Watch What Crappens - #2303 RHOBH: Spain in the Butt

Episode Date: January 25, 2024

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (S13E13) cast trip gets under way as the ladies head to Spain where they encounter a sexy chef, some small ghosts, and Annemarie’s questionable apology tour.  It’s enough to make you hop out of a van and puke on the side of the road.  To watch the video version of this recap and for our bonus episodes, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. And grab tickets for the 2024 Golden Crappies Awards Feb 27 at watchwhatcrappens.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondery's new podcast, Dis and Tell, wades into the glorious mess of celebrity beef. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud and asks, what does our obsession with these feuds say about us? Follow Dis and Tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. Hello and welcome to watchra crappins a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about I'm Ben Mandelker and I'm just going to temporarily pull over this vans that way Ronnie can get a breath of fresh air. Hi Ronnie how are you guys look at my veins look at my veins. Should I call 911? How's it going? It's Ronnie Karam. Hi, man. Well, how are you?

I would like to take a moment and say, Ben, happy anniversary. This is our 12 year anniversary on a lot of our practice. Isn't that crazy? And I know because I opened Facebook, and yes, I still have Facebook because I'm an old bitch, so everybody just back the fuck off. Okay. I like it. But, well, I don't really like it. I just have it still. Anyway,

at the point is I opened Facebook and there was a memory from seven years ago and it said, this is our five year anniversary. And it was an episode that we did with Lisa Rinna to celebrate our five year anniversary. And that was seven years ago. That is nuts. I can't believe we're 12. I know. Isn't that wild? We're a year away from our crap and bar mitzvah. Maybe next year that'll be the theme for the crappies bar mitzvah. Um, do you want to know who else is celebrating a birthday today? January 25th,

Ariana DeBose. Um, uh, also Alicia Keys. So I will well off tune. I heard her sing that on some live show. And I was like, literally, because it sounds like someone's pinching you really hard. I shouldn't say that on your birthday though. Love you, Alicia. like someone's pinching you really hard. I shouldn't say that on your birthday though. Love you, Alicia.

There's actually not a huge amount of like really big, exciting ones. I'm like looking, I'm scrolling as quickly as possible. Steven Chomsky, I guess. Well, you know what is weird is, do you know who I share a birthday with? August 25th, Leonard Bernstein. Wow. And he wrote West Side Story with Ariana DeBose.

So I'm having a West Side Story kind of a day. Wait a second, Ronnie, something major just happened. How is one of the sitcom actresses, the random sitcom actresses that I frequently mentioned very close. Markey Post. No, go back to the Park Overall space. Park Overall? Oh God, what are the girls on that show?

Empty nest, an empty nest person. Yes. I forget their names right now. Dynamanoff. Her birthday is today. Our podcast is the same day as Dynamanoff's birthday. How did it take us 12 years to discover that? That is like literally.

That's amazing. Okay, follow her right now. Follow her right now. That'll be her present. I'm sure she's got to now. That'll be her present. I'm sure she's got to be thrilled. That's her present. Later, we'll post it.

Happy birthday. We give you us and everybody who's listening to this, um, do a story or something and tag Dinah Manoff and say, Oh my God, happy birthday. You're the same birthday as watch it. Crap. And let's see how annoyed we can get. If she's, she's still with us, right? She is. By the way, it's also at a James's birthday. So're the same birthday as watch it. Crappens. Let's see how annoyed we can get. She's, she's still with us right now. And I'm like, it's also at a James's birthday. So there's that.

I love her. Okay. We need to stop this and get on with the show, but at a James, I think, well, no offense, cause what if dynamic man off listens after everybody stalks her and I'm like, at a James's matter. Sorry, but oh my God. I sang one of your songs at my sister's wedding. She's the worst now. So I blame you.

Okay. Let's get on to the announcement. So Watch What Crappens, the Golden Crappy Awards are coming up, which I guess would be our 12th Crappy Awards, right? We've got one. We've got one. It's the first year, so the 12th annual Watch What Crappens, Golden Crappy Awards,

live in Los Angeles, February 17th at the Palace Theater. Get your tickets at watchwhatotcrapins.com. There's ticket links. You can also vote for the pre-limbs. We've got a ton of people. You can vote more than once because the people who get the most votes move to the next level. So go vote.

The link is at watchwotcrapins.com or follow us on Instagram. You can find all the links there. Also, we will have a live streaming ticket this year for the Grammy. So those of you who can't make it to L for the Grammys, for the Crappies, I'm driving my head, really.

For Dynamans birthday party, you can stream it here. Special guest, Dynaman off, all right. We're putting it out there. Literally every chat we're to come to the Crappies. By the way, it's important to vote. Just look at what happened to Greta Gerwig and Margot Robbie. Okay? You need to vote. Otherwise, your favorites could get snubbed.

Okay, everyone? So go to watchwackrappies.com and vote. Otherwise, you never know. You never know who might sneak in there. Yeah. So go do that. We're super excited. And that's so quickly, not prepared at all. Gonna spend the weekend doing crappies stuff, musical stuff, trying to figure out some dramatic things.

Dramat, we need the drama. But we're working on it. We're so excited to be there. And this is a video. So we are on Crappin's On Demand. Hi, go listen to videos. Go listen to our Southern Hospitality bonus episode. That is also a video and an audio episode this week on Patreon. Um, because, you know, it's the lowest cost show on Bravo, so we make it the most expensive on crack.

That's how we roll. Ding! We pass on the reverse savings to no one. So, um, yeah, but by the way, that was a really funny recap, so everyone really should listen to no one. So, yeah, but by the way, that was a really funny recap, so everyone really should listen to that one. So, let's move on. Today, we are at the Beverly Hills cast trip in Spain.

So the episode opens up with people packing. It's the classic Real Housewives or People on Bravo packing, which is basically people holding up dresses and tops and hats to their assistants or their children or their pets and asking them what they think about it. So we start that off with Garcelle who is just like, how many suitcases do I need? I can't believe I'm traveling with glam. It's insane insane it just seems excessive I'm alone speaking to a my dead goldfish but not sad about it that's for sure desperate then we go over to Dereet who's with PK but she's not with PK physically is she alone don't turn so

today's episode is a study on loneliness. What is loneliness? Are you loneliness? Are you lonely just because you're not with somebody? Or can you still be lonely when you're with somebody? Let's take a moment, guys. Let's take a moment. Doreed's with Jagger and FaceTimingPK,

who's shirtless in bed. They might just put in a request as a lonely, depressed person. That's not depressed because they're alone, but just because it's something I guess you're born with. Put on your clothes, PK. I don't come on here and do this podcast shirtless. And I'm on the same scale of pasty as you.

Put on a fucking. Okay. But I'm not sure. From one pasty bitch to another. You know, the thing that's been hot for the past few months is this thing about like how often do you think about the Roman Empire? So apparently for, for PK, it's quite a bit because he was wearing that sheet like a toga.

It was sort of like wrapped up like, like one shoulder was out, but the other sheet was sort of doing it over the shoulder look. I was like, you're doing some Caesar cosplay, aren't you in London? Yeah. One time, Brandy Howard called me, you know, from Julie and Brandy. She called me. And it was late, but I was like, oh my god, is someone dead? Because, you know, normally we just see each other in person. And so I was like, oh my god, I have to answer. So I answered and I was shirtless, but I was had my arms kind of over the pillow because, you know, I'm not a monster. So I was answering like that. And also like only fans, like people got a paper this.

Like a trapper keeper. Yeah. So I had like my arms over a pillow, like Lucy in the peanuts, like giving advice over her little thing. So I was doing that. And she's still to this day is like, remember that time I called you and you woke up and you're like fucking naked, probably jerking off while we were talking.

So I think I'm just triggered whenever I see PK do it, but stop Yeah, it just was it was alarming to see that amount of skin on PK. I'm so early in the episode, you know So Dorit's like she's like hi, Bob. Oh, you're in bed. This is you should have warned me Could you put a filter? Could you make your, your, your bare skin looked like a puppy dog with a tongue sticking out? Thank you so much. It's a little hard for me to look at. Checker, can you bring those shoes over for mommy?

Just a spoonful of sugar, have some of this in contention. So he runs off to get shoes for her. And she's like, thank you. Be careful with those, honey. These are collectorsector's items. Hi, baby, what's going on? Oh, Baba, how are you feeling? Are you tired?

I can see the Pringle, a half can of Pringles has been left un-eaten. You must be exhausted. Beebee, Beebee, are you sleeping on London time? You have to get on London time, Bibi. Bibi! You know what, unfortunately, I'm not on London time. I'll tell you what city whose time I am on.

Ladies and gentlemen, Berlin. Take my breath away. Sorry, she's exhausted. She's on London time, actually. We got our bands mixed up. We've dragged Berlin out of bed, darling. So Jack was like, go back to sleep. If you wanna get on London time, go back to sleep.

And Drew's like, no, no, absolutely not. Gee, if you want to get to London time, you have to wake up and you have to stay up. So then Crystal is packing with Lucy. This is the kind of lonely I like. Really rich. You're always having to film with the help because nobody around in your life,

but you're just so rich, you don't have to care, and they're paid enough to be nice to you. That's the kind of company I want. I hope that one day I just so rich. You don't have to care and they're paid enough to be nice to you. That's the kind of company I want. You know, I hope that one day I'm that rich. Also, I hope that next season, Lucy is on the traders. I think she'd be great. What if she has been this whole time? Yeah.

