Watch What Crappens - #2827 RHOA S1609: Mind Your P’s and Bailey-Q’s

Episode Date: May 5, 2025

Real Housewives of Atlanta brings back the Bailey-Q where an energetic prophet has deep thoughts on G-Wagons and other salient things.  Plus, Angela and Porsha settle their lukewarm beef. To watch this recap on video, listen to our White Lotus bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Tickets for the Mounting Hysteria Tour are now on sale at watchwhatcrappens.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watcha Crappin's ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. When a young woman named Desiree vanishes without a trace, the trail leads to Kat Torres, a charismatic influencer with millions of followers. But behind the glamorous posts and inspirational quotes, a sinister truth unravels. Binge all episodes of Don't Cross Cat early and ad-free on Wondery Plus. Hello and welcome to Watch Our Crapins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the one and only Ronnie Karam. Hi Ronnie, welcome to your work week.

How are you? Well, thank you. So glad to be here. It's my cookie day. I brought some cookies. Cookies. You know, Melissa Gorga randomly got a full fledged article in the New York Times this weekend about her sprinkle cookies,

which is shocking because those sprinkle cookies came out like 10 years after the fact. And now the article is dropping like 10 months after the fact. So I don't know, I guess people don't care about Tommy and this when it comes to Melissa Gorga and her cookies. But yeah, she got those. She got a full, a full spread, which is major to get in the New York Times. Um, but you know, the cookies are pretty good. I have to say I had some and they're, they're shockingly good, but that we're not here to talk about Melissa Gorga today. We are here because it is a day to recap Real Housewives of Atlanta.

And of course, before we dive into that, this is like our Texas week. Welcome to Texas week on Crappins and it's Texas week because I'm going to Texas. I'm joining, I'm joining my work husband Ronnie in Texas and we are putting on a show in Austin this Friday at EMOs, where we will recap the most recent episode of Summer House. And then the next day we are driving to Dallas. So you know there will be a Ben and Ronnie on the road bonus episode to come.

And in Dallas we are going to the Texas theater and we are recapping the classic Vanderbump rules episode, sex lies and audio tapes season six, episode five. So that will be a great time. And then I have some bonus Texas, which is that on Wednesday I'm going to see the cowboy Carter tour. Uh, so I'm going to see Beyonce. So I'll be sort of like spiritually in Houston on Wednesday, even though I'll be in Los Angeles. So it's a big Texas week for me. I'm very excited.

I'm jealous. You're going to go see the bee. I'm gonna see my it's my first ever Beyonce concert too. Oddly enough, I was gonna try to see the last one, but I got COVID. But also, please join us on Patreon, patreon.com slash watch or crap ins to get access to bonus episodes like our upcoming one, or all the ones in the past that we've done that have been wonderful. And also you can watch us with crap is on demand. So don't just listen. You can watch, Oh, and by the way, our tickets go to watch your crap is.com to get links to our tickets. And I think that's all the, the major stuff. Oh, of course, duh. We just added two new shows in case you missed it last week. We added a Los Angeles show and

a Seattle show. The Seattle show is June 12th. I think it's safe to say, I don't wanna overstep, but I think it's safe to say the night before, well, I don't know, I'm not gonna say anything, but June 12th is our Seattle show at the Neptune. And then June 19th is our Los Angeles show. So come join us for those. Those are gonna be great times.

And that will be, we are going to end our big tour, our own Cowboy Carter tour, the Mounting Astereo tour in Los Angeles on the 19th. So come join us. It'll be great. It's going to be some great times, y'all. All right, let's get into Real Housewives of Atlanta season 16, episode nine, blame it on the Henny. Blame it on the Henny. You know what I'm going to blame it on? I'm going to blame it on the Henny. Blame it on the Henny. You know what I'm going to blame it on? I'm going to blame it on the Baily Q. Because I have something to say. I thought long and hard about this.

You know, I think Cynthia's been doing a very nice job in the role of friend of the season. I've been really enjoying her in that position. So they resurrected the Baily Q for this episode, which is, the Baily Q is kind of like one of those, like, repeat events that we get that no one's like particularly excited about. It's not like going to the Berkshires, but like, you're like, okay. And they sort of like push it on us enough that when she says I'm doing the

Bailey Q you think, oh wow, it's the Bailey Q episode. And then you realize, do I care about the Bailey Q episode? And I think, here's my thought. I think Lake Bailey is, is beautiful. It's a beautiful house. It's a wonderful piece of real estate. I think it's too small for the Bailey queue. I don't think that Kenya, I mean, I don't think that, um, Cynthia's house can sustain the Bailey queue because they're always cramped around that sofa. They've got no place to put their plates. And she just has this, she always has like wet meats, a lot of barbecue sauce and no one has,

everyone has to hold it in their laps. I'm surprised no one stains all their dresses. It's just, the logistics don't work out for me. And I think it's time that we move on from the Bailey Cube because of that. I like the tightness of it because it means more mess. And that's what you need. Like whenever they try to walk off, they can't walk off,

which is hilarious. They're like, I'm outta here. They can just walk to the kitchen counter and then they have to walk back. So I actually like it. And actually, I'm appreciating the like Bailey a lot more these days. I like love the views. I love the size just because it's like a more comfortable size to have to live in. So I like that. Here's where I think the problem is. And maybe is where it's bothering you is this wasn't a messy Bailey queue. Normally she pulls out the game like,

okay, now we're gonna ask questions. And then the questions are messy and then everybody fights. But this time she was like, since it's Juneteenth, let's talk about black history. Girl, this is Real Housewives of Atlanta. It's not that black history is not important. I wanna see people fighting. I don't want, they're not gonna fight

over Juneteenth quizzes, okay? We need to see fights. I also feel like there's something very chaotic to me They're not going to fight over Juneteenth quizzes. Okay. We need to see fights. I also feel like there's something very chaotic to me about the fact that they all cram in on the sofa and cause she always invites so many people, like people that aren't even on the show and they all have to sit on the sofa. But then there's like this strange kind of like gaggle of men that got crammed into the kitchen because they're not allowed to be on camera basically, or not allowed to be in the scene.

So I always feel like there's just like so much activity and people are jammed in there and it just feels humid in there. And I just find it to be an uncomfortable place to look at. Like I think she just, if she's gonna host an event like this, she's gonna have to upgrade her house or invite fewer people.

It's time to make tough decisions. Tough decisions by Ben Mandelker. Get rid of your house. If you want to keep the job, get an extra living room. It's my official note on this. Okay. So speaking of Cynthia, oddly enough, Cynthia opens up the show. They've been experimenting with different ways to do the previouslies on Atlanta. I mean, I, I kind of feel like, can we just get some normal previous leaves?

Can we just like, like I don't need there to be a skit when we do previously is I just give us previously on Atlanta and show us some scenes. I don't like last week was a real low with that song. And now Cynthia is doing a whole thing, which is a little bit better where she's like, oh, I had to recap what happened in Nashville. So I had to go talk to everyone to find out what really happened.

And the trip was a little bit weird. And I took my butt to bed early. So now I've got to find out what happened. So then we just do it. It's a Cynthia investigation. So she is going to lunch with everybody to figure out just where it all went wrong, child. So we start with lunch with Kelly and Shamia. And so Kelly is like, well, we were just upstairs getting our beauty rest because we stayed up till 5 a.m. And Shamia is like, we had a stinkin' good time. Okay, stop. Stop singing. She's like,

let me tell you what happened at 4 a.m. Bitchy, bitchy spider. I think Shamia would wear me out. I never saw the side of Shamia before, but I think Shamia constantly breaking into song, basically being like an eternal drama club kid. It's- You've already got me.

I mean, how many of us do you need? You can only really have one of us in your life at one time, you know, drama kids. Yeah, but you're a different kind. You're like, I feel like the sassy gay version, you're not even that sassy, but I think the gay, the gay theater queen vibe is one thing, but it's not like- You're supposed to say you're not even that gay. But you're not even that gay. You're not even that sassy, but I think the gay, the gay theater queen vibe is one thing, but it's not like- You're supposed to say you're not even that gay.

