Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! - WWDTM: Kali Reis

Episode Date: January 17, 2026

This week, special guest Kali Reis joins panelists Rachel Coster, Hari Kondabolu, and Luke BurbankLearn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

This message comes from Databricks, the data and AI company. Are your AI agents working? Most aren't reliable for business. You need AI that's accurate. Agent Bricks, AI agents grounded in your data and built for your goals. From NPR and WVZ Chicago, this is, wait, wait, don't tell me the NPR News Quiz. I'm the voice so soothing. Lullabies listen to me to fall asleep.

I'm Bill Curtis. And here's your host at the Studebaker Theater at the Fine Arts Building in Chicago, Illinois. Peter Segal. Thank you, Bill. Thank you, everybody. Thank you so much. So good to be with you.

You do have a great show of here today. Later on, we're going to be talking to Kaylee Reese, a champion boxer who seemingly almost overnight became an acclaimed and Emmy-nominated actor starring in HBO's True Detective. She's now starring in the upcoming movie, Mercy. We assume that she learns her line. by punching them.

If you'd like to try your hand at a non-contact competition, give us a call to play our games. That's 1-3-8-8-8-8-2-4. That's 1-88-9-2-4. It's time to welcome our first listener-contestant. Hi, you're on Wait-Wait-Wait, don't tell me. Hi, Peter. My name is Benjamin, and I'm calling from Boston, Massachusetts.

Boston. I spent a lot of time in Boston, one of my favorite places. What do you do there? Well, I work as a computational chemist at a scientific software and discovery company called Schrodinger. Typical Boston guy, am I right?

Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. That's great. Well, welcome to the show, Benjamin. Let me introduce you to our panel this week. First up, she's host of the TikTok series, Boy Room, found wherever you might watch your short-form videos. It's Rachel Koster. Next up, he's a comedian and co-host of the new podcast, Health Stuff,

which is found wherever you get your podcasts. It's Hari Kandabolu. Hello, sir. Hi, Harry. And he is the host of the daily podcast, TB, TL, as well as the public radio variety show LiveWire, which will be live at the Reeser Center for the Arts in Beaverton, Oregon. On January 23rd, it's our old friend Luke Burbank. Hey there, Benjamin.

Hi, Luke. So Benjamin, welcome to the show. You're going to play Who's Bill this time? Bill Curtis is going to read you three quotations from this week's news. If you can correctly identify or explain just two of them, you will win our prize. Any voice from our show you might choose for your voicemail. Are you ready to go? Yeah, I'm ready.

All right. Your first quote is from President Trump, responding to a country saying it wanted to remain part of Denmark. That's their problem. Whose problem is it that they don't want to be invaded by the United States? That would be Greenland. That would be Greenland. This week, the administration met with the leaders of both Denmark and Greenland

and told them, get ready to get liberated. Trump has been obsessed with Greenland for a long time, and we know why they made Greenland one of the five words he had to remember on his cognitive test. I don't think I knew Greenland was a real place until about eight months ago.

I don't think the president did either. Yeah. That's why neither of us should be trying to take control of the place. We only learned existed eight months ago. Now, people have speculated, and the White House, like, has not been able to deny this that Trump wants Greenland so badly because it looks so much bigger on flat maps, right,

than it actually is. Their Mercator projection is if I needed to tell NPR people about that. We should never, never have given them any of those map-of-the-world placements. It's oil, right? What is up there? No, there's... What is there? There's rare earth minerals. Oh, okay, right.

Which ones? I don't know. That's how rare. He doesn't know. They're rare, though, and they're in the earth. We have to go get them, right? There's got to be aliens there or something. Like, he knows something.

You think? Yeah, of course. Why would he be so excited and be keeping it such a secret? Rare minerals, no one's going to look into that. An alien, I would live there if no one else is there. And I haven't thought this one through. Sorry, guys. Well, pretty much neither has anyone else.

You want to be president? Exactly. All right, very good. Here is your next quote. We will be installing a few bidetes in Gracie Mansion. That was somebody moving into his new residence in New York this week. Who is it? That would be Zoran Mamdani.

Zoran Mamdani. Very good, Benjamin. Two weeks after his inauguration, New York's new mayor, Zoran Mamdani and his wife, Rama, are moving from, this is true, their one-bedroom, in Queens to the 11,000 square foot mansion on the Upper East Side of Manhattan that he gets to live in for free. See, he told you he would make housing more affordable. And the bidet is that he is, in fact, having installed there, are just confirming for as many enemies

that he is one of those effete European types. Real Americans don't even wash their hands. he's installing bidetes or as we say New York he's taking care of the subway the underground as it were I am I'm a huge proponent of bidetes as I've often said if you got some peanut butter and a shag rug you wouldn't take it out with a paper towel

and I've never I've never heard that metaphor before and I think I can tell you Why? It's insane. Carbidding is so old-fashioned. Because of my love of bidets, I was doing some remodeling at my house,

