Watch What Crappens - #1671 RHONJ: Gym Tan Luis

Episode Date: February 24, 2022

*Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* The Real Housewives of New Jersey head down to the shore, where Teresa flips out on production for not leaving poor Luis be. This week's bonus episode is about Celebrity Big Brother and air fryers. Find all of our premium bonus episodes at https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. We're on tour! Coming to St Paul, Milwaukee, Chicago, Philadelphia, Washington DC, Pittsburgh, Detroit, Columbus and Cleveland! Get our tour stop dates and your tickets at watchwhatcrappens.com and find tour merch including new Crappens leggings and pins at crappensmerch.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running.

I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running.

I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running. I'm running.

I'm running. I'm running. I'm today, honey? Oh, I'm just waking myself up with some lovely McDonald's ice coffee, which I am drinking out of a watch or a crap and tumbler thing. Isn't it so cute? It's actually adorable. It is really cute. And you know what, the man. You know what, the man. You know what, the man.

They're wine in there. That's what you have a rodeo in, okay? Yeah. This is what you take your alcohol in the car. Yeah, I tell you to take it in. I feel like I'm like, we're doing crap with none to man. So this is on video, which is why I'm, which is why Ronny can see me holding up

this little adorable cup. It looks like I've got three hands holding it up. Isn't that weird? Looks like there's a good third hand in there. But I feel like I'm like, at least I run up, I'm like, I can get this. Get your tubular, and your get this, get your tubler, and your dusters, on QVC, how are you?

How are you product, please, Vince? Yeah, go get those over at crappensmerch.com. You can find that links, that link at whatchwoodcrappens.com. That's also where you will find a schedule and ticket links for our live to all. We just had a weekend in LA and San Diego. Those were such fun shows. Thank you so much to everybody who came

and gave us a great night over there. We're coming up next week. We're going to St. Paul, Milwaukee and Chicago, followed the next week, the Lidlavia, Washington DC, Pittsburgh and Denver. Guy! I'm like, it's your tickets. We're going every place, okay?

And there's a whole bunch of cities other than that too. So just go see if you're cities there, okay? And then come to the show. Yeah. And keep an eye out on our social media because that's usually where we first announce what shows will be recapping at our live shows. We haven't figured it out yet.

We haven't even started thinking about that because we're still getting out of our LA hangover. But we will probably have an update. There's a lot of, there's like Bravo, of course. This is one of those moments, we're transition moments between seasons, we're provost throwing like a million shows at us, and we have to figure out how we can

recap them without losing our minds. So, just stay tuned. You know, we just never know because this week, there's no OC on. Why is there no OC on? Nobody knows. Nobody knows. They're taking a lot of breaks though.

But it's not on and instead, we're gonna be recapping below Dex sailing for the week. So, you see, you just never know when the schedule is just gonna up and change on you. Nature finds a way, you know. It does. It sure does. But we do ask you what our shows were excited for those.

Yes, and today go out. Today is Real Housewives of New Jersey. Oh, it is episode season 12, episode four for those of you who need it. And it's it's a real humdinger of an episode. Yeah. I laughed. I laughed. who need it. And it's, it's a real humdinger of an episode. Yeah. I laughed. I laughed. I mean, this is also, I'm like, this is like our third Jersey recap in like four days for us because we did the LA show. Then we re-recorded the LA show. And now we're doing this. It's just like, wow, it's a lot of Jersey in our lives right now. But um, where we left off was that there was this fight

that was happening at Jack, he's quote unquote, keg party where Dolores was like, you know, don't talk to this, don't talk to this. I don't need to hear it from this. Don't call me this, don't call me this, don't call me this. And we come back like is Dolores going to punch Jack in the face? Is she gonna say that instead of this? Who knows? Yeah, because Dolores going to punch Jackie in the face? Is she gonna say that instead of this?

Who knows? Yeah, because Dolores is gonna, what are you gonna do about it? Like, getting in her face, and doing all that kind of stuff. So Benino's like, Frank Dolores is off the chains. You know, so Frank, I was gonna say run over, but he doesn't, he just like,

oh, over. And he's like Dolores. So Frank, I was gonna say run over, but he doesn't. He just like over. And he's like, go worse. Go worse, come on, go worse. And Marge is like, what's going on here? What is this violence? Like seriously, what is this even going on? And Dolores goes, she's getting a manoeu.

Yeah, and Frank tells us, you know what? I've done Dolores since she was 19 years old, and the lawyers grew up on the streets of Paterson, and she's a street fighter. She got to find the bar, and she bit to a girl's, to do it for two of her nails, okay? So when the lawyers goes into a rage, you need to separate her. What does that mean she bit through to her nails? Like was she biting a girl with mittens on, and then she bit through the mittens, and then it got the girls nails? No, I think that like the nails were the starting point on and then she bit through the mittens and then it got the girls nails

No, I think that like the nails with the starting point. She thinks she bit through the nails. I think that's what it was I know she's like a nervous fighter. They're like to Laura's you've got to stop biting people's nails when you're fighting I've got to find a healthier habit It's like it's I can imagine Dolores being empathetic while fighter like you, you know what, you should be very nervous right now, because we're in a fight, you should be fighting. And you know what, I'll buy your nails for you. Okay, let me buy your nails. Yeah, yeah, that you feel nervous now.

So everyone's afraid of Dolores, because she's from Paterson, did she forget? Which Paterson sounds terrifying. And now according to this show, wow, how's the tourism board in Patterson doing? Because... Yeah, Patterson doing? Because- Yeah, Patterson does not always have a great reputation. And this show does not help.

I'll just say that. So Evan's like, hey, sweetie. He just comes kind of walking up. He's like, hey, sweetie, everything okay over here. And Jack, he's like, she doesn't even know who she is dealing with. And he's like, okay't even know who she is dealing with and he's like okay She's dealing with someone who's very good at throwing a kick party

Then Dolores Dolores is over with Jen and she's like if you don't think I'm your friend If you think I should I should support you more you don't tell her AKA this well now she's far other ways and I'll change her to that one You don't change it, you don't talk to that, okay? And she's like, I was just trying to be honest about my feelings. And she goes, you can not even close with her Jennifer. What do you want to swit her about? And she's like, but we're starting, we're starting to be close. But then she wants to pick a part your friendships. And then Jackie is like is like Jackie's like I'm not picking I'm not picking up her friendships. I'm telling her because I guess Jackie has like arrived

She's like I'm telling her so that she doesn't rely on someone who's not gonna follow through Now I think in this fight Jackie's actually correct because Dolores did say oh Jen I'm on your side and then once she was somewhere else with Marge, but she came back and then she's like, I'm not on your side anymore, stop you crying, all right? So I guess I can see what Jackie's talking about, that Jackie's going way too hard for stupid Jennifer of all people.

And Jen just fucked you over by getting you in trouble with Dolores. And Jen never apologized and you're still fine. What's this new rule about Jackie's not gonna get mad at Jen over anything anymore? It's the second time Jen has done this. Yeah, yeah, well I still have my theory that Jackie is just investing in the I was a good friend bank, you know, she's just waiting to be able to she's she's she's actually just like assembling a card that she can pull later on like I was there for you, I was there for you card.

So, so Dolores is like, you know what, I've done more for my friends than you would ever do in a million years, Jackie. And then Jack is like, well, you have no idea what I do, which is I can be friends with both of them. I don't take sides this, this. I am going through an emotional ring of right now. Okay, Jackie. So look at me. Look how emotional I am. I know. I love the

words. Everybody look how emotional I am. Everybody should just go fuck themselves because I know who I am and I know how I backed every one of these motherfuckers. So, that's Dolores. So, Dolores is like, I think I'm working out themselves. I'm just like, well, last, you know what? I would work it out myself, but last time, Jen, she didn't want to talk about it. And you didn't want to apologize. The last time was you just going, you know what, Jen, stop.

You did it to yourself. Okay, you did it to yourself. Okay, you did it to yourself. So the Lord says like, Madam talk! So, Margin Jen go to the side now, and Margin's like, you know what, Jen, if I didn't wanna come for you. Okay, remember how I tried to walk away?

I would take like three steps away and then circle back, and then take three steps away, and then circle back again. I was actually thinking about it, but you know what, listen, you judge me and she does the top of the finger counting where she's like, the top of my index finger is number one, where you're like, oh, she's pissed.