But you're not even that gay. You're not even that much of a queen. You just took away the good part. There's just something, there's like the Anne Hathaway- You're still highly penis loving, but I'm gonna take that sassy away. Because I think you're like aware, versus you sort of get that sense

that every time Shemeah breaks into song, she's doing like a micro audition. And I don't think that you're doing that. You're trying to, you're usually singing in pursuit of being funny. No, I like what happens at auditions with me. Nothing. At some point you just stop auditioning.

Yeah, I just feel like Shamiah is sort of doing these tiny little auditions everywhere. And I'm, I don't know. I is sort of doing these tiny little auditions everywhere. And I'm, I don't know, I really, they really set her up to become like the glue of this season. And I'm surprised that she's not. Well, they literally said, she said at the beginning, I'm the glue. I'm the glue of the season. So she set herself up to be the glue. You know what? I don't need glue. And here's the things that I don't like, things that you have to glue. Okay. I learned that from craft, craft night, you know, things that constantly need to be glued can get out of the way. I don't like, things that you have to glue. Okay, I learned that from Craft Night. Things that constantly need to be glued

can get out of the way. I don't need it, it gets all over your fingers. Glue's not fun, it's made out of dead horse hoofs. She's like the paperclip of the season. She definitely brings things together, but easily disposed of and falls apart. And so, I don't think that she's as gluey as I think that she has claimed,

because I don't find her to be in the center of much. And I think, I feel like she's as gluey as I think that she has claimed because I don't find her to be in the center of much. And I think like, I feel like she's sort of, if anything, she's kind of fallen a little bit to the wayside. I guess maybe her storyline about how her child got an ear infection and she started to cry about it wasn't as compelling as she thought it was. Well, I think they're doing that whole, let's build the show around Shemeah thing. And so she's just really trying to give the end the star energy. It's like, I'm the center, I have all the friends, I'm the glue,

I'm the singer, I've got the biggest house. And she does have all of that, but she doesn't really have main character energy, you know? Like, the glue is usually not the main character. But, you know, I mean, I like Shemeah, okay. there needs to be kind of main characters in Housewives. And I don't think right now we've got any. I think Angela's probably coming close, but she's kind of sidelined by all the other women. So that makes it hard. But she's the closest, but I still don't think we have one.

But you know, it is kind of a first season of a reboot. So, you know, you've got to wait to see what cream rises to the top. Well, I think that like, Shamia, like her trajectory was looked like it was going up, up, up. And that's kind of plateaued a bit, but still like her. I mean, look, I've always, always enjoyed Shamia even in her old versions of Atlanta. I just think that like what I thought she was gonna be this season has plateaued.

However, I do think that Angela is kind of the breakout star and the breakout main character of this season. And I think the producers thought it was going to be Portia. But if you look online, it's actually amazing how so many people are really coming down on Portia and like really kind of universally, everyone seems to really love Angela. So I think that like maybe part of it is because Angela has found herself in that coveted role of Kind of being as much of like quote-unquote the victim as one could be on this season well, which is funny actually because Britt would be the victim but Angela somehow is the one who's like sort of semi ostracized and that always works well with the audience

Well, she's also got the best stories, you know, the family is real weird. No one can kind of piece together what's going on. Did her husband impregnate somebody? I mean, there's a lot to go on. So, you know, we'd love a good mystery. We like letting things fall apart on these shows. So she's got the potential. She does. And she also has that vibe of like,

you are all children, right? Like she kind of has that vibe of, I'm married to a very successful former NBA player. And I don't know why you guys are trying to come for me because I'll destroy each and every one of you one by one. And I have no problem doing it. Yeah. She has the most entertaining husband. She's got the most entertaining extra family members kind of lying around extra stories. So yeah, so far she's and she's not afraid of anybody, which is really no one. So we skipped to Angela's, and she's not afraid of anybody, which is really helpful. No one. So we skipped Angela's version and Angela's like, well, you know, I'm hearing voices outside my

window and they're calling me big bird. And then we go back to lunch with Kelly and Shemia. And they're saying, well, you know, Brit's shade was that the husband cheated and he had this outside baby on his slate. And Cynthia's like, oh, wait a minute, what, what? And so then Portia said, and then we cut back to Angela, she goes, she said, well, I should fuck Charles. That's what Portia said, I should fuck Charles. And Cynthia's like, oh, Jesus, oh, Jesus, we need a Juneteenth and a quiz on black history.

That will fix everything. So we see the flashbacks and we see Portia saying, so you came down here to tell me you heard me say Charles's name. And Angela's saying to Portia, well, I hear that you're talking about me. So I put my pajamas on and said, let's address this. So then Cynthia's like, Portia, you said something about how you'd have sex with Charles. And she's like, um, I actually don't even remember saying that. But later in the episode, I will tell you specifically why I said it and what the reasoning was in the full context, but I don't remember saying it. Are we going to blame it on the Henny? She's like, wait a minute. It's Hennessy saved me

that night because I was about to blow that bitch all the way up, okay? But I wouldn't fuck anybody's husband, okay? Again, I swear. So we all know that she just said, oh really, she's so afraid of me fucking husbands. Well, maybe I should fuck her husband then. See how she likes that. Which I don't think is really that bad in the end.

I wish she'd just say that because we don't need multiple episodes on this. Yeah, I actually think that this was probably said like as like a joke and I do think this is being, it has been blown up. So then we go back to Kelly and Shemeah talking and she's like, well, when we got back, I gave her a minute and I texted her. And then I guess, then I guess Angela sent her a big text, but then we go back to, oh no, she goes, oh, did Shemeah send Angela a text, right? And Angela sent her a big long text, correct? Yes. Then Angela, yeah, Angela sends this big long text, after witnessing the disrespectful behavior, behavior towards me and my husband, there's nothing to be said, dot, dot, dot." And then she speaks.

She's like, there's nothing to be said. And here's 10 pages of text. And they keep fast forwarding the reading of it. She's like, and it's clear that our morals and values don't align. Morals, values. It's all good though. Be blessed. Pete Slauson They're like, wow. So, Cynthia's like, well, the only thing that's open after midnight is legs, jail, and the ER. And that's why you need to take your ass to bed early. Like, well, no, because if you didn't take yourself to bed early, you wouldn't have to go around and ask and have all these conversations with people. You'd know all the information. I say stay awake and get it firsthand. Yeah. So, we have the Ba'alik you announced, and there's a prophet coming, which I know Cynthia thinks is some big deal, but we've already had Drew do that in a previous season,

Cynthia, okay? We had the prophet lot. That's right. It's a lot of Christians with prophets coming. I don't feel like that's like spoken against in the Bible, but I don't know. I haven't renewed my membership in a while. I didn't know the prophets were like a thing. Like, I didn't know this was like an alternative to our standard psychics and tarot card readers and things like that. It's more Christian. Yeah, I didn't know about this. So, I didn't know that like there was a whole, you can go down the prophet route. I thought prophets, there hasn't been a profit in like a few thousand years.

Well, there haven't been that's why it's weird that they're bringing the Mac and the profits all have great makeup now, which I don't think original profits like had really good makeup and hair. I think they were always just in like sheet robes and like had scrabbly hair and they like climbed down from the mountain somewhere where they were like writing tablets like who the fuck does that like get a pen, you know? Yeah, I like that like there's just because you're a prophet doesn't mean you can't dress well. So I like this new brand of yeah, so Atlanta is at least like upping the profit game.

So yeah, now we have profits and this one's so like this one's kind of hilarious. So now we go to a birthday party for a dog and it's Cha Cha, Kelly's dog. It's her birthday party. And we see lots of drag queen dogs gathering for this party. Good way to put it, drag dogs.

And I feel so bad for this dog, not only because it's died and jeweled and all of that stuff, but because the dog isn't able to enjoy its own party. It's like, who's raising this dog? Fucking Bella Hadid's mom, what was her name? Yolanda? Yolanda, the almond mom, it's like, you can have half an almond and that is all.

