Watch What Crappens - #2191 RHONY Part One: Polly Want a Cackle?

Episode Date: October 16, 2023

Season Finale time for Real Housewives of New York City, where Brynn ruins her own birthday with a messy game and Sai gets mad cuz it’s her hobby. This week’s bonus episode is a Trailer Trash breakdown of Real Housewives of Potomac.Get all our video recaps and bonuses at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensWe're the longest running Bravo comedy recap podcast! Find us at https://www.watchwhatcrappens.comTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@watchwhatcrappensInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/watchwhatcrappens/Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/watch-what-crappens/id498130432See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I have cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cr Hey everybody, welcome to Watch What Crapins. This is a two-part episode. Enjoy. Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Crapins. It's the podcast roll that crap. We love to talk about on yield bros. I'm Ronnie. That's been over there. Hello, Ben. Hi Ronnie. How are you? Good. Welcome to Monday, my little friend. Thank you, thank you for having me. It's wonderful to be here. And from your childhood home, and in New York, yeah, I'm back in my childhood bedroom. If my audio sounds a little funky, I apologize.

This is the satellite office here in Catoa, New York, and you know, it is what it is. Oh, well, let's just wait for your dad to start printing something in the middle of the podcast because that's how you're closing here at home. We are located adjacent to the HP Office Jet Pro 8 7 1 0. And yeah, looking forward to seeing what gets printed out during the podcast. I'm great. Well, tonight is Krafi Hour Live. Why?

Because it's the third Monday of the month. What do you think of that? It's the first and third Monday of every month. Are you deleting something I hear your, I'm literally not touching a single thing. What are you hearing? What are you hearing? What are you deleting?

Sound like you were deleting a bunch of stuff. Like it sounded like a delete button or something. Jesus Christ. So you know what? Well, Ron is making announcements. Let me use this time to delete my secret documents. After this many years of doing it, this is still how we roll. You know?

Yeah. Last week we had radio audio on me. We didn't know. we had no idea. We just put out a whole week of episodes. So anybody who's wondering why that was, that's why. We didn't notice, cause this is watch what crap ends, okay? And shit gets taken care of a week later. So that stuff is fixed.

So if it was making you so crazy, you couldn't listen to those episodes, they should be fixed now. So you can go try again. And thank you for being back today and trying again today. We are trying to get it together. I promise. Yeah. And thanks for letting us know though, because sometimes we don't notice these things and people like, what's going on with your audio? So we appreciate that. Yes. And most men on Bravo.

We're just a work in progress. Guys. We're working progress guys. So yeah, tonight is 3.0. Crapie hour hour and that's our Instagram live show tonight We have a special guest. It's our first time. We've had a special guest on crappy hour Hopefully we'll be doing more of it. Let's see how it goes tonight But we will be doing that 5 30 p.m. Pacific time 8 30 p.m. Eastern standard time You can also watch that on our YouTube Which is youtube.com slash wash what crap ends. Okay. Um, that's that. Uh, when we're not doing that, we do dwell hello, which is our house hunter's international

podcast for one three plus. So that's one three plus thing. And then we do bonus episodes. We've done a real housewives of Beverly Hills and real housewives of Potomac trailer trash, which is where we, you guessed it, trash the trailer of those shows. Those are on our Patreon and available as crap is on demand videos. As is this episode, we are on a video. I'm seeing Ben's room, seeing Ben's beautiful face. Ben's my beautiful face.

Look, you know, you can see above me. This is exclusive to crap is on demands. People, you can see a little bonnet. I put on the air conditioner, so that way a cold draft is not coming the room. So isn't that a scenic background for everyone to look at? I was going to ask you if that was leaking or what's going on back there.

No, it's basically put a shower cap on the air conditions. For years I would come to my childhood bedroom and it would be so cold and drafty. And it turns out that the wall unit is just a sieve for cold air. And it turns out you can go on Amazon and you can buy these shower caps for your air conditioner. So I have a shower cap on the air conditioner back there. And you can also see the little edge of a SkyVodka bottle that when I was 21 I bought. And I thought it was the coolest thing ever. So I kept it as a keepsake. And now I should just really throw it out because when you're an adult, it turns out you can just buy the skyvodka bottle anytime you want.

It's not a keepsake. So you and now you just look creepy, you know, when you're an adult and you have empty skyvoddles all over your room, it's not a good look. There's all sorts of random stuff in here. It's like a, it's not great. It's not great. I'll say it that much. Home again, home again.

All right. Speaking of being home again, Real Housewives of New York, am I right? Oh my God. It's just like a warm cup of soup. At the end of a quiz. It feels so wonderful being in New York to recap the season finale of Real Housewives of New York. I just felt like I was just living inside the show. Yeah. So it's a season finale.

