's literally just people trying to justify their shitty behavior so this guy's argument because we got into it on twitter he said you need to understand that disabled people, it's their only option. I'm like, first of all, no, it's not. The fuck that they do five years ago. Disabled people have been around forever. DoorDash is new. Meals on Wheels is a thing. Most grocery stores deliver groceries. If you were ordering groceries and I was saying that grocery delivery services are bad, absolutely. You have a great point. Getting fast food

delivered to your fucking house is not a necessity. And I was like, that's less than 1% of the population that is so severely disabled that they need a food delivery or they'll starve to death. He's like well you think only one percent of people are disabled yes yeah and then i go at grok how many people are so disabled in the u.s that they have to fucking have food delivered or they'll starve to death and he goes it's hard to narrow it down but it's definitely less than one percent he didn't i like how like grok has become the new google it you know what i mean yeah oh you oh you don't think so you don't think that google it now it's like you're set to be careful you ask yeah yeah oh it was

did a good or a bad thing that six million people disappeared in 1945 to 1950 depending on which version of grok you ask you're going to get wildly different results yep that's why I made that question specifically I forgot about Mecca Hitler Mecca Hitler oh my god it was what a wild

time I also like you can make groc do it in different accents yeah oh that's my favorite can you forgot this I did I forgot about that you can say now say it in a Jamaican accent hey mom and it will do the

entire response in that oh but it won't spell it won't say it out loud it will type it as if yes yeah oh but you could tell you i say i say i say i say it's foghorn leghorn it's great grok will you explain the second amendment like foghorn leghorn to this radio i say the free rival people to get there they are god dang shotguns yeah boy I was really hoping that it would uh because I was hoping it was like going to be text to talk where it would give you a voice that it would respond with. And then I would be like, I want you to read this off as a person that has severe several palsy.

You know? It has to be fair. All right. Wow. Have you ever get in trouble. What's that? I'm a free speech absolutist. How dare you not let the differently able talk or have a voice for them?

Rich is the fucking guy from that skit where he's just like, all right. So I want the Second Amendment explained to me by Sidney Sweeney. grown approximately 30% larger than normal with a full bladder safety features off go I just want a person

of cerebral policy to tell me about the Second Amendment You're second amendment Sorry Dear God It's just They have a job Ever

We have very good union I'm with malice now Hashtag free speech That's a fuck I, so I only saw about three minutes of that debate. Yeah, a lot of people could not stomach it. My favorite part was the cutaways back to you. Because you look like the fucking girl from that Chick-fil-A meme, just that.

Your face is like, in the bag, he's like, I have a smart-ass comment and a rebuttal and the knowledge that Sun Tzu said, I should never interrupt my enemy when they're making a mistake and they're all battling in my head right now. Yeah, yeah. You have like 80 devils on your arms, but the angel was like, please, just. No, it was great because the devil and the angel were like, he's doing a really good job on himself. Just relax. You have no poker face, though, the entire time.

That's the only way I could talk. He was saying so much stupid shit that I was like, I can't interrupt him because he's doing a really good job. I'm making himself and his argument look dumb. So what am I going to do? I'm going to make faces of how I feel. And then hopefully the editor of the video will be like, look at the faces rich is making compared to what Michael's saying. And my God, did the editor nail it. Nailed it.

Oh, he nailed it. Today's unsubscribe episode is brought to you by booking.com. Booking dot, yeah. Cody, how much do we have to travel? We travel a lot. Actually, with the live tours, we use booking.com to set up everything as we go on this next journey of life. Because God knows it's a lot of travel and anything to make it easier is much appreciated. Brandon, so when you have to book for your partner, but they only want 800 thread count sheets.

Oh, that's easy, Eli. Get a new partner. No, go to booking.com. Oh. Before we had any sort of relationship with booking.com, I have used the service before. Genuinely, sometimes they have really good deals. One of the great things about booking.com is it provides really accurate reviews, like really detailed reviews.

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It's one of the few times in my life we're saying less got me more. It was, and I like a lot of the stuff Michael Malice has done before. Like, don't get me wrong. Like, I agree with a lot of the shit that he says in other areas, but like just the one v.1 between you was.

Showing up to a debate and then saying I'm not here to debate was peak. Peak logic. Yeah. I liked how he, he said that officers never used their discretion and were just rule followers. And then when I talked about a time that I used discretion stated how he hates

that I used my discretion. And then one of them was police have all the power. They control the politicians. Also, that was the one that got me. I was watching that on a fucking plane. And I made the face you made. I was like, what the fuck are you done? Yeah, but defund the police is all our idea, guys.

Got him. I really liked when he showed up in a police outfit to be funny and then brought a puppet to be funny and then the second rich made a joke he's like notice how he uses sarcasm to try to defuse the situation he's going to have to use a lot of comedy to get his points across while he's wearing a fake fucking mustache in a costume yeah it's funny it's great i'm just thinking like i know all sorts of cops who just love their county and city government and their d a they're just always best buddies and they always get along and you know they always have the police's best interest in mind wow every time this guy really likes michael mouse yeah

they're the ones who really you know the tail wags the dog it's totally you didn't Michael did do a joke at the beginning the my mom oh I want to see

Brandon's reaction so I don't know this one my interactions with Michael this is behind the scenes my interactions with Michael were not pleasant I met him and Tim

introduced Michael to me and he's like you know so insane so, so and so. And he's like, oh, Michael, this is, this is, uh, rich high. He's the, uh, police officer that you're going to be debating today. And I go, literally in my stupid, just most friendliest non-convertational tone, I go, hey, Mike, how you doing? Just intentionally just, hey. And he was like, oh, Mike, okay. And in my head, I'm like, I don't know if this is this, like, you're trying to like, fuck around and bullshit with me, but like, Mike is normally a pretty normal nickname for

Michael. Nobody called this guy Mike before. All right. Well, whatever. It's not like he said, like Richard to dig. Which is what was going on in the internal dialogue later on in the show. So, but you were just being friendly. Yeah, I was just being friendly. I was just being friendly. I was, hey, Mike. And he didn't like that. And I could tell that like something was off, but I was like, this isn't, I can't tell if this is real or bullshit, whatever. And so we start, the group starts talking and Michael said something. And I forget what it was. Do you remember what I told you what it was. You made a statement about something with the police. A cop assaulted his mother.

