Watch What Crappens - #2180 RHOSLC Part One: Apres Tea

Episode Date: October 5, 2023

This is Part One of a Two Part Recap! *Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* Real Housewives of Salt Lake City shows us what’s under Meredith and Lisa’s faces and comes out with what’s really behind these wumorz aboud tha huzzzband at the Apres Vida party. This week's bonus episode is about failed food and reboot recipes, respectively. Get all our video recaps and bonuses at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I've been so much more happy than I've ever been. Hello and welcome to Watch For Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the wonderful and beautiful Mr. Ronnie Karen fresh from a private jet with Snoop Dogg. Hi Ronnie, how are you? Hi, what's going on with you baby? Not much just riding the usual high that comes after watching another Daringed episode

of Real House of of Salt Lake City. What's going on with you? Same girl, same. I mean, pretty impressive that they can keep this up. I figured it would just start sucking, but it has that. No, no, no, it's a good season. It's officially a good season.

This episode had everything. It had a fight about a PJ with Snoop Dogg. It had gay rumors. It had crazy sunglasses. It's just really all I could ever want. So anyway, thanks everyone who came to Crapy Hour this week. It was super, super fun. That episode is now the audio from the episode is now on our feed, except for the part where we called people to the stage. So if you want to be someone who participates, if you want to be someone who participates in it,

if you want to come participate in crap the hour, it's every other week on Mondays at 8.30 on the East Coast. So it will not be this coming week, but it'll be the week after that. Next week will be dwell hello. So it'll be super fun. So go check that out on our Instagram. You should follow us. Watch what crap ends at Instagram at Ronnie Caram at Ben Mandelker. Follow all three. Also this is

a video. It's on Patreon. Patreon.com slash watch what crap ends support on the crap is on demand level and you get access to these videos. And then also a video that you definitely will want access to is the real housewives of Beverly Hills trailer. We are going to do a trailer breakdown this week on the bonus episode. And it's going to be video two. And what we like to do is you we actually watch the video and you guys can see us watching the video. And then we break it all down frame by frame shot by shot. So come join us for that. It's always super fun when that happens. And we also have a Potomac trailer

that's also coming down the pike. So I mean, it's already arrived, but like a trailer breakdown. So lots of fun stuff. And now let's dive into Salt Lake City, Ronnie, shall we? Yes, here we go. Some Salt Lake City action. We don't know what's going on,

but they like starting us with a lot of drama lately on this show, at least the drama haaz. So this one we get in my song, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, was and she's like, I'm still kind of just like what went on. I'm being like, oh really? And he actually said, which I can't believe it. Oh, no, he goes, whoa, Nelly, it's like really at the beginning of a gay outing episode. Is this purposeful? It was actually synergy because Shina Yastra posted a photo of herself with Nelly with Nelly. Yeah, I didn't know if it was a Shina reference or if they were just trying to bookmark

the show with Nelly's or bookend the shows with Nelly's. Maybe Nelly Furtado should join the cast of one of these shows. So Meredith is like, well, we got to tricksy motel. Not only is Whitney already there with Angie, who is not invited at dinner, she just unleashes on man. I love that Meredith is just going to stick with the dollar references every time she talks about. Meredith is just gonna stick with the dollar preferences every time she talks about. I know this shit. I feel like something that I've really learned over the past few years is like how we are not

meant to be calling women dogs. That is like a very, very, very like unhelpful, unhealthy yada yada. But this show they're like, no, we're gonna lean into it. Well, I think if you're a woman, you're allowed. We're allowed to. Maybe. Maybe that's what it is, but you know, we've learned over time, but yeah, I guess they're allowed to.

Like a dog is allowed to call another dog a bitch, but we're not supposed to do it. Yeah, we're not like supposed to be like, you yappy chihuahua, things like that, because it's like very offensive. Um, they're showing it like that because it's like very offensive But they show them like sure. Let's actually we'll lean in. Yeah So then we get a clip again because we're gonna get this clip probably every episode from now on we get another clip up So good every single time and then marthikas I felt overwhelmed by everything So Lisa lost her ring in the bathroom and the airport It was six you know, it was six feet grant it was six feet rest six feet came I ring six feet

K. I lost a six feet K being That's Lisa literally just walking through the restaurant while Seth and Meredith have their meal. Just in case they don't play a flashback during this part, I just wanted everyone to know I lost my ring and it was 60g. I heard that. Hey, by the way, this is my face. Oh!

Well, she and Monica had a little disagreement and Angie's behavior was relentless and they cut to you look like a trampoline with eyes They're like listen, it's not listen. We're not like we cannot call other women dogs However trampolines So, I'm not sure if I can tell you that right now. So, then we go to, we come back and we're just like, there are only ringers out there about Angie that I've heard. And it's just like, what the freak is the rumor with Angie K? And she goes, well, I just think it's somewhat ironic that this woman is trying to tear into me

and then thinks that karma is not gonna be served her. It's kind of like when a little baby toddler Brooks has a tantrum and then still expects the airport to come into the hangar, am I right? We get a clip of it. You know what I mean? They go through the junkular and talk about what you want me to go with love. We're gonna talk about husband. She says her husband, but her, the,

the her is so small that every time it always sounds to me like, you want to talk about husband, you want to talk about husband? You want to know about husband? And I don't know that like really amuses me. Um, every week I also love this line. I'm on a mission to serve Lisa. And I love that for myself. Okay.

