Watch What Crappens - #220: Because Knowledge

Episode Date: September 16, 2015

The quest for knowledge is never complete, and no one knows that more that Meghan King Edmonds, resident gumshoe of "Real Housewives of Orange County." This week Ronnie Karam (trashtalktv.com) and Ben Mandelker (bsideblog.com) discuss Meghan's latest investigative updates, among other ludicrous things. There's also chatter about the silliness on "Married To Medicine," including news that water is in fact a very tranquil place to be. You can donate to us at http://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens And remember to like us on Facebook: http://facebook.com/watchwhatcrappens And here's some other stuff: Our Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/watch-what-crappens On iTunes: https://bit.ly/crappens Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/watchwhatcrappens Ronnie on the Web: http://www.trashtalktv.com Ronnie on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/trashtalkteevee Ronnie on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/trashtalktv Ben on the Web: http://www.bsideblog.com Ben on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/bsideblog Ben on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/bsideblog See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously. But hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Next Issue is the mobile app that lets you tap directly into the world's most popular magazines anytime, anywhere, using your phone or tablet. The best part? Next Issue is offering a free trial right now when you go to nextissue.com forward slash crappins. Again, you can try Next Issue for free right now when you go to nextissue. so much that crappens? What happens? What happens?

Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap This episode of Watch What Crappens is brought to you by our premium Patreon subscribers, Claudia Catalina and Christy Daugherty. Yay! Hey everyone, welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all crap on bravo that we just love to watch and talk about and laugh about and make fun about and not really cry about but make fun about how to marry to medicine yeah so uh i'm ben mandelker from b-side blog.com and the banter blender i actually recorded a new episode just this morning uh yeah i know what a, I know. What a shocker. What's it about? It's about bagels and Rosh Hashanah and gender inequality in Hollywood. Naturally.

Wow. Okay, right on. That sounds good. That other ghostly voice you hear, that's Ronnie Karam from TrashTalkTV.com. Hi, Ronnie. Well, hello, Ben. I didn't get to introduce you with my

normal platitudes. The wonderful, the hilarious, the always funny, super and lovely and kind Ronnie Karam. When it doesn't really come from a feeling place, it hurts, Ben. It's actually stabbing me. Well, I guess it didn't come from a feeling place because I'm filled

with so much sorrow and empathy because i keep on thinking about how high will a sycamore grow oh my god the colors of the wind i'll kill you'll never know oh disney disney died okay the last podcast we just recorded our bonus episode we talked about colors of the wind too much and that that was the 90s. That was the end of the golden era, Ben. Let's let it die there. Well, I mean, Vanessa Williams raises a very important question. Have you ever painted with the colors of the wind?

Have you? David? And with who? Where? Where were you painting? Where were you painting these colors, David? David, did you? How many Color Me Minds have you taken your mistress to, David?

Did you bring home the poster board that you colored on with the wind, David. David, did you... How many color me minds have you taken your mistress to, David? Did you bring home the poster board that you colored on with the wind, David? I want to show the kids. Kids, we're gonna have a meeting. David, why did you cut down our sycamore tree? Now we'll never know how tall it'll grow. David? Alright, if you're still listening... I want you to tell us... David, I want you

to tell me about all the things I never knew I never knew. Specifically about your mistress. Oh, my God. Anyway. I've been forewarned. If you're still listening to this podcast, that's pretty much how it's going to go. Yeah. If you're a new listener and you're already wondering what Pocahontas has to do with Bravo,

the answer is nothing. Absolutely nothing. With Bravo, the answer is nothing. Absolutely nothing. This all goes to say that if you want to hear more lunacy like this, you can come to our Facebook page, facebook.com forward slash watch what crap happens. You can see all sorts of fun stuff. There's all sorts of gossip and shady, shady comments from all our hilarious listeners.

Yes, there is extra shade this week, and it's been very hot. Yeah, it has been hot. And it was raining, and I turned around, and it's sunny here in LA. Happy Rosh Hashanah to all our Jewish listeners, by the way. Also, you can support us on Patreon.com forward slash Watch for Crappins, and if you support

us there, you would gain access to our bonus episode which we do once a week we just recorded the previous one as ronnie alluded to where we not only talk about pocahontas and the colors of the wind but we also talk about um thomas ravenel and theresa judice and uh something else with bra. I don't remember. Yeah. Jill Zarin. Jill Zarin. Naturally.

We did miss Kim Richards trying to get Xanax in smoke shops. Yes. And also Yolanda Foster coming back to tell off the Taylor drug women about her Lyme's disease. Yolanda returns to confront Taylor about her Lyme's disease. Yolanda returns to confront Taylor about her Lyme's disease.

What is that? What are you saying? I don't have it? I don't know. Your husband shushed me. That's what I'm saying. Oh, really? So I don't have Lyme's disease?

You sound like David's family. Oh, well. I just don't like to be shush like me, shush. You know what? Enough! Enough! You know what? These things that you are saying are very ugly, okay? You are being very Bella right now. Be more like Gigi.

Please. You know what I always say? Why wake up and be the other one if you don't have to? You know? You know what you should do? You should be like the other one and get to work you know go down to the corner and sell pocahontas towels okay do what the other boy one does you know he plays a soccer and then he got a blow dryer now he's famous like to do something i don't know

get shot you know do it on my property well don't you have something better to do than talk about my lyme disease don't you have don't you have little mermaid to do than talk about my Lyme disease? Don't you have little mermaid towels to settle down with Anwar? Oh, little mermaid towels. I will never forget that. So even though Beverly Hills hasn't been on for a while and probably won't be on for a month or two,

they are still just churning out the craze. Churning, churning, churning. I'm excited. I'm excited. So also on our Patreon bonus episode, we also talked about nini leaks throwing a tantrum at fashion week so um go there and support us it's really cool and of course by the way you know you can subscribe to our podcast on itunes right you know do it and thank

you to everybody who leaves uh itunes reviews yeah and supports in every way. Yeah, someone told us that we should go a little deeper, which is hilarious. I think maybe we should. We should, but I don't know if we can. Is there any more depth to these shows? Or in us? We'll try. We'll try.

We'll try. We'll try. We'll try to paint with the colors of the wind as best we can. But you can't choose your depth level, unfortunately, in life. But we will try to be deeper. Like a Big Brother contestant, we will try to sound smarter than we actually are. Exactly. We'll be like Quad. We'll be like, well, we are having many very thoughtful moments at this present time.

I'm a corrig multi-pack of thinking thoughts, honey. Put me in a thing, pop me down, make some hot water, blow through me fast, and boom, I'm a tasty cup of hotness, honey. A lot of intellectual moments

have very much transpired. So we will get to that. We will try to very much transpire our intellectual moments. So one thing. By the way, I believe this podcast opened with questions about painting with the colors of the wind, and if that's not deep,

I don't know what is, okay? And it can only go up from there. Or down. So I was looking for something in that episode, and it was this story that jutz posted so thank you jutz jutz happy russia shana jutz uh my friend on facebook is like i'd like to say thank you to shoshana happy russia shana shoshana thank you for having me as part i thought it was cute okay vicky gumvelson admits to mix up with Brooks' cancer story.

This is on Star Pulse. Oh, it's a mix up. It was just a mix up. Okay. Okay. We thought it was cancer. Turns out it was just a common cold. Shut up.

Shut up. Shut up. I'm getting it queued up. I'm sorry. It's not ready. Oh, here we go. Vicky Gunvalson. Shut up.

There. Sorry. I was late. It's okay. It's a warm-up story. It's a V. Oh, here we go. No? Shut up! There. Sorry. I was late. It's okay. It's a warm-up story. It's a Vicky warm-up. Vicky Gumbelson has been standing by Brooks' ears through this entire season as he has been trying various treatments, staying away from white bread, shady, and fighting accusations

that he doesn't have cancer. Ever since the psychic claimed that Brooks' cancer diagnosis was wishy-washy there have been rumors that he doesn't have cancer blah blah blah okay i love the internet and i love being a part of it because listen to this next part according to a new tweet i love that that's your story i read i read a tweet that vicky wrote and what's even worse that our story is this story about the tweet. Yeah, I know. Okay, anyway. Vicky is now revealing the story behind Brooks' missed cancer appointments. Aris had missed some appointments, but it isn't because he doesn't have cancer.

Vicky says that Bravo had something to do with it. Bravo gave Brooks cancer. You heard it here first. So you have cancer. You have an appointment with a top oncologist bravo gets in the way you missed your appointment and you're like oh well well i guess i'll just have to stick with my cancer then yeah okay i get that i get that and vicky obviously knows that she's kind of in a caught place which we'll talk about later but her was, I don't think you attack or judge someone's

healthcare choices. It's their decision. Yeah, it's not about the freedom of medical... It's not like HIPAA. It's not like the Freedom of Medical Information Act, Vicky. It's their decision. No one's saying he shouldn't make the decision. It's like, why did he ignore

it? And then she tweeted, you get as much support and info as you can.oks never wanted info for shan or for shannon doctor very strange but that's what strange like why wouldn't he want the number of that doctor yeah nothing makes sense it's not even fishy it's like obvious that vicky kind of knows that she's with a shady dude and she chose to be with a shady dude because she doesn't want to be alone in the house fluffing a pillow you know what's the point of being able to buy all the pillows you want if you're just fluffing them and you're fluffing them by yourself at the end of the day you know yeah don't you know um you know uh maybe vicky and brooks should be reading some medical journals or

if they don't want to read some medical journals, you know what they could also read? Next issue. Oh my God, Bean. Yes, it's time for a next issue ad, everyone. Let's talk about it.

Yeah, so you guys as we all know, your time and Vicky's time because she works is precious. And you want to feed your mind with the best of what's out there. But who has the time to sift through all the nonsense on the internet, right? Oh, I'll tell you. Tell me more about it, Ben. Okay. Well, for those of us who want premium content like ma'am, oh, God, ma ma'am and don't have time to waste finding it

there's next issue next issue is the mobile app that lets you tap directly into the world's most popular magazines anytime anywhere using your phone or tablet next issue lets you dive deeper into the story with interactive content for a richer reading experience i mean things move on that page come on the magazines do No, unless you move them. And then they're moving. I'm not going to tell anybody they're moving. My magazine has the right to move! And by the way, there are iconic magazines like People,

Vogue, Esquire, TAM, and more. The cat one, the finance one, Fast Global, the one with the dollar sign on it. You know, you gotta read when you Global. You know, the one with the dollar sign on it. You know, you got to read when you work, you know. Some people read fitness magazines. I read, you know, economic things while I poop.