So congratulations to everybody involved. You did it. You did it. I have to say, by the way, general note, I think sick slash, yeah, I think like sick, jessil is the ideal jessil. Because I've really enjoyed jessil all season, but it turns out that when she's sick,

she becomes even more entertaining. I really enjoyed her- I'm so sick, Povit! My voice sounds like he's Povit, and all I can talk about is just- Oh shut the fuck up everyone! I really enjoyed that. I really enjoyed- I'm enjoying- I'm enjoying her journey into Brenda Vicaro as well. It's like a slow journey, but I feel like by the time she's an older lady,

she's gonna be like, she's going to be like, well, you know what I think about that. You know, just kind of like an old timey fisherman on a wharf, you know, who will take you across the sea to find your treasure for a couple of shillings. Yeah. But yeah, we've managed the end of the season. I'll be like, I'm gonna have a finale of us. I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll be like I didn't say that on camera. So the episode opens up gloriously with Si. They're like, let's wrap up the season with Si. So she's in a wig shop and she's trying to wig and she's like, that's a vibe. She's a vibe, right?

She's a vibe. Of course, no one answers because literally people who hadn't even seen this show yet already knew what a dud she was and were not going to participate in any dialogue with her. I know they do audience testing for these shows where they show like the episodes to people or casting tapes and then they get feedback. Usually you have like a little knob that you turn, like if it's good, you turn to the right. And if you start having bad feelings, you turn it to the left.

Have you ever done one of those focus groups? I've wanted to do one. I've done so badly. I feel like I did one. I've done focus groups before for like random consumer products, but never like the knobs while you're watching something thing. Yes, I have.

And I was completely wrong on mine. But, truth is I don't know public sentiment at all. So, but, sigh, they should have done that to sigh, but instead of just like pulling people off the street, they should have just gotten like,

people who work in the store, you know, just random everyday people, you know, just stop on a TJ max, see how random people react to a sigh. Just people, they're like, man, before you walk into this TJ Maxx, sigh to solvas inside. So we're gonna give you this meter and just, just tell us your experiences

as you walk around her. Yeah, there's like Nathan hot dogs. They're like, Uh-oh, size coming, whip out the knob. Whip out the knob. Because this wig lady, the knob would have been all the way left, so what I'm saying. She's like, get out of my store.

She's like, it's a vibe, right? Yeah, it's a vibe, right? Yeah, a vibe. It's a vibe. It's a vibe, right? It's a vibe. Okay, you can just keep saying it. And it does work,

because the lady does eventually answer. She has, uh-huh. She's like, man, this is a spirit Halloween store. We really don't care about your vibes. We're here for two months, then we're gone. So um, Bran is getting a reading from Dante, her sidekick. Do not confuse it with other scenes where Bran is pretending to read around his sidekick because she really loves to read guys. Only antique books. Okay, no confusing. So she is getting a reading, most likely from antique cards, from Dante.

Yeah, Dante is great. He's the tarot card reader and he's like, oh, girl, you might be caught in the middle of someone's issues. Like two friends were not getting along and your friends with both of them. It's like, wow, Dante, how'd you figure that out? She's on the real housewives.

Who would have thought she might be in the middle of Lady Drama? I know between takes, she's sitting in a director's chair that on the real housewives. Who would have thought she might be in the middle of Lady Drama? I know, between takes, she's sitting in a director's chair that says real housewives of New York City. There's like a little bottle of, you know, Pino and a feather boa. He's like, things might be dramatic for you.

I don't know. So I really like Dante because he wasn't really the stereotypical psychic. You see, he's just like, yeah, you know what, you might be caught in the middle of some issues I think with girls so you know people are getting a log with your friends with both and I was like wow Kathy's doing cards now it's like the male version of Kathy doing cards like chocolate chocolate chocolate that Kathy yeah yeah

That's a guy. That's a guy. That's a guy. That's a guy. That's a guy. That's a guy. That's a guy. That's a guy. That's a guy.

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people, jada, really, and they're in the regular life, but feel free to take. Wow. If only this show had a simmering feud big enough to actually call a truce on, that would be a dream. So then we have Jenna just doing a photo shoot for her eyelashes. And it's a lot of... Because what else? doing a photo shoot for her eyelashes. And it's a lot of, because what else? That's, yeah, because it's like a photo shoot. And then, I then, I still love taking pictures every week.

I don't think there's been an episode where people haven't been taking pictures. Weird. Everyone's, you know, just there are a lot of photo shoots in general on the real housewives, which is very funny because I feel like in my life, none of my friends take photo shoots.

