Watch What Crappens - #2519: RHODub S02E10 Part 2: Swingers in Bali
Episode Date: August 14, 2024This is part two of a two-parterThis week on Real Housewives of Dubai, Stanbury attempts to smooth things over with Ayan, and fallout from the dress debacle threatens to tear the group apart.... To watch this recap on video and listen to all of our bonus episodes, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Well hello and welcome to Watch What Happens.
This is part two of a two part recap.
If you're like, hey wait a minute, I didn't hear part one.
Guys, it's because we put out a lot of recaps. Go back and listen to part one, okay?
It's before this one. a lot of recaps. Go back and listen to part one, okay? It's before this one.
Bye, enjoy the show.
Okay, so then we go to Chanel getting her glam
and she's still stewing about Stamberry.
And she's like, I've really tried to get to know Stamberry
and now look at everything.
I cannot believe it.
I put so much work into this relationship.
I will never forgive her. I will never forgive her. And like, just in case people forget, this is just
Chanel not wanting to deal with the fact that she really was the one that fucked up in the situation.
And it's just easier to be mad at Stanbury than at herself. Let's be honest.
I mean, Stanbury did fuck up. It wasn't cool to share that voice note with everybody. It wasn't
her thing. It is pretty funny watching Chanel get this crazy over it when it was her bad.
Yeah.
I mean, yeah, maybe Stan Bray maybe like stepped out of line a little bit, but it's like not
to the point where it's like the friendship ends over it, right?
Like, and we've seen the flashback a little bit later.
It was all, it was brought up casually with a fun, like, ha ha ha.
And then, you
know, they joked about like, let's bring it up in Bali. So it was not, this was not like
a vaulted secret.
They did joke about it. And something else, something else that is really weird is that
Chanel said last week, this, what she was so pissed about was that she told Lisa before
the dinner about the voice note. And she said, someone sent me this voice note and
they're giving, no, no, she said, people are giving me pressure to play the voice note at the
dinner. So she told Lisa and what she got mad about was that Lisa pretended that she had never
heard of it and that she was suddenly so betrayed and that now she was saying she can't trust Chanel
and she's so betrayed when Chanel told her all of this beforehand. So it's all very confusing and I'm not really sure what's going on.
And also that Lisa is acting like she just shared the voicemail because she wanted a
clarification about who they're talking about.
When like Sarah is the one who showed that like, no, it was pretty obvious.
We were talking about Talene the whole time or whatever it was.
And now Lisa is going to play like, oh, what?
I had no idea. I was just,
it wasn't me being, I wasn't being messy on my end. I was just asking for clarification
from Chanel, even though if you really wanted clarification, you could have just asked
Sarah, like, wait, are you talking about to lean here? You know, like it's like, they're all kind
of, they've all kind of messed up and they're all blaming each other, someone else for the reason why they messed up.
Well, then it leads to the question, is it because not all the voice notes were sent? Like,
did Sara send some voice? Did Lisa only share the voice note that was confusing? And that's why
there was no context to understand it? Or did Chanel just misunderstand the whole thing?
The whole thing, it's like, it's kind of confusing no context to understand it. Or did Chanel just misunderstand the whole thing?
The whole thing, it's kind of confusing, but it's not mysterious enough to stay interested
in it.
It's also so stupid that the fact that friendships are going to end over this.
We know that Chanel and Lisa are no longer friends.
And I think this is the root cause of it.
This is where things start to go awry.
And to know that this is what caused it is so ridiculous.
Well, it seems like it, because it is like a petty little thing. But if it is true that
Lisa was saying, okay, I know about this voice note, you should bring it up at the dinner.
And then the minute Chanel does, Lisa goes, oh my God, you betrayed me. How could you
betray me? And then throws this big sobbing fit.
Like she's just been wronged by her best friend and she'll never be able to trust
again. I can see why Chanel would be like, fuck you. Using me for a storyline.
I thought we were friends and now you're going to villainize me to get like more,
you know, airtime. Fuck off.
Yeah. I think it's just there.
If this is truly what leads to their break as friends,
then there's deeper issues at play for sure.
So anyway, where were we?
Or it's Housewives.
Or it's just Housewives.
Yeah, or it's just Housewives-ery.
So now they're going to their activity days.
So we've got the ladies, some of the ladies doing the ATVs
and it is just wacky times guys.
It's wacky. And then the others go to, Stambury and Chanel go to their swing.
Yeah. So the ATV people are assembling and they're going to get on these ATVs. By the way, I would,
I am not an ATV person. None of this looked appealing to me whatsoever. I'm like, wow.
I am not an ATV person. None of this looked appealing to me whatsoever.
I'm like, wow.
Oh, hold on, hold on.
Wait for the shock to just wash over the audience
really quickly.
Gosh, you know what I would love to do
is get on a vehicle that famously flips over
and breaks people's necks.
And this time let's ride it through
like giant puddles of water and mud.
No.
One thing Ben loves, danger. Yeah. Ben loves danger.
What is the thrill from an ATV? Ben loves pointless danger.
What is the thrill? Where does the thrill come from?
Let's not forget invite only Cabo where that girl got thrown off of her ATV and
wound up in the hospital. I had fun. She'd do it again.
