Walking The Dog with Emily Dean - Emma Doran (Part One)

Episode Date: March 3, 2026

This week Emily and Ray take a stroll with the brilliant Irish comedian Emma Doran.Emma is a huge dog lover with two of her own, Twiggy and Stan, back home in Ireland, and naturally the chat quickly turns to canine life. Ray, meanwhile, seemed quietly delighted to have Emma’s undivided attention.Emma talks to Emily about her fascinating life story, from growing up in Ireland to discovering she was pregnant with her daughter while still at school, and how becoming a young mum ultimately gave her the confidence to take the leap into stand-up comedy. A very good decision, as Emma has gone on to become one of Ireland’s most prolific and successful comics, with multiple sold-out tours, millions of online views, and a memorable appearance on the Amazon series Last One Laughing Ireland.Her live show Emmaculate is touring across Ireland and the UK this year. Tickets and dates are available at https://emmadorancomedy.com. Emily also highly recommends Emma’s debut memoir Mad Isn’t It?, a funny and deeply honest read.It’s a warm, hilarious and big-hearted walk with someone who radiates good energy and loyalty, particularly when it comes to defending Ray’s honour.Follow Emily:Instagram X Walking The Dog is produced by Will NicholsMusic: Rich JarmanArtwork: Alice LudlamPhotography: Karla Gowlett Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I thought they were selling the hair to pay for the houses or something. Because they got married and the hair was gone. Mushroom doos. All these women so young, 24, 25. With mushroom dues. This week on Walking the Dog, Ray and I took a stroll with the brilliant comedian Emma Doran. Emma is a big dog fan. She has two dogs herself, Twiggy and Stan.

They were back in Ireland at home living their best life. But naturally, I couldn't wait to hear all about them. And Ray, I won't like, was totally thrilled to have her all to himself. Emma is one of Ireland's most beloved stand-up. She's had multiple sold-out tours, millions of online views, along with a scene-stealing appearance on the hugely popular Amazon series, Last One Laughing Island. She's also had a really fascinating life, and we talked about all of it from her childhood growing up in Ireland

to discovering she was pregnant with her daughter while still at school, and how navigating motherhood at such a young age. age, kind of ultimately gave her the confidence to eventually take the leap into stand-up, and thank God she did, because this woman is genuinely hilarious. And if you want to see her live Emma's show, Emaculate, is touring all over Ireland and across the UK this year, and you can get your tickets at emma Dorancom.com. I also really, by the way, recommend Emma's debut memoir, Mad, isn't it? It's just so incredibly honest and funny, a little bit like her, so well worth a read. Ray and I absolutely loved Emma. You often get a feeling about someone from the very first

moment you meet them on these walks. And the feeling I got with Emma was just pure warmth and good energy. She also got very outraged when a man in a cafe sneakily gave Ray a little kick out of the way. He didn't think we saw him, but we did. I mean, I wasn't thrilled about it. Emma went full on gladiator, I will have my vengeance in this life or the next. And Anyone who has raised back like that is officially a friend for life. So I'm afraid she's now stuck with us whether she likes it or not. We might even move in. I really hope you enjoy our walk.

Here's Emma and Ray, Ray. Well, I think you really seem to warm to Ray from the moment you mentioned, didn't you? Do you know what? I was, well, the word isn't the right word. I was told. But I was told, wait, you see Ray. And I was like, yeah, yeah, I have little dogs. You know what I mean?

I'm glad. I think it's the face I think it's the little face Look at Emma He's just so cute Isn't he though I think he's because he's kind of ridiculous Ray, where's Emma

There she is Sit down Sit down Do you like he's got a little parting His hair's a bit like Anna Wintel Yes He's lovely What did he look like

When he was a little pup I'll show you a picture of him He looked ridiculous He looked like a sort of Sesame Street embryo. Did he? You know, he's sort of, it didn't even look like a creature on Sesame Street or the Muppets. He looked like the remainder of a ball of fluff they would use to make it.

I can only imagine. Does he bark? No, he's a robot. He's never barked. No. See, that's great. Is it? Yeah.

Because I remember my dog didn't bark. And we're like, oh, she doesn't bark. And then I remember she barked for the first time. We're like, The trouble is it makes you very intolerant of barkers and someone will have a totally normal dog and I'll go, what on here? Oh it's terrible, no, because my, about my dogs are barkers and it is bad like as someone else came into the house, you basically tell you how all your time you just go into the dog constantly

shut the fuck up, shut the fuck, what are you bargaining? Wait, shut up, shut up. It's bad. Well, I'm glad you raised the subject of your dogs because I happen to know, yes, you have dogs And you have, have you still got, is it Twiggy your dog? Twiggy and Stan. So Twiggy is the man and Stan is her son. And we're going to get onto that.

But I have a feeling if I'm not wrong, because I've read your absolutely brilliant book, which we're going to talk about. I can't believe that. Really? Yeah, I'm like, that's biggest flattery to me when someone says I've actually read the book. I'm like, wow, okay, I'll sleep with you.

I'm like, wow. You know what to me that you talk? the time because people say oh watch the clip around and I'm on yeah good for you I watch crap on my phone all day as well but you don't know it though if someone actually reads your book you're like wow imagine if I start talking about it and it's so obvious I'm lying yeah I know yeah when you lived in the South Africa what about page 89 what did you think about that no even if you had it in your hand that's fine by me so you your dog Twiggy yes had babies I call them babies yeah

the same time that you had your second child yes so we see my dog twiggy is my first dog so i all the pets that i'd had growing up were pets that we had happened upon so if we had happened upon a dog we would have had a dog you know but we just we never found a dog we only found cats and we found a rabbit actually once but anyway so they were our pets and then and this is in Dublin where you grew up yeah and so then the dog base the story was there so my fella Shane he really wanted a dog I wanted a dog his whole life and this was a real thing you want it and I was like you know like just I don't know because you're kind of like oh I'm gonna be the one looking after the dog so what he did was he got me

pissed and we like saw an ad online that night and the next thing I know we're in a car park of a shopping center collecting this dog of somebody I said, oh my God, what have we done? Anyway, we fell in love with Twiggy straight away, but we probably weren't as on the ball about getting her neutered. Because with cats, you have to get that done straight away, or as soon as you can, because most cats are out jumping walls and climbing trees. But she was in our house.

