Watch What Crappens - #2652 RHOSLC S5E13 Part One: Room Doom

Episode Date: December 12, 2024

This is part one of a two-parter!The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City head to Mexico with a PowerPoint presentation and a lot of acrimony about room assignments. Will Bronwyn get more offended than she did last week, the week before that, or the week before that? And who will get clobbered with a bag of shampoo? To watch this recap on video, listen to our Sold on SLC bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Tickets for the Mounting Hysteria Tour are now on sale at watchwhatcrappens.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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bright creatures by Shelby van Pelt. Find what piques your imagination. Sign up for a free 30-day Audible trial and your first audiobook is free. Visit audible.ca to sign up. Watch what craps, oh, I need more food. Watch what craps, guess what happens. But there's so much that happens. Hello and welcome to Watch What Craps. A podcast for all that crap we love to talk about on Ye Olde Braves. I'm Ronnie. That's Ben. Hello, Ben. Hi, Ronnie. How are you? Good.

What's going on with you over there? Um, you know, it's one of the best days of the week because we get to talk about Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and the best. The best. I was at the best. The best. The best. The creme de la creme. As the girl from Salt Lake City, the Salt Lake City show says, the creme of the cremes. Yes. I was at board game night last night,

and you texted me, and you're like, how does this show do it every single week? I was like, I hadn't watched it yet. And I was like, oh, I'm so excited. So excited for Salt Lake City. I was just dying laughing. I mean, after last week, I thought, well, you can't really top that Butt-Mits for episode.

And they've already had so many good episodes. I'm, you know, I'm just kind of in that mood where I'm like, well, you know, we get what we get. It was a good year. Let's, like, see whatever they do for the rest of the season. But goddamn, that was funny. I was... I was so, so good. Well done, show. You know what else is gonna be so, so good?

The golden crappies of 2025. So true. Which is coming up next month. We just had a meeting with a musical director. If that tells you. I mean, what a talented person. There was gonna be so much cool shit happening this year at the Golden Crappies because we are on Broadway,

be-ah-ch! So we're gonna be at the town hall February 1st. Get your tickets now. You can find those at watchwhatcrappens.com. And guess what else? There's tickets for our mounting hysteria tour, which begins in January and is gonna go for a few months all over America and a little bit of Canada.

So go check that out over there. We still have some more cities coming. We're announcing Texas and Charlotte links next week. We've got Vegas links coming up soon. Not sure when, but very soon. And other cities that we might add later, Because it's our prerogative. And we're just going to go as many places as we'll have us. So thanks for that.

Also, bonus episodes right now are sold on SLC recaps over on Patreon. And that's also where you get our videos, like this one. You can get them right when they're released, or you can get them for free by waiting a week and going to join our YouTube, which is free. So, you know, if you when they're released or you can get them for free by waiting a week and going to join our YouTube, which is free. So you know, if you don't want to pay girl, I don't blame you.

You don't have to. Okay. We're here for all levels of financial stability, Ben or financial wants. If you're being foreclosed on, don't worry. We accept you. Yeah. I don't mean it like that. I just mean, you know, spend it or don't spend it. You know, we love you either way.

The most important thing is you're here right now. You're letting us into your little ear canals. We're in there. Get that eardrum ready because we're banging on it. Yeah, so we're really excited. It's gonna be a really exciting 2025. So excited for those crappies Broadway, we're gonna do it up this year. It's gonna be big. So but you know, who else is doing it up in Salt Lake City? As we mentioned, I was so happy earlier this week,

I was reading an article because it's December. And this is the time when all the newspapers and magazines start coming out with their top 10 lists. And so, you know, the New York Times, those are lists of best TV of 2024. And of course, it's all prestige TV, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, totally, you know, not including all the wonderful reality TV that's out there. And I, you know, you know, me, I firmly believe reality TV provides as compelling narratives and comedy as anything you might find on FX or HBO, yada, yada, motherfucking yada. So every, but I always read these top 10 lists and I, I, it's like, almost like I do it to get mad because I know that like they sure sell are

not going to include reality and if they do, they do kind of like predictable reality, like Drag Race, which no shame, no shade to Drag Race, but like, you know, Drag Race wins the Emmy almost like every year. So it's like a thing that like people who are not reality fans are like, they feel okay dabbling in that. So I'm always like, ah, the snobbery. And then then Vanity Fair had one. It's like, you know, best reality of the year. I was like, oh, now let's do a Vanity Fair says the fuckers are gonna be you know, best reality of the year. I was like, oh, now let's do a Vanity Fair says the fuckers are gonna be loving the bear. They're gonna love the bear. And the bears nominated for comedy already

to get their survivors award. They're gonna be say succession somehow. Although I like succession, but like they're gonna, I was like, I'm just ready. And guess what? Vanity Fair ranked this season of Salt Lake City amongst the prestige TV of Best TV of 2024. So I have to say, that was my long-winded way of saying, how good is this season? Even Vanity Fair is appreciating it.

And finally, Vanity is fair, because that... that makes some damn sense, Vanity Fair. Well done. Well done. They also, by the way, they also included the Traders. So Vanity Fair, honestly, on trend. You know, they had a stumble with the redemption, I mean, reality reckoning, I should say. But you know what, they're back on, back on board. Well, actually, speaking of that,

the reality reckoning is on board as well. It's not on board, but it's still alive, because Mark Garagos and his team released today that they are making headway with Love is Blind and a court has decided that the Love is Blind cast is now considered employees of the network. So it means a lot different ways of being treated and all this stuff.

So that actually, you know what? Bethany's over there like, reality marketing. And Bethany is also just dissed Harry's sauce. I mean, there's so much going on. So actually we'll talk about that on Monday. Cause that's gonna be our final Crappy Hour of the year. And that was not meant to veer

into another commercial about us, but Crappy Hour is our live weekly, bi-weekly show. It's so fun. It's 5.30 Pacific time over on YouTube live. And we also stream it on Instagram when we can. So check us out. You'll love it. Okay, let's get into So Like City.

Okay, well, we are in Post Bat Mitzvah. We are here at Meredith's house. She's in the kitchen with Seth, Brooks, and Chloe, and she's smelling different fragrances for her future bath bomb. different fragrances for her future bath bomb. And, um, we have to stop. I'm so sorry. This is important. This is important. Okay, so sorry about that, everybody. Sorry, Christina. I just told Christina this morning, we're gonna make your life easier from now on.

We're gonna try and get our audio right, blah, blah, blah. And then I do that. Okay, so here's what happened, why I had to stop the show. Look what I got yesterday. Ooh. What is it? What does it say? It's a handmade lush.

I don't care, send me shit, I don't care. If you saw my address. Okay, look at this, it says. Cosmetics. Handmade fresh cosmetics. I was like, what the fuck is that? Is it my summer gluteids? Is it like lipstick made out of cupcakes?