So, well, but there was like some lines before that. We had a quick back and forth. He said something about, um, police and I said a quick joke back. And out of nowhere, he goes, a cop assault in my mother. And I'm like, in my head, I was like, there's two reasons why you do that. Either one, you're trying to like take this topic and go way off. And left field to be funny to or two you're taking this topic way off into left field not to be funny and like take me off my balance but to like attack me and be like all cops my mom you know that's that's who you are because it happened to my mom that's who you are and so i was like so either way it's just a poor joke and you're not going to get me like you can't get me to back off

so i'm going to say something quick and fast and is equally off color So I, what did you say? I said, well, what was she wearing? God damn it, Richard. The audience is right now trying not to laugh. Yeah. You know what I mean? If you're going to be a dick and be like, you know, cops rape my mom, I'd be like,

oh, geez, what was she wearing? You know? Duh. Was she asking for it? I cannot fathom why he didn't get along with you. Don't throw that in my lap. So. And then I knew that it was like some sort of weird trick because he's like,

aha, you see cops will always try to use their force over somebody and they it was just a dumb line. My problem is that that's a totally unrelated like just allegorical thing that it seems like that he's just throwing that out there where if you're talking about bigger points

right, he just throws something like that out there like ha you can't defend against this. We were just talking. This is just like a I thought it was friendly back and forth until he did that and I was like what was the conversation about before that? It was just kind of like talking about random cop stuff and some things going on. And then, like I said, he said something, I said something, and then, like, is a quick retort because he was, like, jabbing me with some, like, you know, jokes or whatever.

So he's like, he jabs me with something. I, you know, I throw it back at him. And then he's just like, my mom is. And I'm like, all right, this is either you try to catch me off balance and make me feel uncomfortable. Like shock kind of thing. Yeah. And be like, oh, my God, I'm sorry. Or you're, this is a joke.

This didn't actually happen. And you're still trying to catch me off balance. So I was like, boom, fire something back. Did it end up being a real thing? I didn't ask. I mean, if it's a real. It's literally. It's literally the kid in school when you were doing your mama jokes.

I said, my mom died. Yeah. You're trying to make me feel bad or you're trying, you think this is funny. Yeah. It's a liberal equivalent of, I'm offended for the people that aren't here in the room, so you can't do that. It's him trying to kill the joke that I said and stop me from being funny in the conversation because he wants it or he wants it to go somewhere else, whatever. So that goes on.

And it's, you know, radio silent for a couple minutes there. and then he starts, you know, like, getting his costume on. And I think it's funny. I'm like, dude, that's funny. You were texting me. You were texting me as this was happening because I was like worried about how this whole thing was going to go. And he's like, oh, dude, this is going to go great. He's a performer because he's dressed up in a costume and now he's not talking to me.

It's a joke. I don't talk to cops. This is hilarious. You were so excited going into it. Yeah. And then when it ended, you called me and were so disappointed. So disappointed. So disappointed.

Everyone was. We talked for like an hour and a half about how disappointed you were. I felt so bad. And not for like anything that I did. I was just like, that just didn't go well. I felt bad for the audience, honestly,

because like the amount of times the audience was told to shut the fuck up. And malice was like, I'm not here to talk to Randos. I don't want to take questions from the audience. What the fuck? He literally said that. I don't, I'm not here to talk to Randos.

He's like, you're not here to talk to. Who the fuck are you here to talk to? You're not. not here to debate rich you're not here to talk to the audience what the fuck you're here for like i don't know it just a terrible live show like people showed up paid money to be there and then they're treated like shit that is the mind blowing to see the responses and then telling the audience to shut up or hey who's saying that and then one of his friends was the only one yeah there was a there's a guy

who's funny but he he was in the back of the audience and he was trying to like chirp mike and be a part of the show and like we know you can't you can't do that Yeah. Like, if one of us... There's a difference between a heckler and... Yeah. Yeah. Like, if one of us, if all of us were doing a show, but Nick was sitting down in the back

because it was, you know, it was our show and Nick was there to support us. If Nick started screaming a bunch of shit with us while we're on stage trying to do our performance, whatever it is, we'd be like, Nick, what the fuck are you doing? If you wanted to be a part of the show and you should have come up here, don't fucking take away from the show and put the spotlight on you. And don't try to add to the show because what you're doing when you add to it is you're being a heckler. you're stopping the environment up here from our back and forth that's going

we're now distracted by this and now we got to just now we're distracted by it and it's hard if you're not used to it it's hard to ignore it right there's a time in a place to call out and make audience participation and the audience participation other than the questions that they were asking was kind of rough it was a little rough a little cringy um but yeah and that after that entire thing was it like a Q&A or like what was the yeah there's like an hour Q&A at the end Oh, my fucking, yeah. Well, if you're literally asking the audience to participate, then what the fuck? Yeah.

There's an hour Q&A? Yeah. I think the Q&A was longer than the actual quote unquote debate. It was. Oh. Whoa. And it's about too much. Even the audience was fucking up Michael Malice's talking points.

Mm-hmm. Because his whole, his entire stance was he opened up with, I want everybody to say it with me, cops are human and humans are at fault. So that's why humans shouldn't have power over other humans because they'll exploit it. Reasonable point. So an audience member gets up there. And I was like, so in your world with private security, is the private security going to be like AI robots or what's the deal? And he's like, I don't know.

It's like, well, dude, the one that opened my eyes and you brought it up was who is going to defend against immigration. Oh, yeah. Because that's the one, like his brain is shut down. Literally just goes, oh, I guess Tim wins. I don't have an answer for this. What? Michael Mouse literally, like, because Tim Poole is the one that asked him that question. Who's going to enforce the borders?

And he's like, well, I. think that a country needs to have strong borders, so there does need to be some enforcement there. And Tim goes, I agree, who's going to do it and who's going to fund it? Like, who's the customer? And he's like, I don't know. And Tim goes, oh, so that's it. I win the debate. And he goes, I guess so. And then they just move on. I was like, what the fuck are we talking about? He wouldn't answer his questions for a long time, though. He kept just pushing him aside. Not a long time. Never. He never articulated anything. Oh, he'd say, like, I'd put words in his mouth, which I wasn't. And if you tried to clarify what he meant,

he would accuse you of putting words in his mouth. Which I got used to. And so like later on in like the half hour of the show where it's, you know, the debate, I kept using the words like I feel intentionally. I was like, Michael, I feel like you're saying this. Is that right? And he'd be like, stop putting words in my mouth. I'm like, no, no, I didn't.

