Watch What Crappens - #2792 RHOA S16E05 Part One: Out of this Twirled

Episode Date: April 7, 2025

This is part one of a two-part recapIt’s the episode we’ve been bracing for on Real Housewives of Atlanta.  Kenya brings on her own demise when she displays posters of Brit at her ha...ir spa opening. It’s… not good. To watch this recap on video, listen to our White Lotus bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Tickets for the Mounting Hysteria Tour are now on sale at watchwhatcrappens.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watch Your Crappins ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is Mr. Ronnie Karam. Hi Ronnie, how's it going? Good, what's going on with you? Not much, just gearing up for a really big week, both in terms of recaps and in terms of travel and live shows.
Starting point is 00:00:51 We've got a lot going on. Today we're going to recap last night's incendiary Real Housewives of Atlanta. Over on Patreon, we are going to do a double bonus episode covering the finale of White Lotus. So that's at patreon.com slash watch where crap happens. Please join us for that. You can also get our videos there as well. Then we also have a full slate of our normal recaps. We are going, we have three live shows this week
Starting point is 00:01:21 in Boston, Detroit, and Chicago. In Boston, we're going to do the Beverly Hills reunion. And then Detroit, we're doing the classic Vanderpump rules episode. It's not about the pasta, which is great episode. And then on Saturday in Chicago, we are going to do summer house. We also have just on the feed, we'll have, you know, all sorts of other stuff. But we since it
Starting point is 00:01:45 is such a busy week for us, we originally were going to start our Top Chef coverage this week, but we're just going to push it back one week to next week because we just have a lot going on. And it's just as simple as that. So thanks for your patience on the Top Chef front. And we hope to see all of you over at our live shows. Go to watchcrapins.com to get tickets for our shows and then in May we're going to Austin and Dallas. Those will be amazing shows because Texas always turns up and really it's we always have a great time there and then in May also after that we have our very first ever Las Vegas show so we still have a lot of stuff on the calendar and we're just excited about all of it.
Starting point is 00:02:27 Can't wait to see your faces and excited to see some new faces in Vegas, by the way. That's gonna be that'll be a new face experience for us. So everyone go to watch for crappers.com and get your stuff and we will, you know, see you there. Anything to add to that, Ronnie? No, nailed it. Did great. Nailed it. Nailed it. Nailed it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:45 Okay, so this is the episode we've all been waiting for for Atlanta. What did Kenya do? What exactly did she do? Because at the time when this happened, people were putting out fake pictures on the internet of Kenya posing next to a poster board of like Brit with a dick on her face and stuff. So I was like, what happened? Also since last week, you know, the fighting on the internet, you can always just rely on the internet to fight over the dumbest things, which I love you internet. You know, with the world tearing down among us, it's great to be able to spend hours upon hours on Real Housewives of Atlanta threads, reading what everybody's pissed about. So, there's been a big war about like, you know, this is unfair to Kenya. Brit was the one who threatened to pull a gun and all this.
Starting point is 00:03:35 Well, then they released the tapes, which were Kenya from season six threatening to shoot Phaedra and her donkey booty and then pulling out her gun. Now, this was all at her house when she was talking to Brandon, but they were like, since when is Kenya so upset about gun stuff? She threatened Phaedra with the gun to the point where Phaedra showed up with the bodyguard of the reunion and all that, which I totally forgot about. I have forgotten about that 100%. I remember that Marlow had guns. She showed us a tour of her guns. That's all I can remember in terms of that. So then, I love a law show. I love a legal show like a Matlock or a Good Wife, my personal favorite, the Good Wife. And if this was a
Starting point is 00:04:14 Good Wife episode, you would have had this whole episode being like, justice for Kenya. And then the defense pulls out, dun-dun-dun, the tape of Kenya doing the gun thing. And I think any reasonable TV jury would be like, well, then Kenya's fucked. You know, like, Kenya just sunk her case. So I almost felt for Kenya when that all came out. And so, you know, anyway, I'm just saying that to kind of update you
Starting point is 00:04:42 with my personal feelings on what's been going on. I'm like, what the hell? Now, after I watched this episode, I was like, oh yeah, yeah, Kenya's fucked. Yeah, I mean, last week we were all just like, God, Britt is so annoying and she's so awful. And that has not changed. That has completely not changed whatsoever.
Starting point is 00:05:00 But it's sad seeing this as Kenya's final episode because, um, you know, she, Kenya's so good at destroying people and this was, this was just such an, well, it was first of all, terrible. It really was terrible. And like, I was imagining like, if, if, if we had actually been there and seen this, that's like, it's actually like deeply humiliating. And there's not, and it's, and it's like, wow, you put up a picture of her sucking a dick, like as if you haven't sucked a dick, she just has it. There's just a picture of her and every, I don't know. I just was like, it was really cruel.
Starting point is 00:05:37 It was, it went from shady and being like villainous to just like cruelty, um, in a way that, that was really unfortunate. And I just feel like Kenya is so much better than that. She doesn't have to resort to a stunt. Is she? Well, better at like being evil to someone, you know? And like knowing how to do it where she makes great TV. And this was just her being really actually
Starting point is 00:06:00 like a deplorable human. Yeah, and bringing her daughter up the whole time. Like she's trying to take food out of my daughter's mouth. I was like, really, you're gonna bring up your daughter while you're sewing like blow job pictures to your crowd at the business that's supposed to take care of your daughter. I mean, we'll get there as the episode goes along, but damn, not looking good, can ya?
Starting point is 00:06:22 Okay, so we open this episode, season 16 episode a few about last night over at Shamia's house. And Angela, Angela who also has a, like let's not understate Angela's crazy ass storyline either this episode, like what the fuck? This episode is crazy. This whole episode is nuts. So we open with Angela coming over to Shemeah's house
Starting point is 00:06:47 and Shemeah's like, you know, I'm so glad you came Angela. I just wanted to really apologize for making fun of your physical appearance. And Angela's like, yeah, you too, you too. Let's not forget that I also made fun of your physical appearance, okay, Flava? Yeah. So I got you too, so.
Starting point is 00:07:05 Shemeah's like, you know, the bank event with Angela, you know, it started out, I mean, phenomenal. And you know, I fit in my olive branch and she accepted and it was like, we're off the races until we weren't. And one of the horses got tranquilized. And then, which I think is a reference to Britain and Kenya's fight erupting. So then Brittany shows up, Britt shows up at Shamiah's and, and Shamiah is just saying how like she thought initially Britt was playing and then she was, Oh wait, no, Britt is actually really mad right now at Kenya. And so now basically she's invited Britt over cause she wants to get the bottom of it. And like what was going on for it that night?
