Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! - WWDTM: Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe

Episode Date: October 26, 2024

This week, sports power couple Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe talk about their podcast, who's more competitive, and where they keep their medalsLearn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

Support for this podcast and the following message comes from Dignity Memorial. When your celebration of life is prepaid today, your family is protected tomorrow. Planning ahead is truly one of the best gifts you can give your family. For additional information, visit DignityMemorial.com. From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. Get out your diaper cream, I am the voice as smooth as a baby's butt. I'm Bill Curtis and here is your host at the Studebaker Theater at the Fine Arts Building in Chicago, Illinois,

filling in for Peter Segal, Dulce Sloan. It's to me! Thank you! Thank you, Bill, and thanks everybody. We have a great show for you today. Now, I know some of y'all are wondering, how does she get this job filling in for Peter Segal? y'all are wondering how did she get this job filling in for Peter Sagal? I mean well who knew that a man who runs so much couldn't beat me in a leg wrestling

match? Later on we'll be talking to sports power couple Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe about their new podcast A Touch More. But, it's your turn to touch us more. I'm single. By giving us a call, the number is 888-wait-wait. That's 888-924-8924. Now let's welcome our first listener contestant. Hi, you're on, wait, wait, don't tell me. Hi, my name is Katie Peele

and I'm calling from Denver, Colorado. Now what do you do in this here Denver, Colorado up there in the mountains where you can't breathe? Well, I am a recently resigned public school teacher and I manage a small coffee shop in a farm-to-table restaurant. Ooh, okay. That's very Colorado. Very NPR. Well, Katie Hager, hey! Let me introduce you to our panel.

First is a comedian performing soon in Sunnyvale, California, and eerie PA and host of the Trivia Podcast, Go Fact Yourself airing now on LAS Public Radio, it's Helen Hall! Next, a comedian will be part of Kyle Kanaan's Kanaan's Giving Show on November 27th at the Talia Hall in Chicago is Adam Burks. Hello Katie. And the comedian who will be at Helium Comedy Club in Philadelphia November 9th through the 11th is Alonzo Boatis. Hello Katie. Hey girl, welcome to the show Katie.

Now you're going to play Who's Bill this time. Bill Curtis is going to read you three quotes from this week's news. If you can correctly identify or explain two of them, you'll win our prize, any voice from our show you choose on your voicemail. You ready? Yep. Okay. Here's your first quote.

All the single ladies, all the single ladies, all the single ladies, all the single ladies. That was somebody. Adding her name to the many celebrities endorsing Kamala Harris this week. Who was it? Beyonce. Beyonce! With less than two weeks till election day, the celebrity endorsements are rolling in. Harris has now wrapped up Beyonce, Eminem, Taylor Swift, and Bruce Springsteen, while Trump has earned the endorsements of Joe Exotic from Tiger King and a bunch of people on Jeffrey Epstein's flight dossier. And it's not officially an endorsement. Beyonce just appeared at a Kamala Harris rally

in Houston yesterday. It was a move. Beyonce just appeared at a Kamala Harris rally in Houston yesterday. It was a move that she said, I support Kamala, but not enough to fly to Pennsylvania. And that is my Beyonce impression. I love that because they keep saying, oh, it's unofficial. It's unofficial. Like really, really Beyonce is unofficially endorsing Kamala. Come on, I think we're a little bit past coy.

What if she was a big RFK person? What if Beyonce was like, I don't know, there's just something about it. That's the question. Where's the surprise? Is anyone surprised that Beyonce is supporting Kamala Harris? Only people who are surprised are the people who still claim to be undecided.

Those geniuses who are like, oh well, if Beyonce's involved, maybe I can make a decision. I mean, what other endorsement? Let's see, who else could there be? Well, we did have a very, according to my notes, this week we also got the October surprise, the endorsement that could change the race. Now Kamala Harris, this is true true got the endorsement of wait for it the insane clown posse You're like, you know, things are getting crazy when shaggy too dope is out here calling for a saner clown posse

All right. All right, don't say you back me into a corner. I Alonzo Bowden, now officially endorse Kamala Harris. Thank you! Oh! I'm in. Alonzo. I'm in. I'm shocked. I'm in.

I was at the edge of my seat the entire time. I know. I know, Violet. You can relax. I didn't even know you were a Juggalo. But... And didn't... Trump got a huge endorsement this week.

