Watch What Crappens - #2616 RHOP 0906: The First Crack

Episode Date: November 11, 2024

The Real Housewives of Potomac are still in Lake Norman giving endless speeches about how inspiring Wendy is, and Mia takes us back to where it all began. The first crack the back location! Oh yeah and Mia was an opioid addict. Enjoy! To watch this recap on video, listen to all of our bonus episodes, and join in our new community chat, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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remarkably bright creatures by Shelby van Pelt. Find what piques your imagination. Sign up for a free 30-day Audible trial and your first audiobook is free. Visit audible.ca to sign up. Kill List is a true story of how I ended up in a race against time to warn those whose lives were in danger. Follow Kill List wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Kill List and more exhibit-seed Truecrum shows like Morbid early and ad-free right now by joining Wandry+. Truecrump shows like Morbid early and ad free right now by joining Wondry Plus. Hello and welcome to Watch for Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about.

I'm Ben Mandelkirch and joining me today, Ronnie Karam. Hi Ronnie, how are you? Well, hello. How are you? I'm doing great, thanks. Happy Veterans Day. It's Veterans Day here in the States. Did you have a nice weekend? I sure did. I built myself a new couch desk. So today I'm doing this

from my new couch desk, everybody. Hello out there. This is a new, more relaxed me today. Hope you enjoy it. I'm already thrilled by it. So today we are talking about the Real Housewives Potomac. Before we get into that, we've got all our stuff on Patreon. You should go check out. We have just converted to a monthly setup. So now it's just when you support all that stuff about like, oh, Capit, da da da da da. You don't have to worry. You can just support it. It's like every other Patreon that's out there now. There are a few little growing pains. So if you notice something strange with your billing, just message us on Patreon and we will tend to it because we're not trying to mess with anyone or anything. So go check

that out and you can see our lovely faces. You can see Ronnie's brand new setup and his brand new microphone. And aside from that, you know, we got a fun week of recap. So let's dive into some Potomac, shall we? Let's do it, buddies. Well, it's still Wendy's birthday. Good Lord. How long has it been Wendy's birthday? Jesus Christ is going to turn 50 by the time they stop celebrating this birthday. I don't understand this lining people up to celebrate you like this. I don't do this at all. I'm like, you wanna go to Target? Maybe, maybe I'll ask somebody to Target on my birthday.

Maybe occasionally a happy hour or something. But the full on giving speeches and like what you've done for me, no, I'm not doing that. Get the fuck out of here. I'm already buying you a present and probably your dinner, okay? You don't get a speech. How about Ronnie bought my dinner tonight and here's why I love Ronnie and then give

a speech about me. What the fuck am I giving you a speech for? You got all the presents. You got everything for free. Wow. You were born. Congratulations. It is funny because later in the episode, Wendy has this realization that, you know, she is enough. Like she doesn't need all these things. She is enough. And then it's like, but also tell me all the good things about me because I'm like, I would say I'm 95% enough, but I need the other 5% filled in by you guys. So tell me all the great things I've done. Thanks. Well, that was also interesting because she was like,

well, you know, you guys have known me through so much. I had babies and then I've had all these business ventures. And now I realize I don't need business ventures. I'm enough. No, what happened to your candles? I want to know. Also, what's the truth about your assistant professorship? I want to know things.

No one's enough. Base yourself on work only. I'm just kidding. I don't think this couch desk is working. I was supposed to be in a better mood. Well we open up the cliffhanger with Stacey sitting down, Karen, and saying, should I be worried about you? The girls are saying that you need to go to rehab.

Should we be concerned, Karen? And Karen's like, hmm, thank you. Thank you, Stacey, for asking me. And no, no, you should not be concerned, Karen?" And Karen's like, "'Hmm, thank you, thank you, Stacy, for asking me. And no, no, you should not be concerned. The one who should be concerned is every traffic median in the country because you never know when I'm gonna come for you. Don't speak bad about me.'"

I'll tell you, you should be concerned. Dear, dear, who are trying to confuse me every time I go out on the road, I'm watching you, dear. And Jassy is like, "' so rehab isn't something that you feel like you need at all. No, people don't feel like they need rehab. They wake up there one day, probably tied to something. Okay. No one just says, Hey, you know what I think I feel I need?

We have no you are dragged there by somebody. Okay, or you're, you're surrounded by family members with caring looks on their faces for some reason, and it turns out you've been fucking up, and then they put a sack over your head, and then you wake up next to Sandra Bullock for 28 days. I'm pretty sure the lyrics to the song are not, they tried to make me go to rehab, and I said,

okay, hold on, let me pack an overnight bag, can you guys water my plants? Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Luann was on, watch what happens live with Stacy. They were very cute. They were an oddly cute couple. And Luann, you know, every question was, well, you know, I'm in a cabaret. I'm a cabaret star. So let me tell you a song that has something to do with this. Liza first sang it to me back when I was just a little baby. But she was on there and she was like, you know, as I was singing my song in my show,

they tried to make me go to rehab. And I say, yes, yes, yes. Because rehab's a vacation. You just sit around there. Rehab's lovely. You just have you time. I was like, I don't think that you said yes, yes, yes when they send you to rehab. You sure you didn't just go to a spa.

Ace and call them a pig and threatened to kill everybody. As I recall, but you know, things are sure different when you tell them through musicals. Yeah, so Stacey's like, so you never told them that you wanted to go and just never again, it goes, Well, let me ask you something here and it's like, so you never told him that you wanted to go? And she's like, never. And Karen goes, well, let me ask you something, Karen. Karen is very open and honest about who she is and what she has going on. And Karen's like, well, that doesn't really bother me because I am an advocate for people who if we get sick, let's help, but let's not go to fundraisers in honor of them.

And okay, and by the way, Mia has been to rehab herself, by the way, I just want to drop that one right in there. And they're like, what? She's like, yes, yes, yes. She joined the joint, she started the joint practice because she had an opioid addiction. She was so high on Oxycontin that she actually went and opened up a chiropractor's office.

I mean, that truly is the only thing you do do when you're super high on drugs. I'm at this, first of all, Karen, this is pretty low, okay, to bring up somebody's opioid addiction. Now Mia goes so fucking low all the fucking time. I think she's literally in the back googling right now all the charges so that she can read them while waving her finger around. So she kind of deserved it. But this is really low bringing shit up like this on camera. But second of all, yeah, I don't understand what Karen is saying. She was so, she wasn't doing so much heroin, and that's why she opened a joint chiropractic because really at the end of the day, at least it had the

word joint in it and it wasn't heroin. Because she couldn't find a business called heroin to open. so she just opened something called joint and you know baby steps to recovery is what we call it. You know the thing is this poor Mia, she got so confused she said because she thought she was actually going to get a joint and said she opened a joint and then she just sort of went with it but you know that's what opioid addiction is all about. And for what he'll mean the first joint chiropractic was burnt down because Mia tried to smoke it. That was sad. I shouldn't be saying that, should I? Well, payback's a bitch, Mia.

So, Karen just stands up, because Karen just mentions opioid addiction just so casually. Karen was like, God damn it, Karen, are you kidding me? Karen's like, no, I'm not gonna sit here and act like that should unravel me when I know my truth. Okay, I care what the final black and white is, which is funny, that is the color of the election sign I ran over on that traffic median. So, you know. And Stacy's like, I just can't believe this.

Oh, what? Oh, what opioid addiction? Oh, what? Opioid addiction, what Karen? And Karen's like, well, you know, Stacy tells us, she's like, I love Karen, but this is just too much at this point. I mean, now we're just throwing out opioid addiction. Mia may be a lot of things, but we're not gonna do that.