It's just not something that happens often. Right, but specifically on this show, they're constantly taking photos of each other. It's even more here. Every week of something. So, which is fine, I'm not, you know, I don't care, but it's just something I've noticed. So Jenna is, yeah, she's doing her love scene,

eyelash kits. And then we see her like sitting with the models, you know, she's like, love your teeth, stunning, your teeth are, my God, hold on. You look just these lashes. I just, Jenna, do you need us to tell the model to do anything? I just, you know, I wanted to tell you that the way I'm time is money. So then we go to Uba and she meets up with Aaron at Bryant Park. We found out it was Brian Park for some sort of bumper, like it's like

bumper cars, but in tubes. And so Aaron, by the way, I have to say this about Aaron. I feel like we've spent the whole season fixating on her attitude without realizing how silly her voice sounds. Have you noticed her voice sounds silly at all times? Because we're always talking about like she talks like this, but if you listen to her, she really is like this.

She has such like, I'll see if I could do it. Last night I was like, you know what, her voice is so neat, she's like oh my god. I'm going I'm going I'm going bumper carding with Uma and I I love it. Never mind. It's too late too late in the season started new with voice for Aaron. I take it all back. I'm just sticking with the one I have. I was like now is the time for Uber and I to have fun together. Not with our hands, but with bumper cars like adults do. Okay.

No one came at you with their hands. She took your sunglasses off. Okay. Can we stop trying to sound like she, WF2S, Aaron, stop enough. Micro. Karen. So they are doing bumper cars in

Bryant Park. There's sort of Ubers spinning around a lot. And she's like, I love bumper cars so much. I normally I usually get kicked out. Which it's like, if you get kicked out of bumper cars, that's, you might have a problem. I'm sorry. Like if you're, if you're so aggro with your bumper car that you actually get banned from the bumper car, I mean, the bumper cars are designed for aggro people. So I'm excited to see that side of it more.

It's just, I would not be one of the people who's working there because it's fucking annoying. Like she's constantly bashing into the barriers on purpose and then going into the area where people are skating. And you know what, I mean, I don't even give a fuck about the safety of the kids who are skating. Run them over with your bumper cards. That would actually be fun for me. That would be a good scene. I don't care about that. But as the person who's probably had the job to move those bumpers around at some point in my life, please stop doing that. You're not a hilarious rich lady.

Stay within your bumper. Yeah, bumper cars are a funny phenomenon in general as a concept of an amusement. It's like, hey, let me simulate a car crash with you. This will be fun. I know. Why do we enjoy that? I love when people get mad about it.

Like when you're bumper-carrying people and then you slam into someone and they go, I know. I know. Really hurt. I know. Really hurt. I really hurt my neck. And then the rest of the day, they're complaining about their neck. Like you literally were in simulated car accident with me on purpose.

What are you complaining about? I know. It's like getting splashed when you're in a pool. So they were just like spinning in circles and stuff like that. And Uba's like, this is the errand that I love. Okay, now that, you know, we argue in Angola, but that is like what Aaron and I are meant, okay, like, we just like, this is what we like to do. We like to look pretty and we like to have fun

and eat at the same time. This is the errand that I love. Like, the errand that you love is driving terribly in traffic. That's what you're basically telling us. The Aaron that you love is driving terribly in traffic. That's what you're basically telling us. The Aaron that you love is sitting there waiting for you to crash into her. I mean, that's the Aaron I love too. You know what I mean?

I'd probably like Aaron a lot more if she just sat in a crosswalk, waiting for traffic. Just come. You know what I mean? I probably would like it too. She's like, you know, I really like the version of Aaron that sits on a shelf next to

those balloon squirt gun targets that you spray water at through their mouth until the balloon explodes on top of their hand like, oh, I love that Aaron too, you know, just put people you don't love in situations that you love. That's what I say. Can I take I have to say something, this has really bothered me and has nothing to do with this show. I'm sitting in a chair. I got a new, so I'm at my parents' house

and every time I record here, I always have to sit in this like hard wooden chair from like the 1800s it feels like. And it's so uncomfortable because we sit here for hours podcasting. And so this weekend, I was like, you know what I'm gonna do? I mean, you go to Staples and I'm gonna buy a new chair and I went to Staples and as luck would have it, it was the Staples Chair event. So I found this, I see.

Wow, that is, that is as luck would have it, Jesus. It was the Chair event. It was the Chair event. I knew it was the Chair event because when you walked in, there was a sign that just said, it was literally like the errand of Staples events, just said chair event. I knew it was a chair event because when you walked in, there was a sign that just said, it was literally like the errand of Staples events, just a chair event. And didn't even have a streamer or anything. It just said a sign that said chair events. And then a chair.

And then a chair saw say, chair event. It was like chair event. Chair event. Cackling chairs. So I sat in this one chair and it just felt so wonderful. And I was like, this is it. This is the chair. This is like, this is it. This is the chair.