Let's just not forget that show in general. It was, it was a overlooked,
it was an overlooked classic. It was so good. Why did they not bring it back?
It was such a good show.
Yeah.
Okay.
So then, Stambury and Chanel make small talk at the swings and then they finally get into
it.
And she's like, look, we've gotten to a really good place and the message went left for both
of us. It was not how I expected it to go. And I didn't know it was from Lisa. Had I known it was
from Lisa, I wouldn't have done that to you. You know, you didn't tell me it was from Lisa. I can't,
I don't know who to properly villainize if you don't label the people, darling.
But I trusted you. And you called me out. And I was like, what? And I have my best friend who's
pissed with me, because she feels like, hey, I sent you that voice note for you. So now Lisa is like, I don't trust you, which I never
had someone say that to me and you blindsided me. And like, you didn't have to throw me under the
bus like that without talking to me, by the way, has the Apple corporation ever been more proud
that their voice note feature is finally being talked about in a relevant way.
Cause no one, like we all hate voice notes. No one likes,
no one likes to receive them and to hear it now talked so intensely about in a pop
cultural setting, Apple's like, finally, finally, finally,
we've been waiting years to get this thing off the ground for this thing to
sound like just Apple vision each other. We've been waiting for years for this thing waiting years. We've been waiting years. We've been waiting years. We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years.
We've been waiting years. We've been waiting years. We've been waiting years. We sent her my apple. We're getting this thing to work. My apple doodle. I couldn't believe it.
My apple doodle. I cannot believe you sent her that slow picture of a drawing of a heart going.
So has anybody ever made anything with that other than a heart?
That's the only thing I know how to do with that where you draw.
Yeah. Remember it? God, I hated those things. There was a period of time when they would come
up like they were really trying to push it. So they'd come up accidentally. So like there's
so many accidental little doodles you send to people. And by the way, Apple notes, I mean,
Apple voice notes, they are trying to make that a thing because I can't tell you how many times I
pick up my phone and it's been recording me like, Oh, you wanted to send a voice note. And she was
like, I was just walking around my kitchen for 10 minutes and now I have a
10 minute voice note that's about to be sent off to my mom, you know,
like stop and erase.
Oh yeah. I do that all the time.
How many times have you looked down at your text messages and it's been recording you for five,
five minutes, right?
Yeah, a lot, a lot of times.
And it's never recording anything good because when I think I'm not being
recorded, I mean, I'm like this normally, can you imagine what I'm like just walking around the house
pattering? Constant crazy. Okay. Okay. So basically, Stambury is just apologizing and
she's like, that wasn't my intention. I didn't mean to blow up your relationship. She goes,
well, then what was your intention? Well, she, you know, it wasn't the intention because
she didn't know it was from Lisa.
I was just trying to have a little bit of fun with Sarah and Brooks.
That's all I was trying to humiliate them.
Not you and Lisa.
You don't understand.
Have you ever heard of the concept of friendly fire?
It happens.
Okay.
So, Stamber is like, you know, she knows this was to poke a little fun at Sarah.
And by poke a little fun, I mean humiliate her, make her cry, make her leave the dinner
party, make her leave the show.
I don't know.
And she was having a laugh with me when she told me this.
And this is where we see the flashback of when Chanel brought up the
voice note to her and to lean like it was just, it was at this point, it's out there.
It's public. If it gets, if it, you know, if it, if it leaves that sphere of,
um, of well, whatever that, that protected sphere of voice note privilege, it's on you. You're
telling too many people.
Yeah. And Stember is like, yeah, she's mad at herself basically. And Ayaan says, you
know, I started to trust you and Lisa was like, she's going to screw you over, so don't
trust her. And I didn't listen. And then
you did, you know, you did exactly what she said. And one of my favorite things in the world is
when people tell me they trust me, because I've never done anybody like that. Yeah, but you did.
You just did it.
So, I mean, like doing all these monologues, I get why you're hurt and why you feel stupid,
and nobody likes to get yelled at by their friend, but you were the one who did that. You did it, you did it.
Semper is like, listen, how can I explain this to you? Last season, everyone had high expectations
from me and I was kind of a flop and you were the fan favorite. This season, I'm just trying to get
in with the fan favorite again. Why would I jeopardize that? I've done so much work. Why would
I just throw it all out over a voice note? Do you understand what I'm trying to say here? I was not trying to embarrass you.
Yeah, and so basically Chanel finally accepts it, you know, but she's like,
because Sam Bray says, we don't have to become best friends right now. Let's just take a step back.
But I really am sorry. I'm not going to bother you." And she's like, okay, I love that. So, then Chanel
goes, do I regret playing the voice note? No.
Okay.
Because that's what you go out with your friends and you connect about something stupid and
silly. And so now that she's forgiven Stanbury, she's like, now what I'm bothered about is
seeing Lisa in a different light because she called me out and said she doesn't trust me. So now she says, maybe I'm hating
Stanbury because I hate the feeling of how I felt that night, which is, I think, not a bad theory.
I think it's easier to hate Stanbury because they don't have as good of a relationship. But
the truth is she realizes she feels hurt by Lisa regardless of whether or not it's
entitled.
