Watch What Crappens - #2871 Top Chef S22E12 Part Two: The Forage Seasons

Episode Date: June 2, 2025

This is part 2 of 2Top Chef: Destination Canada heads into its semifinals and challenges its cheftestants to forage for their supper. Everyone rises to the challenge, which makes the elimination a nailbiter. To watch this as a video recap, listen to our Trailer Trash and Road Trip bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Tickets for our final Mounting Hysteria Tour in Seattle June 12 and LA June 19 are now on sale at watchwhatcrappens.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to watcha crappin's ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Every big moment starts with a big dream. But what happens when that big dream turns out to be a big flop? From Wondry and Atwill Media, I'm Misha Brown, and this is the Big Flop. Every week, comedians join me to chronicle the biggest flubs, fails, and blunders of all time, like Quibi. It's kind of like when you give yourself your own nickname and you try to, like, get other people to do it.

And the 2019 movie adaptation of Cats. Like, if I'm watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground, there's something wrong with the movie. Find out what happens when massive hype turns watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground, there's something wrong with the movie. Find out what happens when massive hype turns into major fiasco. Enjoy The Big Flop on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to The Big Flop early and ad-free on Wondery Plus. Get started with your free trial at Wondery.com slash plus. Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab C Hi everyone, welcome back! This is part two of a two-part recap. If you're wondering where part one was, well go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe so that way you always

get your episodes. But enough of that, let's get right back into the episode. So then Tristan is cooking things over indirect heat and everything. And then Shwe is making cabbage. And he's saying that he doesn't want to char the cabbage on its own, because then it'll be very dry and brittle. Like Gail's hair. And you just want to add that to the stock and kind of reduce it in the stock. So it just kind of glazes itself.

Like Gail taking a bath. Wow, I'm on a real run today. Unlike gale. Oh, so Tom comes. He's like, well, hey, chef, you cook outside often Tristan. I was told to ask you about the outside. It's going to be wacky. It's going to be crazy. Have you seen that BMW? Have you seen that BMW? And Tristan's like, yeah, not like this. He's like, oh, so, uh, what are you making? Oh, what are you up to? What are you doing? And Tristan's like, well, I'm doing a Canadian version of jerk pork, and I had a hard time, honestly,

relating it to black people in the mountains, and so it's just, like, it's not the place that we're at, but it's the direction I'm going, I'm just gonna use all the forage items. All right, I wasn't really listening, but what are the forage items that you're using? Pork? Roast hips? He's like, poplar barks.

You know, I can use that kind of for cinnamon. Yarrow. Using yarrow. That's good. Oh, I think I went to high school with her. Yeah. And thyme and rosemary. Definitely them. Kind of as a flavor. Rose hips. Rose hip. Oh, Rose. Rose has good hips. God, I love Golden Girls.

What are we talking about here? You know, those BMWs have TVs in them, really good stuff. Yeah, I just watched Despicable Me 3, great movie. So he's like, well, it sounds like you have a game plan. We'll just go through the motions of pretending like you're not gonna win this all. Okay, all right, Cesar, what are you doing? Why are you hiding behind the tree stump?

Do you wanna come out? You wanna talk to strangers? Is that okay? You got some honey mushrooms. Hey, you got some honey mushrooms there? And he's like chest nuts and goes, oh, well chestnut mushrooms. Well, well, okay.

Let's shoot that again. Maybe with somebody else. I don't wanna repeat the line, but okay. What else? What else you got there? Lions mean portobelloes. They were foraged. Don't tell anybody about the other mushroom, my God.

Well, yeah, I saw that in the post office. That was crazy. You got some ants, you foraged those, does it really count as foraging or just hunting and trapping ants? You know, you don't have to serve us ants if you don't need to, if you don't want to. It's perfectly okay.

We don't really want to have any ants. He's like, yeah, I did it. It's like, they're really yummy. He just basically talks about it. He's making this alpastor and everything. He's like, okay, good luck. And'm going to make conchi. T-Jet basically talks about it. He's making this alpastor and everything. He's like, oh, good luck. And Mossimo, how are you doing over there? Mossimo, what are you up to?

Couldn't be better. Great. Everything's great. We're in a forest. It's amazing. I have an extra half hour. I'm going to do banak. Cooked on rock.

I'm excited. I'm so excited. I love this. I love this. Forging forests like Italy. I'm going there. I'm going there, right? So intense. Everybody else is like, well, here's what I'm going to make.'m going there. Right. So intense. Everybody else is like,

well, here's what I'm going to make. Mossimo. How about you? So Bailey's like, okay, what about you, Bailey? What are you up to? She's like, oh, I'm having a ball. So it doesn't sound too convincing. It's like, yeah, well, I got some cow, cow, cow peas, and I'm also doing a lamb picadino with it, and grilled, marinated dandelion greens, and kind of a creamy stack, kind of like a puree situation, you know, real glam rock stuff. Well, it's funny, I'm not really sure what you're making, but I do remember pulling over one time

to use the restroom while we were on tour, and Padma said, hey, Tom. I said, hey, Padma, where's Gail? And she said, Tom, cow peas. Sorry, that one took a while, but it was really stupid. So I hope it was worth it. I remember it well. I just told my dear friend, Lauren Bacall, here in heaven. I still have the heart to tell her that Tuesday morning closed.

