Watch What Crappens - #2732 Southern Hospitality S03E07: Grace Land

Episode Date: February 18, 2025

DJ Maddi LOfu**ingL and Joey Marbles pretend to tie the knot in Vegas on this week’s Southern Hospitality, and Will is still most definitely not cheating on Emmy. To prove it, Emmy unleashes rivers of mascara onto us and the city. To watch this recap on video, listen to our Traitors bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Tickets for the Mounting Hysteria Tour are now on sale at watchwhatcrappens.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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about on Ye Or Braves. I'm Ronnie, that's Ben. Hello Ben. Hi Ronnie, how are you? Good, it's Southern Hospital Day. How else could I be but wonderful. Everybody, we're on tour, the Mountain Hysteria Tour, coming to your city soon. Listen up, in March we'll be at the, we'll be, oops, sorry, I was reading the wrong month.

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Not much. We recorded a guest spot over on Carlos King's podcast. So you all have to go listen to that. We love Carlos. He is just the best. So be sure to check out his show wherever you get podcasts. He's a good guy. You're a good guy, Carlos.

You're a good guy, Carlos. That was a really fun one. We talked all about Potomac and other stuff. So join us over there. Here we are with Southern Hospitality, Not Pretty in Sin City, season three, episode seven. We are here. And the big, the big cliffhanger going into the episode is will Grace Lilly

get to the pool on time to sing her iconic lyrics? La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la She's on the ones and the twos, crossfading, pressing play, crossfading, pressing play, crossfading, pressing play, all the stuff to really show who she is and be herself out there on the stage. Everything's happening. And Grace Lilly's not there, and I don't know, everybody's starting to get offended, but nobody's more offended than TJ.

Of course, TJ's like, um, it's pretty slap in the face. It's like pretty slap in the face that she doesn't show. That's actually the name of one of my wieners, slap in the face. I know. It's like, this would be like showing up at Sir Wieners and asking for a burger. It's just like a slap in the face. Hmm.

So, um, Mattie's like, I was very aware of the risk that I took when I gave Grace Lilly this chance to further her musical career, but I did it anyway. Oh my God. How are you, how is your musical career ever gonna recover from some rando not showing up to sing La La La La in sync with the album at this pool party in Vegas? How are you gonna recover, song time?

Now Maddy understands what it was like when Quincy Jones rolled the dice on Michael Jackson, you know? This is just like when Pavrotti didn't show up to the Grammys and Aretha Franklin had to sing a song instead. Or like when Parvati showed up to the Traders and decided to roll the dice on some headbands.

Sometimes as an artist you just have to take risks and they will pay off. Yep. So then we, Maddie's freaking out. Well, not freaking out, but everybody else is. So now the rest of the cast is heading over to the DJ table and they're like, yeah, Maddie. And Joe's like, that's my girlfriend over there.

That's my girlfriend, everybody. That's my girlfriend over there. That's my girlfriend, everybody. That's my girlfriend. And then she's like, we hear Maddie be like, where's Grace? Where's Grace? If Grace doesn't start popping it in the next five minutes,

I'm gonna start popping off. Classic marbles. You know he got that from Luann. Well, it was like get over here You just start popping off and I'm popping you fucker. Get over here Wasting my alright kid. Let me let me show you the way the world works when they ask you how you feel about something You use a word in two different ways. Here you go. If they don't start popping it I'm gonna pop off. Now you try. If Nana doesn't make me chicken parm, I'm gonna have spaghetti.

That's wrong, but oh whatever. Fuck me anyway. I'm gonna parm Nana. That's it. It's creepy, but it works. Hit it boys. It works in its own way. So then Molly's like, Grace is an idiot.

You can't even show up on time for your best friend set. I mean, what are you even doing in this life? And then we see Grace is just doing her makeup. So Molly says, if she has a package of cat peeps showing up at our front door, it wasn't me. Ha ha ha. Wow, so be Molly, great defender of Grace Lilly. So then back to the club, Grace Lilly finally gets there

and she comes to the cast and she's like, come on guys, come on, we need to get hyped up. We're already hyped up, Grace Lilly. How are you an hour late? She's like, I didn't know I had to be here at a certain time. I just thought it was like kind of a come when you come. I thought it was like I could show up whatever time of the day and they'll just start

playing my song and I'll just sing. That's how it works, right? He's like, we told you sound check was at one. She's like, well, but I had sounded one. I checked the sound on my phone. It was on vibrate at 1 p.m. Is that what you meant? He's like, just so you're sorry to my ass. She's like, for what? I'm here, aren't I? You know what? Some of the greatest performers aren't always on time, but we wait for them. Yeah, you're not one of those.

OK? Sorry. You're not one of those. I would barely wait on you, and I was a waiter for like 40 years. How could you say that? I got to sing la, la, la, la, la, la, la. I mean, you wait for that, right?

She's like, Oh my God, it's the next song already. And Matt is like, You were late, Grace Lilly. That is crazy. This is a record. Okay, and it's a record that will be played in a certain order. Oh, no, I didn't practice my la la la la la. Are we sure it's la la la and not la la la? I'm so confused. God, are you sure we're going on right next? Hey everybody, it's Grace Lilly. Grace, right? Am I right? It's Grace Lilly. So everybody cheers. And then the song popping it starts playing it and starts playing and Grace is just very badly lip syncing because of course this is all

tracked, you know? I mean, you're not going to sing live in a DJ set anyway, are you? I mean, I guess some gonna sing live in a DJ set anyway, are you? I mean, I guess some people do, but not Grace Lilly. No, thank God. I just keep on popping it like there's no stopping it. La la la la. And everyone is like, huh. And some people are like,

this song is actually kind of catchy, but Grace Lilly keeps on, she's up there, she's standing on top of the DJ booth and she's like waving her arm around. She just kind of looks like a drunk girl that climbed up on top of there. Like you would never know she's an actual performer on this track.

