Watch What Crappens - #2339 PumpRules, Part Two: Wolf in Sheep’s Loathing

Episode Date: February 28, 2024

*This is part 2 of a two-part recapNo one wants to hang out with Sandoval on Vanderpump Rules (S11E05), but Lisa’s wolfy restaurants don’t promote themselves. So, it’s off to Tahoe for an awkward group trip full of sledgehammers, bee stings, and Brock in a kimono.  Is this the first step towards Sandoval re-entering the group? Grab tickets for the Netflix is a Joke Fest in LA and our European tour at watchwhatcrappens.com Watch this recap as a video and get our bonus episodes at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously, but hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Hi everyone, welcome back! This is part 2 of a 2-part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, we'll go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe. But enough of that, let's get right back into the episode. Okay, so now he's yelling about the mom and then you notice how Sheena has a way of getting out of everything.

She's like, oh my god, we are arguing in a bikini store. I will not argue with you in front of a show. So he's like, that's just optics, babe. You're just worried about optics. Yeah, the optics of having some man yell at his's like, that's just optics, babe. You're just worried about optics. Yeah, the optics of having some man-yellow that his wife in the store are bad optics, you dumb shit. That's more of a lie. So, she's like, just stop talking. So now they're outside and he's like,

I don't want someone else coming. Oh no, she's going, are you kidding me? I don't want someone else coming in. And you talk like this and I don't want someone coming into our home when you talk like this. So now she's using because it's how he talks. She's like, so see, this is also why I don't want someone coming into our home when you talk like this. So now she's using because it's how he talks. She's like, so see, this is also why I don't want someone home. I don't want someone in our home who sees you talking to me like this in a bikini store.

Okay, maybe it seems circular, but it makes sense in my head. Talk like what? How I've been screaming for help for months. Help, help, help. And then I take out my didgeridoo and I send out an SOS with didgeridoo. Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. So then Schwartz comes over to Katie's apartment

and it's just like they're married. I mean, I feel like this couple is basically still married. They're like the Kyle and Mauricio of the show where I just don't believe it because I think they're still in love with each other as ever because when he comes in, she still gives him the same greeting she did when she was totally in love with him. She goes,

It's a love language. I started making out with like the back of my elbow. I was like, it's so romantic. out with like the back of my elbow. I was like, it's so romantic. Katie's like, I'm going to pray for you guys. And that was the end of her scene. And then Lala, we go to Lala's apartment, her mom, Lisa's there. And she's like, yes, some mom gets what some might. So guess what? Arianna and Katie are the only ones not going to link to how.

And Lisa's like, and how do you feel about that? She's like, I feel a little weird about that, mom. I would feel weird about that too, Lala. Thanks, mom. That's why we're like best friends, mom. No, you're my best friend. You're like my daughter, but you're like my best friend, Lala. You're my mom, but you're my best friend, mom.

Yeah, you're my best friend, mom. And then we go over to Sandoval with my favorite character, Ann. He's like, sell you these outfits, gonna help if I get punched or stabbed? She's like, oh, you're wearing red pants. Oh my God, those are so cute. They're so red.

I mean, I guess I'll help if you get, you know, stabbed by somebody because they're red. You'll be bleeding and that's presumably red. I mean, are you not human too? You're not bleeding. God, I bet you bleed so well. Yeah, great job. Great job with those pants.

Hey, I was wondering, could I have a lunch break? I haven't eaten in about 62 hours. So just wondering. Great, good. I didn't want to eat, eating is bad. Eating is bad. It's so bad for me. I'll just be here ready, But you'd attack me something.

So now we go to James and Alebelli and they're packing and James like, well, am I supposed to be packing? I'm packing like black jeans. We're going to a late James. Oh, okay. Well, guess what? I just dropped Graham off at the PJ place. That's right.

It was too late to add Graham on the plane to get Solis offered to bring Graham on her private jet. I was like, I love that Gram gets to go on this private jet where there's more than enough room for several people. But no one else will have to take him south to west. Um, I'll take dogs but not mongrels. I'll take rescues but not rescues. So then we cut to Ken on the plane.

This is mouth wide open, snoring like Ken Wood. Can you believe? Rachel stayed over at Sandoval's house and they all know it's out of town. And dipped out apparently. Goodbye, Kyle, goodbye, Kyle, goodbye, Carl, goodbye, Carl. Lisa, Graham is just sitting next to Lisa and she's like, oh, Graham,

have you ever been on a private jet before? Have you? Would you like to poop? Do it now because this way we have just enough time to drop your poop right over James's house. She's like, you're doing such a good job on this flight, Bartholomew. I mean, Graham wink wink.

Quickly, someone spray Graham his hair dies coming out. Wouldn't want anyone to see that he's actually a labradoodle. He fused Angelina Jolie gets the more hungry she gets for goat cheese balls and our sales go through the roof. Keep it up Barthie. Hey James, are you nervous to see Sandoval? Cause I'm a little nervous about it because he's gonna shit himself when he sees Graham, right? He's like, what? You think he hung out with Graham or something? You think John Sandoval hung out with Graham? She's like, yeah, probably more than we think.

I mean, he was fucking your girlfriend for like how many years? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. I mean, Graham did come back to us with a lightning bolt necklace. So now we go to LAX airport and everyone's gathering. There's like really fun, cool, like visual effects on the screen. And then they got on a plane to Reno. If they land in Reno, they get a rental car in Reno. They drive to town.

Yeah. They do everything that ends with an angel. And she's like, last time I flew to Reno, I was checking out a wedding venue. Let that be a lesson to you, okay? So then, Van Der Pumps is still talking to Oliver. Well, first we think she's talking to Garcelle's son because she says, oh, Oliver, you're so handsome. I was like, wow, she's really making Oliver happen.

She's bringing Oliver to Tahoe. But no, Oliver is the name of her handsome wolfie wolfie. Yeah, or maybe she turned Oliver into a wolf. Maybe she is like one of those like special powers like Oliver, you've proven that you are not reliable as a waiter, but I will find you a new life as a wolf. So, uh, yeah, there's enormous, enormous wolf. The second wolf on our radar in like two weeks. Cause last week on the traders, Dr.