Hold on one second. Jerome Robbins is coming over. Hey, Jerome, you want to hear about my coworker, Gail? I used to say, Cal, please. Yeah, that's it. Jerome Robbins really didn't laugh at that one as hard as he should. West Side Story, more like Stupid Side Story. Get out of here, ghosts. Jerome Robbins.

Get out of here, West Side Bory. Get out. Nobody likes you, Jerome Robbins. Everyone knows sailors don't tap dance. Stupid. You want to go to America? How about you get out of Heavenica? So Tom's like, well, maybe. Sounds like you're not quite 100% there yet. He's like, yeah, I mean, gosh, I just don't know what to do. I mean, I'll tell you this, whatever I'm cooking is gonna come with a side of regret.

Sounds great. All right, Shwey, what are you doing? And why are you wearing that strange floral dress? Well, it was my grandmother's. Shwey, why are you a skeleton sitting on the second floor of a building, rocking back and forth creepily? Hi, this is Padma Lakshmi again, Ghost Padma. I just want to say I've become very good friends with Anthony Perkins.

So watch what you say. Watch your goddamn mouth, Tom. You're going to be strangled with a black turtleneck. So, Shwai's like... Why don't you got a damn mouth time? You're going to be strangled with a black turtleneck. So Shwa's like, Shwa, tell me about your thing. Let me guess. It's for your grandma. He's like, it's for my grandma. He's like, no, nailed it. We'd love that. We'd love a good grandma story here. He's like, well, I'm just going to make a, I made a bunch of,

I found a bunch of Cecil roots and I'm going to make a stock and I'm going to make a almost like a spruce and poplar oil. And by the way, Tom, can you tell me the difference between a text message and an email? What do you wanna know? Just a question my grandma always asks me. Tom laughs Also Tom, can you help me set up my Apple TV?

Yeah, exactly. So I, Tom, I got an email from someone that says they have the last name is me and they're the last person in Nigeria with that last name and somebody passed away and I could, I don't know, do you have a bank account? I could transfer some money to. All right. Well, this has been fun. I almost nerfed. You know, you've changed a lot, Shreya. I mean, doing things for your grandma now, that is nuts. And Shwe is like, yeah, you know,

I've just been feeling way more myself, you know? Like now this is my life, I knit. I mean, I just didn't realize, you know, I knit and I wake up early and walk around the mall before the store's open. It's crazy. You know what they call us, guacamole? It's like, yeah.

You know, Tom, I, there should just be like a, there should be like a Top Chef outdoor cooking. I was suggesting Top Chef naked and afraid. Well, I don't know if I want to do it naked, but certainly I'd be afraid. Well, maybe there should be a Top Chef, Top Chef just get a career already

and I could just star my son. We've already had, we've already had that show backstage, and it was called Gail's Naked and I'm Afraid. So please, let's not revisit that. Lauren, I'm sorry. Lauren, I'm sorry. That really upset Lauren. I did try to pitch to NBC Universal, Top Chef, Bad Patterns and Afraid,

but unfortunately Gail wasn't available for the dates that we had wanted. Well, you know, the chefs, they were foraging and they're using products they don't really know, but they can also relate them to other products they do know. So take care. You know, you got a mushroom, make a mushroom taco. I mean, there's no, I don't know mushroom. I know tacos, put them together. Boom. You know what? A taco is only a friend you haven't met yet. You know, there's a lot of things they're all doing interesting is Bailey.

She's gonna have to add a little bit more sweetness to her dish because when I last had my check, she just had taken a handful of dirt and put it into a fry pan. So she put it in her own eyes and started crying and saying, why am I here over and over again? So something about glam rock. I wasn't sure what that was. So she, she said she was going to find the most glamorous rock she could find in the

dirt. So, you know, some, some are going to win. Some are going to lose. That's just top chef. That's how it goes. Mother nature is a real bitch. She'll kill you. So, uh, Bailey's like, well, everything I'm doing today feels so risky. I mean, God, there's so strong flavors here. I mean, is there too much poplar? I wish I was poplar.

I wish I was poplar. I wish I was poplar. I wish I was poplar. Too much poplar, the gay Simmons story. So hold on one second. Lauren Bacall has a question. Her name is Gail Simmons. Yes. No, no one likes her.

That's why we make these jokes. God, keep up Lauren Bacall. Yeah, Lauren Bacall. So Tom's like, okay, I'm out of here. I'm going to get into this beautiful B4 and see what that big man put the shaved head in a tiny little car does to those little minion things. See you later, alligators.

So Tristan, oh, sorry, go ahead. No, I was gonna say Massimo is making a cracker. And Tristan, you're gonna say what Tristan's up to. Oh, he's doing greens. He's doing a kaiyalu. Nothing but greens. What is that? You said he's doing greens. He's doing a calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla,

calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla, calla raiding my arugula, ripping through the rampian,

my champion, my favorite. I should have laid a spell on him right there. I should have turned him into a stone or a dog or a chair. But I let him have the rampian I'd lost to spare and return however I said, fair is fair. You can let me have the baby that your wife will bear. Okay, and we'll call it square. Get your grandma off my stage.

Get her off my stage, Shwe. This is my number. Get your grandma off my stage. Get her off my stage, Shwe. This is my number. Shwe is sitting over his stool going, care for the words you say, children will listen. Care for the things you do, children will see, they'll see. Brando, Brando Bleden just goes back out.

