Watch What Crappens - #2330 PumpRules, Part 1: Did It For The Graham

Episode Date: February 21, 2024

*This is part 1 of a two part recapThe cast grapples with whether or not to show grace to Tom Sandoval after Lisa makes an impassioned plea on behalf of his mental health. Plus, James throws his first pool party and later receives a heartwarming surprise. And grab tickets for the Netflix is a Joke Fest in LA and our European tour at watchwhatcrappens.com Watch this recap as a video and get our bonus episodes on Patreon!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously, but hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch Our Crappins, the podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the one and only Mr. Ronnie Kerm. Hi Ronnie, how are you?

Hi, what's going on with ya? Not much, just you know, here we are midweek, it's Phantom Pump Rules Day, arguably one of the biggest days of the week for us, especially this week where there's a giant cover story in the New York Times about Tom Sandoval followed by a giant story about Tom Sandoval interview magazine. So this world is, this world is fucking over. I'm sorry. It's like, are we even making an effort to like maintain a world? Why are you guys writing fucking cover stories about Tom Sandoval?

What a loser. Okay. What a loser. What a life. Get a life. It's been a rough day for me. You know, I mean, I was out there in the world earlier. I mean, it was like the LA riots out there. What happened? I'm just kidding.

It's just these are, this quote from Tom Sandoval is so fucking disgusting. I can't believe it. Like comparing his basic ass existence to George Floyd. And can you believe it? I mean, I can believe it actually. Of course. And you know who else could believe it?

The people who wrote the article, they could fucking believe it. Because when it got to this part in the article, you know what, finish your intro and I'll go into this article. Well, yeah, let's look at, there's a little teaser. It's just my overall note.

We need to just stop writing fucking articles about Tom Sandoval. And what are you guys having? Who's that famous photographer for Vanity Fair? Annie Leibowitz. What are we having? Annie Leibowitz do the photographs now? Why are you giving him fucking artistic photos worthy of the lube?

Exactly. That was actually the thing that offended me. That actually offended me so much because it's like it is giving, because you know in those moments while he's taking that those photos even though he's saying this bullshit he's like dude I look sick in that photo man that was like a sick photo shoot. They're giving him rock star presents for what? For being a fucking loser and cheating on his fight? I mean even beyond the being a fucking loser part I mean even beyond the cheating on his fucking girlfriend part what did he do to get in the New York Times magazine?

Have some self-respect over there for Christ's sake. I know. Um, and, uh, by the way, didn't even ask us for a quote. So like I totally got a little shot at. Oh God. Imagine speaking to Tom Sandoval levels. Ego maniacal. We're like, why are we in that?

The day of the New York Times actually comes to us for a quote, that will be, that will be, that will be a thing. So anyway, the time is near. If Tom Sandoval's in the New York Times magazine, it was good enough for us then, two years ago at least. I mean, if we're getting, yeah. Well, that's what my mom always, my mom is always like, well, Ben, you know, New York Times is slowly coming around to reality TV.

They just wrote something about what is this? Scandival, I guess. Um, so here is the news, everyone. We actually have news to announce today. Big news, double big news. We have added a show to our European tour in case you didn't already see on our social media, we're going to Dublin. We are going to Dublin. We have added a show to our European tour in case you didn't already see on our social media.

We're going to Dublin. We are going to Dublin. So now we have three shows. It looks like it's only going to be three shows. It's going to be London, Dublin, and Birmingham. Those are all going to be at the end of May for this year. The tickets, I'm so sorry, we said the tickets go on sale today, which is sort of true. The tickets really go on sale on Friday, but there's a Patreon pre-sale that already started this morning.

And that's for all three cities. So if you are there in that corner of Europe, or if you just want to visit that corner of Europe, come join us there. We'll be there. It's going to be great. The show in London is actually part of a comedy festival. There's all sorts of comedians that'll be there at performing. So like come for us, stay for everyone else. I don't know. But it'll be it'll be so fun.

Some people have been asking if we have a show in Glasgow, which would have been. That would have just been a dream. But unfortunately, we could not make Scotland work out on this trip, which of course we want Scotland to work out because all we do have to we can say. So unfortunately, man there. So unfortunately, no Glasgow, I'm sorry, but we do have Dublin and London and Birmingham and it's gonna be fabulous. Tickets at watchrockrappens.com.

That was the announcement. Also go get your tickets for the Netflix as a comedy festival that is in May as well. You can find that at Watchrockrappens. Also this is a video recap and we do bonus episodes every week on Patreon, so go catch those over there. Okay, let's get into this. Well, you want to talk about that article? You want to talk about this New York Times article? So, I was saying before, I haven't actually sat down to read it yet because I am very much like Kyle Richards and this was an article that was in the New York Times

magazine section, which means it's like a sit down and read this article. And honestly, I'm a busy person. And also honestly, do I need to have a sit down and read moment about Tom Sandoval? I'm not sure that I really do. What else do I need to learn? What nuance is the New York Times gonna tell me

that I have not already been able to discern for myself I will read it, but that's gonna be a weekend project for me. So but did you check it out? I Did now as far as reading the whole thing listen, this is very New York Timesy. It's very verbose Okay, it goes on and on and on and it explains what reality TV is to smart people, you know Because smart people read their New York Times in theory. They do not watch Vanderpump Rules So it's kind of a condescending article in a way because it's like this is what reality TV is and this is what Reality TV is like they did it in a way because it's like, this is what reality TV is. And this is what reality TV is like. They did it in a very interesting way.

I felt like they kind of wrote it like a reality TV show article, which was interesting, you know, and they had one of Tom Tom's PR people who I think from, they were calling it someone from Tom's PR team from reading this and just knowing Bravo as we do, I'm thinking this was someone who works at Bravo, who was there to kind of stop Tom. Because either that or someone on piccolo in his band. Right. Some high school kid that is getting paid in Cheetos and stage time, you know, and bus tickets to Poughkeepsie or wherever the fuck they're performing. Poughkeepsie.