Because, you know, she probably had so many resentments about Crystal. So she probably what if she's been like a trader in this house the whole time and like Crystal just goes disappearing, but then Lucy ends up with a coconut water business. Here's a great idea for next season of the traders. Half of the cast are employers, half the cast are employees. So you have all like housewives or whatever, and then you have assistants and glam. And then we can really get to the bottom. We can really get to some interesting relationships.

Yes, yes, ring class into it. I love it. Yeah, absurd. So then Crystal is joking about doing flamenco, and Lucy's like cracking up and they're making wacky flamenco dance things. And then we go over to Seton packing with Avi, and he's willing to go around on a suitcase

in her room or whatever. And she's like, oh my god, we have a million things to do. Okay. I've got to pack my dead friend. Let's get that done. Yeah, she's gonna pack her good friend. She's gonna, well, she's gonna bring, she's bringing glam. She's like, Hey, Avi, don't be upset. I'm gonna bring glam. He's like, I understand you have to look good and borrow something. And she goes, but I'm also bringing. Mars. And he's like, Mars.

And we find out she's not bringing another person, but that she used to work for Mars Cunningham, who is like a pioneer of modern dance. And, um, she's going to bring his ashes. Yeah. So, um, she's like, you want to go get him? Go get Mars. And he's like me and by the way, so she's like, you wanna go get him? Go get Merse. And he's like, me, by the way, I have to do that. She goes, because we have to pack him.

What are we gonna put him in? Should we put him in this moisturizer tub? She's like, uh. So like, that feels like it's not gonna be secure. And he's like, well, she's like, well, let's fit. He's like, um, well, if we dump the ashes in there, we'll find out. And she's like, but then how do we know if it's going to fit in there? Maybe I put the Ziploc bag in a pretty thing.

Like, I don't know, is there like a shoebox around or like an old M&M bag? We can shove the Ziploc into something respectful, you know? I mean, it's all fun and games, but you are flying commercial. And I wouldn't suggest like taking a random container and putting white powder in it. Okay. Because you're going to get in trouble. Trust me. Trust me on that one. And also when I die and someone's taking around my ashes, because I will, I want the most traumatic, not death, but I want the most traumatic disposal of my body ever, which I think is that one, right? Is getting, what do you call it? I just called it that, my ashes.

What do you call your ashes? Creamated? Creamated, yeah. I want to be cremated. I want to be cooked and smushed. So when you guys are taking or whoever it is, probably, well Ben won't do it, probably Dom. I'll leave Dom a note. Ask me. What, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna carry your ashes. No, you'll be like, what would he, what do you do for me? You know, so your ashes, I will happily carry your ashes. No, thanks.

And then when you're going to carry my ashes, I'd be like, oh my God, these ashes, they look so good. Finally, Ronnie got his poruses tied as he wanted them. They're literally finer than sand. So when you're carrying my ashes and you say, Ronnie, where do you want me to spread you? I just want you to hear my voice going. Now you're trying to be nice to me.

You just put me in an oven and fucking crushed me to death as you started me on fire. Fuck off. Let me just think of a romantic. You might as well throw me down the fucking garbage disposal at that point. I mean, you just literally crushed me in an oven, sir. And to that note, happy birthday again, Alicia Keys.

This corpse is on fire! You see it started with fire and it shall end on fire. Wait, so you want to be cremated just so that way you can, after you're done being cremated, turn around and be like, fuckers burn me. Yeah It's a trap Like I find just burn me just burn me. Wow. You really burned me. Wow. Wow. Yeah, let's say no We're not gonna burn you I mean if you die first and I bury you because I'm sure you'll want to be buried right well

I'm Jewish so I don't think we're actually supposed to be cremated Wow Well, I'm Jewish, so I don't think we're actually supposed to be cremated. Wow. Well, OK, I'll bury you nicely. And then I'll guilt trip you for like taking up part of the Earth. I'll be like, wow, Ben, going to just decide to take up a piece of this earth forever. Huh. Well, the trick is on you. This there's no overpopulation or anything. Ben, Jesus. The joke's on you because we Jewish people already have started the guilt trip

because we're supposed to be buried in modest coffins just like a simple pine box so like as we are getting buried we're actually saying don't mind me I'll just take the pine box don't mind me don't know no worries you know all I I'm just dead don't worry I don't need anything fancy. Just No bells and whistles. No bells and whistles. So wrong you get me a nice coffin. That's fine. You know what? You keep the nice coffin. I'll just take the bad one. I'll take the bad one. That's fine. You know what? It's how you treat it in me real life. Fine. Just fine.

So Sutton tells this story about how she worked for Merce and she's like, I was in my 20s back in the 90s in New York City and Merce was one of the best in the dance world and he was respected and he really liked me with the way I watered plants at least. I go, oh, that's sweet. I love seeing this independent film at Sundance, Sutton and Merse. I can't wait till my TaskRabbit guy is worrying about where to take my ashes. Sorry, I don't know why I'm being so mean today. That's just the mood I'm in. I'm gonna get the anniversary and it's put me in a mood of being dead and being mean to people who are dead. Very sorry. Yeah. That's my apology. So they are going to pack Merse and you know, son wants to spread his ashes in a significant place with people

who are probably not that significant in her life. So yeah, they're gonna do that. So now everyone's going to LAX and everyone's showing up. Amory has like, she has a lot of suitcases, I think about 8.5 of them and they're just coming down the sidewalk and everyone's like, oh my God, that's a lot of luggage, which is funny because this is the cast

that always brings, you know, like literally like a circus, a circus like trucks amounts worth like giant elephants and tigers and Pajaminas coming by in huge crates. Yeah. So Crystal's really excited to have a great restart for everybody on the trip to Spain. There's nothing a sangria or five can't fix. So Erica's like, well, everybody seems to be stopping on a good note.

Nobody's killing anybody at the airport. Hold on, watch this. Do what I learned, guys. You don't even need a key in that one. You just go straight for Turkey about to get slaughtered. All right. Crystal, what do you do it over there by baggage claim? My veins, my veins.

So they get on the plane, they go to the plane. And they're in first class, so Dari put on PJs that are $1,217, which is kind of an odd amount, right? 1200. Very price is right. Yeah. And she hasn't paid for them. Oh, by the way, we don't find that out. It's just something I know deep in my heart and I cannot wait to see.

I've said, I said this the first time PK and Dari came on the show and I'm going to say it the last day that they're on. I cannot wait to see them get arrested. One or both because they're shady and I don't believe that they even paid for these PJs or that they're real. I think they're probably knockoffs and they're still fake. I think they're knockoffs and they're still not paid for. That's what I think.

I think so in my mind I'm like who changes into PJs when you're flying. And then I realized, oh, this is so that way, Jareet can later say, oh yes. Oh, when I flew to Spain, I was in a PJ. Yeah, I was in PJs. Yeah, it was wonderful. It was a wonderful flight. Yeah.

I took the PJ to Spain. Yeah. PJs for PJs. Yes, we have a Chanel PJ. It's one of a kind. Mm-hmm. So then I'm saying so again remember yesterday when I was gonna stop saying so before every sentence, but then I couldn't do it Well still can't apparently it's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial Being an actual royal is never about finding your happy ending, but the worst part is,

if they step out of line or fall in love with the wrong person, it changes the course of history. I'm Aresha Skidmore-Williams. And I'm Brooke Sifron. We've been telling the stories of the rich and famous on the hit-wondery show Even the Rich, and talking about the latest celebrity news on Rich and Daily. We're going all over the world on our new show, Even the Rich. And talking about the latest celebrity news on Rich and Daily, we're going all over the world on our new show Even the Royals.

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You can listen to even the royals early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus. Crystal is joking that that pajama outfit is worth more than any of this is worth more than her wedding dress But I don't even know how to speak without saying that word nothing will come out To be fair, Crystal's wedding dress was just a simulacation from Party City So Crystal is also wearing she's like well, what did need? They were just lifting me up above the crowd, singing the circle of life. Ha-ma-na-na-na-na, ha-ma-na-na-na-na. Ha-ma-na-na-na-na-na-na. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr one of that with her turkey in that version because they needed to have a turkey in the lion king. The other thing. So yeah. So so I mean Dorita's wearing $1,200. This is so a $1,200 pajama set, which is it's unnecessary to change into pajamas on an airplane. First and foremost,

I think we all agree. And second of all, she's only changing the pajamas. That way she can wear her show off her expensive pajamas on camera. I appreciate Crystal who's wearing $7 pajamas. Although I guess she also still even at $7, I still don't think you have to change it to pajamas, but it was a funny disparity. But just wear your pajamas. That's what I do.

Just wear what you, you know. Just wear something from Kyle by Shahidi. I mean, it's basically pajamas. Kyle by Shahidi. Is that our name? Shahidi. Kyle by. Kyle by Dinamanov.

Shahida. I think Shahida maybe. I don't want to get the point. I think it's Shahida. It's not nice. Wow. By Shahida. Yeah.

Shahida. Kyle by Shahida. Yeah. Shahida. Carb by Shahida too. So let's see here. Sutton wants to play a little gang guys. Cause they get to Spain. Okay. They get to Spain.