So sue me. I'm sorry. I pooped. Yeah. So sign up for Next Issue right now. You'll get immediate access to all the top magazines, including back issues and exclusive videos and photos. By the way, I actually went on to next issue This week

And I read an article An interview that Andy Cohen gave to Entertainment Weekly What did he say In said article It was the usual stuff Like Yeah I love having the housewives on I love making people talk

And oh my god it was fun And like we always have a shotski And oh my God, like it was fun. And like, we always have a shot ski, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,

but basically it was nothing. The best part. Next issue is offering a free trial right now. When you go to next issue.com slash crap. And that's next issue.com slash crap. And again, you can try next issue for free right now. When you go to nextissue.com

slash crappins. Ah, so good. So good. Next crappins, you in my wow? Wow. So, um, now that we have that out of the way, let's just get right into Real Housewives of Orange County.

That was the longest opening of all time, you know. It was like a 30-minute opening. We talked about some gossip. It's okay. We were actually post-opening. I'm not stressing. We judge everybody else. I should be able to judge us as well. How long does the opening

go? You cut it down, you'll never know. Real Housewives of Orange County shall we? let's do it so it opens up with Megan and Heather

arriving at a restaurant and I love this I know you love when the waiters come by but I love that oh yes you know I was cheering this time

the waiter comes by and Heather's like oh hi how are you? and he's like oh good miss very nice very nice

and he walks away and Heather turns to Megan and's like oh good miss very nice very nice then he walks away and heather heather turns to megan's like oh i've known alfredo for years meanwhile cut alfredo being like my name is ernest he's like my name is ernest i tell you every time oh alfredo it's so funny i know alfredo he's worked at so many restaurants. Every restaurant she goes to, she's like, oh, hi, Alfredo. It's like Lucille Bluth going to the Latinos in film awards and going, a sea of restaurants and no one wants to take my order. That's what she's like. Oh, there's Alfredo. It's amazing how many restaurants Alfredo works at.

And the car wash, too. Gosh, he really gets around. And the car wash, too. Gosh, he really gets around. Alfredo must drive a really nice car because he was gardening outside of our rental the other day. He was gardening. I saw him out there. Crazy.

You know, Alfredo, I mean, he really just gets around. I went to Home Depot and he was standing out there with all of his brothers. I was like, sure. Okay, pick a few and get in the car that guy's crazy but this lunch was funny and obviously obviously they've uh shot this a couple weeks later uh some time has passed because everyone has new hair and megan has kind of a new face yeah and everyone's like getting along too um, Megan's face is different. Her forehead's higher and her eyebrows aren't moving. She's looking more and more like a very lovely trans boy, right? Kind of, yeah.

She's starting to look like a handsome gay male in his 21 has decided to become a lady. Oh my god, I would be so for that twist it would be it would make sense it would so um so megan has some news which is that like hi guys i haven't seen you for two weeks but um yeah so like i was um i was thinking like what are my hobbies and then i was like truth knowledge she's well actually first she says that she and jimmy went away for the weekend and she's like it was really great you know we were away we had no kids and you know and i'm sure vicky was like well you don't have any kids anyway but anyway i'm just watching but anyway so apparently the news is that Hayley had a 200-person party and trashed the house.

Like, who does that? I punished her by making her call the maid. Like, why should I have to call the maid? Because, like, that's not what a house is for. Like, I mean, one time I told Hayley, and then it cuts back. It's like, do-do-do-do, do-do-do-do. She's like, Hayley, what are houses for? And then Hayley's like, to live in. She's like, yeah.do-do-do, do-do-do-do. She's like, Hayley, what are houses for? And then Hayley's like,

to live in. She's like, yeah. Houses are for parties, right? Am I right? Remember when I told her that? She's like, listen, Hayley, if you want to trash someone's house, everyone knows you're not supposed to throw a party. What you're supposed to do is go through the entire house and throw out everything and replace it with Tuscan furniture.

God, Hayley. God, if you really wanted to rebel, you would have a storage unit with all of your mother's shipment. And you would be putting your name tag on the back of dressers that you wanted to keep, okay? Well, it's a good thing that this did not happen

in the Bador household because Haley would be writing a lot of letters. David? Yes, dear. I remember when I threw a party when I was young. That was the greatest time in my life. And then I met you. Dear? Dear. I used to love

to party and have fun and live, dear. Dear? I'm sorry, dear. I've ruined everything, dear. David? David, I used to be a rockin' partier back in the day, David. David? David. So Shannon to be a rocking partier back in the day, David. David, David. So Shannon has new hair as well. She looks all shiny and glowy when she comes and she's late.

She's like, sorry, I was late. I was in the car with the kids. Yeah, and by the way, I forgot to mention Heather's response to this party situation. She's like, well, if my kids do a party without my permission, they'd better be prepared to lose their car, their phone, their clothes, car number two, second wing of the house, their airplane, the helicopter, private beach. Colette will only have use of half of the million dollar cabinets. We are going to rename Colette's method champagne was from Colette to Nicola. She's like, well, my kids must behave. We name an alcohol after them.

That'll teach them. They're only going to get two islands in the archipelago instead of three. Why have a brat when you can have a brand? Am I right, Alfredo? I'd love some water, please.

He's like, actually, I'm just here to drop off this FedEx. Alfredo knows how to party. Am I right? You're always shooting those guns in the air. Right, Alfredo? He's like, that is so offensive. We all do it, Alfredo. We all shoot guns in the air.

Whenever me and Terry have a fight, we have an Alfredo standoff. We both walk away from each other, turn around at one time, and whoever's the most scared first wins. Alfredo's always going on spring break. Am I right, Alfredo? Acapulco, right? That's where your family's from, right? Don't make Alfredo mad. He'll decapitate you in the street and then try and sell drugs to your children.

Am I right, Alfredo? I saw it on the news. They had this whole new TV show on Netflix about Alfredo. It's called Narcos. It's great. I hate admitting this, but I wish that I was on TV as much as Alfredo. I know it's for the wrong reasons. Now, Alfredo, sing us one of those songs

with the guitar and the hats, okay? So what is happening at this point? Where are we? So Shannon comes in. Well, I guess something else happens in between that. It's weird. It cuts to Tamara. Tamara sending her mom out on a date.

Tamara's like, oh my god, batch. It's crazy, batch. My batch mom is like, in my house, batch. I'm here on Tinder, batch. She's like, my mom is such a hitch. Like, yeah, well, no wonder.

Apples don't fall far from the tree, and that's a tree you don't want to touch. They splatter very nearby and then go brown and get all like light. Yeah. And Tamara's like, isn't it crazy watching a senior date? I'm like, yeah, Tamara. Really crazy. Cut to Tamara like floating in a hot tub with Vaseline on the lens.

Like we know. We've been there before. So much white trash going on. You're a frontier woman. You're a pioneer woman. And then they cut away to one of Ryan's stepdaughters. And I'm not making fun of the stepdaughter, because she's, like, nine, and she just was sucked into this situation. But I'm going to make fun of her mom for naming her Brooklyn spelled B-R-O-O-K-E-L-Y-N-N one word. I mean,

I can't. I can't. I'm sorry. I can't. You know who's really upset with all of this baby trend names and terrible names for your children? Those people who make those keychains with names on them. Oh, yeah. They're like, no one's buying a David

anymore. David? David. David. David. David. David. David. Who have you been buying novelty name chains for? David. I've got a keychain with your name on it, David. I look at it, David.

I stare at it after I stare at the clouds after I'm having an emotionally unstable day, David. I'm taking my rage out of the clouds and then I stare at your keychain. David. David. It's spelled D-A-V-E-E-D-I-H. David. David. It's spelled D-A-V-E-E-D-I-H. David, David. I attached your David keychain to my car key. And then when I turn on the car, I can't help but wonder, do you turn on your mistress the same way I turn on the car with your name on it? David, David.

I wonder if David's turning something on right now. David. David, I would like you to list off all the cars you have turned on with your Shannon keychain. And if it's zero, then I know where we stand. Lowering the chandelier. Damn it.

So before Shannon even gets to crazy as David, she shows up and I don't know what happened, but I guess time heals everything. Yeah. Oh, we could sing another musical, but I won't. And she's really happy. She's like, oh, hi, Megan.

Hi, Heather. These are like her two arch rivals from the past two years, and she's having a lovely little dinner with them. Heather's like, I want you to know, I was sitting in that chair and then I got up and moved so you could sit in it. Hey, hi. You look great. Love your Jennifer Aniston hair. I love Shannon. I love how to read the menu.

She gets out her librarian glasses. She's like, hmm, does this have sugar in it? Is this fatty? And Alfredo comes over and she's like, oh, hello, Louise. Oh, I've known Louise. I've known Louise for years and years. I'm sorry, that's Alfredo. No, that's Luis. He works at the car wash.

I just saw him on the news decapitating someone. I think we may have a... I don't know. I think this may have an experience of mistaken identity because it's clearly Alfredo. I love how Shannon orders her drink, too. She's like, I would like a Grey Goose. I would like a Grey Goose on the rocks with just a plate of lime.

