Watch What Crappens - #2595 RHOP 0903: Coming for Bunions

Episode Date: October 21, 2024

The Real Housewives of Potomac settle in for a solid season with the newbie introducing her sexless lovah to us and Ashley getting her bunyons stopped from taking a step over the line. To watch this recap on video, listen to all of our bonus episodes, and join in our new community chat, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to watcha crappin' ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Kill List is a true story of how I ended up in a race against time to warn those who lives were in danger. Follow Kill List wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Kill List and more exhibit-see true crumb shows like morbid early and ad free right now by joining Wondry Plus. Oh hello, welcome to Watch What Crappins, a podcast for all that crap we love to talk about on Ye Olde Bros.

I'm Ronnie. That's Ben over there. How are you, sweet guy? What's going on with your coony? I'm great, thanks. What's going on with you? Well, we're starting Monday with Bueller licking his, well, it's not his wiener. It's his back leg, but Bueller is giving a nice lick back there.

It's just getting himself ready for the week. Hey everybody. I just want you to stop it in your day on this Monday, this fine Monday, just lick yourself, just lick yourself, find a part of yourself that you can reach and just lick it. Okay. Lick it and reach all the way down there. your wiener or your whatever your your inside wiener for you gotta like it Whatever it is Let's get this Monday started right tonight is crappy hour of 530 Pacific time that's always super fun with our special guest Sarahzier, who I've never met in my life until tonight.

So who knows? Maybe we'll be best friends. Maybe we'll be enemies. Time will tell. Maybe we'll be lovers. Maybe we'll be lovers. Yes, that's on our YouTube channel. It is simulcast on Instagram, but we have now moved it basically to live like all the interactivity is on YouTube. So if you want to join in, what's fun about crappy hour is that we bring people up on camera and we talk with them.

So if you want to be part of that, come join us over on our YouTube. And I just think that is how to do it. Also if you're like, where's the YouTube, where's the Instagram, where is all this gosh, darn technology. It's all centered on our website, watchitcrappens.com. And it's also centered on our Patreon. So if you go to Patreon, it's a free post. So just, you'll see it there.

Everyone can see it. You don't have to pay anything. Anybody can go over there and see the crappy hour post. So that's tonight. Super fun times ahead. Great week ahead. We just finished the secret lives of Mormon wives. The final

recap went up this morning. Oh, sadness. Super excited because that was a journey. I mean, we had a really good time, but it's always nice to finish something. You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, it was nice. So we did that. So yay us, Ben. Like seriously. Yay us. Yay us. Another season down. So we did that and now we're on to the rest of the week.

This is on video as usual, available on Patreon. I will stop talking shit now. Let's get on with it. Real Housewives of Potomac, season nine, episode three. It's called Mama Knows Best. Why was it called that? Oh, I don't know. That was like, that was clearly a situation. Because we had a scene with her mom? I think so. They were, they didn't really know what to do, I think. They didn't know what to call it. This is sort of like a transitional episode.

I mean, I thought it was a very funny episode, but story-wise, not a lot happened. So they're just sort of setting us up for this trip to North Carolina. So it was a good episode. Yeah, it was good. I called that episode Virgins and Bunions, something like that. So yeah, I couldn't think of a title either. Yeah, I think they should have called it something, yeah, Bunion, like Bunion, like...

I was gonna call it Bunion Canyon, but it's not in California. Yeah, that's a very specific, that's a real inside baseball pun for Angelenos. But maybe you have like... Yeah, Bunion in the canyon, but... Is there some, is there? No, Bunion in the oven, but there's no pregnant people, right? Is there something that rhymes with Paul, like Paul Bunyan? Well, Ashley is a Paul Bunyan, you know, because her ass will start drama, but I thought that was a little too far out there.

Paula Bunyan or something. Anyway, it doesn't matter. It's done. I'm changing it. Okay. So let's go to the taglines. It's the first time we get taglines. Let's go for it.

There's like a new animation and everything. Yes. Cherry blossoms are flying all around us and we're new. Robin's not here, so we're happier now. We're so much happier now in this opening. It was so impressive to see that they finally got a budget for their opening credits. I mean, I remember, you know, for years they just would sort of stand there and they had like two kind of like Doric columns on the sides. I think that was like to connote the fact that they were near DC, but it was a very like plain background with two columns and maybe like a

cherry blossom somewhere in the midst. But now it's like a full on AI rendering. I mean, it feels like they went into CapCut and loaded up a filter and some animations and some effects and they're a little more credit than that. They definitely looks like there is some sort of like social media filter. Um, like, do you want like a cherry blossom border for your memories here? Use this filter and um, they are swirling around. So we start with

Giselle who says, when the girls are away, it's time for Giselle to play. Like, wow, that's all right. Another tagline about your daughters, do something for fuck's sake, just do something. Your whole life doesn't have to be about your damn kids. Okay? Everybody, that's for all of you. Okay? Here's what you tell your kids. Hi, leave me alone. Please. That's the best advice you can ever give a child. Then they won't rely on you for everything. Okay? Just say, go away. That's simpler. Go away. Tell them. Also, no visual evidence of Gisele playing. And also, no visual evidence of her kids being away. Um, at least in this episode.

So we're going to wait for this tagline to actually be relevant to the show. And she's also calling herself kind of a mouse, which is weird because no one wants to be a rat. I guess rats are different than mice, but still she is calling herself a mouse. Yeah. So then is Wendy and she's like, I quit grading, but I'm still passing judgments. I like that. That's good. That's a good, I like that. Yeah. Although I'm still mad at her for quitting. Isn't that weird?

I know. I don't. Yeah, I also don't think she should have quit. But I like that she is honest about passing judgment, because so many people like I don't judge. I do not judge. It's like, no, you judge. She's right. I like that. She's like that. I love the judge. Mia has says the following marriage can be temporary, but ink is permanent. Um, that's hilarious because we all can tell this is definitely not a permanent

situation. It already wasn't permanent before, cause you guys already had to have relationship that didn't work out. This relationship is built on non-permanence. That's the point of the relationship. You have an eraser mate pen with you, ma'am. It's not permanent. It's ink and ink is not permanent. It's just not.

I mean, Sharpie or, you know, but also INC just dissolve it. You know what I mean? So Ashley is like, from kiddie pulls to the dating pool. I'm ready to dive in. Dive into divorce court. I'm not going to need to dive in to fucking dating. Okay, miss, I'm ready to date. We've done this for three years with you. Divorce golem and then we can talk about you getting some extra dick. I can't believe they gave Ashley an extra show about dating when she's not divorced.

Like, come on. Also, by the way, the number one pool you should never dive into, a kiddie pool. Like, enjoy your neck injury. Yeah. From kiddie pools to the dating pool, I'm ready to dive in. Hopefully, I'll injure less children this time.

That was awkward. I know. Ma'am, do not dive into that ankle deep pool. God, what else? We cut that tagline down. Let's just cut out the public apology to those people's children. From pits of open flame to bats of acid,

I'm ready to dive in. Ma'am, that's not helpful. Pushing people off of cliffs to throwing people out of planes. I harm children. Wait a minute. Okay. Now we're just in horrible, horrible child abuse. From six lane highways to airline tarmacs. I'm ready to dive in. No, that's not gonna be good for you Okay, I Love the kiddie pool. God when I was a kid, I was I remember being so sad when I had to graduate out the kiddie pool

I loved just walking into that knee-deep water and just walk around in circles. It was just the best You didn't have to do any effort but you got this Oh, yeah, all the you got all the perks of swimming without any of the danger. It was, Oh yeah. Talk about being a big fish in a little pond. Cause I was a real fat little kid, chunky little kid. And, um, I would get in that kiddie pool. I'd slosh all of the water out and I'd get out and all the other kids were like, Hey, where'd the water go? And I was like, that's it. Suck it bitches.