We are not gonna do that. We are not going to do that. Yes, you will. You will. Welcome, Stacey. Welcome to Bravo. Well, you know what? My cold day, it is in two weeks, and I know it's hard for you as my friends, you know, to wait. And Stacey's like, well, it just, it hurt me to hear that about you. Yes, well, you know, look who you're talking to. You're talking to a woman who is sleeping with her boyfriend while her husband is in the house with her. I mean, are you kidding me? No, I'm good.

Also opioid addiction, opioid induced joint opening. That's what that's happening there. Customers were saying that they were going into the joint and Mia offered to do surgery and she was taking out discs and then trying to inject them. Karen, that is enough, Karen. She had to go to the hospital for trying to inject herself with spinal cord discs. Karen, I've heard enough. Mia doesn't want to protect anyone. Mia wants to elevate herself.

She'll step on Jesus to stand up. And I take this personally. Payback is a motherfucker. And so Karen is like, I love you, Karen. Jesus will stand up and I take this personally. Payback is a motherfucker. And so Kieran is like, I love you, Kieran. She's like, I love you too, baby. I love you too. Such a long, long road of exposing heroin addiction. I need to lie down. So then Wendy's like, yeah, I feel like for my girls dealing with all this drama, but you know, I'm in a birthday bubble because it's my birthday. So happy birthday to me. Yeah, I feel like for my girls dealing with all this drama, but you know, I'm in a birthday bubble because it's my birthday. So happy birthday to me. Yeah, we know. So then Ashley's FaceTiming Dylan, who is like, yeah, she'll say no, I'm slowly getting used to being a

single mom. And like, I'm going out with my friends and I'm traveling and I'm establishing healthy routines for my son, you know, and then we see like her son, her three year old son, on top of the car on the car roof in the garage just flopping around. I was like, is this what part of this is the healthy routine? You remind me it's like cut to him like juggling knives. Well, you know, we have to get him used to living in the same neighborhood as Karen. So you know, what have to get him used to living in the same neighborhood as Karen. So you know, what do you do when you're on top of a windshield and can't get off, you

know? Color, that's what I say. Teach them well and let them lead the way. Also, I love that Ashley's like, oh, you know, I'm just getting used to be a single mom. So I'm traveling a lot and I'm going out with my friends. Oh, okay. That sounds like a wonderful version of single mother. I haven't heard of that one. You guys, I'm a single mom now. Vacation time, yeah. Night out with the girls, party. Single mom, party. So then, now a bunch of the women are sitting at the pool and Stacey's, they're talking about what

they're gonna be doing today. Stacey's like, so are we just getting adjustments today? I mean, because I haven't gotten an adjustment in a long time. And, you know, I'm sure they were all dying to make a joke about that. But Karen is like, well, I actually used to support me as businesses. I had a joint membership. And we see flashbacks of Karen going to the opening of the joint. I still find this to be so funny. And even on this episode, the way that Mia talks about opening up a chiropractic office is she acts as if she's opened up an orphanage in a remote country. For real. It's like Oprah's school for girls in Africa. She's like, every single time she was literally acting. I mean, look, it's the

car writer offices are helpful, you know, but like the joint is kind of just like one of those generic businesses that's in a strip mall, you know, and like it has its utility. I've gone several times. I, I have a joint member. I used to be a joint member and then I was like, I don't need to, I don't need to be on this. Like they make you like sign up for like a monthly thing. I'm like, I'm not going once a month. This is stupid. And the receptionist had bad, bad breath. And I have to go in and talk with her. And I was like, Oh, I was like being getting mustard gas in your face. Every time I was like, you know what? I don't think I need the joint anymore. You need a little, you know, Mentos chiropractic, ma'am.

So then what is that? She's acting like she's like really saving the world by opening up like a Jamba juice or something like that. It's like, no, let's just relax. It's a joint chiropractic. So Karen, we see a flashback to 2021 when the support of Karen was getting her back cracked, and they were really cracking that thing. I mean, Jesus Christ, it was like, I was like, did somebody pour some rice crisps, some milk over some rice crispies? What the fuck is going on over there? It's like three little guys with dippity doo hair just started dancing around her, you know? So that's a

lot of snap, crackle and pop in there. And then so I'm like, you'd pop. There's no, now it's only snap and crackle. Did you hear about that? What happened to pop? He was run over by Karen. That's very sad. But did they really discontinue pop no but you set that up beautifully thank you you can't play with me like that i'm like what do to get canceled god we're just canceling everybody he can't even make some of the popping sound on serial anymore well he should have been at the cereal factory not walking on a traffic median in the middle of the night. It's not my fault he was there. I'm suing him for never giving me this problem with the police.

You know, it's Pop's problem that I have problems with Popo. You can't. Let me tell you one thing. You can't spell opioid without pop, sort of. He was high. High as a kite on that median wasn't my fault. In fact, I swerved to avoid him, but then I went to pity him instead. It wasn't my fault. It was self-defense.

Oh gosh. Or the vanity to start with. So yeah, it's like pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, and then Karen discusses, I'm real. I'm real. She's real. She's real, guys. So then Jassy comes out to join them and she's like,

this is why I come to Lake Norman to be in a bikini by a pool. And so she goes into the pool and they're like, oh my God, she's even hotter when she's wet. Was the point of this that she was thinking that she was gonna jump into the pool and still be kind of like above the water, like she thought it was gonna be like the shallow end,

but it was actually the deep end, so she wound up going all the way underwater. Cause everyone was like, oh my God. And they even use this in the trailer, I think, of someone just like plopping into the water. And we were like, oh, and I wonder if that was like, Oh my God. And they even use this in the trailer. I think of someone just like plopping into the water. And we were like, Oh, and I wonder if that was it. If maybe that was going on. Why was that?

I was just going to skip over that. Cause they did do weird things where everybody was horrified. And maybe I was wondering if it was like, so hard to do your hair later or something. Yes. That's what I was thinking. But yeah, they were all like, Oh my God, she jumped in the water. And then Ashley was like, I wanted to play the jazz music. I was like, that's not the jazz music, man.

She's like, she's playing like 76 trombones. I was like, I don't think you ever saw Jaws, baby. She's like, yeah, that's the jazz music because that was scary. So I don't know. I don't know what happened. Yeah, they didn't. They did like, this was a moment. Okay. I'm going to, by the way, let me just say something. I have been so thrilled with the season of Potomac so far. It has been so good. This episode was a little, I am coming. No, no, no. It's at least a poetry slam. This, this was, this to me was, I was like, no, no. Make rhymes with Elisa Poetry, slam.

This to me was, I was like, okay, this is one of those episodes where they need to fill it up so that way they can end it. They can end the episode. They don't have quite enough content to get to the end of the trip, so they're going to stretch everything out. It's my baby's birthday. And so it's her birthday. But the moment I started to realize that that's what this was going on with this episode was when Jassy went into the pool and then we had like 45 seconds of

like Jaws and like the pool, like pool commentary. I was like, Oh, they got nothing this episode. Okay. It's one of these episodes. Got it. Yeah. Uh, so they start kind of rehashing different stuff from the day. Like, Oh my gosh, you talks on FaceTime the most with their partner. You guys, it might be Stacy has Stacy loves to FaceTime with our partner. And then we see clips of that where he's like, Hey, hello there, friend and only friend, God, glad you're not here because I am only having to figuratively hold you at arm's length. How's it going over there?

And she's like, I just can't wait to see you. I'm so excited to stick my, to stick your way. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa Whoa, we're not going there yet. All right. All right. I don't know. I don't know that I'm ready for that But I should you know, he was like anything He was also on Watch what happens. He was the bartender and he was back there just looking cute his day with see-through You know, you know West Hollywood rave shirt on. I threw shirt on.

