Watch What Crappens - #2860 Love Hotel 0105 Part Two: Santa’s Back in Town w/ Guest Amy Phillips
Episode Date: May 26, 2025This is part 2 of 2The hilarious and charming Amy Phillips (@meetamyphillips) of the Drama, Darling Podcast joins Ronnie to recap Love Hotel while Ben is away, and the woman’s impressions a...re ON POINT, people! Ralph is still moan kissing, Santa is back in town, and new men show up to make the women choose. Will Shannon break down? Will Earl eat a vegetable? And will Lu bang someone? To watch this as a video recap, listen to our Trailer Trash and Road Trip bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Tickets for our final Mounting Hysteria Tour in Seattle June 12 and LA June 19 are now on sale at watchwhatcrappens.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Every big moment starts with a big dream.
But what happens when that big dream turns out to be a big flop?
From Wondry and Atwill Media, I'm Misha Brown, and this is the Big Flop. Every week, comedians join me to chronicle the biggest flubs,
fails, and blunders of all time, like Quibi.
It's kind of like when you give yourself your own nickname
and you try to, like, get other people to do it.
And the 2019 movie adaptation of Cats.
Like, if I'm watching the dancing
and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground,
there's something wrong with the movie.
Find out what happens when massive hype turns watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground, there's something wrong with the movie.
Find out what happens when massive hype turns into major fiasco. Enjoy The Big Flop on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts.
You can listen to The Big Flop early and ad-free on Wondery Plus. Get started with your free trial at Wondery.com slash plus. What happens when this so much that happens? Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Happens.
This is part two of a two part recap.
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I didn't hear part one guys.
It's because we put out a lot of recaps.
Go back and listen to part one.
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It's before this one.
Bye.
Enjoy the show.
So this is where Shannon's gone. oh my god, she has to pick
Wally. She has to pick Wally. Please pick Wally. That was crazy. That was like, is this a presidential
election? Like, what is happening? What is happening? Ohio's in. Ohio's in. Kalamazoo.
Ohio's in, Ohio's in.
Kalamazoo.
That was amazing though. I did love it.
I'm with her.
So, uh,
so she's telling Wale,
you know, you know, you want
children in 30 days and I don't
know if I can do that.
He's like, wait a minute.
But, you know, you know, Ralph,
you're just so old and I don't
know, I can't tell if you just farted
or not.
Let's get married.
And Wale is like, what the fuck, man?
How is this possible?
Yeah.
So she dumps Wale and then we get the White Lotus music, which is crazy.
It's getting crazier every week.
At this point, it's just like whoop, whoop, whoop.
I don't watch White Lotus, I'm sorry. So I didn't get it.
So the music is like, like you hear like monkey sounds. But now they're getting too crazy with their synthesizer. Where now it's just going like, oey, oey, oey. If you're going to rip off the music, do it right, you guys.
It's like, what sound does a penguin make? Put it in there. So, a white lotus undulating is in the
notes. So, Ashley and Ralph are hugging and he's into it.
He kisses her hand like, ugh.
I know.
Ugh.
Beauty and the Beast.
Ugh.
Ugh.
He's so growly.
Ugh.
It's like not a petting zoo, Lord.
Sane.
So Ashley's like, well, I'm working on my daddy issues and I'm trying not to go down
the same path, but Ralph does have a different accent than Michael, so I'm learning.
They get an extra key. Who's going to get the extra key? So the women huddle to talk
about it. And Shannon's like, oh my God, I just, I feel horrible. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. Well, except Earl.
I'll hurt Earl's feelings. He'll be back.
I'm going to get another Earl, a younger Earl, just because I think Earl will pass soon.
And it will be better for him if he has another man that's like him, just younger.
It'll be great.
I don't want to be too shocked when Earl's heart blockage takes him.
I've got a stinted Earl who eats broccoli waiting in the wings.
That's terrible.
