Watch What Crappens - #2276 RHUGT: Depending on the Kindness of Rangers

Episode Date: December 29, 2023

Tensions rise on Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip: RHONY Legacy (S04E03) as Kelly accuses Kristen of being a “host.”  Meanwhile, Luann grills Kelly for withholding access to NY Rangers games.Watch with Crappens on Demand here:  http://bit.ly/crappensvideoSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hello listeners, this is Mike Corey of Against the Odds. You might know that I adventure around the world while recording this podcast. And over the years, I've learned that where I stay when I travel can make all the difference. Airbnb has been my go-to place for finding the perfect accommodations. Because with hotels, you often don't have the luxury of extra space or privacy. Recently, I had a bunch of friends come down to visit in Mexico. We found this large house and the place had a pool, a barbecue, a kitchen, and a great big living room to play cards, watch movies, and just chill out. It honestly made all the difference

in the trip. It felt like we were all roommates again. The next time you're planning a trip, whether it's with friends, family, or yourself, check out Airbnb to find something you won't forget. Hello listeners, this is Mike Corey of Against the Odds. You might know that I adventure around the world while recording this podcast, and over the years, I've learned that where I stay when I travel can make all the difference. Airbnb has been my go-to place for finding the perfect accommodations. Because with hotels, you often don't have the luxury of extra space or privacy. Recently, I had a bunch of friends come down to visit in Mexico. We found this large house and the place had a pool, a barbecue, a kitchen, and a great

big living room to play cards. Watch movies and just chill out. It honestly made all the difference in the trip. It felt like we were all roommates again. The next time you're planning a trip, whether it's with friends, family, or yourself, check out Airbnb to find something you won't forget. Hi, I'm Lindsey Graham, the host of Wondery's American Scandal. Our newest series looks at Aaron Hernandez, a star football player who shocked the world with

a brutal crime. But behind Hernandez's violent actions lay a much larger health crisis affecting the entire sport. Listen to American Scandal on the Wondri app or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watcher Crappins! A podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me as usual is the wonderful and hilarious and overall great person. Ronnie Kerrum.

Hi Ronnie, how are you? Okay, okay. All right. Hi, how are you? Hi, honey. Good to see you. Good to see you too. Good to see you too.

Happy Girl's Trip to you too. We are here to recap the third episode of Peacocks Real Housewives Ultimate Girl's Trip. season four, Rony Legacy. If you missed the other two, they're on our feed, so they're there. So go check that out. Really a wild, hilarious, fun time. I don't know if there's anything related to announce or to say at the top of the show, except that, like, this is such a funny show. So why don't we dive into this third episode. Is there anything you needed to say at the top of the episode, Ronnie?

No, go for it. Yeah, this is the end of the episode. This is a video, check it out, Patreon, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, that. Actually, this is a good point to make, which is that the crappies are around the corner. And there will be news about not just tickets, but voting yada yada yada. And we're going to change up the voting just a little bit this year. It should be very exciting. It'll be even more thrilling than ever before in your entire life. So, with that all being said, it's now day three. And are they in St. John's? They're in St. John's, right? St. John's. Are they? What kind of fan are you, sir?

I can't, you know, I'm, well, here's the thing between this show and below deck. It's St. John's, St. John's, St. this, St. that, you know, St. Croix, St. Norma. St. Norma. St. Norma. St. Bermuda. St. Florida. Yeah, well, you know what, go fight yourself, bitch, too. So, um, there was a lot of... Hey, Norma, sorry, that came out a little hat. It was, it was funnier in my mind, but then when I texted it, it came out a little aggressive. Sorry, Norma.

I'm like the food on any of your boat, you are a professional slag. Okay, me. Christmas Laddya. Merry Christmas to you too. So, Martin gets his first confessional of the season and it tells us, you know, in the beginning,

everyone was like, are you ready for the girls? They are kind of crazy. And I was like, is it evil coming into the villa? The answer, by the way, is yes. But they are actually very lovely. And I was like, is it evil coming into divila? The answer by the way is yes. But they are actually very lovely women and very respectful.

So. So he goes to Kristen and he's like, I have your girlfriend. She's like, oh my God, I love it. You knew what I wanted. And he's like, oh, you're about to call reception. And she's like, you can do that? He's like, no. you're about to call reception. And she's like, you can do that? He's like, no, there's no reception, stupid.

Okay, Susan, we talk to you later. And he's like, I mean, I think they are testing me a little bit, you know, like for me, there's no problem with that, I'm used to it. So she goes, by the way, last night, you were quite the dancer. And he's like, so far is my favorite episode of yours. Seriously, it was amazing watching you dance on that episode and saying,

Barrett, you were so good. I was, yes, and he tries to do a dance move, but his hand hits the tray and stills coffee off to the side. He's, oh, did I make you a little nervous? Oh, he's washing up. He's like, shut up bitch. Now listen, I know nature is nature and we can't really do much about it. And if we see it happening, we should just let it happen.

I mean, unless it's children or something like that, in which case smack them and tell them no. But in this case, a shark chasing a turtle, I don't need to see that. That is horrifying. Somebody needs to do something. Did you catch that? Who was a shark? Oh, my dear. By the way, I'm so glad you brought that up except forgot to write that down. I was like, a, amazing that someone caught this, but b, what is going to happen to that turtle? I was like, this is actually very terrifying b-roll footage. Presented as, like, welcome to the joyous tropics.

That turtle is about to go down. That turtle is dying, and guess what's gonna happen to the shark? It's gonna lose a cap. Okay? By the way, yes. It's gonna be like, why did I eat a turtle? Why didn't anybody warn me it was hard?

The turtle is basically like, toffee to a shark. It's like fun, lovely, you might lose a crown. So enjoy having to go to the dentist, the shark dentist after this. It's like when you eat an olive and you're like, hmm, what a delicious, huh, huh, I love olives in this great sound that boom, you eat like a little tiny pit that they didn't fully remove. Like Dennis who finished it. I remember when Dennis who finished it, I think it was Dennis who finished. He ate a, a he bit down on an olive and like the In like the Capital cafeteria and then he sued it. He sued the cafeteria

I didn't know you could do that. I've literally broken and tooth on an olive pit and guess what I a tortilla chip so Watch out everybody got a lot of broken teeth. Okay, so shark chasing turtle, not okay. Day three. Not okay. That's not a huge thing. Not cool. We don't condone it.

We know we understand nature is nature and this is the way things work, but guess what? We have to shift the paradigm. Okay, we need to have new conversations. So everybody's just getting along with day three. They're starting. Kelly and Luanne are doing yoga. Wish Luanne just please stop doing things that require vocal. Oh my God, please turn off the garbage disposal.

Find peace another way. It sounded like the entire villa was being loaded onto a truck to be moved to a different bar of the out. So Kristen meanwhile is dealing with the stairs going up from the bungalow. She's like, how do you stare? So I'm never gonna get any easier. And they're all just, Kristen then goes and tells the story about how Martin spilled his coffee and she's like telling it to the other women. Like she's like telling it to other women. Like she think it's like the best or she's like, oh my god, you guys won't believe it. So he came over and I was like, look like you're having a lot of fun dancing and then he spilled his coffee and they're just looking at her like, this is why you were fired.

Yeah. Hey, wow. He said, this is a fireable offense apparently nine decades ago, whenever she was fired with a long time. I'll tell you that. So then he gives them the pamphlets with the itinerary for the day and they have a cooking class with Sherrod coming up. And during this like cooking, we talking about, listen, I cook and I get, you know, I do

it with my breasts and get extra $50 now. I think that, you know, listen, to be real, I don't take lessons from people anymore. Okay, I'm too old. I just, here's what I like to see. I eat out. Okay, I eat out.

I always think like very frequently of the time when she and John were cooking in her kitchen and there was like, they pulled out a sheet pan from the oven and then he went and did something and came back and touched the sheet pan with his hands and burned his hands and she just stared and like, well, you guys, what do you get? Now you've loomed. I just always think, I was like, they're a danger kitchen. Also, the moment that she was like a cooking clash, I mean it's too late for me to cook. I was like I can already see Durinda getting actually kind of offended by this. Like why do I need to have a lesson? I was like oh she's gonna, this is gonna like trigger

her in some weird way. Have you not seen my only fan? It's cooking. Spoiler alert, I was trying to have a YouTube cooking channel about five minutes ago. So let me just announce on National TV, I don't cook. Don't try to make me cook. I can't do it. So Ramona and Sonia are getting ready in their room and Sonia is reading a headline off of her phone

about the Josh scandal with Ashley Madison and she's reading it. The headline says, Kristen's husband was cheating on Ashley Madison as Mr. Big NYC. Wow, he's quite fond of himself. So you know already that they're like, uh-uh, we're not, Kristen doesn't get to be let off that easy.

When we've had to deal with episodes upon episodes upon episodes with each and every one of our scandals, Kristen does not just get one nice dinner where she says, you know, this is my truth and I'm gonna move on. They're gonna bring it back. They're terrible. And I also forgot this headline

because it was so funny when it came out at the time but he went by Mr. Big and YC. Wow. That is, you should have done to him what they did to the real Mr. Big, okay? Bye. You should have been written him what they did to the real Mr. Big. Okay. Bye. You should have been written off a long time ago. Oh, I thought you meant the seminal 90s rock band

that came up with the song that said, I'm the one who wants to be with you. I'm talking about Mr. Big. From sex in the city to obviously the scouts naming himself after. Yikes. Not a good trajectory for Mr. Big, both fictionally and nonfictionally. Or Pelotonally. Well, they're still trying to recover both their hearts.