Yeah, he was wearing a yeah, and it had like a pattern on it of like velvet or something. It was like black velvet, and then see through. And I was like, Wow, way to dispel those rumors, sir. Really? Wait, I didn't dispel all that. But, um, you know, Stacy's, he's really cute though. And Stacy is fucking gorgeous. My I saw her, I saw her and I was like, wow, she's a knockout, but she's definitely like, you know, like if you had never told me she had worked on QVC, I would be like, this person works on QVC.

And I don't mean that as an insult. I mean, like she just is like, so telegenic and TV ready. And like, she is be like, this person works on QVC. And I don't mean that as an insult. I mean, she just is so telegenic and TV ready and she is just like, she knows all her angles. She knows the camera and everything. I'm like, wow, this person knows what they're doing on the show. Yeah, that's true. And she's also just so funny. I mean, she was really funny and really charismatic.

And I think her morning show stuff probably pays off here too, because I guess she's a morning show person. But yeah, she was great. She was really, really funny. And she handled all the questions great. So anyway- And the job was done, by the way, a very good job with newbies this season.

I think Stacey has been great. I think obviously we have our Ronwin discussion. And then there's someone else, oh, Tilleen on Dubai goodbye Dubai BTW we'll talk about Dubai this week um and there were some other newbies i can't remember but i just remember feeling like like okay Bravo is doing a nice job i think Stacy's great it's time for a commercial it's time for a crappence commercial in a quiet suburb, a community is shattered by the death of a beloved wife and mother. But this tragic loss of life quickly turns into something even darker. Her husband had tried to hire a hitman on the dark web to kill her.

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So follow the best idea yet on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to the best idea yet early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus. It's just the best idea yet. yet. So anyway, Jassy is, Stacey is talking about how she's like, you know, the feelings I have for TJ, I miss him when I don't talk to him. We pray together, we talk about our future plans together. We work out together. We don't talk about things together. I just want to introduce him to Arabella one day. And Jazzy's like, that's some real feelings right there. Why? Why? Because she wants to introduce to the daughter one day. I don't know. It's like basic entry level things you would want out of relationship, you know, like having feelings and missing each other. That's some real shit right there. You're actually, wait a second, you guys talk, you guys talk about plans. That's some real shit right there. You're actually, wait a second, you guys talk? You guys talk about plans? That is a real relationship, right?

Yeah, just like super basic stuff. But, you know, I guess the thing that bothers me, and it's not really religion because, you know, I get it. And I think that people who are religious, of course, they would pray together at some point. But I just feel like that's just not a new dating thing to do. But I guess I've never really met anybody at church. Like you want to pray together? What are you doing tonight? You want to pray together? No, not really. Can we go to a movie or something? Like that's the ultimate and cheap dating, you know? You want to get together and pray? No, I can fucking do that on my own. You know, you want to get together to poop? That's just like basic maintenance stuff. You know what I mean? I don't need you here, sir. So then Karen is like,

and you'll be divorced when? And Stacy's like, well, you know, I really don't have an answer for that because we have agreed. We have not agreed on all the things we need to agree on. And well, you know, Ashley can tell you about that, right Ashley? What's going on with you?" And Ashley's like, yes, June 11th, and I'm going into mediation. So she's not even getting divorced on June 11th. It's just that the next phase is starting on June 11th for Ashley after all these years. Yeah. So, and Stacy's like, oh, you have a date? She goes, oh, yeah, it's going to be done. I want to have an agreement so I can actually file for divorce one day. Okay. So, um, no one actually is the Robin. She is, she is the Robin of divorce. Like we spent years waiting for Robin and Juan to remarry and then they finally

did it. And now we're spending years for Ashley and Michael to unmarry. Yeah. And she does this whole thing where she's like, well, you know, we haven't had to sit down for a very long time, but I'm so excited to start this first step of hopefully many, many, many, many, many, many steps that will begin the pre section of my divorce from Michael, who I still totally want to fuck, which you can totally tell every time I talk about him that I'm probably still laying the guy. So can't wait.

So I want to ask Ashley, you've got two beautiful boys. Are they meeting your dates or are they not? Absolutely not. Okay. I know. And are you going to do that after you get a divorce? Are you always going to run them by Michael? And she's like, well, similarly, if he's ever gonna have a woman around, we have an agreement that I meet her first. So they're just basically talking about kids and arrangements. And honestly, nothing that's like terribly fascinating. AC Yeah. And basically, Stacy's like, wow, you know, I didn't even think about that. I didn't even think about that part that you, I didn't even think about that part that, you know, you have to get permission

from each other to date. And Karen is like, yeah, that's so much pressure. And Karen's like, well, I'll just give you what I did. I wanted to make sure that I was engaged first. All right, that's what I did. And Karen is saying, yeah, well, Karen's old school, you know, I mean, you know, married. Karen is like, you know, driving yourself instead of calling a new birth. There's just so many ways.

Very old school. She's Karen is basically like, you know, I'm currently in a relationship with someone who has children and, you know, and this way, like he gets to see she's basically saying the perks of or the benefit of meeting the kids first is that he gets to see how his kids interact with her rather than like waiting until you get engaged to meet them and everything. And she talks about how, you know,

when it comes to Greg and his kids, that their comfort and their happiness is just always, she's always gonna support that, whether it means doing a movie night or cooking or anything like that, she's just gonna be like the rich auntie in the house. So Jassy is like, well, yeah, you know, I'm in a situation where my significant other has children and it can be really tricky, you know. I mean, I would say that once you

knew that engagement was right around the corner and then we see a clip of her looking at rings with Darius. She's like, that would be a more clever time. Like they're all trying to give Stacey advice, but they're all in wrecks of relationships. So Stacey's like, you're literally all what I'm trying to avoid, especially Jassy, which we find out as the said goes on. I mean, Jassy, like girl, no, no, no advice needed. Thank you. This was great. Like I was so happy to find out that Jassy has this super messy situation and I'm going to, okay, I'm going to go out on a limb and say the reason why Jassy was not a, um,

did not get chosen to be a real housewife is that this background situation is so messy. And I'm going to predict that as the woman grill her on it, she's going to pull away because she's going to say like, Hmm, do I want to be with an NFL player or do I want to be on this show? I'm going to choose the NFL player. That's my prediction. I thought she was also on the show or maybe it's just a rumor, but I think there's another show coming out about the Kansas city chief's wife's like wag. And I think she's on that. So I think this is just like introducing us to her and then she's on something else. I think.

Got it. Maybe. So, Karen's like, well, whatever leads to ultimate happiness. I say, go for it. You know, with children being a priority, children are the priority. Are they not girls?

I mean, I remember raving, raving, little tiny ray, little ray face looking out at me. I would just say, Ray. I was back before I knew chickens were dirty birds. I forgot what we were talking about. Children. Right. Bored with them. I'm so glad she's gone. Sorry. What was that? You're saying children are the most important thing. Children are the most important thing. Tell your children who you're fucking. That's my advice. Karen, are you okay? important thing. Tell your children who you're fucking. That's my advice. Karen, are you okay?

I'm so I may be high off of the opioid fumes coming out of Mia's room. So speaking of which Jacqueline emerges and she sits down and Wendy and then Wendy comes out and she's really proud of her leg muscles and she's showing him her legs and everything. And then now finally Mia joins them and she's like, special memory, this can bring Wendy. Oh, is it a pile of oxygotton, you drug addict? Karen, what was that even about? Oh, so Wendy's like, oh, this came for me? Awesome.