And Luann's like, you want it? you think any of us want to hurt their feelings?
Come on, Shannon.
I like that Luanne is like five seconds away from slapping Shannon at every moment.
She does.
She really does.
She really gets in, she wants to get in the mud pit.
I mean, if they had a mud pit for these ladies, Luanne would be the first one in there and
she'd just be kicking the shit out of them all.
She's ready to smack her.
I love it. And Ashley says, but I'm going to keep the key to while they're, and Luanne will be the first one in there and she's ready to smack her. I love it.
And Ashley says, but I'm going to keep the key to while they're cheating.
And Luanne goes, why does Ashley get the key?
She's ready to fight for the extra key.
As she should.
That's what should happen on Love Hotel.
They should be fighting over keys.
Yeah, Luanne's actually going to put the keys to use.
So she's like, why give it to these people?
What, what is she going to find another child?
Yeah.
I want the, I want the key.
She's going to find another child.
Give it to Shannon.
She'll find another child.
Give it to Ashley.
She'll just date another senior citizen.
Give me the key.
I'll fuck them all.
All of them.
Every last one of them.
No.
All right. Ladies. Now's the moment of them. Every last one of them. No.
All right, ladies.
Now's the moment of truth.
Who have you chosen to give your hell key to?
Hell key.
To all of the men who are about to be offered a key, stay away. Trying to warn them. So Ashley has decided to give the key to Wale everybody. Wale is
getting the Earl treatment. This man is not loving being second best all the time. And
he pretty much tells her at the bar, he's like, what is with the games? You kicked me
off and you bring me back and you picked Ralph, Why are you talking to me? And she's like,
but I could be in love with you. That was a real left turn, Ashley, a real left turn.
Yeah. It's like, go talk to the old person. I'm going to bed.
Yeah. Honestly, I really thought that he was going to be like, you know what?
I don't want to be anyone's second choice.
I'm going to check out on my own.
Thank you.
But he did not.
He's gonna take the free hotel night.
Yeah, he wants to stay.
I think he knows if he checks out,
he's gonna be sleeping on the beach.
So he's like, I will take the air conditioning
for one last night.
Absolutely.
You nasty, nasty person.
So Shanna's like, well, you know,
I haven't had a lot of feelings of comfort in my
relationships, but girls comfortable. There's a whole new pair of jogging pants, smells, but
I still put them on every day. So I guess I'll marry my jogging pants.
Yeah, just go to sneeze like a snuggie from the early aughts. Just throw on that snuggie.
Just shine with me.
So let's see here.
Ashley and Ralph.
Ralph, she's gonna test drive Ralph.
Let's see how this goes.
Wow.
That was definitely, definitely a shocker.
I mean, not that much of a shocker,
but the second he got up to that room,
he lost his moves.
He was just like a statue.
He wanted something.
And I love the fact that she was like,
I have my period, sorry.
Yeah, I think he thought this was gonna be bone in time.
I think she thought it was gonna be bone in in time. I think she thought it was going to be bone in time too.
And then we find out later it's because his kiss was terrible.
But I don't know how she's shocked by it.
I mean, his kiss was disgusting the first time.
It just looked wet.
Like you could feel the wetness and the weird lip movement and the...
Yeah, he must not have delivered that what was happening fully until this moment.
So, so yeah, she's like, I got my period today.
And he's like, are you Jabba the Hutt?
Like what is with these noises?
The production probably was like amping up those growls and doubling them up.
You know, you know how they do.
It's like a creature in Lost.
You're like, what is it?
They never tell you.
Yeah.
It's like, I've watched this for seven episodes.
Now we know.
So Ashley and Gisele have this like girls talk where they're
pretending to give a shit about any of these people, which is so funny.
And Gisele's like, what's going on, girl?
And Ashley's like, oh my gosh, he didn't make my, his kiss was gross.
It didn't make my, my fanny flutter.
Or whatever.
And she's like, oh my God.
But I could be in love with Wally.
