Watch What Crappens - #2431 RHONJ, Part 2 S14E03: Guys and Blowup Dolls

Episode Date: May 20, 2024

This is part 2Joe Gorga celebrates his birthday on The Real Housewives of New Jersey (S14E03) with what else? Focaccia letters! Plus, Jen Fessler finds herself caught between Rachel, Margaret, and Tre. This won’t end well.  Afterwards, we check in on the Summer House Martha’s Vineyard (S02E09) season finale around 29:00 minute mark. Grab tickets for our European tour at watchwhatcrappens.com Watch this recap as a video and get our bonus episodes at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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from Wondry and Tinkercast, where hip hop and fables meet. Listen to Once Upon a Beat early and ad free right now on Wondry+. Once Upon a Beat. Hi everyone, welcome back! This is part two of a two-part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, well go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe so that way you always get your episodes. But enough of that, let's get right back into the episode. So now Jackie enters alone, no Evan. And she's like, Oh wow, what a party. No one knows her.

Hello, how are you? How are you Jackie? How are you? Hi, Jackie. It took me so long to get here. I know it's crazy. You know what we should talk about? We're such good friends. Do you want to talk about the weather? Let's talk about traffic. Let's talk about traffic. It's so much traffic. It's so much traffic. So much traffic out there. It's insane.

Am I done with this scene with Jackie? Jackie's gone. Jackie's a temp. Am I done with this temp? I just don't know how many conversations I can have stopping at the Roy Rogers on the Jersey Turnpike. Okay, it's done. So then Frank Catania shows up and he walks up to Joey B. He's like, hey, what's up, my brother? What are we drinking? He's like, I'm not drinking right now. Oh, you're gonna know, right? You're gonna. He's like, yeah, I drank a lot last night. Joe, Joe, no drinking for you. I'm not drinking tonight, Frank. So then we get a little scene with the two noobs

and Melissa and Antonia, because Antonia is gonna be going to school. So they're like, he's so nervous. And she's like, please stop hugging me, mom. I hate, I hate emotions. Which, you know, I feel my to my core so then Dolores and Polly come Dolores is like oh hello is everyone having fun wait let me take that from the top hello sorry it's gotta do it gotta do it hello hello there got it you're a good woman Dolores

hello yeah she's a good woman redoing's me, Dolores. Hello. Yeah, she's a good woman. Redoing her hellos. She's really helping out. Look at all these big kids growing up so fast. Everyone's a giant, giant child. Look at the gorgas. Oh my God, what are they? 70 years old now? They're still slightly taller than Joe.

How does that happen? How does that happen? Come here. So they're all hugging and stuff. And then Dolores, Polly, Danielle and Nate are talking and they're talking about how beautiful the party was. And then Jen Fessler comes over and is like, she orders a drink or whatever. And let's see here. And Jackie's like, you know, it would be nice if Danielle even said hello to me. I don't understand the hatred. I really don't. I'm like, Jackie, you were like, you know, it would be nice if Danielle even said hello to me. I don't understand the hatreds. I really don't. I'm like, Jackie, you were like, you were going after Danielle

all of last season. And then I you're like, well, I don't understand why she doesn't like me. I was just pointing out that she dressed like trash. That's all. It's not bad. I liked her. She's like a nice person. Okay. So now the guys are talking and Frank's like, hey, what's happening over here? And Joe's like, well, obviously these two had beef the other night, you know, Polly and John. And so then we see a flashback to the beef, okay, which was basically food to be like, hold on, hold on, hold on.

I'm probably going, can I talk now? Can I talk now? Or would you like to iron like a woman? So we cut back and Joe Gorga is like, you know, I don't like people fighting. All right. Everyone who's mad, let's get your dicks out and put up, put it into this blow up doll. Let's do it right now. All right. Joe Gorga. I don't like Joe. I don't like people fighting Gorga as we go on to year 35 of him not talking to his sister. So exactly. Hey Joe Gorga, you want to do another scene talking about how your only family is,

would be fine. It's been a week. I know. So Polly's like, you know, if somebody's beef, somebody's beef with somebody is their beef with somebody else. And if you got a beef with somebody and you don't have a beef with someone else, then

you got to go to a like be like a Wendy's commercial and say, where's the beef? Because it's not mine. Okay. So it should be belonging to no one else but us. Is that what you understand what I'm saying? I couldn't really follow that. But you know, I'm just gonna move on at this point. Thank you very much, John Fuda. So basically, it seems like they kind of like bury the, you know, bury the hatchet over whatever their little little tiff was at the party. It seems like everything's fine Food is like I'm just getting so attacked on multiple levels everywhere. I turn attack attack John food. Ah, you're not a housewife Doing too much sir, Okay, take a break.

So then Rachel and Margaret are talking and they're just so distracted by who is talking. To do with this part, like around like, oh my God, did you see her talking to her? Oh my God, did you see her talking to her? Did you see the boys talking to the boys? Did you see the girl talking to the boy? Like this obsessed.