So Sonya's like, well, where's my phone? I want to say, yeah, Mr. Big, whatever. Everyone goes, whoa, what did he do? You know what? I mean, they were just texting people on the internet, okay? It's not like anybody saw him and like he didn't see the other person. It was just in text and so he's like, uh-huh It's a hook-up site Ramona Okay, well that's what the point so then Durinda Durinda and Christina at the table and Durinda's like, you know what? Christian I Thought last night was really fun and I think it's very brave the way you handle everything. You know, someone that's

stupid and as fired as long as you have would have really, I thought would have just been shattered at the table, but you really handled it well. And she's like, yeah, I mean, I mean, if there was something going on, like, I mean, of course, like, wouldn't you, if you, if there was something really going on, if you're really cheating, wouldn't you put an alias on the side? Like, there's just like so many things that don't even make sense. Like, I mean, he did use an alias, didn't he, Mr. Big New York City? Oh, Kristen, not knowing that they just put up his alias on the screen two seconds before

she says this sign. So then it cuts back to Sonya. She's like, he admitted to being part of the affairs website. He shared 33 private pictures. I mean, wow, he had discrete interactions with a very sexy woman. And he said he has no limits except for smokers. Oh my gosh, that's hilarious. No smokers.

That's a good one. That's good. I don't want to find someone, anybody, any kind of flag, as long as she doesn't smoke. someone anybody, any kind of flag, as long as she doesn't smoke. Christensen, you know, I just feel like I don't have to explain it to anyone since I know my truth, and this is my truth. So I was like, you know, he wants to define a woman who would be engaging socially and intellectually. I mean, that's a date if you ask me, I mean, I don't get intellectual or social, except

when I come, that's a date if you ask me. I mean, I don't get intellectual or social. Oh, except when I come, then I scream. I'm like, is that considered intellectual and social when you scream at when you climax? I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go,

I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go,

I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I'll just go, I mean the hard part was doing with all the bullshit on social media. I mean, I had to cover my ears for a whole year Well, stop covering your ears use those hands to slap, okay? Yes the same hands that you're using to do this can be doing this Yes Sonia's sonia's like well, you know Kristen said that any suggestion that he was a member of his bananas, do you remember when Josh told me I was bananas about my businesses?

And we see a flashback to Josh consulting with Sonia, which I had totally forgotten about. And she's talking about her like international lifestyle brand. And he just looks because you're bananas. So rude, but also funny. Sonya Morgan, soon you'll read the casita, Sonia, just Sonia, soon you Tart, Sonya Tarts, I think those are reform laws, but whatever I'll brand it, you know, that's just what I'm going to do. I'm

going to control grocery stores, retail stores, and the law. So that's really all I'm trying to do with it. And he's like, you are fucking loony to inflady. So we see why Sonya is bringing this up because she's got an old axe to grind. She will not be humiliated on television. And let's celebrate her business. Only fans around that.

Yes. One of those businesses still exist. But go off, go off. She goes, she goes, who's laughing now? Because I do have an international lifestyle brand. I don't want to go,, but there's a one. Yeah, Jordi says, hey, is that a one piece that you're wearing? Oh, took us Kelly walks up to the table.

That's what it is. I wrote down Kristen and I was so confused by my notes, but Kelly walks up and we're just like, Hey, is that a one piece that you're wearing there? Yeah, what's going on? This nice. And Kristen goes, is she trying to sell it? Kelly's like, yeah, that's going on, this nice. And Kristen goes, is she trying to sell it? Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Kelly's like, yeah, that's me. Bitch.

That's so, she goes, what is that? What is this? Is this cream? Can I use this cream? She says, it's something you gave us. So I guess that's just, oh, I love this. Yeah, people wish they had my products. Weirdos.

And then they like, she pretends to model it. And then Christians like, no, this is how you do it. And they're like, no, this is how you do it. So then after breakfast, Kelly, who wants to assure us that she is of sane mind and body these days, walks up to the chef's and goes, kooka, it's like, okay, well, that's a way to say hello. Okay, so they're getting ready to go and so I'm gonna decide,

so instead of taking the shower, she's going to go into the pool, okay? And then, because our salt water, so we see her skinny dipping in the pool, like she loves being naked guys. So then Ramona is basically, everybody's just trying to get everybody together, right? And then Ramona is basically everybody's just trying to get everybody together, right?

And so Ramona's, you know what? I'm ready to go and guess what? No one else is even paying attention to go. Why don't I get any credit for being on time with my credit? Yeah, because Ramona's gone around, after now that since Lewand yelled at her yesterday, Ramona's making a big stink about not only being on time, but reminding other people to be on time.

And also to lock that, she's sort of like locking down, we're gonna be ready at 10.45. So that way, like no one can say, I never said I wouldn't be ready. So she's like, excuse me, hi, Kristen, I just walked all the way down to this bungalow. Will you be ready at 10.45? Okay.

So of course no one's ready until 11.10. So Ramona's just sitting there and she's like, you know what, I'm sorry, I'm just getting blamed for being late. Sorry, I'm sorry, but I'm actually very much on time. Life isn't fair, okay, just get blamed for everything, okay? So then they get in the cars, Ramona, Sonya, and Lou are in one. And Sony's like, okay, that's your cameos everybody.

So they start talking about cameos. And Lou and I was like, what do you get for that? And Sonya does 99 and Lou and I was like, cameos everybody. So they start talking about cameos. And they went, I was like, what do you get for that? And Sonya does 99 and Luanne's like, I do 125. So I get a solid, well, I don't know. I guess even numbers, that even one, two, five, I don't know. There's a one in it. So I make my name money sometimes, you know? So then they're like, well, you know as long as we all

have to do cameos, let's do it together. So the three of them start doing cameos all at the same time. And the way I'm like a call center, it really is like when you get a call from a call center. And you're like, why are you trying to pretend you care about me when I hear 10 other people

on a call behind me? Up before the earth birthday, Johnny. I know it's on James. And your album. Your birthday. Whoa, you know it's on James' hands, your album. You birthday. Whoa, you know what? Get some more, you. Get some more, you.

Steffi, you're going married. I'm so excited that you're getting married. Do it. Wonderful day for your marriage day, okay? And I hope you have many gifts and you have a beautiful birthday whoever you are. Oh, sorry. You know what I'm keeping it in. People love the real me. So I just want to say one thing that really amused me is that when they got into the

van's, Lewand goes, what is this? A can of cat food? We don't see what it is, but I love that. I feel like it was probably just like, you know, some tape and Lewand's like, what is that? Cat food, I don't understand, it's round. That doesn't make sense in my home. Mm-hmm. So the son is like, oh my God, Luan, did you put the filter on?

She goes, I didn't know there was a filter on this thing. I'll do it, is there a tuner? Is there an auto-tutor on here? Not that I would need it. And Ramona's like, whoa, and I just want to say, happy birthday to you. They're like Ramona, you're not even doing the cameo.

I don't even have cameo on your phone Ramona. Ramona, you're holding up a can of cat food. So they get to just join them for all this time but then you would come to a blank screen. You know? No, I just won't be part of the fun, okay? So now they get to this cooking class and then so he's already flirting with the chef.

Hi, chef, how's it going? And Leuands, like, oh well, I guess it's gonna be one of those days, isn't it? So this guy, the chef says, he announces that he's gonna teach them all a whole bunch of new techniques. And Durinda's already bristling. She's like, oh, really? Did you get it, you could teach up,

maybe we'll teach you a few techniques. Some of us have been cooking for long since you've been alive. So you're what, you're saying a bad cook? You're saying a bad cook? I made a lasagna in the, in the burkshaers and everyone liked it. So what do you say about that? Mr. Person who cooks that in Ireland?

Yeah, I thought so. Go fuck yourself. I like it, Chef. Okay. I think if I was gonna do it all over again. It would be with the chef. No, it wouldn't. What were you pretending that you would really,

instead of like the head of finance at wherever, where you had Hillary Clinton at your parties? No. Maybe the first time. Maybe the first time. So they all get apron and stuff instead of a rich husband, literally nobody. And I'm a eater.

Okay, sorry, I can't go over it. The fantasy is that the chef, the chef lie. Right, the fantasy is that the chef will actually cook you marvelous food all the time, but every story is that chefs, when they're off the clock, never cook anything. So, like, why would I work? Why would I work when I'm off of work?

Because I'm married to chef. You fuck. That's why. Listen, I've seen the bear, and what I know is that when chefs are off the clock, they stare at horizons and think about their life. So it's great comedy. That's a great, really, really, really, laugh out loud comedy. You know what? When I saw that it was nominated for best comedy by the Emmy, I thought, thank

for thank God they finally chose a real, a real laugh out loud comedy where you're you're just hunched over from the tears are coming out of your eyes because it's such a funny, funny comedy. God would have married the bear. I mean, not John. I mean, he was kind of a bear. God, would have married the bear. I mean not John. I mean he was kind of a bear. God I'm just climbing that thing. Is that going to a rock wall center?

Except it was made out of, I don't know, the stuff that you go surfing in. With a material called surfing material. Slippery. It's also hairy. What were we talking about? Hey, you know what I like to make? Potatoes.

Potatoes. What do you call those potatoes that are chopped in a little tiny little slivers, but they're all kept together by the spine of the potatoes? The person that potatoes has the best. You release the least entertaining person on the view as a potato. Of all.

The least entertaining person on the view. Kind of the best version of a potato. You're saying it's hitting the view. Kind of the best version of a potato though. So they offer everyone a prince and they'll make us, oh, a prince, do we have to do some greasy things? I'm like, okay, the land calm down. So, wow, are you gonna oil me up, big boy? Hey, we're gonna do a fish. I'll show you a fish.

It's a cuckoo. I don't know. Well, I know we're doing some fish, but I'm kind of in the mood for some sausage. Oh, God, do me on the platter. Okay, Lewand. So, uh, the rent is like, I'm paying attention.

Not did I need to. Because I know I had a cook, you motherfucker. And so the guy's like, all right. Okay, well let's start this class. We're gonna start with cauliflower. God, flour. Yeah. Oh, Sonia, please don't eat that.