She does feel hurt by Lisa and that makes her, that's an uncomfortable place to be in.
So it's just easier to focus that energy onto Caroline.
But now Carol, the thing is this, Stanbury gave a really good apology.
Like she did not, there was no, but there was no, there was no, um, try to see it from
my point of view kind of situation.
She just kept on apologizing and Chanel when Chanel was protesting,
she just kept on apologizing and being like, you know, I can't make you trust me.
You just have like, you know, we're just gonna have to see what happens.
But she just was like,
she apologized sort of so relentlessly that Ion kind of had no, uh,
no other choice but to kind of accept it.
And that's when she realizes like,
okay, well, I can't really be mad at Caroline anymore.
So it makes me kind of have to confront my feelings
about Lisa.
Yeah.
So then back to the other ladies,
Sarah loves, I love writing ATV in Dubai.
I'm addicted to it. It's a good way to release
some adrenaline and get rid of some stress. You know, for someone so peaceful, Sarah is having
to scream into a lot of pillows and waterfalls and get on very dangerous thrill ride adventures.
That's a good point. And then they come up, come across a cow. Um, our note taker, Jessica
described the cow as an agile cow, which I think, I think that's a good way to put it.
An agile cow approaches them and this cow is not happy. This cow is like,
if I, this is the,
this cow is the equivalent of the lady saying like, okay,
if your ball gets onto my porch, I keep it. I'm keeping this ball.
And this cow was like, I'm sick of this ATV coming into my backyard. Okay.
You want to come into my backyard? You're going to get a piece of me. Okay.
This is my, this is my little piece of dirt. Okay, you want to come into my backyard, you're gonna get a piece of meat. Okay, this is my
this is my little piece of dirt. Okay, don't come here. Don't
come here.
I love when humans see cows and like, oh my god, it's a cow.
That's so scary. Get away from the cow. What do you think the
cow feels like you're gonna eat it, you're gonna grab its tits
and just start poking them. You're gonna force it to get
pregnant, steal those babies, they can keep giving you shit
for your cereal. Get the fuck out of here. You're scared of the cows.
We do way worse things to cows than they do to us. That's for sure.
Team cow. They're like, the cow's going to charge. I was like, team cow, 100%.
Talene's like, remember bad cow disease? This motherfucker had it.
So that cow does charge with them, which is great.
And I love Talene trying out all her new material on the show.
What's the deal with cows?
Am I right?
Utter madness.
Cows.
Wow.
That cat's really, that cow's really getting some camera time.
Huh?
Way to milk it, cow.
I wish that cow would just move.
Okay.
So now back to the swing. They're joking like, oh, any last words before we go with
the swing? And so they do the swing and it changes their life because it's really beautiful. And
Chanel does it and she goes, oh, no, it's beautiful. It's so beautiful, Caroline. I'm having like 1% forgiveness in you." She goes, oh great. And then, um, Caroline does it and she's just like,
oh disgusting. So now the ladies finished their ride and they had back to the
villa and Lisa's like, so how was the swing? And she knows like,
oh, I actually thought it was going to be scary,
but like once you get out there, it was so beautiful. She's like, well,
I'm glad you guys had fun. We got you back. How He's like, oh, it was hard when we first sat down,
but I was telling her what happened, but we're good.
We had fun after that.
So Lisa's like, you know what?
Ayaan and Stanbury, I'm stepping away from it
and I'm gonna let them deal with their shit
because I want no part.
I was like, okay, well, thanks for that update.
And then Saba and Sarah are talking about what to wear later.
Tropical suits, shawls, I don't know.
That's what they're talking about.
And then Saba's like, are you okay?
You seem really stressed.
Is it because you hate the culture of the people here?
Do you need to go another ATV ride
to release some of that anxiety?
And Sarah's like, I'm very stressed.
You know what, I have some issues in conflict with
the keen, my nut boyfriend who I want to move all the way to
another country. And so I was like, what's the problem? Well,
he got really upset because I'm going to do a podcast. And the
guy that wants to do a podcast like he's a sports figure, and
he has shirtless pictures. And he's and so he's like, a woman
should not be on a podcast with a guy who has shirtless
pictures. And I'm like, what? I'm getting paid $45K to be on this podcast.
Hey, no, you're not getting $45,000 to be on a podcast.
Yeah, that's true.
What are you talking about?
Well, unless, unless it was like,
what the fuck are you talking about?
Is it like a podcast deal or is it just like a guest spot? Because if it's a guest spot,
no, you're lying.
Yeah. And you know what I'm doing right now, right? I'm sorry that I got quiet, but I'm
Googling real housewives Akeem. Yeah, look at that.
Well, by the way, let's not take away from the point that this is absolutely like horrific
behavior on Akeem's part. Like, fuck you, Akeem. Like as much as Sarah is like so full of it on so
many matters, like she gets to decide
what she wants to do and you don't get to be a possessive piece of shit.
And by the way, you're the one who's shirtless on the Gram, so you better get over it, sir.
Well that's what I'm looking up to see, like if he's shirtless in all of his pictures,
because I mean, he's an Instagram trainer, so I'm sure he is.
He's shirtless on this show, doesn't even matter.