So Margaret, it's good. Minus, you know, like we did have crazy morning. Did you hear the joke called Bill to invite him here? And Bill's like, no, we're declining the offer, you know, because the girls need to talk. And I was like, oh my God, this is not good. This is not good. Listen, I got to be honest, I wouldn't have come here either. I mean, look at this place. It's a dump. It's like, really, you wouldn't have come here? Okay, wait, what if I told you, did you hear this? Jennifer, Jennifer, she served feta cheese this morning, part of a Turkish breakfast, whatever that is, in quotes.

Am I right? Is that the wildest thing you ever had, feta for breakfast? Yeah, I don't really have an opinion about that. But like, Teresa, that's like, you know what that's like? That's like Teresa calling me and saying, do you guys want to like, um, I don't know. I don't really, I don't really have another part of the metaphor. I just want to say it's like Teresa calling me. So that way we could

start talking about Teresa. You want to talk about Teresa and Margaret? Oh, sure. Sure. It's fine. Don't even bother. You don't even have to do a segue. We just can talk about it. Okay. It's basically like, I get it. It's not a safe environment for her, you know, and Margaret's like, I know, I know. You know what, who I want to talk to? Speaking of not safe, Jen Fessler. Because you know what, speaking of safe, walk to her a little bit. You know what, are you annoyed with her?

Are you annoyed with her? And she's like, oh yeah, because you know what? She's my friend. And it's not a fight to fight. Okay, I've got to talk to her. I've got to talk to Jen Fessler. She was nice to Teresa at a doctor. I've got a doctor. She was nice to Teresa to party. Seven years old. My god. I know. Meanwhile, Rachel, I don't let people in. And I really let Jen in and I consider her to be family. Oh, you don't let people in. Okay. Meanwhile, we hear every single like thing. It's like, oh, today, I went to the supermarket.

They're out of pudding. I cried for five minutes in the parking lot. It was terrible. So she's like, you know, when I have a friend and they're allowing someone to be in their lives that is trying to hurt my husband, that's hurting me. I don't think she realizes that. Your husband just made an IMDB because of the television show you're on. You're going to have to get over this. Stop your fucking whining. So Margaret's like, listen, you know, I've been annoyed that by giggling in the corner, acting like everything's fine. So let me just have a drink. We'll sit and talk. Surely everything's going to go great. Yeah. So then we cut over to Teresa and Louis.

They're going to lunch at a place called Phoenician where they meet up with this woman named Jacqueline who is not Jacqueline Larrita, but it's Teresa's friend from way back when. Teresa's like, oh my God, you know I know her 30 years. And so this is her Jacqueline's restaurant and Teresa gives the backstory on Jaclyn just in case we want her as a friend of. Yeah, I know Jackie since I'm 21. She started working at the Lancome counter in Macy's and I was like working at buying office in Macy's

and I just started talking to her cause I thought she was like really pretty and she worked at Lancome, you know, which I was like, oh my God, someone finally made a comb to comb land. And I was like, finally a land comb. She's like, No, it's a brand. I was like, Oh my God, you're pretty. And we became friends right after that. And yeah, so she and they she's the reason that Teresa met Dina. So Jacqueline may not

bring a whole lot of acceptance free dinners, but she brought us the show because without Jacqueline, this would have happened. Now is this Rails? No. And I think that's the only thing on Jacqueline right now is like, congratulations on everything you've accomplished, Jacqueline. I'm sorry that you didn't make Rails. Sorry. Yeah. Then you would have been a real star. So it's another dinner for Gabriella. This is just, we don't have to recap this, right? It was just like the kids like, oh Then you would have been a real star. So it's a dinner for Gabriella. We don't have to recap this, right? It's just like the kids like, oh my God, we're so sad Gabriella's leaving. Gabriella's leaving.

And Jacqueline's like, you want some free breadsticks? Jacqueline's. I'll serve you some of our favorites. So we go back to Joe's party and Melissa is like, okay, everyone who's next for an ass shot. And so the guys are pouring shots into Josephina's asshole and then doing them. And they're goofing around and stuff. And I was really amused that the producers gave Josephina a chiron and said, Josephina, and then under it said blow up doll. So I was like, okay, she got a chiron. I mean, Josephina is kind of killing it more than the noobs, I have to say

than the friends up so far. So far I'm into Josephina the most. So then we see Jennifer's singing. She's like, I'm not going to go to a party to film with these idiots. I can do everything on my own. I'm taking Olivia to play. So they go to a carnival and play some whack-a-mole. Olivia hurts her finger. It's a great scene. So then we go back to Joel's part. Pauly is like, are you guys having a nice time? Dolores is like, so nice. Hello. in a nice time. And Dolores is like, so nice. Hello. So Frank is like, hi, Dolores. So I want to talk to Dolores right now, OK?

Because obviously, you both are an integral part of my life as well. And something big's coming. And when something big's coming, I always talk to Dolores. OK? And I've got a serious thing coming up. And the kids are like, I want to talk to Dolores. So I'm like, OK. All right, So I want you to know, I'm going

away. All right. Going away to Costa Rica. I'm like, oh shit, what happened? Who did he snitch on? Then he goes, I'm going to ask, Brittany, engage. I was like, oh, oh. Like, I feel like on this show, if you say you're going away, it means you snitch on someone or you got snitched on, right? Or you didn't pay your, you didn't pay your tile, your pebble tiles bill or something. He's like, I gotta protect my knees. We saw that last time. It is.