So this Jack Russell was hanging around our house. And we were like, oh no, and it'll be fine, it'll be fine. A local near do well. Yes, he was hanging around. He was one of these dogs that just kind of roamed around. They're nice little dog. Yes, I like those dogs. They're sort of a bit...

I'm not sure if I... They're like their dog equivalent of fat boys in a way. Oh yeah, totally. And this is not a joke. He used to hang around outside the bookies. That's where his little spot was. I used to where he was. I love this dog.

Oh, yeah. But like really nice little dog. Not like Berkey or whatever. So he used to come and kind of visit the house because he could obviously smell what was going on and we were like, oh, that dog because once they're in heat you can't bring them to the vet then. You've got to wait

until they're out of it and catch them again. So my daughter was about, yeah, she must have been 10 at the time, she opened the door to go out and play she came back and she said, she knocked on the door and she was like, the dogs are stuck together. I was like, oh God, so we went out and it was where we were on a cul-de-sack at the time

the dogs were stuck together and obviously so the Jack Russell Jack we called them was stuck to her from behind obviously but she's kind of bigger than him so kind of but there was a little mountain we go God fair play to him for getting up there and then you're like that's my dog and eh I'm not joking gorgeous day everyone was out in the road to all the kids all the like people just start coming people when two dogs are riding I swear I'm when two dogs are riding people it's like a the homing mechanism within them. They start coming out of their houses and they're like,

I don't know when I'm coming outside, but I sense there's something to say. They all watched. Yeah. And then I didn't realize, I don't know if you know this, after the deed is done, they stay stuck together for ages. Really? Yeah. Not very like some men then.

No. No, no. He's not charging his rape and getting out of there. No. He's stuck to her for ages and he turned around the opposite. way and he's facing this way she's facing the other way so I was like that's done and my fella's dad was over at the time he's from Athlophone I couldn't you know country man and he just went oh there'll be pups now and I was like I was like once he said it I was like he must be

right so I was pregnant at the time yeah and she got pregnant with pups and twiggy had it was it five still and I I collapsed she had the pups in the kitchen I collapsed. What an experience though, Emma? Was it beautiful at getting to experience or was it just nattering? No, you know, it actually is, but I had only just had a baby like three weeks before. So it was all a bit raw for me. I started kind of like, you know, when I could see she was having a contraction,

I kind of start breathing with her. And I was so ridiculous. I was so sweet, though. It was too fresh. But they come, the only thing is, like, you don't know what the story is when they're born, because when they are born they're just in the little sack. So you're just kind of like, I was, all the time I was like, oh, I think, no, that one doesn't look well. I've got one looks so similar, but it's short hair.

Oh, say hello, Raymond. Raymond. Hey, hello, baby. Say hello, Raymond. Oh, thank you. Have you got a Shih Tzu as well? Oh, too, aren't they the best dogs? Yeah.

My friend has a Jack Russell Cross. Oh, yeah. You do, don't you? Yes, yes. I'm trying to bring her over now to the Shih Tzu side. Yeah, I totally would. Do you get it? Yeah, oh, totally.

They're very cute, aren't they? Not a very good one of them, but there's my two. Oh, Bonnie and Clyde. Oh, Bonnie and Clyde. There you go, Ray. She's got the same choice. Look, Ray. Very expressive.

They're funny little things. They're quite sort of stubborn, oddly. Have you noticed that? They know their own minds, don't they? But he doesn't bark. Do yours bark? Occasionally, yeah. But not big barkers?

No, not. No, no. No. Oh. I don't think Shih Tzu's bark that much, don't they? That's a big selling point. Yeah. It's a big selling point.

Yeah. Lovely to meet you. Nice to see you. Bye-bye. I like that about dogs. You sort of chat to people in a nice way, but not so much that it becomes, when will I ever leave? Yes. Do you know what I mean?

I know. It's not funny to see a man like that. Talk to a dog baby. That's what I love. Hello baby. Because he was a man from an old. an older generation and that's me saying that so you can imagine how old he was but he looked like you know he's got his very posh range over his obviously quite wealthy old generation

and the fact that he just melted he ended his coffee he was on a car yeah he's on a car he's so I don't want to say hello baby I was like he said hello baby I thought I know this girl's hot but really isn't that so funny I thought he was saying that to you at first That even was, he was on the ground, right? That means you've got Twiggy. Twiggy, yes. 13? She's 13.

Then we have Stam. And she's a Jack Russell cross. She's like a, yeah, she's kind of a Yorkshire Terrier, Jack Russell Cross, I think. Because actually, see, when we got her, the people that we got her from said she was a Shih Tzu. A Shorky! A Shih Tzu Crossed with a Yorkshire. I love the way you shouted that. Serious, what I remember.

A shorky. A shorky. They said she was a shorky. Is that a Shih Tzu Yorky? Yes. Oh, I love that one. So the family joke is they said she was a shorky. Turns out she was just a shit dog.

