Watch What Crappens - #2338 PumpRules Part 1: Wolf in Sheep’s Loathing

Episode Date: February 28, 2024

*This is part one of a two-part recapNo one wants to hang out with Sandoval on Vanderpump Rules (S11E05), but Lisa’s wolfy restaurants don’t promote themselves. So, it’s off to Tahoe for an awkward group trip full of sledgehammers, bee stings, and Brock in a kimono. Is this the first step towards Sandoval re-entering the group? Grab tickets for the Netflix is a Joke Fest in LA and our European tour at watchwhatcrappens.com Watch this recap as a video and get our bonus episodes at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously, but hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch Our Crappings, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker joining me is the one and only the hilarious and fabulous Mr. Ronnie Karam.

Hi Ronnie. How are you? I am doing quite quite well. It's Vanderpump Rules Day. We're going to London. We're going to Dublin and we're going to Dublin, and we're going to Birmingham, England, all in May. If you didn't hear the news, that's the news. Go to WatcherCrapins.com to get your tickets. We are also part of Netflix as a joke this year. We will be at the Cucabar

Lounge early May here in Hollywood. So those are four really fun and exciting shows that we'll be doing. Go to WatcherCrapins.com to get those. Also, be sure to join our Patreon if you haven't already. There's always a weekly bonus episode, which is fun. And then we also have Crappens on Demand, which means that not only do you get to listen to us, you can watch us. You can see I'm actually broadcasting live from the gates of Sir Restaurant. Yes, I have set up my microphone and my camera and my laptop and all my rigs, and I am here on the sidewalk of Robertson. It's also nighttime suddenly, and I am here.

And you would know that if you were watching on Crap It's On Demand. So that's all the great stuff to know. Ronnie, what's going on? What's on the camera? I am looking through colors for my lights so I can have lights behind me that are a color too. Because you're like, you look so good

and I just have like regular gold. So I'm looking for pink, but I don't know how to use this thing for, I don't know how to use my Tom Sandoval lights very well yet. See, I've got my Lisa Vanderpump lights on, but what's great is I don't have any of them on. I'm just using an image of her. So it looks like I've got them on,

but actually I'm discovering that if I use dark images behind me, I feel like I look a lot better as opposed to my uncle. I look like Uncle Fester. No, I'm not who hasn't had enough iron. Okay, let's get on with this. Hey, that's my vibe. I'm an Uncle Fester who hasn't had enough iron, okay?

I strive for that look. So let's go to this recap of Vanderpump Oh, I'm opening a new business venture wolf Please don't let threats of suicide ruin my new business venture wolf I was like wow you're really going a far a long way to sell some appetizers and Tahoe there Vanderpump. Okay Tahoe is such a strange choice in my mind for the next Vanderpump venture. I would think maybe Miami or Scottsdale or Nashville but Tahoe I was not expecting talk, You know, there's a restaurant here where I live and it's a group of people from Tahoe

and the restaurant owners opened a restaurant here and they brought the staff all from Tahoe. And so they're just like Tahoe people, okay? It's called Artemis in case anyone's wondering. And they are such- After all that, it's called Artemis. They're such Tahoe people. Like I never really knew what Tahoe was like,

but they are so Tahoe. They I never really knew what Tahoe was like, but they are so They're like earrings and you know lots of tats and they just look at us like we're morons I'm like we have earrings and tats to this is Austin. Okay. It's not like you move to Pleasantville, but they're like aware like cooler than you and our lake is even cooler than your lake And so I'm like whatever get me my fucking hummus. You fucking Tahoe person. Tahoe people are very snotty. They're very snotty lake people.

Yeah. But you know what though, you know why? Because they have a whole Tilda Swinton movie based off of them, you know? And that's, that like gives you a huge amount of cred. Cause it takes a lot to put on a bunch of tattoos and earrings and go to Austin and try to out Austin, Austin, because that's kind of Austin's thing.

But they're like, no, but there was a Tilda Swin movie that took place in Tahoe. So, so we've got that cred. It's called the D. They also just, they have a bitchy name because it's like Tahoe. Tah Tahoe. You know, they've got. It is.

It's a little, so I've been to Lake Tahoe twice in my life one time when I was like 21 and I drove through Lake Tahoe With my brother on the way back from Reno to San Francisco randomly and then also, you know our old friend Joe Fawze Joe Fawze who I started TV gas and with 20 years ago by the way Ronnie for that shit. That is crazy. So Joe Foss had his bachelor party weekend in Lake Tahoe

and there were forest fires. And I just remember driving up and I could see flames and there was smoke everywhere. And we're just like in this little cabin and there was smoke everywhere. And that was the first time I played Settlers at Catan. And now I'm a board game maniac. So I guess.

Oh, come on, you have actually like some important history. Where's my story going? So wait a second, I think I like Lake Tahoe. I don't know, but that story would fit in right with Lake Tahoe people, because that's a... What a many different, what a many uninteresting directions. They'll just go on and on about how they fell in love with the board game one time.

I'm like, that's so Tahoe of you. By the way, could that have been a worse story? I went to like Tahoe and there were forest fires everywhere. I could see the fire, I could see the smoke when I was in this cabin and I played Katana first time. I fell in love with the Settlers of Katana. It was like, I had to be evacuated. No, everything was fine. I just played Settlers of Katana. And you not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it.

I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it.

I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it.

I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. I'm not really good at it. This is not our first time to Tahoe. Last year they went to Lake Havasu, isn't that in Tahoe?

No, that's in Arizona. It's totally different lake energy. That was trash here. That was like for sure. Those are some trash people. It is. That's like pontoon energy. That's like Vicki Gumbelson getting hit

with like a football on a pontoon energy. Okay, so here's something I learned about Vanderpump rules. I don't know if this is true, but you know, there's so many people who have Vanderpump rules podcast from the show. So there's all this information coming from like, Lala's podcast or Sheena's podcast or Raquel's podcast or Rachel, whatever,

whoever's podcast. There's so much, I don't know who to believe you guys, it's just so much. But one of the things I read in comments or Vandepod recaps, who knows, was that this whole scene with James was just a setup last week when he was picking up Graham

and pretending he had never seen Graham. He had already had Graham back and that was just a scene to make everything look good. And if that's true, I don't like being manipulated like that. How dare you? I fell for it. I cried a little bit. Wow, is Banner Pump Dogs now just like the stadium

for manipulation? Because let's not forget that's famously where Lisa Banner Pump had brought Teddy to in order to talk about Dreatz Dog, dog, Lucy, Lucy, Apple, Juicy. Remember that was her, that's what Teddy claimed. Like she called me there and wanted me to talk about Lucy, Lucy, Apple, Juicy to make DeRiette look bad. Hi, I'm Teddy.