Yeah. And they get on their Mercedes bus or whatever. And she tells us about the house. It's from stage. I think is that a prerogative? I always thought it was siege, but I, this is because it took me this show to realize it's actually sit, sit, sit. I actually don't remember how to say it properly. So I'm just going to make a fool of myself on our 12 year anniversary and just say, sit

a J sit, J sit, sit, J. One of the first places that the Merce Cunningham Dance Company performed in Europe. How amazing is that? How amazing is that? I want to take a coffee just like Merce would have asked me for. He would have said, hey, you over there with a scarf on your head. I see you. Get me a coffee. Oh, God, look at that tree. That reminds me of when I was watering his thigh because he threw a shoe at me and said, faster, bitch, got the memories we share.

Sutton is Sutton brings up a game because it's a real housewise. And that's what you do. You play little games because why would you be expected to make conversation with each other and your eight adults who've known each other for a long time. I'm sure I like, like most people who are watching this, who watch Bravo, we all released a collective groan at the let's play game. But luckily this was actually kind of a funny game because it was, it was an extremely self-involved game. The game was called all of a suddenden and it's All About Sudden

and it was just questions about sudden and just sudden trivia. And I was like, well, you know what? This is the sort of game I can get behind. Yeah, because it's not trying to be something else. When other people do it, it's a roundabout way to get them to talk about you. You know what I mean? They'll say, like, okay, today's game is, um, what is the cheat gift? Why does everybody talk about me all the time?

Why is everybody trying to take my picture right now and like make it seem like I'm a lesbian with Morgan Wayne? Oh, why? Or the games come from the Lisa Rinna school of like, let's just be like fabulous and hilarious. People, let's show America how fabulous and wacky we are. What was the last place you hung upside down and an opossum licked your vagina?

You're like, whoa, whoa. Okay. That was crystal in the woods. Okay. Now, when was the last time Lisa, Lisa Vanderpump leaked that to pay to sex right now? She did it. Lisa Vanderpump leaked that to PageSex right now. Right now. She did it.

So the winner of the at least her in it, that's a that's a rough one. I forgot how like crazy that terrible impersonation is. I literally just got a head brush. So much can change in seven years, can't it? Actually, really, the people have taken on the torch for Lisa's terrible games is really like Aaron on Rony these days. Guys, let's play a game. When was the last time your hot husband banged

doing an elevator? I'll start today. Okay, now you guys talk. Okay, so the game is Sutton. So they're talking about Sutton and there's different questions and there's a prize for this. And Garcelle says, Is it a Birken? No, it's a good prize. This game all of a sudden is gonna have really good prize, everybody. So let's do it. Name one of my cats. One of her cats is named Prince. I forgot that and not Prince like Princess, but Prince as in

get Not the real art, but a print of the art. Yeah. So Erica remembers that. I was sad that I didn't remember that because I love her cat. And then what was my first job in New York City and because oh, I know, I know, I know. Box of stars. No, not Starbucks. Erica's like Barista and Kyle goes, Huh stripper, huh. No, that's Erica. Huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh. That's right, guess what?

Nothing's changed, yeah. And you, you made a lot more money than I did as a nanny, because that was my first job. Okay, she was working at a bridal shop in Flushing Queens when a boyfriend kicked her out. One of those crushing scenes. What was she to do? What was she to say? She was out on her fanny and then over the bridge to something to the Sheffields door. Oh my God, I've forgotten the lyrics. Never the bridge to flushing and the She nanny on demand. Well, goodbye. Listen, as long as you don't forget the lyrics to Empty Nests on, you know, whose birthday.

Life goes on, but so do we. Just how we do it is no mystery. That's it. Don't kiss Dinah Manoff's ass. She's already quit listening to this episode after I said Edda James was better than her. So she's gone. The dynamic man off dream is dead. Okay, let it go. What's that? Try again next year. When Sally Struthers, is she coming up?

How could you forget I was a nanny? Sally Struthers has played by Jen Shaw. That, no, that is if inception were about that, then I'm on board. I'm such a different inception sequel. Sally Struthers as played by Jen Shaw. What about me? What about this star from Charlton, Africa? What about me?

What is my father's name? Mr. So. I know your father's name. It's John. That's actually correct. His name is all of my first customers over the strip club. His name is John T. But I'll take John. I like wow, you are very exacting. So, and then she turns to Garcelle and goes, Garcelle, you are very disappointing. She's like, oh, I'm not even trying, okay? All right, well, what is the name of my middle child? And Kyle's like, vodka, ha, no, but, esophagus, Philip. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, She V and Erica says it's the F 150 for fuck's sake people. I do believe that Erica is the winner

Erica congratulations. That is a review you will never get from the stage In the words of that will never be spoken at the Oscars the Grammys the Tonys or the Grammys, the Tonys, or the Espeys, or the American Comedy Awards. Erica is the winner. Don't worry, Erica. There's a shakers award out there somewhere for you.

I believe in you. But you get a tiara. Congratulations. So, she gets a tiara and a gar Garce sells like, is it from Del J? And she's like, no, it's from Set and Store. Okay, you're gonna wear it, you're gonna like it. So then we go to the villa and we meet Zoe. Who's the air-brain buddy?

Go, she's so cool. Welcome to the air-brain buddy. Everyone's gonna love it. Welcome ladies. Welcome to the via Catalina. Can I show you the villa? And so they walk in and Erica's like, hey Kyle, here's your shell of temple. And Kyle's like, oh yeah, that's my non-alcoholic, I'm not drinking anymore because I'm going

through such pains with my marriage. Want to know about anyone? Oh my God, that lady who's offering me the Shirley Temple. I mean, was she suggesting that I like girls? Because I don't know where she got that impression. It's a drink, Kyle. Okay. I just want to make sure she's not giving me anything alcoholic because I wouldn't want

to think anyone was cheating on my drinking plan. That lady just offered that lady to take my picture from behind the plant. Why? Why? How are you tattooing the K on to that lady? Ladies, would you guys like me to show you a tour of the house? Yes, I will go on tour with you. Oh my god, why does everybody think I'm in love with that lady? Well, unfortunately, I can't go on tour with you because I'm already booked

to play a mermaid in Peter Pan, where I will be singing. My heart will go on while a cream pie goes into my face. Take me sort of sense. So maybe I can get some tips from you on what to do in that role, maid. Um, actually, I'm not a maid. I'm just showing you the Airbnb, so please follow me. Yes, um, sorry about that, but I'm afraid, uh, this is not really my Remus Specialties, Airbnb is my Remus Specialty, but mermaids are not actual maids, they're just... M-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m- see that's all. Okay, let's look at the house. Alright, welcome to Via Cacaduna. It was built in the 14th century, over 700 years old.

America's like, oh, jeez, we got Jesus times up in here. Good God. Tom was born BC. Yes, yes. This was built by one of the most famous wine producing companies in Spain. And while it's been fully restored and modern, we've decided to keep some very, very old, justy wine bottles. Just to remember that this was built a long time ago. So enjoy. Yeah. I need plumbing and electricity. So enough. Okay.

I'll go see a cave on my spare time. As long as there's like a hot dog shop or something in there, I'll go, I'll go to the museum version of the cave and there's a gift shop or something But I don't want to be staying in a place of the cave from Jesus times So Erica's like is this place haunted well, it's not haunted but we do every now and then here the voice of a spectral voice throughout the hallways that goes get it, hit, hit, hit, hit. They should be so lucky to be haunted by Vanderpump.

No, she announces that they're haunted by little people, which is so, I just love the idea of like a real pearlman ghost in there. Just like the ghost is just just making smart ass comments to Shelley Long the whole time. It's just Wesley from Mr. Belvedere just locked in at his age when he was on Mr. Belvedere walking around. She's random, smaller people from television that we've loved over the years. Just like the best of the best of toddlers and T.R. is wondering through there. It's just child actors of the 80s.

Oh, it's Brian, Brian, the kid from Family Ties. You can't you can't do that. The Webster don't make Webster hang out with Brian. Well, you know, the kid, the baby that came along midway through that show. No, nobody remembers that kid. We're about to hear yours. It's like teeny others. Oh, rest in peace.

Tina, others past, right? No, she's very much alive. I'm maybe her career, but I do like the idea that like, guys, I woke up last night and I could have sworn Tina yetethers was at my bedside. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Let's not pass. She did pass.

No, no, what she did not pass. No, Tina Yethers passed. I knew she did. You're so disrespectful. She did not pass. As an American actress when we see age 50. The manual is alive, I want to say, by the way. It says years active 1981 to 2013.

What does that mean Wikipedia? Career. Oh, sorry. She is alive. She's 50 years young. And with any luck, she will be a presenter at the crappies. Let's just sit on stars from the 80s and see if they'll come. We can make it happen.

Okay. Next up, um, they're all freaking out, you know, cause it's a real housewife show. So I'm a guy that's haunted or any of them rich with them. You say I'm in a position of waiting for them to die. So if they're already dead and rich, I'm in a position of waiting for him to die. So if they're already dead, Marius, I'm in. All right. Um, so, uh, then suddenly last, but then Doritos, I'm like, whoa!

And then she like grabs, you know, Erica's hand, like, I've got PTSD from ghosts. So she goes, what the heck? Who the heck says that? Haunted, a haunted house by Tina Yellers. And Anne-Marie says, huh, well, we all know who's the first to go in a horror movie, me and Garcell's leg.

Between me and Anne-Marie, I hope it's her. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. And then we find out one of Erica's talents is that she can smell spirits. Yeah. Ha, ha, ha. Otherwise known as Sutton walking through a door. Oh.