You want a birthday cake? You can lick the, whatever icing comes off of the candle and that is all you got for your birthday. And that is all you got for your birthday. And that is how this dog is. There's a dog like chasing frisbees and jumping up, and this dog just wants to play and she's like, no, you will sit on your little mat, cha-cha. And she brings a mat because, God forbid, cha-cha step on the grass. And cha-cha has to like stay within this little, I just feel bad for the dog. It's not, this dog's not enjoying his life.

Gypsy Cha Cha Blanchard. That's what she should be named. It's just like you stay here Cha Cha. We're going to protect you. Cha Cha is ill right now. I think that- Cha Cha has pneumonia and bone cancer and bow cancer. She's got cancer in her dog bow. Cha Cha, would you like to say anything? She's still so young. Yeah, it is kind of funny that they got like a dog to do, like a professional dog trick dog, you know, that like catches frisbees quickly and stuff like that.

And making all the other dogs watch it, I was like, was this to shame the dogs? Be like, you could be doing this. You can't just like torturing the dogs. I was like, was this to shame the dogs? Be like, you could be doing this. That's like for a human party, you getting you being like, it's a pizza party. Okay, Ronnie, we're gonna have one guy just eat pizza in front of you and you can't eat it. Like what the fuck kind of party is this for me? I don't have birthday parties. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crap and commercial. commercial. It's time for a Crappins commercial.

Everyone has that friend who seems kind of perfect. For Patty, that friend was Desiree. Until one day... I texted her and she was not getting the text. So I went to Instagram and she has no Instagram anymore. And Facebook? No Facebook anymore. Desiree was gone and there was one person who knew the answer. I am a spiritual person, a magical person, a witch. A gorgeous Brazilian influencer called Cat Torres, but who was hiding a secret. From Wondery, based on my smash hit podcast from Brazil, comes a new series, Don't Cross Cat, about a search that led me to a mystery in a Texas suburb. I'm calling to check on the two missing Brazilian girls.

Maybe get some undercover crew there. The family are freaking out. They are lost. I'm Chico Felitti. You can listen to Don't Cross Cat on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. listen to Don't Cross Cat on the Wondry app or wherever you get your podcasts. Some people get a wild haircut or book a spontaneous trip when life throws them a curve ball. But Molly? Well, she dove headfirst into a world of no strings attached sex, secret rendezvous, forbidden affairs and unforgettable adventures.

And together we tell every juicy detail in Dying for Sex, Wondry's award-winning podcast that's now streaming on a TV near you, starring Michelle Williams and Jenny Slate. And to top it off, we're dropping brand new bonus episodes where I sit down with the cast to spill all the spicy secrets. Desire, friendship, self-discovery, and the ultimate bucket list of pleasure. This is a story that had everyone talking. Listen to the original Dying for Sex and brand new episodes on the Wondry app or wherever you get your podcasts.

You can binge the original series before anyone else and completely ad free on Wondry Plus. I just think that ChaCha's dye job is so bad. So I understand like why Cha-Cha has bright and vivid colors because that way Cha-Cha can never be stolen and go away anonymously. Unless of course the person who steals Cha-Cha just gives Cha-Cha, I don't know, a shower. But I still think that like as dye,

like if you're gonna do a vibrant die job, just do a good one. Like this just looks sad. I feel like this is what it must have looked like in 1984 and in 1985 when people tried to kind of like copy Cyndi Lauper or something like that. And they sort of like emerged from their bathrooms with just these hideous, hideous, like purple or orange hair.

And their parents are like, what the fuck are you doing to yourself? Yeah. And I guess it's so that the dog is recognizable if it's kidnapped or is it because it's too ugly to be kidnapped? Because that would explain a lot of my childhood haircuts. I mean, I would like to ask my mom, like, why would you give me haircuts like that as a child? Well, you weren't kidnapped, were you?

And identifying haircuts. Did you have a signature haircut? I made you completely unwannable. Okay, no kidnapper. Even the kidnappers didn't want you. I'd leave you out in front of the grocery store in that little nickel horsey. You put a nickel in, you'd bounce up and down the horsey in a parking lot, I'd just leave you out there, nobody took you, cause you were ugly. Guy made you ugly enough that nobody wanted you. It's also, I think, statistically harder to abduct a child when they're bouncing around so much on those horses.

It's like, whoa, how do I get my hands on them? Can I get a less active child? So Kelly is, Kelly's talking about this dog party and she's like, oh, my dog is fabulous. She, you know, she gets the hair salon for nine hours and gets her hair colored and gets a massage and her lashes put on. Okay, that's too much. You cannot glue lashes to a dog, but she does. Gets her jewels put onto her fur.

And sometimes she gets her nails done and it costs over a thousand dollars. Girl, pay your rent and get your clothes off rolling racks in one of your kids rooms. You know what I mean? That's when you have extra money. When you, when you have money to do your dogs for a thousand dollars, your clothes are not on rolling racks and you've paid your rent for your store, for the waffle empire. Yeah, this is this this almost makes her jump the line ahead of Brit in terms of candidate for first person to have financial legal woes

from this new cast. Although Britain's hard to be hard to beat, because she definitely has like MLM written all over her MLM fraud. But I guess we'll see. But I think usually when someone's doing this kind of ostentatious display of spending money, usually it's to cover up, in my mind, terrible spending habits.

Or it actually is a terrible spending habit. It just shows. It's, okay, symptom of, thank you, period. Symptom of bad, yeah, symptom of bad spending habits. So then we unfortunately get to hear Britt's voice next. My mom said, Cha Cha, my heart ladies are fabulous. They live a little gamy little slush. Please stop talking, please, whatever you do, listen,

I'm not saying the whole season's a bust, but you're starting to kill me with Britt. I can't listen to that, I can't listen to it. And people are complaining to us, like that's the most annoying thing you guys do on this podcast. I have to forward through the yes. And I get it. But listen, that's the that's the only impression we can even do with this new cast. And it's the most annoying thing I've ever fucking heard. So get rid of her and then you get rid of us. So you guys start to change.org position to

get rid of that lady or at least get some straws implanted in her nose so she can breathe again, because I can't take it, it hurts my head. Her septum has deviated so much, it's almost been like made illegal. I think that also, I think it's time for us to, we need to politely also bring an end to this mimosa agenda. We have to stop, mimosa is not gonna happen. There are a lot of dogs in bravo, some dogs happen, some dogs don't. Mimosa agenda. We have to stop. Mimosa is not going to happen. There are a lot of dogs in Braavos. Some dogs happen, some dogs don't. Mimosa is not going to happen.

I feel like… Jared Liesveld I feel like Cha-Cha is in the running, right? Because Cha-Cha has the pink and the jewels and the fake lashes. Like, Cha-Cha is making, I mean, yeah, Cha-Cha is making an effort. Mimosa is just like a random dog, okay? Trey Lockerby Mimosa, I mean, what's funny about Mimosa, Mimosa is really cute. Mimosa almost looks like a lamb. Mimosa is like a fake lamb dog. But she brings Mimosa to the party and Mimosa has a little black ribbon on. I'm like, who is Mimosa mourning right now? And I'm like, there's just nothing

about Mimosa that seems like Mimosa should even be called Mimosa. If Mimosa was literally just called lamb, I have a thing about pets being named after other animals, but I think in this case, I would be okay with calling mimosa lamb because mimosa is so lamby. But I just, I feel like every episode it's like, mimosa. And I'm like, I know, I have not accepted it. I agree with you.

And also when I think of the word mimosa, I just think of waste of a glass because you're pouring orange juice in a champagne. Like, just give me the champagne Okay, if you want me to have orange juice with it put it on the side But don't charge me $15 for a half a glass of champagne So I just feel like mimosas are wasting my time in general. So And also like mimosas connotes brunch you think of like a Sunday being fabulous

Casual fun drinking all like bottomless mimosas. It's going to be a wonderful day. And then every time you see this poor dog, it's just sitting there like a lamby lump. It's like a little, a little sad lamb. There's nothing about this dog that like speaks of brunch. I mean, Cha-Cha speaks of brunch. Cha-Cha should be called mimosas, if anything, not Cha-Cha.

