Walking The Dog with Emily Dean - Glenn Moore (Part Two)

Episode Date: May 28, 2025

We’re in beautiful Regent’s Park with the brilliant comedian, writer and broadcaster Glenn Moore! Glenn tells us about what it was like working on LBC with Katie Hopkins and Nigel Farage, what happens when you make a mistake when you're reading the news and his approach to magic realism within his comedy. Glenn is known for his brilliantly titled tour shows - and his new show “Please Sir, Glenn I Have Some Moore?” is no exception. The show debuts in Edinburgh for the full month this August and tours the UK from Autumn 2025 to early 2026. For full dates and to purchase tickets - head to glennmoorecomedy.comThis episode was recorded in early May 2025 Follow @glennrogermoore on InstagramFollow Emily: Instagram - @emilyrebeccadeanX - @divine_miss_emWalking The Dog is produced by Faye LawrenceMusic: Rich Jarman Artwork: Alice LudlamPhotography: Karla Gowlett  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to Part 2 of Walking the Dog with fabulous comedian Glenn Moore. Do go back and listen to Part 1 if you haven't already and do go and catch Glenn's new show. Please, Sir, Glenn, I have some more. It's kicking off at the Edinburgh Festival in August and touring all over the UK from the autumn through to next year. Get your tickets now at glenmorecom. Really hope you enjoy part two. And if you can, do give us a like and a follow so you can catch us every week. Here's Glenn and Ray Ray.

So the news reading thing did start to take off for you. I was, well, when I realised I've made a mistake and I was like, well, I will never go into comedy then because I've absolutely blown it. I started to, I was like, I don't know where I can try to freelance as a newsreader because I'm not very experienced. I've only done it for a year and I'm like 22. So it's never, I don't know what to do. And I just, in a very sort of self-destructive way, was like, why don't I just go for Sky News? Just go for Sky News or something massive and just see what happens. Maybe they'll appreciate the goal of doing it.

And so I just sent a tape of my voice over to Sky News and they were like, yeah, come in for unpaid for a while. But like if you're any good, then you can do it. And so I used to do like, I'd be at Thames Water Monday to Friday doing admin. It's like a minimum wage of admin job. And then on the weekends I'd be at Sky News. And then once I was at Sky News for a while, I'd then like got in touch with global radio who have like LBC and Capital and Classic and stuff like that. And I think they were kind of looking for freelancers, but also I was able to change my voice for each of the stations. So I was the only person that they would have on.

Yeah, absolutely. So are you allowed to give me an idea of how that would work? Yeah. So LBC is like straight down the line of sort of like a 48 year old man has been killed in South Yorkshire. He was found on the streets of Barnsley in the early hours of this morning. That would be how you do that. If it's capital, it's more like Pally and it would be sort of like. It's not like, great news.

But it would be sort of like, it would be like really fast pace, really loud. 48-year-old man's been found dead in Barnsley. We're going to have more details for you in just a second, that sort of thing. And then Classic FM would be sort of like, and a rare coin has been found. And it would be like really whimsical. Do you know, this is the most fascinating thing. It's never even occurred to me that you would have to change your present, which is stupid of me because of course you would,

but that you would have to, as a news really, you have to change your presentation style. depending on, you know, as a newsreader, you're thinking of the demographic, basically, aren't you? And how they want their news to live on. You get on adverts as well. Sometimes if you listen to an on site, it's a more pally station, then if it was like a medical advert and it's like, is there blood and your poo, sort of that sort of thing?

Whereas if it's like classic FM, they're like, if within your fecal matter there's it, you know, like they really like, I don't know, water it down, I think, for like they don't want to give any old people heart attacks. That's going to cause you. even more problems, Glenn Moore. So, yeah, so I would spend all my weekends at Global. Also, by this point, I would, I kind of got the confidence back to try and start doing,

you know, any open night night. And then I managed to get an agent. And when you're doing the sort of news reading stints, because am I right? Was this something, was this like a bit you did for comedy purposes? Or is it true that you worked with Katie Hopkins? Yeah, I did. Because, again, because I was, by this point, I was on LBC a lot. Every Saturday.

I like, James O'Brien. listen to. He came on this podcast. I was never on the weekday daytime, because they had like permanent people. You weren't on the right side of history. Whereas on weekends, that's when they needed to fill it with freelancers. So weekends, we were my busiest time because that's when all the comedy clubs were on. So I would do like a gig in Cardiff jonglers or whatever to a bunch of stag and hendos. And then I would get like an overnight megabus, get into London at say half two in the morning and then get to LBC for like half three, just not sleep at all. And then just do like a nine hour shift at LBC.

And yeah, because it was the shift that no one else wanted to do, none of the permanent members of staff would do, I would do Nigel Farage one day and Katie Hopkins the next day. How was Nigel Farage? Did you have much interaction with him? Not a great deal. He would never really come into the office and he'd just be in the studio and the news readers were in a separate room. So my defence would always be like, well, I'm not with him. I'm not, you know. And Katie Hopkins was really friendly and nice to people. And I'm always keen to say that to people so that they realize that it's just a character, what she does, which is so much more egregious.

Because you don't even have a decency to be fully insane. You're making this up for profit. She didn't have those views at all. Her and her producer would look through the newspapers each day, and she'd be like, what should we do today? And her producer would be like, there's this story. I mean, I guess you could pin that on migrants.

And she'd be like, yeah, like, yeah, okay. All right, we'll do that. That's what it was like. That's what all the conversations were like. It was so made up and pre-written. It's sort of prejudice for hire. Farage really does believe himself and he believes it all. He would like, I get that like, so with the rise of Donald Trump in 2016,

so that's when I was in my sort of final year at LBC and the other radio stations, you could tell that very sort of far right people were aware that Trump was insane and stupid, but it was in their best interest that he got in. So they'd be sort of like, I know, but, you know, we're back in him anyway. But I remember Farage just putting his hand on the shoulder with one of the newsreaders, watching Trump on the TV screen above him and him just going, God, magnificent, isn't he? And it was like he was so like, he's absolutely taken him with him. I'd occasionally see him like in the stairwell.

I remember, yeah, being at the top of the stairs once and he was in front of me. And I remember thinking, I could kill him. I could kick him in the back. I just, I could kick him down this. I could kill Nigel Farage. And I wonder if I'll live to regret that. I think you'd be forgiven. Sorry.

