Watch What Crappens - #278: People’s Couch’s Brandy Howard and Julie Goldman

Episode Date: March 25, 2016

Timestamps below! Brandy Howard (@TheBrandyHoward) and Julie Goldman (@MrJulieGoldman) from The People’s Couch and the Vanderpump Rules Aftershow are here to talk some smack. We recorded in Ronnie’s apartment huddled around a mic on gardening day, so there are (fittingly) leaf blowers and Bueller barks galore. We laughed our asses off drinking Skinny Girl cocktails, and hope you do, too. Timestamps: 0-1:25:55 We talk to Brandy and Julie about their journey to People’s Couch and the Vanderpump Rules Aftershow. Of course, a lot of other nonsense as well. Interspersed are thoughts about the VPR Uncensored Special and Reunion Part One. I would time stamp, but it’s all over the damn place. 1:20:55 RHOBH: Yo’s LymeCademy Award, Dubai, Rinna’s neurosis ------------------- Subscribe at http://www.patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens for bonus episodes, ringtones, and live group video chat parties. For all our other links and extras, go to http://www.watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously. But hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Today we had the absolute pleasure of recording with Julie Goldman and Brandi Howard of the People's Couch and the Vanderpump Rules After Show. We talked to them in the beginning just about themselves and their shows. And then we'll move on to Vanderpump Rules Reunion and Uncensored. And then it's on to Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

We recorded this in my... I'm Ronnie. housewives of Beverly Hills. We recorded this in my, I'm Ronnie, we recorded this in my apartment, huddled on my pleather sectional in the heat. It was hot as hell, and we couldn't turn on the air conditioner because obviously it would be too noisy, but we were just using one general mic,

so we're huddled around it, we're all sweating balls, and of course, as this is Watch What Crap Is, it's Gardener Day, so that fucker passed by here with ten different instruments, all making noise. So I'm sure you're going to be shocked at the level of professionalism in this podcast. As is tradition, we have people over we want to impress, and we make total noisy idiots of ourselves. So thank you, Julie. Thank you, Brandy.

You guys, find them. Watch our shows. They are hilarious. And those are our soul sisters right there. Thank you guys for doing our show. And thank you guys for listening to our show. Enjoy. P.S.

That thumping sound you hear every once in a while is us swinging back skinny girl martinis and then slamming them back down on the table with the microphone classy So welcome, you guys. Oh, hi. Thank you for being in my lovely apartment. It's the first time I've had Ben here. Yeah. And you both here.

I mean, welcome to my home. Welcome. I'm the gay Siri. Thank you for having me. We're all sitting around Ronnie's sectional, sort of like we're in the starting over house. I mean, welcome to my home. Welcome. I'm the gay Siri. They need to add it. We're all sitting around Ronnie's sectional, sort of like we're in the starting over house, you know? Yeah. And we have dealers here too.

Do you guys ever watch Starting Over? Do you remember that show? I remember that show. Wasn't Iyanla Vanzant one of the life coaches on Starting Over? Yes, she was. Yes, she was. She was a pivotal force on that show. Yes, she was.

Yeah. How did, did anybody ever get fixed on Starting Over? No. No. I don't think anybody ever got fixed. I don't think Iyanla's ever got ever fixed anyone yeah that's the thing all she does is make do like very literal therapy i remember watching an episode of starting over where there was that woman jill who was on it do you remember jill no she's like very like large but very large oh okay which actually has nothing to do with the story but i was just trying to paint a picture. And she was having issues

about something, and Iyanla was like, the problem is that you are, like, you are, like, suing yourself, or something like that. So she had Jill

go to court. I saw that one! Yeah, and Della Reese, the judge was Della Reese. Oh my god, I totally saw that. And Jill was on trial. Yes!

It was her former self-defense trial. For her life! For her life. For her life. And remember, it was a mannequin with like a little scarf and a hat

that represented old Jill and new Jill was like prosecuting old Jill. So wait, was the mannequin old Jill or new Jill? I think it was old Jill because she was on trial

for everything. Right. She had to prosecute And Della Reese was the judge and I think Iyanla may have been the lawyer. I'm not sure. I don't remember who was the lawyer. But that was Iyanla's specialty, doing shit

like that. Also like, you know, you have to go to a funeral. Here we are. Oh, it's yourself. Oh, yeah. It's like, oh, what are you going to have to eulogize yourself now? And then there's like all that kind of shit. Yeah, I saw an episode of Iyanla Fix My Life with,

I don't even remember who she was trying to fix, but they said that they were having issues. They were like, well, I had a very painful marriage and, you know, I put that book back on the shelf. And so then the next scene is them in a bookstore. She goes, well, because you put that book back on the shelf, I've taken you to a bookstore. I was like, Yama, how would that fix anything?

Oh my god. So we're sitting around on my sectional and the doors are open so the gardener's out there. So you'll hear that. And so that's very nice. Doing a great job. It always starts. All day long.

It's usually a leaf blower. So I'm glad for the rake. But of course, right when we start, it comes right to the door. It's the sound of Jill's mannequin blowing its way back. So we had to turn off the air conditioning and stuff, so I'm just going to sweat all over everybody.

Welcome to your comfort level. So I want to ask you about your life, guys. How can we fix it you about um i want to ask you about your life guys oh how can we pass them in i've been in rionla fix your life so people's couch obviously how did that come about how did people's couch come about well you oh you know how the show came about how did it come about for you wait but you guys auditioned right yes we did we well we'll get into that in a moment i want to hear about what you guys did you guys auditioned right yes we did we well we'll get into that in a moment i want to hear about what you guys did i'm gonna tell you what how our audition was

i think you probably auditioned on this like at the beginning before it ever came on yes assuming so that was when we did where we've been on since the beginning right you had to do like a skype interview too right yeah yeah but really i always tell this story so everyone's heard it a million times but I'll say it again they sent I'm sure as you guys know it was on like a casting site and so and I don't do those casting sites just because they're annoying

and get me depressed I don't even do social media so I'm certainly not going to read about everything that's casting that I don't have fucking access to and it's usually like West Side Story National Tour no so they sent and it's usually like West Side Story National Tour no so they sent me Julie

and our another friend Johnny they like both sent me the casting they emailed it to me and the casting said didn't say it was Bravo it said you had to watch TV with your friends in your living room for a show where people watch TV. But it was for three weeks for free.

Yeah. Yes. They barely went up by the time we got there. Yeah. No offense. No, no. Oh, yeah, yeah. I think they just...

The person whose house it was got paid. you the person whose house it was got paid we were gonna get a small amount of money to split three ways right over the course of like three weeks where it'd be like four hours a day and i was like that was exactly but basically that's like sounds great i'm in yeah i always work for free yeah the initial casting was like three weeks for free and i was like oh hell no son i was like three weeks for free. And I was like, oh, hell no, son. I was like, delete, delete. Yeah. And so basically I ended up like, Julie will do anything. She's the kind of person that will be offended she's not making $25,000 or will work for free and never say a word. So you never know. She could be making $100,000 and be like, they don't have parking for us.

Weird things will set her off. That's true. So I was like, like had an epiphany and I was like let's just let's just do it and so we ended up it was basically for free I mean after you you know what I mean it was like but the stipend of money was to use your home which I think I don't even know I think we split it but after we filled out like all the forms that we had to fill out, it was like not even worth it. It was like we were doing like a mortgage, trying to get like a mortgage.

But so that was we auditioned. We did the Skype call. Yeah. And then we did. Did we do. Oh, then they came in. Right. Yeah.

Because that's what that's what we did. We did the Skype call. And then they came and we went. We set up at we had we originally had a third co yeah and then they came and we went we set up at uh we had a we originally had a third co-host for like the first year or so so we did it at his place and um they they had like they had like a video so they um uh so they came and then they had like a

sort of like a montage of TV shows we had to watch and we had to react to them getting to the house interview is big like a lot of

that's where we that's where we messed it up well we don't go to enough auditions so you know how in LA every but every audition

you go to they're like that was so good they're like the most supportive mother in the world and you always leave feeling like i always leave feeling like a bug day yeah yeah yeah that's what they did they were like you guys are great you guys are great and then when we talked about the money i remember like so this is how much is like yeah but you know what though you never know you might get a spin-off if you're really popular and i was like don't try to tempt

me with your they did but then you guys did it i was like no one's getting a spin-off people's couch and then you guys went and did it well we didn't get a spin-off but yeah we got opportunities we did that's true you got opportunities asking questions to the Vanderpump Rules people I mean certainly like the first the first three-week run and then even the next one it was all like a twitter competition like who's gonna get the spinoff that was like everyone's thing so then when it became clear it's like not only is no one gonna get a spinoff no one's even gonna make a dollar on this shit but then it was so yeah i mean the vanderpump thing was amazing we were like not expecting it yeah that was that's real that was that's really cool oh so you didn't go to them and

pitch that they came to you and said you want to do it do you want to audition, so you didn't go to them and pitch that? They came to you and said, do you want to do it? Do you want to audition? Oh, shit. So we didn't just get that. We had to go and do a garooling audition. You did? Yes. I figured that you probably went to them and were like, we love this stupid show. We'll make fun of it after. No.

Oh, my God. No. Could you imagine? We pitched everything and nothing. No one wants to make anything that we pitch. Yeah. It was actually the Vanderpump production company, the production company that is Beverly we pitched everything and nothing no one wants to make anything that we pitch no yeah it was actually the Vanderpump production company the production company that is Beverly Hills too that that was like let's do an after show because they do the they do botched and they do it that

botched after show with Heather Dubrow oh botched has an after show yeah yeah what like after botched yeah it's called you're botched again yeah it's something like that it's called... You're botched again. Yeah. I can't remember what it's called. It's something like that. Botched again. Botched and loving it. Yeah. After botched. Still botched. Like, I still botched Paul.

P.S. Paul, Dr. Panassif. Exactly. He didn't fix my fucking nose. I can't remember what it's called. Who cares? Whatever. But Heather Dubrow hosts it. With a chair.

Yeah. By the way, the rake is now on this side. It's a rake. It's a driveway. It's a driveway it's a driveway sir ronnie has like five get a broom get a broom ronnie give me a room uh but uh so when we did our audition we've talked we've told this story many times you He ran away. When we did it, when we did it, he used to come over every Thursday. I don't like that Jewish lady. Yeah. Yeah,

look at me. So when we, when we did our audition, we were like, okay, uh, we're going to be funny. And then they put the TV on and they started showing stuff.

And then the three of us just started talking a mile a minute. We're like, we're like making jokes off of every single thing. It was like an avalanche of banter. And they were like, you think that you lost it because of that? Yes. And then on top of that,

then they also cast like the, like the, the gay guys on it are like really cute, you know, gays. So we think it was a combination of, they got like really cute gays. And then we were also crazy.

I mean, we were deranged. We weren't just like sitting watching deranged we weren't like we weren't like sitting watching no we weren't

because you know I saw the video of the UK show and everyone would just sort of be sitting there and they'd talk you know

we were like no we're not going to sit and talk we're going to be on we're like Shecky we're like da da da da da da da da

no I think that just so you know feel free to still hate Scott, Emerson and Blake we don't know we like we like them no they're so funny but the the this should make you feel better first of all i think you probably did do awesome and i think they did want i'm sure we were we had 50 dogs on us and we're like we drink we'll do anything and now we're stuck three years later have to drink every

show eat tons of chips like we have we're stuck having to do all that shit, we promise, but, um, the thing with Scott and Emerson and Blake is that, particularly Scott,

come back, man, man, yeah, um, he was supposed to be, I don't know if this is a secret or what,

but he was, um, supposed to be Patty Stanger's, oh, like, love, like,

one of her, yeah, one of her, like, assistants, so, yeah, he was, he sort of, I think, had like a... Oh, an Ann and a Monica museum repurposed.

He would not have lasted there. I think that because of that, though, he sort of had like a... Not like an official... Bravo doesn't do development deals. But he had like an unofficial... They knew him. They were like, oh, why don't we just plug him in here? He'll be great.

I literally think the whole entire casting that he... It was based on him. Yeah. Like, it started with him and then just went from there. That's totally possible. So I think it was never yours to lose because of that,

which sucks. Yeah. It was a long time ago. Who cares? Like, it's a totally different thing now. Yeah. And you guys are killing it on there. What's it like doing the Vanderpump Rules thing

when you make fun of, I mean, you guys are, you'll say it right to their face. I mean, I don't know why, why you're so, I mean, before you answer that, before you answer their face I mean I don't know why you're so or you're asking who actually before you answer that

can we do a toast because these are we actually have skinny girl margaritas for the station Ronnie already drank a drink of this so he has bad luck

cheers to being at a live in person podcast I just heard that Bethany speaking of doesn't have to pay alimony anymore oh Bethany's divorce

is final so congratulations to her. What about child support? I don't think she has... Oh, that's different. I'm not sure. But she doesn't need to pay $12,000 a month. Yeah, that's ridiculous.

That's bad for New York, do you think? She's worth like a zillion dollars. I don't think she needs to pay the mortgage anymore either, which she was also paying. Now she doesn't have to be practically homeless anymore. I'm practically homeless. I'm basically homeless. I'm homeless. You're running a limo.

Like literally, I'm homeless. Like literally kill me now. Kill me right now. My walls are up. I'm homeless. I'm going to be crying on the floor if I have to get in the house.

I'm so happy we're drinking this on her day that she's returned to the horse official. I think that must be that it's official. It's a sign. I found this. They were married for two years

and six months or something. And the divorce took two years and three months. Holy crap. I would feel worse if we didn't see scenes of him driving around that stupid skinny girl car with her. And going door to door at the liquor stores and selling the shit. I think that's like someone who did help build it at least. Oh, I was fine with her paying him. I didn't care at all.

I was like, you want to quickly get married to someone you just met, use it to get your own spinoff. He did that show. You constantly humiliated him. I mean, I like Bethany, but I'm like,

that's what you get. Don't meet someone you met on the street and use it to build your whole brand. And then when you're done with him and you realize he's fucking annoying. Yeah. I mean, I do think it's excessive, but I mean, I see both points.

I feel like the punishment seems pretty excessive for the crime. $12,000 a month is a very steep punishment. But either way, I don't care. I don't really care that much. I'm not that invested. But at least we have our Skinny Girl Margaritas. So anyway, before I interrupt it to do our toast because we have our Skinny Girl Margaritas. So anyway, before I interrupted to do our toast because we have our skinny girl margaritas, so tell us about

the Vanderpump Rules after show and like how that, how's that work? He's back with another machine on the other side. This is crazy. He's circling us.

I feel like we're like in the clown car of gardening shit. Don't you feel like we're like in Safari? We're like in the tent and the lions are outside like circling around

like we can't go out of the cabana. Thursday's my gardening day too I like that you made him so fierce the gardener he's so nice well he went

he lost the rake and went and got the blower yeah I know I'm like sir it is almost like five o'clock

why are you still landscaping you know landscaping is only for seven in the morning when you wake up everyone's doing it okay what are you

doing at like five if we record this show at ten in the morning he's here at ten in the morning if we do it at five then I's here at ten in the morning. If we do it at five, then I'm here at five.

Of course. Of course. Now, do you think that we are mean to their face? Not mean, but you don't, I mean, you've got serious balls, I think.

Good, I like that compliment. Because I don't, I mean, when we went to Pump, I was telling Ben the other day, Lisa Vanderpump is like Caesar

kind of in this tent on the side like just kind of she's surrounded by all these like older gay guys holding one of her tiny dogs i was dying i know those guys were intimidating it's a gay ball well with gay guys with me i always feel intimidated because it's west hollywood and like i'm overweight and i'm bald like i don't care until i'm around gay guys. I'm like, oh my God, I lose. But one thing you always win with is age. So I'm old. So I always lose.

But those guys were all older. So I automatically won. So I wasn't scared of them. Plus they were really nice. But I was scared of Lisa. I mean, I did just say, I love you. Kissed her ring. I was like, bunch of problems.

Hashtag bye. You know, pretty much. I was like, I'm out of hashtag bye you know pretty much I was like I'm out of here what's it about you guys she's like darling

did you notice that she had a buzz going Lisa yeah cause even blacked out Sally over here was like I think Lisa

might be drunk and I was like how can you even see out of your eyeballs was she asking inappropriate questions about people's affairs no she does that so often

when did the love story begin, darling? That was the first time we've seen her pump a gazillion times. It's the first time I've ever even seen her with a slight buzz. Really? Ever. But it was late. I mean, it was, what was it? It was late.

It was pretty late over there. It was late. Yeah. That was pretty sloppy. Thank God I had so much time. I can't believe we didn't see James. But I was impressed to see Leah Black's oh and he was saying was he playing was he playing a fresh cut from the pump session

Cuz Eric the bartender pump told us it was his he was back I was maybe there was like a shipment of fireball down the street that he was taking care of. Fireball. That's how the reunion opened. I love Fireball. Cena. Have you guys ever drank Fireball? Fireball sounds good.

Yeah. You can't get, if you're a true Alky and those kids are, you can't even catch a buzz on that shit. And it also does, it does not taste delicious, I think. I think it's just like cinnamon sweetness. Other door. He's at the other door. I think it's just like cinnamon sweetness. The other door. He's at the other door. I swear to God. I'm like, this is ridiculous.

Fireball, my favorite thing to say with Vanderpump Rules is, you're 40. What the fuck? I get it if you're in college. Like, we've all been there. I mean, I didn't go to college, but my sister did. Ew, that water is so dirty in the flower thing. I drank Fireball, but you don't drink that when you're older. Get some vodka.