This is like, the sorting hat has given me this chair. And so I bought it and I brought it home and I built it and it didn't feel as nice as the store. But I was like, it's okay. It needs to be broken in. Now that I'm sitting in it, it's pushing me forward and I'm so mad. And I'm like, I don't want to take this back. I don't want to undo this work and I'm just, I don this work. And I'm just, I don't know what to do.

I don't know what you need to do. What are you pushing you forward? You know, like when you get pushed forward in the chair and you don't want to be pushed forward, you just want to like be back. There's no, that's sliding forward. Just sliding forward. Just sliding big circular thing that you screw and unscrew

should under it. Wait, was it under it? I feel like I'm sliding forward in the chair. Yeah, you have to adjust it, babe. I'm trying. We're chair. Yeah, you have to adjust it, babe. I'm trying. We're both reaching around our chairs. I'm reaching around mine so I could tell them where the thing is.

I feel like I'm giving my chair a handy. Yeah, yeah, babe. Okay. I feel like I just needed to, if you see me squirming, I just felt like I had to explain why I was squirming so much. Sorry. I'm always squirming.

I have a thing that puts, that's supposed to help you with your posture, and so it curves out, you know, what do they call it? It curves out pretty dramatically. Like a lumbar. Yes, and so I have to like move my ass all the way back, and then it like does a little U on the back. It doesn't make me sit up straighter, okay?

It makes me complain more. That's what it does. So thanks for that. Another Aaron feature. We'll go back with your chair. Aaron Chair event. So Uber, chair event. Welcome to the stable's chair event.

When was the last time you fucked in a chair? We fucking a chair all the time. Abe can fuck other people in a chair, but only if they're dudes. We're swingers. Okay, so let's see. So, um, Uba, you know, they do like their wacky wild Uba. It's like, we're such fun, happy, lovely girls. Having a good time. like she has that home moment

And then they start talking about the other night at swingers and Aaron's like You know, I was like let's keep it going. Let's just keep it moving. I mean we were just so happy, you know I just felt a little bad about Pa that It's like you started about again Yeah, yeah, it was like well you went in on him a little little bad about PawVet. So you started to do it again. Yeah. And it was like, Well, you went in on him a little,

I mean, about just traveling in his points, like, who does that? And I think that you guys, because his answer was like, not what you wanted. And Aaron's like, yeah, but like, his answer was,

she lets me do what I want. Like, I don't get that. That's not a chair event. That's like a Dormat event. And so we see the clip of Povit being like, well, you know, I just want to travel, I want to eat, I want to have some fun, and you know, like being able to do stuff you love with someone else,

like she's perfect for that. Okay, not the most romantic outfit or answer, you know, it's not gonna like be an outlander moment. But neither was Abe's. Abe was the same thing. Abe was like, yeah, I like Eminem since she likes Eminem. So we just like had kids together. Yeah. It's after was literally, it was almost the same thing. So I don't know what high horse she's riding around on. Okay. But both of your husbands need to work on their answers

to things. Yeah, I agree. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crapence commercial. Watch what crapens and winter is crappening of a funniest recap broadcast. But if you want something more eerie, try the new podcast Go Story about my investigation into a murder suicide in my own family. Go SoundReal. At least that's what I've always believed. Sure, odd things happened in my childhood bedroom, but ultimately, I shrugged it all off. That is, until a couple of years ago, when I discovered that every subsequent occupant

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the same day. Seren's like, I mean, this is like your opportunity to say something nice about your wife in front of all these people, and like all these people, like she's amazing. She's a lovely mother. She really knows how to tell a trauma story, things like that, you know, and then you're not saying it.

She's got a repeat of phrase that she's heard over and over again, you know, something like that. Cher event, cackling house. Also just while I'm racking on Abe here, he also really didn't have anything romantic to say, even during your fake, Valorantal session that was not even close to the month that you actually got married, that was sponsored by like 10 different sponsors that you wrote your own vows for. I mean, he was like, yeah, I met Aaron through like a mutual I-Cal event. We didn't even know the other one was gonna be at.

So we like had babies together. Yeah, Abe is not someone that look at and think romance. Abe is someone I look at and think, when is he gonna get wind teeth? That's what I think of him. You look great on the back of a penny. That's what I think. Love your currency. Making copper fashionable again.

So, Uba said, I love, I love the answer, you know, and Aaron's like, but it's just a common answer. And she goes, no, because he's saying like, I love this person a common answer. And she goes, no, because he's saying like, I love this person because she's letting me be me, which also is not very romantic. Like it shouldn't be about you. The reason you love the person should not be about you, okay? She's about that person.