So here we are, Temple Square and Lisa's going into the Mint Facial Bar. And, um, she's meeting Meredith to get some face stuff done. This is terrifying. First of all, Lisa's not really had a good time with face shots on this show. So last week, we were not even really paying attention to the picture that was posted with our episode. It was Lisa in a makeup chair and it was during the drag episode

and we didn't really pay attention. We were like, okay, fine, post it. And then later, I was like, whenever there's a ton of comments on the Instagram on watch what crap ends, I'm terrified. Or my personal one. If you see over 100 comments on something, you know you fucked up something.

You know, like you said something offensive, they're coming, you know, they're coming, Ronnie know? Like something offensive, they're coming, you know, they're coming, Ronnie. And I looked at it and people like, how could you? How could you say anything about Lisa? And I was like, we didn't say anything about Lisa's face. Like I didn't even notice, okay? I'm an old person.

I don't notice wrinkles except my own. That's not something I look to make fun of on people. But people got very offended that it was Lisa's picture posted with her side of her hair up and it shows that she has some wrinkles on her face. Is anybody surprised that anybody has wrinkles? These are shows about 50, 60-year-old people. Why is anybody surprised? And why are you being mean about wrinkles on your face? A lot of you I see out there, you've got wrinkles too. And if you don't have wrinkles, it's because you're like me and you're scrubbing that shit off or you're going to the Botox lady for it. I don't know. I'm going to get the shaming about wrinkles, shaming about something else, you know? Yeah. Listen, it's not called

a smooth face in time, okay? Yeah, respect the wrinkles. Now, is that hypocritical? Because I am yelling about a thing that was posted on our our very own Instagram. Yes, I am, but we really didn't notice it that way. And we did not mean to be like, oh my God, so many. No, it's not. It's not a commonplace of wrinkle shaming. But that said, poor Lisa just can't get away because the editors were shady to put that in there. I think probably because she yelled at everybody about my face. That's my face. So they put that in there. And this week, they are doing a, what did we even call these? Like black light scant, it looks like in military movies

where they're like, are there terrorists in that building? And then they put heat sensors on. And they look, they look through the heat sensors. And they're like, I see a terrorist. That is definitely the heat sensor of a terrorist. It's a heat sensor, and they're like, I see a terrorist. That is definitely the heat sensor of a terrorist. It's a heat mark. It was definitely like zero dark 30 on these ladies faces. They're like, I think that's all up in Lotton's

and your cheek, you know? Yeah. But yeah, it was, I'd also kind of, like, right here in Los Angeles, there are a lot of these posters going up for the new exercise movie. And all I'm saying is that these scans, I was like, is this just cross promotion for the exercise right now?

What is happening here? So these ladies, they show up and they're all like, it shows you what's under your own face. Who does that to themselves? Also, who does that on TV? I don't need to see that. It's God only knows what my face looks like. God only knows, you know that there's a Milton Borl under here

Everybody fucking knows it. I Don't think that Lisa and Meredith knew what they were getting into. No, it's like half the places they go to are just like free Right, like I can't only imagine how many mediocre meals they've all had so remember that last season It was two years ago. I think maybe it was last season where they like every restaurant they went to at the same chef it was like it was last season where they, like, every restaurant they went to at the same chef. It was like, it was like, like, bonafu-chini or something like that. And there was the guy. And like, oh, here you are.

And then it was like, siesta. And then he was like, there with like a mustache on. Like, wait, that's the same chef. So, so Lisa, yeah. So she's like, hi. How are you? And Marit is like, Hi, how are you? And Meredith is like, Hi, how are you? Because she's like nice to her now.

Well, she's like the Meredith mice voice, right? We're saying, Hi, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's good to see you. Actually, when Meredith's being nice, she doesn't move, she doesn't open her teeth. She's like, like normally people grit their teeth when they hate people,

but she actually grits her teeth when she likes someone. She's like, like normally people grit their teeth when they hate people, but she actually grits her teeth when she likes someone. She's like, it's so good, just, you know. So then, she's like, well, I've been sleeping a lot. I was tired and I was so happy. I'm so happy that work, and it's major, isn't it major? And like, yeah, I love that. And they love it.

We should do hugs. So the facial lady comes over and she's like, hi, you ladies. If you ladies will follow me, I'll scan you ladies into our system and you ladies. I'll get a you ladies treatment. You ladies plan you ladies. I was like, I'm going to smack.

If I was there, I would have thrown my person this lady's head for calling me you ladies over and over again. Is that supposed to be non-offensive? It's very offensive. Okay. You ladies. You just serve me right now. Just serve me. Do it. So Meredith's like, oh my God, my spring tan is awful. Look at how blotchy it is. And then she says that she went to a place in Park City. And I don't think they even say it's name. But these are like, oh my God. I'm bond from them. Yeah.

The girl wouldn't even let me tan because like I went in and they's like, oh my God, I'm bond from them. Yeah, the girl wouldn't even let me tan because I went in and they were like, because I was like, I have an event tomorrow and I was like, I need a ton. And they were like saying, well, we're closing in 30 minutes and I was like, but let me tan. And they were like, no, and I was like, but let me tan. And they were like, no, and I was like, but let me tan.

