Watch What Crappens - #2265 Southern Charm Hospitality + Below Deck Med Catchup: Fruit of His Talums

Episode Date: December 19, 2023

We start with a mini Below Deck Med catchup before diving into Southern Hospitality (S02E02) Recap, which starts at around 20 minutes in. Maddie can’t decide what to do about her possibly cheating boyfriend and his phone charging irresponsibility, Joey Marbles gets a mancrush, and Leva shows zero forgiveness. This week’s bonus episode is a Trailer Trash breakdown of the Vanderpump Rules trailer. You can get it and or watch this recap on video at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hello listeners, this is Mike Corey of Against the Odds. You might know that I adventure around the world while recording this podcast. And over the years, I've learned that where I stay when I travel can make all the difference. Airbnb has been my go-to place for finding the perfect accommodations. Because with hotels, you often don't have the luxury of extra space or privacy. Recently, I had a bunch of friends come down to visit in Mexico. We found this large house and the place had a pool, a barbecue, a kitchen, and a great big living room to play cards, watch movies, and just chill out. It honestly made all the difference

in the trip. It felt like we were all roommates again. The next time you're planning a trip, whether it's with friends, family, or yourself, check out Airbnb. To find something you won't forget. Hi, I'm Lindsey Graham, the host of Wondry's American Scandal. Our newest series looks at Aaron Hernandez, a star football player who shocked the world with a brutal crime. But behind Hernandez's violent actions lay a much larger health crisis affecting the entire sport. Listen to American scandal on the Wonder App, or wherever you get your podcasts. Oh, I'm so flattered. Oh, but these are all fridgerns. You can't spot happiness, but there's so much that happens. Oh, hello, and welcome to Watch What Happens, the podcast for all that crap we love to talk about on Yeal Braves. Guess who I am, Ronnie.

Hi. And I'm with Ben. He's over there. Hi, Ben. How are you? Hi, Ronnie. What's going on? Nothing. Nothing, nothing. Everybody, welcome. It is Southern Charm Day. We've also got holidays coming up, which is super, yeah, Southern

hospitality day. Holidays are coming up. Super exciting. We hope you guys are getting ready. You're gonna have really good holidays. Our holiday week is gonna be amazing. We've got a four-part holiday recap of a lifetime film. I don't even want to call it a movie. It's a lifetime film. It is called Ladies of the 80s. Ding! Watch it. Come listen to us. We are with the reality gays, Matt and Jake, Matt and Poodle for that one. Super fun. Also that week we will be posting episodes two and three of, or we don't know, probably, of Ultimate Girls Trip, which has been on Peacock and has been super fun. Go listen to episode one now. And our bonus episode this week is going to be about Christmas cooking,

all the cooking, well holiday cooking in general. So what we're doing for these holy days You also if you like cooking and food talk come over and talk to us on that one, okay? We'll be there Ben. What's on your mind today? What's on my mind? Well, I just really enjoyed the shows we're gonna talk about today Southern hospitality really Cracks me up inside talk about the axe. I had to check in with some below deck med. I don't know what's going on with you. What's on your mind? I don't have much on my mind. I'm just, you know, I'm just excited. Chris, Chris, Chris, don't know what's me. Let me tell you one of the elves that would be fired if I was Santa Claus. His name is Kyle. So we're going to start with a little below deck mediterranean and we'll move on to southern hospitality after. If you want

to know when that begins, we can't tell you because that's in the future. We don't know how long this is going to last. But fast forward or look in the show notes because I will put a time code in the show notes today. Below deck metaturinian, wow Kyle is sick again. Isn't that yeah, rocker guys. Kyle can't work because he has a headache. Yeah, he has a headache, a conveniently timed headache. This is, and the headache winds up being the product of dehydration and exhaustion. So it's the stress, it's the stress of everything

and everyone this season that's causing to have this headache that caused him to go to the hospital and to have an overnight at the hospital too for the headache. So that worked out really well for him. How many days has he lost? Although this this cast has been going down like flies. Why can't I remember that expression? Going down like flies, going down like logs, going down like balloons, going down like this cast is going down like a crap and host and a gay bar and real Alan Atlanta. What was that place called? Oh, swinging. We did not go down on anybody. They don't know why I'm being like, he

did not. That was a dirty night. So I was a dirt and that when nobody knows what I'm talking about, but it was fun. We went to this really dirty bar. We went to Atlanta. The bar. We went to Atlanta. The point is we went to a show club. There were a lot of penises swinging around. None of us went down. Well, none of us did not go down, I should say. And it was a wild time.

And the point is that these cast members on this show are going down harder than patrons at certain richards. Okay, there you go. So Kyle. Yeah, Kyle's been sick. Kyle's always sick. He heard his foot.

He heard his this. He did die. He's been in bed for two days. He's depressed. He's taken too much. He just can't handle anymore of the stress Whatever it is that guy spends too much time in bed. You're fucking fired, dude I don't care. I don't care what you're gonna go to human resources with about how much you know how trigger G.R. which gives you legal

Recourse to lay in bed for two days. You're fucking fired. How is he still on this boat? I don't know. I don't know, and I thought that he'd be excited to work this charter because it was Gays and it was Gays from last season. These Gays were awful, awful, awful, awful, awful last year. And this year they're still pretty awful, although I actually think the main gay

who was the lead, the lead awfulness last year. He seemed actually a little bit better to me. He still is like demanding, but I don't feel like he was, like, I don't think he was out of line. Like he asks for medium well steak. And so the first batch that bring up is medium rare to rare. And then the second batch is medium rare to rare And so he has to ask like can I get this medium well like I requested like he's the primer that I don't know why it was hard What you don't think so Mm-hmm is it hard to add because he didn't just say he didn't just say medium well So I can't let this guy off that easily. He said well,, I like medium, but a little above medium,

or like, well, but like a little below well. So basically, there should be different, what do you say, temperatures, different, like, there should be like a plethora of temperatures, something like that. You don't get to just have 20 different temperatures of meat, sir. Would you like it rare, medium rare, medium, medium well, or well? That's enough for you. You don't get to be like flat or whatever. Some medium and some medium well, and then some slightly or whatever. He was served multiple platters of different temperature meat.

I know, but I think that it took way too long for the mediums and the medium wells to come up. And I don't know why they couldn't have been all a variety on the same platter. I don't understand that. But that also, I'm just saying, it's not the most to me, the most irrational thing. And also another thing was, to me came out with this expensive caviar and put the caviar in like the caviar bowl, but then didn't put ice in it. And like, could you put some shaved ice in this? And I'm like, yeah, that's, that is not the guess, the guess are like, can we save this

caviar that you like this nice caviar? Can you at least put it on ice? Come on now. I think that was a little request. Yeah, I think they said they weren't the worst. I think the worst was the pass around twink. The twink, who this isn't. Yeah, he came in this season, feeling empowered. Like last season, I don't remember what his deal was, but this season he's like, no, now I'm going to have opinions.

Yes, and his opinions were stupid. Okay, I think his opinions were stupid. And he was one one he was just complaining to get airtime and he really pissed me off Because they ask for gay Breakfast gay brunch big gay breakfast. What does that mean? I mean, what does it mean? I don't know what exactly Do you mean you want like drag brunch because I would consider that at this point kind of a straight thing? That's like that's what straight people request and straight thing, like that's what straight people request. And I don't know what gay food is. Like what is it?

You know, is it something that's easier to heat with a big giant gay tongue like I have? Or my tongue? I'm just being stupid. Like what is it? What does it give you? Gay food is not a culinary point of view. And so Jack is like, well,

well, I guess I'm just going to, I'm just going to serve like a lot of, a lot of rainbow things. I'm going to make it all colorful. I don't know what it is. So his whole thing is that the special is he's going to make rainbow pancakes. And so the twink is like, that's just like food coloring. Like that's something that like, I could do at home. I'm like, well, congratulations, because there's no such thing as gay food. So rainbow pancakes is what you mean. And they did get, well, a couple things. First off, I think it was being presented with this is the chef's specialty rainbow pancakes. So he was like, why is this a specialty as a fucking pancake, which not a terrible point, but you don't have to be so bitchy.

You know, this is the pancake. Eat your damn rainbow pancake. These, they put more effort into these pancakes, the normal pancakes, so just eat it. The other thing is they got like serving trays that look like Dix, and then they served sausages in the Dix, so I mean. I thought that wasn't good.

That was, wait, what are you gonna do? What are you gonna do? But you know what the other thing is. We can do it. But that being said, those rainbow pancakes were actually deeply sad. They were barely rainbow. And it's like, you widened you,

you can make a rainbow, like a whipped cream. You can't, but you should make like different color whipped cream or some sort of, like I feel like you throw stuff on top to make it look like a rainbow. Maybe make a rainbow of berries or some fruits or who knows what. I don't know.

Yeah. But the twink was being really bitchy unnecessarily about the rainbow pancakes. So they were annoying, but they could have been worse and they had a guy who was super nice to balance it all out. Like one of the guys, they would bitch about everything. Well, first of all, the main guy was like, you know, the food's good. And then the twink would complain and then go, well, the food sucked, but the dessert was good. It's like, yeah, no, you just said the food was good. You don't get to change your mind.

