Watch What Crappens - #2328 RHOP + Below Deck: Barbie Askew

Episode Date: February 20, 2024

RHOP goes on vacation and then on Below Deck (recap starts at 22:16 minutes) Fraser isn’t playing with Barbie and the Chef has put everyone on an unrequested diet. Is revolt far behind? To watch the video version of this recap and for this week’s Summer House bonus episode, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. And grab tickets for the Netflix is a Joke Fest in LA and our European tour at watchwhatcrappens.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously, but hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap Crappens, a podcast for all that crap we love to talk about on the old Bravo. I'm Ronnie. That's Ben. Hello, Ben. Hi, Ronnie. How's it going? Great. Good to see you, everybody. Welcome. Today we're doing Below Deck and Real Housewives

of Potomac. We're going to open with some Potomac. If you want to skip that, if you're only here for Below Deck, uh, just look in the notes and there will be a time code in theory for you to be able to jump to the Below Deck recap. Unless I forget to put them, which I always do every single time we do this, but it's below deck is coming after that recap. We've been slacking a little bit on Real Housewives of Potomac only because we're not slacking it all in our real lives.

We've been really busy. And Potomac has not been great. It's not been a great season. So instead of like throwing our negativity at it every week and complaining about it, we have been positive by leaving it alone. So you're welcome, consider that a big hug. That is a big hug.

That's, I mean, look, you know, you're sometimes you have to make difficult choices. And we all know it's not just us. Everyone's been talking about that Potomac's had a difficult season. As it turns out, I thought last night's episode was actually pretty fun. I felt like it was like glimmers of hope.

I enjoyed it. Before we get into that though, in case you have missed the big news, we are finally, for the first time ever, bringing our show to Europe. We are doing, for the first time ever, bringing our show to Europe. We are doing a show in London. We're doing a show in Birmingham. Tickets for those shows go on sale tomorrow, which is Wednesday. If you get this Wednesday the 21st. Really excited. Watchacrapins.com. It's going to be a great time. We've been, for years, people have been saying,

please do a show in London. You know, we have a lot of listeners out there. So come one, come all. We are psyched for that. But also not only that, we are really excited. We did, you know, in the midst of all of our crappies madness, we really didn't get to announce very much that we are also going to be part of Netflix as a joke. And we are going to be doing a show in May at the Cucabar lounge, which is owned by our wonderful friend, Katie, who did perform on the Crappies with Walter. And speaking of the Crappies, if you miss the Crappies,

the replay of that is available on moment for the next about two weeks, just under two weeks at this point. So all the links for every single thing will be, if they're not already there, at watchercrapins.com. So go check that out. And we wanna see you in all the places, with all the things. Okay, so let's get to it.

Let's start with a little Real House of the Potomac. So last week, they did a Mother's Day brunch, I believe was the last week's thing, right? Ashley? I think so. It was actually two weeks ago because they took a week off with a Super Bowl, so I'm like a little hazy, but

We did talk about that one. Yeah I'm so last week you're right last week was NECA's party to come unpack me for free. Okay. This lady's really pushing it First of all, hey, you're not funny. You came on the show. You're doing nothing funny. Okay, you're not entertaining me I really like the mom is a witch storyline personally But I will credit Wendy's mother with that instead of you as she's the one submitting shrines names to shrines So I think Wendy's mother not you I don't think you're being very funny and then you have a party where you make everybody come unpack your shit How dare you okay? What's next a Swiffer party? Am I supposed to show up with a Swiffer to clean your fucking house? No. A pool cleaning party? No. How dare? Yeah. We, with the shrine, the shrine fight like continues to live on on this show. So

Nekka and Wendy, they have a sit down and they're like Nekka. I think, I feel like Nekka is, is trying to kind of like, let's move on, can we get to some resolution. And Wendy's just not having it. Nekka is like, you know, your mom submitted, you just submitted my name to her shrine, I don't like this. And Wendy's like, but you called my mom a witch. And it's just funny, cause Wendy is of that like school

of like, did something to you, this person reacts, and now you're mad at their reaction to what you did initially. And so she just will not give up this thing that you call my mom a witch. Obviously no one likes when anyone says anything about anyone's mom, but Nekka says, I apologize for calling your mom the name of a witch.

And I also apologize for calling you a bitch. Nekka threw in a bonus apology that wasn't even asked for. She throws that in and Wendy's like, thank you. But then she brings it up again. You call my mom a witch. You call my mom a witch. Well, I guess the argument is you should never bring the mother into it. Never, never. Well, sorry, your mom's the one who made the call and threatened to submit someone's name to a shrine. So, and by the way, we saw your mom on camera, not even denying it. So Wendy shows up to this meeting completely ice cold. Like Wendy is just not gonna be cool to this chick,

no matter what. I don't know that I really blame her. I think when it gets to the mother thing, I get it. But it's a TV show. And like we've said a zillion times by now, you have to shoot with the people or you have no place on the show. If you don't wanna do the show, get off the show.

Okay, goodbye. So she shows up ice cold and we kind of hear a bit of Nneka's side of this, which is like, she doesn't back down, first of all, which I like. I respect because Wendy's playing it so hard that most of us would probably back down. I would. But Nneka doesn't and she starts kind of crying and she's like, listen, your mom submitted my name to a shrine and everybody knows how serious that is in Nigeria. You know, everybody, you know what it means, which is kind of the first time that no one's laughed off her side of it, because everyone's kind of laughed off her side of it. And these two take it very seriously. It sounds very silly to us in our culture, like you submitted your name to

Australian that's dumb, you know, because it's not, we don't have that, you know. So to us, it sounds really out there, but in that culture, they really believe that and that's a serious thing for her. So I'm kind of glad she got that part in there because I feel like people just blow her side off of this whole thing. So then Wendy's like, well, my mom and sister categorically deny the accusations. No, they don't. Because your mom was just on this show admitting that she called Leba. And she said, they show the clip of that. And she said, I wanted her to know it's hard to make a friend, but it's easy to make an enemy, which I

don't care what culture you're from, that sounds like some Godfather shit right there. Yeah, and when she even said that, we talked about it, like I can see a world in which that's meant not as a threat, like there's a way to contextualize that where it's saying like, hey, don't like being in this fight, it's so much, it's so hard to have a friendship,

like you should have savored this because it's so hard to do it, it's so hard to have a friendship. Like you should savor this cause it's so hard to do it. It's so easy to have an enemy, but the truth is it sounds like a threat. It sounds like a threat and I think it's not unreasonable to interpret it that way. And the mom even says like, well, you know what? I mean, I never submitted her name to a shrine. All I did was submit her name to a shrine and say, you know, like,

keep sleep with one eye open. That's all I did, you know. Yeah. And to be fair, she didn't, I knew you're joking, but she didn't like technically admit to the shrine parts. She just admitted to the, to the making the call and the veiled threat part. But still, so it starts with a Nneka saying, you know, everyone in Nigeria knows how serious that is.

And that's, you know, your in Nigeria knows how serious that is. And that's, you know, your mom's admitted my name to a shrine and she goes, yeah, but you also know the impact of calling someone's mama a witch. Yeah, but your mom was acting like a witch first. So I'm sorry, you don't win. And I don't care that it's your mom. We need to stop pretending like our moms are our babies. Like you're talking about my children.

No, if your mom acted like an asshole, apologize for your mom. Okay. Yeah, that's it. I have to do it all the time. And you know that your mom got involved on some level and it like really bothered this person. She's obviously rattled. Like, Neko looks rattled if you ask me and she looks really bothered, sincerely bothered by it. And again, Neko was having a reaction and said, you know what?

Your mom is a witch. And was it a nice thing to say? No. But Wendy is acting like Nneka started this and she didn't. And let's not forget that Wendy also threw in accusations of Nneka smoking crack. And like Nneka's even like saying,

putting this all to the side, like how could you like say these things? Yeah, so she goes, well, you know the impact of calling someone's mama witch. And she goes, but she submitted my name to a shrine. She submitted my name to shrine. And I'm even willing to put that aside because she submitted my name to a shrine. And she goes, OK, well, can you not say I apologize for calling your mom a witch?

And those allegations are not true. No, because she submitted her name to a shrine. She said it five times. What do you need to hear, Wendy? So she goes, I'm talk, I'm talk talking about you calling my mama witch to her shrine. She said it five times. What do you need to hear, Wendy? So she goes, I'm talking about you calling my mama witch to my face, and you're talking about something that Sears say, which is the difference, which is silly because you're mob admitted

to a veil threat already. So it's like here, it's on camera, they just showed the clip. I know, this is gonna be re-illigated a million times at the reunion. And he called her a crack head to her face as you just pointed out. Yes.