You know and bus tickets to pick up see wherever the fuck. They're. Performing. These guys pick up see. So yeah, there's someone there because after he makes this a comment about George Floyd and all this other stuff, the network starts calling. So there's a couple of comments to Riley. Who is this person, this PR person furiously writing comments

throughout the interview. But basically, every time you fast forward through this article to a Tom quote, it is just an absolutely douchebag comment, like every single time. You know, he'd grown apart from her, blah, blah, blah. I just needed to get away from the show. I just wanted to not feel watched. I just needed to get away from the show. I just wanted to not feel watched. I just wanted to take a breath. Oh, really? That's why he went on stage for the band

that's literally called the Most Extras. You just didn't want to be watched. I get it, I get it. Yeah. So let's see. Let me just get to the quote, shall we? Well, I was about to say, let's actually, for anyone who's been living under a rock or just somehow was lucky enough to miss this,

there was this quote that really went viral yesterday, which honestly, I was also very upset about because I felt like yesterday was our moment in the sun because we were getting attention for the fact that Heather Gay unfollowed us, which you can hear about on Crappy Hour. Go listen to that. And I was like, okay, well, you know what? This is our moment in the sun. And then here comes Tom Sandoval to ruin our low level gossipy story. Our moment in the sun. That's so sad. I know. Real housewife won't follow us. Wow. us. Wow. Okay. So this was the quote. So I asked Sandoval why he thought the scandal got so big. And he said, I'm not a pop culture historian, really. But I witnessed the OJ Simpson thing and George Floyd and all these big things, which is really weird to compare to this, I think. But do you think in a weird way, it's a little bit the same? No, Tom.

No, Tom, it's not the fucking same. So the writer says, I looked over at Riley who was typing furiously on her phone. I think I knew what he meant. He was trying to express the oddity of becoming the symbolic center of a nationwide discussion and a major news story, when he communicated instead with something more honest, which is just how much the experience had made him lose

perspective. Which is such a, I love that such a passive aggressive classic New York times this. And it's also just trying to make something so much smarter out of what it actually is. It's like God forbid you just called this person a lump of shit. You know what I mean? Like the writer should have been like, and that's when I started

questioning what I'm doing with my life and when did this fucking newspaper turn into this? And why did I ever care to work at this fucking dump? You know, that I would be sitting here across this piece of shit as an assignment, but instead they're like waxing poetic about how deep what he said probably really was, you know, I mean, I loved it to me. That was just like, that's classic New York Times shade. That's how New York Times shades people. I thought, yeah, it was such a wild quote. He could have gotten away with maybe comparing it

to OJ Simpson, but when you bring George Floyd into it, it's like, are you like, George Floyd was not some sort of tabloid curiosity. George Floyd was like a person who died. Well, I mean, technically, no, Jay Simpson, that happened too. But a person died and caused worldwide protests and a lot of true reckoning, not reality reckoning. And so for him to elevate himself to that moment is so vanglorious. It's so typical sand of all, but it's like not even like, can't be hilarious. I mean, elevate yourself to like Lorraine and Bob it for crying out loud, but you're not you're not George Floyd. Let get over yourself, sir. That is, it was so, it was so tone deaf. So typically Tom sand ball. It's amazing how this guy continues to keep

shooting himself in the foot. And honestly, all he has to do right now is be quiet because like we've said a million times, the audience is ready to turn on Ariana. We already had a lot of people comment, we know, because she won Bravo Liberty of the Year in the Crappies. A lot of people say, oh, really? So getting cheated on just makes you Bravo Liberty of the Year. We got a lot of that energy out there, which is so obnoxious. And all he has to do is just sit there.

And yet he is like, no, I want people to still hate me. Come hate me. Yeah, well, he just doesn't know. I mean, the guy's just dumb as a fucking brick. You know what I mean? And that's the, you know, that goes back to that old saying that you see spray painted all over Los Angeles, stop making stupid people famous.

This is what you get. You know what I mean? This is what you get. So this was my favorite part of the article. This is after this. It says, the next day, I was supposed to attend the taping of one of Sandoval's confessional interviews for the show. I was about to get in my car when I received a text from his publicist, Riley's boss. He'd rather you don't attend today, it read. He's not feeling the best. The next morning I got a call from Baskin and the day that Alex Baskin, the evolution producer guy, the head of the Baskin and Robbins, and

the day after that a Bravo publicist rang me late on a Friday. Some of what Sandoval had said had gotten back to Bravo and everyone was concerned. What was this? What did he say about OJ Simpson and George Floyd exactly? Maybe Sandoval wasn't ready for this. The Bravo publicist asked if I really needed to see him again. Could the network facilitate an interview with one of the shows other stars? Yeah, sure. Sure. He just made a comment about George Floyd.

Throw us la-la for 10 minutes. No. Bravo is regretting very much having Tom Sandoval be untethered in front of a New York Times reporter. Yeah, that's because there's no, by the way, you cannot tell me that that Sandoval is going to ever deny a New York Times reporter to sit in on his confessional tapings. Like that is not happening. He will have a New York Times reporter follow him anywhere if he can.

Yeah. Um, and, um, he signed up for Vanderpump Rules because he thought people should see what it's like being an LA Mactor. So he just did it to help us educate us, you know, guys. Like driving down the 405, changing clothes, comp cars and headshots, played all over my back seat.

Yeah. I mean, the show was okay, but when I punched Jacks, that sent it into the stratosphere Okay, relax or It wasn't when they gave us ever the guy who sent that show into the stratosphere. No stop and Jackson jacks Sorry, listen Listen as long as like it doesn't make them any better But they were the ones who did it they were that they were the monsters you they were the ones who did it. They were the monsters.

You were not the monster who did it. Yeah. And then Riley, Riley remembered watching that episode with her middle school friends. We were like, this show is epic. She said, dude, it was. Sandeval said, Riley says it was so cool. I, that was such a fucking disturbing. Her middle school friends.

So his publicist, his publicist was in middle school when this show started. And now that now she's his publicist, I don't let I don't know even how I feel about that. Yeah, I mean, it's so long. There was a part where he's, you know, going on about like, you know, I used to want to be a real actor and look down on reality TV, but now I look down on actors. I'm like, bro, can you do this? Oh dear. Meryl Streep's at home, like just like kind of giving herself scrapes on her arm with her nails, just like totally insecure about herself. Like what if I wasted my life doing

with her nails just like totally insecure about herself. Like what if I wasted my life doing, why I worked on all of these accents? What exactly does this mean when he says, can you do this? Does that like make a tone deaf statements about George Floyd? Is it about appearing on camera in a, you know, a motorcycle with a sidecar? Like what exactly is the this part that he's challenging the actors to do? You know, it was just written, but you know that he motorcycle with a side car. Like what exactly is the this part that he's challenging the actors to do?

