Watch What Crappens - #1823 RHOBH: Homeless Not Couthless

Episode Date: August 12, 2022

Dorit and PK have the ladies over for a charity dinner and Rinna loses her shit and starts screaming about old issues she forgot she resolved last week. Thankfully, Melissa Ehteridge is there to remind Diana what real singing sounds like after we are subjected to another concert by Chip. Find all of our premium bonuses and video recaps at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. I have cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cr Well, hello, and welcome to Watch What Cramping! Some podcasts for all that crap. We love to talk about our new old brawbs.

I'm Ronnie. Hi everybody. Welcome Ben. Welcome Ben. Hi, how are you? I'm broadcasting from an angelic cloud today. You sure are. I started with De Heaven.

Who's that Melissa Etheridge performance that justtheridge performance? It just sent you there. It sent me right there. I said, Oh, do my way. God, have a second, Rekola, Melissa Atheridge. Jesus Christ, stop breathing out. What do you smoke in tailpipes of cars? Is that the instruction?

Shoot put some postmates. Come to my window. Just get some liberators to the window. I'll be home soon. That's the lyric, right? Come to my window just gets all of her windows to the window. I'll be home soon. That's a lyric right come to my window. I'll be home soon. What the fuck? I'm so glad to be a driveway. You did the driveway. You're about to come home. I just watched the video. Like what if somebody's at my house and they're just like somebody's at your window, you know. Yeah. Exactly. I'll be home soon. How about you fucking open the door for me and stop being ashamed of me, Melissa, et cetera?

Yeah, how about you invite me and like a human being, okay? Come to my window. What are you talking to a squirrel? Come on now. Which my homeless a toothless, what is it, bridge? That everybody welcome. This is a crap and it's on demand day.

So we're on video. So if you want those videos see these gorgeous faces Just go to patreon.com slash watch what crap ends. That's also where you'll find our videos. I mean our bonus episodes this week We're gonna be doing either a trailer park But a trailer recap of girls girlfriends girlfriends, and girls, friends. It's real girlfriends. It's not just girlfriends. They're real girlfriends in Paris.

Oh, gotta get that branding. Yeah, real girlfriends of Paris. In Paris. Whatever, I really don't care. OK, I haven't even made it through this opening. I don't even gonna make it through that trailer. But we might be doing that. Or we might be doing Teresa's wedding video. We haven't decided yet. It's whatever we

can download more easily, but that'll be it tomorrow. Thank you for being here, and thank you for joining us on Take a Seat. That's our live Spotify show on Mondays. That's gotten really busy. It's been great. Yeah, we have a lot of people. We had like 800 people or something like that the other night. Yeah, 900. Oh. So thanks for coming. That's every Monday night, 7 p.m. Pacific, 10 p.m. Eastern. Oh, we'll be there this week again. And now we had one last thing, a very important reminder for people who did not hear it earlier in the week. This Monday marks the grand return of winter's crappening. It's our Game of Thrones podcast. You can catch the new episodes here on the Crapens feed,

or there's a separate Winters Crapening feed that you can just subscribe to. It's gonna be the same content, whatever's easiest for you. And we are covering the new HBO Max series slash spin-off, House of the Dragon. So we're gonna start with a trailer preview as our first episode next week.

And then the week after that is the premiere. So get yourself excited for all of that. Yeah, and those of you who are like, this isn't Bravo, we know it's not Bravo, okay? But it's all blonde people. So just pretend it's Orange fucking County, okay? Just as vapid for crying out loud. Yeah.

So today is real housewives of Beverly Hills. What an episode. Wow, what a car crash of an episode. Wow. Wow. This episode of everything. Melissa Atheridge, crazy charity. Just those two things.

That was enough ashore singing a song. After Lisa Rina just going off literally for no reason. just those two things. That was enough. Ash are singing a song. Everything. After Lisa Rina just going off literally for no reason. I mean, grasping, it's just grasping a straws at this point, Lisa Rina. So when it said Lisa Rina, you have to come to work at some point in the season or you're going to get fired. You have to do something. And she's like, okay, I'll just yell about something. Bitch.

I was like, okay, well, Lisa, you have to have something to yell about. Okay. Yeah. Oh, it also had Kathy Hilton. I was like, okay, well, at least you have to have something to yell about, okay? Yeah, it also had Kathy Hilton, and by the way, did you see that clip of Kathy Hilton on Water Happens Live afterwards? I did not, but I sure heard about it. For those of you who missed it, there was like a game where it was like Andy would put up a famous person on the screen as like, Kathy, do you know that this person is? So you put up a picture of Lizzo and Kathy goes,

um, precious. And everyone in the studio just like, a lot, everyone was just like covering their eyes and she's like, what? No, that's what I call her. I say that she's precious. I say she's a precious person. Right, Kathy, right.

Yeah, what an idiot. Kathy, Dumbie, listen. You're about two weeks away from your story of like Kathy Hilton's Erase's homo fobe. And this is how you enter. You're just building up that goodwill. You fucking idiot. She can't be racist. She learned about race from Michael Jackson.

She can't be racist, Roddy. So I don't know what you're talking about. I have never really felt a need to stand up for Kathy Hilton And I'm certainly not gonna start now dumb move lady. I mean Jesus Christ like they're a plenty of older people who might not know But just say I don't know you're really gonna go with precious like the first And also, like, also precious is like a good 11 or 12 years from now. So she just hasn't really updated her reference. Like how many people has she called precious over the past 10 years? I don't know.

Oh my God. Oh, hilarious. Here we are with this episode. Lots more cringes coming your way. That was just the apratif. That was just the cringes apotif that was just the cringe apotif everybody yes so let's just start right up first of all we ended off with kind of a cliffhanger last week at least or in us where she's

like you how dare you do this to Harry and then it ended like it was going to continue but it didn't continue no and instead we have to watch P.K. get dental work. I mean, Jesus Christ, they need to put a TVMA up there. I mean, if you have to put a TVMA up there for somebody smoking in an episode, I need a full paragraph of TVMA for having to watch this pasting

Motherfucker get his nasty teeth done. Okay. And of course, the MA stands for Matisse. So I, you know, I'm sure we had to watch this because as part of PK getting, I'm assuming free, you know, veneers or whatever free tea. Yeah, you know, he ain't paying for that shit. Yeah, it's just like he had to put on this doctor on TV and like, you know, they agreed to this right before the pandemic.

I'm assuming. And now it's like finally, the, the, is it the Pied Piper's come to pit? No, is, you know, whatever the Piper's come to pay is, whatever it is. I'm believing anytime I can't fit into sentence, I'm just gonna say, I had COVID, guys, I had COVID. So we're at doctor, just so he gets his full money's worth. We're with Dr. Sam Salay or some, yeah, Dr. Sam. These are such Beverly Hills secretary. So PK and to eat walk in and the secretary is like, oh my god. Hi. So good to see you.

So good. I love your dress. I love your hair. I love your skin. Oh my god. That second chin is looking amazing, PK. You know what you get where I come from? You're late. I'm on time. Really? If you're on time, then you're five minutes late where I come from. Sit down, the doctor will be here when he can.

That's a real sassy dental office, Ronnie. Real sassy, they at least have any of that, any of that like those ridiculous like, like toothy cheer you up posters around, because you know every dentist's office always, there's like some tooth that's happy, that's like, what a great day to get your teeth cleaned. I'm like, you know what, shut up. Fake tooth, cartoon tooth, okay.

Actually, my Texas dentist is very mad. They do have a lady in the front who's like, hi, like she's too much, you know, she's like, how are you? I'm like, you do not care. Stop pretending to be here. But the ones I had in Hollywood, they were real bitchy. And the lady who actually did the teeth cleaning

was named Princess, and she'll kick your ass. Okay. Okay. The person placed, I loved them. They didn't fuck her. Okay, anyway, secretaries. So then, he, K, looks right into the camera, and he's like, I'm looking forward to get him teeth done.

Can't wait babe. It's like he's pulling all of us babe. Well, you do realize you won't be able to talk for 10 minutes, pick here. Batten you, me with the talking stick. That's normal life for me babe.. Get it? They're like it. So, um, yeah, so then see, a PK got a teeth done two years ago. And then to read, you know, she couldn't now be the one with the shitty teeth in the relationship, even though her teeth looked more or less fine in the before picture. so she got her teeth done too, and she reminds us that you're not a real couple unless you get your teeth done together. Oh, look at that toothbrush.

