Watch What Crappens - #2318 RHOBH: Emerging from the Ashes

Episode Date: February 8, 2024

On Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (S13E15), Sutton spreads Merce’s ashes - mainly on the other women - and then everyone attempts some flamenco dancing because… Spain! To watch the video version of this recap and for this week’s Summer House bonus episode, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. And grab both live and streaming tickets for the 2024 Golden Crappies Awards Feb 17 at watchwhatcrappens.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously, but hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to watch our crappins the podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker joining me today as usual, the wonderful, the amazing, probably the best flamenco dancer that I know.

Mr. Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How are you? Well, I guess I just stomped my feet around so much when we're together that you thought I was a flamenco dancer. That's not a flamenco thing. That's not a flamenco beat. That's not a flamenco beat. I just have very low patience.

That's all. If I don't get my way, just start stomping my feet around. And in this relationship, we call that flamenco. OK? That's what keeps us happy. You know, we often talk about every now and then a word will come up and we'll be like, that sounds like it should be like a place in Orange County. Like, what was the one that we'll be like that sounds like it should be like a place in Orange County

Like what was the one that we're like this sounds like I should be a boutique in Orange County We came up with like two months ago. Oh that was during words. I don't know But I was that was some funny shit, but I feel like flamencos should be like a neighborhood barn grill and Tustin or something Are you gonna go to flamencos today? Yeah, they've got a it's Tuesday. They have a steak special You know, I just wanted to go somewhere we can talk. It's kind of noisy there. Oh, but they have great margaritas at Flamencos. Well, I was gonna ride my pet bull over there,

but he just gets so upset every time we go to Flamencos. He tries to kill the employees there. Oh, you know what? I'll meet you at Flamencos, but first I gotta pick something up at Zensations. Zensations, that know what? I'll meet you at Flamenco's. But first, I got to pick something up at the Zensations. Zensations. That's what it is. I love how I made the people in Orange County episode on an accent. It's because we're doing a sudden episode. So, you know, you've got to start. Yeah. And then you've got to start. So today we're

at Merse. We are at Merse. Today we are talking, It's gonna be a Mars. Mars. Today we are talking at Real House on the Beverly Hills. Before we get into that, the golden crappies just around the corner. I cannot believe it's a week away. We have so much work to do. Like you don't even know how much work Ronnie and I are doing right now.

It's like a lot of work right now. But, I don't think I'm gonna do it. I don't think I'm gonna do it. I was thinking about it today. I was doing it and I was like, this is so hard. I got up at 6.30 and I was like, this is too much. I can't do it. That's like a lot. I was thinking about it today. I was doing it and I was like, this is so hard. I got up at 6.30 and I was like, this is too much. I can't do it and I'm stressing.

And then I was like, who's gonna, I'm just not gonna do it. I mean, what are they gonna do to us? We're the boss. So I'm not doing shit. Well, how about that? The problem is that we like, we are ambitious people and you know, we always wanna make these things awesome

and cool and maybe this year we'll add this or that. And so it's just like getting harder and harder and we have people helping us this year but we keep on adding more to our plate. So we're dumb-dumbs for that. But we are going to have this year. It's fun work though. It's fun work.

I was just doing cutouts of all the housewives. That's what I was doing this morning. I was cutting out all the housewives to put them in like a thing. And who can really complain? I was like cutting out all the housewives to put them in like a thing. And you know, I mean, who can really complain? You know? I know, I started building the slideshow for the nominees that will appear on the big screen.

And like it's on PowerPoint, which is like a foreign thing for me. And that's like, it's own, it's just PowerPoint. It's its own drama, yeah. It really is its own drama. It's like, it's a very large program. Why would you open up a PowerPoint portal for yourself for the year?

I don't want to be in a PowerPoint portal. If there's a better portal for me to be on, I will be on it. But right now PowerPoint seems to be where my portal is. But you know what? You know what? We're working hard because we support other women. But guess what? You guys can work hard too, because you can vote.

You can vote in this. It's actually not hard to do at all. It's actually really fun. Go to watchacrapins.com and you can vote on who you want to win all these categories. It's super, super fun. It takes a minute. Send it to all your friends.

Have a blast with it. And then when you're done voting, be sure to buy a ticket to the Golden Crappies. February 17th is when we're gonna read the winners to for all the people that you voted for. It's gonna be down time LA at the Palace Theater. Come join us. If you can't be there in person, get a streaming ticket.

Moment is gonna be streaming it for us. All the links, all the information you could possibly ever want in life, truly in life. Is at watchacrarapins.com. And that includes Patreon, including Crap is on Demand, which we're on, of course we're on video, look at us, look at us, take a look, take us all in.

And that's all the news. That is the big news, huh? Okay, well let's move on to some Beverly Hills action, shall we Ben? Oh my God, I would love nothing more in the world than to do that. Okay. Actually, the only thing I would love more in the world Too much flamenco

Yeah, I actually was doing something before this today. I'm not just sitting around on my pajamas like usual and It's weird. I'm sitting here in pants and I had shoes on I mean, I don't even know how to work like this I feel like I'm in a straight jacket. Who works in pants? I mean, it's ridiculous. I know, I'm in pants too, but they're sweatpants, they barely count. Well, no, I wear sweatpants all the time, but these are like jeans.

Proper pants. Yeah, I mean, I feel like it's the 1800s. I feel like a pioneer, like in full, very thick clothing, you know? With toggles, or doggs, and... Buckles and toggles. Buckles and you're like, well, this morning I was barn raising and now I'm here to talk about

Real Housewives of Berkeley Hills. Actually, no, this morning I was getting injections of testosterone pellets into my butt. Okay, that's what I was doing. And I wish they would have told me that there were gonna do that like that. I would have done a squat. I mean, my God, I was like, I'm so sorry.

I said, I'm so sorry for my mushy butt and she didn't say anything back. And I was like, oh my God, this means she's really upset with my mushy butt. And so now I'm just like, oh my God, I'm so mushy butted and testosterone. Do you know that I have no testosterone? I know that that doesn't shock anybody out there.

It certainly didn't shock the lady who told me. She's like, yeah, you don't have any testosterone. Like she just saw that one coming. I was like, why'd you even do a blood test then? Okay, why don't you just tell me what else is wrong with me? Go on to binge eating disorder. Just move down the fucking line lady, okay? I'm here to be judged.

You know, testosterone is actually the house sauce that you get at Flamencos. Did I get that with some testosterone-y sauce? So I didn't know, so they have to inject a pellet. How do you inject a pellet? Like I think like an injection you inject a fluid or pellet used to get up the bum hole. It wasn't in a shot.

So basically maybe injection is the wrong word. They finagled. Is this a repository? No, it's not in my butthole. She cut a little hole in my butt on the flesh. Oh, got it. And then she shoved stuff in there. And then I had some numbing stuff,

so I couldn't really feel what she was doing. It's like a little backpack. I did hear tinkering. I heard like metal tinkering against metal. And then I felt her like pulling my skin. I said, what are you doing back there? It feels like you're trying to get jeans on me. And she said, getting pellets in you.

So I don't know. She said, well, she had to lodge them up in there. It's like a mailbox, right? You open the thing and you put the thing in there and you close it. It's like testosterone. It's like, and it's like closed on your butt. I think so.

Except you just let the male sit in there And it's slowly read over the course of six months So that's sort of like my mouth situation So if I change I just wanted to announce it not that anybody really cares about the testosterone in my butt, but I Could be a totally different person in a week And so I just want everybody to know you know if things change and I'm like, you know what Ben? I've changed. You're gonna be like, you know what Ben,

for the crappies instead of doing like a show tune, why don't we like just do like highlights from the NFL? Like what happened to Ronnie? I'll be like, okay, here's my idea. Here's my idea for the opening of the crappies. I want you to run to that side of the stage. I'm gonna throw a ball and then you're gonna catch it, bitch, you got it.