She's like, but you know what, you judge me for having an affair, you crucified me. And Joe's like, see you on the hill, I'm always the bad guy. A gentleman's like, it's not the same. And Mark is like, what is the same? Okay, your husband is like me, okay? He started a fabulous fashion line that everyone loves and got sued by a whale once, okay?

And you know what? You called me slutty for the same behavior. And that's what it was. And Jen's like, okay, baby, that's fair. How we're in on you a little bit too much with your relationships. So suddenly, Jen is pulling back, which I think that Jen is just exhausted by this. She just knows she doesn't have this damn amount of keep fighting. She really doesn't have the team to start to keep fighting.

I mean, if she doesn't have Dolores now, she's only got Teresa who's not there, and then Tracy who literally, I mean, water her. You know what I mean? Yeah. So also, Marge, I mean, water her, you know what I mean? Yeah. So, also, Marge, I think, finally made an important admission here, which was, I'm not saying general affairs are the worst. I'm saying, I'm the cheater and Bill is the cheater, so you're forgiving Bill, but calling me a slut, which hasn't really been laid out yet like that.

So I think, put out like that, Jim was like, oh, she's still saying you were slight. Okay. I can accept that. Yes, I can accept that. Except it now, you know. And then Jennifer's like, I'm just starting to realize that now that the way she's been boasting about her affair,

that that was a real trigger for me. Which is funny because Margaret's not boasting about it, but Jennifer still adds that sort of editorial comment to it. She did. March did kind of boast about it. Well, I wouldn't say boast, but she definitely started the show like, I met my husband, I was married, he was the handyman, and that's it.

It was romantic there, because she wanted to put it all out there before someone could be like, you cheated on your husband or whatever. Right. And so she does kind of, I mean so she does put it out there for sure. I just wouldn't call it boasting, but Jen does. Jen is still having to make that dig. She was like, oh, now I realize how things are.

She's a slut, but even slut have feelings. So then she tells Margaret that she was quick to judge. And then she's like, you know what? I thought about I was thinking, I mean, what if this girl that built cheated on me with who's going around bragging about her and affairs my husband, baby? If I ever heard that, that'd be so hot, Ranching.

Oh, it would be worse than heart-wrenching. She'd have a job on the show, okay? They would get her ass on here immediately. That's exactly right. So, Jen's like, but I still gotta tell you, I was very hurt by what you did. But you know what? I was hurt by the decision to put wires under your bra, but you know, but that's how bra was all. So there you go. So they come to some sort of truth and Jackie

and Dolores are talking and Jackie's like, listen, all I was saying was she should surround herself with people who really, you're questioning my friendship with her? Listen, you know, it was just like this keg party. It was wrong. It's just wrong, all right? And if that worried her, you know what? I would call and say, you need me? Then you tell me. But this is not okay. This is not okay.

You know what? The Laura just brushes up people's feelings. And when I was going through the infidelity room that last year, I was not okay. It put me on a really dangerous path. My eating disorder and a real friend doesn't just assume you'll get through it fine. What are only mothers allowed to do that? Yeah. So I broke my leg, you'll be fine. Mom, my finger fell off. You'll be fine. Mom, I think I've got it. You'll be fine mom. I think I've got it. You'll be fine stay in the house Just fine. Yeah, but also like

It's that's my dad you're fine. You're fine. Like literally like the place is burning down. You're fine. Don't worry about it um, but um, so then uh, so then we go back to Jen and Margaret and Jen's like listen Yeah, I'm pushed me intentionally. Okay, yeah, I'm bushed me intentionally. Okay, yeah, I'm bushed me intentionally to hurt me. She's like, I didn't, I didn't ambush you. Okay, I didn't ambush you. Everything's out in the open. She's like, it's how I felt.

It's how I felt. It was like, how I got so excited when I saw a fox on the black bear bear bear. I was excited. It's how I felt. Do you understand why I kept it a secret, Bill, not the fox. It's like like why would you keep it a secret? It's like because of my family my kids my parents I'm orthodox I didn't want to humiliate them. I'm just like it's not gonna humiliate them.

And she's like yeah well my end-laws are gonna blame me for everything baby. And Marge is like what are they gonna say to you? And Jen tells us she imagines that her in-laws are going to say that she was a bad wife and she just wasn't sleeping with Bill enough and that's why he had to cheat in the first place. Yeah, I'm like, you know what else might be embarrassing for you that your in-laws might hold against you. Literally everything you've ever done on this show, everything Jennifer. So Marge, you know, you're putting

up a front to try to cover up for people. And you don't have to say how great he is. Because no, but it makes me happy to say how great he is. Bill's great. Look how happy I am now. Do I want another one for Deli? I got to keep guessing up my husband's head March. And she's like, do I want to pass up another infidelity? I mean, what do I want to do? Guess up another infidel, but not making up, think I'm great, but not making him think he's great. And I was like, oh, wow.

So now he's gonna cheat on you if you don't make him feel great and manly enough. Yeah. This is like a bad toxic marriage. Okay. Yeah. Exactly. That's exactly correct. I mean, like, this is the age-old narrative that we're trying to push against that, oh, men can just do whatever they want. And if they do something that's terrible,

that's not their fault. That's in their nature. It's the fault of the people who should know better and should be containing them. And that's like actually not the way everyone should be accountable for their own actions. Okay. All right, just the way I was accountable when Vineyard Bines came after my ass. So, yes, I saw you made like a mouth face like you were about to say something. Oh yeah, well this girl and I are father apart and I ever thought, I mean, she's brainwashed into believing

that all women have blamed for men's bad behavior. You know, not just the other woman, but the wife too, it's actually very sad, which I agree with, you know, that's not anyone else's right. That's bills fucking that's bill Ultimately, this is still bills fault. Okay, and his his decision in his choice and he did it So then Gents like months pregnant Nine months pregnant

Okay, nine months pregnant. So Jen is like, well, I just don't want to hurt him. Mark, you're not hurting him. Okay, just the one who's hurt. Okay. So then things start to then like kind of settle down a little bit and like things are settling down with like Jackie and with Dolores. So that's like, that's like the cue for Melissa to come in and start inviting everyone to the showhouse. And Melissa goes up to Jack and Dolores and I'm like, are you guys good at Jack? He's like, yeah, we know how to talk like adults. You guys just got into a fight over the word this.

So now there's kickstands going on. Margin Jenner trying to finish her nice conversation. They decide that they're're gonna move past it. Meanwhile, Frank's like, wow! Wow! Trying to get, watching everybody try to lift Frank as the guy's damnedest, but it's like watching people

try to lift like a car off of a pedestrian, you know? It's like it's not gonna happen, okay? That pedestrian is dead. It's like when they moved that spaceship through the streets of Los Angeles 10 years ago, when they had to like, like close down the Briah, they had to get like an extra wide vehicle just to transport it.

Like that's what they got to do with Frank to get him up for on top of that cake. And the beer's just dribbling right out of the house. The cake's just like, I know. Okay, it's, okay, it's, structural integrity is coming into question. Yeah.

So of course, Melissa is just going to rank going, we're going to the shore from a shore party, right? Yes, Melissa, everyone's dying for your fucking shore party. Okay. I can't wait to see what me on cursive signs you've added to the collection. All right. We'll be there. And then Tracy does a keg stand also, which is, you know, she looks

putting a pencil in a fucking, you know, in a pencil cup on your desk. She literally looks like this. She looks like my coffee with a straw sticking out of it. That's what it looks like. So, um, now it's the next day. Everything is settled for the moment. Now it's the next day and we go over to Dolores House where you see Dolores, dog, dog. you want to match me today? You're getting as fat as me, okay? This is your new harness. Do you love it? The dog's like, well, I'm not fat. I have a condition from falling up those stairs. It's so funny to see Dolores dress her dog as a unicorn of all things because I feel like Dolores is like, you're not that special. I feel like she's the kind of person

to say that to your dog. You know, like, hey, listen, you don't have to bark at everybody coming to the door. No one's coming to kill you. You're not that special. I also just don't think that she, I don't see her as someone who dresses up her dog.

I just see her saying like, it's a dog. It's a dog, it's an animal. You don't put clothes on an animal. Not that type of people. Okay, I didn't grow up like that. It's a dog. It's an animal. You don't put clothes on an animal. Not that type of people. Okay, I didn't grow up like that. It's a dog. What do we? What are we idiots?