And it turns out that they had turned off her microphone just in case. That's just smart. It was very smart. But it's also, you know, I mean, she doesn't get enough credit because not only can she not sing, but she also can't move to the rhythm of the beat. Listen, bring your hula hoop.

Where's your hula hoop? I mean, I just feel like her mom's at home. Like I trained her so hard with that thing and then she's just shitting it all down the toilet for what? For what? Bring the hula hoop. What? You're going to use all my bag of tricks. So, um, Luanne was the original hula hoop queen on Bravo. Let's never forget when she brought a hula hoop to Bethany's house in a never to endure herself. Yeah.

No one will talk to me here. Well, watch me hula hoop. She literally did that. So Grace is doing this and everyone's dancing and everyone's like laughing at her. and Grace and Maddie is like, Grace doesn't take anything seriously so I can't trust her singing on a microphone. So it all ends this one song and smoke comes out, et cetera. The audience poops. The audience just poops all over the dance floor.

It's like, damn it. When are we going gonna learn about smoke when she was on Bravo? I did really think about that. Wow, I'm so proud of Maudit. I can't believe the way she pressed play on her laptop, it was just so amazing. And then the club promoters like, hey guys, great job. That was the best we've ever seen in Vegas. Seriously, we've never seen a better DJ in Vegas. I'm just like, oh my God, dude, thanks so much for that.

He's not complimenting you, Miss Kardashian. Sit down, Chris. Also, what is this random guy? He's like, well, what is he? He's like every DJ that we've, that I've seen so many DJs start out here at the Day Club. And like, you were amazing. Like they've all gone on to do great things.

Like Mitzi Leibowitz, she's over at the buffet buffet now she spins from 11 a.m. to 12 they love her they love when they bring out the shrimp cocktail oh and you should see the guys playing over by the slots I mean they all started here they all go through me now listen if you ever need a bat mitzvah or bar mitzvah okay we're not picky Mitzi Mitzi Lebowitz is the way to go. She started here. Tell your 13-year-old, Mitzi Lebowitz began here. Have you ever heard Evergreen remix with a sick beat? That's Mitzi Lebowitz for you.

Have you ever heard Papa, Can You Hear Me? Remixed with Stop, Stop, what was that? Get Out of My Dreams and Into My Car. Okay, then you haven't heard of Mitzi Bot. Okay. Have you ever heard of, you ever heard of The Way We Were with a little ee-ow in the middle of it?

God, it's sick. Crowd goes nuts. So then the cast is cheering for her and stuff and Brad and Lake are making out. And Molly's like, wow, when Brad friendzoned Lake, it definitely got into her head and now she's like trying to reel him in so she can friendzone him. That's a girl boss right there.

A hundred. I was like, wow. When I saw that, I thought girl boss, hashtag girl boss. I was like, those are two drunk people and there's nothing more to it. Yeah. So now they're back at the hotel and they're gonna have disco cowboy night. So they all have to go get their disco stuff on

and Molly's gonna go take a tiddy pit. And in the presidential, Emmy and Will walk in with Mia. And Mia's like, oh my God, smells like sex in here, guys. And Will goes, huh, no, I'm a lawyer. So. Smells like law school. So then Brad is, they're talking, Brad and the boys,

Brad, TJ, Mia, they're all talking about the day and everything, and Brad's like, he's like, yo, it's cool seeing Maddie up there. Yeah, she looked really happy. And they're just like, you know, just it's back and forth, but it's basically ultimately leading up to Emmy and Will. And so Emmy is like, my vibes are high, but like Maddie brought the energy

and it's just like, Grace is just like awful. She's so awful. And we just see Grace back there being like, I didn't realize it was so wrong. I mean, look, it's not like she was doing it all on her own. She didn't need me to be there on time. And Austin's telling her, wow, I was really shocked that that song was like so good. And she's just, well, you know, she has people to help her. It's not like she's doing it all on her own. Oh, okay. Better context. Unlike Whitney Houston,

who just sat there on her task cam and recorded every single song on her own. Excuse you, ma'am, have some respect. Yeah, exactly. So they talk about this for a while. They talk about how nice it was that Joe was supportive and everything like that. And they're saying how Joe's like obsessed with her and everything. And Michael's like, by the way, I noticed,

I was like, this is like devastating for me when I saw this. It was like shocking, but like devastating for me when I saw this, it was like shocking. But when we were at the pool, like Emmy and Will shut off and I was like, oh my God, they're like shutting off right now, like what do I even do right now? And meanwhile, Brad is like, yeah, Joe's like really obsessed with Maddie, huh?

And she's just like, yeah, well, I think that Joe needs someone in his life that is constantly succeeding because he's looking to like move up and that's her. Jesus, are you a good friend at all ever? Is anybody on this show ever just a good friend of each other? These people are terrible and I hope they last 20 seasons. I know, TJ is like dissing Joe for upward mobility

while he's actively calling in favors from all of his friends to help launch his wiener business. That's true. You didn't mind when Joe was taking off his shirt to slap himself with some sir wieners. Yeah. So Michael's is saying how like Will and Emmy shut off at the, they were not like really hanging out with people and we cut to Will and Emmy and Will's like everyone's like not having fun with us. Do you know what I mean? And they're like, yeah. And then we see that they were like,

well, I guess it was a flashback. They just like sit down sadly in the middle of the day club to be like, no one wants to be with us. No one's paying attention to us. It's not about you, get in the center and cheer. What the hell? Yeah.