They have flashbacks of him shirtless on in the pool of this show
Okay, someone is allowed by the way people take off their shirts in life. It happens
So Sarah is allowed to well, especially when they work that hard on it
It's like asking Picasso to walk around with curtains to put over his paintings. That's not what he does. This art
Okay, what I mean, it's like asking to lean to not share her beautiful voice with the world
I mean, it's like asking to lean to not share her beautiful voice with the world.
You are the way beneath my wings. Besides, I can't got to do it guys share your arm and Sarah shows up on that guy's podcast. It's going to go in the
tank. It'll be the lowest rated episode. Yeah. Sarah's so fishy, though. I don't know what the
fuck she's talking about. So she's like, I don't know if they broke up. And so now she's like,
this is a keen who knows with her, but I'm shocked.
I'm shocked that it didn't work out with a keen. Let's just leave it at that.
So then you should do something about it. Thanks, Saba. Thanks for that.
Thanks for that insight. And Sarah tells us after I get back from Bali,
I have a big podcast scheduled.
It's about my awakening experiences and my entrepreneurship,
which of course I'm going to discuss with an athlete where I get to share my experiences with people
so I can help everyone in the community. And I get the phone call from Makin and he gave
me like an order. He's like, this podcast, you think that you're doing, you're not doing
it. So actually it sounds like she has a podcast deal and she's invited this athlete on and
the athlete is shirtless somewhere.
Well, who else would be doing a podcast about awakening experiences other than a guy
who's not got a shirt on?
Like, hello, does the king know how this works?
Okay, look at the chart.
I want to talk about my awakening experiences
and my entrepreneurship,
and I want to share my experiences with only hot people.
There's someone I used to follow on Instagram
who was like just like a hot guy.
And he started a podcast
and it was like all about relationships
and the only people he would have on his podcast
were other like models.
And I just thought it was so funny,
like models talking to models about relationships.
It's like, I don't know why it's like the only people
who have insight on relationships
and life are other models.
It's really hard being with someone whose hot mess is like similar to my own.
It's been a good week for that sort of commentary.
You know, what was the other show we just watched with that?
Oh yeah, Lodeck. When Gail was talking about her biggest insecurity is driving a tender boat.
And you mentioned how hungry you are.
Yeah, my biggest insecurity is letting the tender boat down or whatever she said.
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Georgia, do you know what joy sounds like?
I think I'm hearing it right now.
So then Sarah is like, you know, well, Saba is like,
you know, like if you're financially providing, fine, but there's not even a valid reason. He
doesn't even have a reason. Wait, by the way, she's very upset. No, it's not fine. Even if you are
financially providing, that's not fine. She's like, well, if you've been paying the bills,
then sure, he'd be allowed to tell you you can't go on to a podcast, but he's not even doing that.
No, he's not allowed to say what podcasts you are and aren't allowed to go on no matter how
much money he's contributing, which by the way is currently zero.
Yeah, but that's why I don't like hearing, and I'm actually glad to hear this conversation of
fuck this guy, because it really bothered me hearing the conversation they had before where
she was like, I really just want Akeem to be a traditional man and
take care of me and pay for everything. And I'm just going to be the traditional woman.
I just hate hearing shit like that. I really hate it. And so I'm glad that that's mostly
phony and that the second anything like that really happened, because that is kind of traditional
where the man's like, I'm a big jealous beast and you can't go out with other hot men, that is offending my manhood. What will other men think if I let you around
to shirk this man? And so I'm glad to hear that that's all bullshit on her part. And
when it really comes down to it, she's like, oh, fuck off. I meant you pay for shit. I
don't mean you get to tell me what to do because that part really pissed me off last time.
So she says, I mean, he says this guy is not good. He doesn't like him.
He doesn't know him on a personal level,
but he said this guy had a crazy lifestyle
and like, what do I have to do with it?
I'm like just doing my job.
Which makes me wonder, like, I,
Akeen seems like he's a real dick.
And so I am very anti Akeen right now,
despite him being super hot.
But I also wonder, like you said, Sarah sometimes,
like I never really know what to believe from Sarah. And it makes me wonder, like, was he saying,
like, you shouldn't have this guy on your podcast because he's like, he's garbage. And
he's gonna like, it's gonna be a bad look for you. And then she's saying, giving us
this version. But I also don't want to like not believe what she says, because this guy
sounds like he's a total dick. So I don't really, I'm leaning more towards
that she is a dick and I'm trusting Sarah on this one, but I also am like leaving the door open to
hearing another perspective. This is what I've learned to do with Sarah's storylines is not
She's a doctor. Okay. She's a doctor. Pete It always leads me into some moral quandary, and it doesn't seem like it would with Sarah,
but it's like, what is she even talking about? And is she, is this true? And some of the religious
stuff and some of the calling the police, I've just found it's just better to kind of assume
she's just kind of full of shit and just roll with it and just let it wash over me and then
move on to the next scene.
Jared So, Saba's like, what's that? shit and just roll with it and just let it wash over me and then move on to the next scene.
So Sabah's like, well, at some point I'm going to be flying through that place and
I don't want to be imprisoned.
So Sabah is like, well, I mean, he's not shitless on the podcast with you.