How about we do something from like bar stool sports? Let's like read some stuff off that website. I'm like, Ronnie, what's happening to you? Like, I don't even know who Patty Lapone is. Like, Ronnie! Okay, so let's go on. Oh yeah, what a way to start. So Kyle is comforting Sutton

because she just got testosterone pellets in her butt and found out that she has no testosterone and she feels like less of a man for it. Yeah, Sutton's talking about how she's been carrying around Merce for all these years. Actually in her butt, she actually has like a Merce pouch back there. I know, I got some Merce for all these years, actually in her butt, she actually has like a Merce pouch back there. I know.

I got some Merce injected into my butt. And I left there doing plies and jetés. It was crazy. It's more like the testosterone was installed. Installed, yeah. It was like you got like, you know, when you have to add more RAM to your computer, at least when you used to be able to do that before solid states. Don't say RAM when we're talking about injecting things

into my butt, please. Hey, there's no stigma in being a bottom. Who says there's stigma? You know what there's stigma and fucking pain? That's what it is. Ram me. You're not ramming me. I don't want a ram truck, nothing ram.

I'm about to say, a week from now you'll be like, you know what I want, a ram truck. Oh, Ben, I forgot to tell you something. 40 is the best in Texas. Okay, so Sutton's crying, and okay, let's get serious now. It's a very serious moment. So Sutton's crying because she is not only scattering Merse's ashes, she's also scattering the ashes of her

marriage. Okay? Yes. Because her marriage was a big part of her life and she was so angry so long because she got dumped basically. And so she's very upset. Um at least you're rich. I don't know if that's not really fair to say to rich people because I know that rich people really fair to say to rich people because I know that rich people have problems too. They just do it so much more richly than the rest of us. Then it's hard for me to feel bad

because like you got divorced, you got dumped. I get it, that hurts, okay? I'm not saying you deserve it. I really like Sutton. And I don't want her to be hurt, but you get $300,000 a month. You know what I mean? Can't that comfort you?

Can't that hug you? Hug that. Hug all those Benjamin's. Ha ha ha. Or just hug me. I'm a Benjamin. Yeah. Yeah, I agree.

And so, yeah. So then her friend Trevor comes over and he's like, Hi. Hi. How are you today? Hi, Saturn. Oh, I can't believe that Merce stayed so long in this Ziploc bag.

So she pours the ashes into a little box, you know, and then some of it falls on the coffee table and they sort of like brush it into the box, you know. Like back in the day. Like they did back when Merce let them house it for him. They had his apartment alone. I was like, Hey, you're going to sniff it. Sign.

Are you going to sniff it? He talks like a heroin in a 1930s movie. Doesn't he? He's got this like kind of effect, that kind of this accent to his, his voice. I think he sounds actually more like the villain of them. Like, well, it could be either heroin of a 1930s movie, you know, once the talk he started, because imagine if he's just like a,

he sounds like the heroin in a 1917 movie and he's just like piano, but his voice just like, like, piano. I don't know why my hands are up when I do that. For those on video, I don't like this. I put my hands up. Like I was my, I was like, performance. We're talking about theater now. But he's either in 19, I'm talking about theater,

so my hands are up. He's either 1930s heroin or he's like 2014 alt take on a villain and a James Bond villain. And he's like, alt take on a villain and a James Bond thing. Like, speaking of very fair voice, cause I'm so evil. Oh, really? You're going to threaten me with old mercy again.

Are you? So. Oh, Sutton, Sutton, Sutton, you fell into my trap. Oh, your friends will Sutton, Sutton, you fell into my trap. All your friends will be dead by midnight. So Sutton's like, this morning, I'm realizing, I'm not just Sutton, Mercedes Ashes go. I'm two decades of my life. Here's what I have to say to the past two decades.

Bye. Bye now. Bye. Take all your trash out with you. I can't leave me alone. I live for today. And guess what else I live for? Tomorrow, by yesterday, you're dead to me.

OK? And everyone here is in. Bye. So yesterday. Don't remember anything about you. So yesterday. I was two decades. You know what I was thinking about?

Whenever Sutton talks about all this different time with Christian and Mercy... my vision of it is like sudden in like... it's like 1988 they're listening to fine young cannibals she falls in love with Christian they have this this like this big like Reagan era Bush era romance but 20 years ago was 2004 actually and it just does not it it's like, wait, what? I don't like, I don't feel like I'm ready for 2004 to be like, like remember back when we were married in 2004. Like I'm not ready for 2004 to be like that, you know?

Like the old days, you mean? The old days, yeah. Yeah, it's like spanking, alfalfa, racing, you know, little cars they made out of Apple boxes or whatever apple crates. I want like the old day. Honestly, I don't even want the 80s to be the old days. I'm like very resistant to that. Like I want the old days to be maybe the 70s. Like I want something to be like, I remember when Krishna fell in love, we'd just seen a Roy Schad of film and we said that man knows how to star in a movie, you know. Yeah, I don't like it being the old times either.

I saw that they remade the movie Mr. and Mrs. Smith. I'm like, how are they remaking this? This came out like two years ago. It did not come out two years ago. It came out a very long time ago. I'm just still young looking. I was so weird how the rest of the world just ages, but I don't.

Well, I was thinking this morning, I don't know why I was thinking about this this morning, but I was thinking the TV show Laguna Beach, I'm pretty sure is now 20 years old, which means that all those kids that are like locked in times being high schoolers, like Jessica and Dieter, they're all fucking 38 now. And I don't know how to deal with that.

Like that's wild. My niece the other day asked how we met Manny You and I said Blogging and she said what's that? Oh, no So that's where we're at. Okay, so I guess we have by the way Roddy I bet we've already I we know each other for now like almost 20 years is that crazy We that is like sons marriage crumbled and then ours began Season two of Top Chef is when I started writing for a.

That was 2006. So yeah, we're 18 years old. 18 years old, that's nuts. Okay, so Sutton is realizing that it's time to let everything go and to stand on her own. I'm assuming she means figuratively. Not monetarily, not financially, because I would stop her.

I would be like, no, no, don't do that yet. Until you've signed everything over to me. You just stand on your own, it's crazy. I just hope that she brought a freeze-dried mouse so she could finally, literally let the mouse go. Also, 2004 was such a depressing time. You have to put yourself back there because that was like 9-11. Like the whole world changed right after that.

And it took a long time to get used to like the lines of the airport. You know what I mean? Like a lot of shit went down. And so that was, that's like a sad time to be dumped. My God, I feel for her. Well, I mean, she, at least it was three years after 9-eleven So like we had started to come back to some sort of normalcy like pop music was Like that was I think that was the time when like yeah

It was on the radio perhaps on the Super Bowl Wow You know basically is the piano music when someone is tied to the train tracks. Do you think that's how, do you think that's truly how Christian left Sutton, where she's like, are you leaving me? And he presses the plate. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait, hold on, rest. Yeah. And then little John, yeah. Oh, by the way, I wanted to tell the listeners, if you're wondering while we're not talking about the show, nothing happens. Okay, so then she cries a little bit.