It's an interesting thing with him, isn't it? Because I'm always fascinated that people see him as some sort of charismatic kind of figure, whereas I see him as that man at the Rotary Club. Do you know what I mean? I see him as just like... It's like with Trump. You go, what are you relating to?

Yeah. And I look at Nigel Pryor and I think, oh, I know that man. And he was the sort of man that would have driven a Daimler because it was British and I don't know. I think he's sort of won up from Arthur Daly or something. That's what I think is so interesting that... It's like a parody.

It's really weird, yeah. Anyway, he's a whole other podcast. But you... Oh, is he on next week? Can you imagine? I'm sure he'd have something to say, but I don't think he'd like Raymond. No? Well, he's not sort of...

He's not an Excel bully. He's not an Excel bully, and also he's not. He's an imperial shih Tzu, so he's an immigrant. Oh, yeah, of course, yeah. And leave means leave, Raymond. Even for dogs. He hasn't got the right paperwork. I think he's an immigrant and also...

Doesn't earn. Doesn't earn. Doesn't speak on that. Come over here taking our podcast jobs. Taking a podcast job off somebody else. Absolutely. It's interesting how the comedy wove itself into this because you were sort of doing these news reading shifts.

And obviously very good at it, which is why you kept being employed. I don't, if I was full-time, I don't know if Fader thought I was good. Because I was for freelance, right, I was passable. It was like, this person's good enough for the radio. And also, newsreading was easy because you just have a script in front of you and you just read from the script. You're not having to ask any questions or anything like that. It was purely the only bit of journalism I was good at, which was just reading out someone else's life. You know, when you make a mistake, you know, sometimes newsreaders, it doesn't happen that often.

But when they make a mistake, how do you deal with that? Because some people go, oh, I'm sorry. and then they get back to the script. Some people just ignore it and some people say, oh, take my teeth out or something. Yeah, it's, it kind of depends on the station. At LBC it was like, you're in deep trouble. Really?

Whereas it was just, you know, not like that. It's a much more serious news-based station. Yes. Whereas like I haven't been a newsreader since 2017. However, if on the absolute radio, on the Dave Barry Breitford show, if the newsreader Emma Jones is ever away, they just go, I mean, you are qualified, so you just want to do it.

And you go, okay, fine, I'll read the news. And I'm not, I'm not good at it. and I can't really do it anymore. But you've got the hours behind you to be able to do it. If I make a mistake on Absolute, but I know that they'll just make fun of me. And that's fine. And we'll make a joke of it.

As long as it's not a serious story that we're talking about, but I slipped up on, then it's fine and we can make fun of it. Whereas, like, I would make mistakes all the time. Especially when I was in Sheffield and I was really new. And I remember once reading a script where I hadn't read, because usually, like, your Anne-Fineley story is always like a really light-hard.

silly story or whatever. It usually involves Ray, that sort of thing. Right, yes, yeah, exactly. It's, uh, and, um, uh, my final story involved playing a clip and I hadn't looked, I hadn't listened to the clip. I hadn't looked up the name of the person and obviously you introduced clips by being sort of like, and the, uh, the event organizer is Emily Dean. She said this, whatever, that sort of thing. Um, and so just before I played this clip, it was sort of like, Anne Barnsley is attempting to break the world record for world's largest samba band. It's happening at the Oakwall Stadium on Saturday afternoon. We spoke to the event organizer Glenn Moore and then I played the

I just hadn't read the same name as me. And I was so confused that I read it out like that. And that's how the bulletin ended to like a quarter million me. I was suspended from Sky News for accidentally reading out the wrong name of the station. Because Sky News Radio basically has a bulletin that they send out. You can't listen to Sky News Radio on the radio. But when you get like a small local radio station that can't obviously afford to have like a newsreader employed overnight. But legally, because of offcom rules, they need to have the news.

on the hour every hour. What they do is they use Sky News Radio, who they know that they just press a button and on the hour, a news reader at Sky will read exactly two minutes to the second of just generic news that's happened in the UK and the world. And so that's what I would do at Sky News Radio. And you'd always end with just, that's the latest, I'm Glenmore, because it wasn't, you know, because obviously on LBC you sort of go, you know, that's the latest from LBC, I'm Glenmore, but obviously they can't say that because it's going out to hundreds of radio stations, hundreds of different radio stations. And I slipped over Benedict Cumberbatch. We've all done it here. I mispronounced it and I was like, oh my God, I'm running out of time

because it's two minutes to the second. And if you go a second over, it messes up every radio station syndication. It's like, it causes colossal tech. His name is a couple of seconds. Yeah. Yeah. And so I just really panicked and I went sort of like, from Global's Newsroom, I'm Glenmore. And obviously that's what you would say at Global Radio, which was like LBC and Capton and stuff like that. And so not only was this broadcast going out to some global stations. It was also going out to all the Bauer radio stations and all the ones that specifically aren't global and see global as their major rival. And I just, it was like if you're on ITV News saying this is the BBC. It was just absolutely saccabal offence sort of territory and I got suspended for a few weeks and that was a real low point.

How do you deal with being in trouble? Do you get frightened? I was so frightened. I remember I said it and I was just sat in this obviously soundproof studio like, what have I just done? And I looked out the window into the newsroom and where it had been broadcast and the whole newsroom were just so, staring back through at me because they'd obviously heard it. And I just walked down in complete silence and I was like, I'm the news editor at the time. She was so nice. She was like, it's fine, but you'll make mistakes.

It's okay. Like, it's okay. But you saw the look in their eyes. I think the boss might ring you later. And yeah, about three hours later I got this phone call and I was like, I could just not pick up, never go back to Sky and just pretend I never work. I'm a freelancer, I don't know, you know. And he rightfully gave me just the biggest telling off of had as an adult. and it was just terrified.

I was just in the street, just so, like, shaking, so, so, scared because I was so in trouble. And I was about to go on holiday. So I didn't have, I couldn't make it right. I was away for two weeks,

unable to sort of make it right. And then the day after I came back from holiday, I was going to be working at Sky News. The whole time I was on holiday in New York with a friend, I was just like, oh, just a few days to go until I have to go back and face the music and stuff like that.