And they were like, no, I like escalated. And then they like, wouldn't even let me fucking tan. She said that the lady at the tanning sub place escalated it. I was like, no, you escalated it by standing there and yelling at the lady. You were the one escalating it, ma'am. The kitchen is closed. The chemical kitchen is closed. Yeah, it's closed. You shouldn't come there half an hour before they close, ma'am. She's like, yeah, and then I got an email from corporate that was like, we appreciate your eight years of patronage

Boomer consling your membership and John was like oh my god, I have to consult her now That's hilarious. That was terrible It was a her if it was hilarious also by the way John should have canceled a long time ago because Like he literally you could stand by a mountain on this show and he would disappear Like I don't see it if he's ever had a fake tan. I have not No, he does. Yeah, he does. I think that he looks like an usher painting Normally like before he might at least are those of pale people usher paintings. Oh, let me look like for sure I sure gonna make love in the standings alone

You remind me of a Diacchurch that I once knew MC Esher But you know what it turns out there are a lot of paintings of us sure just in case anybody We'll have time before my or sure Who am I trying to think about? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Think about, think about Lisa Barlow in 2004, singing along to yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I think Lisa was more of a boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, yeah. Whoa. Bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, yeah. Whoa. Now I'm looking at paintings of very pale people. What, who am I thinking of? It does kind of those.

Super pale people. I would say every single painter from 1401 to 1873. Okay, who painted George Washington? Because this is a pretty pale painting. He does have rosy cheeks. Ah! Ha! Ha!

George Washington was also bond from Park City, Tannen. Ha! George Washington? Try to escalate it. He got a letter from corporate, saying, I'm sorry. Thank you for starting this country, but unfortunately we cannot continue our membership at this time. I got an email from corporate, saying, I'm sorry. Thank you for starting this country, but unfortunately, we cannot continue our membership at this time. I got to email from corporate and they were like, Hey, if you want to talk to me, talk

to the back of a dollar bell. I was like, okay, George Washington. So he actually was kicked out. Pale painter is your thinking of, is it like Rubin? I don't know. No, he painted big ladies, right? Big people. Was it big ladies? Well, big ladies can be pale. No. But the defining factor was the paleness, not the, not the, but I don't, I don't feel like the, yeah, I feel like they were color, like color fault paintings

of big ladies, right? I don't think there were pale big ladies. I feel like all the ladies in his paintings are like, alabaster. You know, cause there was like, Oh my gosh. There his paintings are like, alabaster. You know, because I like to look. Oh my gosh. There was sort of like, flopping over on something.

That's just like the way those paintings are. Whether it's Rubin or not, like it could be anyone. It's like, oh look, it's like a naked lady flopping over in nature, you know. Or was it, Bata Cheli, Venus, Earth of Venus?

Wasn't he a sculptor? That shell hot to... Shall we? Did you see my new shell? No, it was his sculpture. Venus is like... I don't even know why I bring up. He does have some pale people in his art. I will say that.

Venus is like... The other day, I went to the mall and I got myself a seashell because I just wanted to sit in. And I bought it. No. And so, okay, let's go back to this show and I who cares. So the ladies, like, oh my God, I'm gonna scan you in my ladies. So then we, yeah, we hear the spray pan, the spray pan,

the spray pan thing. And so this is when she's like, okay, you ladies, insert, let's insert your faces into this machine. Now you ladies, it's called a you ladies machine, you ladies. So they do it. And meridus pictures are like slight sun damage. I guess it, you know, it's like maybe like little splotches of terrorism.

It's like terrorist, maybe spread over a map, but they haven't learned that there's other terrorists in the area yet. And so they're just, I don't think you would even call them terrorists. I just think you would say, oh, it's like people in a park that haven't met each other yet. But then when it gets to Lisa's face, it's like, oh my god, someone put a flyer up saying, you want to be a terrorist? And now they're all. Right. Joel Egerton is like definitely launching

a secret mission to invade her forehead at this moment. Yeah. And that's really scary what lurks under because you would never be able to tell this just looking at Lisa, you know? But it does look like a horror movie where there's like the witch living underneath. And this is what she looks like. You know when you pass the movie poster, they have those futuristic ones where you pass it and it's like a little girl.

But then you pass it a little more and you look and it's like a skeleton face with scary eyes. It's like that. Right, yeah. It's also very similar to looking at a college or a transinstagram. So I was, so then they're like looking, they're looking, they're like,

hey everybody stop wrinkles saving. I'm not even gonna be. No, I'm just saying it's like, Kyle or transinstagram sometimes can be very scary. That's all. I'm not saying that she looks Kyle, which was in-screw, I'm sometimes going to be very scary. That's all. I'm not saying that she looks like a little girl and sometimes a monster. She's just saying she's scary as a force of nature.

Okay, so she looks like a day of the dead skeleton. This is what I wrote in the blue. In the blue. Not her, her scan. Avatar, Avatar of the dead. Yeah. Like if Avatar was a horror movie. They're like the dead avatars are coming back now to kill the living avatars long.

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the same day. So, Lisa is like, this machine is just rude, but now Lisa has a new interview look. She has a new interview look. She basically has an Erica Jane look, but the Lisa Barlow version of an Erica Jane look. Because her hair is all of a sudden very high, but flowing down at the same time. So they start their facials and Lisa is like, you know what's not smart of? Like when I met you, Chloe wasn't even bot-mits-foot-yot. And like Brooke was just starting high school.

And it's like nuts that they're like out of the house now. Like you guys are true empty nesters. Yes, that's actually true. We adopted a dog named Drifus, and Joe Susu comes over. And yeah, we've also been contacted by CPS because they said, what are you doing? Have a toddler that's out of the house.