And then I, your agent of chaos in the kiddie pool. I was like, fuck you and your kiddie pool. Nate talking to me, there goes your water. Sorry. And then my mom told me that thing's full of pee and in my mind I was like, yeah, cause I peed in it. But then I thought about it and I was like, you know what? My pee is okay. Other people's pee is not okay. And so I stopped going in the kiddie pool and started being in the adult pool

because there's more room for it to spread around. There is more. And that's when I learned to swim. Ding. Avoid the floating pee. Stacy says, I know how to host a show and to steal one too. Oh, look at Stacy coming in thinking she's gonna steal the show.

I love that. And then we have Kierna. Oh, it's your turn for Kierna. Kierna is like, I own a business. I mind my business and I stand on business business, business, business. And I just bought a copy of big business. There's a lot of business here. What does Kierna do again?

Oh, she owns salons. Is it like a spa or a salon or something like that? Kierna. Gosh, she's so beautiful. Her cheekbones are insane. I mean, everyone on this show is beautiful. I think you have to be beautiful on this show. It's not like a Walmart.

They just let everybody in. The greeter just stops you. Sorry, go back out to your beautiful. Like, wait a minute. They're all beautiful, but she is just, I mean, the whole package, this girl. So then we go to Karen and Karen's like, oh, this is you. Karen's like, darling, I am the fence and the gatekeeper. I have a fence and a gate. Two levels of security around my compound. Well, I'm glad you have a fence because how many of you knocked down in the past couple of months? I know. I can't believe they would give Karen another fence thing after she just ran over a tree. Okay. Yeah. I'm also surprised they're leaning into this fence

thing. I mean, that was probably the highlight of last season was her tagline that made no sense. I don't ride the fence. I am the fence. Like that is still one of the most bizarre house, housewife taglines. The fact that they come back to it this season is pretty amazing. Yeah. So let's go to the Giselle kicking the ladies out of the GNA event. the Giselle kicking the ladies out of the GNA event. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun. And everyone's like, Oh, my God. Stacey's like, Ashley, did you not tell us to be here by eight o'clock?

Well, it is eight o'clock. Are we not here? It is eight o'clock. This is me stealing a show, everybody. We're having a time fight. And Ash is like, Well, actually it's eight oh four. So no. At which point I would have been like, it was eight o'clock when we walked in the building. It took you four minutes to get over here. That's not our fault. I'm up the stairs because nobody can have an event without five flights of stairs in this town. Okay.

Exactly. So Giselle is like, my father passed away months ago and Karen's getting an award. Who gives a shit? It's the same woman who had just hit a tree. This is a real event, which we are raising real money. Don't play with me. Not tonight. And she's like, hoes, don't be listening. So then Mia and Stacy are walking down the stairs. They're like, bitch. Stacy says, I have never been so offended in my entire life. I was like, well, lucky you. Shit. I've been that offended like four times today life. I was like, well, lucky you. Shit, I've been that offended like four times today already. It's only 10 30 here.

This is nothing, Stacey. You just started on Potomac. It's going to get a lot worse from here on out. My day started by my dog looking me in the eye and then pooping. That's how it started. Do you think that's respectful? No, I'm offended.

Where's my trip home, my free ride home, people to feel bad for me. Most of the time you've been in your life, get the fuck out of here with that. I feel like someone really offended me this weekend, but I don't remember what it was. So I'm going to wait for it to, to waft over me. And I'll make it all because you went to see Joni Mitchell. I did see, Ooh, I did see Joni Mitchell. She did not offend me,

but it was probably someone at the concert. You know, I will say, by the way, if you want to talk about a respectful audience, the Joni Mitchell concert, just people sit, you know, you would have loved it, Ronnie. Everyone sits and it's quiet and you just listen and like so little talking. Oh girl, I always love Adele, you know? Yeah, it was, it was great. Yeah, no, I'm trying to think. There was probably someone at the Joni Mitchell concert who offended me and I'm gonna have to make that up. Sitting loudly, probably creaking back and forth

in their bench at the bowl. Was it at the bowl? Oh, I'll tell you who offended, it was at the bowl. Okay, there was a lady in our row who, she got drunk and there was an intermission and the intermission is 15 minutes long. And just as the lights go down, she stands up and is like, sorry, gotta go to the bathroom. Should have gone before.

Should have gone before you had an entire intermission. And now we're doing the whole thing where you stand up and squeeze by as Joni Mitchell's coming on stage and everything. That was offensive to me. What an asshole. Yeah. Okay. So, um, let's see. Um, so Ash is like, wait a minute, girls, wait a minute, wait a minute. And Stacey's like, quite frankly, I am embarrassed. I am offended. And I stand on business. Sorry. Wrong line of someone else's line. It sticks in my head. I stand on business. I leave on business.

I'm so offended by business. Why am I saying that? Mia's like, it's very tasteless and I don't do tasteless. I don't do glassless either. I'm like, yes, I'm sure. Yes, Mia. Absolutely. You met your husband at the steak and lobster strip club. Can we stop this? Wearing a ball gown. It was classy. Don't forget it was a ball gown strip club. Okay. You were literally married to Gordon

who first met Karen and was like, hey, let's please not talk about how tasteless you are. No, he said, excuse me. He was classy about it. So Jassy is telling Ashley, um, excuse me. We were at 20, oh three military time and that's eight Oh three, three minutes behind your ass. I love the Jassy pulling out military time. She's like, um, my husband is in sports, which makes me have the right to use military time right now.

I'm speaking military time slash European time. So she's like, really sending your security? Are you crazy? I would have rather not been invited. And then she just walks out. She's like furious. And as she's telling us that like, you know, in my opinion, it's between Gisele and Karen and Karen was born at night, I'm sure a very dark night because there were no streetlights back then. But definitely not last night. So I know damn well, Karen knew what she was doing when she was sent that invitation. So then, Jossie, who's very friendly with her driver, I like that she knows her driver's name. Um, she's like, Fahmy, we're ready.

She's like, Fahmy's like Fahmy guys. Fahmy is like, my name is Stuart. That's okay. Um, but don't ever tell Fahmy to get you at 8 AM or, or don't tell him to get you at 8 PM. He'll always come at eight in the morning. He only does military time. He just wants that those clock numbers to go up. Um, so Giselle, I don't know if you clock this pun intended. Uh, did you notice at this point Giselle's talking with some guests and she was like, well, I shouldn't have invited them. And then the guest is like, well,

you should take the barcode, take it outside. You want support. There you go. Did you see who that guest was? I sure did the awful gay from below deck. That's right. Because we know he's from the Baltimore area because we're Maryland. We know he's from Maryland. Cause that was featured on below deck. And I was just waiting for him to show up on this show. He's probably already been on the show many times. And I was like, Oh, there he is again. Yeah. Deck gay.

Warming his way in. Of course, anything that shoots around there, you know, he's a warming his way in and being like, Hey that shoots around there, you know, he's warming his way in and being like, Oh my God, I've got a line. You got a barcode, do it outside. You stick it outside. Give him a barcode. I was like, oh, this fucking guy. Surprised he wasn't still in a speedo jumping out, jumping into a pool. How could you say that when I'm nice to black people?

I think he said something like that. His best friends were black and he's like, why would you let your husband's talk to me like that? I'm gay and I'm nice to black people. I mean, he had so many different awful episodes. He was swimming late at night. Swimming. Yeah. The swimming jumping in the water.

There was a fight with a girl when they broke the glass or something like that. Yeah. It was like, Chris, you're awful. This was actually his best one though. Get a barcode and take it outside because that was, that idea was actually pretty funny. Yeah. So, uh, he's like, yeah, take a barcode so they can still donate before they leave. I mean, listen, maybe he redeemed himself for me because that shit was funny.