I don't even care. Just give me an entire plate of limes and just squeeze an entire lime in there. I don't even care. And I thought, you know, you just ordered. You literally just ordered a plate of limes. And he's going to bring you a plate of limes, and you're going to go, oh, a plate. I guess I'll have to squeeze it in myself. She's like, I know you know how to squeeze limes,

because I see you every time I go to Rosa Mexicana making that wonderful guacamole, Luis. I can do without salt on the table, but I must have some pain and misery, or I just can't eat. It's my favorite condiment. salt on the table, but I must have some pain and misery, or I just can't eat. My favorite condiment. By the way, Luis, the oranges I bought from you on the side of the road were just wonderful. Do you add sugar

to those juices? Tell me the truth! Luis, don't lie to me, Luis. Luis, the oranges tasted a little fatty. Luis? Luis? Luis? Meanwhile, Megan's like, is his name Luis or Alfredo? I'm going to get to the bottom of it because I love

justice and knowledge. I'm going to Google Translate that and then I'm going to do a Craigslist search. BRB. Shannon's like, oh yeah, I've been on vacation, loving life, loving everything, loving you, loving you guys. Megan's like oh yeah I've been on vacation loving life loving everything loving you loving you guys

it's like yeah me and Shannon are friends now guys this just in I just turned on the TV and Luis actually hosts an entire news program on Univision

you guys next time Luis comes to the table I'm gonna buy flowers Hosts an entire news program on Univision. You guys, next time Luis comes to the table, I'm going to buy flowers for Shannon. Because we're friends. Because we're friends now. Turns out I like her. She lets me talk about cancer all I want. And then it cuts to them. She's like, I don't believe Brooks has cancer. And Shannon's like, ah.

Who's this? Who's this? Looking all afraid like someone can hear her. which, of course, we all can. But she's looking terrified like she's going to get beat up. And Megan's like, what do you think about cancer? What do you think about Brooks and cancer? What do you think? Make it your opinion.

She's like, I'm not saying a thing. We're friends now. We found a common hobby. Knowledge. Oh, I love justice. I love justice and knowledge, too. For instance, I loved finding out that David had a mistress. David?

David. Now, which of these is more fatty, the steak or the halibut? I was like, please tell me that you did not just ask that. And then cut to Megan going, I'll just have the set of Brussels sprouts. Megan going, uh, I'll just have this set of Brussels sprouts. So the first piece of news we had was that Shannon is going to have a Year of the Ram slash Aries party.

Aries party. Because why not? Why not have a party? Well, I'm an Aries because of when I was born. And I know a lot of people. And we're Aries. And Aries like air and open spaces. So here we are. I'm gonna do it. And Aries like air and open spaces. So here we are.

I'm going to do it. And I wanted to remind David about all the times that he rammed his mistress are times he could have been celebrating the year of the ram with me. But then Megan says, she's like, well, I've been investigating Brooks, and I decided to call up his doctor, and turns out, the doctor doesn't even treat cancer patients. Because she called up, she pretended

that she had cancer. Oh my god, she's like, I'm happy, how are you? Well, I've been having fun, and I'm like, okay, well, I called the doctor, well, I found out the doctor, and i found out the doctor and then i called him and then like i was like hi um like i uh like i have a friend like who has cancer i have hair cancer they they recommended me to you because like you guys have can't like you guys are cancer

people right and then they were like what and then i then I was all like, lymphoma, you know? Like, I heard my friend was like, and then they were like, you need an oncologist, you guys. She's like, that's so cancer. She basically, Megan is somewhere between Kristen and Reza at this point. She lives somewhere between those voices.

And personality-wise. Yeah. Like, between delusional and then stalkerish like kristen well she someone from instagram that i met on a blog commenter that had sex with tom yeah well because the thing is that kristen to clear her name went to the ends of the earth to dig up all this dirt and it just made her look worse and that's what megan is doing the difference though is that i actually am curious about what Megan finds in her awful way. Yeah.

And I like, you know, you have to give her credit, even though it's terrible. Like, I'm not going to say what she's doing is terrible. But you're kind of rooting for her because Brooks is such a slime bag. And I like when people are like, no, I'm not going to, you know, just roll over because you tell me I'm insensitive. Fuck that. Your boyfriend's lying about cancer, period. Yeah. But then again, Megan is so ridiculous the way she justifies everything.

She says, she's like, people that I love have cancer. And if you're going to fake it, I'm going to get to the bottom of it. I'm like, you're just going to get the bottom of it because you feel like he's lying. It has nothing to do with the fact that people that you know have cancer. Like, we all want to get to the bottom of this. Look, last week, I thought I might have cancer, okay? I had almost cancer last week. And I, you know what I did?

I went to the doctor, because that's what normal people do, okay? It's called justice. I went to Dr. Justice, okay? And the scales were, like, uneven, but that's what they do. They weigh you. What are you going to complain? It's justice, okay? I'm not even sure if justice is blind. Like, I want to go to a doctor and find out who told her she was

blind because i think she can see through the blindfold okay even blind people have to get on the scale okay it's justice yeah megan is going off now because she knows this is fishy and so she's done a google search and of of course, the Google search turned up what we've all read on the internet and talked about on this show for years, which is he's had other really shady relationships where he's claimed to have cancer and people have said on the internet that he hasn't.

But of course, none of it's proven. But then again, what are you going to do? Go to the guy's house with a P know p-test I mean do you even test you don't test cancer with a p-test I'm not that stupid but whatever test you know it is I mean it is all shady because as was brought up during this meal that

Brooks that Vicky asked Shannon according to Shannon to help her out and Shannon put Brooks in touch with this cancer doctor that we mentioned earlier this episode. She's on tour. She's on tour right now. She's on a college tour.

She's around the world. I'll call her right now. Oh, might be on a plane because she's always on tour. And you know what she talks about? Lymphoma. That's all I'm saying. I mean, I don't want to bring down a friend. But lymphoma. Lymphoma tour. Okay. Okay. So Brooks apparently got a flat tire, and that's why he couldn't see Shannon.

Two flat tires, which is why he couldn't see Shannon's arm. On his way to the doctor. Yeah. I have to say, that is shady as hell. Real shady. I don't care what Bravo had to do with it or whatever. If you have cancer and someone has set up a meeting with a top oncologist and you get a flat tire and you don't reschedule, that's weird. Well, you know, Vic, what I like to say is that sometimes you get cancer and you have an opportunity.

You have an opportunity to get that cancer fixed, take it to a shop and get it fixed. But then on your way to the shop, you get two flat tires. And what do you do? Do you write a customer service complaint to heaven? Nope. You accept it and you die of cancer. You accept it.

You go to a supermarket. You buy some Oreo thins and you go home and enjoy the rest of your afternoon. Oh, Brooks, cancer loves Oreos. What are you doing? But they're thin Oreos. There's less cancer. Stop feeding the cancer. Okay?

Take me to dinner. Why aren't you taking me to dinner? Anyway, so Brooks, yeah. Shade, shade, shade. But of course, we've got 10 more Brooks scenes to talk about today. I know, exactly. So then we go to Tamara and Ryan taking her mom out on a date. Why they needed to be with her is beyond me.

But basically, the skipper from Gilligan's Island comes around, gets Tamara's mom off. They go off to a... He doesn't get her off. He swoops, takes her away. And they have a perfectly lovely little date. And while they're on their date, Tamara and Ryan are talking about the finances and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Long, blah, blah. Long story short, Tamara thinks that Ryan should go to church now.

Oh, oh, that is a long story short. Okay. Here, Tamara, Tamara, Tamara,

Tamara, same season. She's talking about how Christian she is. She's throwing every family member, same episode where she later says, why don't you give a straight story for once in your fucking life? Yep. She just rips everybody in this episode. Okay.

In this one dinner, she's like, that guy's all disgusting, bitch. And she's like, Brian, so I've been talking about finances. And I'm like, we were talking about the money that I gave him. He's like, yeah, the money to help me start over. Yeah, the money that you wanted to spend so that I would relocate so I could be closer to you with the baby. Yeah, like the money that you borrowed. Like, he would like

it if it was a loan. He's like, so what? It's not my dad. Interesting point because he's like, I'm not borrowing money from Eddie. I'm borrowing money from you, bitch. And I didn't ask to borrow it. you kind of made me take it so i would move back to this expensive ass place that's not fair i agree i agree he moved under false pretenses uh i also think though that he should respect that the money i mean tamra's tamra handled this all wrong but he should respect right he should also respect

the fact that the loan is not coming just from tamra it's coming you're married from both of them and so when he says well he's not my dad well guess what if someone's loaning you money you you pay them back even if they're not your father because most people are not going to be your father who are loaning you money that being said what what Tamara should do is pay the money out of her own personal whatever, if she does even have her own personal whatever. And that's it. Well, I think that that's probably what his argument would be,

that she's the one who's made the money. She's the famous one. She brings in all the money. And he's on the show too, and he's been used in that way too. And if she wants to give him money and he takes it, he was like, why is it Eddie's business now?

Of course, because it's Eddie's money too. He's married. That's why. But yeah, like she's just confused the whole thing. And now she's turning it into, you borrowed money from us.

Where was it always that he borrowed money or did she give him money to relocate? Cause didn't she say she was going to give him money to relocate and then he was going to move into the house. No and then he was going to pay the rent? No, I think it was to get like a down payment on their house. Yeah. So and then basically it turns into, well, you should be going to church. Yeah.

It's like, don't you need therapy? He's like, mom, I'm really stressed living with all these women. Like, I'm going crazy. And first it was just this hot girl. And now it's a hot girl with three kids. And then it's a hot girl who's pregnant. And then it's a hot girl who's pregnant. And then it's a hot girl who's pregnant with kids. I'm not going to get that.

He's about to have a Vicky and his head's going to explode. Yeah. She's like, move into a $3,000 apartment batch. I want to see my grandkids. This is what's wrong with America. This is what's wrong. Living beyond your means. Although, not like I don't do that.

But, you know, meeting a girl on instagram getting all up and getting her knocked up with her three kids and then moving into a house you can't afford and all that yeah yeah all that good stuff and all that and all that and having a a bad, bad tattoo. Yeah, and just getting older in every scene. I know. I measured a flashback of him from 10 years ago. I mean, he has aged 20 years. Yeah.

Sons of Anarchy. Yeah. Poor guy. White trash family going on there. Yeah, that's depressing. Is that too mean for me to say that there are white trash families? No, I mean, it's Tamara's's family what are you gonna do like you can't just reclassify a species because you want to be more sensitive i know i know um so anyway then um we get to

megan and jimmy getting ready for the big party so this is a good sign we're 20 minutes into the episode and it's time for shannon's party whenever parties start 20 minutes in it's always a great sign yeah good point so megan truth seeker megan has more news she goes jimmy well i want to tell you something i'm not gonna tell you all of it but i'm gonna tell you some of it why you don't want me to get pissed at you? You don't want me to tell you to shut the fuck up or what? Well, basically, I did some digging. Yeah, there's the shock. Digging like a bitch with a bone. Jesus Christ.