Trump was endorsed by E. Coli. Oh, yeah! He was pretending to work at that McDonald week. Trump was endorsed by E. Coli. Oh yeah, he was pretending to work at that McDonald's. Yeah, and five days after he worked at McDonald's, E. Coli was like, well if you let him in, you can't let us in. All right, Katie, here's our next quote. Are you sure? Would you like three more months at half price?

Those are questions we may never see again. Thanks to a new federal ruling making it easier to do what? I'm not sure. I have a hint. OK, I can give you a hint. Say you want to stop the gym. You know how Planet Fitness will con you into thinking you're going to come back?

the gym. Like you know how Planet Fitness will con you into thinking you're going to come back? This new law will make it easier for you to not have to eat donuts in a gym. Gym members? You know what, Katie? You were close enough. It's cancel subscription. Cancel subscription. The new law is called click to cancel. It requires that you be able to cancel a subscription the same way you signed up for it. Right? This is the kind of news that is going to have million Americans going, wait, I subscribe to Peacock? So this works, so this allows you to cancel the same way you signed up. So do I have to be drunk?

I think that's between you and your God. Because under the rule, if you sign up with one click, you have to be able to cancel with one click. So you just look for a little button on the screen that's like a little puppy that says, but if you cancel, I'll stop. Now do you have to subscribe to click to cancel in order to click to cancel? That's going to be the next thing. Are you subscribed to click to cancel?

No, well then you can't click to cancel. I don't know if we've hit that rabbit hole yet. Can they just have a button to tell Duolingo just to calm the hell down? I'll learn French in my own time. Just stop yelling at me. All right, Katie, here's your last quote. For Fonder Farewells, please use the parking lot. That is a new sign at an airport in New Zealand, the first in the world to institute a rule

limiting what to three minutes or less. Like a goodbye hug? Yes! Yes! Fighting the delays caused by long goodbyes, an airport in New Zealand is now limiting hugs in the drop-off zone to three minutes or less. So get ready to look over from that long hug and see a TSA agent standing there with a stopwatch and a table.

They're going to regret the specificity of that language, of that word hug, when people are like, well, technically we're having sex. I'm not. My arms aren't anywhere near her. Well, still you can get done in three minutes if you've got a fight. My thing is, and I don't know what airports, I guess it's different in New Zealand, any airport I've been to, you can't have your car parked in front for three minutes. You stop and that cop's like, wait a minute, keep moving, keep moving.

Yeah. I mean, I would love to meet the bitter, lonely, can't get a ride to the airport ass person who came up with this. This is from an airport in New Zealand, which I feel like this is so off-brand for New Zealand that I'm convinced this is one airport official in New Zealand who just has a really clinging mother. He's just like, honey. And he's like, mom, I know, but the rules and also I can't feel my left shoulder anymore. I'm sorry, I have to go. It could be the fact that every flight from New Zealand is so long that you got to say

goodbye like, you know, I may never see you again. You're about to board this 19-hour flight for civilization. Oh like Flying Spirit Airlines. It's like this hug won't be long. Because I might not make it out of the bad neighborhood that is this plane. A three-minute long hug is a really long hug. No it's not! Yes it is!

What is wrong with y'all? Three minutes is not a long time! I'm going to give you a really long hug. No, it's not! What is wrong with y'all? Three minutes is not a long time! You can microwave two frozen burritos in three minutes. Do you know how much you can get done in three minutes? That is an epic hug, three minutes. All right. Bill, how did Katie do on our quiz?

She's a champion. She got them all right. Yay! Yay! Woo! Woo! Go, Katie. Go, Katie. Good going, Katie. Don't worry, Katie.

I do your voicemail, girl. All right. Thank you so much. Thank you. The clock is ticking. I think we're out of time. Right now panel time for you to answer some questions from this week's news. All right now Alonzo if you work in New York City a new bill says that you can use a sick

day not just when you're sick but also when you're what is sick. Your dog your pet. Yes! Absolutely. When your dog is sick. A New York City Councilman is introducing a law that would require employers to let people use sick days if their dog is sick. Now, it makes sense because you don't want to be the guy in the office who gave everybody

heartworms. Well, this is an interesting law in New York because they're New Yorkers. If a New Yorker calls in sick and you say, what's wrong with you? You get none of your business. I'm sick. And they go on about their day. Do you have to prove, like, do you have to get on a Zoom call with your boss and hold up, you know, buddy? And buddy's just like... And what if it's one of those breeds that always looks sick? Yeah.