But I should have known because the Graham did not look that excited to see James. So he probably had already been walked in by James. But I will say James can cry on cue. That's pretty important. That's pretty important. That's pretty important. Also very scary. And maybe I won't feel so bad for him anymore.

Because- You feel bad for James? He, well every now and then I feel bad for him because I just see like some dorky, skinny, outsider child getting his arm broken on the playground. And I feel bad for him. So, you know, I just, I feel like I just have, I guess I just have so much more,

I feel like I have so much more perspective on his pain than I do on someone like Jax, who you know Jax was the one who broke the James Kennedy's arm on the playground and then Jax is like trying to act like he has pain. By the way, the trailer for the Valley came out today. I don't know if you can see it. Bonus episode alert.

What the heck, I didn't know. Okay, bonus episode. Yeah, I know if you see it. Bonus episode alert. What the heck, I didn't know. Okay, bonus episode. Yeah, I just happened to see it this morning. And okay, let's do the bonus, bonus episode alert. Get excited for it. I am, and you know the rumor is that Brittany left Jax. So I don't know if that's true or if people are, that's what this podcast should be today.

I don't know if it's true. I've said that 20 times. I don't know if it's true. But it could have happened. And I've said that 20 times. I don't know if it's true It could have happened. I will and I you know, I hope so for her case But supposedly he went out and had a night with the Tom's of debauchery and then She found out about it and she dumped him. She moved out of the house. So oh, no, it's hope so no no No, she's not she's got too many daddy issues to ever leave jacks But I will say one thing.

I will say one thing that did surprise me about the trailer without getting too into it. I was surprised that Brittany's gay is in the show as a full cast member. So good for him. He climbed his way up into the reality star cast. Yeah, you never know. You know, I mean, just stay thirsty because you never know when that glass of water is coming along.

I mean, that guy was put in his time. He did. Zach. He did. Zach is his name, I believe. Zach. He's put in his time. I've seen him get into little snits with people online and stuff.

I'm like, wow, he's, you know, he's making an effort. Good for you, Zach. You go boy. Okay. So, um, let's start anyway. Tahoe. Hope you find. Let's talk about, let's talk about random pump rules. So, um, oh, you find. Let's talk about Vanderpump rules.

So, oh, you're saying it's about the dog thing. Yes. By the way, as long as you're talking about Vanderpump podcasts, big shout out to Sup, who had a big live show this weekend here in LA. So congratulations, you guys. Yeah, they sold it out. So and Laura was in a Carbacher tap. So, Cred was at least here.

And it worked on her. It worked. That was amazing, but I have to say, I was fairly obsessed with the Carrier shirt. Yeah, the Western shirt. I'm sure, yeah. That was literally amazing. He was like cosplaying country,

just like an Artemis Tahoe waiter. So there, I said it. I said it. I said it. No, he looked hot as always. As much as I loved, he looked great, but as much as I loved Kerry's shirt, I don't know if it could compare to me, to my reaction, my surprise reaction to Brock

wearing a kimono with a Speedo. Cause that did a lot more for me than I ever expected. God, I love that guy. I fucking love Brock. That was so hot. He is so hot. I love him. Like I don't even care That was so hot. He is so hot. I love him. Like I don't even care.

Don't pay for your kids. What do I care? You know? Kids should have jobs anyway. There's my advice to your babies if they don't get child support. Get a job, okay? This iPhone was made by a child.

They did a good job. What are your kids doing? You know? You want child support? How about you get you support? Okay? Where's daddy support? It's the child reckoning much. I made you where's daddy support, okay? Did you pay for this veto now? I paid for this veto. All right cheetah cheetah brand cheetah brand babies, okay? So I'm just kidding everybody pay your child all babies

By the way, all babies are inherently cheetah your brands let's be honest this little bald fucking okay use my DNA you use my DNA and you're gonna try to be a new person with it you're literally a shooter enemy oh okay so I'm starting to really get upset with this like we can't let's send a volcano it's we side stop it everybody over there stop But at this point is to if you were so fucking worried about that then what are you doing putting them on a show that you're profiting off of to use As a commercial for your fucking Tahoe restaurant over and over again now You know I love me some Lisa Vanderpump, but this is this is getting gross now Okay, this is a real issue and you guys are just using it for fucking, you know, appetizer sales at Wolf stop enough Okay, so Brock summer and Sheena are

You know summers crying as babies do so, you know trunk Do we need to take parenting advice from Linda from real house as a salt lake city get the trunk ready There's my advice and make out make in the front, crying child in the back. So Brock is cuddling summer moon giving her a bottle and she's like, do you want your frog? Here's your frog. So she gives her a little frog.

Well, that's one way to make that baby feel like mommy's always home. Christina does have that. Connor, she really does have that like, why are there so many songs about rainbows? Seriously, like I was a bus Friends with that frog and I cannot believe he'd left me for a pig Like literally like I don't know if you know this but like miss picky can like literally put up a TV inside of a manager loss

So we get a new song from Trixie just great Doesn't matter what I do. Nothing feels like I feel So we get a new song from Trixie, just great. Doesn't matter what I do, nothing feels like I feel when I'm close to you. Not even. That's a derivative of Lala's song. It's close. If you think about it. No, no, no, no, no,

like I'm feeling you. Like I'm feeling you. Like I'm feeling you. Like I'm feeling you. Like I'm feeling you. And nobody got me feeling you. Like I'm feeling you. I'm feeling you. Like I'm feeling you. Like I'm feeling you. Like I'm feeling you. And nobody got me feeling you. By the way, pretty good song. Yeah, that was a banger. Let's be honest.

That was a good song. That was a good one. So yeah, Lala is tucking her dog to sleep on the couch, tucking her dog in. And then the song keeps going. Nothing feels like a few when I'm close to you. And she's like scrubbing her kitchen. I love that Lala's love music is to her like using a scour pad. I know.

And then did you notice that then it cuts to like a private plane taking off? And I thought we were going to Vegas or something. I was like, what? But it was just stock footage of a private plane. And I thought, oh, this is a commentary about Lala and the PJ. The days of the PJ are over. There are no more PJs.

Now there's just, out goes the sugar daddy, in comes the scrub daddy, just a counter and some- That actually makes a lot of sense because I was wondering why they were playing this romantic song and showing La La using a scour pad and I was like oh that's she's probably remembering all the time she had to do this to Rand's back you know but you're a plane on a private plane that Bruce Willis's dementia paid for but your your theory is better I like it better well it could all work.