So she's like, yeah, I want someone who's gonna keep up with my shit. And anyone who takes my shit, I'm gonna love that person. You know, that's who I'm gonna love. Branch has had another thing you know I come into the event and then size has been he like pins me down and is like why are you not married like why are you not married and everyone's like he did oh I heard that I heard that at the chair event so then we see like the flashback of David being like,

what the woman like you doing without a man. So then it was like, I did not find my Abe, I did not find my Povit, I did not find my David. And once, you know, I didn't find any of the five men that Brinzo is talking about, I found no one. And once I do, like, maybe I might change my mind. People do ask single people that all the time. Like, what's wrong with you? It is so obnoxious. But I mean, I don't get offended. I've just found ways to deal with

it. Cause people say, Ronnie, I mean, you're like decent. And also, by the way, they don't overload me with a compliment, compliments either. I feel like at least with Uba, they're like, wow, Uba, you're a supermodel, you're stunningly gorgeous. Everywhere people go, they're like dropping everything to watch you walk through the door. You're a lovely person. With me, they're like, Ronnie, you're slightly hunchbacked, but you can speak well.

And it looks like you can still use your handwriting, which is always nice. You can say two words in Spanish. Why aren't you married, you know? But I just usually say, you know, I just don't feel the need to settle. And then I kind of look over at their partner and that usually stops it. Yeah. If anyone needs it, yes.

That's a good one. I once went to a wedding and it was in a church and the priest was making some sort of general prayers. He was like, let's have a blessing for those who are sick. Let's have a blessing for those who are no longer with us. Let's have a blessing for the people who are single. And I was like, whoa, I mean, at that point, I was single and I was like, excuse you.

Okay, don't put me down in like war-torn nations and like, like, ailing just because I'm single You're a priest Where's your lady? Yeah, no kidding Maybe he was talking about himself because in a lot of religions, the priests can't be married, right? Well So so I hear maybe it's like please please pray for those of us who aren't getting

many right now. Well, then he says, because we all know you're not complete until you've met another person in your life. He was saying, then he was saying this to the, to the, to the bride and groom. He's like, well, you know, you guys thought you like you, hey, you, you were, you were doing great and you had all these accomplishments and you, you were doing great, but you always thought you had it all, but you didn't have it all because you needed to find someone else in your life. And yeah, sir, I think it's what people do to tell themselves that they made the right choice,

because a lot of people do settle because they believe that they do have to settle. Like, you have to be with somebody, like, we've all made that every gay guy I think has that friend where you make that deal where it's like, oh my God, if we're both 40 and either one of us is married, we're gonna get married to each other. And when you're 20, that sounds so good. And then when I hit 40, I was like, fuck no. I'm not marrying your stupid ass.

I'm not taking care of your ass forever either. No, I don't wanna get out, you know? Yeah, So I was totally on the other side when she was like annoyed at it. And you know those things. The comments make me crazy. Like every pot has a lid. I fucking hate that saying, you know what? I don't usually not. And actually, I don't believe in lids on my pots. I like to boil open. Okay, I'm

a bear back fucking boiler. So take that. And you know what I realize, you don't need a whole, sometimes you do need to boil with the lid, you know what I realized? You don't need a hole. Sometimes you do need to boil with the lid, right? Occasionally, I don't like doing it off, but often occasionally you need it. And I had this whole drawer full of lids, which like guess we can relate to people that I've banged in the past. And I was like, I don't need all of these in my phone. So guess what I bought? I went on to Amazon. And I bought a one lid that fits all pots. It's huge. And it has rims all around it. A big slutty, big slutty lid. A one man. That's one man

you can call the fit your needs and then you can put them in a drawer and not think about them again until the next time you fucking need them. And that's called living your life to its fullest. Okay, now get the fuck out of here with your couples advice. The one man who services all the pots, I would call it, it's the jiggle-ed. I'm just a jiggle-ed, I love it where I go. Pots need my topping. Yeah, I mean, I'll see if- BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM B ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba Uba then says, Uba is saying that also saying how she has, she's actually seen this guy in Connecticut,

and the only person she has told has been Sy, and she goes, Eren is New York time. If I told Eren about this, everyone and their mother and their children will know. We're only if they subscribe. Only if they subscribe to the, your friends who will pack it.

The word of the news are not gonna know about, like I would never know a drink I am paying for that shit to be like guess what? Booba is dating a man from looks like you've reached your 10 article allowance. Please subscribe.

Please support journalism. Would you like to subscribe to the athletic? But also before this guy, this is going to go off to rails as we know, uh, throughout the episode. I just like to say starting off, she said it on camera. She showed cyan camera. Who cares? Like, who cares? And also you guys have been chasing Jessel all season, yelling open and honest to Jessel.