Will appeared with a wolf. So a big wolf energy happening on NBC these days. So Lisa's taking a picture with the wolf. I don't know if I would have been, they made this wolf look so cute, like this happy, adorable wolf, like just happy to be there smiling, having a great time. But I'm like, it's still a wolf. I don't know It's like a wolf dog because then remember she was taking dogs with She was taking dogs. She was taking pictures with other dogs that were like kind of a wolfish breed

It's not like a real wolf. It's not like on game of thrones It's a big dog. So it was yeah, I. I was like, it was just so doggy. That wolf turns in one moment and you're done, Lisa. Okay, a couple things. One, wolves don't make me hungry. I know wolves are hungry because they eat children. Does that make you hungry? Yeah.

Also, Lisa is taking a photo shoot with animals while she's wearing fur, which just seems wrong. Could you do this on maybe a bear skin rug? I mean, Jesus, how insensitive can you be? I know. And also, this is not what I'm thinking about it. When she was on the private plane with Graham, she had Graham lying down on a blanket

that looked just like Graham's own fur. I was like, this lady's sick. She's a fucking sicko, dude. Yeah, Wolf is a sort of a strange, strange turn. Like all her restaurants have like a, like a gaudy kind of thing, like sexy unique restaurant, Pump Villarosa,

Vanderpump Gardens, and then Terrace, and Roses, and Champagne, and Bubbly, and Rose, and then all of a sudden, Wolf. It's sort of his little, doesn't quite doesn't work for me so then she's like oh wolfy mr. Olive I love you so much I named a restaurant after you he's like Oliver no wolf so I feel super special now I have a name you just named it after

I've been open a restaurant for you called Human. Wouldn't that be flattering? Don't go through the actions of naming me and making me feel like I have an identity and then just name me some, name the restaurants of engineering. You don't understand how this, what this does to my psyche. Name the restaurant faceless. Sounds great.

Yeah, love it. So Lisa's like, oh, there's nothing shy about my new restaurant. And it ain't for the faint hearted, that's for sure. It's exactly what Tahoe needs. It's going to be sexy. It's going to be masculine. It's going to have oversized clock pendulums, courtesy of Nicolain. It's going to be a big, bad, woof.

Oh, hold on, I've got a call, I've got a call. Oh, it's the children, hello, you little hoarse creatures on Southwest, is it? I'm just doing a photo shoot with wolves from my restaurant, Cold Wolves. He's a little on the nose, is it? My name's Oliver. Oliver, you can say that you're having a photo shoot

with Oliver, that's my name. Life is good with me. How is it with you? Everything's good so far. Like I got to the airport and saw them all sitting at the bar having food and she was like, hey, we're over here. And I was like, whoa, she's being really nice to me.

And then I realized that she was talking to the cameraman but like I just like pretended that I was a cameraman and then I was like so that means she really was talking to me so like it was cool man. Schwartz is like yeah they were finally giving him like hey maybe you can sit with us kind of energy you know oh it's such good energy. He's like it was so awesome. Oh god. I am human. I have tears. energy Okay, you don't have to lay it on this sick for fuck's sake my god She knows willing to sit next to you while she had half a bagel at a fucking airport restaurant. Okay

Question that didn't sound like quite a large meal would you say that you are hungry hungry like a wolf also known as Ken's hair inspiration drun drun thanks a song that's not about me in any way shape or form what is it my birthday yeah how about hungry like a lover I got hungry too. You know what sometimes I just want a salad Mm-hmm, so then Schwartz is like, oh my god, are you crying santa ball? Just let it out man Let it I mean wow. I don't blame you I mean just to get a hello from the people who were disgusted by your very essence That's nice, so now santa crying in the confession I am I am remember

Sorry I am She doesn't say how to meet the airport like that It just Seeing her waved me over to the to the Panda Express Express, I just felt like I never thought it would happen. And then when Lala was like, hey, come over here to Hudson News. And she gave me one of those little good-dive bars.

I was like, I can't with his crocodile tears. He's so fucking ridiculous sitting there in his first lady from the 60s jacket. Like he's sitting there, sobbing, trying to be a Harry Styles. Like I can't with you. Just shut up.

Okay. I'm not in the place where I'm ready to forgive you. I don't care what this cast says. So let's sing a song. Tell me when you're gonna stand up and show me, show me when I'm gonna take a malla, a-la. I'm doing a dance. So they arrive at the rental house and James like, I want like, let's go.

And I was like, it's gorgeous. And she was like, oh my God, I'm like, ready, let's go down. And they're all excited and they're choosing rooms and everything. And James like, Ali Palli, you know, I do to claim a room. You do this. And he does like a swan dive onto a bed. He's like, aren't I fun? I'm a fun boy. Ali Palli, you know I do to claim a room you do this and he does like a swan dive onto a bed

He's aren't I fun? I'm a fun boy So Lala's like hey Swatch is Thanks for putting this together for us and like having a fun Dispickings with you and he's like well, I don't want to jinx anything, but I feel like There's an air of peace, right? So I'm Sandoval you're not gonna cry. Are you? He's like well wait, there's a camera. Hold on Hey, Sandoval Remember remember when we went over to the Chick-fil-A in the airport and they said it was closed on Sundays?

Why'd you do that? Oh, I didn't feel like that to my Chick-fil-A. All I wanted was for a cup to pray for me and I couldn't even get that. Hey, remember when you went to the in motion kiosk and you got some air buds because you left the ones you had at home? I felt so excited. I remember, but then I said, ah, the only thing I'm motion around here are all of your friends and going in motion away from you.

Why are you crying? Why are you crying? By the way, it's not Chick-fil-A that has prayers on the cups, right? That's in and out, isn't it? In and out, does that? Sorry, guys. Got my prayer cups mixed up. Okay, so. Chick-fil-A's just closed on Sunday

and donates to anti-LGBTQ organizations. Right, well, you know. So Brock is in a Speedo and a flowy robe now. This is where he gets into his Mrs. Roper outfit. The look that he needs to stay in for the rest of the season if you ask me. So he's like bare-chested in this kimono and then he's like this speedo is barely containing his manhood okay like there's like a gap between the speedo and his

skin it's like very hot so he's like oh can she he's just like taking off his socks or something and she knows like um can you like not do that? What do you mean? They're both my socks and underwear. Yeah, just leave your pink undies there Pink underwear And he's like well I'm sorry. I tried to do laundry shank. I totally don't do laundry I mean don't do things if you're just gonna fuck them up. You know what I'm saying Don't say that aren't you recording an album Like let's have some positivity in this relationship. Come on guys.