And she's like, oh my God, I'm going to cry.
Who would talk like that?
Who are you?
Who is this Giselle?
That was weird, that was weird.
That was very weird.
That was weird.
Because like she famously doesn't have too much emotion.
You know what I mean?
So for her to be like, I'm going to cry.
It says a lot.
And then for her to all of a sudden do like a baby voice was odd.
But also, but also she didn't drop down into a baby octave.
She just said it like, it was- I'm going to cry.
Weird.
It should have been like, oh, I'm going to cry.
If you're going to go there, go full in.
You can't go halfway on a baby voice.
Yeah, you gotta commit to that.
And then Ashley's like, well, you know,
I don't really know about him,
but I'll flow coast to town all the time when I need her.
I love her.
I just use her all the time.
I love that.
That was like, this is what, it's true.
That's what the ladies do.
And I loved it.
I loved every second of it.
Good for Ashley.
So then we go to Giselle.
Oh no, we're still in Giselle now.
We can fast forward.
Fast forward.
So then a beach picnic is being set up
and we see the new line of suitors.
And this is where Joel is next to them in a Speedo
for no reason really.
I didn't, I felt uncomfortable.
He looks great.
He looked great.
I just wasn't sure.
I thought, are we all gonna get into swimsuits in a second?
Cause there's gonna be a challenge.
Yeah.
You know?
I don't…
It didn't…
It was a complete non-sequitur.
I feel like they cut something out.
Yeah, I just felt uncomfortable.
Because you know, it's like when someone's in a Speedo and everyone's at…
Everyone's in a swimsuit.
It's one thing.
But when you're…
When there's just one person in the Speedo, it's…
I don't know.
I felt uncomfortable.
I was like, get him a pashmina for crying. It's just embarrassing.
But he looks hot.
So then he's like, welcome to the dating pool.
I was like, you can't stand there in a Speedo
and talk like that.
Like you have to at least have some energy.
You've got a Speedo on.
Yeah, let's get it.
Let's get it going.
Like, hey ladies, check this out.
Like, let's go, I'm ready to party.
Yeah, like look at me.
I've got a margarita, I'm a speedo, ladies.
But he's like, hi, ladies.
Welcome back to the page.
Every scene I'm like, oh, did the Shannon thing
just happen, because he looks pissed, or, you know.
I know.
So he's like, standing in front of me
are six incredible new bachelors.
Only three keys, Ashley verse.
I'm gonna say Ashley verse again.
Is Ashley gonna grow her universe some more
in the Ashley verse?
Why do you keep calling me Ashley verse?
I get it, I get it, I get it, we all get it.
We all get it, okay.
Just please save Wally.
So who will they save?
And he's like, and we've got someone
who got away a little too early,
so I decided to bring the star of the season back.
This guy who looks like Santa Claus, it's Mark.
And Mark comes back, he's like, hi everybody, we Mark.
Crawling over the rocks, like a gnome under a bridge or I don't know what under
what's lives under bridges, but just something trolls. Thank you
trolls like a troll crawling over the rocks and like an
Aladdin outfit. It was so it was like a jump scare.
And the man's like, Oh, it's Mark. Mark is back. Wow.
He goes, I'm back.
So he jumps over the couch but misses it.
Yeah, there's that.
That's right.
Thanks guys for leaving that in for Mark.
So the man's like, Mark, get over here.
All right, you've got one chance.
He's like, all right, I'm coming.
I mean, look at him.
He looks just like Jesus.
Why do you keep saying that?
You know Jesus died when he was 30, right? Do you mean Moses? I don't know my Bible, darling. The royal Bible
is different than that, you know, when I traveled. All the Bibles are different when I come from,
darling. It's different in Switzerland, all right? Learn to ski.
where I come from, darling. It's different in Switzerland, all right? Learn to ski.
Only Americans killed Jesus off in their Bible so young. God, you and your school violence, Jesus.