There's, they don't, they don't conflict. No one has to win or come to this situation. No one has to lose, it's all of the above. She used to be scrubbing daddy, now she just has a scrubbed daddy. Can I tell you something, and maybe the audience can help me? I can't stop sleeping on my face.

I keep trying to like sleep on my back, cause look, this eye is like swelling shut, because I'm constantly asleep on my face. I can trying to like sleep on my back because look this eye is like swelling shut because I'm constantly sleep on my face. I can't stop. How do you stop? Are you on your side? Yeah, my face like I sleep like this like I've splattered from a very tall building

and I wake up and my eyes like half swollen shut. Oh, you listen, it's karma for making fun of Andy Cohen all these years in his wonky eye. No, I've got this eye here is always a much more shut than this eye. Thank you, that makes me feel better. Oh yeah, I have it. I have an asymmetry. I'm gonna've got this I hear is always a much more. Really? Thank you. That makes me feel. Oh, yeah I have it. I have an asymmetry. I want to do like this Okay, this is what the problem with doing video you start staring at yourself Okay, so while I touch your talking, you know, if you wear readers it obscures everything just so you know

No, because it'll just make it look bigger You know Not yours, mine. But look, you can't see my eyes. I've got reflections in my eyes. Well, I find that when I wear reflective things on my face, it makes people look at me more because people are fucking narcissists

and they just wanna stare at themselves all day and that's like the only time people will look you in the eye and I don't like it. I like to be like in the background. Just me, you know, I don't like attention. Okay, so, Lala is scrubbing her kitchen and then the song about how everybody like is in love, is playing and then Katie goes to pick up Ariana.

And just in case you guys forgot that Katie's like a super cool girl who's really into like 80s grunge rave fashion at the moment. She's like, does it smell like weed in my car? And Ariana's like, no, she's like, good, wow, smoke and weed in your car, bad ass alerts. Sounds like someone is trying to harness that Tahoe energy. Trying to give Tahoe energy when you're just a late,

cause they, so, um, they were still in LA. That's such a random lake. I was like, I think of the lake as soon as possible. I like that even you'll even choose the biggest words when it comes to lakes because you really do choose some large words, um, just in general, uh, cause you like, you read the New York times and I've always really liked it. Like I Google what you're talking about sometimes cause you know, I'm ignorant, but I like that you'll even pick the biggest word to use as a lake reference.

Well, by the way, it's not a big, it's just a name. It's big. It's like, when you, when you drive up to, when you drive up to, to San Francisco from LA, you drive by a Casteig Lake. It's like this little lake that's by the side of the freeway. As you go up to the grapevine and the mountains above Los Angeles, and fun fact, there's actually a water museum there.

At one time I pulled over and I was like, you know what, I'm gonna go to this water museum. I always drive by and I went to the water museum and I loved it. It was a great museum. So to anyone driving that drive, if you're going by Lake Kastayek Or maybe it's Pyramid Lake. I don't know. But if you see a water museum

Go check it out. Listen, you may not have children, but you're everybody's dad If you ever wanted to know about the aqueducts that run through the Central Valley of California, you're in luck There's a museum on your way up to San Francisco for a good weekend of orgies and whoredom, be sure to stop at the water museum, okay? Go to the water museum. Listen, they have plenty of water there, so you can clean your sling before you go to Folsom.

It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crap-N's commercial. for a commercial. It's time for a Krappens commercial. From Wondery, this is Black History For Real. I'm Francesca Ramsey. And I'm Consciously. What do most people think about when they hear the words Black History? Rosa Parks, Reconstruction, MLK, February Black History Mom. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories February Black History Mom. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories of black history

that we just are not really talking about or thinking about, especially outside of February. And we are about to flip the script on all of that. Because on this show, you're going to hear a little less in August of 1492, Columbus, the ocean blue, and a little bit more. She is a heroine to some as a fighter for black rights. She is a villain to others.

Follow Black History for Real on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere on February 5th or you can listen early and ad free on Wondery Plus starting January 29th. Join Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Black is beautiful. Academy is a new scripted podcast Join Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, played by HBO's Industries, Myhalla Harald,

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me early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus. OK, so the toms are going to a store and it is the hatchet power supply and I've got my fingers cross for Terry hatchet because let's face it. No one knows where this season is going. But OK, I just like hatchet power supply. I like to think that there's like it's just a whole bunch of like extension cords to power an electric hatchet or to power a very hatchet store, you know, just Terry hatchet. Like she's exhausted.

She's worked a lot, you know, I run, I hate to do this to you. Cause in the spirit of comedy, it should always be yes and, but her name is Terry Hatcher, not hatchet. That makes more sense. You know, it wasn't really dingy in my head, but I wrote it down maybe when. You're like, why do I feel like my joke's not landing the way it should be?

Terry Hatcher. But by the way, your point still remains. It would have been wonderful if Terry Hatcher showed up. Like welcome to my store. Like she had, she opened up her own little grocery. She's like, I don't want people coming here to buy axes. So I changed it from hatcher to hatchet, which actually doesn't make sense

because now that is an axe, but I didn't want them to know that I was so agai. So you know what, let's just let it die. Not you, Terry Hatcher. I would love Terry. I love you. No, like literally I love you, Terry Hatcher. And I would love for her to open up a small grocery

in the valley and it's like, these are some of my favorite things. Carrot, carrot, oranges, they're in season right now. I just really love them. Quinoa, I know that's like been a thing for many years, but I'm just like still a big quinoa person. So there's that. And then this, these are actually just pipe cleaners and I just find that like sometimes you just want to do some crafting. So you know, I've got my carrot, carrot, oranges, my pipe cleaners, my quinoa. That is so- It makes me happy.

Just really makes me happy. Actress opening a store in LA, what you just described. And the occasional Pajmina. Right, like some, some sort of like jewelry. Right, a couple of cards. Like some jewelry that's made inside. You know? Yeah, that's a very, that's very actress in LA.

Okay. Um, It would be called Hatcher Uncompany. So, Santa was like, have you been to this store, dude? And he's like, no, but I hear good things. Oh, Hatcher power supply. And they're like, well, what do you hear for today? He's like, oh, I'm a scrub. I don't have any clothes. I'm in my Adam Sandler era.

Oh, that would imply some kind of success. Like. I don't, don't fly yourself. That's implied at someone at some point called you big daddy. That would imply that you somehow have something on your resume that says grownups. Or you could speak Spanglish. or you could speak Spanglish. So, what was the one about the gems?