Starting point is 00:07:40 Because Shamiah don't forget is the glue of this group. She is the self-proclaimed, speaking of horses, she is the self-proclaimed glue of the group. So, she's going to make everything okay. So, the girls come over and Brett immediately is like, oh my God, you guys, I just had to fall last night. I mean, I do not know what is wrong with me. Let's all sit on the floor. That is how uncomfortable that couch is, Okay. Assuming you have so much money. I know that couch is gorgeous, but get a couch people can sit on because that shit will roll right off of they would rather sit on the floor to eat your chips
Starting point is 00:08:14 than sit on that couch. They both were down there on the floor. And yeah, Brits like, Yeah, I haven't even really gone to sleep yet. And just like neither of I and they're like, wait, wait, why didn't you go to sleep, Angela? She's like, well, you know, I just had all that backlash and like, but what backlash did you get? She was like, well, the owners of the venue, I guess the owners
Starting point is 00:08:36 were really mad that the this like fake bank experience was was sullied on TV. I'm like, you should not be mad. You should be so happy. This is actually immortalized your stupid venue in the experience was was sullied on TV. I'm like, you should not be mad. You should be so happy. This is actually immortalized your stupid venue in the bravo lore. You should actually be paying the cast to make your bank that memorable. Give me a fucking break. Okay, bank. Get over a bank. Also, I'm sick of your fees.
Starting point is 00:08:58 Yeah. And general banks. Your hours. Bastards. My overdraft fees, fuck off with that. So Angela's like, oh yeah, the bank is so mad at me. And so Brits just saying, oh, I need to apologize. Who am I gonna apologize to? And she means like, well, okay, look,
Starting point is 00:09:18 I know Kenya cut you off and that wasn't great. And she goes, yeah, I hate that. You know, it's the same thing that happened to my nose. So with Kenya at that table, you know, I had the paper and I talked and she cut me off the entire time. Britt, you were acting like an idiot and nobody did anything to you.
Starting point is 00:09:33 And Kenya never did anything to you. Like in the whole history of the show, watching what Kenya has done, what she did to you was nothing. She wasn't even being mean to you about your wedding ring. She was trying to figure out what the fuck you were talking about with your wedding ring. Like all of us were, ma'am. Yeah. And really the best that the
Starting point is 00:09:48 producers could do to come up with evidence of Kenya cutting her off was not really even a cutoff. It sounded like Brit came to a period and Kenya responded and was like, okay, you want to have a moment. But it was not like a blatant talking over and like, I'm going to shut you down or whatever. And it was just like, like you said, Kenya has done so much worse. And the fact that you are so like upset by this, her response to you being bratty is ridiculous. Yeah. So Brits like, well, we're talking about me. And, you know, okay. And I get that it would be sensitive because Kenya called her a peasant and her husband won't buy her, you know, marble countertops, which is difficult to hear. So, I mean, I get that, but she's too much. She's trying too hard. So,
Starting point is 00:10:35 Kenya only called her a peasant after Britt kept on yapping away at her. And finally, Kenya's like, cause Kenya was like, okay, you want to have a moment, you can have a moment. You're having your moment. She's like, I'm not having a moment whatsoever. Even though it was like blatantly a moment. And then finally Kenya's like, you know what? You know, queens don't talk to peasants. And like, it wasn't like she just pulled that out of nowhere. It was built up to it.
Starting point is 00:10:58 Yeah, it's not like she knew that your husband wouldn't buy you nice finishes. Yeah, she had no idea. She didn't know. She thought you were perfectly she had no idea. She didn't know. She thought you had perfectly nice countertops. She didn't know. Oh, also speaking of apologies, I know this show's not airing right now,
Starting point is 00:11:11 but I wish that they could bring on Ashley to apologize to Roberta Flack. Did you see that whole thing? I saw that she sang, Killing Me Softly on the local news. Oh no. So Ashley. Oh no. So Ashley. This is not good.
Starting point is 00:11:25 Oh no. So Ashley's like, I'd like to dedicate this to Roberta Fleck. Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me,, we gong it, please no. It was bad. I have to say, I doff my cap to whoever had the idea to have Ashley on their local news because they knew it was gonna be a disaster and they knew the clip would go around and get exposure for the news team. So well done, your ploy worked.
Starting point is 00:11:59 Yeah, hey, that's how to take it, Bank. Look at Fox Five News, okay? That's how to take bad news. Fox Five's like, yes, ratings. So then Ashley went to like some jazz bar because now she has like a jazz band, I guess. I'm not really sure what she's doing. So she was at some jazz bar.
Starting point is 00:12:13 This is what happens when you put Ashley in a hotel with Luanne is that she comes out with these ideas that she can also start to sing. Yeah, the birds flock together, you know? These ones flock to the tune of very off-key songs. So Ashley went to this jazz band and she's like, well, you know, guys, I mean, I'm not gonna blame anybody for that.
Starting point is 00:12:33 I'm not gonna blame anybody, you know, except the musicians and them all and you know, Fox Five, but you know, it wasn't me. And to prove that I can sing this song, I'm gonna do it now, boys. And they, you know And they're great musicians. They all start playing and saying, giving me the only way.
Starting point is 00:12:49 I was like, oh no, no. Why are you doing it again? Why don't you just bring Roberta Flack up and just start kicking her over and over again? Leave her alone. Let her rest. Ashley, for fuck's sake, man. It's called killing us softly with the song,
Starting point is 00:13:06 not killing us intensely and repeatedly with your song, which is what you're literally doing. Let's make it soft, so soft we can't even hear it. Yeah, don't kill me with the migraine girl. So she, yeah, that was rough. So she owes everybody an apology. Okay, so back to this show. Wait, no, we're not, we can't go back to the show.
Starting point is 00:13:25 I'm sorry. And the reason why is because I made the mistake of invoking Countess Luan-Duliseps. And we have a week until the next crappy hour. So it's probably gonna get forgotten, but Countess Luan-Duliseps has made her acting debut on the Murdoch Mysteries, where she's playing some sort of like, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:13:43 She's, it's on her social media everywhere. She's like in a fur and a little hat. It's like a period piece. And there was a clip up. Did you see the clip of her in this show? No, she's like, hello, I am Schmountess Mouin, blah, blah, blah. And it's pleasure to meet you detective. It is so hilariously bad. It's like, there's just nothing she can't do. Who got killed? Bum ba da bum ba bum bum ba dum.
Starting point is 00:14:09 She's playing the bongos. Dum dum dum dum. I'm gonna solve this mystery with bongo playing. Hit it boys. Hit it boys, you're about to hear a real deal mystery. Here's a clip of her. Let me hear it. Is it playing? I don me hear it. Is it playing?
Starting point is 00:14:27 I don't hear it. Ben, I don't hear it. He can't see me. He's listening to this clip. Oh, you guys didn't hear it? Nope. You guys that's so sad. Fail, clip fail.