and I thought I was really upgrading these two little bathrooms. Both of them have these robo toilets that have the bidet built into the toilet. Yes, those great Japanese. And I was so excited to have people over and to have everybody enjoying this really nice experience. And everyone has been going out to the garage to use the one normal toilet at my house. because these toilets are terrifying if you've never used one before. I ask both for myself and for the new mayor of New York, if you were to throw a party or a gathering

in which the purpose was to have people use the bidetes that you're so proud of, what do you serve? See, that's a trap, and I'm not going to fall into it. We did have a comment card that people were filling out on the way out. Like, how did you enjoy your bidet experience? I understand. I understand. What's interesting, this is, and I don't think this has ever been as true in the history of New York politics, it's such an upgrade for the Mondani's, right? 11,000 square feet is a tremendous amount of space to fill when you only own two IKEA tables and a futa.

Prior mayors, right? Very different. Mayor Bloomberg, this is true, never moved into Gracie Mansion because it would have been a downgrade from his own home. That's true. Now Rudy Giuliani, on the other hand, keeps texting Mondani, asking him if it's cool if he comes back and couch surfs for a couple of weeks. He gets some things sorted. Eric Adams just lived in the club. Yeah. He didn't have to go home. He was riding up to Molly High. Yeah.

All right. Benjamin, your last quote is from a NASA astronaut talking about their next mission. We are ready. We are going. It turns out that very soon we will be going back. back where? Would that be the moon? It would be, Benjamin, the moon.

NASA announced this week that the first Artemis Moon mission could launch as soon as February 6th, which is really soon. I mean, all of a sudden, they're going to the moon. This is like when my family puts off making spring break plans for too long,

and then it's like, oh my God, it's coming up in three weeks, so let's just go to the moon again. It's nice. Man, the moon landing. Really? Yet another Hollywood remake. Am I right? Can that come up with the original IP? Is it really that interesting to go to the moon anymore?

Because we've already done it, and at this point it's just a gas station on the way to Mars. Well, that's why they're presumably going. They need to set up the gas station. Right. Is Tom Hanks going to be part of this moon mission? Because I really think he should be. He did it good last time. He did it fine. He did it fine, yeah. Like it looked bad for a while, but he figured it out. Yeah.

By the way, the news came the same week, I don't know if this was a coincidence, that a crew of four NASA astronauts returned to Earth early from the International Space Station because of a, quote, health issue, unquote. NASA isn't saying what it is, and neither is that little freaks that just burst out of the astronaut's chest. Bill, how did Benjamin do in our quiz? Benjamin is so smart. He got them all right. Congratulations. Thank you. Benjamin, congratulations, and I'll see you around the common someday, I hope. Looking forward to it.

Take care. Bye, bye-bye. I hope you're having a good town. We'll reach a destination soon. We just having a quick ride to the moon. Right now, panel, time for you to answer some questions about this week's news. Rachel, yes. Rachel's scientists working together around the world have finally agreed on the answer

to the most important question about exercise. What is that question? How long before you get abs if you don't do that much work? You're close. Okay. You're close, but that's not right. What's the best way to make someone fall in love with you for your body, but not in a way that they'll break up with you if you change?

I don't know. The real answer. So I love that. The idea is like, you know, you want to be. So, like, you want them to fall in love with you because you're, like, hard-bodied, sexy, completely, you know, clenched. But then if things, like, kind of, you get comfortable and, like, you're just having, like, meals at home a lot, then we'll stick around.

What is the time frame and this transformation in your mind? I can gain weight pretty fast, I would say. I would say it within a month. I'm a different girl. Okay. I'm just going to say, just, based on this conversation, I'm going to say that you'll be very interested in this finding because this is, they figured out what about exercise, specifically the amount of exercise.

Um, one hour week, all you need. I'm going to give you to you. They've figured out the minimum amount of exercise people need. What is it? Working out once a week for 20 minutes. 20 minutes. Has real benefits. No, no.

It's science. This country's gone soft. I agree with Pegstead. Literally. Walking a little more quickly, just a little bit more quickly, will extend your lifespan significantly. Even vigorously running

errands helps. So just order, really, this is true. This is science. So just order some weights from Amazon and then immediately return them. You did it. Now, enjoy that smoothie. You've earned it. So my walk to the coffee shop in the morning and back, that I'm good. Yeah, but. You're basically a hero. If you were, if you just walk more quickly and make it just a little, little hard, then you get huge health benefits and you'll extend your lifespan. All right. I'll think about it.

Right. Coming up, our panelists rub elbows with the rich and famous and our beloved listener game call 1-3-8 Wait Wait to Play. We'll be back in a minute with more of Whitway Don't Tell Me from NPR. This message comes from Wise,

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whether it's Bruce Springsteen or Questlove or Olivia Rodriguez, Liz Cheney, or the godfather of artificial intelligence, Jeffrey Hinton, or some of my extraordinarily well-informed colleagues at The New Yorker. So join us every week on the New Yorker Radio Hour, wherever you listen to podcast. Support for NPR and the following message come from the Lemelson Foundation, dedicated to improving lives through invention, innovation, and climate action. From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We are playing this week with Rachel Kuster, Harigandibolu, and Luke Burbank. And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theater and Shoeuvre.

Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sengel. Thank you, Bill. Right now it's time to wait, wait, wait, don't tell me, bluff the listener game called 1-3-8-8-wait-wait-to-player game in the air. How you were on, wait-wait, don't tell me. Hi, this is Lauren from Minneapolis, Minnesota. Ah, Minneapolis. A lot of fans here.

Minneapolis does. What do you do there? I'm an internal auditor at the Federal Reserve Bank of Minneapolis. Yeah, okay. You live in Minneapolis. You work at the Federal Reserve. You have no stress in your life whatsoever. I'm so glad to hear it.

Well, Lauren, it's great to have you with us. You're going to play the game in which you must try to tell truth from fiction. Bill, what is Lauren's topic? I'm star-struck. It's always exciting to meet a celebrity. Who knows, you might discover that stars are just like us, except, of course, they're not. Our panelists are going to tell you about a star-studded encounter that we found in the news. Pick the one who's telling the truth you'll win our prize, the wait-waiter of your choice and your voicemail.

Are you ready to play? Yep. All right. from Harikanda Bolu. When Jutton Chopra went shoe shopping last week, he thought he was getting some new kicks. Instead, he picked up the story of a lifetime. As the music blasted in the trendy streetwear store, Tutsis,

Chopra heard a quiet pss, pst from the bench next to him. It was Timothy Shalameh. Chopra was familiar with Shalemay's work because, according to Chopra, quote, my wife has a huge crush on him, which is weird because he looks like that. But Chalemay wasn't at the store to promote his new movie or white rap. He was there to buy sneakers, and he had a problem. According to Chopra, Shalemay whispered,

Hey, bro, can you tie my shoes for me? I never learned. That's right, while Timothy Shalamay can sing like Bob Dylan play professional level ping pong and do whatever Dune is about, he never learned how to tie his shoes. Jutton Chopra didn't just tie Shalame's laces, but he Mr. Rogered the situation and taught him how to do it for himself. Wow, they really do look like bunny ears, marveled the Oscar-nominated actor. The man teaches Timothy Shalamee how to tie his shoes because you didn't know how.

Your next story of a dazzling, how do you do, comes from Rachel Koster. Football fans will do whatever it takes to lift their team spirits. Usually that only goes as far as wearing the team's colors or getting really hammered and screaming at them. But for one fan, it didn't stop there. Natasha Lane, a Florida native, was waiting for a friend outside of Pete's bar in Jacksonville, a bar with mostly positive reviews,

excluding one one-star review that says, stay away, lots of fights, if you like that. As she waited, who else would enter the bar but Jacksonville Jaguar star quarterback Trevor Lawrence, who was coming off a high from his victory against the Titans 41 to 7. Lawrence wasn't the only winner that night because upon seeing him in all of his big football guy glory,

Natasha Lane asked what every girl dreams of asking an insanely hot pro athlete when he walks into your neighborhood bar. She asked if she could squat him. The five-foot-five inch tall, 31-year-old, hoisted the six-foot-six-inch tall, 220-pound Lawrence onto her back and proceeded to squat him five times with perfect form. The Samsonian effort was recorded by a friend and went viral. When asked what Lane would do if she ever saw Trevor Lawrence again, she replied, I would ask, can I squat you again?

A woman meets her sports hero in a bar and immediately asks to squat him. Your last VIP in passing comes from Luke Burbank. Sandy DeCarlo knew her plumber looked familiar, as she explained to the Daily Columbian last week. The toilet in our guest bathroom kept backing up, so I called a company to come fix it. and when the guy shows up, I was like, is that Christian Bale? It was Christian Bale, doing research for an upcoming film role where he plays a plumber. He introduced himself as Ricky, but I could definitely tell he was Christian Bale,

who counts herself a fan of his work in the Batman movies and American Psycho. I told him what an honor it was to have Christian Bale fixing my toilet, but he just looked at me like I was crazy and headed for the guest bathroom. after four hours of dismantling the toilet with apparently no clear idea on how to reassemble it, it also became obvious that Christian Bale doesn't know anything about plumbing. According to DeCarlo, Bale was swearing under his breath in his Welsh accent, which was another big giveaway. Eventually, Ricky said he needed to go back to the shop to get more parts. That was last Tuesday.

He has yet to return. But Sandy is not mad. She says, I just think it's so cool. cool that the Christian Bale broke my toilet. All right. One of the celebrity encounters happened in the news, and we found it. Can you pick it out from the fakes? Was it from Haricandabolu, a man who happened to run into Timothy Chalame in a shoe store

and taught him to tie his shoes? From Rachel Koster, a woman who ran into the quarterback of the Jacksonville Jaguars, threw him upon her shoulders and did squats, or from Luke Burbank, a woman who was convinced that it was Christian Bale who came to her. house and ruined her toilet. Which of these is the real celebrity encounter we found in the news? Um, I'm going to say it's Trevor Lawrence. Seems like something a girl would do. Here's the great thing we happen to have for you now, the voice of the celebrity in question, describing the event. Did not think that was going to happen, so, I mean, you know,

I was going to squat. She didn't just pick me up. That was Trevor Lawrence, talking about getting squatted in a bar for a group of reporters. Congratulations, your instincts were correct. That is something a woman would do. Lauren, congratulations. You have correctly, you first of all, won a point just because Rachel told the truth for her, but you have also won our prize.