Oh, now he's over there. Yeah, I'm telling you, the leaf blower, I see it now. I get everything. I understand. Because normally we do this over Skype, and I hear the leaf blower, and you talk about the leaf blower. But now that I'm actually in Ronnie's place, I'm seeing. It's like a running nightmare. They're blowing the leaves from that side to this side.

He comes over here and blows them from there back over to the other side. Yeah. Maybe we should say, when are you going to be done, sir? And he'll go, 15 minutes, okay? How about he just comes on the podcast and explains his methodology of leaf blowing? He won't talk because you know I try and get everybody to be nice to me. I gave him an Xbox. I'm like, so how's your wife?

And he's like, well, he gets all scared. You gave him an Xbox and we're letting him interrupt us? Well, I didn't buy him one. It's all holes. We probably had to spend $500 on the cable so we're missing. So the Vanderbilt Gruels after show. So how far in advance do you guys watch? Do they give you the episodes?

Do you watch them ahead of time? Do you record them two weeks ahead of time or something like that? Yeah, I don't know. Are we allowed to say? I don't know. You don't have to say if it's going to jeopardize the secret. We do watch all the episodes. Yeah, we watch all the episodes. And then we had a break this time in between or there was like a break.

It's your research. And they didn't get to see those episodes and we had to watch them on TV. It was annoying. That's weird. And everyone's cool. Everyone who comes on,

they're like, they're just happy to be on TV. Yeah, yeah. And they all, for the most part, have like a good sense of humor and they all are ready to like,

you know, are open to playing. Yeah. And they all eat a lot of shit. Yeah. And they do. I mean,

we, I don't, a lot of people on Twitter will be like, you don't go in hard enough, but it's like, we're not really, we're not there

to antagonize. Yeah. It's also, what are we going to yell at them? What are we going to, that's what Twitter's for. Exactly. It's also, like, it's one thing when we're doing the podcast and we are we gonna that's what twitter's for exactly it's also

like it's one thing when we're doing the podcast and we get mad we go on a rant when you actually see someone in person and if you start

to rant in person then you're the crazy one not them because it's like what do you it's like I mean they're real people yeah

we are never that disgusted like on twitter this like overwhelming disgust yeah towards them right

that wasn't really ever our thing I mean I I my favorite thing is like all love the I like I loved like Snooki yeah to the to the end yeah people were

like oh and I'm like no no no no no I love Paris Hilton I like the the person that everyone hates I mean I'm disgusted by the Vanderpump rules cast and we

go we go off all the time. But it's like a podcast. But if you met them, you'd be like, oh, nice to meet you. Cool. You would be like, you're so pathetic. Do you have herpes? You're gross. How filthy are you?

Well, I'm in front of them when I meet them. But in a good-natured way. Well, Ronnie's tactic. It's always very funny because Ronnie's method always makes me go like this when we talked about this in the podcast and the world because what he does

is he starts to go in on them and you think just when you think it's about to get like really awkward he pulls back and you realize he's actually complimenting them

so you'll like the time you went to Tom Sandoval and you were like you're like god damn you you know you're so

you know you're so god damn annoying on the show because you are so attractive you make it so hard no i was yelling at him for making shea go to the gym with him oh yeah i was like that every guy does that to a fat guy okay we've all got that friend in la who's like hey bro it's easy to work out man all you have to do is climb this rope and then every guy takes turns climbing to the top of this rope she Shay cannot climb out of bed, okay? You cannot do that to an overweight person.

So that's what I was telling him. Yeah, but at first it looked like you, because you were saying, I can't believe you took Shay to the gym. It looked like you were going to be going in on him for how he treated someone who was dealing with sobriety or whatever. So Tom was starting to get head to head. I had this, I wanted to go like this, and we were all like this. And then you were like and then you brought us

like a compliment oh they know they were with me yeah no no this is I kept telling my sister no I said just in general oh yeah

um I was like I'm gonna ask you man so do you hang out with any of them normal in normal life or just see them

when you're over there before the after show we met um Jack we knew jack's the best and he because he goes to pump and he's cool he was a fan of people's couch um and plus we just love jacks you know but um and then we also knew tom schwartz but now i would say socially we're the most we have the most unfettered access to Sheena. Oh, okay. Like Sheena has invited

us over. Okay. She's super, I mean I always say that she's like the dark horse. I even told her this. Of course she's like the easiest eye roll and she's the one that I think she's the one that you most the good parts of her don't show. Because she's like the easiest eye roll and she's the one that I think she's the one that you most the good parts of her don't show

because she's actually like Julie says like really super thoughtful she's really really nice she's really nice well she said some nice stuff on the reunion you know when they talked about like Shay and his issues and they're talking about how she

got like totally reinventedinvented social media. I don't know what addiction was until Twitter yelled at me. I'm sorry Twitter. But like I'm not, yeah, I mean it was funny, but I'm also not going to take that away from her because I mean how else are you supposed to learn? Like, you know, if people yell at you. No one else learns like that.

Learning from Twitter, that's crazy. I remember during that time, because obviously Sheena and Shay come on the after show, I just remember being like, it's kind of like when people who aren't gay, like, let's say last year, would say something about trans. Yeah.

Like, we watched a trans show on People's Couch, or one show, maybe it was even I Am. Oh, it was the reenactment show. Oh, okay. It was the, it was the,, it was the reenactment show. Oh, okay. It was the... We watched this fucking reenactment show where it was about a private investigator. It was like a detective.

So the private investigator had to go. So somebody came and was like, I think that man was cheating on me. And then the private investigator goes and finds... It's all reenactment. But the whole thing's reenactment. And then they find that the person is being, he is cheating on you. But wait, they would go in,

they went in a bathroom, and they're like, it's so weird. There's a razor. Oh, it's like the mystery. Yeah, there's a razor, like a man's razor. It was like all weird clues in the bathroom. Like, are these women's perfumes? Bueller has an idea.

Yeah. It's like there's a man's razor, but yet there's women woman's perfume something's weird and then it gets towards the end and then Julie yeah

oh and then it was I have some bad news for you he's yeah he has been cheating on you but it's it's not with a woman

it's with a man now no however it was with a trick it was i thought the boyfriend was trans i can't remember oh is that what it was yeah it was like he's not cheating on you the woman's shit around his house is his oh is that the end was trans and julina immediately just went mute like we were like we not going to be a part of this. Yeah. We're not going to say, we're not going to say a fucking word.

This is like Chinatown. It's like, it's my sister, my daughter, my sister, my daughter. It's a man, it's a woman, it's a man,

it's a woman. Right. And a year ago, you couldn't say anything, though. Yeah. But, right? That's what the Vanderpump thing's like. I kept thinking with her,

with addiction, I go, it's just like the thing when a person who didn't know anything about the trans shit would say a dumb ignorant trans comment without even knowing

and it's like you are going to eat shit for saying that and while she was there talking I was like man she's gonna be she's gonna get raked over the coals for this because she doesn't realize how intense people are about that shit. Well, the thing is, though. Just don't be an alcoholic.

Just don't be boring. Have five shots of tequila, no beer. Whatever her rules were. I don't want to be one of those boring, sober people. But, you know, but I mean, but again, I do like. But that is a valid thing to feel. It is. Of course.

But, you know, I did feel. It is. Of course. But you know what though? I did appreciate what she said on the reunion. And I'm not saying this just because you guys are saying how much you like Sheena. No, no. You guys can feel free to talk about Sheena. No, I do appreciate it. Because some people would be like, yeah, I got raked over the coals. They'll just give an excuse.

But she was like, yeah, I got raked over the coals. So I decided to actually look into what the hell I was saying. And I discovered, oh yeah like now I know better you know which I think is like if someone says like now I got like I got a lot of shit for something so I've changed my ways I think that's like an acceptable thing I mean what else are you hoping

to achieve by giving someone shit than to like make them like learn something or like especially on Bravo like the whole point is to be as horrible as you can but the second you say you're sorry, people forget anything. Well, it's like Jax.

I mean, Jax is the best example. Jax knows how to apologize for everything. But I do want to say, to that point, I do want to just say, at the same time, a person is allowed

to feel however the fuck they want without everyone coming down on them and trying to teach them. Now, Julie's back into the trance thing. Trying to teach them even with her just like

you know what if her true feeling was that she was really scared that this guy that she just married was now going to be fully sober and she was afraid that was going to put something in their relationship where she doesn't want to be with somebody who's fully sober maybe that was really happening for her yeah and it came out whatever way. Like, that's valid, too. Like, everyone thinks that they're going to school you on something, and as much as you maybe need to learn to a certain degree, everyone else also needs to take a few seats. And that would be so judgmental.

If we took seats, though, we'd have no podcast. Yeah, and not you. I'm not saying you. I'm saying when somebody comes at you personally specifically it's one thing we can all rant and talk shit and i'll talk shit for fucking days yeah i will never stop talking shit but when i mean we can say that she's dumb and annoying and self-centered and shit like that there's that's like the trans thing addiction is like a it's like a thing with all these rules right like everybody has to follow these Right. And that's why we go

with the Rockies. Right. But I just... But that being said, even though she, you know, obviously is entitled to the way she feels,

she probably could have chosen a better choice of words than saying something like, well, I don't want you to be boring, you know, because that's like,

that implies some shame. better life choices. Exactly. There's tons of things that go into that. I actually am a little concerned about Sheena. Because, and I actually, I don't like to go into physical things, whatever. But I'm concerned that she's too skinny. Did you notice that?

She looked a little too skinny for me on the reunion. And I hope that that's not a problem. She's really tiny. Because she's already petite. Have you seen her? Have you seen her over there? I call it like Disneyland. She was my waitress.

There's always Goofy who has to take a picture with you or whatever. James. Right. She's streaking and streaking. She's so little. And I don't mean skinny, like anorexic. She's literally like a little tiny elf with this long hair. She looks very different

and relaxed she's very pretty she's very pretty she's very petite I thought on the reunion I was a little concerned and I'm not even being snarky I thought she looked too skinny

and I each time we saw her she was tinier and tinier because yeah she's super like little I don't know that she's short yeah she's a little petite girl

you know so it's like she's like shrinking shrinking shrinking yeah huge features huge eyes huge eyelashes tons of hair and you're like whoa man it's like, she's like shrinking, shrinking, shrinking, shrinking. Yeah. Huge features, huge eyes,

huge eyelashes, tons of hair. And you're like, whoa, man, it's, I think she's prettier in person. I think so too. But I think,

I'm worried more about their faces because they're just getting ridiculous with their faces. Jax has looked different in every episode and he hit,

it's unfortunate that he has like facial dysmorphia, I think. I have like the reverse where I never know like facial dysmorphia, I think. I have like the reverse where I never know I'm getting fatter. Like I think too highly. But I think he never like really sees when it's right. Because there was one moment this season, towards the end, he was doing his testimonial shots.

He looked stunningly amazing. I think he had like a little skinny mustache or something. And his face, like it settled. I think like the last surgery settled. Like it all just settled down. And his face, like it settled. I think like the last surgery settled into the, like it all just settled down and it looked perfect. And then now he's looking like a,

you know, a beanie baby or whatever. Well, I was like, I was this season, like even in, maybe not, no,

probably the after show too. I was like, maybe he's sculpting his eyebrows too much and his hair's too dark. And then I realized, he's got great hair by the way. I want to, I want to give props to his hair. But I think maybe he's sculpting his eyebrows too much and his hair's too dark and then I realized that great here by the way I want to give props to his hair but I think he's probably getting like a couple of great he's like you know he's like I don't know he's like 37 or something guys can start getting gray like anyone start getting gray in their 30s I know his hairs he seems to be

dying his hair so I've told Julie like I mean I'd have to pause and be like okay his eyebrows are too sculpted he's filling them in too much his hair's too black he needs to go back the way it was first season and he maybe just whatever like maybe yeah 10 15 pounds exactly so then I saw the the fucking uncensored thing the eyebrows were so sculpted I mean I was dying I was like whoa the eyebrows that's what I get the uncensored thing I'm glad you brought that up. So why don't we start talking about uncensored? I guess we'll talk about uncensored. We'll talk about the reunion and then we'll talk about Beverly Hills. Does that work for everyone? Yeah. When you have to go, you have to go. I figured we'd start with pump rules.

We don't want to. Do people like to listen to us this long? Are they like, oh. Yeah, because people have commutes. Three hours. People have commutes. people are at work people listen and you know what I always say is you can always

fast forward you know it's not like it's a live broadcast you can always just scroll up to where you want to listen to

trust me they do but um wow I thought Vanderpump Rules Uncensored season one

was amazing loved it it was just as good as the Beverly Hills one oh my god just as good I agree it was first of all it also made me sad because again at the risk of sounding totally judgmental

it's gonna happen this is i don't like to say this from comments but it has to be said because it's just the elephant in the room they've all gained so much weight i mean she's not even chubby but the difference between her when she was eating cigarettes for breakfast lunch and dinner i mean like i could not believe like how skinny she was at one time she just she doesn't look fat at all we just saw yesterday she's normal oh yeah but it was like i didn't even watch season one so for me that uncensored was like the business Julie's the one who watched season one she was all into it I'm like what is she thinking then I watched the reunion and then it was on after that so actually I think I watched the reunion of season two then I sat in the same place and watched the entire season of season two season two is amazing amazing so I

missed that whole thing with that crazy girl, but I was proud about her. Oh, I can't believe that was season one. Yeah, when Andy Cohen said that Laura Lee, was it Laura Lee? Yeah. When he said that she was the unsung hero of season one, I was like, thank you.

Because she was. She came in. Thank you for having sex with me without condoms. Or whatever. So that little boy. She came in. She came in. She came in. She was like an ingenue.

Stassi, like, unleashed all of her hatred on this girl. And she sort of had to take it. And then, after all, she took it. She stood up to Stassi. And then Jax, like, dumps her after she pours her heart out to him about, like, her addiction issues. He dumped her right after the AA meeting. That was terrible he's like whoa whoa whoa this is you know uh i think i gotta take a step back she's sitting they're sitting on a curb that looks like literally right outside your

apartment yeah they're like well thank you they're in east hollywood they're in there they're in front of the street mall okay yeah literally i was like is that gower i was like okay so they're sitting on a curb he's breaking up with her right she can't believe they just It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. It's not that far from here. Literally, I was like, is that Gower? I was like, okay. So, they're sitting on a curb. He's breaking up with her, right? She can't believe it. They just went to an AA meeting, which was tragic.

It's like, isn't this fucking supposed to be anonymous? Whatever. Fine. He's literally, did you guys notice he's like this? I rewind it a hundred times. He's like this.

He's hitting something off of his arm. Like, she's crying, and he says, whatever, I think we should take a break. I don't know if I can be with someone with this whatever and then he's like says Jack's the kleptomaniac like drug user pregnancy maker yeah literally he's like trying to get like doesn't care And thus began the tradition of nobody understanding rehab.

Yes, exactly. It goes back. It's part of the tradition. It's history. But think about it. To be, well, they're not young. But, like, to be youngish here, especially, I mean, they're in this neighborhood. They all have to get plastic surgery when they're, like, starting at 25.

Their faces look fucking crazy. They're all doing shit. They're all at such different levels of being fucked up and i'm always trying to guess the drugs you know that's like met you got the meth the coke do you think anyone's doing tweak really yeah you do yeah crystal i think so really because everybody's doing that around here and people will tell you do you want some coke and you're like yeah and then before you know it you're up for five days and wanting to fuck a phone pole. I've been there.

You know, like, once you see it, you know, you kind of see it. James, I think. Well, accidental crystal. Accidental, well, that's how I've done it.

Yeah, well, that's how we've done it. Twice. And then we try it. Now I kind of know. James, that kind of makes sense. James, I believe, so I don't know enough about meth or coke or oh that's so cute no i'm like i'm like i'm like nice but i don't but i don't in terms of that

like i wouldn't i know like the obvious signs that crystal like it's really twitchy but like i don't know the subtle signs i know the signs of course, when someone's on it, you're like, get the tweaker out of my fucking face. Yeah. But I really do know the signs of what someone looks like who participates.

Oh, with meth mouth. Yeah, and also skin. Not even just the standard. It's hard to tell with fillers, though, because you don't, they can avoid the meth face. I believe that James

does coke. Unless they all have a whole grill of porcelain teeth on them, so you can't tell that way. I believe that James does coke. That's my guess. I certainly hope they all do coke yeah they all do i hope they do it's like a really obvious like i think he does cocaine

hey you guys i think you're doing pot on the cocaine i've had enough of this restaurant i mean how many leaves are there out there? This is us blowing cocaine right now. It's another machine coming around. The most professional podcast on the internet. I mean, there's not even a tree back there. They're literally blowing the dust. I mean, how many times do they have to blow it up? I don't have to get out of here, guys.

This is so fucking terrible. I loved it with the um on the uncensored oh wait can i say one one thing because i was thinking about the blower out there yeah the meth stuff the reason some of the the signs that you can tell one of the side effects and i learned this from doing my research on the internets because i write uh real housewives of beverly hills recaps too for my website and I write these big long things.

So when Brandi Glanville told Kim Richards at least I'm not doing crystal meth in the bathroom all night, bitch! That's a good sign. I looked up crystal meth and one of the side effects

one thing that all these people have in common is stealing. It's like a weird shoplifty thing because there's some rush that they get off just going and stealing shit.