I don't know, I'll use that. But then I opened it and then I thought, oh my God, my... Because, you know, I make the crappy awards every year for the golden crappies. And I thought, oh my God, somebody's sending me a prototype of this year's crappy. Let me show it to you.

Look at that. It's a little poop emoji. Like a crappy, right, Ben? Doesn't this look like a crappy? Well, guess what it is. a little poop emoji, like a crappy, right Ben? Doesn't this look like a crappy? Well, guess what it is. It's a dumpling. It is Meredith Marks. Oh.

Lush bath bombs and beauty. I am thrilled to partner with Lush, the original creator of the bath bomb, to bring an exclusive new product. Just as I cherish my bath, I approach my business collaborations with the same level of seriousness and intention and partnering with a world-class brand like Lush, which embodies soul and purpose, aligns perfectly with my core values, side Alibaba.

And it's Meredith. And it came with this, which is called the French kiss. So I think I'm just missing the little paper that makes us a Hershey's kiss. Okay. And then it comes with this thing, this commingle body scrub. And then it comes with another little snowflake bath bomb thing. Beautiful. I'm gonna try and snort that later and see if that works. And then, um, another little thing. Uh, happy hippie shower gel. So anyway, thank you, Meredith. I have never been more excited to get a thing.

And also, we should partner with Lush to do the Crappy Awards this year, so I don't have to do it. So thanks and congrats on Lush. Everybody go find Lush. You can find it. I don't know. I think you just have to search for it. You could scan this thing, but it says, join us on at Lush, at Lush North America on Pinterest. The other one's YouTube at Lush.

So congratulations. Congratulations, Meredith Marks on your bath bombs that look not unlike a poop emoji prototype. I mean, what a way to end the year. Meredith Marks just sent us a golden crappy shaved bath bomb. I mean, come on, what a fucking gift. That is a dream.

She is, I mean, God, I love Meredith and it really makes me sad when Meredith and Angie fight because I want them to be friends. And I'm hoping that this, what happens at the end of this episode sticks. Oh my God, I hope they're never friends. I love it. I want them to be friends.

I love it. I love it. I love their discord. Okay, so you're right. So we're at the house. It's all the whole family's there, except the one who doesn't like to talk. Seth, Bess, and Chloe are all there. And Meredith is smelling things and being like, what do you like better?

The smell of the smell of the smell of the smell of that. And Brooks is like, this one smells like the four seasons. She goes, so does that mean you like it? And he's like. No. All right. Well, here's a woods fragrance. They want to try a woods fragrance.

And Chloe's like, what are you doing with all these scents? Well, they are going in the bath bombs and all the bath products. And maybe even they're going to scent a little bubble bath for my toddler. And Seth is like, all right, well, I'm still totally stuck on your bat mitzvah. Can we talk about bath?

We can talk about bath time bombs anytime you want. Like what the hell happened? Well, what set me off was when Brooks, you came up to me and said, mom, you should probably see what's going on with Rattney because she's crying. And then one minute later she comes walking in and I can see she has been crying and she was very visibly shaken up. And I said, what's going on? And she said, she keeps slut shaming me. I will not have hate at my bottom as far as slut shaming is hate. I was like, oh, for Christ's sake. Oh my God.

I'm just... There'll be no slut shaming at the Bat Mitzvah. You know, Angie's behavior has been despicable. She can sit and cry that she was thrown out of a religious event and when she shamed other women, but I don't know why Angie is so consumed with Brittany's sex life. I think it's weird. And leave her alone.

Angie continually hits below the belt. It's mean girl behavior. It's triggered the hell out of me. I'm not down for it. I am not down for it. Now, of course, she wasn't, I mean, you know, Angie was screaming at her a lot. It's hard to stand up for Angie sometimes,

because like, obviously she was in the wrong on a lot of stuff. But I think the point was that Brittany is acting like she's so offended after she's walking around talking about all the dudes she's dating. But then if somebody else says anything, she just picks and chooses when she's going to be upset for TV, basically. You know? She's doing it very well though, I have to say.

I know that Brittany is very polarizing with the audience, and even with me, because I saw her on Instagram the other day and she was on Watch What Happens, and she's just like, every time I see her, she's annoying. You know, every time I see her, I'm like, oh, God, shut up. I mean, I didn't even listen to what she was saying on Instagram. I just saw her like waving around some lipstick

and like, you know, doing this sort of thing in the camera, and I just flicked through and rolled my eyes. Now that said, I was very excited to see what Brittany was gonna do today on this show. Because she's just such a twit, you know? Yeah, I've really grown to enjoy Brittany. In the beginning, I was like, oh, gosh, she's just trying so hard.

She's trying to really get that snowflake and it's just like all over her. But it's actually become the defining feature of her personality. I used to see that as a flaw, and now I see that as a feature. That she is so thirsty and desperate, and that she never quite gets the attention that she feels like her moment deserves,

which is why she's always making announcements. She's always making fucking toasts. To herself. So, then we go over to Angie and Sean talking about this, and she's still, you know, upset, of course. She's like, that was a fun night. I am so glad I went out of my way too. And he's like, uh, how do you feel about it?

Just tell me how you feel, babe. That's why I live a city from you, okay? That's why I sleep a city block away from you. I'm here for you. I am pissed. You know, I felt like you and I went there with great intentions. Like, I went and congratulated her, and I went in with an open mind, an open heart, an open Acropolis. And I mean, she invited her to us to her bat mitzvah, which, you know,

you don't just invite anyone to that, right? I'm like, have you been to a bat mitzvah? Have you been to a bar mitzvah? Anybody with a wallet? Welcome. Well, okay. This is okay. It's the same as like the same as we did. When you come of ages and we when we have our 15 year old party at the church, we're like, who's got a wallet? Get in here and donate some money to me.

Praise Jesus. This is okay. This is like, okay, well, okay, so we're going to have like my cousins and everything and like, oh, and then also, well, you know, then it's like your dad's law partner and your dad's law partner is dentist. And it's like every, like, well, we have to invite the Rosenbergs.

Who are the Rosenbergs? I don't know, but we feel like we should invite them. Like it's a lot of people get bar and bat mitzvah invitations. In my school growing up, it was like, you had to invite the whole class in fact, actually I didn't invite the whole class, but there were a lot of them, it was like, you had to invite the whole class, in fact. Actually, I didn't invite the whole class. But there were a lot of them where it was like, like everyone, because I went to a small school

for middle school, so it was like 50 people in the class. So you just blanket invite 50 kids right there, even if you don't like them. So, Angie, welcome to Bar and Bat Mitzvah land. Yeah, you invite anybody you can to a Bar Mitzvah. Or any teenage thing where there is like, you donate money to the child, I will invite everybody. I'm like, Dad, didn't you go to high school with people?