So of course Wendy storms out of the restaurant. Wendy sucks. Wendy flat out sucks. That's it. Wendy's done here. I don't know how Wendy's had this much time on this show but she's humorless. She needs to go out.

Bye. I think this is the end for Wendy too. I think that, I think there is going to be a revamp. Not revamp, I think they're gonna get rid of some people on the show. I think that, I think there is going to be a revamp, not revamp, but I think they're gonna get rid of some, some people on the show. I think Wendy is gonna be one of them because she's just really obstinate on this point. And it's like not an interesting enough,

interesting enough fight to drag it on this long. And ultimately it really is Wendy who is keeping this alive. I know people are blaming NECA for bringing, keeping it alive, but it's Wendy who will, who is not letting this move, move forward. People are mad because culturally it would be nice to see the two outsiders, right? It's like the two Nigerian women. You want to see, you want to see that sisterhood of people standing up for each other and being on each other's side. And when it comes to like someone new coming on the show

and immediately being like well your mom called in and threatened bringing all this stuff all this cultural stuff into it and using it against someone else through their mom like I Can see why people are ruffled by NECA, but what is NECA supposed to do? She gets these calls before she's even on the on the show Yeah threats from somebody and that's a big deal, because she's kind of newer to the DC community, you know? And she's already got people trying to oust her from this community and this and that. And that's not fair because she tried to come on the show.

And so what is she supposed to do? Just stay quiet to make Wendy's mom happy? That's bullshit. That's a bunch of fucking bullshit. And nobody complaining about that would do the same thing. They would not all just bow to Wendy and just let Wendy's family trample all over them for no reason. That's a bunch of crap. Yeah, I feel like Nekka has actually been really set up by this season. Like admittedly, she's not that funny in Confessionals, which is her own fault and her

unpacking party was really lame, but also like was it any more lame than really any of the events that happened this season? Everyone's put on a lame mass event at some point this season, which is why the season has been struggling. And I feel like she just came in and she got stuck in this fight with Wendy, which was exacerbated, if not even spurred on by Ashley, by the way. And I just feel like Neckis sort of has this look on her face like, what did I do to deserve this? I came out on this show and I'm just like getting just like stuck with this Wendy quagmire. I mean, I don't know. I kind of feel bad for Nekka to be honest.

So, I mean, but be funnier. That's my note. So then when Wendy's like, I'm talking about you calling my wit, you're calling my mom a witch to my face. I'm saying your argument is all this nonsense that nobody can prove right and so Nekka's like, okay. Well, then Leva can testify if I mean you guys She hasn't seen this clip, but the mom just said that Leva is like their sister and her child So she's like Leva can testify then she can say what your mom said and Wendy's like on that note

You don't want peace. Goodbye, goodbye. And just gets up and walks off. That's how you know when he's lost. As if she won this. Yeah, but then this. Yeah, that's the sign of losing it actually. When you've run out of things that you can say

and matured, so you just leave and act like you're taking the high road. When you're actually just taking the loser road. The road, you're just taking the road. And so my note here is I kind of love NECA after this. So I guess this thing kind of turned my mind as I watched because I was like good for her for not backing down. And it's like kind of sitting there the winner.

So I see a replacement coming. I just say get you some gays in the glam team to help you with your diary room sessions and you'll be good to go. And that's a great note. She needs some gays. She needs some gays to help her out. And I think also if she just was around gays

I think we'd all be like Like I think we would really like her. She just doesn't she's not really around anyone I mean her sister and her husband and that's it So she doesn't really have much of a life in Potomac yet, I guess another thing that we see in this episode is a Giselle's daughter is finally graduating. This is one of those, and every now and then on The Real Housewives,

there is a family storyline that just drags on. I'm happy for Giselle's daughter. Giselle has three wonderful, wonderful children. I love those girls so much. I'm very proud of them. I don't know how they have managed to get this far with Giselle and What's His Faith? Like they just seem like such great level-headed young women.

But that being said, I'm ready for her to graduate. Like I swear to God, if she's in a cap and gown again, when we get back from the Dominican Republic, I've had it. I can't, like I thought, when is she graduating? When is this over? Yeah, well today, she did it today. This episode, she did it. I know, she did it. You know, it is she graduating? When is this over? Yeah, well, today, she did it today. This episode. I know, she did it.

It is the day. So that happened, let's see. The scene I really liked from this, besides that Nneka and Wendy scene, was this scene where Candice clearly made Chris shoot a scene because he's avoiding shooting this whole season. And the way that they can't even veil how much they hate each other at this point is crazy.

Like these two hate each other, right? But just in my head, but he's, he's all about how much she spends and she's fighting because she wants to get her lymph nodes out. Even though she was told they, they were benign and he's like, why would you waste your money on lymph nodes? And she said, I want to get them cut out. And he's like, why would you spend your, what I'm trying to say, dear?

Like they had a very Shannon and David way of yelling at each other without yelling at each other that I was, it made me a little worried for them. It made me worried about the true, the rumors being true about them. Well, Chris was like, remember last season when you complained that I was not around, that I was working too much?

Remember he goes, remember when I had that job at the rooftop of the W? It's like, yes, we all remember. That job was brought up many times. But he's like, you know, and you complain that I was never around enough. And so now I'm like, I left that job and now I'm around a lot shooting Instagram videos

and they show him like eating a Dorito or something. And he's like, so, and now you're gone. So you made me leave my job or not pursue other jobs. I don't remember if he was fired or if he quit. He's like, I'm now home and now you're gone. So what the hell? You like made me look like a shithead all last season and now I'm here and you don't even care Yeah, which yeah, that could be a problem, but he wants to have a baby

He was talking about the in vitro and he's like we've got some ice cubes So what's going on with that? But she's afraid that the hormones from pregnancy is gonna make This lymph node situation worse. So that's their whole issue Yeah, so this lymph node situation worse. So that's their whole issue. Yeah, so let's see. There was also another fun scene with getting some truth from Ashley for once, which is rare, because Mia went over to talk to her and Mia's like, so what about you guys not being divorced yet?

And Ashley tries deflecting in her normal like, well, we're going to, we're very serious about it. She's like, listen, I get it. I'm married to an old ugly guy too. Me is just like, I got it. Okay. When I talked to him about it, he said, well, we'll probably have an arrangement too, cause it's just easier.

And, uh, Ashley's like, yeah, well, that's it. It is easier cause security does come with that. And I kind of got Ashley to open up and be like, yeah, it is an arrangement. Why would I divorce somebody I have a prenup with instead of continuing to take their money for as long as I fucking can? What are you nuts? Yeah, and she tells the story about how growing up,

like, you know, her mom struggled to make ends meet and she was, there were often like, there were kicked out, kicked to the curb like two or three times, she has memories of actually sitting on the curb with the furniture and her grandma would come by to pick her up, et cetera. So it was like an emotional scene for Ashley. My takeaway from the whole thing was I was surprised

when they were making small talk at the top of the scene that she said, oh yeah, Michael and I used to live in the penthouse at the top of this building. And I was like, wow, I don't know. For some reason that kind of was like, I can't believe Mia and Gordon moved into Michael and Ashley's building. These are my takeaways.

This is what I, this is what I take from these shows. Yeah. If those walls could talk, I would tell them to please be quiet. Yeah. They'd be very loud. They'd be very, they'd be very obnoxious walls. Okay.

They'd be terrible, terrible walls. So then Robin has decided to take everyone to the Dominican Republic and they are going to be staying at and they're bringing Kierna Kierna is like I feel like they've been sort of trying to make Kierna happen all season like they sort of insert her in random places and I'm like is she a friend of is she not a friend of where do we stand with her what's going on with her so it seems like she's now an official friend of because she's on the cast trip and They're going to a resort called was it Casa Casita Campo Campo Campo to Casita Campo to Casa Casa to Campo and Karen in the bus is like well

You know Ray goes here every single year and the first time when Ray went down, I was on the magic sauce and I called him up and a woman answered. And she was like a dramatic reenactment. It was like a phone answering and everything. And she was like, yeah, she said she was the maid of what made answers to the phone. I've never heard of such a thing. I didn't really write down a whole lot of this.

This was their vacation stuff starting. I did write that this chick really has not made a splash at all and then this time unfortunately she gets sick so she's taking from her room a lot. So it's not looking great for her. Yeah, the, this poor girl, she finally gets on the trip. She gets her first interview of the entire season and her whole interview is to explain

why she had the shits. They're like, okay, Kierna, welcome. Okay, I'm so glad you got all dressed up. Okay, here's your first question. What's going on with your diarrhea? She was like, um, yeah, so I had champagne and it like exacerbated my ulcer and I just didn't want to make a mess on the plane.