And like mechanics. And so that's what mostly makes me think with Jax because he is such a klepto. I knew for the, but by the way, for the record,

I knew, and Brandi Glanville takes it back now, officially, the crystal meth thing. She's like, I had just gone to like a,

oh, she hangs out with a lady from Dr. Drew. You know how that's that lady? Oh, yeah. Jimenez. Jennifer Jimenez.

Yeah. So she's like my friend and blah, blah, blah. She literally told Julie and I, like, I had just been with my friend who, you know, whatever. That's the reason I said that. And I was like, no, no, no. The reason you said that was because Kim Richards was doing Crystal in the bathroom. Yeah. The whole season.

With that weird guy. And the number one first sign of Crystal is that you'll never come out of the bathroom. And you look like that Britney Spears. I always bring this guy up with the guy that like took over Britney Spears' mind.

Sam Lofty. Oh, yes. You remind me of him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He was like that. With like the soul patch strip. Yeah, and this guy took over Kim Richards.

But I'm telling you right now the number one sign of Crystal Mouth is the first most important sign is you never want to leave the bathroom. And she would never leave the bathroom, remember? Yeah, that's true. She would stay in there for hours. She couldn't get herself out of any bathroom.

Now, I spent a lot of time in the bathroom, but that has more to do with just digestive. Yeah. I do too. Just the hours. He spends it in the Camille Grammar way, the IBS way. The national spokesperson for IBS. Did you guys see, here He spends it in the Camille Grammar way. The IBS way. The national spokesperson for IBS. Did you guys see? Here's a little thing on Camille Grammar.

You must have seen this. One of Julie and I's good favorite pastimes we like to do is stalk Leah Black's tweets. Yes. I saw that. You saw it. I'm going Camille. Well, how about this, Donald Trump? I like when she tells a lot of Donald Trump on Twitter. Yeah. Well, she... So, based on a stalking of Camille. Well, how about this, Donald Trump? Like, I like when she tells a lot of Donald Trump on Twitter.

Yeah, well, she, so, based on a stalking of Camille, I mean of Leah, we came across a tweet from Camille Grammer saying, if whoever sends me the funniest tweet will get, what would, specifically did she say, like a treat from my home? She was going to give him her assistant, Dee Dee. Yeah. Does she have an assistant named Dee Dee? Yes. Oh, right, the lady She was going to give him her assistant, Dee Dee. Did she have an assistant named Dee Dee? Oh, right. The lady that was in the hot tub? Maybe a giant martini glass.

No, she said she was going to send a special treat from her house to you. And then didn't Leah say, DM me? Yep, that's what I said. It's a private joke. It goes down in the DM. Be careful, they can sue you.

Give them a hoverboard. Why would you cross the road? Why would you cross the road to catch a black gal on? Blame me. Blame me. Oh, I can't. Oh, there are many times. You're creeped out.

The lights just flipped on. They go off whenever the gardener turns off his tools. The lights all come on in here. So one thing that was really funny to me about the Vanderpump Rules Uncensored special was the little segment devoted to the debut of Ariana, who is in season one as one of Sheena's backup dancers. That was good. Of moments of that thing, I thought that wasena's backup dancers. That was good. Of moments of that thing,

I thought that was the pinnacle. That was. And she refused to be seen on camera. She was like, get out of my fucking face. She's like,

I am taking class at UCB. Get those cameras the fuck out of my face. You're ruining my sketch comedy brand. You're ruining my game. And literally,

the producers are like, I mean, the producers, and more than one, are like, that was actually the hardest shoot I've ever done. That was the most unwilling person I've ever tried to film in the history of reality. Like, really? You've never come across anyone else?

I mean, she's like this with all her hair over her face like this. It's like, why are you even there? Yeah, why? Exactly. But then they went on to say that she had already fucked Tom. Yes. I love that. In that thing of Vanderpump, at this moment, present moment, I live for the fact that they still won't admit they hooked up. Yeah. People still blame Kristen. That entire season was based on Kristen literally losing part of her mind. Yeah.

Part of her mind is Whitney Houston gone from trying to convince the world that they hooked up and still no one believes it. They don't admit it. And then even on this thing, they're like, oh, Tom and Ariana had already, like,

fucked or whatever. Yeah. So that's why she didn't want to be on camera. But still, people will be like, Kristen's crazy. She just accuses them, but they didn't do it.

And they won't admit it. They will never, ever, ever admit it, ever. Kristen's like, were you guys hooked up? And he's like, Kristen, I still meet people

every day. I go to Target and I meet 10 people you fuck when we're together. She's like, whatever. And then Andy's

trying to help Kristen. He's like, well, were you more upset because he had an emotional affair with Ariana? She's like,

yeah, that's what I meant. You know what I loved in the special? There was like this one woman, she was like a camera operator or something oh i know you're gonna say that was the second best part you could

tell she hated this gig she had to take this gig for money and she's like they're just everywhere they're just fucking awesome i'd rather just like be out watching animals tear each other out and i texted julie this she goes, she goes, Tom Sandoval has no sense of humor. He literally, literally, the way I bring it, literally,

has no sense of humor. He might as well be German. I was like, I texted Julie. I was like, oh, quote of the fucking century. I'm so in love with that.

Well, what's funny also, if you compare this to Beverly Hills Uncensored, like Beverly Hills Uncensored, they were just talking about like the family drama and we caught this

and we watched this and it was great we saw this thing unfold and this one the producers were like all of them were kind of like we didn't really want to be there they were like

they're like fucking next to us in the dressing room and you can see them all like ugh this was the worst shoot I ever went on in my life there was like no sense of pride about having been involved

with this whatsoever because what is that show the whole first season we were doing our podcast then too you shut up season, we were doing our podcast then too. You shut up, Bueller. We were doing our show then and Ben and Matt, our former bestie,

just loved that. And I was like, I cannot, because I was a waiter. I was like, I do not want to come home and watch other waiters. I hated it.

That's why I didn't watch it. The first three episodes, I hated it. If you go back and you listen, I was like, this show is awful. It's just about the douchebags that hang around Hollywood

that we all see and know. It's awful. It's celebrating awful people. It's giving them a platform. I hate this show. I hate this show. It's true. But then by episode three,

I was like, I'm addicted. And then by the time the season was over, I was like, this is probably the best show I've ever seen. By the end of that first season.

The thing about that Uncensored was that I loved how Stassi was like like what's this gonna be about like she's like says in the interview I mean I'm like what the fuck why would anyone watch this

what's this gonna be about me and Jack's fighting and then immediately the very first scene she's like picks a fight and it's clearly a fake fight orders four drinks

and I can just see I'm like she is like the architect I mean she's so strategic she's so smart she's so funny i mean that's why she's the queen of that show because yeah she masterminded all that shit but she made a huge mistake which is that she decided to go after lisa can't do that she's doing it i know and it makes me sad because seeing stassi like classic stassi it's like you hate and love

her because i remember i hate i used to hate her oh my god It's like you hate and love her. Cause I remember I hate, I used to hate her. Oh my God. I was like, I hate this bitch. But by the end of the season, I was like, you know, but you secretly love her. But now that she's sort of turned into this like sideline.

I asked her on the after show, I was like, didn't you consider not doing this tragic apology tour? Did you for one second consider like, just come back, make up with Lisa, like fuck Eric at pump. Yeah. Get a new book, come in a for one second consider like, just come back, make up with Lisa, like fuck Eric at Pump, get a new book,

come in a side door and be like, I'm not apologizing to anyone, I'm kicking ass and taking names and she was like, nope, I really truly

wanted my friends back and we were like, well, I think it's fine, I think it's fine. If she wants to do an apology tour, that's fine.

No, I hate apology tours. Well, if it's what it takes to get her back into classic form, but you can't do an apologies tour and then still bash tours. Well, if it's what it takes to get her back into classic form. But you can't do an apologies tour and then still bash Lisa. Like, you have to know, like, quit while you're ahead.

No, they are done with Lisa. Well, she's stupid. Lisa's the boss. You can't fuck with Lisa. We will do whatever. Stassi needs to do all of them. When you say they are done with Lisa, you mean all of them? Well, Kristen, Stassi.

Both, yeah. Kristen. Yeah, are done. Kristen. Yeah, and then obviously. Yeah, Kristen still shows up there for free drinks every five nights of the week and starts yelling.

We asked Katie on the after show. I'm done with ISIS. I'm so over ISIS. Well, congratulations. What does that do for you? Hey, guys. I want to tell you the catch of the day. It's me, okay? Order it. Kristen Casino.

it's me okay we'll order it Kristen Casino okay so um she well obviously Kristen and Stassi's with Kristen she's not going to leave her behind but we asked Katie like would you um aren't you concerned that Lisa Vanderpump is going to be annoyed that you're

all close with because Lisa Vanderpump is going to be annoyed that you're all close with because Lisa Vanderpump is annoyed that Katie is let Stassi back in because it was her decision she told her flat out

and Lisa's still annoyed don't be deferential to her and she's like I don't know what that is but these girls these girls are dumb because you know what

they're borders like that the whole reason why Lala is there this season is to breed the next generation so if these people become too... They know that there's a war and a faction. It's like the young kids and the old kids. And that the new people

that come in, too, the producers have more control over. Way more control. Like, they don't... Other kids, they're not told what to do. That's real drama. They film 10 a year. The problem with Katie, Kristen, and Stassi,

and Jax, and the Toms, I think at this point they're a little too aware of like, of like, how they come off a little bit

or how, what's going on with the cameras because the shit that's going on down this season with them is really not

on the same level as it was season one, season two. In season one, season two, they would just like, fuck each other and they would like, lie to each each other be mean and now they just sort of have like little indiscretions but they are like you can say see that they are like being good they're on best

behavior katie's not drinking on camera anymore and so it's like they've also aged i mean not really in the face but they're like been four years they're operating on like dog years they've grown up they're not interested where we want Stassi and Jax to have this chemistry and still think about fucking each other

like in real life you really get the feeling that they're like not feeling it like before they all wanted to do that and now they just don't want to

it's not interesting to them there's also no Queen Bee there anymore like on the on the waiter level Sheena and Katie are trying but but Katie... No one is going to take you seriously holding

a tray of salt and pepper shakers while you're yelling at them, okay? Did you see that Jezebel described Katie... Jezebel described Katie... They were talking about why Vanderpump Rules is like the greatest show in the history of TV. And they... This was like last week. And I believe they described Katie as a

bland blob. They called her like a bland blob and they're like first season she's just a bland blob but now she's like she speaks up more but she's still just more of a bigger blander blob that's so rude I mean bland but not a blob that's not bad

the first and second seasons though were that was the greatest reality show in the history of reality shows oh 100 went in and the drama and the cheating and the crying and it was real i mean it was real it wasn't fake no and even now like whatever you know i still i thought the lala with the tits out i was kind of digging digging that. It was fine, but it's not, to me, the best episode of the season. By the way, Ryan, do you want Do you want to see if it's still recording since you moved it? I want to make sure that the cable didn't get

disconnected or whatever. Oh, yeah, yeah. Just check on QuickTime to see. I thought that the best episode of the season for me was the Gay Pride season. That, to me, was the closest to, like, season one or season two, because that was when you had James, who just season that to me was the closest to like season one or season two because that was when you had that was when you had

James who had just like fucked the random girl who looks like Anne Beal from Rest of Development and like he's Lauren

and he's acting like he and Lauren are both acting like they didn't fuck the night before and he's like kissing on Lara and then when

Lala finds she finds out because something with Kristen right Kristen gets mad Kristen's being annoying about something someone walked in and said oh who told Lala because Lala and Kristen were being buddy buddy remember because that was

I thought Lala and Lauren were standing at the hostess stand and someone told Lala but then later on if I remember correctly Lauren was like I'm with you girl that guy's a jerk and then someone came right up and told who was it? No, because if I remember correctly, which, again, I might not. Which you probably do.

At this time, remember, Kristen and Lala were sort of allies, right? Because Kristen had put Lala through a chest the episode before, being like, well, James came over and was like, voting me last night. And Lala was like, ew, fuck you, James. And Kristen liked that. Remember? Yeah. So I think that like

Lala and Kristen were being buddy buddy about something and then that prompted James to be like well guess what I fucked no one last night

something like that right? Oh James probably No I remember now he walked up to the hostess stand and she said she looked at his arm and she's like who did that?

Who did that? Who did that? And he's like what is it? We're not exclusive darling we're not exclusive which her dumb ass did just say like yeah don't try and whatever yeah so he told her he told her right that was the lauren who is the absolute like unsung hero yes he said did my favorite move the old get the fucking camera out of my face rip the microphone off

but there was some stuff that happened before that I forget gosh I wish I could remember exactly how it played out but basically I think James told Lala that he slept with Lauren to get back at Lala because Lala was maybe

flirting with Jack Lala was flirting with Jack Lala's all over Jack she said how did my tits look and then she went up to the bar and he's cracked out she was flirting with Jack oh here's what it was

she was flirting with Jack to make James jealous because James had come over with the scratches so she was flirting with Jax to make James jealous because James had come up with the scratches. So she was flirting with Jax so then James as retaliation to that, he was like,

well, guess what? I fucked no last night. And so then she's like, fine. So she goes in to like Antonio. Goes and tells him who's at the party.

And it's like, by the way, yeah, a hot one. Anthony, Anthony, Anthony. I like how he made it Antonio because he does look like kind of Mexican. And I like how you made it Antonio. He's very Antonio. He does look like kind of Mexican.

And I like to mention on this podcast that every now and then he runs shirtless down Hollywood Boulevard and I really enjoy that. He is like when I've gone into like Sir, he's legit at the bar with Jax. He is. He actually works. So anyway, so then he goes to Lauren and then that's when she was like, okay, like out of my face. But I was like, you are so stupid.

This was your moment to become a full time cast member no we interviewed her she's not feeling it she doesn't want to and it's amazing and we literally

were like this we're not worthy thank you for not being a thirsty tool yeah as a person in life she did the right thing as a potential reality star she did the wrong thing

yeah she's not into that show she only they didn't think she'd even do the after show but what made that episode so good was that that was classic Vanderpump Rules thing where people were sleeping with each other Potential reality star. She did the wrong thing. Yeah, she's not into that show. She doesn't want to. They didn't think she'd even do the after show. And then I don't know why she did it. But what made that episode so good was that that was classic Vanderpump Rules thing where people are sleeping with each other and then they make each other jealous and then they get back at each other.

And it's like this whole thing where that drags in every single person in the cast. And it proves that everyone at Sir is still all fuck. Yeah. It's not on the show anymore, but they still do. But that was like the only time this season that we really saw some of that like soapy drama like really really soapy drama. Well they're going to have

to get some new young people in because now people are getting married and are adulting. Yeah you know what everything with Tom and Katie I hate that term adulting. You're 40.

Everything with Tom and Katie every time there was like a scene of them it was just like a snooze fest. I'm sorry. Tom seems like a really lovely guy. Katie seems actually

very sweet. But God. I mean I miss him throwing drinks on her. Thank you. I'm sorry. Tom seems like a really lovely guy. Katie seems actually very sweet. But, God. I mean, I miss him throwing drinks on her. Thank you. I was like, we were supposed to get once a season, he's supposed to pour a drink on her. Yeah. Everyone's growing up. I love Stassi's pride at how horrible she is. They're showing

these clips and I'm censored of Stassi just being terrible. And she's like, ha ha ha. Yeah, that's right. I was the queen. Literally. Oh no, I love like I don't know what I've done to you. This was not that bad. I don't's right I was the queen literally oh no I love like I don't know what I've done to you this was not that but I don't know

what I've done to you but I'll take a pinot grigio yeah that's one of her best lines that's the best what I loved hearing

about how people would were intentionally like booking tables intersection to tell her that she couldn't

handle it she was crying yeah that was perfect. That's why people don't want to be on the show because they see what it's like. Stassi has to go to work while she used to. And people would, like a whole group of girls, ask for her just so they could yell at her the whole time.

Ariana told us that we didn't know because we've obviously never, ever once we'll sit and read Leah Black's tweets all the way back to 2014 but we've never once looked at any banner pump like tweets yeah but she told us ariana like the first after show like she's like the level of hate you won't believe and then she's like it it doesn't even matter they're showing something innocuous and i'm like oh you mean like when they did the close-up

on the lube that wasn't innocuous that was the best remember when they did the close-up on the lube that was the second best part of the wholeube? That wasn't innocuous. That was the best. Remember when they did the close-up on the lube? That was the second best part of the whole entire series. In Tom Sandoval's house, the crusty bottle of lube. So badass. So what they try to pretend is like swag that he got free somewhere. I don't even know. Why was that half used in the corner?

I don't know. I don't love anal. I'm okay. So basically, she said they'll just show like the corner of the apartment and it'll be 900 tweets on how gross she is, how gross her carpet is, how dare she live. Like when she spilled paint on the carpet. God. And then we saw it was, like, the level of, like, negative about every detail of them. Every detail.

Everything from their physical appearance to where they live, to how they act, to their whole entire extended families. It's gross it's so dark like that's why i could never be a reality star actually because they're like over the past like 10 years or so there have been like random moments where like there's a potential like i remember one time a casting director for the amazing race had approached me like in 2003 and seemed really cool but you when you go on those shows on any reality show I mean the amount of ridicule you open yourself up to us okay and like I fully admit that I can like dish it but I really can't take it you know I can't take it at all I'm a typical bully I start crying the second season I walk right away

I start crying the second you say something I walk right away me too he said I have a hunchback well I met Jax and I should ask him if I ever see him over there but I'm pretty sure it was Jax I met in a commercial class he was 24 I'm 4 years older than him

and he was young I mean drop dead he was so gorgeous and I smoke and so I would be out there smoking. He didn't, but he would come out and talk to me. And there was this really hot gay guy who works at the Abbey now, or he did a couple years ago.