Already. He's like, please, please don't eat this. She's like, oh, is that what that is? Cauliflower with a little sauce? And let me try that. He's like, please don't. She goes, yeah, I have zero patience. Okay, I'm ready to learn whatever you're gonna to show us, which is to put that in our

mouth, right? Don't give it to Sonya. It doesn't agree with her if you know what I mean. She goes, well, you know, if it doesn't come out of the mouth, it comes out the butt, which is also how I did my sex life. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and it's commercial. It's almost that magical time of year.

Speaking of, what's your favorite Christmas story, Ben? Uh, hands down, the Grinch. Same! It cracks me up that he hates all the marimons. Right, and he steals everyone's presents. But then it's like so heartwarming at the end when the whole town is still singing and he realizes that there's more Christmas than just gifts.

Oh, I know, it hits me right in the fields. Best part is, Wondry has a new podcast starring The Grinch. And I think there's someone who wants to tell you more about it, Ronnie. Hi, it's me, the Grand Puba of Bahambad, the OG Green Grump, The Grinch. From Wondery, Tis the Grinch holiday talk show is a pathetic attempt by the people of Ruvil to use my situation as a teachable movement. So join me, the Grinch! Listen as I launch a campaign against Christmas cheer, grilling celebrity guests, like chestnuts on an open fire.

Your family will love the show! As you know, I'm famously great with kids. Follow Tiz the Grinch Holiday Talk Show on the Wondery app, or wherever you get your podcasts. So then Durin just like, okay so so chef, I'm really me loose. Okay, here's what I wanna know. Did you poach the cauliflower? What did you do?

You poached it? You poached it? Yeah, I can cook too. You really, really smart. Really smart with your terms. Okay, I thought I have a poach. Okay, I'll tell you who's poaching you. You're poaching the entire idea of cooking

from someone like me who's been doing it 40 years. All right, so shut the fuck up and tell us how you make your stupid kind of flower. So Ramana is like, whoa, you know what? You should do it the way the French guy did it. What sauce are you making? And he's like, oh, I'm doing a beef tartar with oyster mayonnaise. And she's like, whoa, oysters, don't keep down. Yeah, both oysters. You know what? We should roll that clip of how much I sexually love. With just, okay.

You have a watch out, chef. I mean, if you even are one, but watch out, be careful with the oyster mayonnaise. I mean, I see you married, but you might wanna rethink that. And so I'm like, oh, you're smart. You always check for the ring. I should do that sometimes,

because you know, it's a real dead end I never noticed that stuff And he's like well, I am a lover of all ladies, but really I love my wife and so he goes oh my god Did he just say I love old ladies? No, all ladies Okay, no offense Louie in Oh ladies. Oh. Okay. He's like, no offense, Louisian.

These women are like wild. Literally, are you single? Can you come to my house? Can we have sex in a chair? They're like, so wild. That's Kelly being like stupid people. So then this is where Durinda then actually speaks more about how she actually really likes chefs.

And she's like, you know what? She's very manly. I like someone who looks like you could chop wood. Like he's a guy who could chop a tree down for you, chop it into little pieces and make a nice skillet outside, and then make love under the stars, under skillet, which might hurt.

You have to let it cool down for a second. Hmm. So then, the way I was like, wow, wow, cutting a fish open, huh? This would be good to know on a desert island. We're gonna be fucking together, just you and me, my loving it. This will be real good if we're ever on a desert island and have all the tools to filet

a fish. I also like when they put them exactly, right? Thank God for all those stainless steel countertops on islands. I know if I'm ever on a ship and it's about to go down, the first thing I'm doing is running into the kitchen and getting myself a few little knives. Also when they bring out the Mahi Mahi's like, ladies, we have a Mahi Mahi for lunch. Everyone acts like they just want a car and the prices are right. They go, oh my God.

Oh my God. Oh my God. They lose their mind. Oh my God. Oh my, my. Bill is their mind. Kristen's like, oh my God, this is disgusting. Like, this is so gross. I thought this was going to be fun, but you're like cutting open a fish.

This is like disgusting. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Kristen, that's... Polka, you're eyes are still open. I'm so open. She's covering her ears. That's just her go-to move whenever she's traumatized. Yeah, the ears are not going to actually protect you

from this experience right now. And Kelly's like, I find that the chef's slicing the fish is like really sexy. I mean, like, the fish is just so fragile and then it's hand with the knife slices through it. It's just like this beautiful, beautiful combination. Like Kelly, for the first time in her life, has seen someone slice into a fish.

Mm-hmm. And some of you says, Wow, what a big bone that fish has. Can't wait to fuck that fish. What a fuck that fish. Okay ladies, all right. For fuck's sake, get out of the kitchen. So they go to the table and Chris is like,

that fish was disgusting. Like I can't, like I feel like I can that fish was disgusting. Like, I can't. Like, I feel like I can't even eat that. Like, can I just have chicken? Can I just have chicken is way grosser. Okay, now do a chicken, chef. I know, chicken is, if you watch a chicken getting butcher, it should be really in pain.

Sussan Ramon is like, you know what? It's like watching your wife eat a baby? Did you have to eat the baby Well, why don't I say that to deliver a baby deliver a baby Watching your wife deliver a baby and you have to eat the baby after you watch it, okay I think the waiters And then the waiters bring these like bring little like rolls or almost there's like breads and she went to go

What is that is that chocolate is that what is that it's all of bread really I love soup this is so good is it the cream? I just love it. and then Sony was like oh do you think we could take these home we could take these home. Chris was like what did you bring freezer bags? Oh no I have a plastic line bag like any Morgan would. I mean, as she tells us, I can't even have it, you heard about this? I mean, come on, guys.

I have a plastic line bag that if you're at a restaurant, you don't have to ask for the take home bags. You just put it in the bag and go. Just let me put it in the bag. Yes, there have been so many times Sonya's purse has been stained from food just leaking in her bag. Because you know she just shoves it right into her bag. Yes, there have been so many times Sonya's purse has been stained from food just leaking in her, because you know she just shoves it right in her bag. You know, so I don't know why they don't make leak proof to go containers.

I just started bringing my own. I can't believe it. So then the waiter comes over. After they did such a good job identifying the olive bread, the waiter comes over. After they did such a good job identifying the olive bread, the waiter comes over with more dishes. And the man goes, he goes, ladies, this is caviar.

Caviar, this is caviar. Oh wait, no, it looks like it's a crudite. Is it a crudite? I will take crudite for 500 Alex. Like, it's red snapper tartar. Oh, so close. So close. Something like that. Is it chocolate? Is this chocolate? Is this chocolate, isn't it? All right. Let's play a game now. Okay. Let's

try and let's try and confuse Leuand with simple food items. Just kidding. We already played that. You lost Leuand. You lost. Okay. We ready. So here's the game we can play. There's a class. Okay. So we can, we're in the class. We can ask somebody to join our class or we should say who should not join our class. And why is it named Kristen? Ha ha ha. Kristen?

Who's Kristen? Is it the hostess of this restaurant who decided to sit down and eat with us? So the man's like, well, I actually would have liked tensley here because I feel like she would have given me a ranger of tickets without any problems. No one I'm saying. And she's like, yes, and during this like, oh yeah, I would love to tensley to be here too.

That would be great, I would just love to. I love tensley, don't I? Don't everybody? Look at me not threatened by the young blonde lady at all anymore. Isn't that crazy? It would have been great. Don't everybody, look at me not threatened by the young blonde lady at all anymore. They're crazy. It would have been great. Yeah. So then we have a nice montage of Tinsley's greatest moments. Uh, climaxing with the time when they were, I think in Florida, and Tinsley's like,

Oh, the way I was, uh, and the way I was, excuse me. Yeah, that's right, the way I was. I drink, oh, I haven't a drink, I'm drunk right now, the way I'm. My favorite, Tinsley Momet. Oh, yes, the way I'm having a drink. Oh, I haven't a drink. I'm drunk right now, man. My favorite, Jensley Momet. Oh, yes, Lou and I'm having a good drink. I also like, my mom and sister are doing a viewing of Bambi, a viewing of Bambi tomorrow. How are they doing? You have to freeze them.

And then you do a viewing while they're frozen. And Ramana just being like, wow, whoa. Did they? Remimey, did that montage also feature her when she was, when Dinsley joined the circus and she had like the little girl, I don't think it did, right? When she was,

I'm miserable, I'm fucking miserable. With a little red circles on her cheek, screaming it down, the bleachers after the circus about that miserable she is. You can take Dinsley, I don't even care what it is, I will always think of that. the bleachers after the circus about that miserable she is you can say tensley I don't even care what it is. I will always think of that always they put tensley in the circus tensley Mortimer Remember she was like mom

I'm gonna be in the circus and it's like I'm finally back on the public stage mom It feels like wow you've come so far. You've fallen so low. And now you're being lifted so high onto a trapeze. Tinsley really, is that a trapeze? Like, finally I'm back. Me, Tinsley Mortimer. That's a clown for one night. No!

Next up, Garot Sparrow Fashion Show. She, and remember that it was all, not only was it that, she was like afraid of heights for doing the little thing that she had to do, but then Durrinda was jealous because Durrinda was like, I would have done it. I would have had no problem. I could be a good clown.

Because Durrinda wants it being the circus too. Durrinda got so jealous. She's always jealous. You know, this is a Kristen is not an anomaly You know, I guess Tensley just wouldn't do it. So Sonia's like yeah, well, she's ready rock She's dating a great guy now, so she just doesn't want to rock the boat. I don't really blame her and Kelly's like okay the people who cannot come to my class like I'm sorry, but like Alex from before Gross

Sorry, I can't. Weird. I just, I wanna know what's going on. And I want to like know that like what's going on in someone's life, I don't want it to be like inauthentic. And then we see a clip to Morocco, which again, Morocco always gets overshadowed by scary island, but Morocco also had a huge amount of Kelly being wild.