It needs to be under a don't supervision. It's really messed up. And the ladies like you ladies, I think that an exfoliation might be beneficial to you ladies today. Lisa's like, really do have a blowtorch. Just take off my whole fucking face

and replace it with a Gordita shell. Like I can't even believe you just showed me that in real life. Anyway married up You know what's gonna be so hard? It's like been jackals on a mash on because like he could be said to any But every can't see him and I'm like oh my god. I cry every day. I cry every day to my extremely pale skin to my extremely pale skin. Um, I really can't wait to find out where he gets sent to. It's probably maybe someplace fabulous. It's probably gonna be like niece or something. It'll probably just, he just can become a cast member on Below Deck.

And like your mission is to go onto a super yacht and clean things. So, um, I mean, it's not cold like make fun of the kids on the shows I know, but he comes off kind of douchey last year when he's like, I don't fudge college. Honestly, what do you say? Fudge college. He said fudge college.

He said fudge college. Honestly, I'm already rich because of my fresh wolf company. So then I was like, oh, I hope you're mission. You get sent somewhere not fun at all. I was gonna name something, but I'm like, what if somebody lives there? Now they're gonna be mad. So let's say...

Moscow, I think Moscow's safe at the moment. Hey, don't say that. We're not banded Moscow. Yeah, no, but meaning, I think Putin's sort of, I don't think anyone likes Putin, right? And let's see, right? What if's had an admission to the Kremlin? We've already discussed this, actually, very recently. So Mariah's got, wow, it's hard to see them, you know, it's hard, but seeing them move

forward as adults or in the case of my children, little babies in an adult world, wow, it's rewarding. I mean, when I saw Boss Baby, I never really resonated with something. I mean, it was a baby that talked like an adult, but it was still a baby. I mean, it was really a wonderful cinematic experience, you know, and I just think I did something right. Including wearing this denim jumpsuit, Aula Eileen from her season of Real House Waisen, I'll, I lean from her season of real house wise, some bad room, and he helps. Lee sung, you're getting your face scrubbed, eh? And she's a cat, feel so good.

This is why I'm taking my makeup off, are my ride. Huh? Huh? Are you crying? No, it's me laughing. Huh! And so, um, we get clips because she wants to talk about this girl's trip thing and we get a clip of this is my face!

Okay, that and you're crying in your, in your clip, right? Yeah, it was me crying in my clip. But this is me laughing about how funny that was. I am never dressing up for a girl's trip over icon, but I feel like things weren't even resolved and like pump sprangs, and there's so much weirdness. I mean, I'm specifically talking about my ring like I never found it, and she basically is like, hey, I'm gonna have an apri no ski party

to get everyone together, and there's not even a reason. There's a tenuous reason of we were fighting, so let's have a party to not fight, but we're probably gonna fight at the party. It's a Vita party, right? It's like some kind of Vita thing. Like, was it to watch the whiskey? Vita, was it their Vita whiskey at this party? I don't know, but it was something Vita, it was like,

opera Vita, and I was like, that means after Vita. Doesn't it? It was like after Vita. So that would mean afterlife, which would make sense with the scams they just took actually in this beauty shop. So anyone, the ladies, like, okay, you're both still horrifying.

You can leave now, you ladies. Okay, so then we go to Monica. Oh no, firstly, so talk about. I'm gonna invite Monica because it's just like ACR to invite her than not to invite her. And you know what? I'm like irritated with her, but I'm just gonna say I'm having a party. And you know what? I'm gonna wear labels from Mabitown just to see if I can get a reaction from her. Oh my god, please stop crying, please. And I'm still laughing. This is my LOL.

Rrrr. Eh, yeah, because she's like, I just, like, I'm, I'm gonna wear like labels and I'll be like, you're the one who's triggered, ha, ha, ha. And Meredith is like, I mean the two of you. So now we go to Monica arriving at eight settlers, distillery, which has got me excited here. Based on someone walking to Utah, to 100 years ago.

Like, is there literally a name that doesn't have to do with that of any place in this town? I was hoping that the stillery had something to do with having eight copies of Sellers' Catan, but maybe not. So Whitney joins Monica at a bar. And Monica's saying the girls, like her girls were good. She's like, fuck about her daughters, did really well while she was gone in Palm Springs, but she goes, but actually we lost our dog.

And I was like, oh, that's tragic. So that's what she meant, like the dog died. And then she's like, yeah, he got out while we're gone. And Whitney's like, oh, that's tragic. I thought she met like the dog died. And then she's like, yeah, he got out while we're gone. And when he's like, oh, no. Yeah, but we found him. Like, okay, well, it was just like an emotional journey very quickly. Like, yeah, our dog died of sadness

because he missed us, but he's okay. You're like, well, Monica, don't leave it. It's making some tragic. Yeah. She's like, yeah, actually, we must find dog because like, grrr but he's okay. You're like, well Monica, don't leave it. It's pretty. It's something that's making some tragic, yeah. She's like, yeah, actually, we must find dog because like, grrr, he got out way along with Garn, and they didn't want to tell me while I was away, but like, thank God for all those dog websites where you can post the e-smithing,

and we found him yesterday. It's like your kids didn't tell you the dog was gone, and they didn't get him back until you came back. This poor dog. Who's taking care of this dog? Okay, and I barely take care of my dog. Okay, my dog's toys are like, use water puddles. Okay, but even I take better care of my dog than that.

