Watch What Crappens - #2875 Below Deck S12E01 Part Two: By Dawn’s Early Black Light

Episode Date: June 3, 2025

This is part 2 of 2The season premiere of Below Deck welcomes a new cast of crazy people with varying degrees of aptitude. It’s all made more challenging by a primary guest who insists on scanning every surface with a black light.To watch this recap on video, listen to our Trailer Trash bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Tickets for the Mounting Hysteria Tour are now on sale at watchwhatcrappens.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to watcha crappin's ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Every big moment starts with a big dream. But what happens when that big dream turns out to be a big flop? From Wondry and Atwill Media, I'm Misha Brown, and this is the Big Flop. Every week, comedians join me to chronicle the biggest flubs, fails, and blunders of all time, like Quibi. It's kind of like when you give yourself your own nickname and you try to, like, get other people to do it.

And the 2019 movie adaptation of Cats. Like, if I'm watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground, there's something wrong with the movie. Find out what happens when massive hype turns watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground, there's something wrong with the movie. Find out what happens when massive hype turns into major fiasco. Enjoy The Big Flop on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to The Big Flop early and ad-free on Wondery Plus. Get started with your free trial at Wondery.com slash plus. Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Crab Hi everyone, welcome back! This is part two of a two-part recap.

If you're wondering where part one was, well go check in the feed and be sure to subscribe so that way you always get your episodes. But enough of that, let's get right back into the episode. So Fraser alerts everyone, including the chef, that the primary likes a steak extra well done, burned, absolutely no pink at all, because the primary is joyless. That's what we're finding out about this guy. The black light and the burned to a crisp steak, why are you even eating steak? There's just nothing.

At that point, it's just texture. He's burning all the germs out of it. I'm sure. I know, but why even eat it? There's going to be nothing left to eat from it. You're eating dead rotting flesh. Yeah. You'll be okay. Yeah. I'm sure I know but why even eat it there's gonna be nothing left to your eating from a dead riding flash Yeah, you'll be okay. Yeah So Fraser is like, oh god, they're really going to test us so day two and the guests would like to have a Bollywood themed dinner

So if nothing goes right today blame Barbie. All right. Have we got this all down? All right, so day three we're coming back and we're going through the month this lovely bridge, I'm going to hit it one day. So just be prepared. I'm ready to take on Captain Jason Cisco helmet for it in advance. So Fraser holds on to the girls. And he's like, all right, what I've always said the first charter isn't easy. Neither is any charter because chartering is hell.

Do you understand? All right, now, the first charter, Barbara, you'll be waking up at six, Rainbow, you will be doing late. Also, I'd appreciate you fixing the spelling of your name, because you're quite dour. All right? All right.

Barbara, since you already have bedhead, you'll be waking up early. Rainbow, since it seems have bedhead, you'll be waking up early. Rainbow, since it seems like I might torture you to be called Rainbow, but to be around at night, you'll be on dates. And now everyone go back to cremace. Okay, if that's okay with you. And like, okay, sure.

So then Barbara wants to talk to Fraser about Solaine. And she's like, you know, I promise I'm not picky, even though it's the first half of the first day and I already have something to tell you, but Solaine, she's already really annoying me. I mean, like I was showing her how to fold a towel and you know, like that role, just the way she says, did Fraser say to do this? Like, yes, like she's not believing that I'm telling her what you're telling me to tell her, you know, like I'm very easy. Um, you know, like I'm an open, she says something like I'm an open book. I'm very easy until the second page. I love that. I'm very easy until the second page.

And he said, here's what we do. You've got to be like me. Don't ever read past the first page. Stay on the cover. I'm an open book, but only my first page is accessible. Everything after that is coupled. And it's like, all right, well, you know, I'm going to test and look and see how things are going. But, you know, look, I've got already consulted a chef, so let's just try to be positive.

You know what I'm saying? Because I can tell you right now, she's way more interesting on television than you are so far. Just deal with her. So chaos also assigning roles about what time people are going to wake up, etc, etc. And demo is talking to Kyle about how he's been working and stuff and Kyle's like, we had the girl I met last year. I tried to make it work where I was like a lost fucking puppy.

Do you know what I mean? I was just fucking went for it. You know, it's like a lot happened to me and Barbie after St. David. When I got to Miami, we linked up and had a beautiful relationship. And I think part of me still does love that girl, but I think we're very different people. She's rich and poor. Her dowry is for Coca-Cola. My mother works for a note company. And as our core, we don't connect. I'm single. I'm free. Her mother kept asking me what the best way to drain my balls was, and it was just uncomfortable.