So it's like, yeah, just like your wife, dude in laundry, and by your wife, I mean my mom. It's like, oh. Well, I didn't intentionally fuck it up. It just happened to go in something and then pink and then now there was like a sweater that was pink and now the white stuff is pink. And she goes, yeah, and now half of your PJs are pink and then out now that now there's like there's like a sweater that was pink and now the white stuff is pink and she goes yeah and now half of your PJs are pink instead of blue. Well the lesson here is whoever's in

charge of laundry should have done the laundry. Is that the lesson? I think the lesson here is check the laundry when you put it in the machine. I have not learned that lesson. I still do it every time. And you know, here's my shocking thing in life. Why haven't they figured out how to make laundry not bleed all over each other yet? Like why can't I buy a pair of jeans without turning everything in my laundry

that's white or light colored blue? And why is this still like that? Like I feel like it's 2024. Like don't you throw the jeans in a tumbler first or like wash it first? Like come on guys, let's be better about this. I shouldn't have to worry about this shit anymore. We're trying to save water now.

Shut it all in one thing. Be better. Be done with it. Be better. Be better. Bondry. So, Sheena is basically like saying that they're not over their argument

but they've decided to put a pin in it so that they can enjoy this trip which they're not over the argument, but they've decided to put a pin in it so that they can enjoy this trip, which they're not enjoying whatsoever because they are furious still about the bikini shop. So now, Santa ball is in the kitchen and Brock goes in there and he's like, hey, what's up? How's it going? Nice outfit, bro.

Oh, thank you, really. Yeah, pretty cool, man. Like you vibe in with that, come on, another way I vibe with that hat earlier today? Was that $500, dude? And he's like, how you doing? He's like, um, you know what, like I'm cool. Like I just wanna like live in the moment. Yeah, people who fuck up all the time do.

That's what they wanna do. Yeah. That's usually what caused this mess in the first place. People who suck don't wanna live in the past. You know, I know that's really rough for ya, but guess what? They're still parking tickets. Okay.

And it doesn't matter that they happen 20 minutes ago. You still have to pay for them the future. Yeah, it doesn't matter. Exactly. So Brock is like, well, it's hard on the group, you know, to figure out how to get through this weekend, but none of them really felt head. It's because obviously all you had to do is defend your actions. Brock, man, I don't want to go here, man.

Well, but look, how do we have a good weekend when you walk into a room and you feel like this? It's like, oh man, it takes a second. But like, I'm already feeling better, man. Like I got a people magazine, that's the news. I'm like moving up in the world. She had to say hi to me and she had like a sesame, sesame seed in her teeth. It was like, I'm gonna cry about it. He's like, whoa, don't cry yet, bro,

because you put everyone in a bad situation. He's like, okay, okay, like what I did was, whoa, wait, what we did meet Andrew Kelly, because it's not just me, right? Like we did, it was bad, okay? But it was like, maybe it was malicious, but we didn't do it with malicious intent. Which is my favorite thing that he's ever said.

And I can't believe he's still saying that. Like the first time he said it was just so intelligent. He's going to just continue to say it. Like he watched one law and order episode and now he's off the hook because he didn't have intent to murder. You know, it just happened. It was manslaughter, bro. Come on.

Yeah. So he's like, yeah, but what we felt, we were like the things that were done towards us had very specific malicious intent. So, okay, so you want people to have a nice reaction to you doing out something absolutely terrible. Right. Because theirs was malicious, but their malicious, their malice came, it was based on your actions. So you don't get to use that justification. Like you dumbass. Yeah, it's like, he, and he doesn't understand

that this is what is preventing everyone from like moving forward is that he, he doesn't seem to, he's creating a false equivalency here and he can't get past it. So James walks in and Santa was like, Hey James, I just wanna say like, thanks for being nice dude. Really appreciate it.

You're like really nice. He's like, yeah, well, I know I want to keep the positive vibes going and yeah, I'm just, I've gotta do something in my room right now. I gotta do my hair. Gotta do my, oh yeah, by the way, I have to do my hair. Gotta go, bye, see you later.

I'm cool, I'm cool, I'm happy, I'm happy. Alley baly, alley baly, alley baly, alley baly, alley baly, crumb go. Bye, see you at speech later. I'm cool, I'm cool. I'm happy, I'm happy. Alley-Bally, alley-Bally, alley-Bally, alley-Bally, alley-Bally, alley-Bally, crum, crum, crum, crum. She's about to pop. So Brock's like, Brock just keeps going it. Now here's the thing. Sound of all, I would love to see

Sound of all get yelled at all season, which by the way, looks like it's not gonna happen at all actually, but not by Brock. You know what I mean? Like you just got here. no one hurt you, Brock. But I actually think Brock's way of doing, I think Brock was actually really good in this moment cause he's not yelling at Sandoval

and he's not like, he's not being like, he's not tiptoeing around Sandoval. He's just being like, okay, well here's the situation. You know, you got like, he was kind of just like not allowing Sandoval to just use all his, all the shit that Sandoval used with Lisa and everything, right? So it's a listen, your feelings are valid,

but you got to understand that other people involved in this thing and we're not your enemy. We're just people who have no respect for you. And we're just very, very hurt friends. So Sandoval's like, yeah, but like, bro. Oh, he's telling us. I feel like they want me to grovel, but they're feeling. Oh no, he's telling, is he telling Brock this?

I don't remember who he's saying. No, he's telling us. He's telling us. They want me to grovel, but they're feeling to acknowledge how they treated me, trashing me publicly, selling merch, coming up with conspiracy theories on podcasts. I mean, this isn't just about

them forgiving me. This is something we all need to move on together. You do remember that you sold tickets to the show where you randished an oversized lightning bolt necklace, so you were capitalizing off of it too, so that's enough out of you sir there is a one-way ticket to shut up mountain that is ready to depart and he's thinking so he's like all right it's time for a commercial it's time for a crappin's commercial academy is a new scripted podcast that follows ava rich, played by HBO's Industries, Myhalla Harald, a brilliant scholarship student

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And that's kind of awkward. So he's like, well, okay, well, I want to say thank you to everyone for being so friendly to me, dudes. But like, I want to build on that. So in that spirit, I have a girl coming over tomorrow to do some guided meditation for us. Yeah, it's like yoga and movements and props. Oh, I'm a big fan of it.

