Watch What Crappens - #2345 The 2024 Golden Crappies, Part 1

Episode Date: March 5, 2024

**This is part 1**Time for the most important awards show of the year, The Golden Crappies! Get your ballgowns on and your limos gassed up, because we’re honoring the best and worst that Bravo had to offer this year. Thanks to everyone who came, who streamed and who celebrated with us! Grab tickets for the Netflix is a Joke Fest in LA and our European tour at watchwhatcrappens.com Watch this recap as a video and get our bonus episodes at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens  See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Well, hello everybody. This is Ronny. And this is Ben. Thank you for joining us. This is our two-parter for the Golden Crappy Awards that we did here in February in Los Angeles. So much fun. Thank you to everybody who came. Thanks to everybody who streamed the tickets online. Every year we release the audio right here where you're getting this podcast. It's chaos. This show is chaos, it's screaming and yelling and just a bunch of people parting for two and a half hours straight.

If it gets on your nerves, we get it. You don't come, you have to be there. That's the glory of it, my darling. But it's also a huge amount of fun. We had a great, great time and we hope you're able to have a great time also. Obviously there are elements of this broadcast that were really visual elements and so we apologize if it's a little disorienting as you listen, but we think that overall you'll

have a great time. And yeah, next time come join us live. Love you guys. Thanks for every, thanks to everybody for supporting us for all these years. We have been having the best time and we'll continue to love you guys. Enjoy. Welcome to the 2024 Golden Drabby Awards live from Los Angeles. Celebrating the best and the worst of Bravo! For as we like to call it, Mother Icon! Oh my god!

Tonight we have special guests from television, film, probably, only fans, most likely, and the largest media platform on the planet, the Internet. With music from our house band, The Crappers, Katie Kozoila and Walter Athanasis, plus your host, Ben Maddilkar and Ronnie Carroll! Hey Barbie! Hey empty patch! You wanna go for a ride? Yeah, sure, patch! Are those new boobs? Hell yeah they it, bitch! You wanna go for a ride? It's a bet! Are those new boobs?

Hell yeah they are, bitch! Come on Barbie, let's go party! I'm the proper girl, killing proper world I'm proper plastic And it's fantastic, mostly much for that Nothing till the end

Break what I got on, Cause I'm Popeye Con I'm a loyal friend But a lethal enemy I don't just do it for the culture honey I am the culture Hehehehehe The secret ingredient Darling it's me

Fashion is my love language And I speak it fluently Payback's a bitch so start barking, baby! If you wanna waste my time, at least hand me a talk-off! In a proper world, glamour surrounds me Promise always found me, only in a me Credit to my glam team, if you tuck my weave No, can we! Come on Barbie, let's go party! I'm ready to my glam team if you tuck my weave No padweeves!

Come on Barbie, let's go party! I love to laugh but make me mad and all day you're dead Ha ha ha ha ha! Blood may be thicker than water But it's harder to clean when it spills Blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank blank My life is like song Go, go, go, go, go, go In a town full of dirty lies Everyone could use a van I don't ride the fence, honey, I am the fence You ride me

I'm a proper girl Give a proper way I tried to plastic And it's fantastic Bless me, prize me a friends, love is still the end Bring what I've got up, killing all of my heart Watch what crappens I'm a crap-a-ca-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a- Hello! Hello! Hello, hello, hello!

Hello, so good to see you guys! Hi, everyone! Yes! Hello, Steve! Hi! Welcome to the 2024 Crappies! Golden Crappies! Still got it. Still got it. Still got it. I mean if we're talking about the lyrics that song, maybe I don't still got it, but you know what?

Girl, we're old now. Okay, we started this shit 12 years ago. Now I put the words on the fucking This and I'll still fuck it up. I don't even care. I'll fuck it up as I read it. It's like the Bible. This is the biggest crapies we've ever had. I don't know if you know this. Nearly, I should say over 40,000 people voted this year. It's huge. That was more than the presidential election. I don't know. Yeah. Turns out Trump won everything. You got to hand it to the guy. I'm so excited.

I'm like really thrilled about what we've got going on. Should we take a seat? Let's take a seat over here. Let's do it. Let's do it. I hope everyone enjoys this beautiful, beautiful tablecloth. And also these high class pure gold crap awards. You know, this tablecloth has been with us since 2017,

since we did a live show here in LA at the Terra Grand Ballroom. Some of you were there. This has been at every single one of our live shows, all across America and all across Canada. And by the way, we're taking it to London next. I'd like to thank you for this honor. Also my new album is coming out in one week. I'm a Swifty.

I'm a crappy. Can I just tell you, I really love you guys. Did you see how I just carried around a microphone? I hate holding set. I'm just putting this down. You're welcome. This is a very scary podcast tonight or a crappy thing because it's all being run via keynote thing here at the point. Well you're starting off great. Things could go wrong very quickly. But first you're doing great don't worry it's okay. Did you feel him start to spin out of control? I totally felt it. I felt his energy start to go to crazy town. It's okay. It's like fucking iPad stand oh my god oh my god

on Amazon in about five minutes fuck these people rotten hell Steve Jobs you deserved what you got by the way shout out to all the people who are watching this over streaming via moment hi look there's like real cameras here and everything it's very exciting well it would not be a crappies awards if we didn't have our favorite house band am I right? this year they're not only the crappers they are the most most extra crappers Katie and Walter

Katie and Walter, ladies. Katie and Walter, everyone. Welcome back. Here to celebrate a year of Scandival. Yeah, tell us. Katie and Walter were at a Scandival show before all that went down and happened to get a picture of the set list. Yeah, wait, tell us what happened, Katie. So I went to one of the shows at the Canyon Club and...

Yes, it was that show. It was that show. It's a very important place with James Merale. And Walter hated every minute of it, but I took a picture of the set list. So this year, we're dedicating it we're the most most extras and we're playing all those cheesy karaoke songs from the set list. It's huge. We also have something very special this is new

to our show this year for the first ever, we have a backstage camera. Does everyone want to see what's on our backstage camera? Okay, let's see. Let's see what we got. Oh. Wow. Wow. That's Sheena back there having a real tough time watching our show. That's our girl back there. You know, it is kind of offensive that she's a hundred yards away.

I know. She doesn't have to be a hundred yards away. Like what am I, a school or a church you know what that's not fair she know you should not be a hundred yards away get yourself out here she Because you're good as gold. Because you're good as gold. Sing it everybody! Because you're good as gold. Because you're good as gold. The one and only, Sheena!

Okay. The one and only, Sheena! Hi! This is a watch what crappens first, Sheena. It is! We are so excited you're here. Thank you for being here. I'm excited to be here. Thanks for having me. Oh my God. I don't know what to do with myself. We've been watching you for all these years. So what's going on? How did you enjoy a year of Scandival? Oh, you know, I lost some weight, but I made a lot of money. Good.