Starting point is 00:14:43 Okay. But also why, also while you figure that out, this is not the Countess' acting debut. How dare you? Have you forgotten about Law and Order? I know, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I really failed, a dual fail. I discredited her IMDB and you guys didn't hear
Starting point is 00:14:57 this amazing clip where she goes, nice to meet you. Yeah. Very sad. feels this way. Brit told me I didn't like the way Kenya made me feel. And she's like, but it's not just my feeling, you know, like the energy is off with Kenya with me, you know. So then we see Angela and Brit hiking and Brit saying all this stuff. And she's saying, you know, I just felt provoked. And I don't want anybody to think I was trying to intimidate Kenya, you know, because I would never in any form shape anything, would want her to feel that I would want her to harm
Starting point is 00:15:51 her, period. I have no problem telling her that. I'm going to apologize. So Bre has obviously been pulled over by producers and we're like, yeah, you can't threaten people with guns. Make it right or you're out. And so she, you know, she is gonna now have to apologize. Yes, and so she does the mature thing,
Starting point is 00:16:09 which is reach out to Kenya and say, can we have a one-on-one time to clear it up? Because I feel really bad about what happened. Just kidding, she never does that. She brings flowers to a party. So Britt's like, you know, I do have two older sisters and we get into it, you know, and sharing stuff. And I just like their family and I love them
Starting point is 00:16:26 and like we can be fiery, but then like we love each other. So because of you guys, I'm like gonna make a very conscious effort to take it back a notch. I'm gonna be better. Yeah, it definitely spoke of, she got a slap on the wrist from Bravo and now she has marching orders to be better. And Angela's like, well, you know us, families, family,
Starting point is 00:16:47 and family's the most important thing. Yeah, family's the most important thing. Yeah, family, family, right. You both hate your families. So could we stop having little side scenes where you talk about how important family is? You both hate your families, okay? I forgot the H's.
Starting point is 00:17:01 Sounded like I said you hate your family, but you hate your family, so stop. So now Angela's like, well, but what about Portia saying that she's heard some tea about Charles? Dun, dun, dun. So she's like, well, let's make it clear. I'm married to celebrity. So you know, people are going to say things about Charles. It's just how it is. My DMs are flooded. So it's not like I'm going to rock that boat. You know, I mean, what are you, who hasn't slept with Charles? Am I right? And Britt's like, well, somebody might get slapped if somebody talks about my husband
Starting point is 00:17:33 that way. If he did something like that. I guarantee you, no one is going to talk about your husband the way they would talk about Charles Oakley. And Sheme is like, what do you, yeah, yeah, no one's going to brag about sleeping with your husband. Yeah. The guy who acts like he has a toothpick in his mouth at all times. Yeah, I just don't think that's gonna happen anytime soon, okay?
Starting point is 00:17:51 Yeah, I agree. And Sheme is like, you're supposed to be apologizing for threatening violence, not threatening more violence. And so they all laugh. Think, oh my God, britches can't help threatening violence. It's hilarious. So Portia shows up at Kenya's hair spa and Kenya's like security let you in. And then they're just talking about like Porsche's wearing yellow.
Starting point is 00:18:15 She's like, I practice sunshine, honey. And then I was about it's been a crazy day. And can just like it's been a crazy couple of days. You know, I just want to zhizh up the grand opening. I'm just like, you know, I just want to see a couple of girls, you know, that want to be part of it. I want to model because this could be her big moment where she's going to be able to promote her hair spa.
Starting point is 00:18:34 And what better way to promote it than by showing a guest having a, giving a blow job on poster board. So Portia's like, okay, you know, I can still judge the real edges even though, you know, I do go naked, but still I know a good edge or two. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappence commercial. Have you ever wondered how a circus performer could become the most powerful woman in the Byzantine Empire? Even the Royals is a podcast from Wondery that pulls back the curtain on royal families,
Starting point is 00:19:09 from ancient empires to modern monarchs, to show you the darker side of what it means to be royalty. Before she ruled an empire, Theodora was a teen sensation in circus shows, featuring dancing bears, burlesque performers, and blood-soaked chariot races. But when her star came crashing down, she clawed her way from rock bottom to the very top, using everything from comedy to espionage to get there. Empress Theodora didn't just survive. She revolutionized women's rights across the Byzantine Empire,
Starting point is 00:19:36 like changing laws to let women divorce men, own property, and bring abusive men to justice. For all her work in pioneering, she's remembered as the most powerful Byzantine Empress in history. Follow Even the Royals on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Even the Royals early and ad free by joining Wondery Plus. So then we get the thing that we get every season.
Starting point is 00:20:00 Where Portia's like, you know, Kenny and I have had our ups and downs, but I'm just so happy where we are. Okay. I heard that before. So now Kelly arrives too and she's still too much because she still needs it. So she's like, Oh my God, everyone. Hi.
Starting point is 00:20:16 Oh, so good to be here. It's a business owner. So good to be here. Business is girl. Am I right? Hey, do you do wobbles there? I have wobbles. Oh, good to be here. Businesses girl. Am I right? Hey, do you do waffles there? I have waffles.
Starting point is 00:20:34 I left my security guard outside this time. It's really just a stack of waffles, but it's a very intimidating stack. They are covered in syrup. So if anybody tries anything with me, they're going gonna be moving slowly yeah they will be caught in the log cabin I literally put a log cabin out there so um so they're just like laughing about these all these security guards and Kelly's like you know I hate what happened with her and Brit but I like Kenya so we are here to support and make sure that she gets what it is that she needs
Starting point is 00:21:07 in regard to her grand opening. And I'm hoping that what she needs is waffles because that's really all I can offer. People want waffles at hair openings, right? Yeah, so now they're going to, you know, she's saying, oh, you're such a good hostess, Kenya. And Kenya's like, oh, I haven't always been told that. Hey, hey, hey.
Starting point is 00:21:24 And then we see a flashback to 2021 when Marlo's come and get her for not providing food for her guests. Dun, dun, dun. Which was true. That was some bad hosting. And then ordering herself some DoorDash. Yeah, that was really bad.
Starting point is 00:21:38 That was actually the worst thing I think that Kenya ever did. That was one of Kenya's worst seasons. And then slut shamed everybody about Bolo later, you know? Yeah, that was when Kenya was really doing her, was that her victory lap season where she was like, I'm married, huh? Well, she was definitely, that's,
Starting point is 00:21:54 I mean, the moment she married Mark is when she definitely became very prim and proper, and that was a decline of Kenya, but that was definitely a low point that season for her. Yeah, so they do a model walk off and they're like, Twirl, give us twirl, can you more hair spa? So they're auditioning models. I'm not really sure because I don't think any of the models
Starting point is 00:22:16 actually get their hair done at this place. They just put on a bunch of wigs and then, am I reading that wrong from the show? I think you're correct. I think that they just like any chance to do model auditions on this show and just in general on Bravo. If they can do that, it'll be, you know,
Starting point is 00:22:34 they will work in a model audition. So that's what they're doing. Cause it's an excuse for people to sit around and pass judgment about normies. And so they do that. So they're all modeling. Yeah, but you're right. Cause they are gonna wind up putting on these
Starting point is 00:22:47 like fantastic wigs and it has nothing to do with their, I guess they just have to, and they all have to walk slowly cause they're wigs. So like whatever like runway walking they're gonna do now, they're not really gonna be able to do in their wig. So. Yeah. And it was a good drag show.