But it turns out he looks like he's going to be in Costa Rica and I'm going to get engaged to Britney. Okay. And she's like, Oh God, is that a wall? You scared me, Frank. Geez. All right. Just don't be gone too long. I still don't have a railing. I still have a stair railing. That's Frank. That's beautiful. I thought you were going to- For you, glad to get married. Literally,

can't believe she's marrying you, but good for her. Listen, I've never been proud of two overcooked sticks of bacon. Okay? Congratulations to the both of you. Frank, I'm just glad you didn't announce that you were adopting a chinchilla that was going to peel all over you again. So honestly, anything makes me happy. Yeah, and everybody knew that they were meant to be. But of course, Frank's going to take forever to ask because he's Frank, what are you going

to do? But I saw them at BravoCon and I was like, yeah, those two are meant to be together because they stood at the stairway and the rest, well, I was at the Four Seasons one day and they were standing, because that's where they all stayed, and so they were standing in front of the stairway and she's like, take a picture. He's like, all right, I'm going to get your picture. She's like, all right, now let me look at the picture. So he'd bring up the camera and show, give me another, do it again, do it again. And she'd like flick her hair and move it around.

And he'd be like, all right, all right, I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna do it. All right, I'm gonna get three. And then she'd come over and he'd show her the three and she's like, do it again. And this went on. I mean, it was like a Maiden Paul documentary. It just went on and on.

And I was like, that's your your right there. That's when you know you found the right man. When he's like, we're going to do this until we find your correct angle. Yeah. So then Frank turns to Dolores and says, I mean, who'd have thought I'd get engaged before you? And Paul is like, haaaar. So- I've got to get divorced first, don't you? It's not a fun joke. It's a hilarious joke. And the lawyer goes, one's got nothing to do with the other. All right?

We can be excited for you and also be excited for our future. Right, Paulie? Right? Paulie has a future, hopefully, of making a bed. Am I right? I'm growing boobs on becoming a woman. Listen, one thing has nothing to do with another. It's like the kitchen and the living room and back to the kitchen

again. They don't have anything to do with each other. That's why you got to walk back and forth between them. That's all. That's all. Okay, so now the boys are talking and Frank and Joe are talking about how close Stacey youutch. I'm like your Sonny Crockett to Ricardo Thubbs. I'm like the Sonny, you're the Bono. Hey, there you are. You know, you are, listen, I'll admit it.

I look for you, it's like without you, I'm like, where's my boy? Where's my buddy? Well, Joe Gorgon, I got some very serious news to tell you. I gotta go away for a little bit. It's gonna be tough. You're not gonna see a lot of me. Ah, not the Pebble Tiles.

You pay for the Pebble Tiles, huh? No, what are you talking about? I'm just going to Costa Rica for the weekends. Why are you getting so upset? All right, brother, I'm worried about your niece, all right? You're on him enough. Listen, listen. I said some things I shouldn't have said

to some people I shouldn't have told to, and now I'm in a whole bunch of trouble Hey, you need some place to hide? No, I just I told Brittany I want to get married to and I shouldn't have said it so soon Okay, so then Marge is hanging out with Rachel and See her Marge go Do I have a wrinkle above? Oh, I think this was Dolores who said this I might have written it wrong No, it was Margaret. It was Margaret. It was Margaret. Yeah, so I have a wrinkle above my… Oh, I think this was Dolores who said this. I might have written it wrong. No, it was Margaret. It was Dolores.

It was Margaret who said that. It was Margaret. Yeah. Do I have a wrinkle above my boob? I think I'm getting a little wrinkled there. A little upper boob wrinkle. Okay. I'm stressing out.

Okay. So Jennifer Fassler comes up. She's like, hello, my loves. Oh, hi, babe. What's going on, babe? What are you doing? She's like, oh, wow. I mean like, Oh, you look, you're looking quite fabulous. You look very Hamptons actually, which is

funny. Like since when does Rachel Fuda a an expert on Hamptons looks, but she's like, Oh, yes, yes, I feel very Hamptons right now. Very like imagine Hamptons but with 95% logitech. So basically, they sit down Marge just goes right in. She's like, oh, well, you know, that was really fun when I saw you with Teresa. Just giggling. Ha ha ha. Teresa. Oh my God. Look at you.

I love Teresa. Oh my God. Vote for Teresa. Vote for Teresa. You were asking for donations. Like, what are you doing? Let's have a GoFundMe for the I love Teresa. How much you love Teresa? Why don't you just get married? T-E-R-E-S-A-G-I-S-S-I-N. I don't even remember the kids. Get married in a tree, okay?

