Watch What Crappens - #2786 RHOBH S1418 Part One: Give ‘Em Hell, Garcelle!
Episode Date: April 2, 2025This is part one of a two-part recap!This week on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion, Dorit talks about her crumbling marriage, and Erika, whose season revolved around wallpaper, ac...cuses Garcelle of being uninteresting. You can watch this recap on video, listen to our Traitors bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Tickets for the Mounting Hysteria Tour are now on sale at watchwhatcrappens.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watch Your Crappins ad free right now.
Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch for Crap In.
It's a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about.
I'm Ben Mandelkirch and joining me today as always, the one, the only, the person I'm
most grateful for, Ronnie Karam.
Hi Ronnie, how are you?
Hi, I'm good.
I've been looking all over for my bright light pain and I can't
find it. So I'm just aging, aging rapidly into this recap.
Did you look in the red light district for it?
I did. And I left lamp in what the heck.
So while Ronnie looks for his red light thing,
let me tell you about what's going on over
here, which is that we are, we are through almost all of the tour.
We are, I think we're definitely at the halfway mark for sure.
So next week we are, we have a triple header.
We are going to Boston at the Wilbur, then we're going to Detroit to St. Andrews hall
and then Park West in Chicago.
Three amazing shows.
Chicago is pretty
much sold out. We'll let you know if we can release any more seats for that. But thanks
to everyone who bought tickets for all the shows. Really, we're gonna have so much fun.
We'll have announcements about what shows we'll be covering later this week. Keep an
eye out on our social media for that. And then in May, we are going to Austin, we are
going to Dallas and we are going to Las Vegas. We've never done a Vegas show.
So that's going to be wild.
Our first ever Vegas show.
And then we are hoping to have, well, we do have two more shows that we are adding,
but we are waiting for confirmation on the dates before we say anything more,
but there will be two more cities added to our itinerary.
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we find links to everything including our Patreon. Patreon.com slash watch or crappens
if you want to go there directly. You can get access to things like our weekly bonus
episode and we are recapping what the white lotus we had a lot of fun recapping this week's
episode and my heart was so warmed when I saw a video on Instagram of Guy talk, the actor who plays
Guy talk singing.
I like the way you work it.
No diggity.
I was like, is there anything Guy talk can't do?
Right.
So he's wonderful and go check out our bonus episodes because we have so much fun with
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Hi everyone can see us.
So with that all being said, let's talk about the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion part one.
Let's do it.
What'd you think, Ronnie?
Pretty infuriating episode, but it always is when it's the final, the final,
what do I call them?
That the Fox force, whatever they are now, Fox, Fox force four. Is that how many of them are left?
I guess it's just three left now, right? Fox force three. Yeah. The box, the people and then Kyle
victim me and then, but you know what? I love to yell and scream and rage. And so that's what I'm
here to do today. Party. So it's gonna be a good day for me.
Yeah, it was a very rage inducing episode.
It was funny at first,
but then when they really started to go for Garcelle,
it made me so mad.
Really the turning point was where Erica said
that Garcelle was not interesting,
which we all are like,
you are the last person to talk about this, okay?
And then from that point on, it was just like seeing red.
Yeah, it was just seeing red the whole rest of the time.
But the first part was me.
Stop saying seeing red, I can't find my red light wand.
So here we are, reunion part one,
the cars are arriving in Hollywood.
And the producer's checking with Kyle, of course, first,
cause she's the star.
And they're like, how you feeling Kyle?
Did you catch up on the episodes? You a lesbian yet? And she's like, that's not funny. You
know what? This hasn't been very fun to watch. There's so many snakes in the grass. No one
did anything to you, Kyle.
No one did anything to Kyle.
Literally no one did anything to you except ask you a couple of questions. Calm down.
Kyle is so activated. Like literally, you're right. There was no storyline that was like,
let's take Kyle down. It was Dorit. She had issues with Dorit, which were settled halfway
through the season. And then Garcelle deigned to ask one or two questions about Morgan Wade.
And now she's all super activated about it. She is so over the top. I think the reason why she's
really mad truly is because this was supposed to be her divorce season with Mauricio and instead became
Dorit's divorce season. And I think Kyle is furious and she's like, she's so angry, but she
doesn't want to say this was supposed to be my divorce season. So she's just like channeling it
out on projecting it onto everyone else. Like there's so many snakes in the grass, not letting
me have my storyline, but I think that's what it is. Yeah. I just think she's an asshole and she needs to be a victim because that's her thing.
And don't worry, she'll get it.
But today she came in fighting.
She's like, I'm going to fight today with 20 pounds of fake hair on my head.
And so she did her thing and she did it in a really awful outfit.
I mean, my God, who dressed you?
I mean, tell me what happened? What happened there?
It's like gold sparkles and then it's kind of cut off
and then there's that flesh looking material
that's not the same color as her skin
and it just looks so bad.
It was like C3PO wanted to go to the club, you know?
So, um.
C3P, no ma'am!
I was making an end.
Hey, bitch.
No, C3P, no.
C3P, no.
C3P, ho.
No.
And now, okay, this just in from the robot press.
No, C3P.
Uh, robot press, you don't want to, you do not want to get a bad write up and then robot
press, I'll tell you that much.
Yeah.
They're like, that outfit is not conductive.
So next up, Bose comes and she brought a gallon of water.
Like the pose reminds me of coming to parties with M&Ms in my pocket.
Like what if their food sucks?
You know, you always have to have food sucks? You always have to have
something to eat just in case. And Boze doesn't think they're going to have water at the reunion.
I mean, how have these people treated Boze all year that she thinks she needs to bring her own
water? Bless her heart. Well, there is a low key tradition of watching reunion episodes where you
see people say, can I get something to drink? I'm just like really parched up here.
So maybe she's seen a lot of it,
she's like, there won't be a problem for me,
I'm bringing a hydro jog.
So.
I wish she had pulled it out from behind the couch.
I know.
She's like, you can't make accusations like that.
Hold on, please.
She just brings in a sparklet thing right behind her
and then just like a giant like
bendy like camel back straw that comes around.
She's like, excuse me.
She's wearing one of those hats on her head with a beer inside and a straw coming down
on the side.
She's like, pardon me.
Must stay hydrated.
I invented water.
And Doreen's not comfortable.
She's like, just get me into glam, please.
Please, it's been a long ride.
Don't look at me.
I'm in jog, please. Please, it's been
a long ride. Don't look at me in my jogging pants. Please. Don't look at me until I've
had glam.
So, Sutton goes into Garcelle's dressing room and she's like, well, I got you a reunion
present. And Garcelle's like, oh, that is so nice of you to do that. Yeah, it's actually a cake for my mother
in the shape of a middle finger.
It's really rude.
I just have to do it in order to keep her love.
I paid for it with 30 pieces of gold,
which I was paid to betray you in this reunion.
Do, do, do.
Ooh, I like that she has her own musical singer.
She's like, I'm not gonna let Bravo to do this.
Ooh, I like that she has her own musical singer. She's like, I'm not gonna let you bravo to do this.