It's not Matthew, language, you know? Remember
when she was talking to Adam and she was like, I mean, Shannon is the one you want, no?
No. No?
I mean, how do you say, how do you say, how did Joel say it? This is your last shot, no?
You know English, Luanne.
You are fluent, madam. Stop lying. So she's like, Mark, get over here. All right, Mark,
listen, I tried to save you. He's like, you did not, you sent me home.
She's like, no, I didn't. Well, I mean, I did send you home, but then I had the option to save a
person. So I said, the Jesus one. And you know, you came back, you still didn't fuck me, Mark. So
what do I got to do? I mean, where's the second coming? Get it,
Turling. Where's the first?
What kind of Easter are you? I'm going, my egg opened, drooling, okay.
He's like, oh, well, I mean, all right, just what are you going to come on? I'm standing
right in front of you. I'm half naked. You look like Jesus Christ superstar. What am I? I'm a
turkey. I'm done. Stick it in me. Find out. Find out.
I mean, it's like, really? She goes, oh, Jesus Christ, I'm going to the bathroom.
I can't.
Please, someone get this impotent motherfucker
off the beach, all right?
He's wasted my time.
She's done with him
because he didn't stick his tongue down her throat.
Good for her.
What is he doing?
Wasted time.
So she's already over him.
So then we go to meet the new man.
Luanne introduces herself to Mitch, a retired psychotherapist from Sacramento.
Oh, good note.
Yeah.
Ashley meets Calvin, a 30 year old boxer and chef from LA, California.
No.
No.
Yeah, what?
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At 24, I lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me.
And the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives,
callous jokes, and politics.
I would define reclaiming as to take back what was yours.
Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again.
So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks, both recognizable and unrecognizable
names, about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph. My hope is that people will
finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up. They connected with
the people that I'm talking to
and leave with maybe some nuggets
that help them feel a little more hopeful.
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Every big moment starts with a big dream.
But what happens when that big dream turns out to be a big flop?
From Wondery and Atwell Media, I'm Misha Brown, and this is The Big Flop.
Every week, comedians join me to chronicle the biggest flubs,
fails, and blunders of
all time like Quibi.
It's kind of like when you give yourself your own nickname and you try to get other
people to do it.
And the 2019 movie adaptation of Cats.
Like if I'm watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground,
there's something wrong with the movie.
Find out what happens when massive hype turns into major fiasco.
Enjoy the big flop on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts.
You can listen to the big flop early and ad free on Wondery Plus.
Get started with your free trial at Wondery.com slash plus.
I don't want to eat your violent food.
Violent food.
You're right.
You know, he's just taking that.
He's pulverizing all of his needs.
Just all of them, you know, too much.
I asked for a tossed salad, not a pummeled salad.
What is wrong with this salad?
The fucking romaine.
I take it back.
I don't want a man who eats veggies. I take it back. I take it back. I don't want a man who eats veggies. I take it back. Eat
vegetables. Don't abuse them. And Calvin's hot as hell. Of course. Boxer chef. I mean,
hello. And he's like, born in London, but raised in Jersey. I mean, that's hot. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
And accent, well, he doesn't have it,
but could have an accent when he gets mad,
but also goes to the gym a lot, Jersey.
Yeah, we haven't heard him long enough
to hear the nuances of the voice and the accent.
Yeah, yeah, but he's cute.
And then Shannon meets a guy named Theo,
who's a dentist and a surgeon,
which is always a mistake to tell people at parties because every time they're like, oh, well, all of my teeth.
Well, it turns out I've had multiple root canals.
And so I have an appointment scheduled to get all the root canal pulled because there
are dead matter in my mouth.
Apparently, I'm full of dead matter.
You want to feel? I'll say ah and then you look and you'll see like each tooth if
you open it up is like a little coffin and inside is just ashes like just just black roots you'll
see I mean where the roots used to be is just black. Tunnels. My mouth is basically what is filled with what we're now
calling Earl's.
