Walking The Dog with Emily Dean - Greg James

Episode Date: September 20, 2022

In the first episode of the new series, Emily and Ray head to Hampstead Heath for a walk with Radio 1’s Greg James and his chocolate Labrador, Barney. They chat about Greg growing up with teacher parents, his love of radio, his first date with his wife, Bella and his latest book, Super Ghost. Super Ghost by Greg James and Chris Smith with illustrations by Amy Nguyen (Puffin) is out now! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Have you ever thought about what his voice would be like? Yeah, me and Bella have his voice. Talk a bit like that. Hey, hey, what are you doing? I'm just going to bring this bird in from the garden. You see, I think Ray would sound a bit like an elderly dowager and downtown abbey. I think Ray would say, what prey is a weekend? Yes.

Not altogether too fond of the heath. Actually, it's a little wild for me. This week on Walking the Dog, Raymond and I went. for a stroll with Radio One Breakfast show host, TV presenter and best-selling children's author Greg James and his adorable Labrador Barney. Greg and Barney met us on Hampster Teeth. They were greeted with a thunderstorm erupting and Raymond doing a huge deposit, so embarrassing. But even this didn't put them off. We had one of those incredible walks where you just totally forget the time. It turned into a sort of epic Lord of the Rings quest. But I blame him for being such fabulous company. We chatted about Greg's early years growing up in South East London with his parents who were both teachers

and obviously gave him a very stable, grounded outlook on life. He told me how passionate he always was about radio and you get the sense he was so focused. It actually didn't surprise me that he got offered a job at Radio 1 literally the day after he graduated. Greg was really interesting chatting about his learning curves, both professionally and personally. He's very honest about mistakes he's made and having therapy during a day. a tricky period in his life, and I really got the impression he's done a lot of work on himself.

It was also lovely hearing about how he met his wife, the writer Bella Mackey, and just instantly knowing she was the one. Greg also told me about his latest kids book, written with his ex-Radio-1 colleague, Chris Smith, called Super Ghost, and I know it's not intended for my age group, but I loved it. So do buy it for any kids in your life, or immature adults like me. I would sum Greg James up by saying he reminds me a lot of his Labrador. He's, full of positive energy, he's hilarious, he's loyal and dependable, and may I say immaculately groomed. I loved my chat with Greg and I really hope you do too. Please remember to rate, review and follow. I'll stop talking now and hand over to the man himself. Here's Greg and

Barney and Ray. Because he doesn't collect the ball and like a not a classic retriever. I have to collect the ball for him. Come on, Barney. Barney! Ray's so sweet. Unfortunately, Ray is not lucked out with the length of my legs and the length of Barney's legs because we do proper hiking.

I mean, I don't like what you're suggesting, Greg James, about his owner, frankly. Well, no, it's just that you'll be loyal to him. And it's going to start pissing it down in a minute. I was going to say, if it rains, I've got to brolly for the talent. but oh no my dog's doing a poo this is a bad start

right let me get the ball where's that bloody ball gone I could just sit near I think it will just pass I love it this is it's passing it's fine oh do you know that tells me a lot about grey I should say it's just started to rain and his reaction was so chilled you just said a little pass

I really love a rainy walk actually I do prefer I prefer it when it's I do prefer it when it's raining because there's fewer people around so you feel like the owner of the heath just checking your land where's that ball? That is a lot

I'm not chilled about losing balls definitely not chilled about that Barney where have you put your ball the whole episode will be finding the ball it's like a really shit version of finding Nemo finding Barney's ball It needs to be one of those investigative podcasts where you interview all the locals.

I saw the ball, I knew him when it went to school. I'll be like one of those Netflix interviewees saying, and from that moment we knew something was very wrong with that ball. Bonnie! Right, game over. Do you think it's not here? I don't know where it is. I feel like it's the sort of the circle of life, circle of balls.

at the end of your life, you get back exactly the same amount of balls that you lose. It's a lovely spiritual spin you get on it. That's a man who has prized many, many slobbery balls out of that dog's mouth. Well, with all the drama of the ball, I haven't introduced you yet. I am so thrilled and excited to have this man on my podcast. I'm a huge fan. I'm with the one and only Greg James, BBC Radio on Breakfast Show, presenter, best-selling children's author, passionate cricket fan and Arsenal fan, it's going to go well.

Greg is here with his incredibly beautiful dog Barney. Do you want to officially introduce us? Yes, this is wonderful Barney and this is Hampstead Heath and this is where I bring him every day, pretty much, for just The best walks. I love it. I love being here with him. And you asked me to meet you by the ladies' ponds. No, God to know. A bit weird. I hadn't realised how weird that sounded. But it's just because there's normally an ice cream ban up there. But it's not the summer anymore.

And he's fact off. But he just had a clap of thunder. That's good news, isn't it? Oh, yeah. At least that, oh, Greg, come on, let's go for shelter under the tree. I normally wear a sort of Dad Mac, but I forgot it today. Yes, I can see you in a Dad Mac. I think that's quite child of teachers. I think it is.

Do you know what you mean? Like, I suspect you're not too far away from having a phone attached to a wallet. Oh, fuck off. That is the most insulting thing anyone could ever say. No, you're too cool. But I wouldn't be averse to having a nice... a nice burghouse jacket if you need one. I can see that on you.

So, yeah, anyway. Barney is, he's a chocolate Labrador and you don't see so many of the chocolate Labrador's, I find. Not sure why there's five fire engines in the park at the moment. It's quite strange. You don't see many chocolate Labradoros, you say. Yeah.

Yeah, well we were looking at Battersea website four years ago. because he wanted a dog and Bella had my wife Bella had a dog that was aging. This is Bonnie, lovely Bonnie. Rest in peace, Bonnie. She died much younger than we hoped. She was only seven and she won't mind me saying this, don't think, but she, it was her, it was her first husband replacement. So, so she had a horrible first divorce, first marriage, she got Bonnie, who was sort of her little pal that she then tackled the new... Okay, now Barney's barking at firefighters

because he's got a problem with men in uniforms. He's not like me then. Bon Bon. Bonnie, leave the nice firefighters alone. Come on. Excuse me, what's happening? What are you doing drills?

You're doing some draining? Oh. Training. Oh, training. Draining. I thought, oh, I didn't... Oh, look, they're out in their little boat. They're out in their little boats.

Hello, how you doing? Oh, very well. Nice to see you. I'm good. It's not a real problem, is it this? No. Good. If you need any help, just let me know.

Cheers. Barney, stop barking at the firefighters. Barney, leave the firefighters alone. Barney, you don't realize how. Where's Christmas of the news gone? Where's Christmas of the news gone? I'm actually seeing it tomorrow. So I'll pass on my best wishes.