Yeah. And so I literally got out a little shovel and was digging in the yard. And I found Haley's bracelet. No. She's like, I did some digging. And so it turns out that one of brooks's exes lives in a small town mississippi and one of my friends lives in that town also and then she got me the number and so i attempted communication and i love how she suddenly

formalizes her her sentence like i attempted communication like she's giving a deposition i wrote sticks together and then like i tried to smoke uh smoke formate words but like it didn't work so i looked on google how to do it because knowledge and then um finally like i called her but i just got her voicemail and he's like you're a dumb bitch yeah i sent her i tried to send her a pigeon but it just kept falling off out of my hands turns out it was just a ball of socks i was like hailey where'd you put the pigeon she's like i ate it and i burned it at the bonfire at our 200-person party. And I was like, Haley, stock market's knowledge. I got another pigeon.

But then the letter I wrote to Haley was, like, so big that when I sent the pigeon out, it, like, fell in the water and drowned. Yeah. And then I tried to send the pigeon to Mississippi, but it went to, like, Havasu instead because it got confused. And then Haley was there having a party. And the pigeon came back and was like, Haley's having a party. And I was like, oh, knowledge. The more you know, the more you like start flying

through a sky with rainbows, right? And for the record, stars don't have rainbow trails because knowledge. I learned that from Wikipedia. Also stickers that I remember on my lunchbox When I was a little girl Because I love knowledge

Can I have a side of Brussels sprouts And then maybe like a basket of knowledge Thanks Can you please be easy on the butter with the knowledge Thanks Thanks Juan I love Juan Juan is my favorite waiter in newport beach

he always valets my car for me too it's so kind of him best dry cleaner ever uh so megan megan at this point is acting insane she has now she's been crazy because one part you forgot well we already talked about it before but one part is where she's like so you know like how i love knowledge so i was on the internet reading blogs and you know how like blogs have comments so i was reading the comments and there was this girl who said she was in a formal relationship with brooks i was like really bitch so you went to a comment section and then search for the person through like their disgust account that's crazy i know all she had to

say was i tracked down his ex and called her but i think she i think i think she thought that by describing the process like she was in true detective or something that it somehow legitimizes it like oh well I just happened to know this and I just happened to know this and I have a friend so I just happened to know this and I called it's like CSI like close up of blog looking hair falling

into the keyboard crack Megan we're oddly enough we're sort of on your side but you're being so crazy. Mark Hellenberger comes in with a flashlight. Hey, Mark. What are you looking for? Because knowledge?

Your real name's Margaret. Knowledge. Margaret Knowledge. I Googled you. Your real name's Margaret. I love knowledge. My favorite part is my nose because it reminds me of knowledge because nose.

I know the nose knows. I should have the right to marry knowledge. I love where it's through. So meanwhile, Jimmy is already like, he's like, why are you doing this? And then Shannon, meanwhile, Shannon's getting her makeup done. She's all nervous.

She's like, well, you know, it's my good friend and I want to support my friend, but I keep hearing things and I don't know, and now I'm in the middle of all this. I'm like, no, you're not. You've actually just... You're only in the middle of it if you choose to be in the middle of it. You could just be like, whatever. I don't care. I believe my friend. Done.

What you should be saying is, Vicky's going through rough times and I don't want to talk about it and I don't want to be in the middle... Oh, goddammit, I'm not in the middle of it. I'm not in the going through rough times, and I don't want to talk about it, and I don't want to be in the middle. Oh, goddammit, I'm not in the middle of it. I'm not in the middle of it yet, but I will be in the middle of it. It's like, Jesus, calm down over there. She inserts herself into it. She's like, oh, hi, Vicky.

I'm sorry. I just can't smile. I can't pretend everything's okay because everybody's saying that you're boyfriend. They act like they're the victim of circumstance. Like, the fates have aligned, and now they're caught in the middle. No, you guys have just basically dug yourself into this. Megan continued to do the research. Shannon continued to entertain it.

And now by them talking to other people, it becomes a thing. And then those other people talk about it. And then they're in the middle. That's why they're in the middle. I don't want to talk about this. So bring a makeup artist in and a hair person that doesn't have any lines and I can just talk about it clearly. What? Keep talking about how you don't want to talk about it.

And then there was like a new brunette lady in there. Yeah, a friend who just sort of stares. Yeah. And Shannon's like, just do my hair like you did the last time. Everybody loved it. David was calling me Jennifer Maniston all day. Jennifer Aniston? Nope.

Jennifer Maniston. He said it very clearly. I wrote it down. I wrote it down here. Sorry, dear. I thought it was funny, dear. Meanwhile, the friend's probably like, I've been sleeping with your husband. Oh, my God.

I didn't want to have to tell you that. He did it again. When I was his best friend. Actually, my favorite thing is at one point, I believe that David walked in and Shannon's like, is everything okay? And he's like, yes, dear. Why? He's so scared. He's like, yes.

Yes. Are you holding my cell phone, dear? I can't find it. Do you have it, dear? Why are you asking? Press my phone. Meanwhile, Shannon's in a great mood, actually. She's walking around, checking out her party.

There's a dragon in the pool. She's like, the dragon's screaming. Let's have fun. I'm like, I think the dragon is just screaming. The dragon's like, get me out of here. Get me out of this pool. Roar. Oh, I love dragons.

Ares loves dragons. Ares are full of alpha snail pupil goo. I'm like, this is the worst episode of Game of Thrones I ever saw. She's like, David, that dragon tried to kill me. Does it remember that I'm its mother? Oh, dragons. I'm telling you. Yes, dear.

I'll remind it, dear. And her new friend, the brunette lady is like wow look Janet there's a dragon in the pool and she's like yes yes I know I know I put it there we ordered it everyone who walks in goes oh my god there's a dragon in the pool she's like yes yes

I've been told there's a dragon in the pool well it was either that or an elephant in the room, and we decided to go with dragon. And the elephant, of course, is the mistress. Megan wouldn't just sit there in the pool stiffly, so we got a dragon. Meanwhile, I love that Shannon's serving Aries teenies. I mean, the whole idea of bastardizing the martini

with some other word has gotten so out of hand. Usually it sort of sounds like an appropriate pun or a portmanteau with a martini. But Aries teeny, it doesn't even flow. Here's an Aries teeny. It's like that's just like the worst slash teeny word i've ever heard well shannon's had so much vodka that it's just an emotion now it's like a you know it's like just a description like well i'm an aries so i'll have an aries teeny oh i'm feeling disappointed i'll have a disappointed teeny here's my here's one of david's drinks it's called an infidelity

with my best friend, Teenie. Here I am. I'd like to order a watching a chandelier move up and down very slowly and listening to the sound and trying to control the Bluetooth while wondering where my husband is, Teenie. Please. Thanks. I'll have another overly fatty and sugary sauce

from the gastropub, Teenie, please. Thank you very much. Just bring me something lighter. Are the french fries lighter, or is the lettuce without meat dressing? Okay, I'll have the french fries. That sounds great. Lighter. Tinny.

Thank you. The description is actually two pages long. It's just the title. Tinny. So anyway, probably the highlight of the entire episode is that Megan and Jimmy walk in and megan starts to wave and jimmy goes you're waving at no one and then she just shrugs she's like what what it's like he is such an asshole for taking her down and she is such an idiot for waving at no one the more we see them them together, I really, honestly, I know this is going to have some disagreement from all ends, but I'm kind of seeing his point. He's like, just shut up.

What are you doing stalking people? Oh, for Christ's sake. Oh, yeah. Shut up, woman. I said shut up. Just shut up. Remember when we agreed that if I say shut up, shut up, and she's like, okay. So when he says, like, shut up, and she's like, why?

And he's like, because I said so. When he does shit like that, they've probably had that discussion a million times where he's like, please, if you're going overboard, I'll tell you to shut up. Exactly. But that being said,

you know, you married a trophy wife, so that's what's going to happen. You know, except that don't be like an asshole. But I also understand his exasperation. Oh, they are. They are totally the assholes from SNL. It's Kristen Wiig and Jason Sudeikis. Be doing the assholes. Hey, babe, you want a unicorn?

They're a nice, awful couple. They really are a nice, awful couple. Glad to know them. So, let me see. If I tell you something, can you stay out of it? Oh, no, no. That's Megan. Sorry. So, David, I'm apprehensive.

He's like, why, dear? Okay, dragging a pool, drinks. I have one of Jim telling the guys a joke. He's like, Jim is like with the guys. He's saying, like, so the other day I texted Terry because, you know, like, you know, I had I was in Tahiti and I was like I'm like hey how's it going and they're all like he's like how are the kids and Terry's like I have kids he's like oh man I laughed so loud

another story for the moth forged by Jimmy Edmonds Jimmy Edmonds goes the moth he's like if I had a nickel for I do I literally do have a nickel for... I do! I literally do. Have a nickel for every time I've forgotten that I have kids.

Jimmy Edmonds next door is like, so the other day, I went to the shower and there were like some towels there and there was a little one and I was like, this one's so small, it could fit in my hand. And then Megan's like, that's what's called a hand towel. And I was like, oh oh my god that's hilarious

I laughed for three days people were like what are you laughing at and I was like I can't even I can't even describe it brah like a towel that was on the ground he's like yeah I've never seen my kids

everyone at the moth is just clapping. So that was their lighthearted interstitial. And then it comes back to... Party areas. Snail spinal fluid drinks. Shannon's like, I don't want to talk about this. I was on the internet. So, to clarify,

what you're saying is that Brooks, Brooks basically is Brooks and Vicky arrive, right? Yeah. And they, they call Megan and Jimmy aside to the living room to discuss. Oh my God. Brooks going off in the car on the way to this party.