So the ladies are now in the Sprinter van and Vivian comes out to just say hi to them because Vivian is the true class actor of the show, it turns out. So she comes over to say hi and she's like, this is crazy. And Stacey's like, I am literally shaking. And I'm like, no, that's just the way Fahmy drives. But then Ashley comes out with the guy, whatever his name is, his name Brandon or something. She, she comes out with him and she's got the thing and she's like, um, yeah,

so sorry everyone. I know we kicked you guys out, but if you would like to, you know, donate though, we like, here's a pan of yours. Here's a QR code for you to donate. And they're like, fuck you. And I like, Jesse goes, no, no Fahmy, can you get her out? She's going to make the driver kick her out. Fahmy, please. Fahmy's like, I'm in a totally different compartment. And Ashley goes, but this is the QR code for the brain tumor society. And she's like, holding the barcode in there. And then Fahmy just pushes the door like, this starts cloning. It starts closing on Ashley and she's like, wait a minute, that's harassment.

Really? Gollum lover? How many times did you stick up for the ask grabber over there? You don't get to even use that word for something like this, ma'am. By the way, you cannot actively walk out of a building to go to some people in their own thing in a vehicle, try to make them pay money for something. And then when they close the door and you say that they're the ones harassing you, you actively moved over to them. You're the harasser. That shit was funny though.

And so Ashley's like, but do you want me to leave you the QR code? And Jesse goes, go to bed. You got bags. Bye. And Stacey, of course, is so funny. I'm really loving that we're seeing Stacey's flummox side. Like I think this is going to be her character is that like when she's upset, she's like, she's like, oh my God, I mean, what kind of businesswoman walks in? And he's like, well, not one that I wanna do business with.

Yeah, her personality is very offended, which I think is very funny. We need that, because that's what this show is, you know? This show is built on that. Just, oh, really? You're taking my middle seat for my birthday? It's not really, it's what I saw her playing on my great five seven.

Stacey is really giving Fussy indignation and I love it. Yeah, and she's already pulled the errand. I've never been so offended in my entire life. Never in my life. I love when people say shit like that. I know, it's great. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappins commercial.

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DC is necessarily known for the class. Okay. Let's take a look at our politicians and we'll that much anymore, but that's fine. Maybe have some classism, but I don't think DC is necessarily known for the class, okay? Let's take a look at our politicians. We'll see what these folks are up to. January 6th. So Mia's like, fuck her, I don't wanna do coffee and tea, I don't wanna decorate her tacky ass house, I don't wanna do shit with her, okay?

Damn Willy Wonka ass furniture. I was like, nasty woman. I was like, Willy Wonka's furniture. I was like, I was like, Willy Wonka's furniture. Did she just cross over to Maryam Cosby's land? I don't know what's happening. So now we get, uh, that's over. So now we get little snippets of everybody at home. Wendy and, um, her family are, are doing a drip check. Yeah.

What's the drip check? Let's like your clothes, like, like, like cool. It's cool and everything. It's her sons are like now at that age where they look like little teenagers, but they still speak like little boys. And it's like weird. And then, uh, Yeah, they're little men now. I didn't know what that drip check was. Well, I don't know what a drip check is, but I've heard of drip before. So I just assumed she was checking to make sure their drip looked good. But also she's raising very expensive children, which is not good because he's like, okay,

well this shirt was $500 and these pants were $800. You know, he's and I think they were kidding, but they're pricing all their stuff really high. I'm like, yeah, I don't know. Also, there was a leak in the ceiling. There was a leak in the ceiling. There was a leak in the ceiling that they had to put a bucket under. They're like, drip check. Oh, that's a drip check.

No, I'm just joking. What are you telling me? I'm just joking. Were they really doing that? No. No. God damn it. I was making a pun.

I'm such a wide old queen. I can't take. A drip check is slang term used to describe when someone with a cool, trendy or sexy sense of style shows off their outfit. For example, hey, my dude, you have some serious drip. Drip check. You were getting close to Ramona Singer voice with that, hey, my dude, you have some serious drip. Drip check. My drip looks young, your drip looks old. You're drip flex, y'all. And then we go to Kierna and her boyfriend talking about his work. And I forgot the scene.

Here's the thing. I love Kierna. I think Kierna is really beautiful. And I think I love her like sarcasm. And I think she seems to have a good sense of humor. I never remember a damn scene she's in. All I remember is the diarrhea scene. There's something missing with this one. There's something with Kierna that's like, there is like a stickiness issue. Like she

is very beautiful, but I feel like we just keep coming back to that because we don't really know what else to say about her. I feel like there's a lot of scenes that take place in that brown kitchen of hers with the blue walls. And I'm just like, I'm like, okay, but, but she's pretty. What else? Yeah. So I feel like every time I see Kyra and I just think, what else? But what else? And I don't know what it is yet. Maybe it'll come out this season, but I'm also, I find it so offensive to keep saying, oh my God, but she's so pretty. I just, okay, let's talk about something else about her. But I'm the one who does it, you know? I love that she has so many vowels in her name. It's like a lot of vowels. That's K-E-I-A-R-N-A.

It's a lot. Like her name starts with a K because that's like my last name, Karam. Yeah. She's like jewelry because every kiss begins with a K. I love that she has spas because I love some facial work even though I haven't... I visibly haven't done it. By the way, guys, don't stop doing, um, facials and chemical peels and Botox if you're already doing them, because if you don't do them, it's like a gremlin who got hit with water.

You just, your face suddenly just will go very quickly. Yes. Is that why don't you get, why don't you get like stuff out here in LA then? Because I'm assuming you're not doing it. I don't trust anybody because a bunch of fucking shysters. I called this lady and she was like, oh, to see the doctor, it's $500, but then you can use that $500 towards any treatment that you get in the future. I'm like, you don't do a free consultation? And she's like, no, we don't waste the doctor's time. And I was like, you're not wasting my fucking time. You're in line with my time. Wow. The doctor's time. Yeah. I'm like, I'm waiting until I go back to Texas and I'm going to just get, you're not even going to recognize me. We have so much, so many, like we're going

to do the steak treatment. They're just put stakes on your face. the steak treatment, they're just put stakes on your face. Tom, I'm going to come back at Tomahawk. Okay, so, um, stays so they're all talking about the, the, whatever. Yeah. And, um, so Stacy and Jassy are checking in and, uh, Stacy's house and stay, they're asking, like, how are you feeling about it? How are you feeling? She's like, Oh my God, that bothered me. And Stacy's like, why on earth is Giselle walking around with security? Are we supposed to have security with these girls? Yes. Yes.

Actually Giselle always has security. Giselle is always terrified of her cast members on this show. Yeah. So Ashley shows up now and, um, uh, she, she comes in and everything and he states he's like well what a night Ashley and almost say like with the tone of like you're gonna apologize to me right and she's like yeah you know I had a great night and she's like well we did not have a great night did I mention I was horrified by the behavior of everyone there and I've never been thrown out of an event before in my life.

And Jassy's like, uh, GMA gangsters and alcohol. Uh, you guys said you're going to kick us out like the gangsters you are. And she's like, um, wait a minute, drip check. She's like, gangsters and alcohol. And Stacy says, well, that's how you act. So then- Like gangsters with alcohol. I've never been so gangsterized in my entire life, you gangster giver.

You alcohol having gangster. So Karen shows up, Karen rings the doorbell and Jassy's like, well, Ashley, I do want to say, I do want to genuinely say that although you were not welcome in my sprinter, I am sorry that the door closed on you. And she goes, yeah, I'm a little sore today. Actually, Jassy just, well, you're not because I reenacted it. And I was glad to know that it actually closes quite softly. and I was glad to know that it actually closes quite softly. Let the jazzy read act today. What's?