Like a Frenchie or something that's just like... And you're like, see? He can't even breathe. Come on. Also... I don't know about all these anti-dog people, but if my dog is sick, I ain't showing up. Yeah, all right alright, we're clapping that because that's the most American nonsense I've ever heard.

Sick days for dogs and Amazon employees don't get any. If I was an Amazon employee I would start dressing up like a Shih Tzu just so I could get a couple of days off. Coming up, our panelists send their greetings in our Love to Listener game. Call 1-888-WAITWAIT to play. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from MPR'Us! This message comes from Wyze, the app for doing things in other currencies. Send, spend, or receive money internationally and always get the real-time mid-market exchange rate with no hidden fees. Download the Wyze app today or visit Wyze.com, T's and C's apply. Support for this podcast and the following message comes from Dignity Memorial. When Bye. Autograph Collection Hotels, offering over 300 independent hotels around the world, each exactly like nothing else.

Hands selected for their inherent craft, each hotel tells its own unique story through distinctive design and immersive experiences, from medieval falconry to volcanic wine tasting. Autograph Collection is part of the Marriott Bonvoy portfolio of over 30 hotel brands around the world. Find the unforgettable at autografecollection.com. When voters talk during an election season, we listen. We ask questions, we follow up, and we bring you along to hear what we learned.

Get closer to the issues, the people, and your vote at the NPR Elections Hub. Visit npr.org slash elections. visit npr.org slash elections. and Helen Hong. And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theatre in Chicago, Illinois. Filling in for Peter Segel, it's Dulce Sloan. Thank you. Right now it's time for the Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

Love the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAITWAIT to play our game on air or check out the pinned post on our Instagram page at WaitWaitMPR. Hi, you're on WaitWait, don't tell me! Hi, this is Kristen from Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh! I've been to Pittsburgh! What you doing, Pittsburgh girl? I'm a high school teacher and in my spare time I volunteered at a cat rescue called Pittsburgh Cats. Yeah! That's right.

Thank you for helping the kitty cats. So nice to have you, Kristen. Now, you're going to play our game in which you must try to tell truth from fiction. What's the topic, Bill? Greeting cards in the news. Ooh, greeting cards, the perfect way to tell someone you do care about them, but not enough to send an actual gift. Our panelists are going to tell you about an incident involving a greeting card that

made the news this week. Pick the one who's telling the truth and you'll win our prize, the weight-weighter of your choice on your voicemail. Are you ready to play, Kristin? I am ready. Hey, first up, it's Helen Hall. Getting laid off is never fun. But getting laid off and not even getting a goodbye

card from your coworkers, well, that's just criminal. That's what a woman claimed in court when she sued British Airlines for not giving her a farewell card when she left the company. The cardless woman who happened to be named Karen, was so offended that she took legal action. Cardless Karen and the obviously not great lawyer who took on her case had a rude awakening in court

when a former colleague testified that they did buy a card, but they didn't give it to her because only three people signed it. Awkward. Undaunted, Cardless Karen is now preparing lawsuits against a busload of strangers who didn't all say bless you after she sneezed. A greeting card lawsuit from Helen Hong. Your next noteworthy note card comes from Adam Burke. Nothing says you care for someone like a homemade greeting card and nothing says you really

care for them like getting a professional to make it for you. But not everyone can afford their own writers and artists, which is where bespoke greeting card startup Heart Murmurs comes in. The Iowa-based company seeks to automate the process by using AI to write and design cards tailored to your loved ones. Explains founder Hans Bowman, for our initial testing, we wanted to see what we get with zero human intervention. It was here the limitations started to show, with participant Lisa Crowther having to apologize

to her 72-year-old mother after the latter received a godly decorated card that read, roses are red and neither are you. F. Patrick Mahomes, you're 72. As Bowman explains, the AI scrubs your social media to sound more like you, so if you say a lot of profane things about the chiefs, that might come up. Even more bizarre were some of the attempts at festive missives, with one Ellis Hoskins getting a card reading, Happy Holidays, Ellis, Santa is coming for you. There is no escape.