Starting point is 00:23:02 I mean, they did do like a good kind of drag show, but I don't know. I think those girls do their own wigs, drag queens, right? Isn't that part of their thing? Well, I don't think they were drag queens, but it was definitely. No, I just mean like it was that kind of show. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:23:15 Like it was like a very drag inspired show. Yeah. Of course, drag is inspired by women in the first place. So I don't know which came first, the chicken or the horse. Were those wig shows, I don't know which came first, the chicken or the horse? With those wig shows, I don't know if it's like one person doing the wig or if it's like multiple people
Starting point is 00:23:31 that are doing like a wig competition. That's a bald eye just like, it's so weird to me, you know? I'm like, wow, look at all of you celebrating your dead skin cells hanging out all over your head. Congratulations. As someone who often walks around his kitchen with a bottle of alcohol on his head, I have to say that watching this fashion show, I was like, well, I didn't know I could use
Starting point is 00:23:55 hair to brace that. It would have been much easier. So they're asking her if she invited Britt to her thing. She's like, well, I didn't specifically invite her. And they're like, but you didn't uninvite her. And she says, no. And so they're like, so what even happened the other day? And Kenya says, well, you know, we're talking about my big vagina. I thought it was so fun.
Starting point is 00:24:17 And then it all went bad. And so they're like, yeah, you know, and Portia's sticking up for Kenya. She's like, yeah, you know, it took a left turn. Kenya had disengaged. Okay, that's nothing for Kenya. And then when she says that she has a pistol, you know, no, we have to find out exactly what was said.
Starting point is 00:24:38 And Kenya's like, well, I know what I heard. And Kelly didn't hear it. And Kenya, look, the girl did say she had a pistol and she had a chain. I'm not going to stick up for that because she never should have said that. She did not say I have a pistol and I'm going to kill that bitch or anything like that. But I think even saying like in anger, you know, I have a pistol. Okay. But how overreacting are we going to get, you know, I think I'm walking it back a little just because I've seen the end of this episode. So I'm like, I mean, look, my reaction, I feel like I'm of the two minds, which is,
Starting point is 00:25:11 and I said this last week, like, technically she didn't say I'm, she wasn't like, I have a pistol on me and I'm going to use it. You better watch out because I've got a pistol. So she totally didn't do that. But she did say, I've got whips and pistols. Like why is she don't come for me? I've got whips and pistols. Like why is she don't come for me? I've got whips and pistols. So there is a very strong implication which is very unsettling. And I think that basically Britt is an idiot for saying that and trashy and it's wrong to do that.
Starting point is 00:25:37 Kenya is definitely though doing the Kenya thing where she is now like, oh, I'm going to take that and I am going to like I found a weakness and I'm going to exploit that. Well, I guess with the evidence presented of Kenya also doing this with season six. Now granted, that was a long time ago. This is season 16. So that was 10 seasons ago. Things were different then, you know, back when we could threaten people with guns. God, don't you miss those days?
Starting point is 00:26:03 Yeah. Oh, the fun days. Well, I live in Texas, so I still you miss those days? Yeah, all the fun days. Well, I live in Texas, so I still live in those days, I guess, you know. Solicitors? How about soliciting a bullet, motherfucker? So Kenya's like, I'm not gonna play right now. What I'm not gonna do is bullshit.
Starting point is 00:26:20 The lies and the gaslighting, all that stuff, I have too much to lose, which is why I plan to lose it all by the end of the gaslighting, all that stuff. I have too much to lose, which is why I plan to lose it all by the end of the episode. Yeah, so she's like, that was just such a level of disrespect, you know, the level of angst and aggressive nature of how she was speaking, which I mean, I agree with that part. So Kelly's like, but she's not that person, guys.
Starting point is 00:26:43 She's not that person. Well, she is, she's that person, guys. She's not that person. Well, she is. She's that person because that was her. So unless you're saying she was on some kind of pills or something, she was that person. So don't say she's not that person. Just say, let's help her be a better person, guys. This is Housewives. Let's lift each other up. Yeah. And Kenya's like, well, you can't just tell me who she is. Like, I have to see it, you know? And she can show me from afar. And Kelly's like, no, what I was saying is, I've just never seen her act in that manner.
Starting point is 00:27:09 That's just not who she, I've just never seen that. I think you guys should talk. Now, to be fair, every time I have hung out with Britt, I've been mainly focused on the waffle I've brought with me as well. So maybe I've been distracted and just didn't see that side of her. Well, and also you did see it.
Starting point is 00:27:23 You did see her act like that that night when everybody else saw it. And everybody saw it on the TV as well. So don't say you haven't seen it. How about you just meet her also? Are these actual friends from pre-show or I feel like they just met like three episodes ago. Yeah, but they're noobs so they're trying to stick together. So then, Porsche is like, well, maybe Kenya should do her due diligence and speak to other people who were there
Starting point is 00:27:46 and see. And I guess Porsche is trying to see like, did, did Ken, which Kenya really threatened with a gun because Porsche, I guess, didn't hear this. So she's just heard it from Kenya. So I love that she's saying right in front of Kenya, like, ah, should we get some proof of what this girl even said? And Kenny is like, oh, I'll do my due diligence. I'm running a background check. Dun dun dun.
Starting point is 00:28:07 Yeah, dun dun dun. And then, yeah, Portia's basically like, yeah, you may need to uninvite. And Kenny's like, I'm twerking on my haters. One last twirl for old times sake. So now we go to a scene that's pretty wacky, which is it's Angela and her daughter Amari. I tried to see if I could do Angela's voice
Starting point is 00:28:33 and I sat there and I was talking back to my TV. I cannot get Angela's bubble, her throat bubble, right? And it makes me very upset. And part of me is like, am I just gonna talk like Countess of the Land when I do her? Cause I was like, hello Am upset. And part of me is like, am I just going to talk like Countess the Whale when I do her? Because I was like, I was like, hello, Maury. And I just sounded ridiculous. And she's going to be my, she's going to be my whale, I think, because I don't think I like she's one of
Starting point is 00:28:53 those voices that I, I can't, I can't get right at all. Not that I get anyone's voice right. But I can't even approach with her. Yeah, I was gonna say, I don't really try to get anything right. I have a lot of accuracy. This is not a show people come to for me to get things right. It's not a hell I even want to climb, let alone die. Or so than usual. I was sitting there going like this. It just was my funny because I was the boy the sounds coming out of my mouth. I was like, I'm like, no, that's not her at all.
Starting point is 00:29:21 Have a kind of a, you know, my daughter, Amari, you know, my oldest, I can't really do it either. So, she talks about how Amari lost her father to murder in Chicago when she was just a little kid, seven years old. And so, she's been a single mom for a long time. So, they've just become best friends, as we'll see in this very scene. So Amar is like really into coffee. So she's gonna have her own coffee shop and her mom doesn't understand the difference between coffees. She's like, just make it out of a Keurig.
Starting point is 00:29:54 And Amar is like, mother. So they're having one of those. Peruvian coffee. Yeah, she's like, mom, Peruvian coffee is the best coffee. She's like, I don't know. I can't even go close to the coffee machine because Charles is always in the kitchen, cooking food for 40 people that aren't at our house. Your father calls the Keurig fingerprint magnet that I'm not
Starting point is 00:30:17 allowed to use. So I wouldn't really know. He hates it so much. He calls it mom. So basically, Angela is saying that she can't tell the difference between Peruvian coffee and other coffees. And Amar is like, Okay, well, blink twice, forget about the coffee. Okay, I really want to get to the nitty gritty of it all and understand why isn't grandma here? She was supposed to meet us. And I thought we were gonna have like a little moment where we can really put our matters to the table
Starting point is 00:30:46 and I could shame you in front of grandma for not understanding what Peruvian coffee is. And so Angela's like, well, you know, I got a call from your grandma saying you need to talk to your daughter. So what happened? And she goes, what happened? Okay, now listen to this story.