She's definitely not. I think she's a Yorkshire with a jack whistle. And Stan is her son. And do you notice, because I've often wondered about that, Emma. Is there, do you, can you notice a mother and something? Or dogs don't really have that, do they? She will do a little bit like she will definitely lick him and like clean his ears and stuff Oh that's a dog and he is very like so she's we've always kind of called her a slug like she's always been old even when she was a pup

Like lazy I would like now I'm not walking here if she if she knew oh this is the big long walk I don't want to do this Whereas he has always been very much like a pup yes so he's like he'll always be like me hold that oh yeah because he'll always be like you could walk him for like miles and miles and you could like you could run a marathon with him where she's like now so he i feel like he's always stayed quite pup like yes and nobody like if you saw him like he's very young looking where she is like she kind of looks like that like you know like a shaggy movie dog got it you know that's her kind of vibe um but we'll have to go to Dublin we want to meet these dogs so we So we kept Stan and then my mom and dad took one of the pups as well.

So that was the dog that my dad didn't know that he wanted, who was now his baby. Right. So it's the way, I bet he's... Yeah. And now he's in love with his dogs. So they call their dog, Juno. And he calls Juno his baby and he says he's convinced that she talks because she does make a kind of a noise.

very strange, but he feeds it non-stop. Oh, this is the thing they started to. They took a pup. I'm like, just had a, I've a newborn. I'm like, so does anybody want to pop, take a pup? They're like, we actually fancy a dog, right? So they brought the dog, they had the dog for a few months. They brought the dog to the vet.

They're, you know, get a checkup, all this. And the vet was like, okay, so the dog's now brutally obese. What are you feeding the dog? Turned out, they were feeding the dog sausages. as a treat. That's a bit 70s. Yes.

I don't even eat those anymore. No, when I heard this, I was like, oh my God, this explains my childhood so much. So what my mom was doing was she was boiling sausages, cutting off, and just like giving them the dog as a treat. Oh. That's no treat, Marjorie. Now, the dogs are obese. So they stopped doing that, but my dad adores the dog, still gives her bits of scound and stuff like that. But they got their stairs done.

done. See now, you know the kids move out, they're starting like bits in the house. They got one of those wood stairs, thing you my Bob's done. Dog won't go up the stairs. So she sits at the end of their stairs, calling from my dad. But she's, she's strange dog, I have to say. Ray's a bit like that. He's quite fussy about.

Does he go upstairs? Yeah, well I've got stairs, sheepskin stairs, that got up to my bed. Because the bed is too high. So I have sheepskin stairs to the bed. I did have stairs to the sofa as well. Yes. But you know you've got to maintain some interior standards. I know.

Well we had to get a little mast the other day for the couch because Twiggy getting up on the couch. Oh it's a big to do. And she does this thing where we call her like a sea urgent because when you try and pick her up, she starts like flailing. It's just either of them. Oh it's driving. You're mad. So we got a little mat for her. Not helping. She's trying to jump over the mat. It's like, just get up. She can do it. She can actually do it. So I want to go back. You mentioned your parents there. Yes. And I want to go back to your origin story, really, because you grew up. And I love the sound of your parents, by the way. I love the way you talk about them in your book. And so this was, this was in Dublin, wasn't it? Yeah, yeah.

And it was you, your two brothers, two older brothers, yeah. Sean and Simon? Sean and Simon. Well, one of them was actually Stephen, but he didn't want his name in the book. Yeah, yeah. I was like, fine, fine. But you're two older brothers. Yes.

And your mom and your dad, and I feel like your mom was it that she was sort of focusing on raising you guys. And then when she got older, she went back to work, didn't she? Yeah, she went back to work when I think was my mom. about like 10, like part time. Yeah. And was she working with adults with learning disabilities? Yeah. So she had trained as a nurse.

I love the sound of it. I love people that choose to do jobs like that. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, well I used to go, the place she used to work in, it doesn't exist anymore actually. And I used to go up to her constantly because I forget my key or, you know, something like this. And it was this big, huge center.

And I used to get such, I used to hear people like wailing and stuff, and I'm like, oh my God, what's going on? And she's like, don't mind him, he's grand. She's like, it's the quiet ones you have to watch out for it. I'm like, okay. Oh, really. But like very, it's real physical job, you know. But, yeah.

And your dad? Yes. Did he work sort of, he worked at one stage for RCE, the Irish television station. So his thing was, he was very, well, I've only, I mean, he's a, when he's television. me but it seems it seems like it's true he was very academic yeah and then all his his family were like well you have to do medicine so he did that and dropped out because he was like I know it's just this I hate his real thing was law he wanted to do law so he did his law which you know the way if you're um is it the same here if you if you

if you want to become a virus you have to devil for a year it's the same system isn't yeah you have to do well there's all sorts of things aren't there there's kind of conversion you can get law conversion courses and then there's pupillage and stuff so that's probably the same thing isn't he did the law degree but then he wouldn't have like been able to do the Devlin for a year and not have any money he was like you all right need to work so he did um when I go to say you he did employee relations he wants to walk with you he doesn't like me anymore is the choices do you like Emma oh because she's glamour she's glamour little bit shallow is he's shallow is he telling you. Your dad, yeah, he sounds an interesting figure in that. It sounds sort of super bright.

Yes, yeah. And sort of, so you were surrounded by books and culture, were you? Yeah, I think so. I think, yeah, like he'd be a big reader. And then my mom is quite, she's actually quite artistic. Yeah. You know, and she, not when I was young, but she paints now. but she always would have been like a very kind of crafty, make you do kind of ma'am. So if you wanted to make something or do something or you had an idea for something, she'd be there to be like,

yes, let's do that, and I've got the perfect piece of string or, you know, that kind of thing. So I don't know how they found each other, to be honest. Like they're very different to two of them. But yeah, kind of funny at a house, like everyone just kind of slagging each other. And my dad's quite chaotic person. Yeah.