I mean, you sure you just didn't want to pay somebody to house sit your dog and you just let it out and then posted it on face, because I think people do that in my neighborhood. I think they're like, you know what because I think people do that in my neighborhood. I think they're like, you know what? I'm leaving town for a few days. I don't want to pay the $50 a day to somebody to take care of this dog.

Just room free, Fido. And then they come back and they're like, is anybody seen my dog? It was probably a very, it's amazing they found the dog because they probably were not allowed to yell out for the dog because they're probably like Fido Fido and Nana's like not so loud So uh wouldn't you guys are better with Nana than you were with the dog Nana ever gets at you still not gonna call Monica on vacation Call your mom the dog's missing Nana's fine. She has that knife. She's gonna be walking the molding. It's like, you come at me.

Come at me, bro. Quiet. Not so loud, huh? Not so loud. So Whitney, I just, we don't often talk about when they order on the show, but I really laughed watching Whitney trying to order a pair in Barata salad

because she's like, I'm gonna have a pear and a rata salad with chicken. Please, I'm like spit it out, just get a Barata salad, that's all you have to say. So they start talking like, how are you and Lisa doing Monica? And she's like, she's having her fun little skima. And I'm gonna go. So I mean, I think we're okay. Brian, if she invited me to her thing, I'm going to go. So that's great. Because like, maybe now you can like clear

the air if you want. Because I'm, do you think I need to clear the air? Just while I'm giving you a fair warning, it took me three years to get back into her good graces. And then Mark is like, well, I mean girl, I'll just be like your material sick fatty daddy, but I love you I have what news like I wouldn't say it like that and I have to be honest I'm like we have a lot in common like I love your energy your vibe and a lot in common. Like I love your energy, your vibe, and the trip made me pause for a second. And Mark was like, why girl? She's like, yeah, you know, you've got a good vibe. I've got a good vibe. We can both take those facial scan things and not look like the cover of Insidious. That's fine. And when he's like, because there was like a little bit of a red flag for me,

cause like you were going after Lisa and Angie, and like I don't wanna invest in someone that goes for their friends like that. Literally Whitney who does it to every single person is about to in this episode. My God. Yeah, she is the worst. Samonika, Monica is from the Danielle

from Summer House School of Friendship, where she goes, if you're a friend acting like crazy girl, like you should call them out. Like you're doing to me right now. So like the same thing I did to Angie. I'm like, I think Mary the handle is great. And I feel like Angie said some like really her own things about her business. And like, that's what set me off. Like you know how hard it is.

Like you have a business. You have, you have a business, right? Like you have a quote unquote business at least. and then we get another classic anti-mind. What are you gonna write a check for? Mary death your jewelry that's got cop-ups and dust and you haven't told something since 2015 So what he's like so So does Angie has business? Monika's like, Oh, imagine like how she would feel it like someone just like all of a sudden said like some stuff about her business.

You can hear it when he's like, but from my perspective, it looked like you went against your chief friends and then you were sucking up to Meredith and Heather. And Whitney's like coming and doing that like, I just said something really intense. Look that she does, or she's... Her eyes are wide open, but also squinting in a way. And her top lip kind of shakes. And they're playing horror music, by the way.

Look at Whitney standing up for someone. It's like the energy with me. Just seemed like a huge flip Yeah, what they said Some other cuz like I stand by what I said and when he goes I sense that you're getting defensive Like I don't want you to explain yourself I'm just like well, I feel like it defensive like I don't want you to explain yourself. I was just like well I feel like I'm explaining myself girl but like maybe you're like not used to dealing with someone like me. I'm sorry. What was that word? Dealing? What? Dealing? Oh, dealing. Yeah. I'm not. Wow. Was that your bad linguist? So Monica's basically like I feel like Angie was out of line and as her friend, you know,

I told her like, and I had a conversation with her and I told her this and I said, Angie, I'm going to call you out when I feel like you're digging yourself into a hole. Yeah, well, thanks for hearing me out because I was like, damn, this is how we're going to do friendships now. Okay. She didn't apologize and she didn't say she was wrong. So why are you acting like you just made some kind of a point? I'm on a good side. Um, yeah. Well, thank you for coming to me about it. Don't because I feel like Marinette needed someone to like have her back in that moment and then it goes, don't and wait and just get that mortified look on her face again. And I should say, wait a minute, I'm trying to be your friend in this scene,

but you just keep flopping to the wrong side. Okay, just be careful. Be careful with Meredith. Just be careful. Just be careful. Hey, just be careful. Oh, what are you talking about? Just be careful.

Cause here's the thing, Meredith pulled me over at the airport and was like, you should know, be warned, you should think someone should tell you. I forgot the rest, but it was bad. It was really, really bad. It was something about Angie. But like, did you do it like in like a nice way or was it like sort of like, like a It was really, really bad. It was something about Angie. But did she do it like in a nice way? Or was it like sort of like, hey girl, be careful girl. No, she got her really serious eye out like this.

She doesn't really get better. She does a pirate impersonation with her face. Am I eyed laughing? It was so funny. Because that is what Merit does. Like, I have got something to tell you. Argg. So, I was like, oh my god.

And what he's like, this is what she always does. She's like, I have all the information. She does it to every single one of us. She'll do it to you too. And you know what? And I've learned that when she does it to me, I just repeat what she says and make it bigger and then get mad when I get in trouble for it.