But yeah, we come up here a lot together actually me and Chris yeah for ideas meetings oh boy I'm just in the pub no shush palm okay he's I think he's got a problem with men in uniform maybe his helmets yeah he's like lassie's trying to communicate with you and tell you where all the problems are okay let's go see in a bit cheers nice to meet you guys bye oh my god no respect barking at fucking firehising Greg, I'm not being funny, but he really embarrassed you in front of those firefighters. I thought it would be nice friends for us.

They're so nice as well. They're just doing drills. They're just trying to get better at their jobs. All they're just trying to do is practice. Bonnie, stop being a dick. Bonnie. Anyway. So go on.

So Bella, I totally. So Bella's divorce. No, do you know, I really think, I relate to that and understand that. And I think that's a really good thing that she did for herself. Mm. So. Well, get divorced. Yeah, I think it was a great thing she did.

I mean, you're thrilled. I'm thrilled. I'm thrilled. I'm thrilled that it went up. Yeah, she did. But she, her and Bonnie tackled the new scary world of, you know, I've been through a wedding and I can only imagine how horrible that must be to go, oh shit, it didn't work. And this thing that everyone goes, the wedding is the thing. It's the thing that is your life.

and it doesn't work and then she sat there going, oh, balls. So anyway, long story short, we had this lovely rescue Frenchie called Bonnie. And she was so calm and so lovely. And we decided to add another dog because I always wanted one. I never had one as a kid. And we went to Battersea. It was the day, it was the two days before the Brits because I remember bringing him home.

and Bella just going, oh my God, what have we done? And I had to go, I've got to go, Brits. Sorry, I'll be back. So Bella was on her own. On the first night, we had him as he was just terrorising the place and just being so frightened and young and shitting everywhere and all the rest of it. And I was like, I have to go to the Britsk, bye-bye.

I've got to go and interview and do a leaper. So, yeah, so we found him at Battersea. And I couldn't believe it. So I'd said to the people who were sort of showing us around, I said, well, I'd love to have my ideal dog. I love retrievers. I love Labrador. I quite like big dog dogs.

Because my cousins had an amazing retriever when we were growing up. They lived in, they're from Weymouth. We used to go down to the beach and play with Max. And I used to love it. And Bella got there before I had and said to the lady, ever you do, don't show Greg, that dog. He was called Marley at the time. And I got there a bit later and I saw Marley and I went, this one.

It has to be, we have to have this one. After this guy. And we've got this amazing photo of him jumping up at my chest, which I've romanticised in the aftermath now, saying like, he picked us. But of course he didn't, he just wanted somebody. Which better than made that photo into a t-shirt which I wear on my dog sometimes. Oh my god, that's the nicest origin story I've ever heard. But it's horrible when you see dogs in in those centres and everything. And obviously they're being very well

looked after there, but they want to have a home and an owner. And I think the story, the loose story with Barney is that he was he was dumped alongside his sister. Because I think the family had kids, basically. I mean, the Tay is old as time really. They had kids and he was eight months old and they were like, we can't deal with this and he's no longer a cute Andrex puppy he's a big, he's becoming a sort of dinosaur which he is today

and I just felt so sad for him because he's so happy and so sweet but he's anxious, you could see him he's like anxious around the London Fire Brigade Yeah but he's such a lovely nature's sweet dog He is sweet well he doesn't have a bad bone his body He just is a bit scared of things Hey Greg you know what I've heard to me

Is it more shelter? Should we go down here? Let's go into the woods. Let's go into the woods. Nothing bad ever happens when people say that in films. I wonder what other emergency services are in here. That's quite exciting to seeing the firefighters, isn't it? But anyway, that was a long introduction for me.

Thanks for inviting us on the podcast. I'm really pleased to be on. Well, I said let's go into the woods. Oh, we're straight out of the woods. We're straight out of the woods. But it's fine. I can... This is going to sound weird again.

I can take you into the woods if you want. Let's do the woods. We'll go into the woods. So I want to go back to Little Gregg. Yes. And we're going to talk lots, obviously, about all the incredible stuff you've achieved. And I do want to talk to you about your brilliant book, Super Ghost, which I've read. Have you?

Have you? Have you? Have you? You've read it? Yes. Oh, wow. It's so good. I want to go back to Little Greg.

Yes. Gregory. Is it Gregory James, Alan? Yes. Millwood. Yes. I love an Alan. Alan for a child. It's my favourite thing.

Well, it's my dad's name. Oh. Yeah. And you grew up in, is it Lewisham you grew up in? Grew up in Bromley. Bromley? Yeah. And both your parents were teachers. Yep. Would you say you were,

were you sort of confident? Were you extrovert? Or were you quite shy and quiet? No, I wasn't. I wasn't confident or particularly extroverted until I got to fifth year. Or maybe sick form even. Yeah, probably even sick form. I was, uh, I wasn't. but I was definitely quiet and everyone in every interview says shy, don't they? Actually I wasn't shy, but I was definitely not the loud one.

I wasn't the kind of, hey, let's all go and do something. I was very much the, right, they're going to go and do something. We'll just sit and watch, I guess. Or I guess I've always liked observing stuff. You weren't first through the door. No, I wasn't. But I do remember being passionate about certain things and I remember loving things which, I don't remember being particularly sad.

I didn't love school really, I quite liked it. It's interesting with kids who grew up with teachers as parents. I find them an interesting breed. Sometimes people who grew up with parents who are teachers say there's almost a sense of, like focus on them in a way because you're sort of an ambassador for your parents. Do you know what I mean? Well, my mummy and daddy wouldn't think

that was very good behaviour. I don't think you should be doing that. Did you see what the teacher son did? Do you know what I mean? Was there ever an element of that? Did you feel a sense of responsibility? No, because I was never the teacher son in school because they were, thank God, nowhere near my school.

They were at different schools and that was a real, I felt very, very grateful for that because there were kids. in my school whose mum and dad were teachers or there was one school I was at where his this kid's dad was the head teacher and it's just a nightmare because he's just a he's just a snitch isn't it he's just a he's just a spy and you're just like well we're not going to talk to him because he'll report everything what are you going to do to tell the police everything what was your household

like sort of atmosphere-wise that i always have to describe my family i say it was sort of noisy bohemian Yeah. What was your household energy? It was really fun and... And it's your sister Catherine. Yeah, like a good gang. I'd say it was a really good gang. So yeah actually just back on what you're saying about being the son of a teacher man in a school. A difficult follow-up single. I'm the son of a teacher man. I think that it gave me a respect for teachers because I knew a how stressed and worried my parents were at on results day for example or if there was a bad kid I knew how my mum and dad would wear that I knew how sad and anxious it would make them

and teaching almost killed my dad I mean he had to retire early because he took it all so personally and he found it very difficult to separate He was a head teacher at quite a difficult school in Enfield. And he was a young head teacher. I think he was a head teacher by about 44 or something, maybe a bit younger. And he was so excited. It was like his dream thing. He'd managed to rise up through the ranks and kind of break out of his family

and go and be a teacher and, you know, win, essentially. But when he couldn't quite make that school, work or in his mind couldn't quite make it work with all the kids there and the pressures of it and all the rest of it it sent him almost mad and he was he was really really ill from it so he had to retire at 51 and it's really sad oh Greg yeah because he had quite bad sort of well and now I suppose there'd be a lot more understanding and awareness around yeah there was nothing there was real there was absolutely it was just like oh dad's just stressed yeah

And our dad's in hospital because he had palpitations or whatever it is. I remember that feeling. So I never really wanted to piss my teachers off too much because I thought, well, teachers are great people. They are by and large completely selfless and just do the most fantastic job. And it was amazing to see my mum and dad do that. Sorry, Greg, I'm just going to pick Ray up because he's been quite irritating now. Ray. Come on, Ray.