Just based on the most recent twink opinion, sir. But then they had the other friend, the big tall guy, who is like super nice to balance everybody out. And I feel that's how I am when I'm leaving a restaurant with my with my parents or grandparents RIP. I always leave like there's an extra 20 sorry, you know how you do that whenever you're with somebody who's like super pillie. They're like a big pill. Like, oh sorry about that. You're some extra money.

And they did have that guy which was nice and he was nice But then he fell down the stairs at one point so it's like he of course he has a pratfall he of course he gets humiliated and then Ankle heard because I've got the disease of empathy And then they asked for since they wanted a Brazilian steak night they asked for, since they wanted a Brazilian steak night, they asked for Brazilian dancers, even though they're in Italy. They did actually find that Brazilian dancers, relatively easily, there was not even an issue about that. But it's also, again, just one of those things, like, why are you getting Brazilian dancers

if you're going on an Italian holiday? Like I just don't understand some of the requests. Well, also, whose life is that? if you're going on an Italian holiday, like I just don't understand some of the requests. Well, also, whose life is that? Where you're just like, I'm a Brazilian dancer. Here's what me and Megan are gonna do. We're gonna be Brazilian dancers together. So whenever somebody needs Brazilian dancers for party call us and then we'll have two people show up

in big feathers and then we'll shake around a lot. Like what kind of industry, what, you know what I'm trying to say? How much demand is there for Brazilian dancing duo to come dance on a boat? Exactly. I got the hats off. Hats off. And hats back on again for the twink who goes, Muchos Grasias, Muchos Grosios, and like, wrong language, sir. And also bad accent.

And then, uh, The other thing. As a twink, I'm just hiding my head and shame. It's just so embarrassing. I also don't think all of us youth are like that, America. But the other thing, by the way, is if I'm having, like, Brazil, if the theme for the meal, if the culinary theme is Brazilian steakhouse, do I need it to be, do I need this theme to carry on to, like, so, so intensely that dancers have to come on for five minutes to

shake around? I feel like that's, like, above and beyond. I don't do that when I go to a Brazilian restaurant. I'm like, um, are there going to be any dancers coming out with feathers? No, we can get any. Samba? No. I'm not sure this mail's worth it.

Yeah. Okay. So in other news, we had not Laura. Laura, I love Laura. That's not anything surprising. Love her. What's the other girl's name? Lily? Lily. Lily. Okay. So Lily, it was like a miracle show for it was a miracle episode for Lily.

Okay. We started with Captain Sandy calling Lily up to get the talk into. And Lily's like, Hey, it's just listen, Lily. Yeah. Lily, I just want to say, you know what you got to do your work. Yeah. And what I need you to do is maybe do your work, but do it better. Yeah. OK. And then, you know, when you go from here to there, maybe don't have an iPad.

Yeah. OK. And she just kept going, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, Captain Sandy didn't really say much. Y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all. Captain Sandy didn't really say much, except do your job better. I swear to you, it was like pulling a potato sack off somebody's head.

I mean, the woman, it's like suddenly she was free to live her life and she knew how to make beds and she knew how to do laundry and she just came spinning out of it, doing great job. Yes, you really improved. Maybe it's because Kyle wasn't there to distract her or confuse her or whatever, but she did rise the challenge. Lily did well.

Haley still spent the entire episode at the doctor. We didn't see her once. We just heard her voice saying, yeah, I'm just been throwing up all day. Sorry, I can't be there. So that was Haley's update. Nico and Jessica are kissing more. Oh, Katie Flood's coming to town. This is the news.

Katie Flood currently seen a winterhouse. Bravo is suddenly trying to make Katie Flood happen. So Katie is going to be around. And I guess Nico and Katie have some sort of story history. So, that's exciting for the blood heads out there. It goes fucked everybody. Luchas just fucked everybody in the world. I mean, who is that guy not fucked?

At this point, he's cute. But it's a petri dish at this point. It's nobody afraid anymore. So, what happened to good old fashioned fear of disease? Okay. You know, it's not even slut shaming. It's called slut caution. Okay.

I'm gonna start coming out with slut caution signs because listen, you gotta be careful. It's not easy being slutty these days. It never has really been. There's a lot of stuff out there. And Luca is basically like walking into a Costco without wiping your hands on one of the free provided little wipe things that they started putting out after COVID and then just touching random things and then wiping your eyes very

deeply. Don't do it. Have some caution. Use some caution. That's what I say. Right. And then the last thing is just that I can remember, there may be stuff that you remember, but a max. So max, you know, there are, there are, there are deck hand down. So max has to, you know, they just are working a little harder. And max doesn't want to have to like go to sleep at seven, wake up at three and he's pitching him moaning. And so he's all grumpy. And he keeps on saying how tired he is, but then at one point, he like does like the worm into his bedroom. And because don't act like you're tired. And then you do the worm.

Over like a prolonged version of the worm all the way into his bed, even when no one was watching he was still doing the worm. So anyway, there's like, you know, food out for crew. To stop you to say, I approve of Max. And I approve of max is shenanigans

Because max makes me laugh and that's really all I need in somebody and he's gotten better at his job He's not the worst and at least he's making an effort which is more than I can say for Kyle Yeah, so There's some food that's put out for the crew and it's like pasta and there's aparagus and he just doesn't want it So who he goes up? He goes up to like where Captain Sand is and Announces that he has to go find food because there's no food left for him and So everyone just know he's no there's nothing for me. He says there's nothing for me

And she's what do you mean? There's nothing for you said there's nothing for me. I don't like it No, he doesn't even say like you don't like he just says there's nothing for me. He says, there's nothing for me. And she's, what do you mean? There's nothing for you. He said, there's nothing for me. I don't like, no, he doesn't even say, like, you don't like, he just says, there's nothing for me. So then Lara comes up and she's like, this guy is bitching that there's no food there for him, but he, there is. There's pasta right there.

She's, oh, wait a minute. So there was pasta and he said, there's no food. I don't like liars. Okay. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa, can we not, I mean, the guy, part of it's a language thing. I think he just meant like,

there's nothing I like down there. There's no food for me there. I don't want that. That's how I took it. And she's like, no, you lied to me by saying there's no food there. It's past it. Oh, so it's food you don't like?

Liar, you're a liar it's like wow she's really she's really coming far especially when she knows what a liar fucking what's her buns from that seat what's that girl's name the uh Malia you knew what a liar she was and you you're fucking trying to make her captains on other boats sit on please don't go on this crusade against liars all of the sudden, especially not I guess someone who just didn't want to eat pasta. This is a show starring thin people. I can't believe more of them didn't revolt. Well, I think he made it sound like there was no like the food was already eaten up. But actually there was like a lot of food and when he said that he said that he didn't even see the pasta and then

we see that he was actually poking around the pasta. So either way, he's like, hey, hey, don't lie to me. Okay. When you lie to me, guess what? You lie to the boat. When you lie to the boat, you're lying to Norma. When you lie to Norma, that's actually pretty fun. Never mind.

God, I love getting the arm. Good lie. Yeah. What are you doing? And she goes, you need to apologize, Max. And he goes, no. He walks off. And she looks at Laura like, no, can you believe it? Maybe he was lying.

And he went, yes. She's getting the benefit of the doubt. I hate liars unless the lie involves actually apologizing to be in which case, I guess I'm OK with that kind of lie. Those are good lies. Those are good lies. So it ends with Maxing though he refuses to apologize like the child he is. Love you Max. And then he goes up to the boat, away from everybody else to the deck or the bow or whatever, and just starts crying. He's like, oh, which I loved.

So you know, team Max, I don't care if he lied or not, frankly, that's just the kind of weird I'm in today. He wins, he wins in my book. I'm not sure if I'm team Max or not. I don't love Max. I don't love Max. But what I am is, I will say I'm team Migran because even though I felt like Kyle was over embellishing, I appreciate anything that gets into Kyle's head and mess around with him a little bit.

So that was basically below deck med this week and now we can write if it on over to Southern hospitality the second episode of the season. It's time for commercial. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap-ins commercial. It's almost that magical time of year. Speaking of, what's your favorite Christmas story, Ben? Uh, hands down, the Grinch. Same!

It cracks me up that he hates all the marimons. Right, and he steals everyone's presents. But then it's like so heartwarming at the end when the whole town is still singing and he realizes that there's more Christmas than just gifts. Oh, I know. It hits me right in the fields. Best part is, Wondry has a new podcast starring The Grinch, and I think there's someone who wants to tell you more about it, Ronnie.

Hi, it's me, the Grand Puba of Bahamba, the OG Green Grump, The Grinch. From Wondery! Tis the Grinch Holiday Talk Show is a pathetic attempt by the people of Ruvil to use my situation as a teachable movement. So join me, the Grinch! Listen as I launch a campaign against Christmas cheer, grilling celebrity guests, like chestnuts on an open fire. Your family will love the show! As you know, I'm famously great with kids. Follow Tis the Grinch Holiday Talk Show on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, Southern hospitality, here we are!