She's like, Fahmy, close the door on me. Fahmy, stop being nervous. Fahmy, stop crying. What? Fahmy, you can do this, Fahmy. You're not going to hurt me, okay? It's okay, Fahmy. It's okay, Fahmy. You can press the button. I'll be fine. Ow, Fahmy! Why did you do that, Fahmy? Fahmy's like, at 20 2023, I closed the door on her. That's writing in the diary. This military time. I love that Jassy's doing like her own version

of cereal. She's like, and so I went and decided to try out how hard does that door close after all? And then I went to the Best Buy and there's no way that he could have gotten there. And then I went to the Best Buy and there's no way that he could have gotten there. Did the door close softly or strongly? So she's like, I reenacted it. You're fine. And she's, but you didn't know that initially when you pushed the button. But she has had some familiarity with vehicles, I'm sure, that have automatic closing doors and we all know they do not close like guillotines. Yeah.

So Karen comes in and she's like, your dog, your dog is all over me. Why is your dog licking me? It's licking me. It's all over. Dogs love me. Yeah, because, because, yeah, she, wait, no, is this, yeah, this is when the dog comes and this is when the dog kisses her around the mouth. Yes. The dog kisses her on the mouth, which is funny.

Cause she's like appalled, right? You know, she's thinking like who has a dog in someone's face when you walk in a door, she's like, Oh, Oh, I'm married to the black Bill Gates. How could this dog kiss me? And they're still talking about the door in the other room and now she's like you tried to close the door and it and it Opened thankfully not that you knew it would you could have murdered me. It's like Ashley. I knew it would open Oh, and that kind of stuff is really rude Ashley doing her best to change the conversation To how he was rude the night before she was almost, like her arm was almost severed by this door. And Karen goes, what the fuck is going on?

So she's like, well, I have a question for you. Giselle said she talked to you Wednesday and you told Giselle, I'm not inviting the other ladies because I don't want to conflict with the group. Right. I think I probably said that before I realize I've lost both of my parents. Why shouldn't I have my friends cheer me on when I'm receiving the Oscar award for my wonderful work in my Lidam commercial? Why? And then Ash is like, but then at like 6 30 on Thursday morning, you send out that group chat. And we see the chat again where, you know, Karen tells everyone, you know, like, oh yeah, you can come to both.

So and then Giselle's response of like, don't come to mine, just go to Karen's. So Karen's like, well, I certainly did. This is a very prestigious moment in my life, receiving the CVS award for longest receipt. It was very important for me. It was me. There was also a woman being honored who had eaten the most mayonnaise in the tri-state DMV area for years. I made very prestigious. Huge, huge.

And Ash is like, yeah, but like when I asked what the award was last week, you couldn't even tell me what the award was. And that's not true. It was the award for greatest fence gate person, hybrid human. So then she's like, well, I was at an Inquisition birthday party last week, so let's be clear. All right. And she's like, no. And Stacy goes, oh my God, she literally has answered all of your questions. Stop questioning Karen. This is the most offensive thing I've been around in my entire life. It was a nice little deflection and that's fine. And Karen's like, well, I know you are not sitting here trying to tell me that I'm deflecting. I'm sorry. When Michael was pinching asses one, two, and three, oh, I can't answer that. That was you.

We see flashbacks to that. And they just are so ready. They have always have something in the back pocket that they're like, oh, yeah, I remember that thing from four seasons ago. But like, I'm not I'm also not saying that Karen shouldn't have said it like Karen absolutely should have said it. It's just so funny how they're always ready with the ammo. Yes. And then Karen's like, well, I am in a case currently, Ashley, where I could have died. I could have died, Ashley. Or taken the life of someone else, yes. I love Karen. I could have died drunk driving. You guys really worried for me.

I was almost hit by a drunk driver. That was me. It's like, I was hit myself. Have you ever tried to take out one of your contacts while you were driving drunk? Very difficult. I hit myself right in the cheek. So I care of Ashley just quietly adding or you could have killed someone else. By the way, you're not the victim here.

So Karen's like, well, I'm grateful that no one else got hurt and let me dust off one of them, an oldie but goodie. Let me be very clear. I knew when you gave me those four Uber seats that you were being shady as fuck. And you see, back to the birthday, something we hadn't seen before, which is that Ashley gave her four gift cards for Uber.

Oh yeah, it was on last week. She gave her Uber cards, yeah. I missed it. It's just so casual because this show, they're so shady. Oh yeah, it was on last week. Oh what? She gave her Uber cards, yeah. I missed it. It's just so casual because this show they're so shady. Oh no, yeah, that's right. Then she was just like, okay, well here's your flowers and her Uber cards.

Right? So Karen's like, well, you were shady and I should have given them back to you so you could get a consultation to get that human being of a fucking acorn off your foot. I was like, I don't even understand what she's talking about, but I love it. So you could get a consultation to get that human being of a fucking acorn off your I don't even understand what she's talking about, but I love it. And then we see that she has this big bunion and they like zoom in on the do like one of those like bounce zooms where you just see your foot,

like a little part of her foot goes boom. But then it comes back in and as she puts her foot on the, on the island, are you coming for my bunions? I have two of them. Igor is a human being on your foot. And Stacey's like, and now here comes Ashley's bunions. Where did they come from? Ashley's a beautiful woman from head to ankle. I've never been more offended by the foot. She goes, how about you worry about whether or not

you're getting the jail time, okay? And oh, sorry, that was Ashley says that. Karen's like, oh, Ashley. She's, I didn't wanna go there, but you took me there. She says, Ashley, that is too much. And she's like, oh, really? You think you're gonna come for my bunions and I'm not gonna come for your knees? And she's like, I, really? You think you're going to come for my bunions and I'm not going to come for your, for your knees? And she's like, I said your feet, your feet. And she's

like, okay, well now you're making me laugh. She just starts laughing because those fights are so stupid even for them. So how are we going to move forward guys? Let's forgive each other and blah, blah, blah, blah. And what's, what's up with Gisele? Is she going to apologize? And Ashley's like, well, she's clearly wrong, which I was surprised to hear Ashley say because Ashley was really fighting for Gisele the whole time, you know? Ashley's kind of a fence-sitter too. I think at this point she's like, okay, do I have to have my wagon hitched to Gisele anymore? Because it used to be Gisele and Robin who would team up against me, but now Gisele doesn't have Robin. So am I still stuck with Giselle? Well, I think that, um, Ashley is really avoiding, um, a situation here because she is, she's dodging some heat here because she's sort

of acted like, oh, well, this is Giselle who did this. And, you know, you guys should be mad at her. Like I don't, I don't co-sign it, but the truth is she was a co-host and she could have very easily said, no, Giselle, they're my guests too. And I would like them to stay. They're only three minutes late. I know you're mad. Just don't talk to them. You know, and she just sort of acted like she had no say in this event when it was her event too. So she actually could have done something. But either way, but it's Ashley. So she's like, be mad at Giselle instead. So that's pretty much what's happening. And they're just wondering like, is Giselle like,

Stacey needs Giselle to apologize. And Ash is like, yeah, Gisele doesn't really do that. And she goes, well, the only way I'm gonna be forward is if Gisele is able to apologize. And she's like, okay, good luck with that. Well, we'll be waiting. So now let's go to Wendy's. Her mom, Susan is over. And she's like, it baffles me.

You don't know how to make yam porridge still, Wendy. Come on. She's like, you know, like, and let me tell you something that I left in your freezer that we must use. And she like pulls out this giant, like frozen dried fish. This dog fish is very expensive. And Wendy's like, yeah, but it's really stinky. I'm like, you guys didn't even wrap up that fish. This dogfish is very expensive. And Wendy's like, yeah, but it's really stinky. I'm like, you guys didn't even wrap up that fish. It's just in the freezer just like that.

