Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! - WWDTM: Now With Real Journalists!

Episode Date: January 6, 2024

It's the new year, and we're bringing you new interviews with Rachel Maddow and Bob Woodruff, plus a never-before-heard Bluff the Listener game!Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

From your car radio to your smart speaker, NPR meets you where you are in a lot of different ways. Now, we're in your pocket. Download the NPR app today. From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm the anchorman. Everyone wants to kiss when the ball drops. Bill Curtis. And here's your

host at the Studebaker Theater in the Fine Arts Building in downtown Chicago, filling in for Peter Sagal, it's Naguide Farsage. Thank you, Bill. We spent all of 2023 celebrating our 25th anniversary, but it's the new year, so we're trying something new. This year, we're going to celebrate our 26th anniversary. Gotcha, suckers.

First up, a never-before-heard interview with award-winning journalist Bob Woodruff, who joined us in Ann Arbor in 2023. Peter introduced Bob by telling the story of his injury in Iraq in 2006. A good war correspondent wants to get close to the action, but a great war correspondent gets too close to the action. That's what happened to ABC war correspondent Bob Woodruff in Iraq in 2006, and after recovering from his injuries, he continues to report from around the world and run his Woodruff Foundation to provide support to returning veterans. He joins us now on stage near where he grew up here in Michigan. Bob Woodruff. Welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell. Wait, wait, don't embarrass me, I guess. Sorry, that's not the name of the show. Sorry. So let's start at the beginning. The thing that everybody knows, you famously had a very close call

and a very narrow escape from disaster. You were almost a lawyer. I was a lawyer for four years. You were a lawyer for four years. You went to the University of Michigan Law School. I did. You did. The best in the country. Yeah. And the way I understand it, you were doing law or teaching law or practicing law in China, right? Yeah. I practice for a year in New York and then took a year to teach over there in Beijing in 1988 to 1989. Later I came back and practiced for two more years. Right. But yeah, I stuck with it. And you were

over there and CBS News showed up and they were covering the Tiananmen Square gathering and then eventually what happened and they needed a translator or someone to help out? They wanted somebody as a fixer to get them around to do simple translations, you know, for people on the streets. I worked with Bob Simon, who's about the greatest, you know, foreign reporter I've ever worked with. So I had to translate for him and for Dan Rather, who just showed up in Beijing to cover the story. Yeah. But just watching the reporters,

the way that their job was compared to my job, that I thought, this is unbelievably exciting. And is that how you caught the bug, working with those legends over there? Oh, totally, yeah. I knew nothing about it before. I just happened to have, as a young lawyer in Beijing, I only know two other Americans there. It was a cameraman and a reporter for CBS, because I just met them.

They were out doing a story. And so they just, out of nowhere, my students all left class because they were protesting, and so the school was canceled. And so I had another month to teach, nothing to do. So they asked me if I'd come down and just kind of get the people around town to do interviews. And I said, absolutely. But you went eventually into TV news. I'm surprised because with that hair and jawline, I'm surprised that no one had steered you toward TV news before.

So you became a reporter, but not just a reporter. You ended up, as we all know, being a war correspondent. Did you volunteer for that work? To go to the dangerous places? Yeah. I think, obviously, in many ways, the war coverage came upon us because of 9-11. Right. You know, I was based, we were living over in London,

and I just remember we were watching the TV, and this plane hit the towers. And we thought it was like a Cessna. Yeah. And then suddenly we saw the second one that hit, and then we realized that, oh, my God, this is Osama bin Laden, because we'd covered him for two years, and we knew exactly who it was. And so literally within five hours, I got out of London,

the last BA flight to go to Islamabad. And so we lived in Pakistan for about five weeks till we could finally get in Afghanistan. All right, wait a minute, wait a minute. So the U.S. has been attacked. You knew who did it because you had been covering the story. And you're watching this conflagration on TV and you turn to your wife and you say,

honey, I've got an idea. You know the people who did that? Let's go talk to them. I always thought, like, there's my wife. Oh, he's gone to a very dangerous place. He could be killed. Let me think about this. Let's give it a 50-50.