So it's 14 times for Kyle Guy is 14 years old
about how old she acts during most of this reunion.
And Garcelle is, Garcelle got a vibrator.
That was the gift, right?
That was the gift.
Yeah, I forgot about that.
She had a vibrator.
Kyle also is-
A literal fuck you gift.
A literal fuck you gift.
Yeah.
Kyle is trying on new personalities today.
So today's personality is that she is going to be into crystals, which she never was,
but whether it was Kung Mincoff or the rocks.
No.
Let me see.
I wonder where she got into crystals. Would Morgan Wade happen to be into
crystals? Hmm. I wonder.
What are the odds?
Yeah.
Should I look it up? Morgan Wade crystals.
Yes, let's look it up.
Where she's like, she's like, I really love crystals. Sometimes what I do is I put the
crystals in my windowsill and I hope for baked beans. You know, I suffer from anxiety.
One thing that always hails me, crystals.
Crystals hail me.
Crystals.
Morgan Wade Crystals.
She has crystal content.
Oh, it just says it's Crystal Khung Minkoff articles.
What the hell?
I'm looking through Morgan's, her Instagram.
So far, it's only allowing me, on the desktop, it's
only allowing me to see a few pictures. Okay, let's see. She's got, I'm sure there's stories.
I'm sure it's not on her grid, but I'm sure there are stories that are like, crystals.
Let me tell you, I looked up to just have better luck to find it without having crystal
coming. I looked up this time, Morgan Wade crystal addiction, thinking, you know, someone that really likes crystals. And it said AI, Al, as I call her, Al says, there's
no indication in the search results that Morgan Wade has crystal addiction or any addictions
beyond her past struggles with alcohol. Also, I wasn't saying crystal meth, Jesus Christ.
Wow, that was, did Kyle Richards write that AI?
There's no indication that she has any sort of addiction
So I really would appreciate just don't talk. She's not signed up for this internet. Okay, like you can't talk about her
I am kind of worried though because now that I'm looking at this her albums are puppets with my heart
Which I don't really get reckless
psychopath and obsessed
Are you writing anything that's not about Kyle?
Blatantly, geez. So, she's not married and does not have children except for Kyle.
Okay. I can't find anything about Morgan Wade and crystals.
I know. Am I still trying to get onto her Instagram? But since I'm doing it on the desktop,
it's like I have to go through so many different hoops to sign in. I've got to get onto her Instagram? But since I'm doing it on the desktop, it's like I have to go through like so many different
like hoops to sign in.
I've got to go to an authenticator.
I'm like, I'm literally losing my mind right now.
And I'm like just trying to find some crystal content.
And it's like, I'm mad.
I'm actually mad right now.
Let me see her crystal content.
Okay, here's, I'm on her Instagram now.
She's playing the guitar a lot.
She loves to sit and play, which you know what?
I respect that.
I would not stand and play either.
I don't know, I don't understand people
who stand and play the guitar.
She does pushups.
She puts her hand through her hair a lot.
And let's see, no crystal so far.
She has a huge bicep.
I'm so jealous of her body.
Her arms and her back are fucking amazing.
Jesus, I have a crush on
Morgan Wade right now. I'm going to start DMing Morgan Wade right now. She's got a Frenchie
with a cigar in its mouth. Is a Frenchie counted as a crystal? She loves her friend. She has
a really cute Frenchie. Let's see here. We're not supposed to talk about Morgan Wade. That's
very anti LGBTQP that Kyle said. We can't talk about that. it'll be so disappointed anti-lgbtqp that Kyle said, you know, we can't talk about I would
I will be so upset if it turns out that Kyle got her crystal thing from
fair Resnick
It's like favorite sick was like I'm really into crystals right now
And I told Kyle you got a really trot you got to charge them in the Sun. It brings a great energy
I'm like, oh man all this time. I thought it was Morgan Wade was just very resnick
Yeah, I went through Morgan Wade's entire thing entire Instagram did not find one crystal
I did however find a lot of flannel. So there's that okay, so
Oh, you know what I found. We know I found here on Morgan Wade's Instagram
Kyle's wardrobe from the past year.
So it looks like this is Kyle's entire stylistic look
is where I use it.
Kyle's personality mood board is on Morgan Wade's Instagram.
Oh, here, you know what I found?
Kyle's personality right here, Morgan Wade's Instagram.
So we go into the room, into the reunion room,
well, first it's the dressing room,
and he's like, hi, Kyle.
So he goes in to say hi to her,
and he asks her about the double standards
because she's asking other people to share,
but she won't share.
And Kyle's like, oh really?
What have we seen from Garcelle's life?
And Sutton, I mean, she has a sustainability life.
Cool, cool Sutton, great.
Kyle, what?
Kyle, do you just,
she just doesn't even realize anything happened in Augusta.
She was like, yeah, we went to Georgia for some reason
and had a meal and then went home.
Thanks, thanks for the free trip.
No suicide storylines.
Yeah, nothing happening with something at all.
We went shopping for furniture in some random lady's house and then something cried about
it.
I didn't even understand.
Thanks for showing us that you like furniture or something.
Yeah.
And let's face it, nobody has the most exciting storylines, personally.
Nobody's really doing that much.
Garcelle, listen, and somebody commented today, you know, you guys,
you guys have been complaining about Garcelle's Beach House storyline for years. Like what that, why are you so hypocritical? Well, yeah, but the point is, we've always said that. It's not like
we've stood back from that. We've pretty much taken the stance that she's really good in the
group scenes calling people out. That's what she's great with on this show. Her alone scenes do kind of suck,
but so do Erica's, so do Kyle's, so do Dorit's, so does everybody's on this show. So give me a
break. It's not about that. The point is, is that Kyle has something that people are asking her
about that she's not talking about. If Garcelle had all these boyfriends and she was refusing
to talk about it, that would be one thing. But the point is, Kyle, you have something that you're
calling the paps for publicly to get all over any press that you can, and then you won't talk about it, that would be one thing. But the point is, Kyle, you have something that you're like calling the paps for publicly
to get all over any press that you can, and then you won't talk about it on the show.
And then you get on everybody else about sharing their life.
It's about you being a hypocrite.
Do you understand?
Yes.
It's not about anybody else's storylines being good or not.
It's about you being a fucking hypocrite as usual, Kyle.
Okay?
Yeah.
And then the added soup song of Erica Jane coming on to
this show, Erica Jane, who we've never seen one of her actual
friends who's not like paid for coming on here, talking about
how Garcelle is not interesting and how cars like who is she's
asking who is Garcelle dating or sleeping with and we've literally
never seen Erica go on a date or be romantic with anyone.
Admittedly, she is technically still married. But the point is she does a lot of talking about guys
she hooks up with and this and that. And we don't see anything. We barely even see her son. Okay.
Yeah, we've never seen her son.
And also, the rumors about Erica are that she's fucking Tom's friend, Jim Wilkes, that lawyer in
Florida, or at least has something going on with this
guy that he's paying for her house and helping her out.
There's a reason she's not completely destitute at this point.
We never hear about him.
We never hear about what's going on with you.