Uncut gems. Uncut gems. I don't know, maybe some people have said that about him. We'll never know. So anyway, yeah, he is just, they're just at this place. Then we go to James driving with Graham Cracker. And Graham is like, he's got a little seatbelt on in the front seat of the car.

Graham just sort of sitting there. And James is like, I think this is so crazy. It's wild. I mean, you're in my car, Graham Cracker. Graham is my favorite boy. Graham is my favorite boy. You live in the high love, Graham. And that is but a house, Graham.

Are you so excited? Question, how do you feel about chemtrails because we got airplanes overhead? You okay with that Graham cracker? Graham doesn't seem to be enjoying this. I don't know, I said it. Okay, I don't know what's happened to Graham. Maybe it's just not being a puppy anymore.

Graham seems like he's taken some weed drops or something. I don't know if they're drugging Graham out to make him look like he's taken some weed drops or something. I don't know if they're drugging Graham out to make him look like he's better behaved so he's not sent to the glue factory because apparently he's a big biter. But Graham doesn't seem normal and he doesn't seem happy. And James is like tap dancing. Graham cracker eat sauce. I'm so glad to see Graham cracker. Well, I'm sorry, but it's not mutual.

Okay, your dog doesn't like you. So you're going to need to stop to the side and get some treats or something because that dog does not like you. Bend over, let him smell your butt. I don't know what you need to do, but that dog hates you right now, so figure it out. Well, we've all seen this horror movie.

Like, Little Timmy went missing, and then, great news. We found Little Timmy, and it's like, oh my God, Timmy's back, and then like, oh my God, Timmy's back. And then like late at night, Timmy's just standing in the hallway. And then late at night, Timmy's just staring. And then Timmy's saying things like, I'll never tell. And then Timmy's saying things like, I want to go to the park. And like something's wrong with Timmy.

No, he's my son. Nothing is wrong with it. It's Graham the changeling for fucking. Yeah. Angelina Jolie is just like, he's my son. Nothing is wrong with it. It's Graham the changeling. For fucking, yeah. Angelina Jolie is just like, that is not Graham. I'm telling you, look, it is Graham. We've got pictures with you in Graham. Look, it's Graham, it's Graham. No, you brought me back, Golden Graham's not Graham.

It's the cracker, it's the wrong one. I'm cheating on you now. I'm so sick of you insisting that this is a goddamn dog that it's not. Jennifer Aniston's like, here, let me just serve graham cracker, some vitamin water or smart water. Hey, graham cracker, do you wanna use some Juergens?

That's all I use. It's a hundred million air. Graham cracker, I'm so happy that you're back with your dad. Now, would you like to donate to St. Jude's? Okay, I'm going to stare at you until you feel guilty. So he's like, oh, I'm going to stare at you until you feel guilty. Sorry, more. Another thing that he is trying to convince everybody that he's super happy.

Now he does seem super happy with Ali. Um, but I don't believe it because he's really leaning into this thing like he's with Graham. Or he's like, Graham, I'm so happy to see you. Or it's like the good dog hates you. This is obviously not working out. And he's doing the same thing with Allie where he's like, Hey, me and Allie-Ballie.

It's me and Allie-Ballie. You're really trying to make this Allie-Ballie happening happen. And I have to say, I'm not necessarily rooting for James this year. I know I should because like, oh, he's making it ever, guys. Like everyone's like, he's making an effort. Here's why I'm not rooting for him. I don't trust him. He spits on doors and he's emotionally abusive to people.

And, um, frankly, he's not fun when he's like this. I need James to be miserable. So I'm hoping that he's just about to pop because it looks like he's about to pop It looks like he's about to explode. He does this But his he always has he has a season of like where he's a monster and then he has a season about I'm a good boy So we're in a good boy season. I agree. He's really trying to push the alley-bally situation here How about this could you not give your girlfriend like a nickname? situation here. How about this? Could you not give your girlfriend like a nickname

that like derives its meaning from a low end casino in Vegas? I mean, how about like Ali Balazio? Not Ali Bali. Ali for Seasons. Ali for Seasons. Ali win. Ali wino. Ali golden dog. What, I love that place dude. So Jameson. Ali circus circus. Jameson Ali, he's like, well I don't know what Ali Bali's gonna think

about this graham cracker, but we discussed you on a walk before. Let's take a look at it when they were walking that median in Burbank. He's like, you sure can't find this on the other side of the hill. What you like a dog? We can walk dogs on traffic means too.

She's like, I don't know. So now they're trying to concoct some sort of drama around Graham Cracker because he's like, I mean, Ali, Ali and I have discussed a dog and listen, I don't know how she's gonna react when I bring my ex's fucking dog into the house, but I guess we're just gonna have to deal with it, Ali. Ali.

Oh God, she's dealing with her ex's boyfriend. She can deal with the dog. I know, she's dealing with the entire fleet of Southwest flying over her house every five minutes. She's literally escorting chemtrails for breakfast. Okay, she'll be fine. So now, Kitty and Ariana are driving She is literally snorting chemtrails for breakfast. Okay. She'll be fine. So now Katie and Ariana are driving and Ariana's like,

well, sounded like this morning was eventful. I missed Penny's call, but I saw her text about the poop. And Katie's like, oh yeah, the patio situation. Poor Penny, the only person that actually works at this restaurant. Penny is the only person that actually works at this restaurant. Penny is the only fucking person on this show who's made any kind of effort towards this restaurant.

Penny is the one who had to clean up the pee. Yeah. Whoever, whichever one of you, whichever one of you got wasted at the Abbey and got on like when, like took some special KM pooped on something about her next door. I don't know whether I should be disgusted or at you or I should be congratulating you. I really don't know.

That's actually not where it is. Is it? Isn't it more in Beverly Hills? No, something about you is right down. Do you remember that restaurant like Headleys, I think? No, it's where it's that space. It's right down. It's like three blocks down from from, uh wait now I'm paranoid because you know you say something on here and next thing you know is

Okay, something about her location. I think it's on Robertson right there. I don't know. Yeah, it's just it's right there on Robertson Used to be a little restaurant. Oh, well cute That's why I don't understand why it's taking so long. We find out in the scene, so open your ignorance cause I'm about to tell you boy. So Katie's, she's like, yeah, Chef Penny sent me a picture of poop.

And she's like, you know, I don't wanna say things aren't going well with the restaurant, but someone did just poop on our patio. And Katie's like, we need a permit. Chef Chane like poop bags our patio. And Katie's like, um, we need a permit. Sheb chain, like poop bags for humans. Like, and we have to have a wrap because that has to be ADA compliant. And like, we have to get like ventilation, because I don't want it to smell like weed in there. I might be getting crazy single

Katie. And Ariana's like, I mean, there's so much logistical red tape. I mean, hello, if anyone's going to have any red tape, this could be my revenge dress, right? So who would I have to blow at City Hall to grease the rails a little bit, but it's West Hollywood. They're all gay. Yeah. And we don't do things for blue jobs. Those, those are like the easiest things to get.