But like mimosas, yeah, it's just not happening. Sorry, sorry. We're voting Mimosa out. So take her with you, Britt. You're also voted out. So we find out that Britt's mom is moving in with her, which is good because she has that unstable sister who you know is gonna come make everything about herself,

which she does. That's what she does in this episode. I would not speak to this sister. I'm telling you that right now. That sister's too much. You know everything that you do, that sister's like, well, what about me? And starts to fake cry and get the fuck out of here.

We're adults. I don't have to take this shit. Go home. That sister, I mean, look, we should have known. Her name is Cher and she looks like Snooki. So you know she's gonna be dramatic. And she certainly is. And she is.

So we find out that the mom is moving into Britt's house and she's selling her house. And so, this is at least going to be funny. And then we see a flashback to Britt chatting with her mom and Angela. And the mom's like, well, I'll move into your house for a little while, but then when you have that baby, I'm moving out. Bye. She's like, no, mom, that's why I want you to be here. Free baby. She's like, I'm retired from, I already raised three monsters. I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna ruin another one. So once that baby's here, I'm out. Raise your own monster. So share is also going to come help them pack as we mentioned and Britt's saying, well,

you know, when I launched my insurance agency, my sisters worked for me, but then I sold the company and it threw a wedge salad between my sisters and I and Gorgonzola smells. So then now the people are supportive of her again because she went through some drama with Kenya and her Who-ha picks or whatever was out there her blowjob picks so She just wants everybody to get along guys Yeah, yeah the sisters have come back together after after an insurance agency nearly tore them asunder which is still like Loki

Very funny. I'm sorry. I mean, you know, it's sad when sisters are, you know, when family hates each other. But the fact that it was like the sale of an insurance company that like drove a wedge between the three of them is like low key very, very funny to me. But luckily, revenge porn can solve everything and it has brought them all together. So things are on the up and up. That's all you need. Just release some blow job picks. So then we go to Porsche's house and she's going to her mother's house actually. And she's with PJ and Lauren. And Porsche's like, well, you know, it's been really rough because I haven't been the best mom. I've been in a bad mood. So I got her a dog. Yeah, she, she, this was such an unceremonious arrival of a new dog into Bravo. It was like, Oh, by the way, like here, um, I brought us some takeout and mom, I picked

you up some Starbucks and Pilar, here's a dog, a new dog. That's already better than mimosa. A living breathing thing. Yeah. This dog is better than mimosa cause it's already, that's one of those fancy dogs. And then it's named after a good thing, peanut butter, which is good. So I just love Porsche's whole thing. Like I really don't have the energy to devote to my child's needs right now.

So I just got her a dog. So hopefully that'll, that'll help. Yeah. Cause she basically is like, Pilar is getting to the age where she's wondering about having another sibling. And she's like, I don't know. I don't know where the siblings are going to come from. So, well, they always say dogs need other dogs. So why not a child with a dog? That'll work, right? I like that she said she wants another sibling and I don't know where to buy one. So, so she gets her dog instead. So now they're talking about the divorce date with Simon. And, you know, of course course her family's always

over supportive of Portia. Portia never does anything wrong. And she's like, well, you know, then I got a phone call about Dennis shooting with this girl, Drew. And they're like, oh my God, how could Drew do this to you? How are you supposed to navigate with this, Portia? Poor Portia.

You know, I'm literally sitting here and I'm like about to blow my cap because in that moment I felt betrayed because I was like, damn, so not only did he do it, I mean, here she is downstairs and I got to deal with it. As we see in the, in the scenes for later on this season, uh, Porsche will be shooting a scene with Ralph. So, uh, normally I would say she's such a hypocrite, but I actually, the stance I'm gonna take is that's how you do it.

You don't get mad, you get even. So it's like, okay, you're gonna film with Dennis, I will film with Ralph. Thanks for getting with the program, Portia. That's, you know, welcome back. Yeah. So then she tells them about the trip and how she was in trouble and for all this

stuff she doesn't even remember saying. And now Angela's all pissed at her and she just doesn't get it. She doesn't even remember. She's like, and so this effort hears me and she comes downstairs and she keeps going on about her husband. And, you know, I said, you know, I'll do something to your husband. I mean, I don't remember saying it, but then she said, who called me Big Bird? And then like, Oh my God, Portia, you know, I'll do something to your husband. I mean, I don't remember saying it, but then she said, who called me Big Bird? And then like, oh my God, Portia, you called her Big Bird? She goes, come on, it's my birthday. When do I get to be petty?

Yeah, apparently I said some stuff or whatever. I mean, I don't even remember. I'm telling you, but I'm telling you, I did not call her Big Bird. And Lauren's like, who's Big Bird? She's, I mean, I called her Big Bird. I mean, let me have my moment, but when do I get to be petty? Okay, I want to be petty. It's like, when have you not been petty, Portia?

When did you take a break? Okay, so now we go over to another doctor meeting with Shamiah. Shamiah's, it's not a doctor meeting, this is a surrogate meeting. So, now she gets to meet the surrogate. And so, she goes to see Shatina, and we bring in a surrogate meeting. So now she gets to meet the surrogate. And so she goes to see Shadina and we bring in the surrogate and it's Asha. So she's like, well, I just want to see if we vibe. Yeah. I want to see if Asha breaks out into song also or begin to compete over roles because it's not going to fly with me. I mean, what are you going to sit there and play sack boy together? Just stick the egg in. Like, what do you need for me? I'm an oven. Do I need to

sit? You do need to sit here and talk to the cookies while they're being made. Just leave me out of it. Give me my money. I'll push your baby out. How about, I would be the worst surrogate. If you called me while I was pregnant with your baby and you're like, how are you feeling? I'd be like, fuck off. I'd be feeling a lot better if there was ice cream here right now that you sent through Uber eats. I'd be feeling a lot better if there was ice cream here right now that you sent up through Uber Eats.

Yeah, Asha, she comes in, she seems like a perfectly nice person and they basically FaceTime, but she, Shamia does ask if Asha's dating someone and she's like, no, but apparently if Asha does start to date someone, they're like, you have to tell us because my baby is going to be in you and I can't share and I can't share that space with some guy's dick. I can't have some random peen poking my baby's head. Yeah. No occupancy, okay? It's taken.

No vacancy, I should say. So anyway, Asher seems like a nice person and they FaceTime with Gerald and he's like, hi. And Shemeah is just talking. I honestly don't care. I really don't care about her. I don Shemeah is just talking. I honestly don't care. I really don't care about her. I don't care about her. So then we go over to Angela's house.

She has to get studied. Angela's like, my husband is a former New York State basketball player. He works out every day. So they're working out and she's talking about how hard he is on her while she's working out. Yeah, that was my biggest. He's like, slower, deeper, do it better.

You're not good at this, are you? Have you ever done a pushup before in your life? Lift that better, lift it better. Okay, okay, turn it around. Okay, other side, other side. Charles, what are you talking about? Oh, sorry, I was talking to the corn on the cob I'm making over here. I'm making about 45 of them for no good

reason. I think you're doing your squats. He's like balsamic oil. So what even are those moves? I'm sorry, I'm doing the Brussels sprouts for 500 people that aren't coming over. So so she's like, so let me tell you about Nashville. So Portia was upset that I invited Drew, and she goes, well, how did you invite someone to Nashville? Why would you invite someone to someone else's trip? And she's like, listen, I wanted Portia and Drew

to kind of get along, and my intentions were good, and that's what you would do. He's like, no, I don't do shit like that. I don't even care if I get along with you. I don't, what do I care if people get along? And so she's like, he loves to play devil's advocate so much that I looked at him to get the opposing side. It's like, you know what the haters are gonna say?