It brushes the top teeth and the bottom teeth. How chic. That is the most chic toothbrush I've ever seen. You're not a real couple until you've avoided multiple bankruptcies together. Anthelaw, Anthobelagio. I mean, you can say what you want about these two, but they are a good couple. So the dentist comes in like the secretaries.

He's like, ah, you guys are aging and run first. Wow, the teeth must have really spirited that aging campaign, right? Dr. Sam Salih. And PK is like, actually, shit's gone down since I got these teeth. I haven't been Asian, but DUI. I mean, these teeth don't appear to be that lucky. Now there's a shortage on salt and vinegar potato chips. I don't know. It's like a X-Nay on the on the bad press a on teeth PK. These are for free. Okay. You say thank you. These teeth have changed the world.

Right. The Bellagio threatening to break my knee caps unless I pay them back. How could it get worse? Oh, we're about to see. We're about to see pictures of your teeth. You're before pictures. So Doreet's like, oh, and also I love that PK is openly admitting to getting a DUI while Dorita is trying to pretend like, oh, well, he blew drunk. But then by the time they got to the, he wasn't drunk. So he didn't get to DUI. He got to driving under the influence of just wanting a little Wendy's drive through from the. You are high. T J. W. That's all! Trapping under the end of the episode is just one of the little wet Wendy's. So she's like, well I'm not happy if he didn't tell me about getting taken in by the police,

but it doesn't make me lose all trust in him. If he makes another mistake, I won't be so easy on him, because the police were hard enough on him. They only let him get two shakes into burger at the shake shack on the way out. They refuse to stop again for a happy meal. He hasn't been happy since. I mean, Blue Lives Matter will say that to the sobbing, hairless lump of flesh, leaving tear stains on his pillow every night. What about his life? So then he gets like trying to talk during his cleaning. It's like triangles of cheese coming out.

Is that a happy meal toy? Trying to get through the tape? Is that a hot wheels that just got through? Wow. Hey, they say it was a happy meal. They didn't say what part you don't eat. So, Doctor, Doctor Celigi, I'm doing this charity. It's called Homeless, not Toothless. The funny part is, the Homeless they help are Toothless. It's not just to charity. It's

a riddle. It's for people that couldn't afford getting their teeth cleaned, you know, because they're homeless, but now they can get their teeth cleaned, but still stay homeless. So PK and I are putting on a little event called, this is what a home looks like homeless person, now here's a smile. I need to think it's just such a negative name for a cheerity, nothing, you know. But I suggest there's something more positive like, maybe I don't have a home, but I've got gums or houses for the toothless. You know, we couldn't afford an actual house for every toothless person in Los Angeles, but we could just make gingerbread homes for them. Gingerbread homes for the toothless. We could

give everyone a pint of milk to wash them down. We were trying to get Brad Pitt on the board and we were gonna rename it, what's in the box? Teeth, but unfortunately, he wouldn't come up because how much people live in boxes. You get it, you see how I'm going with that. Now, let's look how hard I've worked trying to get people to come to the charity.

Roll the clip. So they roll this clip of Duri just calling everybody, you know, in the cast going, well, listen, we've got a new charity. We're working on names, toothless in terms of sexual. Right. Look at how Dundee is donating his necklace to be used as a smile for someone very lucky. I've already put in five calls with my former neighbour, Sharon Stone, but apparently she is hanging out with the Delay Lamar. So we're hoping that it'll be a star-studded event at some point.

Lisa Rima, please come to Toothless Depepo, the charity. We have decided to revamp the Capri room, and instead of lemons hanging from the ceiling, it'll be tea! And homeless people can come in and choose the tooth that they want and then they go back to the street where they live. Mouts just the cap room! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha And she said, you live with the dough man. And I said, isn't he attractive? And she said, we're listening. I wanted to talk to you. And I said, you listen here, Sharon Stone. P.K. is obsessed with anyone who will flash their beaver at him.

You're in. What do you want to discuss? I said, Sharon Stone. What do you think about homeless and toothless and chic? How about that? It was a bit hard. She was trying to push some sort of charity about people who lose their toes to Commodo dragons like her ex-husband, but I convinced her that teeth would be more fun than toes. I said Commodo to no-dow. You're a Commodo not not a Tomodo. It's not really a big deal, it doesn't share it.

Pumless, not without commodo dragon, but that didn't quite work. So we see a picture of PK's before teeth. That shit is disgusting. You put up an eating disorder thing every week at the end of this show. You better put up one for PK's teeth. Like if you get disturbed by seeing your PK's teeth, please call 1-800. Someone needs to help your disturbed ass

from looking at PK's teeth, something. But when I showed that picture to Sharon, she said, this looks like just like the thing that my husband's told of. So. Yeah, there's a lot of PK's old like before. There's a lot of before, before the after and it was very traumatic. So Doreet is Doreet invites Sam doctor Sam to this charity event and she's like

Maybe you'd like to come he goes, oh And maybe we can select a well-deserving person and we can give the gift of this smile like a well deserving person and we can give the gift of the smile. Like, or maybe the gift of, I don't know, house or I don't know. Like, you're gonna be honest. I'm homeless person teeth, but not the others. And only if they're deserving. I'm like, what is this? I know.

Marit, like, it's gonna be a meritocracy. Like, what are you gonna do? Like, have them play games to win the teeth? Listen, I think, I mean, look, that's, like, obviously, it's very important to have good dentistry and it is true. Like, if you have some issues with your teeth that actually could really impact you trying to get a job and get your life going.

But I feel like the name of this charity homeless, not toothless, is so funny because it sort of implies like, well, you're homeless, but that's just going to be the way it is. But we can fix the teeth. And I just, I'm like, they really need to reprand this thing. It also sounds like an argument, right? Like, I'm homeless, not toothless. You know, sounds like you're yelling at someone. But you know what I mean?

So obviously it's a good charity. We're just making fun of it, because it's on this show about. Yeah. So, Sudden is now in her office, Sutton, with Joshua. So sudden is now in her office, sitting with Joshua. So she's like, Joshua, I can never find my car keys. And he's like, it might help if you put them on the key chain. Now, Joshua, you and I both know that I have no idea what a key chain is. Okay. So before you start

throwing out these terms at me, you've got to educate first. Okay, Josh, well, you mother. So Crystal comes over and she's doing Kathy's howler or where, so she comes over and you know, they do small talk like you look safe, thank you, you were so dressed up. Crystal's like, yeah, I call this a kitchen sink out that it might not look coveity, but like, I might not look covenry, but am I not look covenry, but I'm really exhausted. Yeah. She's, Tritzel needs to work a little bit on her real house with the Beverly Hills.

What are you wearing? Who are you wearing? And Tritzel says, she's like, yeah, it's not a kitchen sink outfit. So, so it's like trying to sort of jokely get her to work at the boutique because her daughter has a sore throat and, uh, she's like, I pay commission. Okay, you can make a lot of money here. And they just like show all the very, very full racks of clothing that I'm helping purchase, you know, and like bright pink dresses with bright

pink feathered bowels attached to them. And they put sound effects of crickets over them. Like, like, look at all the reactions of the clothes. Crickets? Crickets? Yeah. Things flying up the shelves. And Crystal's like, well, I mean, I did work. I was a Victoria's Secret when I was 16, but I got fired because I was too yachten. How did you get hired then? None of this is making sense.

I can't believe Victoria's Victoria would have poor hiring standards. So she's like, so I walked right across the street to finish line. And I hate feet, but I got three bucks commission if I sold shoe clean air. I was like, I gave them those people. I knew that they were giving those kids extra money to do that shit. And I'm the one who falls for it every time. So I'm like, if you don't buy it, they're going to bully you, you know? If you, they don't buy it, they'll know your gay. Okay, I'll buy this you cleaner. Every time. And then you try and use it. And it just like

smears some weird color that's not even the same colors or she won your shoe. And then you get on on your hands. and it doesn't quite wear off. You smell it while you're trying to eat cheetos, fuck those people. This makes me not like Crystal. There I said. So Crystal's like, so how was Sabado, meaning Saturday? And it sounds like it was terrible. And so Crystal says that she actually met up with Lisa right out of the day before and

like got the skinny on what happened according to Lisa. And Sutton's like, well Lisa blew up at me. And Crystal said, well she says that she's very angry at you. Well, but we went to lunch, she didn't say that at lunch. She waits until she has an audience so she can explode and then look at me like she wants to kill me.