Because you love tree so much. How much do you love Teresa? How much do you love her? What is it, Valentine's Day for you and Teresa? Oh, Marge. Marge coming in hot. Subtlety Marge. I know Margaret really is. She's blowing her load way too early. So Jen Fester's like, I mean, what? What's the alternative? What you want? She sits down and goes, honey, and I'm supposed to say, fuck you. I'm like,

that hasn't stopped other people in the past, by the way. This is real as well as New Jersey. Yeah, that's how Jennifer does it. Yeah. She's like, let's go bring it to others. She's just upset because she heard I said something about we had a plan and you screwed it up. All right. And then you guys did create a plan to take down Louis. And Marge was, oh, please, Louis planned his own demise. All right. Right. Well, that's what I said to her. I was like, by the way, you are no explanation. It's like, yeah, that's right. What Rachel said, you know, I would have just been like, fuck off. I would have been like, fuck off. And if you want to buy something from the Macbeth collection, that is still something I'm doing so you can buy something.

And then Margaret says that, she's like, no, Jennifer just has to stop the bullshit and just say, I'm a wuss. You know, I'm not good when I'm confronted. I have diarrhea at the bullshit and just say, I'm a wuss. You know, I'm good. I'm not good when I'm confronted. I have diarrhea at the mouth and I fucked up. And then I'd say, fine, that's who you are. But isn't this like, didn't, um, didn't Margaret actually play this exact role when she first came on the show? Wasn't this her issue, her fallout with Siggy Flicker, right? Wasn't that Siggy Flicker had a real issue with, with, did Siggi have an issue with Teresa or is it Danielle? Siggi had an issue with someone and Margaret played both sides. Like, why can't it be nice to both people? Like there's nothing wrong with being friends with both people. Well, now Margaret has the whole, but she came from my children. And when you come from my children, you know, that's the, that's the housewives thing.

If you come for the children, then you can't say anything. That's why Rachel keeps saying over and over, they came from my family. They came from my children. Which they're not necessarily wrong, but you know, I don't know, they're kind of all adults now. Most of these children, not food is children, but she didn't come for food is children. You know what I mean.

I don't know, the show. The show's all like, you came from my children. I dare you. So that's where she's got it. And also, I think she feels like I brought Jennifer Fessler on the show and now Fessler is immediately jumping to the Teresa camp, which I don't know that she's necessarily like I said, subtlety. It's just being played wrong.

This is what I think. So then Marge is like, well, why don't, why do you care that she thought you spoke poorly about Louie? You do. You speak poorly about Louie. And she's like, well, why do you care that she thought you spoke poorly about Louis? You do, you speak poorly about Louis. And she's like, poorly about Louis at all, ever, ever. I do not. And she says, yes, you do, incessantly you do. And she goes, no, we're not gonna go there.

You're not gonna say that I speak poorly about Louis. And she goes, okay, does she speak poorly about Louis, Rachel? And she goes, we don't speak about Louis, but I will say, she goes, well, okay, whenever you've spoken about Louis or I've spoken about Louis, does Jen Festa say a kind word about Louis? Okay, well, does she speak about Louis or not? It doesn't matter.

What did she say? Because if she didn't, you can't just say her not saying anything nice about Louis is the same as speaking incessantly, terribly about Louie. I mean, come on now. So Jackie, who is already putting the plan in motion to go defect to Teresa's side, as evidenced by the fact that she now wants to be friends with Danielle, we should know it. She's like, why does it matter how much everyone thinks about Louie? Why are you getting so worked up? why are you getting so worked up?

Why are you getting so worked up about, about Teresa and Louie? Like where did this come from, from Jackie, Jackie who has had like, who's always hated Teresa and who has been fully on team market with this entire situation. Now it's like, well, so what does it matter? What does it matter if she cares about if're just friends with Louie? Who cares? So Marge is like, you come in here and sugarcoat shit. Okay, I will not tolerate that. She goes, no one's sugarcoating anything, Margaret. Okay, no one's denying that they said anything about it, Margaret. Okay. And

she's like, do not speak for Jen Fester bullshit. It's not gonna fly with me today. Jen Fester say something horrible and sessically terrible about Louie. No, you're not gonna say fight with me today. Jen Fester, say something horrible and sassily terrible about Louis. No, you're not going to say anything nice about Louis. Horrible things she just said about Louis. Horrible. You do it. Okay. You know what, Rachel?

Rachel, you know, she's really pissed me off just now. Jackie's really pissed me off. She's, I know, I know. That was inappropriate. And Jen Fester's like, okay, well, you know what? This is escalating too fast. Margaret, Margaret, Margaret. And Rachel's like, take, well, you know what? This is escalating too fast. Margaret, Margaret, Margaret. And we're just like, take a deep breath.

Take a deep breath. Plus, no, no, no, I'm not gonna sit here. I'm not gonna sit here with Jen Fester lying and Jackie saying those things, ridiculously sugarcoating things. Jen Fester's like, no, I'm saying to you, excuse me. No, you're, no, let me get a word out. Would you just let me get to what you over talk everybody?

