Unsubscribe Podcast - UK Police Arrested Me Over A YouTube Video - Count Dankula | Unsubscribe Podcast Ep 273

Episode Date: July 19, 2026

The legendary Scotsman has finally made it to Texas! 🇺🇸 Watch this episode ad-free and uncensored on Pepperbox! https://www.pepperbox.tv/joinunsubscribe WATCH THE AFTERSHOW & BTS ON PATREON! https://www.patreon.com/UnsubscribePodcast 👕 Merch & Shoes https://bunkerbranding.com/pages/unsubscribe-podcast 🔋 Energy Drinks https://drinkechelon.com P.O BOX: Unsubscribe Podcast 17503 La Cantera Pkwy Ste 104 Box 624 San Antonio TX 78257 ------------------------------ THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS! STOPBOX Get firearm security redesigned and save 10% off @StopBoxUSA with code UNSUBSCRIBE at https://stopboxusa.com/UNSUBSCRIBE #stopboxpod PONCHO OUTDOORS Get $10 off your first order at https://ponchooutdoors.com/UNSUB when you enter your email. CASH APP Download Cash App Today:https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/5u7gm6rr #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Cash App Green features, Savings, Direct deposit, Round ups, Overdraft coverage and Discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. FUM Head to https://www.tryfum.com/UNSUB and use promo code UNSUB to get your free gift with purchase, and start The Good Habit today! QUO Try QUO for free and get 20% off your first 6 months at https://www.quo.com/UNSUB ------------------------------ FOLLOW OUR SOCIALS! Unsubscribe Podcast https://www.instagram.com/unsubscribepodcast https://www.tiktok.com/@unsubscribepodcast https://x.com/unsubscribecast Eli Doubletap https://www.instagram.com/eli_doubletap/ https://x.com/Eli_Doubletap https://www.youtube.com/c/EliDoubletap Brandon Herrera https://www.youtube.com/@BrandonHerrera https://x.com/TheAKGuy https://www.instagram.com/realbrandonherrera Donut Operator https://www.youtube.com/@DonutOperator https://x.com/DonutOperator https://www.instagram.com/donutoperator The Fat Electrician https://www.youtube.com/@the_fat_electrician https://thefatelectrician.com/ https://www.instagram.com/the_fat_electrician https://www.tiktok.com/@the_fat_electrician ------------------------------ unsubscribe pod podcast episode ep unsub funny comedy military army comedian texas podcasts Chapters: 0:00 Welcome To Unsub! 6:02 Danula In DC 12:25 How Dankula Got Into YouTube 13:10 The Pug Story 21:31 Dankula’s Arrest 44:17 Trolling On Twitter & Justice Dankula 51:08 Mr Beast Jet Winner Gets Arrested 52:33 Hot Fuzz 55:18 Weird Scottish Laws 1:02:17 Funny Stories 1:08:50 Shooting & Gun Laws 1:15:43 Police Videos 1:19:32 Racing School 1:26:22 Dankula’s Content Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Yeah. And you're next to someone who committed premeditated murder. Welcome to Scotland. Say, Eli, he's racially ambiguous, Brandon. His hair is fucking fabulous. Dona, a dark talk disposition, and there's a fat electrician. Welcome to a unsubscribe. Three, two, one.

Mm. Killer Apple. Cody, do you want to start it? Hi, everyone. Welcome to the unsubscribe podcast. I'm joined today by Eli Double Tap. Caledacula. King Trout, myself, Donut Operator.

Thank you so much for being here. Okay, that's it. Thank you all. We hope you enjoyed the episode. Yeah, this is awesome. Smash that like button, subscribe. Don't forget to subscribe. What can they find yet?

We've thrown from Scott. just to do that bit. Now he's gone. Oh, we're serious. We don't want to interview you. My visa ran out 30 seconds ago. I'll have to leave. Dude, welcome to the States. How you, how you doing, buddy? You've been like the most requested guest for a minute now. Yeah. Yeah. I see it all the time and everyone. Like, I had people like yelling at me as I was like, I want to. I can't just, I've got kids. I can't just take off and like fuck off across the Atlantic. I don't know. Just put extra food in their Yeah, and everyone was like, why aren't you going on?

And I was like, it's not up to me. I'm like, why are you yelling at me? Oh, man, no, but it's great. It's great being back out, but I'm dying in this heat. What's crazy about this? I still have no idea what he's saying. Oh, yeah, subtitles. Turn those on.

Apparently, I'm the only one of us who understands a Scottish accent. That was good. That's good, because I've had it the entire time I've been here, like even trying to order food in restaurants, and they're just kind of like, ah, and everyone's constant. Like, no one can understand it. It's racist, actually. when you think about it.

White on white racism. We hate it. He tried to order a Coke at lunch and the waitress was so confused. I don't know. I think she thought I was seeing something very inappropriate. Sir, sorry, we can't give you a throbbing cock. I thought this was America.

It is a good. So the one thing is hot as shit. I didn't realize that we were an even hotter weather the other day. And then you text me. we're asking it's like oh fourth of july it's going to be outside i was like no yeah i see all that that shit and i was like it's not that hot out and then i forgot that's horrendous it's so so bad like i wanted to go sightseeing in dc and we got like an hour into it and my girlfriend collapsed oh shit yeah and she had to like sit down and i was like well it's just you know i'm not yet's

that important let's just go back to the hotel let's try and get you home alive we went to the brunch spot earlier and they they have fans and stuff there but it was still like super hot though. Yeah. This is actually I was expected it to be so much worse because it's Texas because the last time I was here it was extremely hot but it's actually cooler. Here than it is in D.C. It's in D.C.'s in a swamp. It's humid

as fuck in D. What's up? When the last time you were here? Last thing I was in the States was 2019 I think so it's been a while since I've been back. Yeah but I'm happy to be back. I made sure to come to Texas because I love Texas. We're glad to have you. We're so glad to have you.

It sucks Brandon's deploying right now. Yeah. Put up the deployment picture. Yeah, currently active duty in Jordan. He's invading Jordan. Yeah, he haloed in this morning. Let's just start that hole. He's like, God damn it, guys.

Dude, he finally got his combat deployment. I'm proud of our boy. Dude, soldiers are going to respect him even more now. It's crazy. Can we talk about that, DeLay? Yeah, we can talk about that. Okay, so the U.S.O hit up Brandon, and they said, do you want to come out and just like talk to some of the troops out in Georgia?

And so that's why we don't have Brandon right here, right now. He's just having a great time. Our boy. You know, in the Middle East. Dude, it was. In July. It was wild seeing, like, as I told Brandon, he was a colonel, a lieutenant colonel when I was deployed. And then I got a text from him, hey, am I going to be seeing you in Jordan on July 4th?

Like the soldiers already getting word over the chain of commanding. It was coming back to me. I was like, oh, I don't know, man. I'm like, fucking, we're trying to figure this out. Brandon stepped up, though. Brandon stepped up. Yeah, dude, he definitely stepped up. I've got people like, people who are in country right there right now who are like,

is Brandon here right now? Like, yeah, yeah. The bestest of times. Do we? And then what? We just got back from racing school. We're professional racist now. Professional racist?

What's your least favorite race? I don't know There's very, very many good reasons to hate quite a lot of them I'm not sure I don't know, I think it's this week as Mexicans because we don't because we don't have those back home We've got all the others so it's easy enough for me to hate those And I'm right, but you've got lots of Mexicans here

I haven't got to hate them in person before so this week it's Mexicans I met Formula One or NASCAR All right 80500 I know That's why he gets along quite fine with this. Is that instant like, oh, we're all best friends instantly. I'm one of those guys that it's like, I have black friends and I'm still racist.

Dude, we had a blast. So how, okay, you're back. You did, what was the first half of your American tour so far? I went to D.C. and it was purely, this was actually quite funny. It was a guy for the State Department just kind of like reached out to me and went, hey, do you want to come to a reception for the America 250 passport special because they're doing limited edition passports? And I was like, what a random thing like out of the blue? And I checked the guy out and he actually does work for the State Department.

And I just went to, you know what, fuck it. Fuck it. Like I'll go out there and I'll see a bunch of stuff. And when I got to the party, there was a bunch of other YouTubers there. And we were all like, what are you doing here? Never late. And then we basically realized that the guy we were talking to got put in charge. of the guest list for the event.

So he specifically invited all the YouTubers that he watches so that he could meet them all in person. When we were like, what are you doing here? And then he came up and we were like, you little motherfucker. And he's like, yeah, that's nice anyway. Selfie. You're probably wondering like, I'm going to

you all here. Yeah. It was that fucking funny though, but we didn't mind. There was an excuse to come back out to the States. But I went around Washington, D.C., and it's weird. Bro, you're a weird. Your suit, though? You looked fucking handsome though. I literally lost all my creatine water

wearing that suit. Yeah, I sweated it right out. And I've been like, you my girlfriend was like, you looked thinner. And I haven't even though I've eaten like fuck since I got here. And it's like, yeah, my suit was, my suit looked good, but I was dying in that fucking thing. You got to talk about the hat too. You mentioned off camera?

I really need to show that one, Carmaro. I was walking around D.C. with my hat on backwards, and I don't know if you could see it. But I've got like a semi-circle, like, burned into here. from like where the back of my hat was sitting. I don't know if you can see it now, but it's not noticeable. It's not noticeable now.

Right here. Not so much here. No, no. Show my bald head. Flashbang everyone. Yeah, a lot of people don't know I'm bald and they get surprised when they see it. No, I'm saying, well, I'm seeing it up close. He could grow out of full head of hair if he wanted to.

Oh, that's true. Thank you. I do actually have hair. I just shave it because I never cared about my hair. It's because I've got the Vegeta hair line and I've had it since I was like 18. So it's just shit. So I just shit. shave it off the V. Virginia.

Yeah, yeah. So you called Vigita since I was fucking young. Any monster? But you went to the event? I went to the event. Where was it in D.C.? It was at the White House? It was in the State Department button.

Like, it was actually in there. We were in what was the Ulysses S. Grant suite or whatever it was called. And I went in and then saw like a bunch of different people and everybody that I knew. I caught up with Jack Posobic. I haven't chatted to him in ages. And so we were hanging out and everything. And then Marco Rubio came in and like gave a speech. and everything as well.

What did he say to? I don't know if I'm allowed to talk about this. I was told there's a lot of things I'm not allowed to talk about. Did he sign paperwork or told? No, no, he just came out, no, they just... As long as you didn't sign anything, you're good. Did they show you the diagram to a nuclear submarine? I don't know, but when you're in the State Department of building,

you've got guys in suits telling you what you can and can't do. And everything, they did kind of came up and we're like, we know what you're like. And they went, like, no fucking around. I went, I'm not going to... This isn't like a solid. of a funny ha ha type of thing this is I get sent to Guantanamo get put on the first flight back banned from the country for life like I'll I'll play ball is fine and then later on that night

I get invited to the White House and did you go as well I did go how's checking in security fucking that was interesting as well maybe we're a big badge that said fn yeah on it and I went what does that mean and they were like foreign national and I was like but I hate foreigners Man but not Am I the problem? But that was pretty cool It was kind of weird Because I was going to rent

I saw the Washington Monument I saw like the Lincoln Memorial And it was really really weird Because over in Scotland All we get is like American TV That's like all we've ever had And everything Nobody watches Scottish TV

It's fucking terrible And so going around And seeing all these places That I'd only seen on TV As a kid was actually quite weird Like seeing it all And it's like I was standing in front The Lincoln Memorial

And I was like Oh fuck I'm actually standing here In front of it surrounded by Chinese people. Which is, which was fine. Oh my God, it's Abe Lincoln. Okay, take a photo now. He's so much taller than I thought he will be.