This is from Eddie Carter Cruz and the dog Zoe. Wait, the daughter didn't daughter didn't Cameron Cameron didn't contribute to the skip cameras like I stand in defiance of my mother. Yeah, she's like, I'm not sending that woman shit. Okay. shit, okay? So Stacy's like, well, Wendy, are we gonna see that body in this pool? Show me how to model. So Wendy starts strutting around and everything and they're like, oh, whatever. They all start dancing and then they all start making fun of Stacy because she's a really stiff dancer. This is a godsend for Gisele because Giselle was for the longest time really up until the season the worst dancer in this group.

And now they've got Stacey. So Giselle is finally in the game. Stacey at least is, you know, she's doing, I think maybe the jitterbug, I think is what she's doing. But it's still better than Giselle. Okay. Stacey is doing that like medieval Shakespearean love dance where you put your hand against each other and you sort of go around in a circle with your partner. Like, I'm expecting

her to like curtsy and then find a new partner and slowly. Yeah, Stacey's dance will get her into heaven for sure. She's like, I don't drop it like it's hot. I don't shake that thing. I just move, you know, the way that the music tells me. I just, I just, you know, all the music. Stacey, you're just doing a sign of the cross. Still, I'm just hoping it'll get me laid, let's be honest. TJ and I just don't believe in dancing. He often says that John Lithgow is the real hero of dirty dancing. I mean, Footloose. He won't even watch dirty dancing.

dancing. I mean, Footloose. You won't even watch dirty dancing. So they're like, Oh my God, please just stop Stacy. Please Stacy just stop. It hurts to watch you, you know. So they dance a little bit. And then of course, Wendy is sitting there clapping her ass in someone's face. No, it was Mia. there clapping her ass in someone's face. No, it was Mia. Mia was twerking on Kierna's face. And Kierna's like,

Okay, get your ass off me. I'm not gonna, okay. I'm not over your ass, cause I'm all, I'm good. I'm choking on my own Kierna impersonation. I think I have to speak like a normal person. She's like, I'm not over your ass, cause I'm gonna be on your ass in a minute. So then Giselle comes.

Her version was better. We just hear. She said it was funnier. We just hear birds, birds start squawking and flying out of trees. And then all the leaves fall off of the trees and like cats start losing all their hair. And Giselle's like, I'm back.

So Giselle comes back because guys, I left for less than 24 hours because my children had an event. They graduated. It was sad. I cried. They're so big now. They're huge.

And they graduated. I'm a mother, a mother who let her, I was like, oh my God, please, please stop her. Stop this monologue. I can't take anymore between you and Wendy with it's her birthday. Enough. Taylor. I literally still do not understand the timeline here. Like I just refuse to accept it. Like at this point, it's gotta be like 11 AM or noon or I don't know, like based on where they go and what they do, I just,

how far is it to fly from, from Potomac to Lake, to Lake Norman? I'm gonna look up right now. I'm looking up. It's driving me absolutely nuts. It is okay to drive. It's a six hour drive. So flight, I don't even know how you, you can't get flight information. Okay, fine. I just, I don't know. how you can't get flight information. Okay, fine. I just, I don't know, I just feel like something is up.

I feel like there was like a day we didn't see personally. Well, I can't believe that they would cut it. I mean, from watching everything they're doing, they are twerking. I mean, what, what, what could they possibly have cut? So then, um, it just, I was like, well, so was it fun? Because she sees Jesse sitting in the kitchen, Jesse's doing her makeup. Then we get the best taste of Jesse that we've had so far.

She's like, so how was everything? Jesse's like, I mean, it was fun if you weren't in it. She goes, what does that mean? She's like, baby, we've got people that are basing their business off an ex-dealing drug money. And I mean, it's just been a lot. She's laughing at it. She goes, whose business was funded by drug dealers?

And she's like, Kay. And Ashley was asking about Kay's scar, and if she actually had a scar, something like that. She's like, she clearly has a visible scar. She's like, well, that's what I said. I said, do you have glasses? And then Ashley said, no, she doesn't have glasses. So that's, it was so funny in this scene. And she was like, well, what did you do, Jesse? She goes, well,

I listened and I was like, okay. She goes, well, is that, is this last night or is this morning? Do we need a nap? She was like, oh, that was breakfast. That was, that was the breakfast conversation. She goes, oh, so is everybody mad right now? She goes, well, I wouldn't call them mad. She's like, well, who should I check on right now? She's like, well, no, look, they serve us food, so everything is all good. So then everyone starts to come up to the… Everyone starts filtering up to this room, to this dining room and saying hello hello hello and everything and everyone's saying hi and um Giselle's like well clearly all hell broke loose everybody should be exhausted from the shade and the screaming of it all like let's just have a nice day can we do that so um they're like oh Giselle's back yay and Jack looks like these ladies don't

know how to act when you're goneeline's like, these ladies don't know how to act when you're gone. It's like you're one of the only ones who realizes I'm a bad ass bitch and I'm here to stay. I'm Jacqueline and no one's taking Jacqueline down. Am I right, girls? No one's taking Jacqueline, okay. Yeah, it's like this is Jacqueline.

Jacqueline is really trying to stake her claim. So now they're all, like Mia's Jack. Jacqueline is really trying to stake her claim. So now they're all like Mia's like, okay, everyone, like, let's do shots. So they serve she's like serves tequila shots. She's pouring tequila shots into people's mouths and everything. She pours some vodka into Stacy Stacy's like, do I have to swallow a TJ says it's a sin. Like no swallow. So then Mia takes this Casamigos bottle. And when we say that she inserts it into her mouth, I mean, this lady could have a side career as a sword swallower because that thing goes deep. First of all, also, that's a

communal bottle. So why are you sticking so much of it into your mouth right now? She deep throw to the bottle and then she swore, uh, swung her head back and like took it down her lungs. I don't know. And then she was like, yeah, ladies. And so they all start making, you know, deep throat jokes, of course. And then ladies. Ladies. Like, oh.

Oh. Mia. So then. They're laughing. She just basically admitted that she's fucking both of those guys, you know. At the same time, right? She's always like,

Mia, you just solidified what we've all been thinking. So they're like, wow. Stacy's like, that is a special skill that most women don't have. And if I wanted to gain that skill, I know TJ would not be where I'd be. I'd be like, oh, Stacey's like, that is a special skill that most women don't have. And if I wanted to gain that skill, I know TJ would not be where I'd be practicing.

Okay, so then now Wendy and Giselle are talking and she's like, you know, yesterday I walked out on Stacey on the balcony and she was like twirling her hair while she talked to the guy and Gisele's like, so do we know this TJ person? And she goes, what do you mean? Do you know him? You can go there in the car now. She's like, Google him if you want to. She goes, I'm going to. And she's like, oh, he's an actor. He's a walk on actor. She's oh, an actor. She goes, yeah, Tom Thomas, Anthony Jones. So I think she said a working actor. She said he's a working actor. She goes yeah, Tom Thomas Anthony Jones. So I think she said a working actor

She said he's a working actor. I think just like make out to brag like yes He is an actor because like there's definitely like some thirst going on this couple like last week when TJ was like Did you tell them about us you want you want to tell them you want to share about me? You want to share you want to talk make a storyline? Come on. So she's like, yes yes he's a working actor everyone look at his imdb it's actually really impressive so they do of course they look that imdb right up and she's like uh yeah well um uh okay well this is just the back of his head so we see the imdb and it's like days of our lives, Dr. Jim McGonigal. And Stacy's like, Oh, yeah, he's been on so many things. NCIS, ER. At one point, she goes, he's been to so many things, ER. And then she just paused. I was like, honey, ER has not been on the

air for 20 years. Come on. So Wendy's like, so he does like extra work? She goes, no, babe, not extra. Meanwhile, all the credits are like one episode, one episode, one episode, which hey, that is good. That is a dream for the actor. But we're like, let's not talk about him. Like he is the second coming of, you know, Richard Griego. Work is work, you know what I mean? And so Gisele's like, so when are you gonna see him if he's in LA? And she's like, well, he's going to come in this week. It's really important.