So then they're talking with Mia about group dynamics and Will's like, you know, it's like really hard being here with these people cause like they've been nothing but horrible to me. And Mia just goes, well, you talk shit about your girlfriend. Mia's great in this scene. He goes, no, I made a mistake and I'm ashamed of it.

She goes, yeah, well, I want to see you say that tonight. And I want to see everyone's reaction. He's like, oh, me say that? I didn't talk shit, I just made a mistake. And she's like, people need to know that you're a good boyfriend to Emmy because right now what's on the table is that you're not. Okay, and that is from a fifth place Miss Whatever.

So get it together. And he's like, it's not really my style though. She's like, okay, well, if you need to suck up then, and you need a bathroom to do it in, we'll all go to the bathroom. Okay. Yeah, this guy's a real winner. He has like people are like coming for his girlfriend because of his actions, because he went into their business, talk shit about her. And now they're all like, Oh, we're not so sure about your boyfriend.

And rather than like put himself in an uncomfortable situation and clear, about her, and now they're all like, we're not so sure about your boyfriend. And rather than put himself in an uncomfortable situation and clear it all up and really jump on the sword or whatever, he's like, I don't know, it's not my style. I'm really uncomfortable doing it. I don't wanna do that. It just feels crazy. Yeah, it's like, I don't wanna give them that pleasure. Well, the whole point is that you're giving

too many people pleasure in bathrooms. The least you could do is say sorry to the friends, okay? And then I feel like, I don't wanna give them that pleasure. Well, the whole point is that you're giving too many people pleasure in bathrooms. The least you could do is say sorry to the friends, okay? And then I feel bad, because he's stuck in this Amazon disco shirt, because I bought the same one years ago to try on for some stupid, probably for the crappies. And I was like, even I can't wear this. I mean, this is just terrible.

It's made out of plastic. And then he wears it the whole time. So I felt kind of sorry for him. But then I remembered it was Will. So Mia says, Will Culp does not have humility. And this is exactly what he needs at this very moment. It would fix so much for him. It would fix so much for Emmy. And we could be one big happy family again.

I mean, the irony that this guy is named Will Culp, but he can't actually be culpable about anything is... So then people are getting ready for the disco party and it's time. Lake needs somebody on areola duty guys. Her nipple showing, boss bitch. So then we go to Red Tail Restaurant, which is Will's like looking around for a communist

to bang in the bathroom. He's like... Literally telling a red. And so then everyone's seated down and everything and TJ like turns graceful and he's like, so why were you so late? I was like. She's like, I wasn't late.

I didn't know time I was supposed to be there. So you can't be late if you don't know what time you're supposed to be there. Duh. What do you mean? I don't know. Maddie knew when was supposed to be there. So you can't be late if you don't know what time you're supposed to be there. What do you mean? I don't know. Maddie knew when she needed to be there. She's like, well, I was there though. So it's like you're saying I wasn't there, but I was there. So Joe's like an hour late, like we needed to warm up.

Like I needed to see your mouth go and you didn't do it. So like if you, if you, if you're not going to pop in it, then we're not going to watch Mary Poppins later. Right? So grace Lily's wrong. Try it again. Young one. The spirit of Lou Ann's like wrong grasshopper wax on wax off my vagina. So Grace is like, listen, it was no disrespect. And then it goes, yeah, but like you walked up as I was like playing your song.

So it was kind of disrespectful. She's like, yeah, well then that was perfect timing. Uh, Grace, do you know her at that time? We need to get ready for a set time. And that's just how, that's how it is. And she's like, well, sometimes it's just not about y'all. And then we get that. Listen, you guys keep poking at her.

She showed up. You can't yell at the woman for getting there on time. She did get there on time. She got there on time for her song. I'm on Team Grace Lilly for this. I am not on Team Grace Lilly for this. First of all, her saying, sometimes it's not about y'all. It's the reason why they're there.

You are all there to see this set. There's a poster on the side of a rider truck driving up and down the strip, okay, that has Maddie's face on it. So like- A rider truck. Listen, it is $12.99 an hour to take this you all- I'm sorry, it's changed over to the Maddie Reese.

Listen, Maddie Reese is in town right now. Yeah, and also honestly, just as like a friend, like you should just be there on time just to see Maddie press play on her laptop because this is a big deal for her, you know? Like don't just show up when it's your song, show up for your friend. She was putting on makeup, so team grace.

I take it all back. It was hard. Have you seen those eyelashes? They're like a conversation with the pop-arwe. They're like 20 pounds. It didn't just happen overnight, that makeup. It took a very long time. She was like, in case we don't get our own private cabana, I'm going to attach one to my eyelashes and you guys can all assemble under it.

So they're all mad. They're all like pretend mad at her because no one's shocked. You know what I mean? And so he's like, you're an art. They're all like pretending mad at her cause no one's shocked. You know what I mean? And so he's like, you're an art athlete, say sorry or something. And she's like, when you're a guest, you pop up as a guest. So that's what I did.