So congratulations very much. Congratulations, and thank you so much for calling. And now the game we call Not My Job, if you first saw actor Kaylee Reese, starring with Jody Foster in the series True Detective Night Country and HBO, you probably said, wow, what an amazing actor. Did she train at Yale or Juilliard? No, she trained at the Big Six Boxing Academy in Providence, Rhode Island.

The former world champion Walter Waite Boxer now stars in the movie Mercy coming out next week. Kaylee Reese, welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. So I was kind of describing myself. I saw you in True Detective Night Country as extremely important. impressed, as were the Emmy Committee, you were nominated. And I was amazed to discover that was, as far as I can tell, your third professional acting job. Correct. It was my third professional acting job, first TV show ever. Wow. And you did, in fact, train at the Big Six Boxing Academy in Providence where you're from, right? Yes, that is my extended family. I've been training with them

for a very, very long time. And from a very young age, when did you start boxing? Around the age of 13 or 14, I found boxing. Prior to that, I did, I played softball, played basketball. I'm one of five kids. I'm the youngest girl. I always tried to do what my big brothers did. But nobody in my family boxed. It was kind of, you know, grown up, I wanted to be the karate kid.

I wanted to be brusely, you know, I was so obsessed with Rocky. So it just kind of happened. Yeah. Wow. I mean, you were obsessed with Rocky. Wait a minute. I know some elite athletes. It doesn't just kind of happen, right?

You must have, like, really been dedicated to it. Yeah, I was dedicated to, I mean, you know, I was a little rough kid growing up. You know, I wouldn't start fights, but I'd finish her. Oh, yeah. So, you know, I didn't like see kids getting bullied. I didn't like getting bullied, so I would always be the one standing up for the bullies. But it wasn't, like, I wasn't trying to be a fighter. I do come from a very musically inclined family, very artistic family.

Fun fact, my father used to actually play with Marky Mark in the funky bunch. She was... No. Really? He was part of the bunch? He was part of the bunch. She was the keyboard player. So there was good vibrations everywhere.

Wait a minute. You're a descendant of Marky Mark. You truly are. New England royalty. That is... I'll take that. I know. That is amazing.

And so, again, I stress how amazed I am that with a background not in acting, how good an actor you are. I know you have talked about how the discipline and focus of elite boxing has helped you in the acting world. But isn't there an element of acting and boxing in the way-ins when you're like glaring at the opponent? You're like fronting a little bit, right?

I mean, did that... Oh, it's an entertainment business at the very core of it. I mean, we're up on a stage. We're performing. You know, there's a character. I'm not going around one shot and hit people on the street. That's not who I am as a person. But it's also like, you know, you have to be an artist.

You have to, you know, you have to be really calm. you have to prepare. But there are people who build characters, big charismatic entertainment. You know, all that buildup is really good for when people tune in. I mean, we have some really cool things happen in boxing because of that charismatic type of entertainment value of boxing. So absolutely, we are performing there. Right.

I mean, was there ever a moment when you started acting where you were like, you were completely at sea and you were like, you mean, they want me to say these words as if I'm thinking of them now? I mean, do you know what I mean? Yeah, it's a crazy concept, but what helps me is I have a huge imagination. I, you know, it's not a big surprise I got into acting. It wasn't something that I grew up, but I want to be an actor, but I used to have these, like, I love to, like, just people watch and observe.

So I used to have this character that I used to get my mom stuff, like her jewelry and everything, and I used to have this, I'm from Rhode Island. We have a very heavy accent, but there's some more than others. I used to have this character called Mary, and I used to come off. I remember, like, how you doing, Dad? and I love to see it. I used to do this whole thing, and it wasn't so far-fetched.

So it really wasn't, I could immerse myself in this imaginary world anytime, by myself, which should be studied. I probably should. People as a child. I don't know why my mom didn't have me to go to therapy. Speaking of your accent, I read that in True Detective Night Country,

you play an Alaskan native. But what I read, and you can tell me if it's true or not, is that your native or island accent would come out frequently enough, that they figured they'd better write that into your character so that it would be explicable if all of a sudden you're like you're like looking at a corpse or something and you're like oh that's wicked gross yeah they uh i love isa the director she decided to make my character part of it

because i was you know working with the dialect coach to keep my quote-unquote accent at bay i didn't want to sound like peter griffin making you know an investigation you know what i mean so i just i think you just sold the next hit series for xbio by the way Hopefully with you in the lead. Go on. It was weird how your character always had a cup of Dunkin. It was strange. So in everything you've started in so far,

from like True Detective to this new movie, Mercy, you always play people who seem like they could and would kick your ass at any moment. So do you ever, like, want to get cast in like a different kind of part, like romantic lead in a Hallmark movie? Presumable bad. I would love to.