Hey, Mr. Scarsman, can you take photo? I was the whole family. Okay. Oh, I had a few people do that, and I do a thing, but I quickly switch it around, take a picture of myself, and then flick it back around. That's right.

See how long it is for they notice. There's a momentum. Take that back home. Dude, where in the White House? Did you guys go to it was a there was a building right next to I forget what it's called West wing I was a little tour it was the West Wing part I'm trying to I don't know what I'm allowed to talk about you talk about that like yeah there's just certain stuff the stuff he would have known if he's not allowed to the film we couldn't film in the downstairs or you know allowed to film in the basement of certain areas phone's taken off you immediately yeah yeah oh for you

yeah everybody had to put him in the lock up he's an FN I know I know I know And there was a guy, there was one of the guys I was talking to went, ask for locker 50. And I went, why? And he went, that's the one they found Hunter Biden's cocaine. And I was like, oh, okay. Fortunately, you can't choose. But totally would. What the guy?

I don't even know that. We got, show when you went, I know we just had extra, you had to have somebody with you at all times. Oh, yeah, you've got, yeah. Make sure you aren't stealing national security secrets for the nation of Ireland. The secret potato. One of our mortal enemies. Running guns to the raft.

You say that, but she's got family. They all have bloody family. It's dangerous dating an Irish girl because when you break up, you don't know what uncle. Every time you start your car, you're like, we've got a thing in Scotland, but it's like, but where any man living in the remote highlands, in Scotland with an Irish accent. He's hiding. He's been hiding since maybe

about the 80s. Unfortunately, he wasn't in jail, so the Good Friday Agreement doesn't include him. Holy shit. So, for the people that don't know, explain who you are and what kind of content you do. I know we all binge your shit. Start with birth. I'm just some fat

retard that just, this was like completely accidental. It was like... Are you? I wasn't even, like, I made a YouTube channel and I even called it something dumb that I always says to everybody like, Count Dankil is a dumb name and I'm like, yep, like, if I'd had known the channel was going to go places, so much better. But like, I was just making dumb videos for like me and my friends to like, we were just like shooting stupid videos in the woods of us like doing funny skits and everything and this wasn't supposed to go anywhere. We were just uploading them here for, oh, we'll look at this and 10 years and we'll laugh at it, stupid stuff we done when we were younger. And at the time, I was living with my girlfriend and she had a pet pug and she loved this dog. She loved the dog more than me and she would always talk about how cute and adorable and wonderful he is, even picking him up and shoving him in my face, going, look at his little face and I'm like, yeah, he looks like a fucking gremlin laugh.

Isn't he beautiful? I was like, his lungs are in his fucking ears. Would you mean he's beautiful? But like one day when she was out working, I was like, I was there at home with the dog and I went to give him a biscuit because I just give him biscuits all the time and he always lifted his paw to take a paw and shake a hand and I went oh that kind of looked like a little Nazi salute and I just kind of went my life boy or chase make a mustache appear on this I'm jumping that beat and just have a mustache grow right here I've not even get any hair like my name is peter Parker but I'm also Spider-Man this July we're faced with a threat

that can be anyone The world may have forgotten Peter Parker. I'm just a neighbor. Friendly neighbor. But he hasn't forgotten them. Sometimes Spider-Man has to do the hard thing. That's my responsibility. Talk to Banner?

I didn't know you could get that big. Spider-Man, brand new day. In theaters, July 31st. So, like, that's when I went, oh, this could be funny. I don't like if I do that, it will piss her off. It will be great. And, like, over the next five days,

I was giving him treats and giving him. biscuits and everything and every time I was sort of taking longer to teach his pot and he was holding the paw out waiting for me to take it and so every time I just did it longer and longer until it got to the point where I wasn't reaching for his pot and he was just lifting his paw and I was like great go time that operation Barbosa here we go but but basically he didn't do it every single time though he didn't do it every time and I went I don't want to do this in front of her and then the little fucker doesn't fucking do it and that's like five days completely wasted.

So I decided to like record like a collage of it. And I also taught him to get very, very excited when I said a certain phrase, which was gonna say it on you. Yeah, you can say. Yeah, love the First Amendment. Gas the Jews. It was.

Oh, it was. I also thought he was going to say Seekhiel. Yeah, I also. You got us off guard. Oh, really. I'm like, oh, he went with a different phrase. Oh no, but we immediately walked out. American jokes different.

Brandon, do you need not... One more time, you got this, buddy. Brandon, can you... Brandon, do you like... Almost there, bud. Brandon, where do you store your firearms? All over my house in every fucking crepus. Well, do I have the product for you, Nick Schum?

Here, hand it to me, Brandon, so I can show you. Brandon, this is Stopbox. Stop box. We love box. You're selling me. What's in the box? open it and find out. All right. Well, let's see if I can do this. Oh, wow. Look at that. Oh, it didn't stop you. Can I hide my goop in that? You can hide your goop in that,

Cody. Cody, do you know why I love this thing? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Bigots you don't have to use keys. Gun, not included. Cody, you've got multiple cats in your house, including Squirt, who's quite the scrapper. Would you want Squirt to have access to your firearms? No, he's violent. Well, then stop boxing. is the perfect product for you. No cats getting inside that. Or people without thumbs. Mmm, hmm.

The nice part is it is actually TSA compliant. I didn't actually know that part until a couple months ago. That is actually really cool. You just put a little lock through there. Exactly. When you check in a pistol or any gun, if there's a hole that lock can go through on whatever you're checking your gun in,

you have to put a lock through that. This has one hole, so you just need one lock easily accessible once you land on the ground. I know you're not normally a one hole kind of guy, but this is definitely an exception to the the rule. Never worry about tariffs because everything is sourced right here in the USA. Wait, what are tariffs? Like, I'm pretty sure I shot a few of them. For a limited time only, get 10% off your entire order if you use code unsubscribe checkout.

And right now, if you buy one stopbox, you're going to get another stopbox free. So that's 10% off, plus buy one, get one free when you use code unsub at checkout. That's stopbox.usA.com. Discover a better way to balance security and readiness with stopbox. Stopbox USA.coms. Use code unsubbsubbson. I taught him to think that that means treat. Like, so basically whenever I say it, he gets really excited he runs around the room. He's little tails wagon. He's so excited for finally getting rid of them.

Right, but basically he ends up. So ends up, I film a bunch of that. I sit them on the table looking at like Hitler videos, like playing on the computer and everything. And then I film it all together, edited it, put it on my YouTube channel, which she wasn't subscribed to, and I just showed it to my friends. They all thought it was hilarious. And then what me and my ex used to do is we would like have some nights where we would just sit and watch YouTube videos together. And then ended up, I was going to go on, I know it's really good video and put it on, but I was going to have my phone set up over there to like record the reaction.

It had been great. It had been funny. But ended up, it just didn't happen. Because we worked opposite shifts at the time, so it just didn't happen. And then a few weeks later, I was away to Iceland, like to go to a video game convention because I'm a fucking loser. but ended up. I have no idea who this was or how this fucking happened, right? But while I was

on the plane going to Iceland, someone had found the video buried somewhere. I'd been on YouTube for about a month. The algorithm. Yeah, I don't know how the hell they found it, but someone found it and then posted it to Reddit and it ended up on the front page of Reddit. And this was all happening on like the flight to Iceland.

Oh, you have no idea. This is like, and you're just in I'm that joke of a video I'd forgotten about it I'd forgotten about the video at that point like and any you were just doing something silly with your girlfriend that's all I was like no one I uploaded it in YouTube and I was like

I had literally eight subscribers all of them were my real life friends that I hung out with and everything right and I got to Iceland because I'm in a foreign country like I don't have signal in my phone because my phone doesn't work over there I went into the hotel

all my friends were with me because we all went together went out in Reykjavik we all got fucking wasted, went back to the hotel room and I passed out. The next morning I woke up, hung over as fuck. And then I was like, I looked at my phone to check my messages and I went, oh yeah, shit, no signal. And I was like drunkenly trying to, still drunk trying to get into the hotel Wi-Fi as soon as I connected to the Wi-Fi. Boom. My phone just exploded. You have 43 voicemails. And then eventually like, what was that feeling though? I was kind of like, what the fuck happened? Like, I was kind of like, was what's going on? And when, and then, uh, eventually, and then, uh, eventually, and

And I saw, I got the gist of it where it was like Nazi pug stuff and I went, what? I was like, how did people find that? And I was like, and then while I'm looking, I get a call for my ex and I just answered and I'm like, hello? And she's like, why are they journalists at the door? And I was kind of like, uh, like I'm still drunk for the night before I'm like trying to think. And everyone goes, all of this was overwhelming and that's when I gave like my first interview while I was still half drunk. was two. Journalists who were saying shit, like, oh, you've upset a lot of people. But we can tell you're a really nice guy. And we just think you should get your side of the story out. And I was

like, oh, you trusted the journalists. Yeah, I did. I know. That's a lesson of, you know, a lesson learned the hard way. And I did. I spoke to them and everything. And then they just wrote an absolute hit piece on me. And the problem was is I'm still in Iceland. This is my first day, like here. So I'm having to stay in this country the whole time while my life's just being burned down. How long were you in Iceland? I was in Iceland for just over a week. And I I think that was a... I picture you're just about to light your passwords. Like, we're...

I guess we live in Reykjavik now. It was that very same day. It was Eve online. I played a shit ton of Eve online and it was Eve online fan fest, right? And the very first day, the opening thing was the keynote speech to open the whole festival. It was delivered by Helmar Vigar, who was like the CEO of CCP games. So I'm sitting in the crowd just watching it and I see an email come through from my employer. And then I'd just go like that to my friends and I'm like,

and I'm like, I just got fired. But it was at like a call center job for like helping people repair their little money terminals and it was a shit job. I didn't really give a fuck about losing that job. What year was that? It was like 2017? 2016. 2016?

I remember seeing that and everyone was mad about it and I was like, that's kind of fucking funny, dude. Why would you be mad at that? Well, that's the thing is a lot of people. I kind of had the impression that I kind of had the impression that I'd pissed a lot of people off. I didn't realize a lot of people found it funny because I'm getting my messages for the media.

And 2016, that's going in that full swing if you made any joke. Gamergate was like the first thing that started it and then immediately after Gamergate was me and I get blamed for Gamergate sometimes and I'm like, I wasn't even on the fucking scene back then. Like, why am I getting blamed? But basically like I've got journalists reaching out to me

and everybody tried to talk to me and after that first hit piece I was like, I'm not speaking to them. I'm not talking to them at all anymore. So I just went out, carried on hanging around in Iceland, and people recognized me, and they were like, you're that guy. You're the Nazi pug guy. And I was like, that nickname sucks. Better than Count Dacula.

He re-inter his YouTube name. Yeah. He's a pug guy taken. Oh, man. I'm going to guess if I search a Nazi pug guy, he'll come up. But please continue. Be careful what you're Googling me. My balls are out there.

I was first like, yeah. I was first getting into like the. YouTube game at that time. Yeah. And we were sharing that and just laughing her asses off. Like, he didn't mean anything by it. It was just fucking hilarious. That was the thing.