Educated.
Do you need me Shannon? Do you need me Shannon?
Over here Shannon. I know.
Do you need me?
Stay RT is still fine. You stay right over there.
So feels like well, you definitely need to come see me.
Do not want to make out with this person.
Come see me. My office. Not over at the fire pit ladies.
Giselle says there's some cutie pies. Um, not for me, but there's some cutie pies.
For people with no standards, there are plenty of men here.
So Luanne's still trying to get Mark to make out with her
and just leaves.
And then Giselle is talking to Theo,
the oral surgeon from New York and Brian.
And so this is where they're telling her
that they won't even give them hotel rooms.
That was so funny.
Which is really funny.
I loved it.
So low-budge.
It is, it's so great.
They're gonna move them on to like,
when they get kicked out,
they're not even gonna be able to stay at that hotel,
they're gonna put them down the road,
courtyard.
Yes.
Just anything.
So they talk about marriage and Theo's like, yeah, I was married for 20 years.
Both my kids are with me full time because they wanted to be with me.
It shows me.
I was like, whoa, whoa.
Theo, I'm getting dark, dark vibes from Theo.
Yeah.
Say no to Theo.
Yeah.
Who says that?
Like someone who killed his wife.
I'm sorry.
Allegedly, allegedly, allegedly.
What kind of impression are you trying to get?
That was like, yeah, well, I was married by my wife's a fucking pig.
I mean, seriously, right?
Right.
That was shocking and disturbing. And terrible die job.
Terrible die job as well.
So yeah, I say no to this guy.
And he's like, yeah, people just want me
because I'm a doctor.
It's hard to find someone who's like genuine
and nice in New York.
Someone will hear you're a doctor or surgeon
and they're thinking more what you could do for them.
I mean, look at dead matter mouth over there.
Dead matter mouth.
Oh good yikes.
Perfect example.
Don't know about that guys.
So Calvin is asked by Ashley if he wants children
and he's like, oh, a hundred percent.
I mean, if it happens, I mean, if that happens
I would be absolutely blessed.
Absolutely blessed.
Blessed.
I don't believe you, sir.
No.
If that happens.
He's just the kind of guy that like,
is gonna say whatever, he's not gonna have a stance.
He's just gonna be like, sure,
whatever life throws my way, I go with it.
Yeah, he's like a TV fuck boy,
don't you think, like a bachelor kind of guy?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
He applies.
And then Shanna is talking to all these guys
and she's just not into anybody.
She's like, so, well, I'm gonna look kind of to the side
and purse my lips a bit while I ask you these questions,
but what are your interests?
Do you play sports?
Okay, gross, you play sports?
That's disgusting. Right. Um, what are your interests? You play sports. Okay, gross. You play sports.
That's disgusting.
Right.
You went to a school where?
In Massachusetts.
I cannot with the East Coast.
I grew up on boats, but not on the East Coast.
Not there.
Inferior boats.
Massachusetts.
I don't even know if it was Massachusetts.
Who knows?
I got Karen Reed on my mind.
You know what I mean?
I'm an executive for a tech firm.
Oh, that is disgusting.
Okay.
She threw up in her mouth.
Tech.
Tech?
Oh, I took a selfie.
Want to see my bloody face?
Here.
I took this and I don't remember taking it, but I'm showing everyone here.
So I wanted to remember this day because I was with the man who pretended he didn't hear
this happening right down the road from him.
And so it's been a year and two days and and I would like to celebrate the year and two days
by taking a selfie.
Could you just pour this ketchup on my face?
I want people to see how much better I look covered
in ketchup a year and two days later.
Controversial opinion.
Shannon looks really good with the blood on her face.
And I think she thinks she looks hot too.
She just looks good.
Well yeah, you're gonna use a hot picture no matter what.
You can be covered in blood,
but if it's a good selfie angle, you're gonna use it.