I mean, it was fine when I got back, but it was, I was so, so scared. So scared. But you have to go through things like that. It's horrible. Yeah, I'm just bad at confront. I'm just, I just can't bear the idea of confronting someone. I don't know where that comes from. I'm just, I really can't, even at the lowest level, like, of the lowest level of confrontation, someone stands on your foot on an escalator and keeps doing it. I'd be sort of like, so sorry, my foot's in the way of your stamping. You insane bastard.

It's so fascinating. I could talk to you about this whole newsreading side of your career for so long because it's so interesting. but then I think that's partly because you could make anything interesting as well and funny but the comedy thing that never died did it and so what happened was you was sort of gigging when you could yeah I mean I'd move to London for it so it's like I have to and so I just I didn't know anyone in the comedy industry I sort of envied people who you know like if you went to say Cambridge and you're in Cambridge Footlights then everyone in the footlights is probably going to at least try to give a go of comedy afterwards and if you will move to London afterwards then you can all kind of not help each other, but you're at least aware seeing on, even on Facebook at the time,

this being like 2013, what your friend's your friend doing? What's that gig? What's that gig? I can't make a note about it? And also, do you think, going back to your point earlier about this, it feeling almost embarrassing to say, I want to be a comedian? I think maybe if you've been in the Cambridge Footlights, it feels like such a logical career progression and there's precedence set with that happening, that it doesn't feel, it has less of that sense of I want to be a model. Yes, it was It's like, oh, well, other people have done this before me. Why not me? So our good friend, Pianoveli,

he, someone he went to uni with, went to Eaton. And he said, Pierre was like, he was like, I understand the whole prime minister's always come from Eaton thing. I get that bit. I get the family connections thing there. But he was like, it makes no sense to me that you get incredible, like, sports people as well. You go, why would it going to Eaton help you become a spot?

There's no connection there. It's in every field. You can find someone who is world-class, every field that went to Eaton and he said, well, I don't understand that. And the guy who went to Eaton was like, it's because of they just have unconditional support. If there's a sports day, the entire school goes out and they have to watch sports. They have to cheer them on. If you're in plays, they have to watch the play. They have to cheer you on. If you're playing, obviously, it being an old boy school, if you're playing a woman in a play, that would normally get you,

in 2007 would have gotten you bullied as a 14 year old. No, no, no, no, everyone supports you. It's just constant, unwavering support. How interesting. And that, that, that, that gives you backing in confidence, you know. So those kids end up, and when we talk about privilege, there's privilege in all sorts of ways, if you go like that, but we're also talking about the privilege of, as you say, I can do anything. Those kids kind of leave thinking I can do anything. I feel this way about like Gracie Abrams, because I'm like, I'm aware that like, let's say Jack Quaid, Meg Ryan and Dennis Quaid's son is an actor and is a great actor in his own right. And I think even without his family's connections would have become a profession, maybe not to the same level of success and

fame, but would have gotten somewhere based on his abilities. But I understand that coming from an acting family would be able to get you maybe shoehorned into an audition and stuff like that. But in terms of songwriting, why would JJ Abrams, the director being your dad, help you become a good songwriter? But what it is is, well, she never had to do, she never had to worry about, oh, God, I've got to do this gig in a pub tonight to 30 people, she just had space and time. Well, also, if she got a phone call from Ricky Jervais's agent, she wasn't having to say,

sorry, I'm just at Thames Water. Can I call you back? Yeah, it was time to write. I was envious of people who were able to do, say, their debut Edinburgh shows a couple of years before me when they started the same time as me because they had that freedom and space to write a show. And I was like, as soon as I finish a gig, I've got to go to bed and then I go to work. When am I supposed to be writing? I don't know when that's supposed to happen.

So, yeah, I was just, so I didn't know what gigs to do. I didn't know anyone in comedy. And I was just turning up at any pub, open mic night I could. where you'd be on with just insane people, just insane people, where you go, I think everyone here's quite unwell actually. I don't think any of us should really be on stage. This isn't a comedy night, is it? And the audience is just the other 20 acts who are on. There's no, there's no audience there and it was just, and you'd be limited to just five minutes of stage time. And I was like, when I was living in Sheffield, it was actually, the gigs were easier

and better when it was, I was actually gigging professionally a bit in Sheffield, like doing actual sort of professional comedy nights in Sheffield before I left. And I remember doing it, like, opening for Chris Ramsey or whatever when I was like just before I left Sheffield and I was like and I probably got paid like 50 quid which was just I couldn't believe I was like holy shit I got paid to do comedy but to go from that being able to do like 20 minutes in a pub in Sheffield was great but then to move to London and it was like no no you can do maximum five minutes on stage unpaid you better be fucking grateful for it as well and you better be fucking fine and I was and I was doing that every night making no progression just getting them for same

insane people most night I mean some of them were great and some of them went on to do a profession and stuff, but there'd obviously be a lot of chaff and a lot of really crap stuff. And then eventually, there's a comedy competition called So You Think You're Funny, which so many great people have won in the past. And I got to be in the final just before I moved to London. And the woman who runs at Julia Chamberlain, she also used to book geeks for jonglers, the big comedy club chain. And so I got in touch of her being like, I have screwed up my life completely.

And you said to me at the final, she was like, if you need help, if you move to London, and just give me a ring and I'm sure we can sort something out. Yeah. And so she was like, I know an agent who saw you at So You Think Are Funny and liked you. So do you want her details? Yeah. And so she gave me her details and then I got an agent and suddenly I was being booked in for actual normal gigs and I had time to write and stuff like that. And your comedy career has just gone from strength to strengthen.

I adore your comedy, Glenn. I just, you always make me laugh. You always surprise me as well, which I hope is a compliment. No, surprise is a big thing for me. Yeah, it is. I want to trick people. Yeah, you do. And I love it.

And you've got a show coming up. Your new tour, it's got a brilliant... If you don't know about Glenmore, what you need to know is that his surname is very helpful to him for coming up with some of the best tour titles ever. So we've had more, more, more. No. Oh, no. I'll take you through them.

Take me through them. 2016 was Glenn Gary Glenn Glenn. 2017 was an outlier. That was the very best of Belinda Carlisle. She wasn't mentioned at any point during that. Oh. 2018 was Glenn, Glenn, Glenn. How do you like it?