By the end of that relationship, I had diabetes because they just fed me so much Coca-Cola. I think there's only so much a man can take. Remember, because her mom was like a sex therapist. And he's like, yeah, my mom talks all about sex therapy with me. I remember when we broke up, Barbie said, I'm a coke and you're a zero. So go. So Carrie is giving Kao everybody's resumes to look over and he thinks everything's going to be great and apple let's are handed over.

Um, and he needs to work out who's going to be the lead deckhand and all that stuff. And so then we go to Solane and Barbara and they're figuring out closets in their room. So so like, Oh, so you want to take like that closet and I take this closet and she goes, yeah, yeah. I mean, there's two closets. They're the same size. So I'll take this one.

You take that. Just, no, yours is bigger, but of course I can take, I'm only working on 19,000 boats. So only at once, two boats at once, but that's okay. You take the bigger closet. Of course. And she's like, no, it's not the bigger closet. It's the bigger closet. Frasier told me that. Did he? No, but I want to see that. Oh, really? No. Pete Slauson And then we get Domo and he's like, oh, I'm a massive flirt. I mean,

these girls are just so hot. Oh, I've definitely got Peter Pan syndrome. Well, your genes don't, so get the fuck over it. Decker Really, you're a De deckie who has Peter Pan syndrome. I've never seen this before. It's not like you're working on boats to get away from having actual real responsibilities on land. This is a breakthrough in terms of deckie personas. Yeah, like it's great that your personality feels 20, your face does not.

Get some sunblock and date an adult. Thank you. Why does he look like he's from like a 1990s Mountain Dew commercial? That's my question. He looks like an ex-sports person who's just never realized what like, I don't know, snowboarding in the sun was gonna do to him, you know?

It's like if Launchpad McQuack became an actual human, I probably would be. He does have that vibe, yeah. So now Fraser goes to talk to the captain and he's like, oh, well, listen, I love my team. They seem brilliant. And by brilliant, I mean idiots, morons, all of them. Solane has 22 days experience yachting in a shipyard.

A shipyard. It turns out her primary responsibility was to bring espresso martinis from a bar on the dock onto boats and hand them to people and then walk off of them. Why is she on my team? Because, well, let's look at their resume thing. So they look and they see that Rainbow has like a lot of experience.

So she's gonna wind up being the second stew., seconds to. So then, uh, Carrie's checking on Lawrence is how's it going today? You know, the first day is gonna be frantic and the next trip is gonna be less frantic. And then the third trip frantic again, then the fourth trip, even worse, the fifth trip, surprisingly easy, six trip, the worst thing you ever had in your life, seven trips, you'll want to jump off the boat. And Lawrence is like, Oh God, I'm fine. Everything's going to be fine. So 19 to all I save it. Save it.

So Fraser is telling Suleymane to do toilets and then cabins. And he's like, toilets should take no more than 10 minutes. I don't want you, I don't want you cleaning one longer than you're sitting in one. Do you understand? She's like, okay. And then Barbara's like, well, what do you want? What are we going to do now? She's like, well, I have to do three toilets. So I don't finish one and the pressure said 10 minutes and then it's 10 minutes and I

don't start. So I'm taking too long for the toilets. And like, do I have to clean the poop out of the toilets too? Does even the poop too? Do I have to do everything in the toilets for 10 minutes? And she's like, oh, just get the rags just because you bring everything with you. And she goes, Oh my God, I don't know where the product, where the product. Why? Why? Where is it?

She's like, it's here in the cabinet. All right. And you need this to clean the inside of the toilet. Do you know, you know, you have to brush, right? And she goes, Oh, really? In 10 minutes, it's already finished. I don't start 10 minutes is over. Where's the toilet?

Nothing happened. But if you don't stop talking I cannot explain and then you know longer you have to stop talking so we can do it but what about the mirror did you do the mirror of course you didn't do the mirror okay rag for the mirror? I clean the toilet cleaner? Use the vinegar. Use the vinegar. No, this is not for clean. No. No, vinegar? No, alcohol and vinegar. Not the same thing. Vinegar is vinegar. Vinegar is in the kitchen by the olive oil.

That is not the same vinegar. This is bathroom vinegar. Not the same one. You're lying. You're lying to me. That's peanut butter. I'm not children. Peanut butter not familiar. Bisou. Bisou. She's literally looking.