Yeah, yeah. And Trevor is like, hello ladies, it's good to see you all again. And Garcelle's like, did you have fun the other night? You handsome beast. And he's like's like, did you have fun the other night? You handsome beast. And he's like, oh, you were fantastic. My friends were so, so happy to meet you all. True. Yes, my good friend Juliette Pompadou, Haraglu said that

she's going to make a service station in the shape of Derit's hair. And that's her fallow garden was talking the other day as she was about to receive the key to the city about how much she enjoyed talking with y'all over Paella. Queen Tuplett Testeronica said she was so enamored with Erica Jean that she's going to commission a public space that represents her left nipple. Because yeah everybody, my friends left meeting and she goes, even Erica? And we'd see a flash back to drunk Erica being like,

my sis is in the palm. So they now all get into the bands to go to the ash, the very, very public ash spreading ceremony. And they're dating. Hey guys, if you're gonna do an ash ceremony, don't go to Disneyland. Like you're in a public space. Like can you go somewhere else? You're literally just gonna do this at the end of the pier.

Like I shouldn't have to worry about getting your friend in my eye. Like also, like maybe don't do this, like right in front of the line of like at the, like cheesecake factory of stitches, right? Like there's so many tourists walking by just looking at them like, why are these ladies all crying? Yeah. So, so they're in the, they're in the vans and everything and they're heading through this beautiful, beautiful scenery and Trevor's like,

oh, this is welcome to my cute little town. I'm assuming you would never know that we secretly murdered dolphins in a cave down below. Oh, I'm not evil. There's a whole gay strip out there with all sorts of gay parties. There's this whole cave that you swim to where people go to hug up. I was like, could you just try less to be like you're in white lotus too right now? I'm not really sure what he's doing.

It sounds like he's he's kind of like a Marilyn Monroe like. I don't mean his voice. It just means this whole demeanor of like, I'm a so sexy. I'm just a sex. I just think that because of White Lotus lotus too, I just no longer trust Gays of a certain age in Europe who like women of a certain age. I'm like he's up to something

Yeah, he's good. Careful from you. So be careful so So he's like so she sounds like well, I heard that it's bear week and I kind of like bears Oh, I heard that it's bear week and I kind of like bears. Ooh, I do too. Yeah, that might be my top. And Garcelle is like, what's a bear? Oh, come on. And they're like, what?

Like everybody of course, except Erica, is confused. And this goes to prove our point that we've been making on this podcast for years, which is we need to stop servicing these housewives, like where they're fucking indentured servants, okay? Because every time we see a gay on Bravo thing, oh my God, Sutton! They're like following them around like Avi,

you know, just falling all over themselves to like please them. And Avi's an employee, but you know, or we get like a Justin on Beverly Hills who's just like, Kyle, you are hilarious! Like team Kyle, no matter what. You know, we get that kind of gay, which is fine. But this is what these women think of us, okay?

They don't even know what a fucking bear is. They haven't listened to one thing you said. Put down their goddamn purse and go find other friends. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, I think we're about to, this is something that will be explored further, probably in real Housewives of Miami this week too. So meaning the one-way friendship of it all. So yeah, they're all like, what's a bear?

I'm so gonna have it. Yeah. And Erica's like, well, well, mussels, oh, oh, it could also be someone who is familiar with the geography of Lebanon or is mountains with snow but also a beach. I've been there, I've heard of it. I understand. It's a fertile Crisine, that's what it is.

Yes, I'm aware of the Thub from Lebanon who wrote the prophet, I'm aware of everything. It's like, okay, Erica. So Erica starts saying, well, you could also be a muscle queen or you could be a slim bear or a baby bear or a cub. And Sutton's like, Otter, I think is the word you're trying to go, which, okay, Sutton is excused

from everything I just said. Sutton got Otter. That's a deeper cut for, I think like most, I feel like most women probably have heard about the concept of a bear, but otter is like a little bit of a deeper cut. So Garcell's like, oh, well, I just mean house. I don't mean women in general. I mean, specifically real housewives, like, right, you're literally on Bravo.

We, our whole life is built around you. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, we're obsessed with you. How dare you not know what a bear is? Be obsessed with us. So Garcell's like, what? Well, Andy Cohen was on my podcast and I said to Andy, I need to know, are you a top or are you a bottom?

And he goes, I'm a powerful top Garcell. And then I said, I bet you are. Now what is a top and what is a bottom? I don't understand this. Ha ha ha. And her friend said, I'm a blouse. That's a feminine top, which I think it's pretty funny. I've never heard of that one. So then, um, by the way, if anyone wants to know what a bear is just tune in next week. I want to wrap it up after running. How do we go to the next round? Yeah. You You guys are gonna hear my growler app going off.

It's gonna be like, eww. You have a new. The hair will be coming out of every pore. Yeah, am I gonna grow more hair on this testosterone stuff? Oh God. Not on my head, I'll bet you anything. My back will be like, you know, ponytailed, but my head won't get any hair.

I'll have like, nut hair down to my knees, but my head's not gonna gain shit. I can tell you that right now. I'm already mad about testosterone. It is working. I know, I think you're mad about something, so that's, that seems normal actually. Very testosterone-y.

But actually, extremely normal. From Wondery, this is Black History For Real. I'm Francesca Ramsey. And I'm Consciously. What do most people think about when they hear the words Black History? Rosa Parks, Reconstruction, MLK, February Black History Mom. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories of Black history that we just are not really talking

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and death. Follow Academy on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Academy early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crap- time for a crappin's commercial So they they all get out of the band this gorgeous gorgeous city and walking around and

Sun's joking about like Trevor don't drop mercy's in a non-zip-lock bag anymore, and they're walking They're walking around we see they're walking through the they've shown these umbrellas a million times They finally walk to the they go through the umbrellas a million times. They finally walk to the, they go through the umbrellas, you know, the ones that are hanging over the street. And- Watch out everybody, Kyle's storyline's coming up. Hold on, wait for it. Kyle likes to shop everybody.

I believe it's not her storyline, I believe it's her personality. Yeah. It's her identity, guys. She's like, oh my God, there's places to shop, guys. I'm like, wow, Kyle likes likes to shop that is so wacky So she's joking about like needing to pull over. She's like oh Guys, I can't like stand anymore. I need to like sit down right here next to the shop. I love this shop. It's crazy

Yeah, and so They're like looking at trinkets and stuff and okay, so then they sort of like They're looking at trinkets and what's it's galore? Think about bombs. They've got plenty But who cares? Nothing's real. I forgot that lyric. Sorry. I want mooo That was a plan words. Let me see. Get it

Oh, that was a plan words. Let me see, get it. So it's time to have the ceremony. So in the middle of this busy ass touristy area, they just sort of stop at the side, sort of over the water and decide they're gonna have this very nice ceremony for Merce. But like literally there's like Pam in her straw hat, you know, with her camera around her neck walking by.

I'd be like, is that Kyle Richards from Real House? I said, Beverly Hills, I'm gonna take a real quick picture. I was like, they did not cordon off this area very well. Yeah, they really didn't. They just walked to the end of the public pier. And Sutton is talking about, she gives a speech and she's like, it's not just about my dad, it's about my husband, it's about everything.

It's about Lisa, I'm just kidding, I'm glad she's not. So she goes through this, she tells us about her divorce and she says, near the end of her marriage, she got a phone call from Christian and he said, you need to get an attorney, uh, cause you're gonna get, uh, papers today. So yeah. And then he said, I'm looking for a lady in the streets, but a freak in the bed. I didn't understand what that really meant.

And he went, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Hold on. Rest. Yeah. I wasn't quite sure why he was agreeing with himself so much, but I felt it was offensive. So this is just how guys operate, I guess. God, men are so fucking cold, right? I think straight men.

I feel like gay men don't operate like this. I can't imagine just calling someone and being like, oh yeah, you're gonna need a lawyer because I've filed divorce papers. You would know if I was gonna divorce your ass, okay? You'd be like, for weeks, you'd be like, why are my tires always flat? Like, who put a brick through my windshield, you know?