And you've been doing the same thing to jenna running around screaming open and honest jenna it's not a lot to hide who she who she's dating and then and now it's the biggest offense that size ever seen even though that's been her argument against everyone else the entire season. Yeah I don't think anyone really cares about uba dating Paul Blumann from New Canaan, Connecticut, like no one cares. No one cares. So, Aaron's like, yeah, well, I hope that Jussle and Sai can be like good again, which

is why I'm constantly getting around Sai and complaining about Jussle and how much Sai should date her. But can I be honest with you, Jussle, sometimes she just gets in the round about. Okay, she gets in the round about. And Ubis like, oh, in Africa, we call that around the bush. Aaron's like, well, she gets around the bush. And it was like, we're not going to have to, there's no bush here. What's your graphic location?

Would you like this metaphor to take place? And also, sitting in a park. So it doesn't really work. There's literally bushes everywhere. Speaking of parks, we now have Si walking into Central Park. Apparently she's happy to meet Brynn in Central Park, but she had a trouble meeting a jessil like down in Tribeca. So I'm like the language I so psi meets up with brin and brin's like hey did you walk into the

yore and say I don't take the mannequin because guess what I would fuck a mannequin if I could I wish I wish I could go into a store after hours just fuck all those guys. So they compliment each other's outfits. And it finds out we are here to meet the, I'm trying to look for the title of the guy, the tree, the arborist. The somal tree, somal yitri. The tree, tree mule.

Yeah. The concy, the tree, the seers. Yeah, the tree seers the tree, the Sears. Yeah, the tree Sears. Okay, this is such a bullshit business. You can buy a tree in a park. Give me a fucking break. Oh, you, hey, give me $50,000. You can have that star up there, huh?

Go on. I think it's one of those people, but without the business sense, it's a try and sell stars. Yeah, and, um, Brynn is like, every time I mean, like Central Park, I can help thinking, is this where Uba had sex? Is that where Uba had sex? I'm like, um, you should meet more gay men. Okay. That is what I think. But I, that's what I think too. I even think that when you guys

show clips of Central Park, I'm like, I fuck somebody there. Fuck somebody there. I fuck somebody there. It's like a yearbook of my 20s of fucking Central Park. I'm like, wow, we've really got away with a lot back then. I remember walking in Berlin at night by a park, and there were just cruisers in the park calling out to people. There were sort of making sounds to get people to come in the park to have sex. They were going like this.

There was like animals. I was like, the making's weird noise. Like, it was so strange. And I totally loved it. I thought it was great. I was like good for them. Well, I was thinking while I was watching this, the last place I'd want to bury my meme is a tree

that I've probably fucked behind in Central Park, but then I thought she always did tell me I was going to help for that. So actually it might've worked perfectly, you know? Just for a little good old ribbon beyond the grave. We can give each other in my family. You know she could take it. Like, I'll give you Mima.

And now for eternity, I'll be fucking a mad behind this tree. Enjoy your tree, enjoy it. So then Saitel's a story about how her, sorry, by the way, please don't bring up her mom. She really does not like talking about her mom. So anyway, my mom, she used to make incense and we have to sell it in Central Park. So like, we just have to do that.

We have to like go around, it's like so embarrassed to do that. Central Park. So like we just have to do that. We have to like go around. I was like so embarrassed to do that. Um, and Uba's, I mean, I feel like I've bought incense from her. So weird. I mean, I have bought incense probably from an urchin in a, uh, in Central Park. Wouldn't that be crazy? I feel like, you know, like a kid in the park, like, hey, missing, you want to buy some incense? I've probably been like, sure, kid. And taking home the incense, I mean,

what if our, our paths crossed? Abe goes by and like a carriage with a top hat. Like, hold on, let me zip up my pants. I'm just leaving the mimo tree. All right, sure, yeah. I'm just leaving the MeeMod tree. All right, sure, yeah. Did they have bumper carts in the 1800s? Or that was just, that was just carts.

That was just people running into each other by accident. Derby Sorry, sir. Oh, pay for that. You bumped into Abe. We just see Uba with a broom hitting a bush. Jatso, tell me. Tell me more. Okay. We just see Uba with the broom hitting a bush Okay, so Sign brim keep walking through the park talking and talking about moms and brim tells her that she's going to get a tree for her grandma And they're talking to the central park conservancy and

You know you can endow a tree. And I'm just surprised that she didn't say to the endowment guy like, Oh my God, you're lying so well endowed. I love some wood that's well endowed. That's exactly what I was going to say. I'm surprised she said the word endow without losing her mind. So I'm serious. You wouldn't know the way we're talking about it. But it's all about dead people that we,'t know it the way we're talking about it.

But it's all about dead people that we, you know, people that we lived in lost. But it was also a 15 minute long scene of them walking to a tree. So yeah, so Brynn is saying that she wants to do something special for her grandma, her memory, and she wants to do something in Central Park because growing up, her grandma would talk at nausea, which is what she says like five times this episode about, so she, her grandma loves big book. My grandma talks about at nausea,

I'm about going to Central Park. So then she says that her grandma loved ducks because she would always be feeding ducks. Adnazia! She felt those ducks adnazia. I used to have an aunt, my favorite aunt, who passed away. The traumatized me as I was saying last week was named Adele and we called her Aduk because her kids would always make fun of her because she had like a little waddle. And that was like her nickname for us and I have ducks everywhere. So I'm related to this.