I would love to. You know, I want to dabble on some comedy. I would love to do some comedy. I love a challenge I love something that maybe I'm not as strong at yet I would love to take any whatever is meant for me I don't want to just stick to the I mean I can't help the bad assery

just shines through it does it kind of does I'm sorry How about let me put something to you How about a Hallmark movie Where you come back to your hometown Leaving the Big City And you find the guy Who broke your heart

20 years before And it turns out he's a jerk and you Beat the crap out of me I'm sorry I got That's happened. It's fine. That's another show for HBO. We're all for lining up projects for you. Well...

Well, Kaylee Reese, it is a pleasure to talk to you, and we have asked you here, as we do with everyone, to play a game. And in your case, we're calling it... The future is here. And by here, we mean Las Vegas, because that's where every year the Consumer Electronics Show happens. It just rattle.

this year. It's the annual convention where tech companies show off their newest innovations, hopefully to the public that will love them. So we're going to ask you three questions about the CES Consumer Electronics Show, past and present. If you get too right, you'll want a prize for our listeners. Bill, who is Kaylee Rees playing for? Christopher Wolfe of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. All right. Hey, go birds. Here's your first question. At the 2017, CES, Intel made way when they introduced their newest VR headset, which they handed out to members of the media, along with what?

A, a nurse with an IV, so they wouldn't have to stop playing and, you know, eat. B, protective gear for when they banged into each other while playing the games, or C, barf bags. C. You're right. You knew it. And you're right, yeah. The demo program that they tried out

included jumping off helicopters, traveling to Vietnam, flying high with a drone, and in some cases, apparently, projectile vomiting. All right. Good. You did that really well. Now, there are always robots being demoed at CES, but in 2020, the most exciting new robot had one purpose.

What was it? A, to open your car door from the inside if you lock your keys in the car. B, to look up people's names that you have forgotten at a party, or C, to bring you a roll of toilet paper if you run out while you are in the bathroom. I'm going to go at C, because I hope that exists. It does. It's your right a tech company partnered

with Charmin to create a new robot which you operate with your smartphone from the toilet. I need that. We all do. But here's the thing.

So you have the wherewithal the foresight to set up the robot in its little niche wherever it is with a roll of toilet paper on it, all set to go. Why don't you just put the roll of toilet paper

in the bathroom? All right. I've seen time. stepchildren forget to put it in the bathroom and then you're stuck there with no toilet paper. I'm just going to say I haven't seen all your projects as a performer, but I've never seen you more vulnerable than you were in that moment. That's, see, I just gave you like an audition of my vulnerability. I know, man. I am ready to cast you in your latest project about a vulnerable, sensitive woman who's caught in a bathroom with no toilet paper. That's going to be my first short.

Absolutely. We are planning a career here. Okay, last question. You were doing this pretty much about as well as you have done everything else you have ever attempted. At this year, CES, one manufacturer introduced the new device with which you can enjoy music. What is it?

A, a large case with two built-in stereo speakers known as an eye boom box. B, a lollipop that plays music inside your head when you suck on it, or see a robot bassist complete with genuinely, Benuant bassist scent. What was B again? B was a lollipop that plays music inside your head while you suck on it.

I'm going to go with B because that sounds kind of cool. You're right again. I mean, your competence extends to everything. When you put lollipop scar, that is what it is called in your mouth. It vibrates against your teeth, which connects to your face bones, which connects to your ear bones. And it comes in three flavors, or rather, songs.

Bill, how did Kaylee Reese do on our quiz? Well, if I don't get it right, she's going to come down and beat the living hell out of it. Fortunately, I don't have to because she is perfect. Three in a row. There you go. I mean, honestly,

Kaylee Reese is an Emmy nominated actress and member of the International Women's Boxing Hall of Fame. You can see her in the new movie Mercy that is out next week. Kaylee Reese, what a pleasure to talk to you. Thank you so much for joining us. And wait, wait, wait, don't tell me. Thank you.

Thank you. In just a minute, Bill pays tribute to some grateful gams in our listener at Limerick Challenge. Call 1-8-8-Wait-wait to join us on the air. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, from NPR. Happy New Year. Want to set goals that you'll actually stick to in 2026. You want to accept yourself in the situation you're in, but you also want to expect more from yourself and say,

what are the ways that I can grow? This week, how to design and plan your year on the Life Kit podcast. Listen in the NPR app or wherever you get your podcasts. Are you thinking about making any changes in the new year? The Life Kit podcast is here to help. In each episode, we have research-backed strategies and expert advice on everything from meal prep to strengthening relationships to paying down your credit card debt. Make your resolution stick. Listen to the Life Kit podcast on the NPR app or wherever you get.

get your podcasts. From NPR, WBEZ Chicago, this is, wait, wait, don't tell me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We are playing this week with Luke Burbank, Rachel Koster, and Hariconda Bolu. And here we get as your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Illinois. Peter, Saga. Thank you, Bill. In just a minute, we get to the rhymiest part of our show.