He just tries to come in every other week or so to make sure that I'm okay. He comes in so we can make sure we're not coming. So, um, so Gisele's like, so are you guys going to have sex? Ah, she's like, no, no, no, we, we haven't actually had sex. And just I was like, damn, but who said they didn't want to have sex? Ah, she's like, no, no, no, we, we haven't actually had sex. And just I was like, damn, but who said they didn't want to have sex? What was that like? She's like, we, we both decided we don't want to have sex.

And anytime we start to get horny, we just sit down and watch chicken run until the feeling passes. I mean, it's like she hasn't had sex because she's so stiff, okay. Have you felt around? Do you need to know what you're working with? What if it's like she hasn't had sex because she's so stiff. Okay. Have you felt around you? You need to know what you're working with. What if it's like a thumb? What if what's like a thumb, you know, his thumb is very much like a thumb. Just on the nose. Did I

just say that? His thumb is very thumby. It's an on the note. It's on the nose. Although his thumb is not usually on his actual nose. His nose is's on the nose. Although his thumb is not usually on his actual nose. His nose is also on the nose. I would say that everything is exactly the way it should be. Elbow to elbow. Unless I catch his nose, which turns into my thumb. I go, God, your nose turns into my thumb. I'm like, your nose is a thumb right now. But then I put it back on his nose and that's not a thumb anymore. That was our first fight. Our first fight was when I stole his nose.

He accused me of doing witchcraft and said that was paganism. I had to explain to him, it was actually just a very common thing that people do. And he still said you're a heathen and then, you know, we got through it eventually when I said I could put them on TV. He actually tried to have me burned, which is crazy. And they said the new administration hasn't taken office yet, but give it time. Yeah. That being said, we did do particularly well on QVC when we sold some steaks that you can burn

people at. I was like, my boyfriend tried to burn me at this steak and it was a wonderful experience. I think we sold out of that lot. Yeah. He said the stakes are high. I said, no, that's probably Mia, but if she is, she's gonna be on one of these stakes. So it all just kind of worked out. And then she deep throated the stake. It all was full circle. Can't crucify this bitch. That's why I got fired from QVC

because it happened live on the air and everyone was horrified. So Gisele's like, so have you sexually assaulted him and felt around? She goes, I would like to, but, well, can you do oral? And she's like, I don't know that he's really willing to do oral, you know, this is just very difficult, but you can direct your attention to other things.

The Bible, brain. going to the zoo. Where did that come from? She was like, yeah. Where? I'm horny, let's go to the zoo. Going to the zoo. And then she couldn't think of anything else. That's it.

She said, hey, that lady's at the zoo again. Is there something weird? Should we have her followed? What is she doing? Who is that lady doing flash dance next to the tiger cage? So I'm just putting her in a chair. So Wendy's like, how old is he? He's in his forties, 41. Nah. And you know, he has been waiting for a, for a wife all this time. And Giselle just starts cracking up because she's like, Oh, no. Yeah.

She does the whole, you better drive the car first thing. And Wendy's like, I'm just getting to know Stacey and I don't want to doubt up, but it's odd. It's, it's, it it's odd. Yeah, there's something fishy about this. I'm not believing it because it's not the whole religious thing because he's fucked plenty of people. She's already said that on the show. It's like he's reclaimed. When a man is reclaiming his virginity right when he starts dating you, there is an ulterior motives, period. I'm sorry. And he still hasn't fucked her. It's been years.

I mean, if it really was religious, he would say, then let's get married and then we can fuck. But this whole like, oh, it's just religious. No, you don't reclaim your virginity like that at 40. Give me a fucking break. No. So now they arrive at the joint and I have to give a shout out to our note taker, Jessica, who writes, they arrived at the joint with an exclamation point. Jessica is very excited about this. And you know what? I am too, because we were back at the joint and everyone's like, oh, well, we're at the joint. And Gisele's like, why are we going? Mia's like, well, I just want to show you guys like where I started. So they walk in to this random joint chiropractic and Mia literally goes, I'm here. I don't know you.

Of course, you don't know her because you haven't owned this joint in years. Like, what are you doing walking in like this is a high school graduation? The chiropractor is like, like these people, all they know is that they got a call from Bravo that was like, Hey, we want to shoot a scene from the real house as a Potomac at your joint chiropractic. Is that okay? They're like, uh, okay. I don't know why, but sure. Okay, fine. Uh, so she's like, yeah, I don't know you. And the guy's like, well, hi, I'm Dr. Chad. She goes, Oh, well, nice to meet. Oh, um,

my boyfriend actually played a Dr. Chad one time., Oh, well, nice to meet. Oh, my boyfriend actually played a Dr. Chad one time. Yeah. On St. Elmo's fire. Have you ever heard? Have you ever heard of that? It was a failed pilot a spinoff of the movie. Yeah, didn't really take off. Here's an I'm Dr. Chad. Nice to welcome to the joint and gay. It's like, well, we're actually selling all of our joints. We had 97 I'm Dr. Chad nice to welcome to the joint and gay. It's like well

We're actually selling all of our joints. We had 97 joints and we're selling them because The business partners couldn't get along which is mostly Gordon's fault And you know, this is where it started guys. This is the first place I ever cracked a bat. Are you one of the doctors? I am a doctor. I'm a doctor. Yes, I am a doctor. No, you're not. What are you doing?

Do you think Mia even had anything to do with this joint chiropractic? I don't, there's no- Maybe at one point. But again, she really is acting like owning a joint chiropractic is like, I don't know, owning a factory somewhere. I don't know. It's just like you're just a nameless franchise owner. And she's like, yeah, this is where we are. And this is sort of like my stomping ground. By the way, is Dr. McDaddy

is here? Where's Dr. McDaddy? And Dr. Chad is like, oh, he had to go up to Virginia. I was told I had to come up with an excuse. Because like, you know, Dr. McDaddy doesn't exist. He doesn't exist because Dr. Chad would just go along with the delusional lady, you know. This lady is with the lady who's always at the zoo. You know, she's got to be crazy. So just to go along. He's like, Dr. McDaddy.

So Mia's like, yeah, I no longer own this location with this one was one of my original babies. I still have 22 other locations that I'm going to be selling soon for concrete. I don't know. Her talking about the joint being one of her babies reminds me of what's her face being like. Like Donkey B. I'm like, please. It's just a joint character. I mean, they're all just standing there in the lobby. It's like cricket sounds.

And they're all just looking at each other like, okay. There's no tour of the office. There's none of that. It's just like, well, this is where it all started, ladies. Stripping taughtpping something. We're like, we're not. Hundreds of businesses and just all goes, so is this your busy time? Because there's nobody in there, you know, and nobody comes in the whole time. It's just like they're on like a tour of like a GM plant, like, like this.

I would say the Guinness Guinness Guinness Tour again, like this is where Guinness beer started a global sensation like, well, ladies, we are here. This is the joint care of rantic. This is where it all began. Uh, one of 13 franchises that we bought, just soak it all in. So Wendy is just like, this is not a good birthday thing. It's my birthday. So now they go to lunch and-

They don't even get adjustments, right? They don't even get their backs cracked. No, they just stand in the lobby for a minute and then decide to go to lunch. So they go to lunch and everyone gets a round of shots and cares like, oh, I'll have a coffee please. I'll have a coffee and I'll have that with cream and vermouth and vodka.