And there was that scene where Alex comes like walking in where Luan and Kelly are getting her done. I've even been walking. Alex, you remember Alex is always like, I'm a housewife and I am gonna make a scene. Deliver a message. Watch this. And then she would like make this big soap opera scene. So she comes stomping into the room and like flailing her arms and she's like Luan and Kelly just goes no No, we don't believe that. I don't like that that's too much. It's her no

She's no, that's weird. That's weird. What this is this is weird. This is weird like do it again Do it again like no, this is weird do it go back out and reentering it again. No, I'm not that ticker It's weird. It's weird. No re-enter. It's weird. It wasn't real how you did that. No, I'm not gonna re-enter. Be real. So then we cut back and the way I was like, oh, well, this is funny. All right. So I said to Alex, we just started housewives. Okay, and I was married to the count. There's you hold on holding for applause Alex is an excellent. Yes, okay, and So I said listen we I'm gonna be on this television show and we have to go out with these people

So we did and after dinner he said please don't ever make me go out with those fucking people again Never again. I will never do it again. Oh God to be young and Mar married into a rich family. So then you went out to dinner with Alex. Wait, I didn't know that you ever went out to dinner with Alex. Like, I mean, what the hell? Like, why did Alex get to go to dinner with him? And I never got to go to dinner with him. Weird. Lohan. So Kelly, who is mad at Lohan because she felt like Lohan, like Lohan was just using her for access to using Kelly for Kelly's access to expensive things.

Now Kelly is mad at Lohan that Lohan gated access to the count. So she's mad at that. And Lohan's like, well, I mean, we were really that close back then. And remember, I was actually a titled woman and I didn't really hang out with people like you. And Kelly goes, well, I'm jealous. Like, I'm like, why didn't I get to meet Alex? Well, I mean, we were still kind of distant if you think about it.

I mean, I hardly see you. And you're in the hands of all the time and you never call me. And that's on you. That's not on me. Okay, I posted my phone number all over Sag Harbor. And I say, Kelly, call me. You never call. And she's like, oh my God, so I go in for one day. Give me a break. She's like, yeah, well, you still never call. And you claim to be such a great friend. Why wouldn't you call me? Well, I'm sorry, but it's the

Rangers. It's the double dating. I love you, Kelly, but you don't follow through. That's it. The end. You don't follow through. And she's like, oh my God, everything I say that I do. Every single thing. Well, you've invited me so many times, the Rangers, and we're gonna go, we're gonna go. That's what you always say, we're gonna go. And Kristen's like, the other end of the table, is like, what's the deal with the Rangers?

Can't you buy her own tickets to the game? She goes, ladies, is the Rangers a hard ticket ticket to get it's not like T-Swift It's beyond the Rangers. It's the Islanders 2 and the Devils all the Tri-State hockey teams You never invite me to any of them. It's absolutely rude at this point if you're not gonna do it then don't invite me And this is the crux right right? Is that we thought before it was something more, you know, like surely the one has some deep seated resentment that you know, she's still holding against cut. Nope. It's that Kelly said she would take her to the Rangers game and Kelly is like, she knows I met my rich boyfriend at, well,

she doesn't say rich, but she, but we know. She says, she knows I met my boyfriend at the Rangers game and that's why she wants to go because she wants to meet a guy, a rich guy. Now, here's my advice to Luan. You have to reframe the situation because I know someone like this. There's someone who I know, who I know, who's like, oh my God, we have to go out to dinner.

We have to do this. And he's always saying this stuff And he's like next time I'm in town because he lives like in a different part of California He's like next time in town like we have to go to this place. We have to go this place for dinner We have to do this and then he comes into town and he never even like reaches out to hang out In fact, he's reached out to hang out. He's invited my boyfriend to hang out But he hasn't reached out to me and not like in a a fairy sort of way, just sort of like a, like, I don't know, it's just like shady.

And I would get so mad, I'd be like, you know what? This, you know, he's always saying we should hang out, we should hang out. And then like, he never follows the rule. He comes into town, he doesn't call out, I would get so, so mad. And then I start, and then I had this moment where I just realized like, fuck him, right? And you're like, fuck him. And then there's like so much joy that comes. And actually, I think like pretending to be, be like, yeah, oh, we have to do this, but knowing in my head, I'm going, fuck you, fuck you. I know

you're full of shit, fuck you. It is actually so rewarding to do that because you're like telling someone off to their face But they never hear it. Does that make sense? Yeah, that's called not telling people off to their face. No, but it's like because I can't I can't tell I can't tell them off to his face because of like it's You know, it was someone who does tell people off to their face like I've had to learn not to because it does feel better to not tell them off and just tell them in my head. Cause what happens is like you get yourself worked up like that and the second you really do say something, you're the asshole. You've lost.

Is it me because, yeah, you lose, you know, and is it because I put a brick through their windshield and call them all sorts of really problematic offensive names, probably. But, you know, whatever, I feel like I still win, because you ditched me for dinner so many times, I called my boyfriend to go out instead, but, you know, you lose that way.

And I felt it so many times. So I actually like that you've gotten good at just being like, really loser in your head, you know? Yeah, because it's like what you said. Like, if I were to say something, like sure, it's like, oh, I've now said it, but then I do look like the crazy one

and I've now caused drama in the group. And, but like knowing, I mean, obviously like the fact that I told this whole story and I went myself up on a frenzy, like obviously it bothers me on some level still, but I'm really out of place now where I'm like, I actually drive just more joy, you know, like when we go out to group things and he's there, we have, you know,

we always have a very fun time. It's always fun. But whenever he says, like, does the Kelly Benson own thing, like, oh my God, we got to go a ranger scheme. I'm like, oh, yeah, I can't, we totally have to in my mind, I say, you're a fake, you're a fake person right now. And I'm being fake back to you, but the difference is that I know that you're fake right now. And it just makes me feel good.

It makes me feel good in a weird way. So I'm just saying, Luan, go from being, don't go change from being the person who complains, like why don't you include me? To being the person who says, I don't need you to include me, because I've got so many other- But she does.

She does. She does need it though. That's the problem. She does need to be included, not because she gives a fuck about Kelly, because she wants to go find a rich guy at the Rangers she even admits it right now she is one maybe I'm a little upset of the Rangers games because of the hot Guys, okay, well that two things can be true so Kelly's like yeah, you know what the man only wants to be my

friend because like she wants me to invite her to places and to restaurants restaurants I mean and fight her to places and to restaurants. Restaurants. I mean, gross. Places where you only have dinner. She brings the restaurants again, which is hilarious to me. Like Kelly's the only one with accents to places where they serve food,

and she's just disgusted by it. So, when I was like, well, that's not the point. So then, Kristen rings a glass. She's like, okay, okay, this has to be translated. I have to translate this. She's like, okay, can I ask a question? We don't need a mediator. We don't need a mediator.

Just, we don't need it. We don't need it. Well, we need a mediator, okay? We do need one, okay? And cause this is one of the translate that. For the ask a question, go ahead, Melissa. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Those aren't even the same wrong names or when sentence.

You like messed up my fake name twice and I don't even know how to feel about that. How do you like rename me and then rename me again in one breath? Oh my god, another question. You're acting like a host right now, stopping the host. Just stopping the host. I don't like that. I don't like being the host. So because I think that Kristen acts like a host

because it's another way to be guarded. And she's always trying to ask a question. She's not a journalist. She's a friend, okay? So, Kristen's like, okay. So, I'm asking, it's not about the Rangers, right, Luma? And then I'm like, no, it's not about the Rangers. Kristen goes, okay. So so what it sounds like is Kelly has two places a lot and then Kelly doesn't follow up

She's exactly she's halloween. Yeah, I did it. She's like that's not true And you're not the host like what is a commercial break? You're not the host Sometimes you go to commercial break shut up Okay, host and run don't beat your rocket or Ramona ball. We don't talk like that in 20 23. Okay Okay, don't host. It's bad word. That's what I learned in sensitivity training Okay, the way I'm like all right. Well, I mean Kelly don't get defensive Much like a player on the Rangers when someone's coming towards their goal. That is how hockey works, right?

Oh, view. So I'm just pointing something out to Kelly. Well, I mean, it's just like, it's like, but with like, Kristen, it's always like, well, last time I saw this episode, a lot of us all this episode, fan, stupid fan who enjoys dinners. And Kristen's like, um, we're a table of six. So like, I just don't understand what you're talking about. And this is the fourth time you've talked about the Rangers. Like, who goes to the Rangers?

And she's like, um, so if you don't understand what we're talking about, like, why don't you just ask Lou Ann then? And she goes, I did just ask Lou Ann. And she's like, stands up and screaming. That is what I just did. Kelly is such a ding dong. And she is all, so I don't make sense. Oh, okay.

I'm the bad one here. Well, I'm just gonna eat this chocolate bread and just be quiet. So, okay, how is it? So, Kristen now says, I tell you, Kristen now says, I Kelly, Kristen now thinks, Kristen's saying that Kelly deflects it onto her, like stuff that she doesn't want to talk about, she just deflects and starts calling Kristen a fan or a hoe, so she goes, if she could actually tell us what's going on, then maybe she could break through and we could all stop talking about the Rangers

because it's not about the Rangers. So Kelly then's like people, people ask me all the time to come through events and they don't want to be my friend. And like if that's what they want to be, and he's like, you gotta stop saying that Kelly, you gotta stop, my hand's a table, you gotta stop doing that. He's like, but people do, they ask me all the time

for my connections, it's not fair, it's not fair that they do that. I'm just like, don't you know what? Don't do that to her, because it's humiliating, because we ain't no beggars. All right, nobody just tables a beggar. Sonia's like, does anyone have any spare change? You can just put it right here in my plastic line bag, thanks.

Sonia's like, well, work for beer. I know. Well, no, it's if, will work for beer. I know. But not to the seren-beggars. You know. So, Drendo says, you know, I think Kelly wants to feel very important. Like, once again, people want to use me for my fabulous contacts. Which I think Drendo's right on that one too. Oh yeah, I mean, Kelly's ridiculous. So, uh, so, it's like, what?