You know, it was just written, but you know that he pointed at his face like, can you do this? Have the weight of the world on you? Just string towards the pompadour, you know? Yeah. Wow. What a spectacular hero.

What a fluza. Well, Tom Sandoval never fails to disappoint, I suppose, except that's exactly what his brand is. But... Disappointment. Disappointment and failure. Yes, Mac-ter. Wow, he just wanted to give us an insight

into the world of a Mac-ter. That is something that a Mac-ter would say, by the way. That is 100% a Mac-ter. Yeah, I want to give insight into the world of a Mac-ter-ter guide, hot guy, not hot enough to be a model, not good enough to be an actor. So you're both driving along, you got headshots in your car. Wow. It's pretty incisive so far.

Yeah, life of a Mac-ter driving a Nissan. Well, so well, that sounds like a, so I've got a lot of fun reading ahead of me. And then I think the thing for interview magazine, that just popped up this morning and it looks like it's a profile of him holding desserts. I don't even understand that. But yeah, I don't want to hear him complaining because now he's on the cover of the New York Times Magazine and he's an interview magazine and he's living his best life in those photo shoots, as you said.

And, you know, I don't know if I wanna hear any comment like, the world's against me, dude. I mean, cause the world is against him, but he has his fans and he's definitely getting his exposure and he's getting what he wants out of his career that he's always wanted, which is like massive media attention. Yeah.

So congratulations. All right. So here we go. Um, this is episode four of season 11 and this is another, um, gloss over and kind of owed to Tom Sandoval this episode. This is a poor, poor Tom. Oh, poor Tom. No one will forgive Tom and he's having dark thoughts. Yes, and it opens up with people, you know, getting ready for the day for all the nothing

they're going to be doing. Katie's doing her hair. Lala's looking through a bin. Shorts is doing push-ups. Sandoval is brushing his teeth, Ariana is brushing her teeth. That's, you know, exciting times happening in the world, in the world of this cast. Yeah, Brock's making a bottle for summer ocean, moon, face, winter and the winter. And she's crying and he's like, oh, those are crocodile tears.

And then we see the telltale sign that we're going to James and Ali's house Southwest I was gonna say Southwest airplane Flying overhead. I mean they really it's like clockwork. They just have it. They just every single time it goes over and you're like I'm so excited about it But it's not a lot of work hosting for all these people Doing a Po-pa-eh is hard! It's our first time hosting

for a Po-pa-eh I'm getting prepared to be a host Welcome, welcome, welcome to Costa Kennedy Not only did I buy the food and drinks I bought the barbecues well Yeah, he's like I work really hard today. I went to Home Depot.

I went to Vaughn's. I went to freaking Target. I'm like, that sounds like an excellent day. Like I would be jealous of that. And so he's like, say, okay, Ale, Ale, you're the decorate outside. Okay. Okay. She's like, yeah, I'm doing it.

Ha! I'm doing it. And then he sprays her with water. Stop James. James stop. James. Exactly. James stop. James. It's a mess of a bus. James no.

James stop there. I'm gonna pee in the bush. James no. So then we go to Eurion and Katie and they're like going over what they should wear. Like is this a one piece day? It's like a two piece too much. It's like basically me and Ben before any show.

And then she's like, can you believe our Lyft driver last night? I can't believe that. And then she's like, can you believe our lift driver last night? I can't believe that. And we find out that their lift driver for see you next Tuesday was like, whoa, I remember this house. You and your husband were fighting. I think he cheated on you.

He was the lift driver from the night, March 1st. Wow, that is what, it's always strange if you get like a ride share driver twice. Like it's happened to me like I think just once, maybe twice in my life, it's always strange. And even when I was driving Uber, it was strange to get the same passenger and that would happen and I'd be like,

I remember this place. But what I'm surprised at is that anyone, any driver could just remember one generic modern farmhouse from another. Like they all look the same. I don't know. I would never be able to say, oh, I remembered this house. And like it looks like literally every other house on this show. Well, they're so big. You know how they put those giant houses on the tiny lots. I think that's why you remember because they put this huge house on this little tiny lot and you're like oh my god how is that house even fitting on this lot and is this legal and is this

permitted you know all these questions run through your head when you see those those big McMansions on the little lot so yeah I think you remember that especially if you got Tom in your back seat going one day I'm gonna be in the New York Times and you're gonna regret this. And her going up for shut up you fucking loser. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial. From Wondery, this is Black History For Real. I'm Francesca Ramsey. And I'm Consciously.

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She is a heroine to some, as a fighter for black rights, she is a villain to others Follow Black History for Real on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere on February 5th, or you can listen early and ad-free on Wondery Plus starting January 29th. Join Wondry Plus on the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, played by HBO's industries, Myhalla Harald, a brilliant scholarship student who has to quickly adapt to her newfound eat or be eaten world. Ava's ambitions take hold and her small town values break in hopes of becoming the first scholarship student to make the list.

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where power, money, and sex collide in a game of life and death. Follow Academy on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Academy early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Academy early and add free right now by joining Wondery Plus. The driver was like, oh yeah, I remember this house. It's the only house I've ever dropped someone off at where there was a strange purple glow coming through all the windows. You're right, exactly.

The house that Huube it built. So she's like, well, I was like, we're not together anymore. And he was like, yeah, it makes sense. Because that was huge. And he has no idea. It was like a huge thing that happened. Yeah. Ariana's laughing.

He has no idea how many people probably want to talk to him. So Ariana thought that they're talking about last night when they went to sir and Ariana thought Lala had some really great points, but then Schwartz was acting all like, Oh my God, you guys are getting it up on me. And she's like, um, three people who have something to say that means you're being ganged up on. And so then she's like doing

her interview and she has like a her like she's like doing her makeup. She has like her mirror out. She's doing the thing on her face. They're definitely trying to give her the I'm too big for this show vibe. I think they're, I think they're going to try to sort of villainize her a little bit because they could have very easily asked her to say this line again, but instead they put in the one where she is putting makeup on. And she's like, the guy who I haven't spoken to in however many months all of a sudden is some sort of authority on who I am and how I live my life and how I think and feel. That's interesting. Just like a man. So Katie's like, like what? Like I'm supposed to get a taha?