And so I just really needed to go to the bathroom. And they just like show her running across the lobby and her stomach like making those noises. And I was like, oh man, this sucks for her. They're really doing her dirty too. Yeah, well, what are you gonna do? and her stomach like making those noises. And I was like, oh man, this sucks for her. They're really doing her dirty too. Yeah, well, what are you gonna do? So that's pretty much that, right?

I mean, Robin and Karen are kind of fighting because Karen has to share a room for the first time ever which you mentioned and that was, so that was my favorite part was that Karen was like, the rest of it was just sort of like shady shit. So basically Robin says, you know, like, well there's like four single rooms and three doubles. So she makes Karen have a double room.

And Karen of course is not happy about it. So she tries to get her own and she's like, oh no, I'm just gonna throw some bendiments at her. I'm gonna throw some bendiments. I need to have a view. It's very important for me to have a view. I'm like, well, but Ashley's offering your room. So well, I don't know. I need to have a view because I'm claustrophobic. If I don to have a view. It's very important for me to have a view. I'm like, well, but Ashley's offering your room. So, well, I don't know, I need to have a view

because I'm claustrophobic. If I don't have a view of the ocean, I'm gonna, the walls were closing on me and I'm gonna die. So, she needs a view because she's claustrophobic. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, played by HBO's Industries,

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Rosa Parks, Reconstruction, MLK, February Black History Mom. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories of Black History that we just are not really talking about or thinking about, especially outside of February. And we are about to flip the script on all of that. Because on this show, you're going to hear a little less In August 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue and a little bit more.

She is a heroine to some as a fighter for black rights. She is a villain to others. Follow Black History for Real on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere on February 5th or you can listen early and ad free on Wondery Plus starting January 29th. Join Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. So then Giselle, of course Giselle is likes to take any opportunity to poke a Karen. So she decides, since Karen was shading Nekka about Nekka, remember Karen was saying, oh, so this house, this is actually North Potomac, is it not? This is North Potomac. She's like, no, this is proper Potomac. So Potomac, but in the northern part of it. This is basically Arkansas, right? She's like, no, it's Potomac. So to shade Karen back

Giselle gives Neca a sash and a crown and says the the real grandam of Potomac says Karen is only a renter And so Karen of course gets mad. She tries to laugh it off But she she gets mad but then the one who gets angriest of all is Candice who of course makes it about her. She storms off because she doesn't want to take part in anything that this, what should call it like an impetuous imp or something like that. She was like, I don't want to take part in all this woman just lids to take people down and I don't want to take part of it. So Candice storms off. It's like to be continued. Well, Candice, will she ever be able to get over the fact that Giselle gave a gag, sash and crown to NECA? I don't know.

We'll have to wait till next week. Yeah. I, that was, um, something that sash ceremony. So that was real housewives of Potomac, everybody. I think next week, did they say next week as the season finale? No, they didn't know because they just started their trip. So I think next week, did they say next week as the season finale? No, they didn't. No, because they just started their trip. So, but next week they did show a preview of them playing a table game.

So everyone get excited for that. Everyone get excited. I personally enjoyed the squabbling about the rooms. I was surprised how much I enjoyed that. And I actually was surprised how much I enjoyed the sash ceremony because it was so stupid, but I was definitely chuckling. So then I was really sad when I saw the preview ceremony because it was so stupid, but I was definitely chuckling. So then I was really sad when I saw the preview

for next week was back to table games. I was like, oh no, but we made progress. Oh well. Okay, so here we go. We are now into Below Deck, episode three of season 11, adventure. So have an adventure, but not an adventure. Big adventure.

So, big episode here. So now Fraser is, well, I guess previously just, it doesn't matter, previously he cares. A bunch of weirdo swingers were on the boat. So we start with Fraser, everybody, I still have to write down everybody's name. Although I feel like I remember everybody's name on this one. I don't know why. But yeah, the names are not a problem for me. It's the faces because to me, Barbie, Barbie, Zandy and Sunny,

first of all, their names all sort of sound the same and they all look the same. And so I really have to like take a moment to be like, okay, which one's talking now Who is there was this I still need like a few more episodes before I can tell them apart yeah, well Barbie cat and Fraser are still having their service meeting where Fraser is forcing the girls to confront each other so we can just all get along like the family that we all So they're having that and cat didn't let it go and continued on to start with Barbie. So Barbie's like, you said that you needed to move because we're supposed to be working and I was working.

She goes, I did not say that. She goes, I don't lie, I don't lie. I'll tell you that much. And he's like, guys, guys, let's take a breath. This is not going where I wanted it to go. I'm gonna, okay, you know what? I'm gonna work on my delivery with you, you stupid fucking bitch.

She's like, okay, come on, can we just hog it out and pretend we never had to fight in the first place? Okay, now go finish the last bits and bobs. Thanks girls, see we never fought, everything is good. And Barbie's like, I'm so sick of that girl. She's gonna talk shit about me and not own it. I'm sick of being nice. And by the way, I've been nice.

That was me being nice. That's like you have not own it. I'm sick of being nice. And by the way, I've been nice. That was me being nice. That's like you have not been nice. Kat is definitely very, very sensitive, but you have not been nice. I don't think she's the worst though, Barbie. She's not the worst. Barbie just wants the jobs done. I like that kind of meanness when people are like, do a better job, you know? I don't like the kind of meanness when people are just like bullying to be bullies, but I feel like she's been somewhat nice You know, but that really I don't think she's been somewhat nice. I think she's been Very dismissive like one cat was doing a task and she's like, um, can you do this for me? Okay fine fine fine

So like I can see also Either way whether she's been nice or not Fraser says she has not been nice. I just I didn't mean to say that she's whether she's been nice or not, Fraser says- She has not been nice. I just, I didn't mean to say that she's been nice. Whether she's been mean or only lightly mean, Fraser's like, change your delivery, like change your attitude, because obviously cat is a sort of person that responds with different kind of feedback.

So cat's like- Well, also I love that Fraser is so busy about it. As we go on through the show, he's like, be nice. And he does the whole like girls, darlings, sweethearts, babies, you know? It's like PK is leading a team of women, you know? I know, I actually was, I really am enjoying season three Fraser.

I feel like he's now finally ascended to like the chief stew, like the exasperated chief stew that he always could have been. Right? Like last season, I think he was trying to be like friends. He's even said that he tried to be friends. He tried to do much. This season he's just like over it. And he's just like, he's in scolding mode right away, which I think is really good for him. Yeah. So he's definitely good at the scolding part. You know, now that he's more confident in his scolding

He's you know last year is a little afraid to scold but this year. He's not at all He's like you two darlings will get a spanky on your butting tinks if you don't sit down right now So they both call each other a bitch behind each other's backs and then we cut to Zandi and cat talking and Poor Zandi is just this whole episode, she's just following Kat around training her and Kat just doesn't, she counts a little slow to get things. And then the other running plot line that I love keeps coming back

is that Zandi can't stop gulping. Did you notice it this week? I did not notice the gulping. They just keep cutting to Zandi gulping stuff. I don't really know if, I think we've got a dehydration story coming soon. You did mention this last week, right? Yeah. And it was a whole episode again. Nope, no, no, it was the drinking. Was Zandi,

the cat is the one who hides, who hides and eats. Yes. But Zandi is the one who drinks, she's always drinking a lot and they stop the music. Like it's, it's not just me being like, oh, that girl drinks a lot of water. They keep stopping the music to putting gulping sounds while she drinks. It's weird. Yeah, well, yeah, you could be right.

They could be setting up that she's gonna like faint at one point. Like I'm just a little, I think I'm dehydrated. So I guess there now it's time to get ready to go out to get in the buses and the vans, all that fun stuff, drinking, fun times, yada, yada, yada. Okay, so they start talking about tattoos and Barbie's got four.

And Anthony doesn't have any. He's like, when my dad passed away, I thought I will do a tattoo of Dada. He died of heart attack and it's going to be tough so I want to do tattoo of my father. And Frédéric's like I'm so so sorry to hear that so so sorry. And then we go to the restaurant and they do a cheers to the first charter and son he's like oh in French we say $$$$$$$os j'entends, which means smell my ass. Mantham is like, that means smell my ass. She's like, I know.