She would be upset. I mean, of course, when you did get blown up, your wife got one of the greatest pleasures in all marriage, being able to say, I told you so. Yeah, that was probably the 150th one of those. When you woke up, did you have any memory of what happened? The memory that I had was when we were hit, I went unconscious and I literally saw my body kind of floating underneath. And I was up to then I woke up after I fell into the tank and I looked up and I saw

my producer, Vinny Malhotra. And I said, am I, am I still alive? And he said, you're still alive. And then the next thing I woke, woke, remembered was when I suddenly came back to life and I, my younger brother says to me, are you okay? I mean, how was it? I said, I got to say right now, I'm in so much pain. But when I was there, it was white and silent. There was no fear. And I said to him, literally, I said, you know, I got to tell you, I wouldn't mind going back there. Sure. So in some ways, because of this, I think I have way, I don't really have that much fear of death. I have to say, I was thinking about that. I can only imagine, and no shade to my producers who are excellent, but if I was badly wounded,

I think if my producer was the first person to speak to me, they would probably say, we need you to get wounded again. Retake. But could you do it better? Well, Bob Woodruff, it is a pleasure to talk to you in person, and we have asked you here to play a game we're calling, Hey Woodruff,

Here's Some Wood Stuff. Wood stuff. That's right. That's right. You've been through an awful lot, but are you ready for something this dumb? We are going to ask you three questions about stuff

made of wood. Answer two out of three correctly, and you'll win our prize. One of our listeners, the voice of anyone that might choose in their voicemail, Bill, who is Bob Woodruff playing for? Frank Maynard of No Vine, Michigan. All right. You ready?

Kind of, but I'm... Okay. Here's your first question. The first thing to be made of wood, of course, is trees. In 1964... That wasn't the question. This is really hard, yeah. I know. In 1964, a scientist proved that a certain bristlecone pine

was, in fact, the oldest tree on Earth. The same scientist also did what? A, died of splinters after trying to prove that wood could be used as a food, B, invented the pinewood derby, or C, accidentally killed that same bristlecone pine. C. Yes, exactly right. C. Yes, exactly right. How can you get a splinter eating? Yeah, he took a core of the tree's trunk, see, to determine how old it was, and apparently he killed it. He felt bad about it, though.

All right, next question. The George Harrison Memorial Tree was a gorgeous living wood memorial in L.A.'s Griffith Park, but but in 2014 the tree was removed. Why? A. Because all things must pass. B. Because Rolling Stones fans kept peeing on it. Or C. The George Harrison Memorial tree was killed by beetles.

B. No, it was actually killed by beetles. Alright, you have one more chance. You can get it right and win everything. B. No, it actually was killed by beetles. All right. You have one more chance. You can get it right and win everything. Wood is, of course, sustainable, renewable. People are trying to make things out of wood that aren't normally made out of wood,

such as an ambitious project in Japan to make what out of wood? A, candy, B, satellites, or C, submarines. Wow. These are all good inventions. Oh, I got clues. People shouting the answer is not technically a clue.

That is not technically a clue. So, since I had traumatic brain injury, I will accidentally say C. No, no, that was just the, you see, no. All right, let me guess. Because of TBI, we're going to give you another guess. B. Yes, it's B. You see, it's useful. You guys, thank you for the money.

Yes, satellites. Certain woods apparently do well in space, and an added benefit when the satellite, like they all do eventually, you know, the orbit decays and it reenters Earth's atmosphere and burns up, it'll smell really nice. Bill, how did Bob Woodruff do in our quiz? If you think I'm going to ding a wounded war correspondent, you're out of your mind. And I don't

have to. He's a winner. There you are. Two out of three. Success. Bob Woodruff is, and at this point, I think always will be, an award-winning journalist. He is also the founder of the Bob Woodruff Foundation. More info can be found

at bobwoodrufffoundation.org. Bob Woodruff, thank you so much for being with us. And because we had so much fun, here's even more from that show in Ann Arbor. Faith, this week the New York Times reported on a new type of helpful service. You can hire people who will test if your partner, your husband, your wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, whomever, will do what? It involves that noise. Is it like a private detective type of thing?

Something you might want to know that they're doing? Oh, test if they'll flirt? Yes. With someone on social media or something? Exactly. Precisely right. To test if they'll cheat on you. Oh. So say you're worried about the loyalty of your partner. You can go to a site called Loyalty Test. You can hire an attractive person to contact your loved one on social media, slide into their DMs, right? And see how easy it is to tempt them to cheat. This is a huge technological leap over the prior test for cheating, which was just coming home for lunch unannounced. People sign up to do this in sort of the same way people

sign up to be like rideshare drivers, right? And you can go and see a menu of the person you want to test the loyalty of your partner. And they all charge different rates. But you have to be very careful in choosing the right person. Because you can't choose someone so unattractive that it's like not really a test. Of course, they're not going to flirt with that person. But you can't choose somebody so very attractive that you're like, well, honestly, who could blame them?

I hear what you're saying, Peter, and yes, I'll do it. My Instagram handle is at Huge Cordero, and I will be... Huge! When we come back, we talk with Rachel Maddow

on stage at Carnegie Hall. That's when we return with more Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR. It can be hard nowadays to find a space where we're able to listen to each other, where we can agree to disagree. It's why I'm proud of 1A, a show that's made for you and by you. We're not about snark. We're about dialogue. Join the discussion and me, your host, Jen White, by listening to the 1A podcast from WAMU and NPR.