And James like, I'm a meditation specialist. Great. And James like, a meditation specialist. Great. That's exactly what Sandoval would do. Mr. Trahoi, Trahoi, Trahoi. Allie, Allie, did you hear that? Grom, Grom, Grom. He's like, dude, guided meditation has been like a solid replacement for alcohol for me.

Bullshit. That's such bullshit. You cannot drink a meditation, okay? I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person.

I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person.

I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm not a good person. I at least a good person out there. And so I totally forgot. Yeah, well, you know what?

That's not a call you have to make forever, you know, because even so even with myself, who's committed to sobriety, you know, because I had to be sober because of after everything that I went through. And you know what was so crazy is that when ran cheated on me, I went through a similar thing. It was such an adjustment, you know, being someone who is the victim of cheating, if anyone wants to talk about this, anyone want to talk about this story?

So anyway, like something I want to do is like, I want to experience everything I experienced while I'm drinking, but while I'm not drinking. And Shorts is like, but not sex, right? God, why do you have to fuck it up, dude? Okay, like, I mean, look, like there's never been a day where I've like not been drinking So I guess like everything I do Is kind of doing it for the first time without a drink like fucking do

You know it's like me I feel the same way it's like I want to experience everything I normally experience with ran but without ran because it's funny because I'm not even with ran anymore. Cause we actually had a catastrophic break up. Oh Jesus. Okay. Jesus. So, um, James is like, okay, guys. Okay.

Cause we hear a little bark because that the pump is coming. I can't believe she's even dating to come to this comparative shithole to the manter. Nino, she's staying in the middle of the comparative shithole to the mansion you know she's staying in, in the middle of the lake, you know what I mean? But she's like, Hello smelly paws, I've brought a dog. And James's like, guys, I've little news.

Come here, Graham, quacka, Graham, quacka. Are you joking? Is this like a joke? Is this like when I found out that Ram was cheating on me? Is this like a joke to everyone this like when I found out that Ram was cheating on me? Is this like a joke to everyone? No. Graham is ours now. It's so Libra of him.

Lisa saved him. And she saved him from me because I'm her best little boy, basically her son. And Lisa's like, oh yes, yes. Graham is very good, but goes slowly with him. He's not used to being around poor people. He adjusted very quickly to the private men lifestyle. He has been with Raquel's mother,

and remember, this is the woman who put her daughter on a boogie board on a stage and told her to wobble back and forth like she was actually riding it. As her talent portion of the competition, it couldn't have gone well for poor little Gramity, Gramly, Gram, Gram. Poor Gram's been in Arizona for four months

and he's gotten so used to seeing ladies with ketchup and mustard highlights in their hair. So he's a little alarmed to see your single color hairstyles. Just give him some space. Now I just want everyone to remember, Gram has been due trauma. Poor Graham! So he humped another puppy in Arizona.

Just in his nature. Let's please all forgive Graham Duval. We've got a show to profit from people. Wolf isn't going to pay for itself. So everyone gives, everyone like hugs Graham and is like, and they're all happy and short like, wow, he was in the gulag. And I'm surprised gulag has not been invoked before

on Vanderpump Rules because there's so much about Vanderpump Rules that feels very gulag forward. So James is like, so guess what everyone? I was thinking of naming him as Tippi as a tribute and they're like, oh Okay, and then he explains the name hippie is an homage to my great late godfather George Michael's dog hippie That was the dog I would see growing up and I was never allowed to not to name a dog growing up Oh, no, I wasn't even allowed to even have a dog

So now flash forward to me as an adult and I'm allowed to name my dog whatever I want because Lord knows I didn't pick rum cracker, so hippy it is. Not only do I have a dog now, but I also have a reason to tell everyone I'm related to George Michael every single day that this dog is alive. That's literally the only reason why.

You can why don't you just get another dog and name that dog hippy? because I think Graham is at this point Graham is Graham right like is that As a dog owner Ronnie Are you? Is it worthwhile to rename your dog like four years in four or five years in I don't I mean I don't know I Wouldn't I wouldn't but I think that that's fairly normal when you adopted dog. Now, when you adopted dog that was your dog the first time around?

I don't know. I don't know if you get that much of a view over, but I don't know. I feel like it's, I think grandma's grand. Grams is grand. I'm sorry to say this. Yeah. Grandma's grand and get another dog and that dog will be good.

I mean, you should walk around with this, the name you, the stupid name you were born with. But you know, that does lead to this conversation that they have on the show, which is like, well, if for Cal can go back to her original name, then Graham can get a new name, which I don't, I don't know. I don't care. I guess that's not a good thing to say. I think it's, I think it's ultimately, like you said, I think it's just a way

for him to be able to highlight his connection to George Michael. And by the way, you know where I was when George Michael died? Arizona. Were you? I was in Arizona. Did you bite Rachel's mom? I did. And I haven't been back since. So, um, James is like, yeah, you know, like, um, well, she and I saying, oh my God, I've never seen James so happy.

Oh, no, I guess they're talking about the dog. I've never seen the dog so happy. I've seen James that happy. I mean, I've seen him with the netball. So it's pretty hard to compete with that. James is like, yeah, bro, my mind has been blowing. All right, this is what happens when you can't handle it and you go away for a shot, Peter, the time, stupid face can't handle it.

Well, anyway, he's my little buddy and he's back again. He's back again. And Santa Claus like, you know, I definitely know what James is singing in regards to Graham and like that's like not the case. He's basically saying like, I know the real story. So then Graham just starts rubbing his ass on the, I like the patio, which doesn't that mean that Graham has worms is not the sign that you're doing

But it also is the sign that Tom Sandoval no matter how much he's pretending Is he's a good person is such an absolute piece of garbage shithead that the girl he fucked and whose life he helped ruin in Assistance with herself. Okay, I'm not passing the whole buck there. But that girl who had to go away to get fucking mental health treatment after all of this because her life was ruined, had to get rid of her dog. Why isn't he helping with that dog?

And when he knew that that dog was in a bad state, he just let that dog get adopted away. So stop with your pretending to be a good person, sir. Okay, the least you could have done was walk the fucking dog in a lay a few times. So Ali, don't you? I mean, at least you could do his dog sit

or find someone else to dog sit. What the hell? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I think Ram, I think Graham. I think this is one of the few moments where Sandoval had the good sense not to if he was walking Graham, that would have been such a shit show.