And we would always go talk during break. And he was working at Abercrombie's. He had the hat. He was like one of the shirtless dudes in underwear that stands out there and greets people. It's like the Applebee's person, but in a Applebee's greeter, but in short shorts. Now that you say that,

it just seems like that job was invented for and by Jax. Yeah. The first one that ever did that job. It's like, hey guys, can I just go stand up? Shouldn't I just go stand up? I got my shirt on.

Yeah. And like, we can look on his Wikipedia. It's like, invented the Abercrombie job. It makes so much sense. Like, so much sense.

Everything makes sense. He was telling me during one smoke break that Someone from survivor came up to him one of the casting people and was like, hey Would you like to be on survivor which they actually do over that a lot that they just walk up the hot people Because there's so many seasons of it and he was like my agent wouldn't let me because I mean reality shows, you know, right and he was like my agent wouldn't let me because i meet reality shows you know right and here we are here we are yeah i had the money well i remember when reality tv became a thing and there was talk about like could there ever be like a celebrity version of big brother or whatever like no what celebrities are gonna find to do that and now it's like celebrity everything you know yeah i think there's certain shows that get more hate and and I think Vanderbilt's at the top of the...

I think when people on shows, when people put themselves in the position of, I'm hot, I'm sexy, I'm cool, I'm popular, that opens you up to more hate than anything else. Absolutely. Even though people become obsessed with it. Yeah. Because we want to watch.

Like, Jack's... Jealousy. Jack's just him alone. People become obsessed with him. You know, like, obsessed to the point where it's like, I fucking hate that. I fucking hate him. I would never fuck Jax or whatever.

But you know, you can all fuck him. Yeah, you all would. You're just yelling, I love you. If you can even yell I hate you, what you're really yelling is I love you. Here's the thing with Jax. I mean, we make fun of Jax so much on this. I mean, we say he's disgusting whatever but if you really watch the show you can see how charming he is and he's actually like very funny he makes like a lot of like funny

jokes all the time on the show but like what's the fun about talking about how funny Jax is let's talk about like all his disgusting behavior too yeah well totally you want that's you can totally see how you would charm someone's pants off. You want to watch a bunch of people cheating and crying and fighting and drama. But you're right

about the sexy thing because Stassi just told us we don't watch The Bachelor because we have pride. And it's like 10 hours long. I ain't watching that either. Get out of here with your 10 hour show.

But Stassi told us that there's been like three or four suicides. Mm-hmm. And in reference to Lala being like, um, unstable more so than the rest of them that she feels like she thinks that she comes across hard or whatever,

that she could actually be one of those unstable people that went faced with the literally like copious amounts of hate that they get. And especially being the fact that she then did the unthinkable, which was go and watch what happens live and act like a total and utter fucking moron boob troglodyte tool like no one asked back and no but no one's ever done that in the history of watch what happens live and and at that point it's not just vanderpump haters that are going in on you it's andy cohen fans and those people are rabid and they went after her and i love how she thinks that she's like unstable and could possibly go the way of the crazies on the bachelor who then i guess apparently commit suicide which who knew i

didn't yeah a few of them have committed you know the thing is real now that's a show it's about the bachelor yeah the thing the thing with the thing with lala oh that's what the jezebel article was about i think the jezebel article was talking about how lala is like the greatest the the new star of vanderpump rules and she's in a i don't think she greatest the new star of Vanderpump Rules and I don't think she's the new star but she's definitely like the next she's the future

of the show she's like the Kristen Cavallari to Elsie you know but she she's that dude from the next Star Trek

with the banana clip on his eyes you're like what I just feel like Julie knows his name what is it Julie I don't I don't know

what you're talking about he's not the guy with the weird thing on the front of his head no my friend is obsessed my friend is obsessed with Star Trek

and my favorite thing to do is to mix up Star Wars intentionally mix up Star Wars and Star Trek terminology and he gets so mad

or if I say something like oh there's Captain Uhura and then he'll be like it's Uhura I say it to Julie I'll go Star Trek and she won't she'll just but she doesn't ever correct me but to herself she'll be like, it's a whore. I say it to Julia, I'll go, Star Trek, and she won't,

she'll just, but she doesn't ever correct me, but to herself, she'll be like, it's a whore. That's what my friend does. I go, I go,

oh, there's Admiral Picard. He goes, it's Captain. You're doing exactly what my friend does, exactly the same thing. She'll set you up. I don't get the Star Trek stuff.

Oh, no, no, by the way, no one does. and that's the, that's the man inside of you that gets it so deeply. You know that? Right.

We need to join. Join in spirit. I don't know what it is. I know. I don't know. I don't want to dork anyone out, but I like sci-fi. Resistance is meaningless. Resistance is futile.

meaningless. Resistance is futile. But Lala, I don't think she's that much of a breakout star. She really hasn't done that much, but I'm really attracted to her insecurity. Jax, I think that's why. I don't find him to be all that charming. He's hurting himself so much

in the face, but it's things like where he feels the need to poop on camera. Or that he's he's hurting himself so much in the face but it's things like where he feels the need to poop on camera yeah or that he's always trying to get his dick in the shot he's always trying to get his dick in the shot like that kind of neediness is a whole different level that i just find so refreshing and you know what i love a gorgeous person that hates themselves you know what you know what lala is like if we may like piggyback onto all this sci-fi talk for a moment Lala is basically like Anakin Skywalker or Kylo Ren

like she has this great power to take over the show but she doesn't really know how to control it and she's like if she's not careful she's going to go to the dark side you know she is like many times she is like, many times she is like very heroic, and you're

like, yeah, we're rooting for you, Lala. Yes, Lala. You like, take down the bitches. Take down Katie or whatever. You own your sexuality. She's like very up front. You know, she's like, whatever. I like to flirt, whatever. But then she sometimes does things, you're like, oh, Lala, you're trying so hard. You're doing so hard. You're losing it now.

You're losing it. You know, at the end of the day, she's just going to end up stabbing some hot old person that didn't deserve it. Just like that. Just like that hot. What was the thing? Kylo?

Kylo Ren. Spoiler. No, I'm just kidding. Too late. It's ironic that they, they will, as far as like the Stassi,

Kristen, Katie team, they are like against her. So that, and that would include now Brittany and Jax. Because obviously Brittany definitely hates her now. Because of all that. So that whole team hates her.

And then she does have James, Tom, and Ariana on her team. Which is good. Tom and Ariana ain't going to call you back. They're too into themselves. And James doesn't even remember who's team he's on. At least she does have Tom and Ariana. Because my first advice would have been get an ally which she didn't even try to do that only accidentally what's your faith exactly exactly but she I mean the irony is that they hate her so bad

but but no but there would have been probably nothing without her other than Stassi's apology to her and then that she's gonna be the the thing with the next season but that's every in the first season that's like tradition that, in the first season, that was like tradition that started in the first season. Because Sheena, Stassi and those girls were so, so mean to Sheena. For no reason. So she boned some, like, D-list celebrity while she was married. Who didn't? It's less apt.

Because she was new. Because, yeah, she came from Villa Blanca. We don't know, who is that? Why is she on this show? This is our show. I is that? Why is she on this show? Yes. This is our show. I love that. And I'm sorry.

They didn't. Did they? They said they didn't audition for that show. They didn't show the audition. No, they auditioned. I think it sounds like they auditioned. I'm like, I love how they auditioned. The river worked at Sir.

They auditioned the people who worked at Sir. And then they put the whole show. It was because Julie. This is Julie's thing. Is that the whole. And you would say, like, the whole entire show came because sheena fucking because the whole entire thing with obviously we all know it was sheena and brandy glanville at the thing where she's like you need to skin the well they held up that chart and he said when they get through the chart

showing how everyone was like fucking each other best friends rivals whatever and they saw that they were like okay we're gonna the idea for the spinoff came the moment. Yeah. Brandy Glanville sent her with like the pigs in a blanket, like get fucking tuna tartare fucking out of here. She fucked my ex. And then that was when all the producers

who do Beverly Hills. Because they were going to do Villa Blanca and they decided to come to search. Yeah. They were like, uh, let's do this.

Ah, she yelled at me. Yeah. I'm sorry, Lisa. But let me say one last thing about the classic. I mean, Julie just went over this too. She's being quiet because I'm just dominating Lisa. Let me say one last thing about the classic. I mean, Julie just went over this, too.

She's being quiet because I'm just dominating. She's still mad about my botched Admiral Picard joke. She wouldn't say Dana. She wouldn't say that. Oh, Dana. That's the other guy. Look, I said Dana. It just comes naturally to me.

It's authentic. I remember the guy with the banana curse, actually. What was Dana? He's like, 25,'s like 25,000. 25,000. What's his name on the show? Could you imagine? Dana Wilkie is going to jail for like a few years now, right?

Up to 20. Up to 20. Who's Dana Wilkie? 25,000. She was one of the one season wonders. Oh, wait a minute she's going to jail yeah

fraud I don't even know what her fraud was how Taylor Armstrong is still walking free I will never know wow Dana Wilkie

cause she got hit by you want to talk about a reality star that got hit by the bug and got off the rails she guessed she was a friend of season 2

was that season 2 season 2. Was that season two? Season two. It was her place for game night. I feel like it was season four. Yeah, it was her place for game night. We saw her season... Randy Landell came on in season two. Yeah, as a friend of.

Season three, Dana came on for one episode. She was drunk and strangely tanned and was talking to Taylor and crazy looking. I remember. And now all of a sudden she's doing fraud. I mean, look at a downward slope slope she's doing fraud somebody's got to do some kind of youtube thing of the but it's data but it's her data wilkie data wilkie yeah exactly there was even another scene with and lisa where k Kyle had her dumb, tragic, gold glasses on. God bless.

I hate Kyle. Like her 14-year-old. Oh, I remember his name. I remember his name. What is it? It's Jordy. Oh. That doesn't even sound familiar.

Like that French kid in that song. Wait, Dana's... Who's Jordy? Oh, the guy from Star Trek? Banana Clip is Jordy. Oh. Dana Wilkie.

Dana Wilkie is the guy with the eyes. The light eyes of the animals. And Lisa Vanderpump, it's obviously Lisa Vanderpump is Jean-Luc Picard.

They're British and they're in control. like, Real Housewives of Star Trek. I feel like Yolanda, Yolanda, okay, so Yolanda,

is Yolanda Worf, right? Is that her name, Worf? Worf? She is 100% fucking Worf. Yolanda is Worf with the hair?

Yeah, I think so. I just see it visually. You can imagine Worf walking and be like, I'm so sorry, She is 100% fucking wharf. Yolanda is war for the yeah You imagine war fuck it be like I'm so sorry I cannot help the ship today the lines I have to be I gotta go to my room, my love. I can't get out of bed, my love. But you've gotta go, yeah. Well, you know, there's like a... There actually, like, two weeks ago, there was a viral video. It was a four-minute-long video

of, like, a compilation of all the times that Worf has been told no. And there's, like, apparently, in Star Trek The Next Generation, it happens all the time where Worf is like, well, how about when we turn on the thrusters? He's like, Worf, you're being ridiculous. He's like, okay.

I feel... This is what I feel is happening over here in Julie's neck of the woods. I felt a mental note to look up Star Trek stuff on YouTube later. I really did. Because I don't think she realized there's all fun Star Trek videos for her. No.

To get into. And she was like thinking like, I'm going to go like look up all Star Trek. I'm going to get like good six hours of that. I'm going to get like a good six hours out of that. I feel like I'm detecting that I might be able to recruit Julie for game night, for board game night. I'm getting that sense.

What kind of dorky game night are we talking about? Oh, no. It's the darkest. It's the, what? He loves his games. Like Settlers Catan, that kind of stuff. He's got like stacks of games. I do, stacks.

He reviews them and stuff on his blog. Oh, new games. Games are still coming out in the world. Yeah, there's like a whole new world. And there's a Star Trek version of Catan.

Games are back. And it's not games on computers? No, it's like board games. And the board game industry has been growing in like double digits for the past four or five years.

Give us a new one besides Apples to Oranges or one of those. Well, Settlers of Catan, which Ron and I have played, is great. And there's a Star Trek version. Settlers of Catan? Sett and I have played, is great. And there's a Star Trek version. Settlers of Catan?

Settlers. Oh my god, oh my god, you guys, that sounds really corny. It is. Wait till you play, wait till you play.

It is so fun. My dream actually, I have this like, Is there a covered wagon involved? No, but you trade like, wheat fields.

Wheat and like, what? You trade like wheat and like stone. Listen, my dream is to actually play this with Lisa Rinna because I feel like

playing Settlers of Catan with Lisa Rinna would be like the funniest thing. She'll be like, okay, baby, I got some sheep and I need some stones, baby. Who's going to trade with me?

Okay? I got to look it up. Is Catan a real place or a... I own that sheep, baby. So it's like life but it's in Settlers. It's...

It's... Listen, we're going to... Okay, you know what? Here's listen we're gonna okay you know what here's what we're gonna do on another night we're gonna all get some cocktails I'll bust out

Salas Katan we're gonna play it and you'll see it'll change your life do you wanna do you wanna actually move close to the window because the breeze

has cooled the back of my neck and it feels so much better so it does of course you're gonna have to sit on my hot pillow now though because I've been eating

here I'll trade this pillow with that one. Oh, that's so sweet. We should talk about the, let's talk about, move it. I thought that went well, though. Did you guys? Let's do a check-in right now. Yeah, how do you guys feel? I think Julie has to talk more.

Yeah, Julie, come on. And also, I want to ask you about. Once we get into Real Housewives, I'll talk more. I know this is too personal, but I don't even care. Tell me about your hot husband, because you're not on Facebook. So after we went out the other night... Don't mess this up, goddammit. Maybe you just got a cool

pillow. This one's... Thank you. At least you have a cool back. Okay, we'll feel better now. Okay, so I was trying to find you on... The dog is now walking through the marshmallow man. He's just gonna make us hotter um

that's why I make him get down um his body heat's killing me okay so after we met the other night I went to try and find you on Facebook you're not on it you're not on Instagram either right or did I miss it only my dogs are on Instagram what the hell I know I can't do social media I do Twitter

but it I really social media brings out the worst in me it does yeah not only do um it doesn't make me terribly insecure to see that people like go on fun vacations and have families that care about them also i know that it's not even really true because i know that they just went on the same dumb, tragic fucking sandals vacation I went on, but they just took 900 selfies to make it look cool. Yeah. I know that it's not real, but I can't help it. And also I'll end up in someone I don't even know his whole life. And then that will ruin my day.

I don't even know this person. I just read it on the pot. I mean, I'm not really that into it either, but it's how I find people that I meet from parties, you know? Yeah, I think it's good and people can handle it for me. It's like toxic. Then I now realize a hundred years later after never doing Facebook that, um, I'm super, super private because I never thought about that before. Like, Oh, I don't do it cause I'm too private. But I just realized now that like sometimes we'll be having times and I'll be thinking like

I don't make private fucking business out there like I don't know it's like a weird yeah like I don't want I don't know so well I was googling you anyway you're trying to find where the hell you were so I could contact you um are you still married to that guy you are right yeah what the holy fridge how do you ever leave your house? That guy is gorgeous. I watched his entire six-minute reel. And my sister was like, please come. I want to see pictures. She's like, what is this? And I said, it's Brandi's husband's reel.

He's an actor. Oh, my God. Oh, he's hot. And I was like, yeah. She goes, let's watch something else. I was like, it's not over. I was mad. I watched the whole thing.

It's so cute. That's social media. cute that's my whole question that's why i'll never be an interviewer yeah you know just whenever you think like how does someone ever leave the house just tell yourself this no matter how hot the person is there's someone in the world that's tired of fucking them yes that's and that that sums up vanderpump rules yeah pretty much good that was a good so do we want to talk about here's um basically like list of scenes of the reunion so we i think the first thing we have to talk about the reunion we were talking about lala a moment ago we have to talk about that makeup we have to talk about lala's makeup what is happening there i I mean, poor Lala.

I think that she... It wasn't even drag queen makeup. That was like some airbrush that went wrong. Do you want to tell them that you thought it might be... I thought maybe she was doing like a super genius move where if she thought she looked like a Disney supervillain that it would like bring... It would make her the attention

in the room yes or like we've discussed before like that we have a theory about NeNe right

remember NeNe with her weird wig yes which yeah the one that was like Bride of Frankenstein yeah

there's that one for Washington there's even the new ones she's been wearing a weird long weave this season I mean she'll pull out

a look for the testimonial where you're like, what? Yeah. And we believe, there was even one where she looked like she had a five o'clock shadow.

Yeah, Nene seems to know she's a skee-ball machine. She's like, just let the balls go and let people aim. But Lala doesn't even act evil. Yeah.

But no, but then Brandi's like, she doesn't really have it like that or whatever. Because we believe that Nene wasn't, we believe she does need as those looks wholeheartedly, and by i mean me but julie agrees that nini does those looks because she knows i'm not i don't have a storyline but i'm gonna come correct in the in the

testimonial give you something to talk about bonnie rate style and the only thing you're gonna talk about is my george washington wig my five o'clock shadow makeup and we do yeah so Julie thought that maybe Lala was coming like that no but Lala's this is the thing she's not she doesn't

she can't harness her energies like that she just tried something went wrong it's like she put on her makeup like under a black no they have like

what? she was a makeup artist yeah it's something it looked like they had taken like a spray gun or something like that of makeup

it was all wrong I think she didn't she hadn't heard that they had cast Nina Simone yet. Yeah. Because that's always a bummer. I thought it was very...