Ha, ha, ha. Um, okay, next up, they are looking at rooms and, wait, are we? I get it, Ronnie, I get your joke. I get your joke. Ooh. Ooh. Sutton, they're all very confused. and wait I get it Ronnie I get your joke I get your joke So they're all very confused like what is the little people thing are they are those aliens and are they ghosts? What are they? No idea what those little fuckers are but if they fuck with me off probably fucking listen

Single why not ready to mingle on my right? Listen, I'm single why not ready to mingle on my ride bill? I think ourselves like I mean They would be little and really pale and have hair sticking out and their eyes are big and they're coming for me and saying Garce Garcel I'm not lonely everyone. I'm not lonely. I just think about these things when I'm alone and I have emotional responses But I'm not lonely, I'm not lonely. I just think about these things when I'm alone and I have emotional responses, but I'm not lonely. Well, we just wanna make sure, we assure your ladies are tired from their journey. Please have these drinks.

Get the fuck away from me with those drinks right after telling me all the, everybody who comes here dies and just stays forever. Hey, what is this, the Hotel California? I'm gonna fuck outta here. They get trapped in one of the ancient wine casks that's downstairs. So it's like get out, but it's like get lit. Does that make sense? I feel like that was gonna be a good joke, but I don't think it was. So they all are down there. They're like in situate and

everything. Still talking about the ghosts. And then they see like there's like an attic door. They're like walking around. There's like a, what do you know, those like ceiling door things. And Erica starts pushing it and he's like, no, no, gee, don't do that. You never know what sorts of, you never know what PK is hiding.

Have you ever seen them fall through a ceiling I have? It's very scary. Well, I'll tell you this, I don't leave ghosts and little people in my life. I'm on medication. I'm trying very hard to remain stable. Trying to feel something. Nope, still not feeling it.

OK, let's just move on. Who's get the master? So now there's like a Thanksgiving Day parade of glam squads walking into this house. Like they, there's literally, I'm surprised we don't see like a, like a float of Mikey that they're having holding the strings or he's like floating in like, there are so many people with these glam squads. It's out of control. Uh, yeah.

There's like three of them. I mean, it is like a little squad. Garcelle has one now and she's like, Oh, I mean, this is excessive. I never traveled with one until I met these bitches. You got to keep up with them. Am I right? Oh, oh, oh. Would it have been possible that all this time when Zoe is talking about this

place is haunted by little people, she just met glam squads. Like these are just ghosts coming in like, here come the ghosts. The glam squads are the offerings that they make to the little people. She just met glam squads. I think it's just ghosts coming in. Like, here come the ghosts. The glam squads are the offerings that they make to the little people. I haven't seen Midsummer, but is that like the plot of Midsummer? Spoiler alert. Basically, they tell these glam squads, like, come to my family's farm and then the glam squads go and then they never return again. But all the ghosts look really hot from that point on. That makes sense to me. So everyone's showing up and so then and then so Dorit's glam squad lady, like they're hanging up all their clothing and then Dorit's

like they're hanging up all their clothing and then Derit's hurac in the closet collapses. So now they all think that it was the ghost that collapsed the closet. It's the ghost of Canal Street knockoffs trying to get its shit back, okay? It's the ghost of creditors. Oh, Diosmios! I can't believe that he pinged.

I'm a woman of the world. Maclosos fell on the floor rows. Come on people, get it together. Don't you speak a spaniel. Kyle's like, oh my god, I don't think I packed properly for this place. So Doree comes in and she just starts shading Kyle for all her choices, which I feel like I've been waiting many years for this to finally happen. She's like coil G. Oh my god

What the hell is this pleather with rhinestones? Is this dental floss? You've been hanging around lesbians, haven't you? Well, I'm sorry. I'm not like dressing like a widow from the 50s like you So then we get an image of Doree wearing her black suit with her purple fur collar. I mean, that is a pretty good description of how Doree dresses. So she says, Kyle, this is so much leather you brought, Kyle. Why would you do this? Who's dressing you? Jesus.

Just stop and rob Melissa Ittridge on the way over here. Melissa leaving closet door open and in scene her. Who designed this piece, Katie Bland? Ha ha ha ha ha. So Kyle is like, well you know I never know what I'm gonna be in the mood for so I just have a variety of things and they're all shit Kyle, they're all shit. You need to start hanging out with me again. Kyle, this is terrible.

Who made this kitty clang, clang, clang of the trolley? Do lesbians like that musical? I'm getting my references mixed. So, um, so Dorit's like, don't, because he calls us well leather leggings are my go-to. She was not in Spain or the rest of the planet. Please. Coil, who are you?

Who is this new person? That is a veeted coil. I don't know this coil. Yes, she's got an amazing body and she wants to show it off. I get it, but what are you thinking? What are you thinking when you pack like this? What is she looking for? A guitar? It's not hair products, I'll tell you that much.

Kyle, these are all disgusting and I'm being generous when I say that or should I say degenerous? So Kyle's like, she's like, okay, well, okay. I've got to put all of everything away myself set up glam squads Honey, maybe some of the things you need to put away away Like away like in the cabbage can for your marriages. Oh Have got anniversary. Do we try to take pictures of me right now? First night at dinner. Okay. So they get the chef storm who is cute and they all start falling all over themselves when they see the chef. He's cute. Yeah. I hope they all enjoy his terrible food because unfortunately you cannot

be that cute and be a good chef. That is just the way it goes. They can all try to convince us later that this is some of the best burjudo they've ever the way it goes. They can all try to convince us later that this is some of the best brujudo they've ever had in their life, but we all know it just came from a Costco tray because he can pull it off. He can get away with it because they just are like, storm, yes, chef, storm, whatever you say, storm.

Sutton and Crystal come first and there's a guitar playing and a woman singing. Okay, here's the thing. I need a band. I can't just have one person singing because then I feel so awkward if I'm not really nice to them and pay attention to them. I feel like if there's a band, you don't have to pay attention because they have each other. You know, they can be like, hey, bro, that was really good.

Love that lick. Love that lick in the second part. But if it's just one person, like she has nobody to be like just like the guy on the guitar is paying attention to the guitar. He doesn't have time to compliment her so I have to stand there and be like oh my god I love this. Do you know any more Stevie next anything anything? Oh my god. I wish she was shut up I just wish she was shut up. She's just gonna probably try another fucking Stevie next. She can't do it. Why is she trying? Yeah, it's like that thing When there's like a little bit when there's like two people and they're doing

music and everyone just talking and no one's paying attention. And then the moment they stop, everyone turns around and goes, so good as if we've ever been listening. Um, but the good news is, uh, you were in luck because it wasn't just one person. You know who else was there? Ladies and gentlemen. wasn't just one person. You know who else was there? Ladies and gentlemen. Berlin featuring chef's tomb.

Garcelle is talking. Oh, Garcelle is in her room getting ready. And then Anne-Marie comes over and she's like, wow, this house is fully haunted. I mean, there's doors that look like they shouldn't even be open. I don't play with that shit. Listen, I don't play with Ouija boards. I'm from Haiti. And where I'm from, there's Voodoo. There's Witchcraft.

Growing up, I would hear stores. They went to a funeral and there was an opening casket, and the person turned into a goat. I mean, who needs it? Am I right? Julia from Miami is like, oh, that sounds wonderful. I moved to Haiti. I'm glad you got my gift.

Your cousin's funeral. Guy says, I mean, there are ghosts all over this place. I mean, I just saw the Babadook. Pretty sure that was just Kyle. You know what? You're right. You're right. It must have been Kyle.

It just scared me because in my vision, the Babadook was singing a song about getting banged on the kitchen floor. Yeah, it was Kyle. That was officially Kyle. Kyle's like, it is really scary. I think I just saw Michael Myers. Oh, wait, sorry.

I was just remembering when I was in two Halloween movies recently. Garcelle says, wow, if there's any ghosts in here, please be nice. Okay, let's talk to Henry. So Henry is joking with her. Like hopefully these ghosts will go out of here by the end of the year. So Crystal and Sutton are talking on the patio about how they're the first ones and then talking on the patio about how they're the first ones and then Madrid even comes down before Kyle Kyle is taking forever to change in from one terrible look into another terrible look wow he's really going for these terrible looks Kyle is like what sort of like softcore porn dress should I wear now when I say that I don't mean like it's like if you've ever

seen a softcore porn they always have very strange wardrobe when they, when they are dressed like they always are wearing like odd florals, etc. Like in those drinks, you know, in the moment, in the non-sex scene. Yes. We need something when she's in the office. Oh my God. What do people wear to an office? It's like when the, it's always like the therapist is going through a walk through the woods with their client, which doesn't make any sense. And they're both wearing sundress, but like stringed sun sundress with the poofy shoulders and stuff. Why does Janine have a jacket on her head for this scene?

Oh, sorry. Was it happy? They're like, we don't really understand. We don't understand how to work with clothes and soft core. I brought your file. You're not, you don't pull the how to work with clothes in softcore. I brought your file. You're not, you don't pull the file out of your vagina. Okay. I'm telling you.

Jacket on the shoulders folder in the hands. Jesus Christ. One of my favorite softcore porns I ever saw starred the actual dearly departed Dana Plato. Maybe that's who you were thinking of. And I think so. There was a scene where she was sitting at a table having dinner with another couple. And they have a whole scene where they're talking about dinner,

she's in a sweater, they're all like in this kind of clothing. So she's in a sweater and they have a whole scene where they're talking and then she goes, well, I'm gonna turn in and she stands up and she's wearing no pants and no underwear. So she was just in a sweater with her. With no. It was just her vagina.