Like I'm supposed to abandon all the work I'm doing right now, like to go on a Schwartz trap. And she tells us, yeah, I'd rather eat a jean jacket. That's such a specific choice. Like of all the things to eat a jean jacket is not available. I mean, I like Katie's talking about how she's so busy. Um, opening up the sandwich shop that she can't go to Tahoe as she prepares to go to a pool party in Burbank under a flight path with Pete falling out of a Southwest airline lab onto the lawn. So they're like, yeah, we're not going to that. Fuck that trip.

So then we go to Villa Rosa and Sheena and Lala are there and they're joking like, oh my God. Every time I pull up to this house, I'm like, this is just like mines. It's like mines. Should we place like a bet that Lisa will make a comment that I'm not wearing any clothes? Darling, you're not wearing any clothes. Oh my God, we just totally made a bet. Darling, you haven't met this guy before and she holds up a new dog. It looks like really all the other dogs

Just this is doughnut. I named her after Ken's favorite pillow. Why have you guys got no clues on? So this dog the cloning is starting to break So you know how the cloning the first clone is almost perfect and the next clone is like not perfect and the next clone is Kind of melty-faced and then the next clone is just like two. And the next clone is kind of melty faced. And then the next clone is just like two headed. What do you want to make? This clone, I know you want to make a multiplicity reference right now. So the floor is yours.

I was leaving that open. I was leaving that open for you. I've actually never seen this dog is you've never seen multiplicity. No, that's why every time you mention it, that's why I never I never pile on because I haven't seen it But I know you like to mention it Wow No, I mean it's that and you finally saw steel magnolias, right? I finally saw the color purple still magnolias I still have not seen

Multiplicity is when they just basically make a thousand dolly partons and each dolly parton has a different outfit. One of them has an allergic reaction to something. It's getting. That's like my favorite. That would be my version of multiplicity. Just make nine million dolly partons. No, I wasn't actually going to make a multiplicity statement. I was just going to say this dog looks like it is at the tail end of the cloning cycle. Let's just say that

This isn't this dogs not winning any DNA. You know what I mean? It's got the tail ends It's poor thing It looks like an Ewok that's been like smushed down with an iron and like run over by a tractor Stop cloning your dogs Well, yeah, sweet, sweet doughnut. I didn't study doughnut enough, but my impression of doughnut is that, yeah, maybe doughnut is on the raw end of the cloning stick there. But is that a raw end of a cloning stick?

I don't even know that. Fuck me with the cheese. I think I just like... Okay. I think I just mixed metaphors and added a new twist to it. He's on the raw end of the cloning stick. I kind of feel like this moment's like George Floyd. This is, I just made up a new statement.

So Lisa Vanderpump is like, oh, hello, hello. So I really want to talk to you about so many things. And I don't think you're going to like everything I have to say. And they're like, okay, what's good about? Well, can you believe it? Raquel was found in the hot tub with Tom Schwartz and Sandoval when Ariana was out of town

in the hot tub in the nighttime. Ken, that was last season, darling. All right. Go back inside, all right, till you remember what I've told you to bring out here this time. All right, I'll... Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz still stuck on Big Sur. Apparently at night time he has a whole different look. So, um, uh, so she's like, come on, come with me. I have to finish making this vase of flowers.

So they go outside and she's just making a vase and they just stare at her making a vase. It's definitely like a rich person thing to do just to remind the poor people how rich you are that like you are like making a vase. Well, so you used to have the excuse of the restaurants, right? Like, oh, I'm doing this for the restaurants. This is what I do. I work so hard every day. I wake up and I put pink flowers in a vase and then she would take it to the restaurant and be like, look at me, I put flowers into a vase. And they would all bow, you know. And now she's just like, fuck it, everywhere's closing. So I'm just doing vases, just for me.

Random things to put in front of Max's face when he's trying to tell me how his day is. You know what goes, darling. I just tell my sweet son, Max, here, can you take these flowers, put them over there. The man needs to bus. He needs to bus to be alive. He needs something to water her. He's just not whole. I need him to come over and ask if he can clear this plate. It just makes him feel happy. So she's like, I spent time with Sandoval. And I know for a fact he's in a very, very

dark place. And she's like, well, I'm past because I reached out to him and when I was friend I'm him blocked me and he's reaching into this villain energy and I'm really not here for it. He needs to humble himself. He needs to have humility. And I told him, better find a good therapist, too. Meow. Yeah, he needs a good therapist. Or instead of a therapist, he could go to a place called Intimacy and get into a cold bath. So, Sheena's like, yeah, my conversation with Sandoval

like could not have been like more frustrating. Like he's taking like no accountability accountability for anything he's done. And so Lisa says he's depressed. I haven't seen that. I've just seen him project. So Lisa says, maybe he's angry and upset. He doesn't know what he's doing. He's a broken bird.

My favorite kind of bird. And Lola is saying, no, he's stepping down. What did he say to me last night? What did he say? What did he say about me? Shit, ah. And Sheena's like, he called you a narcissist. She's like, yeah, a narcissist.

And then we see the clip of Sheena saying, a narcissist wouldn't call themselves a narcissist. And I'm like, yeah, I know. That's why Lala won't call itself that. Bling, and bing. So to show that Lala is not a narcissist, she absolutely does not make this about her. She goes, I've messed up a lot of times

and I feel like I own it all the time. Yes, I should have asked more questions about Randall's. I'm not stupid, I understand it. And you know what? I was in a relationship that was tough. I had to watch a man bounce fried chicken thighs on his stomach for kink. Yes It was hard and I didn't I didn't ask questions. I knew it. Okay, la la you're talking about randomly can respond to me talking about

scandals I love that. La la still trying to make that story. I mean this cast I swear So Vanderpump's like oh and we never held that against you What are you talking about you all held it against her for like For like years and years, of course you did. This is Vanderpump Rules. And she goes, but he has. He has. He's going to the press and he's saying that Lala needs to share her lives and that she's not real. And I just can't forgive someone's when they can't acknowledge they hurt me. But you have the support and love right now. Life is going swimmingly for you. Look at what you've achieved. Look at all the... I mean, you moved to Westwood, that was an

accomplishment, but he's doing nothing. He has no support, darling. Look at poor, poor Sandoval. He looks like a pottery version of his former self. Sad Duval, he looks like a pottery version of his former self. Just dried out and clay looking, he's aged 30 years. I mean that was before the affair as well. But no one's really sure, but I don't know if he's allergic to moisturiser, what it is. I didn't really ask, really, I don't care. But you should, darling! His own, the other people who work in his kitchens call him clay Duval. It's just sad. It's sad