Da da da da da da! I know a place where we can go! Oh, oh, oh, oh! I'm coming out to know! I wish we were a better. It's still no Vanderbilt rules theme, but it does stick in your head. I feel like they could have done better. Like I feel like there are multiple tricks and monical songs that are better than that one.

I don't know what happened with that one. I don't know what happened with this theme song. Everyone involved, could have done better, but if they had done better, they wouldn't be working at Republic. I don't understand. That's kind of it. They have a professional DJ on their staff. How could they have not found a better theme song? Okay, they just had to, you know, go to DJ VIP over there and get or dislike something for us, but they just didn't use the natural resource that is Maddie. Maddie's fanning right there with a lot of texts that she could just create text from her boyfriend's phone who didn't try to just find this show.

I love this show. Okay, so previously, Leva instituted a rule about not drinking after a season of bragging how all of her guest party with the people who worked for her. So, yeah, that was interesting. Lucy, it got fired. And I'm coming out tonight. Ah! We began.

Yeah, so last week we kind of felt like there was not enough Grace Lilly. It felt like she was on the sidelines. We didn't feel like we got that classic Grace Lilly stuff, but this episode opens up with her ring It's like oh, he's back kind of person. I don't even know if she is doing it for the camera She's just walking on the sidewalk talking herself, getting ready to go to work and waving at people who weren't there. She's just like, yeah morning, morning, yeah baby, woo woo, Monday baby, wavy baby, wavy baby. Okay, just man, please cross the street. You know what I mean? Like the crosswalk is now blinking at you. Could you just get out of

the head of the sidewalk sidewalk trying to cross. I know. So, uh, so she's walking in the play. She's like, ladies, how you're doing, ladies, huh? It's grace lily back, wave and driver. And, um, resolve, it's just like the club, the club is alive. It's full of joy. Like people are there. People put on their best time in Bahama and they're out to drink. I put basic dancing, that's basically what we see. A lot of basic people dancing.

Basic girls especially who are constantly having birthday parties here. And I feel like they're the same girls that we see every week, or they're just from the same basic rack of other basics, but there they are again. And someone's having a birthday. And then we cut to Maddie in bed in full makeup, eating takeout being quote unquote, depressed. And then Emily, she's sitting next to a sack. She's lying in bed and there's a stack of takeout containers at her head like in front of her face like I don't want to be depressed. Yeah, and they're also like the smallest Styrofoam containers ever, you know, they're like the smallest ones you can get

They're the ones that they put like one egg roll in when you just order like an egg roll a cart You're coming up for this Maddie, okay? And then it's like, it then goes back to the Republic and Emmy is like bossing people around and she's doing she's just like saying a bunch of words very quickly. She's like, he's going to table 10 and put table 10 and table 5 and then we go to reset and come back to table 7 and go to table 7 and go to table 5 and then we go to table 6. Table 6, go into table 3. I'm like, are you doing a cattle auction? Are you? Is there a horse race that's happening? What is happening with all these tables? That's how they talk on this show

when they are pretending to work. They just start prattling off random things about restaurants. He's like, okay, squirrel computer, okay, mirroring catch-ups, pickle, refresh, pickle, refresh on 10. Okay, hold the pickles, hold the lettuce, special orders, don't upset us.

Oh wait, go over there, all we ask. Could you tell table eight is that you lettuce haven't your way, that would be great. Water refils, water refils, do not make them ask you. Table 10, Table four, Table four to Table 10, Table 10 to Table seven, Big Mac Mattil, Dia Quarter, Benner Whissor, she's fully efficient. I have my courage, she's bigger,

I have my meal, Table three, Table four, Table four to Table five. Table six, we got a real runner. Happiness is in front having me able to table three, table four, table five, table six, we got a real runner. Happiness is in front of the lead. Number three is coming up inside layin'.

Inside layin'. It's coming up, it's coming up, it's coming up, it's coming up, it's coming up, it's coming up. It's like, okay, someone has to please just put like a cloth over emused face to make her stop.

And you know who we need to take the cloth off of? Leah CEO. Where's Leah CEO? Where's Leah CEO? Where's Leah? Don't get to just introduce a new lead character, a new main character, and then just not show me the main character the next week. What the fuck kind of racket is this?

I want my Leah CEO back. The ratings are through the roof because of Leah CEO. I know. Well, they got 37 people to watch this show last week and I want my CEO back. Well, you know what? There may have been an emergency at the Golden Corel of Las Vegas, so she had to fly back to some last minute nipping in the bud. Also, I want to say that when Emmy is saying all these random things about tables, everyone's

wearing pirate hats. They're all dressed like pirates for reasons that are never explained. It's a big pirate week. We have it on real housewives of Old Housewives of, I never will stop saying that. Real housewives of Ultimate Girls Trip, we have it on Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and here we are in Southern Charm or is that me? Maybe just, well they were in Jamaica. And the guy says, you can't touch anything underwater unless it's treasure. So maybe that's where I'm getting it.

Anyway, that one's more of a stretch, but still, it's a very pirate heavy week. It is. So it's more partying and there's like bottles and there's sparklers and then TJ says last call I Know it's the morning so That was an exciting time with the restaurant

Piotr no republic is as boom and and so then we it's Brad is Brad these working out and everything and then TJ's rubbing his face And he's just like staring at his curic like fuck this. And then we go to Joe Bradley's apartment and Joe Bradley's getting out of bed at 1 p.m. and he's washing his face and he texts the guys. He's like, Hey guys, my head's killing me. Got any evil? I think I need I think of a fever and want to bring me an evil or a girlfriend. Oh. I mean, it tells us, you know the phrase work hard, play hard. Yeah, I've never heard of it. Well, when you work at Republic,

you're working hard and you're playing hard at the same time. So when it work hard, then a play hard after I work. I was like, are you self-correcting? Because you basically just insinuated that work is play, which means you're doing coke at work still. Are we still allowed to do coke at work, by the way, because she just keeps saying drinking. So we're still allowed to do coke, right? Sorry. I'm not the only person with questions at this meeting. Hold on. I'll answer that as soon as I work this out. Work hard, play hard, play in work hard, and then work in then hard,

I then play. You're playing and you do a play while you're working and you're working in a play and it's hard, it's a hard play. I think I figured out. It's like play a squared. So then TJ comes over and he's like, oh my god, why is it so hot in here? He's like, um, I'm maybe need to put a maintenance request in because it's 75 degrees in here. Like, be hot, stay hot. You know what I mean? It's like hot squared in here. You know what? Please don't try and workshop. You're stupid. Sings with me. Okay. Time's ticking. Time's ticking. For a moment, I thought we were going to be living out an actual gay porn where you would say, I can't get the air conditioner to come on, I'm just gonna have to take off my shirt.

And things we go from there, but apparently you just do have a broken air conditioner. So here's your fucking ad, they'll let me go back to Sarah and my curic, wait, wait, wait, wait, you wanna look at my gross, look at my refrigerator? Fine. So TJ opens up his fridge and is like, oh, I'm surprised you have stuff in here. Look at that. You have You have a piece of lettuce and some tropicala. Wow a full refrigerator Thanks to my mom So then Bradley comes over and they talk about like how Bradley's not hung over because

He works out and so they all hop in bed together and hang out and then Bradley's like, so what's your hangover cure? Joey Marbles and he's like, uh, jerking off. Like, I'm a big, her the guy, uh, dog guy. So like, if I'm like hungover from all the, uh, sperm that I took the night before, then wait a minute. You know what? I'm really not. I'm gonna stop. Yeah, you should just stop.

Just stop. Sprim squared. Just stop. Sprim squared. Master patient squared. Yeah. And then they look at his curtain and has all these, these like white stains on it.

And they're like, um, do you guys like, what's going on with your curtain? He's like, oh, I don't know. And they're like, and then it goes a minute earlier, the producers go a minute earlier, hey, Joe, what's your favorite hangover cure? Probably jerking off. And then he laughs, he's like,

that could have been a misfire, guys. I mean, I don't know. And T.J. is like, yeah, maybe because he's kind of sorry, I'm even open and he goes, yeah, I haven't really had sex at all recently, which yeah, we know, because when you can shoot that far, my goodness, I mean, not to be too gross, but that is so far.

I mean, never in my life, like what kind of blood vessels do you have? Good for you. Laws, Thomas. So yeah, Joe Bradley, or Joe Marbles, is like, yeah, I haven't had any sex at all recently. And she jakes us same. And like, yeah, okay haven't had any sex at all recently. And Chico's same. And like, yeah, okay,

we're not gonna focus on your no sex. Yeah, I just haven't had, I just, maybe I like just need a girlfriend. Yeah, maybe I need a, quiet, it's my story. But I start liking a girl, but like every time I start to get a girlfriend, I end up being single.