Tell me Charles and he'll tell me worse than the haters tell me. It's like you're supposed to be on my side. Like you're wrong. Why would you? Yeah, what a stupid thing to say. glue your wig on. Jesus Christ, go fix your hair. Go fix your makeup. He's always looking at her with like a little rise smile. Like what bullshit did you get yourself into just to be on this

show? Yeah, he's just constantly amused by her. So she's like, well, Porsche had a dinner party. And so Porsche just to be on this show. Yeah, he's just constantly amused by her. So she's like, well, Portia had a dinner party and so Portia had Britt talking for her. And so we see that clip and he's like, well, I mean, let Portia speak for herself. I mean, doesn't she, she's got a big mouth, right? Anyway, I was just like, Portia,

why did you take that lady's husband? He's like, well, how do you know that she took him? Because the streets know that she took him and I needed something to say because I didn't have anything to say at that dinner and nothing was happening and the producer said I had to start a fight. So I just kind of took over Britt's line and or Kelly's line and did my best. Yeah, this was just a stupid move on her part. And Charles like, well, that's the worst person I talked to the streets. And she's like, well, then she told me to kiss her ass and goes, okay, well, you were wrong for asking her that. Why would you do that? And she's like, Oh, okay, be on Porsche side. You buckled up. And he's like, I don't worry about

it. And she goes, Okay, well, you need to if you're going to be on her side. Okay, anyway, now they're I heard them talking about you Charles, that you're messing with a girl in New York. And he's just smiling. And she goes, wait, are you even on the Porsche train about this one? He goes, she doesn't know me. What do I care? Well, you just, you're just so easy to fuck. Anybody can just fuck Charles. She can fuck you. He goes, wow, no, she can't. People say anything. Yeah, I get it. I'm in my sixties. I got to helicopter that thing so long to get anything going. Why is everybody acting like it's the easiest thing?

It might be easy for them. It's not easy for me. Well, I said, Portia, I hear you talking about me and my husband and you got anything to say and she politely got her ass the fuck up out of there because it got real, real fast. I'm about to go to war Charles. He's like, and I'm about to go to war on this macaroni and cheese, okay.

The server, I'm about to make 45 pounds of it. Yeah, it's like showing the West side of Chicago, baby. She's like, I will. So then we go back to the Porsche and family scene and she's like, yeah, you know, I'm going to get an au pair now. So that's good because you know, this is yeah, you know, I'm going to get an au pair now. So that's good. Because, you know, this is hard, you know, Ballard needs more. So I got her a dog and an au pair.

So Dennis comes over and Miss Diane's like, well, an au pair, this feels like an arranged marriage, Portia. I'm getting a wife. So then Portia says, it's really important to me that Dennis and I have a good cohesive co-parenting relationship right now. And that's like my priority. And that's like, that's what I'm doing. And then Dennis joins in the confession.

Hey, what are you doing here, Dennis? So he's like, he's like, let me punch in. It's time for me to punch in. Okay, you're punched in. So basically, by the way, she's decided that she's not gonna be upset about Dennis and Drew anymore. Maybe because she decided, I'm just assuming that now she's gonna go after Angela instead of Drew.

I don't know, but she's decided to drop the whole thing. Yeah, nothing came after that. Nothing came of that storyline. So she's like, okay, I'm gonna try and fuck with somebody else now. So they're gonna get an au pair from South Africa and she's gonna come over. Now Now I cannot wait until this lady, we meet her and she's very sweet, very young, you know, and she's like, hello, I'm here to be au pair. And I was like, oh my God,

look at her now. And then imagine her in a couple seasons with a ball gown as a housewife, fuck Dennis, take over the show. I'm rooting for you, au pair, I'm rooting for you. I want her to go all the way. I want her to go the distance like Lisa Barlow. So meanwhile, Dennis doesn't even understand what an au pair is. He's like, what's an au pair?

Au pair? Au pair? Well, I don't even know what an au pair is. And she's like, the au pair is gonna stay with you at the house, she's gonna live there. He's like, wait, a young chick is just going to live in my house. And you're the one making this happen. Yeah. You know, so she comes over and, um,

they've gotten her a welcome basket and a balloons and a cake and she's like, Oh, okay. Cause she's yeah, we just want you to feel welcome. So yeah, it doesn't make me feel welcome. So. Yeah. It doesn't make me feel welcome if you say that. We want you to feel special. So we got you a cake. Now sit down and here's your hours. So Dennis is like, okay,

so what do you like to do when you're not working? Does it involve hot dogs? Because we all like to read. And I also have, I also have some au pair, two au pair friends that are here. They're Because, well, I like to read. And I also have, um, I also have some au pair, two au pair friends that are here. They're like, oh, that's cool. You have friends. Great. Um, so Kelly, it's like, wait a minute. I like that answer too. Cause what if she, they were like, Hey, what do you do when you're not working? She's like coke. How about you? Pete Slauson Hard drugs.

Peteus So, they sent her away. They sent Lauren away to train her. And she talks about how Dennis is an honorary house husband, but she's going to move on from this Drew thing because she just wants a good relationship with Dennis and Dennis needs to have a good relationship with peanut butter and peanut butter needs to have a good relationship with Phoebe. And if all this works, maybe Pilar will be happy. Pete Slauson Yeah. And then, and so, but Porsche is still going to roast him a little bit about filming with Drew. And he's like, I wasn't filming. I just, I came to a session, cameras just happened to be there, which is filming with Drew.

And then he said, but then he says, I respect how you feel. Drew's not even signed to me anymore. And now there's nothing else to talk about because you obviously scared her. So this was kind of like a casual and I feel like important detail that was glossed over. So Dennis and Drew are suddenly not working together anymore.

Maybe after she got, she signed with that major record, record label known as sign here for rev share plan. Maybe she dropped Dennis after that. Yeah, maybe. I don't know. I don't know that I believe it though. I don't believe it either. So then, um, Porsche was like, well, you guys need to take accountability. And, uh, and especially if she tried to sleep with you, cause that's what you said.

And he's like, what? I didn't say that. She goes, uh huh. Look. And he goes, please, I've never even been in front of this lady. And so Portia pulls out her phone and she's like, okay, well you said, well, all you had to do was say, yeah. So that means she tried fucking you.

He's like, uh, no, well, I'm not the one hitting that. She goes, who is then? He goes, not me. She's like, okay, so are you going to do a breakup song too, about your relationship? Whatever. I'm done with it. I'm done with it. Okay. Now we're friends, brother, right?

We're friends, right? And she tries to like shake his hand. He's like, I'm not going out like that. No, this is not shaking your hand. At 24, I lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me, and the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes, and politics. I would define reclaiming as to take back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again.

So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks, both recognizable and unrecognizable names, about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph. My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up. They connected with the people that I'm talking to and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful.

Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts. joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts. So now we go over to Britt and she's packing up her mom's house with her mom, her grandma and her sister Cher. So Britt's like, growing up in the eating household, my dad was like always the light

in the glue and I miss my family being close and I feel like ever since my dad's been gone, we haven't been as close. And back in my mom's house, it does bring back a bunch of memories." And she's just talking about how, you know, he built this house and whatever. And so this is like a special place. And now they're packing it all up. Yeah. And Cher's really upset about it. She's like, how could you move out of your mother? You're so selfish. This is my child at all. It's like, oh, God, Jesus. Oh, could you throw that rolling pin away, mother, this is my home.

Like, Sharon's doing the most for the cameras, you know? And they're teasing her and they're like, mom's ready to hoe now. And so, they're just kind of going through stuff. And then Britt talks about how Sharon, her mom are always at each other's neck, which is what is happening right now. Because Angela, she's like, how dare you? How dare you throw daddy's stuff away? And she goes, well, how dare your daddy leave me? And she goes, he left you because he died.

And she's like, exactly. He started it. So we're packing up this shit. The mom's like, because they're all, they're all, you know, Sharon and Britt are very upset, but the mom's like, I want to get out of this place. I don't want to live. Clearly she doesn't want to live in this place with all these memories, right?

She literally says, because now you guys can't come home, meaning I don't have to do it. She's like, every time something goes wrong with one of your lives, you move back in here, most likely Sharon, let's face it, because Cher is a Cher-er-ist. She's an emotional Cher-er-ist. And so the mom's like, I'm going to move into a place so tiny that nobody can come move in.

Okay, I'm old and I don't want to have to deal with your shit anymore. So they're fighting and they're bickering and they're going back and forth. And finally, Gladys, the grandmother, she has a cane and she's like, I'm the grandmother and you all have got to stop it. I love Gladys. She was like, I'm sick of all these people. Shut up and turn on Matlock.