I didn't. I was just like fucking around. Yeah. And everyone, but they were trying to, the media were trying to portray that I was some mega Nazi and I was trying to secretly instill my far right beliefs on people. I wouldn't have done that using a retarded ugly dog. Like, I could have done something so much better. And I'm like, it was blatant that I was just fucking around.

And I was getting blowback for people. getting hate online I got a few death threats but I got a bunch of messages of support and everything as well but then as we were coming back from Iceland like all my mates who were with me were going oh you better hope they're not like waiting for you when you get back home and I was like that's not gonna happen hmm I think and then I got home everyone was fine got through the airport everyone was all right went home was just chilling in my house because I had no job now and this was like three days after I got back and there was a knock at the door

and I just saw a man and a woman in suits with a little lanyard and they were like we are and I went to CID I know and then they came criminal investigations department so basically they're not standard police officers

of what you've done a little bit more severe like FBI they said not FBI I don't even think we have because you made a fucking joke yeah because I made a joke I did a dumb thing right

they went can we come in and I said yes right not realizing that I had just taking three bongs. And they came in and they were good, you know, props to my ex as soon as they walked in. She like grabbed the bong. She like grabbed the bong and whipped around to the kitchen and like hid it and other thing. And they came in. You did this?

Yeah. They shouldn't smell a thing. Oh, I farted. You know, sorry about that. My pet skunk. He's around here somewhere. It's the dog. A lot was about to be blamed on the dog this day. That little naughty fuck! They walk in. It's dressed as Hitler.

Oh man. But do you want to do you want to know the Don't know that is... The dog's walking out giving you commands? I just do what I'm told. Goose stepping down your old. Take him now. Take him away. A little fascist piece of shit.

But they basically went, I assume you know why we're here and I was like, yeah, I've got an idea. And then they were explaining it to me and they went, well, we're here to arrest you. And I just kind of, I didn't know what to say and I just went, okay. Like I had nothing else and I went, can I get changed first? I was like in my pajamas and everyone they went yeah that's fine but then when I was getting changed they have to send the male police officer to like watch you and to make sure I didn't have something hidden somewhere and so I got changed in front of him and well the male police officers watching me the female officers going around my flat taking pictures of like

everything I don't know what I'm taking but the problem is in my flat I used to do graffiti and I used to do a lot of tagging and I had a bunch of my tags on that board and they went in and took a picture of it and I went oh fuck I was like oh no I was like some guy was at a house party and did that and no idea who that was. That's the family Hitler shrine. Everyone has that. This guy comes over and he spray paints this tag. It's definitely not mine.

He just comes over here from time for time. He doesn't even know where he is. He breaks in. He leaves Kansas spray paint around too. Yeah. She's taking a picture and I walk in like, oh, who's done that? Who done that?

Oh my God. I just ate it there. My good wall. It's my favorite. But the thing that happened in the run up to this is there was a bunch of journalists that kept coming to the door and I was just open the door and going fuck off and like just telling them to go away. And we had a local gang of youths who used to hang around in the streets who I knew. And I went up to them and I went, if you see them, ask them very nicely to leave. I just went get them chased.

Just get them out the estate and they were like fine. So for a few days after it, nothing. No journalist, nothing. But then when the police handcuffed me and led me outside, as I'm being led outside, my neighbour pokes his head out, and he's pure like, oh, hi, Marcus. And I went, the Nazi pug video, and he was like, they're not arresting you for that.

And then his wife came out and started trying to yell at the cops. And everything, and he's like wrestling or back into the house. And I was like, don't, don't, don't, just do it. I'm handcuffed, like, just go back inside. It's fine, it's fine. And other than, but, like, they led me outside. And this is the thing is no journalist for days, right? and then when I get outside, tons of journalists.

All there to take my picture. That means there was a leak. They put it out. If the police have any kind of communication with journalists, there is supposed to be an official record made of exactly what was said, who was spoken to, blah, blah, blah. And my lawyer requested it, and they went, no such thing exists.

And I went, oh, they're psychic there. They just knew the exact dating time of my arrest. And I had people in the street tell me that the journalist pulled in with the police. They arrived with them. And everyone, so it was a perp walk. Like, they were trying to get a perp walk. and I came out the house looking like a fucking bog dweller. The picture's so good because I'm not at my best.

And it's like if you want to pull the picture up, it's great. I'm like, yeah, I'll look like an absolute gremlin. What's a bog dweller? You're about to see a Scottish or Irish man who lives in the dwell. Yeah, is that like what I would call a swamp donkey? Essentially, yeah. Okay, essentially. Did you go, did they take you to jail?

Yeah, I got taken down to the cells In Coatbridge Police Station What did I see? Again, what did the other people In the cells say? What does it? Oh, that's, that. That came later on, actually. It was like, yeah, that's the picture. Yeah, that's it. I'm laughing my fucking head off, obviously.

Because I'm like three bongs deep getting cutted out of that. Yeah. I love that picture. On what charges? This one, though, it's like Nazi dog propaganda. And then he's in the photo, but, man. Yeah. He's looking at that, thinking that he's a threat to society.

And yeah. Again, in 2017, I remember that picture now because I was sitting to my friends and we're like, what's he being arrested for? On what charges? To be fair, I deserve to get arrested for looking like that back then. I'll put you in your face going. That'll be blurry.

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with zero extra costs. Go to the Games tab and play FIFA World Cup Launch Edition now, only on Netflix. I'll bet, oh no. Wait, I just got another, okay. But, yeah, where are the official churches on that? It was a section one, two, 27 of the Communications Act 2003.

I think it's section two, posting grossly offensive media online. Oh, fuck off. With the intent to cause offense or fear or alarm. Oh, get the fuck out of here, man. Hart and feelings. Heart and feelings. It's still very illegal.

We're making more arrests on that, like thousands. Are you? Thousands, yeah. How about with what you say here versus there, can I do anything? I don't know if someone did actually get in trouble. This is kind of recent where it's like a guy got arrested and questioned

by British police because while he was on vacation in America he went shooting and posed with pictures with a bunch of guns posted them on his social media and then the police came and arrested him and interviewed him a bunch of times you haven't heard about that? No, I'm at the guy that'd reach out to me on Instagram

because I covered it and I didn't get back to him so if you're watching, sorry about that I was busy posting pictures with a gun I think like literally in America. What's their logic like that he took them home with him or? No, I have no idea what it was. Maybe they thought he was being threatening and harassing. It turned out the person that actually reported him

was an ex-client of his that owes him like a million pounds. So the guy was just basically doing a bunch of dodgy shit to get him arrested because he thinks he doesn't have to pay it back anymore if he's in prison. But basically I was laid out with the journalist and then I was taken down to Cochbridge Police Station. I was taken in and I was processed.

I was put into a single cell and I was just chilling in there all night. I asked for a book because one thing that you know, you've got a legal right to a book when you're in a cell. And they gave me, I think they gave me a book called Freedom by Reggie Cray. Irony. I was kind of like, you stalk that? I mean, okay.

The ex-gangsters book, all right. Did you request the book or you just request a book? They give you a book. And if the guy's feeling like being a prick, like he'll give you a book in a foreign language or something. So just be very, very nice to the screws. Calculus. Yeah.

I love this. Ended up. I was in the sales. The guy came in and had a chat with me. The guy was even like unlocking myself and coming in to just sit and hang out with me. because I think he saw what I was in for and was like, this guy is not dangerous. He had the screw. And they called screws?

I would call him the screws. But he came in and he says, here's what's going to happen. Because your crime has, usually we would just process you and let you go. And he went, but because your crime has the hate crime modifier, we are not allowed to let you leave and we have to keep you here until your trial. And he went, fortunately, it was the next day when I could get a hearing in front of your judge. God, America, that would have been months. Do they have bail in the UK?

No, it's up to the judge. We don't have a cash bail system. The judge just decides at the time whether or not you're getting out. Which is wild with the idea of just a joke or something can be... But it's causes hate crime. As soon as hate crime's on there,

then it's treated so fucking seriously. Are you innocent until proven guilty in the UK? No, no, no, no. Are you anywhere? The media decide that for you, well, I mean, same here, but... Oh yeah, the media prejudiced us to fuck out. my trial and just didn't get in trouble for it at all.

Yeah, I was in the cell and then during the night I was like trying to sleep and I just heard like screaming coming from out in the hall. Stop, hold on, there's a quick ad. This actually worked really good with my Metal Gear Solid shirt. Yo, poncho. Poncho, this pattern dog?

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And then I just care it's comfortable, a little bit of stretch, and then easy to take care of. But if you're breathable, dog, you win in. Poncho will have a size that will work for you. Now, how do these feel? Have you ever wrapped yourself in a cloud? Dudes, dude, just go to, go try one on. You just got to go try it on. Look.

the guys these have the pearl snaps and they always talk about the pearl snaps here one thing especially as a camera dude this this little guy this is the stuff that makes me happy when companies do because this it does clean your glasses your optics you know your glass whatever you need you have a micro towel fiber built in and phone phone goes right there gear up for summer with poncho go to poncho outdoors.com slash unsub and enter your email to get $10 off and free shipping up your first order. That's P-O-N-C-H-O-Outdoors.com slash unsub. Head there dropping your email and get $10 off plus free shipping. And I was like looking out the little porthole going like what the hell was going on and there was like

six officers with this guy and a Superman carry. like he was like tied up like sushi and they were dragging him down the hall and he's screaming and kicking and thrashing and then they just they logged him in the cell and obviously untied the shit and then just backed out and slammed the door. With you? No, no. Oh, I'm like Jesus.

I would have been like that. You're not bringing him and he let fuck up. He was in the cell that was next door to mine and the entire night he is like punching the walls screaming like kicking the door and he was shouting stuff like I've ruined my life I've ruined my life and I'm

hitting the door going, shut the fuck up. And there's other prisoners all screaming it as well. Eventually, he just ran out of steam and he like went to sleep. And the next morning when we were getting pulled out ourselves to get transported to court, I was like, who was that fucking roaster you put in the cell next to me last night? And then the screw

just went, oh, he killed his friend. And he's like, yeah, he stabbed him. And I was like, oh, okay, well, I'm making friends. Because I was threatening to kick his head in if he didn't shut up. And I'm like, shut the fuck up. So if I get, let me get this right, real quick. Hold on. You made a funny name.

And you're next to someone who committed premeditated murder. Yes. Oh, okay. Sorry. Now that we're on the right bad. Welcome to Scotland. But basically, we all get taken out. We're all handcuffed.

We're all ankle cuffed as well. And then we're getting led out to the prisoner transport truck. We're getting put into our little cubicles inside the truck. And while I'm getting, I'm a sitting handcuffed to the floor of the truck. And I see a friend in my side. like coming on to the truck, I'm not gonna say his name.

And I was like, oh, how you doing? And he's feeling like, oh, what's happening? Like, man, he's like, what they get you for? And other than he was like, quiet. And I'll tell you in a minute. And then we were sitting, he was in the cubicle just next to mine and we were shouting through the vents, like talking to each other. And he says that allegedly he opened someone's face with a meat cleaver.

And the guy needed something like 87 stitches or something like that. And then I didn't have to ask him if he'd done it. I know he did. Okay, so, allegedly, allegedly, allegedly. Let me get the straight again. Oh, no, he's already out. That's where I'm at. You had ag assault, aggravated assault to the left of you,

and you had premeditated murder to the right of you. Yeah. And you did a meme. A meme. He taught a dog a trick. Oh, okay. Like, I offended people, which is worse. Yeah.