Would she say about the family meeting? Like, what do we don't have family meetings? What are we loses? What do we lose? We're trusting up dogs having family meetings. What is this new wage bullshit? But this is Gabby living at her house, I think. Yeah. She's like, all right, Gabby, I'll put the fucking unicorn thing on

on the dog. We named dog because it's that special. Okay. It'll be the most mythical beast in all the land, Gab. You know, dog, stop crying. Dogs like I'm not even crying. I'm a dog. Yeah, you know what you're crying. You're weak. You're weak dog. So then Jenna, Jenna Teresa are on FaceTime But Teresa has a really bad connection and it's funny how you still get all of the tree out of the conversation

So Jen's like hey babe house boss It's true It's like okay, so she went to legal seafood. She had some nice chowder and she went shopping about Drianna and Louise there too. Got it, totally understood it. So then there's dramatic music because Jackie is going to the Renbrew Medical Center.

Renbrew. Yes. Renbrew. So at first I thought it was like, oh, this is a place where they make beer for Renaissance fairs, Renbrew, but then it was actually much more serious. It's the next kind of turkey leg factory. The turkey leg factory. So, um, so Jackie's going in for therapy. And these, it's a very serious scene. And these are those moments where I feel sometimes bad

for these professionals, these medical professionals who get roped into doing these shows. Because they're not, they're not used to being on camera and they get nervous. And this poor girl, her face was, she was pulling a lewie. She was so red. And I just wanted to, I just wanted to be like, you don't have to be nervous right now.

Like, this is a very forgettable scene that you're in, right? It's as serious but forgettable scene. Just don't worry. You can just do your job and we're not judging you. Of course we're judging or we're watching a TV show. Everyone's judging her. I saw something, some thread like that. Like, oh my god, what was up with their red face? And then everyone was like, how dare you? How dare you comment on what the red face?

And then it became this whole big fight. And of course I read the whole thing. I didn't even really notice that she was turning red, but I was thinking I would be nervous too. I mean, if I was there in this scene, I'd just be like, hi. Hi. Hi.

I just feel so bad for, I just wanted to hug the lady. I just want to talk about. Where you want to talk. I ran some tests on you. It was fine. I pressed buttons. So she's asking questions. So she's asking questions. And Jackie is just telling more about her struggles with an eating disorder and everything.

And the lady is just sort of, it's like an information gathering session. And we're finding that Jackie, as sometimes her fingertips go numb, she's always called her circulations basically terrible. She's not getting enough nutrients. And she also has like a really slow heart rate as a result of this.

And so, and when she gets up, she gets dizzy. So something that I thought was very interesting that they tell her was that it's not like she can just start, Oh, just start eating right like don't just start like you just start like you know say like I'm gonna start eating now because that would actually it might actually shock her heart into cardiac arrest I had no idea that that was a risk. Did you know that Ronnie? Oh? Yeah, because I did that 43-day water fast member a long time. And I got really, I got like, I lost so much weight doing this. And I just kept going because your body like just stops getting hungry. It was so weird.

And I just kept going and going into my friend told me, I'm calling your mother. Like, if you don't stop this, like this is, this is a sickness at this point. You know, and I was like, what, I feel great. No, my eyes were like, blink. I looked crazy. But yeah, you know? And I was like, what, I feel great. No, my eyes were like, the link, I looked crazy. But yeah, you have to learn with that stuff. Like when you start eating, you have to start eating like a bite of watermelon.

And then later you can have maybe some broth. And then the next day you can have whatever, cause it shocks your body, your body will go into shock. Yeah, you can have also. Yeah, I had no idea. It's pretty crazy. So that was basically that So basically she is going to have to check with her doctor and make sure her body is okay So that way she can start the recovery process. So I'll say and learn something. So thank you lady who works at the Renbrew

She also said something about guys. She's about how she got You know where her eating disorder stems from, you know, as you talk about when you have these discussions. And she was like, you know, I just remember being chubby. And then I remember wanting to lose weight. So I would cut more and more out of my diet until it was nothing. And I just remember in high school, there was this guy who, I just remember overhearing this guy who said he wants a girl who he could pick up with the spinky. And those are all the girls that the guys wanted to say. And you know, when I finally got there, people were paying me so much attention.

I just didn't want to leave, you know, and that's just so sad because so often it's for like approval of it's like for fucking basically. It's for, it's for approval. Like you want to be the most fuckable, you know? I'm not saying her specifically. I mean, all of us as humans were like, I just want to be hot, but then you finally get one of those guys and they're just such pieces of shit, you know, and they probably gave you something to, you know, and that same guy. And yes, he probably did.

And on top of that, that, now that same guy is probably like, oh, yeah, the Kim Kardashian type is what I want. Now he probably wants someone curvy with a little something on the bones, which just goes to show these women just get fucked up or by guys left and right. Like take on a needing disorder because you want, you wanna get fucked by this guy and then he's like,

I wanna move on to something. Do you like how America is doing? You spend all that time, you just do. Well, you change his mind now. Well, this guy is a piece of shit, I want to move on to something. Do you like how America? You spend all that time. Well, you change his mind now. Well, this guy is a piece of shit, but it's true. You know, because different things, it's like when you make your little pencil eyebrows and then 10 years later, people are like, why do your eyebrows look so stupid? You know, it's kind of like that with everything. You know, so you lose all this weight to get that type of guy, then he's like, I want

to come Kardashian and then before you know it, you're putting fucking, you know, whole hams in your butt and getting the ladies and just died. A lady just died. I saw this headline last, I don't know why. I think I looked it up when we were in that Uber to Los Angeles. A lady got like, did it have like homemade or unlicensed but implants and I killed her.

So, there. They had like homemade or unlicensed but implants and I killed her So there I mean unlicensed but implants. I mean serious people come on Yeah, you don't by the way don't do that anyone don't do that Yeah, it's like the old Things like you don't the things you don't buy at the dollar store, you know light bulbs batteries Contents but you don't buy but implants. But implants, they're, they're trickier than you might think. It's time for commercial.

It's time for a crap and sc... Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build up, why it happened, and the repercussions.

What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows, it snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up any time soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums.

Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. Come her show. Now we go over to Dolores at a restaurant and here comes Frankie. So Frankie comes in and I love that we go from ass implants to Dolores. Dolores comes like bouncing in the restaurant like hey, are we just talking about ass implants because I'm not having it this All right, I'm not having it So Frankie comes in of course like I it's kind of funny. I was thinking about it like

How do you make fun like I think it's so funny that Frankie is such a good kid. Everything he says is just so supportive of Dolores and so agreeable and just cheerleady and everything. He walks in and he's like, hey, Mom, this place, look at this. Look, has a mother ever picked out a better restaurant in my life? I'm so blessed.

I'm so blessed to have a mother who can pick out a restaurant Like this the way you hold that menu. Ma. It's great. It's great. Do they put oil on this bread or butter? I don't even care because you're here. Ma Every time I see these this I'm like, uh-huh. Yeah, he's just trying to get laid because that's the Italian thing You know, you know how a man's gonna treat you by the way. He treats his mother You know like every compliment hit he gets Dolores is another ring on his blowjob bell. That's how I look. Good for him. So yeah, that's how you get your blow jobs, not by body shaming someone by treating your mom right. Well, yeah, it is a nice evolution

of behavior. We see on this show, isn't it? So Dolores is like, all right, Frankie, oh my god, you're the most beautiful thing. Listen, hug me, but I don't want to get makeup on you. Oh, you've already got makeup on you. That's okay, mom. God, you've also got makeup on your, Jesus Christ, you got makeup on your whole shirt. Frankie, you've got makeup on your zipper, Frankie. So then Gabby enters and Frankie does a variation. Uh, we didn't actually hear too much.

Uh, there he is, but Frankie does a variation of it, which is, look at this one. Look at this one. A big thing in Jersey pointing out that someone has entered the room. Look at this one. And then Dolores has her version, which is, ah, doctor. So she's like, all right, here's the thing. You guys are going to be living with your dad full time for the first time since you were born. All right. And so that's why I called this family meeting for losers. All right. I tried to book a reservation at loser restaurant, but it was full amazingly enough.