At Planet Money, we take you to the furthest reaches of the global economy. From the currency black markets of Buenos Aires, to the Caribbean island where no one owns property, to the giant underground caves where the U.S. government stored a national cheese supply. Listen to the Planet Money podcast from NPR. Hi, I'm Jen White from 1A. I host a news show for those who need to know what's happening and why it matters. But we get it. The news can weigh you down. It's why we also make time for stories, guests, and surprises that'll lift you up. Listen to the 1A podcast from WAMU and NPR. Hi, I'm Jen White from 1A, the home of good conversation. But what makes it great are the ideas and insights you bring to the show every

day. It seems only fair that when you make room for us, we make room for you. Listen to the 1A podcast from WAMU and NPR. From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis, and here is your host at the Studebaker Theatre in downtown Chicago, filling in for Peter Sagal, the Gein Farsad. Thank you, Bill. It's 2024, and we're starting the year off right by bringing you new material we recorded in 2023, but never aired.

It's the perfect cure for your champagne hangover. Or in my case, Pabst Blue Ribbon Hangover. I like to keep it real. Just this past December, we did a show at Carnegie Hall in New York City, and our guest was MSNBC's Rachel Maddow. You may know her as the person Chris Hayes steals all his glasses from. But first, let's hear the Bluff the Listener game with panelists Karen Chee, Tom Papa, and me. Hi, you are on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Hi, Peter, this is Cory DeMarco from Branchburg in your home state of New Jersey.

Hey, Branchburg, New Jersey. And what do you do there? The last year I've been a domestic engineer for my one-year-old daughter. Oh, really? And I also have a child that age. How have you found it? I'm going to enjoy it a few years when I get back on a good sleep schedule.

There you are, yes. Well, Corey, it's great to have you with us. You're going to play our game on what you must try to tell truth from fiction. Bill, what is Corey's topic? How I made $8.9 million. Being an entrepreneur is hard work. You need to innovate. You need to work long hours, endure failure, but first you have to learn how to spell entrepreneur. Well, this week we heard about an ingenious way somebody made exactly $8.9 million. Our panelists are going to tell you about

it. Pick the one who's telling the truth. You'll win the wait-waiter of your choice on your voicemail. Are you ready to play? Yes, sir. All right. Let's first hear from Nagin Farsad. Playa del Carmen was a typical sleepy Mexican beach town. That is, until it got taken over by hippy-dippy patchouli-scented essential oil-dipped American expats. For local restaurateur Maria Diaz, these people were annoying. They always asked if there was gluten in the corn tortillas. There was an alarming increase in flower crowns. And the most annoying among them believed in the healing power of crystals.

But she was determined to get one over on them by making up a healing crystal. She took pieces of broken margarita glasses, painted them a convincing teal, and named the resulting crystal Roca Tanta, which is Spanish for dumb rock. She claimed that dumb rock, which was priced between $300 and $800 a piece, had the power to reduce people's sensitivity to criticism. After a year, she had made a cool 8.9 million dollars and had happy customers claiming the

crystals helped them, for example, see negative comments on Instagram without getting sad about them. When local officials found out about the scheme, they brought her into the precinct where they high-fived her because they thought it was hilarious. A Mexican entrepreneur makes $8.9 million selling broken margarita glasses back to Americans as healing crystals. Your next moneymaker comes from Karen Chee. The Winnipeg Elementary Lemonade Peeps. Sounds adorable, right? The Winnipeg Elementary Lemonade Peeps. Sounds adorable, right?

You're probably imagining little kids running around, selling lemonades for a quarter, and getting very cute sugar highs. Well, if you thought that, you're wrong. The Winnipeg Elementary Lemonade Peeps, or WELP for short, ran from 2021 until three months ago when they were revealed to be fully grown adults. WELP was composed of adults in their 30s and 40s who got away with scamming people for not just lemonade, but also Girl Scout cookies, friendship bracelets, and fan merch,

all the while pretending to be entrepreneurial children. In 2022, they even released a radio interview where a supposed six-year-old named Sue Ellen Clark said, We look for opportunities to create synergy and seemingly different retail vodices. In hindsight, pretty suspicious. The reason the team of 12 fully grown adults went through all this trouble

is because children don't pay taxes. They kept every Canadian dollar they earned and ended up raking in $8.9 million, which is incidentally way higher than any second grader can count. Some adults in Canada pretend to be children running a conglomerate of child-oriented businesses. Your last road to riches comes from Tom Papa. A group of strongmen in western Indian state of Gujarat set up a fake toll plaza and managed to collect over 8.9 million dollars from unsuspecting commuters. For 18 months, the scammers enticed drivers to

divert their route by offering 50 percent the price of the regular toll plaza. Government officials were shocked that not one of the commuters ever complained about having to pay half the amount of the other toll. Said one commuter, I'd rather give my money to a bunch of criminals because at least they kept their roadways nice and safe. Apparently, the scam was very convincing with proper signage, lights. But the question is, do fake toll collectors fall into the same tropes as the real ones? Such as the extra chatty toll collector who continually tells drivers he's still a million bucks shy of being a millionaire. And maybe one modeled after the toll collectors at the Lincoln Tunnel who play loud music, talk on their phone, and roll their eyes when you try to say hello.