Yeah, I offended people. Yeah, don't do that. That feeling. though, I would have been I can't explain it. I would feel like I was going crazy. Like, how the fuck am I here right now? This can't be real. This can't be real. That was

I guess like there's been there's been times it wasn't my first rodeo. I've been arrested a bunch of times like before. Ever for thought crimes? It's always, never for thought crimes. It's always John Drew's showing up. It's always been for like fighting Nazi citizens.

Zoom's in on the pog. I'm like, but I'm gonna put it, peps, like, yeah. Groop, gruyper, like, like, like, yeah. No, but it was, but it was like, there's been times where, like, I've been arrested, I've got any of a fight outside of a bar, and the police arrest me, and I'm like, yeah, fair.

Like, I go, I go, I'm guilty, yeah, I did it. Like, it's just, those times when I understand it, and I'm like, okay, I beat a guy up. Yeah, okay, I'm getting arrested, and I'm chill with it, like, I've never, I've never had any problems unless the officer's cheeky. And, I'm, but, uh, but basically, that this time I was sitting here going like,

nah, this is built. I didn't do shit. Like, why am I being arrested for this? And it was just like way over the top. Like, because usually they just process you and let you out the next morning when you've sobered up. Like that's it. You'll get a fine in the post. Yeah, like you're saying, you've been in a bar fight before. They process you out. You're done.

Yeah, and that was it. You get a fine. There's no, there's no enough time in the courts to prosecute every single fight that happens in Scotland. It just can't be done. Well, you got to tell the story after you talked to your buddy who allegedly hit somebody in the face with the clever about the guy who you were booked up with. Well, this is, this is

we all get through into the holding cell underneath the courthouse ready to go up and see the judge and so there's like, I think there was about like 12 of his like in this holding cell and a few of them weren't talking because you could tell they were going through withdrawal and everything there in the corner like shaking and jittering and everything so we just didn't really talk

to them. Train spotting is a documentary. Yeah, exactly, but they were going around the room going, what did you do? And then there was guys that were in for like violating their probation and everyone one guy got caught with like 300 Valium tablets another guy got caught growing weed and everything and then it like it got to my friend and he says allegedly I cut somebody's face open when I meet Cleaver then it got to me and I went I made a meme I was like of making my girlfriend's pug

doing a Nazi salute and like three of the guys in there went that was you and they all seen it and they were and like these were guys that were like seasoned criminals and they were like shocked. They were like, you get arrested for that. And I'm like, I went, well, obviously I'm here with you in the cell. And then there was another, there was a kid he looked about like 21 or something like that.

And the whole time, like he's obviously, he'd never been arrested before, so he's sitting on the floor in the corner where he's like, legs crossed back against the wall, like kind of nervous. And we all, so everyone turned and looked at him because it was his turn and he just went, see if it's your first defense, like, what will happen? And we're like, I chewed out by the judge.

like a fine like whatever like they'll probably just take you up to give you a fright and everything and then we said that's when we said oh it depends what did you do and then he went oh i got caught with a kilo of coke and everyone bust out laughing and we all went no you're fucked you are fucked like you are getting that we were like what's that seven minimum and then and when we're all laughing you just see the kids face like go white and he just like stairs at the floor and we're like, well maybe not, you know, if you've got a really good lawyer, but we're all looking at each other going, he's fucked. But ended up, we were in there for late hours and I ended up getting pulled out to like my public defender guy. And this was,

this was actually quite funny. I have to hand it to him. And I sat down across with him, and like through the glass and all that shit. And he was just like two seconds just while he'd done some paperwork. And then I sat there just in silence for like a minute. And then when he finished he looked up at me and went Shalom I'm immediately like like that and he went I'm not Jewish don't worry

I was like that was that was quite funny actually I shut myself Where my change went Yeah exactly Ah you're here for money Of course But ended up he went

He was like Connor guy Connor dying everything Oh Alex and glasses but he ended up he went I'm just going to go up and talk to the judge and I'm going to get you PF lib

which just means Procurator Fiscal Liberation he's going to go up and go look here's what he did, just fucking let him go and send him his letter so he went up, spoke to the judge and I'm sitting in the room with a bunch of guys who are looking at like seven years and eight years and everything

and then the guard came in and went April went Mark Makin PF Lib and I was like oh cool and I got up all happy and all the other guys were kind of like fucking dick because I just got to go home and I was like bye guys and just left

and then I get sent home you could have done a really funny bye you're like that's that's really going to annoy me and I'm like oh that's like when you're having an argument with someone and on the drive home you're like

a fuck I'm taking a shower that was one but ten years later Tell the story as if you did that. I did that. I definitely did that. Actually, yeah, totally. And when I left. And the whole jail clon.

I like this story way, man. Heart and criminals, tearing up. They changed their lives, then. Obama was there. her left. Oh, no, but I ended up, I got sent home, and

then I just had to sort of wait for my court date. And they started doing really, really sketchy stuff right off the bat, right off the bat, really sketchy stuff. Basically, my girlfriend at the time got sent a letter from the prosecution. Right. Yeah, this is the prosecutor's office and the police.

They sent her a letter basically saying, hey, you're going to appear as. a witness against him in court if you don't you'll be arrested yeah the what what they were they worded it in a very clever way where they weren't outright saying that because I immediately gave it to my lawyer and he read it and he went a fucking clever bastard he's like they are saying that without saying it like you didn't have the option to just not appear as a witness she had to appear but then but then after that I was broke I had no money like I had no money or anything so I applied for legal aid and this is the thing that was

just this was hilarious, right? We were living together, so we had a joint bank account for the bills, right? So basically we were then considered financially linked. And she had a lot of money from an inheritance that she got from a family member, but they inherited came with like the caveat of this is to be used for a deposit for a house.

You're not allowed to use this money for everything else. That was the condition of the will, which is fair. But they says, oh, because you're financially linked and she has all of that money, you're not eligible for legal aid. Fuck. And I had no money, I had no savings, nothing. I was like, I explained to them, I went, that's not my money, that's my girlfriend's money,

we're not married. And they were pug. Yeah, they were like, oh no, he's got a bunch of gold hidden in Argentina and stuff like that. A bunch of fine art. He's just waiting for it. He didn't all to Switzerland. He loved shoes. He had a big pile of shoes and high glasses.

Gold teeth. Yeah, the walks. Great news. The federal EV rebate is back. Eligible customers get up to $5,000 with the federal EVAP rebate on select 2027 volt and 2026 Equinox EV models. Visit your local Chevrolete dealer today for more details. So to paint a picture where you're at, you're like zero money for defense. Literally broke as fuck. No money. No money whatsoever. I wasn't making it anything on YouTube because of the because everything blew up, YouTube immediately demonetize my channel. which they do during

controversy like that so I had like zero income during that period at least you got some laughs yeah those are great for the bills I was going to say can't pay rent but do you want to hear a good job some people fucking hate it

help I'm stuck in the dryer so at this point you're worrying about your your upcoming court case right and you have no money for any kind of defense? No, none at all. But it was just annoying because they went, like the government basically decided, we're deciding that you're not close enough that we can force her to appear as a witness against you, but we're also deciding that you are close enough where you also don't get any money. Yeah, so that was what I had to deal with. Man, you got the government dick. Yeah, I did, yeah.

How far out was the, like the trial from when you were? Seven, seven months before my first appearance, I think and during that time I ended up I did do a go fund me to fund my initial costs for going through the trial and we actually managed to achieve our target which was actually really really good and I want a lot of people a lot of beers but I do that I don't know if I should say this on camera but is he anybody that comes up to me at the event and goes I donated to your thing I'm like you get a beer and I'm buying my beer because my way paying it back but now that I've said that I'm gonna get so many people going I don't need to do it

I donated eight times, so did all my friends. You only more than a beer. Show a receipt. Was it Reddit people that helped a lot with raising the money for the returns? It was actually everyone, that was the thing that was weird. There was even some people as well. And this is, I will always consider this

the fairest opinion of what happened to me where people said, I didn't like the joke. I thought the joke was offensive. I thought he was a bit of a piece of shit making that joke. I don't like him. I don't like the joke. But he should never have been arrested and never sent to like jail and shit like that over it. That's a totally fair opinion because I'm not asking people, I demand you find my joke funny. Like a man like that's a bit of yeah, can't do that. But I just want people to recognize that it was a joke and other than

but there were some people that were trying to say I was the second company Hitler. Yeah. You know that yeah. That 2016 to 2020, 2020 was just. Oh, it was great. Twitter was great during that time Trump got in. Like, Twitter was like, verdun. Man, like, yeah, you were just sitting there posting all this kinds of stuff, and then your comrades were falling all around you. Ban, ban, this account will longer exist.

I was going to bring. So everyone put one out for the police. Yeah. Before Musk bought it. I was going to bring up Justice Dankula. Oh, that was a fun time. I should have done it recently with the recent stuff that went on birthright citizenship.

I should have, I'm in America, so I didn't have time. But you actually sit down and shit post about that. Are you all familiar? Oh, but just at my Justice Dankil about that I did on Twitter. Right. Basically, after Roe v. Wade got overturned, right? I've done this a few times already, but none of them took off quite like it, is I would change my profile so that I looked like something else. It was...

It was... I pretended to be a member of the royal family. I pretended to be a Taliban insurgent. And after... I see you during the America pullout, I changed the Taliban insurgent, but I used Photoshop where it's my face, but it looks like... my face, but it looks legit. I changed my profile to just like random Arabic, like, like, letters. I ended every tweet with alom dole la and everything, right? And, everyone was raging about the America pullout. And I was saying, I was posting shit going,

thanks for all the new MRAPs. And everything, and it was Photoshop me with my new MRAP. And like, there was people who, like, a lot of Americans were getting fucking furious. But like, like, my American followers were going, no, don't. That's count dang. like I'm, shh, shh, sh, fuck up. So, eh, but the one that really, really took off was when Roe v. Wade got overturned, I changed my profile picture to her Photoshop of me as a Supreme Court Justice, and I changed my name

to Justice Dankula. But I started seriously posting at first, right? And I posted underneath Biden's tweet, and Biden was whinging about it, obviously. Well, sorry, no, whoever was running Biden's Twitter account was winger about it. The corpse of Biden. Yeah, and I, and I, fucking,

Five Nights at Freddy's as an entire fucking not five nights at Freddy's what's it? Ferris Bueller's the name of the one they've made the corpse around. Oh fuck. Pretending he's alive. Yeah. That's right. Your friends can't get out of lending you money now. Thanks to Cash App.

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ink brand visit cash dot app slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures weekend at Berlies that was it yeah you basically had an entire presidency of weekend at Berleys right he wasn't alive he wasn't aware of anything I was president like he had no idea but basically I replied under Ronnie Biden's tweets saying we were very careful in our decision, Mr. President, right? And then all the feminists seen that, right? And just everyone exploded over that tweet.

So I had thousands and thousands of people feel like all over the world replying to me thinking I was an actual Supreme Court Justice. And someone even posted a Google graph, like showing like Justice Dankula searches just going, woo, like that. People had to check. People were checking to see like, so everyone's bitching about a Supreme Court decision. can't even name a single one of the Supreme Court justices. And so loads of people thought I genuinely was the Supreme Court justice. And I started retweeting people and just taking the piss out of every single one of them. Like, well, I was like, damn, it's all hos versus mad up in here.