I said I feel. That's me. I'm feeling this. Can you help me out? Oh, I started doing. Yeah. I started getting like confrontational. And I'm like, all right, cool.

I'm going to listen. I'm going to be a good listener. I'm going to interview him as if he was a suspect. And I'm like, cool. This is how I feel. It's called juxtaposition. You said this, but yet you've said this. Well, that's mirroring.

Sorry, that's different. Either way, I forget the terms. Anyway, I say, I feel this. Is that the way that you feel to clarify? And he just, he wouldn't answer it. He'd be like, it's not putting words in my mouth. And it's how every therapist wants you to talk to your partner is taking out you, you, you. And it's like, hey, I feel this way.

It is the appropriate way to interview somebody or have a conversation. If time travel ever becomes a thing, I'm going to go back in time to the minute where you get up behind Michael and say you're going to give him a hug because you're trying to defuse the situation. And he says, don't touch me. That's assault. Yo, what? That happened? Yeah, I went to hug him. He went to hug him. I was like, hey, because we agreed on something. Yeah. So I was like, yeah, we agreed on something. And I get up and I go to give him a hug. And he's just like, don't touch me. touch me, that's assault. If

Rich would have said, what are you going to do call the cops? It would have been the greatest fucking nuke drop of all fucking people. That is, all right, I take half this stuff I said back. That's, he was being completely serious. A hundred percent. He's been a dick. He wouldn't have actually

called the cops. What happened after the show? So, like, before we even go up on stage, I'll tell you that, before we even go up on stage for the debate, he's like, now he's just not talking to me. He's got his back to me. We're like in a line to let go up, you know, like on the stage. Then I'm like, Mike, you're doing, you know, a funny joke.

You know, I don't talk to the police. Don't talk to the police. So you're not talking to me. That's funny. Like, that's funny. I like it. That's a good joke. Ba, blah, blah.

And I keep trying to talk to him. And he's just like, like locked up, focused, ignoring me. And I'm like, okay, this is the way that it's going to be. If he's going to, this is the way it's going to be. All right. So he ignores me. And then, you know, we do the debate. And then the debate's over.

and everybody goes to leave. I stick around because there were some people that wanted to say hi to me, and I did a couple of shots with some fans. And then we go to this food joint down the street. And there's Tim and Ellis and Michael Malice there from the show. And they're all at their table. And somebody's wife or girlfriend's like showing up. And I'm about to sit down at the table.

And I look over at Alice and I'm like, hey, bud, I made a joke. about like you taking it up the ass I go you looked at me like I just shit on you I go just a joke we cool he's like oh yeah man you're totally fine I was like sweet just want to be cool he shot me look like I might have went too far Ellis nice guy that's pretty much everybody like Tim and everybody on his team are like they're pretty chill dudes yeah everybody's very level-headed I knew he knew it was bullshit and he's a comedian he's been at roast before like you know me saying like this your teardrop tattoo mean how many dicks you take or how many people you killed is one of the least defensive things

you could say but I wanted to make sure that everything was okay because but You're being a reasonable guy. You're like, hey, man, just in case I went too far. Yeah. Here's, you know, olive branch. Make sure we're not actually, we don't have a problem. And plus, I don't know what the fuck I did to mail us, but he already doesn't like me. So I might as well be extra careful and be like, hey, just so we're cool. Not my bad.

My bad. He's like, now you're fine. And then I look over at Michael. And I'm like, Mike, that was fun. It was, you know, a cool time. It was nice meeting you. It's fun. Blah, blah, blah, blah.

And he's like, he's like your son. Just no eye contact. Looking away from me. And we'll not. out of here. Yeah, I don't like you. I hope you die. And I'm like, how you do? And I say, you know, nice things. I'm like, good thing. Nice to meet you. I put my hand out. And he's just not looking at me and just refuses to shake my hand. I'm like, oh, that. Okay. Cool. And I literally go, cool. I'm going to go sit at this other table. Nice seeing you, Tim. And then I just turn around and

sit down. And then Michael leaves and I get, you know, Tim calls me over. He's like, hey, Hi, Rich, come here. And I was just like, oh, can I sit at the cool kids table now? Am I cool now? Can I do that? Now that Michael's gone. What were those bitches called? Mean girls.

Mean girls. What were their names, though? There were all the Allison. Oh, I don't know that. They were all the same girl name. What movie? It was like. Mean girls or?

Oh, Regina, Norris, Mama. I thought there was a movie where it was all girls had the same name like the Ashleys. Something like that. Whatever. So I, I poked fun at that because, you know, they were all hanging out with malice and, you know, I'm the new guy. And I sat down and Tim and Alice were like, uh, we don't know what happened there, but Michael has never acted that way towards anybody. I think through all of our years in business on the internet, we've all used Shopify. I've used it for merch and my skate shop and a couple other businesses.

I will actually agree 100% on that. Everything we do is run through Shopify. Even bunkers run through Shopify. Our shoes, which is a separate company, is run through Shopify and they talk together because of Shopify. Shopify runs the world. Did you know Shopify will actually help you design a website also, Cody? I know I didn't know about starting an online store when I started my career online. Shopify just made it super, super easy for my dumb.

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And that's just super weird. We just don't know. We just don't know. We don't have any reasoning for why you would do or act that way. That pisses me off is that inability to talk to somebody that you disagree with and actually just be like a normal fucking person. Like even even again, like I hate to bring it back to this. But after the last campaign, me and Tony sat down twice as just like normal fucking dudes willing to shake hands like, all right, hey, that's over. We disagree on several things. But all right, tensions down. And just have like a normal fucking lunch. Yeah. Right. Before or after the cuckolding. well we are back in the throes yes we are no this was this was after the end of the last last election like we everything was done we're like all right well you know what gentlemen shake hands that was the one thing I was big on it's like I wanted to give him

that call like hey you know I want to shake your hand I want to shake his hand I want to shake his hand you and I are both that drunk dude trying to shake the Jewish guy's hand on the plane you have Tony and me with Michael I want to shake your hand Play the video. Editor, play the video. I'm going to shake your hand. I'm going to shake your hand.