Starting point is 00:31:01 So I went to grandma to use the car that you provided for her thinking it would be no problem. Excuse me, you showed up at your grandma's house and said, I'm taking your car. My mom bought this car anyway. No. Speaking in your grandmother's defense already, just from your first line, your mother buying that car for your grandmother does not make that your car, ma'am. You still need to ask permission to use somebody's car. So already I'm not on her side. I will grant you that. In fact, I'm saying that as if I'm not going to grant you something in the future. I think I'm granting all your points that you'll be giving in this scene. I'm going to say,
Starting point is 00:31:37 yes, I co-sign. I also, by the way, that being said, I love the shadows of Monica Garcia in this fight to come talking about that, that land Rover that became like the emblem of like, what her relationship with her mother was is where the land Rover would be. Yeah. When Monica's mom was like, okay, you want to call me a bad mother and shame me on TV, then you don't get the car I pay for. Bye. Yeah. So, Amari, like, even, by the way, even if the car was not even given to grandma, even if Angela had just bought the car, it's still not Amari's car to take.
Starting point is 00:32:17 Yeah, it's still not her car. Because it's not Amari's car. So she went over, said she wants the car, the grandma said no, and then she says, but then they wanted money from me. And your sister got in my face and called me a demon. And she told everybody in the house, fuck them. All because I wanted to use a car that wasn't hers.
Starting point is 00:32:33 It wasn't even my sister's. It wasn't even yours either, ma'am. So she's like, well, you know how much I helped them and you helped them too. And so Angela gets all teary eyed and she's like, nobody told me that. You should have told me that. You never told me anyone got in your face. None of this makes sense to me. I have to say, I don't understand someone
Starting point is 00:32:54 getting in your face. I don't understand. Did you ask nicely for the car? Did you just show up and demand the car? What happened? Did you take their money to start a Peruvian coffee company? Is that the real story here? I was gonna sell that car to invest start a Peruvian coffee company? Is that the real story here? I was going to sell that car to invest in some Peruvian beans.
Starting point is 00:33:09 So Amari is like, I just never expected that from her because I literally helped them with their bills. I helped them with whatever they need and I'm there for every peck and call. I'm there and so are you. So are you. So then Angela explains that Amari lives in a house that Angela bought? So Angela bought a house for her mother and her sister and Amari would live there, too She goes well It's always the goal of a child to purchase a home for you know their parent And I was just happy to do that and just it blew up and things went left and Amari moved out so
Starting point is 00:33:41 I'm already confused why there's a house that has like the grandma, the aunt and the granddaughter in it. And like, why isn't there like an apartment for Amari, by the way, why is Amari in the house? Just as long as you're buying places, get her, get her or have Amari just pay for her own damn apartment. Why isn't Amari living with the mom? Why is she living with the grandma? Why is she not living with, I don't understand that. Does she not like Charles? Does Charles, I mean, Charles did not seem to really enjoy Amari because remember he was like, uh, he was like, what was it that he was cracking down
Starting point is 00:34:13 on her about something about like the corn? He was making corn, cleaning the kitchen. He was cleaning the kitchen and he said, why didn't you clean the kitchen last night? She's like, I did. And he's like, no, you didn't. She's like, yeah, I did. Well, sorry if it wasn't clean enough for you. So yeah, it's- To be fair, he has very rigid standards about that kitchen because he's seen later on, bark at Angela about not washing her hands and she washed her hands 11 seconds earlier. Yes. It's like, it's been 11 seconds. So then there, that answers the question why she wasn't living with them. It's probably making her crazy and she's like, I can't buy everyone a house. So for now, go live with your grandma.
Starting point is 00:34:49 And then that turned into a big fight. And so she ended up moving out. So Angela's like, the fact that my mother didn't defend you breaks my heart. It just breaks my heart. And she's like, and they didn't even tell you the full story. It just sucks. I can't believe someone would withhold valuable information from you, my sweet mother.
Starting point is 00:35:09 Could you imagine? Something important happens and they don't even tell you, mother. After you've done so much for all of us in this family, how could anyone hold anything from you? You shouldn't be supporting her. You shouldn't support any of them. So then she's like,
Starting point is 00:35:28 but you got married. And just like, look, it's my mom, my mom needs me. It turns out her mom has bipolar disorder. And so she's always going to take care of her. And then she tells the story about how her mom, And then she tells the story about how her mom, she was eight when her mom was diagnosed, but now her mom is self-proclaimed healed, which I thought she was gonna say, so now there's more drama than ever. Ben said, she goes, but I applaud that
Starting point is 00:35:55 because she was using it as a crutch before. I was like, I don't know if you're allowed to self-diagnose heal from bipolar disorder. Maybe that might be something you might want to circle back to, you know? Yeah, I'm not sure how all that works. It might be healthy to check in on that. So then she's like, well, you know, my, I'm already saying that her grandma was always
Starting point is 00:36:15 a good grandma and she's a good woman and I love her, but in this situation she's wrong. So she's like, okay, well, you know, I want to protect you, but you know, and she goes, yeah, I'm 24. And she goes, but then you snuck off and got married. And she's like, well, so, and then we find out that Anari, what is wrong with me? I'm reading things wrong. My dyslexia is coming. My self-imposed dyslexia is coming. Wow. After you had just announced yourself cured. I'm like, am I cured from bipolar disorder? I'm like trying to like think what I've cured myself. So she's- I will say this. One thing I've been trying to cure myself of that I've not been able to all my life, waffles.
Starting point is 00:36:52 It's hard. It's going to be hard this season, that's for sure, because they're talked about a lot. So basically Angela's like, yeah, and then I find out that Amari got a lot of waffles and I'm like, I'm not sure I'm going to be able to cure myself. I'm like, I'm not sure I's going to be hard this season, that's for sure, because they're talked about a lot. So basically Angela's like, yeah, and then I find out that Amari got married and that just rocked me to my core, me and my best friend. So she's like, why wouldn't you tell me, baby? Why?
Starting point is 00:37:17 Why? And she goes, tell you what, she goes, that you got married. And she goes, I just did. She goes, right now when I'm asking you? She's like, yeah. And she goes, I just did. She goes, right now when I'm asking you? She's like, yeah. Yeah, Amari is like very like whatever mother and Angela's saying how it was like really hurtful. She's like, she's my best friend.