So, huh, curtains it is, huh. He's like, I mean, I just don't understand it. Like, what is it? It's like Charleston. I mean, come on, on paper, it should be the easiest place to go to girlfriend, because like, what is it like an eight to two ratio here? Yeah, except that nobody on this, these shows no male ever seems to really keep a relationship. So I think that the ratio is probably why, you know? You use too many options, too many options. That's why you always leave Costco with like five boxes full of shit.

There's too many options. Yeah, so Brad's like this summer, we're just gonna have fun. Yeah, should we just be like single and then they like all high five and Brad's like single summer, but we don't have to be fuck boys. And Joe's like, uh, speaking of fuck boys, I looked at Ocean's Instagram.

He has them only fans. And Tito goes, yeah, I pay for it. So, it's good. It's much more entertaining than staring at my curie. Although I still do that. But yeah, he calls himself the milkman, which is funny because I was just about to call you that, Joe. But he pours milk on himself. That's kind of his thing. Joe's like, I know, I think this is when Joe fell in love with him. Joe, the eternal spurter lives like suddenly in love. He's like, the milk man, he's like, yeah.

And then we see clips of him. And it doesn't, it's not a euphemism. He literally pours milk all over himself. All he jerks off or something. It's like his thing. I mean, listen, gotta get a gimmick. It's not an easy life. Everyone has an only fan.

So like, what are you gonna do? Mine would probably be like suffocating myself with HomeGood's plastic bags, you know? Or like, Intel, the climax. Or maybe like, then I could switch it up and like suffocate myself with like, TJ Maxx bags. Yeah, I don't know. That's what he meant.

So my friends, I have a friend who has an oldie fans and he does. I haven't seen his only fans, but at least on his Instagram, he would pour milk on himself. He would do the thing where it's like, you're sort of drinking, but you're kind of just pouring it on your chest and I was like, huh, that's an interesting use for milk. Well, I guess there's people love it.

People love it. There's like a thing on the trip. So yeah, I don't know why, but they really enjoy that. Yeah, people really love random things. One of my mom's friends was telling me, oh my God, you know what I love? I watch this lady on YouTube and she cleans.

That's like her thing. She watches it for hours and hours and they never show the lady's face. They just show her cleaning. And she looks like maybe she would be a very beautiful woman but they don't know because it really just, she doesn't tell you how to clean, she just cleans. Wow.

It's like watching blood. Yeah. Does my mom's friend jerk off to that? I don't know. I don't know how we went to only fans to that. It's relating to- It's relating to- It's relating to-

It's relating to- Is the lady, does she work in Charleston by any chance? Perhaps in Oshin's apartment? She's like, oh God, another moxtain. And so, Brad, please. Let me guess. She has a lot of videos of steaming curtains. Yeah.

So, yeah. So basically, Oshin has a only fans a, uh, only fans and Joe's like, how much does the milk like, is that the platinum package? Like, what type does he like? Is, what, what, can I, does he okay with like, non-deric cream or like, what should I get for him? And TJ is like, um, I don't think that's part of the package. And also, I don't know who's holding the camera, but it's clearly not one of his hands. Because they're both occupied.

Much like I wish my hands were occupied with a coffee cup, as soon as this curic would finish its job. Hm. And he's like, oh my God, see our curtains look like Jo's. Ha ha. And he's like, shut the fuck up man. So then, um, Grace is drive, Grace Lili is driving

and just talking to herself. She said, Grace is drive gracefully is driving and just talking to herself said oh yeah, it's a bye-bye me here Swarving off the road girl keep her hands on the then she starts giving herself the monologue so that you are goddess You are a queen you're a queen, you're powerful, love you girl, love you girl. I know. As you're saying this into her rear view mirror while she drives. And again, like you're seeing like explosions off the side of the rail, this people are crashing. And then her phone ring. I've never seen somebody hula hooping while they're driving before I'm on her. She is. So now at the phone rings and it's Maddie.

So now she's talking with her phone while she's driving. She has it on speaker, but she basically has the phone up like, you know, up to her cheek. And she's like, Hello, queen. How are you doing? And I was like, hi, how are you?

Oh, everything's going good. I drop Fergioff at the vet. She's getting spayed. I still want to get some action, but I don't want to get pregnant. You know, just like me, I got my IUD in so I can have a little sex and not get pregnant. You know what I'm saying? I'm like, wow, you just front load a conversation with a lot of information really quickly. Yeah, yeah, I got a space.

She don't get pregnant like me The ladies nuts so They're talking about how grace has a boyfriend now and she's like yeah, when I want something I'm manifested Like if you want something just speak into existence and now I have a boyfriend. Mmm, yeah, I got it. Mmm. Liam and I met at Bourbon and Bubbles when the moon and the stars aligned and we've been dating for eight months and he's just like everything

you want and more. Yeah, I don't know what he does for a job. He doesn't really have much personality, he doesn't really talk much, but he's alive. And I like that. Malthusim, I don't want to overly criticize your manifestation. I think manifestation can be a great tool. Might I suggest you're doing it wrong? You are a bottle girl at Republic,

and you live with your mom. So concentrate. Manifest harder, you know what I mean? Manifest a hands free device for your phone while you're driving. How about that? So, um, so Grace, like how's Trevor and Matt is like, oh, I can't do the drama with him. I'm staying in Daniel Island right now. I'm like, I can't, like I can't. I don't know what, five egg roll boxes in front of me. And saying there's nuts, this is absolutely nuts. They say that Daniel Island has the most egg roll boxes

to human ratio in the entire nation. It is not so over here on this island. So she tells her that Trevor was, the Brad told her that Trevor was texting some girl, making out with some girl, and they were texting, making out, there's not enough egg rolls in the world

to like help me get over it. And Grace, like, oh, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, is he telling the truth now? It's probably telling the truth. She goes, I don't know. She goes, you know what? He's had to get you. He really does.

What? Right here, he's saying two different things at one time. He's out to get you. He really does. Oh, I was answering. I was having two pep talks at the same time. I'm on the phone with my mom. So then, now Maddie's at her friend's house. We see her at her friends house, I should say. And she's looking for stuff in the bathroom cabinet. So she also gives herself a pep talk. She's like,

okay, you got this, Maddie. You can do it. You can brush your teeth. And then she tells us that the last couple of days it been really hard. And we see a flashback to her in Trevor fighting with the cameras like outside the house and they're they're fighting inside a house about him, maybe making out with a potential robot lady the other night, every public. So then Grace is telling us, I thought trouble real cares for Maddie. Did I just fart? Oh my God, I'm so sorry y'all, just farted.

Oh my God, I'm so embarrassed. But honestly, like get the full story from him, okay? Cause listen, I spent a lot of time with Maddie and Trevor. We all went to Tulum together. Oh my God, do you guys do anything else? Where is Tulum in relationship to this place? Is it like a block away? You're always in Tulum.

Oh, everything happens in Tulum. So now Maddie shows up at the house. And she has to, she's in a Mercedes, I'm sorry, not Maddie. Grace shows up at the house. And she's in a Mercedes, I'm sorry, not Maddie, Grace shows up at the house. And she's in a Mercedes, but this is so this show, she shows up in a Mercedes and she goes, doors break in and she has to roll down her window and open her door from the outside

to get out of her Mercedes. And this is the special matter festing again. Hard at work. The visual metaphor here is like showing up on a Mercedes that is so janky that you have to reach your hand to the outside to get out of it. She's acting drowning. So now they're talking about well first of all this is an odd place Charleston I mean, I know this is like Daniel Island or whatever but still so there's like on the front

Stoop or whatever of this home. There's one of those little frogs from home goods that's holding a tray It's a better there are little fake desserts on top of the tray and they look like Those ain't real, huh? It almost looked like fake brachetta. It was just bizarre. Yeah, whatever it was, it was like, why would you make statue versions of something gelatinous? It looked like gelatinous.

Because your first thought is, is it real? And even if it could be, you're like, what pigs to leave this food outside? You know, I know. See that outside? You're supposed to put a plant on that thing, not actual trick food. But trick, I know the fact that there even is trick food,

especially trick food in that shape that's like potentially dessert, potentially a prosciutto. And the thing is that the fact that for a moment, we all thought like, it might actually be food, because I can imagine someone's like, well, that's just how we do it in Charleston. Oh, it's the food out for a stranger. You know, yeah. So Grace is talking, she's telling her, listen, don't trust Bradley. She's like, you need to take him where grain of salt, because you need to get the full store from Trevor or maybe call him on speaker phone, because you're overhearing him, like you can overhear it,

and then maybe you can hear what she has to say to you, which I think is great advice, which I was surprised that she gave her good advice. Yeah, because she's gracefully. I mean, she's like, basically. She's like, she showed up here, like how does she drive? She's like, trick that slut. Just have Trevor call her on speaker phone, but don't tell her that you're there.

And I'll, uh, you know, um, Luanne calling Bethany when Jill Zaren was present or whenever that situation was back in the old days. Do you want to do one of those things? And you'll find out what really happened. And, uh, Matt is like, I don't know, I'm not sure I'm ready to see Trevor. I mean, I'm obviously dealt with this before with him. And you know, like I pictured my dreams coming true with him. I mean, who else hasn't dreamt of a petty cab driver just literally whisking them away into the sunset? I thought I had it all all.