All right. Somebody made a lot of money, specifically $8.1 million in a creative way. Was it from Nagin Farsad, a woman in Playa del Carmen, Mexico, who realized she could sell American tourists almost anything if she promised that they do enough magic. From Karen Chee, some Canadian entrepreneurs who decided that the way to move their retail products was to pretend to be adorable children. Or from

Tom Papa, some enterprising people in India who set up their own toll booth away from the real one and made a lot of money by giving people a discount. Which of these is the real story of business genius we found in the news? Well, Tom Popp has never lied to me before, so I've got to go with the toll booth scandal. All right, you're going to go with Tom's story of the fake toll booth. Well, to bring you the real story, we spoke to someone familiar with it. These guys are accused of setting up a fake toll booth and collecting

fees from drivers. That was Mark Florenfelder from Boing Boing talking about the toll booth to riches in India. Congratulations, Corey. You got it right. You picked Tom's story, earning him a point, but also earning you our invaluable prize. The voice of anyone you might choose. Congratulations. Thank you so much. James, I made it on! Take care! And now it's time for the game we call Not My Job. If I were to introduce our guest today

the way she might do it on her well-known TV program, I would start back in the 19th century with the founding of Stanford University and then move forward to the creation of the National Broadcasting Company by RCA in 1926 and then note the wedding mass celebrated by one Robert Maddow and Elaine Goss in the late 1960s. But frankly, who's got that kind of time? Rachel Maddow, welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Thank you so much. Thank you. Wow. I just wanted to do one of those Maddow wind-ups, just go way

back and then run forward and jump into it. And now we have to do a pharmaceutical ad. I know. You are a big star in the world of cable TV news. It is my understanding that that was not ever the plan, right? No, I'm not a planner. I didn't have any plan of any kind, especially this. Right. Everybody, we heard that back in college at Stanford, everybody thought you'd be a professor because you were, to use a term that I think is an approbation in these circles, an egghead. A little bit of a dork.

A little bit of a dork. Yes. When I met my partner, Susan, the only reason she was interested in me, I think, is because she thought I was going to be a professor and therefore she thought that her partner might have access to a pool. That's like three-dimensional chess relationship-wise. Yeah. I don't suppose 30 Rock has a pool, right? Nope. She's out of luck. Damn it. She really miscalculated. Yeah. I don't suppose 30 Rock has a pool, right? Nope. She's out of luck. No, she really miscalculated. Yeah. So how did you stumble into broadcasting? I was finishing my dissertation, living with friends, totally broke.

And I got a job as the news girl on a morning zoo radio show. You are kidding me. No, it was a live on the air audition. And I got hired on the spot and started the next day. And how did you fit in in the whole Morning Zoo crew type ethos? Well, one of the things that happened on our Morning Zoo show,

it's called the Dave in the Morning Show. Sure. And we used to write jingles for local businesses. Oh, wow. Yeah. I think I speak for your international fandom to ask, can you still do a jingle? I remember bits of them.

For example, it's not just for Cinco de Mayo, so put on a suit and a tie-o. I don't remember how that one started. There was something about, you can't borrow my chainsaw. Somewhere on Route 9, get yourself a chainsaw because you sure ain't using mine. Green Mountain Power, out in Florence, Mass, we give you the power

to cut your freaking grass. I do remember some. I don't know. I don't know what the economics are like at MSNBC, but you guys could consider doing that for like Archer Daniels Midland for their ads, you know? That's amazing. And so did you realize that you loved it or that you were good at it or that people, I mean?

I did really enjoy it. I did it for exactly one year, 365 days, and then I went back to graduate school to defend my dissertation. With a jingle, I hope. What was your dissertation in? It was on AIDS in prison. So there's not very many good songs about that. Well, I was going to suggest coming up with a funny jingle, but I guess not.

But I defended my dissertation. And then two weeks later, 9-11 happened. And I found myself regretful of the fact that I had given up my job, my little tiny job, reading the news. And I actually called a different local station and asked if I could fill in for free on the morning show. And then I moved to Air America Radio. And then things started off. And here we are.