I was like, this is really sweet. I love you Adak. I think ducks are wonderful. They're so funny to me. So don't fuck with that. Don't fuck Adak. So don't mess with that. So fuck you up. Fuck a duck. Don't mess with duck, so fuck you up. But yeah, she ends up picking this willow tree. First of all, I didn't believe this tree was available. I just don't believe this person.

I feel like this person is someone off the street holding up a sign saying like, I can sell you a tree. And she's like, oh my God, are you from the conservancy? And she's like, sure. And it's now she's paying him $1,000 or something. I just don't believe it because this is a weeping willow tree right by the water. How is that tree available? If you're something, it's a pretty good spot with a bench.

And oddly enough, Bryns like, yes, and now there's going to be like a permanent living thing in her honor. I'm like, I hate to tell you about trees, but the fact that there's an expression about them falling in the forest. Yeah, she's like, let's sit on this bench, made out of dead trees. Well, we talk about how trees live forever. Also, if I die and you decide to get me a tree, could you get me a tree like this? This is my kind of tree. First of all, I love weeping. Because you know, when I start crying, I'm a weeper. I'm not just like a light cry. I'm like, oh, I'm a weeper. Also, this tree is literally the best. It just

leans over and kind of drinks. Like it puts a little bit into the water and then it's just kind of laying there. Like it's always in a nap and that's my kind of tree. Yeah, it's like, I'm fine. I'm fine, don't worry about me. Yeah, we will dedicate a weeping willow in your honor, Ronnie. I kind of feel like a weeping willow is my vibe too, so I don't know what kind of tree I have. I feel like you're a straight stamping tree.

I feel like I'm a... You're not a leaning tree. I don't know, I'm trying to think of the trees, I'm not like an oak, I'm not a maple, I'm not a love maple syrup, but I'm not a maple, I know I'm not a leaning tree. I don't know, I'm trying to think of the trees. I'm not like an oak, I'm not a maple, I love maple syrup, but I'm not a maple, I know I'm not a maple, I'm not an olive, not a fig. I'm not a point sienna, not a, I'm not a beobob. What are those thin trees that like stamps straight up?

And they're like a Christmas tree kind of, but not like they don't go behind. Like a conifer, like a, cause they're thin. I could see myself being a birch tree cause I often feel like I'm just a super, super white. People saw me dancing like birch tree. The most white bread tree.

The fall of the trees. I listen to Carlyley-Ree-Jepsen and I dance the way I dance. Which tree it is. That's what I mean. So they could talk about the endowing and all that stuff and they get the, they woo and say on hug each other and stuff like that. And there's ducks in front of the tree,

so that makes it all more special. And I'm like, you know, I understand what Brin is going through a lot because I've been through a lot of the things That she went through and obviously like they're two different situations, but like she's a little sister to me And you know, we've got this real close relationship and nothing could be explained to other people who have got You know lost people as important as the people that we've like it just can't be explained to the board. She is my sister. I would like everybody to remember me saying this because of how the episode ends. Favorite person in the world, only person I truly love. Bread, nothing's gonna ever come between us. And we have a very close

relationship even though the tree that she dedicated had more money than me than I did when I was 16. So now, Brent, but this scene literally goes on for a show. My willow can even cry as a kid. Like if I got that from my mother, we'd never cry. We would never be able to cry. It was too strong to cry. It's just a regular willow tree.

That's what I had. We never had the opportunity to cry. So now, Brynn is hugging the tree. She's like, have you ever hugged a tree? It's actually the most wonderful thing. And the arborist is like, finally, I feel seen. And Brynn's like, it's so good. It's so good. And they're like, look, pick your arms out.

Oh, I love the girth of this trunk. Yes. Oh my God, where am I hands to key? It's Central Park, girl. You weren't the first one on this tree. You're the first one to actually pay for endowing this motherfucker thing. I'll take you back.

So, but it's actually a very nice scene. It's very nice. You never know it from this show. Okay, so let's go over to Jessel. Jessel is doing a photo shoot because that's how it rolls. So it's a show about photo shoots. So she's doing a photo shoot over at Jenna's apartment. Right.