Oh yeah. That too. That too. Sorry. So they're getting ready at home and vicky's like oh it's a big party the season was supposed to be over something's going down all right i'm putting on fur all right it's gonna be a summer party outside i'm putting on my best fur but just to call her this time they don't deserve the whole fur he's like well i can, you know, I appreciate your love. What I don't appreciate are people making friends with me in my face that I've known for a couple of times and then going on the Internet and Googling me. You shouldn't be able to Google somebody on the Internet. Well, you know, my fur will deflect it.

So just stay calm. I'll tell you. This drink is calming me down, but not like it's going to calm me down to tell off that woman. Thank God. Thank God that there's one thing you should do when you've got cancer. It's drink alcoholic beverages regularly on television. The only thing I search my heart for is your name, Bix. She's like, oh, gosh, I'll keep you forever, okay? Your teeth feel okay?

Okay. No, I'm not holding it against you. Get in the car. So. He's steamed the whole way. He is mad. What should I say? He is mad because she's about to expose him. Yeah, she's obviously about to expose him.

Because normally he's, like, very calm. But now that she's getting too close, because of knowledge, that he's like very calm but now now that he's getting she's getting too close because of knowledge that uh he's mad yeah so they get there he pulls them aside right can i talk to you and your lovely wife for a moment i have a model home to show you yeah welcome welcome to my living room i'll sit on this couch and vicky will sit on this couch and split you i was like this is not a talk show. They were sitting in this weird way like these church evangelicals and he's like, I believe in

feeling hearts of people that are near me. How do you feel? And he's dressed, by the way, like he's in a Tylenol commercial. He should be walking on a diagram of pain. His black blazer and black t-shirt. He's like, four out of five doctors recommend Tylenol and the fifth one

is the one i see for my cancer also i invented the iphone there's like a there's like a diagram of a man with back pain and he's walking by it tylenol fix all this brooke and uh vicky's like i didn't know girls could get hard hands but there you go my dress lifted up like a tit so anyway i love that so when brooks is talking to me he's like it would be or i don't know if he's talking to them or was it or the interview but either way he says it would be the lowest of the low to fake cancer it's's like, but you know, you are kind of the lowest of the low. So, all right, I guess you're faking cancer. Okay. Yeah, I'm not sure if that was an admission or not.

But yeah, the lowest of the low would be faking it. But right there, right above it is telling people that you're faking it. Too bad that's too long for a bumper sticker. I don't know. Maybe rethink that one bro yeah he's like well but i guess i am lo so you got me cancer and i like that in the interviews with us he's like i am fuming mad i'll tell you what fights cancer anger and megan is helping heal this body right now yeah and he's like fuming mad but But then when it comes to them, he's like selling them a fucking

Bible. He's like, well, I would love to have some fellowship with the two of you about why you feel it's so necessary to have fellowship with my Google search history. Young lady. I love truth.

Well, I'm a lover of knowledge. That's what she says but also Vicky's like well I love fake fur we all love a lot of things you know it doesn't give you the right to wear it to a

oh well never mind okay go ahead Megan so then but then it becomes like a general thing where Megan's saying well you know you were attacking my marriage

and did you say this did you say that and I love that at one point Megan is rehashing and she goes well you know you told my husband

I'm evil and Vicky's like you are and she's like you told my husband I'm evil. And Vicky's like, you are. And she's like, you told my husband I'm a terrible person. Yeah, well, yeah, you are too. But you told me, you said that we were going to be divorced in like three months. Well, technically probably two months. Vicky's like, yeah, okay, and, and, and? And Vicky was staying so calm.

I don't know if she's drugged up, fed up. I don't know what's going on, but she was so eerily calm this entire scene. Instead of screaming and yelling, she's drugged up, fed up. I don't know what's going on. But she was so eerily calm this entire scene. Instead of screaming and yelling, she's just like, well, that's true, Megan. You know, you are a horrible person. Oh, well, yes, I did. Well, actually, yeah, I said, you know, one day that and then he'd leave your cheat on you. Yeah, I did say that because that's true.

Well, you were mean to me. So, like, I went on Google like I was mad. I lashed out. Sorry. Yeah. And then and then, you know brooks and vicky are getting really annoyed and then jimmy jimmy is actually the vicky whisperer because he what he does is all right i think that what megan's saying is just that you know you're saying you had cancer and she didn't understand why you didn't have cancer and then she went and looked it up because she's curious and that's it she just looked and that's it and it's over it's

over right babe it's over shut the fuck up trying to help you yeah and now she's gonna help herself by shutting the fuck up right babe i think i think that's it you know whatever and megan's like you know megan's like i'm not gonna apologize for like getting thirsty and then drinking a glass of truth. Like, yeah, I'm sorry. I'm not going to apologize. Like if someone has cancer and then she actually does make a good point to us when she said if someone is watching this at home and they have cancer and they're watching this douchebag on TV saying, well, yeah, I have cancer and it's being healed by a pill you can get in the Walmart. Just take a lot of it. It's irresponsible. Yeah, she's saying like he's on you know, he has a national platform.

Yeah, that's her best case actually of all. I'm surprised it took so long to get that out there because we haven't even really talked too much about that and if anything, that is absolutely right. It is really irresponsible. Yeah, so it took her a while, but she finally got a good one.

She's like, I'm not going to apologize to helping poor people who only have a TV as their doctor. I'm not going to apologize for healing them. Okay, sorry. So then Megan takes this opportunity to say, Brooks, didn't you tell... I can't even remember the trail of it. Brooks, did you tell Tam – did you tell Vicky that – what was it? I know what the lie is. The thing is that Brooks –

It was so convoluted. Eddie. Wait, something like did you tell Eddie when you were golfing – Did you tell someone while you were golfing or did you tell someone while you were golfing that Jimmy said that he's been married for four months but only two months have been happy or something? Yeah. And he's like,

nope. Nope. Consider the source. Consider the source. Consider the source. And then Megan's like, are you saying Tamara has no credibility? I'm like, are you saying that a frog's ass isn't watertight? Big business. Big business.

Yeah, of course Tamra has no credibility. I mean. Is this how we dress at the office now? You look like a blood clot. Yes, of course Tamra has no credibility. And when that's your argument, you're in trouble. That's the thing. It's like you can never pick a side on these shows

because they're all so dumb I don't know when Tamra ever had credibility and for Megan to think that there ever was a shred of credibility is hilarious Tamra has as much credibility as she's probably got credit probably it's just wrecked

it started out with a bad subscription to that columbia tapes yeah and it just went downhill from there yeah she she makes wikipedia look like it's been codified in stone okay this is tamra tamra tamra you know she's the one who would be applying for the Pornhub scholarship. Okay. So she, Megan runs right inside, of course. And it's like, Tamara, okay. Well, no, no, no. Before she does that.

Oh, what'd I miss? Megan, again, it's like, please just stop asking questions about this. And Megan says, I will continue to ask questions about cancer until there's a cure. Which is so stupid that she wraps this all up. This gossipy cause as if it's in some sort of highfalutin

sanctimonious quest for the truth. We can stop marching when cancer can get married, okay? And until then, I'm marching. Right? You don't just put a crossword puzzle down, like, halfway done. You Google the answers until it's finished, okay? So then Megan goes off, and then Vicky goes, she makes my ass tired.

This is where Vicky starts getting desperate because she's so mad that she wants to explode. And so she's going to start saying stupid things. She's like the Hulk trying to keep her shirt on. She's like, I'll just walk by really fast and say, that girl's going to make my ass explode. And then that's it. That's all I'm saying. I'm not doing this. Well, it should make my ass tired, too.

That girl makes my ass tired. She's like just getting, you know, I know the feeling. Like when you're just desperate for something to say and anything comes out. I can't even come up with anything at that point. That's like me during half the podcast. That's how I feel, too. All my jokes are like, I don't even know if that was English. We sit here and make fun of all these people with their terrible English, and I'm like,

Well, you know, being a hypocrite is half the point, don't you think? I know. It's how we celebrate these shows. So the very first thing that Megan does is she goes off the camera. And even Vicky's like, oh, well, there she goes. There she goes. And Megan's like, well, I told Brooks. I asked Brooks, did he ever say to Eddie that my marriage is in trouble?

And he's like, no, consider the in trouble and he's like no consider the source and tamra's like consider the source we were both on different couches and then brooks was on one side and then jimmy was on the other side and they were asking me things and i was like talking about google and i was like google google i went on google and then i looked at his name and i read these comments and there was this girl and he got mad and then he started saying some poem and then vicky's really calm i'm really scared of her. And then Dave says something about you. And Tamara's like, bitch! Consider the source.

Oh, my God. Just start screeching. Consider the source! Oh, my God. And then the woman on the quest to Christ. This is her first step. Yeah, she starts just screeching. And then people are kind of talking sense into her.

I mean, people come up to her like nurses on ER. They're like, here's a blood bag. Here's a scalpel. It's like, no, no, bitch. Stay away. Consider the source, bitch. Oh, my God. And then she finally confronts Brooks.

You can be Tamara, I'll be Brooks. Okay. Whoa, Brooks! Brooks, you got something to say, Brooks? Bitch! No, I've said everything I have to say. I'd rather consider the source, huh? Huh?

Like, you're just calling me a dumb bitch because you're like, consider the source from the dumb bitch, so I'm a dumb bitch. All I'm saying is consider the source. So what are you saying? Consider the source? Consider the source. Maybe you should be clear about it. But,

because I'm your biggest supporter, bitch. I'm the one, like, supporting you. Like, that psychic was like, his cancer's fake. And I was like, what?

I mean, come on, bitch. What? Consider the source. All I'm saying is consider the source. What I love is that she, she kept on being like, what does it mean? What does it, what bitch. What? Consider the source. All I'm saying is, consider the source. What I love is that she kept on being like, what does it mean? What does that mean? Consider the source. You think I'm lying? Consider the source.