Starting point is 00:37:33 And for her to not want to know me, for me to not want to not want me to know is just like really hard. And so Amari said, well, how did you find out? How did you find out? Because you never told me. She goes, well, I found out through your grandmother. So basically, the grandma threw Amari under the bus. Well, you wouldn't be under the bus. You should be on the bus instead of trying to steal your grandma's car. And what do you think is going to happen when you're fighting with your grandma and getting in her and her daughter's face. Like, what do you think? They don't owe you anything
Starting point is 00:38:08 if you're gonna be acting like that. Why am I mad at Amari? I don't even know these people, but here's why I'm mad at Amari. You don't tell your mom that you got married and then you're showing up at someone's house trying to get their car and you didn't clean the kitchen. The evidence is starting to add up.
Starting point is 00:38:23 It has started, when you say it that way, the evidence is adding up. And honestly, like, you're asking your grandma to hold a secret for you, but then you're also gonna sass your grandma. That's dangerous. Yeah, you should know better. We've seen a lot of soap opera. No sass, no gas. No sass, no gas. We saw Madeline still on revenge. And if you want to come for her, guess what she's going to do? She will sit in that chair with the writing on it and she will destroy you. With one wonky eye, she'll do it.
Starting point is 00:38:52 One eye twitching like this, one eye open, she'll do it. If you've got stuff that you're hiding, don't fight with the person who's hiding it for you because it's always going to backfire. Always. So she's like, I didn't even find out until you were four months married. it for you because it's always gonna backfire. Always. So she's like, I didn't even find out till you were four months married. And she's like, well, I was planning on telling you. And she goes, when?
Starting point is 00:39:11 And she's like, when I needed you to sign a car lease for us. She's like, damn you. And she's like, you know, for you to act like that, I shouldn't be hurt. Like for you to act like that, I should get over it. And she's like, well, I'm not saying you shouldn't be hurt. You just have to not be so stupid about it. God, you're annoying.
Starting point is 00:39:29 And she's like, this is just like, that's how you're acting in this moment. Like, right, do I get over it? And Marce, everyone's making it a much bigger deal than I am, like nothing's changed. Like, well, if it's not that big of a deal, how do you not tell your mom, by the way, I got married. There's someone else in the family.
Starting point is 00:39:47 And then Amari loses even more with me. Because then she starts crying and she's like, it's a gang up on Amari day. Oh, now you're going to cry and say, we're all ganging up on you? Ma'am, you got married and didn't tell your mom. Okay, and also who'd you get married to? Is this someone that your mom doesn't like?
Starting point is 00:40:07 Is it a man, is it a woman? Is there controversy? Why were you hiding it? I'm like, I need more than just, I got married in secret and tried to steal my grandma's car. Like, I need details. Yeah, yeah. I think this is not gonna be the last time we hear
Starting point is 00:40:22 of Amari getting up to some stuff. I think we're gonna find out that she like, it's gonna be stupid stuff. It's gonna be like she said she took the garbage out, but she actually only brought it to the garage. And so then it was in the garage and no one realized and then they got rats. It's gonna be something like that and be like, Amari, why? She's like, well, I was gonna tell you that the garbage was in the garage. Because you know Charles has Ring Cam footage of everything. I'm hoping Charles has some big exposé. He's like, oh, really? She cleaned the kitchen? Let me show you her cleaning the kitchen. She was eating my
Starting point is 00:40:54 Brussels sprouts in the middle of the kitchen with no paper towel. She tries the crying thing, and it works. Angela starts crying too. They're like, oh, I promised to love you. No, but I promised to love you too. Then I'm just left with questions. The crying too. And they're like, oh, I promised to love you. No, but I promised to love you too. And then I'm just left with questions. The scene's over and I'm like, what the hell just happened? I just think there's a lot of dysfunctional family stuff happening with these new people. And I'm all about it. I love it.
Starting point is 00:41:18 Because honestly, the cast members that come on with functional family is incredibly boring. Like, let's not act like we all are so thrilled when Shamia gets together with her family. And she's like, my sister has always been there for me. Like if it weren't for my sister, she, she, she takes care of the kids. When I had to go to lunch, she takes care of the kids. When I went to see a movie and then you see the sister being like, I took care of the kids because we're a family. And then look, here's my mom and mom has it down.
Starting point is 00:41:45 Mom just made some fast forwarding made a cheese plate. It's like, who cares? Yeah. Tell me, tell me that mom got into a fight with the sister because of someone tried to take the car. That's what you know. Yeah, that's what I need to know. Yeah, I agree. I don't think that they should not be fucked up. I'm just filled with questions, mystery, which is good. I don't think that they should not be fucked up. I'm just filled with questions mystery, which is good I don't need to dwell. I don't need to dwell on the families that seem to actually have healthy relationships, right?
Starting point is 00:42:20 Okay, so then we go to lunchtime with Portia and Britt Okay, so then we go to lunchtime with Portia and Brit. So now they're talking about all the Kenya stuff and Brit does her haunt. I just took it too far. There's no excuse for my actions. So I can only breathe out of my mouth and sometimes that makes my brain feel a little bit dizzy, but still it's no excuse.
Starting point is 00:42:44 Thank you to whichever intern had to write the bullet points for Brit to repeat over and over again this episode. They had it on like a little card. She's really laying it on. So Portia's like, yeah, well, it was a shock to me that you had a beef with her because like when I met you guys, like you guys were all just like sitting together at Shemeah's house. She's exactly. And there's no excuse. I thought we were cool. And I felt like, you know, when she's around the group, she wants to kind of like put it on a little bit. So I think that's the tone and it's turned off like, hi, you know, oh, where's your wedding man? But hashtag, there's no excuse.
Starting point is 00:43:20 I thought she was making like light fun conversation with you because you're confusing as fuck. You're like, well, this is my ring, but it's not my wedding ring. It's my anniversary ring. So she said, so where's your other ring? And you're like, what do you mean my other ring? She's like, well, where's your other ring? If it was the seat, she's, is it another man that you're talking about? She's like, no, I'm talking about this man, honey, this ring.
Starting point is 00:43:39 And she was, oh, okay. So it's like a year anniversary from getting another ring. What is so horrible about that? I didn't get it. So she's still like, well, she was just coming for me. And no, you just needed to try and go after the big dog. And you failed. Okay.
Starting point is 00:43:54 Kenya was coming lightly, but it was light. It was, she was shady, being shaded, but that in many ways that is actually Kenya's love language. She's saying, I'm inviting you to have a storyline with me. And, um, Britt should have been like Britt, like someone who's more self-possessed or someone who is good at this would be like, Oh, she wants, she wants to be shaded with me. I will shade her right back. But instead she's like, I can't believe she would say that. I can't believe she would do that. And she's coming after me. And why, why can't you speak to Britt politely, you
Starting point is 00:44:23 know, when you're in a group setting? So she gets all flustered, which means that Kenya got 100% right under her skin and she should have just been able to shade Kenya right back. Yeah, she should have just been like, oh yeah, show me your ring. I wanna see your ring. Exactly. I hear it's really pretty.
Starting point is 00:44:37 It's just right there. Not like, I was at a man, let me call my husband, let me call my husband. You say, oh, where's your ring? Yeah, where's your ring? Oh, that's too bad. Oh, I'm sorry, did your husband take it back and cast it in to try and pay all that rent that he's back on since his place is getting he's getting evicted out of his place. How's that going? That must be so hard on you.