I don't even know if he's my person now. Well, if he's not my person, what if my person drives? What if my person drives a car that changes everything? So then we go to Will's parents house where he is still out of commission because of his wrist and or his arm or whatever. And he's like, babe, I got a surprise for you, laxatives, because you haven't taken a shit. And he's like, babe, these are suppositories.

And he goes, what does that mean? He goes, it goes up your butt. I'm serious, you can take pills both ways. And you would have to stick that up my butt. She was like, oh gross, never mind. Keep your shit inside yourself. I'm not sticking my finger up there. So basically they talk about law school.

Is he going to go? And he's like, yeah, I'm excited. Because last year I was really conflicted. I wanted to go to law school. And then we see Leva, who's, you know, every parent's dream, being like, you shouldn't get a law school, you should have a bar. I can just so talented it, like barring, you know, like the way you make a schedule. I mean, it is like, if there was a Pulitzer, you definitely have it. Are you sure you want to go to college? Because I can

offer you about $12 an hour at a bar. And then Will says, but I think my parents didn't want me to open a bar and Emmy wants to be a law school trophy wife. So I'm going to go to law school. It's a win-win. It's like, well, it sounds like a great reason to go down this path for the rest of your life. I'm sure it'll work out well. There will be no resentments later on in life.

I know, right? The point of every truly astounding autobiography is like, well, my parents wanted me to. My girlfriend wanted a bigger ring, so that's why I did it. It's like, whoa. Did it in a statue? Yeah. Sounds like you'll make a great lawyer.

Sounds like your heart's really in it. So, Emmy is, they start talking about Maddie and Trevor. And Emmy's like, so we found out that Trevor cheated on Maddie again and Maddie left early from work. I mean, you're a manager, you're a manager. And we'll say, yeah, she's like totally checked out of the high pressure job that is being a VIP host is set republic.

She's like, yeah, like a she chooses going out and working on a petty cab shift with Trevor instead of working her own shift. And then we see a clip of last week, Matty in a black leotard and boots with diamond fringe coming out of the leotard, sneaking out to be with Trevor. Just the image. I feel like we all need a picture of ourselves and our youth like that. It's like blue lighting and she's just like sneaking away in a in a rhinestone leotard.

I know. To like sneak a few stolen moments with a petty cab driver. So Will is like, he's like, you know, it's annoying me because I see you bustling your ass at Republic and you're making everyone else more money and then you're splitting it with people that don't even have the same dedication to that.

I say, case closed. Sorry, I'm just getting ready for law school. I mean, you know, she doesn't even pull her weight. I mean, yeah, she doesn't pull her weight, which is I have to say Trevor pulls his weight. I mean, he does drive a petty car. Maybe that wasn't the right have to say Trevor pulls his weight. I mean, he does drop a pedicam. Maybe that wasn't the right thing to say. Yeah. So he's like, well, you're better than her, so whatever.

So then we go to Lucia and Mia meeting up for lunch and they're like wooing and like, oh my God, look at us. May the one of us has a job. Yes. Hey, jobless sister. Jobless friend. Love you. Oh my god.

We're not crying on the inside. I'm not putting so ever. Totally not crying. They're immediately like, wait a minute. Yeah. Why are we so happy? Let's see, I was like, I missed Republic. I want to be back, but like I didn't even get the opportunity

to talk to Leva because of you. You decided to have a scene and he was like, yeah, I put him in a very bad mood. So I think I made things a lot worse. Oh well, I still have a job in finance. Woo! Mm-hmm. And Lucy is like, listen, I know she's trying to have my back,

but now I don't know. Just like Leva, I think I sent her after her, like that totally ruined any chance of me attempting to get my job back. So she gets a message, which, you know, she's like, thing, oh my God, what a coincidence. I got a message from Leva. And now it says, now that I've had time to calm down, I'm here to meet with you sometime

next week. And I put in yes, I just put yes because thank you, yes, because I'm nervous. Fucking Leva, okay, spoiler alert for anybody who hasn't watched this episode. You won't talk to her when you know she's in the bar. You stay hiding in the back. And then she texts you over and over to get together. And you say, now that I've calmed down, I can talk to you next week. How long are you going to take to tell this woman she's still fired? Such an asshole. Who does that? That's, that is funny. I didn't think about it that way. So, it's not nice. Lucia is saying how, you know, she's more than just an employee.

Okay, because she went to Leva's kids birthday party. Like, and she brought her kid to that birthday party. So, they've experienced children's birthday parties together. So, she's more than an employee. She's a family member. She's a basic lover's daughter. So yeah. Yeah. So they're optimistic.

That's going to go well for Lucía. The brand. Lucía, you should check your phone to see if you got a tax. Meredith Marx is like, oh, really? I thought I was the only one that used that sadistic evil twisted move on people. Oh, I guess that little sea has been setting up fake Instagram accounts also based on the land, Jake of the people in the table. So so she's like, no, I didn't get a text, but I guess it's a step in the right direction. And they both laugh uproariously and uncomfortably because they're both facts.

Basically, at this point. So now Joey Marbles and O'Shean go to a restaurant. By the way, last week, I think we said his name in many different ways, but now we know it's O'Shean. And it's gonna be Boys Night. Boys Night with Joey Marbles and O'Shean, and they're gonna celebrate Will getting into law school, which also I'm very intrigued to know what law school

was going to, and I just want to know. So they are like Brad, Brad joins them and then Will and TJ and everything and Brad's were in green. So she was like, Oh, look at that. Here's like Robin Hood out here. Look at that lad. Look at that lad. Little Robin Hood here, you got to steal from the ...steal from the rich and give to the TJ. Am I right? Ho ho! So, they're all just like bean bros, having good times. So, he's like, well, look at you, well, because we'll come see, he's like, look at you, really fucked in a sling, right? But you'll be back to joking off in the shower, no time, and my right brother. They're like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh my god. He got a sling reference and a jerk off reference in one thing.

This is oh, she, wow, he's a sexy guy in my ride. And Will's like, listen, I still have a hand, right? So I could do it. And then they're like, to just get, by the way, how do you have sex with a sling? How does that work? And most like, well, we just reverse cow girl. I just lie here and she does all the work

and I say, sustained. Sorry, lawyer talk. I've been my new thing. Then we see Oceane getting... Oh my God, unless you're like the curtains that Joey Marbles has in which case it's just stained. Am I right guys? It is us and it is stained So she is like he's like, oh well I did picture me with someone a little bit more masculine

You know like somebody with more hoivos. That's a word I learned into loom Story back story. That is oh I've a very, very dark story about to look at that later. So he's like, wow, look at this glass. Fellas, it's a Dorothy glass. Am I right? Okay, you're seeing, okay. You're very sexy, seeing, okay, we all get it. He's like, can't even feel my hand around us.

Ah, what the God has we say back home. Slard laugh, lard laugh, lard laugh, lardörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö, Flörlö I'm an Englishman and I don't cheer Irishman. And they're like, ha ha ha ha ha. No she's like, you would be kicked to the curb my boy. Looks like you perhaps you already have been slingy mixed slinger son. So then, then of course Joey's like, I had no idea there was an amostody between the English and the Irish. Maybe I should have finished college. Maybe? Okay, I don't think a college at

should occasion's gonna fix that. I mean, I know, but I mean, do you have Netflix? Do you have anything? Are you in the world? I just, have you, I've seen a map. Have you heard about Ireland? Have you heard about England? Have you seen a Daniel David Lewis movie?

Come on, you can do this. So Will is, they're all basically kissing O'Sheans ass, right? And he's talking, everything they say, he makes some comment like, oh, you wanna share a leg of lamb? He's like, oh, we share no legs here. You get our own between your legs here.

It's like, oh, okay. So they're like, wow, this guy's like a total stud, am I right? And Will's like, yeah, it's like when a new girl comes to town and suddenly your friend just doesn't want to talk to you anymore. And I thought at first, like, okay, that's a little dramatic. I got them, it gets to Joey Marbles, like, all googly eyes, his eyes are huge. And he's just like, he is having a sexual awakening

with his shoes. He's so cool. He's so cool. He is gazing at Oshin. Like something is opening up on the inside for Joey Marbles and I'm very excited for him. So then Will's asking Oshin where he lives and he's like, oh, I moved out here a couple of weeks ago.

I was in Mexico, dark backstory. A little bit before that, but I got out of a serious relationship about three and a half years ago and I ran off at the beginning of COVID in Mexico and I guess I ran off from everything. I lost my job. I was playing professional rugby. I was actually lactose intolerant at that time and that all stopped.

What is it about to loom that caused half the people of this cast to go running to it during the pandemic? Why, why to loom of all places? I guess it's close to where they are. I mean, talk about needing to finish college and can't ever even start it. But I'm guessing is it just like an easy plane ride? I mean, is it like our Cabo? I don't know.

I don't know. You know, Cabo is like really close. Hold on. Let me look. Charleston to to loom. Let's see. It's 10 hours, so. I don't think it's actually not close at all. Actually, so.