You're lagging, Ray. Yeah, it's really interesting. I never thought about what my parents would have done if they weren't teachers. I don't think there was ever a, I don't think they would have ever used their powers for evil. God have been a bankers. It's interesting, seeing, learning more about my mum and dad since getting older, because I think you're not that interested when you're a kid. But since the whole world is obsessed with class and where you're from and all the rest of it, I think it is interesting that my dad really was one of, he was one of six and he was basically the only one who left where he grew up to go and do a job outside of where everyone else all his brothers, sisters were doing stuff.

And I find that quite interesting because he obviously had a huge ambition. And that makes me understand how sad he was when he had to just go, oh shit, that's it at 51 and I'm, I can't do this anymore because it's going, I'm going to be dead. So I find that interesting. And similarly for my mum is that I think she wanted to get out of where she was and wanted to teach and found that really exciting. And I think they got a lot out of it. I think they really, really loved it. And that is inspiring.

Were you popular with girls? Were you the sort of... I see you as sort of like, oh, Greg's coming. The truth of it is I didn't... I wasn't until I went to university. and then I was a bit more than I had been. And I hadn't been very popular. I haven't really ever been massively confident in lots of areas.

I've been always very confident in doing radio stuff and slightly nerdy, technical things. I've always been quite confident in being able to play sport, particularly cricket and stuff. But I was really... I just hated the idea of... going out with anyone until I was about 16 or 17 probably and I just remember vividly hating that my best mates were going to the next town to go and meet girls they'd met on

MSN and I hated it and they were like oh you want to come to we're going we're going to heartford for the day this is when we'd move we'd move to bishop storkford by then because my My dad was working in Enfield, so we moved a little bit. Yeah. And he went, we're going to, we're going to Hartford for the day. I went, okay, that sounds like the fucking worst thing ever. What are you going to do? I'm going to meet some girls we met on MSN from the whatever school it was.

And I just thought, I can't, I don't want, and it wasn't me being snobby, it was me being terrified that that would, what do you do? What am I going to do? What do you do there? I said I'd rather just sort of, I don't know, I'd rather be at home. I'd rather just do anything else, rip some jingles off the radio and practice with them or go on some forums or where it was to look at some radio gossip. So it didn't really happen for me until I went to university and thought, oh, this is really fun. Oh, girls are reacting in a positive way, whereas I thought they'd react in a positive way.

Whereas I thought they'd react in a, oh God, go away. Because at school you have the sort of the mean girls, don't you? And the mean girls always felt like, they felt like women, and I felt like a boy. I felt like they were just always taking the piss out of me. And I think probably, at a certain extent, they were. But I remember having, I remember fancying people, and I remember trying to make girls that I fancied laugh and stuff,

but I wouldn't have the courage of my conviction, really. I just, I think it was, as I said, sort of year 11 in sick form, I got confident and thought, oh, I can make people laugh. I like this really, I love this feeling of messing around and doing that. But yeah, it wasn't for the one to trying. And you went to university, didn't you? Went to East Anglia. I did.

And you did drama. And I get the sense from what I know about your time there. It's really interesting because, you know, I suppose a lot of people use, university just to kind of discover what they want to do and just saying, oh, this is good. I can laser about a bit for three years and also learn about stuff, but also it's a great social life. Yeah. It's interesting.

Reading about your experience, it seems that you were pretty focused and determined already on wanting to work in radio. I think I was, yeah. I think it was a combination of a few things. First of all, I started doing English and Drama. So I did English and Drama for two years. and then Radio 1 really started to take, excuse me, take off in that final year. And it meant that I just couldn't be around as much.

And I was doing, I was depping for various people and I was going up for meetings and I was doing stuff. And how did that all happen good? Because you started doing that hospital radio and then you were doing sort of student radio. Yeah, hospital radio when I was at school in the times when my friends were off in Hartford. This is pretty, isn't it? this bit. Yeah, hospital radio in those teenage years and then went to university did lots of community radio and amazing station called Future Radio in Norwich that used to have a license every quarter I guess and they would do sort of two weeks of shows and I would always go please

let me do something please and then yeah live by was my student radio station and I would just do loads of stuff there but I also really love the idea of maybe acting and doing and being an actor one of the one of my options in my head was oh well I could maybe go to drama school and I definitely I did the National Youth Theatre and I've really enjoyed oh Barney's in the pond with blue-green algae let's get him out of there Barney Bon Bon Bon come on Barney come here come here come here come on I mean that's quite a big stick ahead this is the thing he also does is that he will find a stick and then he'll drag this for the rest of the walk.

I need to deposit this poo otherwise Greg James has been abiding memory of me stinking of shit. You've got a poo in the hand. Although you walk past a biffa. I will find another one, right? Let's go back to this biffa. No, you can't walk around with a poo in your hand. It's a bad luff, isn't it?

Is it just in a tissue? Yeah. Put it in the ship bag? No, it's in a ship bag inside a tissue. Oh, okay. I thought you just... Oh no. I thought Raid is such dainty shit that you could just put it in a small.

in a small Kleenex. So how did the radio one thing happen? Because you were doing, I mean, that's the sort of stuff of absolute dreams, isn't it? That you suddenly, whilst your university, get offered at Joelbert, the biggest radio station in the country? In my first year, I did so much student radio. There was a thing that I discovered,

and I didn't discover it, but people told me about the student radio awards, which are supported by the radio industry. And I submitted a demo for Best Presenter. And I worked with a few of my mates who were doing the show with me. And we came up with this demo of all the stuff I'd, because obviously I recorded everything because, you know, boring and a nerd. And I thought, let's record everything, because you don't, you never know.

And we made this really good demo. And I listened to it quite recently, actually. And it's OK. And that was it. And so I won that award in 2005. And part of the prize, or the prize, was to do an hour's show. show pre-recorded to go out on the bank holiday Monday in August.