Give them a call! Baby needs a new pair of shoes. -♪ BOTH LAUGHING. -♪ BOTH LAUGHING. Unfortunately for me, we had a lot of cheap people come to ours. I mean, there were a couple $20 bills, I guess, in that gift pile, but there was... I've talked about this before, but one gift I will never forget was I got a book called If God Loves Me, Why Can't I Get My Locker Open?

God did. To quote Whitney Rose, God did that. I was so annoyed. I was like, throw this away. My mom was like, you're not throwing that away. That is, that is, that is like anti-Christ behavior. You're gonna keep that as a Christian book. And I was like, I'm not reading that. She said, you don't have to read it, but you have to keep it on your shelf so that other people think that you've read it. Okay? You don't have to be a good Christian,

but you better let other people think you're a good Christian. I was like, okay, geez. I had that book, like, till I was 20. I mean, till long after I'd moved out of my house. I just kind of kept it. So I was like, what if people see this on my shelf? You know? What event was this for, by the way? It's not a cat... It's not catechism.

What is it called? It's like your coming of age party. Confirmation? Confirmation. Yes, yes, confirmation. Yeah. It was my confirmation. I was like, it's not your bar mitzvah, right? We didn't have to go to Hebrew school. We did have to go to Bible school and stuff, but then we had to serve time as acolytes

and like carry stuff down the aisle in the procession and stuff like that. Did you find any Michelin star restaurants? It was not in Bogota or whatever. It was, you know, I did get to go to Juarez a couple of times, but that was mostly after hours and getting drunk. That was not true. True schedules. Okay, any sanctions. Okay, anyway, so Angie is like, well, you know, I have not stopped crying since Meredith kicked me out of her event. It was cruel. It was dis-meaning. Obviously, she is harboring old feelings. And so she's just...

She's so upset that she was kicked out of a spiritual event in front of her mother, in front of her children, in front of the oil change guy. You know, honestly, I would be crying too if I got kicked out before I got to see Meredith Marks hoisted up in a chair in the middle of the horror. So, yeah, I would be sobbing. I'd be like, wait, that's the main attraction.

Whoa! Whoa! Okay, now this... Okay be like, wait, that's the main attraction. Whoa, whoa. Okay, now this, this, okay, you okay, put the chair down. Okay, you want to talk about the chairs, we can talk about the chairs. Like seem like I was imagining those kids, especially broken Chloe being hoisted in the chairs and just how blase they'd be like, wow, we're in a chair. That's cool. My chair is moving. This is unsafe. Can you put me down now? Thanks.

You've got great arm strength. I thought it was really funny when she's like, well, I mean, Heather's plastic surgeon was there, so maybe that's why she invited us. Like, she doesn't have any friends. So, she's like, how in the hell am I supposed to go to Puerto Vallarta with her? Because you're thirsty. You're thirsty as the rest of them. Don't act like you're not going to go to Puerto Vallarta. Come on.

Yes. Girl, you're about to get into a shampoo fight. Okay, so get ready. Buck up. You're about to do something that no housewife has ever done, which is throw two bottles of shampoo across the table at dinner, which is normally don't even have that prop available for dinner. So, you know, get ready. It's gonna be iconic for you. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crap ens commercial. Have you ever wondered who created that bottle of Sriracha that's living in your fridge or why nearly every house in America has at least one game of Monopoly?

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Apple Podcasts, or Spotify. Start your free trial today. So then back at Meredith, Chloe's like, well, honestly, what sent me was when Sean was like, Meredith, listen to both sides. And then we cut to Sean going, Meredith, you should listen to both sides. And then we cut to Sean going, Merida, you should listen to both sides, Icon. Love you. Turn around.

You don't have to pose for a selfie, but I can get us both in here. If you can't see yourself, I can't see you. Where are you going? Merida! I was like so mad. I was like... It was embarrassing how mad I was. So then. I was like... Ugh. It was embarrassing how mad I was. So then... So then Meredith's like,

well, you know what? They spew lies. They gaslit me over and over again about the comments about you, about the comments about my hearing aids, about the comments about my white bean salad, and she's coming to celebrate me, and she makes fun of my impairment. And then she, it doesn't really,

we see the flashback to Angie going, you need to, I need to get hearing aids like you or something or check your hearing aids or whatever. And Samara is like, really? My disability? That's what she's coming for? And Brooks goes, girl, it's not a disability, it's what she's coming for!" And Vrix goes, "'Girl, it's not a disability. It's your superpower.'"

Yes, Quinn! See, Sean gets it. So, it's like... It's an enhancement. Yeah. It's just like chic. Chic. Your, like, your phone, I mean, hearing aids are like, so in right now. So then back at Angie's, it's a different time now.

And Mary comes and she's knocking on the big glass door and there's nobody there. So she knocks again and there's still no one. It's her new thing. It's her new thing, being outside of a window and knocking. Just put Mary in front of some glass and watch her go. They unlocked a new achievement for Mary. She does great prop great proper windows. So she just lets herself in because

she knows she can because she sees the camera on the other side of the window. So she goes in and then she just sits in this house. And like, you know, we've always commented on Angie's house being really, really white and sterile. But you I felt like I really appreciated it even more. Like, I really felt it. Just seeing Mary sitting in there, and no one else was there, and just this big, white room.

It looked like a padded cell or something like that. But like, the only pops of color come from these really cheesy, like, photo to canvases all over the place. Then there's like one of Angie with like a tiger. It's just such a bizarre space. It really is. And I think she's added some color because she got made fun of last year.

So there's like little blobs of pink everywhere now. Yeah, like blue, little blue elements, like this IKEA cup I'm holding. It's like this color randomly. It's like Mary's house, you know, in level one. Before it just, like by the end, it's like, what's that video game where you just splatter paint all over everything? I forget what it's called.

Splatoon? Yes. Something like that? Yes. So Angie comes and she gets scared, you know? And she's like, oh, I was getting ready for you. Make yourself at home. I'm working in the kitchen. So she brings out some charcuterie. And Mary's like,

well, I probably won't be eating anything because I don't have an appetite, but it looks beautiful. And she's like, oh, so you know what you're going to have to help me do is a comic bit where we open up champagne. And so they don't know how to open up champagne. And we see a flashback of them like two weeks ago not being able to do it, but now they're gonna do it again.

And it was so funny. They're trying to open it and there's two of them trying to get it off and they go, let's just have some water. Yes. Can't they literally put it down and go get water? So then- It was like watching the entire Marx family

slicing a lemon together. Yeah. Except they at least got the lemon slice. These two just gave up, but this time they did. I know. Which was nice. Yeah. Except they at least got the lemon slice. These two just gave up. But this time they didn't. Which was nice. So then, um, now they're like talking about, oh my gosh, how do you pour this? And you know.