Damn it. Whenever Meredith fails wronged, all the sudden a rumor gets its wings. And then we see Meredith clips, like classic Meredith clips. You want today one of my friends mentioned something about Jim, which is that she is right-fanged at Louis Vuitton in the system because she pays for bags and can't show them. I don't know if that's true or if that's false. I don't know if you guys all know this, but Lisa Barlow has been having 45 different affairs

around Salt Lake City, most of them with corporate executives at the Utah Jazz, but you didn't hurt for me. So we cut back to Whitney and Whitney's like, Whitney's trying to do one of her drag queen written lines. Well, see if she can pull it off. She's like, why can't she just have a normal hobby? Like go to yoga or like collect trinkets. Or like bird watch. So when you, when you're like, I'm so sick of this bullshit

toxic behavior from Meredith it has to stop we can't live Under this horrific rain anymore. I say Meredith marks Take down this wall Oh my god, wait me like with me would ever know that I know I have a cold war in my house every day because Justin hates turning the heat,

the temperature that I like to have. It's crazy. Sometimes Justin leaves the cheese outside of the refrigerator. I'm like, oh my God, we're about to have another cold war. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha. So Monica's like, well, I mean, we've all heard stuff about each other when he goes, it doesn't make it true.

Even though I spent last season making, making a whole fight about these sabarra giving blow jobs for tickets for a basketball game. I'm out of good girls. Okay, well, I'm sure. And so they do tell Angie that she said that. And she's like, no, I haven't seen Angie yet And honestly, I do not want to get involved in the Meredith Angie thing And that's why I'm telling you because you're gonna take it and then you're gonna get involved with it

And I'm gonna have clean him. Did I just say all of that out that? Yeah, and she's like, um, are you scared of Mary? She goes, no, I'm not scared of Meredith at all. But when she comes to town, I make sure to close up all my shutters and hide into a closet. I just don't like this repeated cycle that she gets on. And Monica's like, well, I think that Angie and Meredith have something deeper than any of us understand. And I think it's really going to blow up. And I'm home on, um, wait a minute. Is that my dog outside the window? What is my dog doing here? Oh God. My kids really need to learn to text me. Now listen, uh, hold on one second. Um, this is real fun because guess what, Ronnie? I hit live on this. But I guess I didn't hit the second. This is real fun because guess what Ronnie, I hit live on this, but I guess I didn't

hit the second, like, are you sure you want to go live? So we're going to go live, right? We're going to go live right now for the rest of the recap, but the initial people, and I'm going to have this part cut out by Christina, but I'm going to hit it right now. Hello, and welcome to Watch For A Crappens. Well, guess what? I forgot to hit live for the first 25 minutes of this podcast. So if you want to hear what we talked about, it's on the regular podcast, but we still have all of the big episode going forward.

So apologies to everyone tuning in for Crap Son Demand for this, but we're going to now pick up where we left off in the podcast. We just had the scene where Whitney and Monica met to talk about Meredith. It's time for a crap and it's commercial. Now we go to Whitney at home, which is one of our favorite scenes that we'd love to have. Whitney at home, and so she goes in and she has a cake that's like a Superman Clark cake. So she walks in and Justin sees it and she's like, congratulations, Justin Rose. Dad is going back to work. He's like, congratulations, Justin Rose, dad is going back to work. He's like, don't drop it. And so of course we get like a flashback.

I'm not going to drop it. Like she gets all offended that he would say that. And then we see the flashback of Whitney dropping her cake. Yeah. Um, so I also love a sign in a show. You know, I love when they put little hints in for us. And this whole episode, they started with Wo Nelly and then they ended with a gay rumor about a husband. And then this one, or Whitney's acting so mortified that anybody would step outside their marriage

when, you know, I guess the word on the street is Whitney Rose and Justin could swing. They could. That's just a rumor that was out like season one, like a million years ago. I didn't say it. I just read it, don't sue me. But anyway, it's kind of that. And then we open the Whitney scene with the gigantic pineapple on the table, like just right in the middle of the table. So thank you, editors.

Thank you, you know that. I consider that a hug. Yeah. So Justin's like telling the kids like, hey, so you guys ready for me to go back to work? The kids are like, yeah, because we're sick of like cleaning up random chocolates syrup around the house. What is that anyway?

Where does that come from? Mom and daddy need to have a sex life. It's our king. Don't kink, shame us. So Whitney's like, yeah, when Justin lost his job last year, he had a one year non-compete. That means he can't work. That's actually not what that means No. No. He means he

can't he can't try out for Utah Jazz because he can't compete. Yeah, he can't compete. He wouldn't even play Uno with me. He was going to try out for Olympics, but he can't compete. So he missed his window. So she's like, Justin, how do you fell? And he's like, I don't know how I fell. And she's like, yeah, well, it's been one year. So not Justin can work again. No one's going to bother telling me what a non-compete clause means.

But okay, let's just keep it going. So we need to figure out a different routine because mom and dad are working full-time now. And Justin's like, yeah, I mean, I'm gonna, you know, mistaking you guys to school. It's just, you're still gonna be taken to school. He's like, well, okay, maybe taking them, but not picking them up. The little boys like, well, you'd be there to pick me up on me. Who are you? I'm your little boy. Are you sure? Have you always been part of this show? Because I feel like this is the first time we've seen you little boy. This little boy has been recast. I think this is a difference. I get that people grow up and change

looks and stuff, but this is a different little boy. This is, we've never seen this child before, ever. It's a different person. Whitney, you know, I think that Whitney should pick up the kids because she obviously is very concerned with safety because I do believe that a carpool situation was the crux of her falling out with Mary in season two because she didn't answer Mary's call because she was I was driving carpool and safety first. So we know she's a very reliable carpool because I was in the water. I was in a carpool. Justin wasn't allowed to get in because he has a non-compete. That means he can't drive for one year.