Shove it in the freezer, you know, move over the move over the dogfish to get to the bento berries. And I like that Susan was like, she's holding this giant fish by the tail. She starts poking at the daughter's face. I forget the daughter's name. The daughter's like, oh, I was poking at the daughter's face. I forget the daughter's name. The daughter's like, uh. So then they start talking about going

on this North Carolina trip and we see a flashback of me inviting them saying, I absolutely have a special place for Lincoln Norman in my heart. It's where I've grown up. It's where I found success. Really? What was that?

Can we call the chamber of commerce in like in Lake Norman and ask them what the fuck Mia did? Cause I'm still not sure. The first ever joint chiropractic in Lake Norman was founded by us. I learned how to properly straighten brochures in doctors offices in Lake Norman. So Wendy is talking about how it's going to be your birthday when they're there

and everything. And it's going to be so fun because of that. And, then Wendy's like, by the way, mom, did I tell you that Eddie's dad called me to wish me a happy mother's day? And Susan's like, Oh wow, the tide is turning. And we find out like we hear more about this issue between like, you know, Eddie has a, has an issue with his parents. And we find out that actually Wendy's mom needs to be friends with Eddie's mom, but then they started to like drift apart.

And then when they got engaged, just sort of exacerbated the whole situation. Yeah. Still doesn't really clue us into anything, but we have just greater context. Yeah. Well, suppose, yeah, now she's going to be, we're going to get to meet the other side, which I'm very interested in because you know, you always, I always want to hear every side of story. You know, I want to hear if Wendy and her mom did anything. Cause Wendy's, his mom's a little troublemaker and she always acts so innocent.

That's a good word for it. Little troublemaker. And Wendy's like, yeah, I was thinking about inviting his parents to my 40th birthday party. And then Susan turns around and it's like, what is Susan going to say? She goes, please do. Like, oh, okay, cool. But then we also find out like, here's the thing, Susan, she is like, oh yeah, you know what? I'm for peace. You know me. I'm like, are you? And then we, I just always feel like there's probably like another side of the story. It's like classic, like self-serving parents saying like, I am always for peace. I never

start anything. And then we also hear the story about how Eddie's mom was at the baptism and that, like, Susan went up to hug her and she was like, Eddie's mom, and she was like, no, thank you. Yeah, she pushed me away, but I told her God will judge you Cracks me up she goes yes invite them let them come I've learned not to give him a hug anymore If she comes to me though, we're gonna have a showdown. I was like, yes, there she is. I'm ready for it Oh, I'm all for peace. Yeah, right. Sometimes the only way through peace is blowing Blowing people up. It's war, okay? It's war. Commercials. Here comes one right now.

So now we go over to Kierna's house. Actually, it's Greg's house, technically, and Kierna's there, and her mom comes over. I literally thought this was her sister. And then when I said her mom, I was shocked. So- Can I tell's something so horrible. And I'm not even lying to you. What I totally forgot to say. I'm not kidding. Well, there is something about Kieran a scenes that I'm like, I don't remember this. You know, literally did this happen? Yeah, I get it because she's pretty soft spoken. Like, I would not say, like, she's just, she hasn't really come out of her shell yet, in my view. And they live in sort of more modest means than the rest of the cast.

So they're just sort of like, it's like sort of visiting TLC land a little bit. And so I feel like it's like, we're like, oh, okay. So like your mind kind of checks out a little, you know. But I feel like, you know, they cast her for a reason. And I feel like, you know, they, they cast her for a reason. And I know that, you know, which her cheekbones are just amazing guys. She just has beautiful cheekbones. What can we say? She was cast for her cheekbones.

Yeah. Um, so yeah, I mean, I don't, you know, I don't need to talk about why it's just like another example where I'm like, I don't remember. I literally just don't remember this. Well, in this case, um, Greg just had a deep root canal. So, um, he's resting in case, in case that does that, does that trigger ready memories, the deep root canal. So, um, she, yeah, she's talking about how she's Karen has never been like a thirsty ring girl, you know, she's just happy to be with Greg and stuff.

So the mom comes over and, but the mom though, seems to be a little bit of a thirsty ring girl and you know, she's just happy to be with Greg and stuff. So the mom comes over and, but the mom though, it seems to be a little bit of a thirsty ring girl and she's basically hectoring Kierna to get a ring. Oh yes. Now I remember I loved her mom. She's like, so when's the ring? She's like, leave me alone about the ring. She's like, be the thirsty ring girl. Yeah, I liked her mom. So then what else is going on here? Let me find out. Well, she also kind of like, Kierna's like, yeah, Greg doesn't really like my eggs. She was like, let me see those eggs. She's like, really? He also doesn't like my pancakes. She's like,

let me see those pancakes. And mom is like, what are you doing wrong? Let me help you. So Michelle's like, just remember, family first. well, God, God first, and then family and then money. Get the money. Mom. So then we go to Giselle and she's with Angel and Adore. They're all getting ready for prom. Well, those girls are getting ready for prom. And Giselle's like, oh my God, it is prom season. I'm like, oh gosh, Giselle, now it's the prom. Could you just teach them to drive at the same time? And what's the other one they usually do with kids on this show? Pack them for college and send them away.

We just condense it all. We've seen this like 10 times this season. I mean, this year alone. It's not fair. We already had prom last season with the older one and like, so now we're having prom again. I'm like a little over it. So Jamal is there. And so they're talking about like, Oh my God. And like, curfew like here's the curfew and Jamal's got a girlfriend and

you know, just all like whatever. He's the father of my daughters that will never change. He's the father of a lot of people's daughters. They the streets, a lot of problems. That's why Jamal looks so bored. He's like father of a lot of people's daughters. They're the streets. A lot of problems. That's why Jamal looks so bored. He's like, this again? Oh my God. It's like my 18th child watching Get Ready for Prom.

Oh my God. Even Cal looks bored and he's normally always smiling. So basically she's just like, I can't believe they're about to go off to college and I'm going to be all alone. You know, something we've never seen before on this network, people musing about their kids moving away. So now we go over to Mia and Inc. They have a staycation rental essentially to get away from Gordon. Yeah, a staycation. And she's like, well, Gordon lives in my building and when Inc's in town to keep the peace we rent an Airbnb

for privacy and no random pop ups for coffee. And that's a little strange. It's a little strange. I don't think it's strange. That man was counting on you to change his diapers and now he's all alone. It's like his nurse just up and quit him and he can't find another one to work for free. He doesn't have any more money. What's he supposed to do?

He's going to show up at your damn house for coffee. Just in case he has a heart attack or a stroke, you're asking to take care of him anyway. Gordon's like, listen, you don't understand. My dream has always been to live out a sitcom premise. And so me living in the same building as you and then popping in for coffee is like literally making me so happy right now. Truly. Yeah. Gordon just comes, the door slams open and Gordon just slides in on his socks. Like, pshh. Coffee?

And they go, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. No. There he is again. Just me, my husband and my ex. Thursdays, I can see. So we're going to meet Jacqueline's on againagain, off-again path, because it's his birthday and we're going to celebrate it because they've been together for 14 years, which is interesting. I mean, I don't know. I guess they don't subtract the years that they've

taken a break or not liked each other. So then we find out that they, Inc and Mia were pretty wildly, oh, Jacqueline is telling us, Okay, she sees Ink and she's like, oh, it's Ink. Hi, Ink. Ink's on camera. I can't believe it. I never thought that Ink was really just here for camera time.

This is absolutely crazy. Wow, Ink. Ink, so good to see you. Yeah, she says that like, like Mia and Ink split up after high school and then Ink was hitting Jaclyn up a lot. And she was like, no, I'm going to stay away. Also, I'm just going to let America know that Inc is messy.