And she's like, well do you want to resolve this or not? She's like, I have done everything I can. This is on her, not me. You know what I'm sick of talking about? Except talk to me because you have not talked about what's going on with you. Okay? I'm starting to start some eating disorder drama right now

because I'm really sick of my own. Okay? She's like, I'm not going to say the words eating disorder, but I'll just say, what's going on with you? Late. Yeah. She's like, I'm not going to say the words eating disorder, but I'll just say, what's going on with you? Late. Late. Late.

Like, I'll just say lately, really, slowly, and that will imply eating disorder. Blah, blah. So Chris says eating disorder? So, like a question. Yeah. So, Chris, she a question. Yeah. So, Crystal, she says it's talked to Rena about Amelia and Rena says that everyone was talking about Crystal's eating disorder and we see a flashback of Rena saying that it came up and that she can get Crystal help.

She went through this with Amelia so she can help out Crystal if she wants it, etc. And Crystal sort of, she's, sounds like she's not ready to get help because I think that the, well, she says that she doesn't want to face the notion that this is going to be forever, I guess. So she's struggling. Yeah. And certain, it's like, well, the concern concern was like, is it grave concern for crystal or and she's like, what, like judging me, were they like judging me?

No, but they were using your shit as like fodder for gossip. Yeah. It was kind of tacky. At the same time, I guess on the other hand, she's kind of making it her storyline. I don't know where I fall on this. Yeah, I thought it was really gross watching the scene. But I thought it was gross that they air, like that Doree just sort of like put it out there.

What I imagine is sort of sensitive stuff that Crystal was talking about. But I didn't, but simultaneously, I didn't feel like they were being judgy. I just felt like they were like, I actually felt like there was maybe actually a shred of concern there, but it was just, but it felt like it's acting in the way

that they did it, that makes sense. Yeah, so, the sudden's basically, I think, saying like, I don't know if it was like grave concern or just gossip basically, but Crystal's like, oh, they were judging me because I've been eating disorder and she's like, or just saying, what is this? You know, and Crystal's like, oh, they were judging me because I've been eating disorder. And she's like, or just saying, my, what is this? You know, and she's like, um, well, this is a lifelong journey.

And it's not about money or time. I have a disorder. So I'll find a page from their perfect book. Okay. I guess I just want to have this in a week, guys. So she's like, piss now, you know, which I get it, but you kind of open yourself up to that. It's almost like

No, I guess I don't want to compare to Slow It is I'm like well, that's probably a pretty shallow way of pulling from your own fast to relate to this So I'm not gonna do that madam, but there are a lot of like well-intentioned landlines that we can just dip right on right now Yes, yes, but we bring it up, of course, people are going to ask. It's like the second you say, oh, I'm not having a drink today, but then someone's easy drinking. They're like, um, I thought you weren't going to drink for that.

And you're like, why are you judging me? But you open yourself up by saying, I'm drinking too much. So you've got to step back. Yeah, exactly. It's time for commercial. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court.

I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the host of Wonder e's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud. From the build up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What deserve session with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows.

It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. Let's talk about something a little bit more vocative and interesting and emotional for

me. I want to talk about something that brings me a little bit of a tear to my eye. I'm talking about Asher playing a piano in the living room with a Fedora on. So lost in his music, he's forgotten. His own girlfriend is in the same house except for the fact that there's a camera crew all around him. He's playing some sort of like like failed Broadway song. It sounds like a ballad and... Well it's like it's like typical.

Like when you learn how to play your piano chords and begin, aren't there? Like, okay, here's your one four five for whatever. Like his chord, he's like, Link, would you be there when I'm drowning? In the depths of my despair, I just want you to hold me so I never feel lonely. Oh my God, shut up, shut up, I hate you.'t forget you're in the house. There's a camera crew in his face and he's auditioning for America right now.

Second of all, you never leave me. I'm going to be a little bit more honest. I'm going to be a little bit more honest. I'm going to be a little bit more honest. I'm going to be a little bit more honest. I'm going to be a little bit more honest. I'm going to be a little bit more honest. I'm going to be a little bit more honest. I'm going, you didn't forget you're in the house. There's a camera crew in his face and he's auditioning for America right now.

Second of all, you never leave the house. It sounds like, because there's dust out there in the world. So you're always there. So how do we, we've never forget that you're there. What a poser, this kid chip from Beauty and the Beast with a fedora and little, those little sideways diamond sunglasses he's wearing.

I'm like, you're already looked at like a paid four twink. Why are you trying to look younger? Why? Yeah. Why? It's sad. Then Dahana says, Oh, you know, Asha has led a very sh-

a dead life growing up on Broadway. He's always been at my aton stage. He's very sweet and he's a child. I'm like, wow, all the things that I look for in a partner sheltered and a child. Literally, Diana, literally, okay, you just make yourself look gross with all of this. So he's like, well, the baby is about to be born, meaning my music. I'm like, well, yeah, okay. And she's like, well, you know, he's softening me a lot because he needs my hardness and my strength and money.

And he's just not confrontational at all. That's my strength. Yeah, of course he's not confrontational. You think he's gonna argue with the lady who's bankrolling whatever the fuck this is. Listen, not many people are gonna pay for. I want you to hold me so I never feel lonely. Yeah, okay. I want his album to be called Whatever the Fuck This Is. That's what I wanted to be called. So they go, they retire to the living room to have lunch. And so it's served to them. It's just basically caviar and like a light salad.

Yeah, so that's why, that is why Ashir is not being argumentative. So then they start talking about having a baby again, like trying again, and you know, like how it's actually good because now they're young, they're the baby that they have, can like they can have some time with that baby, they can hold and whatever, give it attention. And then Diana says that Asha really grew up fast when she had them miscarried.

I'm like, yeah, I'm sure he did. You know, it's a big thing. But also like, again, why are you dating a child? Why are you dating someone that needs to just like get to the basic level, the entry level, you know what I'm saying? He's like, well, you know, I really want to take this time to work on my music and say, oh, yeah, you know, we can try again later. Like, well, the times are ticking for one of you, okay?

So Erica comes to Kyle's and Kyle's like, oh my God, there's so much going on. There's like, gardeners and I had to tell the gardeners what the dog pick-reppers were saying about them. And then they got in a fight. I mean, it was so much. It was a lot. So this is I love what Kyle concocks Busyness in her life. That's not really busyness. You know, she's like, oh my god. There's like so much going on Like I've got to take the decorations down and there's a gardener here and then there's an electrician down the street

There's like just so much that's happening right now. It's like there's really not a lot happening You're just like you're doing nothing. Yeah. You're actually just sitting in your house while other people are cleaning various parts of your estate. It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so.

It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so.

It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so. It's like, so. there. I'm literally going to 100 different lunches right now at 12 o'clock. I'm both getting into the building and checking people for their security clearance. It's crazy how much I'm doing. So they go back to the backyard and Dustin is there. He's a stretch coach, which is a me and math guy, which welcome to your future, Asher. I love that they followed Asher trying to sing his shitty song with the sound bath guy. They have a loosen of the fuck boy. Asher is like a sound hobath, you know what I'm saying? So, but he is, he has official title is Stretch Coach, which may be a stretch that he's a coach, but they have a gong set up and they're stretching.

There's a lot of stretching and Erica's like, wow, I think I'm having a love affair with the pain. So I just lean into it. Wow. And then that's Kyle's turn. And of course, Kyle can't just stretch. She has to reveal a new melody that she is besieged by. She's like, I'm not just bendy, I actually have something called hyper mobility syndrome, and this is actually a problem and you're not supposed to be born like this, but I am, and sometimes my arms and legs

and brain go numb, it's terrible. I looked up this, and this is like when joints are like popping out, like you're flexible in the wrong places, I don't think that when you can just do the splits and like fucking do the splits on every dance floor, you come across Kyle. I don't think that that's really the same thing.

But I love that they're, they've both got their personality lines like spouted out, you know, every time. Because Erica's like, oh yeah, flexible, works out now. Situat, you rock, a drop, I love, I do. It's like, of course course Erica's got a blanche Blanche from golden It's gonna say oh you're different. I was gonna say Dubois, but I caught myself and then Kyle is like

But I'm the real victim here. I haven't done this that makes me to Discuss it probably true Soon Kyle is gonna announce that she has uncomfortable hair syndrome, you know, which is a real thing. By the way, it's a real thing. It's not their future asher. I really love this gong. You can get them at gong's unlimited.