How long did you spend lying about all this stuff going on with Tom and trying to get
Tom an alibi and everything on the show.
And what's the defense? I forgot this word last week too, which I think means I'm getting
it. Oh, dementia defense and all that shit last year. Quiet down, frozen ma'am.
Yeah. Well, either way, Kyle, TLDR Kyle is a hypocrite and Garcelle's beach house, not
interesting, but at least she's, you know, she's trying
to give us something.
At least she's like, all I've got is a beach house and black girl missing.
And that's really all I can give you at this point.
And at least she bought it herself.
She's got two homes that she got herself from working, which we see on the show.
Erica, bring on, you know, Draggy Balls Tom again, please. So then, um, Garcell and Sutton are talking about, you know,
seeing TMZ in the airport and Carl's, Carl's,
Carl's Garcell's like, yeah, well, they saw me in the airport.
And they said that Kyle said we were good. And I said, huh,
are we?
And furthermore, no. So then, um, Andy visits to read and he's like, Hey, hi, Andy.
And he's like, How are you feeling today?
He's like, I don't want to feel leaving tonight thinking, Oh, shoot, gee, I wish I had said
that.
I want to say everything with as bulgy eyes as possible tonight. So then we go to people making their way to the stage and
Garcelle is wearing some crazy jeweled body suit dress kind of thing that she's got gloves
and she's like, I can't even use my phone.
And Kyle is dressed like she's auditioning for that roller derby show on Netflix, whatever
that was called.
Glow, shine, something like that.
Glow, yeah, glow.
Glow, something like that.
And Erica, Erica's asked to, what'd you say?
Glow, she really loves that show, but to be fair, she thought it was about people's foyers.
So Erica has asked about her dress and she's like,
I don't know who made it some random designer.
I had it made, I had it made.
I hope they got paid first.
Well, they're in jail now.
I don't know, they made it for me.
And then I whipped up some charges and now they're in
stings and had some friend at the secret service frame them,
had their adoption ruined
and had them thrown in prison for a while.
Oh, you know how it goes, Andy, fashion's fashion.
So Kyle, yeah, Kyle comes on stage,
but Kyle does not look at Garcelle.
And then, you know, Kyle's like,
oh wow, everyone looks gorgeous.
Hi, Bose, hi.
He's like, oh, hi Kyle. So then Garcelle's like, she was like, Oh wow, everyone looks gorgeous. Hi, Bose. Hi.
So then, um, Garcell's like, uh, she was like telling sudden like, look,
cause not even looking at all. She's pissed so much for what TMZ said.
So then they settle in and
Hey everyone. Welcome to realize as a barrier season 14 reunion.
I'm Andy Cohen. Tonight, I want to welcome you ladies back to the tropical paradise of Saint Lucia. Kyle, I noticed you brought something here and it was not personality for the 14th year in a row.
You did bring crystals instead. What's going on with that?
Yeah, and she's like, there are crystals, Andy. I had to put them outside of my dressing room so that they could charge,
you know, the crystals need to be charged to everybody.
I'm like, yeah, and at least two people on this cast.
Dorit and Erica.
We're waiting.
We're waiting.
Andy's like, okay, and what are these crystals supposed to do?
Bring me strength and clarity,
and also maybe teach me how to open up the second
French door in my room, in my house.
But maybe maybe they'll help me like calm down a bit so I don't end up in the
hospital like Sutton did last time.
Sorry about my esophagus ankle problem that I had last year.
Sorry.
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So, Eric, I can't believe our ears when we heard your song. At first, we thought we were being attacked by mobs of dogs coming down from mountainsides to rip out our throats, but it
turns out it was you and the booth doing vocals again. And it was in a film called Anorak. She
goes, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm a feature on the song the movie it one of the pond or and now it's up for the best movie. Can you believe it?
She's acting like she did that
They have a lot of issues in post-production I said drop in drip and then they did and poof
Here we are. That's picture nominee and future winner. You're welcome everyone
First act of that movie was based on my life. Thank you Pondor
So everyone's like wow, that is so amazing
So congratulations on baby Valley Garcelle
Now, why would you name your baby after an inferior suburb and I live in the valley and I can say that
I can say that. So I feel like I can say that.
Is it true that LVP is in the running for the godmother?
And we see a baby, you know, it's called the Valley.
And apparently, Garstel's like,
ha ha ha ha ha, she wants to be.
Ha ha ha ha ha. So then Andy's like, and is Oliver still going to try to keep it together for all of us. And then he's like, Oh, I'm going to try to keep it together for all of us.
And then he's like, Oh, I'm going to try to keep it together for all of us.
And then he's like, Oh, I'm going to try to keep it together for all of us.
And then he's like, Oh, I'm going to try to keep it together for all of us.
And then he's like, Oh, I'm going to try to keep it together for all of us.
And then he's like, Oh, I'm going to try to keep it together for all of us.
And then he's like, Oh, I'm going to try to keep it together for all of us.
And then he's like, Oh, I'm going to try to keep it together for all of us. Looks like you're in a perfectly fragile state for tonight. When will you be crying and having a panic attack?
Well, thank you, Andy.
So far so good.
I'm gonna try to keep it together for, oh, hold on one second.
The office is closing up.
I'm gonna go to the hospital, be right back.
Boze is there, she's wearing glitter.
Sequin's tool.
Boze loves tool.
Boze is not afraid of a tutu outfit.
She's like, bring on the tool.
I'll wear any tool you give me. I invented tool. She has like this also this kind of like wispy
piece of tool right by like her calf. It's kind of like little parts like I kind of thought Bose
was going to have like just the biggest widest dress in the, sort of like Chanel Ion style. But she actually was
like more just like a normal reunion bigness, except that she had this little sort of like
yellow piece of tulle that was kind of like coming off on the side, which I don't know,
I thought it was funny. It was like, well, I'll give them a reference to a big dress,
but I'll just keep it a normal size dress.
Yeah, and tulle. Don't ever forget it. So, Andy is talking about intentions. Oh, wait, no,
let's not forget, DeRite was featured in British Vogue. It was the bankruptcy edition. Congratulations.
I almost, I went to buy that actually at the newsstand, but they said it was in Chapter 11. So,
I went to buy that actually at the newsstand, but they said it was in Chapter 11, so... If anybody has a copy, I'd love to see it.
It was an absolutely surreal moment, especially when they took the photo of me getting a pie
put in my face because I was in a fountain.
You know, my career has been long and very dandy, but what put it over the edge was Peter
Pean, so thank you, Peter.
Thank you, Peter.
Thank you. Peter Peele.
Talk about a pie in the sky moment.
All right.
Well, does anyone want to set an intention?
I have to set an intention.
Can someone strike these crystals?
They're driving me nuts.
I'm getting too much energy from them and it's making me feel queasy.
And Garstel's like, well, I hope we can talk things through, work them out. And at the end of the day, we can get a cast photo at this reunion. That would
be nice. So please, I implore everyone in this cast, do not walk off the set today.
Okay? Do not, I repeat, do not, because we will be taking a photo of all of us together.
Thank you.