Surprise, I'm a guest, it's me. La la la la la la la. You know, Maddie and I go back five or six years and her and I communicate great and almost as good as me and Bob Marley do. So I don't know why Joe is involving himself in the situation. I mean, let the artists handle it, Joe.

You're just a groupie. Well, guess what? If Maddie is the big deal, if it's a big deal to Maddie, it's a big deal to our children. It's like, whoa, Joe, Joe, whoa, Joe. So Mia's like, Maddie, put your foot down. Come on, have a scene, do this. Fight, fight, fight.

And race Lily, meanwhile, is going off on Joe. And she's like, well, Maddie hasn't spoken to me about it and you're speaking for her. So I think you should let her speak for herself. So Maddie goes, they're all looking at Maddie to have a fight. They're like, listen, we're in Vegas and literally nothing has happened.

So let's do something. And so Maddie just goes, you showed up. She goes, thank you. She goes, but I mean, if you didn't, I wouldn't be surprised. And she's like, I wouldn't do that. I would never ever do that. And Mia's like, um, sometimes being on the defense is never really the answer. Okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Maddie. It was not intentional. I don't think it was. And I appreciate you saying that. She's like, yeah, that's not right. It's like, oh, okay. I guess this is resolved. Yeah. So, um, they're like, well, let's just make a church to pop in that. Okay. You can still be wavy. Okay. Didn't mean to come into Taki grace. Lily. That was rough.

I know that was like a rough moment in your life. So, hope it's all good now. Yeah. Mia's like, okay everyone, shall we now go at Will? I feel like, I think that's something that could bring us all together. Like, yeah, sure, let's go attack Will. They really, it was so funny.

They're just like having so much fun in Vegas that they're forgetting that they have to shoot a show. It's like, okay, well, we need to fight. We haven't really earned our free hotel room. So, well, you're up. And he's like, there's something I want to address at the table. Objection sustained.

Thank you, your honor. That was all me. I've said things that were very critical of our relationship, you know, mine and Emmy's. And, you know, I have so much regret about that because, you know, Emmy and I discussed it ourselves and we're working on it. And it's something I feel a lot of shame about.

Mostly the her being too thin and anorexic and like full of herself. Like that's really rough on me. I'm sorry, did I say that? Yeah. Yeah. And like in terms of like TJ, like I just wanna say TJ, if you'll give me the opportunity,

I would like to deflect this entire situation onto you. So thanks for being a shitty friend, TJ. And he's like, wait, what did I do? I showed up on time for this dinner. The last person I attacked was Joe and he didn't hear it. So I don't know why I'm in this. And then he's like, because you brought it up in front of everyone

at the dinner table. Like seriously? And Emily, Emily just starts that hair pulling thing. I'm like, Oh no, Emmy, Emmy, stay calm, Emmy, stay calm. She's like, Oh. Yeah. And we see two weeks ago, TJ viciously bringing it up at the table by saying, how's your tuck?

Yeah, it was Michael Michaels who really did it. And she's like, me and Michaels, it was good. And he's like, I don't know, cause like, I feel like you kind of gave me the run around. Is that a new type of brew? Because I kind of have dibs on giving you coffees. It's like, no. So Emmy is like, I just don't see the whole flashback

and Emmy losing her mind and relax. So Emmy says, I hold TJ to a higher standard and TJ was like mine and Will's best friend and best friends don't humiliate best friends the way he humiliated me and Will. I'm like, have you met TJ? This is like all he has to do. This is like his, this is his dream

is to be able to do this with you guys. Well also, you picked the wrong best friend. We watched you doing this to your best friend, or one of your best friends, What's Your Buns, Hello Fucking Elle, Maddie, all the last season. So you don't get off that easy. I mean, this was your whole storyline last season, was coming for her relationship.

And so it's your turn. So just enjoy it, calm yourself. And TJ is like, wow, I mean, what was the one who said all these things about his girlfriend? Not me, I mean, I have, but I'm not dating her. So like, who cares? So back to the restaurant, Emmy is like doing the hair thing again. And Will's like, revisiting us doesn't help us.

So I have feelings hurt that are, I have feelings that are hurt and I want to express that. Like, come on, Dan. The real victim, Will Culp. Well, we find out later why he is truly a victim here, guys. But he says, I don't like this, and I feel like it'd be more beneficial to have maybe some real healing

that we can enact maybe down the line when I'm fucking a girl in the bathroom somewhere. I don't know. Yeah, if you really wanna kill me, maybe you could blow me like you blew Joe. I mean, I'm sorry, did I say that out loud? Have we already talked about that? Like, that was lost, Leek was a very meaningful scene.

And so Leek's like, well, Leek, Leek. Her name is Leek, she's like a delicious, mild onion. Leek is like, wait, a Leek's not an onion, is it? A Leek is an Allium. Yeah, it's like an anise flavored. It's in the family. So America.'s not an onion, is it? A leek is an allium. Yeah, it's like an anise-flavored. It's in the family. So America's. It's an onion.

It's like a wonderful onion friend. Okay, thank you. It's a cool cousin of an onion. Thank you. In the 1980s, a rose swept the country. Hey Mike, I really like this white Zinfandel. Well good, good. Now put it down, I'm going to try another one.

White Zin became America's top selling wine. But most don't know that this sweet drink has a sour history. What began in 1986 with counterfeit bottles… A big fraud. A multi-million dollar fraud. Sent investigators chasing one of the most powerful families in the business, the Lacharties. But the closer the feds got to them, the more dangerous things became.