Which by the way, can we just pause? That there's a website called gong's unlimited for all your gong needs. Gongs on them. Do they have just like a few gongs? No, girl. It's gong unlimited. They have it on the gong here. I mean, take it from our spokesperson,

Lady Gong Gong. Lady? Oh, girl face gong. Gong Lee is here. Isn't there an actress named Gang Lee? Anyway, so it's from a place called Gongs Unlimited. Then Kyle goes, Dongs, okay, Kyle. Well, she actually goes, D-O-N-G-S.

Okay, first of all, Kyle, you just asked where the Gong is from. And he said, Gongs Unlimited. So why would you even think that Gongs are sold at a place called DONGS Unlimited? Okay. I know she's just tricking you know. I'm just tricky. It's like that that random middle aged person who might be actually searching the word DONG. Like, got her. We've got a gone converse. And of course course Erica says exactly what you think she would say to you. She's like That's the limited sound like the porn search I was like oh my god Erica you're in your 50s. You're gonna have to find something else to your personality. It's old You know also literally find something else

By the way, I don't think anyone who's looking at porn ever says sounds like something on my porn search who's looking at porn ever says sounds like something on my porn search. First time that you're not looking for porn as you call up my porn search. Time for porn search. I was searching for dogs unlimited the other day. So then they have tea. And I put tea with bear cups. I don't know. I'll tell you why.

I will tell you why. So Kyle, Kyle goes, oh my God, look at these little bears. Aren't they so cute? So now those are the Ralph Lauren bears, because Ralph Lauren puts these cute bears on bears, things like sweaters and stuff. So immediately I was like, okay, she's like, this is so cute as if she went to some drift store

and found these adorable mugs with bears. No, they're like mass produced, which is fine. They can still be cute. But I just loved that she drew attention to them, because of course I looked it up and like to buy a set of four of those mugs cost $175. So it just to me is like Kyle really just drawing attention to the fact she got design her coffee mugs, which I hope that freaking storm or that other like wild animal dog that she has. What's it called? Like Wally Popper something or Bambi? Oh, I can't wait for Bambi to knock it over. And then Kyle to say, oh, well, you can't control

Bambi. Well, how do you think about that? Once Bambi destroys your $175 coffee mugs, that anyone can get, by the way, Kyle, not just you. Meanwhile, you're doing it to your presenting these in front of your poor friend who's literally going to go home and buy the rights to Dawson Limited. She got them at Mugs Unlimited. So Kyle's asking Erica about what her dating situation is, and Erica's like, yeah, I'm going out the older man. Well, I mean, younger, but older, I mean, younger than Tom, but older than me.

So, yeah, one search is a man right? God, I live such a long life. I love that. That's a long, long, long, long, long. So Kyle's like, let's start with the party. Carsel talked about your drinking at the party in Erica Rolls-Horrised. And she's like, well, I'm a little loving this whole story

but in Circula he did the airing of drama. I don't have a problem. I've never had a problem. You really realize who your friends are in these moments. Erica, I'm just like, this is when you realize who your friends are. Okay. No one, Erica, this is when you realize your friends are. Okay. No one, Erica, because you bought all your friends

by bragging about private planes and shit that was being taken from poor people. Okay. No one's really your friend. When you're all you do is brag about how you can take them places on your private plane. Yeah, I hate this idea of holding all friendship hostage for every situation.

Like the moment someone says something critical, well, this is one of your fond out who your real friends are. Do they serve your tea in mugs with bears on them? What do they just use some free thing they got from a conference? That's when you know who the real friends are. But do you think she's coming from a good place? Well, it's a 10-dampton sitcom. It's a bad place. Kyle's a very, very bad place. I don't want this. Oh, so she does this monologue for us. She's like, I don't want this.

I don't want to be a medication. I don't want to be a disposition. I don't want to be in this house. I don't want to be anything I am right now, but you know what, God damn it. It's where I am. And I fucked myself out of it the best way. I know how.

OK. I never said I was a good mother, but I'm trying the best that I can. I love, I just love when she's like, I don't want to be in this house. This disgusting, a multi-million dollar house with a pool and more than enough room for me to live there. I come to believe I don't want to be in it anymore. My irony is that house would probably sell more than the dump in Pasadena, which they could not flow to save their lives? I mean, the lawyer Ronald Richards was like, we're

putting a bit in for $5. I'm getting my fee this bad. Her car house is probably, her car house is nicer. It might be smaller, but it's nicer. So Eric is like, the good, I guess the moral of the story is he can't have a good time in front of these people Well, I guess that that was the moral of the story for Denise Richards who had a good time with Brandy Glanville and then Had to sit and listen to You all just tear apart over it. All right, but also while we're looking for lessons You can have a good time in front of these people. You just have to be a good time. You know what I mean? So you need to learn to be a good time

while you have a good time. You've got a long road ahead. Yeah, speaking of another sitcom. Good times. Good times. So, Kyle's like, is everyone going to go to Dereads Black and Gold Party? I'm really confused about what it is. America's like, okay, hopeless, not toothless. And they start cracking up. I was like, I can't with the name. And I are like, my name is wrong. The name is wrong. But maybe that was the point. It's like, what, do you're supposed to bring your spare teeth to the party? No, you're not going to forget, well, that's a little. So, well, also, you all do have spare teeth, which is kind of funny that Kyle makes that

joke. She's like, what are we supposed to bring our spare teeth? Lord knows you've all gone through four pairs each. You know what I mean? You've got new teeth every time. The least you could do is donate them to somebody in the cat. Kathy's going to show up there with her hands, Kyle. I'd like some more chiefs, please.

So, she loves to see. So getting ready for the... Lamb. Lamb time. So Robin, Crystal are getting dressed and being wacky and they're very entertained, I'm not really. And then we go to Garcela Olens Sutton Face Timing and Sutton's like, if you think me sit next to Lisa,

would you please come switch seats with me? Hmm. And then our Kyle is Face Timing with Brenna certain, it's like, if you see me sit next to Lisa, would you please come switch seats with me? And then our Kyle is FaceTiming with Brenna and we're going to say, Hello, God, and God! And we find out that Harry is not coming because he basically doesn't leave the house anymore. And she talks about, Brenna talks about COVID, where she was tired and foggy and sweat, she sweat a lot, which is much like my experience, too. So there you go, everyone. I'm likely to run a while. I'm sick. And also everybody else with COVID. It's not very easy.

Yeah, it's not so weird. I'm out of cold. I got a runny nose. Oh my god, me too. So now over a weekend to reach, Pekis, where's my boom shell? Where's my baby? or peek-and-de-ree its, uh, peek-and-de-ree, it's like, where is my boom shell? Where's my baby? So they've set up this big dinner set up in their, for your ish area. And they've set these tables up and they all have this like shiny,

these shiny gold tablecloths, but they're like, it's actually kind of like a leopard print asked or tiger. So it's like gold with like weird black splotches and then like red flowers on it. It's like really the most hideous table decor we've ever ever ever ever seen.

It's green cake. It's a bad. So I make the party planners all skeevy and he's like, I pick this fabric because it seems like dress you with wear. I've stoned little ccs I'll over it to look like a knockoff so it seems like the real you you're gonna love it PK is like it looks like a work of art babe a work of art. I'm like yeah, I should eat work of art, okay? so

Doreet is like I love a theme But I don't like when people put a dress code that's difficult to achieve. And I thought, gee, black and gold, that's not difficult, it's very chic. So I know each and every one of them is going to kick it out of the park. So they're running down time, you know, because to read as everybody do, she's one of those, like typical. You have everybody else working for you, but then you're like, here's the time at 6,000 people will enter at 615. We will see host of those which watch out. We've got pigs in a blanket. Just like I love this exact like this is fine.

Fair. Yeah. With the undercooked pigs in a blanket blanket I'd like to add, those things were like white on the outside. Those are like PK out the shower. So there's your talk about how there's gonna be a surprise musical guest and they have a really good, you know, they have a good track record with this and then we get to see a flashback to one of our favorite excuses for a surprise. I'm terribly sorry about the curtain during this dinner party. We have a massive black mold issue.