And she's like, how is this real? How sure? I'm trying to do Jessel voice, but horse and it's a little tricky. It's just like, how is this real? How is it? I'm trying to do just a voice but horse and it's a little tricky. It's just like how is this real? I mean, of course the model is drinking just near the least of the other form. Darling! But how is this real? Of course the model is drinking green juice. You're so cliche. Oh Sister model friend join me in my good sister friend, Jenna,

and the other room. You know, I know it may look like it's been a long time coming, but I'm always in my sister jessles apart, and my sister Jenna's apartment taking pictures of random things. I'm so glad a model could show up to do it with me this time. I'm shooting the first campaign for my newest feature, an e-commerce platform bringing ready-to-wear accessories coming out of India in the Middle East. And then she goes into a room and Jenna, because I didn't realize the transaction in Jenna's apartment at first, I just thought I wasn't paying attention.

And then Jenna's like sitting on the floor, assembling all her love scene things like for something and jessels like, jena sister doll exists the best friend, what are you doing down there in the floor? and jena's like, oh um my friend is doing a photo shoot Naomi Campbell and I said I give them lashes so I'm just making the boxes and I just love the way Jenna just is on the floor, quietly flexing a much bigger photo shoot over whatever Jessel's doing in her living room. Well, she's also just getting those things on camera again. I mean, girl, all right, she does not do a scene that is not about something that she's selling.

And I love it. The episode opened with her selling the fucking eyelashes. And then she's like, okay, you're gonna sell your product in my apartment. Okay, well, I'll just be in here with all my products spread out. I'll have the floor in a room with cameras. Okay, and ready to go to Naomi Campbell,

not a random girl drinking green juice in my living room. Okay, so let's see, I don't know. This is a lot of lines. So then Jen is like, yeah, you know, I have so many photo shoots in my apartment. It's like crazy. Over the past few years, like maybe, like, gosh, I don't know.

50? Is that a lot? 60? Is that too much? My god, my brain's in myself. 70? No, 13. Is that a better answer?

God, I'm so insecure about it. Quit drawing off the cameras a minute. I'm just so nervous talking in front of the camera. It's hard. It's really hard. So she's like, just last if I could help her. More anyone else had. And, you know, I'm game.

I've been supported. I've been supported and helped by other women. And I think that's important to give back to other women, while I'll also reminding them that I'm simultaneously doing the same thing, but on a much more high profile scale, wouldn't they, or me Campbell? So they're taking photos and everything, and Jenna comes in to see how the photo shoot's going.

Of course she jumps in, which I think is great. I love watching Jenna work, and I just love how she's like, oh, hi, people from Craigslist, so fun that you're doing a photo shoot. Let me actually just do it properly for you since I actually know what I'm doing here. Okay, let's just like move this vase out of the way

and yeah, now that looks cute. Okay, going back to my name, you know what I just don't work. You look great, you look great, your beautiful model. First of all, just put these eyelashes on you. Great, does look really good. Okay, now can you make a J with your finger? Okay, because those are the lashes, love Jenna. Okay, one thing you might want to not be standing right

in front of the cardboard cut out of Michelle Obama. I just, it's weird. I don't know, she hasn't signed a waiver for this and I just, I pose with that sometimes. You know, just to see how I look in different outfits. Whatever. Just like, you know, I just, you know, Jenner's a perfectionist. And if I had enough money, I would hire her to creatively direct this sheet.

But I don't have enough money, so what I did was have a photo shoot next to her, and then kept on saying, Jenner has someone from Shits Creek is here, and she comes running out, and then she gets distracted by the camera, and then she goes back into her harbour, and I say, The Shits Creek woman wants to talk to you again, and she comes running out and then she gets distracted by the camera and then she goes back into her hovel And I say this shit's creak woman wants to talk to you again And she comes running right back out again. It works every single time You just might want to move this This poster-sized Prince Harry. I just sometimes like the stare at it and say got your brave, you know

I'll just get that out of the way. You know, you should continue this photo shoot in front of this giant book of Joan Didian I did notice that. Hey, um, can we move the Joan Didian book out of the way? And can we also move away the blueprints for a rock and fall or a plaza, which I now control? Okay, great. Okay, you know what, I'm just gonna, um, well, let me just fix this dress. Wait, you, you putting khaki pants on her. I'm just trying to help. Ah, jussles, then jussles. Oh, this is so good sister Jenna. You've done such a good job. I mean, that's good. It's like, it's giving, like, so-and-guilty, but like, tribal, but like, Amazon, but like, Iceland, but like, Brazil, but like, Iowa. I don don't know I'm running out of geographic places Can she out of the room yet? Oh thank God So she goes to get glue because she's out of glue and uber come uber calls first and

Dressels like I'm where are you and she's like I'm downstairs the elevator's not working. Oh, yeah, so Sister Jenna's elevators being worked on oh hell no, and you didn't tell me bye Bye Unfortunately, the elevator has a case of the pavits not very functional useful Thanks for listening to watch what crap in says is the end of part one you can catch part two later on Watch what crap in's would like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney.

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