Like, why was there super glue in my underwear? You know? Things like that. Like, I feel like it wouldn't be a surprise for me, but straight guys are just like, they're so cold. They're just like, yeah, I'm divorcing you. Been planning it for a while. Had a whole thing drafted.

Bye. Yeah, got like a surplus of surplus of testosterone in my system now, and I really don't have time to drag this out. Just gonna have to parse you. Listen, I have not had a boner that's lasted longer than seven minutes in years, so I have no time to waste. Time's a ticket. So, something's like, yeah, we all have stuff at our lives that we hold on to,

and I really want y'all to do this for me. I know, I know it's hard. I know it's hard. So they're just talking about how they're surprised. They didn't realize. Kyle, of course, is like, you know, I think that Sutton has been in like a lot of pain regarding our divorce much more than any of us could have imagined.

I'm like, well, definitely much more than you could have imagined Kyle because you never check it on your friends. Kyle's always like, who is Christian again? Can you remind me? You're Christian. So there's a Christian, so you broke up with Christianity. What religion are you now?

You were dating a Christian. So, Gareth, you know, they're talking about like, how sad this is for Sutton and stuff. And Sutton's like, we're gonna say goodbye and we're gonna let all three of those men go. And so they do. And they throw the ashes over and of course they hit everybody in the face

because that's how God works. God wants the dead mess all over you. We've seen it many times on these shows. MJ's father, the doll gone on Milu, yes, on Real Housewives of New York. Don't do that on Bravo because God's like LOL. Yeah, just lower the box into the water with a rope or something, I don't know.

So yeah, it gets all over everyone. Kyle of course makes a big fit about it. It's like, it's on me, it's like all over me, it's in my mouth, it's on me. It's like all over me. It's in my mouth. Like it's literally on everyone, but Kyle's acting like she's the most ashed over. So, but Sun's like, for everything, Sun is like actually very like amused by it.

She's like, she's cracking up. I thought she would be like, and I messed this up too, but she's okay. She's okay. Yeah, she loves that Merce like gotten all of their eyes, you know? Yeah. So then Kyle gives her a hug and she's like, oh my God, Sutton, I love you, Sutton, I love you so much.

No, I just want to point out, someone posted on, somewhere on the internet, okay, which is a pretty big place, I know, but someone posted a clip from the after show and Kyle's really an asshole, Okay. And I know a lot of the show is dedicated to what an asshole Kyle is. And I'm sorry, because I know that Kyle has a lot of stands. And it's

got to get annoying for you, you guys. So first, I'd like to say to you bye, because I don't care. But second of all, Kyle's really an asshole. She went on that after show. And she was like, I mean, Erica, have you ever heard of Merce before? Like, has she ever mentioned him? Now, I know that she probably wanted an excuse to go to Spain and like have the storyline of throwing his ashes, but like she'd never even mentioned. So all of this Kyle pretending to be nice and hugging Satna saying, I love you is a is a load of crap, you know, because then she goes on the after show and basically accuses her of

faking it for a storyline Kyle's track record with this sort of shit is so bad Like how many times has she done this to people? Um, have we ever heard about this person? Have you ever heard about this person? I mean, this is gonna sound very like rude and callous, but like what if we had said Who's Lenore or Lee name, Lenore, right? Is that her friend's name? The point is that like, there are people in people's lives that they don't necessarily advertise all the time,

but Kyle has a blatant track record of just like not asking and always being shocked and then like, when she finds out about someone and then when she does, I think, cause she feels so bad that she never actually asked or found out that she turns it around and is like, oh, you never brought them up before. You're just bringing this up.

We saw it with Nanny Kay. We saw it here with Merce. We saw it with, there was like definitely like two other things like that. The brother, at least her antipope brother, when he died from suicide. By the way, now this is sort of dark, but I, I actually am curious. And this is not coming from a shady place.

This is actually from a, like a genuine place. I am actually very curious if Kyle, she went through a terrible tragedy, terrible, terrible tragedy. I wonder if she looks back on that season where they essentially drove Lisa off the show and has a different perspective on it now. Knowing what Lisa was probably going through at that time. I really do wonder about that.

I'm not saying this from a place to shame Kyle. It's from a place of like genuine curiosity. I wonder if there's a different perspective on it from her now. I don't know. Sorry, I got dark there. But the other thing is this. I'm really sick of Kyle's performative hugs too.

I really, like she did this during Eagle Woman and she doesn't now suns doing her thing. And of course, Kyle is the one who runs in front of the whole group to hug Sutton because she is the super friend. And it's not a genuine hug. It is a hug to be like, I'm hugging you publicly to show what a good friend I am. And therefore I expect something down the line.

From friendship. Well, um, there she goes, you know, but, you know, thankfully she got some worse than her hair. So I feel like that made a big difference. A wide spectrum of thoughts, a wide spectrum of thoughts on Kyle for me. I mean, some of that Kyle's still, thoughts a wide spectrum of thoughts on cow for me I mean, I'm very serious and I'll tell you know So Carl and that carl is actually had a good couple of episodes, but we just want to remind you don't be fooled I think she's actually had largely a good season believe it or not

She has annoyed me, but I think that like this has been like There have been many times where it's been pretty good, yeah, I agree with you. Yeah, yeah. Okay, so let's see. So Erica is like, just the idea of getting mercy by math like, I don't know this math, I don't wanna taste this math. So they're all laughing about it, you know, and then Trevor's like, goodbye, ladies, goodbye.

I'll miss y'all, think of you often, please. Let me live on in your heart, goodbye. It was the first time on this show that I ever saw a human being cross dissolve into emptiness. I was like, wow, he literally just had his own final cut transition out of the scene. It's like he just disappeared. My soul has been released. I can finally be walking in Devon with Mars.

He's back to haunt the cave. He does like the he does like the end of ghost thing. Sort of whips goes, ditto. So Trevor leaves. OK, so now it's time for flower releases. And so they all say things they want to let go of. Garcelle wants to let go of feeling lonely because she has abandonment issues not having a dad in her life. And she tells us that her dad left when she was three. And he didn't come back into her life until she was 14.

So then she had the man of her dreams and then she got betrayed by him. And so, you know, men. I didn't know that. I was fucking telling you. You know what? It's been four seasons of Garcelle, I think, four or five seasons.

I did not know that was her back. So we're just kidding. She talks about it every episode. I know it very, very well. Which part? Very, oh, that Garcell had a husband who thought, it was gonna be the man of her dreams. He cheated on her.

She sent out a mass email. I don't think I knew that much about the father. I don't know about the dad, but I'm like, I love Garcell, but I just feel like I'm ready for new types of Garcell content. Well, I think her best work is her smart assery I feel like I'm ready for like new types of Garcelle content. Well, I'm, I think her best work is her smart assory and the confessionals or even not in the confessionals here, even in real life,

cause she'll do it right to your face, which I really like as well. Garcelle is great in a group setting and she's great in her confessionals and she's great when she is surprised by something. What? But it's more like the personal stories are fine and they're good.

It's just like, I feel like we've been in the same space for a few years now and I'm ready to like move into a different area or just like, I don't know. I don't know. I just want more for Garcelle. I like her so much. I like her so much. I just want more.

I want more. I want more. I want more. We're just restaurant goers. We're not the chefs. So we don't need to tell you how to fix it. We just want it to taste better. You know what I mean? Yeah, we just want some new things on the menu.

Yeah, that's it. So Crystal is crying. And the first thing she says is, my brother. And I was like, OK, well, you two, you know? Well, look, Crystal's trying to bring something new. It's just not very compelling, but she's like, what I want to release is my brother who I guess is releasing me.