Please don't put any coffee or cream in that. Thank you very much. Would you like any soda pop? Pop, oh, flashback. Thank you very much. Would you like any soda pop? Pop! Flashback! So then, um, yeah. I got it. Pop is still dead somewhere. The end of this episode is going to be like

in loving memory of Pop. So, um, they order and then Gisele's like well, I came and I got downloaded on the tea from Jassy. So I want to make sure. Kierna, are you okay? They order and then Giselle's like, well, I came and I got downloaded on the T from Jassy. So I want to make sure, Kierna, are you okay? Yeah. I didn't like hearing that you were crying and all that. She's like, I was very upset, Ashley.

I was very, very upset. She's like, Ashley, would you like to apologize? I'm just reopening because it's fun for me. I could talk about my children going to college. Would anybody prefer that? It's like, no, no, okay, fine. We'll do this. We'll do this. But it's fun for me. I could talk about my children going to college. Would anybody prefer that? It's like, no, no. Okay, fine. We'll do this. We'll do this. But it's my birthday. We know Wendy. Again, I'm confused at how Giselle went to a graduation ceremony,

had a graduation reception, and then was able to get back to Lake Norman before lunchtime on the real house was a Potomac. This is really bothering me. before lunchtime on the Real House was a Potomac. This is really bothering me. So my only explanation is that the reception that Giselle and Jamal held for their daughters happened on a future date and they just edited it earlier. That's the only way this makes sense to me.

And I know this is a point that I think negative three people care about, but it's on my mind. And this is a form for honesty and transparency. All right, well, I hope that you one day get that figured out. Thank you. Thank you, thank you.

So they, Kieran is like, so Kieran is like, you know, Ashley says, well, I already said I'm sorry. And Kieran is like, well, that was just piggybacking off Mia, in my opinion. And I was very offended though, when you of all people dragging drug dealer, and Mia goes, why is it me of all people?

She goes, because you have a very colorful past yourself. She goes, I'm a colorful past, not in the drug industry. And she's like, well, strippers, drug dealers, I think they're kind of close. She goes, that's not the the drug industry. And she's like, well, strippers, drug dealers, I think they're kind of close. He goes, that's not the same thing, baby. It's legal, illegal, okay? Just, well, I never sold drugs, but it was obviously very pressing for you to bring it up.

And she's like, well, when you're a drug dealer, honey, it's kind of illegal. Being a stripper is not illegal. She goes, okay, well, selling ass is fine. Jack is like, not selling ass is fine. That's a prostitute and I am here to stay. And Mia's like, well, I called you on your shit and you didn't deny it. So, you know, it's a fact. She goes, okay, okay, okay. So what's my current man doing? And she goes like, I just, I was like, okay, we're going to move on. Okay. I didn't realize how annoying this fight

actually was. I shouldn't have reopened it. It was like, it was like, look at that security while you're posted on the corner. Mind that business. So, all right. So like my man's my man's got a real job now. So, yeah. And then Mia goes, oh, yeah. A quote unquote social worker. OK. OK.

What does that mean? Is social work code for something bad? But also like I think she's like dismissing it like like, oh, that's real impressive. He's a social worker. Wow. And you call yourself glamorous says the woman who just gave him a tour of the first joint chiropractic she ever opened up. So Jassy's like guys, I have an event. My man is being honored. And every year the Super Bowl winning team gets to go to the White House and I'm putting together a party. And I've made a huge

point to invite all of the single men. And we don't know if these single men will be from the Kansas City Chiefs, but I'm just going to suggest that they will. I mean, watch it just be random people from around the block. They're all going to show up thinking that they're going to suggest that they will. I mean, watch it just be like random people from like around the block. They're all going to show up thinking that they're going to be attached to a football player and then get to meet Taylor Swift and it's just gonna be some randos from Jassy's life. So Jacqueline's like, oh, I want to come because I'm like in my whole workout mode now. I've literally lost 15 pounds from last year, which is why I'm basically running this show now, am I right, girls? It just makes me feel strong, like don't fuck with me, potentially Karen, who might be listening to this right now. Giselle's like, oh, are you saying that to Karen? Because I heard there was a lot, do you guys want to fight again? Because I missed it. And Karen's like, no, I'm so busy dodging darts. I'm like this. Bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing.

I'm like a pedestrian in the 70s watching near a dodge dealership avoiding darts. Did that make sense to anyone? Or are you too young to understand that? Remember, she's like Wonder Woman. Do you remember that show? Just dodging things and she had underwear that were made out of metal.

I used to think, God, how does anybody get into those underwear? Be really nice. She figured that out would let us know. Sat there in the audience just watching that the other day. God, someone get my underwear off of me, please. It feels like metal. I've just been bing, bing, bing. That's right, Stacey. Keep reflecting. What I would give to have an invisible car. Karen, Karen could get out of that DUI. What? I wasn't driving.

I'm just merely walking and by walking slightly floating above the asphalt. There would be another charge. It would be like reckless endangerment driving an invisible car. Shame. Same on you. Drunk. Drunkenly. It's not invisible. It's Belvedere colored. It was Wonder Woman who had the invisible car, right? She had an invisible plane. Oh, what's the point of that? Invisible car. I mean, because she could fly country to country or she could, you

know, take on monsters and they wouldn't see her coming and stuff. An invisible car is way worse. People just talk about cars. A terrible concept. Yeah. That's a terrible, terrible, terrible thing to do. So then Jacqueline's. She kept it around it all the time. Let me tell you something. She would have permanent whiplash. And Jacqueline's like, well, I feel like there's a lot of ass kissing around here today. Okay. And now they're getting back in the sprinters and just, I was like, well, I feel like there's a lot of ass kissing around here today. OK. And now they're getting back in the sprinters and just I was like, well, I thought we're going to dinner tonight.

And they are. They're going to Charlotte's finest rooftop. Fahrenheit. Such a stupid. Why were you? Everything's like amusing me this time around. When I watched the episode, I was like, this episode is boring. But now as we go through it, everything is cracking me up. I love that someone was like, let's is boring. But now as we go through it, everything is cracking me up. I love that someone was like, let's build a rooftop bar in Charlotte

and we'll call it Fahrenheit because it has height in the name. And the Fahrenheit, we don't know what that has to do with anything, but it just seems fun. Let's go with it. It's really hot up here. I'm sorry, but it's called Fahrenheit.

You really get me complaining. I'm sorry, but it's called Fahrenheit. So you really can complain. I'm sorry. Americans only. If you have the metric system, you have to go to Celsius next week. I'm kidding. Oh my God. All those people who don't believe that 32 degrees is freezing. Okay. So now they're getting ready for dinner and Eddie and Wendy talk. We get to see Zoe, the puppy, very cute. And then Jazzy facehumps with her boyfriend and we can't really clear him.

He just sounds depressed. She's like, hi baby. How are you? He's like, it's okay, baby. Hi baby, how are you? It's okay, baby. So she can't hear him very well. And so she says, you know, just like last year, he doesn't have a contract and like he doesn't know when his team, like what team he's going to play for, you know, it's like being fired. It's like Jaclyn, you know, and I really want to be able to be available for him to talk if needed, but the signals are so horrible. The calls are not going through, baby. So this is a bad relationship because if you're freaking out that you can't talk because the signal is bad, that is the sign of a shaky ass foundation. Didn't we see this somewhere else? Where did we see this where

someone couldn't talk to the, couldn't like speak to the person that they needed to speak to because the reception was bad and it caused like a meltdown. Well, cause it just, it was obviously not the reception, but they just kept using that over and over. It's like they were the only person. Wasn't it on the Valley? They were like the only person that, sorry, but the reception was bad. I just, yeah, I was like, I need to get to good reception. Otherwise it's

gonna be, it was like, Oh, no, it was, uh, was it Southern charm? I don't know. Don't do this to me. So then, um, now they're just talking about the day and stuff. And she was Ellen asking her gossiping about the girl, the girls. And then Ashley was like, yeah, you know, the K and me, I think that did kind of catch me off guard. You know, just going at it about the girls. And then Ashley's like, yeah, you know, the K and me, I think that did kind of catch me off guard, just going at it about the scar. And she's like, so do you want me to tell you my good news?