You know, like, oh, just every, very, oh, he's very eventful. And sometimes I kind of look at him, I think, would he have better, would he be better being better being a drinker? You know what I mean? Like, would that have just calmed him down? Do you know what I mean? Because he doesn't really drink. And when he drinks, he's very smiley and mellow.

And I'm like, maybe this would have been good for him. But he's very chaotic. You were saying that, so it was sort of industrial relations that he did for, you know, which is the Irish that's kind of the Irish equivalent of the oh yeah that's like our national broadcast so yeah yeah and and so was that the sort of work he did like yeah so he was he was work is that like an HR thing that he was doing there yeah kind of or like kind of the way I don't know if it's the same with the BBC but the way it would be an or T is that like or release would have been back in day is like a lot of the people who

worked there would have been like in trade unions and stuff got it so he there always would have been something going on with the trade unions yeah or tea and this got it so but I think he yeah he really wanted to just I think he actually just really wanted to do law so he did leave there when I was about 48 and went to work on his own as a kind of a consultant because I think he actually he didn't like working for people but I It's when I look at it now I think yeah he was kind of probably somebody that should have been just out on his own But you know yeah couldn't like afford to do it or whatever and then I think when his when his mom died

He got you know like some I had this old house or whatever and he was like I think I'll go and do law now You know what I mean like my family's ground have this little chunk of money you know just even that psychological thing yeah of a half have that there. So then he went off and deviled and I thought, isn't that great like that he's he's not putting a time frame or a time limit on things you want to do. So now he's like in a 70s and he's a barrister. Wow. And of course my mom's like, slow down. Yeah, it's handy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's great. It's like one of those in the family. I'm always telling for people that not want to know. Sometimes I show him contracts and I say, what do you think of this? He goes, it's up to you. That's kind of the usual advice.

Oh, thanks, Dad. Yeah, he's like, you know what it is? And I'm like, what's that noise? I don't like it. I got the sense that there was, I don't know, quite a lovely atmosphere in your house. I don't know why I got that sense, but was it sort of noisy and friendly and... I think noisy and friendly and Kay, okay, I would definitely say my mom and dad very, um, Yeah, very like devoted to their kids or my dad would still like call us all like the babies and I'm the youngest and I'm like 41.

You know, he'd say to my mom and sometimes I'd hear him if I'd be able to her having a cup of tears or something. Did you hear from any of the babies today? She'd be like, well Emma's here at me now. Oh, that's sweet. You know, they're quite, um. Well, did they have strict rules though? Ah, yeah. Oh my God.

Strict, strict, strict, very strict. I am, yeah, my mom, me and my mom laugh about it now, like, but I just spent the whole of my teens lying and she did say to me she's like, you were the, you were the hardest one in terms of if we told you that you couldn't do something, you'd never take the no, you'd come back, nearly like a PowerPoint presentation of why you should be allowed to do this. why it was a good idea, why whatever. But I just spent a lot of my teens lying to them. I was, you know, I'd be, because I'd be crafting these elaborate tales of,

I was going to Anya's house to watch a movie and like, Arnie wouldn't, didn't even exist, you know what I mean? And just like constantly going bowling and Quasar all the time, i.e. drinking in a field. So there was a lot of, I really, I think I was maybe had one older brother who was a bit of a dry site like I we were worried about him for a while like is he ever going to leave the house what is wrong in him does he no desire to do anything you see the Bruno there's always got to be a we don't talk about Bruno I was we don't talk about Bruno

in my house were you and then you see we're only slagging the day because his wife his wife is Canadian and when he said when he said he's bringing this girlfriend home and her name's Kristen Alexander we were like oh laddie-da-ha doesn't something I dynasty. Yeah, yeah. She's not at all. Look at this one. I know. Should we? Like a mini husky, isn't it? Ray, I think this is going to be a lovely friend for you. Ray Ray, Ray, do you like this one? Is this a chihuahua? Yes. We were just saying it looks like a sort of mini husky. The colouring is quite unusual. Yeah. What's your dog called? Barbie. Barbie. Well, I have to say,

She's two and a half years old. Oh. Has she found her Ken yet? What's that? Has she found a Ken? Not yet. Oh, okay. Well, Ray could be the...

Ray, you are going to the bathroom. You were doing a poo on the first date. This is why you're single. This is why you're single. Bye, Barbie. I do apologise. How embarrassing. Yeah, so you were saying...

I love you. I love you saying that you used to lie when you were younger because I used to lie. Oh, nonstop. Nonstop. I love a child liar. Oh, I was prolific. Didn't you lie and tell everyone at school you had a boyfriend or you'd got with someone?

Yeah, I mean, I did a few of those lies. I mean, I did a lot of lying to my parents. And I'd know guilt about that lying to my parents or any shame. That was because I could see why I was doing it. I wanted to go out and have a good time and drink and smoke and get my haul and whatever. And yes, I do. What does that? You mentioned that.

your hole sorry is what is get your hole means like to get with to get with somebody so get your hole could be sex but does it mean the whole yeah it means the hole but it we don't distinguish between which hole oh see we don't say which hole could be your mouth hell or another hole but then you get your hot your hole is gotten oh really and so you say that in Ireland yeah I said you might say your friend how was last night and say did you get your hole last night we wouldn't say yeah it did it would you you go we lost you last night where did you go get your horse and you say

ride ride ride ride ride ride is a ride that a ride is no ride is right is not ride is say a ride just said a rag just did a gesture which i'm going to describe this course just a little yeah i forget that you don't say ride here no but i love this because i can't change the words now do you know that kind of way i love these expressions even though i know i know shag but it wouldn't it doesn't I know exactly what it means but it doesn't come doesn't roll off my lungs for whatever reason I wouldn't I wouldn't say I'm shag well it's gonna it's gonna roll off your tongue if you're gonna get you a whole yeah yeah yeah exactly exactly I know that's the thing it those you can't change that