And we know from the reports that Garcelle is not in the cast photo
this year because she walked off. So, this was like one of those White Lotus moments where it's just
a hint. It's a hint of things to come. So, they talk about how the last two years they didn't
because Sutton walked off last year and then the year before. Who did walk off the year before?
Who left the year before? Probably did walk off the year before?
Who left the year before? Probably me.
I probably got so frustrated.
I was like, no, no.
Was the year before at the Diana season?
Diana, Diana, I don't know.
Diana wasn't there, remember?
Yeah, I don't know.
Diana wasn't there because she was,
you need a new wheel in?
She was doing something, AKA avoiding, avoiding.
Accountability.
Yeah.
So, we start with the DeRite segment.
DeRite's entire life changed.
They talk about the divorce, the Chanel, you know, and DeRite has left the building and
a cigarette smoking table lunging forced to be reckoned with has taken our place.
Don't worry, neither one of them pays their bills.
Let's look.
And we see montage, we see first we see PK addressing friends and family being like,
I love this girl.
It's been her.
It's always been her.
And furthermore, I want everyone at this party to know that what's behind this
curtain is not black mold. It's Boy George. Ladies and gentlemen, Boy George, everyone.
It's not black mold, except for what's in the soul, man. Boy George, ladies and gentlemen.
And a boy chained to a radiator.
It's always been you, but not just you, ladies and gentlemen, Berlin. It's been Berlin too.
So we see multiple clips of Dorit's season and Erica is clutching her chest dramatically
as she hears that Dorit is going to separate. And then Andy announces that PK is not going
to be at the reunion, but he did release a statement, babe. We as a couple have been subject to a lot of speculation about our marriage. We've had
our struggles over the past few years and continue to work through them as two people
who love Doritos, chips, sour cream and onion, and Fritos as well. We have two amazing children
together, can't remember their names right now, don't ever call them, don't ever see
them, who cares really? One of them kind of has my face. Bugler and Funyan.
I don't know, I think I named them Bugler and Funyan.
Anyway, go on me.
To safeguard, basically he's like, you know,
Doreen's a monster and she's been a bitch to me
and she's really mean to me and slanderous
and I'm not gonna show up to give her the pleasure
of slandering me in public
Well, I think this was this statement was actually just their joint statement when they separated this is we're still in flashback mode
Yeah, yes, so
Yeah, it's a lot of statements because a lot of lightning. Hey PK
You know what? You should be writing checks to people that you owe money to, okay? Save your writing for a checkbook, sir.
So then we, of course, we're watching like the descent of this relationship and then
Boze shows up in the picture in picture and she's saying, oh, it's terrible to see this,
is it not? And he's like, terrible. It's absolutely terrible. Gee, I can't stand to look at it.
God, and if it powers me to the first seat at the reunion, so be it.
to look at it. God, and if it powers me to the first seat at the reunion,
so be it.
So then-
So then it's like, ooh, ah, ooh.
Lop, lop, lop, lop, lop, lop, lop, lop, lop, lop, lop,
lop, lop, lop, lop, lop.
Okay, so we finally make it.
Just looks like a gigantic water bottle.
Just like a giant hamster bottle.
So then we're back to present.
So Andy's like, okay, let's first talk about the cigarette
that launched a thousand memes to read.
The viewers love to see you smoking.
You know, with me, they just hear me smoking when I talk.
With you, they actually got to see it.
She's like.
me smoking when I talk with you, they actually got to see it. She's like,
but have you been a smoker for a while? Oh, really? Are we, we're
really going to go there? We're going to make me out to be some
sort of smoker. Well, I would just say I've been, I'm a social
smoke. Okay. I smoke in Britain and when I have British voice.
So that would be, yes, I smoke all the time, yes.
Well, indeed the French part of me smokes.
The Israeli part of me holds back a bit,
but the Dutch part of me loves a little poof poof
in the morning, you know what I mean, Andy?
And so I'm just like, oh, so smoking, disgusting.
Well, you know, the Guam part of me,
when she gets stressed, I take a little bit of a ciggy, but then Guam part of me, when she gets stressed, I take a little bit of
a ciggy, but then the Australian part of me, I do a long, slender Virginia Slims, so it's
such a multifaceted experience.
The Puerto Rican part of me smokes a plantain.
You know, when I access my Surinamese self, what I do is I take a pine cone and I smoke that instead.
Yeah, she turned into a stress smoker. That's what happened to Andy.
Kyle's like, can I ask you a question? You never thought you'd be seen?
Because Dorit's like, well, I was smoking because I didn't think I'd be seen. And Kyle's like,
how can you not be seen? I mean, we have car cameras. So, like, I mean, come on. And
she's like, well, Kyle, to be honest with you, I assumed everything was gonna be seen,
but I just didn't give a flipping fuck.
All right, you cooch?
And that's it.
Okay, Kyle, did PK send you a meme about it?
Ha, ha, ha.
Oh, damn. Crcelle on the side.
That was a pretty good one actually.
Andy actually goes that well a few times
and it's great every time.
He's like, well okay, well we got...
I just like that Garcelle's that voice in,
ba dum bum, chika chika.
Ba dum bum, oh yeah.
This is Garcelle.
That's like Garcelle's reunion phase.
Whoa! Oh damn. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do It's like Carcell's reunion phase. Whoa.
Oh, damn.
All right.
Well, we got a cut.
We got a lot of comments by your decision not to tell your children about the separation.
And after Jagger saw or heard your Instagram post, were you regretting your decision to
not sit down with him?
And she was like, no, no, no, I have not regretted my decision.
Not for one second. She's like, well, no, no, I have not regretted my decision, not for one second.
And she's like, well, what do they know?
Well, you know, they're not asking the question.
So I think that what we're doing is we're living in a state of denial and that always
works out well for children.
Yeah.
So Andy is asking about last year.
So Sutton explained that while her kids knew that she and Christian were separated, Dorit elected not to tell the kids. So was that hypocritical of you,
Sutton? And she's like, well, you know, I think that I learned from my own mistakes.
Have we seen Porter? She still looks shell shocked. So that's pretty, but I didn't make
the right choice.
So Dorit's like, well, what were the consequences if you're gonna try to make me seem like
I'm doing the wrong thing?
She's just, well, it's not so much consequences,
just being really honest with your children.
That's how I am.
So they trust me implicitly.
You know, one of my biggest regrets is when I told my son,
hey, I'm gonna send you to Rolls Royce camp in Alabama.
And he got there and it was actually
how to fix a vending machine camp.
And you know, that really hurt things.
So honestly is so important with your children.
So Doreen do you think that you're gonna get back with PK?
Probably not it's not my choice.
PK doesn't want me he's just such a hot, hot machine, hot commodity Andy.
It's hard to get him back.
Well are you still in love with him?
Of course I am who wouldn't be?
The man is like a human hairy duvet!
He's my soul. He's my blood. He's my cholesterol. He is my high blood pressure.
PK is my lipids.
He has so many blood panels. He is my pre-diabetes, one, two and three.
I still wake up in the middle of the night hoping that I could take someone to the hospital
for a arrhythmia or a cardiac event.
But when I wake up, it's only me, Andy.