I didn't say that. Consider the source. What are you saying? What are you saying? What are you saying? Just say it. Just say it. Meanwhile, cut to Eddie. He's sitting there eating a bowl of rice with chopsticks, looking back and forth, just enjoying this. He's like, can't wait to get back to cut fitness yeah through the entire

scene they show him eating at the beginning of the fight and his eyebrows raised and you think oh Eddie's interested but he's not he's raising his eyebrows because that's what you do when you're opening your mouth to put food in it yeah loved it and then they fought and they fought

yeah it was just a non-spectical fight He's like you don't have a right to go on Google She's like what bitch what's the source bitch Say it to my face And just screaming And then Vicky's Vicky's just like a tired mom At the end of the day of a factory shift

That was 19 hours of work She's like oh Tamara Why you do this? Just why? Yeah, Vicky was, I was surprised because I was waiting for Vicky's crazy voice to come out, and it started to, but even Vicky was like, I can't.

I mean, she's like, not in front of the dragon. Not in front of the dragon. And Tamara is just holding onto her sleeve like a little kid following her around like oh Tamara just stop already

Tamara's like a little kid having a fight and they're just walking together by the pool and Vicky's like oh enough you're not gonna get that toy just stop just screaming in the aisle looking like an idiot oh really an idiot of a source is that what you're calling

me? A dumb bitch source? And then the episode just ended. They didn't even, they're like, whatever. We'll just end this now. But the next week, still, oh my god, this show, even the next weeks are hilarious. Heather's sketching like some Property Brothers

style window tree thing. She's like, what do you think about my sketch, Terry? I'm like, wow, that looks like a fascinating episode. I'm in. Yeah. He's like, well, the birds look funny. And she's like, shh. He's like, I don't even remember I have kids.

It's not funny, Terry. From Wondery, this is Black History For Real. I'm Francesca Ramsey. And I'm Conscious Lee. What do most people think about when they hear the words Black History? Rosa Parks, Reconstruction, MLK, February, Black History Month. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories of Black History that we just are not really talking about or thinking about, especially outside of February.

And we are about to flip the script on all of that. Because on this show, you're going to hear a little less. In August 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue. And a little bit more. She is a heroine to some as a fighter for black rights. She is a villain to others. Follow Black History for Real on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere on February 5th, or you can listen early and ad-free on Wondery Plus starting January 29th.

Join Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Black is beautiful. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, played by HBO's Industries' Myhala Herald, a brilliant scholarship student who has to quickly adapt to her newfound eat or be eaten world. Ava's ambitions take hold and her small town values break in hopes of becoming the first scholarship student to make The List, Bishop Gray's all-coveted academic top 10, curated by the headmaster himself. But after realizing she has no chance at The List on her

own, she reluctantly accepts an invitation to a secret underground society that pulls the strings on campus life and academic success. If she bends to their will, she'll have everything she's ever dreamed of. But at what cost? Academy takes you into the world of a cutthroat private school where power, money, and sex collide in a game of life and death. Follow Academy on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Academy early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus. Yeah, I'm excited.

I'm very excited. No, I was. I'm excited. Yeah, I'm excited. I'm very excited. No, I wasn't. I'm excited. Excited for the show. Hate your guts. Hope you die. What do you mean, match? Consider the source.

Ryan's in the back, by the way, Instagramming this. I love this show. I love it. And it looks like it's just... Next week, all the women look like they are going to be politely confronting Vicky about Brooks. It's just going to be just a disaster.

I mean, like you said, the season should be over by now, but it keeps going. I think they came back to shoot it because all the shit was going on in the blogs. Yeah. No, it's been great. I'm sure there's probably like two or three episodes left. But so far so good. I'm going to have Madison here the entire time it's david loves being intimate with maniston here what can i say all right so let's move on to marriage to medicine

let's do it bian let's do it so um the episode opens up on mariah reading a book which i thought was funny that she was reading something and um I also thought it was funny that the episode opened on her. She's not even a full-time cast member, but she has clearly come back to take her place in the cast. Well, to be fair, it didn't open on her. It actually opened on the behind-me, as Amy would say, Best Western Hotel. Yeah, that's true. It opened on this shot. You know, usually it's like luxury shot of luxury hotel.

It was like cable with the seat out. Yeah, exactly. It was hangers that were locked in. There were lots of Aiken E's. Yeah. And so Mariah, so I was like, wow, look, there's Mariah reading. And then she's like, oh, honey, I'm reading. Think like I'm trying to think like a man.

And she's like, yeah, Steve Harvey. I like does steve harvey really deserve the ass queen treatment i'm not sure i'm not dating any more men who don't respect me up front honey like uh you know that's not what's happening right now uh you're married for you steve harvey get out of here so she's doing that and then heavenly she starts telling us about how lovely it was to have a room to herself at which point she unleashes the cackle of all cackles which of course I recorded

but I kind of enjoy getting to know myself a little better somewhere a dolphin is like, what? Somewhere there's a very scared canister of hand sanitizer. Yes. There's some dial shrinking away from the sink. Listen, I know Haley Steinfeld has a song about masturbation out right now, but we don't need Heavenly to be taking it to the next level. At least not

telling us about it. That's an image we do not need. Yeah, I'm all for masturbation. Do it with your windows closed. And your internet off. And I hope that she doesn't make those noises when she does it. Daddy! Daddy!

I can't get my voice high enough to do that Heavenly is hilarious Every clip they show of Heavenly Is funnier than the last She is firing on all cylinders This season she's like I'm going to be shady In all my interviews and I don't care She will find anyone

And throw them under the bus During anything They'll be like so Heavenly what do you think about bottled water She's like oh I like bottled water. I think it's nice. I like the way it tastes. You know, I'm not like Quad who drink in dirt, you know. I'm a lady.

We're just asking about bottled water. Some whores love to drink water out of the tap of a bathroom that they've never been in, but I know Miss Quad. What? She's like Quad but with insults. Yeah, exactly. Meanwhile, speaking of...

Speaking of water and Quad, we then cut to Dr. Jackie walking along with Quad, and once again, Quad makes a very mundane comment, but tries to make it sound intellectual, because they're talking about the ocean. and Quad's like well you know the water is

a very tranquil place to be I don't know I'm like and then Jackie goes well yes the water can be tranquil but you know it can also be your enemy and Quad's like oh my weave

no she means like people drowning or tsunamis you know ocean yeah quad i know so the water is a tranquil place to be but it's a very tranquil place to be like oh what a what a wonderful observation quad Wonderful observation, Quad. And then this turned into Jackie. Quad, I am so proud of you for the way that you handled dinner. They cut to dinner and Quad's like, now I know I'm not perfect, but at least I'm good enough to admit that I'm not perfect. She's like, give me, I know I'm not perfect, but give me a little credit for trying. That's from Soap Dish, Bob. Best that I know how. The best mother that I knew how to be.

I know that. I know that speech. I know that line. Soap Dish. Give me a little credit, won't you? For being the best mother I knew how to be so anyway um uh so while quad is waxing poetic about how tranquil water can be uh later mariah and simone go to meet with this reverend and this lady about um this charity this charity thing that they're going to do

where they're going to do blood pressure testing and diabetes screening and all this stuff. For like two hours. Yeah, and they're talking. Okay, you're going to show up and you're going to give 37 medical procedures to people with diabetes. Okay, thanks for coming. Mariah's like, well, I'm glad we can all be good people

and yes it was my idea because I think these ladies need to learn what apology means in a manly way think like a man yes Steve Harvey no but the best part is while they're meeting with these charity directors they are talking about how not only to look into diabetes and this nap but that there's a lot of poverty and they have to feed the impoverished. Yes, feed everyone, blah, blah, blah. The reverend and the lady walk away. And then there's a cheese plate with a big cheese plate in front of them. And then they're like, someone's like, well, I think I may eat some of the cheese and grapes.

I'm like, well, you better eat all of it, actually, if you're just talking about feeding the poor. And then you leave over a giant plate of grapes and cheese. I mean, it was like an Albertsons trade, but still. Still, it's like, don't go talking about how you're going to feed the poor, how there's a big poverty issue. And then you're just going to pick out the little giant cheese plate in front of you. Jesus. It's like, I cannot wait to pass out the crackers. She's eating like cheese and grapes.

And also when they all get on this bus and there's a speech about all the services and some shade with Heavenly. And we can go over all of that. But I just love that at one point, Moriah goes, all of us are coming together. And, you know, I have fed one time. We went somewhere. I forget where. And we fed 5,000 people in one day. Yeah, in Bangladesh.

We fed 5,000 people in one day. I was like, what? No. And what did you feed them? Just because you handed out a whole bunch of bags of potato chips and said one per person does not mean that you fed 5,000 people, okay? a whole bunch of bags of potato chips and said one per person does not mean that you fed 5,000 people, okay? A pretzel has the calorie intake

needed to get through the two hours that we were in Bangladesh. And we handed out 25, I can't do math, was it 25,000 pretzels? I don't even know where I am anymore. I don't know. I thought that was an interesting claim. Yeah, 5,000 people. But then she goes,

if we can only have one family today, though, we've done our job. I'm like, no, actually, there's like 15 people on a bus worth a ton of money. The gas alone could have helped five of those families. Shut up. You're going to help more than one family. Stop patting yourself on the back. Yeah. And by the way, if you feed 5,000 in bangladesh then let's show up for the

bahamas then okay like don't be just feeding 10 people all right get your cheese plate cut it into a bunch of pieces and give it to 5 000 people in the bahamas please oh heavenly oh i was gonna say heavenly because then heavenly is like yeah well i've never heard of nobody doing a charity on a vacation but okay we'd love to do it this once this once yeah

so then no one even hides it they don't want to do it I know so then some of the ladies go for a walk on the beach. We see Toya's hips. Woo, Toya. I never realized how much of a booty she has. Wow.

They're walking on the beach, and they're talking about Jill, and Heavenly's like, I don't think it's appropriate to attack anyone. How do they make their money? I'm like, lady, you just got into a whole big fight because you were calling strippers whores okay and then she even says all of her trouble has been yelling at people for how they make their money exactly and then she even says everybody yeah she just she even says and i didn't even make fun of those strippers i'm like no that's exactly what you did don't you remember the fight you had jill and her husband? That's how this fight started.