I had a girl. That's all you really need. I bought another house, so there's that. And you know what? The best part is Tom Sandoval isn't living in it right now. That's right. Schwartz did ask if he could have a room and I said hell no. Has anybody unfollowed Summer Moon lately? You know what? I haven't checked.

I probably should look at that. So we're really excited. The new season just started two weeks ago or so, two or three weeks ago. So is there anything that we can look forward to on this season? God, a lot of awkward conversations. Okay. A trip to Tahoe that I am dreading to watch back. Okay. Yes, I love that.

Yeah. Thank God. Yeah, I think it'll be a season where they do a lot of flashbacks too, which I love. Okay. Yes, I love that. Yeah. Thank God. Yeah, I think it'll be a season where they do a lot of flashbacks to which I love Okay, but um Can I have one of each at the prime cocktails? It's like you know what you lived but then you see it edited and you see their version of what you lived So I don't really know what to expect. Are you telling me that Jax can really swim because I So I don't really know what to expect. Are you telling me that Jax can really swim?

Because I just need to flash back every episode of Jax being stuck out in the water going, can someone help me? Can someone help me? Can someone help me? Please, help me. Can someone help me? You know, I think Rob was pissed that he didn't

beat the lifeguard out. It was less than, you know, it was like, he had the seven minutes and he didn't get out there in time. Do you know how many asshole husbands have tried hanging a TV in seven minutes and he didn't get out there in time. Do you know how many asshole husbands have tried hanging a TV in seven minutes and failed to do something? Mine is one of them. I seem to remember there was an issue with that.

Yeah, we're hiring someone to do the new house. So question, so we just saw you do a 2024 re-release of Good as Gold Screamo version. Yes. Sheena's version, Screamo version. Yes. I don't know where Kevin from the 27s is, but shout out to him. He's out here somewhere.

Kevin from the 27s is yours, guys. Yeah, he's out there. He's hot. He's hot. Maybe. Someone just held up a white claw. I don't know. Sounds about right.

I think it was a white claw. That's how you know that Sheena's sexy. Like a bunch of white claws go up in there. So how did you like doing a Scremo version of Good as Gold? It was so fun. So the way it started was when Katie, Ariana, and I DJed Emo Night in April, I'm like, how do we get this on camera? They can't clear any of the songs we're going to play. What if we get a band to do like a Scrimmo version? And then TJ, who owns Emo Night, thought of the 27s,

they put it together. It was better than I ever could have imagined. And since then, we got in the office, or the studio, which I'm in the new house. There's an office slash studio. But we did Apples and now we have a whole EP coming out, new songs and I'm so excited. It's been so much fun. Yes.

Watch out Taylor Swift. Let's have our first time. It is, it is actually going to be like the eras of Sheena, this whole EP. Oh, OK. You're going to get the, you got Boy Crazy recently. Boy Crazy. OK. The next one is called Sweet and Sour.

We're dropping that on March 1st. That's about just like mean girls and internet trolls you're gonna get a little bit of also one of my favorite sauces by the way sweet and sour yeah it is I had some today I have to say I loved watching I loved watching you sing that because I was not expecting that screamo moment even though you said this is screamo version it seemed like you were still doing like classic Good as Gold. You're just like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah reason why we have you out here is because we like to, every year when we do the crappy is we like to do like an opening toast. So we got like, we got some cups.

Oh, okay. Ronnie, Ronnie you're going to do the honors. Perfect. I'm not anymore. Finally. Yes, you're waiting on. We still constantly do corner. I did that the other day.

I went to Chili's for dinner the other night with Brittany and Lala. I went to the bathroom. I came back and just for shits and giggles, I yelled corner. Corner. Corner. I do it also. Okay, here we go. Ron is here.

Woo! That was huge. Okay, so Ronny, for those listening at home, Ronny is pouring Perseco into cups. Sheena has a class now. I've narrated every detail. We've also got these sweatshirts available still. Yeah, by the way, I took this out.

Shop.deermedia.com, just saying. Wait, it really is all happening iconic line okay so we are pouring these here we give one here to Walter and Katie I'm trying to I'm trying to paint a scene for the people at home who are listening wondering what's happening okay and here's Okay, so we have all our cups. And anyone who has a cup in the audience or nothing, whatever. Sheena, cheers.

Sheena, would you lead us in a toast please to start off the night? It could be anything. I mean, cheers to season 11. I would have never in my life thought that I would still be doing this and I'm so grateful. I wanna think of something Woody and Funny to say, but all I can think of is something I'm really thankful for.

So, cheers to Season 11. That is perfect. Cheers to Season 11 of Antipop Rules and to Sheena. Thank you. Cheers, everyone. Cheers, Sheena. You know, the first time I met you was actually at the Surly Goat. We were with friends and it was after Season 1 and you came in and you were, I think I was with Arianna or something.

And you were like, hi guys. And then you had really long hair and you were like playing with your hair and then you bent over and like... Did I whip it? You whipped it down, you're like, guess what guys? Whip. When you whipped it back, that happened to me. Season two. Where are you being serious? I'm serious. We're at season two guys.

All right. Sounds about right. I died. I was like, oh my God, it's Gina. Well, you know what? We've got some nominations to go. We've got some categories, some awards to go out. Do you want us to go out for the first category? Wait've got some nominations to go. We got some categories, some awards to go out.

Do you want us to go out for the first category? Wait, nominations? Nominations. Okay, hold on, I'll be right back. Oh. Got it chainted up for the nominoms. All right, Gina's gonna be right back, right after these moments,

but we're very excited for this. Oh yeah. for this. Ladies and gentlemen, good as gold, Sheena Shae. Okay, okay, alright. I'm gonna fire up this PowerPoint demonstration. Technically keynote. It's keynote. Now, we had to put Scandival in its own separate category because otherwise it would have won everything. There, wait, wait, wait, let's start it up, let's see. Okay.

Oh. Here we go. You guys, my night is done. I set up an AV presentation, that's all I need. All right, let's go to the first category. Most memorable Scandival moment. All right. You can read them on there too.

The first one is. Woo! Ariana's revenge dress. Hell yeah. Iconic. James gets rum in his eyes, screams, Ali! And trips and falls as he runs to the bathroom. Literally one of my favorite scenes in the entire run of the show.

Now I remember that. Sandoval says Raquel dipped out. When in fact they were banging while Ariana was at her grandmother's funeral. Boo! Boo! Yeah. This one might look. Boop, boop, boop. Yeah. This one might look... Ah.