I want to release me being mad that my brother released me. I guess I'm released him first. Beachy, Beachy, stupid younger brother. So she's sad because he's moving away. And then Ann Marie is like, oh, I know I have this very confident exterior, but it's cause I'm like a doctor. Well, basically, I mean, not really, but like close enough.

So, um, I just like, I have a lot of work to do because, um, I don't really feel like I'm in a peaceful place for myself or for my family. I just like, I want to be happy. Like, I like that. I like that speech. That to me was like, I like that. I like that speech. That to me was like a solid 8.5. I feel like that was just very general.

I know. General, you know, it would be better. It would be great to feel slightly better. Maybe 1.5 on the scale of better. I'd like to feel better. Hers was written by chat GPT. Oh, chat GPT, what do you say when you have to release something at someone else's ash ceremony,

but you don't really have anything that you really wanna release? Chat GPT is like, got it, here's something you can say. Then she just says it. Yeah. Okay, so then who goes, Derit's like, PTSD! And they're like, okay, okay.

And so Derit's like talking about PK and what an ass PK is, because I mean really talking about insensitive men, wow, that's the epitome. is because I mean really talking about insensitive men, wow, that's the epitome. That's the epistome, that's the epitopastome of, sorry, I'm trying to mix the words pasty and epitome together.

It works better in my head. Pasty, the pastinical. The pastimitome? The pastimitome. The pastimitome. The pastimitome. The pastimitome. A pastimidimmy? The pastim... A pastimidimmy. The pastimidimmy. The pastimidimmy. The pastimidimmy.

The pastimidimmy. The pastimidimmy. The pastimidimmy. The pastimidimmy. That sounds like a new dish we're gonna be serving it. Bookity-bee-boom. The inspiration comes from the testosterone sandwich at Flamenco's.

Tustin in California. So she has just figured out after being married to P.K. what a decade. I mean, how long has she been with fucking P.K.? Did you know they were just married when they got on the show? They hadn't been married for that long. So anyway, her and P.K., she has just finally realized

after all this time that she has to lower her expectations. Hello, you married P.K. You already lowered your expectations. I can't even believe you had half of the title of the book, Great Expectations on that marriage. Like, I wasn't even expectations on there. Well, because he made her think that she could just like have everything her way,

cause he literally just weird Al Yankabect, the Burger King theme song PK have it your way hold the pickles hold the lettuce special orders won't upset us babe you don't have to have mayor on your whopper babe to have it your way. PK have it your way. Okay, so she is going to release expectations of PK into the ocean, which is smart. So then Erica's like, okay, well, I'm here to let this go. In representation of all the hurt the last two and a half years that I feel many of you have contributed to, I've turned a new page in my life, I always knew I would.

So I let my heart, my anger, my disappointment in you bitches go. Oh please. Is she fucking kidding me? Wow. I would like to know when all the victims who died to painkfier diamond earrings would think about that. But they're dead. Okay. I, it was so, it was so self-involved and petty,

but I enjoyed it because I'm in like a, I'm in a, I'm in an enjoying Erica space these days. It was so, I mean, it was so ridiculous. Well, you guys hurt me. I'm going to let Erica space these days. I mean, it was so ridiculous. Well, you guys hurt me, and I'm gonna let go of what you did to me by throwing this in the ocean. By letting go, I mean, I will still,

you know, air Mike Rebenz with the rest of this episode or probably next episode too. Yes, I'm still gonna make this about what a victim I have been the past two seasons and all of this. So Garcell's like, oh, well I'm jarred by what Erica is saying right now. I wish it was my turn to let things go again because I mean to let go of this jar that I've jarred.

Call me preservatives, I've been jarred. Yeah, you can like go multiple things. I think why not? No, I think your turn is over. It's like the talking stick is gone, okay? You know, no letting go of things. This is house wise. We hold on to things.

You don't let go of things. What kind of game is this? No, you just act like you're the supermarket. I'm so sorry. I know I'm at the checkout. I left some emotional debris in aisle three. Mind if I just run and get it real quickly? Oh, actually I just had that removed from my anus

by David, David. Oh, Shadowndor, welcome to our Real House was a Beverly Hills trip. That's a nice crossover, we're expecting it. Well, I was in the neighborhood. I heard that Spain was a great place where you could walk along the beach and not run into any slacks

Well, really all you need to do is take away the s to understand where I've been vacationing recently John Jansen left me for a slide. Oh, is that John Sun down on there in the ocean? Hi Oh, no, it's just a reef. It's Garcels reef. Yeah Oh my god, why is that reef hugging Alexis Bolindo? Well, I've seen it all now. Officially had it. Okay. Well, I'm going to go back to Orange County because I believe there's a chair at Blaminkos that Heather Dubrow has not stolen from me yet.

Listen, I know that this place isn't very into house grooming, but there is a home in Orange County that needs to be clipped. I'll believe you. And I just want Erica Jane to know that if she ever wants to turn around her image I just want to remind her that I start charities. I'll be back in a minute. Commercials, here comes one right now. Okay, so Erica's like, there's a place to make people whole, and it is not the court of law, it is the court of law. This is when she was yelling at them last year. And then they all just kind of look at Erica,

like, do you think we don't have the internet and can't look up this diamond-earing situation in like two seconds? You fucking moron. But they decide to leave it alone because, you know, it's like Ash throwing time. So then Kyle is saying that she feels diff- she wants to let go of her guilt for her friend, Lorraine,

which, you know, I'm gonna not touch. And she's like, you know, and it feels strange to be on this trip with all these women and not to be sharing with them like what's weighing on me so heavily, which is, I don't know if my marriage is going to survive guys, I think everyone is so vulnerable. Ensuring these moments shows that we've come a long, long way. And then they're just hugging. And so now it's time to go shopping again. So Erica and Crystal go off and they actually get ice cream. And Erica's like, well, I'm not interested in shopping.

Also can't really afford anything right now. And Crystal's like, well, I really liked your intention. And I'm sorry I contributed to your pain. And if you would like to say something about how badly you feel about me, because my brother's moving to a different country for half the year, that would be a great time for you to say it, so nothing.

And once she apologizes, Eric is like, it's okay honey, shit happens. It's how you recover. So she's like, you know, I can't believe, well she says I love it when anyone can take a chance to say, hey, sorry I misjudged ya. I appreciate that, cause no one else has, not one single of these women

that these bitches and saddie think this. God damn, Eric. That being said, I'll tell you who I don't like. Miss Judge over there was fucking texting my husband. God, I hate Miss Judges. So, um, Sudden's, then everyone gets in the van. Just some old gossip to bring back. Why not bring, bring back some old.

I had to think about that. Remember, there was the lady judge. Yeah. Why not, you know, play on words. Miss Judge. Oh yeah. It, there was the lady judge. Yeah. Why not, you know, play on words, misjudge. It's ripe for the taking. Why not reference something from three years ago? So they get into their band and they're still talking about

how the ashes are all over them. And so I'm like, well, Mercedon get on me at all. He was known for these great leaps. He just leapt right over me and got all over the girls. It was so good. So now they go over to learn a dance with Manolo. So Sutton's telling us, well, I think we just see clips of them learning the dance or whatever, but they go see Manolo, the tour guide with a guitar, which is my worst nightmare. And, um...

I mean, then... Most people with a guitar are my worst nightmare. Most people with a guitar, and it's not that I hate music. I love music. I just don't like mediocre music shoved in my face constantly. And I feel like that people who know three chords on the guitar are doing that all the time, you know? Like, please don't.