Now we might do it for like some real meaningful conversation, but. Or Kelly Clarkson tickets. Let's talk about what the guys really want. Beyonce. So Katie is like, yeah, well, Logan's gonna check on glasses from pump. Guys, really?

You're taking five years. You can go pick out glasses downtown. You know what I mean? I know. So Katie is like my FOMO of missing this Tahoe trip, also known as like my personality trip. Is that a zero? And I'm not even sure, Tom Schwartz thinks

it's a good idea that he's trying to bring everyone together. I think he's just such a piece of people, please, or he doesn't want to leave anyone out. I'm like, she says that like he's such an asshole. She's like, fucking Tom Schwartz doesn't want to leave anybody out. What a piece of shit. So they're wondering, Katie was wondering what will happen

if they all come back as besties and Ariana's like, well, it'll be tough, but I have to respect my boundaries and I'm not going to be loyal to people who don't reciprocate that. Yeah, I don't blame you. However, let's see how they build an entire episode around Katie and Ariana driving around talking about permits for pooping at their restaurant. Okay. Let's see how much fuel they get out of this. Yeah. I don't think it's going well. I just, I was on,

I was on the gram today and, people, the tide has turned the tide has turned against these two quite. Oh, people are like, I'm sick of them. I'm sick of Ariana. Ariana's just so boring.

I mean, I know I should be on her side, but I just find her to be the worst now. So, and they all say that about Katie too. So that's what happens when you don't film with the rest of the cast. I don't know. I mean, really no one's,

no one's coming out like doing a shuffle off to Buffalo. You know what I mean? Like no one's coming out doing wings. There's no real showman this season. This is the season everybody's like, you know what? Let's just be sober and rent apartments in the valley and not have jobs. That's gonna make a great TV show.

Also Ariana's on Broadway, so she probably literally does. She does not care. And guess who else doesn't? Lisa Vanderpump, cause she's making you go shoot at the restaurant she's gonna use to replace your asses with. Because guess who's probably gonna have a show at that restaurant?'s going to use to replace your asses with because guess who's probably going to have a show at that restaurant. You know she is, you know, because Tahoe people, let me tell

you, they are not waiting for the next big thing to come into their life. Okay. The next big thing in their life is the Artemis restaurant in Spicewood, Texas, and they know it. So they are going to fuck and do drugs for all eternity and that show is gonna last forever Yeah Artemis Arta You'll never be a miss at Artemis so now we go to James and Ali's house and Ali is just like sitting around and James enters he's like, I have a surprise And she's like is that Graham shut the fuck up. Oh my god. It's Graham. He's such a Libra

Hi, Graham Hold on I want to do your reading Graham cracker. Yeah, he's a rescue now Apparently there was like a foster thing and it was like a pain in the arse and he wasn't well behaved It wasn't good Ali ballet. It wasn't good, but he would be a good boy now, Ali Bale. And then the animal that's going to take the house when the show flops this season comes over, Binks. And Ali's like, oh my God, Binks has never met a dog before in James, what are we gonna do?

I loved this moment. Well, because you know, I'm a big cat person and I love Mr. Banks being like, what the fuck is this? This is my chem trailhouse. I don't want this big floppy messy thing around here. What the hell? When she's like like that too, she's like, I love cats because they're in the pen minutes.

But like with dogs, it's like you have a kid, like your whole life changes. And then James brings Graham out to the backyard and James is acting like he's in one of those movies. Like he's Willy Wonka presenting all the children to the chocolate factory. He's like, Graham, This is your new backyard forever I'm like it's ashot turf and like cement and like cobwebs in the corner

He's acting like it was like that like it was the grounds of Buckingham. I was that the LA that shit's expensive I mean think about that's one point three million or something that house cost me my god Think about what we could have lived in as children. We've been like little orphan Annie getting to that mansion and just twirling around in circles. Like, I think I'm gonna like it. I mean, in this case, you'd fall in the pool immediately because like there's like astroturf for one foot in a pool.

But still I'm just saying, I know. Listen, 1.3 million. That is like enough to fund like two and a half Kimzolciac mansions. It's like enough to eat at Chili's these days. Okay? The man is really like $30. So, um, uh, Stenix Obama. So, uh, the dog goes outside. Better than Cheddar's. Is it?

Still mad. I'm still mad at Cheddar's. Don't stay mad at Cheddar's. So at the end of the day, Cheddar's is still going gonna be there serving carbs when they need them. So have some respect. That's true. That's true You were saying something So Ali is like wow he peed outside. He's talented Does Rachel know that you have her dog? Is she gonna be upset about it cuz like that's not cool her dog is she gonna be upset about it? Because like that's not cool. So oh, well, she doesn't get to get him back. He's our dog now. It's probably Lisa Vanderpump, which means this is Lisa's, which means

we're Lisa's little children now. We're best little boys. I was like, what does that mean? Is that Oh, no, I'm sorry. She actually says that's mean. But I but she said it with the energy of what does that mean? And James is like, is that mean? Yeah, I'm sorry, she actually says, that's mean. But she said it with the energy of what does that mean? And James is like, is that mean? Yeah, I mean, if someone took Mr. Banks for me after I lost everything, I would be so dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot sad. And she's like, yeah, it's not ideal

cause like last year it was her that was always around. And now it's her dog that's always around. I can't get rid of this girl. And then the moment that I've been waiting for all week, because it was my favorite moment of the previously is last week, is that Graham goes up to the screen door and stares down banks, and then just barks in Banks's face.

And I was like, I am into this rivalry. This is really working for me. Cause you know that back like, Graham thinks that he is like in charge, but there's a screen door there. And if there weren't a screen door there, like Graham would literally have a face full of claws in him right now.