Like, no, he can't drive for one year. Like, no, he can't compete with other drivers on the road. Still not what that means. Well, my thing is with running two businesses and then Justin's not gonna be around, how are we gonna manage it? Cause like you go back to work and everything's on my head again, cleaning, laundry,

bird watching. head again cleaning laundry bird watching. Leave it up to Whitney to put things on her head instead of her shoulders everything's on my head again. She just has a task stacked up on her head. Whoa. I'm gonna get neck problems. I've got so much on my head. Like, are you just expecting me to be able to take it all on? Because that's the kind of vibe. Like, you're going back to the male dominating role again. She looks at him like, nail, just nail, nail, nail on that one. Why aren't you just complaining that Justin didn't have a job and you're having to be the breadwinner?

I mean, the guy, if you want the guy to work, I mean, what are you going to do? If you want him to have a job or not, get a fucking nanny for your children or somebody to take them to and from school. There are lots of two income families in the world. It's okay. Guys, welcome to the modern fucking world. I know. And so she goes, he goes, you knew I was going back to work.

Remember when I was filling out job applications and having interviews, you knew this was happening so I don't know where this breakdown is or why this is a surprise. She's like, but I just don't want us to go backwards. There's so much on my head. Bobby. Bobby is turning 13 and this is like the most critical age that our girl needs us the most what I'm saying is If our girls starts getting on drugs, it's your fault because you went back to work Yeah, I was just a 13 year old girl without present parents and that is my number one priority

and She's talking about how like there were bad things in her childhood and there was no one there to protect her from it. And she doesn't want to miss something huge. And she's like, our kids need us. And I also know you need your career. And I need my career too. So is what are what needs to to businesses that she has Whitney wrote. Like she has that, the skincare thing, the MLM, and then what's the other company? I don't even remember what the other company wrote. I think it's not an MLM now. I think she changed it all to like follow non-MLM rules whenever she came out with this

new Whitney Rose or Wild Rose or whatever. Yeah. I don't know what her other one is. Did she start another one? Because I think she says at some point that she has two businesses. Let's either way, I don't know Rose businesses. Let's see. Whitney Rose reveals her spiritual jewelry line.

According to the business's website, the line is passionate of it. My jewelry line is passionate about inspiring others to do the healing work. It takes to find peace and dot dot dot. Hold on. Let me open the Bravo website and then wait for 19 ads to play before I can read this article that isn't ad for their own programs. Makes a lot of sense. Um, I wonder if Whitney will be able to carve out the time in her busy making jewelry

day to pick up her kids from school. I had to stop the infinity symbol line to pick up my kids and now it's just not just a shave like a tear drop. So now we're going over. I just love that Justin's going back into corporate America and she has her sort of like vanity jewelry line and she's like, I don't know if I can pick up the kids. Like a lot of it sounds very patriarchal like, oh, whatever, silly jewelry line. But honestly, in this case, we know it's just a silly jewelry line. Well, it's a Whitney jewelry line. Okay, if you want to be assured that it's a silly jewelry line, listen to the instruction, I mean, listen to the description. I just pulled it out finally. According to the businesses website, which they also have a link for hold on. Let me open that in the background.

The line is passionate about inspiring others to do the healing work that it takes to find peace and alignment in their lives. And it also has products that are intentionally created for free thinking spiritual women who trust their intuition over everything. Prism your life. Join the prism collective and get 15% off your first order. And then you go to the website and it's Whitney with her head tilted just being like, why don't you get a hobby like bird watching. I just imagine someone going to the website like, oh, this is jewelry made for women who trust their intuition who are independent and free thinking, well, I'm not sure I trust my intuition. So I guess it's not for me. Like, of course, like, I just love it. It's like, who's gonna say that they're not those things?

Well, I love that she's talking about how this is like women in powerment and this is for free women only, but then you go to the website and literally the only thing she's showing her chains. Like a big giant chance. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh like a baby giant chance. Also, listen to the copy on this website. Spring Summer 2023, intentional jewelry for your spiritual ascension.

Intentional jewelry. The fuck does that even mean? Like jewelry, it's jewelry that's not also a house pet. I like unintentional jewelry. Like guess what, I bought this plate and I just I made it into a necklace. I'm on intended jewelry. No, I don't want to test drive a Volkswagen. I want to wear it around my neck. Could you just put that around my neck? Thank you. Excuse me. Can this can of fancy feast be out? Fit it's be a ring.

The next copy says rituals for your ascension. When you hell yourself, you hell the world. Come on. You're yourself. You heal the world. You know what there's a chat thing. I'm going to ask if I can speak with with me. Chat with us, message us with any questions. I'm going to ask if I can speak with Whitney. First. I'm going to chat with us, message with us with any questions. We're happy to help.

Okay. Hi. Is this what it's your job? I'm going to say hi. Oh, no, I have to fill out my first name, last name and email address. Fill it up, please. You have to feel your address. I feel well, God bless.