And it was the most exciting day of my life. I went up to London to meet a producer and we worked on this show and I brought all the clips and I brought all the ideas to him and all the rest of it. And it was really down to him because the show went out and the boss eventually got around to listening to it and gave me some feedback and said, oh, keep in touch and all the rest of it and of course I did keep in touch. And then he said, we'll just go away, finish university, and we'll see where we are after that. And I did loads of stuff in between, loads of radio stuff, loads of plays, loads of comedy stuff, loads of, you know, whatever else.

And went up to Galaxy in Newcastle, there's an amazing man called Mike Cass. He gave me a few tryout shows to do during my Easter holidays and summer holidays and whatever. And I went up to Newcast and did a few of those for, you know, a couple of weeks on end. And just getting better, I suppose, just all of that. 10,000 hours. Well. But you did them at, you know, when you were still... A thousand. Yeah. You did your 60 hours. Yeah, but you did them when you were still a student and I... Yeah. I do think that tells me that you were quite committed and driven. Unusually so, I suppose, because... I absolutely wanted to do something outward facing. I knew that it was radio, comedy,

dramay, actory, something. Yeah. But radio was the thing that was the constant in my life, I guess. And I could distill all these things that I had listened to and watched and read into making a show. And it was just the thing that was, I guess, most accessible to me, because you could do it on a computer or you could just do it to yourself in your bedroom, so to speak. But what holds a lot of people back is, I suppose, fear. Do you know what you mean, that sense of,

Who am I to do this? That everyone has to a degree? Yeah, but I think I flipped that in my head and thought, well, somebody gets to do it. And I did think that. And I remember listening to people thinking, wow, well, they're just, you know, they're just a person. They're doing a thing. Why couldn't I do the thing? And I did, I've always loved the feeling of, well, not always, but when I got older,

I really enjoyed the feeling of performing. Is what, sorry? Oh, yeah, that way, yeah, yeah. It's this way, yeah, down there. Thank you. Yeah. I think that's often a sign of good parenting. Or madness.

Maybe both. No, but it's, if a kid has self-belief, not arrogance, but self-belief, that means, I think, often, I mean, it comes from within, obviously, I'm not taking the credit away from you, but I also think it's often a sign of someone who's been raised feeling sort of unconditional love. feeling safe yeah yeah I was really I was encouraged to do whatever I wanted and there was never any pressure to do any job I mean obviously there would have been at some point there would have been a pinch point to say get off our sofa you lazy 28 year old or whatever but you wouldn't have done that though would you I wouldn't have done that I don't think but I was lucky that I managed to to get out and do stuff and did you listen when you were growing up was it Chris Evans was

your my breakfast DJ was was Moyles My entry point to Radio 1 was Scott Mills. I remember getting up when he was doing early breakfast to go to school. A story which I remind him of every now. I was going to say I really loves you but... Which he hates it now, because he's like, you know, he's a statesman now. You really, I really get the sense with you though, Greg, because people who are quite driven, I'm thinking of Frank actually,

who's people that are quite driven about their career, and quite focused, laser focused on their work. Yeah. I think it sometimes bleeds over into their personal life and who they are. You know, like they tend to be the sort of people that they don't hit the snooze button. You know, they sort of, they commit to things. I am pretty disciplined, yeah, you're right, I am pretty disciplined. And I feel lucky that I can switch it on and I can switch it off, I think.

That I am, I have been really, I was quite laser focused on, making sure I got a fun thing to do when I left university. I was really wanted to do something fun. And whether that was doing a radio show anywhere or going to go to drama school or do something in telly or radio or I just really, really wanted to do that because I knew it would be fun. I just knew it would be. Yeah.

So I was just seeking fun, I think, all the time. And at 16, at 18, I was really fearless and I loved that feeling. You're just, I guess it's like new comics or something, and just go, oh fuck it, I'm just gonna go and do an open spot. Yeah. I'm just gonna do it, I'm gonna go to Edinburgh for a month, and just be mad. I'm just gonna go for it and I love those sorts of people

and I love those sorts of jobs where I was up at the fringe a couple of weeks ago to see a few mates doing some stand-up shows. And I love that, the outlook of all those people sitting around drinking, being silly, being tragic, being happy, being, you know, all of those things are really fun, aren't they? Yeah. Those sorts of people, I mean you love being around Frank and all those sorts of people. They're brilliant people to be around because they are just plugged into the world and I love that.

So I was really, I am really ambitious with that sort of thing. But equally, I've got so much better at switching off. Have you? And just being satisfied with what I have done that week or that term of the show or that year of the show. And the first time maybe ever I had a properly relaxing summer holidays. where I went, I feel really proud of the last four years of breakfast shows and all the other stuff. And I feel really happy that I've given enough time to my parents. I've seen my friends enough.

I've done enough interesting other things in my life. Sounds like I'm signing off. And I'm here today to say, Emily, I'm retiring. Sounds like Chris Pan, handing over Hong Kong. That's it, I'm done. See you later. But I felt like that. I felt like I could just bow out for two weeks. And it was only two weeks, but two weeks in radio, as you know, is like a lifetime.

So I just turned my phone off for the first time properly for over a week. And it felt amazing. And I didn't feel panicky. I didn't think, oh my God, I've missed an opportunity. And that was a nice marker for me that I thought, okay, that I've done, I've done what I wanted to do. So everything else now is a really exciting bonus, which in another way is a different sort of ambition.

You go, well, now, what can I do now? There's loads of fun things that could be around. So I think finding that fearlessness that I had when I was 18 is really important, a really important breakthrough for me because what's the point of being worried about it all? It's radio shows, it's writing books, it's presenting stuff. I know I can do it if I apply myself and use the time I would be for worrying. By the time I put aside for worrying into making something good and interesting.

But anyway, yeah, I do feel very, very, very lucky. And when you were at university, because your graduation night, and everyone else was out getting shit-faced, you were thinking, I've got to get up for work early tomorrow because I'm presenting on Radio One. I'm starting on Radio One. I mean, I'm not going to lie, I would have really hated you. I would have been so jealous.

Were you aware that you didn't want to almost alienate people? Were you sort of conscious of keeping, I suppose, humble about it, you know? I think I am still like that. I think I'm still like that. I don't bowl into the pub with my friends and tell them all the amazing, mega-exciting things that I've just done on the breakfast show that week. That would be completely, that would be psychotic. But I've never done it for showing off reasons.

I've never wanted to go and want that show to just make you feel like shit. I've always wanted to do it because it makes... That's where we're going to have to park company, but I'm sorry. I cannot get on board with that attitude. The only reason I get up in the morning. I don't understand that. The only reason I take jobs is to make other people feel like shit. Look at me, I got this and you didn't.