Ho ho ho. Clearly we've got some work to do, says Bowman. All right. Going a little too far from Adam Burke, and your last story of some paper in the paper comes from Alonzo Bowden. When Motor Week magazine writer Peter Seek finally met with the famous Airbags car club in Detroit It wasn't just their collection of old cars that stood out. It was their collection of greeting cards What's with all the cards? Well founding Airbags member Gonzo Raymond isn't just the owner of a 1963 Impala convertible

He's also the owner of some very passionate opinions about e-cards Turns out he hates them. So everyone started sending him cards. Not just birthday and Christmas cards, cards for everything. Did you know April 14th is National Ex-Spouse Day? January 21st is Squirrel Appreciation Day? National Left-Handers Day is August 13th. They even got him a card for nothing on January 16th,

because that's National Nothing Day. Okay, Kristin. You've got Helen's story about a woman suing for not getting a fail-well card, only to realize she had one it was just too pathetic to give to her. Adam's story about an AI company writing cards that are a little too personal. And from Alonzo Boden, e-cars turn an old car collector into a greeting card collector. Which story is the real story? Okay, this is pretty tough, but I think

I'm going to go with Adam's story because as a teacher I encounter a lot of bad AI sometimes from students who are rushed to get an assignment in. Oh, okay. Well to find out the correct answer we spoke to someone covering the real story. They discovered that the company had a card for Karen, but only two or three people were actually willing to sign it. Oh. That was Allison Levens from the Hammer and Nigel show, talking about the real story of the card

no one wanted to sign. I'm sorry, Kristen, but Helen had the real answer. That's OK. But Helen had the real answer. That's okay. I'm sorry you didn't win, but you did earn a point for Adam. Thank you for playing with us. Goodbye. Thank you. Thank you. Bye. And now it's time for a game we call Not My Job.

Basketball and soccer legends Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe are a true sports power couple with seven Olympic medals, countless championships, and a presidential medal of freedom between them. Oh, where y'all keep all these medals at? They're also the hosts of A Touch More, a show about women's sports that's given their track record, will probably be the first podcast to win a Nobel Prize. Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe, welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me! Okay, so since y'all got all these accolades, do you prefer legends or ghosts? Like how do you like to be referred to? Legend.

Legend. Okay. That's classy. So, I do have a question about y'all's classy. I do have a question about your podcast. It's called A Touch More, correct? Now I wanna know how did you shift the podcast from like a tipsy Instagram live to like a full podcast? Well, we took out the tipsy part that helps.

Got a couple of Google Docs going and that's basically it. That's basically it. That's basically it. We're pretty much doing the same thing. We have no idea what we're doing. Sam's the tipsy. I know. We're like, who gave us these jobs?

We did. So Ms. Sue, who's a dream guest for the podcast? A dream guest? I mean, we wouldn't mind having Kamala Harris on, so that would be nice. This is Megan. Crane for President Harris. Have you called Beyonce because she knows her? She's got an N.

Yeah. I'll text her when we're done. Hey Beyonce, we need Ms. Harris' number. Thank you. OK, now I do have some questions. Y'all are just like this super sports power couple, just the strongest calves of any relationship. I do have a question, since y'all are just these iconic

legends of sports. Do you remember watching each other play before y'all met each other? Were y'all fans of each like before y'all met each other? Were y'all fans of each other before y'all met? Megan? Megan says yes. Megan watched me in college. How do we feel about this?

I do wonder, like, are y'all very competitive because you are sports led? It makes sense, you know, medals and stuff. A family game night, is it better if y'all are on the same team or opposing teams? Megan won't play games, y'all. Megan won't play games. It's so frustrating. Really?

She won't play cards, she won't play anything. I'll play some cards, but I don't like to be competitive in life. It's not fair. No, but even on the field, the field I was like, so much. Girl, what? You have medals, they gave you a big ass shoe. I always figured the person who won four World Cups wasn't that competitive.

I mean, we were going to win. I like that. So there is seven Olympic medals, there's championships, there's a giant shoe, a medal of freedom. Where do you all put all these awards? Does your living room just look like a high school lobby? Like, where do y'all? We actually have none of it in the house. None of it. What?

It's all in storage or in a safe or something. So one year we decided, let's be smart about this and buy a safe. So we bought one of those small ones, whatever you put in a closet. And then we put it in there. But we never got to the part where you have to drill it into the wall so somebody could just

really come and take the safe. This sounds like the most insane episode of Storage Wars. I'm just thinking of all the people you two have beaten for championships and medals and honors, and they're like, they don't even care. I trained my whole life. They don't even care. The medal's locked away somewhere. I cried when I lost.