If he was caught walking Graham. Well, I, well, it's already a shit show. Cause then it'd be like, no, I have to watch my dog get walked by Sandoval. Well, woman, the mustache walking dog. How could it work? Well, it's less of a shit show than like we've, you Claus, we're women, the mustache walking dog. How could a woman walk a dog? We'll slice of a shit show then like, we've, you know, we got this dog and we let it be sent to, you know, the fucking kill shelter or whatever,

because I'm too much of a weakling. And, you know, I know that he did that other show that's super important to him, but JoJo Siwa could have walked the dog, okay? Now that's someone who would have loved to walk. I think maybe Grant, I mean like she would have, you know normally like you walk the dog to talk her out the dog, but like I think in this case,

I think JoJo Siwa would need to be the one that needs to be talkered out. She's like, okay who wants to go on a walk? We're gonna go on a walk. They're gonna twirl. Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da a tang down the street. So she knows, yeah. So anyway, they're talking about how happy is and Santa Claus. Like, I have a secret about Rachel, but I'm not going to tell everybody cause I like, I like need James to pretend I'm his friend, even though I'm going to like totally blab on him in two episodes from tell everybody

that Rachel's a real victim of this dog situation. And James should never have access to that dog again. Yeah. So, um, everyone's sitting at the dock and Schwartz is like, wow, well, that, great, I'm coming up, that was like the plot twist at the day, but yeah, well, you know, it's just different. I guess Rachel's not coming back this summer, huh?

Or Raquel's not coming back this summer and Schwartz is like, it's Rachel now. And then this is where Allie tells Santa Ball. So she wants to be called Rachel now Yeah, she told me that a while ago like I kind of like aren't you know about it? So I guess like whatever Like he has access to this information. It's so weird that he's doing it Yeah, why doesn't he just say yeah, I guess so like why does he have to keep on

Saying that yeah, it's like making him sound like a better person in his mind somehow, but I'm not really sure what it is. Is it like, wow, I have gossip that no one else knows? Or is it like, Rachel's like a huge star now and she's on magazine covers and I know what's going on with her. Or, I mean, what is it? It's weird.

Maybe just trying to prove that they have a genuine relationship. It wasn't just that kind of thing. I guess, yeah. So this is where Allie is like, well, if Rachel can change her name, why not Graham? Graham DeHippie, new star for everyone. And he's like, yeah, that makes me feel certainly, but I'm not going to say anything.

She's like, yeah, I guess it's like sad, I guess, but whatever. So now it's Frolicking in the lake. They all jump in the lake, they swim, they have fun, they frolic, all that good stuff. And we go back over to Los Angeles where Ariana is walking around the house and she's FaceTiming Lucinda,

who is their interior designer. And basically Ariana says that like, she's come around, like, so they were gonna sell the house and then Tom decided that he became obsessed with buying her out and then she didn't wanna do it, but now she's come around like, so they were gonna sell the house and then Tom decided that he became obsessed with buying her out and then she didn't wanna do it but now she's come around to that. But the problem is that they got all this furniture

and was jointly acquired, which I think is such cruel irony because the first year that they had this house, there was like an ongoing storyline about the fact that they had no furniture and people were like, why don't you have furniture? You should have furniture. You guys don't even have furniture. That was like a whole thing with Jacks, right? Like you guys don't you have furniture? You should have furniture. You guys don't even have furniture. That was like a whole thing with Jacks, right?

Like you guys don't even have furniture house. And now here it is. They finally got the furniture and now it's the bane of their existence. Well, I guess because they couldn't, they were so bad at getting furniture they had to pay someone all this money to like get their furniture.

Cause like no one on Vanderpump rules should be paying a designer to design their house. Their farmhouse and the valley house. So it just seems weird. It's a show about waiters. You know, it just doesn't make sense. So now they have to get rid of all this. And Lucinda is not helpful at all, right?

Because I think you call her because you're like, well, what should we do with all this furniture? You can help us sell it, right? And she's like, no. I mean, I can help you take apart the Lego painting of yourselves. I didn't know that was even Legos. Did you? That's so bad ass. I want a Lego painting of myself. Everyone Lego artists out there. You have your marching orders. So cool. Wait, Ronnie, why don't you make

one? This feels like a run. Legos are a whole thing like people are like back into Legos, because they have the Lego show where you create massive Lego things. And people are into it, and so my kids, my nieces and the boyfriend play around with it, but I don't really get it, and I'm not good at it. And I don't think you just paint the Legos.

They're Legos that are put together with different colors, right? To make your face. I'm sure there's like a tutorial out there on YouTube on how to make Lego art. Or maybe there's even an app that tells you what Legos you should put, like you put, you upload your photo and it says, okay, get this made Legos and put them in this way.

I guarantee it's there. I'm just basically saying this because I'm just flashing forward to this weekend. You, like, this coming Monday, how's your weekend? Who is good? Well, of course, man, you put that in my head and I spent all weekend buying like 5,000 Legos and I like put like set up a thing in my garage

and I started making a Lego thing. Oh, you never know. You know what it's like to plant a seed in my brain. I'm planting the Legos seed in your brain. I think it's sadder though if you do it for yourself. I think if you're like, oh my God, this artist did this thing for me. But if you're like, do you feel it?

I made myself into a Lego painting. It's like there's way more of an air of sadness to that. Self portraits, baby. I mean, look at Van Gogh. I mean, Van Gogh is sad, but his self portrait, mage, it's mage, but do it a beuler. Make one a beuler. Okay, so then Arianna is- Make one a Brock and a kimono. Yeah, I know.

So, she's walking around trying to figure out how to get rid of this shit, and she's like, oh my God, and that credenza, that was custom. She's like, that's going to be a real bitch to deal with. And then we see the romantic memory of them putting a credenza in their bedroom where Tom could make her, don't play in the lightings. That credenza was such a thing because when they got it,

they're like, we're like adults. That was a big adulting moment on the show getting that credenza. And now look, now it is their albatross. Here's my thing. Lucindainda just send over receipts that's all you have to do receipts proof timeline screenshots fucking everything okay so now we go back to Tahoe and shorts gets done by a bee finally someone someone takes an action finally there's someone who watches the show in Tahoe. I know. Finally a friend breaks through.