You're terrible. I, yeah, I wanted to do it because I've really enjoyed it. So I didn't do it to spite anyone. I get the sense that you always wanted to do rather than be, if that makes sense. That there's a big difference. My dad would always say that to me, that a lot of people want to be on television. Oh, I see what you mean. But you've actually got to want to do it because it's a job.

And it's such a big distinction, I suppose, isn't it? Yeah, I've always wanted to do radio. Yeah. And the fame thing, the people that I really, really look up to, or looked up to when I was a kid, I suppose, were famed. not because they were famous but because they'd done interesting funny smart good things and I that's that was always my I always had that in my head and I probably wrote that down somewhere when I was being lame as I was leaving

university or during university I thought what what's the common thread through all these great people like you know Wogan and great old comedians like what why why do I love Michael Palin? Why do I love Michael Palin? As it's all the things he's done, it's not because he's everywhere, or he was at that thing, or went to that party,

or went out with that person. I think that's, so I guess it, yeah, that was really important to me, is that I could just go and do this job. It just happened that this job was in front of lots of people. I mean, there's nothing better than having a great caller on a radio show because that is, that's the whole point,

that's the whole point, of being there is that you're having a conversation with someone and they want to talk back. That's why radio is the best because there are no airs and graces, there can't be and there shouldn't be, because that is what it is. It was a massive change for me. And actually, I think what you're saying about wanting to be on the radio as opposed to wanting to do radio is a change that happened to me from university until I was about 23 or 23. So you think, right, I want to be on the radio, but then you understand it a bit more. And I went through a few years of it and I went through loads of shows and you get to work out what's special about it.

And the real turning point for me was real I was doing it anyway, but realizing what my role was, which is being the ringleader and being around. And probably that's an answer to your first question, which is what was like, kid. I quite like being around sort of going, oh, this is a fun thing or how about this or have you seen this or what about this? Stickerbook or whatever. I think if they were planning a heist in a sort of Ocean's 11 type set up, I see you in the middle of it all. You'd be called like brains or something. Hey brains. Come on. And you'd have all the maps out. Yeah. And you'd be organising it. I love that role. I really love that role of being the ringleader of

silly things on the show I do at the moment, which is, here's a great caller with an amazing story. Here's a funny clip from last night's telly. Here's a great new song. We put it all together and I'm sort of conducting it. So, you're like a social architect. I am a social architect. That's right. That's exactly what I am. That's what I'm going to call you. I want that on my headstone. You are. You build things. I'm sorry. To the woods. To the woods. Follow break, everyone. Bum, bum. Do you know, I'm saying this because I'm walking slightly behind him and he can't really hear me. But, Greg James, come on.

Come on. It's such a good nature, charming man. I've left you for dead. I'm talking about you. I'm saying very nice things. I can't hear you. I hope you not slagging me off. Come on, Ray.

Come on. Look at the woods. This must have been, I mean, you've been doing the breakfast show for five years now and you'd obviously prior to that, you've done the early breakfast show. You've kind of earned your stripes on really at one because, because, unlike most people, people who sort of, you know, you'll do local radio and you'll build up those hours. Yeah. There was a lot of focus on you in a way. You were at the biggest station in the country really.

Do you think it took you a while to find your voice as it were? I think the really interesting thing was that I started on the early breakfast show, as you said, in 2007. And I was deliberately hidden by my boss because he knew that. He was very, very smart. It was Ben Cooper. He's a really great bloke. And he was really the reason I'm on. He did change my life.

And that is an extraordinary thing to say about someone. But he said, we want people to... And I remember it because he sat me down before the show started. We want people to find you. We don't want you to be thrust in front of everybody. We want people to think that they've discovered you on that early show. and I think that worked, that did happen.

And I still had enough naibity about London and the media and how it all works and all the rest of it just to be who I was at that time but on Radio One. And I think they were some of my best shows. I really do, because I was just having fun with The Callers. I had an amazing producer, I felt really safe, and I felt really supported. It's nice when Barney sits down

because it means that he's finally relaxed. And I was just given two years to have fun and learn the Radio One Ways and get better and all the rest of it. And then when I moved to the afternoon show, I think I overthought everything. And then thought I had to be somebody different

because I was now doing a daytime show. I'm in the same lineup as Moyles Mills, Joe Wiley, Zain Lowe, how do I fit into this? Well, I've got to be famous. But actually, the trick was never, it was never that complicated.

I should have just kept going as I was. So there was a couple of years of uncertainty, and I think that just means that was also personal life stuff of just being 24, and you're a mess at 24. Where are you, do you think? Yeah. I think you probably should be, to a certain extent. You can still, you know, be functioning and, you know,

go through life and be a functioning adult. but and it's hard as well because that for you most people are sort of getting that out of their system for want of a better word phrase you know in their local pub or something but of course you're known by that point did you find that difficult suddenly though that there was more focus on you like your personal life I suppose or you're in the papers more and it was that must have been suddenly like oh I didn't know this was going to happen yeah it's kind of weird I did feel like I was going against all the things I wanted to achieve which was I just wanted to be good I just wanted to be good I was I just wanted to be good I was I just wanted to be good and I was I was I was I just wanted to be good radio but you I guess all everything happened you you can't hide if you're it's too much of a of a contradiction you can't be a really successful well-known radio presenter or comedian actor blah blah and not be written about or talked about that just doesn't happen because one thing feeds the other and vice versa but yeah i just i wanted to make sure that the that the people were wanted to were talking about me in the right way and they thought the shows were good essentially. But I don't think I was, I was never off the rails. This is not a Chris Evans.

No, you were, it was more just that it was a sort of hot young thing about town, you know, it was more associating you with behind the velvet rope, I suppose. I think you have to try that. Yeah, because why, you would never know. You have to see what that's like and be tempted by the bright lights of the city and all the rest of it and see what it's like. And then I would quickly retreated and went, no, don't like it. Don't really like regular. carpets don't like that thing and I had another great bit of advice from Ben when I started which was he was talking about Chris Evans and when it switched in his head on the Evans breakfast show is when Evans started talking about how

exciting it was to be having a wee next to a famous person I think it was someone like it was someone like Ronnie Wood or something he was like I just had a way next to Ronnie Wood at this gig or something and he's really come back and you come back and you tell your listeners that's really exciting and then it flipped towards the end of the breakfast show where he was hanging out with Ronniewood at his house or something. I've made the story up a bit here, but the idea is you've got to stay on the side of real life.

And I do like that, and I've always been like that, so why would you change? I still find it exciting, crossing that invisible line of, I'm backstage, I'm sitting with the band. That still should be amazing. It shouldn't be the band calling you going, where are you, Greg, can you coming backstage? Yeah, if you're at the Great Gatsby's party,

you're Knit Carraway. You can't be Gatsby. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? So that's it. That's how I've always seen my role and that's how I like to be. I don't want to be, I don't want to be in the middle of it. I like sitting around watching it. I love the access that you get. I mean, I went and did, Coldplay asked me to introduce them on stage a few weeks ago.