Still true. Sheena explains she couldn't have hit Raquel because it's scientifically impossible for her to form a fist with her nails. Yeah. Scientifically. Solid defense to the judge. And the last one. Tom and Tom mess up their timelines at the reunion. I gotta say personally, I enjoyed watching this live.

All right, so which one do you think, which one do you want to win and which one do you think well do you want to win and which one do you think you guys told me I was winning that's why I'm here. No absolutely not just kidding but me obviously it's all it's all about me right everyone thinks I make it all about me so let's make it all about me. It's not all about you Sheena someone else could have won this award. I mean, look, Ariana's revenge dress, nothing's gonna beat that. I feel like I could never wear red again as long as I live.

However, I'm here. There's awards in front of me, and they're gold to match my outfit, so. Yes. It's me. Oh my God. Oh my God. outfit. So, it's me! Oh my God! Congratulations, Sheena! Thank you! Oh my God!

You won a Golden Crabby! You know what? This is better than the People's Choice Award. We might win tomorrow. Congratulations, Sheena. I'm on. Thank you. And by the way...

Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. oh my god. I also want to say that Sheena won this fair and square by a landslide. Sheena was voted the winner for this category. So congratulations Sheena. This is all you.

Thank you so much for coming out here tonight, Sheena. Whatever you do not see happen on Vanderpump Rules, you can catch- Give it up for Sheena Shay! Because she's good at the goal! You can catch on Sheena's podcast soon and again. Go download, download Boy Crazy right now. Here's Sheena, your envelope.

This is a very important award. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crap'n's commercial. Hey, it's Payne, and I'm here to tell you that we're back with a brand new season of Up and Vanished, called Up and Vanished in the Midnight Sun. In this newest season of Up and Vanished, called Up and Vanished in the Midnight Sun. In this newest season of Up and Vanished, I'm investigating an unsolved missing person's case in Noam, Alaska, on the edge of the Arctic Circle. Florence Ock-Pialloc, an Alaska native, was last seen on August 31, 2020, and I've spent the last year in Alaska trying to find out what happened to her, putting myself in the

most dangerous positions I've ever been in. You don't want to miss this brand new season of Up and Vanished. It is by far the most intense investigation I've ever been a part of. From Tenderfoot TV, Up and Vanished in the Midnight Sun is available right now. Listen for free on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. every week, fish dreams of creating his very own polite and quiet podcast. That is, until he gets a surprise visit to his Fishbowl podcast studio from the Cat in the Hat himself, and it becomes very clear that the cat has other plans for the podcast. And those plans are the opposite of quiet. Sing along to new favorite songs, try your luck at Titanic Tongue Twisters, have some fun with wondrous wordplay, and most importantly, bring your family at Titanic Tongue Twisters, have some fun with Wondrous Wordplay, and most

importantly, bring your family along for all of the adventures in the Cat in the Hat Cast. Follow the Cat in the Hat Cast on the Wondry app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to the Cat in the Hat Cast early and ad-free on Wondry Plus. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Wondery Kids Plus on Apple Podcasts today. Well, that was great. That was amazing. You never know how a noob is going to turn out up here. I could get ugly real quick.

Wait a minute, I forgot what you said about me. That one. That was a delight. OK. Gorgeous,, perfect sport. Thank you, Sheena. Wonderful, that was great. That's a great way to start the show, right? I do request some Brock next time. That is one drink of water. Tall drink?

Australian. That is one tumbler of water right there. What a handsome man. I saw him one time in real life and was like, hot damn, I'd do anything for that man. All right, well, let's move on to the next category. No, let's stay on Brock. Okay, so the next category is best newbie.

And here, guys, guys, here to help us present this award is the host of Entertainment Tonight, Nichelle Turner. Oh. Oh. Guess what? That's a lie. Oh, no. Here she is. Oh Guess what that's a lie. Oh, no, here she is here. She is Here come around here, she's got you Don't worry we can dance Sue is ourani for the night. She's like, You guys, this can be very exciting. It's a great category.

Big, exciting, tough category. She shows me how to make her way up. You saw her come down the aisle. Okay, give way up. You saw her come down the aisle. Okay, give it up! Alright, I'll be doing it again. Let's do it again. Let's do it again. The host of Entertainment Tonight! Welcome, welcome. Come take a seat. Go in the center there.

Oh, I can just be in the center. Yes, ma'am. You get the center. Alright. Hi, welcome to Come take a seat. Go in the center there. Oh, I can just be in the center. Yes, ma'am. You get the center. All right. Hi, welcome to our show. Hi. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you guys for having me. Hi, everybody.

Yes. How are you doing today? Well, I'm really good. Let me tell you, the people in the audience are having a good time. Good. There are two ladies behind me having a good time. We break the sales of alcohol record, the records for alcohol sales every theater we go to. Many of you all may know Nichelle most recently from a very important and impactful red carpet interview you did

with. 25 years in this business and it all comes down to this moment. With Jennifer Lawrence. Did you guys see that? We're in J-Law, fanned out about the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, Nichelle. Yeah. Yeah, and she brought it up to me. I didn't bring it up to her.

She said, we need to talk about the housewives. We need to talk about that finale. You can check in with you. Hey, we did. But you were making some deep cuts. Like when I saw that, I was like, oh, they're both like Bravo fans. It is true.

My name is Nichelle, and I'm a Bravo holic. Absolutely. It's funny, the fan base is so rabid, huh? I was watching that Housewife and the Hustler thing on Hulu, and the LA Times writers who wrote all these massive pieces. You remember the ones that the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills couldn't read because they were too long? It's hard.

And they were mad because Sutton actually read. She took all that time and she actually read. Sutton's now the villain because she read. So anyway, they were like, you know, the lady's like, I've worked my whole life and got a Pulitzer and my kids never said shit to me. And I did this thing on Erica fucking Girardi and now they think I'm worse shit now.

There you go, there you go. But less trash mouth. I don't know why I'm worse shit. There you go. There you go. But less trash mouth. I don't know why I'm talking like that. All right, well, let's get on with the nominees for best newbie on Bravo, shall we? You can either read off here or off there, whatever it is you're feeling. Okay, let's see.

Whatever feels good for you. Whatever is your best angle? Yeah, what is your best angle? Let's see, if I'm kind of like this, I've got the swoop and they will do it this way, so I'll read this one. This is gonna be the one. This is the next slide. This is the current slide. We got it. So the nominations for best newbie are...

Angie Katzemanis. Wait. Angie Katzemanis. Angie, I'm in the Greek Mafia Katzemanis. Yes, absolutely. I am Greek. I am Greek. I am Greek. I am Greek. She, by the way, she had one of the most underappreciated fights of all time, which was a fight about the Humpty Dance. That is true. And from the Real Housewives of New York City, Jenna Lyons. Yes. And also from the Real Housewives of New York City, Gessel Tess.