So Dolores is like, all right, Gabby, what's your problem? You don't want girls in the house, right? Is that it? You don't want girls fine. No girls in the house I wanted all out tonight everything would discuss it Can we just start with running water and have the meeting when everybody's out of warm bath? I know that'll probably get a much better Communication so so then you have Gabby's like yeah, I mean Frank doesn't realize it's disrespectful when he has the girls over So he walks in. Yeah. I had you go. I got you going.

Oh, well, can we get another candle here? Frank spat all over this one. It's out. Anyone. And they've got double waitresses because I guess one's funny, but they've got like, do you think does anybody want to be on the real house? Why it's like, both of us, both of us. So they're there like the waitress twins and a Frankie tells Frank look at the side or Frank tells Frankie look at the size of this guy

So they're like okay Frank are you gonna order a drink and he's like hey, yeah, I hear you make a good tequila bomb They're like at the Tequila mockingbird. He's like do they bomb the birds good. I hate the fucking birds bring it up Bring five. Maybe with a shot of his pretto too. Could you do that? What a strange name for a drink to kill a market bread.

Why don't you even bring a market bread into? I don't understand it. Frank, it's a book. Huh? What is it? Nevermind Frank. So, uh, the things the Lord's.

All of your friends have thrown at them, Frank. All right. Now I don't want that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So the Lord's like, all right, we're gonna lay down some rules for the house, and ideally we'll also lay down some railings afterwards. Okay, no boats, no hose.

No boats, no hose. And I'm sorry, I was looking at Tequila mockingbird still. I was just transfixed. I was like, what do I, I was actually thinking, I wonder what's in that drink. Probably tequila, Ronnie. Well, they probably did like, eh, so we're making a drink called

at the Kila Mockingbird, we put some tequila in it, we killed the crow out back and we curated up into this cocktail. So then Frank, Dolores is like, listen, I don't want any trouble on did this roof and he's like I know you guys got concerns okay I know my life's time didn't conduce with to a family living all right but I'm still the fucking father of this fucking family and Gabby is like it's about being respectful to

when there are the people in the house. What are you trying to say? You know exactly what I'm trying to say. No, I don't. I'm still kind of hung up on that whole tequila mockingbird thing. So my brain's a little scrambled. Just be a little more clear about this. It's like, listen, you know what I'm saying? Oh, so I'm not allowed to bring women home and to have sex with you. Is that what you're saying?

No women to bring sex home, which? And Laura says, that's right. No sleep over us. He goes, all right, all right, all right, all right. So you got a girlfriend, you don't got a boyfriend, but you know what, what are you gonna get a boyfriend that not have sex in the house? I mean, come on.

And what sex anyways? They know what is it? Come on, then tell me what it is. Frank's like Frank. If you don't talk like that, okay, you know what? We don't talk like that. Stop it Frank. Stop it.

And Gabby goes, Here's how we talk. We hear Rebell and I yell up, Is that bell for blow jobs of breakfast? That's as far as it goes in this house, your trash mouth Frank. Gabby goes, nothing is loud enough that we can hear it three doors down,

three floors down like when your friend from Texas came over, he goes, Oh, well, well, maybe your boyfriend does you satisfy your the way I satisfy my girlfriend. And the floor is like, it's maximum. Frank, stop it. Stop it. I'm gonna have to talk on you this.

This, I'm gonna call you this. And Frank, he's like, this is disgusting. All right, this conversation is just gross to have this conversation in front of a mother, in front of a mother. And of her mother and Frank's like Ah, this is coming from the guy with the ball game in his room. All right Frank the ball gag was a joke. Okay, first of all when I bought it I thought it was a toy for Duwock all right, so first of all there's that and frankly my family Let me taste it My family is the most important thing to me. And I promise you guys, I will not

let my life take priority over your life. Now excuse me, I gotta go bang a chicken Texas, have a great lesson your family meeting. Bye. Yeah. And the worst is like, oh, by the way, we never even asked you why you're moving home. Frank. And he's like, what, what, what, what, what, what do I tell people? I'm, I'm just gonna die living on the shore, okay? I need my family, I'm old. Yeah, he's like ever since you started the renovations,

I'm like a gypsy. If anyone asked me where my home is, what do I say, my showhouse? I'm like, you get an apartment, Frank. Yeah. Like rent a place, that's what you say. then he goes that he tells us look, you know, it's temporary It's obviously not gonna be my homestead like Frank you were not you're not on the frontier You're not a pioneer. This is not your home. It's not referring to this Renault as your homestead in Jersey

Okay, he's making himself into Sarah Plain and tall or taxes Your homestead exemption don't forget So Dolores is probably like listen you can stay there, but it's not your homestead He's like listen, I'm on the record on television. This is not my homestead. All right. I'm so claiming the place in Jersey is my homestead Right Get those taxes done you guys. I don't forget there I'm like who uses the word

home stat like the IRS is like, we do. Yeah. So Frank's like, this is such a great opportunity or whatever. And then they start plugging Dolores about when she's coming back and she's like, you know what? I want to be alone. I want to chill. I want to walk from the kitchen, then up some stairs to the living room, then up some stairs to the bedroom, then I want to climb down the window so I can come in the front door to walk back into the kitchen and then up the stairs. I want to be where the people are not. I wish I knew the rest of lyrics. That's as far as I can go with that song parody. So, I really don't know anything after that lyric. So then, Frankie is like, listen, I'm just very thankful

to be living with you guys, you know, like. And so, he's like, oh, by the way, how's David, Ma? Well, you know what? Tell her, tell her, lay it out, lay it out. You know what, we can't have town to wash. We're hot a little more. I don't see a lot. He's been, you know, he's been asking to see me.

He's been spending time and we broke up. It's the end of the road for me and David. Okay, it's motorcycles only from this point on. All cars must stop. Fortunately, David's living room was the end of the road for the motorcycle, with the road should have actually been the end of the road for the motorcycle with a road should have actually been the end of the road, okay? I dumped it. This is what happened.

And Frankie Jr. is like, oh, this is horrible. Ma, it's horrible. Ma, you know what? It's horrible to hear that. It's just horrible. It's horrible to hear that. And Gabby's like, the why? But why?

I mean, where are these kids so, like, mostly attached to David out of it. I mean, I can sort of understand Frankie because Frankie worked for him, you know? But Dolores, you know what? The lack of communication. He didn't meet me halfway on a lot of things. He didn't even meet me a little bit.

He actually just never even met me. Like, there were a lot of times I would just go to the restaurant. He just wouldn't even meet me there. I would just be sitting there at the restaurant. It was the hardest thing to do. I just want halfway. All right, Gap. I would send a mental Uber to him. He wouldn't even get in the mental Uber. Okay. That affects my mental Uber rating. It's just this respectful is what it is. Sometimes I just sit and listen to that Kenny Log and song, meet me halfway, and then David just

turns it off. Like he just comes over just to turn it off. He's so upset about that. He wouldn't even order me half and half. All right, it was just milk. That's all he would get, you know. So come on, it doesn't got to be cream. But halfway, Frank. I never saw more angry than the time we drove by a halfway house.

He said those should be illegal. He actually did a U-turn in the middle of the street to get away from it. So ASPCA commercial, okay, so I'm worried about this show because the commercial that I saw for the whole thing, like the whole two minutes was the saddest ASPCA. ASPCA, ASPCA. AS-A-S-P-A-C-A-S-P-A-S-P-A-S-P-A-S-A-S-P-A-S-A-S-P-A-S-A-S-A-S-P-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A-S-A the pie again. It's like the creepiest pie adoption. I'm like the creepiest pie adopter ever. It's like, I don't know. I never adopted that pie. What are you talking about?

Why don't I? Keylon tripping down my face. Keylon, I'm criminal. That ASPCA commercial has been running on Bravo a lot. I saw it a lot. And you just hear Sarah McLaughlin's voice in the background being like, she's just sort of like, I don't remember how it starts, but I remember feeling like it was a tangent. Like she really, it was something like, pencils are good to write with, but what happens when you can't even write like these animals? And you're like, wait, you were talking about pencils. It is like that. It's like, imagine, imagine it being sunny outside, but you don't have a window like these

dogs. It is really sad. And obviously I'm not making fun of adopted dogs. I'm just really sad that Bravo doesn't have, like I need Bravo to have bigger commercials. You know, I want to hear even if it's a local, even if it's like a four is the best in Texas. Even that? I just I find it hard to pivot from going from the real housewives where we're making fun of just like terrible people and then all of a sudden we're meant to

be have sincere feelings about something. I'm like I don't I don't like that pivot. Just give me a commercial. I don't know. I don't know, tires. I don't know. The only thing rubber, I think it would work on it. Seen tires, some of the treads. Yeah. Ziplock bags. Yeah.