Please, please enjoy this food next to this kind of mold area. So he's like, all right, here's what's going to happen. We're going to have our special surprise guest come out and all have this remote control here for the lighting. He's like, don't you mess with the lights, Peek egg, you can't do the lights. I can. I know how to work the lights. Sure I do. No, you don't. You'll remind your idiot. Like Darius, losing her mind over these lights and it's so true.

This is like such a guy thing to do. Yes. So you know my house, they're all on like a little remote and I can be like, what should I do? Tell the lights in the living room. And then they don't work. I'm like, I can't. I'm like, I can't.

I'm like, what's the living room? I feel like we definitely had a few live shows that went as smoothly as PK's lighting. Lighting moments like, okay, we're going to start the show, drop the lights, all the lights come up. So, it's what you just like. She's lights, all the lights come up. So, I said she's like, she's like, don't touch a thing, don't PK, you're scaring me right now, just scaring me right now, PK.

You weren't scared during the teeth before picture, you're not allowed to be scared now. You know what I mean? You showed that you've got a stomach of steel lady. So, Rima's picking up Erica and Erica's like, I'll be shoe sock. The hucker shoe. I found them when I was doing a porn search for shoe fetishes on porn. On porn porn.com slash porn. That was actually designed by Gong Lee. So, so can the arise with, I'm love this is the surface to you, Sige, on Bravo, but

God, this guy has been passed around like the vid. Yeah. He's all over. It wasn't he Taylor's best friend. He started off as Taylor. You know, this is the, this is the moment like, this we're resurrecting all of Taylor Armstrong, and that includes her gay. Okay.

He started as Taylor's gay, and then he sort of like worked his way into the Vanderpump world, and then he nearly killed Ken, and he disappeared for a little bit, and he's been resurrected by Kathy. By the way, I mean, if you're a gay, he knows what he's doing. I mean, he got resurrected by like a top, a top socialite in the city, say what you will by Kathy Hilton, but that is he struck gold as an aspiring hanger on, you know? Yeah, because he went to Kathy Hilton, probably through Vanderpomp and then the next stop that we go from Kathy Hilton. Chris Kardashian is the only place left.

Yeah. The only stop left is Chris Kardashian and be careful. Don't fall into the favor as a trap because she is like, she's like a little bit of a trap on the way. You got to like avoid it. It's like the poppies and Mr. D'Vas, you know? Before you know it, you're going to have store bought shelving in your closet. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. So I love those scenes. I miss those scenes that were cast. Like, wow, Faith Resnick redid my home. And it's like, that's like a live-life love wood cut out from home to, and it's gitt. I saw the same one at home goods. It's like, I've never seen a wrought iron do they before,

but she did it. Very heavy. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crapence commercial. So, so yeah, so Dwight is back and Doreet tries to be, she tries to, she's like, we know Dwight from a former friend, and when we see Dwight pushing Ken into the pool, and then from that former friend, we know a lot of friends with that friend, because she's formally said things in a red-o-on line, but now Dwight is back. So, Dwight, you're back in the PK folds. That's not a place I ever want to be. So then Kathy, Kathy's like,

oh my God, I love the front of the table decorations. Those are amazing. Oh, Doritos, are you wearing the same dress? Amazing. Yeah, Kathy looks at the place tag, she goes, oh, Leanne's coming tonight. And they're like, no, that's Diana. But I'm like, I wonder which Leanne she was thinking of, because if it was Leanne lock-in, I just love the idea that in her mind, Leanne's coming tonight. And they're like, no, that's Diana. But I'm like, I wonder which Leanne she was thinking of,

because if it was Leanne Locke, and I just love the idea that in her mind, Leanne Locke, oh, I'm here with my other fuckers. All right, who wants to eat? Because I can give, I'll give me a hammer, I'll give Mon right to any homeless person. It's easy for me to do. I've done it before.

By the way, Leanne Locke posted a photo with her and Leanne more the other day. And I just is like, God, I love this world. I like where, I don't know how Leanne Locke posted a photo with her and Julianne Moore the other day. And I just was like, God, I love this world. I don't know how Leanne Locken and Julianne Moore cross paths make a photo together, but it happened. And you know, God bless. Some were Julianne Moore's like,

can you ever see that movie with her? Of course. I love that movie. Is a safe safe. Also known as like the real housewives of every city. I know. I also know his Kyle Richards. Kyle Richards. He's like, it's a disease. So, um, so Kathy is like, well, well love the font, it's beautiful. And then Diana shows up in like bright,

I would argue not gold, I would argue shiny yellow. And she's like, is this gold enough for you? I look like pirates dream, I'm a twister chest. You need to do well in here I am. So Kathy's like, where's your boyfriend? And she's like, he's doing a concert, internet, virtual, something. I don't know. I just set the whole thing up and paid for people to sign on through.

So, I don't know. Kid, auditioning for Nickelodeon's America's next best kid singer, I believe. I don't know. I don't know. He looks fun, but he puts lime on head. Well, he's very talented. I really didn't know I don't know he looks fun, but he puts lime on head. Well, he's very talented. I really didn't know what to expect nine times out of 10. It's a disaster.

So my first to death that like you got one. You finally got a talented child. I mean, did you hear my daughter single? I mean, God bless God bless. So now Erica and Rina are arriving and Rina's, they just talking about drinking. I'm already had a shot to Kila I've already had a shot and

They go up the stairs and Rina of course enters the most Rina way going oh God Yeah, it's you. Oh, yeah, I'm a strong guy. How are you? Oh, so then everybody starts showing up, you know, and so then we see the charity wraps, right? So this is the dentist daughter, the dentist. Well The dentist is a different dentist. Yeah, different. Jake Grossman, right? So this is Jake Grossman. So he does a lot of this stuff.

He set up this charity. And I guess he sent his daughters over here. All right. And they're like excited to be here. God bless these girls. Right? They're like excited to be here. And they're like, thank you so much for doing this. My dad is so sad. He's not here. And it's like, Dr. J Grossman is done so much. He's so sad. Really? Here to rule the tape. And then we see Dr. J Grossman and he's like, yeah, I've got nine kids. Yeah, I mean, I thought I had three, but then six showed up at my door after I did 23 of me. I had three, but then six showed up at my door after I did 23 and me. Oh, you're a spam donor.

Yeah. Yeah. That was the joke to read. Yeah. Wacky, guys, I think there's a Netflix movie about you, sir. Okay. You're ruining this charitable episode. Okay.

Back on creep. Jesus. Seriously. So, um, they're talking, Kathy is, we just see, we're seeing shots of the of the party right so then we see a shot of Kathy talking to these sisters and she's like, oh, so it's a charity for teeth. Oh, well it's hard to talk without teeth. Teeth are very important. Live two sets on right now actually. You're a very important piece. You know what, it's very difficult to brush your teeth if you don't have any teeth. So, you know, have you ever tried to floss when you have no teeth?

It's very, it's actually much easier. You just can go right across, but my point remains. So then the sad pigs in the blanket. I wrote very sad pigs in the blanket have they been cooked. That was obviously really upset about this. I wrote PK getting out of the shower. So then, you know, Kyle and Maricio have arrived and Maricio has not wearing any gold because PK is going to be giving him the final piece of the puzzle on that front. So PK gives him a belt. He's like,

here you go. That's your new favorite belt. It looks like a seat belt because I had a DUI. We can all talk about it now All right, babe. Wow, this belt is amazing. Where did you get this belt? Actually, it was just being kept in a comforter in the garden So it was easy to find so Rob's like so guys. Hey, you you got a Vegas match BK And he goes like oh all the time when I got pulled over for the D.U.I, I'd actually just been with Lionel Richie that night, or as I call him Lionel. All right. Also John Legend, or as I call him John actually, you know, he probably would prefer Legend, but it's not really going to go that way, is it, mate? Here is just me and John, I mean, me, John and Lionel, and not the model trend on that Lionel,

which of course, and you know, it was a great start, but you know, the whole thing went from bad to worse. The real lesson here is when you think you're okay, you probably are okay until we get pulled over by the police. So, that's the lesson. And you love shady ass Rob because you know Rob knows that PK has been in big trouble with the Bellagio for not paying back like two like one point something million dollars that they owe.

So I love that Rob's just like you didn't fake it much. Okay. Doesn't didn't Gina on real house as a Melbourne have some sort of psychic connection with Lionel Richie. What was it? What was that thing again that like a psychic came and was like you the like the love of your life is Lionel Richie. Was there something like that? Are you mind making that?