Shake your hand. No, but it was good. Like, just a really reasonable conversation. That's just really shitty that that guy, like, even after the dust had settled and after like everything was all done, all the public facing stuff, like he still wouldn't look you in the fucking eye. I feel like it was just a mask. I feel like he was trying to do a bit.

He was trying to prove a point or something because when he was doing it, it was very awkward. There wasn't real. It wasn't real hate. You know what I mean? I've dealt with real hate. I've had people look at me in the face and tell me that I should die and kill myself. Like, yeah, I've been on the ride on you.

Yeah, I know that people really hate me. Like, I know. Is it real hate from somebody who's not confident enough to express it or employed? I was talking about the protesters, not Michael, although I'm sure that that, I'm sure all those video comments are really helping you in the algorithm. So you're welcome. He's getting lamb. He lost a lot of. friends on that line. Lamb basted. So where were we? Because I don't I always had a very yeah the real

hatred. I'd always had like a fairly positive like in my my friend circles and whatnot people always like he's a pretty good guy like stuff like that. So I'm like okay so him debating my my actual friend this should be very fun like I'm looking forward to this. Everybody said the same thing to me too nice guy really entertaining fun to be around nice guy nice guy and to say unilateral is an understatement. My God, like you select him from everything I've been told. And I did that by shutting up. So, yeah, one of the things that Zach and Nick texts me right away, they're like, we can't believe that you didn't like talk more. And I said, you know, Sun So the art of war. If your enemy's making a mistake, don't stop them. You know, let them keep talking. So I didn't say as much

as I wanted to. And I just, I let my faces do the talking for me, which is perfect. Because there's nothing like, you know, somebody going, well, you know, I think this point, and then you're doing a total, like, like, stink face at him. It's, it's fucking, it takes almost all the wind out of their sales, especially when the camera cuts to you full screen. Yeah. You were like that little fucking taxidermy, like the little white monkey thing, just that. Congratulations on that way. Yeah, my first debate. Want to know. Very nice. Yeah. did you think it was going to be a little bit closer at all or at least some pushback with some of the questions i know we did a pre-vis of it yeah and apparently that worked really

better it didn't work at all you know but that went no other points yeah it was still better than anything that happened and actually discussed people were saying that in the comments you're like wow your prep really helped you i'm like my prep did nothing I sat there and shut up for most of it and made faces. I didn't, the prep did nothing. It's like prep for D-Day where you're like, okay, we're defending the beach. We got the people here, here.

We got landmines set up. Okay, we got everything. This is the way we're going to run this. And then as soon as they drop the fucking ramps, they all drown. You're like, well, huh. I feel like. Good thing we trained. I feel like I exposed you to some concepts you weren't aware of that did get brought up.

Yes. The private security thing did get brought up. But it was so fucking. poorly articulated and stupid you didn't even have to say anything no i just got to sit there and say the greatest debate strategy for me was tell me more about that please explore this i think that was back when we were in when charleston right like you had brought this up you were you were you were going to uh to do this debate i think so did i yes charleston yeah well yeah it had been planned before there's one of my faces yeah that's that's my visual

visual pain of him saying something dumb and me going it's just you trying not to turn into the Hulk the entire time I'm already green look at my shirt and I rep you boys because I wore a poncho shirt a button to little high

little high I couldn't let all the hamburger meat out you know this is you know I can't just like the comments in the video are brutal there's over 7500 comments on it and so many of them less than 1% are positive you can scroll and they get 50 comments in a row of why is Michael Malice an asshole? Or like, even people are like, I'm a huge Michael Malice fan.

I've never seen him act this bad. Or I've never seen him perform this poorly. Or I'm a legitimate anarchist and I'm disappointed this guy's the face of my movement. Like people that are on his team that are like mad at how bad of a job he did. You also got to hang with my boy, Alex. Stein. Oh, yeah, nice guy. Oh, yeah.

How was that? I did like you were like, Alex. Yeah. Oh, yeah, 20%. 20% 20% in Alex. I think I said that. I think I said that.

I might have actually said that. Do you remember? I remember. So Alex was originally on my boxing card. Oh, you're going to fight Alex Stein? No, no, no, no. He was fighting this other guy, Modine, who ended up, my God, what a, what a fucking fight that would have been if Alex actually ended up fighting him. Because the guy was a total pushover.

Oh, really? But the guy was, he was a Muslim, right? And so Alex is trying to, he's like, I just try to figure out how to fuck with him. Like I want to figure out like, oh, how do we ramp up the press conference kind of thing? Because, you know, me and the guy that I fought, we had no fucking problem with each other. So we didn't fake any drama, if they'd be for anything. He's, you know, Alex is a performer. Like, he's trying to go above and beyond, like, be over the top.

I said, dude, you should throw turkey bacon at him in the press conference. Like, it's real bacon. Yeah. But it's turkey bacon. And so he's like, oh, that's such a good idea. Like, this, this, this, he told Modine's manager ahead of time. He's like, hey, just so you know, we're going to do this in the press conference. So you know, this is not actual pork.

Like, we're not actually crossing any actual boundaries. Like, this is, this is turkey. I'll show you the packaging. You know, I'm just doing this as a bit kind of thing. The people that run DeZone got so upset, they pulled the fight. They were like, you're going to throw turkey bacon at our guy. No, it happened. Oh, they swore

So Mo Dean and his team was like, oh, that's funny They actually thought it was a funny bit Moe had no clue Oh, Moe didn't know. He didn't know And then like went up and like tried to like They tried to like fight fight And then you know all the He told him afterward like hey you know

This was a fun this was a bit Whatever his team told him They were both cool They both still wanted to do the fight Because Dezone is owned by so many Saudis that were actually offended Oh even if it was a bit they still pulled the fight he never got to fight oh my god because they would have been so embarrassed if he lost too

he would have pork thrown at him and then he loses that uh mo hashtag philippines 2.0 round one mo Dean ended up having a fight at one point and if you watch him fight it was embarrassing it's like picking on the fat kid at school it was bad but poor guy yeah he did not train for a boxing match and i think he got knocked out unlike those uh he was so confident i think he just quit yeah oh yeah he he got knocked down and he got winded and then he just gave up he didn't like and he was so confident like he had that like oh I got all these gold chains like that kind of thing going on and it was humiliating I do remember him saying he sparred twice going into that whole match I was like oh buddy you should have sparred way more now he's like why my trainer said

it wasn't necessary I was like you're trained lied are we sparring more yeah yeah yes good of course we can do it tomorrow okay I'm down I'd go buy a mouthguard. I got some. We just got to mold it. Oh, okay. New. Yeah, brand new.