Care for the words you say, children will forage. Yeah, so he's doing greens and coconut milk and spices. And he's gonna make coconut milk out of parsnips. And because also not to steal storylines, but he used to watch his grandmother make her own coconut milk all the time. So... That's cool, actually.

It's a grandmother off. Yeah, it really is. Yeah, it's cool, but it is a lot of grandmother stuff. Yeah. So they're all cooking, and Shua and Cesar are picking out ants from their bag of frozen ants. And now the judges are arriving.

And I'm happy because one of the... one of the guests that are coming to sit at the table is none other than Canada Smile herself, Nicole. I love her. All stars. What a just little bundle of joy she is. Every time you see her, Canada Smile just sitting there smiling. She's just so happy to be alive.

She's my favorite. You think she's mean to babies? Do you think she pinches babies? No. She's mean to no one. I think she does. She's mean to no one, because she's just so happy and lovely.

She's already Canadian, so she's already nice to people. And then she's just on top of that Canada smile. We love Nicole. We wanted her... I think we wanted her to win Top Chef World All-Stars or whatever, but she didn't.

It's too bad. So, anyway, they sit whatever, but she didn't, it's too bad. So anyway, they sit down and Kristen's like, well, everyone, welcome to our final challenge here in Canada. Nicole, Paul, welcome back. Scott and Matricia, thank you for being here. This table spends a lot of time outside foraging. You know the land well and...

I've been in your shoes. I understand what it's like to forage. I get it. I get it, guys. It's the dog's doggone armed forage road. Savor these moments. Savor them. Guys, are you thinking there needs to be more grandparent talk? Okay, let's do it. So one of the guest judges, Scott, is like,

you guys, here's what I remember, summertime, and going out on the land with my grandparents. Because that's what you do, you know? So nostalgic. I remember just walking through the forest and my grandma would say, eat that. I would eat it and then I would throw up. She would start laughing and then smack me

on the back of the head and say, use your own brain, you goddamn idiot. It's good being back here. My grandmother, she always loved this land, which is why we buried her, scattered her ashes right here in that, wait a second, there's a BMW on top of my grandmother. Making fun of the BMW, not cultures.

So then Tristan says, he's happy with his pork. And then he's saying that he wants to reference his Afro-Caribbean culture, et cetera. And he's presenting his food. So he's made this thing, it's jerk, he calls it not jerk chicken, it's OG jerk. He says it's glazed with birch sap and plantain miso syrup and poplar bark was used as cinnamon and yarrow used as thyme.

And then the lots of greens, the quarry Lake Kalaloo instead of coconut milk made parsnip, parsnip milk which is cray cray. And he's like, then at the end he goes, sorry, I'm out of breath, I'm chubby. So Kristen's like, God, I could just listen to him talk about food all day. Jesus Christ, got some hot talking about food. The way he did milk that parsnip, holy fuck.

Wow. He's just like Jerome Robbins talking about dance all day. Wow, we get it, Jerome. You're a choreographer. Gil talks about food all day, and I want to sit with her. And Brenda's like, one of the things that's really important to me is connecting people to land. And I'm really tasting the land in this dish. You know, I get that Brenda's being very sweet here in kind. I don't think I've ever heard that used as a compliment.

You know what this tastes like? Land. I don't think I've ever heard that used as a compliment. You know what this tastes like? Land. This tastes like... Maybe if you're like, can you send this back? It tastes like the land. I just, it's very, it's like, did you put dirt in here? Just please take this away. She's like, everyone, normally when I say it tastes like the land,

it's really a special thing because we take from the land and it's very sacred. But in this case, I think he did put dirt in this. He overforged. No, they love it. They love it. They're like kind of blown away. It looks wonderful. It's Tristan, of course it's great.

And it's very, and by the way, I mean, all this stuff looks amazing that they're doing here. And it is very cool that they are, I mean, I can't stand foraging like in general, but like it is special that they come to this place and they are foraging with these foods that are like sacred to this group of people. And they are making all this great food.

And like, I don't like foraging in like the forests of LA, but I think it's cool when people forage. You don't like forests? You don't like LA's foraging? I'm not going to run into Canon and forage. That's crazy. You're just coming back with a Burger King wrapper. You're like forage. You don't like LA foraging? I'm not going to run into Cannon and forage. That's crazy. You're just coming back with a Burger King wrapper. You're like, well.

Like, I don't want to forage. I don't want to forage. Found a youth condom on the street and a stiletto from a hill that broke off. I don't like foraging for me personally, but I think it's cool when other people can do it and can actually do it well. I'm always shocked that they can.

Well, yeah, to see what creative things they come up with with things that they could never plan. Really? Oh yeah, let's see what creative things they come up with with things that they could never plan on using, you know? Yeah. So then they all love Tristan, basically. He killed it. And then one of the ladies is like, guys, there's an eagle flying over there.

There's three. That's very rare. This is a very special day, which is pretty cool, three eagles. I don't really have anything to say about that. Three Eagles, that's cool. That's better than, you know, like three pigeons. So then Tracy goes, Tracy says, that's a good sign.

Like, yeah, it means that they're getting ready to feast on Gail. So then, watch out Gail. So then Bailey is still working. Bailey has no idea what she's doing. She is just improvising. She keeps throwing stuff into her food. Her beans aren't quite done.