She's like, they're going to get a complete model to play Nina Simone. I'm going for it! I thought it was very... It was very Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Did you guys love it?

Violet, you're turning violet, Violet! Did you guys love the episode when she went with the whole thing about eating the ass? Oh, you have to say it louder. Did you guys love the episode with the whole thing about her eating the ass? Thank you. I say it louder. Did you guys love the episode with the whole thing about her eating the ass?

Thank you. I want the gardener to know about we love eating ass in here. It was so, you don't, you don't remember? I remember the eating

the ass episode. Oh my God. Yes, where James was like, that is disgusting, babe. Oh yeah, of course. And she's like,

that is none of your business. She's like, that is none of your business to pay what I do on my own time. I love that she never That's when he said, you have a stupid thing to say. Because he said 58 and she's like that was the big thing she's like it's none of your business to pay what I do on my own time I love that she never that's when he said you're a stupid thing to say

because he said something and she goes that's a stupid thing to say you're a stupid thing to say oh yeah you're a stupid thing and she's like hey you know what we all get freaky

and by the way Julie and I she has showed us a picture of that guy's dick and balls which one James no

the black guy that she's fucking oh she. Which one? James? No, the black guy that she's fucking. Oh, she would not show us his face. She only showed us a package picture. Oh,

Ben, you guessed it. Ben was like, I'll bet that's a black guy because she said he's a football player. No, they said on the show

that he was, maybe they announced that he was black. Was it later? I just remember this from that episode. She said she liked She likes guys with big dicks.

And I think they said she liked black guys. We literally think they said she liked black guys. We literally did a toast to her liking black guys. But who doesn't? She puts her black guy penis into Julie's face. And Julie's like. Now you're audience. We're literally at pump in a bathroom stall.

And Julie's nearly balming. She would not show us his face. And after the eating ass episode, I was on a mission. Talk about Googling. I was in so fucking deep trying to find this guy. I just wanted to see his face. Because I want to know, is he fat or skinny? Because if he's a linebacker and you're eating his ass,

and if he's a quarterback and you're eating his ass, that's two very, two different things. Very different. Very, very different. I just need to know. There's a reason gay guys have so much sex in gym. That's two very, two different things. Yeah. Very different. Yeah. Very, very different. Yeah. I just need to know. Yeah. There's a reason gay guys have so much sex in gyms, because there's a shower, okay?

Right. I was proud of her. I was like, get down. Do your thing. Oh, yeah. Lala is too, she's got too much hope, right, I think, to be on a reality show, because she's too subtle. Like, she'll keep everybody's secrets.

Like, all this stuff she's talking, Andy keeps asking, he's trying to hint around at her whole past, you know. He's like, so, Italy, hmm, basically, from what I've read on the old internet in the comment sections, she was a yacht girl, which is, you know, where they fly these hot girls out. Like on Below Deck, when

the millionaire shows up and he's got, like, six girls in his bag. Yeah, she's one of those girls, like, on the yacht, but supposedly they get peed on or something. There's, six girls in his bag. Yeah, she's one of those girls like on the yacht but supposedly they get peed on or something. There's like some weird thing. They go to the Middle East and they like, it's not even about

having sex with them. It's mostly degrading them in weird ways like peeing on them and stuff. And then, you know, they get to go on a boat and maybe go to a buffet or something.

But they do definitely, I think, have. Well, she said it. She's like, I'm the only one, like I was the only one not having sex with people on that trip. I'm like, really? In a group of ten, I was the only one not having sex with people on that trip.

I'm like, really? In a group of 10 hoes? Get out of here, Lala. Come on now. Yeah. Well, but she seems pretty upfront about it. But I think, though, that she would say if she was having sex. I think she would be like, yeah, I boned him.

I liked it. So what? What are you going to do? I like him. You know? I think that, you know, Lala. Go on, Harry. From Wondery, this is Black History For Real.

I'm Francesca Ramsey. And I'm Conscious Lee. What do most people think about when they hear the words Black History? Rosa Parks, Reconstruction, MLK, February, Black History Month. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories of Black History that we just are not really talking about or thinking about, especially outside of February. And we are about to flip the script on all of that.

Because on this show, you're going to hear a little less. In August 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue. And a little bit more. She is a heroine to some as a fighter for black rights. She is a villain to others. Follow Black History for Real on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere on February 5th, or you can listen early and ad-free on Wondery Plus starting January 29th. Join Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.

Black is beautiful. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, played by HBO's Industries' Myhala Herald, a brilliant scholarship student who has to quickly adapt to her newfound eat or be eaten world. Ava's ambitions take hold and her small town values break in hopes of becoming the first scholarship student to make The List, Bishop Gray's all-coveted academic top 10, curated by the headmaster himself. But after realizing she has no chance at The List on her own, she reluctantly accepts an invitation to a secret underground society that pulls the strings on

campus life and academic success. If she bends to their will, she'll have everything she's ever dreamed of. But at what cost? Academy takes you into the world of a cutthroat private school where power, money, and sex collide in a game of life and death. Follow Academy on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Academy early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus. I don't know. I don't know if she would admit

the fate to going out about this for a year. I mean, it's cool if I can't. When she said who's been doing, when they asked her, like, who's done Girl on Girl, and everyone had said that they'd done Girl on Girl

except for her. She's like, no, I actually haven't. I think if she were a liar, I think she would have just chimed in to try to sound cool. I think she was like, I think she's pretty upfront about her sexuality. I think she's an innocent girl for a hoe.

Like, she has lines. Like, she'll get peed on or make out with a girl at a party. But, you know, like when it comes to down there sexy, no, that's for love, guys. Love eating is different. Right. Okay, so here's my notes. They're really confusing. Tom's makeup.

Okay, everyone's talking about Lala's makeup. What about Tom's makeup? He's orange. That's makeup. Okay, everyone's talking about Lala's makeup. What about Tom's makeup? He's orange. That's all I had to say. No one else cares. You want to move on? Yeah, we talked about all this, right?

I mean, so for me, the only other things were lesbian tattoos. I actually did not think it was a great reunion episode. I thought it was sort of like retreads of all the same stuff of like,

was Kristen having sex? Was Tom having sex? It was all kind of the same stuff of like was Kristen having sex was Tom having sex it was all kind of the same stuff my favorite thing were she knows reactions and Katie's reactions because everything she had this like look on her face like her eyes with bold and she would screw up her mouth and then she like smiled the next job be her smiling and she'd be angry again. And then Katie, Katie had this one. Oh, Krista. Katie had this one shot that I put up. I actually recorded it and put it on my Instagram.

My Instagram is b-side blog if anyone wants to know. But because she had this moment where they just cut to her. And she was like laughing along nervously as if she had no idea what the joke was. But she wanted to be part of it. She was like. I was like, oh oh classic katie classic like wannabe yeah that was a pretty fun reunion but that was a typical part one-er because next week stassi comes and yells at people and who else comes next week yeah yeah i mean i really don't

i watched it just last night i just can't remember anyone's worth it just to see sheena being like i didn't know what an alcoholic was. And I also love when Tom gets really mad and starts yelling at Kristen. I think that is so funny. He's like, Kristen! Or when James said, Kristen, she would wait, who said this? Tom or James? They said she would leave for an hour and she'd get mad, go up to the Hollywood Hill,

get some ass, and then come back an hour later and her face would smell like butt. He has a real issue with that. You know, James is like James is like the master. James has a butt eating thing. He is the master of the comeback. You are! Yeah, that's basically what it is.

You're just like an insecure, stupid, little British guy. No, you are, Kristen. You're an insecure, stupid, little British guy. I'm not even British. You are! Great one, James. You're an intercaste in a British camp. I'm not even British. You are. Great one, James. You really killed it. Okay. Well, let's move on

to Beverly Hills. Do you guys have to pee? No, I do not. Do you? Do you guys? I don't need to take a pee break. This is usually pee time. We're going to forgo the pees.

Should we take a pee and refill this? I'm getting drunk. I wasn't even going to drink. Yeah, let's stop just so we can take a moment. and refill this. I'm getting drunk.

I wasn't even going to drink. Yeah, let's stop just so we can take a moment. Okay, so let's move on to this week's episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, which was very... There was a lot of stuff to talk about with it.

So the episode began. It opened up with Yolanda getting her makeup done for lines for 11 months as if it's like some accomplishments you know everything she does she feels is an accomplishment every single thing like him everything you know I haven't been outside for so long I love but yeah I'm gonna walk two steps my love everyone look at my Instagram I walk two steps look at me I'm walking oh my eyes are open everyone my love my eyes are open I love her selective it's been so long since I've been able to use tissues. Oh, but now I can.

So, look, cry for me. Cry for me. But she's so full of shit. She's been wearing... We see you wearing makeup. Like, do you think that because your eyeshadow is brown and you're wearing, like, community theater pancake base, that that's not makeup?

I know. She thinks it's a fresh face. Well, you're also putting bleach in your hair. Your hair is bleached, okay? Those roots are, like, they're bleached, okay? And guess what bleach is it's chemicals it's not like from a pine cone well i paused it right when she said that it was like i started like vomiting out words and then i pressed play and she's like oh or even botox or fillers for years for three years like you have a filler line on your cheek well there's like a straight line going up and down from like the dent of the filler.

And then she goes like this to get more makeup on and her forehead doesn't move. I bet you don't even think you're a kid. She's also like, it's amazing, you know, now that I have stopped with the Botox and the fillers, it's amazing what happens to the face. I'm like, yeah, it's called being a human being. That's what happens to our faces. I've noticed one different thing with her face. Yeah.

First of all, also, she's, like, beautiful. So, like, she probably doesn't have to do anything because she's naturally stunning, you know? White jeans. Oh, let me do

white jeans. She just has a very selective journey. It's like, I can't go to Pasadena. I'm so tired. But, oh, I'm going to go up to Toronto

to go on a boat. Like, it's weird when she gets tired and what she can do. But no one wants to go to Pasadena. That is true. I know.

So far, you guys. No one should also even go to Toronto. Yeah. Although, I am going in two weeks. Although, they both do have a cheesecake factory.

Let's give credit where credit is due, okay? To be fair, I feel like I was just in Pasadena and I am going to Toronto in two or three weeks, so. Pasadena is so beautiful,

but god damn it's far. It's so far. I can't believe they cast someone in Pasadena. That shit doesn't even count. Malibu, this cast has Malibu and Pasadena.

Catherine lives in San Diego. I'm like, housewives of Beverly Hills, lady, live in San Diego. Get the fuck out of my face. She has like a pied-a-terre on like Palm Drive

or something like that. She barely qualifies. Pasadena is my high school. That's where I go and pretend I drive on the rich streets of the old, old, old, because it's like Northeast, like money there.

And I'm like, this is how my high school would have been. I would have been a convertible white Mercedes. And I would have been, and my parents have been rich. My dad is like an orthodontist. And my mom also is an important something in dentistry or something and i would be here and i'd be rich maybe i'm asian i'm not even i'm an asian there

rich asians yeah it's my dream high school scene that's totally nice in pasadena they own that town pasadena is so far and yet but whenever time i do go i'm like oh my god i love it here it's so pretty and so nice and there's like there's a Lee's sandwiches there which has the best

Vietnamese iced coffee I just go to that one strip where there's all the cheesecake yeah old town and stores

and a Barnes and Noble and stuff and huge trees that have been around since the 1800s and Tom and Erica's house does look very Pasadena it It's like a million

different patterns from the 70s. Is his name Tom? Yeah, I call him Don Rickles. Yeah, it's Tom Girardi. So she's getting ready. Oh, because I'm so loud. I figure the poor people in the cars are, oh, I was going to let her sit by the side. No, I'll go over there.

We're going to do musical chairs here. No, we're trying to be too far away. I know, but it's like summer in here. I'm so loud. My fucking neighbors know everything I'm saying. Ugh. So anyway, so Yolanda's getting makeup on. For the Academy Awards.

She's even making makeup into, like, a pivotal. A feat. Yeah, a feat in her journey back from the. Oh, I haven't felt my feet in 17 years. And poor David. Oh, no. David, I'm so sorry. Oh, I've been such a horrible wife because I've been sick and

I've been able to suck your dick every day, David. I'm sorry, David. I hate David. Oh, David. He's been so wonderful to me while I've been on down. It's been horrible for him. It's been so wonderful to me. Well, I've been on down and I spin horrible friends. There's a horrible for him Really well, we only heard that from someone else who saw gay stuff happening

Choir boys who come and they're like like you'll go from the basement. Yeah, I love choir boys who come and they're like like il divo from the basement yeah he locks them in the basement and then they bring them up after dinner that's so rude so we can't say for sure but someone did say that they saw david on the dl oh i like it that's part of that's a frightening thought though that waddle coming at you could you imagine that thing being above you just him yeah david's face coming down well maybe that would explain why she's depressed i mean we all she's into it i mean like you're like we i mean she's obviously sick but like i think a lot of people believe that it's probably more related to depression than lyme disease be of course that none of us are doctors right if you were if you were gay if you were gay that would certainly be

the sort of thing that i think would probably send a wife into some sort of, like, illness-creating depression. Well, she had something before with Mohammed due to an illness. Yeah, he said. Yeah, no, no. That's public. Oh, it is? Yeah, he said that she was sick the whole time they were together. And then on Dr. Oz.

I thought only we knew this. And then on Dr. Oz, she said, because Dr. Oz said, here's a stack of your medical records, which the thing Planet Fitness or whatever in Chinatown. God knows where these were from. They weren't doctors. But it was like a stack this big. And he was going through a history. And he said, you were hospitalized when you were 7, 11. It was like every four years. And it was all exhaustion related things. And then she said, well, It was like every four years. And it was all exhaustion-related things.

And then she said, well, my mother was always in bed. She was in bed five days a week with the windows closed. So it's a... Something very fishy about that. Guys. It's a depression attention thing.

I'm obsessed. And the fact... She's probably so mad at Lisa Rinna for... She keeps on saying that Lisa Rinna accused her of having Munchausen, which is not what happened. Maybe she did. No, but it's not really what happened. Then she brought it up winner accused her of a munchausen which is not what happened but no but it's not but it's not really what

happened then she brought it up and said you have much I'll say it on TV 20 times yeah but it was it was Yolanda who got separated that whole situation Her ESL situation, all of a sudden she doesn't speak English at all. The fact that she acts like, the fact that she pretends like it's some crazy thing, Munchaus, and she gets so mad at Lisa Rinna or whatever, it kind of acts like thou doth protest too much or whatever, you know? And then she purposely read the wrong definition. When she came at Lisa, yeah, she did the by proxy. She's so shady. And that made everyone so uncomfortable. wrong definition when she came at least yeah she did the by proxy but then this you're gonna get

to it but then the same with brandy there was another english issue what does this mean i'm like what the fuck all of a sudden you juggler english last year what is this a wig yeah what does this mean oh god she i can't believe she's like it's like you know when people when you know it's like it's like that when people talk about People who are not like original English speakers going on jury duty how they can you leave don't understand any English So meanwhile speak capacity no over in Pasadena Erica is also getting she's getting ready for Dubai And she has her she has her, she has her, like, her hangers on. Can you guys do a job

as her dresser slash packer slash bring in her tea? I mean, how many gay guys are you chucking me in? These are like the most fawning gay guys. We've seen a lot of glam squads on Bravo. Well, I just want to say, and maybe this is too soon into the episode. Please, no, never too soon. Well, I just want to say, and maybe this is too soon into the episode.

Please, no, it's never too soon. So she says in that thing, she's like, I'm bringing my glam squad with me. Do that, because I can. And I'm like, okay, fine. And no one ever admits that, too. And they all hide in the corners in the crowd. And I don't even have, that's cool.

Do you have a lookbook for your vacation? Like, okay. A lookbook with Lisa Vanderpump but no one is going to a lookbook but Lisa Vanderpump by the way looks gorgeous and whatever and her muumuu conversion

totally outclasses everyone but anyway sorry but not one of those gay and not one of the women and not one of those gay guys wants to bring up the fact that they're going to a place where every one of those

fucking guys will get killed yes yeah they'll get stoned not just they could get full on murdered and it would be fine yeah

it was against the law to be gay I mean those eyebrows I can't believe the customs doesn't stop them for their eyebrows this is just a window

into me and Julie she wouldn't she was in a mood so she wouldn't watch it the night it was on because I said oh girl

it's the Dubai and she goes oh I fucking will not tonight I can't I'm pissed night it was on. Because I said, oh, girl, it's Dubai. And she goes, oh, I fucking will not tonight. I can't. I'm pissed, too. I'm pissed, too. Someone wrote that on our Facebook page, too.

I'm watching, and I'm like, Lisa, and this whole thing, and Lisa looks so pretty, and Lisa's hair is up. I'm shallow, Sally. I'm like, Lisa's hair. And Julie's like this. Fucking Wikipedia entries are coming in about Dubai. All she's sending me is shit about Dubai. I read it in her USMWiki page. Dubai is totally shady.

My friend lives in Dubai and she says that if you're a foreigner, if you're driving, you are stopped at an intersection and a native Dubaiian. Which aren't that many people, by the way. It's one family. The entire country is run by immigrant workers like a cruise ship. If you're a resident and you're drunk driving and you crash and they crash into your car and you're just sitting there, you're totally like... Yeah, it's your fault.