Do you remember what it was like to transition from radio to TV? Something I've never dared to do. I have never really admitted to myself that anybody can see me when I'm on television. In my mind, it's just me and a microphone. If you think about it, you can't see them. So it wouldn't be fair if they could see you. Ding! Right.

Exactly. I wear the same clothes every day. Right. There's nobody else in the room except for a nice lady named Jackie who stands next to the camera. And I don't pay very much attention to what the visuals are on the screen, and I just think about the script. Right.

Does it ever get intense? Because I know people look to you not just for information and analysis, but for kind of hope. Do people come up to you and, like, laden you with that? Because that'd be a lot. It's, yeah, I don't, I don't feel beleaguered by it or anything. I have nothing to complain about at all. I do sometimes worry when people say that I am the thing that gives them hope. Right. I just think, wow, that is a gossamer thread. Yeah. Because I'm just a person who talks about the news on television, like you should have other

resources. So yeah, I worry about people thinking I can do more than I can. Right. Since so many people look to you for comfort, I wanted to ask you about the things you do for comfort. Yes. I understand you've become quite the fisher person. Yes, I do it a lot, but I'm bad at it. Really? Yes. What kind of fishing? All the fishing. All the fishing.

I will do any kind of fishing. I don't like to keep the fish. I always put the fish back. But other than that, I'll do anything. Really? So you do your fly fishing? Fly fishing, spin fishing, ice fishing. I love ice fishing.

Ice fishing is my favorite kind of fishing. So you're telling me that if I'm out there, like in the mountains of the Berkshires, and there's a frozen lake, I can look out there, and there's a huddled person sitting there next to a hole in the ice, it could be you? Yes. Wow.

Yes, staring into a hole, happier than I am at any other time of the year. Really? Yes. I could do this all day. But we do have business to do. You have a new book out called Prequel, which is about the pro-fascist movement in America.

But since you have written a book called Prequel, yes, we have asked you to play a game we're calling The Worst Prequel of Them All. Meaning, what do you know about the phantom menace star wars episode one oh no right oh no so we're if your job is to answer two or three questions correctly about the phantom menace oh no you don't you know i saw the first Star Wars movie when I was four, and that's the only Star Wars movie I have ever seen. And the only time I've ever seen that one. Do you know what they're about?

They're about, like, war. And stars. I can do this. Okay. Bill, who is Rachel Maddow playing for? Lee Woodyer of New York City, who is celebrating his 60th birthday with us here at Carnegie Hall. Here's your first question.

Now, we all know, you may remember this. Remember the lightsaber fights in Star Wars? The swords? You remember this. Well, you have to have lightsaber fights, and they had them in The Phantom Menace, but they were hard to get right when they were filming. Why?

A, all the lightsabers had been thrown out when Lucasfilm moved their offices in 1994. B, actor Ewan McGregor, who played Obi-Wan, kept making lightsaber noises with his mouth, which were really hard to remove in post-production. Or C, George Lucas insisted that the actors fight with real lightsabers?

I'm gonna go with B. B is the answer. Ewan McGregor. Wow. You would know this if you were that kind of nerd rather than the brainiac. But it is literally impossible to pick up

anything, even a flashlight and not go. And Ewan McGregor could not stop himself from doing that. And they had to erase it. Okay. The movie sets were built only to be as high as the actor's heads, right? Because the rest of the expanse of whatever room they were in would be created digitally later.

Right. But there was an unexpected problem with that supposedly money-saving technique. What was it? A, Liam Neeson, who was in the film, was so tall that he cost the set crew an extra $150,000 in construction costs. B, George Lucas said the doors will be CGI too, so the construction crew did not put any openings in the wall for the actors to walk through. Or C, whenever an actor ran on the set, his head would bounce too high and disappear. We think it's Liam Neeson. You're right, that's true.

This is great. I love this. I love that you're answering this as a collective. Yes. So appropriate for you MSNBC people. This is the most liberal collective thing I've ever done. I know. All right. Last question. The parts of the movie that were not shot on digital sets were made in the deserts of Tunisia, where it got so hot that what happened on set? A, the actors playing Jedi Knights demanded and got air conditioners put under their robes.

B, Natalie Portman and the other actors actually fried an egg on top of R2-D2. Or C, they needed four standby actors ready to get into the metal C-3PO costume because they kept passing out. Oh, wow. Oh, wait a minute, wait a minute. Trust your feelings, Rachel Maddow. All right, I'm going to go with air conditioners. No, it was actually the fried egg. Oh, you're kidding. Yes, they did.

An actor named Ahmed Best, who was in the movie, said that they did that, and as far as we know, he had nothing else to do with the film. Bill, how did Rachel Maddow do in our quiz? How could we make Rachel anything more than a champion? Rachel Maddow is the host of The Rachel Maddow Show on MSNBC. And her new book, Prequel, debuted at number one at the New York Times bestseller list. Rachel Maddow, thank you so much for joining us on Way, Way, Don't Tell Me.