Also you have your clothes on.
Okay, I'm about to write a very sternly worded letter to Twitter about this.
And Sarah's like, well, I don't understand.
I mean, why do I have to lose for him to be happy?
Um so Sarah's like, well this is your work Sarah. You don't work with women, you work with men and
women. What will Akeen do if he finds out that you also work with other men who eventually will take
off their shirt because that's really the only way to take a shower, isn't it?
I mean, if you really want to get in there and all the crevices.
I just can't believe this hot guy who really is just all about his body that I met at a bar
in a faraway land turns out to be not such a good person. I can't believe it.
I can't believe an Instagram. Sarah's like, okay.
Sarah's like, he does not believe that men and women can be friends. But aren't you only
friends? Haven't you been saying that for four weeks? I'm so confused. So Sarah's like,
well, this is work. Is he paying your bills? Is he paying your son bills? She's like, no,
then why is he affecting your work and your financial numeration for your hard work?
Please, Akeen, stay away from the numeration.
Yes, yes, he's, listen, why is he affecting
all of your quote unquote work?
What is your work again, by the way?
Because apparently I'm a business partner
and I still don't understand what we actually are doing.
Anyway, that's a different discussion.
Yes, but that's why I'm feeling upset, Sabat.
She's, well, I don't mean to have a go at you.
I just want to call him and I want to shout at him.
You're letting him control you.
You're letting him ruin you.
And I want to say you can only ruin this woman
if you pay her electric bill.
Yeah, it's just stressing me.
And then like I'm away from my work, quote unquote work,
and I'm away from my kid.
And it's just like so much.
It's so much.
Do you know how hard it is to be away from my desk?
That's very dusty because I don't do anything on it. What is Sarah's work again?
What is she? Is she, she's coming out.
She has a product that she's coming to market with.
Is that what it was earlier this season? Girl, nobody knows what Sarah does.
I know that I Googled her one time. There was kind of a deep dive. Yeah.
And she does some kind of seminars where she's like, come out here for $10,000 and we'll,
you know, make you make clear your energy and you can scream into a water fountain until
all of your trauma is gone. And last season she had something.
It's all worth it. So it's like a drive-through car wash for trauma.
Imagine if she just had a car wash. She's like, I have to get back to the car wash.
You know, it's a lot of sand in Dubai. People need their car washes. Trauma wash. They can call it a scar wash.
So now everyone's getting ready. People are decorating and Caroline Stamberry has bought
a whole bunch of penis bottle openers. And she goes, you know, I said, I found a
penis and I found another penis. And you know, in Bali, they worship the penis, you know.
So then she tells us that, by the way, these are wooden penis bottle openers. So Bravo
does not have to blow them out because they're not sex toys. And after getting over the initial
shock of going to Bali and seeing penises everywhere, I then understood that it's something spiritual to them. And it was just so refreshing to see
all these penises after living with a giant pussy named Sergio. So they are meant to bring strength
and money and things like that. They pray to them. So now they start talking about the legality of penises in Dubai.
And Chanel's like, well, I can't take this to Dubai.
It's illegal to have a penis that is not connected to the human body.
And Sarah's like, yeah, oh, if you're on the Dubai airport with these things, they'll be
confiscated and you will be warned.
And Stamber is like, I know a lot of girls who've gotten into trouble, quote unquote
trouble, as you say, but you get taken off and it gets taken away.
That's all.
So funny. Um, so then they're talking about Sarah being, uh, she's still stressed.
Oh yeah. No, they're still talking about dildos. So Stamber is like, Oh yes,
I've known a lot of girls who've gotten into, well not trouble,
I wouldn't say that about Dubai because we never say that about Dubai on this show, but you know,
they weren't celebrated. They were taken off and given stone warning and their penises were taken
away. The amount of dildos they confiscate in the Dubai airport, you have no idea. So Lisa says,
yeah, I got caught coming through with like a little vibrator because I was traveling. So
obviously I need my vibrator when I'm traveling, which then has me questioning what is going
to happen with all these bottle openers.
They just bought them, they're going to leave them behind.
That feels wasteful.
There's some employee at the Dubai airport that's just like, has a dick room at home.
They've just got piles and piles of dicks.
DSA, Dick Security Administration.
Like when weed became legal
and everybody started putting it in their bags
and somebody at LAX or the Texas airport
just has like piles of my weed
that I would take through the airport.
There's someone selling those,
selling those out of Dubai, I guarantee.
Yeah, there's like a black market dildo shop
from the airport.
They're like, wait a minute, I got a dildo from you and I have a peanut allergy.
How did I, my peanut allergy get triggered from that dick?
Oh, it's from the airline.
Isn't it?
God damn it.
Someone had it in their carry on.
They had in their personal item while they're eating snacks.
They're like, they had it on the plane.
They had it in their little
purse. Like, hold on, I'm just going to have some snacks here. These peanuts are delicious.
Let me check on that dildo. Just touched it. Okay, back to my reading.
Well, yeah, because everybody just carries it in their purse, it sounds like. So yeah,
they were rifling through their purse and they probably touched the dildo and then that eventually
went in somebody and God knows what happened. Oh dear. So a palm reader comes in, an energy palm reader comes in. She's gonna read the
energy off their palms. So she enters. She seems very nice. And she does Sarah's reading.