So good, so good. So they order and then Ben of course is turning to Sonny and he's like, you look great. And she's like, oh, compliment returned. Like, oh God, Ben, I really can't stand him. So then Barbie turns the phraser and goes, so yeah, so here's my path. I lived in Uruguay and Mexico and China

and I grew up with three nannies. One would cook, one would clean and one would do my hair. And they surprisingly don't really have much of a reaction to that. I would have thought phraser in a, in like a confessional would say, she's absolutely disgusting for someone to have three nannies and to look at that foul that is

a triumph in reverse. Yeah I think probably because she said it ten times because she has the exact same line that she told us the audience when she was like I'm a girl with three maids one cut one clean what did my hair I think that's just her thing like she thinks that that makes her look really cool when in fact it makes her look like her dad hates her. Honestly. It's like, what did you do in this great life to end up being a maid with the rest of us? You know, but. So Barbie's like, um, guys, you know, that Fraser has a unicorn tramp stamp because yes, a unicorn jumping up a rainbow. And Jared of course goes of course goes oh yeah man that's my daughter's favorite thing she lives in Alaska it's like is it the unicorn is it the rainbow

or is the tramp stamp what is your daughter's favorite thing I know why her favorite thing is a unicorn that can fly because she's stuck in fucking Alaska and she just wants to get the hell out of there okay you fucking monster so Fraser's like well where do you live then he goes I'm for a lot of down listen I've never met her. I mean, long story short, I was in a relationship and we were fighting more than we were laughing. You know how that goes. And she ended up getting pregnant. So was it when you were fighting? Was it when you were laughing? I need more. Exactly. He's like, yeah, I didn't know this. And I wasn't know this

and I wasn't committed to her. So she got pregnant and fucked off to Alaska and that's where she's from. His story, I wonder, I would like to hear her story of it also, because she's like, yeah, she ended up getting pregnant and I wasn't committed to her and so then she fucked off to Alaska.

I'm like, the fact that he sort of like asserted that part, I wasn't committed to her. I was like, was there, there was more of this wasn't there. Was there like a little bit of a, I want to take this relationship to the next level. By the way, I'm pregnant and he was like, well, we're not in a relationship. So I don't know.

I don't know. For some reason I feel like there's more to this story than his, this quick little timeline that he gave us. Yeah. And Fraser said, and there was no communication. He's like, no, for a year. I got in touch and You know now for like for two years or wait now for a year two days a week Finally, she said I love you my daughter cuz like I get to faith. Okay, wait

He says something about he said he gets to FaceTime his daughter two times a week But for the first year he didn't get to talk to her at all He didn't get to talk to her. I think he didn't know about the baby. And then he finally got in touch and then they talked two days a week and then only recently she, the baby, the girl, the daughter, whatever, I don't know how old she is. She's 18. She finally said, I love you. She's like a lawyer in Cleveland now.

It's over a matter, bro. I don't know. It's so hard. Yeah. He's like, yeah, she finally said, I know I love you, you know, cause the last thing I want to be is like a deadbeat dad, you know, Captain Curry just burst it. Let me tell that story again and how I dropped everything to beat my children. What did you do for your children? Uh, yeah. Stayed in Fort Lauderdale. Yeah.

Yeah. Steven Fort Lauderdale. Yeah. And Barbie's like, oh, that's so sad. And Fred goes, that was an amazing story. I guess I'll save the flying unicorn out of a rainbow for another day. I guess we don't have to hear the tragic backstory behind my optimistic tattoo.

We'll just stick to go. Secret frozen baby wins that round, I guess. Secret Janine Turner baby type. What's called baby wins another round. Congratulations to your palin baby. Maybe next time I can start telling the story about my tattoo and you can interrupt with tales of a moose your child once saw.

Maybe your daughter will one day grow up to be able to pull for voting and march 19 miles in the snow from one house to another in Alaska. I can't wait to hear how your daughter can see Russia out her back window. So I have no Alaska jokes. You love that? I had to go, wow, the neighbors must be really far from each other. That's what I'm talking about.

I worked in the Alaska realm personally. I already went to Northern exposure. I was like, I don't know how many other Northern exposure references I can make. I was like, Janine Turner is like my limit. So then. Yeah, I'm not pretty quickly there. And then, so now meanwhile, Captain Kerry is talking

to his girlfriend, their face timing, and he's like, it's important for me to make quality time. This is good, this is good, honey. You know what this is when I'm with you, things just taste better, even though I'm not really with you, I'm just FaceTiming you. But when I FaceTime you, food tastes better. So there we go. You know, if someone called me Face face timing and eating right in my face,

I would hang up on them. That's like the thing I hate the most is people eating my face. It's so rude. I would divorce him in two seconds. So he's like, oh, my wife is from Turkey. And I adore her. Also adore Turkey. Both of them make me just want to cuddle and bed after. or Turkey, both of them make me just want a cuddle in bed after. Her name is Ganol and it's the picture. They show a picture of the two of them and he's cocking his head back in front of a rainbow. So it looks like the rainbow's coming out of his mouth. So he can't carry.

I'm gonna ask for a hand in marriage from my mother and the way I'm gonna do it is I'm learning Turkish. All right. I'm not single. Sorry ladies. So far the only thing I've learned how to say is I can sue in Jennifer Aiden but you know, I start to start. So now the crew goes out and dances after dinner and Ben and Sonny are really trying to make this chemistry happen. And it's not really. And so she's like, yeah, I'm in paradise with a hot guy and he's got his hands on my hips.

I'm not expecting anything, but I'm definitely thinking of something. Sorry, mom. He's gonna hold you, which means smell my ass, mama. Is he a hot guy or is he just a guy because I feel like Ben his hotness I feel like for these women just comes out of like just Process of elimination like there's no one left. There's like they got three options. It's gotta be Ben, right?

Yeah, they've got three options one of them is Jared Ben, right? Yeah. They've got three options. One of them is Jared and the other one's running around, make it, talking about how he got a scar on his ass from burning the coat hanger into it. I mean, the other ones gay. Yeah. So, so it's just like Ben's the last one standing. Yeah. So now we have, um, uh, Jared's talking to Barbie and he's like, come on, hug me for real.

And she hugs him. And then we go over to the beach and Kyle is there. And he's like, he's like, oh, Barbie, she's the kind of girl that'll take home to mom. And Fridge goes, oh, you really, really like it, don't you? What is it about her? Is it a terrible personality?

Is that like a Scottish thing that they like that? Is it her magic marker eyebrows? What is it? Is it her compelling stories about nannies she was raised with? Is it a maid having a maid? Is that what it is? Do you enjoy a girl who brings her own fitted sheets around and then hands them up to the pool when they don't fit on the mattress she bought them for. Is it turning you on when someone can't size a fitted sheet? He's actually like, yes, actually to all those things. He's like, boner, boner town. So Kat is alone just kind of going through her purse and the music stops and then it cuts to everyone dancing.

And then just to be dex, they cut back to her again and stopped the music again. It was probably just like a totally normal moment. she just like hold on guys I need to get something on my purse and sits down and gets it but they edit it to look like she's just in her own world and no one's hanging out with her and no one likes her and she's just she's a stupid person doesn't even know how to find the things that are in her own goddamn bag. Yeah and they come over to her and they're leaving she's like oh okay I was just looking for something in my bag did the music just stop?

The entire music and the entire club stopped. That's crazy. They're like, well, Zandi had to go up something. It'll come back in a second. So they get back into the bands and Barb, Barbie and Jared are talking. And she's like, I found that conversation with you very, very interesting. And he's like, yeah, I don't know you from a can of pay, but what about like I look into your eyes like,

I find truth. That's what I found in there. She's like, oh, okay, Jared. He's like, why are you laughing? Why are you laughing at me? That was a cheesy ass line. So then we have, we have some music that's playing. It's going,

money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money. Is that what the music was going? Money, money, money. Yeah, because now in Below Deck, they've put lyrics to their songs, which is really bothering me. But now the music, yeah, it's like, money, money. We got money, I got money, you got money, money, money.

And then silence and then. Zandy is just drinking more and more. And then someone wrapping about money while Frazier complains that he spent 300 fucking dollars. I love that they play a song about money while we're watching like the poor people who are like the downstairs to the upstairs guests. Like, yeah, we're watching them about to go to bed in their sardine can.

So they have to sleep on top of each other. And I know before they have to spend the next 48 hours waiting on strangers hand and foot. So most of Fraser goes to bed, but most of them party in the hot tub and Sandy's dancing on the edge of the hot tub and falls in. Yeah. I love Sandy. I love Zandi.