And from the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, Monica Garcia. Well, I think we know. Monica's got some. Yeah, Monica think we know. We've got some, yeah, a lot of stuff. We gotta give this last one up, though, to our girl from Mary to Medicine and the Traders Queen. The Traders. This page reparks. Absolutely.

Is she a newbie? Not totally, but sort of. Enough of a newbie that we could wedge her in there. Absolutely. Wait, are you obsessed with the traders also? Am I obsessed with the traders? Yeah, so good, yeah. Oh, I literally can't wait till Thursday.

I can't wait till Phaedra and Kate Chastain team up. It's over. It's over. I literally, I literally can't. Phaedra, we're gonna get together and we're gonna commit murder. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Together. Pedro, we're gonna get together and we're gonna commit murder. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Together. Yes, child. We're gonna be a murdery duo. Mm-hmm. Damn, Pedro. So who do you guys think is gonna win this one? Oh, come on. If I was a voter, I belonged to the Church of Jessel. So it would be Jessel tank for me all day.

But we know, we know who's taking this one home, don't we? You think it's gonna be Monica? She shook the table, come on, it's Monica Garcia, right? You think it's Monica? Absolutely, we think it's Monica Garcia. The people voted, the people voted. Would you do the honors for us? I would love to.

Please open. This is fun. And the crappy for us? I would love to. Please open. This is fun. And the crappy for best newbie goes to... Brrrr. Brrrr. Brrrr. ...Jessell Tank for Real Estate in New York City! And from Mexico, please welcome, Jessell Tank. Oh my goodness, is this up and coming? Bravo, Liberty, no longer up and coming. Guys, thank you so much for awarding me with Newbie of the Year.

I am so honored. I know how tough of a critic you both are, and I know how tough your audience is, and you've been so supportive throughout this entire first season and I am just speechless which rarely ever happens so thank you again for your support I so wish I could be there to accept it in person but as you can see I'm in the middle of the jungle in Mexico um hiding just kidding um but I cannot wait cannot wait to just see where this takes us. So thank you so much again, Newbie of the Year. Woo!

I love it. 13. Is that the trip they got to take off Poppins' points? Hey, y'all, I just wanted to add, thank you for voting for Kessels Newbie. So we all know that without the Street Food Society of New York City. I don't know where she would be right now. So thank you and justice for my bond meet. Congratulations to Justin. I love that. Getting a little Povet thrown in there.

That's amazing. Little Povet action. Why do I want to make out with everybody's husband today? Will you accept this award on their behalf? I will. I will accept this award on their behalf. I will. I will accept this award on behalf.

And I'm keeping this bad boy. I'm sorry, Gessel. Yeah, this is amazing. Michelle, thank you so much. Thank you so much for coming. Thank you so much. Thank you, everybody. Thank you so much.

Thank you, everybody. You're talking to me, baby. I'm going now and now. Crazy, crazy, come on. Let us all bounce and go crazy. Let us all bounce and go crazy. Let us all bounce and go crazy. Let us all bounce and go crazy.

Let us all bounce and go crazy. Let us all bounce and go crazy. Let us all bounce and go crazy. Let us all bounce and go crazy. Let'm going now and now crazy, crazy, come on. Let us all bounce and go crazy. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, I keep on going with the gate by the ocean. Extra. Extra, extra. All righty. Extra, extra. Alrighty. Oh my gosh.

I've got a graveyard of water down here. I just keep knocking water bottles over. Alright everybody, so fun so far. Let's just keep it going. Next up we have Most Cringe. Most Cringe. Rapids Classic. Good.

That's a wrap. I just wanted to have a cringe moment while we present Most Cringe. Please welcome. We love her so much. She's a good friend of ours. Please welcome Christina Aria. Kristi Maria. Just a city boy Born and raised in South Detroit

It took the midnight train going anywhere Strangers wait Yeah Strangest, way to chill, up and down the board in a varnished shadow. Copyright, listen. Yeah, that'd be cringe if we got a copyright talking about cringey moments. You know what, I just watched The Greatest Night in Pop last night and I think this trumps it right now. I think this trumps it, yeah.

Oh wait, you gotta go, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah. Oh wait, you gotta go. Oh wow, wow, wow, wow! You gotta hit a little. We are the world! Michael Jackson, Saida. We are the children. I got psoriasis. Let me tell you how it's going. Look, Cindy.

Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow! We are the psoriasis. We are. Cindy, give it a rest. Excuse me. Me and my colloidal oatmeal lotion would like to have a word with you. All right, well, welcome.

My cringe. This is a fun category. This is the cringiest, most cringiest stuff here that happened on Bravo. We shouldn't mention we didn't say this but there was actually a full like big first round of voting which hopefully you guys all participated in where we had a long list in each category and all of these categories these are the top five these nominees are the top five in each

category just thought of case you want another methodology you're welcome. Okay, you ready to do some most cringe nominees? I am. Let's do her. Most cringe. Danielle on Winter House. It's cringey. No. Listen, I feel like that's just cold to even put her up here.

We felt guilty when we even nominated her ass. I know. Because she was so cringe that we felt bad even calling it cringe. But girl. Ronnie, we've been up here for like 10 seconds. And I don't want anything serious. But why are you not talking to me anymore? It's been 10 seconds. Christina, why aren't we partying? Why aren't we partying right now? Why aren't we partying? And I don't want anything serious. But why are you not talking to me anymore?

It's been 10 seconds. Hey, Christina, why aren't we partying? Why aren't we partying right now? Why aren't we partying? We should be partying. We should be partying right now. And she didn't even tell me about her engagement. Sorry, I just want to throw some summer house cringe in there too.

I love you, Danielle. I do. Okay, this one's a real big cringy one. Oh. Gary demands to know if Madison is on her period. Boo! Boo! Yuck!

If that cringer is that just you ain't got no home training. I just want to say if you don't watch Below Deck Sailing, you get it, you get it, you get it. Maybe you're more of an adventure. Adventure! Oh, Kyle tattoos a K on Morgan Wade's body. Yeah! The K could stand for anything guys. Goodbye Kyle.

I don't say goodbye Kyle, I heard you. Oh wait, hold on, I have to do you proud. Larsa, like, outskirties, like, cancer diagnosis, like. Yeah, that's very good. It's cancer-like. Like, how could you, like, have cancer-like? Why don't you, like, tell me that, like, at lunch? I don't want to leave this category.

I have, like, separation anxiety, like. That's like hard. I'm going to miss you. Oh my God, it's been like so much. I'm going to miss you so much. I just don't want to miss you so much. I love you. I'm gonna miss you. Oh my god, it's been like so long. I'm gonna miss you so much. It's just as good as I missed you so much. I love you. I love you.