She just stands up and serve a giant and a sweater on. I was like, Oh, so you sat through all of dinner like that. They really have a curious way of doing wardrobe in these movies. Yeah. So Kyle's doing that. Um, and, uh, trying on a bunch of different stuff. And then they're all waiting for Kyle, you know, and it's so Kyle wacky. Like, I'd love to shop.

He is crazy. Is there anywhere to shop in here? Lady was just giving us a tour. I love shopping. So she does that for a while. And then the chef's storm comes out and he's like, hello. Welcome to Vera, Vera, Carolina. I'm, I'm, I'm strong.

I'm Chef Storm. Like, oh my God, Chef Storm! Tonight, I'm going to serve you Ritz crackers with some cheddar cheese and some grapes. I found it at the supermarket. Oh yes, feed us Chef Storm. So authentic. Delicious.

And Erica's like, well, a lot of you, eh? And Grissel's like, wow, we can tag team him. He's fucking hot. Let's do it, Erica. Garcelle's like, storm can feel free to rain on me anytime, bring it. I was like, okay, Samantha. It's really hard not saying so. That's why I keep taking pauses.

I keep looking for other words. It's okay, by the way. I'm not obsessing. It's just a fun thing, you know? Can I stop saying so? I can't. And when I think of it and try to think of something else, what are, I need to write a list of other acceptable,

acceptable. You see, I can't even say acceptable now. I'm ruining my entire vocabulary. I need other acceptable small words. Why don't you say, dearie me? Dearie me. Okay. Okay, dearie, I'm gonna write it.

Dearie me. By the way, our linguistics professional commented on our Instagram that backed me up on everything I said, which is that these words are totally acceptable and fine, and they're good for our brain. Good to have our brain. That's okay, it's just a challenge, guys.

It's just a one day challenge. Okay. Two day. One week. One week. Deary me. Garcelle. Deary me.

Erica is still talking about the hot chef. She's like, It's a hot chef here. That's all I care about. Because they go to get their, they go to the dinner table. And Anne Marie says, Well, we need to look and see if he has a ring.

That's fucking crazy. I mean, if he does have a ring, it could mean scoliosis. I'm just saying. That's about a professional. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Or a bottle of vodka. You're not the whole like, huh? I want to ask me about cheating. Huh? Stop asking me about cheating Okay, everyone I would like to introduce y'all To a special friend. Oh my god. What is that? Is that moisturizer? You're bringing it out in front of chef's door? No, it's powder His name is Merce and he's a world-renowned Choreographer he is a real big deal.

Ah, it's real big deal. And Kyle goes, in a little box. Oh, so it's a big deal. Is that why you've kept him in a Ziploc bag for 12 years in your house? Okay. So they're all like horrified that he's in a Ziploc bag. And the son's like, well, I mean,

he came like this in an envelope. And Kyle's like, um, that's a Ziploc. Isn't she crazy? I'm like so grounded and down to earth. I understand things now that I'm friends with Morgan. Hmm. Well, when you get ashes, they come in and it's a Ziploc. It's a Ziploc Ziploc.

It is hilarious. That is a Ziploc. And Gressel says this man meant so much to you and he's in a Ziploc. Yes, that's how they come. That's how we come once they crush us. You think they have special little things to put you in? You just basically said, I don't give a fuck. Throw me in an oven.

They put you in a Ziploc. That's what they did. My papa was in a Ziploc and like a Payless Shoe Box or whatever forever. And then my grandma accidentally sent him to the Goodwill with the rest of her stuff. My memaw sent him. She put him on the pile of goodwill stuff.

This is nothing like trying to hunt down your grandpa and the goodwill. Oh, my God. It was mortified. No. Well, I mean, that's a look. Now that is, I'm sure your papa probably loved having that story, like associated with him, right? That's funny.

Yeah. He's up in heaven. Like, well, they donated me. I'm sure he's not the first one also that that's happened to. Like I- But who else can say that? Like when Goodwill like guilt to you, you know, it's like, oh, you brought us a bunch of unwashed clothes. I also brought you my grandfather, all right?

Be grateful. You meant a lot to me. And they're like in a Ziploc. So, sons like, well, Merce, he's one of the founders of Modern Dance. And Erica's like, along with Martha Graham and Twyla Tharp and Pookie to Pookie. And you couldn't even say that. She just said Twyla with Twyla. Right. Me and Twyla, we're on one, one word name basis. It's all right. We know each other.

Broadway to Broadway, Bill. Broadway to Broadway. And Erica, Erica basically says that like Merce was the legend, but she didn't know about him and that like Mikey, when she asked Mikey like who he is, he's like, how dare you? And I got checked by my own friend. So, so there's that. Erica learned now, does she know about Dianna Manoff?

Okay. Because that's, that's why we don't know about that. That bitch can't dance. She was also in Chicago before we kicked her ass. Everyone said I was better than Dianna. Stupid slut. You know, I'm just going to call it Dianna Manoff. I'm not even going to be on-on-one with Dinah. What an idiot. Kyle's like, I know about Dinah Shore.

So Erica's like... What? Why is everybody acting like it's such a weird that I like golf? Like, what do you mean you wanna get a picture of me saying how much I like golf? Don't send this to the tabloids. Oh my God, did I record this

and you already leaked it to the tabloids by accident? Of course, it just pops from behind a plant and takes a picture. That's all. Hearing me about so I had a bond immediately when I was working in the studio with him. I think he liked me as a dancer and he liked my work ethic. You know, I would cook for him. Uh, he liked also how I watered the plants or brought in his male or swept off his stoop. It is kind of hard to cook some of dinner when you're left on their stoop with

their male till they open the door. But I did it. Thank you, big lighters. His favorite activity was throwing fortune cookies at my head and said, you want to have some fortune? Get out of my face. Then you'll find some fortune here. He would say here, honey, have a cookie that's going to have more fortune than

you're ever going to have. A fortune cookie. He'd read those fortunes. Bensep saying in bed, he said, Sun sucks. You should have a long life, Sun sucks. Those two, it was catchy. And it'll be better than sons. She don't, he don't, she also do that.

So she's saying that he was such a unique person and he, by the way, this guy really is apparently like a huge legend. And so it was actually really cool that she had this relationship with him. And she says that Merce was one of the most important men in her life, probably more so than, you know, even maybe even Mr. Dolce.

So Crystal said, so now Storm brings in his food and everything. He's like, here's some fig nutans. And I found some leaves in the parking lot. So I just sort of rolled them up. You can just sort of touch them. It's like, oh my God, this is the best food I've ever had. This is wonderful. Yeah, I'm all about this.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Culinary greatness right here. So they all love it. And they're making, Eric is like, oh yeah, I just love this. It just bursts in your mouth. Oh, with so much cream. It's just so creamy and bursty.

Holy cow, I'm gonna swallow it. Second I can't. Second I find out it's left its wife is getting swallowed. That's for sure. To read is just like losing her mind. Oh, they crammed fresh. Oh, this is just absolutely b******.

As creamy as a cream pie to the face in the middle of Peter Pan on ice. Oh, I just can't get enough of it. I'm about to lose my mind. Ladies. Yeah. Welcome. Oh, my God.

Choo. What's up? Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha.

Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha forget that. Ha ha ha ha. Ladies. Yeah!

She's cute. Ha ha ha. She's like, it's like she was stabbed. It's like she walked in to look at a Bentley and someone stabbed her in the face. Oh my gosh. Okay, dearie me, what are y'all talking about over there? And Garastell's still making orgasm sounds. And Kyle's like, you know, I feel like when you go to different countries,

you have to like eat what they bring you and like forces you to try different things because like I never want to be a mess. Never, never. It's salmon, Kyle. You literally only make salmon. I know. These are all such like, they're all nice. It's like, it's like salmon with creme fraiche.

It's basic. Yeah, it's all very basic. Would you like a cherry tomato on a toothpick with a little bit of fresh mozzarella balls? This is nuts. It's like insane. Kyle, I love Kyle talking about eating different things. I would normally. I've been eating a lot of different things lately.

Ha ha ha. Come on, don't put that on. Jim Z. So Amar is like, um, I just want to interrupt as long as we're not talking about esophagus is, um, just wanted to say esophagus. Okay. Um, I feel like there's like a bit of an elephant in the room. Guys, my marriage is great.

No, not about that at all. But there's just some stuff I need to get off my chest. Last weekend was a lot. And there's like a lot of things that were said. And like on my part, I can apologize for Sutton. And I, you know, and I talked, Sutton and I, we talked and I hope we're in a better place. And Sutton's like, yeah, you know what, this, you know, the esophagus stuff is fine. My problem was lonely and insecure when you said that.

And then we see a flashback to Anne-Marie saying, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, like, gonna wake up in the morning to my amazing children and my amazing husband and my amazing life and thank God that I'm not lonely and miserable or whatever she said, insecure. So during me, Garcell's like damn. And something goes, wait, who's lonely and insecure? So we cut back and Sutton says, I didn't like that. You have three to four sayings at this table. I was like, maybe four.

I'm sorry, stop starting rumors guys. I think I was more lonely during my marriage because he traveled a lot and when he didn't travel, I made out with girls so that we had tattoos together. So what big deal got off my ass? Why is everybody questioning me right now? Come and finish my store. Anyway, just you shouldn't have used the word lonely.