She's like, vinegar next to olive oil? Oh my God. I'm so embarrassed. I feel so embarrassed. She tells us. She's like, I have a lot of pressure inside. Like I'm not stupid. I'm just new.

I try to be the best sponge I can be, but I'm over every water everywhere in my sponge. This sponge is water everywhere. Too much water in the sponge can't absorb more. Oh gosh. I was dying laughing. That was so fucking good. So, Jess, Akayo is complimenting Jess because she's a manager and she seems to

be great. So she's going to be lead that cab. So she's like, means a lot to me. And then a Fraser is meeting with, uh, Carrie again and they're talking about how, you know, the guys arrive. Yeah, we need somebody to like be with the guests because it's gonna that we want them to see a steal who's gonna be best at that means like, so be Celine. She's a moron. But she'll probably give people lap dances and make them laugh. So let's go with her.

My only concern is she might serve them glasses of vinegar instead of champagne. She's just learned what vinegar does and she's adorable. Unfortunately, she was trying to clean the mirrors in the bathroom with red wine vinegar and had to correct her, but you know, she'll get there. So then he meets with the girls and he said, he basically makes rainbow seconds do and rainbow is so excited. She's like, I mean, obviously it can't be like woohoo. Let's go. Like, yes, like, yes. You know, like, Woohoo. Yes, yes, yes, yes. But like, really, I'm

like, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. I'm like, really, because you didn't really hide your excitement for too well when you're sitting there. So she's gonna be the main lady. And then Kerry is going around doing his anal checking thing with people were just funny. Say, All right, let's walk around and do checks, Fraser. All right. Let's see here.

First impressions. Can't have the boat looking like a dog's breakfast. Cleanliness is next to gaudliness. Lift that towel. Move that sink. Dim the lights. Move that rug over. Why is the toilet paper not folded into a swan flying over a river?

Can someone get that bottle of balsamic out of the bathroom? Why does this mirror have lipstick on it that says I'm not children? Then it says, be zoe on the next mirror. So confused. So, Kerry then goes off in the tender with Solanne and they meet with the guests and the guests have, there's like two children who are actually seem, they seem like perfectly fine children.

It's shocking, but like two lovely children. And Solanne is like, I don't understand baby people. They can be so cute, but not too close for me. And then you see her like meeting the child and she's like sticking Out her hand like oh Nice to meet you We're gonna go for a hand So now they get the tour they come to the boat they get to tour and the dad's like of my lights are in my bag

Specifically check the bathrooms. Honey. Did you bring Clorox? We've got to clean this disgusting boat with normal people. He's doing a sweep. Like he's literally preparing it for the president of a nation. So, uh, Fraser is like, listen, this boat has seen some pretty disgusting scenes. So let's just hope and pray he doesn't find anything too gross. I'm like, so Lane was cleaning this room. I guarantee people find something gross. I had her in trouble. I do not believe she was comprehensive. They're like, wait a minute, I was expecting germs,

but not a ham sandwich. That's a little weird. Oh, Dad, you found my sponge. So we get to see it and the daughter is like, oh, Dad, we need to get out our black lights and goes, yeah, where's the black light? She goes, mine's in my bathroom bag. And he's like, grab the black lights, honey, we need it.

So now everybody's- A generational black light trauma. They're all, like I was like, first I thought it was just gonna be the dad with the black light, but he's actually trained his children to go everywhere with a black light too. This is terrible, these people need to be stopped. And look, I know that, you know, we stay in a lot of hotels.

I don't think there's anything wrong with going in with a few Clorox wipes from your bag and just kind of making sure, you know, you guys stay safe or whatever. But there is something about making it your whole personality. Like everybody besides me is disgusting. So please fix this before I enter.

It's just- Yeah, sometimes you gotta take on some germs too, you know? Sometimes it's gonna toughen up your system, you know? Yeah, one day I'd like to show people like this how they were made. Okay, sir, this is a pile of spooch, okay? Mm-hmm, yeah. That was you.

Be quiet. That was you, that was you. Well, I hope they're wearing masks on an airplane because you know these people probably aren't. They're gonna make everything, clean everyone, everything else, and then they're not gonna wear a mask on an airplane when they're wearing masks on an airplane because you know, these people probably aren't they're going to make everything clean, everyone, everything else. And then they're not going to wear a mask on an airplane when they're the ones probably spreading all the germs in the first place. Okay.