It's just, it's so funny that on this show, it feels like so many of them have a backstory about having traveled to Tulum during the pandemic and they bond and they met people and they got into relationships. Like everything happened in Tulum. Yeah, well now I'm obsessed with deals. So let me see. So I changed the date. So let's see, should we, let's look on cheapo air. Now let's look at bestticketfare.com. You know, it does, by the way, I just, okay.

I wanna say, I of course have my Google maps up and I'm looking at like the relative difference between LA and Cabo San Lucas and the relative difference between Charleston and Tulum is not massively different. Visually, I should say. Yeah, it's about five hours. It's like a five hour flight.

If you get it. That's longer. LA to San Lucas is what, like, two and a half hours? Three? Yeah. I don't know. I don't know why I got this on this. Okay.

So, for whatever reason, they're always in know why I got us on this. Okay, so for whatever reason they're always until they love till is okay everything that happens in to him on the show So he goes to Tulum because he was no really dark place you guys and then he went to the middle of to the room Where nobody was and started sex parties. Who's a really really dark rugby this time in this man's life Yeah, and it's so parties. Who's a really, really dark rugby this time in this man's life. And so Joe's like, okay, you're amazing, but we're really not here to congratulate you. Even though congratulations, fucking love you, you're fucking amazing. I can have your number right. Okay. But we're here to celebrate well though. You're amazing. Hey, I want to see how you, I don't know. Well, I'm

going to look at you for a minute during this cheers. I want to watch you celebrate. Well, do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. Would you be open to donating some of your hair for me to put on to my draper's? Just, just, just wondering. So she's like, oh, brats lad, congrats lad on getting into non-rugby law school. And TJ goes, I'm going to miss you. It's like a whole new environment. Sort of like my life in season two without a vacuum cleaner. It's just a different world.

Feels weird. It feels like, well, it's like going to be completely new because, like, first of all, like, right now, I'm not in law school. And I'm going to be in law school. That's going to be different. Second of all, like, law isn't here and right now I'm here. So that's also going to be different. And then like right now I'm with you guys, but then in law school I'm not going to be with you guys. So that's going to be different too. And also, all right man, Jesus Christ I've jerked off and come five times and just start to talk and please be quiet, beta. Yeah, Joe Brad and Tj and I work together in a non-law environment.

And we also play hard together. I think, have you ever heard that expression work hard play hard? Yeah. So apparently there's a new version of it that's like called work hard then play hard then play then work hard then work hard play hard and then you say play play square at the end. Yeah. So that's what I'm dealing with.

And it's weird because I'm not sure I'm going to be able to be as close to these guys anymore. It's like I'm worried that I'm going to lose my friends who just sit around and drink all day and scrape pie being VIP servers and I'm going to have a new set of friends who are all lawyers and successful and smart and I'm not comfortable with that. successful and smart and I'm not comfortable with that. Yeah, um, this is going to be interesting. So, um, they decided to play fuck Mary Kill and then TJ's like, um, I think we should play, we should add one and play fuck Mary Kill oral, uh, oral two, right? And, uh, oh, she's like, I'll take a oral from anyone, brawl that doesn't matter

when the lights are down. I mean, I, I win. I'm sorry. We don't keep scoring this game. When Oshin says I'll take a war from pretty much everyone, it cuts immediately to Joe, going, and then he goes, just turn the lights off motherfucker and it cuts back to him again, going, I was like, Joe's gonna have quite a season. It's like the Homer Simpson doughnuts.

I know. So now people are clacking in, and Joe and Emmy are standing in our favorite set piece of Vanderpump rules, which they've finally learned about, because I don't think I remember any scenes in front of this amazing set piece, the Ice Machine.

Guys, give it up for the set designers. Have we seen a lot of Ice Machine scenes? Because this is gonna make the show. Yeah, it's a huge thing. So Joey's like, you know, it's a little weird like a week ago, like Maddie pulled up to Trevor's house with a shovel, and it's like, none of that even happened,

because they're cutting to Maddie, like moving glasses around on a table, like look at her moving on with life. She put some ketchup on a table, and then ranged to napkin. Wow, it's like she never got a cheat. Oh my God, I can't believe she would leave during her shift.

Did we see anything bad because she left nothing? We've seen nothing bad happen. You guys are really trying hard though. And then he's like, oh my God, I can't even think about it right now. I will not even think about it. She's like a suppository. Did I use that correctly in a sentence?

It's. She's like table seven, trying to go after table 10, but when the drinks have to go to table eight, okay? Thoughtless. So now I've got a lot of drinks going the drinks have to go to table 8, okay, thoughtless. So now I've a lot of drinks going around and Bradley's talking to guests and Emmy's pouring champagne and Maddie is talking to a guy saying, hey, happy Sunday and Maddie's

telling us, Republic is the only place where I don't feel like I have to think about all the shit that's going on in my life. Like you can sit in bed and cry about it all day, or you can go out and get busy. And I'm gonna go out and get busy right now. I'm like, wow, you're an American hero. So she's standing in front of the club with, or whatever you call it, the hallway of a restaurant

with Grace Lillie. And she's like, finally, I can get away with talking about my personal life She goes so what's going on with trade with Trevor She goes talk about it. Did you manifest anything because right now I'm manifesting Trevor When I win I Hope it's not Trevor, but it is someone else driving a Dratly on a bike so

Yeah, it was, you know what, it just turned out it was a spare wheel that went rolling down the sidewalk. So Madison's like, well, listen, I don't feel like I need to figure out anything right now, which is good, because I don't think she has ever figured anything out so far in the two, in the one and a half seasons we've seen.

So then the, then the manager, some random manager comes out and it's like, hey, get back to work. I don't even know who that person was. She's like, sorry. So then why no, who wasn't? Leah CEO. So whatever Chris, you fucking loser, get out of here.

Get Leah out of the ice machine and back on stage, which she needs to be. So next she gets a test for the end of the prep. She just ign is it. What'd you say? I'm not I'm just moving on so she gets a text from Trevor and Matty's like she's she brings up some big beefy Southern guy and she's like hey do you think this would be a good bottle boy because like I'm working and then he's like, Hey, should I be working here? I mean, he's hot. So it's really all we require, right? Okay.

All right, get a social security member. Let's do this. For as like, sure, whatever. And so he just walks away and she's like, he fucking hates me. So he Brad's just saying that he's just keeping his distance from her because they don't have to be buddy, buddy, they don't have to even be friends.

So then, and oh, big cameo time, they're really, they're rolling out the red carpet on this show, okay, we have a big star. It's Rod from Southern Charm. Oh, Rod. So bad. It's so embarrassing, they try it every week and it's just like, oh, I don't

know. Do you have a Cameron? Um, yeah, I don't know. Catherine, maybe well, steps probably not allowed in there. Yeah. Yeah. Catherine, see Cameron, Catherine come out and he's something, but it's Rod, you know, so take what you can get. And no offense, Rod. But thanks. So he comes and Liam and TJ and Grace are talking and Grace lilies like Trevor text or everybody. He's like, well, I wonder if he's gonna try and come in today or just come in general, which Joe Bradley really can do far, you guys. Bar. He bar. Yeah. And Grace is like, well, we love Trevor. And she's with her boyfriend Liam. He's like, yeah, I like Trevor.

She goes, I know he made mistakes last year, but he's done better. I'll let him figure it out. What they need to figure it out. And if they get into fights, they can just fuck it out. Come on, y'all. And then Trevor texts, I miss you. X-L-X-O-X-U. So now we get Leva and Lucia. Don't, don't, don't.

So Leva is meeting Lucia for lunch. And I have a feeling she's not gonna pay for the C there. Okay? We could have just done this over the phone, but whatever. So she's, Leva is like visibly really not comfortable. Like, um, hi. Uh, well, sorry, it took me a while, but you know, I had to get my bearings because it was so hurtful to me. But I am here now to tell you you're still fired and I'm not getting this.

This stream of income back for your family. So can we have about nine entrees that would be great. Thank you. Jesus shall be paying. Okay. You accept capital one here. Okay. Great.

I have a question. Now, do you have any, I know you have some lovely salads here, but I was looking for something in the grill. Do you have anything that can be like fired up back there? Just I love it. Just a little fired back there. Okay, thanks so much. Just wanted to make sure.