I'm going to say, I think, I don't mind if someone has a guitar if they're part of the band or an orchestra, but if the guitar is a hyphenate, like I'm a John Bejuse employee slash have a guitar, that's going to be a no for me. I'm a tour guide and have a guitar. No. I'm, you know, I'm your, I'm your banker and have a guitar. I don't want a guitar in any place outside of the band, you know, space. Yeah, I want your guitar where you keep your emotional expression in your home.

That's the only place I want those things, you know? I don't want it anywhere else. I actually don't even want it. I support you having emotions. I support you having a guitar, just do it at home. No, I actually don't even want the guitar at home because you know, the worst is when you're at someone's house and they disappear for like three seconds and you're like, where

did they go? And they come back with the guitar and I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I am not here to do a sing-along or to hear you sing. We were having a conversation. Oh yeah, that's true. Okay. So then let's see here. Manolo, blah, blah, blah.

And then they're just talking about dancing. I'm like, oh my God, we're just not all as talented as Erica, but we still can't dance, okay? So then they go back to the house to have their glam squads prepare them for flamenco dinner and Erica is telling Laya, you know her friend ploy. She's like, oh the seaside service. I don't know. It was a little crabby about it all. I mean, I'm here to let go the last two years, which I felt misunderstood and hurt and would I have preferred a moment where everyone sort of sat down and said, hey, you know what? In light of everything we've seen, we really pushed you. And we're sorry, Erica. You are the real victim in Lion's Air Crash, Erica. Hope you get those earrings back, honey. They were just proven to be bought with client funds

that weren't really Tom's money because he stole it, which is why I want those earrings back. Anyway, I'm talking too much, sorry. Please just go read the Bravo document on Instagram to understand this case. You know, earlier Garcell says, we were like ultimately, we were just holding up a mirror to Erica.

And I don't think that she liked what she saw. And the truth is, these were questions that were gonna be asked no matter what. Because it was such a big thing. It was all over the news. Wouldn't Erica have preferred them to ask the questions to her face? That's whole, Erica's whole thing.

Because they were gonna ask the questions no matter what. But she didn't, she didn't like that. Well, they really did hound her about the questions. And I get why she would be upset. Now, as an audience member, you don't get to be upset. You're on a reality show and you're gonna have to talk about, this was massive, massive stuff that was happening. Like she's gonna have to talk about it.

So I get why, I mean, I get why she'd be annoyed, but you know. Of course, whatever. Of course, we get, like, of course, like, I wouldn't want to, if I was embroiled in something like that, I wouldn't want to be, if I was embroiled in something like that, I wouldn't want to be confronted about it, especially not on TV. But it's considering that Erica's whole thing is like,

I'm up front. And then all of a sudden when people are like, well, we'll be up front too. She's like, stop it. It didn't really make sense. Well, but your point about holding up a mirror, you know, I agree with that, but you know, there's nothing less fair than someone holding up a mirror when you're, I agree with that, but you know there's nothing less fair than someone holding up a mirror when you're not ready.

That is so unfair. Like when you're walking and you pass a building that's reflective and you happen to see yourself and you're horrified because you're not prepared, you have to be prepared to look in the mirror so you can stand up straight, tuck your double chin down, you know, do whatever, give yourself your Sheena angle, whatever it is.

Listen, it's horrifying when you just pass a mirror and you don't know, do whatever, give yourself your Sheena angle, whatever it is. Listen. It's horrifying when you just pass a mirror and you don't know, you can't just do that to someone like, oh, and then we held up a mirror to Erica. Well, I'd say, fuck you too. Who does that? Have you ever accidentally turned on the camera on your iPhone when you're looking down?

It's horrifying. Let me tell you something. I learned a long time ago not to look too closely at shiny cars or shiny windows. Because those, like there's a difference between a mirror and a shiny surface because a shiny surface is always the worst. It's like a fun house mirror.

There's never been a flattering car window that I've walked by and be like, hey, there once was a toaster that I had like a good experience with. But aside from that,, it's all rough. And it's, yeah. Yeah, and listen, this isn't me being insecure. I find myself plenty hot when I'm prepared to look at the mirror,

because I look in the mirror like, you know. I love my face on that. You just can't surprise people with that shit. Yeah, I love the way I look directly face on in the mirror. And then yesterday, I did a stupid little video pouring out all the huge amount of water that accumulated from the rains here from my trash bin. And it was like me from the side and I was like, oh, I hate it. Yeah. Nothing is more horrifying than ourselves when we're not prepared to be looked at.

Okay, so back at the house, everyone's having their glam squads. Yeah. Okay. Blah, blah, blah. Erica's complaining to Laya and, um, she's, she didn't get an apology, but she's going to let it go for five minutes. And then Kyle's talking to, uh, her daughters and she's asking who's going to be having dinner with Mauricio. And, um, you know, she's like, because's like, because I'm going through this hard time,

I'm just more sensitive to how Moe is feeling and how the kids are feeling. And now we see some flashbacks of their tortured, their tortured experiences right now where Mauricio wants to talk about something. And she's like, Moe, wait until Porsche walks upstairs. Yeah. And then they gather in the foyer

and Kyle's in the wrong color. They're supposed to be wearing red and Kyle's wearing like pinkish orange, hot pink orange. I'm not really sure what you'd call that color, but she's in it. So they're giving her shit for it. And to read, it's like, well, at least it wasn't the hideous dress she was gonna wear.

Yeah. And yeah, and so I'm like, did you not see the text? You're supposed to dress like the emoji dance lady in the red. So anyway, they were like, whatever, we'll just Photoshop you. So now they get into the van and they, and it's a classic thing. I'm like walking across cobblestones

and jagged surfaces and high heels and it's a classic thing, I'm like walking across cobblestones and jagged surfaces and high heels. And it's like, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. You would think being a woman of the world, I'd be prepared to walk in high heels on biblical cobblestones, but I'm not. And then at one point she actually fell over, which was horrifying, cause the noise that she let out.

Ladies, welcome you all to Chills. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. And then they start talking about husbands, and if, you know, a sudden get a remarry, and should they be trusting their husbands to do paperwork for them? which is kind of skirting around the Erica thing I guess and Sutton's like well, I'm not doing any of that I'm

I'm not gonna get remarried mostly because if I do I'll lose that 300,000 a month. So fuck that But I am gonna take my daughter to Taylor Swift, which is another kind of journey that I really don't think any of us are prepared for. I'm a Swiftie, that's right. Yeah, I love me some Trevor Kulsefad. And so, Erica's like, well my dog and I are gonna go to sleep when we get back and hopefully some man will come over.

That's all I can. Come over and come on then. That's all I care. Come over and come on, man. That's what I want. And then, um, let's see. Anne Marie is talking about, oh my God, but what if you met like the man of your dreams, son? Like that would be crazy. Like what if you were just like bonkers in love?

Like would you get married? No. And then Garstile's like, well, I've just worked so hard. I don't want to give anything up in a divorce. And Kyle's like, um, I've just worked so hard. I don't want to give anything up in a divorce. And Kyle's like, I'm pretty not pretty enough. And Marie's like, but I get, I get that about, but like you don't want to split that with somebody else. Like what if they're like an 8.5?