Basically it's the Monica Garcia. This is reality Bon B and it has snuck onto the cast and taken shot. And Sheena and Lala witnessed this and their reactions are hilarious. Cause Lala's like, you just got sung by Lala's like you just got stung by your beats Like you just got stung by a beat you got stung by a beat. Did you get stung? Did you get stung? I thought it was a wasp. I thought it was a wasp. I thought it was a wasp. It was a bee. Oh my god. You got stung.

There's wire-wishers. Ha! You got stung. I got stung. I'm a mom's snouse. So I care about stuff like that. I'm a mom's. Rand once got stung. I got stung. I got stung by Rand when he loved me, or actually when he cheated on me. I got stung by love. Stop paying for that one. So then James and Allie are in their room, and he's like, did I see you talking to Chon? What was that about?

Allie, balie? And she's like, actually I was like, how come the dog can change his name other than Rick Hall? Like she can change her name too, right? Cause like the dog didn't just, you said that, that is hilarious, Ali Bali. Ali Bali, you're actually the funniest person on earth right now.

So then she knows FaceTiming Summer Moon. Hi, Angel, guess what? Daddy's right here. Daddy wants a hug. Oh, Summer's like, Daddy, I wanna hug. So he kisses the camera, which is not a hug. It's a kiss, it's fine. And their brakers, I boil it away.

Now that we've hung up on your annoying mother, I would like to apologize because it's bothered me ever since we went shopping for bikinis in that strange shop with the half door. Or I guess I should be more aware of my surroundings. And I guess that includes red sweaters that are in the whites part of the laundry and just cared not about just my feelings, but yours, Sheena.

Yeah, he's just like sick of taking shit about his laundry colors. He's like, all right, I'll apologize. She don't make fun of my laundry skills anymore Right woman. Thank you. So then We cut back to Schwartz and he's like well I haven't been stung since 1996 And then we get a new song there's just really pumping out the music this year this one goes There's just really pumping out the music this year. This one goes,

feels like the more we get, the more we lose. The more we get, the more we lose. Dead Irish Hooker. It's a song dedicated to the credenza. Yeah. Commercials, here comes one right now. So, um, they are, they go and they head to Wolf by Vanderpump. And it's Lisa Vanderpump. She's got the old sledgehammer taken down a wall while Nicolay and Maestro watches.

She goes, oh, look, my sledgehammer went right through it. I'm like a regular pizza Gabriel sledgehammer. I love that Lisa is still doing the opening scene of every property brothers episode ever and thinking that's like the most compelling television she can come up with. I know. Look at me putting a hole in the wall.

Mm-mm. Magic. I think it's time to maybe retire the Sledgehammer demolition scene on Bravo. It's not nearly as annoying to me as Bad Tennis or the giant waxing or cryotherapy or the I'm opening a mediocre restaurant. How about that? But I think the Sledgehammer thing is yeah. So Lala's like, oh my God, look at this place. I've never seen body for your restaurants like this,

like when it's in this state. She goes, of course you have darling. You saw Tom Tom. She goes, wait a minute, did Tom Tom look like this? She's like, yes, I mean, there were dildos everywhere. I remember dildos in the window. I mean, another behind the bar. Get it, dudes! dildos everywhere. I remember dildos in the window. I mean, now they're behind the bar. Gertrude!

Still got it, darling. Hi. Ken, Ken, it's your darling little son, James here. Where's the DJ booth going to be? That little tiny thing in the corner there, right there. So it's easier to go up to it and knock it. Spark out! Gonna knock it, spark out.

So then it is time to scream about something you're angry about and then, like use it like a rage room basically. She's like, everyone take the Sledgehammer and bash into it and tell us what you're frustrated with. It can't be Sandoval. That's the only way. You can't bash Sandoval.

All right, with the Sledgehammer, but otherwise, go for it. So James goes up first and he slams the wall and he goes, I've looked up to Graham better. I was hoping that his Sledgehammer would bounce off the wall because I just feel like that would be so James to like not be able to get the Sledgehammer in

and then he cries and he gets his spirals But he does and then Schwartz is like I don't want to be single and 40 and stung by a bee Ah, oh god, and they're like all that's the saddest thing I've ever heard and then she me got serious Brock is like colors the de bled in laundry. Oh! And then Santa Claus is like, okay, I'll go guys. So this guy has the balls to go up there with this ledge hammer and start saying everybody else. He's like, scumbag and cheaters, that's what they called me.

Warm with a mustache, Charles Manson's son. And the mother goes, goes oh yeah I did call it that and then he just goes it's Sandovo could admit he was wrong I would seriously start listening to him that's all it takes I'm fucking sore and she was like I'm how about you hit the wall for your actions, doll, zing. And then Zinnabelle's like, James Kennedy, man. And so they're all like, okay, wow, like it blame everyone else, but you blame everyone else. And he gets away with it. They just like sit there and watch him do it and basically tell everybody else off

and be the big victim. And then it's like, okay, let's go have a drink. So they are walking past this big wall. It's kind of like a Vegas restaurant, right? With the like closed food. Cause I think they're actually in a casino. Oh, is that what it is? So that's why it's in Tahoe.

I saw some Harrah's. Okay, okay. Yeah, I saw some Harrah's signage. Okay, that's why they're in Tahoe. So, yeah, so they have like one of those big walls you pass, it's like under construction coming soon. Wolf. And then it says,

feed me to the wolves, but I'll come back. The next year leading the back or whatever her tagline. That's what it's called. Wolf. That's what it is. That's the connection. Good. So do you think Kyle's going to leave Beverly Hills and

Van der Pumps going to come back? Cause otherwise that tagline kind of sucks. You know, like she has to come back at some point just to prove Kyle wrong, even if it's just for half a season, right? Um, I think she should come back because why not at this point? I mean, it's just, I say come back when Kyle's at her lowest. Oh darling, did your marriage fall apart to Mauricio? I seem to remember someone had made a joke about that one time and she was nearly

run off the show. If only someone played by Patricia Arquette with terrible box dyed hair could have warned you about that while puffing on a fake cigar. Oh you poor, poor, want-to-be lesbian. We got that while puffing on a fake cigar. Oh, you poor, poor, want to be lesbian. It would be though. So. I don't know why I put a piece of candy in my mouth. While we're recording.