That's what I'm basically doing right now. So Inc was trying to get with Jacqueline or was he just like, I'm lonely. You want to go to the Applebee's? He was trying to fuck Jacqueline. Yeah, let's be honest. It could have been all the above. He wanted to get with her and also go to Applebee's. Everything can be true. That is a massive jug you're drinking out of. Everything can be true. That is a massive jug you're drinking out of.

I ordered it online because I forgot the name of those jugs that we love. I know, but I forgot at the time. So I was just like, go send me a gallon jug. Look at how big this fucking thing is. It's like one of the ones in the office where you turn it upside down onto the little thing. It is enormous. It is like you're taking a silo and drinking from the top of it. So it's so big. It's covering up your face. Okay. So Patrick, Patrick is a PP because cause it's like,

Hey, aren't you called a PPP or something like that, which isn't that like a type of insurance? So that's like a loan that came out during the pandemic that nobody paid back. Isn't it? Mauricio's like, so we took out a few million. We paid some employees. We're not paying back. Probably worth 19 zillion dollars.

19 zillion dollars. Yeah. So, you know, why should I pay that money back? Because I pay enough in taxes. So the tax holders can take it because, you know, why should I pay that money back? Because I pay enough in taxes, so the tax holders can take it. Because you know, I support those people all year, and without me they would have nothing. So suck it, America. Suck it, it's so upsetting.

Yeah. So then Patrick and Ink are left alone while the girls go to the other room. And Ink, Patrick has his kids, and Ink are left alone while the girls go to the other room. And Ink, Patrick has his kids and Ink goes, wow, your princesses look just like you. And he goes, yeah, I tried denying them. Ink is like, you can't. And Patrick goes, you got any kids? And Ink goes like, mm hmm. And then they cut to Jeremiah talking to Mia, which is like shady.

But of course I was like, does he look more like Gordon? Does he look more like ink? I can't tell. He actually looked a lot like Mia to me, so I really couldn't tell. So Jacqueline's like, they're talking about, uh, Gordon and Mia and she's like, girl, when do you want me to start? One day he had me take care of his hang mail and the next day he missed his coffee cup. So he needed his coffee cup. And Patrick's like, well, you gotta say what he's going through. You gotta see what he's going through also. You can't control it. Sometimes,

you just gotta be positive and help him out. Like Patrick, you showed up on this show, business casual, speaking level-headedly. Are you aware that you're on Bravo? Also, Patrick is like so nice and also hilarious. I already love him. He's had one scene and I'm like, love him, marry him, bring him on. Yeah, Patrick is great. He's a catch.

I would marry this guy. Yeah, he's cute. Everything about him is great. He doesn't want to be on camera, which I like. He's like super nervous to be there. You know, he also showed up and he had been rained on. Did you notice his shirt was all wet from the rain? And he was like, whatever. He was like, cool. He was like chill about it. He wasn't like, Oh my God, I'm rained on.

I like, I wish he was like, Oh my God, I got rained on. Can I take off my shirt and you guys can drive for me? That would have been hot. Yeah. So Mia's like, going being in the same building is definitely beneficial for the children and like my dad not being in my life as an adolescent was a disaster. And so we get all of that. So she's just saying it's really important for her kids to have a positive father influence in their life.

And also some question about who their father is. Yeah. She's like, I just didn't want it to be a disaster, which is why I told the father of his children that the child was fathered by somebody else. So then Stacey is at Sweat DC with Gerard, her personal trainer. And now we meet her special friend. Brick capper Jessica May wrote her special friend. Her special friend TJ. So Stacy tells us,

the closer I started to get toward my divorce, I've started to allow myself to even think about the possibility of a romantic relationship with TJ. I don't know, it just started to feel different. And then I knew something was happening, something special, something special and not touchingly. It's great. I'm so happy. I love this. I love this situation. So they're doing a ball workout or whatever. And, um, it's,

you know, those ball lifting things. I don't understand. I'm so weird. And then, um, she goes, speaking of balls and he goes, Oh, listen, I'm not sleeping with you. I'm not going to do that. He's like super charming, super worked out, super fit, super cute. So I don't trust him at all. I don't know that smile. I don't trust that smile. Well, also I thought it was, I thought it was funny that like when he, when he sort of lumbered in, he's like, Hey, he goes and he sort of like touches her by the, by the elbows like, Hey honey, it doesn't say honey. He's like, Hey,

and then he goes up to Gerard and does like a full on like embrace arms all around, but then like, we'll barely touch her. I was like, you know, I think you need to switch your priorities and like you guys don't have to have sex, but you can at least like hug. That's okay too. Well, I'll go a step further and point out that she also has great chemistry with Gerard, the trainer. And I'm wondering if they're with Gerard as some sort of a third.

And I don't mean that they're having sex with him. I just mean like energy wise, maybe he's like the secret to their relationship. The secret sauce. Like they fall in love while they were working out because they both want Gerard. I can tell you that, right? Well, let me tell you something. I have no idea of the man's sexuality. I'm not saying he's gay or anything like that. So I think just because he's like virginal does not make him gay. I don't necessarily

think he's gay, but I do see chemistry with both of them and trainer. So maybe there's a little higher curiosity or something because there's something going on. I would love if they had like a little throuple together. I don't know what Gerard's sexuality is, but I do know his booty was his booty was out there. And I was like, wow, that's a booty. That was amazing. That was, that was, I was like, I feel like it deserved actually a little bit more attention because it was like Gerard was doing great work. I don't know much about Gerard or what's going on with him. I know that his smile is too charming and that he's walked up a lot of hills in

his life or a lot of stairs. I know you could put like a coffee cup on that thing. It was out there. It was, it was a big round. Um, either way, I'm going to take a picture of it and then I'm going to go to Kinko's and have them blow up a poster. Gerard, the breakout hit of the episode, um, between Gerard and that Bunyan, you know, this was like a big episode for protruding, protruding objects episode for sure.

episode for protruding. Yeah, the body parts episode for sure. So anyway, 2J is basically like, you know, Stacy's like, so like how much do you want to sleep with me? And he goes on a scale of one to 10, the letter K. So in my mind, I'm thinking, oh, that means it's like you're past the numbers. So you have to get into letters. And she goes, what does that mean? He goes, zero.

I was like, oh, I didn't think, okay. This isn't great. This is a bad start. This is a bad start for sure. At least humor her and say it means, oh, I can't wait to sleep with you. Like don't say like, I literally have no interest in sleeping with you.

So she's like, well, he's not a virgin. He's had intimacy with other partners. He just doesn't wanna be intimate with a woman unless she's like, well, he's not a virgin. He's had intimacy with other partners. He just doesn't want to be intimate with a woman unless she's his wife. So, how many women has he been intimate with that aren't you, that aren't his wife? You know what I mean? Like, that's crazy. Or how many people has he been married to? I don't know. I think, you know, find your newfound virginity with another partner. If you're not a virgin and you've like had sex with a bunch of people, but then you're just a virgin with me, I'm going to start like taking it, it's my man, but like it's my moves.

Just tell me what it is or don't tell me, but just stop pretending you want to have sex with me because then what does he want out of, I don't know. And you know, people have commented like, this is normal. Like a lot of couples do this. I know I've heard of it. It's not like I'm living on a different planet. He just seems very charismatic and sexual. Like, I get a sexual energy off of him. I really do. I don't get like a non-sexual energy. Maybe that's why, because he hasn't had sex in so long. It's just dripping off of him, you know?

I get a politician energy off of him. And that makes me nervous. Yeah. You know? I get a politician who has late night commercials, like selling, you know, knives that can cut through Coke cans, but also sexual. I got, I get all of it. It's a lot of, a lot of, it's a hybrid. He's got a lot of energy coming off of him. He's got like a charisma. He's got a Riz. Okay.