Call me. And finally. Oh my god. I wear your father's pajamas at night to make those girls feel comfortable. That goes to Louie, wearing nano's pajamas to comfort Trey's daughters. It's a very comforting thing for them. I just wanted to wear them, make them feel comfortable. Did you know that?

Did you know that I wear those pajamas? It's the fact that he's an eggplant, the reason I got a boner right now. All right. Nono's pajamas. Yes, sir. Aubur Jean. Christina, what do you think?

What's most cringe to you? What do you think is going to win? What would you vote for? So what? Who can'ts? I voted for Louis and Nono's pajamas. That's my pick. Yeah, I think that's the most cringe.

That's my favorite. Yeah, that's my pick. All right. Oh, do I get to open an envelope? Of course you do. We put them conveniently far away from all of us. Thank you, long nails, for not doing what you're supposed to do. Oh, Jumroll.

Jumroll. Oh. And the winner is Danielle on Winter House. They like it. From Winter House. Well, congratulations to Danielle. Earned it. Earned it. Would you please present this award to Danielle? it. Earned it.

Would you please present this award to Danielle? Just don't get too close. Leave it at the door. Danielle couldn't be here to accept this award tonight. So I'll be accepting it on her behalf. Christina area, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you, Christina. She did all of our backstage stuff on Instant United. Fantastic. Thank you so much. She did all of our backstage stuff on Instant United. She's fantastic.

Megan's so lovely. I know. Don't stop. All right. All right. In a ceremony held earlier this evening. I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say,

I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say,

I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say in a ceremony held earlier this evening. You know, it's a lot of awards. Some of them just can't get to the telecast. So here's some awards that were, that were, I'll start this. Yeah, we have a separate artist dinner. All the artists gather. Happens a weekend starts. Yeah, we have a separate artist dinner all the artists gather happens a weekend before Yeah, okay, so outstanding achievement in Bob way

Zim Zimbabwe For Joelle summer special recognition of strength in the face of adversity Lisa hoxton For driving her maids Honda. Best example of why Joseph Smith doesn't allow caffeine, soda drunk Bobby on Real House wants to salt lake city. You can't tell me what to do.

I'm 13 years old now, mama. I got a golf cart. Best funeral for a non-dead cast member, otherwise known as an alive person. Quad's funeral, married to medicine. The most terrible patterns worn by one human being in the past 20 years, my dear friend, Gail Simmons. The Greta Thunberg Eco Award for generating solar power through her sunglasses, Angie Katzenavis. Real haas lives of Salt Lake City. And to accept the Greta Thunberg Ecogo Award for generating solar power through her sunglasses,

please welcome Angie Ke... Yeah! Holy shit! I am reeking out about this award. I wanted to say thank you to Watswell Crappens. I remember the first time you posted something about my sunglasses, I finally realized how iconic they really were So I love your show you guys bring light to the darkness

You have a great sense of humor and even though you make fun of me for some reason I still keep listening So just wanted to say thank you. Have a great night and me and my shades will be Bach Lava. Thank you. Thank you, Angie. Commissions, here comes one right now. So, by the way, I love that she made a baklava pun. So you know, every, you know, we have, this is a very important award show, and we felt it was important to highlight all our nominees in the Best Bravo Show category. So this year what we're gonna do is we are going to provide an overview

of some of these seasons. Presenting a clip package from the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. really helps. I can't believe I'm gonna go to Magic Mike in Las Vegas and not drink. I brought a stack of ones for everybody girls go crazy. I hear they bring you on if you wear a skirt and I wore a scarf. Just sighing, just sighing. Oh, look at that, Sotan. They've brought the entire audience on except for you, Sotan.

Sotan! Erica's hot in pollution at this point. The woman's making love to the ozone layer. Look at her down there. Oh yeah. I cannot pollution at this point, the woman's making love to the ozone layer. Look at her down there. Oh yeah. Look at you. I can't, I cannot look at this. I am a board member of the American Ballet Foundation of Ballet.

I have never been to a more disgust and depraved and desultory attempt at entertainment. In my life, I am leaving. I can't believe I'm having a dinner party and not drinking. Can someone pass me a taco? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha asking about my marriage impossible to fare with global country superstar Morgan Wayne. Cut to. Oh my god, Morgan close your eyes. I'm gonna tattoo you. What's it gonna be, Kyle? Guess, guess. A boy at shrimp. No, guess again. Fried shrimp. No, keep guessing. Hope shrimp. No, guess again. Peanut butter and jelly shrimp. One more guess.

Flour shrimp. Okay, bonus guess. Shrimp shrimp. You're gonna get it this time. One more guess. Puppy shrimp. No, it's a K. I'm tattooing a K on you.

Oh my god. I can't believe I'm at Taco Tuesday. I'm not drinking. Erica, I can't believe I'm at Taco Tuesday and not drinking! Erica, I want an apology for saying that my daughter is three cents five years ago. Oh yeah, Denise, who makes more money on OnlyFans? You eat daughter! How dare you mention my daughter's OnlyF with that paying $9.99 verse? Denise, you jack-it! It's upside down, Denise!

Don't do this. Don't do this. Don't. Don't. Don't do this. Hey! Something's upside down! Hi! Um, as a solid 8.5, I have something to say.

Guys, guys, no, stop. I just learned, guys, I just learned, Sutton doesn't even have an esophagus. Like, why lie about it? Thank you, you're welcome. Thank you. That was Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Huh? Oh yeah, I'm good. Thank you, honey. Oh my gosh, we get some deep shit on this channel.

Wow, that was really intense. Going through that footage for that was, it was a long time. It was a lot of tears. It was a lot of feels. Alright, what do we have next, Ben? Best scandal. Oh my God, this was the year of the Bravo scandal, okay? One of the big category. This was a big one. There was stealing. Well, no, there wasn't stealing I guess that was last year and a year before It's a lot of stealing. Well housewife and the hustler is out, which oh by the way, Sessie Alvarez from the Bravo docket You know one of my favorites is here. We match. We match. Love you. Congratulations on housewife and the hustler Killed it, but that's out if you want to let go revisit stealing. I just like to remind you Erica's not innocent Thank you so much for coming Just like I told you years ago Erica fucking knew everything

Thank you the crappy award for Ronnie being correct all the fucking time and never getting credit goes to me. Ronnie was correct all the fucking time. Okay, so the point is, thank you guys, God that felt good. You know that's my favorite thing to say. I was right. Of course. So, best scandal. So there was no one stealing this year, but there was cheating. That was a big one. It's like y'all never fucked your fucking friends' husband before That's a hypocrite Like you never had a burner account to tell me to fuck off. I know some of you do Everyone who tells me to fuck off has zero zero followers and a great face

It was Tanisha. Okay, please welcome back to the crappy stage. We love her so much you may know her from the TV show Hacks. I do Would walk five thousand miles and I would walk five hundred more just to be the man Who walks five thousand miles to end up at your door Ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba-ba Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na My Lebanese sister. My cousin, Rani. Welcome back, Bruce. Actually, I have a Lebanese sister. That was cold. Oh, it was wonderful to be asked back.