Do you have anything on the menu that's 86 besides Lucia that I should know about? Okay, great. You believe now. By the way, also congratulations on building back. I heard you guys had a horrific fire here. That's terrible. So I'm glad it's I'm glad you're back. Yeah. So Lucy is like, well, you know, I was just like waiting to hear like what your vibe is. And she's like, well, I did hear a whole earful from me. So that was traumatizing. I have a lot of video cameras to watch. So not really sure what you expect from me, but go ahead. Because no, no, I know, you know, me

was trying to have my back, and that wasn't the way to go about it. But, you know, I just like to ask for some grace, because like it's been seven years, you know, and I haven't ever even been written up. And I don't want it to seem like I'm like, you know, like getting drunk at work. I mean, it was a swig, but it was not like I was wasted or something like that. Yeah, but you know what though? The difference is is that when you break a rule that creates like a safety issue

and those are such hard lines like, we have not installed airbags in this bar. And so we just have to be really careful and just not acceptable to have any alcohol period in an environment Where we serve alcohol and if I keep you I don't get I don't and I don't keep other people that I fired for months ago Then there's like certain things that are just like I can't do that and there's just like certain things that are like black and white And there's just nothing I can do unfortunately I have absolutely no power in this situation

All I do is run this organization and decide who gets hired and who gets fired. I have no power. Nothing I can do. She looks scared and she looks nervous. Lev it as to me. I'm like, do really even work here because the rumor is that she doesn't. She just puts on a costume or puts on whatever and comes to work for the cameras. She doesn't seem like she's done this a lot.

She's like, and there are rules. And you, that's it. That door is closed. And so Lucius starts crying. And she's like, I mean, look, the decision is made. It's not like something you can reopen, Lucius. I mean, like, I don't know what you want me to do. She's like, wait, you don't know what I want you to do.

Love it. I'm just trying to get my job back, babe. Yeah. And she's like, yeah, I don't know what I want you to do. Love it. I'm just trying to get my job back, man. Yeah, and she's like, yeah, I don't know. I mean, it's love it because I mean, what do you want me to do right now? Rehire her. Don't ask her a total question that you can literally answer. And she's like, I mean, how many,

she's like, how many texts do I say? Like, guys, mind your peas and cues. I mean, you don't understand. Leah has booby-trop my house. If we do not mind our peas and queues, my house will literally explode. We are very stressed out at our household. I love that.

She's like, I would let you back, but I'm terrified of Leah. So there's a bomb under my car. And if I go less than 50 miles per hour and you don't mind your peas and queues, I'm gonna explode. Yeah. So she's like, I'm just shocked.

So she's crying. And she's like, I'm shocked. I mean, seven years of loyalty, hustling and grinding until three in the morning. I'll just throw it away like that. I mean, to be fair, no, you did make the money from hustling and grinding until three in the morning because that's what a job is. And beyond that, it away like that. I mean, to be fair, no, you did make the money from hustling and grinding till three in the morning because that's what a job is.

And beyond that, it is like restaurant work. Unfortunately, it's just sucks. You don't have any stake in these places, which is why it sucks when you give your youth to them. I'm sorry, projecting, projecting, darling. But what do you think of this? Because I didn't like when Lava said in her Instagram post, like, I'm sorry guys, but I like was trying to give

an Afro-Latina, you know, a platform. So sorry, I just thought that was gross. I thought her whole Instagram was post, her post was gross. But I mean, if she did tell them a zillion times, and it had been months since this rule was, you know, and she got caught on the job. I mean, yeah, you're fired.

And my question is, how was nobody else caught because you know everybody else is drinking too. So I'm curious. I mean, I think if it was like, personally, I think I would have just pulled the CSI and been like, and like sort of like quietly said, honestly, you would be fired. Like we have zero power. I'm giving you, I'm giving you some grace right now. This is a warning.

And don't tell anyone this because otherwise, because everyone else I would fire. But you, I'm, cause I like you. I've known you for seven years. You've been to my house. You've been around my children. You would be fired. I'm giving you this one chance. Like that's, I've known you for seven years, you've been to my house, you've been around my children, you would be fired, I'm giving you this one chance. Like that's I think what I would do,

but like the, the, this very intense, like, oh, you know, one strike in your out, that is intense, but that being said, the rule is the rule. So, well, I was kind of thinking at first, like this is a new rule, the whole season last season, everybody drank like this isn't a big deal, but the fact that she found her in the or that whoever found her in the freezer meant that she was hiding to drink. It changes it a little for me because I'm like, okay, well, if you were hiding in the free, if you were hiding in the walk-in, then you knew that you, you know,

so I don't know. I don't think I'd realize the freezer part. Yeah, I think she said, didn't they say that in the scene like they, she was in the freezer or something? Oh, let me go look back. I mean, does it really matter? I think I just said that, but maybe I was making it up. I like to know the full vision of it.

Go on. Oh, maybe she didn't say the freezer. She says, I was not drunk at all. There was a little swig, but I would like to clear that up. Maybe that isn't my head. Who knows? You know what? My memory, I'm not a reliable witness.

We all know that. Well, there was just a story in the news about someone who died in a walk in freezer. So maybe that's what you really? Yeah, I mean, it happened a few years ago, and so the family just won like a $10 million settlement like a day ago. So maybe somehow that creeped into your consciousness? I don't know. I haven't heard that.

I don't think, but there it is. I just imagined her in the freezer and I was like, God, but that was apparently in my head. So I don't know. I haven't heard that, I don't think, but there it is. I just imagined her in the freezer and I was like, Goddard! But that was apparently in my head. So I know. I don't know what to say you guys. It was very out, like as soon as you said that, I was like, she could have died. I just read that. Well, the walkins have a lever which you can supposedly open from the outside. I mean, maybe somebody locked it. I don't know. I don't know. Well, this person was, this person was not in a, I think a sober state. And they were at like the, at a hotel and they meandered down into the kitchen, like late at night, and they were drunk and they got into the freezer and they just died in there. I don't know what the story was, but, well, I don't know how it happened happened but it's a real dark story. Yeah um so let's see

so love it's like I mean it breaks my heart to see you up so she's like it breaks my heart to see you upset but like I have to put the business first. I hope something better lands in your laps like me too. Me too she goes okay we're gonna pack everything up waiter. Okay, because I'm gonna go home. So Bye. Um, oh, by the way, could you do something for me? Anything. Pick up the check. Bye Hi, hearing out. Let's pack a food. Good luck with the rest of your non-reality TV non-bar career. Bye So she leaves and then the song that they play next is So she leaves and then the song that they play next is Free as a bird my song will be heard. I love to channel the other nut level and

It sounded almost like the song was praising the sea like you got out take it take the win take the win You got out of Republic Yeah, okay When, take the win, you got out of Republic. Yeah. Okay, so now we're back at the house in Daniel Island and we find out that Matty and O'Shean are like besties and he's shaving and he's like, you didn't lack the bear, did you? Cause I'm gonna get rid of that. And it's like, no, like you're just gonna keep the peto stash grows bro.

No, and he's like, the most stash has been my savior over the years. It's protected me from like every toxic person. Now, we know from a show that you've been on before, Vanderprember rules, that the mustache is actually the sign of a toxic person. So can't wait to come out of the closet with that one. Yeah, toxic fuck. You're also living under the same roof as Maddie.

So Maddie is like, do I need to grow a mustache? Ha ha ha ha. You know what? Living with y'all, it's been so nice. It's like we're in college again playing Jenga with take out boxes. Ah, the best. So she says, since Trevor and I have started to fight, I've been staying on Daniel Island with Oshina, my friends.

And Oshina is such a great roommate. Like he cooks us three meals a day. He's like a girls girl for sure. Not sure why he always pours milk on himself in the middle of the kitchen, but like, you know, everyone has their own thing. We keep finding pubic hair in the milk, but you know what, otherwise,

he's a really, really good guy. And so we see him getting on the bed and be like, what's the goal scarl? And they're talking about her relationship with Trevor. going to the guy. And so we see him getting on the bed and be like, what's the goal scurril? And they're talking about her relationship with Trevor. And, you know, she's just exhausted because they always break up and they make up and she's just exhausted with the whole cycle. And he tells us that until he was always free as a butterfly, but here her mind is warped. And he's like, are you really happy with this cycle,

with this douchebag? And she's like, you know what? Love isn't just black or white. I was like, wow, are they just saying that a lot right now in Charleston? Because that's what Leva just said, two minutes ago. She's like, you know what? It's not black or white.

Mad is like, I gotta mine my pees and gews. So, so then she's like showing her dress that she's gonna wear tonight to Oshin, and she's like, what do you think about this? And he's like, oh, that's really naughty baby. And Trevor texts yet again. So she's like, what's going on, girl? Oh, she goes, well, I'm being love bombed right now.

And so he does no idea what love bombing is. So she's like, no love bombing. You know, it's like a love bomb is when you shower someone with love and attention and free rides on a petabyte. I mean, a petty bike, maybe a petabyte, but probably a petty bike. Letters are important. I literally mind your pees and queues.

So that's 20 minutes. that's $20 a minute. What are you talking about? And RD, that's what we call that. Love bombing, give it over to me, Garob, saving up for Christmas. She's like, no, it's a term. So she's like, yeah, it's been about a week since I confronted Trevor with a shovel.

But he's been blowing up my phone. We're gonna take care of this. So she's like, really need to figure this out. So then we go to Republic and they're doing a lot of like, oh my God, guys, we need to sell some tables. You know what you guys should do tonight? Sell some bottles. Yeah, they're doing their whole thing

and like Republic has the most important club in the world and we need to sell some bottles. So San Joey goes up to O'Shoen and he's like, Hey, how's it going? Are you feeling what I'm feeling right now? Do you feel like this? Do you feel this right now? Just like chemistry and brands like, you all about to kiss. Ha ha ha.