He's got Riz. So they are finishing up their workout and TJ is like, so how are you handling everything with the divorce? And she's like, how am I handling what specifically? It's like, you know, negotiations, progress where you are. And she's like, yeah, it's a lot. And he's like, he's like, I love that you avoid talking about it. She said, well, I don't mean if I'm spending time with you, I don't want to talk about heavy stuff. Like she's like, I don't want to talk about my ex on with you. I like that. Yeah. And then he's like, I don't want to talk about my ex on with you. I like that. Yeah.

And then he's like, Oh, we're on a date. We don't like, I don't want to talk about this in front of Gerard. Okay. Gerard's right over there. Okay. I don't want to make his booty sad. So Gerard's booty is just crying. It's like, Oh divorce. So TJ is like, but you don't want to talk about heavy stuff, but you want to lift heavy stuff. I was like, okay, you're losing me. TJ. You really are. No, just please just keep the camera focused on this, but please. Okay. More bet, more, but less talkie. Okay. So then, um,

she's like, well, you know, my husband and I were a very well known couple in this area and I serve on a lot of boards. So I'm really sort of walking a tight rope with my new best friend, but also being respectful of the life that I'm transitioning from. And he's like, there's a process for everything. Yeah, you fuck a lot. And then if you still want to fuck a few months later, then you move in together. And then after that, I don't know. I mean, everyone has their own process,

but before you buy is all I'm saying. She's like, can you just give me the grace of it being a new situation? He goes, I just need to make sure that there's a start and a finish. I'm like, I don't know if you guys even know what you're talking about anymore. You guys are speaking so abstractly to each other, but all I can say is, you never finish. You need to finish. That's the start. The start is that you finish. And then we can talk about the future. So now we're at Mia's apartment and

Inc is there and Mia's like, I want to make some cookies. He's like, I like that. And so, so Mia's like, oh my God, I love it here in this apartment. Like the kids are having the best time. I'll say it makes me feel good because they are so happy. Because she's now in her fourth location in four years, a new place every season. She's like Merrick Parks. Yeah. And she's like, the kids are happy because I'm happy. Not for long.

Spoiler alert. So then he's like, oh yeah, you know, there's so much good energy and you know, and look, like you like, Oh yeah, you know, there's so much good energy and, you know, and look, like you can see that monument, you know, that's good. She's like, yeah. So then they talk about the trip coming up and she's going to, you know, Lake Norman. And then he goes, is Auntie coming? And she goes, who's Auntie? Oh, Giselle. And goes, yeah, didn't she kick you guys out? She goes, oh, we talked. So now they talk about Karen and she has a court date. And she's like, well, when I took a peek, it said criminal court. And I'm like, why criminal

court? A jury? No wonder you're like on a whole campaign trail. Like you need to go shake some babies. Well, that's not how you say it. Yeah, she was like, you need to shake some babies. I mean, shake some hands and kiss some babies and then shake some babies. I mean, shake some hands. I love how slick Mia is that she just slides it right in there. You know, when I took a peek, I saw it's like you snooped

and people get in trouble on these shows all the time. Like, why would you look into that? Did you order a background check? And so she just like, I took a little peek. Just so funny. I just sort of puts it in there. Like she was just, you know, going through people magazine and decided to flip to page 66 just for a second and then flip back, you know?

Uh-oh, uh-oh. Ronnie fell over. Yeah. You safe? You safe in sound? I'm fine now. His camera just fell. Camera's toppling, you know? This safe in sound? I'm fine, yeah. His camera just fell. Camera's toppling, you know.

This is just another day at the office, Ben. So basically, Karen has a criminal court date and Ink is like, so you guys gonna try to support her? And she's like, yeah, well, should we have a sign saying, free Karen? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Um, didn't need the second Ink and Mia story. It was the same thing over and over, but you know, this episode's so funny, I'll forgive it. So then we go to Giselle going over to Zoo's cocktail garden with Ashley and there she's like, Oh, you know, listen, I think Karen has Jassie and Stassie under some spell, so I need to get these ladies away from Karen to get to know them without her, because they don't know Karen's tricks.

This is typical Karen behavior. When you know your back is up against the wall, make friends with new people. You caught her, you got it. Yep. So they arrive and Jassie's like, Giselle, I am really glad that you greeted me in a very lovingly manner

here at 23 o'clock. Oh wait, no, that's the wrong military time. Sorry, that was overseas military time. But yes, thank you for greeting me in a very loving manner. And Giselle's like, that's how I do, honey. And Jazzy's like, well, it was very different from last time, you know. So if that's how you do, you know, I'm happy to see that side. I was like, oh, a hug.

Let's do it. Okay. I appreciate that. And she's always like, well, you know, I can say I wasn't mad at you guys, you know, I really just Karen. At first she says it's different than last time and just like us it is. I was like, Oh, here we go. Let's see who breaks it first. Who breaks it. Cause she's like, listen, newbie, I'm not going to back down, but then she does because these newbies aren't fucking around. They're like, listen, newbie, I'm not going to back down. But then she does because these newbies aren't fucking around. They're like, listen here, lady, we can take you down.

I've already got stealing your show in my tagline. Okay. She's like, I've met Taylor Swift. Okay. Yeah. I'm Matt Taylor. I can pull some real rank over you right now. So Giselle's like, I, it really was towards Karen and I, it's something that Karen and I will deal with because Karen knew exactly what she was doing. So apologies for throwing you out. And they're like, oh, okay, cool. Thanks. Appreciate that. So then Wendy comes out and she's like, Giselle apologize. She starts cracking up and they're like, yeah, she did. And so Wendy's like, wow, who is this Giselle? What has happened to Giselle? This is Giselle's body double.

Crazy. Giselle's like, what is that strange fish smell? She's like, oh, sorry. It was the freezer. So my mother sends him. So Giselle's like, I know these ladies kind of like caught my wrath and didn't really have anything to do with that. And that's why I apologize because it wasn't nice. So anyway they start talking about this trip and everything and we see also a text from Mia, her invitation for Lake Norman. She goes like, Happy Friday Queens, I'd like to officially invite you all to travel

with me to the Queen City and we will stay in the state at Lake Norman for a much needed getaway. Crews dine and be fine. Check emails for additional information. See you all soon. Karen's going to jail. Please come to Lake Norman, the first place I ever became a billionaire businesswoman. So then, oh you said she lives like Meredith so now I'm like So then, oh, you said she lives like Meredith. So now I'm like, Meredith, well, there never was a discussion either way about which Lake Norman we're going to. Please everybody join me in a call to Lake Bruxy where everybody gets my bottles.

They get their logos stamped on jogging pants from Olly. If anyone will also be bringing their toddler, I will be providing free swimmies for everyone because Bruxy is still learning how to swim. So they're talking about that, who's going to come and who's not. And Stacy's like, well, I'm going to come. And I have a beautiful daughter. I've been married 16 years and I have a beautiful, amazing daughter, Arabella. She's eight and we're going through divorce, not me and my daughter, unfortunately. But in the past 16 years, we were together, we sort of lost each other, not Arabella. Does it sound like I'm divorcing and losing my child? Because

I really don't mean that. We have a great relationship. I'm very responsible with her. Gisele's like, so do you want to divorce? Because it sounds like you're sad about it. There was nothing that Stacey said. It sounded like Stacey was sad that that's a sad thing. But I'm like, whoa, Gisele goes right to trying to make Stacey sound like she misses her husband, right? Because it sounds like you're sad about it. When I was getting to the end of the road, I was happy. That's why I'm asking. You're not happy. What's wrong with you? Are you okay? Do you want to make out with your ex-husband right now? You do, don't you? This isn't your fault. She's terrible. Like it's abnormal to be sad that you're getting a divorce.