language when you're talking about that stuff because it's it's gutral isn't us you know what I mean so yeah yeah were you considered rebellious then oh I didn't think I didn't think I was. It's only now like years later when you be saying to friends or you know like comedy friends or whatever they're just like you did what you did this but that's the way all my friends were a lot of my friends though when I when I look at it now there was a couple of friends who they were like there was big age gaps between them and the next sibling so they were kind of surprise babies so sometimes those parents kind of take the finger off the pulse you know

like if there's if you're four older siblings and there's a like a seven year age gap. They're kind of like, we're done. Yeah, maybe it was just the people that I hung around with. Yeah, and I'm like, I mean, it's bad to say, when I look back and got like, oh yeah, her parents were alcoholics, actually, I just didn't realize at the time. And her dad was having an affair as well.

You know, so I think it was just look. I taught my parents were so strict that they wanted to know where I was at what time. I was like, leave you alone. But I was just, but then at the same time, I never actually liked to fight with my parents. Right. I didn't, or sometimes I'd say to myself,

if I was really annoyed with them, I'd try and tell myself, now remember Emma, remember to be annoyed at them tomorrow. Right. To keep this, keep this, like, silent treatment, punishment. I'm sure they were only delighted, but to keep this punishment going. And then until the next day, I'd wake up,

and I'd be like, hi, I was like, I forgot. I was meant to be annoyed at them. So I never was really, I never, stayed annoyed with them for too long but yeah we were always great mates but she's like I just know all of this was going on and I'm sorry so you talk to your mom about like that kind of stuff I don't think so I suppose it depends and it's more modern that isn't it to talk to your mom about that kind of stuff yes because I think my mom was one of those people my mom was quite people considered her you

know cool mom that you had my mom was cool mom yeah come over to mine smoke silk cart and I'll play music and you can stay up late and your friends can even smoke dope. But interestingly, I found that meant, it was difficult when she felt, okay, that entitles me a little bit to access to your life, like your romantic life. And it was like, no, I don't actually want to tell you about that.

You're still my mum. I don't want to tell you about personal stuff and boyfriend. So I think it's complicated, isn't it? You know, I probably would have quite like one of your, like maybe someone who's a bit stricter, like, Yes. You know, a traditional family setup where... Look at that big boy. I know, I was looking at him.

What's nice? It's cute, isn't he? What kind of dog is he? Oh, Kane Corso. They're very good guard dogs, aren't they? Lovely Cain Corso, aren't you sweet? What's he called? Clash.

Clash. Clash. Good Clash. You're so cute. Have a beautiful day. Oh, I liked Clash. Yeah, I like Clash's owner, actually. Did she?

Did you like his energy? Yeah. Do you think? Yeah, I do like Clash's owner. You got a bit of a crush? Yeah. Can we sell Shane? Of course, he wouldn't mind.

Oh, I love Shane for that. Of course he wouldn't mind. Even actually, because we have a thing when we're watching telly or whatever, I'll be like, your girl's on telly, you know, like the different people. Who's Shane got a crush on? Oh, who hasn't he? But you know, it's a different every. You're the way every week you have a different.

person I'll tell you or whatever. You're holding it. Sorry. Sorry. So, I'm wondering, Emma, this whole thing about, you know, which people often ask comics, is when did you first realise you were funny? Oh, yeah.

And I really get the sense with you, from what I know of you, that there was a part of you that was almost embarrassed to admit that you had an instinct to want to perform. Yes. Totally. Mortified.

Really, why was that? It just felt very, you know, attention-seekier. Like, oh gosh, do you know? Get a grip. I just feel like a normal person would be happy enough to have a nice night out with their friends and kind of tell them a funny story and make them laugh and leave with that.

Do you know what I mean? But then to try and like, oh, it's just not normal. It's not a normal thing to do. Sure it's not. Well, you have an expression which you use a lot, which is scarlet. Oh, yeah, Scarlet, yeah, I'm a Scarlet. Is that an Irish thing where you're... I think so, or like there would be definitely a thing of... And what a Scarlet means, so if you say, oh, she wants to be a performer, a scholar?

Yeah, Scarlet, like, embarrassed, like you're embarrassed for her. So we would have a thing as well where we'd say, oh, somebody has notions. Right. So if you... So what would you want to do that for? Do you think you're going to be like a star or something? But that's interesting notions, because that's sort of a bit, that's kind of a bit like, yeah, the who do you think you are thing is, don't stick your head above the parapet, know your place of it. Yeah. Why do you think that was that prevailing cultural thinking, you know, amongst you and your peers say?

Yeah, I think it's probably, I suppose, it's probably a spillover from, you know, a Catholic Ireland. So say like my parents would have grown up in a very Catholic Ireland where you know you had the government but the church was in charge. Yeah. You know, so like I think and it was always like it would have been very much like doing things to keep in lied and whatever. So if your parents come from that, it's going to have a knock on effect with. I think it's just like a societal thing like it's not that long ago like it's only

only in recent years that like if you like say in Ireland right the primary schools so that's like from the age of 5 to 12 only like I say 90 something percent for them are Catholic so not everyone obviously going to them is Catholic

because that would be ridiculous but like up until relatively reasonably people were like oh I'll get my child baptized to get them into the school Now I know that happens everywhere. Yeah. But like when it's 90, over 90% of the schools, you know, like, oh God, that's still very dominant or whatever.

But yeah, it's probably just a... I'd say it's just a spillover of a Catholic kind of gilded thing. And that must have been quite difficult in a way, because you obviously, I don't think that's something you can learn. I think you've got unnaturally. I could see that the minute I met you... Oh. I'm like, oh.