Me and my good friend Virginia.
Virginia Slim.
And he's like, well, we asked BK if he wanted a peer today.
She's like, I know.
All right, well, America doesn't, Dorizo.
Settle down.
And he declined.
I know.
All right.
And he sent a statement.
I know.
And he loves bugles.
I know.
And he said he wants some Pringles.
I know.
Okay, well, he declined. But he sent us a statement. Guys, let's put up another
poster board of a statement from PK, shall we? So now here's his new statement.
It's very long. But this is the one where he's like, Dorit has called me a bad father. And that statement
is both heartbreaking and false. What I am is a bad dipper. Now, occasionally, I get
a chip into the sour cream and onion and I get it all over the couch. Well, I'm sorry
for that. I'm not the most perfect person in the world, but I love my children, whatever
their names are, and wherever they may be. Pop and corn, I don't know.
My children, Mike and Ike, I'm sure, are lovely packaged, very colorful.
Everybody loves them.
They are two, those children are, they're smart children.
That's why I call them Smarties.
They're just a nice big roll of Smarties. So anyway,
those closest to us know the truth and many have wanted to speak out, but I've asked them not to
because the truth should never need a champion. I refuse to stoke the fire that did not ignite,
but I will have some red hearts if they're offered. The Dorit I married would never have allowed this,
much less caused it, and the woman embodied
kindness, integrity, and grace.
I can only hope this wreath finds her way back to the person she once was, but is doubtful.
And I also hope that as she's finding her way back, if she could grab me an ice cream
sandwich from the freezer, that would be wonderful.
The woman I married was so generous, knowing that I had a wife and children, when she married
me.
It was lovely.
I hope I find that woman again,
and not this judgmental bitch
that we are seeing now on television.
Thank you very much.
I mean, I literally did a pretty woman cosplay for her
and she complained.
It was the wrong song, Indy.
It was supposed to be Roxette.
It's very important to the Swedish side of me.
Huge mistake! Huge! Big! Huge!
Do you know how long I've been practicing stepping on divots? Every time I do it I pretend it's Coil's face.
I'd wish it was. Pretty woman, Jason Alexander could have hit on me and it would have been an
upgrade. So Dorit's like, PK, he could have been here and he could have and I would have supportive
of it and I said, I don't want to be in a position where it's only one side being heard. And he's
like, well, he keeps saying that you've changed. He's referring very pointedly, which is funny
because I don't think of pointiness when I think of PK.
I think it's sort of more like round and soft,
but either way, he's referring to it pointedly
in the statement that the old version of you
versus the new version of you.
What's the difference to read?
Well, I'm sorry for contouring,
but this is my nose and my chin.
And those lines that you see under it every time I lie down are natural, Andy.
Thank you very much.
We are talking about your face, Tareed.
We're talking about your personality.
My face is my personality.
What else do you want me to talk about?
The cc's on your chest?
Well, fine.
Well, I guess part of your shtick is the clothes and the glam and all that and you know, you
love it, it makes you happy.
But maybe was that a point of contention with him?
Yes, I mean, at some point, you know, yes, it's not a driving force, but you know, look,
gee, he loves all of this, you know, he loves it when people come up to him and offer him
a, you know, a nutter butter.
But you know, sometimes he just, I think he's just jealous of me.
But he always loves getting his picture taken. That's part of the job he's always loved.
Now that happened even before Real Housewives of Boothly Hoods. We'd go to a mall and children
would come up and ask for his picture and say, Santa, why have you cut off your beard?
He would just look at them and say, listen kid, I'll tell you the secret, if you go to
Hot Dog on a stick and get me something, which I always thought was very cruel.
It's called Queen Pro Quo.
He was so disappointed when he found out that it was called Squid Games, not Quid games. Well, you know, if I haven't changed in 14 years then something's
wrong with me! Who doesn't change? Anybody? And so basically she's like, you know, did
fame change her? Maybe, you know, she goes, well, I don't know if it changed him. You know, I mean, I guess
it was hard for me to see things in a certain way. Like the first time PK came out in his
tighty-whities.
Kyle, do you think fame has changed Dorit? And Kyle's like, um, I think this season I
saw Dorit. I didn't know. I mean, you have to agree with that yourself. Well, does that
have to do with fame, Kyle? It's like, did Dorit suddenly become more famous and then
therefore change the season? You just use this as a wedge to get in there and complain
about Dorit. And so she's like-
Well, I mean, what changed about Dorit this season? She stood up to you for once, Kyle,
and she didn't have your back on every single little thing. And she actually yelled at you
once. So that's what changed. And now she's going to pay for it. Yeah, Kyle's like, I mean, it just seems like everything was like different.
She seemed angry. She seemed like a lot more aggressive than usual. We just saw,
and I don't think it was a very different side. Like I know her so well, like, cause I,
let me tell you something. Let me just say, I know Dorit so well, and this is a new side of her. I
know her so well, but also like we're barely even friends, if you remember from last year. So it all makes sense, everything I say.
So can I just say, I've been reading this a lot
on the internet, seeing it on the show,
everybody's talking about how much Dorit's changed.
Dorit's the same as Dorit's always been.
I don't see any change in Dorit.
Dorit is 100% the same.
Dorit's exactly the same.
She is the same, she is the same shallow ass
wearing fake ass things using fake ass money.
She said the C word a few times and ripped a cig.
That's like the only thing that she did differently.
Actually she was doing the C word thing last year.
Dorit hasn't changed.
I hate this take from Kyle, like usual, but I hate this take from Kyle because Kyle is
using this against Dorit.
When Dorit is going through a life change,
we joke about PK, but Dorit is going through a divorce and sounds like it's a bad divorce.
And Kyle's acting like it's so shocking that Dorit is making a change, that Dorit may be
more chippy than usual, maybe more angry than usual. When Kyle went through a change all
of last season and she was asking people to hold space for her to be, um, to be open to her
to understand that she was changing and then that's okay. And yet when it comes to Dorit,
suddenly Kyle has a real issue with it. And this just speaks to Kyle's overall hypocrisy in general.
And it also like, it makes me also furious that she says, I know Dorit so well. Um, and I can see
this is a different side from her when last year, she literally was on this reunion
saying that like her friendship with Dorit is overblown and
they've only hung out like two times outside the show. So she
can't have it both ways. And she's being a dick and she's
allowed to have a moment of change but then Dorit isn't.
Yeah, exactly.
Here comes one right now.
Here comes one right now. So Dorit talked about PK's temper, even went as far to call him the monster.
Well, to be fair, the first time I ever heard that about PK was at a public swimming pool.
So it's not like I came up with it or anything.
And also Snoopaloop777 on Twitter says, and then Sutton just goes, Snoopaloop.
I don't even understand.
Sutton's just disgusted that someone would be named Snoopaloop.
So they said, Kyle saying she's never seen that side of PK. So maybe Dorit's just exaggerating
to manipulate her side of the story.
Feels like someone undermining domestic abuse victims.
Snoopaloo777, don't know ya,
but may I present you with a ding, ding, ding?
Mm-hmm.