Starting point is 00:44:56 That's all. That's all you have to do. So anyway, Portia is like, yeah, well, everybody who witnessed the exchange was like, it was, Kenny was like being pretty chill. Britt's like, well, she was being dismissive and she was being nasty and I feel like she was just targeting me. I'm like, lady, you're on the Real Housewives of Atlanta. I don't know what you expect. And I don't know if you think it's gonna get any better,
Starting point is 00:45:19 but this is what you signed up for. This girl hates being dismissed. That's probably why she was out doing music videos all the time instead of going to high school. She just got sick of hearing people say, you're dismissed. I put a premium. I'm not being dismissed. That's her retro tagline. So, Portia's like, you know, there's all these preconceived notions of Kenya because she's Kenya and she can be a monster. And then we see clips of Portia and Kenya getting into it over the years.
Starting point is 00:45:53 And now we're back to present. And Portia's like, yeah, you know, she was ready to go toe to toe with Kenya, but she didn't realize she was meeting a different Kenya who doesn't give a damn at this moment. So Portia's like, you know, the back and forth wasn't that big an issue at the table. I don't get it. But then you said something about a pistol, like when we were heading to take her home, you know, and we were like, are you sure she said that? And she said she heard it with her own ears.
Starting point is 00:46:19 And Britt's like, okay, so let me tell you what happened. She's like, yeah, yeah, tell me.. She's like, yeah, tell me. And she's like, well, okay, so she was afraid. Okay, I was triggered by everything she was going, that was going on at that moment that I started. Okay, no pun intended, no pun intended. Like maybe now's not the best time to be pulling out triggered as a defense.
Starting point is 00:46:37 I was like, I was like, I don't want, like I was gonna take my shot and you know, things just popped off. I felt targeted. I just wanted to put a cap on the evening, you know. Hold on, I have a few bullet points to go over. She wanted to talk and I said, go ahead, shoot. Sorry, I have a lot of ammo here that I really want to get through. So I was rifling through my purse and I saw.
Starting point is 00:47:12 Could you pass the cheese? I love it when it's warm and melting and oozy. Before I could even talk to her she gunned those engines. Wow. So. My mental, inside my brain I'm like, what, guns are left? I've got it. Oh my God, look at that baby colt running on the street.
Starting point is 00:47:34 So I went home and watched Beretta. So Brittany's like, yeah, you know, she was afraid and I was just triggered, you know? And she literally does go, I was triggered by everything that was going on in that moment and I just popped off with Kenya. Like, oh my God, come on. You were triggered by the stuff that you started. You pulled the you literally pulled the trigger on this just so you know. You're the one who was sassing up.
Starting point is 00:48:05 Did you expect Kenya to just be like, oh my God, I am so sorry, Britt. I'm so sorry that I've been speaking rudely to you. Do you think Kenya Moore's gonna say that? No. Yeah. And also I wish I had shown them a clip of Portia coming in and not hugging most of them, you know?
Starting point is 00:48:21 Cause Britt's whole thing was like, oh, you don't even hug me, just give me a pat. Thank God. So, um, she was trying too hard and um, Portia was like, well, you know, like maybe that was a heated moment. Okay. You know, like I had a heated moment at Shemeah's house and we got into the elevator and you know, I'm like, I wish I had my pistol.
Starting point is 00:48:41 I mean, what do you think I want it for? Oh, so she was saying, what if I had done that? What if when I was heated, I said, I wish I had my pistol. And so Britt's like, well, okay, you're right. That wasn't the time for me to talk about a pistol. And I think full accountability. I'm sorry, I know you're in a moment when it's like, ever gonna do anything that hurt Kenya,
Starting point is 00:49:05 but I do regret the whole situation and I feel terrible about it. Yeah. Oh, shoot. So, um, Brittany's like, you know, I can 100% apologize, you know, whatever. Like, I don't want to give her any more ammo. I just want to like show up and just put this thing to sleep. Like the producers told me to.
Starting point is 00:49:32 And, you know, so, and Portia's like, everyone deserves to be heard unless you're Drew Sidora. In many different ways on that front. So then Britt is like, yeah, I was wrong and I stand well outside with a flag. She's fully doing the, like she's doing her, everything that produces a basement, like you have to get on that camera
Starting point is 00:49:54 and you better wave that white flag. So now we're at Angela and Charles's and Charles is cooking just mass amounts of chicken. Buckets of chicken, Buckets of chicken. Literal buckets of chicken. Who is this man feeding? Who is he feeding? I mean, I know tall people eat a lot, but God damn, man.
Starting point is 00:50:13 Is he cooking for the crew? Is that what's happening? He's like, well, the crew's coming over to shoot, so. Maybe. Maybe, yeah. That's actually a good call. Maybe he is cooking for the crew. He might be one of those people that's,
Starting point is 00:50:25 yeah, he's just always cooking and like large amounts. And maybe that's why he's getting such a good edit because you know, they can take a husband like Charles and edit him many different ways. And so far they're like, no, he's a grouch, but he's a fun loving grouch who makes a lot of food. So maybe you're right. Maybe you're onto something.
Starting point is 00:50:44 So she is redoing her bathroom because Angela cannot stop redoing things. She's doing five houses that is, even her own damn bathroom, she's just taking a hammer to the walls. Like, what the fuck? Excuse me, that's Amari's bathroom because her mother paid for it.
Starting point is 00:50:59 So it belongs to her. Amari's like, get out of my bathroom, mother. She drives in. She drives through the front door in her grandma's car. Knock down the wall for you. She's very irresponsible. So, Angela's getting ready. And so she calls Charles upstairs. This is so fun. I'm sorry to interrupt you, but I love how she
Starting point is 00:51:27 called him. She's like, you know, getting her face ready to put on makeup. She goes Charles Charles never listens. He just pretends he can't hear. He's literally frying chicken and she wants him to step away from like the boiling hot oil. I cooked some chicken last night on the grill and I literally almost burned everything down. There was such a big fire. I do not, you could not pay me enough money to walk away from like chicken in like hot, burny things because like I know the moment that I step away from bubbling oil, everything's
Starting point is 00:52:02 going down smoke. It's a disaster. And then he full on goes upstairs to the bathroom to have a whole scene while chicken is bubbling away and boiling hot oil. I don't, it's terrifying. Yeah, but he's bold, Charles. Charles is a little afraid of making a chicken wait. So, and plus he's got 9,000 other pieces that he can cut. So like what's one?
Starting point is 00:52:23 And they'll just give it to the little kid, you know? So Charles comes in, she talks about going to this Kenya more hair thing and does he want to come? He's like, no, I've got hair, which I don't know what that even really translates into an answer. But he's like, why would I go hair? I've already got hair. Okay, it's not a hair
Starting point is 00:52:45 restoration company. It's not, it's a, it's a opening. It's not, we're not going there to get services. He's like, what are they gonna give me a lineup? He's like, I've got one. She's like, no, just to support, you know, and he's like, well, why would I go? She's well, cause you want to support me. And he's like, well, you're aware that this is an all lady event. And also, I bought all the chicken in Costco, and that's going to be at least three more hours of frying chicken for the next.