It's called The Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-3-888-8-8-8-8-2-4. Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Hari, scientists have known for years that unlike all other animals, and this is true, of course, wombat poop is cube-shaped. You all knew that, right?

But a new study finally tells us why that is. What's the reason? They're robots. They're not robots. They're wombats. They're a wonderful Australian marsupial. I guess they have the stinkiest instance. in the animal kingdom.

They're trying to repel predators with... What arrives in your inbox? Your inbox. Mail. Which is a kind of... Paper. Kind of correspondence. It's a way to communicate with the other wombats.

Yes, if they're communicating with other wombats with their square poop. You got it. Yes. That's insane. Some species, like us, communicate by email or text. Some do it via poop cubes. Here's the amazing part. All the wombat messages begin.

I hope this poop cube finds you well. If I was pooping square, I'd leave that behind for my roommates to find to send a very powerful message. I've got something extremely cool going on in my body. Yeah. So wombats tend to be loners. They avoid each other in the wild, but they like to poop in common areas, and they do it to let the other wombats who are around know that they're there and more or less who they are. It's sort of like very stinky, hello, my name is badges, right?

And the reason the poop in cubes is so these very important messages to other wombats do not roll away. Wow. Isn't that amazing? And it's also so the wombats can use them as dice afterwards. Trust me, you do not want to play wombat yotsie. Luke, new editor-in-chief, Barry Weiss, has been remaking CBS News, and in just a few months... I've heard. Yes.

And in just a few months, she's already lost a million viewers. So, to make the newscast more fun and relatable, they have announced a new weekly feature in which anchor Tony DeCopal will do what on air? Drink? Jack Daniels Whiskey. That's right. CBS News is testing a segment with their new anchor called Whiskey Fridays with Tony DeCopal. I know it's hard to believe.

But as Walter Cronkite might say, if he were working at CBS News today, Lash the way it is. So it's great. A drinking segment. Instead of throwing to commercial, they'll throw up to commercial. And as you said, a picture of the set shows an anchor desk in the middle of what looks like of a homie bar with a Jack Daniels sign prominently displayed. And if you're wondering how this whole idea is being received, Jack Daniels, the company, put out a statement saying, They had nothing to do with it.

That's true. Imagine if your behavior is so embarrassing that Jack Daniels doesn't want anything to do with it. Another W for the Tiffany Network. Exactly. Now, Mr. DeCopal, who is on board with a new program, he posted to Twitter this week, quote, you may not agree with everything you hear on our broadcast,

but we trust you to hear it, unquote. So I guess... Wait, you're going to listen up. I guess we can deduce it's also Whiskey Tuesdays with Don't have anything. Wait, so he's just saying that you might not agree with what we're saying, but you're going to hear it. The average age of a CBS viewer is like 98. Like, I don't know if they're going to hear it. It's true.

Respectfully. Respectfully. Yeah. Got where it was for a second. Coming up, it's lightning fill in the blank, but first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call and leave a message at 1-3-3-1-3-2-1-3-2-1-3. Wait, wait, wait, that's 1,88-924-8-924. You can come see us most weeks right here

at the Studebaker Theater in downtown Chicago, and you can also catch us on the road, and if you live in Chicago, I'm going to come hang out with our panelists without me constantly interrupting them, come check out our special comedy grab bag live stand-up show March 11th at the Den Theater in Wicker Park. Adam Burke will be hosting along with Alzo Slade,

Joel, Nicole Johnson, and more. For tickets and more information for all of our live events, go to NPR Presents.org. And while you're at it, head over to npr shop.org and check out our new merch. Grab one of our new wait-wait-wait teas and sweatshirts and we can be twinsies. Hi, you're on Wait-Wait-Wait-Don't tell me. Hi, my name is Ken, and I'm from Champaign, Illinois. Hey, Ken, how are things down to champagne?

A little chilly, little windy, but not too bad. Not too bad, and what do you do there? Well, when I'm not chasing after my four-year-old or working from home, I play a lot of board games. Really? You're one of those board game geeks that I know and admire so much. I'm probably a little bit past that. The collection is sitting around 2,100 items. 2,100 different board games?

I guess I should ask, what is your favorite? It doesn't quite work like that. Peter, you've embarrassed yourself again. I really have. So, wait a minute. So how does it work? Well, okay. What movie would you watch with your kids?