And I've loved them since I was a crybaby teenager. I've thought they've been, I've just loved them. But I've got, you get to know these people, obviously. and that's really great because you interview them and whatever. And Chris Martin asked me to introduce them on stage. But I'm not best friends with Chris Martin, but we know each other a bit. But I was still observing in their, not in their dressing,

in their backstage area beforehand. And it's not like I'm hanging out with them, like chumming up with them. But it's just this, and I could tell that story the next day on air, honestly, and just say, I felt so excited because of this, and I saw this and I saw this and I saw Simon Pegg walk past, and I saw Steve Coogan walk past. Oh my god the band then went out and all the rest of it so you can there's there are ways of doing it I think and I do like As you said about radio being a great leveler you do I think you to do it well you need to be on the side of the listeners always

And you're with them but you're fortunate enough to go out and report back and go Yeah, you never guess what happened and I think that's cool But I told my mates that story this weekend. I was on my one of my best mates stagdoos this weekend and they said what the fuck happened with Coldplay? Why the fuck were you on stage with them? And I told them exactly how it happened and that's how essentially how I said it on the radio. So I think it takes a while

for you to work out how to be true to yourself publicly and outwardly. But you don't strike me, I don't think you've got a huge ego because I think... I think I do at times. Do you? I think you have to sometimes. But I think you just need to know how to deploy it.

I mean, I definitely am too vain with certain things. things and I'm definitely, I definitely get a bit head up with wanting to do the next thing and the next thing. So I think it would be disingenuous me to sit here and say I don't have a big ego. I think everyone who does these sorts of jobs has an ego that does pop out. You just got to know how to control it. I'm interested in Vain Gregg. What's Vain Greg like? Oh, like my hair, for example. I don't know, I just, I've always been obsessed with my own hair, but it's an insecurity thing. I never think I look good enough. I always, I look

I get a photo myself and I hate what I look like in photos, for example. So I just have a bit of an obsession with it, I think. And you're not confident about how you look, is it? No. Not really. Sometimes. Yeah, I don't think I'm amazing. But you can't think that because that's not funny either.

No. That isn't funny. I said to Bella, when we first met, I said, I don't know who's gone out with before, but just letting know there's no six-pack under here. Because I think six-packs are not funny. And there's nothing funny about going to the gym all the time. What are you doing? Sorry.

Barney's just... Barney, that is the loveliest sweetest dog and you're an idiot. Sorry. Barney has an interesting approach to making friends. Do you know what it is, though? He saw that tiny Westie walk up and went, Greg, this is an emergency. There is an attacker.

There's a terrorist approaching emergency. And that's why... he went mad. He's just protecting me. Whereas Ray, on the other hand, was like, every man for himself here. Oh, look, Ray's come over. Come on, Ray. Can I pick Ray.

Yeah, and Barney, sit down with me. I need to, I need to just quickly, I want to talk about your fabulous book. And I also, but I want to ask you about Bella because that's so, I get such a sense that you really felt, you've met the right person with her and you just, that was quite an instinctive thing, was it? Yes, it felt like,

I felt like that was the missing piece of it all. I was merrily going about my business and having a nice time on the show, really focusing on making my work good, making the show good, having a good life and being well, and dating a few nice people and sort of ridding myself of toxicity and shit relationship decisions,

and there was a couple of bad ones that I got rid of and out of my head as well. And then, yeah, Bella was around. And I think it was the same for her. She was doing a similar thing. How did you meet her? Did you remember when you first met her? Yeah, we met on Twitter. I found her really funny.

She did a tweet a couple of years previously and then we'd followed each other. And then a year later, she DM'd me to say, I'm looking for people to write opinion pieces or comment pieces for The Guardian. Would you be interested? We're looking for people to write stuff. And I said, yeah, it could be interesting. Yeah, yeah, cool. Let's chat.

Never really did follow up on that. And then maybe a year later, she'd moved to Vice News. She was the Deputy News editor at Vice. She said, we're still looking for people to write, but now for Vice, are you interested? Get the hint, Greg. Yeah, I took the hint. But, and then we just chatted a little bit. And it was ages, it took ages and age and ages.

And we exchanged numbers just because I was going to go into the vice office and meet her. Exchange numbers and then that never happened. But we just chatted about things. Nothing remotely sexual, just about the news, about Donald Trump, about awful people, about who we hate. And that's a really great way of falling in love with someone, is having common things, common hatreds. people you find exhausting and awful and whether it's an influence that you think is the pits or, you know, a terrible prevention. It teaches you someone's values, doesn't it? It does, yeah.

Yeah. And she, we should say, I mean, I'm sure people will be familiar with Bella's work, but Bella's a fantastically talented writer. I'm a huge fan of her books. I just am a massive fan girl. I think she's amazing. You're kind of my dream couple. So, and when you first took her out, were you nervous? Because I think when you really like someone, you're so much more nervous.

Massively nervous. Yeah. But she was as well, it turns out. Imagine you're doing your hair. I bet you took ages that night. Oh, we had the old brawn independent out. I had the whole bloody glam squad around. Yeah.

Thanks to my glam squad. Oh my God. Louisa on hair. Ginny on makeup. Yeah, the whole team were around. Red carpet ready. But we had a really great time and I do remember being nervous and I remember she took the piss out of me for liking cricket Which is fine because cricket is quite boring

But I love it and she I dared her to wear a fashionable cricket jumper Because she said she had a cricket jump she said I don't know anything about cricket but I got cricket jumper She loves she loves she's very very fashionable and as it looks amazing always She wore this cricket jumper and I thought that's a it, that's the one, she's brilliant. And then the sort of sweetest, but it was the saddest part of the night was... We can walk now, because it's nice and sunny, isn't it? At the end of, at the end of the, we went to see some comedy and, and at the end of it, she was like, oh, do want to go for another drink or, I mean, yeah, well, I've actually, I've actually booked

dinner. I've booked a table somewhere, because I just assumed I was being a grown-up. And she was, since that event, she's talked to me about how surprised she was that I'd done that because she'd had such shit dates beforehand that had never happened. It hadn't happened in a couple of years. I was like, fucking hell, the bar is so low for men. But I just thought that how mad that that's not like a bit more normal. Particularly because we'd known each other for ages and chatted for ages. I thought, anyway, so we just went for dinner and then that was it.