He's like, oh, I over talk everybody? You're saying that to me when you're Margaret Joseph. No, you talk over everyone. I talk over everyone. Turns into one of those fights. Yes. It's like you are you are you are you are you are you are you are you are. So Jen's like, and then you come at me with you talk about him and says, yeah, I do not talk about him. It says, Lisa, no, no, I didn't say that. I said, you never have kind words say about it. And she's like, so you thought I was like, you thought I was gonna sit down with Teresa and say, you know what, I just want to let you know, by the way, so nice to we're sharing, and your

husband is disgusting. Is that what you wanted me to do? And she's like, well, I'm not saying that she goes, and you realize I'm not going to do that. I'm not your soldier, Margaret. And then it's like, don't, don't, don't. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappence commercial. I'm Shimon Yai, and I have a new podcast called The Competition. Every year, 50 high school senior girls compete in a massive scholarship competition. I wouldn't say I have an ego problem, but I'm extremely competitive.

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and ad free right now by joining Wondry Plus. I'm Alaina, an autopsy technician. And I'm Ash, a hairstylist. And we just love swapping stories about all of the morbid things that fascinate us. And if you do too, join us on our podcast, Morbid. It's a safe space to let your weirdo flag fly. On Morbid, we cover dark historical events, sinister science, unnerving paranormal events,

and sordid high society murders. We also dive deep into the most notorious crimes in history. Our podcast is grounded in rigorous and painstaking research. We're also not afraid to read a b******. We keep it weird because a dash of snark is necessary to get through grotesque true tales of demented minds. So follow Morbid on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Morbid early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus.

It was the biggest scandal in pop music. The stars of Milli Vanilli, the Grammy winning multi-platinum R&B phenomenon were exposed as frauds. But none of this was their idea. So whose idea was it? Enter German music producer Frank Farian. He saw the success of acts like Michael Jackson and Prince, and he wanted in no matter the cost.

So he devised the perfect pop heist. Two once-in-a-lifetime talents who were charismatic, full of sex appeal, and phenomenal dancers. The only problem? They couldn't sing. But Frank knew just how to fix that. Wondery's new podcast, Blame It on the Fame, dives into one of pop music's greatest controversies and takes a never-before-heard look at the exploitation of two young Black artists. Millie Vanilli set the world on fire, but when the truth came out, Rob and Fab were

the only ones who got burned. Looking back now, it's hard not to wonder, why did everyone blame them and not the man pulling the strings? Follow Blame It On The Fame, Millie Vanilli on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Blame It On The Fame early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus. So Rachel's like, I think that what Margaret's trying to say is that there's a lot of time spent in the conversation that Jen was having with Teresa and she saw them laughing. So immediately being as close as we are, right? Like immediately immediately you're like what the fuck is you doing?

You know and Jen festers like okay, you know what you're both coming at me really hard right now, okay? So settle down James Gandolfini. I'm not gonna handle the things the way you handle things, okay? I will handle my shit my way, okay? I got you, but I'm not gonna be you and I'm and I'm not gonna do that And you want me to do that and say you want me to say and you want me to do what I'm doing things It's a but I was gonna say but I'm gonna do it the Fesla way because I've always done it the Fesla way. So Rachel starts her whole like, I am not gonna tell you who to be friends with.

Oh my God, am I crying? But if you're gonna be friends with her, like I can't because she's like come from my family. She's come from my family. How could you be friends with her? You're trying a power move that you have not earned. Period. And Jen Fessler is new. She's not even, she's still a friend of on this show. Why is she going to choose your side, Tile lady? No. Yeah. And Margaret's basically like, you know, it's just like, it's weird. It's weird. Because you knew us first. Okay. You knew us first. You fucking knew us first. Okay. I'm like,

yeah, but that's also you knew sticky flicker first I mean not to defend sticky flicker and I love markler but like you come on You know how to get you know how this works. You know this works in these shows. This is this is Jersey So we know the rules right? I we drove together Dolores and says We drove together and I'm leaving with her and I think that's what Marge is saying. She's like, what the fuck? I bring you onto this show.

You act like you hate me, so I'm right along with everybody else. And then the second the cameras start rolling, you go in there and start looking Teresa's asshole all over the place. I mean, it is frustrating. Which is true. That is very frustrating.

That is true. What's happening is true. I know, you don't have to. The thing that's killing me is watching Marge handle it this way because I just know, it's just terrible handling of it. It's the way to get the audience to immediately turn on you. When you have legitimate gripes against Teresa,

but you can't come in here acting like, oh my God, it's like because she called my, Louis called my child at work or whatever. When you were doing the Louis thing that could have, she she it's just she was doing the Louie thing last year that was going to give Teresa's family. It's like it's my family, my family, my family. It's just she's handling it wrong. And it's killing me. Even as we even as we recap it, I'm like, wait a second, I'm

coming down to Margaret. But the truth is, it does suck. It does suck. I've like she spent like a year being like, God, fuck Teresa, right? And Jen Fester was like, yeah, fuck her, fuck her. And the cameras roll for season two of Jen Fester. And she's like, kind of being like, I love Teresa now. Margaret's like, wait, what the hell? But like, again, it's like, there's something about Teresa that if you come hard for her, like the people who come hard for her, you're always like, why are you coming hard for Teresa? You know, even though, like you said, Margaret has legitimate gripes in this situation. So anyway, Rachel goes inside, she's crying. Well, I just wanted to see, I just want to see it played better as a housewife. I just