She goes, okay, this year love, not good, only your sadness. Like lots of, oh, I'm seeing this line
says podcast not going to work out. So think about that. Also, be careful with
somebody because they make you sad and angry. Right here, this line, this
wrinkle says great body, great great body, but kind of a dick. So maybe leave that
person. And this one over here says, yeah, podcasts still not working.
This is my favorite psychic ever on Bravo.
Cause she just goes, next year, you're fine.
Business, money and love.
You can do that next year.
This year's a loss.
Yeah, this one, this year's just going to suck the whole thing.
And Sabba goes, Akeen, he has to go.
It's like, how dare you?
Because she just like, Akeen has to go, dump him.
Yeah. The samba's over.
So then, and everyone's wondering where Brooks is, but it turns out she had some cheese because
she was starving and she's lactose intolerant. So she's throwing up in the bathroom. And now
it's time for Chanel's, these are all very generic. It's like, oh, you're very busy and you're confused.
And Chanel's like, oh, that is so true. I am so busy. And I'm often confused. I'm like, oh, you're very, you're very busy and you're confused.
And she knows, oh, that is so true. I am so busy and I'm often confused.
I'm like, wow, wow.
Really, really a very specific, uh, prediction about your life there.
So then Stamber is like, how old are you anywhere?
Let's get back to that storyline.
She's like, shut up.
This woman just made me feel good.
And Lisa's like, well, actually the dentist sent me the records. Dun, dun, dun. So now she tells us that she's
going to share the results tonight. She's so excited. So then we get Talene's reading
and the lady's like, you are smart, you are loyal, and be careful. Don't trust with woman.
She makes you always sadness. And Talene's like, guys, she told me don't trust ever woman.
She makes me sadness.
Guys, did you hear that?
That's what she said.
Makes me sadness.
A woman.
Who could that be?
A woman makes me sad.
Cut to Brooks vomiting again.
She goes, Tony, I was just projectile vomiting.
I need you to make my face look fresh
because today I proved I should not joke around with my lactose intolerance.
I'm glad we keep getting shots of the bathroom door while this lady is just unloading.
So then the reader, she reads Samber's palm and she goes, okay, you're independent and
you're going to have one boy, a baby. And somebody's like, Oh my God, I've got
a boy on ice. I'm not sure I like this at all. And she goes, when is it coming to life? Because
it's in the freezer. So then she's like, Oh God, we've got enough problems tonight. Please don't
ruin my night with thoughts of little baby Sergio's running around saying baby. Baby honey, come on honey honey honey honey.
His first words gonna be honey. I don't even want to tell this to Sergio because then he's going to
be like well now we have to have it he's disgusting why don't marry that fool. So then Lisa's like I
don't Lisa's skeptical but she's like no I mean she does it anyway and And Lisa says, well, now I know that this palm reader
isn't even like, it's a hundred percent fake
because like that baby is not coming, not at all.
So, so Brooks joins.
By the way, praying to idols at a tourist destination,
bad, but psychic, sure, okay.
So it's interesting what's religious and what's not.
So Lisa's reading is, please control your emotion and don't keep something negative in your heart.
And you're very busy and open your heart and open your mind. Okay.
This, these can be fortune cookies. Yeah. I need something more. Yeah.
I need something more. I need,
I need my person to be like you're going to be famous and you're going to get
dick. That's what I have to hear. I don't want to just hear a fabulous.
Oh, the board game you, you supported that you backed on Kickstarter is arriving
on August 23rd.
I need specifics.
Okay.
I'm like, do I need to be home?
Do I need to be home on August?
At least give me a delivery update, you know, like hungry roots on the way, you know, something
purely for tracking status on packages.
What does my mom tell me about my Amazon package?
Something tangible. Do not order the round door knobs.
They are going to be a week late and throw off, throw off everything in a remodel.
Um,
this lady also just keeps on telling everyone to like control their emotions.
She keeps on saying like, and you just like control, everything's good,
but just control the motion, just to control emotions, which is her way of saying,
yeah, I'm staying two villas down
and I can hear you guys at late at night.
I'm trying to get some sleep.
So let's keep it in, keep it in.
I was gonna say, who trained this psychic, the patriarchy?
You ladies don't have emotions.
Please keep your emotions in check.
Yeah, please smile more.
You would be so much prettier
if you just smiled more.
No podcast with shirtless athletes.
You're doing great in your life toots. Wait a minute. Did that psychic just slap me on
the ass?
It's cultural. So now it's time. The sushi is done. It's cute. And now it's time for
dinner and they're going to have Aion's age reveal.
So they bring out a tray of cupcakes and the cupcakes all have candles with numbers on them and she has to guess and
basically what it turns out to be is that
Chanel's age is somewhere between 45 and 50, which means Sam Berry is like, you're 50. The range is 50 to 50.
You're 50 slash 75. Congratulations. You're
older than all of us. Also, while we're complaining about people with jobs on this show, what the
fuck kind of thing is this? You studied my teeth to give me a five year range of five year range.