She's just a disaster over there. Bailey's just like... It's coming together. It's not coming together. I'm gonna fail. What am I gonna do with this? I'm terrible. So she's going through it over there. But Cesar is doing good. He's plating and he's like,

plating is where I have the most fun. It's like creation, but it's also destruction because I create the food and then I smash it over their heads and watch them try to eat it without getting glass in their teeth. So the food is served and Kristen's like, we've got ants, we've got ants brought to you by Downy.

If you have an ant invasion and need to wipe up some ants, use Downy. Have you got ants in your pants? Use Downy. I did it during my season and I've forgotten it. Sorry, when I said Downy, I was thinking of paper towels, which is Brawny, another sponsor of Top Chef.

Brawny, the preferred paper towel for wiping up ants when you have reached for the downy instead. Wow, girl. Congratulations on getting a paper towel brand. So they really like Cesar. He's done a mushroom trompeau with a mushroom piville broth and toasted ants. And he's like, it's like a fusion between pastore tacos, also cochinita pivil with some roasted pineapple,

but also maybe a little soap and some adobo sauce made out of rose hips. Well, here we go again, rose hips. Everybody just trying to give me a boner today. Rose nylon, I will never forget you, ma'am. I'm just really glad someone used rose hips because finally we get a dish that won't lie to us. They can't

so So then Scott is this guy Scott says he loves that they love the broth They love this. He says we love our soups. We eat soups when it's plus 40 And they're all like we don't do Celsius. So we have no idea what that is Actually, that wouldn't be Celsius That's fair. I don't know. Don't know. No that wouldn't be Celsius. That's fair and hate. Plus 40 Celsius would be like, plus the 40 Celsius would be wild, wild temperatures.

I can't even do like the time changes in our country. Like I can't do like Eastern Standard Time different with Pacific Time. I fuck it up every time. I'm just not smart like that. So Bailey's like, oh God, my cow peas aren't really here right now. But they're closed, but I'm waiting

until the absolute last minute to take them out of the liquid. I'm gonna fuck up the cowpeas, I just know that. ants and Massimo is butterflying a trout and Massimo is like, trout is very, very thin. It's going to be extremely difficult to get the crispy skin, the perfect cook, the smoke all at the same time. But this isn't my first barbecue. It's my second one. So good luck to me. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crap-Ims commercial. Every successful business starts with an idea, and on the best idea yet, we're obsessed

with those light bulb moments. Like how a bored barista invented the Frappuccino during his downtime, and then it got acquired by Starbucks. Or how Patagonia's iconic fleece was inspired by a toilet seat cover. On the best idea yet, we dive into the untold origin stories behind the products you're obsessed with and the bold risk takers who made them go viral. These are the wild ideas and insights that made Birkenstock the best-selling sandals since Jesus.

And made Super Mario the most played video game in the history of attention span. Nintendo almost became a ramen company until Super Mario saved it. New episodes drop every Tuesday. Follow The best idea yet on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus. And if this podcast lasts longer than 45 minutes, call your doctor.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Every big moment starts with a big dream. But what happens when that big dream turns out to be a big flop? From Wondery and Atwill Media, I'm Misha Brown and this is The Big Flop. Every week, comedians join me to chronicle the biggest flubs, fails, and blunders of all time like Quibi. It's kind of like when you give yourself your own nickname and you try to get other people to do it.

And the 2019 movie adaptation of Cats. Like, if I'm watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground, there's something wrong with the movie. Find out what happens when massive hype turns into major fiasco. Enjoy The Big Flop on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts.

You can listen to The Big Flop early and ad free on Wondery Plus. Get started with your free trial at Wondery.com slash plus. At 24, I lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me. And the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes, and politics. I would define reclaiming as to take back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again. So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks, both recognizable and unrecognizable names,

about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph. My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up. They connected with the people that I'm talking to and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts.

You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts. You know, Massimo, I like Massimo. I really wanted to see Massimo in the finals, but this is the second, at least time, well, it's the second time in a row. Didn't he do this last week where he's just like

a simple grilled piece of fish, and then they've got, everyone's using all this crazy stuff, and he's like, I went with mustard, mustard greens, mustard this, mustard that, so I'm leaning into fish and mustard. Like, it's very boring, Massimo, okay? I mean, it looks pretty,

but I'm trying to root for you, Massimo, let me root for you. Yeah, yeah. So now it's time for Bailey to serve. So she comes and she greets everyone. She goes, well, for you guys, I did a glam rock, glam spedino, spedino spelled for everyone, S-P-I-E-D-I-N-O, which means that most of the word

says Spidey, anyone here a fan of the Hills? No? Okay, well then that joke fell flat. Anyway, it's got grilled dandelion salad and Cow Town cow peas or black-eyed peas. And I also use black poplar syrup as well as the birch syrup to glaze it, so good luck to everyone. And she tells us, she's like, oh God, this is just different from everything I made.

I just feel so exposed. It's like, can I not eat your trauma? Like, please. So they, one of the ladies is like, well, there's meat on a skewer, I'm in. That's all she needed. It's like, you know, I love the lamb and the dandelion greens. So she did a good job. And Tom's like, yeah, I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that.

I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that.

I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that.