It's a story of deceit. At the time, I was paranoid. Threats. You touched my kids. I will kill you. And murder. With a.22 caliber bullet to the head. What started with a scheme to mislabel wine

spilled into a blood-soaked battle for succession. Welcome to Blood Vines. You can binge listen to Blood Vines exclusively and ad-free on Wondery+. Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app, Apple podcasts, or Spotify. At 24, I lost my narrative, or rather, it was stolen from me. And the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes, and politics. I would define reclaiming as to take back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again.

So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks, both recognizable and unrecognizable names, about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph. My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up. They connected with the people that I'm talking to and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts.

It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappence commercial. So, Cousin of an Onion is like, what about the cheating allegations? Because everybody's hearing it. Just tell them what you told me. Austin speak already. God, I love Lake. Lake has really come on to be a wonderful addition to the season. The first few episodes, I was sort of like, OK, they just gave us Lake, but we don't understand who she is. And over the past like four or five, she's just been great. And I just love her just being exhausted and be like, okay, well,

can we talk about the cheating? And so everyone's like, oh, and Austin is like all upset because he's trying to, um, you know, cover for his girlfriend. So he's like, um, well, uh, this girl that just recently graduated law school goes, oh, don't you know Emmy? And I said, yeah. And she says, oh, well, I go to law school with Will and he cheats on her all the time. And then Will and Emmy, like Emmy's like, Oh my, Oh my, Oh my. She has that look on her face and Will's like, has the, Oh shit look on his face. And he's like, I don't care about the rumors. And they're like, come on, say the whole thing. And there's more to it.

His little brother went on Reddit and was like, I'm Will's little brother, AMA, ask me anything. And so people were like, is this true? Is all this stuff true? And he's like, No, I love my brother. He's an amazing brother. And Emmy, hold on, Emmy what? What do you want? Emmy loves, Emmy has great hair and she conditions conditions it regularly. They're like, wait a minute, or Will and Emmy there. He's like, yeah, just to make sure this doesn't go off the rails.

Well, what the hell kind of AMA is that? Yeah. What's Will giving you? Weirdo, he's so cute though. Yeah. No offense, little brother, love you. I believe in you. So Austin, Will's like, I'm not concerned about rumors.

So Joe is like, hey, say the whole thing. You did not say the whole thing, Austin. Say the whole thing or Maddie Reese is not gonna work with you again. And so like spit it out, man. We don't have all day old man, log lifter. And he's like, well, she also says that you fucked a girl in a bathroom.

Doon, doon, doon. Will's like, no, I did not, okay? It was more of like a guest's room with like a futon. Will, I mean, no, we didn't have any sex at all. What are you talking about? So Austin's like, yeah, apparently they hooked up in a bathroom, but it got worse. Cause then they said that he'd actually been

fucking a bunch of different girls. And then he's like, huh, what's your name? What's your name? What is it then? What's your name? It doesn't count if you don't tell me your name. I mean, if you don't know your name. I'm not going to do that. You know, I heard this from my girlfriend and she heard it from somebody who goes to law school with Will and apparently they were privy to this information. Privy is a legal term and I learned it from the law school person, but I don't wanna tell anybody that because I'm trying to protect my girl

even though that ship has kind of sailed because I've been mentioning her like 10 times in my explanation of how I learned this. That girl wants you to mention it and she wants you to bring her on TV to confront them about it. The producers just won't let her on. Who are you kidding?

So then Emmy's like, where's the evidence? Where's the proof? What the fuck? There's nothing we can do. There's nothing we can do. They're coming. They're everywhere I turn. They're there.

They're there. I can't even go to a bathroom anymore. I just piss behind a bus because I can't do anything. I can't do anything. I can't do anything. I can't do anything. I can't do anything. Jesus.

At which point she takes a wine bottle and cracks over the side of the table. And what was the pointy part out of it? Everyone's like, everyone stay back. You guys are going to stay in your seats At which point she takes a wine bottle and cracks over the side of the table and pulls the pointy part out of it. Everyone's like, everyone stay back. You guys are going to stay in your seats and we're going to go back up to our rooms and we're going to talk and we're going to pack our bags. But if you, I swear to God, if one of you guys follows us, you're going to get this

glass right in your chest. I swear to fucking God, you're not going to get me this time. And Will's like, no one's going to believe me anyway, babe. And Grace Lily's like, I believe you. I believe you and i respect you and as soon as you need to walk away just walk away do what jesus did when bob marley took down his pants and wait a minute yeah they had a lot of fun up there so lake goes oh it's just a fucking pity party blah blah blah bwa bwa boring. And then he's like, So Emmy is like, The birds, the birds won't stop coming.

They won't stop going. Oh my god, he's just, he does some shit on me. Like I'm psychotic. Like I'm psychotic. What am I nuts? Like I know everything about him. It's just not true. It's not true, you guys.

So Emmy's like, I can't take a break. I can't do this. And Michael's like, okay, give me your hand and squeeze. Squeeze. I'm trying to relax you. Squeeze. Squeeze. Squeeze.

Squeeze. Squeeze. Squeeze. Squeeze. Squeeze. Squeeze can't do this. And Michael's like, okay, give me your hand and squeeze. Squeeze, I'm trying to relax you. Squeeze, squeeze. I literally shit my pants right now. Why did you squeeze that hard?

Oh my God. She like squeezed so hard. I was kind of like, what's going on? I do like that feelings for me. I just love how, I love Michael's, sorry. I just love the way Michael's tries to calm down Emmy because he always winds up just yelling at her. Relax!