You know, Joey's like, shut up. I mean, we could. If you want. And there's someone new here named Sally. And she's like a new VIP host as Ansa Jo, he's like, I'll show you some table numbers. Mia Usela.seth, because she got fired. It's black and white.

So I'm not asking anything about that. All right. Sally is like a young Sharon stone. I really, I enjoy her just because she looks like Sharon stone. So then Mia's at home eating alone, and she's trying to text everyone like, Hey, who wants to hang out up your done with your shifts? But like, no one's hiding out with her because she's been banned from Republic. So, Joey tells us, before Sally started working at Republic, I'd like to see around town.

And I'm like, who's this? And then like, but now I'm like her boss. So probably she should tread lightly. It's kinda dangerous having the hot new girl in town right next to you at the club. Right? Totally into her. Totally into her.

Who's that ocean? Or it comes first, all right? Sally, she's, I'm really, when does the pleasure come out? Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Okay, Sally. So then Oceane is out there laughing and guys. The paps are here because it's another huge star. Huge star

calling. Zvenida from Southern John. Yeah, that guy that she's dating his name we can't even remember. They're here. It's Venita and her dog and a sweater on the red carpet. VIP coming in hot. It's Venita. So Venita, I feel like this was Venita's biggest scene that she's had all year between the show and Southern charm.

So she comes in and then does Lava even go up to Venita? Does Lava even come with Venita? Does she? Okay. Yeah, she comes up and says hi to them. And then they bring out a queen of King Street sign for Lava. And they're like, oh my God, Lava, happy. I'm used to her anniversary. I don't even know what it is.

But they're like, oh my God, you guys love us at her own restaurant on TV. This is crazy. Make the sign. They really get a lot of use out of that. So I love that sign. I just say, wow, they really do. That's a big deal for them last year. Last week was superstar. This week was that what you just said. So they're really, they're really going nuts. So love goes up to Emmy and she's like, she's like, so how's it going? And I'm like, oh my God, it was a great night. I still like, moved to like one table

and dumped another table and then like a vintage shan donned on to like a yet another table. And then I actually took all those people from that table and sold them to another table. Yeah, it's like a weird king that they all have but I sold a table to a table. And oh my God, it's like honestly, the best night we've ever had here at this club.

You know what, one thing I love that you didn't say right now, like you were talking about hustling, you didn't say that you would love an education. I'm so proud of you. I'm so proud of you. Quick quiz. Ireland and England, what's a relationship like? I think they're like friends. Thank god. Yes, you'll be here forever. They're both English. I think they're like friends. Oh, thank God. Yes, you'll be here forever.

They're both English. Perfect. Put it on the spine. Colonies of Russia. Great. Great. You're stuck. So the next day, Maddie is going to a place called Sharehouse,

which I just think is the funniest name of a restaurant when you're accusing your boyfriend of making out with randos. I don't know. Is there a nowhere called like dependable monogamy that you can get some, you know, dolmas from? Come on. Yeah. He gets them dolmas.

So then Maddie, she shows up with her outfit. I'm getting hungry. It's late in our day. So Maddie shows up in an Audi, which I think is also kind of funny. Like I just think it's funny that they're driving luxury cars, but they're basically just like fancy like waiters and waitresses. And so she goes up to Trevor and he's like, can I get a hug? And she's like, no, because well, I got you flowers. Here are some flowers. How are you doing? Oh my God, you got some Harris teeter flowers.

Oh my God, let's get married. So she's just giving him a dirty luck and he's saying, and he's doing this thing where he's just smiling from ear to ear like a little boy. He's like, huh, so how are you? He's like, how am I? I'm horrible, Trevor.

How do you think I am? I'm horrible. I Get that let's talk about it. I thought you were my person Okay, I'm a person now, but I am Fuck off my person would never would Be this predicament in the first place. I'm literally shaking. I'm shaking more than a passenger on your little petty cab.

Okay, if you cheated on me or not, that will come out. This is a small town with very bumpy streets, as you know, and we find out everything. But I told you about it the next day. And she's like, the next day, Trevor pulled out the text messages and showed me that he got drunk and appropriate and appropriate. And I believed him. And the bomb that dropped I didn't know about was that there was a kiss. And that's crossing a line that I would never be okay with. He's like, okay, then let's talk about it. Okay. I mean, you know

that Brad's doing this because you did something about his relationship. This is retaliation. Okay. I'm the one who came to you and told you the whole truth. Now, with the truth that I was flirting with some other girl who gave her my number and have been texting her ever since, sure, but at least I told you about it. No, no, no, no, no. Confession, listen, this isn't prison. This isn't like a court case.

Confession isn't gonna get you like maybe two less years off of this sentence okay you still did the crime sir. Alright well then you know what why don't you call her right now and ask her why you guys made out and he's like hey well um we're gonna need a phone charger because my phone just suddenly died all of a sudden. This was so fucking funny. He's like, I am going to whoops, my phone is dead. Are you just an idiot? No, it's like actually dead. So she has to go up to the bar and ask him to charge her phone and they have to like just sit there while they wait for their phone to charge because she doesn't know whether she can scream at every night, I die.

She's like, so do we just sit here silently until my phone turns on, you want to do a quickie in the back? No, that seems a little sketchy that your phone just magically died. He's like, it's getting charged, we're gonna call. I'm happy to call, I can't wait. Which goes, well, I just don't know who to trust, and I shouldn't even have to question my trust with you.

And the fact that you have a path to breaking trust, I'm kind of at a loss for words. I'm gonna ask you one more time. Did you do it? So then finally they get the phone, right? The phone is back. So he's like, okay, should I call? Should I do it?

She's like, just do it, Trevor. Should I do it? Just do it, Trevor. And he goes, wait, do you wanna look or something? So she just grabs a phone from him and she reads the text and it's this girl, Sammy, being like, what are you up to this weekend? And he writes back, hey, it's one of my buddy's birthday and we'll be celebrating this Saturday and Sunday. And she goes, oh my God, fuck off, seriously, Trevor,

you trash, you texted her back, you fucking liar. I'm talking to you, Trevor, I'm talking to you, I'm talking to you, I'm talking to you. He texted her back, he did not blow her off. That's a lie, you've been caught. So then she goes outside and starts crying and he goes after her and she's like, you're a fucking liar, Trevor.

He goes, how am I lying? Because you told me that she texted you and you said that you blew her off, but you texted her back. And then she throws his phone down and breaks it. He's like, oh my God, and you can tell she does this a lot because he's just like, oh God, now my phone's broken now. I mean, just look at it.

And she's like, no, you texted her, you texted her last, she blew you off. And he's like, no, but it said that I'm going to be celebrating Saturday and Sunday, not that I'll meet up with her. That's me blowing her off. I said, I'm going to do something. I'm going to do a celebration on Saturday and Sunday. And she's like, no, what you're saying is I'm going to be out celebrating and I'll come meet up with you. You're a liar. You just told me, you literally just told me at the table that she texted you and you blew her off.

You're a liar, liar. She's like, you are disgusting. And you know what? You are addicted to your phone. And so I know that when you're sitting there answering her and you're not answering me, you are disgusting forever. You are disgusting.

What did I do? What did I do to deserve this? He's like, um, nothing. Listen, I didn't do anything either. We're making steps in the right direction. Like we lived together. I mean, I've been really happy. Especially after I made out with that girl,

the other day, that felt, oh, sorry, I didn't mean to say that. I like when she was like, what did I do to deserve this? I'll tell you exactly what you did. You went back to this guy who has a pattern of cheating this petty cab driver who treats you like shit and you went back to him.

That's what you did to deserve this. Not blame me to victim, I'm saying that's what she actually did, how she wound up in this situation. So then she's like, it just makes me feel heartbroken because I've only dreamed of him being my person. I mean, look at him, he's the total package. He can pull a cab around with his feet. Sometimes he has sleeves on,

it's got a face sort of like, theodore from Alvin and the Chipmunks. Ah, I wanted him to be my person so badly, but he's not. I didn't want to cry, but I'm crying now. The end of the day, I really, at the end of the day, I care about the same thing that a mother cow cares about. Caves, calves.

He's such a good petty cat driver, I can't. And that brings us to the end of Southern hospitality. What will happen? Will she give him another chance? Spoiler alert. She will marry him, eventually. Yeah, she will. Yeah, or she'll just have like kids or something like she is addicted.

This is a addiction. She loves this kind of relationship. He loves this kind of relationship. He loves this kind of relationship. They will be toxic and awful and they will be a plague to any friends that they pick up along the way about, yes, the sea. One of many fights that they will have. Yeah. Good times.

Well, everybody, thank you so much for being with us for Southern Hospitality. We will be back again because we just keep coming back. That's what we do. We'll be here. We'd love you guys. We'll talk to you next time. Bye. Watch what crap ends. We'd like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alice and King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Strong to park with Caitlyn Clark. She's not just a sheela. She's a Daniella. Itch-o-o-s. Aaron McNickles, she don't miss No Trick-o-s.

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