I don't know. I don't remember. But I will say I'm annoyed with Lionel Richie because he has no loyalty. Okay. Because do you remember when he wrote a song for the Savannah pump? No, I don't. Didn't she record something with him with Lionel Richie? Is that going to be that at all? Yeah. It was on the show. Because Lionel came up to the show and she sang something. She sang something with Lionel Richie.

I mean, Lionel's part of this world. I mean, Nicole, his daughter and Nicole, okay. It's everyone's connected on this in Hollywood. It's like this tier. They're all connected. It's amazing. I have to look it up. So Lionel Richie, Lisa Vanderpomp, Lisa Vanderpomp goes reggae with help from Lionel Richie. Lisa had a line up in the middle by the Real Housewives Recording Bug. The star just recorded a reggae version of Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow after dreaming

up the idea with your friend Lionel Richie. Yes, you read that correctly. Um, I'm looking up, well, since you're looking up something, I'm looking up the Lionel Richie connection to real housewives of Melbourne and from what I can find. Um, oh, you know what it was, it was that Gina went and she saw a holistic life coach named Timura and Timura was like, oh, if we're with all sorts of people, like Lionel Richie. I like your version better. So, Eric is hearing this whole story and she's like, Lionel Richie, oh, yeah. In P.K. he says, yeah, the policeman says, where have you been? And she's like, Lionel Richie, oh, show it, yeah. In P.K. says, yeah, the policeman says,

where have you been? And I said, with Lionel Richie and John Legend, and then it went from bad to worse. It's like, oh, yay, top the day, now kiss your ass. He's like, well, the real lesson there was when you think you're okay, you might not be. And she goes, huh.

She's like still wrapping her mind around that lesson. So, huh. So then, a sudden is arriving and she's brought olive oil and oregano for to read. And then, Rina is being vicious. Hi, Sats! Hi! How are you?

How are you? I think anytime Rina says, how are you? That means she's angry at you. How are you? Because if she loves you, she'll go, how are you? She's says, how are ya? That means she's angry at you. How are ya? Because if she loves you, she'll go, how are you? She's just, how are ya? You're like, oh shit, fucked up. So I'm like, well, she's angry and she's not letting me go.

So what's she gonna do? Tell me to get the fuck out of Doreet's half-steep. Don't put it past her. Yeah, she would. So they're all like Rina's marvelling. This is like the first time in six weeks that they've all been together because of COVID Like we're finally all together and then someone's like, oh, but Sherees not here now Sheree has COVID and you know that they all were thinking

She's a friend of it doesn't really count. We're all together. So then um Now Dr. Sam arrives and Garsell Garsell looked the best out of everyone She's the only one who I feel like truly got the like nailed the theme and that of everyone. She's the only one who I feel like truly got the like nailed theme. And, um, and of course, because Garcell has arrived, we get a Rina. Hi Garcell! Yeah! It took me almost as long to say your name as it did for you to think Harry for his pasta sauce. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha do a little fashion rundown of the women. So PK is like they look nice. The ladies don't they look nice babe man babe. And Mauricio's

like yeah the read stress is beautiful. Erica's dress is very short's a short. Very short. It's too short to make up a thing out of. So it's done. It's over. I'm sadding. Well, because, all right, then, who wins if it's a contest between all the ladies and Marisa is like, my wife? No, no, no.

If we had to take the wives out of the equation, who would win this one? Your wife? No. Both wives are out. All right. All right. know if we had to take the wives out of the equation who would win this one your wife no both wives are out all right all right all right let's do this let's announce it well on the count of three we'll announce who looks the best okay all right three two two one one one one, Reyna, Erica, Erica's panties specifically. Yeah, PK. Pringle Rebe. Meanwhile, Erica's like, oh my God, look at these shoes.

They're over 15 years old. Wow, your shoes are old and effort I had to date. So then we go to the reach. No, who's next? I think we go to the reach. It's reach, because now she's trying to set up Garth's stuff. I was telling Garth,

so that we have this friend. He's our tax accountant, and he's a successful charming man. He's debonnie, he dresses nice. He used to do the commercials for Pathbock. He's wonderful. So you're trying to set her up with somebody who's terrible at hiding things because your tax person isn't doing a great job. Okay, from what I've read in the blogs, ma'am. He's like, listen, the text has like, listen, I

don't draw you from my services as long as you set me up with a beautiful young lady. Okay, I know just the person. So Eric was like, oh, this is Jimmy guy we're talking about. Wow. And she's like, oh, this is your new guy with talking about that. Wow. And she's like, yeah, apparently. And to read it's like, he's like dibonia. Oh, debonia. Hey, that sounds like a syllable I use on a porn search. Bone, get it? Debonair. Hey, born. So, um, I'm going to give him a Gibson being born on an airplane. Fuck me.

Ha ha ha ha. Still pretty hot. Hot thing to show up on a porn search, you know? So, Garza was like, so, to risk being talking about this guy for a year, we see flashbacks where she's like, gee, I got to talk to you about Don. He's 60, but he doesn't look 60 to you about Don. He's 60, but he doesn't

look 60. He looks 70. He's damn it. And Erica's like, yeah, well, she sat by you up to, but I've never even heard from the guy. So, you know, I mean, nothing like the effort, though. So Doreet just goes around promising people she's found them loved but they never delivers with the fuck. Doreet. Yeah. Doreet has literally never matched made once in six years promising people she's found them love but they never delivers with the fuck. Yeah. Marie has literally never match made once in six years and she's like, I'm actually a pretty good matchmaker. Like maybe you can physically make a match, but I don't know. So, uh...

I'm also... Erica has obvious co-guys. And by the way, for anyone keeping score, Erica just keeps like, you just keep catching Erica with these wide eyes staring at something like. So then he came, we're still talking and Marisa is like, dude, you're getting muscular. Look at that. Look at that. And he's like punching, he's like poking at him. And he's like, Oh, you're being funny then. Oh, yeah. You're being hilarious. No, you are, man. You are so muscular, right? I was like, oh, you know what? You're feeling some of the undergarments

that Lionel gave me, the made to make you look more shapely. So now it's time for dinner. They also down. There we are, the big moment. They sit down on this hideous table and Rinna's like, hi everybody. Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi. And then she's looking at the menu. She's getting excited. She's like, oh my God. Ha, chicken parm, chocolate chip cookies,

Ankyline pie. Yeah. I'm like, lady, have you not been to any sort of food establishment in five years? I mean, like it. And then the menu, did you look at the menu, Ron, because I would like to discuss this menu with you, please? No, but I'd love to hear about it. Tell me. I wrote it down. So starters, barata salad, and then you have a choice of either an American chop salad or a classic wedge. Then for the entree, a chicken parm with spaghetti marinara, and then on the sides, jalapeno cream corn and spaghetti squash per mavera.

I'm sorry. None of this makes sense. What the hell? What j junky ass menu is this? This is terrible. This is mad, this is quite. This is quite cooking. Like what, okay, first of all, okay. So the chicken parm, so it's like,

oh, this is gonna be like a red sauce, Italian meal, but not really both jalapeno cream corn. But then also the parm is served as spaghetti marinara, but on the side you have spaghetti squash from the various. You have two spaghetti type things with your entree. Just spaghetti, yes, bad. Any party I see with key lime on the menu,

like key lime pie on the menu, like what do you, Luby's, please. Listen, I'm down for a key lime. I love key lime pie. I'm just saying, but not this fancy party. Like, I don't, I don't know. Well, don't tell key lime, hi. But just saying, it's a fancy party. Like, I don't, I don't know. Well, don't tell Ina Garten that

because her favorite thing to do is that when there's a fancy party, she does something casual. She loves to disarm like that. That's a classic Inaism. But this was not an Ina Garten moment. I will tell you that much. Don't think for one moment,

I'm giving any Ina Garten cred to Doree in this horrific menu. Thank you very much. Defense right? I won't even tell you what I, what I found when I searched up barefoot, Bontessa, all right? Ha ha ha ha ha. God, Inaigartan, that sounds like something in one of my porn searches, right? Am I right, everyone? Uh, so, um, hi, hi, hi, everyone, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, It's all specifically red and white. And I'm green.

Marata spaghetti. Anyway, enough about that. So Erica, Erica is like, I think, well, you know, like I'm gonna have a drink. Everyone is like, well, you said the champagne was very strong for you. So maybe we don't do champagne and they're like, how about a mixed drink?