So then we go to fun snacks, fun snacks. And they're like, wow, if it's snacks like this, let's do dinner at 630. Gosh. So by the way, I would have been so mad because it was like little kind of pays and you know, like this, the daughter is like, Oh my God, I'm going to be so full. We don't have to have lunch. We could just have dinner.

And I'm like, don't take away my meal. Don't take away lunch because you had three canopies and you're like deranged. No, I would have been furious. Yeah. We paid money for this with your GLP one ass. Get out of here. Yeah. Yeah. Don't speak for me. I want been furious. Yeah, we paid money for this with your GLP-1 ass. Get out of here. You don't speak for me. Yeah, don't speak for me.

I want my lunch, okay? Yeah, and I'm on a GLP-1 and I still want my goddamn lunch. I should have the right to sit there and ignore it with everybody else. There are those people though who will just like make a call for everyone and be like, this will be enough for me. We don't need to have lunch.

I'm like, yeah, give me a sandwich. Yeah,'t need to have lunch. I'm like, uh, yeah. Give me a sandwich. Yeah, she's a black light person. That's what they do. So now we are introduced to the chef that he's introduced to them and he's like, hello. So you won't eat lunch or dinner? And she's like, I won't eat lunch.

He's like, okay. God damn it. Well, these are smoked salmon bellinis, some fruit platters, some harissa spice, pita, and here we've got sea bream with Virgin Mary foam. I just had to get the Virgin Mary in there because I'm very Christian. No, really. He's like, if you arrange these, these canapes just right, it's going to look like Jesus being born in the manger. We have to eat something in a barn? Oh my God, get the black lights. Get the black lights.

I've made you dinner tonight with parsley sage rosemary on time. I'm sorry, can I ask you a question? What the fuck is Virgin Mary foam? I'm assuming it's like basically tomato juice and like horseradish and Worcestershire that was foamed up and added onto something. It's like probably like an actual like, like Bloody Mary, but Virgin Mary, but turned into a foam. It sounds like it's not like a Bloody Mary Virgin. Yeah.

Virgin Mary foam sounds like it's something that might be like green and whatever, but I think it's probably like Virgin Mary that he foamed up Because he's a very modern chef who loves trends from 2005. So so do you see he's calling the version? Foamy tomato juice black light goes. Oh gross. All right. Thank you chef. The fuck is wrong with you What's this man is so fucking rude. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappin's commercial. At 24, I lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me. And the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes, and politics. I would define reclaiming as to take back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again.

So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks, both recognizable and unrecognizable names about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph. My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up. They connected with the people that I'm talking to and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery app

or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple podcasts. Every successful business starts with an idea. And on the best idea yet, we're obsessed with those light bulb moments, like how a bored barista invented the Frappuccino during his downtime. And then it got acquired by Starbucks. Or how Patagonia's iconic fleece was inspired by a toilet seat cover. On the best idea yet, we dive into the untold origin stories behind the products you're obsessed

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Every big moment starts with a big dream. But what happens when that big dream turns out to be a big flop? From Wondery and Atwill Media, I'm Misha Brown and this is The Big Flop. Every week, comedians join me to chronicle the biggest flubs, fails, and blunders of all time like Quibi. It's kind of like when you give yourself your own nickname and you try to like get other people to do it. And the 2019 movie adaptation of Cats. Like if I'm watching the dancing and I'm noticing the feet aren't touching the ground, there's something wrong with the movie. Find out what happens when massive hype turns into major fiasco. Enjoy the big flop on the wonderi app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to the big flop early and ad free on wonderi plus. Get started with your free

trial at wonderi.com slash plus. So back to downstairs, so then it's like, can I wash blue stuff? No, not now. Crew stuff is never priority. Okay? Are you mad at me? No, I'm not mad. You just never worked on the boat.

I'm telling you because I have to. Okay, let me show you something. You were the last person to use this, no? Of course. Okay, but you need to put it back. Okay. And let me be honest, you're giving me a lot of attitude and that is not nice. Well, because you say come here, come here, come here, and then you scream at me because I don't

come and scream at you. Like I don't scream at you. You say come here and I come here, but it's like you're saying it in a mean way. But you have to come when I tell you, you know, and then you don't come. Okay, but like maybe that's a Brazilian people don't say please. Maybe you don't say please because you're Brazilian, but I'm French. Oh, really? Oh, because I'm Brazilian. Oh, okay. Why don't you say any Brie? I loved when she said that. I was dying. She's like, oh, really? Oh, because I'm Brazilian. Oh, okay. Where's your brie? Why don't you need brie? I loved what she said that I was dying. She's like, oh really? Maybe Brazilian people don't say please thing.