I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not customers at my son's bar. Why did he ever think being a We've got to be on a plane with one of these people. BOTH LAUGH So, Shwaai, meanwhile, is finishing his dish, and he's like, whenever I cook out of memory and love,

it always comes out pretty well, especially, uh, when I shape the food to spell out the word grandma on a plate. I really like that. So, today I made a roasted cabbage I've fallen in, I can't get up, with a rose hip glaze, a pork belly lavage and thatching and togarashi. Okay. Great.

What was that thing about falling and not getting up? It's just a button you press if you fall. Just look out for me, guys. Look out for me. Now the oil you have is kind of tingly. It's got a spicy note there, but there should also be some refreshing notes from the polydent I added in there. Now, that oil is made from black spruce,

as well as poplar buds, and there's just a bit of Sichuan peppercorn, and to the right of it, there's a picture of Alex Trebek to remind you of all the days you spent watching Jeopardy. I was gonna do the peppercorn in pages from the phone book because my grandson told me we don't use phone books anymore. And I said, you will take this out of my cold dead hands, literally. So enjoy this. So Gale's like, well, the sauce around the dish, that was sort of, it was sort of translucent.

What was that? Well, Gale, it's not deodorant, so you can stop putting it under your armpits. Well, it was basically like Gail leaning up against a window. So she's like, this is a top chef first, translucent. And so I was like, oh, that's stock, you know, Asian stocks are made out of medicinal things. So, yeah. And stock, you know, um, Asian stocks are made out of medicinal things. So yeah. And then, you know, the answer just for fun.

And Kristen's like, wow, this is amazing. And Scott's like, yeah, you know, I thought, okay, cabbage, but it wasn't just cabbage. There was so much flavor in it. And burn it on the outside and get it perfect on the inside. God damn it. This cabbage changed my life. You know what's funny? and get it perfect on the inside. God damn it, this cabbage changed my life. You know what's funny?

Because I heard that when Gail was single, she used to use a dating app called Not Just Cabbage. But then customers complained after they met her that it was misleading. So they had to change the name of the app. Now it's called Bagel. Now it's just called a bagel. Bagel meets cabbage.

So Brenda, they- Bagel eats bagel. I'm not gonna lie, I did buy a cabbage today and I think I was partially influenced by this episode. I was like, I want some cabbage. I buy cabbage. I eat a lot of cabbage, actually. I love a cabbage.

I buy cabbage too. Me too, I love cabbage. Me and Lauren get together for cabbage all the time. You guys might not know this, but there's actually the better cabbage in heaven than there is on earth. So Lauren Bacall and I are going to have a cabbage dinner. Sorry, you can't be here. Even if you were, Dad, you wouldn't be invited. Sorry. Hey, Jerome Robbins, enjoy eating your not cabbage for dinner. So Brenda really was caught up with the pork belly, the vinegar side with the cabbage, the char.

She loved it. She calls it exquisite. And Gale's like, it was excellent. I loved it. So I went into the woods yesterday and he came out with this. Oh my God. Revelatory.

All right, do we have some defibrillators for Gale? She's kind of losing her mind. revelatory. All right, do we have some defibrillators for gal? She's kind of losing her mind. It's stupendous. It's amazing. It's absolutely what this is why we do what we do. It's the most amazing thing we've ever seen. All right, we need those defibrillators right away.

Gals, on the blow. So Mossimo is next and he's like the smoking of the junipers, what's going to finish cooking the trout? So I want flavors. I want to capture the judges. Get them. Lock them up. I highlighted forage ingredients to perfection.

This is a winning dish. Italy, here I come. In a BMW probably. Gotta love BMWs. Hey guys. All right. A Buddhist monk in saffron robes once told a 19-year-old David Bowie, I don't know what real glam rock is.

Sorry, sorry, Bailey, that was for you. Anyway... Glam rock. I'd already stole that. I'm gonna have to come up with something else in the next two minutes. I might as well just pack my bags. So the monk told a 19-year-old David Bowie,

who are you, where are you, and where are you going? Turns out that monk was actually just someone at the DMV. But anyway... He-he-he-he. It was a policeman. But that's neither here nor there. It was a crossing guard. Wearing a lot of orange. So hopefully this dish can answer at least two of those questions.

Yesterday when I was foraging, I saw mustard. Wow. You sound like Gail. Hold on, I can get there. You saw mustard. Wow. You sound like Gail at the aquarium, trying to break through one of the tanks. She thought she saw mustard. Turns out it was just a... Thanks.

She thought she saw mustard. Turns out it was just a, just a gripper. So this dish was conceptualized by mustard, mustard itself. So then I made grilled trout and then it's smoked in juniper, blah, blah, blah. But then it has mustard roots, mustard leaf, spiked, spoked potato puree with mustard. I love mustard. And I'm like, wow, mustard.

Great. Congratulations. Wow, you went for the easiest forage thing. Like we can get mustard greens in, well, I don't want to say every supermarket, but like mustard greens are a thing that you can get in supermarkets. Mustard root, I think you're pretty much

just dealing with mustard at that point. So wow, you use mustard. Everyone else is doing things like, you know, poplar and birch and ants, and he's like, mustard. I'm making mustard. Mustard greens. That's it. Well, even the meat, you know, even the protein,

it's like the simplest thing you could do, like a grilled trout. Come on, Massimo. Also, if you wanna, if you don't wanna be kicked out, don't highlight a protein where out is like the main part of the word, okay? Out, yeah. There's literally like out like trout. Isn't that a thing that people say? Don't do it.