We see that she just does this like every five minutes, you know? So he's like, I think that Emmy has a five year plan for her and Will, so like anytime Will gets called out, she sees like another year added to that plan. It's just like so sad. And then we see clips of Emmy being like, and then by 2027, I see ourselves with a baby and married in a house, a house, a house with a roof. There's pipes coming out of the roof. There's little pipes going down the side in case it rains and it's going to go down the roof and it's going to collect in a pipe. It's

going to water a garden, a garden that our children play with. She's going to slowly segue into somewhere that's green. I like that. Michael's called it a glitch in the system. That's a hundred percent the best way to describe it. Cause that's, she is, she becomes a glitch. You know, she's like, no, no, well, it cannot be a possibly cheat. So we come back to the restaurant and Austin, he's like, guys, I don't want this to be a fucking conversation. It's a Friday night, let's have fun.

I'm like, no, shut up, make a conversation. We've been waiting. Conversation. You also started the conversation weirdo. So everybody's like, that's a song, Comfortable. And Will's like, I'm outta here. So they leave. And then it's really quiet for a minute.

And then everybody's looking at each other and Austin goes, is this grass fed? Shut up, Austin. Not LOL. So now it's like, they're all gonna go to like, they go to their hotel rooms and everything. And everyone's like looking rough in bed and you know it's the next day now people are gonna wake are waking up and they're gonna

go like separate and go out to like different like breakfast and stuff or go to the pool and we're gonna have kind of like a like let's talk about last night kind of thing. So they just were all wasted last night that's the that of that. So then we go to Grace Lilly in Austin's and Grace is like, hey, I got more coffee from the room. And he goes, you got more coffee? She's yeah.

I goes, where'd you get more coffee? And she's like, the hotel, I'll call them. He's like, you're fucking amazing, Grace Lilly. I love Austin learning about the amenities of a hotel that if you call down to the front desk, they'll bring you something. It's like, whoa. And then Mia, Brad, and TJ are talking,

and TJ late at night got a wiener tattoo on his wrist. I mean, I appreciate the commitment to your fledgling brand, but maybe wait till you, let's get some sales under your belt before you start tattooing things under your wrists. Yeah, and I like that one of them's like, wow, now you can see your wiener while you're playing with your wiener.

All right. So then, then we're talking about TJ, we're talking about Will and the girlfriend again, it's so boring. So then we go, just because it's like every single day, they just need to catch this fucking guy. I need Mia to just get a hidden camera and find his ass

and find who he's cheating with. Isn't John Quijone's around? Can we get like a hidden camera set up and like a what would you do? Come on, we could make this happen really easily. Yeah, so then we see the after dinner blow up with Will and Emmy, and they're just like, it's just like with us, no one believes us.

She's like, yeah, and he's like, because everyone believes I would cheat and I would never cheat. She's like, yeah. He's like, we're a power couple. She's like, hey, yeah. I also love that Emmy goes, oh my god, I'm like losing my voice.

Like, how am I even losing my voice? And then it comes to her being like, everyone is trying to undrap us. And then you see her late at night smoking cigarettes, like nervous like, yeah, I don't know how I lost my voice. So they're in bed and Will has a legal bad because he's a lawyer. And she's like, yeah, last night was insane. It was just like nuts Like everyone's coming for me all the time is like I just don't know what to say anymore It's like this group is like a pack of hyenas and with a rotten carcass that they just want to devour our relationship is great Okay, I'm going to breakfast with the boys. Bye Lisa she's like

There must be the time I fuck to carcass in the bathroom once. So we go to Viva restaurant, which is funny, Viva, because these guys all look dead and they're at a place called Viva. And they all sit down and Will joins this table. It's the guys, it's Brad, TJ, Joe, and Will. Someone throws a leg at their head. So Will's like, I'm just exhausted. It just feels like everyone's against our relationship

only because I went to our place of business and said this relationship sucks, I hate being in it. Like why is everyone against this relationship? I mean, especially for Austin to say that, like part of my anger is at you guys because I felt abandoned a little bit, but you just didn't like step in. And that's like not what I expected out of friendship.

Like no one's got our backs. Everyone's critical of us. And teacher's like, um, but you know why everyone thought that, right? It's like, are we in loony tune? Like, hello? So then we go to the poolside and Maddie and Emmy are talking shit about, wait.

Oh, well, Mia and Maddie are talking shit. Like, can you believe last night? Oh my God, I can't believe it either. And then Emmy walks up and it's like, oh, hey, Emmy, hey. I know. So do you feel better about addressing the group? Because like, I feel like I'd be so embarrassed

about what was even talked about. And I would like look at my boyfriend, I'd be like, what the fuck, Will? Emmy's like, no, absolutely not. It's not his fault. If anything, it's my fault because I talk about how much fun I have going to the bathroom. And so Will, of course, goes to the bathrooms more than usual and his my enthusiasm

is infectious. So he's often like, Hey, I want to bring someone into the bathroom so you can see how cool the bathroom is. And oftentimes it is girls because it is a feminine place bathrooms are. So he's going to bring women into the bathroom and they will be there for a long time experiencing the joy. So this is not Will's fault. If anything, it's my fault or whoever invented bathrooms. Sorry." And Maddie's like, oh, okay. Well, did you even ask Will if it's true? She's like, it's not true. It's not. It's not true. So then back to the restaurant, TJ's like, um, like the biggest part is like the accusations, like, is this true? And Will's like, no. Okay. Here's what happened. Austin's girlfriend, wait, Austin's girlfriend's brother goes to law school and then he bullied me at orientation