No, in America, it's your fault because you shouldn't have been there in the first place. That's what they say. Oh, God. I was looking up women rights because I was like, I know that Bravo... There are no women rights there. I know that the whole point of Bravo is like women demeaning other women. But didn't New York go there?

So I guess it would kind of make sense. Did New York go there or did New York go to Africa? No, they went to Morocco. Remember, this is not the Plaza Hotel. This is Morocco. I don't think it's all the same. I'm like, burkas and fucking...

Many shows have gone to Dubai. People love to glamorize Dubai. I'm not going to fucking have it. Well, also, Dubai's tackiest shit, by the way. It's like Vegas times 100. It's gorgeous. Before we get into Dubai, there's still some stuff before.

That was just a window into Julie. He was talking about Lisa's hair up and Julie being like, this is what they do to women. This is what they do to gay people. Everyone should be ashamed. And I was shocked that they don't even respect Jean-Luc Picard. I was shocked that they don't outlaw fillers and Botox and shit because they're under Sharia law. And so I thought, how can they have fillers?

And I thought, you can't stone a bitch with a rubber face. By the way, that rock will come back and hit you right in the face. I don't know if you know this, but the new cast member of Beverly Hills is named Sharia Law. I don't know if you know this. No way. Shut up. I wouldn't believe that. She has a fabulous car that runs her over while she's trying to get out of it.

I'm not strict, but I do make the rules. Sharia law. If you hate me, it's my fault. Sharia law. We have a fake Real Housewives woman named Gondola Price.

We're talking about some episode where they got into a gondola and were like, Gondola sounds like one of the Real Housewives. We go up with the name Gondola price we named it because we're talking about some episode where they got into a gondola i'm like gondola sounds like one of the real housewives i hope with the name gondola price that's a good one so we'll we'll we'll plug her in every now and then this is my alter ego so so erica is getting she's getting ready and her gays are fawning over my favorite part though is they're like goodbye we're going to buy and they're like oh but we're not flying with it they're gonna be like on Ryanair with 10 layovers oh yeah staying at the hostel under the burger check listen if you all get murdered you're on minimum wage okay punch out before you get killed

you're not gonna get on my plane that's where the bomb will happen is where all the makeup artists yeah and the hair like good luck on getting through and could there ever be further evidence of someone who has more time on their hands than a housewife in Pasadena who has three days to come over to go over their lookbook

for the vacation I mean that's just like you know listen if you got all the money and you could do with it like sure that's great but I mean that's like

there's amazing everything she's gotta learn from Celeste Kattan come on you guys I don't give a fuck that's what we always say

I don't give a fuck everything's like I don't give a fuck I got a lookbook I don't give a fuck I'm gonna bring my my gays I don't give a fuck

and then she's like wants a diamond and she's like um now that I know his name's Tom you know what but she calls him

the boss or whatever whatever she calls him she's like I just text it to his assistant and then I say maybe he could get me this I'm like

she has access to none of the money. Yeah. She can hire staff, which will go somehow into a payroll, but to be like, I'm simply going to buy myself this diamond with all of his millions. Yeah. Her first note is that she was walking around with Minnie Ho, you know, like her intern Ho. And she's like, okay, we need money for pool tiles.

We need money to fix tiles, and we need money to fix the grass, and we need money for a new light bulb. And she's like riding it all down. She's probably like bored and miserable up in that castle every day and passing it. Like she goes out and she does Erika Jayne and she's like dancing and around and doing stuff like that. But when she's

not doing that, she's probably just like sitting in there with like, you hear the grandfather clock ticking and she's like okay I'm out she's waiting for old Tom to kick the bucket to collect that money so then she starts

doing like a photo shoot with her days and she's like on a table and Kyle walks in and Ronnie you wrote down that Kyle comes in with a Wednesday Addams outfit

yeah the internet was calling her Wednesday Addams she was dressed like a pilgrim like there's Erica like her ass in the air Erica on the coffee table

on all fours. Yeah. Can I just get a shot of you so that I can say I did your makeup for this event? And then all of a sudden she's in some full hustler pose with someone eating her out from behind. Totally. I'm like, how did you get from a simple

snapshot of your makeup to your modeling shoot on the top of the table? Her pre-Lyme Gala. That's what I love. She's like, I'm going to the Lyme Gala. Let's get some instances of me on the Lyme Academy Awards. She's like, let's get some shots of me in doggy style right before this serious disease. Well, you know, we talked about this before in previous episodes with Erica.

What's so strange to us about Erica also is that she is totally with the gays. She loves the gays. The gays love her and everything. And we like Erica a lot. We do, even if we give her shit. And she plays gay clubs. And yet, considering how much time she spends with the gays and that she's always around gay guys, she never seems to be one of these gals that's just gabbing with the gays.

Doesn't she still seem like really like tight? I think, I feel, Ben called it once. I think that the gays are making fun of her. I don't think that they're, yeah, because look what they're putting her in. They can't think that's good. Right. I don't sense like a real friendship. No, like a real intimacy.

They're like on the payroll. I think they just, I think they're having fun. They played like dress up with her. Yeah. But she always, I don't know. We both didn't, though. Yeah, I don't know. It's don't know it's a weird it's a weird dynamic to me she doesn't seem like the worst like lisa vanderpump you feel like she sort

of like like has fun with her gay friends and like she doesn't seem like even when her with any of her employees even that goddamn housekeeper who's like a celebrity to us i feel like but like i feel like with any of our employees, she actually seems like she has a real relationship with them.

I get that vibe. And I do feel like those guys are using Erica to get, they're like, girl, let me just

get my 500 and go put this bitch in some continent glitz. That's the thing I'm getting. Exactly. It's like when

the legal, like she was on Shots of Sunset and she had her glam squad come in. Like, you know, I just always,

I'm always suspicious of like a quote unquote glam squad. To me you know i just always um i'm always suspicious of like a quote-unquote glam squad to me it's like they're on the payroll and all and all if if the entire conversation is them telling you how hot you look and how great you look i'm just like this is not like a real i don't want to say a real friendship but this is not a real conversation right what what is the conversation you look great you look so oh no that looks great no that looks great i I'm like... I haven't seen one genuine friend of Erica's yet. No? We haven't seen one. I haven't seen a Catherine who

no one can trust her and fuck her, but she's like... She has these walls up, and I mean, like, I definitely think she's guarded, and I'm not even sensing... She probably just doesn't put them on camera. Catherine, who's obviously tools, but did say this about Erica, that she puts these walls up.

I did think she did kind of seem... I thought she seemed so sweet and so supportive with Yolanda when Yolanda got all of her silicone removed from her whole body. Yeah, Erica, yes. Come on, the bitch got her in the house. I think Erica's a good friend to Yolanda, for sure. Yeah, I've sensed some... I think that's shown her kind side.

But other than that, like... There's like a world that she's not putting on camera that's what I get the sense of I don't feel like maybe she tells those

gay guys like you know what let's just do this acting scene that's probably true too like that's why I didn't want to say it's not a real friendship

but it just didn't seem like it was a real interaction I don't think it's real because none of the other women even know who this woman is they've all been shooting with her

for years they've never heard of this best friend I don't believe that that they're even friends. I think it's for the show. She probably knew her. Oh, no, Lisa did tell us

that it wasn't real. But I mean... Well, that's why she was hinting. She's like, how long have you known her? Yeah. I didn't like that you were

trying to come between my relationship. You were questioning it. She's like, no, I wasn't. Yes, you were. And yeah, and she kept saying,

why are you asking? It's like, because I was wondering. Yeah. They get stuck on weird shit. But do you think that she... Question, Lisa! That's like us going like this.

Okay, you guys, the cameras are coming in. Don't say how we all just did 500 things of Crystal Meth. Let's just talk about my lookbook. Yeah. Cool. And then it's all about... But is there a real relationship behind the... What do you guys think,

behind the camera? Behind the, with anybody? No, I mean with the gang. With, with, with Erica and her group.

You don't think she has friends with any of those guys? Erica's choreographer is a famous choreographer. He's very successful. Tom pays for her whole career. She just started it a few years ago.

She'd been married for years and got bored and so he bought her a career. So he got her the best choreographers, the, all her dancers when she was at that party at her house and kyle was like you're a katy perry dancer too like she looks at the resumes of the guys these are not just random gays these are like worked out like complete perfectly bodied gays for pay that are famous and so she gets katy perry's dancers like that doesn't make you katie

perry lady yeah i think that i i feel like i feel like that's a real friendship i don't know how like close they are how how could i know but i do i feel like the interactions on camera are just like i feel like they're not real and i actually think it like makes gay guys look bad it just makes it looks like gay guys just like, Oh, the party. Which one? The Target party? The party when the pool party, right? Yes.

The gay guys were like zoo animals, right? Just playing it. They were the only ones there. There was nobody even there. It was very obviously like, Hey, we need 10 gay guys to go in the pool. And the women were laughing. And Q laughing.

Like they were laughing for the camera and stuff pool. And the women were having... And Q laughing. Like, they were laughing for the camera and stuff. And then the women were having, like, sort of like, well, I wouldn't say it was a dull conversation because it was still

pretty immature, but they were, like, talking like normal people and then they cut to the gays and the gays were like, ha ha ha ha ha ha. Exactly. It was like,

oh, this is what gays are. They're throwing a beach, one of those big beach ball things to each other. Like, ha ha ha ha. It was like, but literally, where are the

motherfuckers' friends? Yeah. Like, where's her random... I don't think she has them her random i mean even if your friend's just your weird neighbor i think she's just kind of an ice queen she's like sold out her her personality to get married to some old rich dude now she's you know happy so sad wow well then she comes in the housewives and she's hip and cool because she'll say cunt and because she hangs out with gay guys and none of them do that. And to a novice Housewives person, she's like, they love her. Yeah, they love her.

I guarantee season two it'll change because they're going to want to dig deeper. And right now, it's just like, it's like every two years, everyone's got to take a good go at Lisa Vanderpump. And then, like, so it's like, this is Lisa Vanderpump attack season, and then what's going to happen is all the fans love Lisa, and everyone says, why are you going after Lisa? And then everyone, course corrects, like, wait a second, the fans don't like what we're doing this. So now they're going to go after Erica, they're like, she doesn't,

like, what's going on in her life? Like, whatever, she's like, they're going to come up with whatever. It's true. Kyle Richards will lead a charge. Right. So anyway, so over in New York, so now we have, as you call it, Ronnie,

the Lime Academy Awards, which is this gigantic gala. I was actually shocked at how big it was. All rich people. All rich people. Well, you know,

you have Tommy Hilfiger. It's very fat. It's very in now. Yeah. If you have lots of acreage with lots of deers on it. Well, no, here's the thing.

I mean, if you're in the Northeast, you can get, if you're in the Northeast, you can get it just like walking in a park. But the thing that bothers... Lyme disease is a serious disease, and it really is bad.

It does terrible things to you, and it's a horrific thing, and I think it's great to raise money for it. But sometimes the way they... Like at this gala, the way they carry it on, it's just like... It's so hard.

This is like such a weird... This is like such a weird... Oh, I'm so sorry. I did it to me. We had a spill. This is... That was just water, or was that... No, nothing even came out of it. It was like Skinny Girl smelling...

We should take this off here, though. Put some in my cup first. Yes, thank you. We have all these electronics. We have a bottle of Skinny Girl. I'm not going to have any. Okay, wait. So, yeah, lime is real, but chronic lime is different.

Because Yolanda's not saying she has lime. She didn't go test and get a blood test for lime. She's saying chronic lime. That's like a million different diseases that they can't explain. This is what I've been wondering! Yes! I told you. I'm on my way, though. I've got to know. explain. This is what I've been wondering! Yes! I told you. I'm on my way, though. I gotta know.

Yes, that's what I've been wondering. There's like a post-treatment sort of condition that you can get. Yeah, there's no test like a blood test. Do the kids have chronic Lyme, too? No. Do they have that break-lure Lyme? She said it. She said it on there at the gala.

She said, my kids have chronic Lyme. Oh, that's what I told you, and there's no test! Yes! I said, I told you and there's no test! Yes! I think here's what's hard here's what's hard for me and this is where I feel like I really understand Lisa Rinna on this which is that like like how can any human being look at a gal

of people who've got Lyme disease who have been affected physically by this disease and be like oh they're making too much of a big deal about it because it's a disease it's a real disease so you feel shitty for saying they're making too much of a big deal about it but then there's part of me that's like you know when people are like dying of cancer you know like dying of it not to say i'm not trying to make light of lyme disease yeah no but like but when it's like, like, oh no, and now like Allie Hilfiger has Lyme disease

too. It's like, well, guess what? Like tons of people get Lyme disease and it's a terrible thing, but it's also like people get treated or whatever. You're scared. You're scared. I will literally tell Julie, I have known people with straight up full blown AIDS, not even HIV, full blown AIDS who have pulled it together and complained less than this motherfucker.

Like, I swear to you. Yeah, I just... Like, the level of her, like, this debilitating of this disease, it's exhausting. Yeah, it's just, I think it's the whole... No, I think it's the whole... Big Ang probably didn't even mention it

in the fight one day later. People said no to him because he was dead. But I think it's just the way, it's the way the conversation is being had and so the thing is like if yolanda were here this you'd be like how could they question my journey how can they question my journey it's not about questioning the journey but it's the way it's the journey god damn it this does not sound like summer camp yeah it would it would it be great if there's a cure absolutely is it great that people are raising money for it

absolutely but the way they talk about it is like my life was perfectly normal and then I found out that I had like a genetic mutation now I have full blown lines it's like that's not the same it's like you were bitten by a tick and then didn't everyone at the thing seem to be saying no

the prevalent thing like the through line of the whole event was like no one believes you have this. Our struggle is really that no one believes us. And Ronnie, you just fucking changed my life. I was literally laying in a tanning bed on my things to Julie going,

I don't understand. Can you take a simple test? Take a simple test. It's a huge controversy because last year, there's like a this Global Lime Alliance is a lobbying organization and they're lobbying to get chronic lime and it happened last year some states recognize it as an actual disease because the cdc didn't for a long time because it's all these different diseases and the trouble is is that now the doctor if you have chronic fatigue

or any of these other diseases hard to diagnose they say okay this is chronic Lyme or whatever and then they could do whatever they want because they're not regulated the same way that is normal doctor is so all these doctors are fucking people over I mean your longest treatments are insane but what she's doing is nuts so if that is now legal then they can start charging insurance it's a huge fucking racket yeah that's what I thought I said the bitch is gluten intolerant with regular Lyme disease. Yeah.

She has regular Lyme disease that the guy from Hall & Oates has, which sucks and is a nightmare. Yeah, absolutely. But then she's eating gluten and now her whole shit is like down the other deathbed. Plus she had her silicones

explode up into her chest cavity. That is just like, yeah. And that was good. She got that removed. That was real. That was real. That was really changing. Yeah, it's weird.

And that's the thing because no one's questioning the illness. No one's questioning that illness no one's no one's questioning that she is ill no one is questioning people who have lyme disease and being like you're faking it like suck it up it's just it's just the the this the the like the way it's being discussed at this gala was so over the top i thought but there are parts of it that are not real there are parts of it that aren't real there are parts of it that are not real. There are parts of it that aren't real. There are parts that we do it.

I think she's full of shit. So it's like she's definitely trying to do weird things with attention and depression. It's not to say that there are physical things that are happening, and Lyme disease is a separate thing. So maybe she has Lyme disease. But she also has fucking attention disease. Yeah, we go through it twice. DM Brown died like

big and yes literally cancer two days it was like you're alive she's on a show like just like big and you're not tweeting shit with an ivy my love i can't my eyes it's like there's one thing happening you're sick and that sucks and it's terrible and right but then there's another thing well you're just fucking annoying and like literally dm is on a tv show where she's doing challenges and then literally like within a week she's dead yeah and it's like so honestly i mean this is me i'm the worst i lack empathy and someone should stone me in a fucking street but like suck it fucking up i don't want to hear it throw on some makeup and let's do this thing hell yeah complain about it tomorrow yeah exactly or complain about it to your family like why is it don't chronically lie on tv i mean how many lies have you told in this one episode

you're she's obviously lying chronically everything that comes out of her mouth it's a lie yes it's a lie she lies a million times on this one show to me what was the most amusing part and i see you sort of wrote it down in your notes here, Ronnie, was, so Kyle was there and Catherine, and Kyle's there and she's like, whoa, this is so big, and whoa, there's Tommy Hilfiger, and wow, this is like fancy, and it's like all of a sudden you see all these power brokers, see all this money, you see celebrity and everything,

and suddenly Kyle's like, oh, wow, I really do understand Yolanda now, and now she's like, and you know, it makes me mad that Lisa and Lisa were so insensitive. It makes me mad. I'm like, oh, I see. You see where the celebrities are? Blood clockers. And suddenly you're like on Yolanda's side.

And second Gigi shed that tear. Kyle's pussy got wet. Kyle's like, both of the other ones are on the red carpet right now. They're celebrities. It's real. It's like my both of the other ones are on the red carpet right now. They're celebrities. It's real. It's like my new Paris Hilton. Like, Kyle is feeling it, sweating it so hard. And Kyle's the one who started all this shit in the first place.

Kyle is the worst. She starts every little thing. So now she's starting to turn against Lisa Rinna. She's like, I just wish I had been more defensive. She must turn against Vanderpump. I mean, even though we're just at this one scene, I had my full remorse, which

happens to me when next week's episode makes me want to die. I'm like, the preview for next week? This is all a prelude? We've been wondering for weeks, when is the... When does it all fall apart?