It's like I was going to cook you a fish called acorn nifos and go, but. I'm just saying. I'm a trout. There was an exotic fish called, who are the weakest link goodbye. So Gale's like, well, everything in the bowl I thought was well balanced,

but the bannock, that really intense herb condiment, it just had such a bitter note, and it just felt disconnected from the trout. Well, that's something no one would ever accuse you of being. Jesus. That trout is still connected to your mouth. Somebody have Gail a napkin. Wow, Gail thinking everything in the bowl was well balanced.

Just because you put the bowl on your nose doesn't mean it's well balanced. And Kristen's like, well, he kind of left it up to the user to figure out how to eat it. So it was very confusing. We had a fish, potato, sauce. What do we do? You know what I mean? Very, very confusing. Do I put my fork in it? Do I, you know, put my finger inside of it? Not really sure how to do it. I could have used some instructions guys. This is the funniest thing because he basically he made this dish like a fish in a broth and

everyone agreed that that was delicious. But he made like this little cracker. He made a homemade cracker and put it on the side with a whole bunch of stuff on it. And the intent was to dip that into the broth. You get everything all together in this one big glorious bite. But they didn't know they were just eating the cracker on so and so we're just getting like a burst of seasoning without anything to balance it. And there are no them ever had the thought

to dip it into the soup. There was like one person was like, well, when I dipped it into the soup altogether, it was a delicious bite. But like, but what do we do with the cracker? There's a cracker on the side of the soup. What do we do? When a cracker comes next with soup, what are we supposed to do with it?

What do we do? What could it be there for? What would the topping on the crackers be for inside the soup? This is absolutely crazy. I'm so confused. You guys eat like 10 courses a day as your job. I'm so confused. So the judges all laugh afterwards,

and Gale's like, well, it's five really lovely inspired dishes today. All on your shirt, Gale. Come on, it's five really lovely, inspired dishes today. All on your shirt, Gale. Come on, it's called Mouth Closed. Food in, mouth closed. GALEN SHERRIDER Let's go back to Judge's Table that we're gonna shoot in the outdoors, in a windy field.

Okay, let's do that. So they go... TADDON This week for Judge's Table, we're going to take a... We're going to chop down several trees and balance them in between our two BMWs, which we'll have running just in case we have to make a quick exit. All right, great.

This time we are burning electric batteries for fuel and a bonfire. So Brenda's like, I was so touched. It was so connected to land. And Kristen's like, OK, Masamo, walk us through how it all came to be, possibly quietly, if you could do that. He's like, whoa, I know I wanted to cook trout on open flame. I was rooting for the open flame.

I had an half an hour extra, so I wanted to cook the bannock to have a little bread, to have something to dip in. You know, dip it, dip it. This is what you do with bread. I hope nobody asks what that was for because you're a bunch of fucking morons if you did that. You know, the fish was just beautifully cooked.

I loved the mustard relish made with the stems. That was great. And Kristin goes, the sauce, I mean, it was absolutely outstanding. I mean, to think about the sauce that you made, I've made sauces before. And I just want to say, savor this moment when you get to make a sauce

because it's really special. It's really special. You don't want to be old and look back and realize you didn't appreciate the sauce that you made. Enjoy the sauce right now. Enjoy it. And so Tom's, you know, they're all loving it. And Gail's like, well, I love that you put a lot of bitterness and herbaceousness onto the bannock. But the way that you plated it, there was just so much garnish on the bannock. I didn't think to dip it. I mean, wow, what an incredible thing. Could you put an instruction manual in there? Maybe a little Allen wrench, something.

I have to be honest, the way that you plated that cracker, the bannock cracker, I didn't think to dip it. I thought it was a hat, so I put it on, and I thought, wow, I have a look for the Emmys this year. And then all of a sudden, everyone was looking at me, and I said, what are you all looking at? And they said, wow, I guess Padma was really right. this year. And then all of a sudden everyone was looking at me and I said, what are you all looking at? And they said, wow, I guess Padma was really right.

We just thought she was a callous bitch, but it turns out there's some truth in jest, huh? And I said, what are you talking about? I'm wearing my new hat. And then they all laughed at me and I started to cry. It was very awkward. And next time you should tell me how to use my cracker. So now they moved to Tristan and Tristan is like, you know,

I thought of like wild pigs rummaging around and eating roots and tubers. So, you know, story, jerk sauce. And Tom's like, you know, layers and layers of flavors. I mean, that just kept coming. It's like gala to golden corral. And it was, you know, it was like you were using these ingredients

your entire life. I mean mean just absolutely stunning whoa, whoa The bread is like house a sounder that you came to the point of translated the language in my land To the food of your own culture, but I'm terribly sorry. I've never had any babies. Oh No, I just remember the game. I had a baby. I Oh, no. I just remembered again I had a baby. I did have a baby. A baby who loved tubas.

And I didn't realize it until you said you forged a tuba. Oh, come to mama. Um, so now they... And Tristan's like, thank you, I think food connects us no matter where we're from. If you're a person, you're a thing that likes food. Am I right, guys? People, food, food, people, people eating, eating done by people, am I right?

We're just one, we're all one. She's like, that is beautiful. That is fucking beautiful. A wise woman once said, we're all connected. And that woman's name was AT&T. Thank you. That was a beautiful story, Tristan.