I've had this Werther's Original. What the, who does that? You love those Werther's. I've had it on my desk for two weeks and it's just, I've never noticed it until we're recording. And finally I'm like, I'm gonna fucking suck on this Werther's Original. No guys I'm recording I can't do that I'll just stare at it again. Yeah. But god that tasted good for a second. You can go back to it.

You can go back to it in about uh two hours when we finish this. No shit. So okay but it would be a good time for it to come back because not only is Kyle miserable, but Dorit and Kyle are miserable. So Dorit would jump back to Vanderpump's side and because Vanderpump could also help get PK back on Dorit's side. And Garcelle would be nice to Vanderpump. We know that. Sutton would love Vanderpump, I'm sure.

Kathy loves Vanderpump. So girl, this is your time, darling. Get in there. This is the moment. This is the moment. This is the moment. Okay, so they all sit at this table and Lisa's like, okay, let's get this party started. Come on, and nothing says starting a party

like Ken Todd and Nicolay and get in here, men. Yeah, so it's time to have an awkward dinner where nobody has anything to say. And they're talking about what they're going to do. Maybe they'll gamble later. And they're giving Lisa shit for wearing her third outfit of the day. And then they talk about Graham and how James is different. Just like Graham, he's so calm now.

And, you know, just a lot of small talk. And she really realized what a character on this show alcohol is because these people really have nothing to say to each other. They don't. So they're asking Schwarz, like Lisa was like, by the way, Schwarz, you really struck me when you hit the wall. And I don't mean just the metaphorical wall, cause you did that many years ago, probably when you were 22. Your limits. But anyway, you said I hate being single at 40. Do you think that

maybe you're a little bit of a broken bird right now? And he's like, oh no, no, no, it's not as tragic as that sounds. And I was like, yes, but like, are you really singles? Because like, aren't you and like Joe like fully together? He's like, yes, but like, are you really singles? Because like, aren't you and like Joe like fully together? And he's like, yeah, sure. It's like, be honest, like, Joe is like his friends with benefits who like doesn't love with them. No, no, no, she doesn't live with me.

She has a house, house with a garden, a garden that grows olives and olive garden, if you will. She loves her olive garden. Finally, a restaurant named after me. No, Olive, not Oliver. It's like, damn it. The wolf just can't catch a break. So he's like, I don't have the emotional capacity

to be in a relationship. I'm single and not ready to make a... Okay, so you're fucking this girl, Joe, and just pretending you're getting pity. Just pretending you're a sad sax. You'll get pity so you can get laid more when you go out. Got it. Typical fucking shorts.

Also, Tom for me. Tom Schwartz has never had the emotional capacity to do anything and then hasn't stopped him from doing everything. So, um... So Sandoval is being so Sandoval. He's like, hey Brock, selfie time. And he takes a selfie.

Like that is, that is assault. assault forcing someone to do a selfie with you when you know that that's going to make them a fucking pariah when you post it is not. No, next week, that's. It's such a piece of shit. Like I was like, this is setting something up. This is going to be a thing next week. Like, oh, I guess that Brock has friends with Santa. Well, I know it wasn't this picture, particularly. I don't remember what picture it was,

but it was a huge deal when they were in Tahoe and people were being photographed with Tom Schwartz. People had a fucking fit about it online. So he knows what he's doing. It's such a piece of crap, this guy. Credit to the cameramen or people or women and the producers, because they get this absolutely amazing shot

of Tom Sandoval now. Like the sun is shining Sun is shining on his face like this orange glow and he's like looking over at Lisa and he has such a fucking evil look on his face it is an absolutely amazing shot it was and then it cuts to Lisa and she also has Sun on her face but she just looks like Angelic and she's glowing like I'm Lisa Vanderpump in the Sun Oliver be sure to open up that window more. I need more light on me. Yes, ma'am. This is so funny.

So he gets a selfie with Brock and then he goes, yeah, I don't ever just like take selfies for myself. Oh, okay. He's like, yeah, I'm only taking a selfie because we're both in it together. Okay, okay. There's Tom, the not vainvame-it-all Tom. Yeah.

He doesn't like to center himself in any sort of photos or conversations. So anyway, they're just like talking. So Santa, Lisa's like, oh, James, this is a feel-good factor that past couple of days wouldn't you say so? You got a dog, I gave you a dog, So guess what you have to do what I say. What is something you like about Sandoval? Cheese that feels little awkward Lisa. He's like, I mean it's even more

He's refuses to answer. He's like, I'm not doing this right now. So he's like, well, I felt put on the spot, but then I mean, you've got to think how badly just Tom Sandoval feel put on the spot. I mean, it's just embarrassing for him. It's like, oh, so you guys made up, huh? You made up by the time you did this interview. God, you guys are so weak on this show. My God, you can't hate someone for more than five fucking minutes.

Jeez, a practice. No, they want to, they, they are focused on the long game. So Brock is asking about the house and Sanneville saying that he gave an offer to buy out Ariana and basically saying that Sanneville saying he hasn't spoken to Ariana since the reunion, but he would love to talk with her. But if it's just going to arrange her, like if it's gonna enranger, I just, I don't wanna do that. Oh, so now you don't care about enraging her, okay?

Something you should have thought about before you cheated on her with her best friend. Yeah, so later they're having drinks after dinner and they're all like, wow, look at us. We're so mature now. Like no one's gotten in a fight. No one's throwing a drink at each other's face. Yep, we're still on TV, so... Isn't it fun?

It's going great. Those ratings are just racking up over there. So then, um, Sound of All takes James for the dreaded chalk. Yeah, he's like, I want to acknowledge his feelings, but also remind him that all the things he did to me, man. So, um, I don't want to cause any problems and I don't want to create hostility. I just want to coexist and like when, when I, when it went down, I was like scared to talk to you, man. It's just like so overwhelming, James. It's like, well, but it doesn't give you an excuse, dude, to deceive Anta Patre.