want the housewifery to be better. I want it to be like, okay, so I see Jen Fessler immediately kind of betraying me to go be friends with Teresa. So she needs to look at it like, oh, now I've got a spy in Teresa's camp and I can start manipulating Jen Fessler. I can start manipulating Teresa from my camp through Jen Fessler. But instead she's like, you can't be friends with her. This is bullshit. And they're trying to divide up instead of like giving me some good, you know, mysterious twisty turny political espionage. Yeah. So Margaret goes into the house looking for Rachel and you know, she finds Rachel and Danielle walks in on them and everything and Danielle is just asking, you know, what

happened? And Margaret says, you know, we're having a thing with Jen Fessler and Rachel is like, you know, like her relationship with Teresa, it's like, it's like, it's hard to look at your best friend, the I and be like, I'm okay with that because like, it hurts me, you know? And then Jen Fester is outside talking to Jackie, being like, you know this whole baby thing, it's like, just happen. Like, you don't love me. She's basically getting frustrated and Jackie's like, it's not you.

They're very upset. It's like, it's baby bullshit. That's what this is. It's baby bullshit. That's all it is. So she gets, Jen Fester gets herself annoyed and she's like, you know what? I'm sick of this. I'm going to go home. I'm leaving, leaving this party. Don't want to deal with this immature, you know, it's my way, my friendship or Teresa's friendship thing. So now Danielle is talking to Marge and Rachel

and Rachel's still doing her whole like, I cannot believe that my best friend is treating me like this. I mean, Danielle, you're friends with Teresa and I'm still look at how close we are. You hate Danielle. What are you talking about? You've been friends for five seconds. Rachel's doing this thing where she's acting like she's been on the show a decade and she's like, I cannot believe my best friend of 30 years, Jen Fessler is betraying me after someone came from my family, Danielle, look how close our friendship is, even though you're still friends with Teresa. You've been friends with Danielle for two seconds.

Give me a fucking break. She's too much. Well, she's like, you know, it's one thing, I know that you're friends with Teresa and that works for us because, you know, because like you say something, it just is there. You know, you don't say, and I'll vent us because you know, like, you know, because like I say, like you say something that just is there, you know, you don't say, you know, and I'll vent to you and you just say like, oh cool, then here's a different perspective and that's all it is.

You know, but like Jen Fessler, she's like about my best friend, you know, like, and you're just like, I don't know, you're like one of these focaccia letters that's here on the side of the sofa, you know, it's like, you're nice, you're nice to look at, might want to take a bite out of you, but I'm not going to like take you home or anything like that. But Jen Fessler, that's a good friend. You, you know? It's like, you're nice, you're nice to look at, might wanna take a bite out of you, but I'm not gonna like take you home or anything like that. But Jen Fessler, that's a good friend. You, you're fine. But Jen Fessler, she's the best. She keeps on comparing the two friendships

and like really like underlining how much like she's not actually a friend to Danielle. I like that Danielle is still so easily swayed by everything going on around her. She's like, yeah, I would do that, you know? Cause like, and you're right, cause like if that was my best friend, oh, and She's like, yeah, I will do that. You know, because like, and you're right. Because like, if that was my best friend, oh, and she's my best friend, you're a friend. Yeah, that was my friend. And she was

doing that shit to me. You'd be mad, right? I'd be so mad to be furious, right? I'd be so furious. I'd get ready to kill her, right? I'd kill her right now. Where's my dad? I'll kill him too. I'm gonna kill my dad. I'm gonna crash them into each other. So I'm gonna kill him. I'm gonna kill both of those motherfuckers." Like she's ready to go at what anybody they point her at. So Mara just felt like, I just can't. I have nothing here. Excuse anybody being nice. Stop. So they're making their last stand in episode three. That's it. It's like whoever sides there is going to side there and whoever is going to side here is going

to side here. You're going to lose this one. And Margaret's like, you know is going to side there and whoever is going to side here is going to side here. And Margaret's like, you know, I just get so frustrated and Jackie's like, and just gets in the middle of it. I'm like, why are you getting in the middle of it? That's for me to get in the middle of it. Why are you getting in the middle of it? So now Jackie, now Margaret, more seeds are being planted that Margaret and Jackie are falling apart, et cetera. And basically Jen Fessler leaves the party and, um,

Jackie is Jackie feels bad for her. And, uh, yeah, you know, we're seeing it basically ends with Joe Gorga now getting sentimental cause Antonia is going to be going off to college soon, which means that the next episode is going to be Antonia's goodbye and long dinners for Antonia and all that stuff. And they do a family photo and it's like, you know, I guess nice. Yeah. And that's pretty much it. The rest of it's just little party stuff. You know, Joe gives a speech and they show off the cake, it's Italian theme, but not the party because they don't want everything to be Italian theme.