They're in. Here's a bit of Ely's of old mouthguards. It doesn't fit. Huh, weird. You're so chewy. There's something growing in mind. They're universal. Why is there pinto beans?

But yeah, we're going to go sparta? It's not plaster, is it? No. Drywall mud. Get him? Because I want to see. I want to see him's far. I want to see J.D.

Delay's far. This would be good time. We've already said this on the podcast. J.D., fighting J.D. would be kind of scary. I don't think I would enjoy that. I thought bigger, guys. Fighting J.D. is his friend with rules and he has gloves on is fine. Having J.D. actually be mad and want to kill you.

It would be much more scary. The guy who put rotten mayonnaise up his asshole might be a pretty crazy fire if there's no rules. I'm not concerned about, hey, let's touch gloves and spar for two minutes as much as I am. It's like, oh, JD's upset at me and I'm going to have to take a piss in the same bathroom as him at some point. Look, my liver's been through a lot. It's never been through the non-business end of a pointed fucking chick-fil-a sport. 37 times. Oh, man.

I told you not to disrespect me in the yard. Dude, Nick, what's the next thing you're working on right now? I'm doing that Klarna video, and then I'm working on a Sergeant Stubby video. Sergeant Stubby is the Marines bold dog, is it not? No, Sergeant Stubby is the boxer from World War I. No, Sergeant Stubb, yeah, the boxer, the breed of dog. Yes. Mutt, yeah.

Oh, was it a mutt? Yeah. It looked like a part boxer. It's part Bucer. I know what I'm talking about. Yeah. Don't look at me like that. You're American history down, all right, Santa Maria.

The first one. Which one? You got the first one wrong. Yeah. Well, there was only so many Sergeant Stuby's. I thought there was. This one. Yeah.

I didn't go like down the list of all the animals. I was like, I don't know what's going on. Was it in the movie War Horse? I like horses and war. War Horse. I'm also like halfway through that Sleid Island book that I bought

when we talked last on the podcast. It's about to get real aggressive. You weren't fucking kidding. Oh. Just the way it's written. I'm like this. Oh, the dude? This did not go through a publisher.

You can read books and you can really tell when it's like, okay, there's three types of war books. This is third. person completely after the fact by somebody that did a ton of research all three can be good there's ones that were you knew written by a ghost writer and consulted by the person that actually did the stuff but they hired a professional writer to help him out and then there's ones where just some grizzled veteran sat down and wrote how he fucking felt about it and this is one of those to a level that i've never seen before it's the most aggressive book i've ever written in

I'm genuinely not sure there's a single page without something that would be considered a slur. Oh, one of us. That is accurate. I'm just reading it. I'm just like any page you open it up to.

It's like the fucking geogess or in India like find a place on the map without trash. And poop. You just like open up that page. You're just like, there is. There you go. Just some old guy on a typewriter like one fingering it. And I told that.

dirty get off my motor cycle. Yeah. There's a lot of parts of that book that didn't make it into the video. A lot. How much are you?

Do you talk about any black soldiers? No, there's nothing with black relations in the book, really. Oh, okay. I was really hoping. He goes in. He goes he goes in detail about he had an M1 grand when he hit the beach and picked up a carbine off of somebody else and ditched his M1 grand because he was a smaller dude and the M1 grand is so much heavier and the carbine is so much lighter and like just repeatedly he's like never should have done that he goes I'm having a mag dump every motherfucker I kill instead of so 30 out of six going through your chest instead of a 30 out six just dropping somebody So there's all kinds of crazy shit in that book. That is the ultimate like 9 mil versus 45 fudlore there.

I can't go against his personal experience, but I will say that if you're doing like the shit that he was doing where you've got eight dudes you're going up against, I'd take a carbine. Quick reload, you know, 20 rounds. In the jungle, close distance, everything. Like you don't need the five, five, six hundred yard capability of 30 out six. Well, the bullet dynamics maybe

The ballistics were just worse at that period of time You're also fighting dudes that weigh 90 pounds It's true So it's like 30 out six 80% of the energies put in the tree behind it Yeah I don't know I wouldn't there

But that's my thing like I do whatever he wanted to do After reading his shit and like you know what That guy fucking says that's what he wanted Fucking give it to him man He wanted his Harley He definitely wanted a Harley The best part was just going back and finding his commanding officer

after the fact like years later just an old man talking about going out on patrol with him I went out there with him because I wanted to see how it was done and we went up to the mouth of the cave and he starts yelling some fucking gibberish into the cave I can't understand what the fuck they're saying and I'm like hey what are you saying

he's like I told him to get the fuck out here I'm going to blow them all up it worked it just some southern dude just blown away he's like I'll never doing it again yeah one guy runs out like a bayonet They shoot him and the rest of them are like, oh, that's a bad idea.

He's the serious. Maybe we should have risen to him. His English and not very good. Have you gotten to all the crazy conspiracy stuff and the Fidel Castro stuff yet? No. Oh, it gets so much worse. Oh, I'm excited. Is he going to deepen?

About 65% of the book is about his war experience. About 5% is about after the war. And the rest is, The government has been seized by communists that are trying to erode American values. He's not wrong. 60 to 70 pages of it. And you're like, holy shit. This homie's spinning.

You can't say any of this. Was he right? You got to read the book. Oh, he's kind of right. That's how you know it's self-published. He's like, now I'll get to what I want to talk about. Dude, legit. A hundred percent.

Epilogue. That was called The Hook. I'm two-thirds of the way through the book, and I've just now gotten to the foreword. The epilogue. Holy shit. I need to read this. It's aggressive.

Dude, I'm so excited for major capers. Capers? Yeah, capers. Yeah. Sorry, Major James Capers. That'd be cool. That one's going to be dope. Are you going to interview somebody that's not dead yet?

We're working on it. Yeah. He's coming. We have them said, oh, when do we have? He only does stories on people that. interviewed. I'm like, I'll,

he's interviewed some corpses. He's just poking it. Do some stuff. Actually, now I got to see the major. Dude, he's got some of the coolest pictures from when he was in the service.