And also, Kelly has, doesn't she have access to a lot of that because of who her contacts are? So that's why it's like, huh? Married, like a world famous photographer. One like the creative director of L, you know, like I was... Yeah, and he like brought her into that world. I mean, she was a model too, so she already was in that world, but like, she even says even says later on oh I had to always go to all these parties with all these people it's like you also like you were yes all that stuff. There's just one a climber tries to call out another climber it's like what they do it's on the mountain be careful.

Be careful. Be careful. Be careful. So well you know what I wish I could say something about that, but I haven't had a sex you see with a crab. Yeah, give me time. Okay. So any of basically puts it has the best advice. She says, you know what? I have to tell Kelly this never dangler rich hot men in front of the man because she's gonna go I have to tell Kelly this, never dangly rich hot men in front of the man because she's gonna go, oh, like Pac-Man. And that's actually what it really boils down to also.

Yeah. And so Kelly is like, Durrinda, you have no idea. She's, oh yes I do because she talks to me about it all the time. So I do know. Just Durrinda? You don't have my life, okay? Like you weren't married because you weren't married because you know people. She's what?

Who gives this shit? And everyone goes, whoa, we don't have a life. And she goes, yeah, we don't have your life. Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly?

Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly?

Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? Why would you say that, Kelly? because my husband died and we had to shut it. That was that's a Dorenda's way of saying like, you better stop barking up this tree because I'm always gonna pull out the death card. And so I always bring Richard into this.

You know, I'm always gonna destroy this. I'm so sorry that that had to happen, but Richard, from what I hear, will he just wanted to go to restaurants all the time? And it was weird. That's it. I'm talking about Hinkley's, when did Hinkley's come into play? Also, does that have anything to do to the Rangers? I just want to make sure I understand all the time and it was weird. I'm sad. I'm talking about hinklies. When did hinklies come into play?

Also, does that have anything to do to the rangers? I just want to make sure I understand all the rich access things, which by the way, I looked up hinklies because I had no idea what they're talking about, and the hinklies are yacht. Yes, so I knew. Because I've read it. I didn't read it. It's pretty exclusive.

I actually looked on Reddit and someone said, does anyone know what a hinkly is? And then someone just said, Google Sora, speak Google Sora is about or something like that. So it was not helpful, but maybe the definition's up today. So Kelly's like, oh, the situation triggers me. I mean, it reminds me of when I married my ex-husband, and the reason I went to these big parties

is because he couldn't go to those big parties. Or like, he would go and then I would go with him. Whatever it was, I was just reporting for duty. And so like make me feel like my value is just to like get guys or go to events, which is basically my husband's value to me, which I just kind of explained, but still don't really get what I was just saying two seconds ago. Weird. She's a regular daisy if you can in that one. So, Dorenda's like, you

know what, you're really digging a ditch here, okay? So just, just stay on the focus, Kelly. So, Luega's, okay, well, here's what I do know. You're in the Hamptons, and you don't even call me to come on by. And so, Kelly goes, and with you, okay, by the way, I don't even care about Luega and said, Dorenda,, I really like you and I'm really trying to make a huge effort with you because I adore you. Excuse me, I was airing my grievances. You don't make an effort with me. You don't call me in SAG, Harper, bitch. So Kelly's like, and Kristen, like with you, like just please, stop.

Just stop trying to be the host, okay? Because like it's making it up stop trying to be the host. Okay, because like it's making it up, just stop stopping the host and they're like, oh my God, and during the cause I'm like, we're really circling the drain here, okay? So Loon goes to the bathroom and I don't know, Kelly. They decide to, they decide to go. They decide to go.

Yeah, okay. So then Christian Ramona and Durinda, Christians like, oh my God, I can't with her. And everyone's like, who? I'm just like, Kelly. Like if you're gonna talk about me, like the same thing over and over again. And Ramona's like, you know what?

I have to say, when you're right, you're right, Jacqueline. Okay. Right. And LeWann and Kelly's seat are in the staircase together. And LeWann's like, listen, you know, I'm sorry, Kelly goes, I just, I want you to know that I love you as much as I could love someone who's not in the same social circles as I am. She goes, listen, we need to have a deeper conversation, which is pretty extraordinary

because it's already pretty deep, right, my boys? But you know what, I don't wanna make you feel bad. I just wanna be invited to a giant room full of eligible men and you're the best one who could do that for me. That's all. And Kristen tells us, you know what, I can just get our free rangers tickets right now. I mean, I'm connected to the rangers,

like I'm happy to call. Lou, I'll invite you to a game. Whoa, you know what? I'm not even in your confessional, but that was very nice of you, Denise. And I'm enjoying Kelly's company. But you know what? She doesn't know how to express herself well.

And when she feels cornered, she's gonna, what's the people, what's that term that people use now? You know what? She's gonna be gaslighty, okay? She's gonna say, what? Are you the hostess now? Cause she doesn't know how to answer.

That's it. It's like wow, Ramona actually, did she use gaslighting to make you think you're crazy. Gaslighting is to try and make somebody else think that they're crazy, right? I'm not sure that's what Kelly is doing, but I think Ramona is attempting something there. Yeah, but she got close.

So Sonia is talking to Kelly and she's, you know, Kristen doesn't know what she's talking about. You know, she can't know what you and Luan had for all those years just by reading about it in the news. She can't know about it, but I can know about what's going on in Kristen Josh's marriage by reading in the news. Kelly says, she's a fan.

She's a fan, that's what it is. She's like a fan, that's all. She's a fan, which is a fan. That's what it is. She's like a fan. That's all. She's a fan, which is... It's so condescending, but it's also like... It's exactly the thing that hits Kristen's buttons and like... It's kind of like the perfect insult to get under Kristen's skin. So then they get back in the vans to go home and they're talking about Kelly in one van. And the way I'm like, I mean, listen, I just don't want her to feel bad.

Oh gosh poor thing, you know, it stormed me out there. I hope that she doesn't feel terrible. And Kristen's like, oh my god, you guys, we're on scary island again. Like, you remember, you're most amazing episode scary island. It's so good. This is like the same thing. I'm going to DVR this episode and keep it because like, it's good. It's a good episode. Hold on. Same for the other pen. I'm totally auto wrapping that for myself. I was so good and that's why. Oh my god. This feels just like April 23rd, 2013. Am I right? That's when Scary Island was filmed, but of course it didn't air until nine months later, which of course as we all know is February 14th, 2014. So then, do you like scary island?

Never went to my entire life. No, like, okay, we'll watch it tonight. She goes, okay, I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna watch it tonight. Chris is like, oh my God, I'm living it. I am a living once again. This is like going on the Universal Studio tours, but I was scary island.

Here I am, oh my God, I'm in it. I am in it. So they get back to the villa, and everyone's basically going to their rooms, and Kristen facetimes Josh, and she's like, oh my God, Josh, you have no idea the drama going on here. I don't even know where to start. First of all, last night at dinner, of course, they're in the brings up the whole drama

with you and I, and you know what? By the way, it felt so good. So I get it out there, same IP, so to speak I just, you know what, by the way, it felt so good to like get it out there, and say my piece, so to speak, like, you know, we went through something where clearly still together, great marriage, we should probably do some vows, cause that'll be good for a marriage too.

And it was really nice. And everyone was just like, good on you. You know, marriage is not easy, but like I felt really supportive. It would like really went well, and I don't foresee any other issues on this storyline going forward. I mean, they holding up fan Josh.

I mean, this, you've been called worse. No, I haven't, Josh. Check your text. Send you a text. He's like, oh, sorry, maybe you were called worse like that on a different website. So now it's nighttime and Dorenda is in her spaceship room and she's just watching scary island while she puts on makeup. She's like, hee hee hee. Oh God. Oh God.

I'm just trying to watch it because people keep referencing it, you know. I'm just trying to see. Is there a parallel here? Is there a parallel universe through this door? Really, really? I was just in the bathroom. How is this the bathroom? Ah, it's a necklace door. To toilet is, I mean, that is necklaces. Oh my god, what's happening to me?

You know, I'm seeing this now and it's definitely like a pattern. It all makes sense. You know, there's a pattern there and I'm not saying we're there yet, but the train is pulling up to the station. My true. Although you could actually say that about each and every single one of the cast members here. Yeah.

And they really are trying to get Kristen to break down about our marriage, and they're really trying to get Kelly to go crazy to have another scary island. I mean, they're just so ham-handed, and they've all done this for so long. It's hilarious that they are still so ham-handed about it. Thank you, Milway.

The producers said if we wanted huge ratings, we were gonna do another scary island. So here we go. Here we go with a dry island, scary island, fine, cue. So then Kelly, meanwhile, she facetimes her daughter, Teddy. I thought her daughter's name was River unless she has River and a Teddy, but she calls Teddy and she's gonna kind of compete

with Lisa Barlow in child names, because she goes, hi, rabbit, has my little rabbit princess, it's like little rabbit princess. That could be, that could theoretically be up there with baby gorgeous. And a little rabbit princess. Yeah, and she's telling her basically what happened.

She's like, I mean, come on. I mean, should I invite her? Like, maybe I guess I should. Like, if I invite her, then I guess I should take her. And her kids like, Mom, don't worry about it. Just like, have fun. Don't be nice, Mom. She's like, I'm always nice.

But she has a good point, though, when she says, everything I say, nobody can hear what I'm saying. They're all trying to make this into another scary island. They love to say you're not making sense, but how can everyone make sense when they can't even like finish the sentence? Okay, that's true, because I feel like Kelly saying you're the host, they were acting like,

oh my God, that's the craziest thing for her to say, what does that even mean? When I think it's kind of obvious what she meant, she's just not very good at explaining herself. And everything she says, like, oh my God, Kelly, you're crazy right now. Well, but she is, she is crazy. She is.