She's too stupid to even have a fight. And she's like, I'm not gonna fight with someone with that intelligence to fight! I'm like, ugh, shut up. So then they talk about Jill, and this is my favorite, and Toya's like, oh, but, you know, can't she have a fraudulent slip? Can't she have

a fraudulent slip? What she should have did was not have a fraudulent slip. Because fraud is illegal. And slipping is bad for you. We only have an ambulance, but I'll still put on the siren and come after you. Eugene, come help Jill. She had a fraudulent slip. Get her in the ambulance.

Somebody stole Jill's identity with fraudulent. Someone gives Jill a slip that doesn't work. It fell apart under her dress. Someone used my identity in a horrible scheme. Blink, blink. In a pyramid scheme. I'm having fraudulent slips. So then Jill comes up and they talk about, I i don't know shoes or something this show is such

trash and so every second so heaven i'm heavenly's being really nasty to jill and she's like ah she's like i can't have intelligent conversations with people who aren't intelligent i'm like also with people who are intelligent you just can't have intelligent conversations, Heavenly. Let's be honest. But please, keep trying. Yeah, and Jill's like, oh, I can reach you, baby doll. I can reach you. Blink, blink, blink. Blink. What are you saying?

This is another example today of, what are you saying? I don't get it. She's like, you're stupid. What do you mean? You're an idiot what what are you trying to say to me you're fucking stupid see where and i hate you i hope you die what yeah but then finally like five minutes into it she goes wait a minute you're saying i'm stupid yeah and she's like you're a dumb bitch You're saying I'm stupid. Yeah. And then she's like,

You're a dumb bitch. You're a dumb fucking bitch. And then Heavenly's response, she goes, You're mama. That was my favorite. Oh, okay. We're going to take it to the 90s.

Okay. You're mama. The show. She goes, I didn't call you. I didn't say you were, what'd she say? I didn't say you were stupid, I said you weren't

intelligent, and I'm not gonna have a conversation with somebody not intelligent, like, yeah, dumb bitch! Oh, this show is so stupid And then Lisa tells Toya to get Jill under control, and Jill's like, I can

get myself under control, I didn't throw water and hit someone. Which, you know, good point. Yeah, exactly. But then Heavenly... Oh, sorry. No, no, go ahead. I was just going to say they start walking away.

And Tori is like, well, you know, part of what I should have done. I love that Jill's so outspoken but you know because she's just a white like something like she's just a little white girl and they'll totally take advantage of her she's like yeah i'm happy because she's not like a typical white girl who just got taken advantage of she speaks her mind i was like that was funny and true And then And then Heavenly She's still being so shady She's like I'm not going to have a conversation With a four year old

Toya can do it because y'all are on the same level Oh just going after Toya now And she's like I'm not going to fight with some Uneducated She has two degrees She must have sucked every dick in that department because I don't see

how she could earn degrees did she suck that dick I'm like oh my god like talking about how you won't go to a certain level while calling someone a whore with two degrees because they sucked enough dick to earn them

I know golf clap heavenly is looking for a fight I'm on a horror with two degrees because I sucked enough dick to earn them. I know. Golf clap. Heavenly is looking for a fight. I mean, they keep showing a clip of this fuck you incident where Jill, who is misconstrued,

she's heard it wrong. She tells Toya, I think my husband got in a fight with Heavenly's fight. I think my husband apparently said fuck you to him. And then Toya like oh I think my husband got in a fight with Heavenly's fight I think my husband apparently said fuck you to him and then Toya's like oh hey Jill you hear I mean Heavenly you hear this and then Heavenly's like wait your husband said fuck you to mine and then

she's like I think so and then Heavenly gets and then when Heavenly finds out the truth instead of Heavenly coming back and be like no no no it turns out everything was fine and she was like you're trying to drum up things you're trying to drum up things it's like no Heavenly you were the one who tried to drum up things and you've been angry ever since because you drummed up and you're blaming jill for doing it jill just heard something wrong yeah and jill was a drama queen i'm sure and so was her husband her

husband was probably like yeah this guy came up to me and tried to confront me in front of the other guys fuck him and she's like oh my, my husband said fuck you to her husband. Yeah. You know, she's a drama queen, but who cares? Yeah. Heavenly's just. But Heavenly should have just diffused it and been like, no, nothing happened. And then Toya, why is everybody fighting?

Maybe because you keep repeating immediately after you hear it, everything. Yeah. Everything. So then, meanwhile, while this is all happening the guys are are out getting conk it's a recurring theme on our bravo shows um they're getting conk and they're all being guys be like wow the women bicker my favorite was quad's husband he's like why do the ladies do these things i'm like dude you're the one who's a psychiatrist you're supposed to be telling us how about about you fix things?

You're a psychiatrist dating a visibly crazy person. Yeah. Married to a visibly crazy person. Why are you asking us this? You're the one who's supposed to be trying to figure out maybe some of the patterns here and fixing it. Yeah, they're just all so full of shade. And he's asking for answers from other people's spouse, which I guess is kind of the theme of this episode. But he's like, why are these women so crazy it's like you are with quad okay no one can explain there's a difference between men and women blah blah blah but there's a difference between quad

and like everybody like we can't explain that to you over lunch exactly and then the doctor they're like so what are you going to do about this situation with the other doctor and he's like well i prefer not to discuss this because that wouldn't be fair to him and i believe that he deserves my full respect and attention and then to us he deserves every amount of i will talk to him personally yeah if i care which i don't because he's left a bad taste in my mouth and yeah that guy's that guy's an asshole that guy for sure is a cocky ass a little bit so then we go back to the beach and uh jill is what walks up with is with toya walks up to lisa nicole and heavenly and it looks like jill is trying to make things right she's like she's like listen i misunderstood i thought my guys guys i thought my husband said why can't we just why can't we just get past it guys guys i just thought my husband said fuck you maybe you should have

it's like oh god here we go again and then that's when it was like, okay, Jill, you are very dumb in this situation. You are exacerbating a situation that you don't have to. Or as Lisa Nicole said, You know, sometimes I listen to you and then I think, what is this dumb blonde thinking? Jeez, sometimes just be quiet. Okay? Yeah. geez sometimes just be quiet okay yeah oh with her little little lisa nicole voice on jill it's like please don't talk to each other ever yeah that's too much so what's hilarious though is that later when jill is with um her husband she's explained the whole thing and she's like well i

got i just get mad because i'm jersey and's like, you realize that's not an excuse. Like, you can't. Just because you're Jersey doesn't mean you can be a crazy woman. And she's like, but it's in my blood. It's also the way that people have become famous on Bravo for years. Exactly. It's like that guy saying that was a bombshell. It's like that guy saying that was a bombshell.

It's like no one on Bravo up to this point has ever realized that you just because you're from Jersey or from wherever that you have license to be a crazy person. I don't know. This entire network is challenging that notion. Yeah. So then we have the charity thing, which was weird because we're seeing Actual medicine on this show Yeah This is blood pressure And you need to eat better

And you need to Eat less Now here's the Snickers bar Good luck with your diabetes We fed one Snickers bar to ten families All in a day's work. We satisfied the entire Caribbean with Snickers.

That satisfies. Yes, we got. Yeah, there was some medical stuff, I guess. And then, I don't know. This fight is so ridiculous, but these ladies just kill me. I mean, part of the fun is just seeing what Heavenly is going to say and not say at the same time because she's so dumb. She can't speak a sentence together.

And I love hearing all the different word combinations she comes up with. Oh, yeah. What about the... I'm looking through my notes here. What about the car ride on the way to the charity thing? And Mariah and Lisa, Nicole and Tori. And Tori is like, I'm going to drive. So if I were to kill Mariah, I could just stare at the road.

She can't read my eyes. She's been reading Steve Harvey. What I should have did was take my driver test in the Bahamas. Because that way I wouldn't have been penalized for driving on the wrong side of the road so much. They don't have third signals here. Eugene, look, you can drive your ambulance anywhere you want on the road.

So they're driving and Lisa Nicole's like, well, it's very lovely to spend time with you, Mariah. And Mariah, speaking of Pocahontas as we were earlier, is there in like this American girl Pocahontas braid, weird curved braid thing and acting like a queen in the passenger side. And she's like, yes, well, I figured we would join a charity, honey, and at least try to figure out what to do in each other's presence or something. And Tori is just laughing like, now there's the Mariah I like, that's just shady and fun. That's who I like. That's the Mariah.

I love that one. Straight ahead, serious. Straight ahead. I liked how in the bus with everyone else, Heavenly once again said something really shady about Jackie. And then Jackie's husband, he basically gets the attention of Heavenly's husband and is like, hey, could you tell your wife not to talk to

my wife that way he's like yeah sure basically just making fun of the women for being like women talk to women men talk to men it was good i love i actually i love jackie's i don't talk to me uh yeah i like jackie and her husband, too. Yeah. They're like a nice little dose of normal in between the screaming like you're a C word of each other. Yeah. And so after all this charity, that's when Quad has another one of her moments. She's like, oh, the charity, you know, all the bickering and all the fighting.

It's all so small, so small. And then she does this like dramatic fake cry off to the side. I'm like, Quad, you realize you're the one starting all this shit, right? She turns her head. Turns her head. And pretend cries. What do we do? We fight.

For no reason. We don't know what we do. We just do it. Why? Why? Why, Annie Lennox? Why? Bring a kiddie pool.

A kiddie pool full of water, which is a tranquil place. A very tranquil place to be. Many things have transpired. One of the largest of which has been the entrance of tranquil water into a kiddie pool. I'm glad we're not in Africa, because tranquil water brings mosquitoes, which kills many children, and we would just be fighting while children died. When the children cry, let them know we try. Because when the children sing

I don't remember the rest of that song Have you ever heard The wolf cry to the newborn wind The sycamore tree And the colors of the wind How High Does the sycamore tree grow

You could have told me I would never know Quiet and defer deal does the sycamore tree grow? You could have told me, I would have never known. Quiet on the daffodil, Jill. Jill, Miss Daffodil, honey. Have you ever painted the colors of the wind on a daffodil, Jill? That's what I'm talking about.