It's a good selfie,
and she kinda looks a little sexy.
She's trying it out.
Did you just do this for you?
Did this do anything for you?
It's like Carrie meets Orange County?
I don't know.
I'm thinking of using this as my new passport photo.
She brings it out everywhere.
Fucking Shannon.
Oh my God, this lady's so crazy.
They need to just have every season with Shannon because she kills me.
Watching her interact with people is so funny to me.
She talks to the younger guy.
There's a younger guy named Scott who's 38.
He's a software tech salesman.
And I think he's so cute.
I mean, I really like a basic Midwestern looking,
just nothing of a guy.
Have you seen my husband?
I mean, he is right in my alley.
Your husband's hot.
Thank you.
Basic Midwest guy.
And like, so, and I liked his joke with Ashley
where he was like, I had this set up.
And then everybody can do that.
Everyone can make that joke about how something was set up,
you know?
But what he did, which I loved was he goes, thanks, Bill.
He personalized it, you know, I mean, I thought that was a great little, I was like, that's
actually funny.
Yeah.
He's like taking dad jokes, but he's making them his own.
There you go.
That's a way to do and his delivery was dry enough to where it wasn't that cheesy.
So I liked him and he was shocked when he was told that he had to leave.
And I was bummed.
I was shocked that he had to leave too.
But I mean, look at all the hotties over there.
I mean, I guess we shouldn't be so shocked.
Competition.
I thought he was hot.
And Shanna's like, oh, you are very young.
Wow. You are stem Wow, you are.
Stem cells about to be injected into my body.
Can we get somebody over here?
Neck tight, face tight.
I was at a housewarming party yesterday and someone had a little girl and I was like,
oh, hi, so nice to meet you.
And she's like, great.
She said, oh, thanks, you know, whatever.
And she's telling me about the kid.
And I was like, you've probably got great stem cells.
And her mom was like, uh.
She like, she backed the kid away.
I was like, I'm just kidding.
Forget I can't joke like that with people I don't know.
And also we're in LA.
And also I wasn't really joking.
She should have gotten it even more so. Hello. Weird. Weird.
Well, you would think so. I shouldn't have been holding the syringe in my hand. I think
that was taking it a little too far. I think it was too far. Okay, fair enough.
No. So she's like, wow, you're young. And he's like, oh, I'm a little too old for you, probably.
Okay. No, you, you, you, you, you, you are very young.
I'm just, I just look young with ketchup.
And he's like, no, I'm 38.
She goes, well, I'm 27 on the inside.
No, you're not.
No.
You're really not.
I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I,ans. Wait, who does she play?
Wait, what is it USC?
Who are they again?
University of spoiled children?
I don't care.
How dare you.
How?
How dare you.
No, no, no Kelly.
No Kelly.
Kelly, Kelly, Kelly.
You're stupid.
You're stupid.
You're stupid. You're stupid'm gonna get Kelly on Love Island.
I hate all of you!
Love Island.
Yeah.
Yeah, get her on Love Island, not Love Hotel.
A new bombshell, a new bombshell in the casa, fuck off!
Yo, this bitch!
God!
You're coupled up with him?
I was gonna pick him!
I pick him first, I didn't do this to me!
I didn't call Rick!
That would be amazing. That would be amazing.
I didn't warn you I was keeping you here for five hours, did I? So let's see.
So Theo talks to Giselle, you know, they're making small talk and Giselle mentions that
he likes doing crazy things like going to Spain and running with the bulls.
And Giselle just hears like frequent flyer miles.
She's like, that's hot.
She's like, oh my God, Delta one.
Like we get to go in the Delta. What do you call it? I don't know.
Up in the Delta one, whatever that's called.
She's like, all I hear is boarding group one.
Scott talks to Ash, you know, they're making small talk,
but nothing really bangs with these guys.