So Dorit's like, definitely one of the things
that hurt me the most, Kyle, watching that,
you're supposed to know my way better than you know him,
but know me way better than you know him,
because you only have a relationship
where you have memes and jokes, remember?
And Carl's like, ummmmm.
And Garth's all nods like, that was a good one, Dureet.
Wow, maybe Dureet has changed, because that was decent.
Chicka, chicka.
Ah.
So.
And you certainly don't know him as well.
So you, so you not having seen that wouldn't have been, you wouldn't have been usual and
cause like, um, okay, so let me try this one.
I think like I was coming from a place that he wasn't here to defend himself.
And you know, like you, you know, you hear something like this and he's like an alcoholic
and he's bad.
And now I'm hearing a monster.
I'm just thinking like, it's just like not fair to go after someone who's not here to
defend themselves.
Like, you know, my sisters for over 14 years in various states of argument, et cetera.
Or your husband who you came on, who you came on last year and completely dragged through
the mud and said, suggested that he was cheating
on you, but never told us who and never told him that you said that on camera.
And all the other shit that you said about your husband, you don't even see me standing
up for your husband.
I mean, come on now.
Yeah.
I just think it's very selective when Kyle decides to be virtuous about these sort of
things.
Like, oh, PK deserves, listen, he's not here to defend himself.
And you still
want to say that you're a girl's girl when your girlfriend is like, I'm going through
divorce and he's awful to me. And like, can you imagine she's like, Yeah, well, he's not
here to defend himself. So I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna like doubt what you say instead.
I mean, and then you want to say you're a girl's girl? Really? Really? Yeah. So then
Dorit's like, well, I didn't say he was an alcoholic. He was open about it. He was
open. And she goes, but you said it on camera. Yeah, but so did you about your husband. Who's
standing up for him? Yes, and he said it before that, but not on camera. He said it publicly.
Oh, he said he stopped drinking, right? He doesn't use the word alcoholic on camera.
That was the first time I heard it. When you said it, you betrayed PK.
On camera. That was the first time I heard it when you said it you betrayed PK
Kyle Richards getting mad that certain things were revealed on camera and then later in the episode is gonna say what else do you want for me? Okay, I'm being as open as possible
While she's championing keeping things off camera right here
So then Sutton's like well to me it looked like you were throwing your husband under the bus
Do you know how dangerous that is for the bus? There's not a lot of clearance under that chassis.
So, it was right out of the gate and you just kept repeating it over and over. Let me just say
right now, poor PK and also PK's poor. Okay. Both of those things. Poor K, can we just call him that?
I'm gonna call him that, poor K.
It's Spanish as well, it means what?
But, you know, just go with it.
I fully am on Doreen's side about this.
I think that like, it sounds like Pique
is a monster behind the scenes,
but she did come onto the season
and we joked about it quite a bit.
She came onto the season like,
oh, what a lovely time off. PK is a severe alcoholic. Anyway, could someone please pass
that lovely canopy? Is this a pig in the blanket or is it a PK is a severe alcoholic in a blanket?
What's it called again? I'm sorry. You've been to AA. Good for you. Do you know of something called
Good for you. Do you know of something called
Severe Alcoholic Anonymous?
How did, Sutton, did you paint your house,
is this a shade of, Pique is a severe alcoholic
or is it more of a cream?
And to me it's like, well, it's not that way I suppose.
But you know, when you said that in your confessional,
we were talking about my issues in our marriage
and the separation and you diminished it.
Like, ooh, maybe she's taking the opportunity to paint him in a big leet.
Well, where I was in that moment, because I felt like you were like exaggerating a lot
of things about me. So when I saw those comments about PK, I thought like, well, maybe she's
exaggerating that too. I don't know. What did I exaggerate? Um, I think we're going
to get to that?
Well, no, no, I'm just curious. What did I exudrat?
Well, when you acted so upset at Sutton's, you didn't even know I had sent PK a text yet.
But I wasn't talking about the text. I was upset with you for other things.
Yeah, but also I sent you a text that was never acknowledged and she's like, Coil, you sent PK a text first. Okay, you only sent me a text because Erika told you to send it. And then Kyle's like, show the scene, roll the tape. And they do.
Show the scene of me organically sending a text message to Dorit.
And it shows that Dorit is telling the truth and that Kyle only sent that text because
Erica told her to.
Yeah, Erica, because this is new footage.
It's unseen.
And Erica's like, so I just jumped off FaceTime with Dorit and I asked her, has anybody reached
out to you?
And she said no.
And Kyle goes, okay, all right.
Okay, I'm sending it then.
Okay, because like I wrote a text last night and I'm like, you know what, don't do, I
don't like that. I don't like that. I'm going to send my text because like, I don't like that.
No one's reached out to her. So I like that Kyle had draft. I don't think she even had drafted a
text by the way. She's a liar. She's just saying she drafted it so she could use it right now and
say, I wrote it the night before. I just didn't send it as if that would matter. I'm going to
draft this text, but I'm going to sit on, I'm going to say, I'm going to write a text that says,
Hey, I'm sorry. You're going through such a shitty time. I love you.
If there's anything you need, just let me know.
Let me sit on that for a moment.
You know, that might be too inflammatory.
Maybe there's a better time to send this.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So Kyle, typical.
So she's like, we weren't even speaking, but I still sent the text because I absolutely cared
about you and I felt bad that you guys were so brilliant,
but you chose to see the worst.
You chose to see the worst because, Queel,
you keep missing the whole text message thing.
It's about you justifying the text message thing.
Do you understand?
By the way, okay, Garcelle, did you reach out to Dorit?
And Garcelle's like, no, I didn't.
And I know why I didn't because she's a fucking bitch.
I don't like her.
I hate the bitch.
Mm hmm.
Bow bow.
So then Kyle was like, nobody else did.
Okay.
Instead of saying none of these women did, Kyle did.
Okay.
The whole season.
You never mentioned in that like, it was me.
I reached out to you after you told Erica that no one ever reached out to you
And then I said that I had drafted something and then I really hadn't so I texted you something. Okay, so no
I don't want it. I don't want to say that at all
Coyote we were talking about the fact that you sent him a text before me
And then he's like, okay, let's move on. Oh god. Oh god. Okay. How long has PK been sober now? And she's like,
Andy, things are trying to escape out of my mouth.
Are we talking in American months or British months? Because the answer
answer. It's six months later over there, you understand? Spelled later L-A-T-R-E. So... Not to be theatrical.
I would like to center R-E this discussion on me right now.
And that's moi over there. Oh, I'm sorry, that's me at the...
Well, it's not a topic that we discuss, as I've discovered very recently.
Dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot.
Okay.
Dot dot dot.
Well, I just can't answer that.
Dot dot dot.
Dot dot dot dot dot dot dot dot. So Erica, this is a setup here. I'm telling you, she whispers to Boz,
is he not sober? Okay, Erica, you know, because you are friends with Dorit, you know that Dorit,
of course, has told Erica like, PK has fallen off the wagon, which was too bad because he tried so
hard to get onto that Reese's Pieces truck, but now he's off of it. And, um...