Yeah, so then they FaceTimed their sister, Tierra. And Tierra does not even wanna be on the phone with these people. She's like, wow, wish I could be there today, but I do think about you guys. And she was like, even me? You even love me? Why don't you answer my calls then?

Because, Cher, you're a drain on literally everybody in this family. I'm sorry that I have to be, I'm sorry that some random on the internet has to tell you you're a brat and you're draining the fuck out of your family. Okay? That's why nobody wants to call you.

And that's why your mom is moving so you can stop moving in with her. Fix yourself. Yeah. And then Tiara is like, well, we all deal with grief differently, which is why I haven't been calling. She goes, I get it, but I've been dealing with grief a long time

and it's not fair. So then they're crying and Britt's like, okay Tiara, okay. It's not fair that she shot me out like this. So Britt's telling us about how, um, Cher really took her father's death the hardest and she's been really having a hard time and she's just not ready to move forward. And Tiara's like, okay, love you all. Oh, I think I'm breaking up. Okay. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Yeah. She's like, we have bad reception. It's like it's FaceTime. We can see you doing that. She's like, bye, I'm going down the stairs. We see you climbing. Grief, grief over here. Deal with some grief. Bye. She's like, I'm stuck behind a wall. I can no longer hear you. Must go. And so finally, grandmother Gladys goes, you know what? You have a good God upstairs. He takes care of everything. That's why you all have to stop fussing and acting like fools all the time.

Come on. Let's put on some Kathy bits. Yeah. And they're like, that's right. Grandma. She was like, can I move in with you, grandma? No, fuck no. No.

So then the Bailey queue. She's like, I usually do my Bailey Queues for the 4th of July, but now it's Juneteenth and it's national holiday. So now we're going to do it for Juneteenth. So Cynthia, it's raining. So she's like, oh, and I'm bringing a profit, by the way. So Britt's first there, because she's in the new cast, and that's what newbies always show up first. So then other people come and we meet Dr. Natasha, intuitive life strategist. I would love to know where she got her advanced degree from. And she's like, okay, all right.

In tuition university? Where the tuition is what you're actually learning. So, Dr. Natasha sits down on the bridge because she's like, this prophet is kind of, I won't, sassy is not the right word. It's kind of like, she's like your girlfriend. She's like, I'm a prophet, but I'm also your girlfriend. She's like, okay, it's you. So you've been choosing other people for like so long and now it's time to choose yourself, especially when it comes down to your business,

if that makes sense. And there's a new business venture too. I was like, about as vague of a prophecy as could be. And Britt's like, oh my God. She had my life in that moment. And she's starting a new business guys, because she's putting a pause on everything agency and insurance, probably because she's being investigated. I mean, canceled.

I mean, investigated for whatever. Jake from State Farm did not appreciate the rumors going around his brand. Yeah, she's like, not into dick pic insurance anymore. So now I'm doing my new business, which is of course, very naked. Yeah, she's very naked. I'm already very naked.

Like I could do that for free. Yeah, shapewear, she's gonna do shapewear, even though there's nothing in her bio that indicates that she would be like, that she's not, I'm not saying qualified, but like there's nothing in her bio that's like I have passing interest in fashion or shapewear, things like that. Although to be fair, same could be said for really so many people who go into shapewear. So I guess I can't really hold her feet to the fire too much. But she's doing the classic insurance to shapewear pivot.

And this is what's keeping her forward. I would like to see an original Real Housewives business, you know, I'm sick of the same old things like shapewear. I'm going to do some like wig pieces. I'm going to do candles. How about like phone mounts? Or like a phone charger. I don't know. Like Tupperware.

Tupperware would be a fun throwback. Or like why does everyone have to be an entrepreneur? You know? Phone cards. What about I've decided to focus on my new passion, which is I'm gonna to be a waitress at a nice restaurant. Sloth hunting.

Sloth hunting. I'm going to be a zookeeper. Yeah, something. I mean, give me something new. Fucking shapewear. Makeup line. Let me feel moisturized or do something new. I'm bored.

I feel like it's also so pigeonholing. Not that that's even a verb, but it's kind of like it kind of is like cementing this idea that if you're like a woman who wants to have a job or business, like you have to just slot yourself into some of these like feminine categories. And that's that. And I just feel like the world of employment and also entrepreneurship for women is so much bigger than Bravo presents. And it's just kind of like the same thing every single time. Well, it's just stuff that they can sell online to Housewives audiences, right? I think that's super important. Like you need to be able to talk about it on TV and have people order it.

Everyone's chasing this skinny girl thing. And they're hoping to get like... Dildo's is the best one. Candy's Dildo MLM is my favorite one because that's like unique, you know? How dare you when we live in a universe where Sonya's toaster oven is a thing. That never came to fruition though, so it doesn't count. But it was a great, but it was a disruptor.

It was. So you're saying like, what's my thing? Well, I'd make things in the toaster. I'm going to come out with a toaster of it. It was pretty good. That's usually what all these are. It's like, okay, I almost wonder, is there like a consult, is there like a business consultant that works with Bravo where they say, okay, we want to give you an entrepreneurial storyline

this season. Here are your options and whichever one you choose, we will connect you with someone who's going to help you make this come to fruition over the course of the season. I almost wonder if they do that because it's always the same shit. Can we get it? Like, how about someone's like, I want to open up a business that sells sailboats, you know, or like hot. Yeah, just anything, anything new. That's boring. So. So Dr. Natasha, sorry, Dr. Natasha, is saying, okay, Kelly, you need to focus on new beginnings, Kelly, everything new for you, right? Because, you know, you went through a bad depression after your marriage ended, right? Your marriage ended. Yeah, I know about that. I know about that. And what did he try to do with the car? He did that

to be vindictive. That's why he sold it. And she's like, oh, no one knew about him selling the G-Wagon he bought me for our 10-year wedding anniversary. Nobody knew that. Only Brit, you're a psychic. You're a G-Wagon psychic. Pete Slauson I know. What a specific use for psychic abilities. I have a prophecy, a prophecy that's more of a question. Why did he try to sell your G wagon? Well, you're supposed to answer that. You're the prophet. I think he took it back to the place

that you leased it from because he was no longer gonna be paying for that, is what I think. Because who pays for a G wagon outright? Nobody. Aren't those like a quarter of a million dollars? I'm not paying for that. You nuts.

By the way, did the prophet actually have any prophecies? The prophet was just basically flexing that she knew something about these people. And really she didn't even do that. She just sort of sprung a bunch of traps that they could fall into and divulge information to her. Well, yeah, and I like that she's like a psychic who knows about your finances.

She's like, Ronnie, you're behind on your gym membership that you never go to. Now, why did you switch from LA fitness to 24 hour fitness? I didn't tell anyone, I just did that this week. Ronnie, your credit score went down two points again this month. Are we gonna take care of this? Okay, let's make it one hundred mils.

Question, I noticed that you just refilled your Starbucks card, $20. Why not go a full 50? Just wondering. Honestly, how much is fucking Starbucks? I feel like I'm refilling that card every two days. It's 20, they're like, well, you're out of a cart. I just filled that up with $25.

What are you charging for this shit these days? My God, it's milk in a cup. It's all I have is chocolate milk. Well, I get a two pump mocha with no ice. So it's basically like chocolate milk for adults. I'm like, why is that over $50? I'm not doing that anymore. I'm making it from home now.

You can suck it. Okay, come up with that Starbucks psychic. The prophet has a question for you, Ronnie. Why do you do two pumps instead of one pump? It's like, wow, you're a very specific prophet. You really, you really home in on- It comes with six pumps. So that's my way of showing that I'm like making an effort. So I'm putting it out in the universe. By the way, I think this is just a note for all these coffee shops that like do pumps like Dunkin and Starbucks and others.

When you want wanna do modifications, could you at least put something in the app that shows what like the default pump level is? Because sometimes it'll be like, I wanna add like two pumps to something and then you go and it says it's three pumps and I'm like, so does that mean I wanna total of five pumps? Is that too much?