And I can own that. I can own that, okay? And Garstahl goes, well, lonely affected me too. And she says... I love the Ammerys trying to bring up stuff to guilt everybody else. And they're like, no, no matter how hard you try, even at the beginning of your story, you're the biggest asshole disabled. Okay. And you're terrible at this. You are terrible at this. This is such bad housewives are you just take her off, wheel her out already. Yeah. So Garcelle was offended because it's like, well, if you don't have a man, you're

as lonely and desperate. So Emery says, well, you know, several of us were angry that night. And I said things that I was like not proud of and like I apologize for them okay I'm sorry I called you lonely okay if I said something mean I'm sorry I am sorry okay listen I would much rather be a lonely 10 than a 10 than a 8.5 company. Betrothed. Betrothed. Yeah, I take an 8.5. Fuck off.

So, Emery says, I'm sorry because Emery, Garcell is like, if that's an apology, don't apologize because I'm not accepting it. And so, Emery's still, she's like yelling at everyone her sorry. She's like, well, she's not, I'm sorry, she's actually not yelling at anyone. And that's very important, very important distinction. But she is, she's sort of like, she's not, I'm sorry. She's actually not yelling at anyone. And that's very important, a very important distinction. But she is, she's sort of like, um, she's not being like, I am honestly guys, I'm really sorry. She's like, she's like defensively saying I'm sorry. She says, I'm sorry that affected you.

I'm sorry that I said, Loni, if that affected you, anybody else I may have offended, I apologize for that comment. I was angry. Deal. If you were offended. Deary me, Crystal says, calling me insecure? What was that? And she goes, oh, we're gonna get to you. And then everybody just looks around all uncomfortable.

And she says, okay, well, let's talk about the Crystal situation then. So the first night that Crystal and I met, we were at a mutual friend's house and it was around the holidays. And the first thing that Crystal said to me about this group of women was that you ladies were not intelligent, no one was educated,

and you're all very shallow, shallow and uneducated. So, there. Okay, what is that? So now you're just gonna be, you're gonna add tattletail onto everything else. Like what does that have to do with with anything? I know that being said I fully believe that crystal said this by the way This seems I can totally imagine crystal be like oh my god those girls They are so shallow and they're uneducated in their stupid so gross that goes damn and crystal goes ah

like shallow and uneducated? Um, what? The word that offended Doreen, of course, the most is, Shilu! Me! How could I be shallow? Just like in head to toe, like, don't say it, like, labels, like, literally on every part of her body.

She looks like a mascot for rich people. She's ridiculous. I know. How could you accuse me of being shallow? All I did was wear $1,200 unnecessary pajamas on an airplane. Do shallow people put on pajamas on a plane? No. Deep people. Look how deeply I'm looking in this picture into the airplane window as I lean against it, thinking about the outfit that I'm wearing. Something as well as she knows I'm educated. I learned from the school of mercy, throwing pork chops

at my head. Got an A plus in that one. So Dariq gets really offensive. Dariq gets really offended. Doreet gets really offended. Don't worry, she's gonna get offensive too. She's already offended. Would you expect anything less from Doreet? So Doreet gets very offended and she says,

you know we're near more educated than the rest of us, by the way, try to ride. It's like, oh. Doreet just, I mean, one thing she's good at is just hurling out of microaggression. You know, so there, here she is. Dereet on time as usual. Yeah. Uh, by the way, how old was Kyle when she had, when she got married to Marcio?

I think it was about the same age. I mean, also actually she's been married for 26 years. She's 55 now. I mean, actually she's been married for 26 years. She's 55 now. So that would say around 25, 25, 24. So there, so Kyle as a child bride too, Dereet. I thought she was further apart in age than PK because she's 47, she's close to my age.

Don't worry, Dereet, I'll always be older than you. And PK is 54, who knew? So, dear, God, I'm never gonna quit. So she says, because you were busy getting married at 12, the rest of us were building businesses, graduating college, doing things, you know. Starring in major motion picture films. Kyle, this is my model log.

So then we see a picture of Crystal's wedding to Rob and she was 24 and Rob was 45. Did you see the snooty post that Crystal made, like the bitchy Instagram post about all of this at Crystal made. No. I was like, should I look it up? Yeah.

It's a picture of her and Rob. It's this wedding picture that we see. And it says secrets to a happy marriage and then just basically lists a couple secrets. And then it says, make sure your husband buys you diamonds and doesn't just rent them. Wow. By the way, I just had a mini heart attack because Phaedra mentioned us in her story. as you diamonds, it doesn't just wet them. Ew, snap phone. Wow. By the way, I just had a mini heart attack because Phaedra mentioned us in her story. What?

What'd she say? Oh, because she's nominated for a crappy? Yeah, she's nominated. She just, she just regrammed. She actually didn't say anything. She just regrammed. And there you go. Nice.

Hey, put down that phone now. No, I asked Ben to pick up his phone. That's the biggest mistake. So did you hear about this news? No, I'm just kidding. I'm gonna close it. It's on Do Not Disturb. I'm not disturbing.

I'm only gonna disturb Ronnie. I'm at DNR. Theory Me, Garcelle asks, did you say that? And Crystal says, I would not say that to someone I just met. I mean, I don't feel that way, so I wouldn't say it. And she says, that's false. I would never say those things.

Video rewind, boodaloo, boodaloo, boodaloo, boodaloo, to confessional of Crystal saying, these women are quite savvy, but they're clearly not highly educated. They were just, Bravo was sitting on that just ready to rewind to that. I'm always so impressed at how they have like direct recall about any quote that happened over the past 10 years. I wonder if they must transcribe, they must have like transcriptions of all these shows

that they can just type in. A keyword, everything. You know, right. You know, you can keyword. Or maybe it's AI. So, um, Amarie is like, you know, I would like you to be like really honest though with like what you said about these ladies, please. And Chris goes, I didn't say that. Like, can't don't you believe me with my rock solid defensive? I would not say that to someone I just met.

I don't feel that way. Like, by the way, that was like the most guilty response of all time. I wouldn't say that because I don't feel that way. Just say no. Just say, yeah. Just say no. I absolutely did not say that. She's a fucking liar.

The end. Yeah. You know, but it's not the end because now everyone, of course, believes it because it's like so on brand, right? And, um, then we see flashbacks of Crystal Collin like everybody dumb basically in 2020 saying, I'm not gonna change the word I used. The word I used was used correctly.

I will not change the word. Violate means to abuse your privacy and a disrespect of boundaries, period. Google it. And 2021, I know these are big words for you. boundaries, period. Google it. And 2021.

I know these are big words for you. Oh, sorry. I thought you were going to do Garcell. I was waiting for you to do the Garcells response where Garcells like, Oh, we understand big words. So then, um, uh, we come back and Garcells like, yeah, we kind of already knew that Garcell, that crystal things that maybe some of us are not as, astute. There's a word for her. Killing it. Killing it at Barcelona. We'll whip about that two syllable to a trip up. Crystal, love that.

And then you said that the ladies were fake socialites and that you were the only true socialite in the group. And she goes, Oh, what? And Erica tells us, Isn't that a North East, Southeast kind of thing? What are we going to do with Catillion? Max, give me a fucking break. We all know that if you have a Catillion, it's really, it's like, it's symptomatic of something bigger like an eating disorder.

It's like, oh, it's not a medical thing, a Cthulhuans. So I love that Erika doesn't even consider the idea of a socialite being a local thing. It's like, wow, a rich person who actually gives to charity as part of their life mission. She's like, why would you fucking do that? What are we in New York City? Fuck that, I'm spending this shit.

Son goes, well, we all know that I am a socialite. So who cares? And Garcell's like, well, I don't want to be a socialite. And Amber's like, nobody does. Nobody wants to be a socialite. It is one of the most pathetic and sad. And there I say it, lonely and desperate things you want. Which part of you guys did you not hear me just say that uh, I'm a socialite BT dubs. I'm an idiot. I just realized that I said social I was thinking of philanthropists because I think of socialites as being like Rich ladies who are always on charities and stuff, but I guess I'm a philanthropist So I take I strike everything I just said and I would like to blame the gilded age

And while I brought up the television show the gilded age I would like to blame the Gilded Age. And while I brought up the television show, The Gilded Age, I also apologize to that show for saying, oh my God, you guys should go watch The Gilded Age, Bob Mackie does the costumes. Bob Mackie doesn't do the costumes. There's somebody named Bob who does something else and somebody else named Mackenzie that does something else

and they come on one name after the other and somehow my fucking bird brain put together, Bob Mackie. That's how gay this brain is. Is Bob Mackie alive? He is. I put together Bob Mackie. That's how gay this brain is. Is Bob Mackie alive? He is. I believe that Bob Mackie is. He is. Having lunch somewhere with Tina and others right now,

talking about how amazing it is that his career just reignited because some fucking podcaster shouted him out as the costume designer for Gilded Age and he just got a nomination for it. You're welcome, Bob. You're welcome. Can you do all the costumes for the Carol Burnett show? I think he did.

He's, I have no share. That I don't know. I'm too, I don't want to make another mistake. Yeah. We're, I, I, yeah. Um, not stupid already. We, it's our anniversary and the last thing we need to do is stick our feet further into our mouths.