There's a big difference between 45 and 50. You can't just say between 45 and 50. I need to hear
50. I mean, how many rings are on the tree? God damn it.
Is it like ethical to do something like this and then give the results to a
different person? Like is that?
Yeah. What happened to the doctor patient privilege?
Yeah. So Chanel says that her birth certificate says that she's 42,
but she's like, yeah, I could be 50. So Stamber is like, you're 50.
You're an old hag.
You're dumb and stupid and past your prime.
God, it feels good to be the baby in the group.
And what's her face?
Ayaan's like, I don't care because I know she'll get a facelift before me.
True.
So, and she's right.
Because like two weeks later, Stamberry goes for it.
She goes to town.
So then they're eating and Stambury is just like wasted and she's just like
laughing and foods coming out of her mouth and behind the table, which is great.
She's like, fuck the boarding schools. And Lisa's like, you know, guys,
this holiday has been amazing. And as a friend group,
we've had our ups and our downs,
but there've been more ups than downs and like that made my soul and my heart so happy, even though you're all bitches
for not wearing those dresses.
And listen, I know that this is Sarah now talking.
I know that we're not working it in Applebee's together because I would never,
but I want to say one thing that busboys and waiters say to each other constantly.
And they learned it from upper management, which is this ladies,
we are all family here. And if you have time to lean, you have time to clean. And if your
name is Teline, please don't lean before you clean, Teline. Which actually, God, I love
that. I'm going to go into a poetry contest, a poetry podcast and make about 50K.
It's almost like we're in a neighborhood and we're feeling good.
We're feeling good in the neighborhood. I'm sorry. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. You know what? Here's what we're like as friends.
We can stand together, we can look each other in the eye and we can honestly say to one another,
I want my baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back.
Hold on, a toast. I want my baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back. Hold on, a toast. I want my baby back.
A toast.
Baby?
BK, have it your way.
Wait, please, everybody stop.
Hold the pickles, hold the lettuce.
Special orders.
Don't upset us.
Everyone.
All we ask is actually lettuce.
Have it your way, have it your way, have it your way.
Thank you.
We have the meats.
That was Arby's. That was Arby's.
Just want to clarify.
Hold on. I'm so sorry. Sergio, did Caroline just answer a penis? Be quiet. It's cultural.
Sergio, what is it? What can I do for you? I heard you singing my favorite song and I've been singing you two over here, so I thought I would call you.
What is it, Sergio? I want my baby back, my baby back, my baby back. Give me my baby back. Please, baby, honey, honey, honey, honey.
Well, it's appropriate that you would sing that jingle because chilly is exactly how my vagina feels when I see your face.
because chili is exactly how my vagina feels when I see your face.
Well then good.
It'll be the perfect temperature to put our ice on in.
Please, baby, please.
You've reached my voicemail again.
I wasn't actually talking to you.
Oh, no.
Please leave a message after the beep unless you're you.
No.
Goodbye.
So Brooks is like,
Stabby, if you do not put down that weeder,
I'm gonna drink a cup of milk and poop all over your face.
So then, uh, she's just cracking up with her big penis thing.
And so Leen's like, this trip wasn't perfect.
What trip is?
Am I right?
But I'm just so happy that Brooks and I are okay and we can move forward.
It could not have ended better.
I'm shocked.
I still don't believe it, but guess what?
I was also shocked when Cinderella found a fucking husband from leaving her shoe in a
ball.
I mean, that's crazy, right?
But it happened.
It's history.
So here we are.
Let me tell you something.
If I tried to run away from a ball, they'd catch me within five seconds, but only because
I would have attached a parachute to my back.
So gotta get your exercise in anywhere, even if it's after midnight. I mean, Cinderella really, if I had been running a gym in this country when
Cinderella was around, she never ever would have had that story.
It would have just been girl tries to run, man catches her, man gets some
parachute residue on his face. Boom. The end here. I found your shoe.
Go ahead and go home.
Do they make toe shoes and glass? Just wondering.
I mean, I think it's a good question.
I mean, I think it's a good question.
I think it's a good question. I think it's a good question. I think it's a good question. Man gets some parachute residue on his face. Boom, the end. Here I found your shoe. Go ahead and go home.
Do they make toe shoes in glass?
Just wondering.
Ha ha ha ha.
So then Brooks is like, hey, I'm gonna pair you up.
Let's go have a good time.
So she's made a party outside,
and there's DJ lighting, and everybody starts dancing.
And Brooks is talking about how happy she is that she came.
I never thought by the end of the trip, I'd be toasting with penises,
we'll step right to leave, but here we are. Here we are with you.
We're having a good time.
And they're all waxing poetic Chanel saying, no, we are sisters for life.
We argue, we go dirty, we drag each other with love. And Lisa's like, well,
you know, even though I, and I had the worst part we ever had, we're moving on,
you know, I've forgiven, but not forgotten. Everyone's like just being like, but we're
sisters, we're sisters. And then Caroline's like, well, I definitely let my hair down on this trip
and I couldn't behave this way if Sergio had been beside me, he would have dragged me home by my
head. He's pathetic. I hate him. I never want to see his face ever again. Like I like that. That's
her takeaway. How much she hates Sergio. Everyone else is like, we're sisters, oh my God, we bonded so much, we're amazing,
guys, I love you, I love you. And it just, the little circles closing on Caroline's face like,
I hope that Sergio dies while I'm away.