When we come back, NBA legend Damian Lillard and country music's Brad Paisley. That's when we return with Way, Way, Don't Tell Me from NPR. At the Planet Money podcast, we talk to anyone who can help us understand the economy. Fortune tellers, tango dancers. Obscure government bureaucrats. Oh, the obscure ones are the best. Totally. And of course, we talk to the smartest economists to explain everything from inflation and disinflation to how manatees got addicted to fossil fuel. That is Planet Money from NPR.

Planet Money helps NPR. On It's Been a Minute, we talk to up-and-comers and icons of culture. From Barbra Streisand. You're such a wonderful interviewer. To Tracee Ellis Ross. Your questions were so wonderful. And Christine Baranski. Oh, thank you for your wonderful questions. Here are the questions these icons loved to be asked. Listen every week to It's Been a Minute from NPR. From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis, and here is your host at the Studebaker Theater in downtown Chicago, filling in for Peter Sagal, Nagin Farsad. Thanks, Bill. One of the joys of taking our show on the

road, besides overeating local delicacies like fried pickles, is inviting local legends onto the stage and watching the audience absolutely freak out when they see them. My favorite part of Wait, Wait Road Trips, I get to be the DJ. Hope you all enjoy my new playlist, Bill Curtis' Sultry Slow Jam. This past year, we gave audiences plenty of reasons to lose their minds. First in Nashville, where we were joined by country music star Brad Paisley. Peter asked Brad if his kids were fans of his music. I would say they have their moments.

Like the other day, there was a song they weren't familiar with, and they went back and listened to it. They said, what's that one about? I said, I don't know. Go listen to it. So we listened to it in the kitchen, and Huck, my oldest, said, well, they can't all be gems. So no, they're not impressed. No, they're not impressed. And your kids believe, I'm sure, that all of your love songs, of which you have some great ones, were all about their mother, right? So does she.

But many of them are, right? And is that like, I mean, it's weird, right? Because you're writing about the person you live with. And is she cool with that? Does she like them? She was in the beginning. And then after a while, I started to get a little more realistic with some of the lyrics. And, you know, I had a hit on a song that I wrote about her recently that I came to find out she does not care for.

Really? Yeah. How did you find out? Yeah. Well, we were in the kitchen and she was joking around about these songs that some of them, like lately, I've written some funny ones about arguments and, you know, leaving her to go fishing and whatever. And there's elements of truth in these. And then I had one that's a very touching love song. And she's like, yeah, I never cared for that.

And I said, why? She's like, it's not true. There's no way that... She's like, you just wanted a hit song on that. So she's probably right. But still, it's like... One of the things I love about your songs hit song on that. She's probably right, but still. One of the things I love about your songs is I find them genuinely funny. Ticks is a

great, funny song. It's a public service announcement is what it is. Lyme disease is real. For people who don't know it, can you do the chorus of Ticks? I'd like to see you out in the moonlight. I'd like to see you out in the moonlight. I'd like to, I don't even know him.

I'd like to kiss you way back in the sticks. I'd like to walk you through a field of wildflowers. And I'd like to check you for ticks. You have a lot of fans. I mean, Taylor Swift has Swifties. Lady Gaga, Little Monsters. Is there a nickname for your fans? Let's come up with one.

All right. What about Tix? The Tix? What's Tix? Brad's Tix. Show me your Tix. Show me my Tix. There we are.

Well, Brad Paisley, I can't tell you what a thrill it is to talk to you here in Nashville. I can't quite believe I got to do it. I can't believe I'm on this show. Something you and I have in common. But we have asked you here to play a game that this time we're calling... Welcome to Paisley Park, Paisley, Brad. Okay. So Paisley Park, as I'm sure you know, was the studio that the musician Prince built for himself. Right.

In Minnesota. Today it's a popular tourist attraction there. We're going to ask you three questions about Paisley Park. If you answer two of them correctly, you'll win our prize for one of our listeners. Bill, who is Brad Paisley playing for? Jonathan Craig of Nashville, Tennessee. All right. He's out there somewhere. I guess I have to ask because it's more than likely, did you ever meet Prince in your travels? I never did. No. Really? That seems a shame. That is a

shame. I would have loved to have served him papers on the name of that studio. Yeah, I know. the name of that studio. Yeah, I know. All right. Here is your first question. Prince, of course, no longer in residence, but a visitor who was there in 2018

was lucky enough to meet one of his artistic collaborators. He was living there. Was it A, the valet whose sole job was to lift Prince in and off

his platform shoes? B, a pair of doves who are credited musicians on one of his albums, or see the lighting technician whose job was to match the color of Prince's aura of the moment. All three of those are compelling. They really are. I think it's the lighting technician.