To be honest, he's never stayed on a wagon his entire life.
His visitors don't sit well with him. There are pictures of P.K. as a tiny child in a little red
wagon, one leg in, body out, blobbed on the ground, crying.
body out blobbed on the ground, crying. Although he does love Wagamama, but it's not quite wagon mama.
So basically Erica knows, in my opinion, Erica knows that Pika has fallen off the wagon.
So for her to whisper loudly in a stage voice, which was not unlike the stage voice Sutton
used at that party in Oceanside at the dinner for Erica to say, is was not unlike the stage voice Sutton used at that party in Oceanside at
the dinner for Erica to say, is he not sober?
I mean, that's like, she's using her to bring it on TV.
Yeah.
Because I wouldn't have made that lead from how they were talking.
Would you?
I wouldn't have made that lead.
I just thought she was like, I made the talk about it because he told me not to talk about
it.
I made the leap because I mean, Dorit had he told me not to talk about it. I made the leap because, I mean,
Dorit had a very effective like,
oh, is he sober?
Um, well, I don't talk about that until very recently.
It's like, yes, okay, so she wants,
this is her way of like blinking twice,
like the officer, are you in trouble, ma'am?
Blink, blink, blink.
This was her way of signaling.
And so Erica was like, for those who didn't pick up on it, I'm I will say it because I don't care if P.K. gets
mad at me. So she says it. That's what I fully that's my theory.
Yeah. So Andy's like, so he's drinking again. You don't want to say that. She said, well,
I have no idea. His exact words are burp. It's something I'm choosing not to discuss. Then he falls down, then he gets back up,
then he coughs and a blue cheese stuffed olive comes out. And he says, I will not discuss
this with you. Then he burps again and goes to sleep on a stack of hay. What am I to make
of it? I don't know what his drinking is between him and the feather that he's popping up from
his mouth while he snores.
So Dorit is like, you know, Andy's like, well, do you have any concerns?
Big!
Well, in fact, in that moment, Andy, the way you're making me feel in this moment, I don't
think I can have a relationship with you, even a friendship. And that was less than a week ago. And I stand by it, Andy. That's what I said
to him. Hey, wait a minute. Is that my living room table? And we look at the set and it is, in fact,
Erica's living room table. Someone posted that on Reddit a few weeks ago. And I mentioned it on the
show thinking it was a different reunion that Erica just thought, Erica went to a reunion
with like, can I have that coffee table on poor?
And they gave it to her.
So I resent that I was mistaken.
Well, it could have been.
So Erica's like, sorry, that's just the way my mind works when I want to get my friend
out of trouble, I'll throw a distraction.
Andy's like, okay, great.
Sutton, you have a lot of opinions about
PK and DeRid's finances. If they divorce, what do you think forensic accountants will find?
She's like, oh, well, I don't know. Those forensic accountants will get you. I'm assuming you have
money in the first place, which she doesn't. But you know, if you did, they'll get you.
Now, you know, Andy, everyone knows that I have used forensic accounts, but I've never used
forensic accountants, which is what they use. So I'm not sure if it really works the same way for poor Reet and poor Kay.
But we'll see.
We'll see.
Are you worried about her?
Yes, I am.
Oh, really?
Gee, you have to actually care about someone, have compassion, like for someone to actually
be worried about them.
That's not true.
I do.
I'm worried about people I don't care about all the time.
Aren't you? All the time. I'm worried about Teddy. I's not true. I'm worried about people I don't care about all the time. Aren't you?
All the time.
I'm worried about Teddy.
I never even liked her on this show.
I'm like genuinely worried about Teddy.
I've been worried about people.
I got worried that a lady in the grocery store the other day that had lettuce, apples, and
a 12 pack of Snickers bars.
And I was like, that poor lady thinking that she has to buy the healthy stuff as well.
Just get the Snickers lady.
I almost wanted to pull her to the side and say, look at yourself.
Thank you.
This is Andy Gwani.
Worrying is my greatest hobby.
Worrying is my greatest hobby.
I'm a big, you know what I am?
I'm a worry wart.
And I am a full-fledged worry wart.
And you can worry, I agree, you can worry without caring about the person.
So Sutton has a very political response where she goes, not political, politicians response.
She goes, I just worry for all women.
Thank you, Sutton.
Thank you, Sutton, for being concerned.
A woman who doesn't belittle other women, as Erica Wood said.
I'd just like to get that onto the record.
Thank you.
Thank you, Amy.
I'm a champion for women.
So she's like, how could you worry about me?
You don't care about me.
And she says she worries for all women and Sutton's like, it's true.
I mean, now, whose name is on the mortgage?
I worry about that.
Do you know that?
Andry, it's like, where do you really think I'm going to sit here and answer any questions that you're asking me?
I'm talking about supporting women. I'm talking about you having
compassion for women. It's not about whose name. It's on the mortgage.
Her name is not on the mortgage. The mortgage is an LLC. And I think Dureet has like 5% of that or something. That's what
I read on Reddit, which I believe everything. I believe everything I read on there.
Yeah. So Sudden is like, I'm sorry. I just heard that.
I was waiting for you to, I was like, wow, I can't believe Ronnie didn't react to me.
I was going off about some nonsense. I'm sorry. I was like, it's fine.
It's fine.
Wait till it's been, Debbie, here.
That the mortgage has not been paid.
I'll have you know our house is the name of little Debbie, and she is a financial wizard,
according to what PK says.
So, um, a certain someone's like, well, you should know whose name is on the market.
And she's like, what did you say? You're worried. Well, you have to like someone to worry. And she
goes, well, you know what surprised me when I got divorced that I had two baseball teams. Okay.
That surprised me. I didn't know. I love that flex. She's like, you know, it'll be so fun when
She's like, you know, it'll be so fun when I found out that I had two baseball teams and Dorit is going to find out that she just has a bag of bazooka Joe gun.
She's going to find out that PK ate two baseball cards.
You know, you got to look into that.
And so Andy goes, well, yeah, but that's a nice surprise.
Well, yeah, I mean, it was a nice surprise, you know, but it was a surprise.
And communication in a marriage is so important.
It's just really, really, yes.
And Andy's like, so is the house under foreclosure?
No, it's no.
PK says it's actually in the freezer because Sarah Lee is apparently our, she's overseeing it.
It's in shrink wrapping closure,
which is where you have to put diddy debbies
when they go bid.
You get mice on the mouse.
So Andy's like, well, there's reports
that your house is in foreclosure.
She goes, no, there were reports that it was in pre foreclosure.
Now that's a totally different thing.
You know, PK told me that the mortgage rates magically changed.
And so he had to get on the phone with a guy and the guy wouldn't call him back.
So he said, I'm not paying until the guy calls me back.
As you do with mortgages.
Doesn't everyone agree?
Who here doesn't hear from the mortgage person?
Once a day at least.
Call me back.
I think we all believe that when you are sent a bill,
you don't pay it until someone calls you up on the phone
and says, hey, where's my money?
That's just the way you do it.
And both goes, that's how you lose a house.
Shut up, tool, you're supposed to be on my side.