I basically, yeah, not to be too graphic, but I didn't leave her flat all weekend. But it was, and that was it, and I never dated anyone else again. And it was really lovely and she's just, I think she's amazing. Oh, it sounds like you married your best friend, which is really, you know what I mean? Or someone who became your best friend. And I think that's such a good basis that you obviously connected on a lot of

levels, you know. Well, I just think she really, she really brought out and brings out parts of me that I was maybe too frightened to bring out. She keeps me inquisitive with things. I mean, she reads everything. She consumes everything. She just reads, reads, reads, reads, listens, listens, listens. And that inspires me to keep doing that as well.

And I think probably the same for her that I encourage her to go and do stuff. And I say, look, you can just fucking do it. You know, a bit like how I thought, listening to Radio One presenters, I thought, well, I can do that. So when I read novelists, I just say to her, you absolutely can do this. You've got these stories in your head and you know exactly how to write them. So go and do it. So I think we meet in the middle. And, yeah, we just have become great support for each other to all the good bits and the ship bits, which is how it should be.

Look at these dogs. He's really catching up now, Becky. I think he gets a good energy from you. Well, I want to talk about something very exciting, which is your career as a best-selling children's author with your great pal and ex-Radio 1 colleague, Chris Smear. Lovely Chris. He's a newsreader on Radio 1.

And you, was it five years ago, or longer than that now, that you decided to write kids books together? Six years, yeah, six years since Kid Normal. Kid normal. and they took off. Yeah. Oh, listen to that dog. He's got Christmas bells.

I saw you roll your eyes when we mentioned the bells. Well, they just keep going on. Hello. Oh, they're ever so sweet, but it's good. You're sweet, aren't you? What sort of dogs are they? They're Irish terriers. Don't worry about that.

But they're only nine months old, so they're a bit wild. They're great. Oh, they're really lovely. I love the bells. Barney loves the dog with a bell. I don't get you some bells, Barney. Come on Ray.

Like Rudol. You hear them coming back. Yeah, that's true. What are their names? I'm waking up. What's this one? What's this one? Ruby and Rusty?

Ruby and Rusty. You like Greg, don't you? Ruby and Rusty. You're sweet. Okay. You see Greg's, and Greg, Ray's like the weirdo at the party standing on the corner. Look, he never gets involved.

That's me at primary school. Ah, Rusty, I like Rusty. Rusty's quite that. She's so noticeable. I like. Rostie. Rastie, Rastie, Ruffie.

Come on, Barnie. Lovely to meet you, Rusty. And dear, I'm sure you'll hear them again. Dashing through the snow in a one horse open sleigh. I love. I love, I relate so hard to her dog embarrassment when we first took Barney because they were just jumping up at her. When the first walk we took Barney around the heath, Bella was on.

Bella was like, take him off the lead, it's fine. I went, oh my God, I can't. He's so mental, I can't do it. Took him off the lead, ran down a hill and just jumped on a child. And the mum was there, next was going, excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, and like, oh for fuck, and Barney was just going, Oh, I want to play with his five-year-old.

It was harrowing. Because look at him, he's such a lump. I find that, but don't you find him, Greg? I love my dog with, Such intensity that if I'm walking past and someone doesn't say, what an amazing dog. I say, don't worry, Ray, they're obviously not dog people. I think, how could you not comment on him?

Ray, like such a lovely grumpy face. Do you know, he's never barked? Has he not? It's a superpower. Wow. Talking of which. Anyway. What are we talking about?

Talking of superpowers. Oh, we're talking about books. Yes, Kid Norm We. We did that about six years ago. and it was a huge success it has been we are so blown away by it still and we feel we are very very still in love with those stories and I can't quite believe that kids still well the amazing thing is because of the way the world works there's always kids being born yeah there's always a new generation of kids who you see at these events and they're like we've just we've just bought kid normal as well I go, oh yeah, because in my head that's old. But yeah, it's brilliant and we're still going. And we...

There's a new generation of kids who are so young. To them, you're like some elderly rolled doll figure, like the nice old man who writes the books in his cottage. Hey, Mr. Were you that fighter pilot? Actually, you have got the look of a fighter pilot. Do you know, I'm just looking at Greg... Is that good? You've got... I've worked out what you are.

Oh God. I like to place people. like to place people in history. Oh, for that's sake. I know, it's a bit weird. No, it's not weird, it's just, I know. You are? I don't think it's gonna be a compliment.

A kind of, I think American may be. Right. It's a bit, I don't know, but I've been told, one, two, three, four. It's because I've just had a very short haircut. Oh, I've cut off all my long hair. You'd like me in the film Yanks and the English lady would fall in love with you and you say,

I'm sorry, I gotta go. Oh yes, I see you in a jet or something. in a jet. So you've got to, what is it? Is it geography teacher or is it fighter pilot? Because I'm wearing a burghouse at the moment driving a Spitfire. And I don't know where that fits. Oh dear.

Well, this is the beauty of you. Right. You've got it all. Because I think, I'll tell you what you are, Greg. You've got the reliability of the Labrador and the dependability. But there's a slight glamour of the, of the poodle about you. Okay, that's fine.

Yeah, the primping. Yes. I got my hair cut for this interview. Did you? That's how vain I am. It's a podcast. So, having had this huge success with your books, I'd say, oh great, I've written those books I can put my feet up.

Not Greg. I think you get addicted to it a bit, and I need to watch that. But as long as you're addicted to the right bits of it, I love working with Chris. and making a thing that wasn't there before. That is such, I know that's fundamental creativity, but I get such pleasure out of making a thing that didn't exist a month ago.

And then to see it on a shelf and to see it in a school and to go to a school assembly and host an assembly with kids, probably where I exorcised my, should have been a teacher, demons. And I can do an assembly and then let the teachers go and do the boring stuff.

It's an amazing feeling and we love doing it and they're such a great age group to write for because they are They're fearless and they don't care if they say something uncool and They think we're sort of Brilliant and these mad men in their school just doing stupid voices and it's a great it's a great it's a really great crowd because they just want to be fun and listen to your stories and then tell them you mad things that they've thought of in their brain. And so we love doing it.

And it really is as simple as that. And it's called Super Ghost. Super Ghost. Super Ghost and it's basically about this kid who idolizes his superhero. Yeah. Doctor Extraordinary. But there's kind of a bit of a twist because he ends up meeting him but not in the way he'd imagined.

And this is the genius of Chris Smith. So we came up with all this stuff. and we based the city, Paragon City, on Chicago because we did a trip to promote Kid Normal in Chicago a couple years ago and we had the greatest time ever and we had such a laugh and we're like, oh my God, we're actually launching a book in America. This is, look at us! Look at us doing this!