How do you like it? Yeah, Glenn, Glenn, how do you like it? 2019 was Love Don't Live Here, Glennie more. I think that's currently my favourite. Great, okay, no, I'm happy with that. Then, a brief break for lockdown, 2022 was, will you still need me? Will he still feed me? Glenn, I'm 60 more.

Oh, I see, come on. And then that was my most recent show was 2022, so this is, please, Glenn, I have some more. You see, that's now my favorite. I'm running out. I think I would like to just have a, I'd maybe go a different tact for the next door are just not my name related. Or maybe I've changed my name by Deephole and I can get a fresh batch of names and a fresh batch of titles. That noise is suitcases, which is the vein of my

life for a podcaster. So long as I'm recording me to hear this. Also, where are they, filming an episode of The Apprentice? Where are they checking into in the middle of Regents Park? It's the one place I assume we wouldn't hear a suitcase. Do you think, you know, because a lot of your comedy, you discuss personal stuff in it a lot. You discuss things like relationships and dating sometimes, but a lot of it, it's a lot of comic license with that, isn't it? Because it's sort of, you go off into, a lot of it's, you know, fantastical, isn't it? Yeah, it's fully magic realism. Yeah. And I don't expect, what I'll do is I'll make one, I, I write, I've never really understood, and I'm fine with, like, it's great when comics can do it. I've never been able to do this

myself, but I know a lot of comics are like, I want to know what point I'm making first, and then once I've got my point, I'll then write the jokes around that point, but I want to make. And whereas I'm entirely like, I will write a collection of jokes first, and then from there figure out what it seems to be about, and then reverse engineer it from there. So the storyline comes second, because I know I'm going to be making up the story anyway. So I'm like, well, I may as well get the jokes first, and after I've got a few hundred, you go, oh, I guess I've got a few that could be about an enemy. So I'm like, I'm going to be a few. So I'm I could have a sort of, there's a nemesis in the show maybe.

So if you're telling, there's a very famous bit of stand-up you do, which I love and you're about being broken up with, for example, or, and you'll say something like the reveal is that you and your girlfriend are sleeping on bunk beds. Oh yes, yeah, yeah. So in that instance, do you come up with that concept of that idea that it would be funny to make that reveal that actually it turns out we're sleeping on bunk beds? Oh yeah, it's punchline first. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Sometimes you'll hear something and you'll go, that sounds like it would be a punchline. Because you say a brilliant thing about how you're able to make an escape like James Bond down a ladder off having sex. So you get like the initial punchline first and then you're like, I wonder what else I could say about the punchline. You can try and come up a couple of tags afterwards. But generally it would be like it's not like I sat down and wrote a routine about mum beds. I just realised that maybe after a couple of years I was like, I think I've got three jokes about bunk beds. So let's put those together and then that becomes a bit.

And when I say jokes, I really do mean just like one sentence. I don't really have jokes longer than a sentence. It's all very short, which newsreading help with. Like I remember the first day of my journalism course, our professor, Marie Kinsey, who was amazing and had like a brilliant sense of humor and weirdly recommended I quit journalism going to comedy. Maybe I was shit, I don't know, but she was like, I think you should give this a go.

And that was really supportive of her because it was not in her best interests to make me go away from journalism, you know. But on the first. stage, he basically gave us a lengthy three-page press release about a minor car crash or something like that and said, write a 100-word news story about this. Like, take all the major details from this, write 100-word new story. As soon as you did that, okay, now write a 50-word new story about it. Make it 20 words. Make it 10 words. Make it one headline. And so you had to whittle it down. And so that's what I, that exactly informed how I write. So everything I write,

I'll be like, how can I make that short? And in a sense, those are the principles of comedy in some ways, aren't there? Because actually what you have to do, comics are brilliant at that. they're succinct. So I will often ask comedian friends. I mean, when I was coming up with the title for my book, Frank Skinner was very helpful because I knew the idea I wanted to get across. But I'm more of a words person. And so I don't, I'm not, I don't have that muscle like he has of like, right. And he said to me about my book. There was so many complicated ideas. And I said, well, it's about a dog. And it's about a dog. And it's about a dog. He said, just tell me what happened quickly. Come on. And he was like doing that. And I said, everybody died. So I got a dog. And he said, oh, that's what you call it.

Great, yeah. I would never have come up with that myself because I would have thought I couldn't, I could never have got to that point where it was only, however many words. You as a comic, your mind probably gets there much quicker now, doesn't it?

I'm not sure. I just know I get, I used to get frustrated if I'd watch a comic be sort of like saw I was home the other day and my mom is, oh, my mom is crazy, but I love it a bit. And then they'd stop to tell me about something else and be like, why the fuck did you put that in there? There's no joke, like,

surely my mum is so crazy that she wants blank my mum is a sort of person who blank like that surely put a joke in it so I'd then start to go over my own stuff and be like where can I what can I if I've got a joke about hating someone I'm like why am I saying just one thing I hate about them why can't I just then if I've already

got the setup I've bought myself a setup if I hate this person so much when they blank and I've put one punchline I'm like the setup's already out the way so I can now do a second punchline without having to do the setup again and a third punchline without doing the setup again. So that's three jokes in one,

and it would all be about cramming in as much as possible. How many jokes could I fit in a show? So I'd always try and aim for, like, not jokes, but what I'd call it laugh lines, like a sentence that I hope would make the audience laugh, which possibly said on its own wouldn't make sense, but as a topper on a different bit would work. So I always aim for like 300-ish for an hour-long show.

So that's interesting. So you don't come at it from... You know how you look at someone like Jimmy Carr, and his is very much punchline-based and gagged? And then there are some comics where it is much more anecdotal, isn't it? Yes. And there are comic scenarios and possibly punchlines within that. Yes.

But they're very much more a funny thing happened on the way to the forum, whereas Jimmy, you get the sense he's much more of a technical about jokes. Absolutely. Short jokes, they're not connected in one joke. Like in one joke he's got kids. In the next joke, he is a fatherless paedophile. There's no contribution. It's not a father-in-a-fair.