Maybe not. Maybe not. Maybe it's how you're doing poker. No, that's fine. That's a different culture. Don't bring croissants. You don't say please. That's okay, different culture. Well guys, I don't know if you've heard this,

but black lights are necessary. Where are the black lights? So the dad and his awful minion child are looking for their black lights and can't find it. And guess what? They're in their luggage and the luggage is not on the boat. It's not here.

No one thought to actually get the luggage, which would be a decky thing to do. So Fraser's like, so do you have an ETA on that luggage? Cause I don't think it's on board. So Fraser does what Fraser does, which is that he walks into Kerry's office and instead of, you know, Fraser going to KO and be like, you need to get the luggage.

He goes to Kerry and he's like, so the luggage, do we know when that's showing up? Because it's not anywhere. And I don't know where it is, but maybe someone should be in trouble because of it. I don't know, just putting it out there. Well, this is tricky because at first I just thought, well, the deckies are idiots, but they took,

they went and picked, the captain went over with Fraser to pick up the guests, right? Isn't that how this happened? And then they brought over the guests, but they didn't bring the luggage. So wouldn't this kind of be the captain's fault for not arranging a- That's what I thought at first,

but then I think that what they would do is they would bring the guests over and then send the boat back to get the luggage, because you don't want to have the guests wait while they put all the luggage in. So if they get the guests- Right, but did he tell the people, like, all right, we've got the guests,

go back and get their luggage. And also you don't want to leave the luggage just sitting on the dock either. So I would imagine you would have to have another boat coming over with the tender to get the guests, right? And who was the four cameraman who had to be on luggage duty, the one who had to stand there with the camera and just film the luggage, just love the cameraman who are just in this world where they see shit happening and can't

say anything, you know, I love that. Like on the amazing race that always happened on the amazing race, you know, when they were like trying to find the clue box, they can't see anything. You know? I love that. It's like on the Amazing Race. That always happened on the Amazing Race, you know, when they were like trying to find the clue box, they can't find it. So the cameraman's always like, you see them running off, the cameraman like pivots the camera over to like the clue box, like it hits.

Yeah. My favorite. So he's like, oh God, no luggage, fucking wankers. So Fraser does his thing now to the deck team. He's like, quick question, where's the luggage? Anybody know where luggage is? And Carl just starts laughing and like, oh no. So Kyle's gonna get it now, dun dun dun.

Yeah, there's no luggage. And so then Selene is trying to process this. They lost the luggage? They lost the luggage? And then- So funny, she's cracking up. She's like, Oh my God, that is so funny. Oh, who doesn't know vinegar now? Am I right? So Kerry calls KO to the office, to the wheelhouse.

He's like, Oh, well, we didn't get their luggage and we need to think. Okay. Guests are on the boat. Where's their luggage? Okay. When I said it's going to be a chart ever of adventure, it's not for the luggage, on the boat. Where's their luggage? Okay, when I said this could be a chart ever of adventure, it's not for the luggage, for the guests, okay? So go get the luggage. I can't think of everything. And I can help you guys get out as much as I can, but I'm there to help, but we need to get their luggage.

Yeah, and Carl's like, oh, it's a fuck up, you know, but hair wipe, hair wipe. Oh, there's just so much stuff happening, you know? Even though I have almost four years experience, it's my first time on 60 meter. It's a big boat, big boat. Oh, I don't know. We don't breathe. We don't breathe on the boat.

Yeah, it doesn't matter how big the boat is. You could be on a canoe. You left luggage on a dock, just unattended. I have to say, now that I'm thinking about this the next day and my head's a little bit more clear, I think this is Kerry's fault. You were the one who took the tender over and picked up the guess and didn't send anybody over to get the luggage. I think maybe he thought like, this is magic. It's a TV show where I guess he's going to get the guess.

So maybe they'll bring the luggage over. I'm going to say like, it would have been helpful for him to say something, but the Bozen should have known automatically to get the luggage. So then Sam, I guess I'll put it this way. No one's coming off as extraordinarily confident at this point.