I'm always sort of unsure about the pump situation. And I wish they just- Oh yeah, you have to ask, that's something you have to know about. Yeah, I wish they would clarify like what, I need to like, I need to have like some pump regulation and some pump standardizing. That way I can know my adjustments. Yeah, well, I think that's a fair request.

I don't think you're gonna get it. No, I won't. Not in this economy. Not in this economy. With your tariffs and your nastiness. Might mind that for one damn cotton picking second, y'alls. So with that being said, we now move to Shamiah arriving. And Shamiah is like, first of all, she has a full, like, she has a whole, like, sort of, it's not like a necklace. I don't know what you would call that kind of like brass gold thing that sort of goes around the neck and around sort of the clavicle

But she is she has some African garb She has the the headdress and everything and she is like first of all you're not gonna tell me I'm invited to a Juneteenth Juneteenth barbecue, and I'm not gonna wear my African clothes. I mean do you know my husband is Kenyan? So she's in full dashiki mode and Cynthia's like, okay, Tosh, I want you to feel Angela's energy and give her some insights. So Dr. Natasha is basically like, okay, question. Why do you still have your blockbuster card? Wow. She really knew me. She knows me.

I think this, when was she wearing the big earrings? Was that when she was in the… Shamiah, at this moment right now, Shamiah had enormous earrings on. They're like cymbals. They're like drums. I mean, they're, well, they're not round, but they're gigantic. And then at one point she had one turned around and I was like, that's so embarrassing. I was like, are they ping pong paddles?

This is too much. And then what if somebody asks you something and you shake your head emphatically to deny it, you're gonna poke your goddamn eye out and then you're gonna be in the hospital again and then we're gonna have another scene of Shamia the doctor, okay? Shamia's earrings were like clean energy solutions.

I swear, like they were powering a turbine somewhere with the amount of times they were twirling and catching wind. So, um, anyway, Dr. Natasha is giving a prophecy to Angela and she's like, well, something that's going on in terms of an individual, and this could be a spouse. Um, y'all need a vacation or something. Cause like they got comfortable, they come from the comfort house to stop. Okay. And TMI, you know, us women, we get consumed with work and life and all that stuff. And like sometimes we lose our sexual commitment. And Angela's like, okay, so where's my phone? Let me go to Victoria's Secret real quick. Okay. And another thing, Victoria's Secret, they owe you a discount. You've been shopping there a lot. She's like, wow,

you know my shopping history. So then we go to Angela and she's like, well, let me see, you're too comfortable. I see something about Brussels sprouts, a kitchen's never cleaned, and you bought sick stamps from the post office last week." She's like, oh my God, that's really good. So, Angela's like, why? Let's listen. Of course there's issues in my marriage. We've been married for 10 years, and he's in his 60s

or something. So, yeah, do you want to have to do the helicopter every time you try and climb on top of someone? His love language is cleaning the kitchen. I'll take it. So then Dr. Natasha, she did so well with her G-Wagon strike. Like she hit gold with that one when she did the, why'd you sell your car? And then Kelly's like, oh my God, that happened. So she tries it a second time. Girl, don't go back there. You did it. Don't try it. She goes, okay, now who here has a Porsche? Am I right? A Porsche? Everyone's like, I don't have a Porsche. She's like, okay. And they're like, well, there is a Porsche in our group.

There's a Porsche. And so they're like, ha ha ha, oh my God, she gets Porsche. So then she tells Dr. Natasha 2025 is her money making year. And I don't think that means the music is successful. Because I don't think that means the music is successful. Cause I don't think music makes you money anymore, right? How do you make money from music? I think it's hard. And I think especially like, I think Shamia, I applaud Shamia deciding that she's going to give it

a full shot to become a pop star. But there are just certain rude aspects of the music industry. And one of them is that if you're like over, I don't know, 23, you're basically an old hag and you will not be accepted in music. And so I just think like she has an uphill battle. Yeah. But ain't all ain't all bill, uh, ain't all battles kind of uphill at some point,

being sometimes you got to just go up that hill if it's worth it. Maybe they should stop fighting battles on hills. I mean, find a flat surface, everyone. Make your lives easier, am I right? Avoid hills, fight only in the plains. So Dr. Natasha says to Shemia, as you said, she said, you know, 2025 is your money-making year. So Shemia responds by going,

what, I'm gonna make some money, money, money, money. So now Portia comes over and Angela's not gonna speak with Portia until they address the elephant in the room, which is Nashville, the place we just went to. It's like, okay, we know the elephant. So Portia's like, am I headed for a divorce? Oh no, everybody knows about me. Cause all you have to do is read the press. I'm in the press all the time.

And the prophets like, really, Portia, you're going to kind of step on my gig here. Okay, come on. It's called Yes, and okay, just go with the prophet thing. So then, um, Drew arrives and then Dr. Natasha is basically, uh, well, Kelly is like, well, Drew's an actress, so you have to be really careful with her because you don't know what you're gonna get. And she's like, oh, well, I'm gonna talk to Drew in private because I know she doesn't want to share. I'm like, Drew, Drew, like I said, she's an actress.

If she can take the stage, she will take it. Yeah, she's gonna take it. And then they're like, well, you know, Drew, I need to speak with Drew privately, guys, because Drew's extremely depressing. She would prefer that I do my end of this reading from a basement. Do you have a basement?

I can go down with you. She's feeling more comfortable. Just makes her feel more secure, yeah. And so, Portia's like, that girl's so extra. Yeah, because Drew's like, yeah, I don't wanna do my, I don't wanna do this in front of certain people. You know, I just wanna have some alone time. Oh gosh.

So, Portia's like, oh wow, it's like she wants to tell lies in front of everyone, but she wants to tell the truth in private, girl, just go ahead and get right in front of all of us. So, Kelly's asking Angela how she's feeling feeling because she hasn't seen her since Nashville. And Angela's like, you know, been living a good vibe. It should be noted by the way that Angela is fully fanning herself because once again, she's overheating. And then so Angela says she's been giving it living a good vibe and Brick goes, well, you receive what you give. Well, last time I checked Britt,

by the way, Angela gave a very good vibe to you at that whiskey tasting. And then you guys hugged, it seemed like everything was good. And then you immediately turned around and became a bitch to her yet again. Yeah, Britt's just, again, just trying to start something because she's on TV and it's kind of exhausting. It's like another new girl attempted a war. We already had last week's massive fail. So it's like, oh, god, Brit, here we go. So, she's like, yeah, you need a good five-star at home. And Angela's like, all right, well, let's talk about it then. So, Brit's like, well, I think the prophet might have been spot on. What

do you guys think about Charles, about her terrible marriage? And Angela's like, well, do you have something you need to tell me about something? And she goes, do you not read the words coming out of my mouth? Calm down, that big ass mouth, I should be able to. Oh, big mouth, it sounds like you need to use that mouth more often. Angela's like, oh, I do. Not as much as yours with the stretch marks around it though. So Britt stands up, she's like, show me. Andrew just goes, you got miles on your mouth. I'm married, Britt, you're a whore.

I just like that Angela goes from shading to alluding to just blatantly saying, yeah, you're a whore. saying, yeah, you're a whore. She's like, she's like, yeah, you've got you got miles on your mouth. You're using your mouth a lot. What I'm trying to say, you're a whore. You're a whore. You're just basically a whore. You see, you give a lot of fellatio whore. And so since it's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, not today. And birth like, well, maybe you need to be a whore in your bedroom and keep your man. Okay, you know, I don't love this again. It's like every time the man is accused

of having a baby or cheating, everyone's like, well, it's your fault, you didn't fuck him enough. Yeah. It's like, come on. It's old fashioned. Stop being gross. So then Drew is saying that she can't be with the group because she just has to protect her peace.

Okay. Yeah, whatever that means. And she's like, the ancestors are turning over. And Angela, Angela's like, you might need to revisit your marriage, Brit. Well, your husband hasn't even acknowledged that he's been married to you for the last 10 years. She goes, well, the world knows.