And she goes, sure. She goes, okay, well, you know how I'm working on healing and thriving? And then we get a flashback to Ashley singing everybody her healing and thriving song. I think this is over. Healing and thriving, now I'm just surviving. Surviving, surviving, having cream cheese with chives.

Zing. Healing and thriving, at least my trunk is thriving. Okay, that's enough Ashley. We've changed all the lyrics to be about my my running with the coppers. So healing and thriving. That's enough Ashley. We've changed all the lyrics to be about my my running with the coppers So healing and thriving

Listen music isn't something that should take you 20 years to adjust to get it ready for the public We heard it. We don't need to hear it anymore. Okay, isn't it? You're not gonna do something to it that's gonna make it suddenly pop off the charts. Okay? It's over. Hailing and thriving is over. She's like, but I put an EDM, I put an EDM beat to it. So now it's like, healing and thriving and now. And Giselle's like, oh God, why did I start a leggings company with this idiot?

And she makes Giselle listen to it. And Giselle's like, oh, so EDM doesn't mean because it's not bad at all. And now she's like, well, it just means like girl power, so EDM doesn't mean because it's not bad at all. And now she's like, Well, it just means like girl power, you know, so now it's like girl power. Okay, that's enough. I don't know. She sings a bar in live. It just also healing and thriving with an EDM beat. I think that song already exists. It's called Rhythm is a Dancer. Okay, let's not act like you came

up with that melody. It's called Rhythm is a Dancer. Okay, let's not act like you came up with that melody. It's called Rhythm is a Dancer. Just listen. Just listen and you'll see. So she's finding herself because these past couple of months have been totally different. Instead of pretending to be married to Michael and doing whatever she wants, she's been pretending to be married to Michael

and doing whatever she wants. It's been really hard, guys. So now she's gonna put her song to an EDMB and it changed its life changing. Yeah, she has really leaned into what brings her joy and happiness as opposed to all those other seasons where she was working in corporate America

so upset with her day to day nine to five job that she famously had season after season after season. Just pushing paper around, going to meetings, doing big things as opposed to, I don't know, doing yoga, I don't know, doing more yoga, TikTok dances. I'm glad that she's finally leaning into what brings her happiness now. So now the girls are all gathering to go out and Mia's like,

everyone eight minutes. And Jacqueline says, Oh my God, somebody stinks. It's like stink pussy or something, right? Season three on its way. They're all checking Jacqueline smells Mia's crotch. Like it wasn't you. And even if it was you, I would never say so on TV because I am here to stay and I am not your sidekick, but I'll do whatever you need. So then they're just like laughing about this smell. I'm like, you know, girl code got to make sure my girls not smell like fish up in here. So then Karen's wearing like a small dress. Everyone's like, wow. She's like, I look like a hooker about to breastfeed. So anyway, they get in the Sprinter van.

Didn't really get that. So then they get in the Sprinter van and they get some housewives craziness going on. They decided to do something that we have never seen on these shows. And it's actually a nice breath of fresh air. They pay very much, very much, very fuck kill. So who would you like to take a ferry with? Who would you

fuck and who would you kill? Yeah. Um, and this went on for about 25 minutes. Yeah. I just went on and on and on and on and on. It was like listening to Ashley singing, happiness and thriving. Healing and thriving. Healing and surviving. So then they go to the restaurant, Fahrenheit, and Wendy's like, guys, it's my birthday, and I'm gonna remember this birthday forever.

And Karen's like, this was a good one. This was a good one. I mean, it was a lot better than my 2020, 22, 25, 55, 5, 4, 4, 4. I was basically just giving out phone numbers at this point. I'm all right. Carrie the one. So then Wendy is like, you know, I usually just celebrate this birthday with Eddie. And in adulthood, I have like not done a celebration where I've invited outside people, mainly because I also live two hours away from the rest of the cast. But what I also realized is I never felt like people would celebrate me.

And everyone's like, Oh, Wendy, why? Come on, Wendy. She's like, No, it's funny because you all met me when I was 35. And when you all met me, I just had a baby and I was so unsure of myself. Roll the footage of me being so unsure of myself and sad and me at 35. Never happened. I am a doctor. I've got four degrees. Wendy literally gives another speech. Okay. I'm so sick of Wendy giving speeches.

I love Wendy's. I think Wendy's having a great season, but goddamn. So she gives another big, long speech about how she's been through so much and all her businesses and all of her this and all of her that. And then Ashley's like, you know what? This is where they all start giving speeches back to her. Ashley's like, do you inspire me so much to be just like you? The way you, I don't know, quit your job,

quit the other job, quit the other job, then quit that other job. It's really inspiring Wendy. Wendy's like, thank you so much, Ashley. Thank you, thank you so much. Okay, birthday girl, It's my turn. I love where we are, specifically at Fahrenheit, looking at the beautiful buildings of Charlotte, but also in our relationship. It's been stale for some time.

Now it's rich and I'm here for all of it, whatever it actually is. And I'm glad that we've been able to save our jobs by pretending to enjoy each other. So then they joke about the vagina, flapping vaginas at each other. And Jacqueline's like, oh, so that did happen, huh? And Wendy's like, no, vaginas were not touched. Stacy says, wow, there's not a lot of women that I admire, Wendy, and I just have to say, I admire you. I love what you've been doing with your fries.

They're crispier than usual, and that tends to time getting used to, but they're delicious, and you can never go wrong with a Frosty. Am I right, ladies? Jassy goes, I think that you're brilliant, creative, altruistic, and inspiring. And she's all like, what's altruistic? What's going on? Where's the altruism coming from? And now she's, oh no,

she actually asked what does that mean? And as she goes, oh, it means that you keep others without expecting anything in return. And just I was like, okay. And Jassy goes, I had expectations when I met not only the group, but you as well. And you did supersede those expectations, Wendy. You were a big superseder. What is supersedes? What is supersedes? Is that like when you get a lot of seeds at the garden store?

So then Karen's like, you are a wonderment. Yeah, I've said it. Said it. Now that's not a word, right? No, that's that. I don't think so, Giselle, but it is fun to keep you on your toes, Giselle. You are a wonderment.

Now you take on so many challenges in your life and only do them a little bit before you move on to something else. That is a true wonderment. And you succeed in not succeeding. You're a sample of a platter of half-baked job ideas. Congratulations. I love that about you. You've been there for me. You've been there for me when I've been falsely accused by a traffic median of driving over it. So thank you for being a good friend. So then Kierna is like, I just hope God continues to shine his light on you and just keep doing what you're doing because you've always been the glue for everything that I've been through.

And for that, I love you. So did Kierna come on as Wendy's friend? I don't remember that. I don't know what that, well, you, you know, I guess, I mean, are they really close? When, when, when do you, well, Wendy was, remember Wendy was team Candace. And so she was really like, she took Kierna's side with the whole fight and everything. So maybe that's what that's about. So then Jacqueline is like, initially when I met Wendy, it was very rocky because she was basically looking at me like,

who are you? Okay. But there's definitely more warmth in you as opposed to, bitch, why are you here? And as you can see, I am here to stay. I'm not just a fly by night girl. I basically am going to be a real housewife. I'm already ready to start my iconic fourth season. So I don't know what your attitude was about because clearly I'm America's favorite. In conclusion, Wendy sucks. Okay, happy birthday. So now they toast to Wendy again.