Something in the Tupperware. Yeah. Yeah. Bring back that thumb that you used to do with glad commercials, you know? Yeah, a little smiley face. Actual rubbers. The block might be good.

Rubber is for jersey. Rubber industry. Let's have a lot of how about a commercial to support the rubber industry. You know, yeah, a little smiley face actual rubbers. The block might be good for jerseys. Rubber industry. Let's have a lot of how about a commercial to support the rubber industry, just like, you know, do ponte. So now everybody is packing for Melissa's party at the show. I'm so drunk already. Yeah. So Margin Show we're packing and Margin's like, you know what?

I've got some green Terry cloth here. I think we should match. Yeah. We'll be like little matching talent. It's like, hey, J.W. you ready? He's like, oh God, Margin, I just broken my green polo. So then we see Bill's packing and Jennifer walks in with a dress just,

I got this outfit. It's pretty cute. It's like a little big army, but whatever. It'll just make me look a little skinny. I don't be like you're losing so much weight. And I'd be like, it's because of all the stress your bitches are putting me through. And Bill is just like, hmm. That's Bill the whole the whole scene just kind of perching their staring like, why am I here? just kind of perching their staring like, why am I here? Yeah.

I'm so upset about having to face everyone. I'll be there, face to face with Joe Gorgas, shirtless with his muscles glimmering in the sunshine and Evan has on his chest purking up. Ooh, it'll be terrible for me Jennifer. Mm. Then over at Jackie's, all the families, telling her, I'd send me Nisa cut his hair.

He's like, what if I just lick my hands and then put them down on my hand? You, I think you are so crazy. This isn't the end of the right now. I think. And then we go down to the showhouse. And most in Joe Gorgher, arrive and they're at the door and Gorgher's like,

eh, as soon as I get down here something happens to me horny I get very horny eeeh yeah I'm so horny it's a sure yeah and she's like listening to me don't get everyone drunk Joe okay I don't need people puking in my bathrooms he's like always me it's I'm always the bad guy I was like oh god now it's your fucking crucifixion boner. I wouldn't be surprised if he actually did have two decks just to make a cross. You know, like a good victim fuck in the Jersey Shore.

And then Dolores and Frank they show up at their house, their, their storehouse. And Frank is like, Hey, when was the last time it was just me and you Dolore and our two dogs, yeah, one of the last times because I don't know. God knows what you brought into this house, you and your orgies. Don't rule my weekend. All right. So then Jackie's coming with Evan. And she's like, I'm excited to go, but you know, it's so much about food. And I don't want to talk about that. she's like, I'm excited to go, but you know, it's so much about food and I don't want to talk about that. And I'm worried about my heart rate now. You know what really helps consistent worrying.

So I'm gonna do this all the way there. Ha ha ha ha ha. And then she goes, you know what? Joe Gorgas has, everybody has to have sex. Lucky you. And he goes, what do you mean? I thought it was a weird end to that scene. But I think he was saying like, no, like lucky you. And he goes, what do you mean? I thought was a weird end to that scene. But I think he was saying like, no, like lucky you.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, anyway, but one of the posts is broken and she's like, Frank, why is this post broken? And he's like, come on, you know, a girl was over, she kicked her walled. And boom, you break it. Come on, you mean to tell me in all the time that you and David was together, you never broke any furniture? And she's like, I mean, I broke a stool once when I threw it at the motorcycle in the living room,

but I was alone. How can I break furniture having sex with no one, Frank? All right. I was trying to have a sex life with an invisibility cloak. Okay. Also, don't bring up, David. Look how destroyed I am. Look, look at my face. I'm out of control.

I'm like a little... I don't want to cry. Look, I'm positively disheveled, Frank. Don't do this. You know, I don't listen. I tunnel out. I tunnel out when I, when I, to avoid the motion, you know, I tunnel out and he goes, well, I can't believe you're crying over David.

Okay, you didn't even cry over the voice. The voice. She goes, I cried. You just didn't see me crying. Look, here I am crying again out of control. You just didn't see me cry, Frank. Look, here I am crying again out of control. You just didn't see me cry Frank. You can't see tears when you had this covered

and barely legal vulva Frank from the shore. All right. Frank like he was so sensitive there, checking onto Laura's. After he left her when she just had his baby to go fuck Slut on the beach. Yeah, exactly. So, um, so we're learning like a just like more like the fun times are starting up and Everyone's gonna be coming to Melissa's tomorrow and this can be a beach day and a barbecue and Jennifer rented a show

I was around the black baby and Melissa is saying how she just like even though Margaret and Jenna made up she just doesn't trust Jen as far as she can throw her and then they put up that Social media post again. She called us quarks So that's their big fight that we're gonna get to later and so back to Jen and Bill He's only gonna be there for a couple of days. Well, obviously you have to work couple of days. Well obviously you have to work baby. It's like it's tree gonna be there. And she's like yeah of course we got a show house. And so then she starts going through all the gossip how she had some progress with Margaret but then Dolores just started yelling at her for not believing that

Jackie was her friend and she's like I don't like that it was a bull talk attack bill and then she yells she's the friend of mine. But all the proof shows otherwise. I love Jennifer to be a lawyer. I think the proof is in the pudding and the pudding's name is Delores. Um, so then Delores, then we go back to Delores. Has no problem turning against any ally. I mean, I will have to have your turning against Delores. Delores is stuck up for your stupid ass the whole time you've been here and you've been wrong on everything she's stuck up for you for.

Dolores has been like the most loyal friend to all of them and it's crazy how they're just like coming for her this season. So Dolores is saying, you know what? My loyalty was questioned the other day. Jack, he said to Jennifer, Dolores isn't really your friend and you know what else? She's saying, I just want Jennifer to know I care about her.

When we were leaving Treesis Pottie, you know what, we were all like, I feel bad for Bill. And she goes, I don't feel bad for him because he shouldn't have stuck his dick in someone else. Like, she didn't even say you shouldn't have done it. Say it, she said it, fucking nasty. She was right. What is wrong with you?

By the way, I know, and first of all, she didn't say I don't feel bad. She said, when you see the clip, she says, I just feel bad for Jennifer, you know, like, I feel more bad for Jennifer than I do for Bill. He should have been sticking to someone's, and regardless of the semantics of it, Jackie is totally correct.

I know, but this is so housewives to take something like that and turn it into something beautiful. So, yeah, Dolores is like housewives to take something like that and turn it into something horrible. So, you know, Dolores is like, Jackie wants to fuck with me. She's gonna see what Dolores from Paterson is like when she's devastated. And then Dolores goes to me, it was vulga.

Almost, I mean, not as vulga as Frank destroying this beautiful Ashley furniture bed frame, but pretty vulga. You were just talking about the ball gag that your son keeps in this room. So I know exactly. He's like, well, I had to run over to you, you know, because I hadn't seen that looking you eyes in a long time, all right? You're vulnerable right now. Shagom down, you hear me. She's like, oh my god, yes. Little windshield wipers come out on her

eyes. Little built in windshield. I've known him so long. My body has just has just built its own little windshield wipers. Dolores is also mad about Jackie because Jackie just even not even first she's saying that she's mad at Jackie because she felt like she Jackie could have said like I don't agree, but that she feels like Jackie went because she felt like she Jackie could have said like I don't agree But that she feels like Jackie went in on bill and she goes I mean, you're still talking about the husband Who she stayed with? Who she loves I'm like no Dolores. Okay, you are wrong in this one Dolores because yeah She stayed with him and she made love him

But that doesn't mean that Bill gets a free pass for doing what he did. Excuse me. No. I know. And it's weird coming from Dolores because I know a lot of its projection, right? Like she still loves, I mean, I don't mean love love, but she still loves Frank who did that to her, you know, who totally fucked her over and actually left with the girls, you know, so maybe it's kind of projection. I think it is, but you're right.