I'm like, I'm sort of shocked that they were so inept with the champagne, especially Angie. I feel like Angie should know her way around a champagne glass, but she really didn't. One important thing in being independent is at least know how to make your breakfast. Yes, thank you. Also, honestly, if you're working in a salon,

you should be pouring glasses of champagne to the bougie ladies, right? Isn't that like what we've learned from these shows? That when you go get your hair done, you get a glass of champagne with it? I don't think salons that use sulfites do that. Thank you for pointing that out. It's so bad. If you cared about me, you would know that I can't have champagne with carotene in my hand.

I was so embarrassed for her. So they pour the champagne and then Mary says she's been having a rough day and Andrew's like, did you really? What's going on? Cause Mary doesn't tell her. She's cause I had a rough day and then Andrew just nods and looks's going on? Because Mary doesn't tell her. She's just goes, I had a rough day. And then Angie just nods and looks at her to talk,

but Mary doesn't talk. So Angie's like... So what? What is it? So then Mary goes into it, and of course, the salties start immediately squirting. Oh my God. Oh my God.

Yeah, and it was actually more... It was actually, she was talking about Robert Jr. She tells Angie that he's on drugs and everything. I didn't realize that heroin was in the mix last time, but now we know that there's heroin, and it's just so devastating. Well, there was a lot that people, you know,

reading comments about the scene from last week, you know, being on Reddit or whatever, and reading all the comments, it was interesting reading them because, you know, there are a lot of and reading all the comments. It was interesting reading them because, you know, there are a lot of people who thinks this is just, who think that this is just wrong because he really doesn't have consent, because if he's high, then that's not really showing consent. And, I mean, all of this, I don't necessarily agree with that.

But they were saying, like, shame on Bravo for showing this. And, you know, there's like that element of people who are mad. You know, obviously, right to your opinion or whatever. Like, there's a lot of sensitivity about it out there. I don't personally share that, but, um, they were like, this is so insensitive of them. And it looks like Bravo actually was kind of sensitive

and cut a lot of it out. Because Mary's retelling it, of it is like, you know, you know how when your kids, you know your kids are acting weird. And Angie just kind of looks at her. She goes, you know when they're kids, you know your kids are acting weird, and Angie just kind of looks at her. She goes, you know when they're not telling you something, or when they're being quiet, or when they're hiding something from you.

And Angie's like, well, no, like I literally, I can pull up my phone and show you what Electra's doing right now. Like she just rolls her eyes at me a lot. , but Mary's like, no, no, I asked him what he was doing. And he told me a boy, did he tell me, and then she starts listing all the stuff he was doing. And it was like, Wow, and yeah, heroin's in there. And he's like, Yeah, you know,

because I tried this, I tried that. And then, you know, that led to other drugs like heroin, and then Xanax and acid. And Angie's very dialed in. I was... I really appreciated the way Angie was there for Mary, actually. Also, Angie did the move that I enjoy, which is when she puts her hand slowly on her heart. I like when she does that. She does like a slow hand thing right here. She did that last year or two during a scene.

And I don't know why I enjoy that. But it was such an emotional scene. And Mary, what was also emotional was Mary's interviews that were cut through it. And she's like really sobbing on camera. And she's just like, she's beating herself up. She's like, what did I do wrong? How did I not see this? How did I not secure him enough

to show you notice his self-worth? She's talking about how he says, how he felt like he's a stain. And she's like, I prayed to God for four months that I could, you know, I worked for four months to try and have you, like, I prayed for you to come here and for you to feel like you're a stain when you're like the answer to my dreams.

It's just like, it was just gut wrenching all over again. Yeah, so, um, I think Angie says the right things here, which is she just listens mostly. And then the only pushback she really gives is like, I think Angie says the right things here, which is she just listens mostly. And then the only pushback she really gives is like, you know, you don't, this isn't about who's fault it's like, it's not your fault. It's addiction. That's a disease, you know? Yeah. And, um, you could do everything right and still have this happen, you know?

And so Mary's not sure if she's going to be able to come to Mexico because of Robert, like she has to make sure Robert's good. And, um, so that's that. And she basically says, you know, and, Angie, I'm confiding in you. And she goes, this stays between us. Pinky promise. Which... I really hope that is... I hope she doesn't do the real housewife thing, which is immediately going to everybody,

being like, guys, Mary's under the weather. Be nice, because her son's on heroin. Okay? Exactly. I hope it does not become fodder, because it's, like, guys, Mary's under the weather. Be nice, because her son's on heroin. Okay? Exactly. I hope it does not become fodder, because it's like too real. It's not like some bullshit about Starbucks cups. Um, but it was just honestly, it was a beautiful scene. And I was like, I was also like,

I know this episode's gonna go crazy, because Ronnie texted me and said, this episode's so funny. So I was like, I love that they're like, okay, we're gonna have a really funny episode, but first, we're gonna make you cry, And now we're gonna make you laugh. Okay. Yeah, they do it. Like only this show could do it. Like the show does it so well. It can pivot like that. Yeah. So then everybody's packing.

Whitney's packing a pink bathing suit and cover up and stuff. And she's like, well, I just need to find a pink bra and pink underwear. And Justin's like, isn't that a swimsuit cover? She's, oh my God, that would go with pink. Good thinking. He's like... Yeah. I've spotted two pink things and pointed at them to go together.

Wow. Wow. So then three days later at the airport, Heather's like, I'm really excited for this trip. I think I'm pretty good with everybody and I have no bones to pick. And with airport security everywhere, everyone seems to be on their best behavior. And they do a little thing about how like,

who hates who and everything. And, you know, she's like, you know, Angie and Brittany can't stand each other. Meredith and Angie aren't even speaking. And Whitney and Lisa basically hate each other. Thanks, TSA. We're off to a great trip. So then, I never know what she's talking about. Sometimes I'm like, what are you even talking about?

What is the TSA doing? Um, so... Nothing. So Bronwyn is like, oh, wait, girls, do I have a gift for everybody? I do. I do. Girls, everybody stop, do I have a gift for everybody? I do, I do. Girls, everybody stop, I've got a gift for you. Thank you, gifts.

And she bought them all Diamond passport covers. And they're like, oh my God, so cute. And Lisa's like, that's this weird. Because Bronwyn called me to ask if she could bring something. Flashback, one week earlier, Bronwyn on the phone with Lisa. Should I bring something for the girls? Like, I should get a little gift for the girls, right?

You doing something? I should, right? And she's like, you know what? I got a gift for everybody, so I just want you to show up. She's like, okay. And then she shows up with gifts. Yeah, I think Bronwyn's mistake was saying it to Lisa, because if she just showed up with these passport things, passport holders, I don't think it like... it's just like cute little tchotchkes.

It's not like a thing. It's not stepping on anyone's toes. But if she then, if she ahead of time says to Lisa, should I bring something? And Lisa says, no, don't bring something, but then you bring something anyway, now it's suddenly poor form. But the truth is this, at the end of the day, these are like tchotchkes, like maybe like each one is $12 or something like that. Honestly, they really should be like $3.