And everyone, right? And then everyone was like, how could you do this to women? And I went, how can you not just shut your legs? And everyone was like, women are entitled to healthcare. And I went, have you tried not being a whore? And it's like, I was like, babies are entitled to life, like, you know, and just, so basically, people believed, people genuinely believe that I was the Supreme Court Justice.

It was just, it was just his, it was his face photoshopped with, like, judges, robes on, and everybody was like, yep, I remember electing that guy. Obviously. People leaned on it, you see how the photo of them all together. People were, like, expertly photoshopping me into the pictures and posting them around. I hate Justice Dankula so much ever since he hit office. Oh, I know. I'm terrible.

Absolutely terrible, yeah. Are you your method acting for Twitter? It was great. That's why I love, oh God, that's why I love you so much, man. The absurdity that people will follow anything you see on social media. It's fucking awesome. It was just like, people did just believe it, though. I've even convinced people that I was a member of the royal family.

I never heard as well. I had my profile that I was like 50 third in line for the throne. And I also had the keeper of the royal hounds. and everything and there was some people I don't know what I was I call myself the Duke of Cumbernauld which is which is like this bit was accident when it worked so perfectly call myself the Duke of Cumbernauld because

of the way Twitter's like usernames worked it came up Duke of Cumb dot dot dot dot and I was I didn't even mean that that's perfect but this is going to be great and it was I did it when I did it when the Queen died as well and I said

everybody say a prayer for dearest grandmamma everyone right and some people on the British right unfollow me and they're like we're going to sit this one out thank man because you're starting to really piss me on and everyone it was just funny as hell and then I was doing what was it people were saying oh the royal family stole so much stuff from us and like all of our stuff is in your museums and I posted it's always sunny where they're dressed as like the British army going like oh

with someone's ancestors bad at war and I was like we won calm the fuck down, who cares? And Otman, but it was like, it's like, here, if you wanted to sell it to us for some glass beads, that's your fucking fucking, I'm like, fucking, I was like, you're just killing boomers.

Boomers don't know you're joking, that's so amazing. I'm sorry, I think it's yeah, you, you con does, I'm like, well, I'm sorry, I don't care if you're a fool on uga-buga caveman, like, if you signed away half a fucking continent for some glass beads, that is on fucking you, right? anyone that lives in a cave

could know that that is a fucking bad deal what the fuck are you thinking? That's such a true statement like I want all this for What have you? I've had that argument before about it was so dumb I was like oh they were caught No I'm sorry I'm sorry that's dumb

Like people knew trade back then I'll trade you two fish for like three goats No that's a bad deal I've had that argument about the The thing that comes up in America all the time with Native Americans is like they didn't understand the concept of land ownership.

Fucking wolves understand this is my shit and that's your shit. Dude, they spent tens of thousands of years fighting with each other. They understand. They didn't even understand that. They didn't understand the concept of fucking

they were just massacre. They were for the love of the game. They were at war just for whatever reason. Jesus, say. Oh, fuck me. Oh, I'm so glad you're here. Fuck.

Holy shit. Cheers, man. No, those. Cheers, man. He was like, oh, yeah. What were we even talking about the? Oh, fuck. All we talked is everything.

We did go over the Mr. Beast playing because of the drug, the one kilo guy, and then finding out how much that kid brought on. Yeah. To the, I actually. Oh, yeah. We were talking about that earlier. Damn it. It was $3.6 million worth of.

I apparently didn't know. I didn't know. Yeah, I had no idea. They snuck that. All right, so to have an estimate of a, that's about 60 packages. To preface this, Beli. A dude got a jet from Mr. from Mr. Bees.

Yeah. It was the everyone had to put a hand on it. And then the last person to remove their hand wins the jet. I believe that was the Mr. Bees challenge. And then he won it. And then. I guess he got called with a bunch of fucking dope. I haven't read it up much the past couple months,

but old boy had, he said he didn't know what was on there. And they, they said, oh, he had no wrongdoing in it. He didn't know. They got stopped at customs with

what appears to be about 1,200 kilos of something. I mean, $3.6 million, so yeah, probably. Damn, you got a lot of check on,

like, fucking last. Like, how do you not notice that? It's like piles and piles of... I know. It's even a stereotype brick old cocaine. That's what they look like. He didn't fucking notice.

Just black and wrap like that. I'm like, huh. Yeah, you're good. Just keep bringing in my life. Oh, you wrap your luggage and duct tape. Man, you guys love us. He's wild. He's really worried.

He's going to shit his pants. So he packs 37,000 pairs of underwear. He's really safe. What if I have diarrhea every day, five times a day? Tuesday in case. Now, the one story we stopped, Edgar Wright, with. Oh.

Hot Fuzz is actually based off of the last day. Hot Fuzz is one of my favorite movies. So we brought that, or I brought it up at lunch, talking about the scene where they're like translating, like, Northern English farmer speak back to regular English. And then you said, you know that's based on a true story, right? And I'm like, wait, save that. Yeah, yeah.

And I was like, do share. I don't know the full details because it did happen a while ago. Basically, there was a farmer who was just living out in the bunnies. And he was like a massive gun enthusiast. And he had shit tons of guns. Now guns, very, very illegal in Britain. Like, because we had a mass shooting in Dunblane, which was in Scotland. And they went, oh, let's just ban all the guns.

And everybody was fine with that. And now, about 20-something years later, we have no fucking human rights. But anyway, like none at all. and everyone what we're going to do write a fucking letter. Oh, he did letter. I'm going to use all caps. I'm going to use my red pen. Three exclamation points.

The UN response, we're really mad. We're really upset. You keep killing kids. If you keep doing that, we're going to turn up with our blue helmets and watch. But basically, basically the guy was like a gun that. You had guns for like World War II. He had a bunch of different things. I believe he had mortars and everything in there.

But he actually have a submarine mine? They didn't have the mine. I don't think he had the mine. And basically it just got to the point where the police found out about it turned up. And it was like a barn wall to wall just packed with firearms, like just hundreds and hundreds of firearms, machine guns, absolutely everything. Right. And he obviously, they all immediately got confiscated. The farmer got charged.

And I think the argument they tried to make in court was this like the guys had some of these for like five decades. Right, he's clearly not a maniac. He's not an armed criminal. He's clearly just an enthusiast. And I think he got off. I'm not sure I would need to double check. But that was, but that thing that happened in Hot Fuzz was based on that.

It was based on the truth. Yeah, when you originally... When Simon Frost, or Jesus Christ, Simon Pegg. Yeah, Pegg shows up. You're talking about when he shows up in the country and he's like, why do you have all this? And all the insane shit.

Yeah, he's like, I assume you have a license for this. And then it goes through the chain. He's like, I'd do for this one. and then they go into, yeah, they go into his armory or whatever. Well, when you said that originally, I thought you meant like the story of hot fuzz was based on a true story where there was a rural village where they all were murdering everybody.

No, I meant like the farmer, the farmer with all the guns and these barn. Well, what's the dude? I think you made a video about him. He, fuck, what was he doing? Albert Dreyden? Yes. Yeah. Tell the story, tell the story.

Right, this is some bullshit. Story time. Story time. I hate the council. I hate the local council. because they're done and they just try and control what you can do with your property. That's two people. There was a woman that there was a woman that built like a tall fence around her garden

because she lived in a bad neighborhood and her kids play in the garden and needles get flung in her garden. So she was like screw that and building a fence and they were like, oh, it causes a problem for drivers. So you have to take it down and they do shit like that all the time. Don't you have to like maintain the historical state of your, they don't care. If you ever need the council to do anything, they'll get back to you in about two years. Okay, what is the council? That's what I'm like now. It's just like the local council.

Yeah, if you want a park bench made, you have to file about 80 different forms, and then it takes about three years to approve. And then they finally install it, and it costs about 30 grand. It's the government-run HOA, essentially. That's what it sounds. Okay. But they were throwing, like, dirty needles into her property? Yeah, and they made her take a fence down.

And so basically, if you want, for example, if you want to build a shed that connects to the ground, you need to get permission from the council. So you want to knock a wall down in your house, even though you've got a mortgage. You own this house. You need to get permission from the council. Did they do anything about the people throwing the dirty needles over?

No, of course they fucking did. Oh, they were just mad at the one building of the place to keep that out. Yeah, that's what I don't know what it is. That's when they come down hard on you, if you try and do anything with your property. And the story with Albert Dryden is he bought a field. And there's a way you can get around it, which he was trying to do,

which I thought was kind of clever, is if you build something or do something to your property, and nobody noticed. sees it for seven years and not a single complaint's being made, then you immediately have a case of this clearly doesn't cause a problem. No one's complained about this in seven years, so they have to let you do it. So he built big dirt ridges around a house he was building in the middle of field and he was hoping to live in there for like years. Was he in England? England? Yeah. And he had his wee house all built completely by himself and everything and it was quite a nice looking little house. Someone he doesn't know who snitched on him. Right. And so the council came in saying you have to remove this. they took it to court and everything. Apparently there was an incident at one of the council meetings where a live chicken was thrown at someone.

Because one person had a fucking problem. One person snitched. Good God. And Albert was a little bit of an eccentric fellow, gun enthusiast, but his main thing was rockets. He used to build homemade rockets on his land and fire them up into this guy. Like model rockets?

No, like full big things full of petrol. They showed up on the RIF's radar. Oh, fuck. And so it caused a little bit of a panic and of them. So they basically came around and way. Not a subtle guy. No, not really. But basically it ended up getting to the around to the point where the council were saying,

we are going to come and demolish what you've built. You're like, you don't have permission to do it. We're coming to demolish it. He ignored it. He challenged it in court. The council then came with like bulldozers and diggers and everything to go in and like destroy his home. So he pulled out a Webley revolver.

And he basically, I think they were stuck. there as if you're not going to do shit. And then on camera, bang. Yeah, he just, he shot the reporter. I remember now. It was the councilman. He killed the councilman and then he was using it. He went around and started shooting some of the machinery to try and destroy the machinery. But he did hit a journalist in the arm as well.

And all of this is caught on camera. But ended up Albert Dreyden was, of course, arrested and he was charged with murder. He got released early on compassionate grounds because he'd suffered a stroke and he was on his way out anyway. And he died shortly after he was released. but the way I see it is that was his land that was his house he can do whatever the fuck he wants with it and it wasn't like he was doing anything that was annoying anybody it was just a big empty field and he just built a house on it

which is kind of the dream when you buy property this is crazy idea owning it said property oh well yeah you guys might be shocked to learn in the UK you correct me if I'm wrong strangers can walk across your your land

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Right to roam. Right to roam. Wait, that's a thing? Yeah, so strangers can just wander. through like your property. If you own a big fuck off field, strangers can just walk through it. And you have to

make sure it's safe for them to walk through. Because there was a case in Northern Ireland. This guy had a big fucking hole in like the middle of his field and somebody was just walking through his field on his property, fell in, broke their leg

and sued the guy and won. Because he was injured. Do you want to hear something that's going to make all of that even better? Yes. Well, no, but yes. We've just repealed the vagrancy act, which means if you're homeless, they're not allowed to move you on, which means you could go out into one of those fields

and camp as long as you want. And however, however, we have a problem with a certain subset of people. Jipos! No, it is gypsies. They literally just invade a field and just claim it. They just stay there. And basically, everywhere they go crime spikes in the area and everybody hates them and it's gone to...

What? Dude, it's crazy watching Docs on it. Like, dogs will... They have rules for hardware stores when they come into or a gypsy camp comes in. Hardware stores will like, oh, hey. What are we calling Pikes? Pikes, yeah. They lock them down. They're like, nope, you do not sell to anyone.