So Cesar was like, well, I was so happy foraging today. I remember the first two things we tried were the rose hips and the ants. And that's where I got the idea to try to hatch this a little bit to make a rose hip and ant El Pastor featuring a giant hen of the woods that I stole from a forest that said, no trespassing, and here it is. And Tracy, of course, is like, oh my God, ants, my favorite ingredient.

Do you guys love ants or do you not? I mean, I have a restaurant 10 miles down the road. Do you know what we eat? Fucking ants, okay? All the time. And you guys love ants or do you not? I mean, I have a restaurant 10 miles down the road. Do you know what we eat? Fucking ants, okay? All the time. And this guy used ants. I fucking love ants. Great job using the ants.

God, where'd you get that idea? Did you freeze them before you toasted them? Ruined their entire fucking community. How were they? Delicious? Kristen's like, I've never actually personally cooked ants before, but I have cooked with my ants.

It's a beautiful thing to cook with your ant. Like, all right, Kristen. All right, that's enough. Cesar's like, yeah, I mean, I toasted them and I apologized to them at the same time, which is why you gotta love Cesar. Yeah, but doesn't that make you feel better, Ronnie, about the ant?

Yes, I love Cesar. That's why I love him. So Kristen's like but doesn't that make you feel better, Ronnie, about the ant? Yes, I love Cesar. That's why I love him. So Kristen's like, yeah, my first bite, it was bitter, but in a good way. Like Padma, thanks, Kristen, R-I-P. Hey! You know who's bitter? Jerome Robbins.

Sorry you don't get to eat cabbage with us, but why don't you make some new friends already, okay? By the way, I just had Gorbachev try Ant. It was hilarious. We sometimes eat cabbage with Gorbachev on Thursdays, but not Risa. She's the worst. I'm like, why do you stay with that bitch? Now that you're in heaven, you have so many more options, Gorby. So Tracy's like Ants, love them. Okay. So Kristen's like, yeah, it was bitter, What's your favorite food in the kitchen, and what's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen?

What's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen?

What's your favorite food in the kitchen? What's your favorite food in the kitchen? up thinking of my grandma and I went to bed thinking of my grandma. And while you were eating, I hope you felt like you were eating just a leg right off of my grandma. So yeah, nailed it. Pretty much nailed it. So Brenda's like, I was so many flavors within the dish, I tasted the medicine, but I felt it more than anything. Shra is like, great. My grandmother felt her medicine as well. Uh, so Tom was like, Oh, this is absolutely beautiful. I mean, I was, I was jealous that I didn't make this dish. I mean, then again, I also haven't cooked in my restaurant in probably about 25 years. Am I right? Huh?

So you could put that in a three star environment and it would hold up. It's great. Love it. It was one of the best things I've ever had in my whole goddamn life. No, it's for sure. Absolutely amazing. This tasted better than having a Sunfields. I'll tell you that. Shraa is like, well, I have to admit it. I know I says my grandma, it actually is more of my mom's. Oh, it's terrible.

I hate this. This is garbage. From now on, I only want grandma medicine tasting things. Okay. Mom medicine no longer cuts it on Top Chef. We want grandma medicine. So Bailey, did everything go how you wanted it? She's like, does it ever? Oh, today was sort of weird for me. I mean, I had to feel it

out. And I was like, I don't know. Is it gonna connect? Was it terrible? Did anybody get poisoned? Am I gonna die? Am I already dead? Am I already on a bus back home? And this is all a dream? Just tell me, just kick me out now. Brenda's like, well, you know, Bailey, yesterday when we started foraging, there was a little bit of intimidation going on there. Basically you were just like a scared white lady

and you were very confused. And today. Do you remember when I was dropping Prozac pills onto the ground just so you would forage those? Wish you had picked those up. But you got that little inner forager to come out and you produce something really unique, which is my way of saying you plundered our land like all the other white people do and

you made garbage out of it. Thanks a lot. If you're going to take our ingredients, at least make something that tastes good. Well, you know what? It was delicious. It was odd at times, but I have to say, it was great to do something feeling like you. Odd, weird, disconnected.

What's it doing? Is this a lasagna? I don't know. I don't know. All I do know is that that guy from Mission Impossible is still very confused about the tiramisu. So, good job. Tarzan is still trying to jump out of that building.

Unless it even works. I heard he was trying to explain to Tom Cruise that he ate a savory dish that looked like tiramisu, but it wasn't tiramisu. And Tom Cruise is like, bro, why do you keep talking to me about this? It's hilarious. So Kristen's like, and you cooked the peas from dry today.

I'm sorry, did you mean for the peas to be graveled? It almost choked me to death? Hold on, Lauren Bacall, one moment. Please, please don't let the cabbage get cold. I have to go back to earth for one thing real quickly. Did you mean to make such terrible food from your forged ingredients? Thank you. Okay, Lauren, I'm back. She's like, oh, God, those peas took me the whole time. And Gale's like, well, perhaps they were a second under, but it felt like a walk in the woods. Keep walking. Okay, well, I'm in the woods.

Keep going further, further, further. I can still see you. I can still see you. Okay, pull out a shovel, bury, dig a hole, get in the hole, put dirt on top of it. Wow, finally, Gail's in a decent outfit. Wow, Gail eats a spoonful of crunchy beans and she feels like she's walking in the woods.