Yeah. So weird. She's like, And Ash is like, well, don't worry. She has a new friend. And she's like, oh, so you've moved on. And Stacey's like, I cannot believe that you would say that. And she's like, yeah, no, she has a new friend. Like, sorry, Stacey, I had to say it. Otherwise everyone would be like, what? She's a good, what, what? And she's like, no, it's just, Ashley, I have spent multiple days with you at my home talking about my marriage and my children. I have never been so offended by someone saying I have a new friend.

And she's like, oh, she came over for charcuterie and drinks and just spilled all of my business after I provided charcuterie and drinks. Did I mention that? Ashley was like, what? Because this is ridiculous. You're shooting scenes, you're talking about this guy. You're talking about TJ on camera, and then you're shocked that it's brought up on camera.

And Stacey's like, Ashley, I am so cautious because I'm talking about the mental health of my daughter on national television, no less. And I'm not ashamed of my friend. I'm ashamed of the way that you brought it to this very tiny table we're all sitting at." She's like, okay. I didn't know you were telling people individually, you know. I mean, America is full of a lot of people, but I didn't know. And she's like, Ashley is really surprising

me. I've never been more surprised in my entire life. And she's just not the person I thought she was. She's not at all. And Ashley was like, I didn't even know TJ was a bean to spill. The way it was conveyed to me, you just had a friend. She talks about Vivian all the time. If TJ is just a friend like Vivian, what's the big deal? Why can't I just say his name? Well, you know, he's not just a friend. But to Ashley's credit, she did say you have a new friend. Like Ashley, we have seen Ashley at her messiest and this was definitely not her messiest. I actually don't even think it was actually said in a messy way. I think she just brought it up in a nice way. Like, well, you have

someone else now. I thought she was actually just defending Stacey against Giselle. This new cast is not going to have it from any of these ladies. That's for damn sure. And I think it's so funny. All of them. I mean, at least Jazzy and Stacey are both like ready. They're like, you're not going to treat us like shit. Okay. Yeah.

We're not going to get the first season brush off from you two. Okay. Yeah. And so then, um, Kierna, oh, now it's travel day. She gets an apology. Okay. And Giselle's like, well, you know, they say that kids self-awareness and sense of self is based on their mother's happiness. So focus on your happiness because it's only going to make your daughter better. Okay.

Well thanks for the advice. No one's asking you your parenting advice. She's like, I'm still just thank you. Thank you for saying that. She just like literally puts her hair. Yeah, she puts her hair. So now it's time for everyone to go to the airport, to go to Lake Norman. So Kieran is there and she's like, let's go to Lake Norman because I'm hoping for this to be a super cute girls trip and let's get ready to have a cute ass time.

So, you know, talking about how it's gonna be nice to go on this trip, et cetera. They're gonna have a good Kiki and, you know, talking about how it's gonna be nice to go on this trip, et cetera, and they're gonna have a good Kiki and, you know, but, but Giselle's gonna have, she and Karen need to do some talking. So they're like, we're Stacy and Mia says, she's taking a car, you guys, because somebody in her family died in an aviation accident. So for the month of May, she doesn't fly. And everyone's just like, huh.

Everyone's like, we want to make out of this, but we feel like we can't. So we'll just go, huh. So, um. That's something the month of May. All right. Yeah. We see a flashback where Stacy's like, I want to honor my mother's brother.

She's like, okay. Oh. So, um, now they are, they fly, they land, they get into different cars and everything. And, um, Karen was asking Jassy how long she's been dating her man and they're talking about dating for a few years. And, um, Jassy was talking about how he's never been married and stuff like that, but he has, he has children and, um, you know, just finding out more about them. Yeah. And then, uh, Wendy in the other car is talking about turning 40 and she was like, this is the last day of my 30s. Isn't that crazy? And Gisele's like, no.

Not really. So, then they're talking about church and Wendy's like, do you go to Catholic church on Sundays? And she said yes. And she goes, oh my God, do you really? I learned something about Gisele Bryant every time I'm with her. I never knew this. And she's like, the only time I stopped going to Catholic church was when I was married. And she's like, but wasn't that a big transition for you because he's Baptist? She goes like, she's like, yeah, at the time, you know, because he's AME, African Methodist Episcopal Church. And Wendy is like, yeah, it's a totally different vibe. Totally. Yeah, yeah. So, I mean, once you get out of, I can't believe you go back to Catholic Church. I know you haven't

been to many churches been, but Catholic Church is like the roughest of all the churches as far as rules and regulations and length, girl. It's like, hours. Yeah, I've been to Catholic weddings. Weddings. They're forever. They're forever. They're like the length of a term, like bringing a child to term. They take forever. Catholic school's harsh.

They beat you with rulers. It's like rough. And so, once you get out and you see like other kinds of church, I can't believe anybody would go back. It's like every other church is like a rock concert compared to Catholicism. Wow. Well- It's very Giselle though. You're like, I love it. I can't wait to go back to five hour services. So Giselle is telling the same that she's actually enjoying Wendy. She's like, can you

imagine that's coming out of my mouth right now? I'm enjoying Wendy. And Wendy's like, we're taking baby steps. It's going to take time, but we'll see where it goes. Like, yes, but by the way, did you have to bring that giant frozen fish into this car? That's the place. I'm sorry, it sticks to my fingers, sticks to my fingers. Just trying to get it away from my mother. So then we go to me and Karen and she's like, oh, Karen, this is gonna be so much fun.

We're in Queen City and I want us to behave like queens. So how are you doing? How are you doing? I've already called the tree, still can't talk. How are you? Karen's like, where I'm going to a lot. My back is against the wall and you know how it's legal. You can't talk about it. And I just, I try not to say that over and over again, but I can't make it less legal. I can't just cut out half of law and order and expect it to still air every night in every country across the world. Karen, it's on the internet though. I don't even know what that sound was, Karen, but it's on the internet. She goes, well, then read it. Well, I did. I took a little peek and she was like, okay. She goes, well, that's why I'm checking

on you. She goes, no, it's all about taking care of Karen. Like I'm always soldiering for someone else in my family. And it was a moment when it just all hit. And by it all hit, I mean, I hit it as in a tree, an offense, and maybe a little animal. Oh, you were distracted. And she goes, Oh, I can't talk about that part because I don't want to incriminate myself. And so Mia's like, I'm just trying to like ask this lady some questions, you know, like I'm not trying to chastise her, but you still like, can't even admit she did anything wrong. And that's kind of the first step. And so then, I mean, it's the first step in admitting you have a problem in

alcoholism, but I don't think we're going to get to that first step. Yeah. I don't think it's the first step in, in, um, avoiding jail time. So, we're fine. So Mia's like, well, there's gotta be a time when you're gonna break. And Karen's like, me break? What? I'm like, Karen's face is already like. And then we see hours later and we see flashback,

we'll flash forwards of what's to come next episode, which is lots of fighting and accusations and what looks to be a very fun trip to Lake Norman. Yes. Great episode. Love having Potomac back. I know. So good. Cracking me up again. God, it's such a nice feeling to watch this show and laugh so hard. I love that the turnaround was so quick. It wasn't like a three season turnaround. Like they got right back into it this season. They're like back where they normally are. The newbies came out swinging like they are ready to go. They're all funny. They all have kind of a

story. So it's, it's fun. Good job. I'm loving it. And we will see you guys tonight for crappy hour. Thanks for everybody on Patreon for listening to the bonuses, checking out our videos, all that good stuff. We love you guys and we will talk to you next time okay bye bye watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors ain't no thing like allison king ashley savoni she don't take no baloney we're fanning out for bethany fanning put your hands together for carly clapp dana c dana duke erin McNicholas! She don't miss no trick-a-lis! Jamie! She has no less name-y! Hava Nagila Webber!

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