I'm really enjoying her quite a bit. She is like, she's like a good stew, but she's also a mess a little bit, which is really good. And Kyle tells us, she's like, oh Zandi is pissed as a fart. You know, like if you fart, it goes everywhere, right? So she's pissed, she's drunken everywhere, like a fart is.

You know? Like, okay, well, maybe I have to work on that one. She's pissed, she's drunk and everywhere like a fart is, you know? Okay, well, maybe I have to work on that one. So Sonny texts Ben in bed, she's like, can you give me a kiss? He's like, oh yeah, I can, meet in the cabins. So he goes peeing, he's like, oh yeah.

I know. And then he goes into her cabin and they like make out. She's like, I'm shy, are you? He's like, yeah. And then he goes into her cabin and they like make out. She's like, I'm shy, are you? He's like, yeah. And then they start making out. Yeah, they kissy. And then the next day, Jared's like, okay, today, I need to calm down, I need to breathe.

And then he needs to make sure that my daughter still hasn't found out that I've been to my bank account. Yeah, okay. You don't get the keys to the kingdom with one I love you. See that much. Then Ben and Kyle are talking and Kyle's like, I think I'm in love with Barbie.

I'm like, what? Where did this come from? Did you, have you guys talked yet? Well, I made out with Sonny last night. He's like, that's what's your one thing? Good for good on you, boy. He's like, well, I don't know what's gonna be like working with her though.

So then, candy is in bed, just cat cat is in bed just watching, uh, Zandy cat and Zandy is going to be a problem. Let's see now. Cat is in bed watching Zandy go to the bathroom. That was very important to get in there. I guess. Yeah. Well, it sets the scene and cat tells us, you know, on boats, I worked on in the past, I get really close with my crew, but it's like hard to connect with these people and I just, I feel super alone and it sucks. I'm like, okay, so you got two episodes left. Kat, Kat does not

have much time left. We get her back, her tragic backstory in like 10 minutes. So they're cramming it all in because she's gonna be gone or after this charter. Yeah. Kat's like, wow, that girl went PNG, didn't even say hi to me first. Nobody likes me here. Okay, so now it is um, this is my favorite song. Salt Lake City music. It's like, music. It's like, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh. And then we see this extreme closeup of Captain Kerry making an espresso. You know, last week we talked about how it seemed like he always had like a little espresso cup and now they're like, Oh, we're going to lean into it. And it's like, it's not even like a espresso machine with a tampon. He's, it is just a curig.

It's literally putting a cup under a curig and pressing a button. And they make this seem like Alexis commercial. I was like, what is happening here? Yeah, like the choir music's going crazy and then it stops and we just get a as espresso just kind of plops into the cup. And that was a majestic scene. So Jared comes in and the captain compliments him. He's like, whoa, I did a walk around the

boat and it seemed like no one was even there and sure it's like yes because I was up at six making sure it looked like that for you because good job mate you know why you did that because you it's your deck you know what you're on when you've got a deck an adventure good on you Jared you know he's dropped the ball but I feel like he's stepping up and I'm happy where we are right now. And soon, he may even get a tiny little coffee cup just from me. So now it's the interior meeting in the Skyland

and Barbie's last two voice from last night. And he's like, all right, so for this charter, girls, lovely things, I'm gonna mix things up. I'm gonna have Kat on housekeeping, Xande on service, and Barbie, I'm gonna have you helping out in between. That's my passive aggressive way of saying I hate you and all three of your nannies. And if you'd like to know about the story about my unicorn jumping over a rainbow, feel free to ask. No? All right, noted, noted. Okay. So then, um, Ben is sunny or chatting and, um, he's like, Oh, so

last night you wanted to pick. Remember that when you asked me for a peak? She goes, Hmm. Yeah. I missed a little affection a and Ben's like affection or attention. I was like, excuse you. You're trying to make out with us a man. Don't, don't, don don't color basically a thirst trap Yeah, and she calls them out, but they're like just playing around. You know, it's like a third. It's like their vibe

Yeah, and Ben's like oh bean bean bean. You said you weren't gonna jump into something and hear y'all jumping into something Wow, you bad boy. I really I'm so sick of this fuck boy line. Well, how many times do we have to see Carl say this? How many times do we have to hear Gary say this? Everyone always does this like, oh no, I said I wasn't going to, but here I am again. I'm like, you're the one who's starting this. You're the one who's instigating. He's just so gross and so smarmy.

So the preference sheet meeting, cat, cat's in there and Fraser cat passes her. He's like, how are you cat? And she's like, I'm okay. He's like, all right then. Good. He passes by her cat's that person. He's like, I guess I'm okay. He's like, all right then, good. He just passes by her. Kat's that person who's like, I guess I'm fine. So you have to be like, tell me about it, Kat.

Let's talk about feelings right now, Kat. Oh God, I have to do a preference sheet meeting with a sad American in the next room. How terrible for me. So they all sit down and we find out the guests that are coming on board. We have Tara, who was a successful event planner, and Steven is a successful contractor,

and they both love normal-sized coffee cups. Does everyone know that? So it's a couples' trip. One couple is gonna have a vow ceremony, like a vow renewal, and then I think two other couples want some kind of ceremony, it's like a commitment ceremony, some kind of shit. You're just all going to have to be a pain in the ass on one trip.

Yeah, basically. This is all about our couple, because we're couples. I think that two of them are getting bad renewals and one of them is getting married. So what that really means is that one of them is getting married and two of them are getting divorced in about three months. Yeah, pretty much the bravo curse. So then the captain is gonna officiate and you know typical below deck stuff. We're gonna have a surf and turf night, a whole old Hollywood dinner. They want a wedding cake. Oh the wedding cake really freaks people out. So

now Fraser calls Kat to the Sun Deck because she needs more. You know, it's like it's quite evident that Kat is a sensitive, sensitive girl. And I feel like she needs to be heard more. And I've never had someone look after me in the scary industry. So I want to be that for her. So cat, how'd you pronounce your last name? And she's like, bar, blah, blah, like blah, like blah, but it's ba. I made it up.

All right, well, I feel like there's going to be a very sad story happening right now. So why don't you just get it out? So Kat tells a story about how her dad died and then her mom died and she wound up in foster care and she was in the system. And when she was in the system, the family that she lived with was actually sort of

in a cult, the family that she lived with was actually sort of in a cult, like a religious cult, and they cut off, she was separated from her brother, which is so cruel by the way, and that the family cut off contact with the brother because the brother was not in the cult, and so she couldn't talk, and then she also grew up in Yorba Linda, which is, I don't know, for some reason, it's just like strange to think like she grew, she was stuck in a cult in Yorba Linda. And basically she was, it was terrible.

And when she turned 18, she reconnected with her brother. And now they're really, really close. But this whole thing made her feel like really insecure. And she like ruined her, her self-confidence because she always had to be super perfect. because she always had to be super perfect and she never seemed to be super perfect, all that stuff. You know what else Yorba Linda is, it was in that TV show, The Blue Zone on Netflix, that documentary about the healthiest

people in the world. That was one of the blue zones. And it, one of the reasons they say they're so healthy is because they're so religious and they believe in community and charity and being healthy because of the community. And I don't know, I assumed it was Christianity. They showed a bunch of churches, but fucking Yorba Linda, man. Wow. Yeah.

So Kat, was, you sure? Was she in a cult and raised terribly? Yes. Does she probably not have any life threatening diseases right now because of it? Yeah, so where's your thank you card to your Belinda? Okay, where is it? Wow.

Wow, so yeah, that was a very sad story for Kat. But when she told that story, I was like, okay, so she really only has an episode left. Cause that's what they do. They'll make sure they get that sob story in before they're gone. And Fraser's just trying to show that sensitivity is so cute because he just doesn't seem like he really has it.

But he's trying to like, you know, be a real boy. And so he's like, oh, that was such a good story. Thank you so much for sharing that. So they teach you to fold in your Belinda. You're actually decent at that. So now they finish up their work, it's bedtime, Well, Linda, you're actually decent at that. So now they finish up their work, it's bedtime, and now it's the morning, and the captain's walking around the galley,

and he's like, oh, look at this, this looks, looks, feels clean, and yeah, good job, Anthony, you're really ramping it up. Or as they say in Turkish, I actually don't know, I haven't gotten that lesson yet. I was hoping that maybe you knew the Turkish words, but you don't, so I'm just gonna walk on out of the kitchen now.

Then outside, while provisions are coming, Jared is doing dips on the railing. Is that gotta get in and where you can? Actually, I heard that last time I dropped change around my pocket outside my daughter's room. So, it's pretty funny. All right. Anyway, let's get these provisions in guys.