Nothing really connects with the guys. And so Ashley, especially Calvin's really overconfident
and he comes over and tries to break up her. She's talking to some dude and Calvin comes over. He's
like, Ashley, I'd like to steal you. We're going to make s'mores. And the guy's like, I'm talking
to her. I'll make s'mores with you. He's like, no, it's just for me and Ashley. So he's very like bachelor trained.
Very.
Ashley does not want that. So yeah, she gets rid of him.
This guy looks shocked when he was dumped.
Very, very. I kind of, I mean, I didn't feel bad, but I did notice.
I didn't feel bad. I actually liked that he was dumped and he was so shocked and he got dumped for like
a lot of old guys.
I think he was like, oh my God, like hot people can't compute.
You just see it frying in his head.
Scramble, scramble.
And the tech guy's like, I can help you with that.
I've got some tech company, just some out of country number. I'm not good.
I'm not good.
I'm not good.
I'm not good.
I'm not good.
Nuts us at all.
I'm not good.
I'm not good.
I'm not good.
So let's see, who do they end up keeping here?
So I think Luan keeps Mark just to be nice, right?
It's like, well, they flew him in again.
So I'll keep him.
Mitch?
Oh yeah, she keeps Mitch because he wants to travel
all over the world.
All. Right?
He wants to travel all over the world.
Yeah. Yeah.
So she keeps Mitch and Mitch takes a big swig.
He's like, yeah.
And her guy's upset.
And there was one part, was it here?
There was one part where that guy's like,
well, hey, I'm just telling the guys
that Luanne's my boyfriend.
She's like, no, I'm not your girlfriend yet.
You better slow down.
I said, but yeah, I feel like I'm a girl.
No, no.
She got him, she got him like corralled very quickly.
I loved it.
And Mark's like, wait a minute,
you guys are girlfriend and boyfriend?
And she goes, yeah, we wrote a song together.
All right, hit it.
Hit it, boys.
And like, he's going, love hotel.
And she's like, love hotel.
Love hotel.
Love hotel.
Luanne, you can't even find the key to love hotel?
It's got two notes.
The key.
Get it.
Wait, how about when they went up to the room and she's like,
do you want to see my other hats?
And then she got and then she puts the little towel over the camera.
Yeah, so don't worry, they can't follow me in here.
And so they go, he's like, I don't want to get caught with my pants down.
She's don't worry, they can't see. There's. And so they go, he's like, I don't want to get caught with my pants down. She's, don't worry, they can't see.
There's a camera right on the door that's looking at them.
So yeah, she, she eventually covers it.
Does the deed.
That's great.
The Love Hotel composer.
Good for her.
Yeah.
So she got a little, so that was nice.
That was fair.
It was nice.
Yeah.
And then otherwise I think it mostly stayed the same, right?
Yeah.
Ashley got, wait, Scott and Calvin,
I feel like she had them both stay,
Luann gave Mitch the key, Giselle,
Theo, and then Shannon, Mark.
Is that right?
Oh yeah, cause Shannon got to keep another one.
So she kept Mark, is that right? I think, cause Shannon got to keep another one. So she kept Mark.
Is that right?
I think, or is it Ashley got to,
why do I have Scott and Calvin?
I literally have this written down.
Sorry Ben.
I fast forwarded through so fast.
At the end we're like, oh I think it's fine.
I don't really care.
Some people stayed.
Some people went, you know, we'll find out next week.
Some old guy got laid. Yeah. What do you want me to tell you? That's pretty people went, you know, we'll find out next week. Some old guy got laid.
What do you want me to tell you?
That's pretty much it, you know?
Yeah, but I think Ashley got rid of Calvin.
I know that because I remember the look of horror.
Oh, she did get rid of Calvin.
Yeah, that's right.
Because I remember the look of horror on his face when he got kicked off.
And then she has a talk with Wale and she's like, I don't know if I can build a life that
you deserve.
And he says, well, they always argue,
but they don't know why.
And it's kind of him calling her
on her bullshit all the time.