But like they're tchotchkes. And if this is going to step on Lisa Barlow's gift, makes me wonder what Lisa's Barlow gift is going to be. **Jadey** Yes. So then, let me see here. **Jadey** I'm looking for a gossip article. **Jadey** Well, she hands out the passport holders. **Jadey** Because so she passes out the holders and then she talks about how she was attacked by a dog.

And, um... She's got bruises and bites all up her leg and her arm. It is crazy to see how badly this dog attacked her. Like, it is not good. It is really, really bad. And she's like, Yeah, I'm doing better. I got some stitches. Now I've got to go to Mexico. But you know what was super weird about it

is the gossip that's been going around about this couple, which hasn't been that much, surprisingly. But, um... Well, one of them is that they were separated for a while, you know, so that's been going around on the old internet. And I'm reading this on All About the T. But, uh, this was from the US Sun, I guess, originally. But court documents obtained by the US Sun

reveal that Bronwyn and Todd lived in separate states between 2016 and 2018, with him residing in San Francisco, her in Park City. The arrangement came to light after a lawsuit was filed against the couple following a 2016 incident where their boxer dog allegedly attacked a woman. Isn't that crazy? There's like a lot of dog attack things around Bronwyn and Todd.

And by the way, I'm not like, I have no conspiracy or anything. I just thought it was odd that that came up on the show and she was the one who was attacked. Because I had read the other stuff about their dog attacking somebody allegedly. Wow. Are you saying there may be a conspiracy where it was actually she was attacked by her dog? No. I'm just saying, no, no.

I really have no conspiracy. I just thought it was weird that I just read about that the other day. And so when I heard dog attack was coming on the show this week, I thought it was gonna be someone being like, oh, really? Take care of your dog. Who attacked a lady in the street? Or something like that. But no, Brahman got attacked.

And this was just after another dog attack a few years ago. I don't know. What does it matter? It's just useless things that are taking up space in my brain. The point is this. Train your dogs. She's there. Yeah, by the way. How about we all tie it together? We'll train your fucking dogs. And if your dog is aggressive,

put a thing around its mouth. What do you do? Yeah, muzzle. Yeah, the fuck? You know, trained. You know? Keep an eye on your dog. You know, keep her Tom Clickio gives dog advice. Keep an eye on your dog. So Bronwyn. So anyway, she's like all she, I mean, this is pretty serious. She got really taken down by this dog. Um, and Brittany's like, well, do you know that Chanel heals all wounds, so you're good? I have an announcement to make.

Chanel has healed my heart from Jared, because we're back together. Anyone? Hey, did you guys go through security without me? Hmm? So now, uh, we're in Puerto Vallarta. And, um, you know, they get... And Prama's being really overly nice to Lisa. She's like, Lisa, you're gonna fall.

You're gonna fall into that van with those shoes on, you little peanut. BOTH LAUGH I know, I just spilled my drink. Ha-ha-ha-ha. And Brahman's like, oh my God, you're spilling it everywhere. Yeah, I'm in heels. Like, what was I thinking? And like, by the way, the airplane bathroom,

it was so disgusting, I couldn't even bother to ditch a ring in there for insurance. It was so gross. And Heather's like, that was me. I didn't want to sit on it, and there was some turbulence, so I just peed everywhere. Well, clean up your piss. What is wrong with you?

I don't clean it up. Jeez. Clean it up? I mean, like, I think I've told this story before. I remember once seeing an interview with Ruth Buzzi, and she said, you don't know how many airplane bathrooms I've cleaned up story before. I remember once seeing an interview with Ruth Buzzi and she said, you don't know how many airplane bathrooms I've cleaned up because I don't want to come out of a bathroom. And the person, next person goes in and says, wow,

I can't believe how messy Ruth Buzzi is. So she just goes and cleans up every bathroom she's in in the airplanes. Heather literally does not care. So she's like, guys, you know what? This trip's gonna be amazing. I promise. I made a PowerPoint for everybody. I want dinner to be perfect.

I want every activity to be perfect. The flowers, the villa, what food is there on arrival? It is covered in this PowerPoint. Yeah, the Notes app is no match for a Lisa Ballot trip. Ha! So they go to this resort called Vidanta World, which I'm sure they, Lisa only picked because... the first four letters are Vida.

They're not dressed up. Guys, I made a resort based off my tequila. Yeah, we're gonna go there. The bottle sort of looks like a slide. As we know, and I wouldn't be surprised because we find out this is where Vida is actually made. I wouldn't be surprised if Lisa just stayed here once. I was like, what should we name the tequila? Vidanta.

Just that's too long. Just take out a couple of letters. All right, send it in, send it in. Vida. So they meet the staff, there's a good butler. They go into the beautiful, of course, beautiful villas. Everything's gorgeous. But we also find out that the way they are going to be arranged

is in two separate villas that are next to each other, and each villa has four bedrooms, and they're identical. But of course, this now means the group has to be split in half. Yes. So she's like, okay, so we have two villas, I'm gonna split us. So, in this villa, we have Marideth, Heather, me, and Brittany. And then in the other, we've got Bronwyn, Angie, Whitney, and soon to be married, probably, maybe, who knows?

And so then she starts doing the math, like the Salt Lake City math of why she's putting everybody where she's putting them. And so she's saying she's good with everybody but Whitney, which is so funny because that's like absolutely not true. Literally, everybody's coming for Lisa at all times. And Whitney doesn't like Meredith, and Angie's not good with Meredith.

So Whitney and Angie, they're sliding all these faces on the screen, and as it goes, it really is a crazy rubber-faced shell game. I'm like, how can anybody concentrate on which one the peanuts under? I know. It gives me a new appreciation. Which one the peanuts? I'm sorry. I just love that's like, well, someone put a peanut under my shoe.

I don't appreciate that. But mitzvahs are not for hate and peanuts can kill someone and that is hate. Well, it's just like it's's all, the faces change so much. Like, you can't play a shell game with those faces, because by the time you stop all the shells, Meredith's face is gonna have morphed 20 different times. You can't even, like today, for example, Meredith and Brooks both were in that first scene,

and they both had eyebrows that I swear to you were two inches lower than they were in any other scene in any other scene in any other episode. I don't know how that happened. And now they're back to normal again. Like, how do you do that? Those are microbladed eyebrows. They don't just move around. I mean, are they lifting their eye? Are they lowering? Do people get eyebrow lowered? Maybe it's a new trend. Maybe it's a new trend in Utah. Utah is really...

People are just like going for the dude eyes. They're just like, bring my hairline down, my eye. They're just going like this. So basically... I'm gonna start it. So basically... This will be the thumbnail, Christina. So basically...