Like Banks would have fucked him. Oh. Yeah, I'm team Banks on this one. I think Banks would win. Well, I'm not team banks because I don't want to see animals fight I'm team banks although I did watch a video of a lake panther or a river panther some kind of panther that can swim really well and It ate a fucking alligator like fought the alligator and it won and I saw the whole video I watched it three times because it was amazing got it by the throat and killed it anyway This video was less terrifying,

but I'm still kind of rooting for Mr. Banks, even though they've made Graham sound terrifying, cause all the discussion about this dog have been like, well, Rachel couldn't help it cause she went to the hospital or whatever. And then the mom took care of the dog, but then the dog was so violent because James taught it to bite,

and the mom almost lost a finger to this dog. Because it bit her so hard, like the bone was just sticking out of her finger, and I mean, they've really made Graham sound like Kujo. So to see Graham just being like, meh, meh, meh, meh, meh, meh, meh, meh, meh, meh, meh, meh, you know, like kind of going at Mr. Banks, who's like, you know, like kind of going at Mr. Banks, who's like, you know, like if he was a bank, he would be like a teacher's

credit union, like a small to medium sized bank, you know? And he's still going at it like he can have it for a month. But better than Bank of Silicon Valley or whatever. Yeah. Which is no more. They're so low. That was some commentary. We just know more. They still love you.

There was some commentary. I actually, maybe Graham needs Mr. Banks in his life. Maybe Graham just needs a cat to be like, you don't get to do that. Poof, you know, because also by the way, this is so fucked up from Mr. Banks. Mr. Banks is sitting here in this cute little bird bank home, planes going overhead, he's in his happy life,

and all of a sudden this big flopsie, flop, flopsie. I'm gonna make, I'm gonna say that's a word, flopsie. This big flopsie dog comes in with this toxic masculinity, just acting like it runs the place, barking at Mr. Banks. No, it doesn't work like that. So anyway, Allie't work like that. So anyway, Ally's worried about this. She, he, Ally's like, like, Graham, no. And James like, Graham, no, don't do that. Don't worry. Let Ally, belly. Let them have a moment. Let them have a moment.

They just need to have a moment. That's all just a little moment. That's it. Ally, belly. Just don't worry. He just nips, just little nips nips. I don't want nips from my dog. He doesn't hold on, he just nips. Oh, okay. So the violence isn't prolonged. It's just short stabs of a... He doesn't cut you open, he just stabs you short little stabs until you bleed to death.

Come on, Allie Valley. Get rid of Allie Valley. If you bleed to death, it's because you didn't get band-aids in time to plug all the holes. All right? And then and then Allie goes, no that can't happen. And James goes, well, no, do I want the cat to scratch him? I'm like, wait a second.

You don't this is not a like both sides. This is not a what about is this is why you never trust James because underneath it all, this is still who James is. You bring a terrorist dog into the house who ate Rachel's mother's hand off. I mean, the woman has a hook now. Okay, you bring that into poor Allie Balli's house against her cat and then you're like,

well, I don't want my dog to get hurt by your cat. You are the one who brought the aggressor into this house. You don't get to make this. This is why you never trust James. I don't care how much he says he's changed or how much ice cream he's eating instead of, you know, rails of Coke. Okay, I don't care.

Don't ever trust him. Yeah. Don't like, let's like, I saw this stealth campaign to frame Mr. Banks to be some sort of violent out of control feral cat. No, no, no, if your dog barks at Mr. Banks, Mr. Banks has every right to take that paw out and do that thing that cats do on TikTok,

little pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, which by the way is the funniest thing when cats do that to other animals. I love when they do that to you about. Tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink. Or when they do it to just to a friend they do it that's just to a friend. They've got one of those um One of those um, what are those paddle ball things? It's got like a little rubber ball that's tied to a rubber band and you just like pad it up Yeah

I guess do that the best Not certain battle like when they do it to humans, but when they do it to other cats, especially or to a dog Yeah, I like that too You remember those balls that they were trying to sell that like strap on to your wrist or something and then you hit the ball Kyle Richards was doing ads for them with her family and I was like You know just like smack her. Oh good times. Okay Here comes one right now So she's like he better me hammer He's going back to leave says and then we cut to the dog who I think is now barking at a leaf in the pool or a turtle

Which was it? I think it was a little ball. I think it was a little ball now But either way Graham was staring at the pool Sort of having an existential moment at the end. By the way, Graham is adorable. I feel like I do wanna say, Graham is adorable. I feel like I never appreciate it. I don't think that's even fair. It's like, oh my God, that hot, blonde, 20 year old girl,

size one, she's forgiven whatever, cause she's adorable. That doesn't count. She was born like a beautiful hot blonde. She still has to not bat people in the face with her, you know? Oh, no, of course not. But I'm just the hot, beautiful blonde is batting people in the face. I'm just saying I'm just saying I feel like I never really appreciated

that Graham is adorable before. I always thought like, oh, it's another dog. But this time, I don't know, like I think it was something about Graham sitting in that front seat with his tongue hanging out. It was really cute. He's a very cute dog. I think I was really cute, but totally unhinged and wild.

Talks are like babies. They're all precious and adorable and special. I need banks to put Graham in his place, and I think that will solve a lot of things. Yeah, God forbid someone raised that fucking dog, you know, okay, so let's go back over to hatchet supply So Schwartz is like whoa look at these pants These are made for Tahoe and he's right about that because if ever I saw a pair of pants made by it to patchouli swillin

Hippy Tahoeite a truly swollen hippie. Tahoeite. Black and hippie, recurring theme. It's foes. Yeah, so yeah, he really likes these. And then Sandoval's like, ooh, I'm like vibing with his hat. So it's good to see that someone is vibing with Sandoval

still, even if it is just an inanimate object. She was like, that's cool. So then he gets a text from Jesus. I don't remember who or I actually, Jesus, well I wrote down Jesus and I just went to Jesus place instead of Jesus, but I don't, who is Jesus? Does he work at the restaurant? I don't remember Jesus.

I don't know. I imagine he's behind on his rent though if he works for the restaurant because it hasn't been going well over there from what we hear on this show. So, it's a headline. I don't know, they complain about money,

but isn't Schwartz like, I like this shirt. It's $500. Wow. Jeez. How much is hatchet supply donating for you to jokers to shoot here? $500 for a shirt from a place called hatchet supply. Oh, fuck off. I know. Well, you know, Terry Hatcher charge is about $30 for her Caracara Orchard. Her Hatcher shirt. She has her own Hatcher shirts. It's got like a Superman logo with like a no smoking sign over it, like a no, no Superman. She's all better still. So Jesus, why don't I keep saying this?

Don't you think she hates Dean Cain and Terry Hatcher? I feel like if Terry Hatcher saw Dean Cain in a crosswalk, she'd run over Dean Kane and she'd be like, you were hot once and then just speed off. Yeah, yeah. Man of steel, man more like man of pussy run over. So then Santa Claus, so he's like, whoa, did you see this Rachel's back to her birth name?

Call me Rachel, that's what the article says. And Santa was like, oh, well, I knew about the Rachel thing, but wasn't my place to reveal that. And I'm a gentleman, so just wanna get that out on camera. So now he's gonna go for this whole thing where every time somebody says something about, Rick Kelly's gonna be like, yeah, there was a secret I kept, cause I'm a good person now, dude.