And it's 15 minutes till the guests arrive and cats checking the bathroom. And she thinks it's perfect. And then we see Barbie vacuuming the couch. And then Zandi's like, Fraser, do you want me to, do you want me to redo the cabins? And he's like, what's wrong with the cabins? And he's like, oh no, this is not acceptable. We cannot do this, not acceptable.

We need to meet in the master now, interior, interior. Emergency towel meeting. Emergency towel meeting, dun, dun, dun. So it's like. Just when I complimented Yorba Linda on their towel prowess. Girls, I know it's fast, but when we do something, we do it completely and we do it well. I have higher standards and they're not met.

And this is not how we roll a towel and certainly not a towel in the master. This is unacceptable and you all know it. I'm changing everything around. Kat, you need to pick up with Zandi. Zandi, you're back on housekeeping. Bobby, still a bitch. Now we need to up our

standards. Okay. And it was like, they cut it like, I feel like this was actually a commercial cut. They're like, look at this towel. You don't have towels like this. And he like holds like a, he puts up like a little hand towel that's folded in some way that's improper and like cuts to commercial like, Oh my God, not the towel. So then, um, Sunny and banner still doing their really awkward flirting outside. And she's like, oh, do you use banana sunscreen? I guess that's what I can taste. It's like, wow, this is like the chemistry. This is so hot. You're melting me. I'm melted. So Kat and Fraser. so he's understanding that she's overwhelmed and then he talks

about his own traumatic story. He says that the first day he was the crew to the stew, which meant he was just the bottom boy bitch basically. And on his first day, the chief engineer found out he was gay and he was super homophobic and as Fraser was watching dishes in the kitchen, he came in and poured the boiling hot tea all over his hand and Fraser just stuck it up and was like, one day I will have a higher rank than him

and I would have him fired. And one day I did. That is wild. That is crazy. I can't get that is so I can't believe you're firing him murder him. I needed that to end with and now he's dead and no one can figure out why. Whoops.

Wow. Yeah, seriously. Let's do that. Let's let's salt burn that situation there. Although I guess the salt burner like trying to aspire to something bigger and better. So I guess I'm burning you're like trying to aspire to something bigger and better. So, um, guess we're live in one era. And so everyone's checking the Frigio checking work. It's like, okay, Bobby question, not question statement. Be extra sensitive with cat this trip. She goes, sorry. Okay, fine. Sorry. I'm terrible. Just take a note, Barbie.

Yeah. But also like she already said sorry and they moved past it. So I get why she's kind of annoyed with him that harping on it still cause Fraser just does not like her. Like he's just giving her shit, I think. I don't think it's unreasonable for Fraser to say, just be nicer to cat.

Cause he's basic cats is a more sensitive person. Like you have to find ways to work with people that you're working with. And he's saying, just be more sensitive to her. And she's like, sorry, I'm terrible. Which is not what he was saying at all. But she then takes it to a place where he's like, what the fuck?

Like I didn't say that. Now you're making it sound like I'm coming at you. I'm just saying be more sensitive to her. Well, she definitely shouldn't be yapping back, that's for sure. Because he's like, I'm talking about the last trip right now. I don't need to hear that slap back babe. And she goes, yes, sir, yes, sir. He's like, thank you.

So she walks off pulling a frasier where she's just muttering to herself about him. And she's like, oh my god, like what the fuck? Like here's the thing with me. I don't have a filter. You know what else does it? Dirty water. And I'm not going to drink it. So don't have a filter. You know what else doesn't dirty water and I'm not going to drink it. So don't ask me to swallow you

if you're not going to be filtered. It's not my responsibility to like be okay with you not having a filter. Fuck off with that. Yeah, I also say that. I love Barbie being so mad and offended that she has to change her tone for cat because cat's really sensitive.

When Barbie is the one being the most sensitive in the situation right now and she is the one who later on asked for Frazier to change his tone with her. I love that. I love that one time and she's like, oh, fine. I guess I'm terrible. I guess I'm terrible. It's like, babe, it's a note.

It's a note, babe. So then we cut to the captain practicing Turkish and then Kyle is naked looking. What's the word for adventure? Kyle's look is naked looking for his boxers. And, you know, there's like captain carries like there's a tag that's hanging out this cupboard everyone's come on. We got got spruced up these people coming up on this book before they get divorced Basically, it's just work work work work work. It's a lot of work stuff

Yeah, work work work and then the the guests come okay, and well, let's welcome Tara and Steven Okay, and so he's giving them a tour and Fraser's like this is the deck head and the guys like it And then you've got us these dickheads. Oh, sorry. I'm that guy. I'm that guy. These guests seem fun, a bit tacky, but fun, you know, to put American.

And the guest is the one going, oh my god, is that nacho cheese? Yeah. Like, then Barb is like, I hear we love cheese. And the lady goes, yeah, we're very, very, and I'm not cheese. She goes, I hear we love cheese. And the lady goes, yeah, we're very, very, and I'm not cheese, she goes, I hear we love Cheez-Its. She goes, yeah, we're very, very fancy. They're like obsessed with Cheez-Its.

Oh, I thought she said cheez-Its, like different cheez-Its. No, she just wants Cheez-Its. Okay. So then, yeah, cause she does say that later, right? Where she's like, you guys, my personality is loving Cheez-Its. Bringing Cheez-its back. Yeah.

Okay, and it almost worked because I was in the grocery store and I was like, cheez-its, and I was like, you don't eat cheez-its. Leave them on the shelf, sir. We are a better Cheddar's household personally. I'm a Cheddar cheese, just eat the cheese. Just eat the cheese. That's what I say.

So then the captain is having a little meeting with the Deccys and he's like, get your shit together, check your shirt, mate. All I need distance is cold. And dun, dun, dun. And he says, I see a quality team here. Overall, listen, Rome wasn't built in a day. Yeah, but I don't think we need like the,

I don't think we need like the, like the scaffolds running the, the Rome yacht, you know what I'm saying? I think I want to know. I don't think I want to know. It might have not been built in a day, but it was like burnt down in a week. You know what I mean? You should worry more about how it got burnt down with this crew. So now everyone, the guests are like talking about how they're going to renew their vows

and everything and talk about their kind of party and like committing and all that stuff. So this one lady is like, hey, can I get a margarita? And Barbie's like, oh my God, I'm gonna make you one of my magical margaritas. The thing that makes it magical, it's invisible. You're not gonna see it for quite some time. I've had two weeks of schooling.

So this is gonna blow your fucking mind. You just wait, okay? So she goes to make it and Fraser's like, so let's have a talk about Marguerite consistency. And she's like, okay, well, I do like a one count, then a four count, then a six count, then a salt rim, then a six count, then a four count, then a three. He's like, no. That sounds lovely. But let's try lime, quantro, tequila done. Yeah, but you need a splash of orange. That's just how it's made.

I'm like, lady, what part of quantra does not sound like a splash of orange? That's the orange. That's literally the orange. He goes, I wouldn't say that's classic. And also that's a great food, darling. She's all your grapefruit. She's big defensive and squeezing a fucking grapefruit.

Can't. So one of the guests is worried about getting sick and then one of the ladies just isn't getting to Margarita because of all this Margarita drama. And she's like, well, I'm still waiting for this Barbie magical Margarita thing. Well, I don't know if that's gonna happen. So Barbie's like, yeah, he's telling me

there's no orange juice in a Margarita. So I'm like, honey, let me show you something And so she does she was sort of big recipe binder that she stole from the fucking online Like class that she took for two weeks. So now she's more obsessed improving that she's right about the splash of orange juice Which I'm sure is lovely, but you're already are using Quantro So go for it. So she's doing this taking more more time, and so Fraser walks by and she goes, so look at this, it's like literally this. This is like a recipe, look at this recipe for a margarine. He's like, what is that darling?

Is that a diary? I mean, make your fucking drink, okay? Put your oranges away. What are you trying to do? Why are you trying to squeeze juice out of a can of shaving cream? That's shaving cream, darling. It's not even an orange.

Yeah. And the guests are still like, where's my drink? Where's my drink? Where's my drink? So Zambi is doing the lunch table and the lady's been like, I've been without a drink for like 30 minutes now. And Fraser's like, okay, cat, do you know how to do margherita?

I want it in less than 30 seconds, please. So she's like, okay, yeah, I agree. Like that's how long it should take. And Barbie's like, he has such a deck. I'm like five minutes from losing control, five minutes, sink on me, Joe. That's a lot faster than it took to make the margarita, by the way.