Because we know, just from our word on the street, that by the reunion, no one's friends with Vanderpump except Catherine. Wow. So we're just wondering, you keep seeing little teases, like, is it going to fall apart next? I guess it's next week.

Well, this is what happens every three years. Every two or three seasons, everyone goes after... Why would Yolanda go against Vanderpump? That was the only thing that made her even acceptable at all this season. She did it with Yolanda the first time. What, was it season two or three? Well, you know why? You know why?

Because Lisa Rinna says the most manipulative person is Yolanda. And so, if they're all against Lisa Vanderpump at the end of this, well then, who do you think orchestrated that?

You cannot fuck with Who has been pushing the narrative that Lisa's been coming for my family, Lisa's been doing this and that. You know,

it's... And I lean too. It doesn't seem common sense, you guys. Even if you're in the middle of it and you're like, ugh, my husband,

where's Maurizio? Where's Portia, my kid? even if you're in the middle of it and you're like, oh, my husband, where's Maurizio? Where's Portia, my kid? Even if you're in the middle of it, doesn't it seem common sense? I'm never going to come for Lisa. I'm going to stay with Lisa as my ally. Like, it's Israel and Palestine, so I'm serious. They have egos, you know, because they all have egos. You know, they are reality stars. They're egos.

And if they start to get the feeling that they're being manipulated for someone else's gain on tv to improve their fame whatever it pisses them off so no matter how much they look at something pragmatically and they think okay lisa's the star the fans love lisa she has yet to be dethroned i should not abandon her they can't help it because they get so mad to think that their star might be shrinking to help and kyle's not we heard is this true you guys that kyle's done oh i will never be done didn't we hear that i don't believe it where did we hear that we heard that she we heard on that from lisa vanderpump that she that fucking you know kathy hilton got her to not do no kyle said that okay so you remember when the when she wasn't invited to the wedding. Yes, of course.

And then she got invited with a couple of the kids, but some of the kids and Maurizio didn't get to go. So right after that, Rick, Kathy's husband, was on TMZ. And they're like, hey, what do you think about this Real Housewives Kyle stuff? And he's like, well, Kyle apologized and she's told us that she's decided to quit the show. So we're okay with her now. Kyle's such a liar. I'm sure Kyle decided to quit the show, so we're okay with her now. Oh, so Rick... Kyle's such a liar. I'm sure Kyle decided to quit so she can go to that fucking Hilton wedding. Because Rick hates Maurizio.

Yeah. Yeah, so maybe... Maurizio went and stole all his clients. That's right. Yeah, Maurizio. Kyle's a sneaky bitch. She is. I'm with you.

She will always be somewhere she can get more business for her husband or a free fat burger. She said, goodbye, Maurizio. Take the clients, but I'll be at the Hilton wedding in England, bitch. She left Maurizio, but she took his business cards. She did? I'm sure. You know she did, and she took the kids. She's like, Portia, sit at home. Kids aren't allowed.

She was over there stealing more of Rick's clients. Kyle's an asshole, but she's a smart asshole. Yeah, she's crafty. So then, meanwhile, over in Los Angeles, in Beverly Hills, Lisa Vanderpump did a classic Real Housewives thing, which is that she rewarded a child with a major vehicle for doing the most basic level thing.

It's like, oh, like, hey, you handed in all your homework on time. You get a Maserati. Well, in this case, it was like, oh, well, you know, Max has been so wonderful he's he hasn't gotten fired in nine months so I got him a Jeep

Max hasn't had a drug overdose in six months I bought him a car but it's not a Maserati it's like a Jeep Wrangler yeah a Jeep Wrangler Maxfield Todd

his girlfriend is like 47 really oh I thought he was oh really I thought he was

with Faith I like Max that's right we love Max maybe because he was Oh, really? I thought he was with Faith. I like Max. That's right. We love Max. Maybe because he doesn't ever talk. We love Max Phil Todd. He's not thirsty

for the show. He doesn't give a shit. He has an I love anyone that loves an old lady. I'm like, you know what? Good.

He's young. He's young. He's 24. I love him. Yeah, he's so sweet. And when we were there, he was running back and forth actually carrying food

and sweating. And people would say, can we take your picture? And he's like, busy. And he just kept running back and forth. And they'll be like, he was running back and forth, actually carrying food and sweating. And people would say, can we take your picture? And he's like, busy. And he just kept running back and forth. And they'll be like, he's at work, sir. And I'm like, why does he work? You're rich.

No, no, no. He's going to work. I think it's cute. I mean, I love him. He's sweet. He's not annoying. No, I agree. Hopefully he'll take over the biz.

I think the whole family seems well adjusted and doing well. He was, I guess, what? He had a problem for that second where he didn't have his... Whatever. He was living off it. He didn't make his way all the way through. He didn't make his all the way through. It's all in the past.

Because he's adopted. He's not like Pandora. No, no. Pandora turned out so well and Max is a challenge. They put that all behind him now though. That's great. We love him.

So anyway, so she didn't go to, she didn't go to the Lime event because she had to go to London to get her passport. Oh, that's such bullshit. I love it. She's like,

I have to go and get my hemorrhoid. Anything to fucking not down the alarm gala like anything that's the thing is like while Lisa Rinna goes crazy Vanderpump's in the cut like bitch

I don't believe it either well yeah that's what I think that was the preview right because I think that Lisa Rinna is is furious about it there was that lie

that was like because Lisa Vanderpump allegedly called Lisa Rinna and was like be sure to talk about this. And then Lisa Rinna was like, you called me on the phone, baby. And she's like, no, I just texted or something like that.

That's what the big lie is. Right. I never called you. But Lisa Vanderpump's famous for calling. Like that was the whole thing with Kyle and Brandi Glanville. That every morning, Lisa would get up, call Kyle. She'd be like, Kyle, what are we going to do today with the shoot shoot and then all of a sudden the calls stopped coming and Lisa started calling Brandi Glanville then in the reunion it was like you stopped calling me in the mornings it was all

about the Lisa Van Der Palme call exactly although the thing is that Brandi would complain that Lisa's mother me she's always like she's too much of my face so I was always like well you you're actually basically got like a teenager like oh my god you're like mothering me but then it gets mad when they're feeling like i know it's not mothering i know what you're saying yeah she pissed it all away she didn't want to be a sidekick now she's dressed up like a godiva chocolate but there's no sidekick there isn't that's all right you know what i mean it's all that's that is that's all ego ego I mean Lisa does kind of do like she had Cedric and then she had Brandy

and now she doesn't but part of it is just age I mean she's older like you cannot put a young ho like Erica

in the same room as like a retiring madam and expect them just to sit there and play cards Lisa Vanderpump though is like is a boss

yeah she's an alpha she's an alpha and a boss so get with the boss you want to exactly want to be with the kingpin I don't act like Lisa listen I watch I watch a lot of survivor oh I have not seen last night's episode yet and people always complain about like oh you're playing me you're playing me so

well guess what if they weren't playing you you would have been playing them you think that Lisa sits there and doesn't call someone and say, so today I want to talk about this, this would be good, or you should mention this. You think that everyone else is going to sit there quietly. You know that everyone else is going to say things like, we should talk about this. If you're dumb enough to be tricked into saying something on a phone call, then that's your own damn fault

for being stupid. Yeah, exactly. And honestly, the Munchausen thing, I still believe Okay, so if you take the cynical view which is that Lisa Rinna was not as innocent

as she was when she said I engaged in a conversation that she really just wanted to accuse her without officially accusing Yolanda of Munchausen suddenly no one knew

what Munchausen's meant they're like I didn't know either until she read the definition I'm like where's everyone fucking been but even if she had even if she had done that,

which is shady, Yolanda is the one who has made it into a thing. Because Yolanda could have shot it to him like, oh, that's ridiculous. But instead she starts telling every single person,

what is this munchers and flowers and flowers and daddies and daddies? Julian's her favorite. My children, my children. Oh, God. All right. How could you say

that about my children? And then brings the medical records. She's called my children liars. Your children who have never come out about having Lyme ever. What are you talking about? Yeah, Yolanda completely blew that up.

I'm going to find that Dr. Oz. It's on YouTube. That's how I watched it. It is so juicy. I can't believe more people didn't go crazy over it. You guys text me that. I mean, I will tweet the shit. It's good. To my two followers, but I need to take it to the streets. Well, she tweeted it. That's the thing. Like, she doesn't even see how kooky she is. And everyone's like, oh, you were great on Doc.

I was like, did you listen to Dr. Oz? Did you hear the things he said? My mom said the time in bed? And you've been hospitalized? Her mom was in bed five days a week. You've been hospitalized once. Yeah, and she said, well, and he was saying you've been hospitalized so many times for exhaustion and this, and she said, well, and he was saying you've been hospitalized so many times for exhaustion and this, and she said, well, that first time it was, what did I say? What is that? Something Borealis? Yeah, I know.

Yeah, it's Epstein-Barr. Oh, Epstein-Barr. And one of the commenters was like, oh yeah, it's called Mono. Yeah. And I have known a lot of people with Mono and they weren't hospitalized. Okay, let's keep going. I love that now there were some there were some filler scenes

no don't there were some filler scenes we saw Rinna like packing with Harry Hamlin and his guitar we saw he walked in with a guitar

that's what we were doing that wasn't filler to Julie what were you doing Harry Hamlin you were just strumming some tunes on your guitar you had to walk in with your you know what's easy to do

at the at the at the door prop your guitar up yeah but what's easy to do at the door? Prop your guitar up. So we don't have to see you with a guitar. That's what hot aging guys do here. When they start losing their face, they're like, look! And they whip out a guitar

or like, I don't know, a hoverboard or something. They're like, I'm young! Yeah, I once went to a party and a guy came at this guy's house and we were all sitting at the table and he disappears. He comes back with a guitar. He's about to start any of this. And then we're hanging out there for like an hour and a half.

Him with a guitar right there did not play a single note the entire time. It was just to be like, yo, I got a guitar. It was in his lap? Yeah, he was holding it as if he was about to start. Joey, would that send you? And she saw a human being driving a Lyft with a mustache with what could either be a guitar or a ukulele out of its case in the front seat. And she's like, if that guy is fucking playing a ukulele,

would people get into his Lyft? And I'm like, oh, maybe he's just taking it. And she's like, no. I would tell you. For the pleasure, I'm learning to play guitar. Okay, I'm 40. Carry on. Listen, play the guitar. But I'll tell you what, you'll never

see me walk around with it unsheathed out in the world. Outside. You know where you want to be playing it? On the corner. In the airport. At the cafe. Outside anywhere. Harry Hamlin. Anywhere anyone is around me,

unless it's a performance, I won't be handling that guitar. The number one tweet of all time of any tweet was, if you want to see who the douche is at your party, just leave a guitar out. Yes. Because they're all terrible at it too, the guys who pick up that thing.

So we also saw Eileen fixing Vince's back, which was like, whatever. I think Eileen stole somebody's husband. So she'd have to sit on his goddamn back. Poor thing. Yeah. Put him down.

Put him down. No, she can't handle. She can't handle that. She can't handle. That's true, bitch. So then,

so then, oh, you know, so we messed up, we messed up, we messed up some order up. I guess now was when Erica was talking with her gay employees, whatever. So now it's the airport

and the most important thing is you just mentioned right there that's right Eileen in her overalls which is the second time we've seen them this season that's the most

order buying thing the overalls with like the blossom hat and the shirt and Julie's like it's skin tight and her fucking pussy she's gonna wear it

for 24 hours and the skin tight fucking overall and someone someone I think tweeted at us or wrote on our Facebook page,

something saying like, did you, did, uh, did Eileen realize that they were flying to the mid East, not the mid nineties. Yeah. In the Midwest.

I'm like, it reminds me, I can't put my finger on it. I don't know if it's someone's young mom. Or if it's just someone in high school in the nineties, but like, she seems like she carries a big straw bag that has big flowers on it.

She's like Rafa. We've seen it. She keeps those dresses that are like the black dresses with the flowers all over them. She single-handedly keeps that fashion line alive. She was into that stiff ribbon that you could raffia ribbon that you could make into big bows and put up. And then she shows up and I'm just like

is there never even one insecure thought of like, these people are so rich. It's like, where's that house? Is it in the valley or is it in? It's Malibu. Malibu. But I think they bought that at a lower property value and never did anything to it.

Because there's like faux walls. Like, Brandy was right when she was making fun of her. Oh, and she said, she said said I did a remodel after that it made me think she's worked for 30 years and you can tell that she goes to work and somebody dresses her

every day the thing about soap people this is what she really hits home for me is that in me well I moved here in 2000

into LA I know it's a million years ago but back in the day at that time yeah I was 2001 soaps were like

that was like a that was like the blue collar of the acting jobs. Like, those were the people, like, nobody would do that job. Well, now I feel like it is still blue collar, but everyone's so desperate for work that people will go do it. Like, how, like, James Franco went and did it. Like, anyone will go do it now. The dad from Hogan's family. Right, but at that time, it was like, even young people with no jobs would be like, I won't do a soap. I'm a Stanislavski trained.

I will not do it. But she's done it so long. She's like a career soap person. Yeah, I was a fan of her. She's just like a normal lady. She's just like a lady who lives in a regular town. She's like a lady who works at Luby's. Yeah, she's a regular lady.

Regular weed. She doesn't think like, oh, I need a pretentious bag. They're not pretentious like that. They're like blue-collar actor every day day nine o'clock to five o'clock they don't make five zillion dollars a year they can't be you know yeah it really is like a work and pays like for the nicest dress or the nicest purse on the rack that's a lot to her and then you've got katherine who's never worked a goddamn day in her life giving her shit about it yeah yeah um i didn't have to fuck somebody for this ugly purse.

So now they all, so now the whole gang arrives, the whole gang arrives in Dubai and they come to the Atlantis in Dubai. That place is crazy. It is absolutely insane

how big and over the top it is. It's still just like some gay bar in Vegas. I mean, I love that that, that glass blown thing, like, it is a famous sculpt,

a glass sculpt i'm like really because everyone's like i know that i know the red version yeah it looks like the bellagio isn't it isn't there like a glass yeah that's probably why everyone knows it i know him i know chaluli i couldn't deal with him saying it was beautiful i couldn't i was like taking like an issue with them. Cause it's so beautiful. So I'm like, you can say it's crazy, grandiose. It's like,

the scale is shocking. Off the charts. That's tremendous. Too many syllables. But like to sit there and say, it's a gaudy, tacky piece of fucking garbage. Yeah.

No windows. Every scene was giving, my anxiety was ramping. I mean, we watched it during the day. I watched it when it came on, like at night. And I was like,

I can't watch them eating hummus in this windowless room. Especially when Erica doesn't even know what it is. And then they're going on the balcony and being like, look at this view. The view of what? There's nothing. Of a fake city in a desert where you're being murdered? There were no lights. There were no lights.

This is the worst place in the world. I cannot, I can't even live. I can't even be alive. It's a desert town it's a it's a landfill it's like a fake built town

like a crusade town it's a landfill yeah they filled it to make that palm the palm island they filled it in to make every single part of it

it's like one fucking oil family took it over and bought it like it's the Vatican like I can't live I cannot be alive when people talk about Dubai

United Arab Emirates is a whole other thing, whatever, but this particular city is a fake fucking city. It's fake. Yes. Have you guys ever done a cruise where you pull up to a port and it's like a fake port? No. That's just been, yeah. Wait, what?

What? Like a cruise port? And you go to like the Western Caribbean and there'll be like this weird island. This is real. Like, I've done it so many times with julie and it's an island that's a man-made island okay

so it looks like it's all white sand but it's not a real island like it's all it didn't evolve right it didn't come out

of the ocean it's like a popeye is it like a popeye town in malta what's that when they uh when uh movie popeye from 1980 they filmed that movie Is it like a Popeye town in Malta? What's that? When they, when, movie Popeye from 1980,

they filmed it on that movie. Oh my God. They built that set, the little town. They actually built it in Malta. It was this elaborate set. And then when they were done wrapping, they didn't tear it down.

And it has since been converted into like a tourist destination. You go to Popeye town. Is that famous octopus? I always at that was paramount is that the fake town in Malta I haven't seen it in like years and years years but basically it's like one of those things where it's like so you go do you look at like oh this is so charming but it's it's like a totally

contrived port yeah no this is a fake, but it's like a totally contrived port. Yeah, no, that's what this is. It's a fake island. No one lives on it. Even like Vegas. Vegas is fake too. It's the desert. Yeah, but at least then they will. At this point,

Vegas has a few decades under it. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, but Vegas, like you go past a strip and then you see, you know, like the marshals and stuff.

But this place, what do you see when you pass that? I don't know. I don't know. It's like gay guys hanging from gallows. It's like anxiety because it seems like they're like I don't know. It's like gay guys hanging from gallows. It's like anxiety

because it seems like they're in some weird Iceland. It's all about doing that jeep scene in the next The Sex and the City 2 or on the jeep, right? Yeah.

Coming over the thing. I want to see somebody get thrown off a camel. I mean, that's my favorite Luann moment with a camel trying to kick her off. The best.

So meanwhile, while they're all like gallivanting around and choosing suites and stuff, the presidential suite and the underwater suite, Yolanda is back in Malibu doing the Lord's work, which is overseeing the pack of their divorce home and kissing for one last time in the refrigerator. Oh, when they looked up in the refrigerator and David's like, shouldn't we pack those

vegetables up there? She's like, oh oh that's a plastic i was like poor david standing here even the food is real trying to get a boner realizing it's all been plastic this whole time yeah never actually never going in the fridge and he is like why don't we and then he i think he wanted her to go home or something like that and she's like no i'll have to stay and leave the pack to leave the oh how dare she who is going and leave the pack. Oh, how dare she. Who is going to leave the pack? Did you watch the beginning of last season?