Yeah, it's a shit show. It's always a shit show in the beginning. Not confident, yeah. So Sam, the Black Light guy is like, well, we can't do anything until we get our luggage. I mean, my wetsuit and everything is in the luggage. All right Yeah, by the way, this guy who's a big germaphobe He's gonna plunge himself into like the waters where there's all sorts of bacteria. So enjoy that sir

But of course, he's gonna cover with the wetsuit because even the waters too gross for him Hmm Wetsuit shaming I like it wet suits for simple swimming. Yeah for simple swimming. Yeah. Oh, that's true for simple swimming wearing a Wetsuit shaming. I like it. Wetsuit shaming for simple swimming. Yeah. For simple swimming. Yeah. Oh, that's true. For simple swimming, wearing a wetsuit is kind of-

Yeah. I mean, if you're going diving or something, but he's probably going to go get in the hot tub and be like, disgusting. With like a snorkel mask on. Yeah. So, well, your bags are, I'm just waiting to hear when they'll be there. Someone's going to grab them. Apparently, it's someone who has finger syphilis who's going get his hands all over your bag. So sorry I have to tell you that.

We sent our sniffliest person over there. Your luggage can be carried by hands covered in snot, right? There's not gonna be anything. Does your luggage, is it affected by tuberculosis? If someone happens to cough on it? We've got our favorite Stu bubonic plague going to pick up your luggage. You know, we understand that yachts are often displays of conspicuous consumption, but in this case, there's actual consumption that will be displayed. So I hope you're prepared for that on your luggage. This is funny too.

Fraser passes Rainbow and he goes, all right, I'm going to have you start on the tables. Now look into the deco closet and see what you can find for pan Asian fusion Japanese evening. Thank you. See what sort of stereotypical decor you could find that represents Japan. Chopsticks, ding dings, little clingy on the finger. I don't care just whatever it is. All right on the finger. I don't care. Just whatever it is. Alright, fried rice. I don't care.

Fortune cookie. Have it on there. Mar-jong. I don't know. Just get something from the closet. Can we arrange some ramekins that look like the Great Wall of China or something like that? Hey. It just sounds so funny to me. Like it's not a specific thing. Just whatever. Whatever you find in there. Whatever. Okay, you know what? I have a pad in my room.

Could you get that and a necktie? We can put it out there and be like pad tie. You know, something kind of Asian-ish. Japanese. Okay, so the luggage has arrived on board. And so Sam can start blacklight searching. He does the room. Now this is really impressive.

He does the room and there's no problem except for the little side switches on the nightstand, which I think is like a fair place to kind of miss. I mean, the fact that they sent in this chick to do it and it ended up being that clean, I think is impressive. But you know what's less impressive? If you're someone who is doing the black light thing, you probably are also someone who carries

the wipes. You know, you just said, get me the Clorox. Remember he was like, get me the Clorox. We need our Clorox. Right. But then I think he still has them clean it regardless, you know? So like, he's like, I have the Clorox, but I don't want to actually do the wiping myself. So here you do the wiping. Yeah. He's like, Fraser, Fraser, the light switches on the desk are disgusting. They are disgusting. Fix this. And he's like, all right.

It's not bad actually. Cheers to us. So then Kerry's talking to Lawrence. He's like, so you're in the groove, man? He's like, yeah, I'm good. He's like, all right. Well, if you're good at what you do, you'll push through. So just get through this one, you know, and just know that the implication is that if you're bad, if you can't get through this, then you're bad at what you

do. So just, just want to put that out there. He's like, yeah, well, I just don't want to be complaining. You know, it's like, oh, well, you're British mate. It's part of the territory. Just got all seed. And Lawrence does not laugh at all at that. He's like, that, well, you're British, mate, it's part of the territory. Just got all seed. And Loras does not laugh at all at that. He's like, that was supposed to be a joke. Got it. All right. Well, you know, I have anxiety, but you know, I want to do what I need to do. I'll just do the best of my abilities. Get through this grip. Putting this in the Lord's hands. Lord. Don't that Lord is a shit sous chef. I'll tell you that much. God damn

it. Jesus Christ, why can't you do better at organizing provisions? Am I wrong? God. The Lord's like, hey, so I actually can't be there to help you, but I'm going to keep tabs on you. So I'm going to send some camera people just to film you like and just check the footage later. Yeah. Jesus is like, I created the cameraman that are now giving me the entertainment of watching you break down. Might want to check into Buddhism. The Lord did that. See, that's why I always think of Whitney Rose. I always think of all the things that he's complaining about. He's like, I just need to, I just need to, I just

need to remember Jesus because all these terrible things. I'm like, you know what? The terrible things the Lord did that. So then Kyle is trying to sneak in a cigarette and so, and Kay I was joining him. And then now Fraser has welcomed everyone to a pan Asian fusion Japanese taste on life. So Japanese tasting menu, but for some reasons, pan Asian and sounds like wonderful. And Fraser, if I could just remind the chef, please, please destroy the meat, take the very good quality meat and cook it on as high temperature as possible. Got it, got it. You don't need to say another thing.