And then it just says the end, but it's spelled out in bread. Yeah. Okay, so, Real Housewives of New Jersey. All right. They're making terrible moves over there, cast mates of that. No one needs this. I need you in the same room, I need you fighting.

Period. Okay, make it happen. All right, let's move on to Summer House Martha's Vineyard, the season two finale. Yes, season two finales. So the big thing that happened in this finale is that Summer, you may not have heard this, but her nana's having surgery.

I don't know if this was news to anyone. Her nana's having surgery. Yeah, it's happening. So her nana's having surgery. Yeah, it's happening. So her Nana's having surgery and she just has like a lot on her mind and she realized after one day of sobriety that she shouldn't be in this house. She needs to go figure something out. And also her Nana's having surgery.

So Summer decides that she's going to leave two days early, two days before the end of shooting just because those 48 hours are going to be the 48 hours that are going to turn things around for her. Yeah. And she goes around to everybody and she's like, I'm having some issues in my own life and I need to go. Literally everybody she talks to is like, mm hmm. Like, okay, this is by now. This is the girl. Well, I will go say bye to this person now. So then she goes to the next group and they're like, uh huh. Bye. Don't let the don't let the door hit you where the good Lord split you. Okay. And this is the same girl who like last week or two

weeks ago, complained that being friends with Jordan and Preston is like really hard because they just are always it's always something serious with them. It's like always so serious. Meanwhile, every single episode of summer is like, I'm just like going through a lot right now. I'm just like, really internalizing emotions. And like, I just feel like I'm just like, not where I need to be. And like, I'm just like going through shit right now. Yeah.

So she leaves and I know well doesn't even get out of bed to say bye to her. She's like, bye. Also, Summer doesn't go in to say goodbye to Noel, I'd like to add. Yeah. So that's over between those guys. I guess I just put it on Noel because someone texted her and they were like, she's leaving? You're going to say bye? Jasmine did. And she's like, no, no, not. So that was it, I guess, between them. And then Nick was coming in about everybody starting stuff with Tasia about him being flirty.

So he brings that up again. And then, you know, Brea gets all upset with him, of course. And the second this guy starts standing up for himself, he's like, what the hell? I mean, if you've got something to say, just say it. She's like, he is being disrespectful and I will not speak to him raising his voice to me. So she stomps off. Yes, she stomps off.

But you know what though, she was totally right in this case. It's rare that Brea's storm-offs are actually fully justified, but in this case, I think it was because Nick is the one who was acting pervy earlier in the season and is the one with the wandering eye. This was a situation where basically Amir's messy-ass girlfriend brought girl talk to Nick and made it sound like they were all claiming that he had groped them or something. And so then he's like yelling at them and she's like, uh-uh, like you need to like shut the fuck up because you have to listen to our side of this.

So totally justified with her storm off. But she's also not telling her her side. She's pretending she didn't say anything. And she's like, I didn't say anything. I didn't say one single thing. I don't even know what that girl was talking about. And then they cut to her being like, a memory of her being like, oh, well, yeah,

if he had the chance, he'd totally get with us. Like he'd fuck around on her in one second if he actually had the chance. And then they cut back to her. She's like, I don't even know what you're talking about. So they're kind of gaslighting him, but I do agree with the whole creepy, and that's it. If you're going to be kind of flirty with people, then I don't know if they're kind

of allowed to say it. But I also think Monica's the messy one here. Of course, getting away with it because they make them leave. Wait, was Monica still here at this part? Or did they leave already? Her name is Natalie, but I think she's gone at this point. Monica was never there. R&B singer Monica.

But then Nick has a good conversation with the women, they clear the air, everything is fine. So that entire thing kind of just settles down, everyone understands where they're coming from. Nick realizes whatever. But then it becomes Amir who gets upset because then Amir starts feeling like he's getting dragged into it. It becomes clear that Natalie was the messy one, right? And so then Amir gets upset because he feels like Natalie is getting dragged into this and she wasn't doing anything wrong even though she she was clearly doing the most in this situation. Yes. So he gets up, so when does he bring it? So basically the couples of the couples weekend, it's time for them to leave. So they get, and then, let's see what else happened

here. Amir, Amir, Amir. So Amir is getting upset and then he starts coming for Bria and he's basically saying like, why are you acting like he's confronting Bria about saying this stuff. And then Bria is getting annoyed at Amir because it's like, this was all settled. She's like, I settled it with Nick. This has nothing to do with you. It's over. It's done. And Amir is like, why are you raising your voice at me? Which is always funny. Like, I mean, she was getting started to get agitated and her tone was agitated, but then it's Amir who like yells and is accusing her of yelling. So he just has basically like a hissy fit and a meltdown.

Yeah, he has a fit at her. So then what else happens here? Well, they had a great part where they all imitated each other for their final party gang? I like that. Yes. Party game. They were actually really good at imitating each other. They were really good. Was it Noelle who imitated Jordan without even saying a word? She just did like give like annoyed looks at people and they're like, oh, Jordan, that's Jordan. Who's doing Jordan? And then-

Perfectly. doing Jordan. And then don't forget that Alex had a party that was like where he brought his music collective to the beach. And of course, waves, waves, waves, waves, waves, waves, waves, waves, waves, waves. Because he can't just tell you, okay, I'm gonna have a, you know what I'm gonna have a musical collective moment again, you know, because that's his thing to sell. Like we had to do this last year, okay?