Sorry, in the joke. Although if anyone would appreciate that, it would be Jimmy Carr and would find it funny and not get offended. I can absolutely guarantee he would enjoy that and not object to it at all. But there's no correlation between any of them. And that was something I struck, when I was first writing shows, I was like, I kind of wanted to try, well, what have you had an anecdotal show that was just one-liners? So, but just each joke progresses the storyline along, but it is in the framework of the story.

Because I realised when I did watch one-liner comics, you do get exhaustion after, like 20 minutes. Right. And it is just, if there's no, if the jokes aren't about anything, then it's all just happening in stasis, there's nothing happening. So I thought as well, even if someone hated my jokes, if I'm telling them a story, at least there's a, at least there's a story that they can listen to. And that makes it less grating than just random joke, random joke, random joke. Do you feel a little bit more uncomfortable, for example, your wife, Katie, yes. As a comedy writer, isn't she? Would you feel uncomfortable discussing your family or personal life for real,

up on, let's say you and Katie had an argument, all couples do. Would you, would you feel, I feel I'm crossing a boundary talking about that on stage and therefore? I'd ask her first, but also I don't, I gravitate towards it be it like, in my new show, I'm still working out, is, is, am I, like, married in this? Am I, am I in a relationship? Because it's not based on any reality or anything. like that necessarily. But I realised there are enough personal experiences that I've

come up with jokes for that it does make sense this time to talk quite plainly about my actual life I guess. But it's always like all names are changed. My last show was mostly about me living with my brother. That was like most of it. I don't have a brother. But that was like, I just had loads of jokes about a male housemate

and it just made sense that I moved in with my brother. I had loads of family jokes that just weren't about anything. And that doesn't present problems with sort of hardcore. What are your fans called? Glenites? Mores. does that not present problems in terms of or do you think people just buy into that conceit and understand it innately that oh well that's he's just being that on stage I hope they're buying to it I try and be ridiculous from the off so that they know so that

they can sort of tell but I'm interested why I wonder if that is sort of you feeling because an interesting decision and it's one I understand but it almost might suggest that that there's a bit of a boundary that's that you like there is so what I would usually do is make the most vulnerable bit of the show. I say vulnerable as if it's like a serious bit. It would be like purely joke led, but I would always make the most vulnerable thing, the one true thing in the show. So for instance, working with Katie Hopkins and Nigel Farage was the only true bit of the show I did in 2019. Do you say in the show, this is true, by the way? Yeah, I had proof. I played a clip because the audience listened to it fully expecting it to be

a silly punchline and then it was just both of our voices. Which kind of makes it from you in a way. Yeah, hopefully. I mean, I realised that actually. I actually, I actually, I mean, the audience. I in retrospect, it probably put the rest of a show in quite disappointing relief in that you realised that everything that had come before it was like, oh, so that was all bullshit then, okay. But usually, yeah, because I just try, I try not to make things even attempt to sound true, but sometimes something will happen and I'll be like, oh, that would be a fun story to tell on stage. And I'll tell it on stage and it will work absolutely fine. But in my head, I'm like, it's not weird enough for it to have been something I made up. And I'm just,

And if the audience are expecting, if the audience do believe it, I've made everything up, then actually that's not really a worthwhile story to tell, I think. And tell me what this new show is about then. It's about, it is about a real experience. A waiter insisted that I got my name wrong when I booked a table. That's all it's hinged on. That's all the show is hinged on. And then the entire show is based on that.

I'm in already. I'm so in. But I realized in that moment how easily I bow down to people and back down on any point. And I don't have any courage in my convictions and anything. And so that's just what the theme I realized. Everything I was writing was about. I was absolutely the opposite of an aggressor in every situation. I was writing jokes about and stuff like that. So it kind of stem from that, I think.

I love that. And it might change dramatically. It doesn't start in August. So we're talking in May. You can get tickets now, can you? It went on sale literally last week. Oh, brilliant. I'm definitely going to come to see. I love me a bit of Glenmore. This was my lockdown go-to.

Was it? Were people allowed to leave? Yeah, having tins in the park with friends, but always be Regents Park. So do you live quite near here? No, but this is on my way home. Ah, I see. So I find if ever I'm sort of running home or anything like that from the radio show. I do like that it takes me round London Zoo. So I do see giraffes every day, which I feel to live in a city in the UK is quite nice. It's quite nice to see giraffes.

So yeah, this is on my way home, but I live like an hour's walk away from here. And you've been doing the absolute radio show with Dave Berry for the breakfast show. Yes. How long have you been on that? Well, it started with Christian O'Connell, so I was hired for that. End of 2017. It was a really, do you know what? That was the most life-changing sort of 72 hours or so.

because up until then I'd been sort of like freelance newsreader doing really, really long hours and was doing comedy but not like full time, full time, full time and then there was a moment in September 2017 where I did my first episode of Mott the Week and then the next morning was the first day

absolute so like about eight hours later I mean straight after in a sort of news reading capacity no no it's a in the sort of co-presentary and reading a 20 second sports bulletin every hour um and so those were on the same 24 hour period and then straight after my first day on the breakfast on absolute I then had a I got hired as a writer on the mash report which was the Nish Kumar Rachel Paris TV show um so and that was not my first full-time like, that was my first proper like comedy writing gig as well. So that was, everything,

everything changed in the space of like 24 hours, which was really, really nice. But I remember as a result vividly that first day on the breakfast show of Christian O'Connell. It was really good fun. But he even announced he was leaving about two months later. That was it because he went to Australia. He's in Australia now in Melbourne, yeah. And so the Dave Barry breakfast show started in May in 2018. So it's been quite a while. Look at this little terrier. So cute. That's a really cute dog. So yeah, it's been seven years. Oh, look. The two. Terry is saying hello to Raymond, Glenn. It's a match made in heaven.

Raymond's just cocked his leg on him. I do apologise. And Dave Berry, he's been on this podcast. He's a lovely boy, isn't he? He's a lovely man. And I worked with him when I was at Capitol as well as a newsreader. He's so nice. If ever the breakfast newsreader was away, then I'd sort of step in.