Just him and his tan t-shirt with a big old stogie in his mouth, ripped his shit. Oh, I know who you're talking about now. Yeah. I've seen some of this shit. Yeah,

yeah. He was the poster child for the Marines, like the literal poster child. We talked about him. Yes. Yeah, the black guy that, I believe he was the first black man.

to receive a in the field commission ever in the Marine Corps because he became an officer in the field because that was the thing that they're trying to get him a medal of honor because they said the only reason he didn't get it was because of his race yeah basically now trying to find he was one when I met him the weirdest thing I was like oh he's in a wheelchair I was like oh hey nice to meet you sir um been down like look he's wearing his medals I'm like holy shit you got shot a lot Like, yeah, the PS5 Purple Hearts just stacked. I was like, what the fuck?

And then they started filming me in on what he did. And his accomplishments, Homeboy just stacked bodies. The guy that helps him and walks him around in, or pushes him around in his wheelchair, was like, yeah, he's the only dude I know that has a confirmed knife kill. And then two sidearm kills. It's like, what? Now, yeah. Just to clarify something I'm not sure about when it comes to Purple Hearts, right?

That's not sure. You've got lots of experience in that. Fuck off. How many do you have? It's kind of like eight or six now. You're obviously, it's when you get wounded in the line of duty, right? Yes. And it's separate events.

That's what that was the clarification. So it has to be each separate event you've been shot or wounded or, you know, shrap on whatever. So if you get shot nine times in one battle, it's one purple heart. Yeah. You don't get like one per bullet. So it's, it's an engagement. So even if like you get shot a bunch and then like on the way out or like an hour later,

you get blown up again. It's just like Roy Benavina is what I got like. one Purple Heart for that day when he was in a seven-hour firefight. Damn, okay. Yeah. I figured that was probably the case, but I wasn't sure. It'll be around the end of October, if that works, or we can do early September. Whatever works for him. I'll figure it out. Yeah, that's what I was. Exactly. It was like, whatever this dude wants, we will work around his schedule because he is a fucking...

That would be a very cool thing for you. If you just did like your normal video, as if like you're just telling this guy's story. Well, it's the thing I want to, but I need, like, if I'm going to do somebody that's alive, I need their permission to put the video out. So, like, I got to make my video. I got to have him watch it and be like, yes, that's good to go. But I mean, like, what you normally do, like your whole normal video and then like at the end, we're normally after the, you know, all right, and best way to support

the channel, go to Fat Electrician.com, whack bang out. If you want to see me interview him. Well, no, just like where it normally cuts, like just your outro music and you play like a little clip of the person it just cuts to you in your studio with the guy yeah you win the metal that you know who else said he'd come on that i got a hold of who's that sammy lee davis no shit yeah he said he'd come on no shit so we're gonna schedule that sammy lee davis is the medal of honor recipient who's medal of honor citation like when he earned the medal of honor is what forest gump was based on oh yes yeah so he'll be cool as shit to have on how many purple hearts

now I guess you'd have give him a doctor pepper oh my gosh a whole crate of Dr. Peppers I'm looking more into this dude I don't know on the Sean Ryan show that was one of his statements that he does make and he was known for I think Sean read it he's like hey this is a statement you made

you got to kill them all because during his Vietnam or whenever it was like yeah you just got to kill them all this best thing you can do just kill all of them it's like okay that's what the fuck and then he has a, I do believe he has a PTSD movement in that show, because he goes like, that. Sean's like, hey, you good?

You good? He's like, hey, sorry. And she walks back on Sean. Sean's like, what the, V-Cong girl, Robbie. He was like, a moment. Oh, a full-on moment telling a war story. Is this, there a war? Oh, shit.

Dude, Annie, where's his cowboy boots? Yeah. Nice. But his team was super nice. And this is like JTAC and Cag dudes, like Delta Boys, that help him and make sure he's okay and taken care of. And they speak so highly of that, dude. I'm like, that is dope. It's awesome.

Yeah. Yeah. And then it was him. And then there was like three or four medal of honor recipients there, all just old as shit. But the old ones, the older ones. They're all just old and shit. I mean, a majority are old as shit. pooping in their diapers getting pushed around

by guys in wheelchairs fucking boomers the greatest generation of my ass sucking up social security like a bunch of copies that they fought what's that we should do chess boxing I've seen that took one minute boxing or one minute chess

one minute boxing or is it one round I always forget I don't know I think it's round around I think it's two minutes two minutes or whatever either way we should do it we should do checkers I just don't want to play Eli I'll play anybody else playing chess against Eli's fucking stupid.

I'm, that's because I'm retarded and I started. I know, I know. I've been in your office. There's two books. It's anime and how chess strategy are the two books in your fucking office.

And then I come here the next day, you're like, oh, do you want to play chess? I'm like, fuck, here we go. You're good at chess and boxing. It's fucking annoying. I like to do both of these things.

I don't mind like, I don't mind like, I like chess. I can think 10 moves ahead. But you're like reading strategies and shit. So it's like, I go to like, oh, I move a pawn. And Eli's like, you're playing.

the fucking South African butt trumpet strategy huh? You've got all the weird fucking terms and shit, I don't know. And I'm like, this isn't good at all. I move my pawn back. I'm not playing that strategy. No, you're playing the fucking tuba. It's a different strategy. If you play the South African butt trumpet, I'm just going to counter you with the fucking Dutchman's

cum sock. It's not like, I don't you're saying words, Eli. It doesn't make any fucking sense. Man, now I know why everybody was watching the Queen's Gambit show. This sounds hot. we can definitely do that chess people are but you're hoars are you gonna boxing jd

boxing tomorrow next day i thought you said today will never i wore my boxing underwear i wore my boxing underwear is like the scariest shit that's some of the best advice i've ever had always be ready

to shut your pants it's nice to know that we have limits i know brandon's like from this period to this period. I just need a couple of left and right limits. You're kind of like Germany after World War II. Like, there was nothing that happened between

1940 and 1955. People are on vacation. Don't bring it up. Never ask a man his salary, a woman her age, or any German company what they were doing between 1939 and 1945. Yep. Some would say

it was quite righteous. We got Fanta out of it. Yeah. Silver lines. Got Hugo Boss. This is true. D-Dub. Yeah.