because that's how lawyers are. They're like, look guys, it's a smarter lawyer than us, get him. And then they got me in the parking lot and they beat me. And then they made it up that I was having sex with somebody. What are you talking about? And then I had to go to law school detention and they were like, bet you can't survive this. And then there was a girl and she had like a lot of lice and she had like dandruff and she was like shaking it onto her law school thing. And I was like, she's weird. But in the end, we all kind of bonded, you know? Our parents all suck at the end of the day. That's the point. Thank you, John Hughes. And he's like, yeah, he's bullying me. Like he's going into law

school orientation. He's like, what's up, Bravo bro? And so like I'm being Bravo bullied and they're otherizing me. That's what this is. I wasn't like gay and I wasn't like a POC. So they just had to make something up. So now they call me Bravo boy. And it's just like, I'm like you, this guy,

the smartest thing he said here was, to me it's like they're just reiterating the rumor from last year. Like they saw me on TV, so they're like, he cheated on his girlfriend in a bathroom, and now people are still saying that like it's a current rumor. If he had said that, I think that people

would have been like, oh, that makes sense. Unless some thirsty, and also if he hadn't talked shit about his girlfriend at the beginning of the season, the entire cast. Yeah, let's not get that part Let's not forget about that part. But this whole thing like I went to law school orientation and I was bullied like Like it is some 80s movie like it's three o'clock high or something like that back. I'm gonna beat you up I mean, this is of all the excuses you could have given was that like Biff was coming at you, you know, and your time machine took you back to 1955 and someone started the rumor about

you. I mean, come on. Yeah. So then we go back to Emmy and Emmy is doing the same thing. She's like, guys, someone, someone says of embedding his will. I mean, that's just all it is. You know, like you guys lost schools, different than regular school. They're like really competitive. They're really mean. They object to things a lot. And Austin's girlfriend's brother, he goes to law school with Will and like he's calling a Bravo boy and he's trying to make him look bad. It's bullying you guys. Like people want to tear each other down in law school. Law school

people are mean. The way that they are describing law school, like it is like Cobra Kai has taken it over. And then Mia goes, yeah, I saw Legally Blonde. I get it. And they're like, ha ha ha ha. She goes, no, it's a different animal law school. It's mean. You get shoved into so many lockers there. You have to be so careful. Yeah. So everybody's like, bullshit. That's some bullshit. So Mia's like, oh, wait, so you're telling me this young man in law school, besides like studying all day, is making up rumors about Will and Emmy? I mean, come on. So nobody believes this.

And then we go back to TJ and TJ is like, so how do you feel about you and me right now then? And Will's like, well, I think we're going to work through it because we've been friends for a really long time. I just want to keep moving forth. That's how lawyers say it. I want to move forth. Yeah, let's move forth with that.

So then we go to TJ. Well, the producer is like, so you seem skeptical about Will trying to smooth things over. Yeah, because it definitely feels like Will is just telling us what we want is like. So you seem skeptical about Will trying to smooth things over, is he? Yeah, because it definitely feels like Will is just like telling us what we wanna hear. It seems fake. It just doesn't feel sincere. And like, this is someone that I just don't know anymore.

I guess I'll just have to sell my hot dogs as a solo act now. Will's hot dog is gonna be called who? New hot dog, who dis? So then now they're getting ready to go to dinner. This show is really running on fumes right now. They're gonna need something to happen because this is like episode seven.

It is still about the stupid relationship. So now they go to dinner and Emmy's like and he's like, oh my God, like, I'm so excited to go to dinner because the rumors were totally shut down. I'm like, everybody knows now law schools are mean places. So hopefully I can just enjoy dinner. You know, will is good with the guys. Um, I've, I've called the police. They're going to shut down Molly Ringwald's click at the law school and we're all going to be safe. So with presidential suite, Maddie and Will are helping me and

just like there's some dress that like, and we cannot get into. And then everyone winds up going to a place called Carver's steak for dinner. And they all get some free espresso martinis and everything and they get all this food and now everything the vibe is like much better now they're all getting along getting along nicely. And they have oysters and they're like grace Lily don now everything, the vibe is like much better now. They're all getting along nicely. And they have oysters and they're like, Grace Lilly don't have those because they're an aphrodisiac. Remember how horny you were last night?

You were trying to make out with Brad. And then we cut to the night before and she's jumping on Brad and she goes, put it in my pussy. Yeah. And she says, she's like, oh damn, I would have liked to have gotten a tattoo last night. And they're like, well, what would you have gotten?

I would have gotten wisdom because my shaman says I have a lot of wisdom. Molly goes to that shaman. You don't have a lot of wisdom. Molly goes, yeah, that man is scamming her. Um, wisdom is chasing her, but grace Lily runs fast. Wisdom is chasing her, but Grace Lilly runs fast. So then they're like, they're like, guys, remember when we did this? And so we see them, some of them driving Ferraris. I remember when we did that and we see something on the helicopter ride and grace. He goes, Hey, when you were in the helicopter, did you see the mountain with the three presidents?

Is it three or is it four? And they're like, that's like Mount Rushmore. And it's like, not even in this state. Very slowly really thought Mount Rushmore was outside of Vegas. Yikes. So then Joe is like, other than the amazing trip, like TJ, like I feel like I'm getting your trust back.