And then Ashley is like, well, cheers also to Stacy opening up and giving us her man government name who has an IMDB. And Stacy is like, oh, I just feel like there's been so much focus on me. Well, we haven't talked about Jassy's man. Jassy, let's talk about your man. That sounds fun.

Like you are so shady. You're making it sound like you're being so sweet and she's just handing this girl over to the wolves. Yes. So Jassy is like, oh, well, see what happens when you give children liquor. Okay. I guess we're going to direct the shade at me. Anyway, I am so thankful that you did ask about Darius. Who does fuck me? Well, he's been the best thing that ever happened to me. And he is someone that I'm going to marry. And we've had some bumps in the road. The bumps are ages three and five. And we've gone through those bumps. And he's a great father to

two boys who were born within a range of one month to three years ago. And they were either there or they were already created before me. And the children are three and turned one a month ago. AC I'm like, wait a minute. What? She goes, yes. Well, so we were dating, but it wasn't really official. But then he had impregnated somebody and like, oh, so he was cheating on you? No, we weren't officials. So, okay. So you're putting up with a man and constantly cheating on you and having babies with other people because he's rich. Okay. Got you. Is it possible it went the other way around? Like he was cheating on the baby mama with Jassy? I feel like that could be a possibility. Yeah, she was like the other woman or something.

She's the other woman. Yeah, scandalous. But basically, you know, he's famous and he's rich. So he's gonna get away with that. And they're like, Oh, yeah, yeah, that's what it's like when you do when you date a sports guy. Yeah, it's just how it is. You know, like I've done it. Who said that they did it? Mia, because well, because the Jassie a couple years ago, when he and I were dating, she was maybe two or three months pregnant. So she was already pregnant before we even had sex and he did not know. And that was the delay in me knowing. And they're like, Oh, okay. And so Ashley, Ashley actually does successful math. She goes, so you've been together two years. The baby is one year old, the first baby. The gestation for a baby is nine months.

So they had to have been dating for three months prior to him conceiving the second baby. Another six months she finds out about the baby. So two plus two is not equaling four here. Yeah. And oh, Karen is the one who's like, oh yeah, I've seen this. I've been through this because I dated someone who was in the league and you know, he had two women pregnant at the same time and they happened to be twins, you know, and I dreamt about it. And then I saw the woman in my dreams and they're like, wait a minute, two sets of twins. I was like, no, don't interrupt her. I love her. Like, I know dream a dream. He was having babies with multiple people, twins even. And then it turns out he was having twins with multiple people. Like, I need to know this side of her, and they just, like, totally shove it under the rug.

I know. She's like, there were twins. It happened to be that there were twins, and then they were switched at birth. So then one set went up to New York City. One stayed in Jupiter Hollow, but then the one set in New York City, they had to actually buy the hospital from Jupiter Hollow.

And so then later on in life, the ones from Jupiter Hollow had to go to New York. Like, Kierna, I think it was not a dream. I think it was not a dream. I think you just, you just watch big business. So then Kierna's like, yeah, so it was two people pregnant at the same time. That's all I'm going to say. And for me, I couldn't do that. I just couldn't get past it. Which pregnancy did it for you? The first or the second? How many kids were here before Kierna was like, I'm out of here.

Kierna has dated had a very interesting dating life. My God. She's dated. Is that a guy who's had two sets of twins with two different women while he was dating her and a drug dealer girl? What app are you on? It sounds like a I know. Mia's like, can you tell me what team he played for? He was straight. No, I mean, like actual team. Oh's like, can you tell me what team he played for? He was straight.

No, I mean like actual team. Oh, just leave me alone, Mia. She was like, no, tell me what team you played for because that sounds really fucking familiar. I say that because the same thing happened to me. So I'm just trying to make sure it's not the same guy. Is it the Ravens? And everyone's like, oh, not the Ravens.

And Kino's like, no, he played for Jesus at this point. And bottom line is if you date any form of a successful man, you should be prepared. And it just sounds like even if he's not successful. Yeah, you should be prepared. I met a pre, I was married to a preacher and he was still pulling the shit. Okay. He just impregnated a like very young parishioner like two years ago. So I get it, okay? At least yours caught balls, okay? Mine just catches confessions. So Ashley is like, you know what, we support Jassy.

This is not a conventional relationship, but I think it's true we're learning that not a one size fits all for everybody, which is my way of saying, you stop giving me about Michael Darby. Cause you all are in relationships. Yeah, exactly. So then, um, just I was like, Oh, that just means he was cheating on you, girl. Okay. It's okay. You know, just say that he cheated on you and you still want to be with him.

Just say that I had a dating Jamal storyline just, just last year. Okay. We've all been there. So Stacy's like, I would like to make a toast. Well, to toast really, because isn't it wonderful? No one really thinks toast enough, but it's really always there for me. Also Ashley Darby, God, who was married to a man who looked like toast. Ashley, you are just so inspiring. The way that you are so upfront and honest about everything makes me want to be as upfront and Honest about everything as you are which is why I'm not telling any of you bitches anything. Thank you You know, thank you're giving me the courage to be a little bit more open about talking about my life

And I'm a little bit more open and then I'm a little bit more closed I actually opened the door door a little bit. Ied in, I saw what was going on in the room, and I just closed it. So that was fun. You guys got all you need. So then they toast to her, and you know, Stacy is like thinking about how being a single mother and all that entails,

you know, it should be crazy not to ask these women who've had so many different life experiences how they've met it. So then more food arrives, they all have fun, they all go back home. And they're gonna go back and. And Jacqueline Kueh already tried to be funny. She was like, Oh my god, stink ass pussy. Am I right? And they just look at her. And now she's like, yeah, we need to go back. And then you guys need to shower because some of you guys really stink.

It's a good one, right? They just all look at her like, shut the fuck up, man. Who is this? Can someone please let the staff at Fahrenheit know that when I said I'm here to stay, I didn't mean the actual restaurant. Okay, I know I'm going to break some hearts. That's what they call me a heartbreaker. I am here to stay though. So everybody's leaving and they're like kind of bored at this point because you know, it's been kind of boring. So they're getting up and grumble, grumble. And then Wendy goes, Hey, but guess what? Not only am I 40, am I 40? I got four degrees. And then she does that cackle and everyone's like, Oh God, shut up. Please just shut up. So they leave. And then we wake up and

Wendy is just like, boom boom, like she just looks like she ran into a brick wall. You know, she's like, I just, I went to bed at three. And then we see blurry footage of the night before people party and Stacey's like, hi everybody. I did morning shows. So I was used to being up in the morning. I feel great. How are we? Yeah. And everyone just looks like a mess. And then they're talking about Jassy and, um, you know, like they're saying, like Mia is saying, how like, Oh, well, no one wants to be the other girl. I see it as someone who was the other girl. Um, and then Jacqueline's saying that Jassy and Darius are going to be getting a house together. And Mia's like, so I was assigned peace. I got a house. I like, she's like, no one wants to be other girl, but I did get a house

out of it. And Jacqueline's like, Oh, this is giving me goosebumps. So then Giselle is checking in with Wendy and Karen's like, well, even though Mia stuck as a hostess, this trip helped me have something other to do than think about my court case. So for that, I am grateful. And basically, they're like, wow, that was fun. That was fun. Let's go home. And they go home.

And that was it for our little trip to Lake Norman. And now we return back to Potomac next week, but Karen will have to face the truth. Bitterness of that court case. Well, we'll see what happens. And in the meantime, thanks everyone for being here, for listening, and we will catch you on the next episode. Bye everyone.

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