Also, why does Dolores get to come on for years and be like, I love Frank, but he's a kind of projection. I think it is, but you're right. Also, why does Dolores get to come on for years and be like, I love Frank, but he's a piece of shit. He fucked everything. No, no, no, no, no, no, what he did to me, you know, she gets to do that. And Jen isn't even the one doing it. And also, yeah, it's to be right. And Jackie, I feel worse for the woman than the man

who was sticking his dick and something else. Yeah, Jackie was not going around being like, he's a piece of shit worthless human being. It's just like, I feel worse for Jen than for Bill. Yeah, Jackie was not going around being like he's a piece of show worthless human beings, just like I feel worse for Jen than for Bill. Yeah. So then, um, Martin Joe arrived to pick up Jack, Jackie and Evan for this trip. And Martin's like, Joe, I'm gonna show my coach, could be the show. That's for you, John. So they start gossiping while over at Mel's Shore House. She's, uh, Joe's like, I'm gonna get everyone, I'm gonna take all this water. You know, the only filtered water probably that we got in this house. I'm gonna pour it out and then I'm gonna refill it with vodka.

That's great. So then Tracy arrives, America's sweetheart Tracy. And she's like, oh my god, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. Oh my god. I'm always like, welcome to Missy G's. Hey, I thought it was Joey. Geez. Now the women rolled the rule the ruse to get down to the Jersey shore. Tracy, Joey, geez. I'm always the bad guy. I'm raining more. I'm always the bang. Hey, where's my man? Oh, Tiki's still at home. He said something about two embarrassed to show his face and my presence anymore. I don't know. I think he was joking around. Yeah, he's at work. He's still got to work. Good for him. And then

of course, Joe's like, man, you must spend some money, right? Women, am I right? Women. Hey, the best way to keep abroad is to make sure the broad is keeping you from being bankrupt. A marriage. So Tracy goes along to a party and is handed a glass by a man and goes, ooh, wait a minute, that's not water. That can only happen in 2022 in New Jersey, okay? Yeah. Anywhere else Joe would be in trouble right now.

Thanks. Yeah, he basically pranks her by pouring her glass of water from the, from the, the sparklets thing, but it has the vodka in it. So she's like, oh my god, glad I didn't take a big swallow. First time I've said that in a long time. Who puts vodka in their thing? let I didn't take a big swallow. First time I've said that in a long time. Who puts vodka in their thing? Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. So then in the other car, Evan's like, hey, is Tiki coming?

You know, it's all the husband's care about. They're like, is Tiki coming on this thing? And Evan's like, you know, Tiki and Louis and Louis, they're both good additions. And Marchus, I mean, okay, that's not exaggerating. I'm kind of happy. I thought that was, that makes so much more sense. They're really good additions.

I thought, I thought Evan was saying, you know, Tiki and Louis, they're really good additions. I was like, oh, yeah, I mean, that's good to have it a week for a weekend. They have like two people who love doing dishes. That makes my thing even better. That makes me think these good additions, because I've seen them iron.

And I didn't trust his ironing either. His ironing was like, remember, I was like, please don't talk to me. So much. As long as Tracy's there, he'll be doing that. He'll be cleaning that one dish for a very long time. It's like she's still talking.

Okay, that dish will be sparkling because he'll be just not willing to put it down and talk with her. Yeah, so much is like, I mean, let's not exaggerate. Okay, you know what? I'm one likely we, I really do, but the jury's out. Let's not forget, let's not forget, you know, the video. And then it came out on social media again today.

People say this, fam, I don't like him. And then we see the post, this is on Bravo and Cocktails underscore, great account. Love you Bravo and Cock cocktails, follow ya. A non-please, then a bunch of blurred out. But I know a family member of his and he is in all caps bad news. Like a lip sees, it's really terrible.

I can't get into the details. I don't know if I believe that you know this cast because you're using proper olypsies, there's three dots. And you knew how to say it's properly. And usually on Jersey posts, that doesn't happen. And you know, I actually, I believe this blind item, but I also believe that this is the most generic blind item of all time. Like this is the, this is, this is like the gossip.

His own family members don't like him. What a horrible dude. Tree really knows how to pick them and people in her close circle have been warned of him. So like basically it's like, here's the blind item. Louis, Louis on family doesn't like him. I'm like, I think I need a little bit more than that. Because like really anyone could say that. Like I could literally write to any like get onto a finster and write to anyone, be like, you know what I heard? You know what I heard about Jackie Goldschneider? She doesn't have human legs. Yeah, donkey legs.

Just put it out there. Yeah, you can say whatever you want, I guess. But I don't doubt it, especially because he's acting just so fishy about everything, you know? Like I get that the guy's being naturally humiliated, like publicly humiliated right now. But he's also acting really fishy, which we'll get to at the end.

So Jack, he's like, you know, I wonder what tree's gonna be like when we're all together. Oh, you know, but she's just gonna do what she did at the last party. Keep saying she's going inside to watch her hands. Winner the meantime, she's in there doing damage control for this guy,

you know, and she's just gonna shut it down. That's what she's gonna do's just going to shut it down. That's what she's going to do. She's going to shut it down. Yeah, which is actually exactly what she's going to do and what she does do. So then, now Jennifer's family arrives at their rental, their Jersey Shore rental, which is like, did you notice there was like some sort of like the stork etching or some sort of waiting bird that was etching to the glass in the front door. I was like, I'm sure that's actually what Soul Jennifer on this property.

She's like, oh god, look, they got a bird on the door, baby. Like I get it, really get this house. Hey, we've got two back doors and the front door with the bear, man. Is that a stock? I love a stock, sold. So then, so they're loading in and then Gorgia meanwhile is making gross commentary about sausages that you might own Italian sausage. She's like you always gotta go down that road Joe.

Like yeah of course I do. Yeah because there is no weather road. So then March and Jackie arrive and Melissa's already doing her her squealing thing she think. I'm such drunk already. Yeah, and you make those declarations of I'm such a fun drunk. I'm such a fun drunk. Really trying to sell her like funness on us. And then Joe's like, hey, Mod, much, much, much, much, much, drink this, drink this, is water, is water, drink it, much, much, much.

Hey guys, she's gonna drink it, she's gonna drink the water, she's gonna drink the water, my drink it, she's like, this isn't, this isn't water, he's like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, Marker who doesn't drink, he's like, ah, it's a good one. I'm joking, you know, but I mean, while it's like the one, he's like the Diane Donbolo deck who just has to bring in all the luggage.

You just catch him just bringing bag after a bag. I don't know how they got all those bags in the back of Evans Audi. But Joe, he is the one bringing them all in. So as if Jen's kid is psychic, he goes, mom, I need to cut the pile up a baby. And then Teresa walks in. He's like, hey, don't hear about finding up on it makes you feel the change and it's good. I'm still sweet. So then she's like, yeah, the wheeze gonna come over later. I mean, because he went home, he got three dogs, you know, And I'm gonna mud on, I make them my weekends. Oh my God, I don't mind, I don't lose.

And the daughters, my daughters, and the love and the God and the poor guy, they're all staying at the house. So, by any way, she's staying at Jen's house this weekend. Yeah, so it goes to that side and Jen's like, I sit out here in the morning, spare me. And Teresa's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's real nice. That's a boat that they put trash on. Look at that. Look at that. Just a barge. It's like last year when they went on a boat ride.

The opening credits went to Laura. So just like on a boat, like being all glamorous. And there's like giant industrial facilities in the background. So Teresa is saying like, yeah, Boston was exhausting. I mean, but we came and he didn't have to do that. Like he came with me and that was nice. And we got in the joint room. And so we got all three of me at the end and Louis, we can watch movies and bad.

And she will like no It was a really good movie, but it was a little hard to follow was called Paw Patrol. It was really good. I like it a lot So Jen updates her on the party. She's like Jackie was nice to me and treats is like Bass man, so Jackie's being nice too. She's all mad, the now-jump's gonna be friends with Jackie. And she goes, And Jackie told me if it's the lawist isn't being a supporter fan tonight. And then after talking to Margaret, I actually think that what she did do is not so wrong either.

That's what the lawist said. And so, she's just like, Wow. And she goes, yeah, then Jackie came over. And I went left. I don't know, somehow I went left. It's almost like someone threw Jackie under the bus. I don't know who would do that, baby.