That he really has turned into clay Duval Yeah, clay do he does look like he does look like a pottery sandoval So she's like a darling. Okay Lisa, you know what if you're just so worried about Tom Why don't you take him off television first of all? Because it's obviously not good for him and take him into your home and really work on him Lisa like one of your projects instead of forcing his ass on the rest of us, okay and giving him, you know Presence and for what he did, you know and congratulating him and just moving him up in the world

for what he did, you know, and congratulating him and just moving him up in the world for what he did. Like, I'm not buying it from Lisa. And also, like, I'm really truly, and this is me not being bitchy, but I said it just after something, bitchy, I feel for Lisa with her brother, obviously, that's terrible, but that's not fair to use that to guilt other people into things regarding other people

that have nothing to do with them. That's not right. I don't know. I mean, I think that like what she went through with her brother was really terrible, obviously. And so I think that she's probably particularly sensitive to it. So like, I don't, I actually don't find fault with her having that instinct. I just don't know with Sandoval. I think you're like, some people were saying that online too't know with Sandoval. I think you're like some people were saying that online too, that if Sandoval, like Sandoval, the healthiest thing for him, if he is really in a challenging space for this mental health

is to not be on reality TV. So Lisa is basically saying how that he's like a shadow of his former self and he just doesn't want, she doesn't want to see anyone go down a path of that kind of depression when the world is against you. And she says she's seen depression, she knows depression, she remembers what her brother said. It's always going to stay with her and there's just like only so much that someone can take before they break. And she just doesn't want to be in a position where they all have regret. And you know, she says that she never

thought suicide would touch her life. This is all a massive trigger for her. She really feels that Sandoval is not the sort of person to say he has suicidal thoughts unless he means it. I think that it sucks because everybody loves Lisa and especially these girls and you're not going to be like, oh, well, I'm going to completely disregard what you just said about your brother, because, you know, obviously that's a very real thing and no one's going to be that mean, but it puts them in a place where they're immediately like, oh my God, Lisa went through this. So it's almost like Lisa went through this. So now let's just let Tom back in. And I just, I think what is very difficult here,

I'm just gonna be honest. I don't want to say like it's not fair, like, because, you know, it's, I'm gonna say something that may get me into trouble, but I'm gonna, it's, it's coming from an honest place of how I feel, which is that what's, what's difficult about this situation here is that I don't think anyone wants to see anyone who is struggling with their mental health, who is in depression, who may hurt themselves. No one wants to see anyone who is struggling with their mental health, who is in depression, who may hurt themselves. No one wants to see anyone go down that path. And I don't even want to see Tom Sandoval go down that path. I don't want to see Rachel go down that path.

I don't want to see anyone go down that path. And what's hard here is that when, you know, Lisa says, when Sandoval says he feels this way, he's not going to say that unless he means it. The problem for me is that his credibility is so in the gutter and I have to grapple with the, with this idea that I want to believe someone, if someone says that they're having suicidal ideations, if someone says they're depressed, my instinct is to say, no matter what you have to believe that and you have to lead with that. But what's hard is that his credibility is such shit that honestly I can't help but feel like is he really or is this just like another part of like the story he's weaving to gain sympathy and I hate, I absolutely hate

having to have that doubt and I tried to skirt around it because I'm like I don't want people to be like how could you doubt that but like honestly it is what I think when I watch the show. I hope to God that that is that I'm 100% wrong. Because it because that would be real bullshit if there were some sort of manipulation around that. But that is truly how I feel when I watch this. And I think most people do, right? I mean, it's Tom. So I think most people do feel that. But I think it's just one of those things where if somebody says it you just take it at face value No matter what because yeah, and that's one of those things where it's like it's not really as important to be right I guess in this instance as it's yeah, that's a really good point

But at the same time, you know, it also doesn't just it's also not just a get out of jail free card Where everybody needs to be like, okay, whatever you need that, you know, it also doesn't just, it's also not just a get out of jail free card where everybody needs to be like, okay, whatever you need then, you know, it's, I think in one way it's like, well, it's not us personally, but like the cast, okay, well, you don't need to be doing podcasts about him every single day. And you don't need to be giving interviews about it every single day. And you don't need to make it all about completely villainizing it every single day. But I don't think it also needs to be like, okay,

but then we need to shove him in Ariana's face every episode either. So I mean, I don't really know what the answer is, but it's a quagmire. It's a real, it's a real- It's a classic bit of Pup Ruhl's quagmire. Yeah. But you know what, I was like, you know what?

I was gonna skirt around this. I was like, you know what, I'm like, we're on a podcast. I have to express how I feel when I'm watching the show. And that's how I feel. And I don't like it. And like, but it is like, so that's why when Lisa says, oh, he's someone who, when he says this, he wouldn't lie about it. That's, I think that was what made me be like, I have to say something about this because

the truth is that he has deeply lied about things, like really, really fundamentally lied in hurtful ways. And so it's, it's just, I don't know. It's hard for me to take anything that he says. I have to take everything with some skepticism, no matter what now. So it's difficult. Yeah. So, um, it's very important thing is difficult to get through for us. That's what we're like.

This is narcissists. We're like, guys as we're like, this is narcissists. Guys, this is how difficult this is for us. God damn, Zandabop. God, he's done to us. But yeah, it is a difficult place, but that's kind of why we're in that place, you know what I mean? Because you get put in that difficult place

and it's like, oh, but then, you know, you're emotionally torn, so then you have to put that person back. You have to let that person back in. Dun dun dun. I know, cause we're good people. Yeah, we're just, we're really good people. Guys, guys,

Sandoval is now the third co-host of the show. Yeah, guys, we felt so bad about Tom Sandoval. He's joining us now. Lala, so, so then Lala goes, you know, I hear what you're saying. And I most certainly don't want anyone to wear this for the rest of their life because I know what it's like to continue. See, I was like, oh, for fuck's sake. The way she is trying because Lala has never been able to have the A story

on this show. She's always B or C even, and she has, every time she has a scandal, someone has just a bigger version of it. So she's like, okay, so the coast is clear. I can have a scandal now, can I? No? Yeah, and she's like, yeah, it's just like me. Cause I don't want them to have to carry it like I had to.