Yeah. He's like a Rachel Hipster. Whereas any time the piece of news comes out, they're like, yeah, I knew about that already. Yeah. So another headline, Raquel Labis leaves a mental health facility after two months. Yeah, I knew about that. I knew she was out like,, like, because I went to, like, send her a text message and instead of it coming up green, it went through blue,

which means that her phone was like turned back on, okay? And he sent a text that was like, hey, I don't know if you're out yet, but just want you to know I'm thinking of you and I hope you're okay. And I'm like really vibing with this hat right now. Bye. $500 for a hat is totally worth it. Do you wanna go to Tahoe? So he got no response. And then he tells us, so this is what's so funny to me. He goes, I think that like once I didn't hear from Rachel on my birthday,

I started to really think that like something was like going on and she was purposely not talking to me You literally just said her phone was off See, this is the thing her phone is off She's at a facility where her phone is off You know it's off because you just had a whole spiel about how the bubbles went from green to blue And then you're actually gonna hold it against her that you didn't write right back to when her phone was off sir Yeah, well, I think that he was thinking, you know,

if she could get away and like send me a postcard with lightning bolts on it, the Ariana would find that I totally purposely let her find so she would get really upset and like leave the house furiously so I could get to keep the Lego painting of myself. Oh, man. She would, but since I didn't even get a postcard on my birthday, I guess it's purposely dude

She's in a fucking mental facility because of the drama your bullshit Caused okay, and not to say that she wasn't part of that bullshit as well, but she's even more of a Dumb dumb than you okay. You were definitely the person of power in that relationship. What the woman grieve, okay? Let her she's trying to At least ostensibly fix herself, which is more than you're doing sandball But by the way, were you vaguely surprised to hear that Raquel even had blue bubbles? I just sort of thought she might be more of an Android person No, I don't think she would know how to work in Android.

Android, do you have to like really know how to like, well, I haven't had an Android in a long time, but I used to love it. I got one because I wanted the galaxy note because it was like the first huge phone, the phablet phone or whatever they called it. So I got one of those and you really back in that, I mean, that was a long time ago, but back in that day and age, you really had to know how to like sideload shit, you know, or like, I have to learn how to boot the new software on my phone, bro.

I have to know some MS-DOS prompts, you know, to get this thing going. Yeah, it's for smart. Whenever I see people, I feel like when you see people with Android phones, you're like, but when I see them, I'm like, you're so smart. Cause you know how to like really fix a phone from the ground up. Cause I feel like you really have to know how to tinker it up to own an Android. I'm snobby about it, but I'm only snobby

because I just need to find anything to make myself feel better about something. Oh, damn. Have you seen your face? Oh shush. So, uh, Sam DeVall's like, and then on top of that, like, her publicist is sending my calls to voicemail, like, she doesn't even want to face the world. Schwartz was like, well, I can't blame her.

I didn't want to face the world, and I wasn't even part of it. I just want to, just want to highlight to everyone, I'm not part of this. I have nothing to do with it, stop accusing me. I can't believe that a publicist wouldn't want anything to do with someone who completely wrecked her client's publicity. It's not weird.

That's so crazy of a publicist. So Santa was like, to be fair, the publicist was Peter Hedgidahl. He's like, everything's going a lot better, publicity- publicity wise. Now that you're here at the mirror vault, but, um, we should still date. You want to date? She's like, no, I still don't want to date you. Sure. Cause I still think you're hot.

Just, just wanted to let you know. Wow. They've really shunned Peter, by the way. Peter, I guess grossed everybody out some last season. They're not even showing Peter taking the occasional table. He'll be back. Shunned Peter by the way Peter. I guess gross everybody out some of last season. They're not even showing Peter Taking the occasional table He'll be back. He'll be back. He has a great storyline now of the time He almost got run over in the street by someone driving a car on the way back from a bagel shop

Okay, man a man in a keyhole with a fresh bagel touching his lips fresh bagel touching his lips. That would have been, that would have been, if I ran over Peter after we were the ones who started the whole starter pony thing, man, he would, he would have, he would have so much to be bitter about. So Santa will let us know what he's worried about. He's like, dude, I just wanna have fun, dude. Okay, well, maybe let's stop bitching about the person who's in a mental facility, okay?

I lost Graham Cracker, okay? So, by the way, I hate that I'm even sticking up for Rickle at this point, but I think when someone is in therapy and making an effort and also being completely tricked by that hyena ghoul, Bethany Frankel, that we should feel something for them, you know, our fellow nominee for the I Heart podcast sports. I have to say that I don't feel bad about standing up for

Raquel because we all know on this show, whatever you stand up for someone, it's provisional, it's context. It's like, you know, when you play video games, they say that like there's context buttons, like the but like sometimes when you're in this area, like link will jump in Zelda and sometimes if you press the button link will climb. It's all context. It's just that sometimes you just need to have someone there to be against Sandoval. So it's like, okay, Raquel is right now. The context is that Raquel will take Raquel's side. But like, so the answer is yes, I did just compare Raquel

to a button you press in Zelda. And I hate those stupid buttons. It's like, I, this is the button punch. Unless you're close to a wall. Like have fun climbing instead. It just makes me feel like such an idiot. It's like, okay, well, Ronnie's near a wall better have him climb. Cause he's too stupid to figure out a button combination, which by the way,

it's like they can see me because that is in fact the truth. Um, okay. By the way, I've been working on my, I've been working on my link climbs, a wall and Zelda impersonation. Here it goes. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, um, Santa Claus just wants to have fun and shorts is like, I'm really sick of my neck out here. This trip goes bad. Oh, everything's going to go to hell. You know what we're going to do? We're going to jump into Lake Tahoe. It's cleansing. Yeah, we know that you consider lakes cleansing as that's the only bath you took before your Wednesday wedding, sir. Okay.

Still not cleansing. You still need to take a shower. You're getting married. That lake is still polluted from when you threw yourself into a river and sent all your Schwartz, Schwartz mess into the lake. So Schwartz is like, I just hope our little trip is like a fun, lighthearted, wet out American summer. And then Santa Claus goes,

hey, you guys have any knives? Oh man, I hope it's not like they're shining instead. Okay, so then we go to Sheena and Brock. That's funny, because I misspelled his name, BROK, which is so much more fitting. The name fits him now. Bro, Sheena and Brock. So Sheena's like, this is one of my favorite stores, my bathing

suits Brock. And he's like, Oh yeah, me too. I know you did you know? I love a bikini bottom. And it's one of this is, I think we finally made it to Zensations because this was definitely Zensations because the store had a had one of those like cutesy doors where it's like a half door. They have a name those doors. They have a name, okay? But I don't know what they are.