And the thing is, so like, I don't know if I fully agree that the women are trying to actively make push Kelly to become a crazy island, because I feel like they are in some ways trying, they they keep on saying as we'll see in the next scene You know like okay, this is how we deal with Kelly, but they can't help it because Kelly Becomes kind of out tenacious is not the right word But like when she gets annoyed she starts going into a loop and it drives them all nuts And so they kind of but then they push her into the loop

But then the loop pushes them into a different place. It's just like a terrible combination. And I like the daughter. First of all, the daughter says, by the way, those ranger tickets are reserved for me. And then the daughter says, by the way, mom, so I just wanna just put this out there. I think this would be like really good for you going forward.

You tend to over promise things and like you can't really follow through and then you can't deliver on the promise. So I just want to put that out there, Mom, which hopefully made an effect on Kelly because that's literally the same thing that Luanne said earlier that day. And now her daughter is saying the same thing to her. Kelly because that's literally the same thing that Lewand said earlier that day and now her daughter is saying the same thing to her. Yeah, so now they all get dressed and Kristen has to come up with those downstairs again, poor thing. So she goes to Durandas room, and she's like, why is she that white scary island?

If you watch that, she's like, um, yeah, of course. I mean, no, what? It's me? Watch scary island? No. What are the clothes? What's TV? Yeah, Kristen. Oh, okay, okay, Kristen. I know.

Now, Kristen's eyes, I shouldn't watch scary. Of course, she watched it. So, Durin does like, you know what it is with Kelly? I don't think that she lays confrontation. And Kristen's like, why are you whispering? I don't know. But I like her. You know, she gets, she just gets unraveled.

And I don't think that you were saying anything wrong, you know, or you or Leuand. It's just that she's not going down a thing. And he just got to say, Kelly, this is not about anything, you know, that, but what I'm trying to convey at this moment. And this is all funny because later on, Durinda does not follow any of this advice. No, Durinda is the biggest tip of her, and also Durinda doesn't understand that she is a loop. Like she is the same thing over and over for years in years. Let me get everything.

I'm in fire. Let me spin on fire. You know, she's the same kind of loop. It's always starting out. Like look at me, peaceful Durinda. And like in two seconds is going to be yelling and screaming at someone. But I think Kristen really, really nailed it. Once she goes, yeah, but it's also just understanding

because she doesn't understand anything. Yeah, because the minute it goes, I think you need to calm down, she puts her hands with, just need to slow down. But she's like, yeah, but she doesn't know it. What's going on? By the way, I was just thinking about it. Like, yes, Chris Kelly is always on a loop.

Daringa gets on a loop. Sonia gets on a loop. The wind gets on a loop. I don't know about Chris enough if she gets on a loop, she feels like she has a light loop. Oddly enough is the only one who doesn't really get on a loop from Mona, because I don't feel like Ramona gets on a loop.

Because I think she, at this point, she knows well enough to say, you know, because I think she, at this point, she knows well enough to say, you know what? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. She just exit her loop. She just gives up on her loop. That is her loop.

That is Ramona's loop. To be affordable. You know what? You know what? You're gonna be bossy, condescending, and they go, you know what? I'm so sorry. I just wanted to apologize to the bottom of my heart,

because you know what I'm sorry. I'm like, kind. She's just on apologize to the bottom line. What? Because you know, I'm sorry. But I'm kind. She's just on a larger metaloop. She can't. So Chris. So loop that repeats every single episode so far, fucking Ramona, you know, they're all on a loop. I think Kristen just hasn't been on long enough

for us to really see her loop. I think Kristen's new loop is, can you help me out here a little bit? Because that's what she does the rest of the episode. She's like, can someone help me? Can someone help me with this? Can someone join in with me on this? And they're like, no, you're on your own, bitch.

Anyway, so I do render and take pictures of each other, like really pretty pictures. And Kelly's like, oh my god, my hair is disgusting. This smells like an ord fork. LAUGHTER I just want to also, before we go too much further, I have to say I deeply laughed when Durrindo was trying to find something in a room when Kristen was there and she goes, you know, this is what I do all day. I can't I can't find anything

in my room. I just open up doors all day and the spaceship. So then Luan goes to Ramona and Sonia and Wachelle is sitting with Kelly outside so they're kind of separated. And Kristen is talking about like, oh Kelly, so wow, we get to hang out, that's good. So our thing is good at home. Oh my God. Barbara Walters, yes, my kids are good. So how are you feeling at lunch? You good?

Really? Oh wow, take the microphone away. Take the microphone away take the microphone away By the way at this point no one I don't think anyone is clear that when Kelly is saying stop acting like a host She means like TV host as opposed to dinner party host because I don't think she's clarified us So clear to me because she tells her like you're not a journalist like she all she does is ask I mean I get it, but I don't know. I am a little unbalanced as well,

so maybe like I can hear it. I mean, I don't know, but to me, it's very clear what she's saying. She just doesn't have a wide range of communication. Yeah. She's cool. Well, at this point, they all know, but they just keep looking at her like she's crazy.

And I think Kristen knows, but she's like, listen, I'm supposed to add, like we're on a TV show. You have to do that. And Kelly says, well, the first day, you just started asking all these questions. And she's like, I'm supposed to. You fucking Nimrod, like I'm supposed to ask questions. I mean, she's like, I mean, I think you're an amazing person,

even though there's no evidence to support that. But if you're not present, it's gonna be a problem. You just need to be present, okay? and then me while Durinda goes over to Luann or Munsonian goes guys, I Just what's the Gary Island? Somebody hold me and I was like, whoa, you just watched it today? whoa, whoa, whoa, so they're like, wow, they're in the, so then back to Kristen and Kelly and Kristen's like, okay, I'm just like, you're to have a good time.

I'm here to have fun. I'm here to dance. We're not here to do that. We're not here to do that. We're not here too. Okay, we're not here to have a good time. We're not here to have your commentary on what we're doing. Well, somebody's gonna have commentary.

Okay, somebody's gotta get get somebody help me out here. Martin, can you come in here? Can you just somebody help me out here? Cause you're acting like you're Andy Cohen and you're not Andy Cohen. Just stop, like you're not. Is he here? Is he here, is Andy coming?

Is he here? Is he here, is Andy coming? Uh, uh, uh, uh. And then Kristen tells us, hi, I'm Kristen from Calabastas, California. Kristen from Calabastas, California has a question. And she wants to know, Kelly, what the hell are you talking about? So back to Durandeshik.

Okay, the girls' spirals. That's what she was doing today. I just saw him on the TV and he thought in real life, she's getting manic. And Lohan's like, yeah, she gets defensive and inappropriately weird. Okay, not to steal the term from Kelly Benzmone, but it's weird. It is, it's weird. What is that? A buffalo coming down this staircase?

Sorry, I just want to do a little flashback to Alex McCord. So Kelly is like, Kristen, you're covering something up. I don't know what it is, but you're covering something up. She was like, well, I would love to know what it is because I'm not covering up anything and my marriage is great. Well, I know that you're trying to tell everyone that like what's like, I know that you're trying to tell everyone what's going on is a cover up for what's going on. So think about that for a second.

Just stay in the moment, be present, okay? Like I'm just calmly encouraging you to stay in the moment because like if you want to be a fan, then you shouldn't be here. You're like a fan host. You're like a host that's a fan of something that like needs fans but also a host. Do you know what I mean? Um, I have friends on other shows and if I have friends on other shows like it could be Jeopardy. It could be like any... I don't have friends on Jeopardy so please stop. Okay, you're officially, you've officially crossed the line. It could be like any... You don't have friends on Jeopardy, so please stop.

Your officially crossed the line. I am friends with my ambiolic and Ken Jennings, okay? And like, I'm gonna watch the show because my close friend is on it, okay? And I'm like catching different shows because I know girls, because I'm watching, because they're my friends, not because I'm like Googling and super fanning out and you're busy at home writing books. I just don't have any watching Bravo.

Well, that makes us not like you're a fan then. Yeah, it's like you're a fan. It's okay. And Kayle is like, I think you're just like, you're like covering up something. Is she, what the bank? Yes. I mean, listen, I think you're trying to host a show.

I mean, you're basically host, so host. So then a remoteo comes out, okay, you know what, girls? Safe arguing for dessert. Everyone knows that because arguments happen after desserts. That way, you say you wanna walk out. You've already eaten your meal, okay? So questions like, no, no, no, we're gonna finish this.

We're gonna finish this argument. Fine, can we finish it quickly, please? They're hot men at the restaurant. I need to wrap my legs around. And Kelly's mocking her. She's like, oh, here we go. Story time with the host. And to her.

Because, yeah, Kelly, Kelly. See what you just said there? That was kind of sending a shitty, Kelly. Okay. And you guys really cut fitnessy, Kelly. Yeah. You're being a cut fitness right there. Don't be a cut fitnessist.

I don't like that word, cut fitness. I don't be a cut. I don't like that word cut fit I don't like that word. I don't like that word. You know what he said British word and I'm basically British because they said so one time I got you bring your mouthfully hair. So I don't like basically British I don't catch me in London one time where I didn't wear it and so I'm really cashmere is weird cashmere is where like house where Hush mirror you said I was for cashmere. Thank you. That's where I don't like it. You're a very you're a nightmare. What's the name? What's where cashmere? Yeah, it's weird. You laugh. You're very cut fit and see. Hey, so I'm saying about it. Well, use a different word the next time.

I don't like that word. Okay. I'm used to British. So. And Kelly's like, oh, I'm Bratty. I'm not a bitch. She's, well, that's good. Because I think I used to tonight.

Cause you cut fitness. Okay. And she's like, I'm not fanning a hold. I think, okay, Kristen, we've dropped this, Kristen. So they get to the restaurant, and Luanne tells everybody, wow, it's been an interesting ride, we just found out, Sonia's a pretty kitty. And then we get a clip of two seconds ago,

of Sonia shockingly showing everybody her badge. Is this, did Luanne just find this out? Luanne's, I think this is the first time that Sonia has showing everybody her badge. Is this, did Luehne just find this out? Luehne's, I think, this is the first time Luehne has flashed her badge. And I feel like this happens on the daily with her. Yeah. It's certainly not the first time. So the waiter is one of the guys from last night and I'm like, oh my God, it's you from last night.