The bug. Great road system. It's a people's car. It's a people's car. Great road system. And then, oh, fucking, he got an MP7. That did happen. How'd you get an MP7?

I had to pay a lot of money. But yeah, it was, we ended up getting, actually, that video is going to go up, like, in time of recording in like 20 minutes. Good. But, yeah, we've, I, of course, that. was the only video. There's a lot of videos that Cody's been in before. Just seven minutes of Cody furiously masturbating over the top of it. Way more on the pepper box cut, way more than that. It was it was the only video he's ever been like, can I be in that? Whenever you do it, can I be in that? You go two hours to be in that video. Yeah, yeah, because we, that was when we

were filming a bunch of stuff. We were batch filming stuff at drive tanks. Yeah, but yeah, we've, we've got an MP7 now. I say we, like, we're all just like a collective, but. We've gotten an M-B-7. I'm so excited. Yeah, we've done it in that. I don't know what we've discussed in the last. These episodes are all just like piled together because we have to prep for the live shows. So it's like episode, episode, episode, episode, episode, episode, episode, and then you run out of shit to talk about or you forget, especially in my case, just forget what we talked about.

What are your other videos coming up, Brandon? We've got the... Any reaction videos to online shenanigans? Probably soon. Nice. We've got the Lewis video. The Lewis gun, actually. Oh, so this is actually really cool.

Yes. So the Lewis machine gun, right? Is that the one that was stamped by the British for World War II because they didn't have anything? That's the, so that you're probably thinking of the Sten submachine gun. I'm thinking of the Sten. So the Lewis is the thing that looks like the old flying saucer. Yeah, the saucer, the PanMag, the D.P. The carousel, like the carousel projector.

Oh, the one with the big water. Cooled barrel? Yes. Okay. So that right there, something I learned about it that I did not know, because I always thought that that's a British machine gun, right? Did the Germans make that too? It was made by an American. That's actually something that we did. What? And that the British were the ones who adopted it. Nice. Who? Who? Who made it? What American? Lewis. But the thing that was crazy is that was actually developed in 1914, or excuse me, it was designed in 1911. So the same time as the fucking Colton handgun, the Browning, you know, the 1911.

It was designed by Samuel McLean and Isaac Newton Lewis, which God knows that man was going to be a scientist no matter what, an engineer. But yeah, it was adopted predominantly by the British, but the one that I have is an American. It was an American one in 30-06 instead of 303Brit. Oh, so that would be like one of the earlier models that was made. Am I correct in that? I think I'm not 100% sure because they did have some, obviously, Americans did produce them and field them to some degree. But I fucking love it.

Like, it's actually probably one of the most pleasant shooting light machine guns I've ever fired. It's got like a 47 round, you know, magazine, whatever. The entire thing, there's no spring in the magazine whatsoever. Is it just pressure just, it's entirely mechanical. So the entire, the functioning of the gun is what's advancing the magazine and rotating it. It's really cool. It's, belts are better, but that's cool. Is it a bit?

Yeah, no, I mean, objectively. For a machine gun, yes. Is it a bitch to load and unload because of that? Not really. Do you just open up the dinner plate essentially? It's totally exposed. If you flip it over, it's completely open. And then do you just drop the rounds in?

So the magazine is fixed. You open it up and then drop the rounds in and close the magazine. No, well, you flip it over. You can take the pan magazines out. And so you can have like four or five on your person and just shove them in. And just two pan magazines over your boobies. obligatory buh are you going to talk about how the british used to make d in it yeah actually so on the well on the maxim it was what really no i thought that was a thing with

the max the machine guns because it's water cool so much asbestos and shit in that i'm not saying nobody did it i'm just saying if they did they're dumb so yeah i'm confused water there's a thing water cooled machine guns you've got the big water sleeve around the barrel yep so it's like internet lore that the british because they fucking love tea so much would fire the machine gun a bunch and then use the hot water to make tea. Yes. Yes. I've heard that one.

That's what their teeth got like that. That in genetics. Yes. That and spending a few hundred years on a fucking island. On the Max machine gun, though, the one of the biggest reasons why they couldn't do that is I think it was arsenic. It was something that the paint that they were using. Maybe I'm getting asbestos and arsenic mixed up.

It was either the paint or something that they were using for the lining. Actually, it was arsenic in the water, which is why, again, not saying nobody didn't do it. Right. I'd almost, wouldn't they do that, though? At that time, they did not know about that. You have the same individuals, like the match picks, the match ladies. Arsenic for a long time. The match ladies?

Before red phosphorus, it was white phosphorus that used on matches, but when you were making them, part of the process was like lick, you would lick it. And that's why they would have cancer start forming in their jaws, and then it would just fall through. And it was a huge problem until red fosters. Came out. Let me get the exact. Yeah, licking red phosphorus is much better.

Oh, well, when you see how it was. They couldn't just get a damp rag and be like dip. Dip. Dip. There's all kinds of shit like that, though. I mean,

that's where the term Matt Hatter comes from. There was a irradiated material girls that were like doing watch hands and shit. Yeah, the tritium or whatever the fuck it was. What's the mad hatter thing? The term mad hatter comes from back in the day you would use Mercury to make those fancy top hats. Mm-hmm. And people that work.

in a hat factory were exposed to so much mercury for so long, they would literally go insane. And that's why the phrase Matt Hatter exists. Oh, that's cool. But for the Lewis machine gun. Oh, my God. Dear God. Yeah, that looks like. Yeah, so Rad phosphorus.

Who? What a-oh. Well, that smile is just a bunch of jagged teeth. It looks like somebody took a beer bottle and smashed it across their own face and then made it teeth. Match dress ladies. Just like someone I know. But funny enough, on the Lewis machine gun. that's actually not a problem

with the water or anything like that because the Lewis machine gun's air-cooled. Oh, okay. So there's no water in it. It's just like a weird, like it's like a radiator fin. It's bizarre. That's kind of cool, though.

It's really kind of neat. Did either use... That's where the term run and gun comes from. No, I'm just kidding. Did the British make it water-cooled? So you're thinking of like the early 1919s or the maxims or stuff like that where they did have that water-cooling shroud on it.