And they're just unsecured, safe, just floating around somewhere. I could have just waited and got a jackhammer. Basically. Yeah. Might as well be in a shoe box. Jeez. It was at one point. It was. Yeah.

Yeah, we up, this is the upgrade. Wow. Are you against just being ostentatious? Do you feel like it's too flashy? It's too gaudy? Like why don't you have these? A little bit, yeah. Really?

You heard! And like, you're not gonna wear them, they're heavy. If I won a giant shoe, I would be wearing that thing around my neck every single day. I would like your podcast to start with the sound of you just taking all your medals off. Clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk. It's the first 20 minutes of every week. It's actually her. Thank you.

Well, all right, Sue and Megan, we've asked you here today to play a game we're calling... Partners in literal crime. So you two are a famous power couple. So we decided to ask you about an infamous power couple, Bonnie and Clyde, who also have seven Olympic medals for big wives. I want to know where they keep theirs. In their coffins. Because they dead. Now, answer two of your questions right and you'll win a prize for one of our listeners,

the voice of anyone from our show on their voicemail. Bill, who are Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe playing for? Ren Hopman of Seattle, Washington. Hey! Alright, friends, here's your first question. Bonnie and Clyde committed crimes across the US in a stolen car before being gunned down by Texas Rangers. A surprising thing happened after their deaths. What? A the local baseball team decided to change their name from the Texas bank robbers to

the Texas Rangers. B, their life insurance policy was fully paid out because insurance companies did not yet have an exception for dying while committing a crime spree. Or C, the next year, the site of the shootout became the top location for weddings in all of Texas. I enjoy the whispering. Why are you looking at me? Megan thinks it's C.

Okay. Oh my God. Wow. I made it. And Ms. Suber, do you agree with your partner? Yeah, final answer. Do you agree? We're going to vote B, join together.

The answer is B, their life insurance policy was fully paid. You did it, Joe. Here's your next question. Bonnie and Clyde, you're going to vote B. That's your policy for Holly Page. You did it, go. Here's your next question. Bonnie and Clyde are two of the most famous criminals of all time, but Frank Hamer, the Texas Ranger who finally caught them, has his own claim to fame. What?

He's A, one of the earliest people on record to use the phrase bust a cap. B, he's the Frank that Frankfurters are named after. Or C, he hit number one on the charts with a song called I Shot Bonnie and Clyde. He's A. A. You know what, actually, yeah, it's A. After the shootout, Hamer said, quote, I hate to bust a cap on a woman, however, if it wouldn't have been her, it would have been us. And gangster rap was changed forever. What a thing to learn. us and gangsta rap was changed forever.

What a thing to learn. Alright, here is your last question. Bonnie and Clyde have a preferred getaway vehicle, the Ford V8 Model B. Apparently Clyde loved the car so much that he once did what? A. Got a tattoo of one on his arm next to the word Zoom. B, called the editor of the Dallas Morning News insisting the paper referred to them as Bonnie and Clyde and their Ford V8 model B. Or C, wrote Henry Ford a letter praising the car, quote, sustained speed and freedom from trouble.

Sue thinks day. I can read the answer. I think it's C. The answer is C. But sadly for Ford, everyone knows that today the best getaway car is the Nissan Ultima. Bill, how did Sue and Megan do on our quiz? Proving they are always winners. They got the pose, come on medals.

We would send you a trophy, but what would be the point? Going to a storage unit in Silver Lake anyway. Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe are legends in their respect for sports. New episodes of their podcast, A Touch more, drop every Wednesday wherever you get your podcast. So Sue Bird and Megan Rapinoe. Thank you so much for joining us on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. In just a minute, we reveal the underground wedding scene in our listener limerick challenge. Call 1-888-WAITWAIT to join us on the air. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from MPHorror!

It's a high stakes election year, so it's not enough to just follow along. You need to understand what's happening so you are fully informed come November. Every weekday on the NPR Politics Podcast, our political reporters break down important stories and backstories from the campaign trail so you understand why it matters to you. Listen to the NPR Politics podcast wherever you get your podcasts. This election season, you can expect to hear a lot of news, some of it meaningful, much of it not.