And is that the same movie you'd watch with? your wife? Well, yes. Parts of the Caribbean. Parts the Caribbean. Yeah. Well, welcome to the show, Ken. Bill Curtis is going to read you three news-related limericks with the last word or phrase missing from each. If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly, and to the limericks, you will be a winner. Ready to apply? I think so. Okay. Here is your first limerick. With Bob Weir's guitar in support, the Grateful Dead gladly held court. and with his style of dress his legs would impress

because he cut off his jeans really short. Yes, short when Grateful Dead founding guitarist Bob Weir transitioned to the actual dead last week you realize they were asking

for it from the beginning for that time. Fans around the world paid tribute to him observing a moment of silence that was in honor of his music 16 minutes long. But people didn't celebrate just his music. They also celebrated his iconic short shorts.

They were such a part of his identity that deadheads, this is true, do not call cut off jeans Daisy Dukes. They call them Bobby Shorts. The rest of us might call them uncomfortably shorts. So he would just play with his butt cheeks hanging out?

Pretty much. Wow. None. The whole point of those concerts is to trip on drugs not your pant leg. That's true. So it's important to keep them tight to the body. That's absolutely true.

All right, here is your next limerick. Not all princes can dance at our ball. And some short kings might just start a brawl. To enter our club, you can't be a wee cub. You must be at least six feet. Tall. Yes, a nightclub in London is only letting men enter if they are over. six feet tall.

As to why they're doing that and what happens inside, how am I supposed to know? We're all just grabbing some of our shelves bumping into stuff. Here, Bill, let me climb on your shoulders. I have an idea. The event, it's these one-off events, they've

already sold out. It's called Land of the Giants. Oh, good. You know what they make this really funny? If these guys line up to get in, they get in, and the ceiling of the club is like at five foot ten. And all the guys trying to pick up the girls were coming and her like, hey, ow! I mean, what's your ow? Name.

Here is your last limerick. My green Buddha gets prayers and respect. You see weird ears, but I didn't check. You say he's an ogre with bad swampy odors. Turns out, I've been praying to... Shrek, yes. A woman in the Philippines worshiped. shipped a green figurine for four years, believing it was a statue of the Buddha, only to finally

discover it was actually a little figurine of Shrek. Now, I know you're laughing, how could this be, but if you knew what it looked like, it would make more sense to you. First, picture, Shrek, that's what it looked like. According to one article about this woman's mistake, quote, with its round shape and gentle expression, she believed it to be a depiction of Buddha. and treated it with great reverence. Is it really that much of a mistake? Shrek is also a source of enlightenment? What is the sound of one donkey farting?

I have to say I feel for her. As a girl dating in New York City, I've also worshipped the wrong nasty guy for a really long time. And I regret it too. Yeah, we're not going to judge. Bill, how did Ken do in our quiz? He did. Perfect. Way to go, Kim.

Congratulations, you won our game. Thank you. Take care. Thank you. On Planet Money, we have covered a lot of topics. Like, just try searching something on the internet and adding Planet Money to the end of it. Tariff prices, Planet Money, that's an episode. Stop Sign War, Planet Money, that too.

Alaska Halibut Derby, Planet Money. If you can ask it, we have probably answered it. Planet Money, listen on the NPR app or wherever you get your podcast. This week on the NPR Politics Podcast, Iran, Greenland, Venezuela. How does all of that square up with America first? It's not that Trump's ideology changed. Trump has really just gotten better at using the levers of power and he's just doing a lot more. Listen to the NPR Politics podcast every weekday afternoon on the NPR app or wherever you get your podcasts.

Now onto our final game, lightning fell in the blank, each of our players will have six 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores? Rachel and Luke each have two. Hary has three. All right. Hari is in first place. The other two are tied for a second. So I will arbitrarily pick you, Luke, to go first. Here we go. The clock will start when they begin your first question, fill in the blank. On Wednesday, the White House said it would stop processing blank applications from over 50 countries.

Immigration. Close enough, visa. On Thursday, 17 players were charged with a scheme to shave points during college at blank games. Basketball. Right. This week, Russia launched another massive aerial assault on blank. Ukraine. Right. According to a new poll, over half of Americans think that blank officers are making cities less safe. Ice. Right. After naming his new megayat, Izanami, billionaire Larry Ellison is renaming it because blank. That name was already taken.

No, because people pointed out that it spells, I am a Nazi backwards. On Wednesday, the IOC began a lottery to win tickets to the 2020. summer games in blank. Los Angeles. Right. This week, IOC officials said they definitely be ready for the upcoming Winter Olympics in Milan

despite reports that the ice hockey rink had blank. Melted. No, a hole in it. Olympic officials in Italy said the country will be 100% ready to host the winter games despite a test event at the hockey arena

being delayed thanks to a hole in the ice. They should model their prep on the TV show heated rivalry where the only holes are off the ice. We were all curious about how that sentence was going to end. Bill, how did Luke do in our quiz? He had five right, ten more points.

Tuttle to 12 puts him in the lead. All right, very good, Luke. For now. Rachel. Yes. You're up next. I'm ready. Here we go.

On Thursday, President Trump threatened to invoke the Insurrection Act to quell the protests in blank. Minneapolis. Right. On Sunday, the DOJ said they'd opened a criminal. investigation into federal reserve chair blank. I don't know. Jerome Powell. Sorry about that.