But what about those doves? Were there real doves on it? There were? Oh, shoot. This is so important. I'm going to listen to the brain trust to my left here and go with Doves. That's right. Yes.

Wow. The Doves were named Divine and Majesty and are credited musicians on the album One Night. Wow. Okay. All right. Okay, next question. For the ticket price, visitors get a hands-on experience at Paisley Park when they are allowed to do what? A, play ping pong in the very ping pong table

on which Prince once humiliated Michael Jackson in a game. B, use Prince's own hot iron to brand yourself with his famous glyph. Or C, use the microwave where he himself used to heat up his frozen pizza. I think we're going to, yeah, let's go with the Michael Jackson ping pong table. That's right.

Yeah. Here's your last question. Alright. Prince was not the only person to record at Paisley Park. Remarkable recording studio. Other artists used it like R.E.M., the Bee Gees, and Once Who. A. Rob Zombie. B. The Morbin it like R.E.M., the Bee Gees, and Once Who. A. Rob Zombie,

B. The Morbin Tabernacle Choir, or C. The Hormel Chili Company. See? Are they based in Minneapolis? They are. I will tell you Hormel is based in Minnesota. Then I bet it is because I could

see the ad exec right now saying, we've got Princess Studio on. You're right. Yes! How about that? I'm excited to hear what your prize is. Three for three. Speaking of television commercials, in which I've seen you sing jingles,

could you do a good jingle for, like, Chili? Chili? Sure, absolutely. It's, if you're going to eat tonight, you know what you need to do. Get yourself a spoon and eat the musical soup. I could go on, but let's not. How did Brad Paisley do on our quiz? Perfect!

Perfect! Wow! Of course he did! In that and in all things, Brad Paisley's new single, Same Here, featuring President Zelensky of Ukraine, is out now. Brad Paisley, thank you so much

for being with us here in Nashville on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Thank you so much for being with us here in Nashville. I'm way, way, don't tell me. Thank you. The biggest presidential primary day in this campaign cycle, Super Tuesday. Will the Republican nominee be settled after these votes? Check out the NPR Politics Podcast for all the news you need about what happens when voters have their say. NPR brings you the updates you need on the day's biggest headlines. The Senate narrowly passed the debt ceiling bill that will prevent the country from defaulting on

its loans. Stories from across the world. Knowing how to forage and to live with the land is integral to Amis culture. And down your block. From CPR News, this is Colorado Matters. And you can find all of that and more in your pocket. Download the NPR app today. Finally, when we brought our show to Portland, Oregon in July of last year,

we knew we had to invite NBA legend Damian Lillard. For 11 seasons, he was the cornerstone of the Portland Trailblazers. Peter began by asking Damian how he got started playing basketball. I started playing basketball because I actually faked sick one day from going to school. Really? And so did my older brother and my older cousin, who's like my brother. It was like, all right, everybody just stay home. So we outside in the front yard, and they playing on our basket, on our hoop.

And once I saw them, I was like, you know, show me. So they started showing me crossovers, how to shoot. They lowered the basket so I could dunk, and I was like, I automatically took interest in it. Really? But I was bad. Is the moral of the story definitely fake sick, kids of America? Fake sick. My stomach hurts.

How old were you when this day happened? At this time, I was like seven. And then I became passionate about it. I would work on it by myself. I would go out there and shoot dribble I would go to the park yeah and and that was when it started was there a moment was there a moment when you like knew okay I am good at this this is something I can do was your high school team was it like in the playground in Oakland where was it uh I would say my sophomore

year in college I went to Weber State University so? I would say my sophomore year in college. I went to Weber State University. So when I got there, I was like, people don't go to the NBA for a year. I mean, you were not one of those kids who was recruited by all the powerhouses. No, not at all. Not at all. So you're at Weber State. It's in Ogden, Utah.

Ogden, Utah. We read that when you were at Weber State, you had a trainer who's still with you. You still work with him, right? Which is pretty cool. That's been for some years. And we also read that every Sunday, you would go with him to Famous Dave's Barbecue. That's true. Right?

So when you were drafted by the Portland Trailblazers, did you immediately check if there was a Famous Dave's? I'm going to tell you a funny story. Please. So I was known in college for being cheap. did you immediately check if there was a Famous Dave's? I'm going to tell you a funny story. Please. So I was known in college for being cheap. Really? Like I used coupons. I was great value everything.