And that was, yeah, my God, that must have been about a decade ago. And he was so nice then. It was him and Lisa Snowden on the Capitol show. Yeah. They were just really lovely and welcoming and he was really encouraging because I think I just thought as a newsreader for most of the other stations, you just read the news and and then you get out that he'd let me sort of be in the studio and make jokes and I think he sort of trusted me and it was a real delight when he then got announced as the breakfast show

and absolutely was like, oh great to work with him again. He's got, he's not got an ego, Dave. He just strikes me as, you know, he just really wants to get on with people and do a good job and he does. Yeah, I mean, Katie, my wife said he was the nicest celebrity she ever met when she was a teenager because she did work experience at MTV when she was about 14. Can I just say? Big old heron? Oh, well, that's the blue.

Is it? Is it? I'm really proud of you. Is it, though? Because are you sure I've got that right? Do you know, herons, they're very sinister, aren't they up close? Yeah, they're not my... They're not my least favourite of the river hanging out one. Pelicans are worse.

Look at the way they put the claw down. Yeah, if a bloat walk like that, you'd hate him. Actually, they're growing on me now. They're rather regal. arrogant I'd say who are you you live outdoors there's something of the Princess Margaret

about me do you know what I mean I beg your pardon hello Heron and they've got the sort of Cruella de Ville black streak in the hair yeah that's quite impressive

isn't it do you know up close they're pretty phenomenal can't look at them I am I was going to take a photo I noticed you got your camera out that was adorable yeah I mean I

I mean, I didn't. Why not? I don't know. I just, I, uh, it's my, I'm, uh, I thought when am I going to cherish that? Will it, will it be my home screen? Probably not. I like that you doubted yourself. I just knew it wouldn't make the home screen. Well, you know, my mother had a rule whenever people went on, it showed you their holiday pictures and my mother used to get so angry when people took pictures of views. She said, why would you bloody do that?

She went, you could just buy a postcard or look at all that in a book. She said, sent, they all, always have a rule. human being in a photo. Yeah, I always found it weird when it was like the selfie stick phenomenon and people would hold their selfie stick up high over the crowd and I'd be like, but you weren't there. That wasn't your view. So what are you like? It's not a memory now. Yeah, exactly. It's not a memory. So, um, but also I'm not in many photos that I take. I don't like, I don't like, I, do you know what's so weird as someone who's very, who's like, it's a necessity as part of the job to be like on screen. I just don't like being in photos

and I never take photos of myself again I think I see it as like an arrogant thing not when other people do it only when I do it I do struggle and that may be a generational thing with me you're obviously a lot younger than me but I do really struggle with the concept of posting a selfie online still which is just because of the work that would have had to have gone into it back in the day I think it's that thing we were saying

to get it developed I think it's the shame which is just the generational thing where I think I'm saying, I'm taking a picture of myself and I think this is worth putting on a public forum so that you can all look at it. I've sent this to you. I think it's basically like saying, look at me. It's not. It's totally normal. Everyone does it. Of course. The problem is mine. It's a me problem. But I cannot kind of get over that. I still feel a bit cringy when I have to post photos of myself. Yeah, I just, I think I'm worried that people would go, Sorry, did you think you looked nice here?

How dare you? And it's a shame because there are entire years of my life where no photographic evidence exists of me. Really? Yeah. Yeah, but the thing is, Glyn, maybe that's why you're so nice and people like you.

What just overwhelming self-flagellation? Yeah, maybe that's the way forward. I presume people, I mean, you have an early stop, but that is something, That must be the question you get asked most often. People always say, oh, what time do you get up? There was somebody who worked for a breakfast TV show who just had a T-shirt printed saying 505 a.

Right. Because they got asked it so often. Do you get asked that a lot? Yeah, I do. And I don't mind it so much. It's more just the horrified reaction when I tell them. And I'm like, well, you know it was going to be early. In the same way of it like, it's like if someone tries your glasses on.

And that's bad enough. when they go, fucking hell. And you go, what's that meant to, how's that meant to make me feel? What are you, by the way? Can I guess? Yeah. Minus six. Minus six?

No, what? Minus six? Do I look like a minus six? Minus three? I think it's like 2.5 or something. Okay. Maybe. Oh, no, it might be four.

I think I'm in the fours. Jonathan Ross's minus nine. Really? Imagine trying his glasses on what happens. Yeah. I think, but I have this. with yeah, I'll tell people what time I get up and they're always like, that's not so bad. I usually feel worse when someone says, oh, it was a nightmare to get up at 7 a.m.

Sorry, sorry. I know that's offensive to you. And I'm like, no, no, it's fine. I know I know that that's rubbish. Yeah. If someone told me on a weekend I had to get up at 7 a.m. Yeah, that's rubbish. I get it. It's all relative.

So I don't, yeah, I'm so, I'm so used to it now. And to be honest, when I used to work at Sky News, I had to get up at half two. So this is way better. Yeah, you just don't have a night. You don't have a sleep. It's just, it's pointless. It's pointless trying to go to about at 6pm. And I imagine the next day you just feel permanently like you've just flown to Perth.

Do you know what I mean? It's that sick feeling you get. Yeah. I had Louise Minchin who used to present BBC Breakfast on this podcast and she was saying it. She said, you know, even in something like BBC Breakfast, she said, I just felt jet lag the entire time I was doing it. I only realised when I left that that sort of permanently sick sort of coffee feeling. That is so perfect. summed up. Absolutely. I feel fine now on the breakfast show, but Fridays, Fridays are really

collapsed. I think my body can tell, or my mind can tell, there's something that can physically tell that it's a Friday and I'll really struggle. I think I, my worst performances I give on stage or on Friday nights because I'm just shattered by that point, I think. Or Fridays when I have like a big nap after the show, but I can't, a napping is disgusting to me. I wish I could do it. But no, I fall into a deepest sleep than I've ever gone into in my life. And it's like a medically problematically deep sleep. And I'll wake up feeling with just the driest mouth. And no amount of like showering afterwards can make me feel like clean.