Starting point is 00:53:12 I don't think I have time to get away. And she's like, OK, well, I got to tell you this, Charles. There was a moment that Portia had where you're going to love this. She said, oh, I got some tea on Charles. And he goes, what, is she the fed or something? Why do I love Charles so much? Please Charles don't turn out to be a monster.
Starting point is 00:53:33 Cause I really like you so far. Yeah. It's actually kind of funny cause he does kind of have the vibe of someone who's been in like, who's been famous for a long time where he just doesn't care. So Angela's like, well, I think a lot of people feel like my husband is my soft spot. So in order to crack the egg, if you will, they want to throw a dagger at our marriage or whatever. So now you can speculate all the hell you want,
Starting point is 00:53:54 but you better not say something about my husband who's not my soft spot, but don't talk about it. It's like, is he, is we'll talking about Charles crack the egg or will it not crack the egg? Yeah, she doubled, she double speaks, right? Cause she goes, now you can speculate all you want, but you better not say anything about my husband. Which is it? She's like, you can talk about him all you want,
Starting point is 00:54:15 but you better not talk about it. It's, it's very Magali from Real Housewives of Cheshire whose tagline was, you want to talk about Magali? You better not talk about Magali. That's a direct quote. One of the all-time best taglines. So Charles was like, she doesn't even know me. And she goes, well, I don't know what it was.
Starting point is 00:54:35 And he goes, OK, well, tell her to stay in her own lane, because she's barking up the wrong tree. She goes, OK. And he goes, she better hit her brakes a couple of times. Oh, that bark. OK, so is she barking up a tree or is she driving down the wrong lane? She's in a car barking.
Starting point is 00:54:49 She's barking up a tree. And I was a little surprised that neither of them said, the oak tree, cause that is her tagline, right? And he is known as the oak. So Angela's like, well, let me all handle this because I don't wanna do anything. He's like, yeah, you should have handled it when she said it. Yeah, well, I did. And she says a joke. He's like, no, say don't joke.
Starting point is 00:55:10 She goes, well, yeah, yeah, we don't play like that. He's like, yeah, Google, Google on Google me twice. And what comes up? She's like, yeah. I love that Google me twice. So he goes, do your job. And when you got her, let me twice. So he goes, do your job. And when you got her, let me know. Okay, Charles, he does not care. He checks his timer. He's like, there's a chicken calling. Goodbye. Stupid plotline over with. Okay, bye. So he leans like, fix this bathroom. God damn. He's like, great. And now I've just overcooked five of my 67 pieces of chicken that I'm going through today.
Starting point is 00:55:46 No, I'm telling you that man did not overcook one piece of chicken. He had it timed. I love that he whupped out his timer. He was like, OK, that's enough of you. You've taken 45 of my seconds. Goodbye. Yeah, that is actually the mark of someone
Starting point is 00:55:57 who knows how to cook chicken. I actually respect that so much when people like, I was joking about how I'm scared to step away from if I'm frying anything or grilling anything because it's dangerous. But it's also because like I don't have that like instinct that some people do people who are good at that they just they can just step away and then you know they just sort of like oh yeah okay it's done and you just walk back I'm like how do you do that it's amazing. Yeah he has his own little chicken timer, which I like. He's got his own special timer.
Starting point is 00:56:29 God bless. So. It's 24 seconds long. She comes down with him and she washes her hands. And then the little kid comes down and he's like, do you want some chicken? So he takes some chicken and then Angela reaches over and he's like, wash your hands.
Starting point is 00:56:43 And she was like, I did wash my hands. And then they do like a full rewind to show her washing her hands. She's like, anyway, there's still a lot going on with Alicia and my mama. So, you know, it's like, I just haven't, I still haven't talked to Alicia. He's like, all right, well, so I'm not talking to my sister.
Starting point is 00:57:01 What's the difference? He's like, fuck him. Who needs him? Yeah, sisters, am I'm not talking to my sister. What's the difference? It's like fuck up who needs them Yeah sisters, am I right? I want to talk to my if I want to deal with sisters. I'll watch the NBC show That's now available on streaming at long last and she keeps she tries again. She's like, okay. Well, anyway I'm gonna call my mother and my sister and goes oh my god. Why do you keep bringing up your issues with me? Why? Do you see I'm making chicken? Like how many issues are
Starting point is 00:57:27 you going to bring up with me in one day? And she's like, you're we're married. You're who I talked to. And he's like, he goes, I ain't got no time to be taking your feelings in begging to do this to do that. I mean, just let it go. And wash your hands while you're at it. Charles. Charles seems both like the worst husband on the planet and also the best. Like I think I need someone like that. It's just like your problems are stupid.
Starting point is 00:57:53 Can we please stop talking about them and just eat? My God. I know. I love that he's literally saying to his wife, why are you talking to me about your issues? Am I like some sort of like important person in your life right now? I guess if I was just reading this on paper, I'd be like, this guy's a fucking monster. You better run Angela. I'm pulling my van up outside jumping. But I don't know, there's something about how the way he says it that I'm like, he's so romantic. Like maybe I could get married. You know what, I think what you're, I think what you are responding to is that he kind of has a no nonsense,
Starting point is 00:58:25 no nonsense, no bullshit thing going on. And probably when he says, why are you talking to me about your issues? It's his way of saying like, I know all this. Why are you telling me about it again? Because she's obviously saying it because it has to be on camera. And he's like, don't tell me about I've already heard this. I only want to hear something once. I don't care if it's on camera or not. Why I think how I'm taking it is like a, just a no nonsense kind of a, or like don't sweat the small stuff kind of a person. He's like, oh my God, your sister's fighting with someone?
Starting point is 00:58:53 I'm shocked. Wow. The real housewives are trying to cause drama and say I'm a cheater. Oh, like am I supposed to be scared? I'm taking it like he just doesn't, he's, I take it as him not being mean to her, him just being like, why are we worried about stupid shit? We're rich and we're
Starting point is 00:59:08 happy. Can we just like, yeah, can we just chill and not worry about stupid fucking petty stuff? Exactly. So Angela's saying that Charles relationship with his mom and sister is non-existent because remember it all went sour when the mom said something about cleaning something. It's a real bone of contention for Charles. Yeah. I mean, listen, I don't get into family business cause my family's rough enough. I'm not putting up with your family too. Okay. Fuck all family. And I like at least someone's honest cause we have, you know,
Starting point is 00:59:39 we have both Angela and Brit like, Oh, family is so important. But you both, your family, your family's full of assholes, as you've told us. Like they're trying to pretend, but then you've got Britt who doesn't really, she's not there for her sister, like we learned last week. And I'm not accusing Angela of anything, but we know they're fucked up.
Starting point is 00:59:59 So it's refreshing to hear someone be like, fuck your family. If your family is gonna be assholes then fuck them Yeah, yeah exactly. That's refreshing. I like it Hello there, this is a two-part recap, okay, this is the end of part one So thank you so much for listening to this just come back a little later for part two Watch what crap ins would like to thank it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alice in King.
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