Okay. So back to this. So I guess she's very busy. She's intentional, guys. Okay. You know, you need to get intentional about picking your God damn kid up from school. Okay. Fifty-fifty.

That's what I say. When you heal yourself, you heal the world, but I'm not sure that the world being healed means your kids can still get home from school. So, let's heal some carpools. Yeah, it's not just about, oh yeah, she just talks about not being home and everything. And she's like, our kids need us. I know that you need your career and I need mine.

And Justin's like, so how does this work? Just kidding. You're going to pick them up. You're making, you're having someone else make you butterfly jewelry. So, yeah, you'll pick him up. So then we go to Angie who is at home with Electra and her husband. And by the way, Justin Case, nobody knows the style of this home. It's Greek. I'm Greek. I'm Greek every time. I am Opa. Opa. Opa. Opa. Opa. Let us play a game of Slapjack. How do you play Slapjack? And they're like, Mom, you keep putting cards and then you slap it. Which card do I slap? Why are none of these zoos? So by the end of this episode, we find out it's probably not the first time

Andrews had to slap a jack. This is also an attempt to pretend like there's some sort of warmth in this in this home. I'm not saying in the household, I'm not saying that there's no warmth in the marriage or the family, but like this house is just stark white. It is like if you've never white. It is like if you've never, if you've, if you've ever questioned whether or not or like if you've ever doubted when people say, love these housewives just run to house for shooting. And you said, no, that's not true. Look at Angie's house. It has not been lived in before. This is, there's like one tiny picture on a wall. And everything else is just stark, empty, cold, white. And they're sitting here trying to play this game of slap jack. Like, this is a warm family home. This is like home and hearth is here. And we are full of love in this very happy house.

Um, this isn't the same house that we saw last year that Jen used for her, her husband's birthday party member. And it was that big, gorgeous house. And then Angie's like, I paid for that entire party. And you didn't give me anything back to from the party. You are fake. So also the husband, listen, whatever we say about the husband for the rest of the episode, not a bright person, okay?

He's the one saying, all you have to do is slap a jack honey and then he slaps the Joker. Dun, dun, dun. So Angie's like, it's like, hey, Electra, this is like when you were little and I let you win, do you remember that? And then when I didn't let you win and then you cried?

It's like, you sound horrible. Dude, that's like some mommy dearest. After you. Have you, do you have any memories of your daughter? Is this the best you could do? So Angie's like, Sean and I have been a team since the day we met and we were together 24, seven. We love our careers.

We love traveling. We love going to share concerts and we laughed and had fun and it was always just the two of us But 12 years ago when a lecture was born there was something in life that was so much bigger than us Our relationship changed and now electrical gets all the love and attention and then we see the dad go to bed What's his face goes to bed and Anti gets in bed with her kid and just sits there and like brushes her hair and stares at her face. And she's like, you know, sometimes I am so focused on my daughter, I forget that I'm not only Greek,

but a wife. And Sean is sitting, he's in this enormous California king. Like this is like two California kings put together and like with like a, with like a sale enormous California king. Like this is like two California kings put together and like with like a sale as they are comforted over across it. It is huge and he's just sitting there alone with like the dog and he also by the way,

you can tell he's really self-conscious about his hair because he keeps his baseball cap on until the very, very, very last moment that he can keep it on. He's like, he's like in his pajamas in bed with a baseball cap backwards and then like very reluctantly he like takes it off of it some of the night too. He's like, he's like, in his pajamas in bed with a baseball cap backwards, and then like very reluctantly, he'd like, takes it off with some of the night tables. He's like, so fully closed, right?

Does he crawl into the bed like fully closed? Was he? Oh, he's so uncomfortable. He's like, can the cameras get the fuck out of my room? My God. What's in that? What's in that? What's in that?

What's in that? What's in that? What's in that? What's in that? What's in that? What's in that? What's in that? What's in that? What's in that? So Angie's like, I know my husband feels neglected and he would love more intimacy. It's just that right now it's been hard for me to give that to him. And I know I don't know how to fuck a fuck a fuck a sunshine and Angie and not just Opa and Opa.

Are you still there? She just suddenly turns into a bank of America website because that's what she sounds like. Or she's like an ATM. Are you still there. She just suddenly turns into a bank of America website because that's what she sounds like. Or she's like an ATM. Are you still there? Would you like another transaction? By the way, like this is all fine. They have an intimacy problems, whatever. What I wanna know, like I wanna see the side of Angie

where she is a, like a very intense horse mom because Electra has a wall of ribbons a very intense horse mom, because Electra has a wall of ribbons and like horse trophies. And you know Angie is like, you better get there and you have to compete in this question event. And if you do not win Electra, you are not being fed for three days. Like I wanna see that side of Angie.

Do you know what your father and I have sacrificed for you to write horses, a doctor. I don't care if you have a broken rib, you are on that horse. You are bringing home the bacon. She's like, uh, Electra, you're doing so great. You are beating mommy at horses. Just getting mommy beat you. Mommy's horse is bigger. Mommy's horse is stronger and mommy's horse will always win. Do you remember when you were in that equestrian event and you were two years older than all your competitors and you still lost? Do you remember how you cried that day and I laughed? Do you remember

Electra? Oh gosh. Hey everyone, we're going to pause this recap right here because it's going to be a two-parter. Thanks for listening and keep an eye out on your feed for part two coming up very shortly. Bye. Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take nobelone. Strong to park with Caitlyn Clark.

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