No amount of teeth brushing will make me feel okay. It's real. I just can't do it. I know what you mean. I do feel a bit like a disgusting old Roaldale character. Like the nappers, the horrible old nappers. Also it used to feel embarrassing when I did. And if I dream, when I was, I'd sleep during the day and I'd have a dream and I felt that

was really embarrassing. If I'd had a nightmare during the day, I used to get really, I used to feel really embarrassed because I was so keenly aware that everyone else was at work and helping the world go around and the economy and then I was getting worried about a scarecline. Nigel Farron. Yeah, yeah. It was just so embarrassing to have had a nightmare. Hey, what do you think of that, what are those called? Pedalows. Yeah. What do you think of pedalo? They look, they actually look quite cool.

people on it. I don't think we would look so cool, Glenn. No offence to us. Yeah, they look really relaxed for what is. I mean it's gym equipment, isn't it? That is why they look good. Do you know, they look like if that was a catalogue for pedaloes, they are the couple I choose. Sorry, what they're selling them? You can purchase a, I feel like there's only one company that sells pedalo's anyway. I don't think they'd be like, oh, well like that one. Oh, was that the Sportage? What do you do? I've got the 2015, I've got the 2015 model of the pedal. Oh, good news. New Pedalo catalog just dropped.

Yeah, I know. The last one packed in, it felt it's MIT, so it's just good to, it's good to get another one, get back on the lake. They look, they've made it look. They're doing good work for pedilos, so this makes me want to go on a pedolo when I look at them. But I think the reality, I think you and I would, are warriors. We, we, we, what I'm experiencing right now is, I feel like I'm in London as a tourist. It's, it's really picturesque.

There's like blossom floating around. It's obviously a really hot day. This feels a bit manufactured. I don't trust how nice it looks. Come on, Ray. Ray gets a lot of attention when we walk, Glenn. How do you feel about attention? I really like it.

I really, really like it. Do you get recognised? And how does that feel when you get recognised? It has never, ever been a hassle at all. I've always really, really liked it. It's always really nice. And sometimes it makes me panic in that I suburb. think, oh, I forget that actually, those are just the people who've come over.

So, I sometimes forget that you can be perceived in public. And sometimes I'm like, oh, on the tube, was I just scratching my face in a really weird way? And did someone see that? And so it makes me panic that actually there might be people out there who potentially recognise it, but just didn't do anything about it. And, you know, I can't remember the last time I walked over to someone I recognised was just like, actually no it was quite recently but there have been plenty of time

I remember seeing Kit Harrington on the tubler in the absolute height of his Game of Thrones fame and it was rush hour I was in one seat he was directly opposite in the other seat and there were people like standing all around us and no one had noticed it was him and I saw him and just like locked eyes with him

and he gave me the slightest like shake of the head as if to be like don't say anything because it will just everyone in the tube will obviously go crazy but no it doesn't happen like it probably happens like I don't know, once a day?

A nice amount? I think that's the perfect amount. It's a really nice amount. I'm actually, I'm really happy with it. I hope it doesn't go down. And at the same time, it's, yeah, like I don't,

I'm trying to think, there's a couple of people I know who actually going from place to place is a bit difficult for them because they just, they're swammed. Well-known comics. Yeah.

And I don't imagine that must be... I know that. I feel, I hope you wouldn't mind me saying this, but I know, Rob Beckett, I know, and I feel for Rob sometimes. just because just when he's with his family. I'm just conscious that, you know, and not just him.

Like also, you know, we all know people where you think, oh, okay, this feels like, it'll be nice to turn it off sometimes. It's really nice. Sometimes occasionally I'd have had like a message on Instagram for someone being like, oh, I saw you earlier, but you were with your friends and I didn't want to come and bother you. And I'd have been like, I'd have loved that more than anything else in the world. For that to have happened in front of my friends, that would have been incredible. They'd really let you down.

Yeah. You have a family, don't you, Glenn? Did you get married, by the way? Yeah, I did, yeah. Oh, thanks. And do you have a little one? Yeah, I do. I thought you did.

I thought you did. I love Little Moore. You don't know him. I think I would... Don't give him your sympathies and... No, you don't know him. Maybe he's horrible. I think I'd like Little Moore.

Yeah, but Little Moore's got your jeans. Yeah, he's a very silly billy. Silly Billy is my favourite experience. expression. It's underused. A real silly and William. He's deeply unsurious. My sister used to use it and she used it brilliantly to explain to my niece once about when Mimi was asking about 9-11 and it was a difficult conversation. And she said, who did that though? And I just said it was some George Bush.

My sister went, it was some very silly billies. So she just going. So from now on. She thinks Al Qaeda are just the silliest boys in the neighborhood. Silly billies. That's, do you know what? It's funny you should mention 9-11 because I've realised that, yeah, at some, like,

when he is of an appropriate age for me to inform him of that atrocity, I've never told anyone about 9-11 before. I've never, have you ever told anyone about 9-11? Isn't that weird? Like, I'm kind of almost looking forward to when he's old enough, I can tell him about COVID. One of the most frustrating things about COVID was you couldn't tell anyone about it. You couldn't go, the craziest thing happened to me.

earlier. Yeah. Because it happened to everyone. Well, it's trying to work out what they know, like with my niece. I know, because my sister, sadly, isn't around anymore, but her, I should say, she hasn't abandoned the family. She died, sadly. I want to make that clear.

But so I'm often educating me and me about things in the past, and I always check. I said, do you know about this? Did you ever find out about this? Yeah. And sometimes she gets really offended. And I'll say, like, do you know the Jackson's life? She goes, for fuck sake, what kind of an idiot do you think I am? But then something I'll assume.

that she'll know about. I can use things she's never heard of. So, I mean, Thay, my producer, really won't mind me saying this. But we were, Faye used to work on the radio show. We did at Absolute. Yeah.

Frank Skinner. We now do a podcast, but we were talking once, and Frank referred to Gaza. And Fay, who's normally very generous, sort of from a, you know, audience perspective-wise, looked blank.

And it suddenly dawned on us. Faye had no clue who Gaza was. Skilwoods? You'd never read North and South? She didn't, we should say. Her more is making a very funny joke because we are of course, if you are as young as fair, you might not get that joke. I'm of course talking about the football or Paul Gascoigne, but they've never heard of Gassett and I found that... Had you heard of Paul Gascoigne? Right, okay. Isn't that interesting? Because I, but you've heard of Gary Linneker, obviously, and you've heard of... But Gary Linneke is still presenting a big high-profile TV show.

Whereas the last time Paul Gascoen was in the news, he was trying to give Rao a sandwich. But I'm interested, because there are maybe some people who haven't been in the news for a while, which you might have heard of. Yeah, even like the World Cup squad in Italian 90, which I, you know... I couldn't pretty much name them all.