So Famous Dave's was like a nice restaurant that I knew. I looked at that as like a nice establishment. So when I got drafted here, I looked at that as like a nice establishment. So when I got drafted here, I looked for two restaurants. Wingstop Wingstop and Famous Dave's. And there's actually a Famous Dave's right down the street

from the practice facility. And you didn't know that? Did you coupon at Famous Dave's? I didn't. I could afford it. It was a little bit different. So you also have a remarkable career as a rapper. You had a kind of rap battle with Shaquille O'Neal. I did. Shaq Diesel?

Yeah, Shaq Diesel. So if you don't mind, I got to ask you about that. How do you get into a rap battle with Shaquille O'Neal? I did a podcast in New York, and they asked me who's the best athlete rapper of all time and I said me. And he saw that interview and like he started dissing me. Like in a song. He made a whole song dissing me. Really? So we went at it. Right. That was it. So you recorded a song, and this is just one of the many verses from that. Loved you when you was in beast mode. Low-key thought you was a cheat code.

Know that you shoot for the cheap hoes. Shooting need work like your free throws. That's. That's. It's a diss. It's a diss It's a diss You have to diss I'm sorry I don't even know the man

And I'm like that's low That's hitting him where it hurts man Where do things stand between you and Shaq after all this We actually started doing a song We started trying to do music together Oh that's cool We did a collaboration on a shoe and everything. So it wasn't personal like that.

I just was like, why not do some lyrical sparring? No, no. Why not? Well, Damian Lillard, it is an absolute thrill to talk to you and have you with us. And we are going to have you play a game. And this time, we are calling the game... Buzzard Beaters meet Buzzard Eaters. So you're famous for buzzard beaters, those last-minute shots.

We're going to ask you three questions about eating like a buzzard. That is the fine art of dining on roadkill. Who came up with that? Well, I know. So if you answer two out or three questions about this, you will win our prize for a listener who will get, as their prize, the voice of anyone they may choose on their voicemail. Bill, who is Damian Lillard playing for? Jasper Hanley of Portland, Oregon.

Yeah, okay. Ready? Okay. First question. Every year, roadkill enthusiasts gather in Marlinton, West Virginia, for the Roadkill Cooking Festival. And in the competitions, they get points deducted for things like which of these? A, gravel in the meat.

Jeez. B, visible tire marks, or C, if the autopsy reveals the animal died of old age? I'm going to go with gravel in the meat. That's right. Yeah, gravel in the meat. Be careful.

That was the easy one. Choose slowly. Okay, here's the easy one. I believe we refer to that in your field as a layup. It's a layup. Yeah, yeah. All right, second question. A Texas man came up with a roadkill recipe

called Stripped and Shaved Cajun Beaver Tail, and that recipe got him some special recognition. What? A, he became the commercial pitchman for Hormel Chili. B, he catered a dinner for the governor of Texas. Or C, he got a spot competing on the TV show MasterChef. I'm going to go with C. You're right.

Yeah, that's what happened. Sadly. He didn't win. He did not win. He did not make it past the third episode. But all right, last question. Roadkill is a problem everywhere. People don't want it.

Many places, of course, post deer crossing road signs in attempt to prevent roadkill. But one North Dakota woman demanded they be removed from the highways in her state. Why? A, a charging deer had once knocked her over while she was hiking and she wanted revenge. B, as a self-described grammar nerd, she did not like that the signs did not say deer's crossing.

Or C, as she said, quote, why are we encouraging deer to cross at the interstate? Unquote. Does any, have anybody heard of this story? Is that why y'all so nervous? All right, see. See, it is, see, yes. You heard it as we heard of it. She, in her life, she had hit three deers with her car herself.

She was sick of it. And apparently she thought it was because the deer read the signs, deer crossing, and said to themselves, I guess we cross here, guys. Let's go. Bill, how did Damien Lillard do on our quiz? Perfect. Damien Lillard is a seven-time NBA All-Star and the all-time leading scorer in Trailblazers history. His fifth album, Don Dala, will be out later this summer. Damian Lillard, thank you so much for joining us on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

That's it for our first show of 2024 and the last show of our 26th anniversary celebration. Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions' Doug Berman Benevolent Overlord. Philip Godeke writes our limericks. Our public address announcer is Paul Friedman. Our tour manager is Shana Donald. Thanks to the staff and crew at the Studebaker Theatre.

BJ Lederman composed our theme. Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dornbos, and Lillian King. Our vibe curator is Emma Choi. Special thanks to Monica Hickey. Peter Gwynn is live in Times Square taking shots with Andy Cohen. Technical direction, Lorna White. Our CFO is Colin Miller.

Our production manager is Robert Newhouse. Our senior producer is Ian Chilag. The executive producer of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is Mike Danforth. Thanks to everyone you heard, all our panelists, all our guests, and of course, Bill Curtis. And thanks to all of you for listening. I'm Nagin Farsad, and the show will be back next week. This is NPR. This is NPR.

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