Who wants to burn this poster of Sergio? In sisterhood.
Sergio's grass. You know, one thing that I've come to on this trip is I've really started to think about
ways that I could truly find happiness.
And I've decided I'm going to go home and start nagging Sergio and calling him fat,
seeing if I can get him to go on a diet for no reason.
God, that sounds fun.
Throw small queer legs at his face.
Just because.
Well, I hope that you're prepared for him to have terrible patterns all over his face.
What are you talking about?
I'm sorry, I thought you said you were going to throw some gay legs at his face.
Hi.
Padma Lakshmi, get out of here.
Get out of my goddamn show.
Hi, I'm here on the vacation too. Surprise,
it's me, television's Padma Lakshmi here to promote my latest special called,
What's the Deal with Poor People? Am I right? Wait, I have a question. Do we ever talk about
this Padma? Do you ever see the clip of Padma doing standup like from last month?
No, I saw that she did it, but I didn't know there was a clip of it. This is literally what it was.
She had it like on her own Instagram. her own Instagram. The caption was like,
Dear comedic people of New York City, thank you so much for allowing me to express myself
and follow my face. Haha, doing standup. Here it is. And so it's her saying, well, I have
a daughter. She's going to be a teenager.
I'm about to hit menopause.
Here are the differences between going into menopause and about to being a teenager.
I have hot flashes.
She loves boys.
I'm like, wow, I'm getting old.
She's like, mom, you're getting old.
Thank you so much for coming to my comedy routine. She has TikTok and I just, I have a watch that goes TikTok.
It's crazy.
She just bought a binder
and I have many very famous friends.
The differences are astounding.
She's against bullying and I'm pro-gay.
Wait a minute.
She loves doing that viral TikTok dance to Apple.
And I'm like, why are you doing a tribute to Gail's body?
She loves Harry Styles and Gail has no styles.
She is young and beautiful and Gail's Gail.
I don't know, I'm running out of content here.
Is there a red light? Is there a red light?
Oh no, I'm sorry.
The only red light going off right now
is the stoplight at the dress bar
and trying to get Gail from buying another dress.
You know what's funny about menopause?
It features a word that Gail never applies for eating, pause.
I've never seen more men pause than at bars that Gale's sitting at. You know what's funny about a hot flash? It perfectly describes how long food lasts in Gale's
presence. It's a hot flash. Wow. I'm starting to sweat in here for no reason.
Did someone just bring a tray of meat in front of Gail?
Gail's been so mean to me ever since I started entering Menopause,
it must be because I have no more eggs for her.
I wanted to have another baby, but Gail ate all my eggs.
I'm going through menopause.
Gail's just swimming through mashed potatoes again.
All right.
Well that brings us to the end of Real Housewives of Dubai.
It's been a great time guys.
We'll be back for another podcast any second now, like literally within the next five minutes.
Well, we're about to do-
We sure love you guys. any second now, like literally within the next five minutes. Well, we're about to do a bonus episode where we do a trailer trash of the new Roni trailer.
So that's true.
We all stick around for that.
Okay.
Yeah, we'll be back with that.
Talk about the new season of Real Housewives of New York City.
Until then, we will talk to you guys next time.
Bye.
Bye. Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee Ferry. Jamie? She has no less name-y. Hava Nagila Webber. Know your worth with Jason Kurtz.
Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch. She's always supplying.
It's Kelly Ryan. Kristen the Piston Anderson.
Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino.
We wanna hang with Liz Lang.
Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg.
The Bay Area Betches, Betches!
And our super premium sponsors!
Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD!
We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva!
Let's get real with Kaitlin O'Neal!
Don't get salty with Christine Pepper!
Can't have a meal without the Emily sides!
Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall!
We got our wish, it's Jen Plish.
She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch.
She's a little bit loony, Junie.
My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo.
We love him madly, it's Kyle Podchadley.
Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender,
the incredible, edible Matthew sisters.
Give him hell, Miss Noelle.
Ring that bell, pour Rachel!
She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke!
Shinin' out of a cannon, Anthony!
Let's take off with Tamla Plain!
She ain't no shrinkin' Violet Coutar!
We love you guys!
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I'm Dan Tuberski. In 2011, something strange began to happen at the high school in Leroy, New York.
I was like at my locker and she came up to me and she was like stuttering super bad. I'm like, stop f***ing around.
She's like, I can't.
A mystery illness, bizarre symptoms, and spreading fast.
It's like doubling and tripling and it's all these girls.
With a diagnosis the state tried to keep on the down low.
Everybody thought I was holding something back.
Well you were holding something back intentionally.
Yeah, yeah, well, yeah.
No, it's hysteria.
It's all in your head. It's not physical.
You're, oh my gosh, you're exaggerating.
Is this the largest mass hysteria since The Witches of Salem?
Or is it something else entirely?
Something's wrong here. Something's not right.
Leeroy was the new dateline and everyone was trying to solve the murder.
A new limited series from Wondery and Pineapple Street Studios.
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