The meat, we've all heard it. Don't want it bloody. Want it black, cooked through. Got it. Exactly, Black Light Man. Exactly. I want you to look at your steak and say, that's a Black Light steak. All right?

We want that steak to feel like it could have a garden and be two women, two women who've seen time pass them by. Gray, gray, gray steak. You think actually. The least pan Asian thing I've ever heard, by the way. But all right, we'll do it. Do it for you. If you're, if you're a chef with anxiety, I would love to, I would love to get this order because it's one less thing to worry about is making sure that the primary steak is cooked properly.

You just put it in the oven and just let it go. And you can do everything else and you come back to it. It comes back a shriveled little piece of meat and this guy will be thrilled. Dave Korsunsky Yeah. And I love the little girls because they get chicken tenders and fries and it's presented like it's a very fancy meal. It's like chicken tenders and fries. And someone goes, wow, you sure's a very fancy meal. It's like chicken tenders and fries. I know, but the font.

And someone goes, wow, you sure have a lot of cat, and she goes, wow, I sure have a lot of french fries. Stupid. Brett. Like, you fucking moron adult. Yeah, what do you think? Because I got a plate of fries here. Moron.

Stick to the adults table you belong, idiot. So downstairs, Celine is working on the cabins and she touches a, like an iron and she goes, oh, it's hot, he burned me. It's because of course it's hot, it's an iron. It's like, oh, you are mean to me. So Carrie's telling Fraser that the energy is getting better in the galley,

which is good, but little does he realize the energy is actually going the exact opposite direction. It's not going better at all. So now we find out that these steaks suck, right? They are not cut, they are pink. And so Sam's like, I'm sending these back. And so he sends his back, but'm sending these back. And so, he sends his back, but then everyone else is like, yeah, and it's kind of cold too. He's like,

we will not have this, Sam. I mean, Fraser, universally, the steaks are cold. Universally. Even the steaks on the next boat over are cold. Your chef is so goddamn incompetent. Get these out of here. Hold on, I just saw everything everywhere all at once. Hello, I just want to check with your multiverse. Are your stakes cold too? Yep, guess what? It's not just Universal, it's multi-universal at this point. It's a problem.

There's a new ride at the studios with cold pink bean. Little children are being forced to ride. Universally cold, Fraser, get these out. I don't know if you heard, but Epic Universe, Universal's Epic Universe just opened up and their steaks are cold and tough. It's an epic universality about these steaks.

It's out of control. And it's tough, meat tough. Get the fuck out of here, Fraser. So he takes them and he's like, Chef, I'm really sorry to do this to you, but the meats are cold, all right? So did they not have sternos back in 80, 80 began or?

I, by the way, I have to say this guy has a lot of nerve complaining about tough steak while he's asking for his meat to be cooked burnt to a crisp. He's like, wow, the steak is tough. I don't want to hear that. Please get me black steak that is tender. Yes, please. and stuff. I don't want to hear that. I know. Please get me black steak that is tender. Yes, please.

So now Lawrence is spiraling, of course. And then the guest goes, I mean, if I ordered a filet at a restaurant and you served me that, I would have sent it back. Oh, yeah. Thank you for that theoretical situation. You also sent it back in this situation, too. I don't need it to be illustrated. It was it was bad.

If you order a filet at a restaurant all the way black, well done, you will be kicked out of the restaurant. They won't serve, any decent restaurant would be like, go, just get out. So Sam's like, just tell them to skip the steak. I don't even want to touch the steak. I'm disgusted.

So these people just love making the other people at the table not eat things. Okay, they're very controlling people. Yeah, because honestly, So these people just love making the other people at the table not eat things. Okay. They're very controlling people. Yeah. Because honestly, so the primaries was basically, it was medium. I would say it was medium well. It had a little bit of pink in it.