He's like, oh my God. I know he's like damn it. He drew the short straw. And Sonia goes, can you remind us of your name? Because Jordan, and they all go, oh, Jordan, Jordan, his name is Jordan. Oh, well, Jordan, I never thought I thought of him as Robert. Well, Jordan, nice to meet you. Jordan, yeah, wow, that's very exciting, Jordan, yeah, Jordan. What, you know what?

I've, like, last night, like we went a rest, asked around, everybody in the restaurant, what's the misconception of you? Okay, so, I'm going to ask last night, like we want to rest, ask around everybody in the restaurant, what's the misconception of you? Okay? Like with me, there's a game everybody by the way,

didn't announce it, but it's a game. Okay, I want everybody to say, what's your misconception? Because with me, no one understands it. I'm very kind and nurturing. Okay? To me, the end word is nurturing. Say, say, something that word is nurturing. Sit.

Sit. Something that people just don't get. They think that maybe I'm hard or abrasive. But you know what? I'm nurturing. Sit. A lot of people think I'm racist, but I'm actually a very kind-hearted person

to other wealthy people, okay, who mostly are white, okay? So, Dorenda's like, you know, your heart is good, your heart is really, really good. So Dorenda's like, she's like, you know what? Ramona is rude, but, you know, she'll, if you need a number, she'll be like, you know, but she's also good. She really is only nice to you, she likes you, and she doesn't like you, then watch out. But still. And so, Kelly's like, I would say Ramona is like a good mom, I guess.

I mean, I really have no evidence of that. But, um, carrying, I don't know, I don't know, giving in kind, yeah. I don't, I don't know about that. So during this, like, okay, Kelly, your turn. And he Kelly goes, people think that I'm and somebody goes you're crazy No people think that I have all this money and there's like a massive tree and like I just take money whenever I need it But I'm like self-made my husband gave me nothing love me with absolutely nothing. I raised my girls on my own Okay, okay.

First of all, that is not true. Everybody knows that that is not true, okay? But that is not to take away from the fact that she actually is a very successful real estate person. But to say that your husband, I've seen nothing isn't true. Didn't she say in her season that husband gave her an apartment?

And then they sold that apartment for like $15 million. I mean let's stop acting like you and your kids are living out of the back of the car here with nothing. Now that said, doesn't mean that you're not very successful. I looked you up. You're very successful real estate mogul. Okay, Kelly Benzmoz sold over 19, could billion trillion dollars of real estate. That's it. You know why? Because she poses in her own real estate pictures. You want a dining room? $19,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, biggest misconception they might have of you. When I think of Kelly Benzmone, I don't think like, oh my God, look at that extremely wealthy woman. That's the very first thing that comes to my mind with Kelly Benzmone. No other things, especially not purchasing just carry island. Come to my mind. I just think of all the money she's sitting on. So then, um, Lou Ann's like, I mean,

Kristen is still the only one married. So let's give a cheers to Kristen again before we rip her down again. Or let's do that. And so he goes, Oh, Kristen, you just handled everything so well last night. We're not going to bother you about that anymore. And Kristen goes, yeah, well, there was no other way to handle it. I mean, she's, yeah, okay, well, we want to talk to you, Kristen, well, there was no other way to handle it. I mean, it's just, yeah, okay, well, we want to talk to you, Kristen,

because we just want you to be comfortable with us. So now this is our new tactic. So she goes, well, who says I'm uncomfortable? It's just, well, you know, the other night when we talked about your husband and the night before that and then it breakfast and then it lunch, too, and then between when I was skinny, I was still talking about it,

but I just don't think you were comfortable enough. We want to know about the pain that you went through, the pain, not just the fact that you know it was public, the public size because you're on TV. How hard was it to be publicly humiliated? Well, actually, he didn't cheat on me. So there's that. And Sonia's like, okay, yeah. Sonia says, like, she gets it, that Kristen's protecting her family. And the man's like, well, I know a thing or two about cheating, and I know a thing or two about being cheated out of rangers tickets to. And I think Kristen decided to turn the other cheek.

And I almost said other ass cheek, but she doesn't do anal. Or he wouldn't have cheated. I mean, who cheats when you do anal, am I right? I'll be here all week. Oh, we're good. So I love that Sonya acknowledges. Chrisins just trying to protect her family, because she's got kids, and the kids are at an age

and they'll be watching this, or they might watch it, she's protecting them. So I'm gonna go in there even farther. You know, about 75 transactions on Ashley Madison, Dolly Mads, whatever you want to call it. 2070 transactions, yeah, she's what's going on there? Oh, yeah, 75 transactions. That's when someone wants to cheat on their wife because they won't do anal. So you buy 75 things for someone on the internet on the Dolly Madison website.

That's what that means, Derinda. Well, he went on a website with a group of friends and that was it. That's it. And the man says. Well, he went on a website with a group of friends, and that was it. That hit. And the man says, oh really, what happens on this kind of platform? I don't know. I have no idea. And Chris, I'm like, I don't either. Oh well, is a dating thing? Is it a sex thing? I don't know anything. All I know is my drool. Did you ever look it up?

Did you like, because I would have looked it up. Did you look it up? You want to look it up? We can look it up together. You want to look it up? You want to look it up? We can look it up together You want to look it up? You want to go? I got it. Christen, this is how it's wives as a fan. You should know you are not just a lot to come on here and say my truth over and over again And then you're off. That's not how it works. They are gonna make you talk about every little fucking detail Listen, you're a weak woman. So you want to turn the other way. We get it. It's just no. I know my truth And like why do I have to go on a website if I already know my truth You know and when they goes fishing if someone said like to read the medley is unhappy go lucky dot com I'll be like what the fuck is happy go lucky dot com is that what they teach you how to cook just one motherfucker

I know how to cook already. You know that's different than your mom bitch. I know happy go lucky dot com I fuck like per cons on that side Hmm make a lot of money too and during this like I would elect it every single transaction I would have called the person I would have found out what time it was charged Listen, I did it with John all the time now were they all pizza places? They were They were but you know what? I trust your instincts Yeah, that's true. I mean it was terrible when I found out that John was on the Ashley Madison also were, they were, but you know what? Tracer instincts.

Yeah, that's true. I mean, it was terrible. When I found out that John was on the Ashley Madison also, I'm, did I say Ashley Madison? I meant pizza hut calm. Well, God, that was a part of it. There's New York's likes. Like, you know, love transactions. So Kelly's like, she's like, how dare you?

I'll say New York City people then. She's like, I don't know, I don't know. So Kelly goes, she goes, she's a Google source. She loves to Google. She knows. So then the food comes and Duranda starts losing her mind over black cards. Hey, that was your black card.

I'm gonna have to, I want to get the black card for sure. I want to show, okay, on a scale of zero to 10, how is your black card? I really need to know about the black card for sure. I want to show, okay, on a scale of zero to 10, how is your black card? I really need to know about the black card. I was like, wow, Dorenda's obsessed with that fish right now. So then, Chris, so they order some stuff. And Chris, like, who please have some salad too? Because they just order fish after fish, after fish,

after fish. And so Nick goes, yeah, especially after you saw my pretty kitty, no more fish for her. And then Kristen's just like, woo, woo, woo. So Kristen, how much you have to pay for 75 transactions? I got it, right back at it. Read this on my phone, read it on my phone. And we're almost like, oh, whoa, here it is.

I can't believe this is up here on the telephone, okay? Here it is, Ashley Madison website, okay? Wow, wow, wow. It's in the fierce site, it's in the site for the fierce, I wonder if Mario's on this. I don't know, you know what site I'm on? Nurturingwomen.com, okay? No, this is, I'm a failure.

I'm a gift of it. 20 dollars, guess what, spoiler alert, your gift is caring. Sit. I don't see color. slash nurse drink person dot com. Okay? So Ramona's like it's a sight for men to have a fierce and Kristen's like um Yeah, it was for married people. Yeah, it was Well, that doesn't track like okay doesn't track that you didn't Google it at all. Like why wouldn't you Google this site?

So now Kristen has decided she's not gonna win. So now she's like, oh wait you guys didn't know? Yeah, it's a site for married people. Let's go have some first. No, she's just like what? Like I thought we already all knew that. Okay, I'm now past the my truth portion. But at night, I think the reason why she said,

you guys didn't know that because she was saying, like you're acting like it's crazy that I didn't Google it, but you guys didn't Google it. Oh. I think that was my interpretation of her of Kristen Logic, but it also could be very much your interpretation too, or a mix of both. Who knows?

And who cares, really? I don't. So Ramona's like, whoa, you know what? You said she didn't know anything. He was on this site to have affairs. He goes, oh my God, I've explained this multiple times. Except that you haven't, you have not. You have said he didn't cheat on you.

He went on there with a group of friends blah, blah, blah. And Duranne goes, nah, you haven't seen you just go to Durantet. I didn't care. We didn't know it didn't matter. You did care. You did care. You did care. Which of course she did.

Oh my God. Yeah. Sonny is like, because you know, Christians, Christians, Kelly's like, your heart sinks. Like if your heart doesn't sink, you don't care. So, and Sonny is like, yeah, we just want to bond with you

and then just be more intimate. So, if you'd like to cry now, that'd be a great time to do it. So Kelly's like, yeah, I'm shocked. I'm shocked you don't have a motion right now. I do not have a motion. You're just like a fan and a host with no emotion all at once. Yeah, again, Kelly. You know what? Don't talk to it like that. Okay. So it's yeah, but you don't have a motion. And if it was me, my heart would sink. Yeah, well, that's you, Kelly. And let everybody's you crazy pants, okay? And so, Kristen's like, Kelly, how long were you married here?

And then the man just goes to the side to Durenda. She goes to Durenda, she goes to Durenda, put down your hands. They're pointing, cause Durenda's doing the Kelly. Nighty is the king. It's hard to believe, she's directing like a Jetson's traffic. Just like, Durenda's like, who the tie the most?