I never really gave Santa Claus health much thought. In my mind, I looked at him as someone like my ex. They don't have like feelings. And I don't want to be angry all the time. It's truly killing me. It's killing me. And this hasn't been like easy for me, especially I was so distracted the other day that I burned my famous enchiladas. He was genuinely like one of the best friends I ever had in my life. So she was like, but doesn't that make it easier if you just forgive?

And I don't know, have you called Kyle Richards lately? She's not going through a great time. Ronnie, that was so good. Oh. Just saying. Wow, goodnight everyone, goodnight. We are watching Rapids. The show is over.

There's no need to top it. Nothing else needs to be said. That was good. So Sina's like, what is the word, little thing, are y'all ah? She talks to her Sina, don't just be a people pleaser. Unless you're pleasing me and Sandoval. Go, you'll tears you I don't think we need to tell anyone on this cast

It's go where their gut tells them because it has never led to a good place ever Yeah, instincts don't work on this show. Okay Mushrooms, here comes one right now. So instincts led to a 10 year relationship with Tom Sandoval. Sheen is like, uh, are you on a made it very clear that anyone who chooses to be friends with Sandoval is basically dead. Yeah. But like at the same time, if someone's like really struggling at this level,

like how do I like keep coming for like, how do I keep coming from? So then I think this is where I was thinking like, okay, well, you can, you can not completely forgive the person, but then also not do a podcast about them every day to get money for yourself. You know what I mean? Yeah. There is a middle ground. Also, by the way, let's not forget that Lisa Vanderpump, she has a show that she has to oversee here,

and she knows this cast has to get along and has to shoot together, so she's like, come on, come on, step up and lip and all that. But I think also behind the scenes, I think this cast also realizes that and they've also been shooting now for a while and see what the season is, which is literally nothing. Like nothing is happening.

It's like a bunch of kumbaya moments. This is episode four, which means it's probably weak, four-ish. So they're probably like, okay, nothing's happening. And these two are making all these millions off this show and nobody else is. So why are we trying to work? They should be fighting on this show. Let's bring his ass back around. What the hell am I trying to pretend? I care about Katie's Jean jacket jokes

That's probably very true. Although hot take I'm really enjoying the season I don't know other people are enjoying it But I actually am enjoying it because I feel like everything they're talking about is like real shit in their lives as opposed to like Do let's have like a party where we dress up like we're in a gym or something, you know? Like so, it's not full of fireworks, but I'm into it. Oddly enough, I am into it. So anyway, who cares? So Sheena's like, um, okay, well, we're gonna go to Tahoe. Yeah, because we want to be on the show.

So we're gonna do that. And Sheena says, she's like, well, yeah, you know, there's like a lighthouse and like a boat. So like I'm totally in like a special stuff. We can like put Tom in the pool in the water and see if he can drown like Jack's almost did. So they don't know if Santa Claus is going to go, but this is going to go right. But just let him come if he wants to stop attacking him.

No one's perfect. Right. Nope. Just look at roseo random random stray over there did you know roseo has one ear that's bigger than the other here throw a flower at her did you know her foot is composed mainly of cucumbers. How odd Sometimes Ken and I like to play this game where we push Roshio down the right side of the stairs and see if she ever touches The left side of the stairs anybody want to play We caught Roshio bowling

But we're not to be confused Not not to be confused with bowling at Rocio, which is what we have a stand at the end of a bowling alley and roll balls at her just to avoid them. Gens of all is very slow, but it gets there. OK, so now we go to James's and we know why because. So, uh, yeah, a poo. So it's a big pool party, Katie and Ariana arrive, and then Sheena and Lala arrive. There's basically like six people, and James is acting like he is, you know, performing

at Farkaske it again. So he's, yeah, poo-pa-ah, poo-pa-ah, here we go, everyone! And Schwartz comes with some plants, and Allie's like, wow, he brought another plant plant I think this is the third plant that Schwartz has given us I think I'll need a gardener that's so torious of me what did she I forget what she is did she tell us she's like that's so likely brah so Jericho James's friend is there and Schwartz is like oh yeah I'm like sober curious but I think I'm gonna like that's so likely, brah. So Jericho James's friend is there and Schwartz is like, oh yeah, I'm like sober curious,

but I think I'm gonna have some of this tequila cause it's really good tequila. I'm really curious about the tequila and oh no, the girls are here last night. The conversation with the group didn't go so well. They tart and feathered me, man. But I'm Tom Schwartz. I'm not the accessory to the affair. I'm just the guy whose house they used to fuck in and the guy that lives

for Tom every day. Whatever. I'm just the guy who helped this affair continue on quietly behind closed doors without anyone knowing. It was almost like, um, if their affair was the laptop, I was the dongle. I was like the accessory. Oh no, I was the accessory. I'm just the Cato Kaland of this affair, guys. Dude, I told you I was like the OJ Trial. Jesus, just coming here was like everybody chasing me down the freeway in my white Bronco. heroes like everybody chasing me down the freeway my wife Bronco. Dude next time with your wife Bronco like you totally add like a purple highlight or underneath the undercarriage it looks awesome it's sick. So James has made something about her store floaty which is actually more progress than the

actual restaurant. I have to give them credit. Lay's built them a set box which we haven't shown yet, right? Did you show yours? The potato chip box that they sent? I feel like I did back. I pushed up on the gram back. It was during BravoCon. I'll get it next time.

It came during BravoCon. So all of you guys were actually doing something productive with your time. I was taking photos of a Lays potato box. Anyway, they did that and then he's made this floaty version of it. So now James is doing exactly what you think, you know, a mature homeowner would be doing, jumping off the roof into his pool. Yeah, score. The usual, usual thing.

I feel like that is, you know, I've talked a lot of shit about the valley, but I think that one of the perks of the valley is that it seems like every house in the Valley has the ability to say, I'm a golden God and jump into a pool. Like, I think all houses in the in the Valley are zones that way there's at least one roof very close to a pool that you can jump into. So that's cool. Okay, so now we go to the classiest place we've seen in a long time on this show. Into Me See. Okay, this is a real stretch. Intumisie. There are a lot of really bad pun stores in Los Angeles

and a lot of bad, silly named, here's where the silly names are in Los Angeles. Anyone who opens up like a fa restaurant, they love a pun, like fa me or- I know me or one for that was my favorite. All those but then new age stuff also into me see this has a real this is a real stretch here because it's spelled into me see see se a And they pronounce it intimacy. So, intimacy, and also it sounds gross

because I don't wanna go sit in a tub if someone's come, you know what I mean? Like what is this below deck? That's what it sounds like, right? People fucking these tubs, you wanna come in? It is literally, like I think it's trying to seem deep, but it's really just saying welcome to a sea of self involvement.