But this year he's doing it again. So I guess to vary it up, he's like, more obnoxious. It's going to be a listen to my music while you paint whatever my music's inspired you to create. It's like, oh my God, could you be any more fucking obnoxious? So he makes him do a paint and listen. Yes. And then his song is like waves with it. So she needs to like, well, he's saying waves. So I'm just making waves. And then the waves are like moving their way into a tiny little rectangle, which is the shock last one of the shots.

Summers like I think we can all agree that Shanice's painting is the worst dress painting of the group, right? Summers on a plane. Your painting looks the poorest. Waves, waves, waves. I was just singing a song with his music collective, his brother and his friend.

So they have that thing. And then Summer leaves early. And then the other thing that happened is that Jasmine is feeling alone. And she's like doing a confessional about feeling alone. But then they all come into the confessional and they're like, no, we're here for you. We're friends with you. And they all gather around her. And it's nice, I guess. It's nice.

They're all there for Jasmine. It's amazing how when you date a controlling asshole that's mean to everybody and completely how your friends don't like him. Isn't that crazy? She's like, yeah, it's just what. Oh, sorry. Sorry, there was an internet breakup there. So I thought you were done speaking, which is why I went wait, but I realized that you were still talking. What were we saying wait for? We forgot the most important part of the entire episode.

Oh. Which is Milo. Milo went missing. My baby. My hero of this show, Milo. Yeah, Milo, she was saying something like, yeah, you know, Milo, just go over there. Milo wanted food or something and she didn't give it to him. And then Milo ran away. Milo ran far, far away. And I like it. And then on the summer finale, something terrible happens to one of our favorites. And we just see Milo. Everybody's screaming Milo. Where are you?

They're sending out the search parties for Milo. Nobody can find Milo. We hear screaming and yelling and crying about Milo. Everyone is looking for my like where they see a footage of Milo actually pushing open the door, like the gate by the pool and like running off into the, into nowhere. Milo is basically like Lindsay on that one episode of Summer House when she went walking down the road. And so everyone stops, everyone's looking for Milo. They're all going into the wilderness. I'm like, enjoy all your Lyme disease you're about to get. I hope these people are doing tick tech searches. I don't know, like the Northeasterner

in me is like, don't go near the tall grass with shorts on. But, um, then like after like, was it 25, 30 minutes out of nowhere, Milo comes running back and they're all like, they're also happy. I was just like, do you realize what this dog just put you through? This is the worst dog on brotha. This is the best dog. I love him. They even gave him his own little testimonial because I don't think he really went anywhere. Did he? He's just hanging out. He went into the woods. My low

guys trust in Milo. Listen, actually he was doing the right thing. He was trying to get the hell away from Brea. Yeah. Natalie's like, Did you hear that? Little testimonial, which was really cute. I love Milo. that, Milo? They gave him his own little testimonial, which was really cute. I love Milo. I think Milo does a great job. We also found out that Simon is not Bria's soulmate, which I thought was interesting. They were talking about soulmates and she's like, yeah, he's not my soulmate.

And his soulmate is he's in Tribeca. An up and coming neighborhood. One day it'll get there. One day. Like that. So, um, and then she kept saying, no, no, he's not my soulmate. That's a whole other thing. Like, am I going to spend my life with him? Sure. Do I love him? Sure. Like for a slime and he's not the soulmate, but she's rich. Um, yeah, so that's pretty much how it ended. It sort of had some more sort of like minor,

minor, you know, moments. Like there was again, Amir and Bria getting into a fight. But other than that, it kind of just sort of like wrapped up. Everything wrapped up nicely. They did a whole thing where they were like, let's sit around after we just did a sip and see and let's apologize to each other. Yeah.

My part of whatever upset you this summer. And then it just gets to Jordan and Jordan goes, yeah, I'm not going to apologize for anything. I'm just going to move forward from things. And so it just kind of ended there. I was like, okay, well, great to have this talk. We all kind of hate each other. Glad that we're all on the show about how much, how close we are as friends. Let's, I guess, move on. So then it ends with Jasmine going into labor

and giving birth, and then we see little baby Cooper. And then of course Silas shows up after the labor is done. I mean, you can't even show up during the part called labor, you know, shameful. So he gets there, which is nice. So they have a little cute little baby. Yeah, I think I feel like the last shot or one of the last shots is just Silas basically holding the baby. And, you know, passing like art can pass on terrible habits to him. So that's basically that was it. That was season two of summer house. I was the big finale. You know, I guess we'll see what happens with season three.

I'm sure they'll get a pick up for season three, but you never know. I don't think it did too well in the ratings this time. So we'll see. But you know, it was fun. And and this episode was fun. So thanks, everyone, it was fun. And this episode was fun. So thanks everyone for being here. We surely appreciate you. And we'll be back tomorrow with some Below Deck. Bye everyone. Bye.

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