Ben sees it more as him being like,
kind of an asshole and argumentative,
which I think he is, I think he is argumentative.
Like I don't disagree.
But also I think he's seeing through Ashley's bullshit
cause she's full of it.
Ashley's constantly telling this guy stuff.
And he's like, well, what does that mean Ashley?
You know, one minute, like you're asking me
if I want babies like you want babies,
now you're upset that I want babies.
Like, what is it?
What are you trying to say Ashley?
And she's like, no, I don't like that you're saying that.
He's like, but why are we arguing?
She's like, but you're arguing.
But I need to stay on the show
because I have to make it interesting
because I have a boyfriend back home.
So I'm just trying.
Yeah. And he's like, well, this is my first show.
Give me a chance to stay on it.
I'm going to have some lines.
I'm trying to build a life too.
Jesus.
He is very funny in his confessionals.
He's really funny.
I really like Wale.
Yeah.
I mean, he's a little red flaggy when they talk.
You know, I do see that, but you know, I don't know.
He's great for TV.
Yeah, so I'm glad he's staying.
But then he says things like this, which disappoint me.
He goes, you know, I don't know what's going on with Ashley.
Ashley is like a PlayStation controller.
She just plays games.
Weak, weak, weak.
A PlayStation controller doesn't play games, humans play.
Thank you.
The controller is just the vessel.
Instrument.
The instrument that we use.
How dare you?
How dare you get that wrong?
How dare you?
Uh.
So we get one final argument with Ashley and Wale
and she walks off and he just stares into the fire.
And that's it.
That's Love Hotel, y'all.
It's so good.
It is watching the show with Luan play her game,
run her game is absolutely fascinating.
And I love it.
It is, I agree.
And just all the casting, I think,
because I think Ashley was last minute,
I heard from somewhere, I don't remember who,
but no one, I'm probably making it up.
But Ashley, it was supposed to be Brynn from New York
and then all this stuff happened from New York
and then they recast it and so she was like the new cast,
the young person that they cast.
Whoa, I forgot about that. And I actually think that works out perfect.
I think she's great.
Even if she has a boy, I don't care if it's fake.
I don't care either.
I'm used to Bachelor, that shit's all fake.
So I don't care that it's fake.
And I think her energy with Giselle is really good on it.
I like that there's girlfriends in it.
I think Shannon and Lou Anna Hilaris,
I even love Giselle in it.
I love it too.
I love her. Yeah. And I'm not always a love Giselle in it. I love it too. I love her.
Yeah.
And I'm not always a huge Giselle stan,
but I love her in this.
She's fantastic.
She's very grounding in it, you know, for everybody.
Everyone has, everyone is so different
and that's what makes it so great.
You're right, the casting is fantastic.
Yeah.
And the idea came from the internet, not me,
but I think Giselle would be the perfect choice
to take over hosting.
Wow, that's a great idea.
I'm just like, you don't really like him.
Because you know, she'd be like, why are you keeping him?
You don't really like him.
Yes, she would get right down to it.
And that's what you mean.
Yeah.
Amy, this was so much fun talking to you.
Oh my God, my stomach is in pain.
I laughed so hard.
You killed me.
I've got to go take a nap from laughing so hard.
You were making me laugh.
Thank you so much for having me do this.
Your Luann is perfect.
Your impressions are all good, but your Luann literally sounds exactly like her.
I love you so much.
That's crazy.
Thanks for having me.
So talented.
Everybody go follow and listen to Drama Darling.
Anywhere you get your podcasts, follow Amy on Instagram at meetamyphilips and go to her
Patreon for a ton of extra recaps, including all of you who are looking for secret lives
of mom and wife.
Yes.
You can find hilarious recaps of it over there.
Earl.
The pearl.
We sure love you guys.
I love you, Amy.
Thanks for being here, baby.
Thank you and thanks to all your listeners.
We'll talk to you guys soon.
Bye.
Bye.
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