Love you for that. And now they're gonna play a game. Michaels brings it up because he's the new so he's like, Okay, let's play a Bravo game. Go around the table and say who you trust the least. Very real Housewives of Miami. So grace Lily's like, Dr. Nicole doctor was like, wait, I'm not even on this show. Great. No, okay, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go.

I'm a very trustworthy person. I really am. So the person I trust least is not me because I trust myself the most. Okay. So Molly goes- I love that that's her answer. Her answer is like, I'm the most trustworthy.

You know what? I don't trust that fourth president that was on Mount Rushmore because honestly I thought there was only three. So a fourth one must have snuck on there. So Molly goes, Grace I would never trust you. She goes, wow for you to say that they so rude. And Michael's just like, whoa this turned like crazy. Yeah who would have thought when you ask a play a game where everyone has to say who they trust the least that would start take a sour turn. So Grace Lily goes, so you heard what happened?

Wait, wait, what happened? I didn't hear something. Okay, so Emmy goes, she's like, well, Grace fucked O'Sheen. And all of a sudden, we have this whole storyline that just falls into our laps. Yeah, so Mattie's like, okay, last year, O'Sheen was roommates

with me and my best friend Eva. And O'Sheen and Eva were like a thing. And Grace is not allowed in my house right now because she slept with O'Sheen. And it's a huge deal because Eva's my best friend and Grace is my best friend Eva and Oceen and Eva were like a thing and Grace is not allowed in my house right now because she slept with Oceen and it's a huge deal because Eva is my best friend and Grace is my best friend and this has caused turmoil in my girl group. How is this not part of the how's Eva not a cast member this season and oh my goodness I'd forgotten about Eva when they when they started mentioning a new person oh I was like please let it be the Clores Leachman girl but it wasn't. So-

And how are you gonna fuck O'Sheen and then get mad that somebody else fucked O'Sheen? That's what O'Sheen is. You can't get mad at somebody for riding the same Lime scooter that you rented on your iPhone 10 minutes ago. That's what they're there for. Grace Lilly pretty much says that in a few minutes.

So she's like, I didn't deny, I didn't lie about it. And she's like, you're, and she's like, Matty, you're so fucking fake. No, she's had your back with those deny, I didn't lie about it. And she's like, you're, and she's like, Maddie, you're so fucking fake. No, she's had your back with those girls. Stop being mean to Maddie. I love her, she's one of my kids. So they start screaming and Grace Lily is like, wow, you guys really hyper-analyzed my life.

I love it. So then we see a flashback of Maddie, Joe and the housemates talking about Grace hooking up with O'Sheen and her supposedly denying it. And then Joe's like, yeah, Grace is unreliable, causes mayhem in our lives, and I can't enable this anymore. I don't see Maddie getting anything from having a relationship with Grace. Okay, Joe, you seem like a nice boyfriend and everything, but you need to back down. You can't be body guarding Maddie. You're not her agent.

It's Maddie's choice. Yeah. It's Maddie's choice what chaotic and toxic people she wants in her life, okay? So, and then I think somewhere in here, Grace Lilly's like, whatever, O'Sheen is for the streets. So Joe's like, guys, guys, guys, we have like, it's our one final night,

and I have a surprise for everyone. Countess Luanda Loesaps. No, Joe. What the other surprise? Oh yeah, okay. So we're gonna go someplace. Everyone get in your cars. They get in cars, and everyone's like,

where are we going? What's it gonna be? Is there gonna be a future? Is it gonna be exciting? Is it gonna be scary? And they're all getting like very nervous, but they just wind up at a wedding chapel instead. Yeah, so this is the part we've all seen in the preview where like, oh my god, did they secretly get married? No, they didn't. He was just like, I want a commitment ceremony,

and I thought it would be wild. So they go to the Elvis chapel and pretend to have a wedding. And Grace Lilly starts crying like it's a real wedding. She's sobbing. She's like, ah, ah, ah, ah. She's like, even though we're in a fight, I still have her back always and forever. So they do this Elvis thing and I guess it's cute, but yeah, they need some stuff to happen on this show.

I mean, I'm happy with the amount of stuff that's happening. I think it's been like really funny, but yeah, this wedding thing was cute, but like unnecessary. I don't need scenes like this. So, but Joe was like, I wanna marry her in real life someday. And so it happens sometimes. It's not gonna happen, she's leaving you.

But I will say it's interesting that on this show, most shows kind of rely on the trip to make things pop. And this show doesn't need the trip. Like this show, I was like, no, they need to be at work. I don't want to watch these people like dancing. Like I need to see them at work getting mad about random things at work. There's something magical about this show

when they're at work. I don't know what it is. Yeah, I agree. I agree. I think it's like these shows, I mean, like Vanderpump Rules, they had some like noteworthy trips, but like the magic happened in LA mostly.

Like you look at some of the Housewives, you're like, okay, get them on an island somewhere so they can come alive. But like these shows, it's like when they're tasked with having responsibility, that's when they go haywire. And so much of this cast is new. I think that they don't have enough mess with each other to be fighting about on trips, you know, and you need that. So maybe like in a year

or two, but I love I still love this show. But yeah, I just need to see them. I don't like seeing them lean. I like to see them clean. That's a perfect way to say it. Well, thanks everyone for being here and listening. Appreciate it so much. Be sure to check us out on Reality with the King, Carlos King, on wherever you get your podcasts and go to watchwhatcrappens.com to get your tickets to see us live later in March. All right, see you later everybody.

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