I was like rageful watching the scene. How does it take you over 20 minutes to make a margarita for a guest? And then she has the audacity to act like she's bothered by the situation. Yeah so then the anchor comes down and Anthony fries some chicken and he's telling us this story is like oh when I was a kid my mother was making cold on blue I was bad at school so I went to culinary school I don't dream about Ferrari I only dream about taking care of my mother this is

all I need. Okay, there's something wrong with this person. I know. I know. This is like kind of the thing we were talking about earlier with yoga teachers on the traders. Like when people are too forward facing with what a good person they are, something's going on.

Right. And so far, whenever someone's like, I don't need a Ferrari, I just need to know my mommy's okay. Okay, you're a murderer. There, I said it. I'm calling it now. He's done something very, very bad in his past. Also another cliche story.

We already had the Bosun who has a child in some far-flung state, which is very classic. And now we have, once again, the chef who says, I wasn't good at school, but cooking, cooking saved me. I found my passion with cooking. I was living in the gutter, dropped good at school, but cooking, cooking saved me. I found my passion with cooking. I was living in the gutter, dropped out of school, doing drugs, and then I found cooking. Even my heroin did cocaine.

And then I found the culinary school of Pasadena. I know, it's always that story. You know what, I wasn't good at school. We know you're a chef. Yes, I've literally never heard of a chef coming in who's like, you know what? I was a straight A student and now I'm a chef. So after I left Vassar, I decided, you know what? I want to be a chef. We don't hear that story.

It's always like ever since I left that prison close to Vassar. I know. I've been cooking. Ever since I got hooked on crack at Vassar. I wasn't a student there. I just would always go on the campus and do crack. Then I said, you know what? I want to be a chef.

So then Zandi is setting the table asking Kat for help and Kat doesn't even know how to do silverware. Like she's like, okay, but I'm going to have to ask you what side the fork goes on and what side the spoon goes on. Like, oh no You know what on your flight down to Granada Like maybe just do like just go on YouTube and be like how do I set a table just do some like basic research Can you just do that before you go on to TV and humiliate yourself? Yeah

Okay, so she's dropping stuff and Zandi is running low on patience basically. She's like, I haven't found a right crystal for patience, but Stannix works. So now Anthony, he makes this like food, he makes this chicken and he, it's like the chicken's for the crew and so it's down there in the crew mess.

And so we're just starting to see see as everything's happening, we're starting to see the deck hands, of course, go in and gobble everything up. And of course, Ben is going in for like seconds and thirds. Yeah. Made the fuel. That's what they say a lot. So Fraser is talking to Barbie and he's like, dull, we just need, um, we just need some ice chilling, some wine chilling or whatever.

And she just ignores him and the stress violence start to play And he's like darling, please don't ignore me. Could you acknowledge that I spoke and she's like Yes, sir Yes, sir like she wants like highlight how much like he's the boss and she is a peon and she's enforcing this role She's not even having a voice anymore. It's darling. Yes, sir. Do you know that you're giving attitude right now?

I mean, you're literally just like stabbing at me. It's like, oh, I'm not trying to do it like that. It's why I'm saying darling a lot. And girl, things like that, you know, non-condescending things. I love that he said, we need some wine chilling. You're just stabbing at me now. You're just stabbing.

Trying to bleed me out. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha But if you cannot compose yourself, then you have no place here. And if she doesn't learn quickly, I'll be filtering her out of my crew. Filter call back. So Barbie is like... I'm calling back something that's not even something I said in the first place, which is actually pretty amazing. I've taken ownership of it now. And Barbie goes, I don't know what else to say. She goes, noted, noted, which

is British gay for get the fuck out of my face. Yes. So she walks off, mutting, I'm so sick of him. He's such a dick. So then Fraser comes to pick up some food and the guests are like, there's one of the guests is having an issue with the sliding doors, Like his arm almost gets chopped off by it. And then now we see some of the food is arriving. A very small Greek salad. It's like in a little cup. And they're like, oh, that's nice.

And while the guests are eating, the crew is continuing to just like stop their face with all the food. Even though you can clearly see how much food is there for the entire boat, they are just going in and going hard. Yeah. So Ben's like, I need more food. I'm starving. But one of the guys is like, wow, we absolutely love this.

Tell the chef we hated it though, so we can fuck with his emotions. So then Jared is telling Ben to go on a boat. And so Ben's like, well, Jared seems to have picked up his game a little bit, but I don't know. We'll see how long that lasts, especially after I undermine him on the radio in about two minutes. So then the captain comes to the mass and she's like, well, there was lunch, exactly there.

It's like, there was lunch, but there's no more chicken. Do you want this piece? And he's like, no, you can eat it. You need the fuel. You know what would have made this salad better? She goes, what? And goes, chicken. But don't feel bad that you took less piece of chicken when all of the

captain was actually driving this boat and sitting here chicken lists. What was they saying? Turkey chicken list. Bencha. Every word he learns in Turkish is just a-bentya. A-bentya. So now the guests are doing like speed sailing or para-skiing or jet boat ski, boating, cycling, whatever. So Barbie now comes down to the mess for food and she wants more chicken and she wants some chicken. She hasn't had any and Sandy's like, no, I ate the last piece

in front of the captain though. And as Fraser eating, he's like, no, but I'll eat when I take a break. But there's no food to eat. What is this fucking chef doing? Like, he can't even get through two people. He couldn't even feed two people. I was livid.

I have to say, so while I was watching this, I was watching this episode and like, we had just finished doing the crappies. So I was just sort of like in this state of like, I was just sort of like, just a little bit more, like just sort of like, I was like releasing, I was like watching, I was trying to take it all in. And then when this happened, I was so wide awake and so alert, I was, because I was so mad.

I was like, I can't believe those fucking deck hands. Once again, the deck hands, they come, they act like they have at the hardest when the stews are the ones running around this boat and then they eat all that food. Cause I think we've both been in that situation where someone eats the food that's meant for everyone, but you're the one who's on a task

and no one leaves you any food. I was literally out of my mind. Yeah, this guy's not gonna last. If you can't feed your crew, you're not gonna last. So Fraser is talking to himself in the mirror and he's like, I'm not mean to her, I'm not condescending, I'm just putting the correct amount of pressure on my girls. So I'm doing mirror, mirror on the wall.

Who's the least of a girl? The more, me. So now it's time to start decorating for dinner. And Fraser's helping Barbie decorate. And Fraser goes, Bobby, I don't mean to put you down. She goes, yeah, but I just feel like you don't appreciate me.

Like today I'm like working my ass off and you're like, let's worry about people's feelings. And I'm like, that's literally what you're asking for right now, Barbie. Yeah, I just look like your parents right now. You literally said, literally said, I don't appreciate me, but now you're complaining that he want that you're that, that she's been asked to consider people's feelings when you're complaining about being appreciated. It's like, well, that's your paranoia.

All right. It's not how I think about you. And I will not accept how you respond to me and how you ignore me. And she's like, uh, whatever. He's like, you're not treating me phenomenal. Oh no, she says, you're not treating me phenomenal. Like you treat me like I'm this bitch. And he goes, well, you were a bitch to me.

Dun dun dun. Now here's the thing. You're supposed to kind of bugging me with phrases stuff. I don't think you can talk to people like that. Like I get that he's gay. And so he's being like, well, I'm gay. So I'm just saying like, and by the way, I'm not gonna stop saying girl and Darling and stuff like that. But I think if you're friends with people, that's one thing

But I think when you're the boss you can't be like girls My little darlings and like you're a bitch to me. I don't think you can do that. I think like you still have to Yeah, when he said that I thought to myself it probably is not Professional to say well, probably is not professional to say, well, you're a bitch to me. He probably could have used some better language. But I did think it was funny because it kind of like, turned the tables on her.

She's like, you know, like, she's like, you bitching. It was funny, yeah. Well, it was funny, but the way that she straightened up and was like, um, yeah. Like the way that she just dropped all of her drama and did that, I was like, uh-oh, I hope that she doesn't see this as like a point that she can grab onto, you know, to victimize herself.

Cause she's already like, oh my God, I can't believe you're treating me like this. Yeah. And so he goes, he's like, no, you have an attitude with me and you're being rude towards me and I don't like working with that. She goes, okay, fair enough. I'll work on my attitude, but I'm not like happy. It's like, okay, well, we care, he's the boss.

Yeah. So he's like, okay, well, I'm sorry, that's the case. And I hope that changes. She goes, me too. He's like, and I don't like the way that looks, to be honest. What you're doing, she's doing like a little football decoration. And she goes, yeah, it looks awful. This does look fucking terrible.