It really was not that much. It was a little bit of pink. And honestly, he did request it to be well done and it was not well done. And he had every right to send it back, not to a satisfaction. Everyone else's steaks actually looked perfect. And then all of a sudden, you know, it was one of those things where one person says mine's cold. And then everyone else says, yeah, mine's cold too. And it's tough. I'm like, you know what, for some reason, I don't believe that they were actually cold or tough.

I think that they're just picky people. And now all of a sudden it's all being sent back. But I would have liked my steak. I would have liked second chance steak. Yeah, me too. I'll eat anything. I'll try all your steaks, send them over. I don't even eat meat, but hey, it's free. Send it on over here. Give me the steak. So, so now Lawrence is mad because he's just finished plating the new steak. It's a phrase just like, I'm terribly sorry, but they don't want the steak. He's like, oh, fucks sake. So now it's the next is a teriyaki glazed chicken wing with onions and asparagus. By the way, Mr. To mission star restaurant What are you doing serving the steak before the chicken? This is but steak is the grand finale of the of the progression. I thought that was a little weird, too

Yeah, he's serving a chicken wing after the steak, but what do I know? So they loved this they absolutely loved this like wow a chicken wing with the with the actual bones removed You know how germy bones are? This chef is fucking amazing. You put a tablecloth on my lap and get him out here to do a lap dance. Make sure it's a plastic tablecloth. I do not want to feel his skin.

And then they get a tropical fruit salad with mango cream, which, wow, I think that seems like a pretty simple dessert. So I don't know why this guy was really losing his mind over this. So then Lawrence is, he's just, but he is losing his mind. He's like, well, this day has been enough for me to be honest and with those camera people coming in, I just want to tell them to fuck off.

So yeah, you know about that. You're on TV show, like, Rickett TV. Here he goes, he's starting to lose it. So now people are like going to bed and he's slowly spinning out. He's like, I can't with the stove. I just can't. Please, please leave. Please leave the kitchen. Get out of here, cameraman.

And so the cameraman's like, okay, geez. And then a producer comes in. It's like, what's going on, Lawrence? I'm fucking done. I'm fucking done. You can't set up for Chartered like this. Everything's everywhere. My head's up. My fucking fucking done. Fucking done. You can't set up for charter like this. Everything's everywhere. My head's up my fucking asshole. It never happens. I can deal with so much but it's like Jesus Christ, I'm starting to shake. Look at me. I'm shaking here. This

still doesn't work. That fucking thing doesn't work. That thing fucking works. Okay, but the cameras are here to film a show and everyone's just doing their job here. He's like, he's losing it and Carrie hears him and he's like, their job here. He's like, oh, he's losing it. And Carrie hears him and he's like, what's going on in there? And Francis is like, not happy. Not and Lawrence is still like, you know what I mean? I mean, just so then I get told they want to make me succeed out. Bullocks, fucking bullocks.

It's a lie. It's a lie. You people don't want me to succeed. You want me breaking down. Like, yeah, and you're doing it already. It usually takes a whole season to get someone to this point, sucker. You're giving us great footage and he's like, my head is so fucking off all up my ass. I'm fucking furious.

I just can't. He's like, all right, mate. Because Kerry comes in to intervene. He's like, mate, once you get this environment worked out, you're going to shine. He's like, oh really? I just don't really know what to do. I'm shaking. That doesn't work. This keeps on breaking. Nothing fucking just don't really know what to do. I'm shaking.

That doesn't work. This keeps on breaking. Nothing fucking works. I can't do another tartar. I'm sorry. To be continued. What a wuss. Now, I would be pissed off too if the stuff in there wasn't working, but this is not the

way. Well, I think it was one of those induction burners because those can be really tricky because sometimes they're like, no, I just don't want to work anymore. It's not that they don't work. It's like they have to send something and then a lot of times they're like, failure, sorry, not today. I have to use the microwave.

Sorry about that. Yeah, it did look like that. But yeah, those things suck. You have to have everything in there stainless steel or whatever. But yes, or stainless steel. Is that the pans that work with those? Is the steel? It's something I forget. Steel pans, right?

I was just using one last week and it was being very annoying about this sort of stuff. Yeah. Anyway, that brings us to the end of Below Deck. I thought it was fantastic. I'm excited for the season. I hope they can keep it up. It was hilarious. Can't wait.

Thanks everyone for being here. And tomorrow we got a whole more new shows. Next Gen, New York City, The Valley, all the good stuff. Talk to you next time. Bye! Peace! Watch what crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alice in King. It's always a party on Alice in Block.

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