I was like, oh yeah, mixed drinks famously much weaker than champagne. Right, ourselves watching, yeah, they're logic. So Garsell's watching this and she's like, well, I saw her at the wine tasting and she was borderline. So let's see tonight. Okay, this whole like baby sitting somebody is drinking, I'm not loving.

Like do something else. I don't love that either, actually. Do something else. It's an O'erica's a mess. Like who cares? What do you care? You don't even like her. I actually agree.

I love Garcell, but I also feel like Garcell doesn't have to worry. I think what Garcell could just be, I think I would rather Garcell just be rolling her eyes at Erika not being able to handle her liquor. You know, like I like that vibe more than being like she's drinking too much like She's an adult. Yeah, you know, so Doreet's like hello everyone. It's time for a speech and grandma's like hi Hi Sweet I know her Go ahead. Well, the chatty is called Homeless, not Toothless, as I told you. And Kathy goes,

what's it called? Homeless, not Toothless. That's great. You know what you need to eat. You don't really need a home, though. So, then there's a good title. And it's like, and the doctor has donated one full smile to a worthy homeless person. The most homeless person here gets to have a truth. So, yes. You're a good step up and take your prize. That's gonna be best in your frankly.

I mean, I'll be at the homeless right now. I'm a homeless person. Okay. Like seriously, what's going on? I'm homeless. All right. I'm a homeless person. Okay. Like seriously, what's going on? I'm homeless. I'm a homeless person. So, Diana, Diana tells us a very interesting tidbit, she says, we're not within my 20s. I depend on the charity to remove my wisdom teeth. And it's really full circle now. Weedly enough, I actually grew a second path wisdom teeth,

like, like a shark. I'm like, no, they took out the wrong teeth. I don't tell you. I need to bring the bad news. They took out the wrong teeth. I actually looked this one up to you. It's a very educational day. Today I'll watch it crap. It's but I've looked this up to you. I was like, can wisdom teeth grow back?

Because I've never heard that shit. And apparently they don't grow back, but some people have extra teeth that are just like lying there and wait like a fucking pesdiscensor. It's like, some people are just lucky, I guess you have other teeth just waiting to pop back. That's kind of fun. Stack up teeth. Yeah.

Diana. Now that's a woman who could chop a wedge. All right. I knew she had extra faces, but not extra teeth. You know, so Garsell's like shows the doc his kids. I don't know. Oh, she's talking to the doctor and she's like, oh, you know, hear my kids and he's like, oh, you look great in these pictures.

And she goes, well, I've had no Botox mind you. Mm-hmm. And he says, they just sort of banter. I was like, I'm bored with their banter. I don't want to hear Dr. Sam's banter. Well, I started writing halfway through, so I guess I got bored too. I was like, I'm bored with their banter. I don't want to hear Dr. Sam's banter. Well, I started writing halfway through, so I guess I got bored too. I was like, that's a cent. It was like, I was like, I'm not committing this. So we're not going to be blocking this. This is not going to be part of the U-Watcher Crappens permanent record.

So then Kyle is like, hmm, everything's going to nicely. Let me make people angry so she goes She's like hey, so last Saturday at the wine tasting I heard the Rina said to you son get the fuck out of my house and Garsell's like Yes, she did say that and Kyle's like but Rina said she didn't say that like she said maybe I should leave I don't know was I just hear wrong or might yours just being hyper flexible at that moment? Did I hear it wrong incorrectly? So then we see a clip of Reina. She's like, oh, my ears are doing the splits.

Hold on. Hold on. So we see a clip of Reina. And she's like, I didn't say, get the fuck out of my house. I said, you're not doing or saying what I want. So maybe you should just leave. Ha, ha, ha, ha. So I was like, well, she said it wasn't serious

because you didn't leave, so it wasn't really that big of a deal. And so, it's like, I don't wanna talk about this at the dinner table, okay? Maybe we can do this later, not in front of these people, okay? You don't do that. You don't do that. They just like cut to Sydney, Sydney Grossman being like,

oh, so Kyle is like, Dary, because Kyle is sitting at the center. It's like, it's like a, uh, horseshoe shape and she's at the, at the top of the horseshoe. So she's like pivoting to the other table now. And she's like, Dary, when Rina, when Rina told Sutton to leave, did she say get out of my house? Or did she say get the fuck out of my house? Dary, she's like, get the fuck out of my house. How dare you, motherfucker?

No, I was repeating what Brenna said. Oh, I apologize. Well, Brenna said it didn't happen like that. So what is it? Gerstel's like, oh my God, she just said she didn't want to talk about it. Why is Kyle bringing it up? She's always ready to throw Sutton under the bus.

And so she's like, Rina, yes, Kyle. According to other people, you said, get the fuck out of my house. And that's what I heard. And Sutton's like, Rina, yes, Kyle. According to other people, you said, get the fuck out of my house. And that's what I heard. And so I'm like, wow, great way to have this conversation. Okay, in front of homeless toothless people, no offense girl left, you didn't have that. Yeah.

And so, Rina's like, I did not take out the fuck out. And so I'm like, yes, you did. Yes, you did motherfucker. And Marisa was like, well, I wasn't even there, but I know that you said it. So, hey, pretty muscular, bro. Happy cake and getting some nice biceps there, huh? By the way, she's already yelling, Rina.

She's going, I didn't say, you're the fuck up. Oh, here we go. Rina's just, this is where Rina's just going to start yelling about nothing, right? So, suddenly I was like, yes, you did. No, I didn't. Yes, you did. No, I didn't. So then, Rina's just going to start yelling about nothing, right? So it sounds like yes, you did. No, I didn't. Yes, you did. No, I didn't. So then Rina's like, well, I must have been frustrated with you then because I don't remember saying the word fuck. Was it brutal? And Garth says like, yeah.

Well, it was when I said that you were speaking out of both sides of your mouth, just in case you want to go back there. If you need to refresh your course, roll the clip Bravo. Now you don't want to. Okay. So then, Marina's like, well, who would like that? And so I go, well, you didn't like that. And I was like, well, I think that our issue could be put to bed. And Marina says like, I don't think your issue would have to be put to bed. Ha, ha, ha, ha gets a spoon and she starts like using her spoon as a prop.

She's like the fact that you didn't go up and apologize when you had a chance to my husband, Harry Hamlin. Okay. Well, he was leading a wine tasting. No one cares about appeasing the fuck boy from LA law except you. I don't know why that's a rule on every episode of this. Like what is Harry gonna think nobody cares Why are you bringing Harry into every fight also Harry does not have your back because he was on watch what happens

Life saying he never got mad about the tomato sauce in the first place. That's true Let's call Harry in if we're gonna get if we're gonna bring Harry into every conversation get his ass on FaceTime Rin is probably throwing bricks through Susan Dei's window so get his ass on FaceTime. Rina is probably throwing bricks through Susan Day's window. I apologize to my husband. So, so Sutton is like, she's like, you know, like, you know, by the way, I fucked up and I sent Harry a very thoughtful text message that goes as follows. And Rina of course is like, no, you didn't just, yes, I did, here it is. So she goes, happy birthday, Harry. Thank you again for including me last night at your mother fucking wife's event for you.

Okay? Wanting to keep the evening about celebrating you, I did not have a chance to express my apology for causing any embarrassment about the fact that you guys did not pay for your table. This was never my intent. Sometimes miscommunication amongst people who do not pay for their bills can wreak havoc. So with sincerity, Sutton, with a kissy cat face and a heart followed by a money bag sign and then a finger pointing at you, like you owe money.