I admit it. So now it's nighttime and Kyle's looking for some radio and Anthony's cooking and it's going to be like Anthony's saying tonight's dinner is going to be like steakhouse and all that stuff. And people are people are sort of like milling around. Someone's lifting weights or no, no one's lifting weights. Someone lifts up lifts up Fraser like he's lifting weights or no, no one's lifting weights. Someone lifts up, lifts up Fraser like he's lifting weights. He's just like Fraser's like, oh, this is, this is quite fun.

A big burly tacky American treating me like a piece of dry spaghetti. I don't know if I'm a rouser, disgusted or both. So the captain is still kind of lurking around the crew mess going, is anybody eating? Uh, it's terrible, not enough food. We need the fuel. You eating? We need the fuel.

Where's they saying adventure? Turkey adventure, adventure turkey. Sorry, messed that one up, you got it. I'm sure I've repeated it 20 times today. If anyone needs some fuel, I've got some in an espresso cup. Just kidding, it's for me. Adventure.

So then Fraser comes to the dinner table and like the Foot Locker rough outfit and blows a whistle because tonight's theme is the car park. Okay, are we gonna ever get non-white trash guests? Because so far you're two for two, so come on. This is the flagship below deck. I don't wanna just watch white trash in a rat. Is every freaking boat ride gonna be a discount

Tour yes, the answer is yes So then phrase so the first thing that they are served is a reinvented French onion soup, which by the way is just a French onion soup with the Greer Couton on the side. I don't know if it's really reinvented. It's just Grier Crouton on the side. I don't know if it's really reinvented. It's just presented deconstructed maybe so that I love I'm like I love these points Why do I get like hung up on this bullshit? I'm like, I can't believe the croutons on the outside. They're saying it's reinvented It's like totally not reinvented at all. If we didn't below deck recoups would be two minutes. It's like Two maids fucked and then another maid got drunk and another maid got bad as the other maid. The end, bye.

But the chef took the crouton out of the bowl and put it on the side. Yeah. So Zandi and Kat are talking about men that they wanna bang. Zandi wants a Viking. And then the guests are talking about how they're gonna do commitment ceremonies.

And Zandi asked Kat her type and Kat's just like, I just want someone to make me laugh. I just haven't had genuine banter yet, but I guess I haven't really spent a lot of times with the guys yet either. I did find some gum at the bottom of my purse though. That was something. More food comes and this one guy is like,

hey guys, if you wanna know what medium rare looks like, bam, this is just the way it is. Medium rare right here. But then the burly guy is like, yeah bro, but I can't chew it. I've had a lot of filets and this is some chewy shit. Yeah, I think it's a little too raw when people can't chew through it. So someone asks for the most dreaded, this has got to be a chef's most dreaded request.

Can I have some A1 sauce? Ouch. How's that specific chewiness, by the way? So I guess just mask the fact that it's not cooked at all. It's like granted meat. I can't believe nobody got sick. So Barbie goes and tells Anthony, he's like, you cannot blame me for not having quality meat.

We are in a small island. Then don't serve them that, serve them something else. Yes, exactly, work with local ingredients, sir. Yeah. So then the lady is like, oh my God, I want some Cheez-Its with wine, keeping it classy, you know? And Zandy is, meanwhile, Zandy is sort of

ordering cat around to the rooms and she's like, come on, like you gotta, like you gotta wipe this, you gotta make it clean. And Cat tells us that like growing up with trauma has left her very insecure, which is why she can't fold towels properly. I guess, yeah. And Xandia's like, wait a minute, why is this towel folded like crucifix? Do redo it. Sorry, trauma.

So now the night's ending and Ben is encouraging Kyle to hit on Barbie because they're both on dates tonight. So then one of the guests is telling a joke. He's like, what do you call a fish with no eyes? You call it a fshhh. I laughed. I didn't get it until I saw it. I spelled that know what. I fshh. I laughed. I didn't get it until I saw it. I spelled that right now.

It's like, oh, doesn't have an I. I think I've heard it before and I laughed then and then when I heard it again this time, I laughed again. I love a stupid joke like that. Like, what did zero say to eight? Oh, what? Nice belt.

Did you hear about the antennas who got married? No. The wedding was okay, but the reception was amazing. Okay, so um, friend. Did you hear about the one about the reinvented onion soup? It was stupid. Sorry, there was no punchline there. Just rage. So the captain goes to the shop and he's like, listen, I know you're striving for perfection,

but we need fuel, all right? We are people, people need fuel, you understand? And he goes, I would not disappoint you again, captain. I give you my word. I dress up like your mother and inspire you. So then, so now, um, the Frasier, thanks Barbie. Frasier goes to sleep and he's like, he's like, thank you, Bobby. Thank you for everything.

And then he talks to himself. It's our favorite supporting character. Frasier's personal, I you, Bobby. Thank you for everything. And then he talks to himself. It's our favorite supporting character, Frasier's personal, I mean, alternate self. And he's like, I don't like it. I don't like the way she is. So Kyle and Barbie are up alone. So he's like, put her on the cataloger. So they just sit down and talk.

I love that Barbie does not give a fuck. She sits down all the time just to have a good conversation. She does. So they talk about how old they are. He's 27, or she's 27, he's 28. He's a tourist. She's a Virgo and a virgin. He's like, that's a load of bullock-sad.

I was gonna say a load of STDs, y'all, I reckon. Oh, this guy's so romantic. I love courtship. So now it's the morning and everyone's working, waking up, working. And Sonny's driving a Seadoo, the jet ski, something another. And Jared's like, hey, hey, Sonny, hey, hey, hey,

hey, don't ever go out without a jacket. Always make sure you plug in this thing. You gotta always do that. So then Ben, he's like, hi, hi, Ben, Ben, Ben, Jared, just want you to know, Sonny was, she didn't have a safety jacket on, a life jacket on, and she didn't plug in, just wanna announce that's the entire boat, everyone. Everybody got it.

He's like, yeah, I already addressed that mate. Okay. And so now Sonny's pissed. She's like, I'm so annoyed that Ben would get over the radio and say that. Thanks a lot for making me look stupid, okay. And so now Sonny's pissed. She's like, I'm so annoyed that Ben would get over the radio and say that. Thanks a lot for making me look stupid, Ben. Yeah, and she's totally right.

It was not his place to do that. And it was totally like a brown-nosing thing. He knew the captain was listening. Ben is such a fucking underminer. Yeah, he really is. Hopefully Captain Kerry is smart enough to see this. And then he's like, oh, look at Ben. That was good.

Ben pointed something out. So now Sonny's pissed. So then meanwhile, up on the, up on the, on the deck, Ben is Ben's there with Sonny and he's like, hi. And she's like, hi. She like doesn't say anything. Oh, she's certainly chilly. Yeah. She just ignores him. And then the captain is talking to Fraser and Fraser Tattletales he's like we need to have a chat. I'm dealing with a lot of snapbacks that are quite hostile and attitude from Barbie It's like oh, I don't know. I don't love this. He's now he's not going to listen the other way I think Barbie's not great. Okay, but I think it's too soon to jump where the fiery gun

I agree great, okay, but I think it's too soon to jump on the fiery gun. I agree. I think Barbie is pretty bad and this conversation will be happening, but I think that Fraser is now trying to be like so on top of it with captains that he's maybe going like jumping the gun on this one because he's like, we had an incident on the first charter. She was a bit harsh with one of the other girls and our request has all been nice to Kat and now she thinks we're all against her. And I said, that's not the case. However, you've been vile to me." Yeah, and he's also retelling this story really wrongly. He's sounding like a drama queen, you know? Like I can guarantee you any boss is not gonna want to hear and then she did and then she was mean and then like

she's like really rude ass. Like nobody wants to hear that. You need to like have more solid reasons when you're coming to a captain than she was vile to me. You know? And so he's like, well, and that's what I've come to captain. I'm a very kind caring person, but I've said my piece to be quite frank with you. And now I'm done with this.

So that's the cliffhanger. What's gonna happen? I mean, we, I think we all know a captain cares. I say, all right, I understand, I understand what you're going through. But you know what? I think the problem here is that none of you have had enough fuel. So let's have some fuel and let's see,

let's check back in on this situation. This is a fuel issue. 100%, it's gonna be that. All right, everybody. Thank you so much for being with us, for both of these gorgeous shows today. We will be back later this week. We've got a big week coming up.

We've got Southern Hospitality bonus. We've got below, not below deck. Summer house is starting this week. We're finishing out Beverly Hills in Miami. Just a ton going on. So keep with us, go get your tickets for our European tour. And our Netflix is, Netflix is a joke comedy festival and you can also

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