No, if I take that as a huge cover. But I'm like, oh, so much. But you know what, it's a bit scarlet. Yeah. That's why you're reacting like that. You still, I think maybe you're someone who still slightly struggles to take a compliment. Oh, totally. Like if somebody says to me, your jacket's lovely, I have to, I have now tried to try myself to go, thanks so much.

When I gave me the life story of the jacket. You did it earlier with the others. Did I? I told you. Said they're done. And me saying done is basically saying cheap. Cheap as chips. Don't work.

Like, don't work. I've had a lot of therapy. I noticed these things. Shows. I'm a nightmare. But I noticed that. I said, I love your trousers. Because they're amazing leopard print trousers.

And I would just say, thanks. Oh God, they're from Don there. But that's interesting. You have me so straight away. What you definitely have. And you can tell that as soon as you meet someone. I don't really think you can learn that. It's not to do with being a performer.

You've got warmth and charisma. Oh, that's nice. Well done for taking that. I took her. And let it sit there. Yeah. It's nice. I'm tempted to say something now.

I'm thinking, oh God, she took that. Scarlet for it. It's a vicious cycle, isn't it? But, have you done lots of therapy? Yes. Ten years. Never done it. You don't say.

Oops. Oops. And I tell, The thing is, Gathing. Why tell other people? do it or when people tell me they're doing it I'm like that's amazing it's really great for you that's brilliant more people should do it not me well it's funny because you sometimes some people will say oh I don't need therapy I have friends and I say when you can't put them that in your friends

sure you can't well that's a right thing I feel like my response which I don't always say because I've had therapy but my response what I want to say is yeah I like I like to keep my friends that's what I have therapy. Yeah, that's a good point. But the point is, you have this warmth and charisma that's innate. I think it's kind of obvious, and that's usually there from childhood. It's not something you can sort of learn or acquire. So I wonder, you must have been aware that there was something about you that people warm to.

Oh, like a currency kind of thing. Yeah. But did you sort of, so that must have been quite difficult that you're thinking, well, I know I've got something a little bit different, but I can't really do anything with it because it'd be too mortifying to say, I want to be a comic or an actor. Do you know what I find, and I'm kind of realising it now a bit, is, so I'm not really the person to go into a group.

Right. You know, I won't be that person, or like to say, especially like a new group. I won't go into a new group of people and put myself as like I'm the in front person. My kind of mode is I'll usually hang back with somebody else and kind of start elbowing them and say, what's you make of all this?

So usually when I'm making somebody laugh or try to make somebody laugh, I've noticed a lot of the time it happens on a one-on-one thing. Yeah. So, but I really enjoyed how that would make people feel or I just, I mean, I even just adore the sound of laughter.

But if the way I was doing, I think, in my own life was quite like a personal, intimate thing You know, like a while, I know, yeah, a little bit class clown. In the sense of I would do a little bit of that. But I wasn't like down the back eating tipbacks, like, you know, a joke for any cost kind of thing. Yes, I know what you mean? You weren't a desperate clown. No, it was more a connection thing.

Yeah. So even when people would say to me, oh, you're so funny. But I'm like, yeah, but if you're going to be funny, you need a funny person with you. I can't make somebody who's not funny laugh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can, you know, like, so I think it's the, it's the connection of it that actually gives me the little buzz, you know?

And so, because all the people I'm close to, that's the connection I have with them when I think of it. All the stories are all the things. It's all, it's all funny stories. It's all those times where we were like bent over. or like, you know, somebody nearly got sick because they were laughing so much. Well, you're right, and when you're with certain people,

and this actually starts in childhood, even if you go into comedy or performing, you know, in any way, I think it starts in childhood. Is that person that, it's like being in a great double act, it's that person, that friend you remember where you think I'm 50% funnier with them? Oh, yeah, look, I was gig in Garway on Friday night. this girl came up to me after the gig and I was friends at her when I was a child so she was in a

child minders from like say till the age of like 11 12 in my estate so I spent loads of time with her and she came up to me after the gig and it was so sweet because she was like oh me and my mom have been watching you for years and she's like it all makes total sense they're like there's Emma that's like we're not surprised by any of it and she's like when you're up on stage there she's like when I heard you you're a little laugh she's like oh that's Emma's laugh and when I was talking about everything she's like oh it all makes total sense and I thought this is so gorgeous and so like I was like that I love what I meet someone from like when I was a kid who said Emma this is this isn't a shock to any

of us or whatever right so go back home I was telling Shane about this and he says oh the usual old shy people say I was the sign Fuck you. Fuck you. Let me have my moment, shame. One of the very. Some other people do say, we always knew she was going to do this,

that or the other. But then I find it interesting, yeah, because a lot of famous people, or people have gone on to work in this industry in a front-facing way. We'll say, every autobiography, which is what I loved at yours, didn't, your memoir, they always knew I was different.

I always knew I was going to be famous. And you think, well, you know what, if you'd have gone into the city, I always knew I was going to work in finance. Yeah, yeah. I think what they're mistaking when they, whenever I see that, I always think every child thinks they're special and different.

Totally. That's just being a child because your children are narcissists. No offense, I love children. But you know what I mean? You don't say they have to survive. They have to be narcissistic. They have to survive, exactly. They have to.

And so when people say, I just knew I was special and different, I wasn't in an office. Because I meet somebody, maybe not every day, depends on the day, but I meet somebody, I would say at least once a week.

where I go, they've got something or their gas or, you know, like, just something. Like, I was in my local shop there today, right? Is this in Dublin? This in Dublin, right? And there was a man, God love him, he was having some sort of episode, right? Some sort of breakdown. And it was all very loud, okay? So obviously people are looking, but trying not to look at the security happen,

but it's kind of all kicking off. And then this little old woman turns to me, a total deadpan, and she goes, I think there's something wrong with him. And it was just the timing of the way she said it was really like, no shit Sherlock. There was something wrong with him. When I was like, if she wanted to be a stare, she totally could have. She's like, you know, about four foot tall. You can see sparks and people all over the place.