Quiet on the daffodil, Jill. Me and Miss Jill, the daffodil has it, honey. Anyway, so the episodes came to an end with some relationship exercises on the beach. Oh, yeah. This was pretty good. I thought we were

done. No, this was actually like the whole meat of the thing. Okay, Simone's like, since we all talk about each other's relationships anyway, I thought it might be fun if we tell someone else's man our problem and get their advice. So they had to get advice from each other's husband

about their problems and they went deep. Yeah. As Shannon would say, she went deep. She went further than I would ever go. Miss Megan King Edmonds, not just a car phone. It's an entire portfolio. Miss

Lady Doctor. So the first one up was that was that mariah i think it was heavenly heavenly was saying yeah talking to you want me chained by the sink but i have. I have apps. Daddy? He has apps. Daddy? Daddy, I want to put GPS in my app, Daddy. I have dreams, Daddy. I have dreams, and then I'm going to go home in a room alone and have special time with my dreams. But I kind of enjoy getting to know myself a little better. Oh, Heavenly. And that was Jackie's husband, right? a little better.

Oh, heavenly. And that was Jackie's husband, right? That she was talking to? Maybe. Yeah, I think so. He's so, like, perfect husband answer. He's like, well, you know,

respect is a two-way street, hon. And I respect your time, but I want you to respect the family. It's like the perfect thing. And she's like, but amps! And jobs! jobs and desks, daddy. Daddy, Starbucks free download of the week, daddy. I'm not staying at home and missing that, daddy.

And he's like, you're beautiful and respect goes two way she's like i love you and uh who else even went did tori even go i don't think she went nicole lisa nicole was the next one yeah just lisa nicole and she's like darren and who was who was she talking what unlucky bastard husband oh what's his name oh yeah, yeah. So he used to crazy. Aiden. Who finally took off his Gilligan hat for the scene. It's like, oh, no, Aiden. No, don't do it, Aiden. But she had to talk to him.

And she's like, Darren, sometimes when you cheat on me, it hurts my feelings. But then you still keep lying. You know, I'll say, where are you? And you'll say, the store. And then I'll say, where are you? And you'll say, the store. And then I'll say, what did you buy at the store? And you're like, I had sushi and a Diet Coke. And I'm like, Darren, stop lying. And he's like, well, you know, sometimes when I don't tell you things, it's because of how you'd react.

I'm not going to tell you I'm at the strip club because I know that you're going to be upset that I'm at the strip club. Do you understand? And she's like, no, you're still lying. That's still lying. Then if I tell you, you're going to be mad. It's like not, it's never just don't do it. Yeah. You know?

Yeah. You know what that is? That's like a broken marriage. Because she was right. She was like, if you don't have trust, then you don't have a marriage. And that doesn't sound so great, Lisa Nicole. And, you know, it sucks because he cheated on you.

And you should not be giving him a pass. You're kind of like breaking up with the wrong person. And what if later he's just like, I didn't hear that. I was zoned out. He was. He looked like he was bored. He's like. And then afterwards, he's like he does the classic thing, which is that he wraps all up in God.

He's like, well, you know, I think that, you know, God put this woman here to test me and if we can get from the lowest low i know in 80 years from now we'll be all the way at the top of the mountain and she'll be right with me and i'll say was weird i'll say excuse me honey i'm gonna go get some gasoline for the car so we can drive higher on the mountain and when when I come back in 10 hours, I'll say, I went to the wrong gas station and she's right there for me with God. But this time I'll smell like peed in M&M's.

Throw her off the scent. He did have a really weird voice. His voice is like deep. And he's like, well, I think that what we need is God. God put us together. And if God wants us together, then

well, you know, our relationship has been nothing but obstacles. Like when he's like, our relationship has been roadblocks and obstacles. Which means when we're 80, we'll be sitting on a mountain of roadblocks he's like election is he's like well you know we've had some obstacles but we've gotten stronger

because of them and by that logic i guess we always want to be stronger so i think we might need some more obstacles so i'm gonna go back to strip club just so that way we get stronger afterwards so that's the only reason why coincidentally there's a speed bump on the way to the strip club so i actually overcame an obstacle yeah i actually made a stronger just by driving fast over the speed bump that i did not see. So we're just always getting stronger and stronger. Darren kind of felt like, he looked like he felt like he'd seen this a zillion times. Yeah. And Lisa Nicole's like,

do you understand what I'm saying? And then Aiden's like, well, actually, I have another meeting right now. I have some place to be right now. And Darren looked so unmoved by the entire thing. He's like, I'm sorry.

I zoned out. I was just thinking about, did I DVR the voice this week? I'm going to have to watch that on my iPad in the room. Yeah, so I don't know if anything got fixed. But, man, these girls go there. They do. Like throwing raw meat in a cage, you know? They're just as nasty as they can be just to do it.

Yeah, well, what else are you going to do at the Comfort Inn? The HBO doesn't work. I'm sorry, but the sign said free HB. I assume that meant HBL. They're like, nope. It meant diabetes. It just meant free honeycombs for breakfast, but we ran out of the C's, so we just did HB. There's some canned fruit in the cabinet.

Well, I'm sure that there'll be many more fun things to happen next episode. But in the meantime, that's it for our episode. You can support us on Patreon, patreon.com forward slash watch what crap ends. Get access to our bonus episode, which was pretty wacky this week. And facebook.com forward slash watch what crap ends. Subscribe to us on iTunes. That way, the podcast, once it is ready, it is going to be on your little device there. Yeah.

Ready for you. Straight to your advice. Just like who makes the issue, darling. That's right. Thank you guys, everybody, for listening and being so supportive. And for everybody who's a part of our community on the Facebook and the Twitter and all that. Thank you for talking to us. So so funny so fun ronnie always a pure delight and you put up with a lot with me i love you for it you're a good guy listen it's just because i've learned to paint with the

colors of the wind ben if you ever you know or something, please give me that poster board and I'll hang it in my fridge, David. David. I put a gold star on your poster board of the colors of the wind, David. I did not know that's something that you wanted, but I guess I'm learning things I never knew I never knew. Oh, David, sycamore. How high

does the sycamore grow? You cut it down down you know what's even crazier we make fun of megan for googling everything but i've really never known how high a sycamore grows and i've never googled it i have no thirst for justice it's truly something you never knew you never knew i'm gonna go on my canoe now and go just around the riverbend what that's not what houses are for Ben okay houses are to live okay did I not teach you that what did I do what went wrong in my mothering I will not stop asking questions about sycamores until things stop growing on this planet knowledge just I learned Spanish and they put question marks backwards sometimes.

And upside down. And even then, I still looked for answers. Backwards answers. And upside down. I look under everything and above everything and in both directions because of all those question marks going in different directions. Do you know how many answers I've read backwards? And then, did you know that in Hebrew, they read from right to left? That's crazy.

Still can't find the answers. That's why U2 is my favorite band. Because I still haven't found what I'm looking for. I'll stop searching when U2 does. Actually, she probably doesn't even know what U2 is Yeah That's the website with the videos on it right? U2?

Where did the B go in U2? I won't stop Until I get an answer Haley probably stole it It wasn't nailed down. Oh, God, Hayley. She probably used it to fake getting a B on one of her tests, but we know it's an F.

Hey, Hayley, I don't care that you got an F, but where's the B in YouTube? Hayley, I want you to go up to Bono and give him back the B for YouTube. Hayley, here's $100. Go out to the mall and then think about what you've done, okay? I'll be doing your homework.

And I don't know what streets you have to take, but according to YouTube, you have to take the streets that have no name. If you see a sycamore, don't ask any questions. You'll be there for hours. It'll just keep growing. Just go to the mall already.

Just go. Don't go on Sunday. Apparently it gets really bloody there. Look out for the car. The car has been rattling and humming lately, according to YouTube. Old lady music. I've been listening to oldies the oldies yeah there's a guy named Bono I looked him up at first I just got a lot of boners but then I realized it wasn't just weird pronunciation justice hashtag justice hashtag i went on to youtube and i said what's up with brooks's

cancer and they said we don't know cancer moves in mysterious ways i was like oh sylvan found your b that you're looking for i can't hailey hailey i'm like Hailey in this scene. Just slack jawed. With a really bad make cap. I went to YouTube and I said, was it the supermarket? And they said, lemons. They have lemons.

So get some lemons, please. Cancer, she wrote. I'm like going through every U2 song. But I still haven't found. That question marks backwards. You're not going to trick me, compadre. Listen up here, Luis. Did you know that YouTube has a calculator and all the results just come out to one?

None of this made any sense until i asked david about it oh my god ben until next time i can't believe we still have ladies of london next time ladies of london and below deck and i think some real house has awards i think we're gonna try to take a look at those oh and the hundreds wait when is the hundred oh that's not until thursday night i had real housewives of new york city yeah all right then well this was sure fun everybody certainly was all right i'm gonna go search for shit yeah all right bye bye knowledge justice next issue is the mobile app that lets you tap directly into the world's most popular magazines anytime, anywhere, using your phone or tablet. The best part? Next Issue is offering a free trial right now when you go to nextissue.com forward slash crappins.

Again, you can try Next Issue for free right now when you go to nextissue.com forward slash crappins. If you like listening to comedy, try watching it on the internet. The folks behind the Sideshow Network have launched a new YouTube channel called Wait For It. It's got interviews with comedians like Reggie Watts, Todd Glass, Liza Schleichinger. Schleichinger, I've been friends with her for 10 years. One of the funniest people out there, and I still have a hard time with the last name, Liza. one of the funniest people out there, and I still have a hard time with the last name, Liza.

Our very own Owen Benjamin, that's me, takes you on a musical journey down internet rabbit holes and much more. You don't have to wait any longer. Just go to youtube.com slash waitforitcomedy. There's no need to wait for it anymore. Because it's here. And it's funny. And I love you.

On Monday, Josh Leibarger made his status, case of the Mondays, followed by a frowny face. It got one like and five comments, including dislike. Well, Josh, Geico also wants to make a comment to turn that emojis frown upside down. In just 15 minutes, you could save hundreds of dollars on your car insurance by switching to Geico. With all that extra dough, why not give Monday a makeover? We see an office party in your future, hosted by you. Hashtag happy face.

Hashtag savings. Geico. 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. Hey, Prime members. You can listen to Watch What Crappens ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen ad-free with Wondery Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey

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