Now, you got to have it to Sutton because Rina, the what starts is Rina is screaming, you should have gone up to him and said, by the way, by the way, but because that just doesn't take it. She just keeps talking and then she gets her fork and starts using it as a mic. It's just, I thought, why I didn't say the dance. Like, good for you because Rina kind of gets that. She does that thing where she just starts yelling one phrase over and over until you break. And Sutton does not break and she doesn't get upset at all. She's just like and she just puts on her little readers from CVS, you know, she's like, I have receipts. These are my receipts readers and she just goes to town on it. So well done. Meanwhile, she finishes this and Kyle

just weeks it the crowd and smiles like hey my greatest tips guys everybody enjoy that Yeah, so when I was like if you want to make this go away you make it a public apology and you say I'm so sorry I did that son why did you do it in the first place? Well, I did you do it in the first place and son me while talking over her and she's like oh Lee says real book. Let me see does she do what she says and then it goes away It's a very short book everyone and she was like, oh, Lee says real book. Let me see. Does she do what she says? And then it goes away. It's a very short book everyone. And Chris was like, I mean, there's other people here,

like my friends who were like freaking out and texting me, like, what the fuck is going on? And then the assistant comes over the party planner, it's like, we really need to get the show going. She's ready. And suddenly, that's so yelling. And so yelling and sounds like I did it because you went after Gorsal for the bowling nays and it's like

Why is that you're freaking problem and not her fucking problem? And Gorsal's like first of all there are people here you got and Rina is just screaming and yelling now. What made you do that? That's the answer I want. And when I get it, I will let it the fucking go. Okay, Rina, you're drunk. You can't. Yeah. For instance, properly. And you were so drunk last time that you couldn't even remember what you said. And then you're bragging in that episode about telling off Erica for how drunk she was. Okay, the system cast just needs to go get some help at this point. Yeah, Crystal's like, oh my god, oh my god, she's being crazy.

Look at all my, these, everyone's texting me. Well, it's really just, I wouldn't say I'm getting 14 messages, but I'm definitely getting one message. So, she's like, to read, say, hold on, boys, boys, boys, boys, hold on, hold on. And when it's like, if you're gonna make me do this across table, how do it across a table? Well, which is where she would normally do it anyway.

So, Drewy's like, oh, boys, put the pin in it for just one second. Sharon Stone was less frightening with an ice pick and a hoo-ha. Can I just have a sliver of your attention? That was a reference to my good friend, Sharon Stone, who's watching on his live a canvas. So she was, who started this?

And so, and Garsell go, Kyle. And Kyle just shrugs and starts cackling. Yeah, she's like, oh, I just wanted to know if there are still issues between Ruth and Sutton. And like, are they okay right now? Are they swooping it under the rug again? That's fine if you want to know that, but like maybe not the charity dinner.

And Rinna starts waving her spoon around. She's going, Kyle, fuck you, Kyle. And she's like, well, I mean, I want to them are to have the discussion, but it's becoming really uncomfortable now. So like it's not an absolute animal, but we could be getting there.

And we see clips of, don't you ever talk about the husband. So now it's time for the special guest. And so PK has his remote and he's supposed to be lowering the lights. But of course, does the exact opposite. He raises the lights to maximum brightness and all of a sudden, like all the ladies turn into like old trees. And the Kyle is like, great, thanks for his lighting on National TV. I'm time to go party's over. So the lights go down. Doreet's like, I told you PK. I told you you don't know how to do it.

PK. This is not a kind of Pringles. It's not simple. And then the lights go down and she comes out on stage and I was like, oh, noher's really let himself go. So it's Melissa, it's Ethridge. It's Melissa, it's a fucking Ethridge, yeah. So, this is my girl crush. This is my girl crush.

It's also, it's the battle of the who can be more impressed for the cameras. So Kyle's like, oh my God, you are lying to me. You are like, well, there's an average. I'm like, I guaranteed everyone be normal. People would be like, Oh, cool. Cool. Well, Kathy's like, so was dash or hiding under the table the whole time? Oh, it's good to see that Kuma's playing guitar now. So this after starts her famous balance, she's like, and Riddah starts dancing like this.

She starts dancing to the wrong rhythm. Like it's like some dance hall number in, you know, 1950s Cuba. She took my side story basically. And I just show everyone just smiling and clapping. I mean, they even like showed Dwight being like, feels great to be back. I'm most at the rich night. I know. And you know, we all just kept looking at Erica waiting for the come to my porn search. So come on my window. That was my porn search. So Garsell's only son, you should go take a picture with her. Come on, take a picture. And I'm like, after I just yelled like that, such not a lady not knowing that Melissa ethbridge was upstairs listening to that. Yeah Melissa ethbridge has heard the yelling

okay. She was married to that crazy girl from popular. Yeah she's fine. Yeah so they all get a picture and then PK of course takes them I can give us a speech longer than the song He's like it's an honor to have an icon like this me basically. You're welcome Melissa Listen, I work closely with a Primary wave and they manage Melissa and when she agreed to come I said to read Melissa will be at our House we're taking we're talking two-time Grammy award-winning at all house. We're talking two-time Grammy award-winning Melissa. It just goes to show you, no matter how fucking famous you are, you're a dancing monkey at the end of the day. The fact that Melissa etharaj had to show up to fucking PK's house. You know she went home and just like crashed into barriers

all the way home. She was probably, well she was probably just like waiting, she was like, I heard Sharon so it was gonna be here. But you know, like also, such a, like, I also is like no matter how famous you are, there's always gonna be someone who's gonna still try to like, like, take your moment and build off of it because, A, this speech didn't, all the speech was saying like, yeah, I got Melissa at the edge. Like there was no point in the speech. So I can of all,

PK did not need to get on the mic. Why was PK on the microphone? Like with the room was there was 14 people in the room and you're standing right in front of me, he's like, hey, hi, everyone. So, uh, now, it feels like I'm at the Greek theater again with boy, Ron. I'm

like, why are you doing this, PK? So Melissa, after it leaves, you know, and unfortunately her pride is left on the welcome mat. So she's gone. And then they all go back to the dinner table and PK is like, you can start all you can get now. Now here's the funny thing. Rana always knows how to pivot, right? So Rana has just made a complete ass out of herself. She screamed in the elder friend of Melissa Athe Ridge. She was wrong because Sutton proved her wrong by proving that she sent Harriet text. She looks like an asshole. So what is she gonna do? Here comes the victimhood. Bring it on. Ding ding ding. Victim bell. Victim's approaching.

Well, Sutton's like, well, no, I'm not even mad at you anymore. Now that I heard that wonderful song about windows, and I'm just like, who cares? I'm sorry, let's move on. So I was like, what do you want from me? What, how can I help? But she's, we're done. I don't want to have to do this with you anymore.

You know, my mom's stuff came to me today. It arrived. And so I was like, well, now let's just like, I was like, well now let's just say, I can't do this anymore. I can't do this. So now it's segues into Rina. Well, by the way, this pain I do, I believe this is very real fresh pain. I actually believe 100% that a lot of Rina...

Oh, yeah. So your mom dies. Your mom dies, it's pain. I'm not saying it's not. But like, but what I did find amusing in this was that the way, this scene, I actually felt like it was a very real moment for a Rina, but I also love in her realist moments.

She also is such a soap actress. Like that's how she expresses realness through soap opera language, which I think is kind of amazing. Yeah, so Sutton's, she's like, you know, we're gonna let this go now because I have anger and feelings. I've had a lot of things in my life.

And Sutton's like, you can put them all me. Just put them all me. She's like, I'm gonna eat the best I can. And then she starts this mom thing, but then she starts this like, oh, oh, but there's no tears coming from the sob and then so she starts doing the lamb breath. I guess she's trying to hold her breath to start real tears. I don't know what's going on but she starts doing this like I was like okay you know what

please just end this soon okay because this is. Like your mom dying is a real thing, but to use it like that, like to weaponize it after just treating somebody like that, again, is... What? I thought it was funny the way it's sudden. The way it's like, oh, it's fine. You blame me. You can blame me.

I can take it. I can take it. I'm like, you cannot take it, Sutton. So all of a sudden, Sutton, when she knows it's safe, is like the martyr. Oh, it's fine. Just putting on me and take it. I am fine with it.

It's like you are literally the worst person to take on any of this stuff, sudden. So when it's like, I'm so sorry to be doing this in public. America's like, how listen, honey? There was only one Jackie Hull. Do it in public if you know you do. And she's like, oh, so they go through this whole thing about how This is all because Rina is going through a real hard time and she doesn't even care about this stuff with Sutton and

Then her lash comes off which lightens the mood because they all start cracking up and they're like, oh my god Don't let Jamie Lee Curtis fix it Gee, is she back to Shea? And more gadgets and I just need support and I may act out and do shitty things, but I'm in pain. So, uh, they're all like leave it to more leverage, you know, and then, um, we get a thing, like a black, it goes to black and then we get a special message. It's like, for information about dealing with having to do the splits every time you go to

a party because of a disorder, please call 1-800-Kyle Richards. And that brings us to the end of Beverly Hills, everybody. Thank you so much for being with us. Thank you for being with us. Thanks for being with us on demand. We'll talk to you next time. Bye everyone. Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King.

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