Now, he resolved it.
Oh, sorry.
It's okay, because P.K. says we have plenty of money
in a Swiss bank, specifically a bank called Swiss Rolls.
Either way, little tabby's on top of it.
To prove it, he pulled out a sack of gold coins,
he unwrapped one and ate the chocolate inside of it.
And I believed every word.
So he resolved it. They ended up calling and that's what he said. He said there were some
sort of collection agency and of course when someone calls to collect, you give them something.
So it's all fine. I don't see what the problem is. I'm a collection agency as well, Andy. I've got a lot of she-she's up there, a lot of see-sees.
Lots of them, Andy. Collection girl to collection girl. They let us off, Andy,
because they called back. It's like, oh, okay. Makes total sense.
Everything's fine. They just called. Have we paid?
So she talks about how hard it is and her heart's so broken.
It's breaking in a million pussies, Andy, a million pussies. A million pussies? No,
don't be disgusting. A million pussies. So Sutton's like, they take a break and Sutton's
like, by the way, Garcelle, when things get bad,
I'm just gonna look over here and just, you know,
just give me some happiness and some joy.
And she like places her palm on Garcelle's hand.
And Garcelle's like, well, I can't touch you
because I'm just gonna get stuck on you.
You can touch me, but I can't touch you.
She's like, hey, sorry I'm not paying attention
to any of this, but I just came up with an idea
for a Lady Gaga cover.
Of all my little pussies, Of all my little pussies. Of all my little pussies.
Pondahor! Pondahor, bitch!
P.K. has a song, but it goes,
A million nutty bodies. A million nutty bodies.
Apparently that's a Little Debbie specialty,
which I didn't understand about
until I went to check in on our mortgage.
Okay, so Dorit's a victim and never lies about anything.
So we've got that covered.
I wish they had like a montage of Dorit and PK
just being full of shit over the years
and all our fake businesses
and all the times that they're bankrupt and all the the years and all our fake businesses and all the times
that they're bankrupt and all the times
that they claim to be robbed and all the times,
all of this shit, we really need that editors,
where are you, okay?
Stop building up Dorit.
If you're gonna rip everybody down,
rip them all together evenly.
Yeah, I'm okay with not ripping down Dorit
because right now Dorit's doing a good job
of coming for Kyle.
So like, I'm gonna give Dorit a little,
I'm gonna let her have a, I'm gonna prop her up a little bit. Okay, that's fair. That's fair. But I, you know,
I really do want them to at least show that scene when they were grilling PK and Dorit in the
confessional about the finances and all the rumors about the fraud and all the other stuff that
they've been accused of over the years. And they kept trying to distract the cameraman so that they
wouldn't use the footage. And he kept being like, oh, that's all bullshit. None of that happened to
me. It's like, yes, it's bullshit. And then she would pick up a big loud potato chips thing and
start rustling it and then eating the potato chips so that they couldn't use the footage.
And then they ended up using the footage anyway. I mean, come on, man. You've got so much gold on
to eat. Yeah. Yeah. And there's still that video of the woman confronting her at that hotel, you know, by
the pool.
Oh, yes.
Like, why haven't you paid my friend for Beverly Butch?
So we're back with the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion.
And this year we met new housewife Bose, a high powered executive who quickly went up
the corporate ladder even faster in a relationship with Gilly. But some people here thought she should add one more creditor. Uber, impressive resume, get it?
Jareet's spokesperson. Let's take a look. So we see a montage of Bose this season and it's
a whole big montage. That's very exciting. And just to keep it fair, Boz's personal storyline is boring too.
Everyone's personal storyline on this show
is pretty boring, let's say.
Boz is-
Is that just for greets?
Yeah, I mean, yeah, kind of.
I mean-
Well, cause she's going through something saucy, right?
Yeah.
But Boz is just, Boz's storyline is boring too, yeah.
But Boz really excelled in the group scenes, I think,
and with the other ladies as well, just like some of the,
and that's okay, yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Yeah, I'm just pointing it out
because it becomes a big deal later
on who's boring and who's not,
and I'm just here to say, you're all pretty fucking boring
until you're together and then you're magic.
So, you know, what can I say?
Will Bo's, you strike me as someone who does their homework.
Did you watch the show beforehand?
She's like, yes, I did.
I watched the show beforehand on the TV, a TV that I built myself.
It's like, okay, well, what's the difference between watching the show and being on it?
Well, there's a big difference.
Watching it, you're like, I hate these bitches.
But then being on it, you're like, I hate these bitches, but in person.
You know, I used to watch it in a bathrobe
on my couch and now I watch it wearing tulle in the actual scenes. And it's pretty amazing,
Annie. Pretty amazing. But basically she says that she thought a lot of stuff is exaggerated
on the show, especially the relationships and how they fight and how offended they get
at each other and how close they are. but it turns out they're very real.
And you spend a lot of time together when you're shooting and it gets intense.
And then we talk about her losing her Malibu house in the fire, which is crazy and so sad.
Yeah.
She talks about, you know, I'm sorry.
Oh, I thought, sorry, I thought you were moving on to Keely. Sorry. Go.
Oh, no, no. I was just going to say she talked about how she, that was the first thing that
she really bought herself and she came from nothing. And so to earn that was, you know,
a huge deal to her. So to lose it was, you know, not great. So yeah, that's, that's pretty bad.
I have nothing to make fun of there. Yeah, that was, that was really sad. And then she talks about, they move on to Keely and she says they're doing
great. And he's like, so what sort of response have you gotten to your relationship? Well,
it's been a mixed bag. Some people think there's a bunch of red flags. And some people think it's
great. And some people question the fact that at the time we hadn't said, I love each other. I'm
like, I don't think anyone said it's great. I don't mind Keely, but I also feel like, yeah, this is Red Flag
literally all over it. Yeah. I mean, I felt that way watching it too. It could have just been
because they're on TV for the first time and it's this, they're trying to be like, okay,
let's have a romantic scene. And I guess that could be awkward, especially for the person not
really cast on the show, like him.
But whatever.
I mean, it was boring.
And it reminded me of Dr. Simone on the Married to Medicine reunion because she's talking
about somebody talking, somebody on Married to Medicine saying they wanted to have kids.
And Simone's like, Andy, you do not have children when you're 50.
You're 50 and then you're 80 when they're
getting married or whatever. Who wants that? And Andy, who did that recently, he was older
than 50, I think, is like, God, God damn.
Pete Slauson Every now and then he gets hit by shrapnel
on this stuff.
Andy It was so funny. But I mean, that's kind of how I feel about it
just because I am almost 50 and I just think for myself,
well, I've never wanted kids.
So that's never been my instinct,
but my instinct is, oh, cause I have friends
who are around my age having kids
or getting ready to have kids.
And I'm like, oh my God, like, aren't you tired?
Yeah.
I'm exhausted.
Like, how are you going to do it?
That was my feeling on the storyline.
But you know, more power to you. Go for it. If you want it.
Yeah, obviously, definitely.
Congratulations, you've reached the end of part one of a two part recap. For part two,
go look for the recap that says part two. See you over there, suckers.
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