Durenda's doing the circle, you go to the game, you do a loop, you loop, you go in the back He got it tied up so Kelly is like I was married for 11 years just I just find out how you handle things and Chris I goes um could someone help me here? Durinda during this like all right, but I I wish I could help you but Lorraine has literally tied up my hands under the table So I just I've never heard a woman outside of Hillary Clinton say I don't care about an affair or anthropocals. Death not what she said Kelly you do have a way of making her a simple tin and I'm not gonna I'm not diving with that okay how would you like it if I said

I just watched scary island and you're not in your crazy by the way I just watched scary island you're not in your crazy okay yeah okay I'm not doing that because it's purple right now, but in about two minutes I'm going to. Okay, we're all multifaceted people. I mean, look at all the faces I can make. And just one second, so what you're saying is that any woman that's been cheated on, she's just be like,

it's fine, is that what you're saying right now? Yeah, you're going to simplifying it again. She said it was hard, is that what you're saying right now? Yeah, you're going to be simplifying it again. She said it was hard, she's so difficult, but she chose to say, that's what she decided, that's what she's saying. So Sonia is scratching her neck with her knife because it's Sonia. And Chris was like, well, I chose to stay at home

and work on my kids and work on my marriage. Because like, you know what's the opposite? I became a model and I got my degree and I went back after fucking scary island and I got my MBA. So I'm so sorry about you and your whole year of the vow and you put your family together will I raise my family on my own and I don't have a Josh. I did it on my own. It's just a man worth hundreds of millions of dollars probably.

So I don't appreciate you saying how amazing you are because like that is an offense. That is an offense to single mothers everywhere. What are you talking about? Is that... It's literally like nobody is criticizing you as a mother. Except for some shitty comments I just made. But I only made those shitty comments because you're like, I did everything on my own. I mean, give me a fucking break, you know?

But nobody's talking about you. Kristen's like, I never said any of that, Kelly. Yes, you did. You said that. Oh, I didn't get my education because I was provided for my husband. I got my education when I was 20 years old because I had to be a model.

Kristen literally never said anything about your education. Also, a majority of people got their education around 20 years old too. That's like literally how the college just to work. I had to go to college from 18 to 22. How about that? Because I had to. Because I'm not angry at her. I'm angry at women like you who talk like that. It's like, thanks. You do it to service to all working women. And Kristen's like, oh my God, like what does this have to do with anything? So the way I'm like, I mean, maybe Kelly's looking

to this like a mirror, like I was able to work out my marriage. So Kristen was and now I hate her. And so, Doreen is like, would you be happier if she just left and broke up her family? Is that what you would make you happy? Because then I see you make me kind of happy. Who caviar caviar? In the middle of all this fighting, I was like, caviar caviar is arrived.

So then Kelly is like, okay, why don't you just tell us to Rindyka, oh, because Rindy goes, what's the point, Kelly? And she's, why don't you tell us, you're sitting there listening to it? You know what you're saying seems not it seems really crazy. Kelly starts going crazy wild cookie right? Yeah, well I just want to get ready in part two okay. Part two. Oh yeah, all right Kelly goes oh yeah well once you have another cosmo

to render which I am shocked that you're going to not just start yelling at Kelly at that point. I love that Kelly is not afraid of doing that. Listen, is Kelly in that case? Yes, but I think again, it's pretty clear what she's saying here. She's like, it sucks that your man cheated on you and here you go right back to your fucking husband for the money. When I had a, I don't think it's fair of Kelly to say it.

I don't think it's fair to tell somebody that. I mean, a lot of people's, we don't know what's going on as someone else's marriage. And for whatever reason she decided to work out, that's up to her. You know what I mean? It's not a Kelly's fucking business, but I do understand what she's saying.

Like, I understand the logic of what she's saying. And everyone's like, what? You're crazy. And during this thing, you're crazy. That's saying and everyone's like, what you crazy and to remember saying you crazy That's crazy. It's scary Island Park to okay cuz I watch scary Island Park to redness the table So I'm like the Kelly was like fuck off drunk Drunk oh you want to make comments you want to drive commas is that what you want to do? I mean to Rinda you've been after me all day like caviar. I don't want some caviar It's at the table rich people, is anyone want some caviar? It's at the table. Rich people food.

Anyone, anyone want some caviar? He said, I said a match. And now the fight. And now this is what you do, Kelly. He's like, oh, I said a match. And now the house is on fire. What happened? What happened? That's what you do, Kelly. Kelly, because I know what, don't run your bluestone manner bullshit on me. Which was funny, but also for as much as Kelly talks about how she's not a quote unquote fan, like how she's like, oh, Kelly, Kristen's the one who's watched all these shows. Kristen's the one who's such a fan. Here comes Kelly dropping a reference of bluestone manner.

Okay, that is kind of fanning to me. Hmm, so, um, we're gonna go ding, ding, ding,, Remina goes ding, ding, ding, okay? Ding, ding, ding, ding. I'm gonna make a toast. And I'm like, oh my God, we don't need carbs at this table, Remina, and stop dinging the glass like that. You're gonna break it. You'll break it into the caviar.

We paid a lot of money for this caviar. I'm not gonna have charge of your fucking glass in it. So, you know what, corn voices, okay?, I'm not gonna have charge of your fucking glass in it. So, so, you know what? Come, voices, okay? Cause I'm gonna get into jettin'. Nobody wants that, okay? Ask the people in Colombia. Okay, really girls, you're not being fair with mature. I have something I'd like to add to that.

Shit, I lost my Trina thought because I'm eating caviar, which is something she literally said. She literally said I lost my Trina thought because I'm eating caviar, which is something she literally said. She literally said I lost my turn of thought because I'm eating caviar. It is, and I think that we need to respect Kristen's choice. Okay, and Kelly goes, I agree. I agree. Okay, so Kristen's like, I just wanna say, like it's been, oh no, Kristen, I just wanna say,

it's been like eight years therapy, it's been very upsetting, it's been very embarrassing and upsetting, and I decided to stay with my husband because I love my husband And then I guess well cheers for that Jesus Christ finally. I'm not done. I mean I just heard it my model log Oh my god, you went to therapy? Like, I mean, okay, I appreciate that. I didn't know. I didn't know.

Oh, why would you know? It truly is like a thing on these shows. Like, people just want to see that other people experience pain. So Kelly is like saying that she just wants to bond with Kristen and get to know her better. And she just wants Kristen to say, it life sucked and she went through a hard time. You know what? Okay, you know what?

I'm listening to Kristen. And here's what she's saying. What she said was, I'm strong. I know who I am. I know my husband loves me. I believe in our relationship. And I know I know about this bullshit. And you know what?

I don't care. Because I know what I have. And I'm not gonna lose it. Okay. And they're like yeah, my name is Beatrice I heard it loud Now I this is what Kristen said now could someone tell me who's Kristen So she goes you know what I know what it's like when someone's straights, okay?

You're not just gonna walk away. You're gonna try to work it out. And they're like, yeah, so they all get like what it's like being with pieces of shit, man. So they cheers her for still being with her man, even though they are left. And so now they decide to do some more awkward dance scenes and just start getting up on the chairs and dancing. And that room on the second floor, we're at the hottest place where they know to dance on chairs, okay?

And that's what everybody's gonna do, okay? I hope that my friend gives me about 2018 rules to take home with me. Well, yeah, because Song is up to the side, dripping yourself on Jordan the waiter, like, oh God, they're so uptight, aren't they? You know who's not uptight? Me, I know it's the opposite of uptight. Luce.

You get what I'm saying. He's like, oh, God, gross. So they're uptight. I'm down loose. Got it. So now they are dancing. It's like the third time so far. They've been like, guys, let's dance.

So they're dancing and dancing and dancing. And then most of them leave to go home, but Luana Ramona stay. They're going to pick up some guys at the petite plush. And then housewives after dogs. Durin did, Durin is in the pool giggling. And she's parting with Kristen, right? Or did Kristen go to bed?

I just have to. No, no, Kelly went to bed, but the rest of them go out there and they're all like, Kristen's topless, but the rest of them go out there and they're all like Kristen's top list, Sonia's naked, Dorenda is like, she's closed, but she's like in her like bra or whatever. They're all frolic and giggle. Brody brings us to the end of the real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip Real Housewives of New York leg, haze. So funny, I can't wait for the next episode. We'll have another one or two episodes.

We'll be coming down the pike, but can't wait, can't wait, we'll catch up on this show. And I hope everyone's having a wonderful break for people who are listening to this on their break or if they're on break. And I hope everyone has a happy, happy new year year and we're gonna catch you on the next episode Everyone, okay? Bye!

Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors Ain't no thing like Allison King Hacley Savoni, she don't take no baloney Strong the park with Caitlin Clark. She's not just a Sheila. She's a Daniela itch old Aaron McNickolas. She don't miss no trickleess. She's never scary. It's the green fairy Jamie. She has no last name Me Havan Aguila Weber Know your worth with Jason Kerr. She's the wind beneath our Jennifer Wings Sit some scotch with Jessica Tratch. She's always supplying, it's Kelly Ryan.

Kristen the Piston Anderson. Let's give a Kissarino to Lisa Lino. Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the Berg. The Bay Area Betches, Betches. And our super premium sponsors. Somebody get us 10 C's of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neil.

Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides. Nobody holds a candle. It's a Jamie Kendall. She's not harsh. She's Jill Hirsch. She's a little bit loony. Juni. My favorite Merto. Karen McMurto. We love him madly. It's Kyle Podd Chadly.

Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. We wanna hang with Liz Lang. The incredible edible Matthew sisters. Give him hell, Miss Noel. She's the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke. Shannon, out of a cannon Anthony. Let's take off with Tamela Plane. She's quite the catch, it's Victoria Couchett.

She ain't no shrinking Violet Coo-Tar! We love you guys! and Apple podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at onedry.com slash survey.