Okay. Okay. It's already, I mean, you know, that ship has sailed, but whatever. So, like all of a sudden, like Bob Mackie is the line that we will not cross. Like guys, we've already been Bob Mackie. Well, let me do an Ann Marie apology. I'm sorry for anything I may have said.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I offended you, Bob Mackie. I may have said I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I offended you Bob Mackie. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry Yeah, this is the day our show is born and the day that we're cremating it. Goodbye everybody What a send-off or shall I say a send man off So anyway, like crystal could have said that. Yes, yes. And what that's basically saying is that my excuse for not being interesting, because my intellect is too teeny, teeny, tiny, is that everybody's older than educated and stupid. I will not stand for it. Everybody's older and educated and stupid. Mine will not stand for it.

And guess what? It's not that you, it's not that we're too dumb. It's that you're boring. So, Amory is like, I mean, this is like embarrassing. Like, why would you even like be denying this crystal? And Garcelle is like, Crystal, did you say that? So then Crystal, again, caught red-handed. So she is now trying to deflect.

Because first of all, it's offensive that you'd be asking me that. But no, I didn't say that. And Garcelle's like, well, she's asking you. She's accusing you, so I'm asking you. Now, have I said that I'm very social? Sure. Kyle says, well, all the socialites I do know, they don't exactly say, of course, Kyle coming in here to just innocently, you know, push Anne-Marie's story along. I was like, well, yeah, but the socialites I do know don't say that they're a socialite either.

So, I mean, what's the big deal with that? I love Kyle saying all the socialites I do know. I'm like, your sister. So, Crystal, she's like, I know some. It's like, yeah, your sister is the biggest socialite in the world. You know the most famous socialite in the entire world, your niece, Paris. Yeah, literally. So, Emery goes, the first time I met Crystal, that was when she told me that all the girls were uneducated and shallow. I mean, I thought it was really

crazy that someone I just met four seconds ago was telling me all this information. But like now, knowing Crystal better and how she acts, it's very unbranded for her to do something like that. Okay, snitches get stitches. Okay, watch your back because you've just activated Crystal and Crystal is terrible. Just kidding. You're going to be fine. You're going to be fine. Thanks for making an effort, actually. I'd like to say thank you for doing something.

So she says, you have this need. You have this need to like make people like you, you know, or you need people to think like that you're better than them or something. There's I don't need anything. I'm married to a very wealthy man. And son goes, yeah, she does. She really he directed the Lion King's better set for life And Amory goes well, that's all I've seen. That's all you've seen. I've met you six times in my life

That's like nearly half the amount of friends that I lost Crystal it doesn't matter because that's what you've shown me Okay, give me an example then give me an example of when I act like I'm better than you Okay, give me an example then. Give me an example of when I act like I'm better than you. Crystal, well, right now, right now you're doing it because like you're not being honest right now, which is basically acting like you're better than somebody else when you're not honest.

So. All right, well, give me another example. Give me another example. And we're like, oh, I didn't know the example game that you had to have two examples. Let me think about that for a second. So Kyle goes, obviously there's something about Amie that provokes Crystal because Crystal is usually someone who's like very reserved with her thoughts and feelings. And I've never seen her have a response to

someone like this. And I think that Amarie and Crystal just need to talk alone, quietly, intimately, maybe at the Chateau Marmont on the floor, just two beating hearts together. And we're getting drugs off somebody's stomach. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I was reading song lyrics on my phone. I know. What were we talking about? I know.

Also, why would you say something about Anne-Marie provokes crystal? Anne-Marie literally provokes crystal. She's literally provoking her right now. It's not something hidden that she's doing. And it's working. Yeah, can we like remember how like two weeks ago, Emery was like, oh yeah, you know, the susophagus, usually, I mean, it's, it's the, it's, you know, it could be, it could indicate

an eating disorder. And then, she's like, yeah, well, Crystal's the one who said it was, it was because of my eating disorder. Like, let's not forget that Emery fully gaslit that situation. Yeah. I wonder why. I wonder what it is about her. Deary me, but like you need to be better than everybody and then like you're asking me for examples and I give you one and then it goes back. Well, let me ask you a question. Let me ask you a question then.

And Deary, it's like, Dios, meos. Goodness, Zapato Camisa Azul! You need people to think that you're better than them. I need that. Yeah, it goes back to your insecurity thing, Crystal. Oh, oh really? The girl who calls herself a doctor who's actually a nurse? That's enough with you. Dun dun dun! And she tells us Emory says that she wants to bring lightness and fun to wherever she goes But actually she doesn't she's antigenistic and she's combative and she's a very very Divisive are those big enough words for everybody because I've been educated

And Marie is like okay crystal bring it down a notch bring it down a notch. Okay, bring it down crystal Crystal, bring it down a notch. Bring it down a notch. Okay, bring it down, Crystal. You're like a hormonal teenager, Crystal. She's like, do not tell me to calm down. She's like, hormones, hormones, hormones. Okay, do not make the little people come out, okay? The one with a wash rag around her waist.

Told me I was the only person here uglier than Shelley Long. What does that even mean? I mean, you don't even want to know what it's like to see Justine Bateman in the middle of the night. So, why is Justine Bateman in there? She's not small. Well, she was child actor. Well, she was a child actor. Well, she was well Mallory and she was welcomed by the little people.

OK, so they're not all little, the most the ghosts are little people, but they found just the big man. OK, but then Penny Yeathers broke in there. Jimmy Yeathers said, hey, do you all want to meet my sister? She's a big person, but I think she could get along with us. We are idiots. Okay. Where, where are we talking about? Uh, memory is still saying something.

Okay. Let me find it. So once she says, don't make the little people come out, Grisel just gives us one of her. You know what else I want from you, Grisel? I want to thank you for what? people come out, Christelle't use that one against me. You bitch. A robot goes to a thought such things could exist. Oh, oh, fucking fracking freaking tours. Cheese and crackers.

Oh, oh, did you just get attacked by did you get by attack by ghosts? Oh I'm crossing my leg and I hit the desk in it bash manian girl Oh god. Oh god god that reminds me some of so many memories with Merce So emory is like well look who didn't even react. He didn't even move his head. He stayed sleeping that whole time. I could have been dead over here. Oh, Bueller. Bueller's like, listen, I, I bash my head

on a fence once. This is nothing. It's like, this is my 12th anniversary of listening to this fucking Dreville. You think this bothers me? So Derit's, so Emery is like, well, I'm sorry that I trigger you. I'm sorry that you find my life so interesting. She has nothing to talk about except for me. So Dorit's like, guys, we've been up for a long time and we've traveled, we put on designer pajamas. And I think it's time we put a pin in it, which is exactly what I said to PK when I asked for a new costume for playing a mermaid

and pitter-pad live. And then Ann Marie just comes up with more nonsense and says, don't take my kindness for weakness. And Crystal responds, when have you ever been kind? When? When, Ann Marie? Yeah, that was a lot of stretching going on there. But you know what?

Do your yoga. Do what you got to do on your trip. Make your effort. That was good. I see. That was good. So then I was like, well, that was a good episode. But then I was like, wait, it's still going.

Okay. So, yeah, it suddenly basically summarizes everything and being like, hey, this is our first night in Spain. I thought it was going to be amazing. We got wine, we got tapas, we got this beautiful table. We've got a chef. We got what appears to be a shoelace for an appetizer, but we don't care because he's hot.

Hey, let's not ruin it. Okay. Garcelle wakes up at one in the morning and she's just scared of ghosts. So she goes to Sutton's room and they talk about ghosts and that's super fun. And then she decides to sleep with her and, um, what's going on here? Uh, Sutton's like, here's what I'm going to wear tomorrow. So she puts on this orange hat with like sunglasses on top, felt sunglasses that have holes in them, I guess. So you could on this orange hat with like sunglasses on top felt sunglasses that have holes in them.

I guess so you could see through to the eyes. Yes. Uh, you can, it was, it was an odd one. And, um, uh, Gershle, this is the ugliest hat I've ever seen. Who made this? Mars? Oh God. Well, tell him I'm sorry, but he had it coming. This is terrible. This is absolutely terrible. It's like my friend made this.

It's so cute. You stop. You just stop being mean in my hat. Well, I don't think I'm gonna be jealous of that. You are so crazy. So then Garcelle was talking about, this is just- Let's go to the next morning.

So it's the next morning and, um, everyone's kind of gathering to talk about Ann Marie versus Crystal. Garcelle goes to Ann Marie's room cause I guess she picked the short straw. I don't really know why else she would, but she goes and, um, she's joking about who cares. So then we hear Erica going What the hell is that? Oh, that's a new vocal exercise I've learned. Basically, I'm in court so much. I'm finally asking them to pardon this turkey.

Oh, of course, of course! I hear George doing that all the time. The hood sounds more like chains clanking against the radiator. Ha-ha-ha-ha! The ones I hear coming from George's room sound like this. Help me!

Help me! Please bring a key while this is done! I've been escorting time to a a mediator. Please help me. Someone please come in here and turn on find my phone. So now Sutton goes into Crystal's room and she's like, hey, how you feeling about last night? I got so heated. Okay, let me just close the door here and Crystal's like, um, uh, she's a lot. Okay. Cause I don't think that she listens and then we go back to my favorite part because

Sutton's like, okay, let me close the door. Should I close it? I'm going to close it. Hey, close this door, which is the door cause there's the door and then there's a closet to the right and a closet to the left and they all are the same wood. It's like, wait a minute. It's like Dorinda in her spaceship room. Yes.