I couldn't, I could tell you three people probably. Because it wasn't... Yeah. Or even like... But that's my era. That's why I could list all of the... But you know, like, Paul Lynch, skulls. But those ones were there in like Euro 96. So Euro 96 would have been the first tournament I ever saw some of,

but I don't remember it. I was too young. But I couldn't, I probably couldn't tell you half the squad. I wouldn't recognize half the names, I think. I've never really, like, watch it back. Was Michael Owen's first tournament, 96? 98. 98.

I remember that vividly. That goal. Yeah. Against Argentina, yeah. Oh, see, Glenmore has even got sport up his sleeve. That's your thing. No, knowing Michael Owen is. So that's, that is interesting to me.

Yes, he's, slightly different generation than Gaza, but Gaza was around at that, you know, it's not like Gaza ceased to exist. Euro-N96 was his last one. True. Whereas Michael Owen had his own CBBC TV show. Watch Zero to Hero on CBBC.

In fact, we had Michael Owen on this podcast. I went to his house. Oh yeah? And he, we did him and Jenna, his daughter. And I really liked him, actually. What a nice guy. But it's so interesting how he's got this real, it's disgusting.

People that get up after 7 o'clock the morning make me sick. He goes, I hate liar beds. He's such a weird, vigilante. He's so strange. He's like, he's like with a nearer and taxi driver or like Michael Douglason falling down. He's like, he really wants to serve out the most boring justice you've ever, because he hates movies, doesn't he? Yeah, he said, he wants tweeted, and I reminded him with this, but he, it's interesting because I said, I said, Michael, do you remember when you tweeted, loathe films? It was a fact that He said loathed films. He's only seen ten, one of which is sea biscuit.

That's so funny, but one of the ten films he's ever seen is that. The sea biscuit. And then Gemma was going, he's a weirdo, he's a weirdo. He doesn't like films. He said, yeah, but it's boring. You could be doing better things with your time. It's a waste of your time. But what I find interesting is when I was talking to him about this boring image,

and he said, oh, but he said, I knew I was considered boring. And I do think he's quite smart because he said, But that suited me well because I never got as much harassment from the press. He said, and all those footballers that people saw as charismatic and interesting and glamorous, I never got hounded like them. He was a handsome guy. He was a handsome guy. You would have thought that would have absolutely loved that in the media.

He was never in the papers as much as David Beckham or Paul Gascoigne or even Peter Crouch. Yeah. And he said, if they said, I'm boring, they left me in peace. He said, so I did my best. I mean, maybe he's just saying that. But also I think he was boring to be on TV, but probably is still more interesting than the average. Do you know what I mean? It was just by TV standards he was boring.

Yeah, of course. Why should he be interesting? Oh, look, he's getting very hot now. Glenn, has it changed your perception of dogs at all this walk? No offence, no. But I've had a great time with Ray. Would you ever get one? I don't think I'd ever get a dog.

Why? I think in my head, I think in my head. I'd get frustrated at it being a child that doesn't grow up and can't. The ceiling, the learning ceiling, I think I'd probably find a bit frustrating. And I think... But what about when your kids get older? I don't crave companionship. So I think I'd be fine.

I actually, I think because, especially in my sort of line of work, is so social and public and so about talking to people, even though you're not necessarily being spoken to in return. I really like any opportunity to be on my own. If I come home, there's no one in. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. My favourite.

Because that was not me when I was like 18 through 25. And I was like, I wanted to be out all the time. Now I'm like, well, no, my job sees me out all the time. And out at those, you know, my job is a night out on a Friday and Saturday night sort of thing. So I'm like, actually quite a lot. So you never fear solitude? No, never. I get bored, certainly, after a while.

If it was like several days in a row. But, um, no. That's a good quality to have. Yeah, I'm glad about it. I'm not in any way anti-social, but I'm just, it's, if after a gig on a Saturday night there's a friend who wants to hang out, then great. But also, there's an opportunity to just get like a supermarket pizza and watch a film on my own at midnight.

I'm like, that is, that's a dream. But you know what that means? That means you like your own company. You're not frightened of your own company, which is a good thing. Yeah, no, I think I probably was frightened as a teenager because I was worried that people could see that I was having a night on my own, and that would be seen as like a really tragic thing. So I try and be out as much as possible. Isn't it great when you get to that

point in life and you think, I don't actually care? Absolutely. I really saw, like at uni, I saw friendship as like a quantity over quality thing. I'd be so determined to be friends of as many people as possible. And I reckon if I went back in time, I wouldn't be able to hold a conversation. But I'd just hang out of people all the time. We had nothing in common.

But it would, I'd just be so enthusiastic. It's the numbers. It was like It was actually numbers because it was social media just started. And with Facebook, you count how many friends you had. But, you know, even prior to, obviously, I'm old enough to remember pre-social media. And it was still that, Glenn. You know, it was like, I remember my late sister used to have a brilliant thing where she'd say, she'd say, oh, God, and she used to refer to it as people saying,

a whole load of us. Where she goes, a whole load of us were down there. Where it was sort of like trying, thinking, it wasn't about quality time with those friends. It was how many numbers could you draw? Yeah, absolutely. Whereas now, do you know what, I'm happy with my boy, Raymond, and Glenmore in the park. It's been great. This has been a great morning, and I'm definitely going to come and see you on tour.

Oh, thank you. To see. Please say, Glenn, I have some more. Do you know what, I would love some more. Will you say goodbye to Raymond, Glenmore? Bye, Raymond. It was lovely to meet you. You're a lovely dog. Can I just point out? Glenn went to officially shake hands, like he was getting received.

keeping an OB. I felt like Ray doesn't do fist bumps. It was like a royal greeting. Yeah. It seemed to go for it. Bye bye. I'm doing Raymond's voice, Glenn. Oh, all right.

Sorry, bye-bye, Raymond. I nearly put on a voice as well. I'm and I was like, why would I do it? That's patronising to Raymond. Would you do one thing for me before we go? Yeah. Would you do a news item about Raymond? Just one line, headlines you can do.

And Raymond has been officially announced. And Raymond has been officially announced. been officially announced as a dog. In short news. I really hope you enjoyed that episode of Walking the Dog. We'd love it if you subscribed and do join us next time on Walking the Dog wherever you get your podcasts.