Makes me wonder what she does with her free time. So, doesn't really make sense. Like, is Gail eating crunchy beans in the woods? She's like, well, I'm finished making my beans, and I took them out a little early, so let me go bring them into the woods and eat them. BLAIR So they tell them that it was exceptional across the board and yada yada.

Now, I really thought they were getting rid of Bailey because she had more complaints. They were like, this is weird. I didn't... Tom's like, I mean, it tasted kind of weird, but I kept eating it or whoever said that. And they said nothing but compliments over Massimo. So I really thought Bailey was out, which I didn't love to see, because I don't want it to be like a big sausage party at the end.

But I was like, Bailey's out of here. And also, I think it's hard because chefs are so confident, like they're overconfident a lot of times, but they have to have these personas that are like built on confidence that whenever I see someone who's not confident at all, it just makes me lose confidence in them, in the chef world.

You know, I'm like, you're dead, you're dead here. They're never gonna vote for you. You have zero confidence, but it didn't happen. Yeah. No, no, because ultimately I guess Massimo had issues, that cracker really threw them for a loop. They were like, it was so overpowering. It was just absolutely awful.

So they were so confused about the cracker, and then ultimately they decided that Bailey, while flawed, she was more adventurous, And Massimo was actually safe because he just basically did mustard. Yeah, so I think they, you know, I can see that angle of choosing for that. Obviously I didn't eat it, but I'm like undercooked peas? No.

It's like to go to the finals of Top Chef and you're serving some undercooked peas. And then everything about his, like, oh my God, it was brilliant. The sauce was amazing. The stuff, once we figured out how to do it, it was amazing together. So I was kind of surprised, but I don't know. Yeah, I was surprised too. Their biggest issue was that it was disconnected. But I didn't, it seemed like Bailey had the sort of technical issues that would get her eliminated.

But then they can return to judge's table and Kristen's like, Massimo's boring as fuck too though. So it's like you can't even stand up too much for Massimo. It's like quell trap, mustard. Yeah, he's like annoying. Yeah. Yeah. So chefs, chefs just an exceptional day all around and you all did remarkable.

But as we know, there can only be one winner. And Tracy and Brenda, as our guest judges, you get to announce our winner. Oh my God, could it possibly be anyone other than Tristan? It's Tristan, it's Tristan. Oh, actually no, it was Shwe in this case. Shwe won. Tristan did not actually win. Oh, my God. Could it possibly be anyone other than Tristan? It's Tristan. It's Tristan. Oh, actually, no, it was Shwe in this case. Shwe did not actually win. Yeah, Shwe. That cabbage looked so good. I mean, I wanted to eat it so badly.

It just was, like, perfectly caramelized. And, ugh, it looked fantastic. So now we find out who's getting kicked off. And the bottom two are Massimo and Bailey. We've already told you, he gets kicked off. It's Bailey. She's out of here. I mean, no, sorry. It is Massimo. He's out of here. Yeah. And he's like, Oh my God, what's next? I'm going to hug my children until they're blue in the face and never breathe again because I'm sick of children. That's it. I just have to remember what they look like. So I'll be hugging several children in Montreal until I find them.

My wife has changed her address again, so wish me luck. So yeah, so he goes off and Kristen's crying. She's like, you did a crutch up. I don't want to say this. You did a crutch up. So then they're like, cheers, you're all going to Milan, which does that sucks for Massimo. I mean, he's like his whole thing is he cooks Italian food and then he, and he is a Canadian judge and he gets,

he gets dropped right before going to Milan. So that's a bummer, but whatever. Sorry. Well, that's the end of top chef. Yeah, that's the end. So that's it everyone. Thanks for being here. Thanks for listening, and we will catch you on the next Top Chef episode. Bye everyone. Bye. the Amber way. It's the foster and the furious. It's Amanda Foster. She can run my country. It's Angie McGovern. It's always automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together

for Carly Clapp. Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila. She's a Daniela. We never miss her call. It's Diane call. Aaron McNicholas. She don't miss no trickle. Lava Nagila Weber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go, we all go for Hugo. Jamie, she has no less name-y. She's our kind of mess, it's Jennifer Messer. Sip some scotch with Jessica Tratch. She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock.

Kristen the Piston Anderson. Get a B in your bonnet with Lacey B. Rigging the funk, it's Leslie Plunkett. She gets an A from us, it's Lindsey D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McHenry. We love her on the rocks, it's Melissa Cox. Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the Berg.

This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian. I love a ya, Olivia Williamson. Tastier than Flanderson, it's Rachel Manderson. She sure is swell, it's Raquel. Yes we canna, it's Savannah. Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge. The Bay Area Betches, Betches.

And our super premium sponsors. She's VVIP, it's Amanda V. Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin Somebody get us 10 ccs of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva Let's get real with Kaitlyn O'Neal. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides Let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs. Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland. It's our queen, it's Queen Laifah. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall.

Know your worth with Jason Curth. Hail the cork master, the master of the cork, Jennifer Corcoran. We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. She's a little bit loony. Junie, my favorite Murdo. Karen McMurdo. She gets an A, it's Kelly B.

We love him madly, it's Kyle Podchadley. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder-Baron. She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthi. Always killing it, it's Lola Alcolani. The incredible, edible Matthews sisters. She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose. We're on the floor with Molly Dorsett. There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud. She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke. If you We love you guys!