I think shows the one that told that story. She's like, yeah, they change everything. This fucking fucking British guy, I know, I know got the front door stolen off his house. Connor, what are you doing? I'm a fuming, brother. You fuming okay? You ain't never seen nobody cheap a fume like this boy can. Fume responsibly.

Look at Connor. I'm cured. From what? My oral fixation. I would have something else in my mouth right now, but thanks to fume, it's not made of human flesh. Can I have that, please? You want to hit my fume, bro?

I do. Let me pass it. It's also got a fidget movement on it. For those who are tactically challenged. Made that shit up. Tactilically is a rare, often non-standard adverb of the form. used to describe interacting with or understanding something through the sense of touch, physical feel, or haptic feedback. P-you. Pass me my fume, bro. We're fuming it up. Dude, look at how fucking cool he looks. He's getting fumed out of his mind.

I'm not to fume too much, bro. My favorite flavor is orange vanilla because it tastes like somebody near you at a coffee shop ordered an Earl gray tea. Chris Mint. Yeah, one time I was really, really fiending for something, something I leave. I legally cannot say in this advertisement, but instead, I reached for my fume and boy-oh. Oh, did that hit the spot? Use code unsub to get a free gift with your journey pack. Fume has already helped over 700,000 people take steps towards better habits, and now it's your turn. Head to tryfume.com, that's T-R-Y-F-U-M dot com. Use code unsub to get a free gift today.

Oh yeah. I know people who've had their cars just stolen and everything in any of the other. and everything and then he looks down the road at the field and it's sitting. Yeah, in the field and when you phone the police and he's like, there's my car, I can see it. Oh, well, we need to get a rip for the high court and then that's going to take us about six months and I can see my car. It's there, look, and then they wouldn't go in and get his car because the police are also scared of them as well.

And they don't do a thing about them and the problem is with that act now. That means they can camp wherever the hell they want. It means homeless people could just move into your bit of land, camp out in ten. you're not allowed to move them on. Seattle did the same thing. That's right. And they, Seattle hated that.

Like, it was, oh, let's help and do this. And then they started showing up in the rich neighborhoods and just parking their abandoned cars. Like,

they would just drag their car there, park it, and then live in that or RVs that are beat down but in nice neighborhoods. Oh, you got to see that wall change. They're like,

hmm, maybe just not in this area. Wait, no, it affects us. Ew. I'm sorry you're 16. year old daughter was stabbed several times with a needle by a retarded cannibal, but we can't move them away

because that may be a bit mean. I'm a heart. Can't believe you're so awful. It's racist. The meme of like moving towards a perfect society, but you have to be considered slightly mean. We're just letting everything ride the way. What was it to say?

He says there's two ways out of this. One of them is like rivers of blood in billions dead. the other is being a little bit mean in telling women no. I remember this one time I was a, I was being driven home. There was a Muslim Uber driver and I was drunken in the front seat because I felt talkative and I was sitting chat away to him. And he was sitting there going, women should not be judges. And I was quick, all right.

Go on, show her, brother. Keep going and he turned around and he says, because a woman is on her blood. You know her blood? And I went, are period. Yes. oh man and he was like and he went

if you are in court and you're in front of female judge and she on her blood five years turns into 10 years I was like that's true

that actually is true five 10 dollars but you don't want to do that during your trial though but I said before you read this sentence are you on the blog like fucking last because now it's now it's 15 years because women love that when there'll be a wee bit up at you and you go are you on your

oh yeah they love that you see me a big grumpin what's wrong stop over react to all of great in relationships i said that to a woman on a date and it was it was it was speed dating and the first thing she said when i sat down and she was like i'm a vegan and i was like oh this is going to be great and she yelled at me a lot during the date and then i said calm calm down madam like that and I said you're being a bit hysterical and she started screaming at me. And everyone else who's speed dating is kind of like watching. And then the women that was arranging it had to come over to us and go, is everything okay?

I was like, no, she's yelling at me. I think the best thing. The best thing to tell a woman is you're acting like your mother. Oh, dude. They love that. Works every time. I did that once. Same.

Once. I, yeah. I was getting bitched at. And I said, Okay, Lisa. And I did not live that down for about four years. My skin stood. The hairs raised as I felt eyes penetrating my son.

The other one, it was like equal opposite. What was her name? Your sister wouldn't mind. Jesus Christ. She was in the office and she was in, fuck, Parks and Rec. shit, I can't remember her name. Rashida Jones.

I walked in and my girlfriend was sitting on the couch watching Parks and Rec, and I walked in just no thoughts in my head. And I looked at the TV and I went, hmm, Rashida Jones. That was a very bad thing to say. Never lit that down. So every time she came up in a movie, he was like, mm, Rashida Jones.

At least you caught yourself like in this image. Yeah, fuck that one up. I could remember, but I'll tell you. I was, I can remember this, I was like seven or some shit, and I can remember my mum just exploding at my dad in like a fury like I've never seen her have before. We were sitting there and we're watching TV. They're on the couch like behind me and I'm sitting like cross-legged on the floor like watching TV. My dad's like sitting on the couch where like the beer can like resting on his stomach like that. And there was a TV presenter that was on the telly and he'd just recently been charged with like beating his like wife or something like that.

And my mum was like, oh, I don't like him. No, I don't like him ever since it came out. he was hitting his missies, I don't like him. And my dad went, it was one punch. My mom just, and I remember being seven and I know that when voices get raised, I'm like, I'm going to, I'm going to outside for a while.

Oh, it's a hell to hate. I'm going to go play some Donkey Kong 64. Playground really took it out of me today. My dad's like, my dad's like a weird guy where like, he's not funny. He's not a funny guy at all. but just once a year he just hits out with something. Just get a banger.

A sublime that just puts everybody on their ass. A recent one we had that was kind of weird was we had the police at the door and a part of me was like, oh not again, right? But they came at the door and they were asking for my mum and they were going are you, fuck of my name, Amy. Are you Amy Meekin? My mum went, yeah. And she went in your son's Mark Meekin and she was like, yeah and he went

we're really, really sorry to tell you her brother's passed away and my mum was like, oh fuck, like that, and everything right. Turned out, totally different guy. Yeah, and it was like, make up a name, Reginald Meekin's, Reginald Meekin's, right? Wait, wait, Reginaldn, who the fuck's that?

My brother's name is X, Y, Z, and he went, but you're, this and they confirmed it all, same birthday, same everything, but it turned out the guy was from a fishing village up north. It turns out he does have a sister with my mum's name and the same date of birth and everything. Oh, that's wild.

The police eventually found him, right? but he turned out he had an accident where he fell out of his boat and he drowned and everyone because he was like an older guy and he couldn't get back in the boat and he just drowned and they went oh we're very sorry about that and then my mum went oh well that's no my brother my dad went what's happening with the boat that's my boat yeah that's oh oh oh my name is fucking bro. You're leaving inheritance?

Free boat, man. Hell yeah. Yeah, fucking go on, Reggie. So, what, now that you're back, what are some of the stuff you want to do

while your state side for the next few days in T-Hoss and celebrating again, America's 250, which is fucking dope. Thank you for coming on that birthday. If it was a 4th of July to come to, it was this one,

definitely, and I wanted to do it in Texas because, well, obviously. We'll be blowing off fireworks tonight I want to shoot Yeah I want to shoot when I'm here

I always have to shoot Every time I come here We got one or two of those You can find some fireworks Yeah Yeah we got fireworks We'll get everything today We'll have a good old

America birthday with you Oh hell yeah That's the part I'm excited about It just makes me feel sad though But you know You need to get your training for the bigaloo in somewhere Well again it

What's your favorite kind of firearms You're like video game nerd Anime nerd Nerd? Do I know the thing that's real the last time I actually went properly shooting, the guy went like, oh, do you know what to do? And I went, hold on, I'll see if I can figure it out.

I actually knew just from video games. I was actually kind of like, oh shit. I actually do know what I'm doing, which was pretty fun. But I did like that because that's the only time I've like pulled rank when I've tried to use my clout to like get some. Because I was a tourist, I wasn't only to shoot any of the rifles. I was to shoot like handguns only and everything. Which is wild.

Yeah, but the guy recognized me and he was like, why the fuck are you in my dad's store? I was purely, I was hoping to shoot some of the guns, but, oh, I'm not allowed to shoot the rifles. And that's when he went, oh, fuck that, that's right. That man, and he went, what do you want? I was like, what do you recommend? Man, I ended up a shot, I shot a Scar H.

And I actually quite enjoyed that. Actually, that was fun. Get all heavy scar? Yeah, that was actually pretty good. That was the one where I started loading it up in of them. I went, holy fuck, I actually know exactly what to do. And everyone, thank you. Thanks, PubG.

But no, that was really, really fun. I do like the shooting. I have to do that every time I come here. Which one, what kind of firearms are your favorite? Or do you have any? You're just like, no. That's the problem. Yeah, just guns, T.M.

Like, that's it. It's just like, I don't know enough about them because I don't get to experience them enough in Britain. We do have shooting clubs, but in order to get a license to actually own any of the firearms, you have to never even so much as breathed near a police officer your entire life. Like, I remember I actually applied to get a permit for an air rifle

because I liked going rabbiting. Because I like, yeah, you have to get a permit for an air rifle, because some idiot. A BB gun? Yeah, but they're like a rifle. Like, hell it once. Yeah. It's a one in the garage right now.

And my permit got denied because when I was 17, I got caught drinking in the street. And I was, that confused me because I went, so none of the other shit. None of the fighting that are like the Nazi pug thing. It was that. That's what done it that stopped me for getting an air rifle. That's what made you want to say. Yeah, exactly. Were you ever convicted of anything?

From, from the dog stuff? No, most of the stuff. And it was like, other times is this is the thing that's weird with Scottish court is I would get into a fight. And then it's like, oh, well, a bunch of shit happened. We've got witnesses. And what would happen is two years later, there would be my court date. And the witnesses are gone. They don't get a fuck about that shit anymore. So they just don't turn up. And the judge just goes, everybody go home, charges dropped. That happens so fucking much, by the way, so much. Yeah, because it takes that long for things to actually go to court. That's kind of, well, like, mutual combat. Yeah. Because it will, even, like, Indiana isn't a mutual combat state where I'm from. Because it's, yeah. state by state, but like we'd get in fist fights at bars and shit. And then the cops would separate you and then ask you, so you know, you're fucking up another guy or whatever and they go, do you want to press charges? And you go, no. Well, they'd ask. They'd be like, uh, the other guy's not pressing charges. Do you want to press charges? Like, no. And then they're like, okay, well then just fuck off. I think that's the way it should be over there. We've got

like, see if I go up to someone and challenge him to a fight and he says no and then I hit him anyway, that's assault. Yeah. But see if we say, let's go and he goes, let's go and we start fighting the police class that as a stand-up fight. They call it a stand-up fight in a legal term, but it's still illegal. So basically, there's been loads of times where sometimes they'll break you up and they will just go, right, you walk that way

and you walk that way, and that's when the officers are going, we don't want the paperwork, just fuck off, like, just leave. Don't go back to the bar, yeah. Or you get arrested to keep you till the next morning, you're encouraged not to say they're like, let's just not take this farther. He's both had a bit of fun, fuck off home. And that's usually when you see the other guy outside

the station and you're sheepishly like, oh, right. And another one, because it's, yeah, let's just be cool. It's fine. But yeah, that's the thing that's funny is that there is huge fight in culture in Scotland, but there isn't enough time in the courts to prosecute every single one of them. So you usually just get sobered up the next morning. You get a letter in the mail saying,

you've been fined 150 quid for breach of the piece, but if you pay the fine, it doesn't appear in your records, you're fine. I think violence is like assaults the one, or batteries, the one we don't want to fuck with because guns instantly gone with that. one so that's weird yeah yeah you don't like if you don't depending if they do press charges like random person like they did hurt me I'm press the charges it's like all your gun rights are gone instantly it's it's it's really up in there in the United States too it's like yeah especially if you get a battery recharge you get a felony you lose your guns domestic violence is

but immediate no I I have gone up to a bar fight before and like two dudes are beating the fuck out of each other and I'm like hey you good you good Everyone happy? Okay, cool. You got a bar fight, right? I'm not arresting anyone. Do you want to go into Cuffs tonight? No, no.