It's just some people, well, you've got to be willing to. The opportunities or don't want to do it. Yeah. You know, I know plenty of people that could have done stuff, they're like, ah, I like, I like my life. I like to relax. And I'm like, yeah, that sounds nice, you know. I want to get onto a bit later in your childhood, because obviously, again, this is something you document in your book. And, but it was a huge event for you, obviously, because you found out you were pregnant when you were, were you 17 when you found out or 18. I think I was just, just 18, but like I was still in school. And it was kind of a holiday. Romance. Oh yeah totally yeah I would think I had basically been gotten to have like a bit of freedom and just like get away and then my friend had like a mobile home a caravan in a Wexford and I was like yeah let's go there let's get jobs like ridiculous as somebody said to me after it's like why didn't you go to Ibita and I was like we just didn't the aspirations were so limited we're like yeah let's go to Wexford

So I went to Wexford. We were having a great time and I got pregnant and then I didn't know but I came home and was starting my final year of school. And it's called it Leaving Certificate in Ireland, which is that our A-Levels, I suppose. Yeah. So the leave-a-ser, you have picked subjects along the way. You know, you've chosen your languages or whether you're going to do science. That's like, that's kind of like A-levels, I guess. But everyone is doing about six or seven subjects and then there's a point system.

Yeah. Look at that dog. He's chasing after the pigeons. See, Ray, that's what normal dogs do. What type of terrier is that now? I always forget. It's beautiful dog. That man's too far away to ask. Yeah. Is it? It's not an Airdale, is it? It might be an Airdale. Adam K. Do you know Adam K, he's got an Airdale? And I think it might be one of those. Beautiful dogs. Yeah, very nice. So go on. Oh yeah, so I, um, it's your last year of school and it's like a point system. And you were, was it sort of not like a convent, but was it a convent? Oh yeah, well it wasn't a common but like our principal, just put this in here, sorry.

The principal was a sister. Yeah, uh, mercy nuns. So she's a non the principal and then there's a few nuns knocking around. But I suppose originally it probably would have been non-nuns. She was looking around. Well, but there was, because she lived, the principal one lived in the building, in the school. Right. And she actually had a boxer dog, would you believe. Did she?

Yes. Called Bruno, if I'm not mistaken. Who she used to be going around school with. I remember one time my friend, so I got by my friend, her mom was the secretary in the school at one point and she had to go up and collect something for her mom. And we saw her in the non-known clothes. non clothes i was like oh my god like wearing a t-shirt oh i don't like that yeah i can't bear the nun in the t-shirt yeah yeah it was very because she had the whole the fall habit and everything

so yeah i came back to school and then i found out very quickly i was pregnant and it really was like that was that at the time that was the worst thing that could happen to you like it really like that was you mean specifically in ireland as well oh i think I think so and I think that again is a spillover of a Catholic ardor but that was like we would talk about it like saying you know in other way you'd be having chats yeah at break time or whatever and you'd be like what would you do what would you do if we got pregnant now and half the girls but I fucking kill myself yeah and either half of oh I'm I've run off to England or whatever that was kind of what you would say to each other you know what I mean and when they said run off to England on I mean we should say as well that abortion wasn't an option Yeah, wasn't legal.

It's pretty recent that. Yeah. So it's only like, I can't remember what year the referendum was. I feel like it was. So we had the marriage equality referendum and then we had the abortion one. But it was in very recent years. Yeah, very recent. Back then that wasn't an option.

The only option was to have. And you see, if you're a teenager as well, or you don't have the mains to travel or whatever, it's not a real. And you see as well, like you wouldn't have known. This is like before like you know everyone had internet their phones or you wouldn't have known even how to go about unless you had you know your best friend's cousin living in Liverpoolers you know what I mean like you wouldn't have really known how to access any information about it to make that choice and you you weren't you contacted the boy concerned who yes was young

and sort of didn't really know how to handle it let's be honest Yeah, totally, totally. And what did he say? Well, I remember he said, I'm not telling my mom yet. He was like, yeah, so I was like, I'll tell him. Or I'll tell him. I think maybe I just kind of had gotten an idea from like TV or film or something. And like, oh, you have to tell the dad.

You know, dad has to be the first to know or he has to know as soon as. And he said to me, which I've actually heard. And he's a kid as well, really. Oh, yeah. No, hang on, same age as me. Let's just. Well, let's just fucking get that down. Thanks very much.

No, yeah, yeah, no, totally, totally. You're absolutely right. He's good as well. Oh, 100%. So I ring him to tell him, and he said to me, it's a thing that I heard actually, what's the same? Chris Rock say in his standard is how you know.

And I was like, when I saw it, it was like, oh my God, can't believe Chris Rock got to do before me. I mean, anyway, he says, because you tell somebody they're pregnant. And if he says back to you, what are you going to do? You know, it's over. Because it's like, what are you going to do? You know what I mean?

It's not us. What are we going to do? So he was like, what are you going to do? So yeah, but he found it really hard to tell his mom. I think his mom only knew maybe like, I'd mean a week before or something. You know, so he was keeping that for months. Absolutely months.

But yeah, and I think, I can't remember when I told my ma'am, but I think I was fairly early on. You, well, I think, was, did you write your mama a letter? Yes. Yeah, I wrote her a letter because I don't think, I really actually couldn't say it out loud. I couldn't say I'm pregnant. I just, and I even, you see, this is how suppressed the hell thing is.