It literally says, into me, see, like, I'm into me. I'm into me. Which is a perfect place for a Tom Sandoval scene. So let's go with Billy Lee, the added bonus of Billy Lee. Wow, how'd she ever get fired? Crazy. So they walk into me see, into me see, and the lady's like, welcome,

this is our quantum wellness studio. Have you guys ever done cold plunges before? And Santa ball tells us this whole situation with like the scandal and the aftermath of like been really stressed out, like depressed and overwhelmed. And like, I realized that I have to be able to handle those emotions in different ways, healthier ways. I'm like, go to therapy, not, not an ice bucket challenge. Yeah, this is going to fix everything.

So he gets in this bath of cold water and Billy's just like kneeling down, watching him with her, her eyes really wide. Billy looks like someone's always throwing keys at her. You know what I mean? Like she, I think you said that. That's so true. She has that look of fear in her eyes that I get when someone throws keys at me like.

But she's just always like, she just stays like that. It's like someone slapped her on the back when keys were being thrown at her. And she's like, how are you feeling Tom? How are you feeling? Is it cold? And he's like, oh, it's cold, pal. Inside, pal.

Inside. feeling is it cold and he's like oh it's cold inside bro what is the pain level between one and ten he's like oh dude it's like a nine bro oh man it feels like especially weird right now because I've never been an outsider with my group of friends and I just feel like and to do fraying when he first gets to Shawshank, man. Like I wish I could just get back some part of my life, my old life. Like always the people that are close to you that seem to hurt you the most.

I was like, yeah, isn't that funny? How the people that are close to you hurt you the most. You should ask Ariana about that actually. Just ask your mom about that. You should ask literally the person at Starbucks. Should ask her non-retired yet mother about that actually. Just ask your mom about that. You should ask literally the person at Starbucks. Should ask her non retired yet mother about that, who no longer has her fund to retire Tom. So, um, then he like goes forward and ducks his head in the water and like

slowly brings it out and the water brings us forward duck tail down. And he just like poses and flexes for the camera I was like wow, well, really is watching him song, but a meaningful scene Tom Oh my god, really has a smile on her face like oh my god. I can't believe he did it Oh my god, she's like watching Frankenstein come to life or something like she was just like six so many people Come see me my open market. Laugh factory now. Can't wait to tell off.

Sweet Lady Janes is bakery when it closes. So now back to the pool party. And again, we know this because while Tom is like in the pool, we hear the. So another plane goes over by and then, you know, the pool party, Lala's talking about how her bathing suit makes me want to get a BBL, you know, my, I want to get a BBL, especially after everything I've gone through with Rand, because I know what it's like to carry the shame of someone who's called a, okay, Lala, okay, Lala. Okay, Lala. This is so a conversation between a new LA young fresh person and an older Haggard LA person.

Okay. Um, I want to get a BBL old Haggard person, young person. Same. Let's just hold each other accountable and do 50 squats a day. That's like so I just got to L.A. is spent. Right. Know what we should do? We should be accountability buddies. Fuck off.

How about that? I don't want to fucking accountability. Get some get some fat from my face and put it into my ass. Yeah, about to say the new the new person to L.A. actually has dreams that if you work hard for something, you'll achieve it. The the the person who's been through the works knows you work hard for something you'll achieve it. The person who's been through the works knows you just got to do what you can do. You got to just cheat your way to the top. I mean, that sounds, I mean, look, Tom Sandoval is literally on the cover of New York

Times Max and he literally cheated his way to the top. Okay. You just got to cut corners where you can. So Ali says that James hasn't had a drink in three months. And Lala's like, yeah, the first 30 days, it's like freaking hard. It's sort of like the first 30 days when I was separated from Rand. Because that's just like a really big thing when I was separated from Rand, you know?

And then we cut to James outside, coming, look, it's like beers, but they're weed, bro. And then you like pop some open and starts like chugging. It's doing great. That's the part that's a variety is killing. Bro, and then you like pops him up and it starts like chugging. Doing great. That's the part that's a variety is killing. So do you guys ever have conversations about why he got sober? Because I've had a lot of sobering conversations about the trauma I went through when I was date, when I was married to Rand.

You know, it was such a tough time for me in my life. And I feel like it's something that I really understand well and can talk about at length. She's like, well, did he ever tell you why she got sober? Because I want to know like why, why did he get sober? So what was his rock bottom moment? I can't wait to use it to get stimulators. And she's like, I'm not gonna like share that personally, but like you could ask him about it

and then maybe he could tell you about it. She's like, wait, everybody has the rock bottom moments, Alice. Tell me what's this rock bottom moment? I'm not gonna tell you. Tell me, Alice! Tell me I'm gonna use your face and put it in my ass. It's a BBL. Don't tell anyone, but his rock bottom moment literally

happened at the restaurant rock bottom. He threw some spinach artichoke dip against the wall. And I was like, you're at the rock bottom he's like I know that's what we're eating not it was terrible and my life like well here's my rock bottoms and she talks about when she went to Disney World with Rams family and Rams kids and was wasted the whole time and was like that was rock bottoms for me I mean nothing's worse than telling Cinderella off for having a pancake ass, but I did it.

I came back and I changed my fucking life. I mean, do you know how difficult it was for me when Rand Scott into the Dumber Ride and had to be pried out by a fire engine team and I was drunk the entire time that was my rock bottom. So she's like, yeah, but like with ups and downs, I don't want to trigger James. Cause sobriety is something I'm very passionate about. So meanwhile, James is like checking the drinks outside

and starting all the hamburgers on fire. And our round is just like, fire, James. It's a fire. And he starts like, he starts like flapping something at it. And Arianna's like, don't fan the flames, James, don't fan the flames, which just felt poetic for this show. I mean, this is the show that's all about fanning flames. I know, that's the name of the spinoff.