So then back in Ann Marie's, Ann Marie is saying, I don't like confrontation, which is why I confronted Crystal in front of everybody at dinner. And I really don't like being in a bad place with people, which is why I accuse Sutton of having an eating disorder publicly. You know, you know how it goes. So I just want us to be good, you know what I mean? Because like that being said, she's not being truthful about what she told me about the group. So she for sure said that. You know, yeah, I do not lie.

I don't lie. And then Crystal saying, I mean, oh Sutton's saying to Crystal, she's calling you a liar in front of the whole group. And Crystal's like, yeah, but I don't believe anyone believes it honestly. Right. No one believes that I would ever call you guys a bunch of fake social life and dumb. And like, what did she also say? I said, she said, um, you guys aren't even married to anyone who's made an iconic cartoon. Like I would never say something like that.

So Erica and Rita still in the living room and Erica's like, well, do you think Crystal called us dumb, dumb, stupid, shallow, uneducated whore to what? Well, I don't remember the whore part, but well, she would have been correct mostly. Am I right? I mean, come on, look around. And Dereed says, uh, no, I don't believe that I'm really flat out making it up

or telling you that much. Erica thinks that there's some truth in it. She doesn't think that Ann Marie would just pull that out of nowhere. She goes, well, you know, we all get frustrated in this group. We all say things. Some of us even do this. But you know what? If we're uneducated and shallow, then why be here?

Oh, gosh, it's not like she's sitting with you at a real lunch table. You're on television, that's why she's here. I know. Who else? She doesn't have the power to recast the shows. You're stuck with the idiots you get, you know? Yeah, son's like, is it okay for her to call you a liar? And Chris goes, no, it's ridiculous.

I don't know what else to say. Well, why are you letting her off the hook? She goes, well, here's the thing. This is the difference He needs someone to say that wasn't said in order for you to feel better and I don't Sutton says, you know, we all know oh, Chris and I have had some very very challenging times I mean like the time she had the challenge of having clothes on when someone Innocently comes to their room to bring them a jacket. I mean, is that so hard? challenge of having clothes on when someone innocently comes to their room to bring them a jacket.

I mean, is that so hard? My children know black people, okay? There was one in our hot tub one time. So anyway, that's my, they're here nor there. I forget why I'm talking about that. All I gotta say is you're not a color of Benetton started in my hot tub. So, because Sutton's like,

hey, you know what, just keep sticking up for yourself because what she's saying isn't nice. Am I asking you to fight a proxy battle on behalf of my esophagus? Yes, I am. So, God damn it. Um, Sutton is like, you know, just, uh, Crystal says she's going to tread lightly and Sutton says, well, you need to tell her she's gonna tread lightly and Sutton says well you need to tell her she's not miss with you or myself because everybody convenes and goes to get in the Sprinter van and Erica's like hey how about we go see a cathedral and do some confession cuz some of your bitches name it.

That's right. Well I've got some good news to share with you all I've been cast in turkey lay miss Bring him turkey On my Oh My Pretend that he's Huge look okay Got news so I got good news guys remember last year How you guys are being bitches to believe up the diamond earrings and I said, well, mine were deservedly mine

that I didn't steal from any goddamn orphans of widows and they didn't deserve a fucking thing from my ears? All right, well, guess what? Let me redo something that just came out in the newspapers today. Everett Cajun, insittin' all charges gets to keep diamond in the earrings and if the widows and orphans paid from the judge says,

well, good, it was worth it every fucking penny Everyone's like oh So what does that mean? Well the court wants the trustee to prove that the money used to pay for the earrings earrings was the actual clout from Money in other words you can't prove that the money was used by my errands So you can't do that and they shouldn't have taken the errands in the first place. So boo, yeah, everyone. And everyone's,

yes. And she tells us, oh, well, these ladies will so mean to me. So mean. And now they see that I was right the whole time. I am innocent, innocent of all charges I say. No, that's actually not what they means, what that means. And you know, that's that kind of scuzzy lawyer, Ronald, whatever who is coming after Erica, who still is, by the way, he bought his wife those earrings at the auction.

I had heard that, but I didn't know that was true. But I was looking at these news stories. See, he still has them. He wasn't ordered to give them back to her because it was argued by the trustee who is dealing with that estate that they're still not Erica's. Like Erica doesn't have the right

to any of that money anyway because her husband is a fucking criminal who defrauded a lot of really innocent people out of a shit ton of money. And you're still trying to walk around in diamond earrings that that money funded. And even if they didn't fund that, they still funded your whole fucking life.

Have some, I mean, my God, lady, have some fucking respect. At least pretend you don't want to wear them in public. You know what I mean? Come up with a better argument. We don't need to re-lit it, get the whole Erica thing. I just think it's funny that Erica is having such a great season, and she's like, guess what? I need to make it very clear. I'm innocent. Well, that's actually, I mean, that's kind of what Garcell says. She's like, Garcell's basically like, um, I wish you would just like, we'll let the earrings go, just like sell them and give something back to these victims. Even like, you're not guilty, even though you're not guilty, you're giving something back

and you need the good karma. Yes. Yes. That was a much easier, shorter way of saying it. I should have just kept breathing through my notes because that was way better. Yeah. But it was our anniversary and like there could be no better anniversary gift than you getting like a little, a little moment of getting mad about the situation, me getting mad for in the defense of widows and orphans.

So of course, you know what happened the minute this was said, right? I pressed pause and I went on Google, and I read stupid people magazine articles for an hour. I know, I know, I know you did. So the woman don't seem to really care. Like, okay. And so I was like, well, the thing that you're saying, because you got loud, like maybe when it's so loud, we can't hear. So like maybe we don't get so loud, which is so hilarious. Erica's like, look, I'm vindicated. I'm legally

vindicated. Yeah, but you were loud before. So don't be a loud person. Let me tell you one thing. Most loved silence. I can't control people's reactions, but I was expecting more from these bitches. I really was. I don't need anybody to put their arms around me, but I do need you to acknowledge that I'm innocent, innocent from the beginning. Luckily when I go to sleep tonight, I know I'll get a nice warm hug from the ghost of Balkie Bartokovis.

They are on their way to the chapel now. And Anne-Marie is saying, we need to come up with things to say like set our intentions for the trip. I'm like, I hope we get to the chapel and Crystal doesn't call the saints poor and uneducated. So it'd be embarrassing. I don't even think they had college back then. You know what? I have a lot of disappointment and a lot of these women in this trip, you know, like you were so passionate last year, but after I've gotten the favorable rule and everybody's like, I need to get out. I need to get out. Um, they're on this like twisty, really high road. So we don't know what's going on if she's, uh, has a fear of heights,

but she feels sick. And by the way, the producers are real asshole cause she's like, oh my God, oh my God, you need to stop the car right now. I'm going to throw up. They's like, what? Do you need us to stop the car? I need, I'm going to throw up. I don't know.

Wait, you want us to stop the car? I need to throw up. Should I stop the car? Well, everyone's like, stop the car? I need, I'm gonna throw up. I know, wait, you want us to stop the car? I need to throw up. Should I stop the car? Everyone's like, stop the car. Should I stop? You want, wait, so you, I just want to clarify. You want me to put my foot on the brake, put it in park, stop the car so you can get out and throw up. It's like, stop the fucking car already. She's gonna puke. Jesus. Yeah. So then she goes out and I don't think she pukes.

I don't know, but she's, looks like she's going to puke. So they sit with her and she's like, oh my God, guys, look at my veins and we look at her veins and they're big. And Emery is like, oh my God, holy crap. Those are really, really big veins. So. Yeah, it's probably from an STD. That's what I've heard.

Son, why'd you say that? So that's the cliffhanger of all things. I thought the cliffhanger, I thought the big dinner party was going to be like the climax. There'll be a to be continued, but the to be continued is Crystal needs to barf on the side of the road. So will she barf? Will her veins like stop being so big? That's something that would be a week to find out about. Yeah, like literally nobody knows what's going to. And Kyle, Kyle's like, huh, the universe works in mysterious ways. Last night, these two were at each other's throats and now

crystals at Ann Marie's mercy. And I'm not having an affair. Oh my God, why would you say that? Let me tell you what's not very mercy. barfing on the side of the road. He never would have done that But he did barf on me several times he would say get over here. I want to show you something I'd be like what is it you got? God so many times I fell for it each and every time Love that Everybody thank you so much for being here happy anniversary to all of you who've been with us.

Even if you weren't here on the first episode, you know what? Thank you so, I wasn't here on the first episode either. Actually, I missed the first episode. So, there you go. We're in the same boat. But thank you for everything you do for us, you guys. We love you. Come see us at the Crappies February or stream us, you know, whichever you guys would prefer.

Tickets are at watchwattcrapins.com for that February 17th show. Be sure to go vote in prelims right now. Get all of your links for tickets, voting, etc. at WatchWhatCrapins.com and we will talk to you next time. Bye! Watch What Crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no bologna. Strollin' the park with Caitlyn Clark. She's not just a Sheila. She's a Daniela.

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We love him madly, it's Kyle Podge-Shadley. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. We wanna hang with Liz Lang. The incredible, edible Matthew sisters. Give him hell, Miss Noel. She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke. Shannon out of a cannon Anthony. Let's take off with Tamla Plain.

She's quite the catch. It's Victoria Cachett. She ain't no shrinking violet kutar. We love you guys. Hey Prime members, you can listen to Watch Our Crappings, ad free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen ad free with Wondery Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself

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