How fun is it to see their impressions coming out of their cute faces? I love you too. You get me through all of my household chores. And Josefina loves you too. Oh, Josefina? Oh, we talk about Bravo all the time in Deborah Vance's mansion. Yes. Rose, you were doing so much right now

because you are wearing a turban and I really appreciate that you brought a turban tonight. You know, I thought I would psychically predict who's going to win this category. I was so excited to get Best Scandal because to me, a scandal is truly when you're watching at home, do you spill your snack because you've gasped, right? You spill your wine and your skinny pop,

and you're just like, no. Okay? So some of them, I want to go through why the ones that I don't think deserve best scandal, but let's just get right to it. Let's get right to it. I'm taking over. This is your say, this is your turn. This is your say. This is your turn.

This is your moment. This is Rosa's turn. You do your thing. It's Rosa's turn. Okay. It's our first. Mama's talking wrong. All right, the first nominee for biggest scandal. This is a scandal. Oh, I think it's a scandal. Okay. Okay, not. Okay, girls' trip season on pause

after Caroline Manzo accuses Brandy Glanville of unwanted kisses. Okay. Ooh. That's a scandal, given that we've known Brandy, we love Brandy, but given her past behavior, not that surprising. Sorry. Not surprising. It's not a scandal. Well, it's not really a scandal, it's assault. I think it would be assault. I think that one needs like its

category of like, is it assault or is it a pepper? And then you have to be like, it's assault. That is definitely assault. And poor Caroline. I mean, Caroline's been a favorite since the Ham Game, right? The Ham Game? The Ham Game. With Alby. Oh my god. That's a deep cut.

I've never been able to look at Oscar Mayer the same way after that. No, that's a deep cut, the Ham Game. The Ham Game. All right, let's go on to the next one here. So this is. This is Kyle and Mauricio Split of Bits Morgan Wade Rumors. This for me cannot be the one because we know from watching Alice in Years ago he will

never fulfill you. Know that. Yes. Okay. Yeah. So we kind of got a foreshadowing of like that could happen one day. Not that we wanted it to, but it was, were you like, no. Yeah, we do. No. Now she told us. I think the most shocking thing is like the being in the country star half your age, you know, not that Mauricio cheated.

I don't think anyone surprised that Mauricio cheated. But then again, it's LA, so no one's shocked. It's like, oh, so she's being in a girl half her age. It's like what we shocked. It's like oh, so she's banging a girl half-race. It's like what we do It's So into her music instead at that event. Yeah, she was super into her Oh, yeah I mean when you have a an event for your friend's death and you're having your girlfriend sing a song about fucking on the kitchen floor Me she's into her. Can we go back to cringe that goes in in the cringe category. That's right. That's actually retroactive cringe.

OK. Next. Y'all do you. OK. OK. OK. OK. There we go.

Yes. And this picture, this picture itself. Amazing. The fact that none of that hair got stuck to that lip gloss was amazing to me, right? With the wind blowing on the beach That's almost more of a triumph than a scandal. It really is. Plus Monica, we knew that Monica, first of all She pets her hair like it's an independent pet from her body. Yes. She does the full lift. She lifts it

She touches it like it's her pet on her shoulder. I love her. But when we knew she worked for Jen, you know what I mean? Was it that surprising? Anyone in the Jen Shaw orbit? Do you know what I mean? Yeah, they're gonna steal from your ass, you know? They're gonna steal. Anyone in the Jen Shaw orbit,

you know it was gonna leave the Ross and you're gonna hear this. Right. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Or the Jen Shaw prison pageant, which apparently happened yesterday. Pageant, she had a Barbie ponytail. Did you see that? Yes. Or the or the gents Shaw prison pageant which apparently happened yesterday Yes, you know what else is so great about this this picture I mean it really does show all of their fashions in such a perfect

It's like such a perfect display of who these people are. I mean look at them Meredith cover covering the arms Lisa looks like a gypsy pinata. I don't know what she's doing. Lisa, Lisa looks like they dressed her from that store in Palm Springs. Where she got to wear that, remember that? That jingle bell. I don't do cocktails.

And really we knew, I mean say it with me everybody, how much did we love Heather saying receipts? Proof. Proof. Timeline. Screenshots. Fuck it. Everything. Everything. We love Heather saying, receipts, proof, timeline, screenshot, fucking everything. I can't be that one. We have another nominee. Yes.

Scandival. Scandival. To me, this is the one. It's the one. To me, this is the one. Because everyone remembers where you were. Yes. Right?

Yeah. I do. I do remember where I was. I was in a roundabout. Right? You were in a roundabout. You were in a roundabout? Christina Arielle texted me.

I was in a roundabout. I almost crashed the car into a thing. Because I was saying, uh-uh, that's bull shit. I don't believe it. I was on myself looking through a snack and cakes cookbook. I was saying, uh-uh, that's bull shit, I don't believe it. I was on myself looking through a snack and cakes cookbook. It's like because it was not only to Ariana, it was James, they were friends. He cannot compare his relationship with Kristen years ago using the condoms in that shitty apartment. Come on. They weren't friends then. They were friends.

He paid for Rochella. So he did it to the girlfriend and to the guy friend. Double scandal. Well, also, James used Tom's condoms. I think that if you are banging somebody else's girlfriend and you put on a condom, that's a sign of respect. Is it just me? It's your mom's.

Like you're welcome. It's a scary trip. Yes. But there is still another nominee. Somehow there is still another nominee somehow there is still a nominee. Yeah. Now I can't with this one. Shannon gets a DUI. I love Shannon. Aw come on Shannon. It can't be that one because we can't give an honorary trophy to anything involving Archie. Archie was in the car. Archie, yeah. For Archie.

Plus, you know, you go to the Quiet Woman a couple of times, a couple of tequila, not that surprising. It was a matter of time. Am I right? Yeah, that's absolutely correct. But she actually gets a lot of that from Archie, because Archie is the biggest addict on Broadway television. Oh, I didn't know.

Addicted to balls. Addicted to balls. You cannot. Rani, Archie, we all. Archie, we all. For me, one of the big questions was, Scandival obviously took over. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did.

I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did.

I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. I did.