I mean, that's pretty good, right? I mean, listen, like I'm like totally comfortable being split with the number 17. So I just don't understand what everybody's problem is. America's like, oh yeah well why don't you get married to somebody and fuck them up and leave them with all your problems like my husband did to me. That's the thing, do we know what the paperwork is that we're signing for? Do we know what your partners are really doing? And Kyle's like, don't you just like sign everything? Like Martin, like, like I just signed everything because like, then what do you

say? Like have a lawyer look at this? Like that's too much. See, this is why Kyle, I just don't know if I believe this. Like I'm leaving, though, because why would you come on national TV and talk about how you'll sign anything he gives you if you're really planning on leaving him? He watch he's gonna watch the show Kyle Maybe cuz maybe she wants to dispute something down the line and be like well I didn't know I was just signing any pressure. Oh, that's true. Yeah, see I've been sitting on the house vibes

So let's see here. So Kyle's It's not just basically talking fucking signing papers I don't know. They just keep talking about signing papers. Okay. Sun's like, don't do it. I won't even sign the paper work. But Kyle's on it. So anyway, they arrive at the location

and guess who was on the steps? Fucking Manolo. I can't. Manolo's guitar is up there. Like... I can't, Manolo's guitar is up there like brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr So, so they go into this restaurant, which is like a really big flamenco place and everything because they're going to be doing their flamenco dancing there. And the owner greets them and says how it tells a story about King Alfonso Metz Carmen, a very famous flamenco dancer there. And he calls like, oh my god, like I do not want to perform. I'm like, I don't even know how to do

these dances. I'm like not even drinking anymore. It's not, I don't even know how to do these dances. I'm like, not even drinking anymore. It's not like I even can do like, kind of have some margaritas and get up there and do the splits or anything because I'm not drinking on behalf of the fact that I'm not drinking anymore. So then they- Manolo's like, he goes, he's like,

okay, so do you want to make a toast? The Spanish toast and Doreit just starts to be like, well, as a lady of the world, I can do this in Spanish. So she goes, me, okay, salud, amore, amore, salsa guacamole. He's like, no, no, no, no, repeat after me, okay? Arriba abajo al centro. Arriba abajo al centro. Arriba abajo al centro.

Los Angeles, La Cienica. Los Filis se pulven a pelotard. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Um, so then they go to their table and they order drinks. El Cerrito a tamale. Sorry, so do my toast. And there is like, coca cola, normal. Normal, coca still doing my test. And Doreed's like, Coca-Cola, normal! Normal!

Coca-Cola, por favor! Donde esta Coca-Cola normal? Normal! I learned to spandole when I was in Italy. This is what the accents are a bit mixed here. I love that Doreed even has a fucked up accent in different languages. She changes her fucked up accent. Now she's doing an Italian accent in Spain.

I can't with this. Also, everyone's ordering English and the waiter's English is very excellent. It's like, so what would everyone like to have to drink? And she's like, Coca-Cola normal. It's so offensive when people try to speak your language while you're waiting on them.

When I was a waiter, people would try and do that with me sometimes. I would get so offended. Like, you don't have to just be gay or, it's like the second I come to the tail, they're like, hey girl! Can I have this without gluten, bitch? Like, oh my God.

Geez, you don't have to talk to me in gay slang. It reminds me of the amazing race. It reminds me of the amazing race. They're like how like so many teams no matter what country they're in when they get into a taxi, they would go rapido, rapido, rapido. I'm like, you know, rapido is not the universal word for fast. It's only in Spanish. It could be deduced in other languages. But if you're in China and you're saying rapido, that's just not gonna land the same way. Horrible.

Okay, Kyle is talking, they're talking about their favorite moments of the trip. And Crystal's was watching people make paella cause she cooks things with Miss Lucy online. So in case you guys haven't seen those, go watch them. And then Kyle's like, it was like being by the ocean and just having an honest, real moment. Oh my God, about, about Merce, no, about like being obsessed with shopping.

And not drinking. Yeah. And today was really special. It was, you know, it's, as I said in my toast, You know, it's, as I said in my toast, Guadalajara Tequila, Bamboloni, Bonjour Baguette. Well, it's been a long time since I felt relaxed and good on a trip. I mean, just think about last year's trip. I'm like, uh, what was last year's trip? It meant nothing to anybody else.

And she's like, Aspen girl, I've tried to block an ass, I cry sick. And then we see clips of Aspen, which was crazy, with them grilling her over the $750,000 earrings and Garcelle being like, why don't you just give it back? And Crystal saying, all I care about are the victims, which is me and my brother's relationship. And Erica's like,

I don't give a fuck about anyone, but, but. Ugh. Look, we're not gonna go all Pollyanna and think that everything is fabulous. However, if I were to scale it on a whole, for me it was much more of a positive experience than I've had in a long time By the way, Pollyanna's a real bitch. She never said sorry to me Are we forgetting that Erica was caught setting people up last season

Wasn't it that Erica's team got caught being the leaker of last season when everything was leaking out. Yes, Jack. I like the word, Kyle's like the biggest, the biggest, sorry, Eric is the biggest victim of the season and nobody is bringing up the real shit, Eric. You're still talking about these earrings and people are treating Eric with kid gloves which I really don't understand because they didn't last year so I'm not really sure what's up. So Ann Marie is saying, yeah, but Erica earlier today, you said you were like still upset with everybody and like I haven't watched every moment of the show.

Just kidding. Get mad again. Just do that. Cause like we have literally nothing going on right now. So go ahead. Get mad. Well, the last two years I was in this group. I felt bored and mischaracterized

and very misunderstood. I'm sorry, but these are my confessions, confessions. We'll throw back to 2004 I heard. And quite honestly, the morning when I woke up and my appeal was reversed, and those things will always hurt, okay? So that's what that meant, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, it worked.

Rest. Yeah. And Garcelle says, but you said you didn't trust us. She's like, well, I feel more relaxed, but trust is something. Deterred. Yeah.

Unlike Tom's money. That's what I'm talking about right there, bitch. You see. Anyway, so she feels more relaxed in this group. She's gonna, you know, wait for the trust to build, etc. No, yeah, I can't wait till Erica trusts us all again. That comes with a lot of perks. So then Garcell's like, well, it's something to see how deeply she's been affected by us. And then Sutton is saying she wants a moment to toast Erica. Now some of us didn't receive door invitations to your show like some other people did. And then we see clips of her sending

invitations to her show that are like dancing girls. Yeah and like it's like Erica showing up at Kyle's door and Mikey be like, yes queen, serve invitation. Yes, bitch, it's giving invitation. It's giving lost big ass. But I wanted to congratulate you on your residence residency. Now, I know it's like your literal residence and it's small, but it's still something. You know what I mean? And I think it's important, you know, you may not be an angel yet, but they will be serving wings at your concert.

That's important. And so I guess now as my mother would make me do an elementary school, I had to invite the entire class to my birthday parties. Because sudden, it turns out very quietly, sudden is upset that she didn't get this invitation. By the way, producers, clearly there was a beef that was brewing here and I feel like they were probably trying to focus on like the bonding and the heartache that was going on in this trip

and they just decided to sideline whatever fury Sutton was feeling about this invitation. Excuse me, always air the petty stuff for us. We always want the petty shit. Why would you just like reduce it down to this brief moment before flamenca dancing? Yeah, Erica's always gonna have a problem with Sutton because she's like the older southern lady in Erica's mommy's shoes. She's gonna be constant. It's never gonna end. And I'm gonna love every moment of it. Erica's saying, well, listen, I will say, all right, it's not that you're not invited to my show, but I will say, I do remember how much support there was on Broadway.

Member Wynn set and charted a plane. I mean, you did do that. So thank you for that. Thank you for that. And she goes, that's right. I did. I did get a plane. Just take everyone.

And then we see the plane and Rena being like, ha ha ha ha, it's a plane! Ha ha ha, it's a plane that flies! Blurrr! Hello plane! Hello! It's a plane! It's a plane!

It's super something! How are you? So now the dancers are starting and the flamenco dancing is happening and it's like now the dancers are starting and The flamenco dancing is happening and it's like all very fun and nice And they're all some of the women are kind of like getting hot under the collar About the dancer the flamenco dancer and then Kyle's like oh my god sudden Hostess with a moses are you think that we are gonna be dancing up there? I can't even But they do they dance and it's great.