Papsun Delois came out. Ah, ma, ma, ma. And Delois is mad at me for listening to Jackie. But, like, how are you really loyal when you don't see where my ship was wrong? I just had to spend. Truby, so the whole time is just looking at her phone, like. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. She's barely paying attention. Truby's the whole time is just looking at her phone like She's barely paying attention. She's like Looking up the plot description for pop patrol. Oh, can you now I get it now I get it So Trees is like listen, we're gonna call it a bitch, but then you know why I'm here at this house instead of my own house So we should do the barbecue that I was planning here. You know my name I'm like well springing so we should do the barbecue that I was planning. Yeah, you know mine right? Like, well, springing a last minute barbecue for, you know, 15 people and the crew. Sure. But this is probably, by the way, this is clearly this had to have this must have been

Louis' work, right? Because since when has Teresa, when has Teresa's family ever gotten the way of shooting, right? Because since when has Teresa, when has Teresa's family ever gotten the way of shooting, right? She, like, she'll push all her kids and like their babysitter and like the Uber that they arrived and she'll push them all into frame if she needs to, you know, but suddenly she can't film it or ask that too many people there. I think this is Louis. I think Louis was like, you can just really scared, right? A hundred percent and Louis has been sitting, and she's been sitting there on her phone the whole time,

which is also not really like her. You know, it's like she's getting orders from Louis. Yeah. While she's sitting there supposed to be shooting a scene, hey, Louis, how about you don't come to the shore? How about you stay the fuck home instead of making this entire episode about your fucking drama that you refuse to engage in? Yeah, I guarantee that he probably is saying little things to her.

Like, you know, it just feels like he'll be a lot having cameras there at the house. I mean, oh, oh, God, Shrieb, did I forgot to tell you that I invited everyone to our house this weekend? Maybe we shouldn't film there. I don't know. It seems like a lot. You know, he probably saying those things. She's like, yeah, seem like a lot of dead. Well, that's one of the, that's one of the traits that they always say. I've learned this from lifetime movies about people who you think maybe or there are rumors to be allegedly, allegedly abusive in some way, is separation from everyone you know and everything that's important to you.

You know, that's exactly right. Everything that's important to Teresa is this TV show. Right. I see the separation starting to happen, sir. Yep. So now over at Melissa's house, so Evans bringing bags upstairs. Guys, in case you're wondering what happened to those bags

and what Evans relationship were to them, he brought them upstairs. And then Joe, Joe Pignino pulls Jackie onto a bed. He's like, wait, wait, wait, wait. I never been on a bed with another woman in 10 years. Ah, so it's like fun and the game still happening. You know, you need to cut this crap out, okay? It's kind of cute when it's like, wow, I think Dolores is hot,

but now you're just like, skeven on people's wives, okay? Yeah, and you're already... There's a line... And I have a... And you do have a trifreck root of cheating on your wife, so maybe like, you know, just be aware of optics, just a little bit. Just a line, Benino. A line, Benino. I mean, just be aware of optics. Just a little bit. Align Benino.

Align Benino. I mean, just stay in the C-Phone. Come on, Joe. You know what I'm gonna wear? I think I'm gonna wear my cast-amp. So Joe follows Melissa, and this has Benino. He's following Melissa. Melissa's like, what?

You're like my ass. You know what I'm about to see your wife. Tch-ting-ting-ting-ting-ting-ting-ting. He's like, what? You've seen it a million times already So she opens the door and sees March naked and she's like And then downstairs evident Joe Gorgah are doing shots and Melissa comes down She's like Joe I walked into Margaret's bathroom bedroom. She was fully naked. I'm like yeah, that will

Probably happen if you walk in on someone's change. She's talking as if Margaret were walking down the Jersey Shore completely naked. Like, it's a very normal thing for someone to be naked when they declare that they're changing into a captain. Um, so they're laughing in the kitchen because they're gathering to go to the beach. And Jack, he's like, have you already been feeding Evan this vodka? Because he's already sticking to sick up my back and they leave. And then Jen and Tree leave their place as a garbage truck passes.

I was like, wow. I'll tell you what, Jersey really does clean up its trash. Got a lot of trash clean up. Well, yeah, those, I mean, those trash companies, there's a whole, I mean, trash companies in Jersey, that's a whole other issue. So those completely legitimate trash pick up, come on by, upstanding family businesses. So, that trash gets taken out, don't you worry.

So, Jan, everyone's going to the beach. And Frank, oh, there's a lot of people on the beach. There's so many people on the beach. Remember when I used to work out on the beach, remember that's the worst, the worst. So, to Laura Teresa's like yeah I'm saying I hear my 20s and Dolores tells us oh yeah Teresa was a fist pumpian and a partian in doing it all all right seems like yesterday but I was the daughter of a cop so I was very I was laying out, but I did have a lot of fun. Okay, when did you buy it through the girls' mittens

in so deep that it got her nails? The mittens. There was never a established if there were mittens in the story, okay? But I believe that there were actually wear mittens. Let's be honest, it probably happened in January. I know I like that. The Laura's painting herself

as the Goody Tushouchy daughter of the cop. Also, we haven't mentioned that like every five minutes on this episode, they just showed another vintage photo of Dolores from like a low angle. It's like, he has a photo of me on a merry-go-round, not happy about it from a low angle. Yeah, any picture they show Dolores from any time you don't want to fuck with Dolores. I'm not sure. Dolores turn the wrap in the picture before you go on the water slide. And she's like,

it's like a million photos of her like, here I am. About to take my final exam. Every picture says, what are you going to do about it? Really? This is when he tends to decide to take a photo, mom. Yeah. So she checks in with Jennifer. She's like, Jen, how you feeling today? You got a little upset the other day, but that's fine.

That's normal. And she's like, oh, so now I have a ride to be upset, Laura. We're thank you for acknowledging to Laura, so that it's actually normal to be upset when the whole world is found out your husband is cheated on you. Normal humans have feelings, baby. Thanks to Lawrence.

Gosh, listen, I mean, Jennifer here she is asking for some more support from from Dolores. Dolores is like, got the note, here I am, checking in on you, supporting you, and the first thing Jennifer does is just like shit on it. It's like, why is she surprised that people don't want to support her? And she also takes things the wrong way every time, because she's taking it as Dolores giving her permissions to have feelings.

No, Dolores was saying, you were a fucking bitch to me the other day at that party, but you know, I know that you were in a place, so that's okay. I'm gonna let it pass today, and not drown your ass in the fucking ocean that we're at right now. Okay. So then Joe Gorgas shows up. He's like, what's up my man? Little another variation on various, various, and Melissa's like, oh my god, I've been drinking since 10 a.m.

Who wants to be fondled right now. Fun Tom Melissa. She's so annoying. Oh, so then let's see Teresa's like, oh, oh yeah, gong, gong, gong, gong, gong. All right, so there's a change of plans because we're still having that barbecue, but now we're going to have it at Jen's house because I got a house full of children, a pain in the room. You know, we're still doing the barbecue. We're just going to switch the dress.

It kind of keeps talking. And it's really uncomfortable. And the clown music is even playing, right? And everyone's just looking at her like, why are you going on this much about changing the address of a party? No one cares about. We've also dedicated, I know that I personally have dedicated a lot of real estate in my notes document to like the logistics of this barbecue

That is moved from one place to another. I'm like, why are we getting so much screen time about this? Why why there's so much discussion? They're just going to a barbecue also Ronnie I just noticed something When Melissa said that she's like I've been drinking who wants to be fondled right now Tracy then set replies and goes, well, you know, after a couple of drinks, Melissa gets a little bit more fondling and de lores, source goes, yeah, she's come close to finger banging me.

And I'm like, who's, I love that de lores, it's like happy to be like, yeah, she likes to finger bang me. Oh my God, Jackie, you're so vulgar. Listen to me, Jackie's vulgarity coming out of Jackie's mouth. The vulgarity. So the guys are cheering and Joe's like, you know, he is to Louis and my sister.

You know, I just want him to be good to her. And you know, the internet thing, I took it off to that thing like 10 times. Who else? Who else? Hey, the Lord! Deloitte! See him back up a second. Stand back up.

Yeah, I just wanted to look at your side, Boob. Okay, he's back down again. So Joe's talking about how after the keg party when Margaret said that Deloitte had slept with Joe before, he woke up that night and Mel was standing over him like the exorcist. Like, did you have sex with Margaret? And his answer was, are you still on that? Still no answer.