It's okay. On Wednesday, Microsoft agreed to pay higher electricity bills in cities where they build blanks. AI, uh, yeah. Data centers, that's right. This week, a bear in California who was finally removed from a crawl space by wildlife officials immediately blanked. Uh, pooped. No.

Moved into a neighbor's crawl space. Oh. On Monday, on Monday, luxury retailer blank filed for bank drafts. protection. Right. That you know, on Sunday. On Sunday, Hamnet and won battle after another were the big winners at the 20206. Yes, Blank Awards. This week, a man who had collected a jarful of valuable

U.S. coins was shocked when his partner blanked. Took them. No. One brought them to the store and exchanged them all for a couple of dollars. No. A man's partner took the jarful of old coins. Some he'd collected years ago, and that were worth $1,000 each, and brought them to the store.

to get rid of all that loose change, get paper money. Although lucky for him, and this is true, she did save, among all the coins, the Chucky Cheese tokens that were in there. The man was disappointed to lose such a valuable coin collection, but the woman is making up for it by mailing him an apology note every day using those old stamps he had lying around.

Bill, how did Rachel do in our quiz? Four right, eight more points. Ten puts her in second place. All right. How many then does Hardy Condoolou need to win? Five to win. All right, here we go. Hurry, this is for the game. On Tuesday, Bill and Hillary Clinton refused to appear

before the House Oversight Committee investigating the blank files. Epstein. Amid the ongoing government crackdown, several European countries urged their citizens to leave blank. Leave their homes. No, leave Iran. On Wednesday, an outage of blank cellular network left tens of thousands without service.

Verizon? Yes. This week, a TV station in Japan regularly interrupted a horror movie to broadcast blank. Godzilla. No, they interrupted the movie to broadcast a monk who offered a prayer every time the evil ghost killed someone. Don't want people to worry. After a four-year hiatus, K-pop Giants Blank announced a world tour.

BTF? Right. This week, blank rates fell to their lowest level in three years. Interest. Close enough, mortgage rates. This week, a man developed a new invention that you affixed to your car's back bumper that allows the cars behind you to blank. Go to hell. No.

nor does it suggest that they do that. No, it allows the people in the cars behind you to watch TikToks while they are all stuck in traffic with you. It's called honk to swipe. It's a tablet attached to the back of your car that lets people watch TikTok and scroll to the next video by honking their horn. The tablet, of course, is mounted high on the car above the trunk,

so it won't be ruined when people inevitably rear-end your car because they are watching TikTok. Bill did hurry do well enough to win. Well, he did well. He got four right, eight more points for 11, but that means Luke is our champion today. Congratulations. Coming up, our panel's predict, now that we're going back to the moon, what are we going to find there? But first, let me tell you all, wait, wait, don't tell me.

It's a production of NPR and WBZ Chicago, in association with urgent hair cup productions, Doug Berman, Benevolent Overlord. Philip Godica writes our Limericks. Our public address announcer is Paul Friedman. Our tour manager is Shane Adomel, thanks to the staff. and crew at the Studio Baker Theater. BJ Leideman composed our theme. Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills,

Miles, Noriboss, and Lillian King. Special thanks this week to Mahanad al-Shehi and Monica Hickey. Peter Gwynn will defend Gwynnland at all costs. Our visual host is Emma Choi. Technical direction is from Lorna White. Our CFO is Colin Miller.

Our production manager is Robert Newhouse, our senior producer, Ian Chilog, and the executive producer. Wait, wait, don't tell me, is Mike Danforth. And before we leave you this week, we lost. our former senior producer Marad Abed, known to us and all his many friends at NPR News as Rod. Rod led our show in the early years from when it was a struggling show in just a few stations to a mainstay of public radio.

Most importantly, by taking us from recording in a studio each week to in front of a live audience, which is why, in my opinion, we are all still here. So we owe Rod a tremendous debt, and if you enjoy our show, you do too. Now, panel, when we go to the moon again, what are we going to find? Luke Burbeck, a platoon of Scandinavian swimmers. Rachel Kostr. It's already seeing someone. We waited too.

And Harykandibolu. Jimmy Hoffa. And if any of that happens, panel, we'll ask you about it. And wait, wait, wait, no, tell me. Thank you, Bill Curtis. Thanks also to Rachel Koster, Harikandibolu, and Luke. Burbank. Thanks to all of you for listening. I'm Peter Sagan. We'll see you next week. This is NPR.

Cognitive disorders are common among criminal defendants. Many of them would struggle with a basic explanation. And it wouldn't even be, did they do it or not? It would just be like, where were you that day? You're about one pioneering effort to address the needs of those with cognitive disabilities in the criminal justice system. The Sunday story from the Up First podcast, listen now on the NPR app. This week on Consider This, Minneapolis, are federal agents there operating with absolute immunity? The only immunity the officer would have is if he could demonstrate. His actions were necessary and proper to carrying out his federal function.

Listen to consider this. One major news story in 15 minutes every afternoon on the NPR app or wherever you get your podcasts.