Give the Up First podcast 15 minutes, sometimes little less, and we'll help you sort it out what's going on around the world and at home. Three stories, 15 minutes, up first every day. Listen every morning wherever you get your podcasts. Wait, wait, don't tell me. Fresh air, up first, NPR News Now, Planet Money, Ted Radio Hour, ThruLine, the NPR Politics Podcast, Code Switch, Embedded, Books We Love, Wildcard,

are just some of the podcasts you can enjoy sponsor free with NPR+. Get all sorts of perks across more than 20 podcasts with the bundle option. Learn more at plus dot NPR dot org. This is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We are playing this week with Helen Hong, Adam Burke, and Alonzo Bowden. And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Illinois. Filling in for Peter Segel, it's Dulce Sloan.

Hey! Thanks, Bill! In just a minute, Bill has dinner with Buster Rhymes and our listener, Lemrick Challenge. If you'd like to play, call us at 1-888-924-8924. But right now, panel, some more questions from the week's news. Adam? Yep.

Now, you're familiar with Tech-Neck, right? Nope. Okay. You're not up on the latest terms. So tech neck, the quasi-modo look you get after staring at your phone all the time, right? Well, this week we read about a new way to get rid of it. What is it?

Throw your phone into the river. Okay, what about a way to cover it up? Oh, cover up tech, is it like where like, where one of those travel pillows all the time? You might say not all heroes. Oh, is it, oh, they're special like tech neck capes? Yes, they are telling people to wear a cape. Cover up your tech neck. If you weren't getting beat up enough.

We're all crumbled over our phones 100 hours a day, giving our neck that fresh off of our roller coaster accident look. And it's called tech neck. Or as your mother used to call it but now you can look like Supergirl doing it or like yeah the crappiest superhero it's Instagram stalker man I don't understand I don't understand how the cape covers up the hunchback doesn't it just doesn't it make you just look like you have a hunchback with a cape on it? No, that's what the pleats are for, Helen, the pleats.

Well, we also have the increasing intensity of these storms. Now, God forbid you're wearing your cape. When a category four blows in, you are gone. What happened to, oh, that cape was tied a little too tight. Last seen floating over Indiana. I don't know. So when your cape gets caught in a revolving door and you get strangled to death, they'll be like, well, at least he doesn't have tech neck. He has no neck. But he's fine now. Helen?

Yes? Companies are trying a new way to capture buyers' attention in the store. It's packaging their products how? Packaging their products? I think I need a hint. You thought you were getting M&Ms, but surprise, it's paperclip. Packaging their products in just the completely wrong packaging? That is right! What?

In a trend called chaos packaging. Companies are putting perfume and cleaner spray bottles, gin and motor oil containers, and for when you accidentally drink motor oil thinking it's gin, just look for your first aid kit in a nearby soup can. What? Like companies are doing this for the same consumers that are eating Tide Pods in the correct packaging. Isn't this called fraud? I would think so, but also, and this is true, there's an ice cream tub of tampons.

Oh, man. It's either brilliant marketing or Ben and Jerry's worst flavor ever. This is definitely somebody at the factory quiet quitting. Like quiet quitting really hard and then just being like, you know, just put more Dora El on. I don't know. Now, does this work both ways? Can I take a can of peas to Nordstrom and say, I'm returning these designer shoes. I'd like my money back.

Ooh, that's good. Or I can take my ex and return him to his mom and be like, hey, you lied to me. On the outside, he was a good man, but on the inside, he's trash. I brought her a seat here, ma'am. Take him back. I brought a receipt here, ma'am, take them back. Come on.

Coming up, it's light and fill in the blank. But first, it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-wait, wait, that's 1-888-924-8924. You can catch us most weeks, including next week for a fun Halloween show, right here at the beautiful Studer Baker Theater in Chicago! We'll be back at the Fox Theater in Detroit on the 14th of November. You can also join us in New York City at Carnegie Hall in December.

For tickets and info, go to mprpresents.org. Also check out this week's How to Do Everything. Ian and Mike help you optimize your Halloween candy and talk to the fawns himself about how to be a cool. Hi! You're on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me! How is everybody? My name is John Blankenship.

And where you from? My family and I live in Franklin, Tennessee, just a few minutes south of Nashville. I have been through Franklin, Tennessee. It is very nice. And what do you do for a living? I work at a small marketing, digital marketing agency that one of my best friends started a couple years ago. I don't know what that job does.