Yeah. And he's like, well, no one wanted to hurt anyone, dude. And he's like, but you didn't want to, but you knew it would, Tom. And he's like, yeah, well, you know, I mean, what was ever gonna come of this that would not be catastrophic. So James is like, you really thought, you know,

you really don't think if you just made an effort to actually end things with your girlfriend and then date Raquel, like you didn't think if you just made an effort to actually end things with your girlfriend and then date Raquel Like you didn't think maybe that was a good idea and he's like oh, it's just so easy for people to say that Yeah, sure. It's really easy for you to break up with someone But which by the way people reminded us This in the comments Tom was going on interviews on the how I Mandel thinks specifically I think this is where this came from where he went on and he was like,

how was I supposed to break up with her? She was threatening to commit suicide if I broke up with her and using her mental health against her. And then here he comes on the show like, Oh, you can't be mean to me. I've had thoughts of suicide. So that's funny. Yeah. Well, not funny, but like look at the way he uses it. Also, like,

what part of like, I don't want to break up with her because she's going to threaten to kill herself. So then you're just going to cheat on her and humiliate her on a much larger stage. There's those people with all that stuff. That will somehow be better. That's for that. That'll be somehow that she'll be able to take that. To real confidence.

No, like no one said it would be easy. It's not easy. That's the whole point, but you like it's the right thing to do. And James is like, well, if you really wanted to walk out the door, you have to say, you look at an eye and say, buh-bye. It just comes down to not being able to man up and leave the relationship. And he's like, no, but like, Arjen and I have built our entire life together and it might be easy for you to do that. And he's like, but if it's what you wanted, if it's what you really wanted, you would have done it, which is correct, because anything that Santa Claus really wants to do, he does.

He's like, it wasn't that simple. We have a brand. He's like, it is that simple. You fucking idiot. So what are you gonna do? Are you gonna be with Raquel when she comes back? And he's like, I don't know, man. I come torn between resentment and love.

Oh, he's resentful. Why is he resentful? She's resentful because, you know, in the end in the Biblicality. The girl that always tempted the man, always. Right. You know, they make someone out of my McRib and then they tempt me and then before you know it,

I'm the one in trouble for eating the McRib. You know it wasn't just about Rachel it was about getting out of a relationship that I know wasn't suiting my life. The path I was on was not a good path. I mean do you know what it's like to be in a relationship with someone who's like just like supportive and like really cool like that's a terrible path to be down okay needed to change man he's like it wasn't about getting out of a really listening it wasn't about hurting someone it was about doing something positive for myself what about my mental health i wasn't a bad place man cheating with my life raft so this guy's such a fucking asshole. I can't. And people who were just like,

oh my God, how long are you gonna punish Tom Sandeval? This is it. This is why. This is what a fucking piece of shit this person is. Don't you see? He doesn't realize. Oh my God. He really warps the narrative there.

So James is like, listen, I've never had a real friend in my life and you were supposed to be the most trustworthy person. You were the guy and that all went down the drain and he's basically like, Sandeval was the one person who was never, ever, ever supposed to fuck me and was never going to fuck me over. And then he did. And it just blew my mind that someone could backstab me like that.

And Sandeval is like, yeah, well, I have to embrace like what I've done and say, like, yo, don't ever do that shit again you fucking idiot And by again, I mean for like a third or fourth time. And you know what I mean like no, I'm saying man So he actually says I'm sorry. He actually stops himself and says I'm sorry James I'm sorry and doesn't follow it up with anything else Which I think was actually the most impressive thing he's done to date on this show and James is like, you know All right Well, I need to take it in, you know,

like, because we had such good times. And then we see clips of the good times they had, including Sound of All throwing the engagement party with Cela for James and Raquel. She's just so fucking creepy. So then James is like, you know, that's why I've been so angry, bro, because you would like my brother.

And he's like, all right, well, we'll get through this. And I promise, I'll listen better. And then they hug. So there's the rest of your season. Enjoy. Here it is. Here it goes. And then next week, it's Gina calling Ariana.

Be like, you know what, though, like, I can't keep like hitting him just for real. And Ariana's like, so it's turning. It's so quickly. Oh my God. I thought that would at least make him work for a season, but nope. It's like episode four or five or whatever. Wow.

Yeah. So that's, you know, we knew this is exactly what would happen and it is. So there you go. Anyway, everyone, thank you so much for being here for this extra long recap. Somehow we've got to say so. So at the crappies, I did a we did like a Barbie theme this year for the crappies, which by the way, are still available through this weekend. If you want to stream them, go do it.

But I did a I'm just Ken number, but I made it about Tom Sound of all, and I am putting it right now at the end of this recap. Instead of awesome song. So I want to put it out there because I recorded it. So why not? So no, you did a great job with that. So it's here it is. Um, but before that, go get tickets because you can still watch it and go get

tickets for the Netflix is a joke, comedy festival and our European tour over at watchwhatcrapins.com. If you would rather watch this on video and in one part and without commercials, that's on Patreon, okay? So go check that out over there. This week, I think we're doing Summer House as our bonus episode,

because there's a lot going on on Bravo. So that will be on Patreon as well. And thank you's a lot going on on Bravo. So that will be on Patreon as well. And thank you guys so much for being with us. We will talk to you next time. Bye. Bye. It doesn't seem to matter what I do. I'm a piece of number two.

Call me out and I'll fake cry. Oh, I had feelings that I can't explain. For a girl without a brain, now I'm welcome as old trash. And blame it on the stash, cause I'm welcome as old trash And blame it on the stat Cause I'm just Tom Can't even get love from Swartz's mom Is it my destiny to live and die A life of Tom fragility?

I'm just Tom Coming soon till your daughters calm What will it take for you to see the man that lies behind the scandal underneath? It wasn't about sex, it was a connection where we were both respecting each other and giving each other confidence. Who's that? Sure, I could have broken up with you, but emotionally it was like climbing Mount Everest with your emotions.

I want you to know I'm here for love, our fake story of things. Is it a crime? Am I not hot? I'm not hot. I'm not hot. I'm not hot. I'm not hot. I'm not hot. I'm not hot. I'm not hot. I'm not hot. I'm here for love, I'll fake the real thing

Is it a crime? Am I not hot? When I shit on your feelings Here's my calm of mind, they hear why are you screaming? I'm Gross Frostreamer I'm not lying, all 100% take a polygraph It is malicious, but I did not do it with malicious intent Can you feel my energy? If you cared that I was cheating. Feel so good my energy.

You should have followed me. Can you feel my energy? When I first kissed her. Feel so good my energy. I said, hey, maybe you're not washed up after all, dude I'm just calm, and I'm in us And I'm great at doing stuff So hey, well check me out, cause I'm just calm

My name is Tom and so it is And I'm staying in Christ So hey, well check me out Cause I'm just calm I'm just calm Hey Prime members, you can listen to Watch Our Crappens ad free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen ad free with Wondri Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondri.com.