And the Lewis machine gun looks like it has a water-cooling shroud, but it's actually like a radiator like a heat heat fins i don't know it's hard to say when we went to um when me and ethan for film and habitually fat went to the air defense museum they had early browning 50 cows that were used for air defense between like world war one and world war two and they had a water cooling shroud on it's a heat sink literally a heat sink to this oh that's cool yeah sorry so the browning had this big water cooling shroud on it on like a tripod and then there's these boxes and hoses and some dude was sitting there cranking the box and it was cycling fresh water

through the water shroud on a 50 cal for air defense. I thought that was cool as shit. Dear God. Why did they take away the water cooling shrouds? At what point we're like, hey, this is not necessary. We can just keep air cooled and then do barrel swaps.

So barrel swaps came a little bit later because barrel swaps, I'm not going to say it's hard to do, but it's harder to do, right? And then you have to, you know, we've got all these barrels that you've got to provide and everything like that. So like the MG, for example, the MG 34, or excuse me, the MG 42, you've got like the very quick, like you just palm the side of the gun and then the barrel wedges out the side and you can easily drop it and then throw under the barrel and wedge it back in, your quick barrel change. That technology took a while because before you had a very fixed barrel on a lot of stuff like that.

Why do you say very fixed like that? Like was it like tact in place? like you didn't change the barrel like that was just a it wasn't like a like an ar-15 even where you could just like oh yeah you know you got a barrel extension whatever like it was I mean in retrospect it's just like it's almost like a manufacturing issue because then you have to manufacture shit with such good tolerances that you can actually have a modular gun as about like 1911s are all hand finished like you can't swap out parts all willy-nilly with 1911s because like that part was finished for that fucking gun so the manufacturing process has to be so advanced that we can't spit out a barrel or whatever within this narrow spec to be able to hot swap parts out. Because you run into a problem with headspace, where headspace, if you're off by, even just thousands of an inch, right? Anyone that's fired a fucking 50 cow, you know about headspace and timing anymore.

I know. They got rid of it. But even that, the ability to time your barrels on the M2 was fucking rat because John Moses Browning was a magic Mormon. you have like the guy just oh my god so much stuff in modern firearm technology is because of that one person like he was fucking fantastic i got to go to his museum and his little house yeah his first shop but like that that is something even the ability to time your barrel is something that's really fucking cool a lot of the early stuff did not have that because you're talking about if it's thousands of an inch off your gun explodes machine guns have a little bit looser tolerances on things like that but it'll still run like shit or just you know detonate and that's just never good yeah 50 cows, it was just like, I mean, you clunk, you probably, headspacing. No, no shit. He's a medic.

Medic. Oh, yeah. I wasn't sure in basic if they made you do that. No. I mean, I think there was like the one day where it's like, here's a saw, here's a 240, here's a 50 cal, shoot them. I mean, I've got to shoot saws in 240s just because those attached to the infantry, but like very rarely was anybody doing live fires with 50 cals. That makes sense. Those are.

And when they were, it was like we're getting the training to the infantry guys fucking. make sure this doesn't blow up in my face have the turn to get ready i kind of like the ability to just headspace and time the 50 like it's just kind of because you know what your gun likes like ours likes being screwed all the way in then three clicks out like my too yeah yeah yours does dude i was just about to bring that up i knew my headspace and time for our for our 50 because it was like it was literally all the way down and then three or four clicks out yeah and if it's running real dirty or something like that you can kind of manually adjust from there it's great during the firefight they jam a lot

fucking get the gun out Why are you headspacing your gun in a firefight? It fucks up mid-mission. Yeah. You're not just going to stop the 50. You want the 50. Right. But this is totally like news to me.

Why would you be re-headspacing your gun? No, because when you go out on mission, you might get it to run. Let's say you get it to run. Now you have to go out. Chances you might rip one round into the berm. That's about it. You're just doing it. Bop.

Okay, it's good. Then you go out. What? You can't. When you leave, especially when you're doing every day, you're going on patrols, cycles, you're not shooting the gun and doing tests every time because that is convoys of vehicles or at least a four vehicles minimum. That's all those rounds. You have to test each and every time, every day. I'm sorry.

I'm just, I'm still stuck on why the fuck you wouldn't at least want to function test your. You did. Your fit. One round's not. Dunk, dunk. Or you, maybe a quick three round burst. But let's say that you got lucky on those three rounds. Yeah. The only time that we would test fire our weapons is if we got done cleaning them.

Yep. And then like it was either we would prep it and go out there and do a test fire to make sure it worked or it was like you don't got enough time. So tomorrow morning it, you know, 04, you're up in the truck. Zero six. You're going and doing the mission. You're like, hey, we put this 240 or 50 cal together yesterday after cleaning it. So we got a test fire real quick. You go. Kachunk. Fuck. Kachunk. Fuck. Click. Don't, don't, don't, don't. Okay, cool. We're good to go. That's like, hi, my name is. My name is. Fuck. Fuck.

Fuck. Cachong. Slame a shady. John Moses Browning. Yeah. Yeah, you want to test a whole bunch. No shit. Mark 19 is anything.

Just, God, that's why, like, the thing that your entire Humvee's life depends on that you're just fucking sending it. One of my favorite videos is a lot of sending it. Is I think an American. in the early Russia-Ukraine war where his 50 goes down and he's like trying to beat it with a hammer to get it to go and the guy he's like, I need a fucking more rounds

no, that's what he ran out around just like, I need more 50 and the guy below him doesn't speak very good English because obviously they're in Ukraine and he just starts handing him 18-4s he's just like oh shit K-thoo! All right give me more ammo another 18-4 he's like well fuck

K-thug! Oh, a third one! Not what I asked for it, but it works. These are very good substitutions. Close enough. I have seen that exact fucking video. Yeah, war's fun. Oh, man.

I have not seen that video. Oh, it's fucking good, because he's clearly, like, he's, he's chune it up with the fucking M2. He's out of ammo. He's like, okay, I need more fucking cans of 50. We have none here. Take this. Da, ammo. Here is big ammo. It's number one big ammo for you. It's like

Baby Groot Just like bringing him random shit That wasn't what he asked for He's like 184 He's like No But

Well I think on that one Brandon You want to close this out Sure I'll be Cody for the day Thank you guys For watching The Unsubscribe podcast

I was joined today By Eli Double Tap Rich from Angry Comps Myself Brandon Herrera And Nick The Fat Electrician Say the word

We can't say Say the word We can't say No And out And out You know my