Welcome to the show, Todd. I don't know what the job does half the time either. It's okay. We're in the same boat. All right. Bill Carter's going to read you three news related limericks with the last word or phrase missing from each. If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly on two limericks, you're a winner,

baby. Now, here is your first limerick. On a rail car, don't dress like a schlub, hey, and don't stand in the cheap catered grub's way. Champagne corks will pop as they're calling out stops, cause our wedding is held on the subway. That's right! Good one. In nasty news, there's a growing trend where people are holding weddings and receptions

on the subway. It's perfect if you're only guests or break dancers, a mariachi band, and a tall person coughing directly onto a short person's head. Is this in New York City? Yes, and according to New York Times, the end train is the most sought after wedding venue this year and the wedding DJ is some guy watching YouTube without headphones. I wouldn't mind going on a morning commute and suddenly being like, yeah, I'll have some cake, sure, yeah.

Pass me some champagne. So when the train stops, just random jump on the train and like, hey, look, we're at a wedding. Yeah, you can't hold up the, it's Babylon every time you get on a train car anyway. All right, here is your next limerick. My love for green foods began rockily, but I know that they're good for me.

Luckily, and that sulfurous smell helps my body feel well. Now I'll really start eating more broccoli. Hey! Broccoli! Jonathan! The New York Times clearly had some extra time this week because after a thorough investigation, they're reporting that broccoli is healthy.

What? I mean, of course it is. Look at it. It's a tiny tree. So, did they have like a guest editor this week that was just every mother from the 1970s? Or some type of farm-to-table con job where somebody's like, if you got this broccoli, you got to push, call my brother at the New York Times. Yeah, big cauliflower, couldn't afford it.

Because it was too busy being pizza. All right, Jonathan, here's your last limerick. This resort meal is scenic and cool, but I got my eggs wet like a fool. There's chlorine in my drink. Dropped my fork. Now it sinks. Still, I love breakfast served in the pool. The fun new way for rich people to be ridiculous is to eat breakfast in the pool. The Washington Post reports that this is popular with influencers and other people trying to

convince you to eat wet toast. Also were the Washington Post and the New York Times having a competition for the dumbest article? Definitely a slow week on the news. Phil, how did John do? John is a perfect player. Thank you, John. Hey!

Thank you, John, for listening. Thank you so much. It was great to be on with you all. Thank you. Thank you, man. Have a good one, John. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. If you enjoy Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, you should try out NPR+. With Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me+, you get sponsor-free listening and exclusive bonus episodes from just this show. But you can upgrade to the NPR Plus bundle and access perks from over 20 of NPR's most popular podcasts and more. Give a little, get a lot in return. This message comes from the podcast Pod Save America. It is here to help with all of the election analysis. Co-hosted by former Obama aides, the show is having honest conversations about the state of this race and they want you to join. Subscribe on your favorite podcast platform now. This message comes from SiriusXM. Hosted by Joel Kim Booster, Bad Dates dives into downright iconic

bad date stories. Whether you're laughing, cringing, or even tearing up, you'll definitely feel a bit better about your own dating disasters. Listen to Bad Dates wherever you get podcasts. Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many Fill in the Blank questions as they can. Each correct answer is worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

Hannah and Helen each have three. Alonzo has two. All right, Alonzo, you're in third place, so you're up first. Fill in the blank. During her CNN town hall on Wednesday, Kamala Harris said she believes that Donald Trump is a wood. Wow. We're just going to leave that open like that. I think it was fascist. Yes. This week states reported that over 28 million people had blanked early. Voted. Yes. This week the U.S. announced that ceasefire talks with blank would resume. Israel. Yes. On Tuesday the International Monetary Fund said that

global blank rates have continued to fall. Interest. Inflation rates. Oops. Is that the same thing? Last week the BBC apologized after their weather app forecasted blank in London. Pennies from heaven. 13,000 mile per hour wind. That was my next guess. Absolutely. On Thursday, the New York Liberty was honored with a ticker tape parade after winning the blank championship.

WNBA. Aye! This week it was revealed that the big secret behind a German restaurant's best selling pizza was that it came with the side of... Pizza from Italy. I know this one. Do you know this one?

I know this one. Cocaine! So police said that anyone who ordered a number 30, you know, they thought it was weird. It would come with like breadsticks to drink and like a bag of cocaine. And weirdly enough, the same thing happened at that Chuck E. Cheese where the animatronic band was really into EDM. Phil, how did Alonzo do? Four right, eight more points, total of ten puts him in the lead. Okay Adam, you're up next. Phil in the blank. After an E. coli outbreak linked to the restaurant, blank said its food is safe to eat. McDonald's. Right. On Thursday, the DA in Los Angeles announced plans to re-sentence the blank brothers. The Menendez. Right.