Like, the world knows about that baby. And Kelly's like, the world knows about that baby though. Kelly's like, the world knows about that baby though. Yeah, so Kelly's trying to come back up. Kelly, you've chosen the wrong side on this. And at least it looks like she figures that out soon, but it's hard to like Kelly as much because she's just so hard for the wrong side every time. So Shemeah is like, well, listen,

if someone said my husband had a side baby, I'd be excited. I wouldn't have to pay a surrogate. I'd be like, where's the baby? Put an air tag on the baby. That's my baby. Take the baby. It's my baby. So, um, well, so this is all very entertaining. Like I'm chuckling along because it's silly. I thought Angela's being really funny. I'm like, this is fun. I enjoy this. I'm really enjoying the season. Cindy is like, everyone, I know we're having a scene where we're being kind of spicy and shady and being kind of funny. Let's stop it all. It's time to do a quiz. I was like, Oh God, not questions.

Yep. It's time for a June 19th or Juneteenth quiz. So at least it wasn't never have I ever to be fair. Well, this made us miss that. This made me miss those games, you know, because this one was just like, it's not that it's not important, it's that this is a housewives party, okay? So- We're just talking about people being whores and mileage on mouths,

and then to go to like, you know, something educational. I mean, it was like, look, it was not a very serious moment. Everyone was laughing and still having fun, but it's kind of like, Cynthia, let the scene play out. Like, this is, you should have done this before the prophet, I feel like. Now, because now we're in the messy part of the episode. We don't have to stop everything and have like, you know, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter whether it's about Juneteenth or whatever. It's just like, you're having a

moment where you're sort of like throwing in like a structured scripted moment of like, we're going to play a game when there's already a good flow in the scene. Although it is kind of funny when Portia gets a question wrong and she goes, I have never been so loud and so wrong in my life. And then they flashback to 2013 when she thought there was a literal railroad underground. The O.C. And Cynthia's saying,

her grandfather is a civil rights hero. So then we go to eating time and Cynthia's like, okay, now I need to see Portia Williams and Angela Oakley in the tiny entrance room with two chairs. Okay, it's the profit room. We're gonna call it the profit room. So she's gonna try and broker peace. So she says, okay, I wanted to have space

for you guys to have a conversation. And so you guys talk. So Angela's saying, well, initially, when I invited Drew, I just wanted you guys to make up and I felt attacked. And she's like, well, she wasn't invited and you blew past that. And so now it's not even on Drew anymore. You know, you went toe to toe. Yeah. And so Angela's like, well, I don't know. I don't know what you're talking about, you know, with, with all that. And Angela is, they're basically just like hashing it out. They're kind of having like kind of a, it's not,

they're not really having a fight and they're not really having a make nice. They're just kind of like, well, I said this and you said that, but I said this and you said that. Well, I think cause they've already done this 5,000 times and that's a problem with this season. They're trying to pull a Beverly Hills where they have one thing happen and they fight about it all season

and this show just can't withstand that. We need fresh things. So they've already fought about this multiple times and now they're being made to fight about it again. And they're both just like, I don't agree with you. So let's just make up. So they agree to make up even though they still disagree with each other. So they both half ass apologize and then it's done.

So now, um, Porsche tells us it was a stupid comment about making, you know, the fucking Charles thing. And she's just like, it's, it's alcohol, you know, but how was I supposed to know a Dumbo was up there with her big old ears listening? But since she was, I'm sorry. So Cynthia's like, okay, all right, okay. So we've done that. All right, and now Shamia, you and Angela can speak now.

And Shamia was like, let's do it. I was like, I didn't know that Shamia and Angela even had an issue, but I guess they do, so fine. So now it's like time for sit down number two with Angela in the prophet room. Yes, so now Shamia is like, well, I just wanted some closure on the text that you sent me because I don't even know

why I made you feel some sort of way. And then I get 10 pages of words and she's like, well, your best friend says to you, I should fuck her husband. I was looking to you as a married woman to check her. And she's like, oh, but you guys were fighting and she was talking shit. I'm not saying it's okay, but it's not my fight. So why are you talking to me? Okay. But then why do you need a private conversation about it as well about that? Right. Right. And she's like, but still she's like, I don't know, I'm just sort of, I was just like, kicking with everybody, you know, I was laughing and funny. And I think, you know, I think laughter is healing. You know what else is healing? Singing. I mean, hell, I laughed at my uncle's funeral because they buried him looking like a pastor and he never

stepped in front of a church, a foot in the church. And just like, I don't really know what's going on here. But like, look, I don't think this conversation is necessary because it's going to lend itself to something. It's just like, okay. And I think it's fair to say like, this girl was being an asshole to me, and you're supposed to be my friend. And you just sat out there laughing at all these jokes about my husband having a baby and her fucking my husband. Like, it would have been nice to stand up for me instead of just being like, well, that's just Portia. I think that that's kind of uncool, but whatever.

I mean, I don't know why anybody would expect Shumia to do anything but stand up for Portia at this point. That's how she got on here. Yeah, so basically Shumia is like, yeah, they're both kind of ended in a place of like, well, we'll just agree to disagree. I feel like we should be mad at each other, but I also don't understand why we're, why we're sitting here having this conversation

the first place. Let's just go back and enjoy the rest of Juneteenth, whatever we can. Let's see what the prophet has to say for ourselves. So like we absolutely, so then they go back in and the party continues and it's just like, Angela, don't forget to pay your, your Instacart yearly membership. You're going to have to pay for delivery. She's like, all right, profit. Angela, are you aware that you included a Showtime add on to your Paramount Plus membership? That brings us to the end of Real Housewives of Atlanta. Join us over on Patreon for video

recaps and bonus episodes. Last week we did a below deck trailer trash, so before that we did a next gen NYC trailer trash. This week we'll probably do a Real Housewives of Miami preview. So that's all fun and games go over there. Also come to our shows in Texas this week. We will be recapping Summer House in Austin. And in Dallas, we will be doing real Vanderpump rules, season five, episode six, or season six, episode five, called Sex, Lies and Videotape. And then an audio tape, audio tape, right?

And then in Vegas, we're gonna be the following week. And then, um, in Vegas, we're going to be the following week. And then we added shows in Los Angeles and Seattle in June. And that will finish us up for the tour. So go to watch what crappens.com for ticket links and all of that good stuff. And we'll talk to you next time. Y'all's is. Bye. Watch what crap ends would like to thank its premium sponsors.

Ain't no thing like Alison King. It's always a party on Alison Block. Our way is the Amber way. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. She can run my country. It's Angie McGovern. It's always automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clap. Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela! Etchles! We never miss her call, it's Diane Call!

Erin McNicholas! She don't miss no trick-a-lis! Hava Nagila Webber! You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones! I go, you go, we all go for Hugo! Jamie! She has no less name-y! She's our kind of mess, it's Jennifer Messer!

Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch! She's our favorite streamer Caroline Peacock. Kristin the Piston Anderson. Get a B in your bonnet with Lacey B. Rigging the funk it's Leslie Plunkett. She gets a name from us it's Lindsey D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy it's Maisie McHenry. We love her on the rocks it's Melissa Cox. Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the Berg. This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian. I love a ya, Olivia Williamson.

Tastier than Flanderson, it's Rachel Manderson. She sure is swell, it's Raquel. Yes we canna, it's Sedana. Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge. Bay Area Betches Betches and our super premium sponsors She's VVIP. It's Amanda V can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin Somebody get us 10 CCs of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neil. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper.

Can't have a meal without the Emily sides. Let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs. Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland. It's our queen, it's Queen La'ifa. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. Know your worth with Jason Kerr. Hail the cork master, the master of the cork, Jennifer Corcoran.

We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. She's a little bit loony. Junie, my favorite Murdo. Karen McMurdo. She gets an A, it's Kelly B. We love him madly, it's Kyle Pod Shadley. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron.

She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthi. Always killing it, it's Lola Alcolani. The incredible, edible Matthews Sisters. She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose. We're on the floor with Molly Dorsett. There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud. She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke. Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony. Let's take off with Tamla Plain. It's always a good time when you're wasting time with Bravo. She ain't no shrinking Violet Coutar. We love you guys. If you like Watch What Crappens, you can listen ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself

by filling out a short survey at wondery.com slash survey.