You're, solidarity. Okay, so in one villa, we have Meredith, Heather, Lisa and Brittany. The other villa is Bronwyn, Angie, Whitney and Mary. I have to say when Lisa was going through the reasons why this person can be with this person or that person or that person, I actually felt like the logic kind of panned out. Like I didn't think it was, you know, it becomes a big discussion about like, Lisa was trying to send a message, she may have been doing that. But I also

think the logic was fairly sound because I think if Brittany were in the other Villa that just, I don't know if that would have really worked so well. So, you know, I just I just want to put that out there, like a little bit of some justice for Barlow. I mean, it made sense to me too, but literally, everything makes sense to me. That's why you can't be on a jury. Because I believe everybody at all times. Like, I'll believe the defense, and then I'll believe the prosecution.

And then I'll believe the next one, and then I'll believe that, you know, when everyone calls him a liar, I'll believe that too. I just, I believe everything. Wait, I feel like you don't believe everything. I'll believe that too. I just, I believe everything. Wait, I feel like you don't believe everything. I feel like you're the skeptic and I'm the one who always falls for everything. Aren't I the one who's always like, you know what, she apologized and I really mean it.

And you're like, hell no, Ben. She was just saying that to get screen time. But then I'm pretty easily swayed, I think, because like what I mean is the next week, like one week with Bronwyn, I'm like, oh God, this woman's trash, I don't like her at all. And then the next week I'm like, oh, she's great. I hope she has a 10 year career on this show.

And then the next week I'm like, told you so about Bronwyn sucking. And then the next second, like I just changed my flip-flop because I get new information and it changes my whole opinion. I mean, there are some people I'm just stubborn about no matter what, but I think it's just cause they're so consistently dicks.

Like Kyle, like I said in the Beverly Hills, I forgive Kyle every year. It's just that she gives me fresh stuff to be annoyed by every year. It's not like it's old stuff, you know? But I can be very easily, my mind can be very easily changed. Well, listen, me too. I think someone should just hang us up at a seaside shack and call us flip flops because that's what we are. Yeah, totally. And, you know, proud to be.

It's called having an open mind. An open, empty mind. Open mind, open heart. It's so empty that it's been robbed multiple times. There's literally nothing left, okay? I think everyone knows the defining feature of our podcast is our open hearts. -♪ Come on shoes, here comes one right now. -♪

Hello, ladies and germs, boys and girls girls the grinch is back again to ruin your christmas season with tis the grinch holiday podcast after last year he's learned a thing or two about hosting and he's ready to rant against bristmas cheer and roast his celebrity guests like chestnuts on an open fire you can listen with the whole family as guest stars like john ham, Brittany Broski, and Danny DeVito try to persuade the mean old Grinch that there's a lot to love

about the insufferable holiday season. But that's not all. Somebody stole all the children of Whoville's letters to Santa and everybody thinks the Grinch is responsible. It's a real Whoville whodunit. Can Cindy, Lou, and Max help clear the Grinch's name? Grab your hot cocoa and cozy slippers to find out. Follow Tis the Grinch holiday podcast So, what I was actually surprised at was when Lisa's going on about her Spotify or Apple podcasts. So what I was actually surprised at was when Lisa's going on about the,

the billet arrangements, I'm just thinking, okay, this is just exposition. This is fun to see, but it's just exposition. And it was, I was shocked that right away we went right into drama because Bronwyn's like, I want it because she's already starting to do her puckered lips. And doing... She's like already nodding by the door jam. She's like, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. It's like Bronwyn's no one talking to you right now. Stop nodding. Mm-hmm. She really is. Like the rage just gets her head nodding, you know?

So... And she also just has this broken look on her face. I mean, Bronwyn, listen. One thing that I think Bronwyn does really, really well that's like a housewife classic trait that you have to have is that she just gets so offended. I mean, she's just so... offended at every little thing.

It's like, oh, I can't believe... And she really has that look of just, you have wrecked my whole world. I called you a peanut today. I called you a peanut! And I wound up under my shoe. So Bronwyn is like, she's like, I want to laugh, but really I'm just so fucking furious.

And you know, she's really mad because she starts to tilt over in her interview. That's the other, that's her other sign. Is that when she's in her like crazy outfit, she starts going off to the side. She does do that. She gets off, she literally gets off kilter. And so she's like, I want to laugh, but really,

I'm just so fucking furious about this rooming situation. Lisa is my closest friend in this group. I'm like, are you on ATV right now, lady? Why are you bouncing and tilting so much? Gee. It's sad for me. And once I noticed that, just constantly nodding and shaking, I'm like, stop it.

Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. But she's like, oh, and if Lisa is sending me a message, well, I got the message loud and clear being put in my place and oh, and now I need to claw and beg and plead my case back in Lisa's good graces. Well, she might have to plead her way back into my good graces after this snub.

I demand an apology! HEHEHEHEHE. Oh, my God. Um, so... I love that she acts like she's been best friends. You have been on Lisa's neck this entire season. What are you talking about? Oh, it's so good.

Um, so then, um, Bronwyn's in her room and she's like, well, I'm going to need a bigger closet than this Lisa Parlow. I'm going to need a bigger closet. And Angie is like, but I love your room. What? So by the way, what do you think about the little teams in the villas? And Wendy's like, that was an interesting separation, right? How did Bronwyn get kicked off of the cool girls club, huh?

I mean, I didn't like what Bronwyn did at the party. There were a lot of questionable things that she was doing and saying, and I can see why they don't want her over there. And then Bronwyn was like, hi ladies, am I interrupting? Am I interrupting ladies? I am gonna talk in this high voice because I just heard everything you said

but I'm not gonna yell at you right now because I need allies today ladies. Please come mine in. So they're like, how are you feeling? And she's like, well, I just wanted to know what you guys are wearing tonight.

I'm trying to figure out what I'm gonna be wearing tonight. Oh, God. Whitney, did you just bring cover-ups? If I looked like you, I'd wear cover-ups all the time too. Look at me. Look how nice I'm being to you. Do you like that? I like that. You like that, yes? You're friends with me? Yes. Just want to remind you all, there's a 75% chance I'm carrying rabies at the moment.

Okay, great. So... BOTH LAUGH Can I have some salsa with these rabies. Okay, great. So he's like, also with these rabies. Oh, is that why you got kicked out of the mean girls club? And Brahman's like, I don't know what I've done to Lisa. She knows I was physically attacked by my by a dog. And I physically feel awful. And of all people, Lisa knows what I'm going through with Gwen and how heavy it weighs on me and that I lost my Starbucks card. So by a dog and I physically feel awful. And of all people, Lisa knows what I'm going through

with Gwen and how heavy a weight is on me and that I lost my Starbucks card. So yeah, I think I would deserve to be in the villa with her. I'm like, that has nothing to do with being next door or in the same villa. Yeah. So then we cut to Bronwyn at a restaurant

with Lisa and John. And she's talking about how she wants to advocate what's best for her daughter in this whole situation, but she doesn't know what's best for her daughter. And John's like, well, I was adopted as a baby, and Lisa tried for years to find my birth parents. And, you know, she had this Hollywood ending, like doors would open, doves would fly out,

the final thing would come up on the screen and say, for tequila furnished by Vida, you know. And Lisa's like, it was the exact opposite. And John's like, yeah, she said once the baby was born, she never thought about it again. Okay, listen, lady who gave your kid up for adoption. What the fucking kind of monster are you

to say that to somebody? I mean, even if that's how you felt, they tracked you down, they brought you to fucking brunch, and that's what you're gonna tell the kid? Like, my God, fuck off. At least say, I've thought about you sometimes. Like, every time I see the movie Rambo, I wonder if that's my big strong boy.