Okay, everyone go home. Whereas if I charge, you know, charge one of them with it, they would get a fucking, possibly a felony if anyone wanted to go with that, and they'd lose their guns forever. And voting. You're class defunity. Yeah, voting fucking. Dude, they got, like, gun laws are weird because I was lucky when I got pulled over

with all the, like, shit ton of guns. in the back of my car and then I had my pistol in my seat and a shirt was over it. Cop walks up, he sees a fucking armory behind. And he's like, oh, and he's like, oh, Eli, hey. I was like, hey, duh, da, here, license is it cool. I was like, hey, I'm going to reach in and get my insurance or whatever in the glove box. But there is a pistol just right there. So just so you know, he's like, oh, can I clear it?

I was like, yeah, lifted the shirt. He grabbed it. Couldn't rack it. I racked it for him, cleared it, handed it back. I was like, there. He ran it, came back. He's like, okay, I'm going to let you go. but just so you know, put that gun in the actual glove box or in the center console.

Okay. Because what you did was a, I concealed it. And he's like, that was a fucking felony. He's like, if I was a dickhead cop, I could have arrested you. Exactly. Exactly. That's where officer discretion comes in. Like, cops don't have to fuck you on everything.

If you deserve it, yeah, fuck them on everything. But you don't have to fuck everyone and everything. Yeah, because I had kind of the equal opposite of that where I, like, pulled over and I was speeding. Well, allegedly, I was speeding. Had hands on the wheel, had that conversation with the officer and he was like, you know, license, proof of insurance. And I was like, my license is in, you know, my wallet in my back pocket.

I'm going to reach for it. I go, proof of insurance and registration is in the glove box and there is a loaded pistol in there. And he was like, okay, are you okay if I go over and unload the pistol? Absolutely. So he came around to the passenger side, open the glove box, glock falls out. sets it down and then he was like all right cool you know grab grab your registration whatever perfectly fine interaction and then at the end of it and he goes by the way you know i put magazine here pistols there back where i put it drive away done as it should be a lot of it goes

down to officer discretion you you don't have to fucking hit everyone for every tiny thing that happens the thing that just happened i did want to ask you about did you watch the Canadian police with the shooting you know that moment when you text your team and say, did anybody follow up with that guy? What, Ethan? Who? Habitual. Who? We call him mud flaps. Meanwhile, the customer has already moved on, gotten married, started a new business, fucking retired. They let us say fuck in the ad, by the way. That's why today's episode is brought to you by Quo.

The business phone system built so you never miss a call. Did you know all your calls, text and voicemail can live in one single place? You mean to tell me they're inside the phone? Get them out of my phone! Stop, Connor. With Quo, you don't have to break that phone. But the point is, anyone on your team can just pick up the conversation where you left off. So I don't have to get the calls out of my phone? All the people who called you were just stuck in purgatory forever inside of Conner's phone.

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Try Quo for free. Plus, hit 20% off your first six months when you go to Quo.com slash unsub. That's QU-O. dot com slash you andsub thank you to quo back to the shitty content oh the girl cop the phoed yeah was this the one where a one bystand that was killed right outside of porn hub headquarters and it turned out it was a rabbi yes yeah he was coming out i don't know why a rabbi was coming out of porn hub headquarters was that no one knows why that was really weird and then it's a female who knows what's happening yeah what was it was it somehow

how you used to say he goes like if you ever get pulled over by a female cop prey prey that's how like it heyzer taser taser oh yeah I remember that she says she says that's not your taser darling she killed a guy I don't know I've only been preaching the past like what how many years have we been doing this podcast Eli it's been like six years seven years something like that the better trained you are the better you are and not killing people And so if someone runs up on you and you're a well-trained police officer, you're not going to smoke them in the face.

No, I want to turn and shoot the... We didn't do that too often. I was like, ah! Oh, shit, ah! Oh, shit. Be like, even not as a trained combat veteran like you are. Like, if you've been trained as a police officer, we don't... You know, if someone ran up on you when you're an active shooter situation, even Iraq,

you wouldn't turn and just shoot. We weren't allowed to fuck unless they were shooting at it. They could point guns at us unless they actually shot. First is the only time we could return to fire. So you could be driving down the street and somebody just. Oh, yeah, dude, that was one of the big, yeah, you're not allowed to do shit. So it depends on your Rory for each specific thing. That's why when we went to the Diyala River province and they were like, hey, if they're up filming you, you're going to engage them.

We're like, oh, this is a real bad area. That's how we knew it was a very bad area. And then driving up there, it looked like the moon. It was just like craters on the freeway from IED blast. But yeah, when we initially got into East Rashid, it was, hey, you can't fire. They can aim at you, can't fire. If they do shoot at them, then shoot back. So.

That sounds like letting them cheat. Yeah, but then you have a whole bunch of soldiers pointing guns at you. And yeah, it's fine. I will, to be fair, they had that and you guys had like fucking boathogs. So. At the same time. this this this girl is put into a position where she was in a firefight she'd never been put into a firefighter put into a high stress situation before because Canada no one's given her that training

before yeah and so because she was putting in that situation she turned and shot but like she's never had any any hard situations put in front of her life that and like no hard training no fucking firefights or anything like that. That's, you're just thrown into a terrible situation and you're just going to be like, when you take a little girl and you put them in there and you're just like, hey, everyone's nice, everyone's happy. And they're putting in that, what are they going to do? They're going to fucking shoot that.

Anyway, anyway, fix the macho. She must have watched a bug video. That's why the, God damn it, I've been preaching it for years. The more training you give cops, that's, that's, that they're, going to be good at it. They're going to kill less people. Defund the police. Acab. Yeah, yeah. And then that's what's happening right now. And Canada,

especially in that situation, you defund the police, you take their fucking training away. They don't know how to handle high stress situations. If you make them more dangerous, the less chance they are of killing people. You'll love this story. Day

two of race school, maybe day one. It was day one, end of day one. The instructors talking to all of us. Every one of us. Racist school? Racist school. We're professional racist.

Skip Barber. Also, fucking Skip Barber, you all killed it. Shouts out Skip Barbes. Skippy Barbes, we love you. Don't pass the instructor. One rule. And they hammered this one rule. It was the pace car, yeah.

Don't pass the pace car. Hey, you're just going to follow him. Don't pass the pace car. He asked in the classroom, he goes, when do you ever pass the pace car? Never. And he, this is, like one of the few things he like really

reiterates and then the one person just fucking we're in line like driving the one you said one person the one woman the one woman it was it was 60 men and one woman and guess who broke the fucking

rule. I'm like I'm in the formula I'm like oh oh no and I thought it was someone from our group I was like who the fuck just blew by the I swear they said it. Like they reiterated and everyone heard it multiple times.

Nope. The first left they take it's they were like Toyota's. They're not Camry's but what's the other one? Like the family model sedan. Yeah. Carolla. Yeah. And so they take you around just so you get a feel for the track.

They drive the racing line. You just follow them. Everybody's in a line. It's like you're just getting an idea for where you go to the track. And then they pull off and they pit and they wave you by. And then everybody like, takes off for their lap. They stress that 50 fucking times before we go out.

The first time we're on the track, she must have had some fucking itch. By turn two, dog. We take off and she just blows by immediate flag. They're like, days ruined. Everybody pull over. She got her ass chewed out. And she's like, I feel so embarrassed.

And we're like, good, you should. How did you miss the one thing? They told us one rule. 80 fucking times. Also, sitting in 120 or 110 with 145 was the track temp, right? Yeah. Well, yeah, the heat index was crazy because the humidity there was. And formula cars, I know you think comfort, right?

Yes, of course. It's a carbon fiber fucking coffin. And the sun is right here and said carbon fiber coffin and you're wrapped in flame retardant. Yeah. And your flame retardant suit with a helmet on the, yeah, the fucking bruises because they'll get slammed around in that car. Dude, they beat the, like. The only car they put me in that was long enough for me was clearly built for somebody who weighs twice as much as me because I'm skinny as fuck. So, tall guy car, but I'm skinny.

So I'm cinch down, down to the seat in the six point harness, but left to right, it was full mobility. So anytime I turn right, I'm like, slam. Turn left. Slam. So I'm bruised a fucking shit. And then, yeah, that car ended up blowing up. The first one that I was in, the tall guy car. And they decided to put me in Eli's car, which we have the biggest height differential

between anybody who was there. Yeah. Why they chose that, I don't know. You're like, you have me and Matt Frazier, you'd be like, oh, these two would probably go in the same car. They're like, no. About the same height. These two.

Gigantor. The fucking gangly slender man in the jacked short guy. They put me in his car. Well, they checked me for the fit. And I could hit the clutch and I could hit the gas. Well, the brake obviously is in the middle where the steering wheel is. And so they're like, can you hit the pedals? I'm like, yeah, everything's fine.

We take off or I take off in that short car, which my knees are like bunched up. and I'm driving. And then I went to shift because you drive with your right foot on the gas or throttle, left foot on the brake. Clutches over here. When I went to move my left foot to the brake, now I'm in the steering wheel. So I had to curve my foot to the side and use the side of my foot to hit the brake. So it was fun-sized go-carts. I felt like fucking Donkey Kong driving in that fucking go.

Oh, it was a blast. Everyone just got more hype than more hype than shit-talking and just, fucking good-ass time. Good-ass time. Hot as fuck. Yeah, I cannot stress that. That was the most miserable time. We were like, oh, we're going to do a podcast after every, at the end of the day. Fucking,

dude. You're like, we just drive to town, eat, come back, pass out. The one restaurant, because it was in butt-fuck, Virginia. So the only restaurant was a Texas roadhouse. Packed on a Tuesday was they did not matter. Like, there's a fucking line

out the door in this small-ass town. And you're like, Cool, man. Yeah, went there three nights in a row. Fucking eating like kings, dog. Well, they kept having us getting the, uh, getting the cars. They were very like punctual or trying to be punctual about that. But then we learn love you guys. Love you, Skip Barber Racing School.

Love you so much. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Uh, they kept pulling us out on, on day one, we would stay on the side of the track. And they're like, get in the cars. And we'd hop in, sweating our fucking dicks off. It'd be like 15 minutes. Then we'd take off.

So day two, we learned our lesson. There was an air-conditioned building very close by. We'd hang out in the air-conditioning. It was very chill. And they started getting frustrated with the fact that they had to call us out. And then we, so day two, we'd go out. And they're like, get in your cars. We get in the cars.

10, 15 minutes baking in the sun. Day three, same shit, staying in the air-condition building. They're like, you guys, get in your cars. Got it. Get in your cars. Got it. Walking. walking in slow motion.