Still no answer. So they're talking about Louis and everything. Teresa is and Melissa. No, Teresa goes for the girls are now gossiping right. So Tracy's like, so is Bill coming and Melissa's like, no, no, you know, who cares. So Marjor's like, listen, you know what, Teresa seems happy. Okay, she seems happy, right? And Melissa's like, yeah, but, you know, you guys will agree, like we hear stuff, but I mean, the guy's very charming in person, right? Mm-hmm. And Marjor's like, what, he is charming and he's good looking.

But some is a cosse, husband. I have to disagree with Marge there. I've had a lot of car salesmen, not charming or good looking. Yeah, that's actually true. I don't think I've ever had a good looking or charm. Maybe charming, but never good looking. Sorry. I would say more forceful. Like, oh, you don't want it totally understanding. Just signing this, you're signing this, right?

Okay, I'll just be over here where you sign that. Okay, I'll just be over here, right? And by the end, I'm like, why am I driving a tiny little fiat that I don't even fit into? So then JoB is also talking about Louie over with the guy. I think, you know, there's so much crap coming out about him. Sometimes think there's so much crap coming out about him.

Sometimes when there's so much smoke, there's gotta be a fire, am I right guys? So, Marge is like, it's upsetting. Again, it's upsetting. So why don't you just address it, right, in my right? Am I right? So then the food is delivered and they start eating. And to Laura's is says, look, I just

want to relax, ladies. It's the first time I've been in the show since wait for it because I'm devastated. Since David and I broke up. It's my first time. Now admittedly, David and I never actually went to the show together, but you know, I always thought David and I were a sure thing. So just to go something, someplace near that word, it's very difficult for me. So Trees still staring at her phone texting, you know, doing something. And um, Delic Teresa,

did you hear me? I broke up with David. Just, why, why, why didn't you text it? It mean well, because it wasn't easy for me to even talk about it. I mean, and the other thing is, you know, I'm taking it very bad, horrible. In fact, look at me. I'm a viscerated. Can you see the tears coming down my cheeks? I can barely even get the words out of my mouth. We're tip to break up with them before the party because to reach the cheaply what the Jackie and I know you've got a

temper to Laura's but that was a lie. To Jennifer totally removing herself as an instigating agent from that, like just make it to like to Laura's just lost her mind out of nowhere. The jurors like Jennifer, I'm sorry you were hurt, but you know what really got me. Why is Jackie coming all of a sudden become being a friend with you when you're fighting with her friends? Sorry, this is just the emotion

Course and through me right now. I apologize if I rose my rose my voice there to me this whole thing has just been cruelty and and to loris is like well you want to know one thing your friend over there this you want to know what she said when we left the pool party she said i don't care he shouldn't stuck his dick and somebody else she does the same little imitation of jackie yeah and you know it i don't believe that gen even thinks that that was so bad but she she understands that this is a moment where she's allowed to be mad at someone so she's just Jackie this is a friend this is a friend and she's You just call someone's mother a slut like last year

Yeah call someone's mother a slut like last year. Yeah. Jennifer, can you hear me through this wall of emotion that is consuming me right now? If you can, blink twice. Okay. Jennifer, she's fucking playing you. Don't be a pussy about this. God, I hate the vulgarity of Jackie. God, I can't stand it so much. Fucking pussy.

It's just fucking gross. So now we've got this huge fight about to happen over literally nothing like the dumbest thing. And so Jen's like, she said that, wow, saying that about someone's husband who actually did happen affair, discussing. She has to specify that because she's separating it from the rumor. Like she's going with the whole Teresa,

this is way worse, because it actually did happen it wasn't just a rumor. Right, but also like Jackie was literally defending you like she was literally saying we should care we should be supporting Jennifer Moore right. So then Jen goes who else heard it who else heard it was there a pizza bagel involved. It's all a blur to me. Like I said, I'm consumed with emotion and sorrow. I just want you to think about it when she wanted to be your friend, all right? Was it before she said that? Was she after, was it after she said that?

I just want you to open your eyes a little bit, okay? Well, first of all, it was before they made up officially and became friends just because you're pretending that you actually care. And why are you always standing up for the cheating asshole of a husband? Every single time. For every time.

So now they're having this whole conversation and Theresa's like, oh, will we just texted? There's so much traffic. Like, thanks for the update. Thanks for the update. Thanks for the traffic on the tens. Well, it's just Teresa just spouting out lies that nobody's even asking her about. Hey, traffic, traffic, Louie, Louie, tax them.

So then Joe's like, hey, I texted Louie. And he said, I just drove down. There's so much work. What's up with that, guys? What's up with that? Why? What's up with that? Why is everybody asking you about? Who cares? Leave.

That's all Joe Gorka talks about. I know. So now they all go home, go to their respective homes, and Dolores is back. I said, oh my god, it's so hot out there, I was getting a headache, a headache from crying too hard. Am I right? And then we go to Melissa's house

and joke workers like, who wants an espresso? Anyone want an espresso and espresso anyone? Marge like listen, okay, you know what? I got a shower, I got to do my makeup, I got to make a duty and I got to have iced coffee in that water, okay. So, Jenna tree. So, tree says like, the chaff is going to be here. So then, Jenna's just basically's like the chaff is coming in here So then Jen's just basically going through the house checking all the kids It's in that Teresa goes to get ready when the chefs come and then Louis calls tree Okay, so Louis Teresa goes upstairs whenever you see someone go into a room and shut the door and the camera doesn't immediately cut You know it's gonna be good. So she shuts the door and we just hear,

how far are you? And he's like, I just wanna get outta here. I'm just wanna get outta here. It's like, why? Wait, wait, wait, I mean, I might, all right? He's like, take it off. Take it off. So she takes off her mic and then Melissa gets a text

and she's like, oh my God. Okay, everyone, report from fun, Melissa. Teresa just texted me and was like, don't say a word, make sure you do the right thing, back up my boyfriend. Don't wait, guess what? You know what that means? She's gonna freak out. Yes, exactly. Also, I haven't had my little duty yet, so excuse me, I gotta go. Bye. I love that Melissa is just reading that to the whole cast. Excuse me, I gotta go. Bye. I love that Melissa's just reading that to the whole cast. Don't say a word, she reads to everyone. Yeah, so then we see the cameraman who have obvious,

the cameraman who's obviously been told to get the fuck out of the room by Teresa, right? Is instead on the second floor putting the camera down. So we're watching this through the, you know, breaks in the stairwell or whatever. So a lady is telling Teresa, she's like, listen to Teresa, we just want to talk. Like, what happened with Lowe? Well, we just, you know, what we want to talk about it because we met him in the parking lot.

And he's pretty upset. He's like, did you, did he talk to you about it at all? Like, I think he feels like everyone's talking about him. And he wants to know why. And she's like, well, I told him not to come if he feels like that. And then Theresa tells him to give us this bullshit. You know, Louis didn't sign up to be antagonized and you know, or questioned or anything like, I'm in the public eye, not Louis.

No, yeah, actually, yes, you are in the public eye and you've been in the public eye for like 10 years. And Louis knew what he was signing up for. Yes, you are in the public eye and you've been in the public eye for like 10 years and Louis new What he was signing up for and he can't have it both ways. He cannot court Louis literally signed up for the on TV okay, and then I'm not expect to have you seen Literally signed papers to do this okay, he had to sign the papers to do this He literally signed up. And she's like, I'm leaving. I swear to God, you guys is the devil.

And somehow she's yelling at production, really for no reason. They haven't done anything except say that Louis won't come in. Right. And then she starts saying this bullshit. She's like, you don't get none happy for us. They want to sabotage us.

Which is like, I mean, this could be Jackson, Brittany, this could be any number of these codependent relationships. And Prisha's like, well, where are you going? She's like, I'm leaving. Why, why they still filming? And why, she's like yelling at them to turn the cameras down. Yeah, I said, why are you still filming?

Go fuck yourself, I'm serious. And then dramatic music, as she drives off in her rose gold rangevert that she would only have from being on this show. So, yeah. Teresa. Teresa. Now, Louis, 100% signed up for this.

We know this because they had that whole ostentatious arrive like when Louis arrived with his flowers and everything and sending the, everything he does, he's like very much aware that he's on the show, but I think he thought he control his narrative and he can't and he's losing his mind. Soory. Yeah, he wanted to, you know, come on and be the charming,

the charming, new leading man. And unfortunately, you've got a lot of stuff about you out there. Yep. Can't stop it, right? You just can't stop the beat. Right, the music. I have to stop the music. Everybody, thank you so much for coming to us.

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