I did. I did. I did. I did. I did. Will you do the honors? Will you open the envelope? Oh God, I should have been offering to hold people's mics this whole time. It's exhausting now, honestly. And I predicted correctly, Scandal Rose! Scandal Rose, thank you so much for being here. Thank you very much. Go check her out on Hacks as Josephina. Go check her out on Hacks as Josephina! at your door. Ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, suss. Ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba,

ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba, ba-da-ba. Whoo! All right. All right. Well, you know, Bravo gives us so many scandals, but it also gives us so many wonderful quotes that we remember all year round. So let's celebrate them.

Shall we? Let's do it. Best quote nominations are. Ronny, would you do this one? Start it off. I'll turn it. Receipts, proof, timeline, screenshot! The rumors and the nastiness

You wanna talk about us? We don't know how to say it. I can't control her. You wanna talk about us with us? I can't control her. You can't live. Naiman. Naiman. Naiman. Naiman. Let me talk. Naiman. Naiman. Naiman.

Naiman. Let me talk. Naiman. Naiman. Naiman. Naiman. Naiman. Naiman.

Naiman. Naiman. Naiman. You're a worm with a mustache. Do you need anything? Like a dumpling latte or something? Need anything? For you to die.

Famicom? Which one? Which one do you think is gonna be Ronnie? I think it's gonna be Receipts Proof Timeline Screenshots because they did that in like Congress or something and everyone seems to be. Yeah. Name them as great.

My vote personally was for Receipts Proof Timeline screenshots, because I just love it. Like, I can't hear people list things anymore. Did you hear like, I was watching, we're watching some show and someone was like putting in an order. They're like, I'll have potatoes, peas, carrots. I was like, screenshots! That's one of those that's become so popular, your mom will say it, you're like, oh my God,

it's over now. You know? It's on fleek. Yeah. Exactly. That's one of those that's become so popular your mom will say it. You're like, oh my god, it's over now, you know It's on fleek. Yeah Exactly Kyle Richards through Richard's learning on fleek Here, why don't you do it see proof Tom on Jesus everything my mom stopped putting Jesus Fucks sake give the man a rest Been two thousand years can he take a nap? This is sound.

Meredith Marks. Oh my goodness, do you you wanna talk about the, do you wanna talk about the best? I would like to thank my toddler baby, Bruxy, for lending his tiny little toddler hands every time it was time to cuddle Lemon, along with his sister Chloe and his father Sethie. A little adorable thing.

All right. Oh, white bean salad. Let's see. Oh, oh, oh, Ronnie, we have more things that happened in the ceremony. You want to start this one off? Oh, in a ceremony held earlier this evening. Kitty Walter, everyone. I told you, it's all written down in front of me and I'm still confused.

Kitty and Walter ladies and gentlemen you gorgeous piece. In a ceremony held earlier this evening. Ex-Lynsson being thin without Osempic. Heather Dubro's IMDB credits on Real Housewives of Forrest County. They're from the 1900s, bitch! Okay. Excellence in tagline insanity, and the winner is Karen Huger, her sister insisting she's a fence! And we ride her! Best performance by foliage, the plant Monica's mother taught to in a restaurant.

Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. That was a talented plant. Yeah. International trip that caused America the most shame. The Real Housewives of New Jersey in Ireland. That was mortifying. And it was a year of a lot of shame. So congratulations to them.

Excellence in purple facial effects. Louis Louis real housewives of New Jersey. They're really sweeping in the pre-awards. Yeah, they are This is interesting best penmanship best penmanship and the winner was Marisol's liver Marisol's liver. Aww! Yeah. It can write, it writes well. I am tired. I am dying. I have been tortured.

I am left alone to die. Marisol's liver. Outstanding achievement in being one of the only cast members not to make out with Austin Crowell here to accept her award in person Golden Crappy Awards, arguably the most glamorous event of the season. However, I'm positively thrilled to be receiving this award and of all the awards that I have received in the past, none are as prestigious or as distinguished as this one. This award is it is for and I quote, outstanding achievement and being one of the only

cast members not to make out with Austin Crowell. It should be noted, however, that all the guys on Southern Charm are way too old for me anyway, so it's a good point. In closing, I want to thank Bonnie and Ben, the Academy, and my agent, Peaches. Thank you. Thank you, Miss Patricia. Well done. All right. Now to present the award for Best Newbie. Someone we really love in real life.

I mean, she came on the screen, captivated everybody. Best supporting character. What would I say? Newbie. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Best supporting character, again, written down. You see, don't write stuff down for me. It's the cor, it's, watch for crappins, guys. Let's welcome the gorgeous, talented, luminous Miss Nia Reneo. Nia! Nia! Nia!

Nia! I wish I had the head of Schwartz's mom. I wish that I had Schwartz's mom. Nia! Nia! Nia! What can I find a mother like that? I wish that I had Schwartz's mom. What can I find a mother like that? Schwartz's mom. I wish that I had Schwartz's mom.

Hi, Nia. Beautiful. Hello, everybody. Thank you for being here. Thank you for having me. It's just so exciting. I'm so glad you're here. You're a friend of ours. We love seeing you.

But also, you all may remember Nia, because Nia was at Taco Tuesday at Real House on Beverly Hills. Taco Tuesday. And asked some provocative questions. Wait, they're actual little poops? I can't see from over there. I don't have my glasses.

Wait a minute. Oh, this is great. Isn't that amazing? This is very appropriate. I love it. Wait a minute. Oh, this is great. Isn't that amazing? This is very appropriate. I love it. So, Taco Tuesday. How was that? Talking about shitshow.

Yes. Ah. No, it was actually really, it was fun. It's weird because you're in there as a guest. You're not a cast member. So, it's sort of unclear of how much you should participate because you understand that it's about the ladies Right, and if you come in to sort of aggressive and too thirsty like that's never a good look So you kind of have to know when to sort of fall back and let it let it happen

I think you were a pitch perfect and I feel like a lot of people online were like why is Nia not on the real house? Thank you guys yeah, because you came right in, started shit, and then... You know what? You set the whole night off and then you relaxed. I really... that's true. And that's like such a great place to be. Come in, be a little messy, and then leave. Yes.

Oh my God. It's like the... I couldn't... I couldn't... Crystal and I are friends in real life. We've met maybe two, three years before she got the show, so it was a very like organic friendship. Then we have to ask, yes, are you one of the 14 or you know what? Who are those people? Were any of those ladies at that party? I know yes. Oh well that's good. So she's brought some back into the fold. Yeah, there were, yes. I'm not a part of that 14 in particular,

but I know some of those ladies. There was, it definitely was a thing. It was a thing that happened, and there were some that chose to say, well. I'm not a hearty girl. I love it. That's a whole other thing, yeah. So was there like wild stuff that was happening at Taco Tuesday that we didn't see?