And we fell in love with Chicago, so we said we're going to have to do a Chicago-type adventure, make it feel big and adventurous and just a big scale type thing. And within a few minutes, we'd come up with the cityscape, we come up with the idea of the characters. And then Chris said, how about the tagline, don't worry, the hero doesn't die at the end of this story, he dies at the beginning. I went, that is fucking great. That's it. And that is on the book. So tell me, you seem quite

a thoughtful, reflective person, Greg, as well as quite a happy person. But how do you deal with times when you're not feeling great because all of us have those times don't we? Yeah, I definitely, I overthink. Do you? Everything. I overthink all decisions, especially work decisions sometimes. If there's a thing that comes in, I will think about it for way too long. Do you catastrophize ever? A bit, not really. I'm quite good at controlling that now, I think. And I've got a good network of people, basically my dad. I'll call him and just go, Panicking and panicking. And what is Alan say?

Well, we'll just go for a pint and just talk it through. And that's normally good. I'm quite good at helping other people do it because I think I inherited that from my dad. So I'm really good with Bella when she has a wobble or is feeling terrible or something. So we can just sort of sit it out and talk it through. But what do I do?

I definitely struggle with the early mornings. I definitely struggle with sometimes the pressure. I definitely struggle with, oh my God, is it going to be good tomorrow? And then I think, I started overthinking and go, how long do I do it for? How long should I do it for? How long do I want to do it for? How long do they want me do it for? So I do think about those sorts of things.

But I talk about them. How are you at confrontation? When I met Bella's mum and dad, I obviously asked Bella what they thought of me. and Bella's mum apparently said to Bella he's really lovely and no one's ever said this about me before but he's got a steelyness and I went wow does that mean

she thinks I'm a c-ha-ha-what does that mean that's what what what? But I don't know I guess if you get to do these sorts of jobs and stuff and you want to push yourself through I think you I don't think you can do it if you're a if you're a complete sort of wilting violet. Interesting.

I think you do have to have a certain amount of, no, no, no, that's not right, or I don't want to do that, or this isn't for me, or, so I think, I'm okay with it. I think I'm okay. Would you ever have therapy, Greg? I do have therapy, yeah. I have a very privileged life where I'm able to afford a therapist, so that's the first problem is there's not enough to go around really. and you know even if you try and book in and want to pay for it there's actually it's quite

hard to find a new one at the moment as I'm finding with a couple of my mates who I'm helping through some stuff it's hard to find these people because there's so many people struggling with various things but I took it upon myself about eight seven or eight years ago from no I was 28 I had a really bad breakup and I was just all over the place and was really really unhappy and really sad and lost and like what I just thought I've got this great job but I sort of don't care I feel like I'm not enjoying it and I can't find the joy in it and I went on a I went on a trip on my own I went to New York on my own and actually my sister was out there for a couple of days so I saw it for a couple days and I was on my own

for a week and a half. And I just had the most amazing time where I thought, what am I? What am I doing? How do I exist if I don't have that relationship? How do I exist in the world without that person? Yeah. And what would I be like if I didn't have that job?

And what am I like there? And I just sort of threw myself open to it and booked an Airbnb and just lived in the city for a bit. And that was part of trying to heal myself, I guess. And I amazingly met someone and had an amazing sort of fling in New York. And I was like, oh my God, I'm alive. This is brilliant. This is so fun.

Wow. And then I started doing therapy and I sort of, and that finished, obviously, and I started having therapy and I just kept myself away from people in that way in terms of relationships and just did therapy and found a brilliant person who also did acupuncture. I did a bit of that and I just really really helped me and I think about it all the time and I I still think of those practices that they teach you of right what's the real feeling you've got here what you actually what does that actually mean is this worth getting upset about is this worth getting sad about is this worth and I think I just realigned all the important things in my life

and just went this thing that thing that helps me here I go and do that to make me feel happy I do this person, I see that person to do that. And there's like a map in my head of things to go to if I need to, you know, top myself up with fun stuff or serious stuff or whatever. There was a period of time where I was just not being a good person. I'm not good enough person. I wasn't being an awful person. It's not being a good enough person. I had a relationship that I was terrible in and that it was the greatest regret of my life.

I was unfaithful. and I still hate myself for it. But it was because I was in a bad way. And so that that started off, and I had a series of quite bad relationships, and I was just not being a good person, professionally, personally, all the rest of it. And I needed to just wipe the slate clean

and go back to basically what I was like when I was 19 or 20. Just relax, like calm down. What are you doing? And I got better at work because I started welcoming everything in and making sure that I was sort of shining a light on other people and don't even recognise that person actually anymore. I feel quite embarrassed about that person. But Greg, I think,

I personally think that what happened was possibly you staved off the infection and the infection is fame. And do you know what I mean? It's toxic. And I think you get to a point, you're very unusual because it's very hard. You have to work at it, but you can come back and it's totally, you can redo it. And those mistakes are actually really useful, horrible and hurtful at the time, but I found them really, really useful

because I just don't, I don't ever want to go back to how that was. So that's the thing you take away, isn't it? Right, come on Barney. Barney, I might have a treat in there for you, but sit down. Have you ever thought about what his voice would be like. Yeah, me and Bella have his voice but I don't think it's the actual voice. We

think he'd be dozy. Yeah. But actually, we talk a bit like that. Hey, hi, what are you doing? I'm just going to bring this bird in from the garden. What you doing? What are you doing over there? What can I eat that? Oh, it's a sock. Can I eat that? No. Yes, I like that. You see, I think Ray would sound a bit like an elderly dowager and down to now. I think Ray would say what prey is a weekend? Yes. I'm not altogether too fond of the heath. Actually, it's a little wild for me.

Look at this weather. Horrible. Do you want to go to the bogs? Oh, this is okay, isn't it? Greg, I have absolutely loved our walk. I've loved it. I really have. I really have. I do like to go for walks with friends around here.

with friends around here and I do catch up with people on the phone around here so it's nice to share it's a nice place to be isn't it and also there's something nice about a walk in the you're not staring at the person the whole time same reason why it's nice to catch up with someone so walking next to someone there's less pressure to just keep looking and oh my god this weather let's go to the toilets let's go to the toilets you've taken us for shelter where do you want to tell everyone when you've taken us we are something outside the ladies toilets Near the ladies pond.

Which is where you asked to me. I'm just saying, if you started at the ladies' pond, you finished at the lady's toilet. Yep, I'm a pervert. There I am. Greg, will you say goodbye to Ray? Ray, it was so nice to meet you. Look, his little grumpy face, and I don't blame him.

Would you like to see Barney again? Oh, Greg, he hasn't said anything. It's not resounding, yes, is it? But I think the feeling is sort of mutual because Barney... Barney's good because he's happy wherever he lays his hat. he likes dogs and then he forgets about them and he sees him again and goes oh i remember you yeah do you know what i've decided barnie's a bit like you very good nature you're not the first one to say Bella thinks that I've just got a dog who's essentially in my image

well we love you Greg we'll see you soon bye bye Greg thanks so much bye bye in reality we're staying here to the rain stop I really hope you enjoyed listening to that and do remember to rate review and subscribe on iTunes tunes.