I mean, make something up! Do I have to do everything for you people? Well, the weirdest part was that the mother was Linda. And I was like, really? God, so he's related to Monica? So... Um, by the way... And then she pushed me down the stairs. Wait a minute!

And then she started talking to the plant and said, you're my real daughter. But I'm a son and my son. You're my son and my daughter. So I think what's kind of weird is like, I feel like low key John's adoption story has keeps popping up all season. And he's like, because I think they keep don't they keep mentioning it? She's like, yeah, I've been looking up John's birth parents and ancestry. And he's like, I don't want to know.

I don't want to know. And then he finds out. Yeah, she forced him. He asked her not to. They said it on the after show that he asked her not to, and she did it anyway. I mean, that's like, yeah, you can't do that. So, Bramman's like, okay, well, if you could choose

to go back and do it again, would you, John? And he's like, no, I, if you could choose to go back and do it again, would you, Jon? And he's like, no. I mean, who would? You know? Like, who wants to be rejected again? I mean, I do. You know, I'm that kind of person. Like, if someone rejects me, I'll just, like, a year later, I'll be like, oh my gosh, they're on Facebook. I'm gonna be like, oh, hey, how you doing?

And they're still no, Ronnie. Still fucking no, okay? Stop messaging me on Facebook. Oh, man, you should hang out with Kenya Moore. So, Bronwyn is like, I've known Lisa almost 10 years. And I would say, since she introduced me to you guys, I think our friendship has been a bit hit or miss. And I don't know what's going on, but I don't feel super close to Lisa.

And I feel every time I try to tell her, I don't feel super close to her, she reminds me that we are close and everything is fine. And then I see everybody in a group setting and it's not, it's just, it's not the case. And then next thing I know, I'm hanging out with you three idiots. I mean, sorry, I love you guys, but you guys are idiots.

You guys know, you guys are in the cool club. She doesn't even say I love you guys. She's literally just like, and now I'm with you. Like gross. She does say that. Gross, this is disgusting. And she did it last week to Brittany and Maile too, when she was like, oh God, whoever thought I'd be stuck with you two. She literally did that.

She's a snob because she looks at the other group as being the leads of the show and she doesn't care about fucking Lisa. That's why she's coming for Lisa. She's coming for like one of the top dogs, but I think she sees the other ones as leads of the show, and she's like, oh, and now they're gonna put Brittany in my place? Like, Brittany's the newbie they're gonna elevate? Oh, hell no. She really, she really just has stepped into this role so well.

So Whitney is like, BRONWYN was so quick to throw Angie and I under the bus at Camp Day, just to stay in good graces with Lisa and Heather. But look what it got you, cause now you're stuck with us with a tail between your legs. Wait, why does she have a tail?

Someone get the doctor. That's weird cause with the tail between her legs, she looks like she has a wiener. Thank you for correcting my pronunciation. It is till. So, um, Bronwyn's like, I just feel really weird about this rooming. I mean, that's not what I would expect my good friend to do

is put me over here while she and Brittany and Heather and Meredith fucking get the best tattoos together. Like I don't even know what's happening over there. Okay. She, I mean, with everything I'm going through and what about my impairment? Hey, you can't take that from me. Well, it's mine now." Uh...

So then, we go to Lisa's room, and Meredith's like, "'Well, how are you feeling about everyone here?' And she's like, "'Oh, my gosh, so bad,' because Braumman called me and was like, "'Hey, do you want me to bring something for everyone?' And I'm like, "'No, don't, because I've got guests for everyone.' So I like, I thought like a little like weird like, like, are you like giving everyone like a gift?

It's like, she didn't give out Chanel bracelets, she gave out Chockeys from CVS. But I do agree with you that Bronwyn did this shit on purpose by being like, hey, do you want me to bring, is it okay if I bring gifts? And Lisa said no, and then she did it anyway. Like, that's shitty, you know? Because originally, I would have been the same way. I would have been like, who cares? More gifts, the more gifts, the better.

But to ask somebody and then purposely be like, oh, I'm gonna do whatever I want when you're the hostess. When we saw what she was like when she was the hostess. But then again, we also saw how Lisa acted towards her when she was the hostess. So, I don't know that anyone's gonna really win this one. Yeah. Um, yeah, so she is not... Where are we? I got lost. I know we're generally where we are.

But it's not weird, because, like, it's my trap. Like, why are you bringing guffs? Like, I have stuff for everybody. I do. Like, I told you not to bring a guff. Like, you don't have to bring a guff. If... Oh, my God, if it's Greg, I'm gonna kill everybody. So Meredith is like, well, do you think it was just... I guess I should have said, like, Patron.

Okay, well, thank you for correcting the terrible joke. Well, do you think it was just kind of like a screw you, or do you think she just sort of already ordered it and just thought, I'll do it anyway? You know, it does take a long time for things to get delivered for Molly. Bum! No, I felt like she was like, I'm gonna do what I want.

And I don't care if it's Lisa's trip, because I spent $35 on passport holders from Spencer's gifts and he's just gonna hand them out no matter what I say. So basically, she's like, Bronwyn is always annoyed with me if I don't do exactly what she wants. But then she doesn't care about how I feel. And she does whatever she wants. And I'm kinda over her! So how do you feel with Andre? I made sure she was in another villa

just so it wasn't uncomfortable. Meredith's like, I appreciate that, and so do any sluts in the near vicinity. BLAIR LAUGHS You know what? It's just not, you know, she says so many mean things to so many people in front of so many toddlers. I mean, whether it's slut-shaming, whether it's shaming someone's business,

whether it's shaming someone's ability to understand the difference between a spoon and a plane coming into the hangar, it's just, I've had enough. What's she gonna do to top herself? Go to a handicapped spot, wait for someone to park, call them a slut while they're trying to walk into the business of thing on

justice for slutty and parent people with with companies and toddlers celebrating becoming a woman. So, Lisa's like, well, she better be on her best behavior. Like, the best behavior! So now, um, so now it's dinner. We're getting ready for dinner time. And everyone's in Poland. No one has congratulated me on being a character in this episode.