This week the White House confirmed that North Korea was sending soldiers to aid blanks war against Ukraine. Russia. Right. On Tuesday it was ruled that Rudy Giuliani must turn over his Manhattan apartment to the blank workers he defamed. Election workers. Right. Weeks after it was discovered that many zoo pandas were

just dogs in disguise, a shark at an aquarium in China was found to be a blank. A panda in disguise. A robot. On Tuesday, LeBron James made history by playing in an NBA game with his blank. Song. Right. On Wednesday, a Polish radio station announced it had replaced all its journalists with blank. AI? Right. This week, it was revealed that a team of hackers successfully overrode robot vacuums

around the country and forced them to blank. Rise up against their human oppressors. Ah, forced them to chase their human oppressors' pets around the house. The company that makes the vacuum said not only were the hackers able to remotely control the vacuums to chase pets around, but they were also able to talk through the built-in speakers, which raises the question, why does a vacuum need speakers? No one's ever been like man I love my vacuum I just wish it was louder. If my room is chasing my cat can I call in sick in New York? Yes. Bill how did Adam do? He got six rights, 12 more points and The total is 15 and the lead Okay

So bill how many does Helen need to win six to tie seven to win? How are you ready for the game ready? Okay ready. Okay, sis. On Wednesday, striking airplane mechanics again rejected a contract offer from blank Boeing. Right. On Monday, aid workers warned of dire conditions for refugees trapped in blank Gaza. Right. On Friday, President Biden formally apologized for the government's role in boarding schools that stripped blank of their culture and language. Native Americans. Right.

For the first time, Vice President Kamala Harris said she supported raising the blank to $15 an hour. Federal minimum wage. Right. This week, footage revealed a sheriff in Georgia had called in three deputies for backup when he blanked. Clogged a toilet. When he got the wrong order at Burger King. This week investigators confirmed

that a newly opened fire station in Germany burned down because the fire department forgot blank. Pay the water bill. They forgot fire alarms. Because they were eating pizza with cocaine on it. Now the firefighters could have saved it. The problem is they're taught to go down the pole. No one's ever taught them how to go back up. Bill, did Helen do well enough to win? All right, eight more points, totaled of 11,

means Adam Burke is the winner this week. Congratulations, Adam. You are this week's champion. Now, coming up, our panelists predict after the three-minute long hug, what will be the next surprising rule at the airport? But first, let me tell you that Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with urgent hair care productions, Doug Berman, Benevolent Overlord. Philip Godica

writes our limericks, our public address announcer is Paul Friedman, Our tour manager is Shayna Donald. Thanks to the staff and crew at the Studup Baker Theatre. BJ Liederman composed our theme. Our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dornbach, and Laleen King. Special thanks to Blythe Robertson and Vinnyam Basuna and Monica Hickey. This week Peter Gwynn goes by Dulce Gwynn. Emma Choi is our Vive curator. Technical director is by Lorna White, our CFO is Colin Miller, our production manager is Robert Newhouse, our senior producer is Ian Chalogue, and the executive producer of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is Mike Danforth. Now, panel, what will be the next rule at the airport. Alonzo Bowden. Don't you know who I am, people? They're not allowed to board the airplane because they don't know who they are.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Helen Hogg. If you get randomly selected for a pat-down inspection, the TSA officer first has to have a staring contest

with you for three minutes. And Adam Burke. If your plane is a Boeing, your boarding pass will have a handy last will and testament printed on the back. Well, if any of that happens, we're going to ask you about it on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Thank you, Bill Curtis. Thank you Bill Curtis. Thanks also to Adam Burke, Helen Hong, and Alonzo Bowden.

And thanks to all of you for listening. I'm Dulce Sloan and we'll see you next week. This is NPR. Who's claiming power at this election? This is NPR! Who's claiming power this election? What's happening in battleground states? And why do we still have the electoral college? All this month, the Throughline Podcast is asking big questions about our democracy and

going back in time to answer them. Listen now to the Throughline podcast from NPR. Hey there, it's Tamara Keith. I cover the White House. I know this is hard to believe, but one day the election will be over. Then the winner gets a lot more powerful. It's my job to report on what they do with that power. That's public accountability, but it's not possible without public support. So please support our work. Sign up for NPR+. Go to plus.npr.org.

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