Or was there like a greater context that we should know about what went down that night? You know, it was really interesting because there was a lot of shit that went down that night. They were yelling at each other, they were going back and forth. They were talking about so many different things. And I honestly, I didn't remember until I watched the show back that I did ask Sutton about Vegas. Because remember they came in the kitchen and they were like, well, why don't you ask her? And I was like, I'm not touching that.

But then when we sat down, now that I think back, they were kind of taking a while to get, they were kind of dancing around it. And Denise, Denise was dancing around everything, literally. Denise is a beautiful woman, but she was like, who is upset? What happened in Vegas?

Like it was just sort of like going on, I was like, all right, like what happened? So tell us about, yeah, I really felt like I needed to move it along. Let's move it along, so. And then anyway, we. Not you, I was saying that. No, no, I really felt like I needed to move it along. Let's move it along, so. And then anyway, we. Not you, I was saying that. No, no, I know what you mean.

And then we, the friends of crystals who were invited, we left. We went into a separate room so that the cameras could focus on the ladies and their issues and stuff. So everything that happened between Denise and Erica, we didn't see or hear. They weren't screaming at each other. The things that she said she was like just tell me Who makes more money yours? We didn't hear any of that right we were just back there chatting amongst ourselves taking selfies together

Then as the night was wrapping up Erica comes into the kitchen. We're chatting chatting chatting the whole thing is breaking up Denise comes into the kitchen and they hug each other They say some things to each other. I didn't hear it and they hug each other. They say some things to each other, I didn't hear it. They hug each other, okay honey, bye bye. So imagine my surprise when I see the show and Erica said what she said about her daughter and those bitches were hugging each other. So I, and I think Kyle when she came in,

I was like, oh yeah, they were just hugging and she was like, what? So it was, yes, it was very confusing. Yeah, it was very confusing, but anyway, it was super fun. You were great on it. I loved the way that you asked those questions. Thank you. It was really fun.

We thought you'd be the perfect person for this category, since you did serve a supporting role on that episode. Why not present the nom's first supporting character? I'm honored. I'm truly honored. So you can read them either off here or off there, which I don't know if you guys do. It's really small down here. Uh-huh. So best supporting Kiki Barth.

Don't we love Kiki? From Real Housewives of Miami. I'm sorry. Love her. I'm just gonna say it right now. Kiki is that bitch. Okay? Can we give her a mojito so she can be full time? Honestly.

I'm giving that a standing ovation, guys. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Kiki Barth, I love Kiki. She's gorgeous. We love her. Up next is Norma from Below Deck. Yeah, Norma from Below Deck. Yeah, Norma. I don't know who that is.

That's okay. But congratulations, girl. She's the star of Bravo, so. Okay. Meet Norma. Sorry, thank you, Norma. Norma, she will change your life now that you know who she is. If you ever need like an incompetent stew or a deck hand, call Norma.

Norma's her girl. Next up, Pobbit, real housewives of New York City. We love Povet. Oh, Povet, we love Povet. Povet is very unbothered, and Povet's but me. First time in our show's history that someone's been nominated against their sandwich. Against their sandwich.

Wow, so controversial. Excellent. And next up, Pepsi. From Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Tripped, Thailand, let me tell you something. Pepsi deserves more, no shade. Pepsi deserves more than a golden crappy for what those women put him through. He does.

He needs therapy and a vacation. When he cried because they were so extra in mind like he's that poor man. But anyway Pepsi. Okay well. Yeah but is somebody who's like trained a lot of waiters get back to your table sir. What are you crying? There's no crying in service. There's no crying in service. Back. They broke him. They broke Pepsi. They broke Pepsi. They broke Pepsi. Truly the Pepsi challenge. Yes.

Okay. Poor Pepsi, the challenge. Okay. So now the winner. Yeah, I was gonna say, I got the gloves. By the way, loving this outfit. These gloves are amazing. Amazing.

I wanted to impress you guys. I wanted to say very much. I'm impressed. Oh, yes Kiki Barth We love Accept this award on behalf of Kiki Barth. Thank you. Nia Rene. We love you. Thank you guys. Congratulations to Kiki Barth. Thank you, Nia Renee Hill. We love you, Kiki. Thank you for being here. Thank you, guys. And congratulations to Kiki Barth. Thank you, Amir.

Thank you. Nia, everyone. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I wish that I had Schwartz's mom.

Schwartz's mom. Schwartz's mom. Schwartz's bomb. Oh, cool. Okay. Okay, so now it is time for another scene from a nominee for best show. This one is really cool, because this is one of my favorite Instagram accounts. I think this chick is so talented. She takes the Barbie making, the Barbie video making thing to a whole different level with her art direction.

I mean, she is a badass. We asked her if she would collaborate with us, and what she turned in is amazing. I'm proud to introduce a new short film by Instagram's Aetheropole. Guys, there's something I need to tell you guys. It's not good. Oh my god, what is it? You're gonna cry. You're gonna cry. Guys, we've come a long way as four.

We have. And Monica is not who she says she is. Who is she? She is not our friend. She is someone who is she? She is not our friend. She is someone who has schemed and worked to infiltrate our friend group. What is happening? Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.

And the name, you all know her at. Phil Collins. The woman whose birthday we have celebrated. Boris Becker. The woman we were. I know what she is, Sheryl Teig. The woman we were... I know it, she is Cheryl Teigs. The woman we were in the store with today! Taylor Swift!

I love that. Michelle Obama! Rosie O'Donnell exploited my vagina. Guys, it's a woman that's not here right now. She's gonna meet us at the table in just a minute. Eleanor Roosevelt! Joni Mitchell. Alf, it's reality. Fonteese! Who? Uh-huh. I'm on Roosevelt. Johnny Mitchell. Alf, it's reality.

Fondise. Ew. Uh-huh. I am great. Get out of here. You're not in the scene, Angie. Guys, you're supposed to be horrified by this. This is the biggest moment of the season.

Oh! There be a wall. Oh my god. You exploited my vagina. My toddler. I was just going gonna ask that Jack in Columbia. Guys, what are you guys talking about? I just bought a bag of Louis Vuitton just to fit in! You are reality!

Vontice! And you are like old, even stupid! Wait, she's sending long up, right? This is how you know I'm telling the truth. I have your perfect formula. Receipts, proof, timeline, screenshots, fucking everything to prove that you are a fucking bully and an internet troll. And I have a dish of Musaka that also adds to the case.

I have a vagina. I don't care what the hell it says with me. You have excited my vagina! I lost my ring guys Eat the rope all ladies and gentlemen Fucking ridiculous She made a Rosie O'Donnell doll, dude. We said Alf and she made an Alf, okay? That is incredible. Okay. Well, the next category is a... That was our Guggenheim, bitches. Hello there! It's the end of part one, so thank you so much for listening to this. Just come back a little later for part two.

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