I love that I'm basically the butler in this episode. The second he came on, I was like, really? Am I being trolled? Because that is literally me. Even I thought it was me for a minute. Rudy the butler. I was like, is that me? Have I blacked that out? Rudy Kirim.

Yeah. They're like, wait a second. I've had enough of this. So, Meredith's like, I've had enough of this. So Meredith's like, um, Rudy, I want you to take this bag and put it on a chair down at dinner. And he's like, yes, girl icon. He's like, thank you.

Love your podcast. I was like, thank you. We send you some bath bombs when they're ready. It's like, sure. Well, I'm going to send you a special surprise one. And one more thing, Rudy, you are enough. And if you can't get into your locker, that's okay. It's not God's fault.

We're trying now. So, Meredith's like, okay, so now, so we see what she's talking about on a flashback after the Bat Mitzvah when Meredith is opening gifts. And she goes, well, let's see what our thoughtful gift is. And Seth goes, what is that? Dish soap? And she pulls it out,

and it's not only shampoo and conditioner, it is gigantor bottles of shampoo and conditioner. It's like a shampoo and conditioner that ain't ever gonna run out. That is industrial size. It's not even Costco size. It's like a shampoo and conditioner that ain't ever going to run out. That is industrial size. It's not even Costco size. That's industrial size is a huge amount. But it's actually it's so big. It doesn't really feel like a gift. It's like it doesn't feel like like if you're gonna give her own brand, you know, it's also

her own brand to people on their bot mit stuff. Yeah. So yeah, it was a weird choice. And Meredith is like, well, it looks like we have shampoo and conditioner from her own salon. Can you read the ingredients? And Chloe's like, yeah, there's sulfate in this one. Ew, really? Yeah. There's also gluten and possibly dairy.

I'll have to investigate. Are you drinking the shampoo? Stop that. The point is, it was not thoughtful. It was not thoughtful at all. Because she knows I cannot use that shampoo. I have keratin in my hair. And it means a sulfate-free shampoo, so she can have it.

Mm-mm. I'm having a... BOTH LAUGH The largest offense of all. A sulfate shampoo for your keratin-infused hair. She's so offended. I can't wait for Bronwyn and Meredith to get into it. Because these are the most offended people.

The Bravos. Beautifully. Yeah, so I can't wait to see them both get into it together. It's so wonderful. So, um, now they're all getting onto the golf carts to go to dinner and Lisa's like, is there air conditioning? Ha ha ha. And then they get to the bar.

I couldn't tell if she was joking or not. I'll be honest, I couldn't tell. I don't think she was joking. So like Lisa, we're outside. It's like, whatever. I wish they were. You know what? If they were making an effort,

they would have put some flaps on this golf cart because my carrot and hair is not reacting well to humidity, and we only have about five minutes before my scalp bursts out into flames. So come on, hurry up. But they... Oh, so then they get to the restaurant, and they go sit down and they're like, oh my God, it's a lovely place.

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Girls, I have an announcement. Oh, God. Fucking threatening. Oh, my God. Girls, I just want everyone to know that I'm finally part of this world. I say, Oh, okay, Brittany, you don't have to go back to Disney Tokyo. She's okay. Sorry. That was the latest video I saw of her, her singing as Ariel. So I would picture her as more of a bell, like bonjour, bonjour, bonjour, bonjour.

It's like just annoying everybody down the street with books she doesn't read. Because you know, Brittany's got bookcases full of books she doesn't read. She's just one of those people. Well, also, I'm surprised that she has not made that the cornerstone of one of her big scenes. Like, guys, it's just so strange. I walk up to the group and no one says hello to me. I'm just used to just

walking down the street and people saying, hello, hello, good morning. I mean, admittedly, it was in a musical on stage in Tokyo in 1999, but still, like, it's part of my personality now. She gets fired from Disney Tokyo because they're like, uh, listen, we can't have Belle complaining that the Beast and her keep breaking up every day. Okay? It's just not...

Can't have that. We can't have Belle interrupting the light parade to announce that she has been basically made official in a Costco. Okay? It just doesn't... It's a family place. Listen, Brittany, we'd, you know, you have a beautiful singing voice. We love what you've done here in Disney Tokyo.

But the thing is this, it really takes the audience out of the show when you turn to them and you make an announcement and say, hey, I have an announcement, everyone. I now have legs. We know, we see, we're watching the show. You don't have to announce it to the audience. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Stupid thing. Everyone, I have to say, I'm back together with the Beast. See, again, you just did it. You're ruining it. Yeah, fucking stupid, Brittany. Um, so Brittany makes an announcement,

and everybody's just quiet because literally, Brittany makes an announcement every day. And Lisa's like, yeah, it's like every five seconds. Ding, ding, ding. I have an announcement to make. I'm going to the bathroom. She's like, guys, this is serious. You guys, you know that I've been struggling with hair. Angie, shut up.

I've been struggling with my daughters, not talking to me and stuff, but oh my gosh, Olivia, we have made such progress, guys. They're like, okay. She's like, no, well, she actually, she came over the other night. She hung out with her friend. We talked for hours and guys, she spent the night. It's huge.

Like, okay. I'm going to this like, well, that's amazing. And on top of that, you have an eyelash on your cheek. So you get to make a wish here. I'll make the wish for you. I wish for Brittany to disappear. Oh, shoot, I shouldn't have said it out loud. Sorry. Can I have a question? When your daughter was at her home, did she slouchy you? No, I should have invited her to my mom's spot. I would have been a good guest.

So Brittany's like, guys, this is a really big deal. I have two beautiful daughters from my first marriage, and they're not currently speaking to me because of things that happened in my second marriage. Girl, you already told us why they aren't speaking to you. Because you... you prioritized a man over your kids, and they said, fuck you, and got rid of you. So, I wouldn't talk to you either. God knows what that man wanted or did.

Terrible. Terrible. But guess what? Please have the show forever. We're finally making progress. And now, ha, finally making progress on this front and no one says anything? Dude, ouch. Which is true.

But that's what happens when you make too many stupid announcements that when you actually have a decent announcement to make, no one even cares anymore. The girl who cried erasure. But also... I would girl who cried erasure. But also, yeah, also it's like not something that you announce at a group dinner. It's just weird and meanie and sad and best friend, you know, love you.

So then- No, well also the way you do it is you don't bring it on yourself. What you do is you pout at the table and look sad. And when someone says, Brittany, what's wrong? Well, it's wrong? Well, it's just going through a lot right now.

You know, my daughters have erased me, but one of them's back. And then you go from there. But like, if you try to force it when someone else is trying to have a scene about something else, it's not gonna work. Yeah, it's not your trap. Like, yeah, do it in the right way.

There are processes. There's like a bureaucracy here, okay? Yeah. Hey everyone. This is the end of part one of this recap for part two. Keep an eye on your podcast feed. It is coming up in just a moment. Thanks so much for listening.

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