Try and steal a Vanderpump line when you're losing? He just can't even stand to be around her. I mean, I don't feel bad for him for one second because I hate his fucking stinking guts. Yeah, I hate his guts too. When she was like, I'll come up and help you. He's like, no. He's like, I'm going to go up and write charts.

I need to reconfigure Ave Maria for the night. And they're like divorcing in front of our eyes and the production's eyes, but no one really realizes it. But they're trying to keep up appearances. And I actually don't like that she keeps on taking on this thing of like, I guess I was a lemon. Oh, I was a lemon. I was like, listen, Yolanda, I have not been on your side for much of the season. But don't call yourself a lemon. You're sick with whatever it is, but you're sick. And the vow is through sickness or in hell.

It's not, it's, you know, maybe it's your fault that you're sick. But, like, you shouldn't be feeling guilty. I think that's a manipulation, too. Like, she's trying to get him to, no, my God, no, you're not. Or rather than admit that he cheated or he's with the gay guy right or whatever whatever he's doing, right? She still gets the sympathy, but That's what I've read on the internet I'm wondering if you guys have heard that I've heard just gonna make sure this I have heard That it was her but we think that it was...

She found out... Whatever indiscretion she was then made aware of, she left because of that. Oh, because they were saying on the old internet that she left him because he refused to pay

for medical bills. And so she was like, screw you, because she even said earlier in the season, well, Muhammad pays my medical bills, so he so she was like, screw you, because she even said earlier in the season, well, Muhammad pays my medical bills, so he would know.

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, she gets all money from Muhammad for Anmar. He's still underage. Right. Oh, yeah. Not much longer.

So meanwhile, Brandy comes over. And finally, we get our first Brandy appearance of the season, which is really noteworthy because in her confessional, she looks crazy. She looks like Lynn Diamante from Game of Crowns, which I don't know ify because in her confessional, she looks crazy.

She looks like Lynn Diamante from Game of Crowns, which I don't know if you ever watched that when it was on Bravo, but it was an unsung hero of 2014. That confessional is the business. The gold with the hair is like, it's like classic Vicki Gunvalson hair. Her face is like frozen off. I mean. Her low- like frozen off. I mean... Her low-rent Erica costume. It was the same gold thing.

Julie, didn't you say it was a wig? It was everything. Yeah, I couldn't believe it. It was so padded up there. And then everything she said is like, I'm rubber, you're a blue ring. Like everything she said. Lisa Rin is an anorexic with a wig.

So what else and delusional I'm like well I mean she couldn't move an inch like one part of her lip was like

like that like there was like a swollen weird part of her lip it was like that one confessional where her tongue was numb remember the thing

where her whole tongue was numb yeah and she's like I had an allergy to ibuprofen and it was like bitch

please please got Botox in your tongue well so here's a good example of again Yolanda being manipulative because she tells Brandy And she's like, I had an allergy to ibuprofen. And I was like, bitch, please. Please. You got Botox in your tongue. Well, so here's a good example of, again, Yolanda being manipulative because she tells Brandy, Oh, Lisa Rinna accused me of having munchhausenisensin or something like that, which makes it sound so much more antagonistic than it was. What happened was Lisa Rinna brought it up on TV, whatever her motivation was. She felt bad about it.

She went directly to Yolanda and was like, I feel bad because I introduced this to the show. And then Yolanda, she's like, I'm sorry. She said, I'm really sorry about that. And then Yolanda has then been attacking her ever since. But then Rinna got her back because Rinna was saying later in the episode, Yolanda won't forgive me. I mean, Brandy called her daughter an

alcoholic, which she said. Exactly. Brandy didn't. She was like, you know, Yolanda won't forgive me. I mean, Brandy called her daughter an alcoholic, which she said. Exactly. Brandy didn't. She was like, you know, Yolanda, it's like when people, of course Kim's sensitive, or I get sensitive, it's like when people call your daughter an alcoholic and say, don't say this word! But you know what, though? But Brandy stopped over with the D-Y. But Brandy

like, bringing that up on TV is just the same as Lisa Rinna bringing up the Munchausen. Yeah, but Brandy, like, bringing that up on TV is just the same as Lisa Rinna bringing up the Munchausen. Yeah, but Lisa Brandy said sorry for real. Rinna's like, why won't anybody forgive me? Because you never said you're sorry. Even when you said you're sorry, you were doing it in a scene saying Munchausen's 20 times. And then you still said it 20 other times every episode.

Well, but she keeps talking about it because Rwanda just might care. Yeah, that was the thing. It's like, I wish someone could just own, like, Rwanda's sorry. I feel like she's like putting it on a little now she is a little so he's doing now but the point is that I'm Lisa Rinna did go over to apologize for it yeah she did and it would have just ended there it would have just ended there and we would have thought like the housekeeper hadn't come in and said here's what Munchausen's

means since you forgot English yeah or, the health advocate who was crying at the Lyme disease. God, the health advocate. But Lisa Rinna has no credibility now. Now that she's ready to own as ugly as it is, be like, I'm gonna own my feelings about Yolanda. Her credibility through the Brandy Glanville wig accusation.

I mean, that, the credibility was already going. It was like, manic, manic, bipolar manic. The second she's like, that's a wig, that's a wig going it was like manic manic bipolar manic the second she's like that's a wig that's a wig it was like you just saw it

going up in flames the wig or the wig going up in flames the wig the real wig you're talking about Brandy or Brandy or

I think Lisa Rinna's credibility well we've been talking about her having a wig for a long time we've been saying so you have oh yeah

long time but sometimes she's not wearing a wig that's what we say I never thought she having a wig for a long time. We've been saying, you have, Oh yeah. Long time. But sometimes she's not wearing a wig. That's what we say. I never thought she had a wig. She's got like, she's got that natural do, but I think she's got a wig and a case that when she doesn't want to do her hair,

she puts on a wig. I mean, that's what I think. Yeah. Cause sometimes she's got like 20 pounds of hair and sometimes she's got three. Oh my God. What else?

So anyway, so then, um, so then Lisa Vanderpump put on a muumuu and announced that she was a muumuu convert she looked so I mean she looked amazing

I love how she says it she's like oh now I get the muumuu you can just let it all hang out poor Kyle poor Kyle never wins even in muumuu land

she's in like a tie dyed bright pink crazy clown car yeah so then the episode basically ends with them sitting around dinner around the baba ganoush and and basically bright pink crazy clown car. Yeah. So then the episode basically ends

with them sitting around dinner around the Papa Ganoush. And basically, you know, they were saying how Lisa Rinna, she would be, you know, it's too bad she didn't go to New York. You would have learned a thing or two about her.

I don't give a fuck. You would have learned about her still about her life if you had been alive with her. There was a red carpet. I mean, I don't give a fuck. I don't care what you learn. I don't give a fuck. You can do have to be still about alive if you admit to the lie about that. There is a red carpet. I mean, I don't give a fuck. I don't care what you learn.

I don't give a fuck. You can do whatever you want, but you would have learned something. I'm not scared. Real mad, because there is a red carpet And then when she say like,

you're enraged is a strong word. That's what she said, right? She's like, I was enraged by the tweet. She's like, enraged is a strong word. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I get it. I was enraged. Well, Lisa Redman being enraged that someone went to lunch and then everything. That's a losing argument for her. How ridiculous. That's a strong word. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get it. I was enraged. Well, Lisa Rinna being enraged that someone went to lunch and then everything That's a losing argument for Rinna. How ridiculous.

Rinna, that's a losing... She should... I mean, I think the reason why she was saying she was enraged had more to do with just like pre-existing... Well, she said pre-existing stuff.

She was already angry at... She's still mad at Brandi. She's still mad at Kim. She hasn't gotten the closure on that that she wants and she just gets mad. For no reason.

She just gets mad when someone hangs out with them instead of her. So that she wants and she just gets mad. For no reason. She just gets mad when someone hangs out with them instead of her so that's why. Neither thing had to do with her. I think it's sort of text because when you're filming and she,

here's the thing, nobody wants to go to Pasadena, nobody wants to go to Tom, Girardi, and Erica's house for their fucking

dinner party. Oh my God, you know that was like three in the afternoon. They didn't want a deal and so, and they haven't wanted to deal. They're sick of shooting. They're sick of the bullshit. And it's nothing against Eric or

Tom. They don't want to deal. Yolanda hasn't had to go to anything because of her sickness. This was one more thing in a long line of things that she skipped. I always read the subtext. Everything with Mimi and Kim Zolciak where it's like you and your fat tits and your fucking twins. Like we're doing

the work. We're working and we're making a show. You're getting paid and you're not coming to set. And she's like I had to go to fucking Tom and Erica's and she's one more time with the Lime Seeds and I see her on Venice Beach with these two fucking drunk tools and I'm over it. And I got enraged because Harry was waiting for me

with his boyfriend and his Mad Men cast and I had to go to the dinner. I had to take a 210 baby. Because Harry was waiting for me with his boyfriend and his Mad Men cast. And I had to go to the dinner. I had to take a 210, baby. I don't drive the 210, baby. Poor Lisa Renner. Yeah, I think she's pissed that she had to go shoot that shit. Lisa Renner's insecurity is so blatant. She goes to Pasadena, Malibu, then back to Pasadena, then to East Hollywood.

I'm like, this poor bitch can never shoot her neighbor. And I always say, my theory also is that she was the one last season who was like, you know, hello everyone, why are we not talking about the fact that Kim is clearly not sober? And then she got on this big thing with Kim in Amsterdam, and then the reunion, and things got nasty, people on Twitter yelled at her people hate her or whatever and then like the very next day Kim goes off the deep end and it's been just like tumbling ever since and my theory is that Lisa Rinna just wants everyone to say you were right Lisa you were right she hasn't but she's but she's not she's not like she's not

day-class a enough to say I want you people to tell me I was right I told you so I told you so so she's sort of like hints at it she alludes to it but she never comes out and says it so no one has really said like oh we said you were you were right you were right so she has is like unresolved like her like it's right to hang out with them she's like but I was the one who called the bullshit she's right about the most obvious things like we were doing

kim drunk voice in season one it's not like it was a shock or yolanda being full of shit look at her instagram it's obviously all crap but you know

when you're like calling out these obvious things and being anyone it's just rude for you to do it it's not your business lady it has nothing to do with you

they weren't mad that she said she was a drunk they're like we're all aware that she's not sober yeah stop saying it in public we all agreed not to talk about it so she'd stay and keep doing her shit if she admits it she has to stop drinking have you ever hung out with a sober p.m.

not cute listen Lisa was stuck in that car for 45 minutes or an hour so she's been traumatized. She had her own platoon. Okay. Like you hear the music started. I got traumatized too.

I couldn't even watch that scene. It was amazing. And then she's like yelling at her or whatever. Kim's like, hey, here. Well, so yeah,

exactly. So I think that's why I always, yeah. Okay. That's why I feel like, that's why I feel like Lisa Rinna is like, that's why I don't think it's that crazy for her to be like, whoa, I just went through a crazy car ride.

Do you guys know what's going on with Kim Richards? She's crazy. What's going on with her? She has PTSD from that show. Yeah, she has PTSD. The girl's like, what? She's just trying to run around with a slice of pizza at Eileen's house. I'm not saying I justify.

In the husband in the garage. I mean, that was the shit and Brandy going like that she pushed me down the stairs it was a stand as if she was like pushed down a spiral staircase vertigo style as we end this podcast after 20 hours

of talking congratulations that no one's drunk especially me I had a buzz at a moment okay well then congrats to me. We all have red Solo cups, but there's prizes. Let's see if we win. I have no prize. What is it?

There's no prize? Why do you think there's no prize? Oh, you scratch it. You gotta scratch it off. My prize is that my name is here. Okay, what are we scratching? I don't know. I'm scratching the gray part.

I wrote my name. There's nothing under here either. Hand me that cap. What's the point of these? So I think that basically I can scratch it. Basically the reason

why Nothing. I win. What a way to end. This isn't real. It's like Kim Merchard Sobriety. So the thing that

Rinna says at the end though is that she feels and we talked about this she feels like she's being held to different standards. She feels like

it's one thing when Brandy Brandy... Brandy alludes to something about the alcohol, like Bella being an alcoholic, and then Brandy sort of gets off. But Lisa, you know, she says something on camera, and now

it will not be dropped. And I think that's... Creepy. I think that's like, I understand that frustration. And so, you know, what... Regardless of what you think... Yeah, but Yolanda's actually friends with Brandy, and... Yes. If Brandy says mean shit and then apologizes and they go have yolanda's actually friends with brandy and yes if brandy says mean shit and then apologize and they go have lunch that's one thing but rena isn't friends she's just talking all this mad shit and i'm anti yolanda but i still don't think it's nice to be going on tv and talking about munchausen well it's not nice it's not nice but

then how can we say like it's like one thing like we talk about like we don't you know we want on these shows for people not to edit themselves and, like, to speak what's on their mind. And when they're authentic self to what's on their mind, that's when we like them the most. So, like, on the one hand, it's like, it's not. I just know why Yolanda doesn't. Oh, yeah. No, I know why Yolanda doesn't. But I also feel like Yolanda could have just nipped this in the bud. Oh, Yolanda's a crazy bitch.

I mean, at the end. Before we go, I think we should just say next week is going to be, is this the turning point? So good. This is going to be, everyone's going to get drunk. And our Eileen, who clearly is half-assed give-a-shit

with old bipolar Rinna. Because I like Lisa Rinna, but she's now, like I said, with her credibility, she's become the best. She's very wishy-washy. She's very wishy-washy. Both of them have zero going on

in their own storylines. Everything they do is about somebody else and they're not even close with the other people. Like, Eileen's going to get mad at Vanderpump

for asking her a question and outing her as being a cheater when we already all knew that. No one thinks that you're some innocent, you're on your third marriage, lady. She's like, but I want to talk about abuse.

Like, she can't even bring up the right time to, like, exploit that shit. Your Eileen is hopeless. Get out of here. Get a better writer. I mean, yeah, but are Eileen and Lisa Rinna

going to get in a fight? Because it looked like Eileen was losing their mind. They're actually real friends in real life, so they'll fight, but then it's not real. That's even more pathetic because she completely,

when it served her, she's like, I didn't say anything on the beach Eileen wasn't gonna stand by Lisa yeah that's where that's where Rinna can be shady

not shady and then brings it up at every party well Lisa was saying on the beach yeah I did that yeah yeah Eileen loves it

well Eileen's also manipulative too and she likes to accuse Lisa but Eileen is the one Lisa was manipulative I was like she's so manipulative

Eileen is winding up Lisa. Yolanda is winding up Eileen and Lisa. Lisa Vanderpump is winding up Rinna. It's like they're all winding each other up. In the end, congrats, you've made an old person cry. Congratulations. You're going to sit there and watch some 60-something-year-old woman sob while you all go have a drink after.

Yeah, at the end of the day, which one of you guys has a spinoff yet, right? Because last time we checked, Lisa Vanderpump's the only one with a spinoff and probably the only person with a massively successful spinoff. And a spinoff with an after show. Yes. And the restaurant.

The restaurant is really the deal breaker. Every single Bravo person is now doing a restaurant because of that. Even fucking old Todd in Canada. Oh, God. Everyone's doing it. So stupid and Lisa set the set the tone and she she says that it's because you know Maurizio spin-off was against Vanderpump Rules you know guys know that no I guess I was so mad right she was

trying to get a spin-off for Maurizio about called the agency one about the they did a pilot but it didn't with that little lady she was on oh yeah Marissa yeah for one season right so it was with her and because they're

real estate people oh she just got a divorce finally too oh they got I can't believe it took that guy so long she's like I don't want to

fuck my husband that's like her first show it's like her first episode it's like oh poor guy yeah she was you guys thank you so much for doing this show

thank you it was so fun that was fun of course it was like wind up being epic you guys could separate it into two no no no it's the one epic episode just let people go you know what

I'm gonna turn this off you can press pause on the podcast the future is now y'all so thanks everyone for listening why don't you tell everyone where they can find well you're not on social media Pause on the podcast. Yeah, I know. The future is now, y'all. So thanks everyone for listening. Why don't you tell everyone where they can find, well, you're not on social media. I'm on Twitter. Yeah, she's on Twitter. On Twitter.

At the Brandy Howard. At the Brandy Howard. If you like the dogs from the People's Couch, they're at Pee-wee's. Playhouse. The People's Couch? Something along those lines. Pee-wee the People's Couch. On Instagram.

If they go to your Twitter feed feed they'll be able to easily find the dogs and your twitter is at mrjuliegold right yes mr mr

that's right not m-i-s-t-e-r no mr the feminine way mrjuliegold and then we are obviously at

just go to watchwhatcraftppens.com And you'll find all our social media links So thanks guys for coming on Thank you Bye everyone For our bonus episodes And all of our subscriber extras

Become a premium subscriber Over at patreon.com slash watchwhatcrappens For our personal links come to Watchwhatcrappens.com And join us on Facebook at facebook.com Slash watchwhatcrappens.com and join us on Facebook at facebook.com slash watchwhatcrappens to talk crap with all the other listeners. You can post your own articles there. That's basically where we're getting all of our news. So head on over. Okay, guys.

hey prime members you can listen to watch what happens ad free on amazon music download the amazon music app today or you can listen ad free with wondery plus in apple podcast before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com survey