Dipping our head socks into like cold water. Put that off or it's going to be gone in five minutes. So enjoy that eye. Hoping that bitch at the last fucking second. Brandon had a shit on one. So like everyone's already packed in. I'm about to get in. I'm like,

Brandon's not even in his. I was like, I'm going to shave for at least five months. Like I can wait until. Brandon comes running. I was like, sorry. I had a shit. Which you don't want to shit in a race car because you're not moving.

And you're strapped in fucking tight. Yeah. So they vibrate. I have the bladder of a little girl and the vibrations every time I get. I'd be like, I'm, I have to piss it like, I'm like 70% of the way there. And then you get in, fire up the engine, click, click, click, click, click. I'm like, I have to piss right now. Locked in for 20 minutes. Okay, one question I do have for you is what is one of your favorite stories when you do your research videos?

You go like ham on those. So what is your favorite that you've got to do or had the most surprise from, like breaking it down? That's like, see, the reason I started doing Mad Ladd was actually completely by accident. The first one was a guy. This was, I just decided to make this as, oh, this is an interesting subject. I'll make a video on it. And I think I said that, oh, this guy's a bit of absolute mad lad. I just said it as like a generic thing because that was just a bit of a lingo that was going on at the time.

and it was on a guy called Dragon Lord. Oh, the German dude. Yeah. There's a little bit of a theory about what's happened to him recently. I don't think it's true, but it fucking might be. But basically, for anyone that doesn't know, he is the biggest lol cow in Germany, and the country has literally got together

to fuck with this one guy. Oh my God, yes. What's a lorkech? Someone who's basically an internet fucking idea, and they're that funny in their life's that much of shit show that you can just keep milking them for lulls. Who's the big of milk one? Christian. Yeah, Christian. Who's the fat dude?

Christian. No, the other fat dude. Oh, uh, boogie. Bougie. Boogie. Boogie is one. I had to act as a sort of a mediator between him and Frank Hassel. Because as you saw the imp-a-punisher? No, you saw, not a doctor. I know everybody says that. Frank Castle? No, it's a Frank, Frank Hassel, you see the infamous incident where Boogie came out of his front door with a gun. That was Frank Hassel that came at his house to mess with him and I was, I went through Boogie going, you came at the door with a gun, you fucking fired it, you were a fucking idiot and everything and he was like, he was in danger and I was like, Boogie, I explained this to you when all this stuff happens. Frank Hassell goes and fucks with

people. He has a rule where he doesn't hit people. Frank Hassel's got videos where people are punching him and beating him up and throwing him over fences and shit like that or pinning him with the throat and he just does that. He never actually hits them or anything because he just, I think he goes, yeah I'm fucking with him like of course I'm gonna get a hat right so yeah so he just takes his beating even though he's a big guy and uh Frank Hassel was at Buggy's door and he goes we have castle doctrine here that means I get to shoot you if you come inside and Frank went well this is hassle doctrine which means I get to come inside but fuck you laugh right and then I ended up saying to Buggy I went you're a fucking idiot and he p.er went my life was in danger

by and killer and I went buggy do you believe in your heart and hearts that you were genuinely in any kind of danger and Biggie actually replied to me saying he threatened to me dangula I was like do you genuinely believe that he was going to come into your house hold you down and

buck fuck you by and this oh so that that never went anywhere and they're still not really talking but Biggie is one but one of the ones that is probably my favourite because I've now done four parts on this guy the last one came out not long ago

basically this guy's life has just been a shit show he was just a funny streamer and he was like very arrogant and everybody was wrong and he was banning people from his chats all the time and he was just an arrogant prick everybody hated him so people would make memes of them they would make troll accounts they would wind them up and everything and it got to one day where basically someone had managed to dox his sister's phone number and left his sister like a threatening voicemail which is shitty like don't don't do shit like that but dragon lord got really angry about it and he posted a video going whoever did that come to my house and fight me and he read out his entire address.

Oh. And German trolls are built different. By the way, they are fucking. Famously an autistic race. They're all loonies. They message me now going, yeah, you got this part wrong. And I'm like, oh, I'm sorry. Dude.

It is that when he threatened, he's like, come fight me or whatever. He said, dude, I was watching that, I was like, oh, that was a dumb choice. Oh, yeah. That was a choice. It became a, the whole thing of messing with him became called the Dragon game, right? And if you went to his house, that was called the Pilgrimage, where people would go to his house and fuck with him all the time. And this happened like three, four, five times a day, every day for years. Like, it was like nine years. He was in that house, like living in. And it was a tiny little village. And the village nicknamed him the ogre. Right? Because at night, you would just hear one of his windows like smash. And then you would just hear him screaming in German, like, and his big, deep voice. It got to the point where people were like firing fireworks at his house and he was like trying to defend himself with a hose. He was even pepper spraying people.

People would smash his windows while he was sleeping. His house looks like fucking Bosnia up, right? The whole place is just butt covered into Friti. There was one time when it was his birthday and people lit a birthday cake. I shouldn't be laughing. It's not funny. Right. And they lit a birthday cake.

They sat outside of these balcony and sang him happy birthday. And because he wouldn't come out, they just launched the cake up to his balcony and you just see it splatch. right. The place was just a shithole, right? And this went on for years and years and years. The police were sick and fed up of him and it got to the point where... It was promised to the internet 2000 years. Well, he broke the cardinal rule. Well, speaking of land seizure. But basically, the government got involved and basically says, we are going to force purchase

your house from you. Get the fuck out the area. Get out. And they, he was also getting arrested tons as well because he was insulting the police. He was making videos when he was going, the police are useless and they didn't help at all. That's a crime in Germany. They have really strict. Offending police officers that's really, really strict. Even if the... God, I love America.

If me and you got in an argument there and I called you a dickhead, I could be arrested for that. Yeah, Germany's free speech laws are nuclear, you know. It turns out the Nazis never really left. Right? But basically, they came in, forced Purchastey's house and went, look, you're going to get like, monthly

benefits and stuff like that, but you've also to stop streaming. And this was a judge warning him he went, you're on here for several assaults of people that have came at your house. And at one point, they held a music festival outside of his house. It was called Shanzanfest. And basically, like, hundreds of people, literally hundreds and hundreds of people descended on this village of, like, 20 people, right? And riot cops and everybody get called in.

They were lighting fires. They were destroying the place and everything. So they got to, the judge went, like, to spare everything. everyone, you're selling your house, you're going to stop streaming. We will put you through college so you can get a proper job, and he refused. He refused. The judge sentenced him to two years, but his lawyer appealed

it, and the way it works in Germany is if you've got an active appeal, you don't go to prison. And it eventually got to the point where the people that were trolling him were the ones being called to court as witnesses. And one of the witnesses to his trial downed an entire bottle of peppermint shnapps as a dare before he went in to give witness testimony.

And he started trolling Dragon Lord and the judge in the middle. the trial. The trial lasted two days and after every... And they were all outside the courthouse, like, shitting up the courthouse and everyone, and it got two days later, the judge went, that's it. He just went, all of your pieces of shit. I hate every single one of you

type thing. But he refused, he ended up, but they ended up, they forced purchase his house. He used it to buy a blue Ford Ranger and went, I'm just going to travel and I'm going to like stream traveling and if the trolls find me, I can keep driving. They created a fucking interactive map that you could update with his location.

like he was fucking bigfoot. And they were tracking him everywhere and they were finding him in the street but it ended up he didn't have a driver's license so the fucking truck got him pounded and taken from him so he was homeless and the problem is now he's homeless so people can just mess with him.

He was camping in the middle of the fucking woods and they still found him. Well that's what I was going to say he violated the golden rule of being on the internet is don't feed the trolls and so these guys would show up at his house like he was saying and he was he was giving them the interaction that they wanted they'd like blow air horns and

every time yeah and they were just escalating because there's hundreds of videos of people outside of his house filming and just making fun of him and stuff like that like hitting him with eggs and he'd always come out and spray him with the hose every time yeah it basically is see if he just ignored it completely and didn't respond he'd have been fine but every single time he did but it got to the point where he eventually was living in a house with people who were alleged full-on Nazis and there was an accusation made against him where allegedly he touched a five-year-old girl that was living in the house with her mother. And it's been, and there's even a confrontation of them kicking him out the house and everything. And it got

to the point where, and it's been since then, no one's heard from him. And these guys found him in the middle of the fucking woods, right? They know where to find him. They're great at this shit. Nobody can find him at all. And there's a theory that the Nazis killed him. And he's fucking buried in the woods somewhere because there's been nothing. There's been nothing at all ever since. Oh, he's just heard about a noise. The accusation is that he molasses kids. Yeah, allegedly.

But apparently the police were notified but there was like, I don't know what came of that because he's now very restrictive in what he lets out there, but all of his social media's gone. He's completely off the internet at all. I did find an Instagram which I think might be his, but he hasn't posted on it roughly about the time this shit happened.

Nazism is illegal in Germany, right? Completely. Yeah. Yeah, which is why they, They have all the same policies, but they call themselves a completely different name and don't use any. The fun time friends. It was like, what was it? What were they before? It was when like the KGB, another still the KGB.

The Stasi? I think the Stasi would East Germany. Oh, yeah. I can't remember. It's been basically the KGB, whatever they were before. They rebranded and all they did was changed the site. Was that a man still doing the same shit? Just a different name.

Yeah, but so he's, oh, the FSB. Yeah, the new KGB. I misunderstood. Yeah, yeah, no, but basically, so that's a mad lad who was the first one. And I think it might be over. But I've no idea. I don't think he's actually dead. I think it's finally sank in where he's like, yeah, my life went to shit, like completely.

And I am not doing myself any favor. So I'm hoping he's grew up and he's moved on. Should have took that deal. Yeah, he should have took the deal. He should have took the deal. Damn good deal. Damn good deal. I take that deal.

And homie fucking chose chaos. Oh, people, he got catfish. all the time and it got to a point where he had like an online girlfriend who would even appear in his stream and he proposed to her on stream. And then she replies to him saying you're the fatest dumbest guy I've ever met in my life and then two guys jumped in on either side of her blowing party horns and everything and pointing and laughing at him and everything like they're like I said German trolls are built different man they will do the cruelest fucking shit. I don't know how that guy. Yeah. I'm amazed he still. He hasn't went completely

insane. I'm amazed that he's not completely lost his fucking mind. That's for me. I'm like, man, that's pushing that person to the limit of yeah. Huh. 12, 13 reasons. That's my 17th reason. Yeah. I think it's been

going on total about 12 years. 12 years he's went through all that stuff. Damn. I know. God damn, dude. Well, if he touched that child, then he deserved it. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, we're fine with that. It turns out when it comes to sexual deviancy, that's not the only thing he's done,

but let's not go into all that. But yeah. Dude. Count Dancula. Thank you so far. This has been fucking absolute blast, dude. It was an honor to have you. Where do the people find you on all the different socials?

Count Dankula TV on Twitter, and I apologize in advance for my behavior. Like on Twitter, but it's a Count Dankula on YouTube. That's the best place to find me. Just Count Dancula? Just count Dankula on YouTube. Yeah, dude, thank you so much.

Cody, you want to close us out? Thank you guys for joining the unsubscribe podcast. Today I was joined by Eli Double Tab, Count Dankula, King Trout, myself, Don't Operator. Thank you so much for being here. We love you. Give it a kiss. Don't kiss it. Just blow them a kiss.

Okay. Oh, hey.