You know where the door can, like half the door can open, but half the door can stay closed. So it's almost like you can have like a little coffee shop situation there. So it's like, look, welcome to my cute little, welcome to my cute bathing suit shop. I'm Terry Hatcher, come on in, check out our selection.

So they go in there and Brock, so she was like, so Brock, why don't you like pick out something cute for me? Like I can give you like a little passion show. And he's like, all right, well, I've got some party, party pins similar to that. So we can wear that together if you want to because we are with the command, no. And she says, well well I'm definitely feeling

anxious about going to Tahoe because like just leaving summer every time I have like mom girls and like but I can't talk about that like spending a few days I like the same house like saying oh like just give me like a lot of anxiety like is he gonna try to like talk to me is like Ariana gonna be upset like what's gonna happen um so I don't know, I forgot what her thing is called, like OCD, postpartum OCD. My mom had the opposite of that. She had me and she was like, by now she was out of there.

She just like left me on a fucking ironing board. It's a jettid. It's like, see ya. So she's still talking about this. So Brock's like, okay, but I thought we had Tori. And she's like, no, because Tori also nannies for another family. And then the other family just had a baby.

So basically, Tori has a baby now, so it's not going to work out. We're going to need to start off. Did you not know that Tori nannied for another family and that lady was pregnant? Why were you pinning your hopes on Tori in the first place? OK. Now, they can say whatever they want about this OCD and I'm not even doubting it.

It's true. We've had a lot of listeners talk about their own experiences and stuff. So I'm not even joking about it or saying it's not true, but I am saying Sheena is just a cheap ass and she's trying. She does not want to pay somebody and she wants her mom to do it for free. Why would you pay the cow when you get the milk for free? The babysitting for free, the baby sitting for free? I think that's a dating.

Why would you buy the cow? That's for dating anyway. But you know what I mean. I don't understand also, Tory, you're an actress. Why aren't you staying with the famous couples and nanny with? I don't understand that. Tory just doesn't have a purpose.

Oh, she's gonna fuck two of the cast members later this season, so just do it. Well, I don't know if fuck, but hook up or later this season. So just do it. Well, I don't know fuck But you know hook up or flirt with heavily. I don't know. I don't know what the previous are telling me We're just 94 Well the frustrating thing is that we put all this big into finding a nanny and I finally get the okay from Sheenor and then all of a sudden It falls three with big square one and so he's like he just wants to find someone That's not a family

member not a friend he just wants to get someone who's professional because also when there's someone who's like professional you can like yell at them or fire them and then it's just like they're out of your life but like if it's the mom you can't yell at the mom without it being a drama that envelopes your whole family for months to come. So he's like let me just hire some children. Okay now granted he's doing it in a way that's more acceptable to society this time and leaving them with somebody, but that's really all he wants out of this.

Okay. He's like, get me out of here. She was like, um, I'm going to go like tension to her by the inside. So Brock is like, she's changing and Brock is saying, look, we're newlyweds and all I don't think the top of the China's to saying, look, we're newlyweds and I don't think to talk with the chain is to go, yeah, we're married. Let's have a kid and let's get the mother-in-law here

to a house every other day and that's not a knife. This is a knife, you know what I'm saying? So that's not a nanny. This is a nanny. You have a little crocodile dandy in there. Love it, love it love it nice work Bubble bubbled out so now she comes out in this bathing suit looking of course like slammin And she's like oh, but look I still have this and she's like manages to find a tiny piece of skin that she's able to like pull out

She's like I'm gonna get a one piece. It's like but yet a kid. What are you talking about? So she go the lady is like, you look really cute in it. She looks like that. And she had one kid. I look like I've had the cast of fucking Oliver. No, I don't even know what the cast of Oliver. Tons of kids, tons of kids, like hundreds of kids, dirty kids. Now, do you mean Oliver or Oliver and company

because Oliver and company would have a lot of adorable little dogs. It was a dog. Cats was a dog. I didn't watch that one. It was basically James's house. I don't like Oliver. I don't like dirty children singing. You know what's so funny is that I was just, please sir, can I have some more?

No, no, you can't. I was on Instagram last night and someone put food glorious food on their Instagram story and it said from the Oliver the cast of Oliver and I didn't realize that that song came from Oliver. Oh yeah it also comes from that great musical Velveeta. Cheese glorious cheese. Was it Velveeta who used that? Maybe not to be confused with one of my favorite food oriented songs. Someone made a star just for me food and parry him food and parry him. Wow. So she's talking so now they're fighting because Brock's pissed and he's decided he's

gonna make a mark this season and have a lot of lines. So he's like, look at we leave the baby with a good done nanny. She's like, I'm there, we are in a bikini shop. He's like, I don't care. We're screaming in front of the bikini lady. And then the poor traumatized bikini shop worker is like not making enough money for this. She's sitting in a corner literally picking at the skin on her like her cuticles. You know, she's bleeding by the time they fucking leave. She's this woman is like,

has nowhere to hide in this tiny little kiosk of a store. You know? She's mortified because I mean, look, when you have a door like that for your bikini shop, you're trying to set a tone of like, hey, welcome to my cottage that's in the Alps that you're gonna buy a bikini in, not like, hey, welcome to my den of, of acrimony

and people yelling at each other. Welcome to my actual place in the Alps where there was no escape from mommy and daddy yelling at each other. Eugh, cuticles! Where are my cuticles? I'm just trying to figure out why you feel like no one is can do the job as a nanny. I'm never really the cutest job I've ever done, y'all. But there's a fucking reason it's because you're paranoid from your mom, and you're paranoid because your mom tells you Not good enough they go down that rabbit. Also your mom starts double the answer

I'm also you know good enough a parent makes you want I believe in anyone else I'm Brock. There's like a bikini is around don't yell from the bikini By the way stop mom shaming the mom moms are supposed to make you feel like you're shitty at what you do aren't they Part of that's how they love. Okay. Yeah. Mom shaming Sheila, whatever her name is, you know, that lady has a right to tell Sheena she's a terrible mother. It's called the nature channel. Watch it. Okay, it's called our planet. Give it a try. Yeah, you think you think that Panther went and killed

an alligator without some talking to us from mom? and killed an alligator without some talking to's from its mom. Lady in store is triggered, I wrote. Hello there. This is a two part recap, okay? This is the end of part one. So thank you so much for listening to this. Just come back a little later for part two.

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