And Seth gives a monologue where she's like, well, I never thought I would get emotional about these women, but I just love them. We're like sisters, they're like family, cause family, your friends become family. And if you've ever worked at Applebee's, people that you work with at Applebee's are also your family, okay?

And tell your unthera ceremoniously fired for not destined a license plate that was screwed to the very top of a wall that you couldn't even reach at 15 years old. But that's neither here nor there. We're a family. Anyway, when I die, bury me under a pile of onions peels. Anyway, when I died, bury me under a pile of onions peels.

So they do their dance. All the hype about this dance was so ridiculous because it was just them basically doing basic stomping or whatever, and there was a lady up there guiding them. It was essentially the same as when I went to Hawaii and I was pulled up on stage to do hula dancing. And they just are like, now do this, this now do this and you make an ass of yourself and it's caught on video and it lives forever on Instagram. Oh that is great. Horrifying. Okay so back in Beverly Hills I mean no offense I

just I'm putting myself in that position. It was horrible for the craft of hula dancing. It was it was very fun for me it was horrible for the craft of hula dancing. It was, it was very fun for me. It was horrible for the legacy of this cultural. Oh, well, that's good. It was fun for you. I hate stuff like that when people put you on the spot. Like when people like sing karaoke and put your name in, I'm like so embarrassed. But then if I do it, if I want to do it, then I'm a ham. But if somebody else does it, I'm like, oh, it's the most embarrassing thing I've

ever done in my life, mother. Okay, let's go back to Beverly Hills, because this trip was, you know, boring. So then Garcelle gets some designer shoes, she's excited. Erica is at dance practice, and she does the splits. She's like, still got it, man. And DeRete goes by to visit Kyle and talk about marital troubles with Momo. So, Kyle, how are things with you and Moster? M-M-M-M-M-Moster? So I'm just sort of workshopping in your nickname

as it's too late or as your marriage will be over. Moster, Moster! Moster! Or as they would say in Italy, MESTER FAVOR! Mosse Mosse means Samosa! Samosa! Samosterino! And Kyle tells her she's been seeing a therapist and Mo has joined her and D'Reit's telling us, well the truth is, recently one of my best friends seems to be as disconnected as

possible. I just want to be as disconnected as possible I just want to be here for coil I wanted to know that I support her but I will never support spaghetti straps and live that own skint and then we get a flashback of three I love what you said this early this season where she goes well I feel like I'm an afterthought coil well I guess I just have to put your initial on my body for you to actually care. Which is so petty. It's great.

So Kyle's like, well, you know, we never fight. Like we don't get into fights. I mean, if we do, it's like, you know, we get an argument and like it's usually me, but like the bad side of it is that like, you know, you're not communicating, you know? And by you're not communicating, I mean, Marisa is not communicating because I'm obviously communicating because I get into the fights, okay? But like, I guess not communicating, I mean, Marisa is not communicating because I'm obviously communicating because I get the fights, okay?

But like, I guess that's what I'm trying to say is it's all his fault. And you know, it's just like, if something bothers one of us, it's like, we'd rather just be peaceful and just like not deal. And by we, I mean he and like, it's again, Marisa's problems. I'm not even married to Kyle and I want to send her Christian papers. I'm like, so bored. It's like two paragraphs of Kyle talking. I can't. Okay, so then we got a, Dorit, back to Dorit, and she's like, oh, Kyle, you know, I think it might be the Trevelyn. Trevelyn's taken quite a toll on us.

Me and PK, you know what else is taking a toll? Toe! House Cookies. This can really make way down a man's spirit, Kyle. By the way, it's sort of funny with these flashbacks because Kyle's saying how the traveling has really been so hard on them. But like every flashback, cause Marie's just saying,

so I have to go to Portugal, but you guys want to come? We can make it like a fun family thing. She's like, I can't, I don't want to. And it's like, so I have like an event in Beverly Hills tonight, you want to come to the event? I can't, I don't want to do that. So obviously just because he offers it, she's not obligated going to,

one doesn't just go to Portugal, but it's not like he's like just out the door and without like bye, see ya. It's just kind of like it was funny. Well, on the Beverly Hills thing, when he said, are you going to come to this thing? And she was the buying Beverly Hills event. And he's like, yeah, she yeah she's really no I don't want

to go to that it's like seven to eleven gross I mean that's his TV show that's kind of a big deal and he's been on your TV show for ten years now twelve years now I mean come on yeah I mean I don't know and you never know how they're showing things and and obviously I'm. But the clips that they selected for us. I'm not saying that Kyle's. I always made me crazy, but yeah. This one I'm just like, come on man. I'm not saying Kyle's wrong.

I could definitely see that Maruso is more obsessed with the agency than with his family. But the clips that they showed definitely was like Maruso being like, hey, you wanna hang out at my work event? Just like, no. Yeah. So Kyle being like, hey, you want to hang out at my work event? Just like, no. Yeah. So Kyle's like, well, you know, and then I see he's on the phone,

I see him on these calls and he's saying, how worried he is about the agency or something's not going right. Then it takes all of his attention, but I'm like, things aren't going right at home. Where's your attention for that? Why don't I get that same energy? And then she cries

and talks about how supportive she's been. And she's like, and if there's no effort made, we're not going to end up together. We will never survive this. I think that Kyle has actually been profoundly affected, like, understandably by her friend's death. And I think that's really having an impact. I think she really needs Mauricio in a way that she may not have needed him as much before, plus compounded with the fact that like, now her last daughter is sort of becoming more and more independent and Kyle can't sort of pour

all her energy into her children in the same way anymore. I think it's just like a perfect storm for her and that's why this has really happened. I think that's the fundamental issue here. Something else has I've been wondering about because her whole childhood, it was like playing second fiddle, right? It's like, okay, well, Kathy's Kathy, right? She was older and then Kim was a movie star and Kyle was kind of

toiling around the side, you know, driving Kim to school and driving her to auditions when they were kids and stuff like that. And now it's like Kyle and then she had Paris Hilton, you know, driving Kim to school and driving her to auditions when they were kids and stuff like that. And now it's like Kyle and then she had Paris Hilton, you know, it was her knees and she was just always so desperate to be famous. And then now she is famous and like she's a real housewife and her sister got fired. So she's not there and Kathy's not on the show. So, you know, but now her husband gets a TV show. It's like, can she ever just be the most famous one?

But what the hell, man? Now her kids and her husband all have their own show that she's not really a part of. Yeah, it's gotta be annoying. Yeah, and she does have a history of, of kind of pushing back or distancing herself sometimes from the people in her life who are quote unquote

more powerful than she is, you know, Lisa, Lisa Vanderpump, Cathy, probably Kim at a certain point, you know, so that's kind of her own stuff going on there. Yeah. Okay. Well, that was Beverly Hills, everybody. We sure love you. Thank you so much for being here. Go get your tickets for, watch what crappens golden crappy.

Well, it's February 17th, Los Angeles, also streaming online and go vote the links to vote, to get tickets, to get online tickets. Those are all at watchbookcrapins.com. Okay. Sure are. Yeah. Now be prepared, because next time you hear me,

I'm gonna be a man. I'm gonna be some man gonna be some manly man thanks everyone for being here and we'll catch you on the next episode bye yeah yeah yeah watch what crapins would like to thank its premium sponsors ain't no thing like Alison King Ashley Savoni she don't take no bologna Strollin' the park with Caitlyn Clark. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela. Itchels! Erin McNicholas, she don't miss no trickle-us. She's never scary, it's the Green Fairy. Jamie, she has no last namey.

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