I was like, oh my God, I'm going to have to, not only am I'm telling my mom that I'm pregnant, whilst I'm telling my mom that I've had sex. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, she's going to be thinking, where the, where the fuck she was she doing this now? Who she hasn't said? She wasn't at the laser centre playing quite as an hospital.

No, she can't even bow. You know, I've been going back, another strike. Another strike. No, she can't. So, and that's tough because also, bear in mind, you're still going into school at this point wearing a bloody school uniform. Yeah, wearing the uniforms. Were you conscious about that point, about hiding it? Oh, massively. So I mean...

Tell me about the letter first, because I found that really moving. Oh, yeah. You know, it's funny, I couldn't... If I was to look at that letter now, I think I would probably cry. Yeah. You know, even still now, I would. I understand. I left her, yeah, so I wrote her a letter. And the letter was, I think,

I think it was about a page, maybe two pages. And a lot of the letter was kind of like, oh, it was a little bit like in Coronation Street when Sarah Lou gets pregnant. And she goes, I only did it one time. And Gail Flathai, it only takes one time, Sarah Lou. I was all this. I only did it one time.

And I says, it was all that. You know, because I'm still trying to convince her. I'm a good girl. This is a better teenage pregnant. than the other ones. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I, you know, I... But do you think as well that you were sort of...

It was so hard for you then as well, because you're not, you know, let's be honest, we now know, it's like your brain has not matured at that age. It's not until you're 25 that you're... So that must be very difficult as well because I think at that age, you find it very difficult to express sort of proper open vulnerability

and to say things like, I'm frightened. Yeah. Oh yeah I was very much a yeah I wouldn't have been able to say to anyone I'm scared I'm worried I need your help help me protect me I wouldn't be able to say any of those things I would be very much like just get kind of angry and like close the door kind of person but what I told my mom in the letter, you know, this is a magical letter, but she twigged straight away that I must have gone across the road to my friend's house

or she was like, I'll check there for it. And she just, she just gave me a big hug and she just said, oh, come home when you're ready or whatever. That makes me cry, but it was very... Yeah, no, but it was very emotional. It's like your worst fears and then... Yeah, and sometimes people don't have to say, much in those moments you know because if she'd started staying a home i set you off now

so what a lovely but then she told me years later tell you well well but it is very emotional hearing about that but she read it though she told only told me only told me like literally about a year ago but she read it collapsed to the ground hit the deck so when she came over to me she basically Just got herself. Yeah. Looking as good as she possibly could. She was protecting you from her feelings as well. You know.

And you see, obviously, what I didn't realize at the time either was, it was my first introduction to that my mom was also a woman. That had navigated the world herself as well and had friends who had had crisis pregnancies. You know what I mean? You was looking at all of the grand. grey stuff. So all the men in life, of course, lovely men, but they're very black and white a lot of the time. Whereas the women know, all the complications and the different things that that means for you as a woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's, I found the men in my life much more matter of fact about it.

And your brothers you actually got closer to. Yeah. Which was lovely that something that came out of that, that I got the sense that they were really showing up for you in a, in a protective. Totally. I never knew that they, I mean, I knew they loved me in some sort of like, you have to love your sister kind of a way, but I wouldn't have known that they cared about me. Well, do you know what? They wouldn't have said it. No, because actually it's only at times. Some people don't say until someone's deathbed.

Totally, yeah. And it's only in times of crisis, and that wasn't a crisis. You've got your beautiful daughter. But at the time, I can see that would have felt like a difficult thing to navigate. You see, that's actually it. You find out all these people that love you and that you don't, because at that, at that age nothing's happened in your life hopefully like you've had a nice time that you've had to you've had to find out that how people in your family feel

about you or whatever but it was actually I think that I was actually amazing like even my extended family like my auntie and my uncle they I five cousins on that side and they're all over a year yeah and when they met my daughter so my auntie Ann used to like bring us to lots of the appointments and stuff and was really like helpful, you know, practical, like real proper like, you know, Irish auntie kind of. Yeah. Right, let's get this sorted. But then when my daughter was born and she came up to the house and just watching her and my uncle Tim be like giddy at the sight of my daughter.

Basically like what I was like when I saw right. Like, squealing it. You know what I mean? And it's so small. I was like, oh, of course they like babies. They had five. But I hadn't thought of them. with babies because they were like

they had grown up kids you know what I mean I kind of had forgotten I was like oh of course you had like babies you had the proverbial village yeah yeah oh totally yes yeah and I wonder I have this image as well of you and it kind of again just

your vulnerability going to school with this uniform and obviously just there's a really heartbreaking story you tell about you're trying to conceal the pregnancy and one of the sisters I think it might have been the principal and said oh we'll just put a track suit on and so you do wear this track suit and then she forgets this and berates you in front of

everyone yeah for wearing a track suit and what did you say you said I said to her oh well you came to see a few weeks a few weeks ago my mom and then I kind of had to like mumble in front of everyone I'm pregnant but I was really like that thing like of make you say it now I don't that known, she was just, oh, she was getting doddery, do I mean? She had just forgotten. But I like, this is the biggest thing to ever happen in my life. Do you not remember me?

I was just another girl in the schoolgirl. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know what I mean? And then there's another girl in that incident who, I've got to be honest, doesn't come out of this brilliantly, and she says afterwards, well, are you with him then? Yeah, yeah, yeah. She says to me, so you're with him or whatever. and I was like, oh, it's complicated. And then she's like, well, you're either with my ear now.

I, do you know what? I found her there on Instagram a while ago, so absolutely stay here. Do you know, I'm really living, let live, but there's a few people you keep in your back pocket, don't you? I really hope you love part one of this week's Walking the Dog. If you want to hear the second part of our chat, it'll be out on Thursday. So whatever you do, don't miss it. and remember to subscribe so you can join us on our walks every week.