Don't fan the flames. Um, then he't fan the flames. Then he does fan the flames and then he starts DJing. And at first I was like, this is so shitty to have people come to your party where they're forced to listen to your shitty DJ sets. But then I remembered myself because, you know, a party at my house is like, John Cassane, darling, John Cassane. Ronnie Oakey. It's like, there's karaoke here.

Nope. It's just for me. You can have a seat right over there. Enjoy the Fritos. So now Lala is talking with shorts in the corner and goes, Hey, I know I came pretty heavy last night, sort of like all the heavy experiences I had after I got divorced from Rand after you cheated on me.

Would you like to ask any questions about it? It was a tough time. We can make it the story of the season if you want. It's not as heavy as I came with Sladondo. That was some squirtings. That was some squirtings. So I'm still working on like, don't get triggered by our experiences,

but that's gonna be a process. And he goes, yeah, oh, that's beautiful. I love this. I'm so tired of keeping my dukes up. I can't go from like machetes to crying in the fetal position There has to be a middle ground for me. He's like, yeah, oh, and I appreciate you acknowledging that You know, we all have problems, but there was a moment last night and Horeanna looked at me like I was subhuman Like I was just some Muck that came out of the river, which to be fair, I do spend a lot of time

just rolling around in rivers. So I kind of get that. Like she's been exalted to this queen status or something. Okay, okay, okay. First of all, Lala is such a guy on this show, isn't she? You can tell that she's like paid more attention to the guys, like how the guys behave on this show because she acts just like one of the guys. She acts like an asshole. And then she comes back and she's like paid more attention to the guys, like how the guys behave on this show, because she acts just like one of the guys.

She acts like an asshole, and then she comes back and she's like, I'm totally different now. I'm a different La La's than the La La's she knew before. So she's doing her La La 6.0 or whatever she's on now. And Tom understands it. So he's like, she's one of us now. And we're just gonna, she's guy coding her language. So, okay, are we Ariana's a bitch, right?

Immediately, you know, it's also like such the thing that like a guy, especially on this show would be pissed at Ariana being put on to an alleged pedestal, because that's the pedestal that he wants to be on. He wants, he literally wants to be on a pedestal. That's why he's always like, Oh, I'm so cute. Put me on a cute pedestal. And it's like, yeah, Ariana has been put on a pedestal, but the pedestal is not so much that Ariana was put on a pedestal. It's like she was standing on just normal ground and the ground beneath all the rest of you guys just sunk, you know?

So she just sort of became a pedestal. But I think it's like, yeah, she was put on a pedestal because when Scandavall happened, we all sort of had a moment where we said, you know what? A, this is wild, but B, Ariana has been the only cast member over 10 years who's been more or less pretty chill, pretty reasonable, pretty nice. No one is without fault for sure. But as one of those moments we think, is, everyone on this show has been so terrible at one time or another.

And Ariana's been like the only, like, semi-decent one. And then she's the one who just gets cheated on in this way. And so everyone wants to give her some flowers. And now they are all so resentful of it. It is hilarious. She was like, yeah, she was put on a pedestal. That's what she was trying to say. I was like, yeah, there was like a diva energy, you know, but I'm not going to fawn over her

and, you know, just for her affection or validation from her. I mean, that was very triggering last night. That was really triggering. Really? Um, maybe it was triggering that you not only brought her ex who totally fucked her over, but then tried to get all of her friends to hang out with him and her at the same time. Like why is that not okay for her to be triggered about that? Geez. So she's like, yeah, but that's natural. But I thought you handled it so wealth. But you know, like I was triggered. Okay. Can we all just stop being triggered?

First of all, please. I can't. Yeah, but I was triggered those because I merely took it that you that you talked about my ego. So there are times when I take things at heart, okay? For instance, you know, like when Rand cheated on me and then left me and almost had, I kind of had a lalavall moment there instead of scandavall moment, you know, and like that was kind of a big thing. So maybe we should talk about that a little bit more this season, you know? Scandandalala.

Yeah, Scandal, Scand, Randval. No, Scandal, Scand. Randval works, yeah. Randval. And Randval is just random, and I'm saying Randval makes together. Scandalala. Scandalala.

Scanda, Scanda. And the small letters under it say, Randval means. Scandal limit. Scandal, Scandalala. Randall's important. Scrand, Scrandeval. So she's like, yeah, but I'm just working on not being a dog and everyone else's fight.

I used to think it was my superpower to call people under shits, but it's just not how it is. And at some points, I have to practice forgiveness. I cannot wear my traumas like a badge of honor forever. For example, I'm triggered and traumatized. I was like, you just said triggered. I don't think you're allowed to talk about not wearing your trauma as a bandit anymore.

You've said triggered five times this episode. This was actually a major step for Lala to realize that she doesn't actually have to step in and call people under shit every single second. I think that maybe realize that she doesn't actually have to step in and call people in their shit every single second. I think that maybe now that she has a podcast, she has realized, oh, you don't have to step in. You just have to have a podcast and talk about people on your podcast.

And it's just as fun and rewarding. Um, yeah. Uh, so Lala's like, yeah, I didn't mean to have you abandoned Tom, but come on. You just, she's everyone, you know, it's how my dad was. And people just build, oh, uh, build us over him and the stress of it. Truly, I believe it kills my dad's. So I want you to do, you know, do things for you for once. So you're talking to one of the most selfish people on this show.

I know. Like, can we not? His wife just left him because he's a selfish piece of shit. Can we stop acting like Tom Schwartz is also not a selfish piece of just because he walks around talking in a baby voice does not make him not a selfish piece of shit. But I also know Lala now and I know what she's doing and I like it. This is Lala where she's just resetting everybody and getting better everybody back in place so that she has people to yell at. Because if everyone's mad at you and no one's talking to you,

who are you going to yell at? You know, you've got to have people standing in front of you to yell at. And she also knows, I mean, here's the thing that I have been the biggest Lala fan. She has also driven me absolutely nuts. But one thing you can never take away from Lala is she knows how to play the game. And she is, she's like Lisa She's like we have a show to shoot here. So we have to start like I'm just I'm just gonna suck it up and try to make things nice with shorts

Hello there, this is a two-part recap. Okay, this is the end of part one. So thank you so much for listening to this Just come back a little later for part two Watch what crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Stroll in the park with Caitlyn Clark. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela. Itchels.

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